#i am a mess though lol

[latitudesunknown]

.

#alright #after throwing up one last time at 10.15pm yesterday #kitty seems not to have thrown up since then #(i finally managed to fall asleep a little after midnight but i always wake up when she throws up and can't find any fresh stains anywhere) #starting at 5am she came back to the bedroom and started drinking again #at 8 she scarfed down the tuna she hadn't touched yesterday so fast I was sure she was going to puke it all up #but it's been two hours and no puking so far #called the vet's assistant to get reassurance #she said to give her food in small quantities and monitor her #but if she doesn't start throwing up again there's no reason to bring her in #she advised me to stop letting her eat catnip altogether #(she started vomiting after eating some yesterday) #it's sad coz kitty loves it so but i agree sth that makes you throw up doesn't seem like a great idea #especially since she's never had pbs with fur balls #anyway #keeping my fingers crossed but i'm hopeful #i am a mess though lol #sleep deprived and starving but with no appetite #and a big meeting in 20mn 😅 #but ah well #small price to pay if my darling's alright

[happistar]

just a quick meal in the middle of an investigation :)

#cbs elementary #elementary #elementary sherlock #joan watson #happi's art #this show is great so far #currently only in the middle of season 2 #but i am so attached to so many of the characters <3 #the perspective w/ the buildings on this image absolutely killed me though augh #messing around w/ my art style currently so this piece is very rendered lol #also accidental trans colors #it was more prominent before messing w/ the colors of the image but still

[lavender-temult]

why do baby otohan’s colors look like fuckign TOOTHPASTE in this version 😭😭😭

#first version was a red-orange to vaguely green yellow analogous palette then i messed with the clothes a little and now i am failing at #color theory. help. this split complementary teal(ish) color and orange(ish) and pink(ish) is NOT working out #i do like my og colors so I’ll recolor this clothing version with that palette. but make otohan’s skin more saturated lol #i always desaturate skin so much 😭 it looks okay after rendering but OOF. light skin especially fucks me up WHY IS IT SO HARD TO DRAW #but yeah back to the original point I’m definitely gonna try out a bunch of different color palettes #i like the new clothes. i was definitely NOT an outdoorsy kid so idk what I’m doing here but #for the purposes of giving her a pointy stick I hc otohan to be that. i love the outdoorsy toothpaste baby. that’s a normal sentence to say #about otohan thull who is not depicted to be ANY of those things canonically. can you imagine if she was though. toothpaste killed 3 of bh #while screaming and crying and flailing around as babies do. can you imagine #… can y’all tell it’s INCREDIBLY late lmao? #wait i think i have a “late night art rambling” tag one sec #anyways that’s that for tonight’s late night art ramblings lol #<- THERE IT IS! #art ramblings

[lobotomyladylives]

Being yelled at by your father is not abuse so you're right about thinking you're not traumatized enough. Get a grip.

is this supposed to upset me or what

#you dont have the context so why would i take this to heart lol #when i gave my old therapist a rundown of stuff he said & did to me i rememher being like ''but it wasnt ABUSE though'' & he just kind of #went quiet then told me it was one of the worst cases of parent->kid emotional abuse he'd ever personally heard from a patient #so i just think of that when i convince myself i dont have a right to be as broken by it as i am just bc it could have been worse #i know it could have. but it was still bad. & the only proof i need is how messed up i am bc of it #asks

[purpleshadow-star]

This was Andrew's first oh moment. Like, he literally said, "Oh." Twice. 31 pages into the first book. He started falling for Neil literally in their second interaction.

He's such a mess.

