#i can’t explain to u guys how traumatized i am | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lavenderwhore444 · 3 years

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God Im pretty sure I’m going to hell ANYWAYS ok so this is a hybrid cat shigaraki, u end up adopting shigaraki from a very abuses owner so our little kitten is traumatized and terrified of everything, it took u a bit of time until he was comfortable with u , he doesn’t trust u in the beginning and thinks ur gonna do the same as his previous owner did but ur different u were so patient, sweet and soft not to mention he LOVED getting head pets from u ( he would never admit it tho) once shigaraki found out that he was in love with u he was stuck to ur hip ( he was super clingy) shigaraki’s heat was closer then expected, shigaraki didn’t want to ruin his chances with u but he couldn’t stop himself from humping everything so he hid in his room , you absolutely loved shigaraki since the day u saw him u knew u wanted him, when u first met him he scratched and hissed at u he was terrified, it honestly made u sick knowing the person who did this to him is still alive, u both got much closer he even started cuddling with u!!!! U soon fell in love with shiggy but u didn’t want to ruin what u guys have so u kept it to ur self , u noticed shigaraki was acting weird and hid in his room for two days at first u thought u might give him some space but u started getting worried u wanted to check on him before u came in u heard some little moans and whines, it just hit u that ur little kitten has there heat, u decided to help out 👀

Kinks pet-play of course dom reader and sub shigaraki maybe some pegging that’s all I can think of so feel free to add any kinks. I was listening to hello kitty by Avril Lavigne there was part where she says “ come come kitty kitty your so pretty pretty” that was inspired me to write this lmaooo

-🤡

HELLO KITTY

If you want to use interactive fics, it's easy and makes reading fics SO much better. First, you download the Google Chrome extension. You'll see it in the top right corner of your screen. Next, you enter your name in the first box. If you want to change something other than y/n, please click on the text that says “want to change something other than y/n?” here, you can change any word you want to a different word. When I talk about your quirk I will use y/q.

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Samesies, but it's ok, we’ll go to hell together 😫

Now you might be wondering, Claire, why did this take you literal MONTHS? Well, I wanted to perfect it. I love this concept so much that I just HAD to spend so much time on it to make it perfect. And let me just say, it's pretty good 😏

Warnings: vaginal sex, overstimulation (male), anal sex with strapon, heat, pillow humping, marking mating, whatever you want to call it.

I've decided I'm obsessed with making cat shiggy meow ☺️

‘Where the fuck am I?’ Is shigaraki’s first thought of the day.

He’s never been on a bed this soft or a house this warm. Where is he? The blankets are all fuzz. The bed is littered with stuffed animals and pillows, and sweet-smelling candles, are burning somewhere. Is he being sacrificed?

“Hey, you're awake, ” a soft voice says, coming from the end of the bed.

He recoils in fear but, upon second glance, he sees that you aren't who he thinks you are. A girl replaces the scary form of his “master.” he looks you up and down. He has to admit you are quite pretty. The sight of someone other than the large man who used to own him excites him. Maybe this is a fresh start? But perhaps you're just like him...

“Get the fuck away from me, ” he snaps, scrambling into a corner.

“It's okay, sweetie, ” you say, “I'm not gonna hurt you, ”

“Everyone says that, meow ” Shigaraki retorts, “get the fuck away before I scratch your eyes out, ”

You bite your lip, “ok, Tomura, I'm gonna sit with you for a while, though. I'll be right across the room if you need anything, ”

“I don't need shit from you, ” he says, hissing making a show of his claws.

You laughed a little, more than a bit sad at his fear, “alright, but I’ll still be here, ”

He sits in silence for a moment, surveying his surroundings. He notices fresh clothes in the dresser, and there are some game consoles set up for him. How do you know he likes video games? Fucking creep. There aren't really any escape routes but escaping is complicated when he doesn't know where he is.

“Where am I meow?” he asks, sounding meeker than intended.

“I guess I kind of adopted you, ” you explain, “we’re at our house, ”

“Why did you do that?” he asks, the edge coming back to his voice.