#but we love him #literally a hot mess though lol #hes so gone #the forst interaction was 'oh shit he's hot' #and the second interaction (this one) was 'oh shit hes hot *and* smart' #poor andrew he never stood a chance #yes i am currently rereading aftg #we'll see how far i get before my short attention span demands i read smth else #all for the game #aftg #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil

[sonic-adventure-3]

shadow doodle that got out of hand

#my art #shadow #shadow the hedgehog #sth #digital painting #shadow’s so fun to draw cause i can fuck around completely with the colours #it’s fun giving him strange coloured blood #i know the predominant headcanon is giving him greed blood like the black arms #but have you considered neon pink? maybe purple? orange even? #does shadow even bleed canonically who’s to say what colour his blood is #every time i draw him bleeding or the inside of his mouth i’m gonna give him a weird colour from now on #i messed up so bad exporting this and then i did some edits on my phone and messed up exporting it again evn worse #so it’s very blurry and artifact filled lmao #woops ☆〜（ゝ。∂） #know that i drew this and am writing these tags early in the morning and i have not slept in a while #i’m queuing this to post at a reasonable time though lol #blood #blood tw #bright colors #lmk if i should tag anything else

[lilyblisslys]

bored at work with nothing to do today, feel free to send asks (or DMs if we’re mutuals) 🙌

#I have so much to do at home though 😭 #our kitchen is a mess+i need to cook smth+my laundry situation is batshit #I am so drained lol

[imwritesometimes]

How it was when I went to bed last night

How it's going today

#to anyone and everyone who booped me - thank you! I am going to try to boop ppl back here in a little bit #my notifs are kinda a janky mess though not cause of the boops though cause that one boop meme post I made was uhhh a hit lol #so if I miss someone it's not personal my notifs are just DESTROYED from the meme post lol #erin explains it all

[misc-obeyme]

My family: Hey you wanna come to lunch with us today? We’re gonna make you anyway because when was the last time you left your house?

Me: Well I WOULD but you see I’m neck deep in an obsession about my OC for a mobile otome game and even though I’m not editing his story like I should be right now, I am fleshing out his relationships with the canon characters & my other OCs just for my own knowledge and like yeah I could leave it for a bit but I am just in the MIDDLE of it right now-

My family: 🙂

Me: Yeah okay lemme get my shoes on.

This is how it would go if I even bothered trying to explain the OC stuff to them. But while my parents are aware of the shenanigans, they don’t get it & I already know that excuse won’t work. So fine I guess I’ll leave my house today.

#I’m sorry about this I’m just taking a break from tidying my house so they don’t think I live in a mess all the time #though I kinda do because of the adhd #and I can’t stop thinking about Arrie #and how I’d rather be working on his stuff right now lol #I am the worst #sorry family I love you #misc rambles

[six-of-cringe]

Firepox just doesn't have the same ring to it

Bonus:

#is this something #sorry if quality makes it hard to read #just looking thru some jesper chapters trying to make sure the quotes were right is causing me literal mental illness #also reminding me of inej and jesper's friendship and kaz and jesper's more messed up friendship and jesper and matthias's budding friendsh #which was cut tragically short #also reminding me how much less focus wylan gets in the series as a whole at the detriment of his character lol lol lol #saw the sticky notes i made for the bfwp my brain is back on the grind it has marinated i am ready to write this stupid fucking thing #if leigh bardugo won't write sufficient information about wylan then i fucking will #rn though jesper on my fucking brain. #jesper fahey #kaz brekker #six of crows #soc #tgt #six of crows memes #soc shitpost

[hannahhasafact]

I truly hate all of my art right now including the thing I’m currently working on, but damn it I’m still going to finish it and post it because the concept is cute to me and maybe other people will also think the concept is cute

#ramblings #venting #I’ve just been looking at all of my art lately and been like ‘wow. you are bad at art.’ and then I don’t draw because even though I want to #I hate what I produce #and I know that I’m not the worst because even today I got nice things said about my art but I just feel like I’m so shit at art #and I’ve been drawing for so long and am still so bad. #anyways. I want to feel happy drawing again but right now I’m not and it makes me really sad. #but even if I hate my art maybe someone will like it #anyways. #unrelated but my nose is hurting so bad I think there dust in my heater that’s been messing with me and bijou because I’ve been stuffed up #but also yesterday I went out into the cold and I think I got a cut in my nose because today if I bother it it stings #(and I also was like ‘this face sunscreen burned my face’ I think the cold fucked up my face lol

[penname-artist]

rahh guess whose bored and also back

#ahhhhwagoowakagableh #I am actually alive I swear #no the Chloeitis did not get me #but it sure is goddamn TRYIN bro #ALSO. GUYS. #GUESS WHO HAS M E D I C A T I O N #ya boi got put on ZOLOFT of all things #it's been a mess. but I think it's gonna be worth it #and and and and and! #I have arrrrrts #no fics yet though. been pokey. #mostly been away to deal with above mentioned 'pen on zoloft' deal #I have been SO...YEAH. #just yeah I have been very yeah #I am so glad that woman gave me anxiety meds as needed with it because I was gonna NEED it on this other bitch lol #try going from 0 to 60 heart rate for like. no reason #please I just wanted to do the eepy #and a lot of other shit happened this month too and a lot of it is really. bad. #but I'm trying to NOT think about any of that and just be whatever I am and do whatever I'm doing #I'm sorry this is so long I didn't want to make a real news thing #I was lazy and also yknow. the hate spam lol #but YEAH if you made it this far hi hello I am alive yaaay #time to abuse my PPAA children again :3 #and my mutuals while I'm at it- #HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

[cryptcatz]

made a comment about how homeschooling needs to be changed and better regulated because it is so often used to isolate and abuse children and not even really educate them, and it’s funny how the ppl who attacked me for that comment were all clearly conservative evangelicals who think homeschooling is the perfect tool to abuse their children lmao

“oh so you think we should throw homeschooling out the window and force all children to be indoctrinated into public school, which is perfect and abuse never occurs there?!” not what i said at all bro where is your reading comprehension

#i literally partially defended homeschooling in my comment because for health reasons i would not have been able to do public school???? #homeschooling #homeschool #school #schooling #dunno what to tag lmao #personal #really did surprise me how many ppl were yelling at me about it though #but from things they said they were clearly a fan of all the aspects of homeschooling that i criticized #like yeah it’s super cool that i learned basically nothing and am still learning basic history and science now that i’ve graduated lol #but obviously public school is a mess too im not gonna claim it is perfect at all #BOTH desperately need change

[earl-grey-crow]

okay lads what did we think of that

#THAT OPENING SCENE #yeah kat and thomas's relationship was rushed maybe to the point where it felt shoehorned in #but that opening scene OUGH #chyler leigh the actress that you are #the way my heart just sank when kat realized cyrus would be dead if it weren't for her like this girl does not need to feel yet again #that she's messed everything up. oh the parallels! #very good hallmark very good #<- words I should have no right saying and yet here I am #the way home hallmark #though I do feel they rush by the major emotional beats like thomas's and colton's death #and also I'm a bit ?? over the ending because it almost seemed like kat expected jacob? when I thought we all knew he wasn't going back? #and also by pond mechanics he couldn't do that? #I don't think they gave it as much cliffhanger suspense as they could've #also did I cry when del and kat finally finally made up? maybe! #and it was all because of VICTOR my WORD #casey is a mystery and a wonder and a marvel I love them #and SUSANNA good GRIEF that was so good #and I'm still not on board with sam lol #del and colton are perfect it just feels so wrong for sam to come in #what an episode what a season what a series #season three save me save me season three #earl crow ramblings

[whumpy-wyrms]

🫚, 🍒, and🫓?

from this ask game

ginger answered here!

🍒Cherry - Which two of your Ocs are most weirdly alike now that you think about it?

ASPEN AND ANTON. they’re so weirdly alike just hear me out.

they’re both WEIRD just in general like they’re silly fellas. they both love green, they both love animals and nature, they’re both connected to a specific animal (Aspen likes wolves and Anton likes rats), neither of them like people very much and would be happier living in a whimsical forest forever. they both got the tism and are trans masc, they’re both lonely and touched starved as fuck (but really who isn’t), just in general their personalities are similar. their NAMES are similar.

Anton and Aspen would info dump about literally anything and everything to each other, neither of them would ever stop talking. Anton would find a way to make Aspen a shapeshifter (and not fail this time) so he’d be able to turn into a wolf whenever he wants. Aspen and Anton would go outside ALL THE TIME and they would love going on walks in the forest together and befriend all kinds of silly animals.

Aspen wouldn’t want to leave because his life SUCKED before. as you know, he was a complete nobody and in his canon story, nobody cared that he died at all. so nobody would be looking for him if he was taken as Anton’s test subject, except Lyle, but in this fake au scenario i’m making up right this second uhh maybe she’s there too. or maybe Anton made a clone for Aspen i mean yeah that’s more likely.

no wait. Lyle would be FUN too. i haven’t talked much about her but she’s also weird and silly and unhinged like Aspen so like the three of them would be unstoppable together it’d be so silly wow. wow this is such a fun scenario

like Aspen and Anton are literally PERFECT for each other guys idk what Anton was thinking making that Dew guy his test subject. Aspen was RIGHT THERE. and he’s IMMORTAL

🫓(Idk what this thing is) - Wild card! Tell me your favorite fact or something you want to share about your Ocs or Oc world.

fun fact! while i was writing all that nonsense up there i got an even better idea. so i am maybe writing a tllr and brc crossover au where Anton’s a vampire and takes Aspen (who’s probably not immortal in this but who knows i literally just had this idea just now) as his thrall. currently losing my marbles over this actually

#ask #tllr ask #brc ask #anton oc #aspen oc #lyle oc #GUYSSSSSS #losing my MIND #i was gonna make an au where anton enthralls dew (and i still am) but some of the ideas i had were really ooc for dew #and then i got to thinking and like you know me and thinking #i was ORIGINALLY gonna make the most self indulgent piece of writing anyone has ever seen where anton straight up enthralls Me but #i. don’t know if i would ever post that LOL #DUDE!!!!! ASPEN’S RIGHT THERE!!! THE FREAK!!!!! (affectionate) #i’m so normal about this #i am writing like five billion things at once so idk when i’ll finish it #anton and aspen will have the most silliest dynamic you’ve ever seen #but since anton’s a vampire he’d also have so much power over him and be super possessive and keep him enthralled #BUT aspen might be fine with that tbh who knows #it’s cozy they’re friends dw #i’m projecting on aspen (and dew) so hard rn #when am i not though #this post is a mess anon you did NOT ask for all this nonsense

[studiousbotanist]

#does a bear blog in the woods #just phantom period stuff fuckingbw my brain chem i think is whats going on this week ! #i knew the new tfb would rip emotions outta me but im messed uppppp . #ive been single the longest ive been in a Long Time now ... #theres good and bad . theres so much cooking in my head from these few months #dealint with grief . bad job . good job now #and still working on getting my life and health togethwr #and im really trying to craft and make shit again . its So necessary for your soul and ive been neglecting #tabletop has helped so much and roleplay will too qhen i get into it #in the mean time though . im LONELY !! im in a mood where being by myself is Torrrtureeee . butnive also been overstimmed ! #i was very somber earlier cuz i jusf did Not have rhe energy to be up and do shit ..wjich is why i called out #but was just thinking the thing i miss most abt a relationship is always having some1 to hang out w or be around #especially physical side cause i am very physically affectionate !!! and tryin to get back to it . #its been hard cus of well ...trauma and also the pandemic . overthinking . itd help if i cried i think #i coulsve put this all ina read more ..too late now LOL ! #i just want to word vomit . been stuck in a bad nasty rude to myself feedback loop abt NOT venting and NEEDING to reach out directly #but good gd its difficult when we are All exhausted . and when i judt Need the vocal speak vs typing #if u read all this mess thank you LOL . ill be okay . ive got to let myself feel this