“You just seemed so sweet, and the man who owned you was so mean. I couldn't just leave you there; he was hurting you, ” you say, frowning a little at the thought of Tomura getting hurt.

"Why do you care?" he snaps.

You sit closer to him, making him tense.

"I already told you, I think you're sweet Tomura," you repeat, "I just can't explain it. I'd really like it if we could become friends,"

'Or maybe more,' you think to yourself.

You can't deny he is very attractive.

"How do I know you're not lying meow?" He asks.

"I think you'll just have to trust me. Do you want to play some games with me?" you ask.

"Fine," he says, "only cause I'm bored,"

You grin, "awesome. What should we play?"

Shigaraki stands up and walks over to the games, tail swaying.

"This," he says, holding up animal crossing, "you probably like it cause it's dumb. What's your name anyway?" he asks.

"I'm y/n," you answer.

"I guess your names not awful, meow”, he mutters.

Truthfully, he already thinks you're beautiful, and you seem so kind. Shigaraki sits unusually close to you on the bed as the two of you play. You play late into the night; he makes a good bit of progress. Eventually, you feel his head rest on your shoulder, and he falls asleep on you.

You ease Tomura into your lap.

"There we go," you whisper, "you're safe now,"

Little did you know he's wide awake, smiling to himself and nuzzling his head closer to you. The sound of soft purring fills your ears as he drifts off into the most peaceful sleep.

He's pretty disgruntled when he wakes up alone. Where have you gone? Shigaraki doesn't have to wonder for long when you come back with a plate of food.

"Hey, are you hungry?" you ask, setting a plate of food on the table next to him.

He nods, digging in right away. You watch him eat like a man starved. Honestly, he might have been. He puts the plate down and moves closer to you. He's beginning to trust you more and more.

"Tomura, ” you say, “I have to put a collar on you now, just in case you get lost, ok?” you push some hair out of his face, “id be so sad if I lost you, ”

“fine, meow” he mumbles.

Truthfully his heart is melting at the thought. That you aren’t embarrassed by him, that you want to keep him safe and close to you. When you click the collar into place he hugs you, tugging at your shirt.

It’s shocking how fast he’s becoming comfortable with you but definitely pleasing. The next few days are calm, spent lounging around the house. He‘s getting so trusting with you. He occasionally pushes his head beneath your hand so you scratch his head. He always denies it, though; he has a tough-guy exterior to keep up.

However, something changes within him. He feels a strange warmth, not a necessarily bad feeling, around you. Tomura knows what cats were supposed to do. They are supposed to cuddle and play with their owners. Should he be doing that? Should he act like a “normal cat”? He concludes that you don’t want that at all. The lack of cat toys, a cat tree, and you allowing him to eat at the table solidify that.

However, he does want to cuddle. He tries to cuddle like all the time. But you have work, and you get tired, and you run errands, and he becomes sad. Tomura knows you have a life outside of him, but you really shouldn't. He should be your only priority. When Christmas break finally rolls around, and you start spending more time at the house, he's elated.

He has internet access, of course. He needs it to play his video games! But it was restricted. You don’t want your little kitty to see things he’s not supposed to. He starts to like watching movies too. At first, they‘re action movies with lots of blood and fighting, which you don’t necessarily agree with, but it doesn’t seem to bother him. He slowly gets bored with them and stumbles across a romance movie.

Tomura becomes engrossed in them. He loves watching the couple fall in love and be happy. One movie, in particular, weirds him out. It looks like they were taking off their clothes. They start kissing and making strange noises. He doesn't like it one bit, it makes his cheeks feel hot, and his cock gets semi-hard. He turns it off immediately.

It doesn’t take long for him to forget about it and keep watching different ones. Soon he finds some similarities between him and the main character. The way they feels around their love interest is the same way he feels around you. Is he in love with you?! It seems so and you have just recently come to the same conclusion as him.

Soon he’s all over you, following you everywhere. Tomura pushes open your door every night and snuggling up to you. He’ll purr and nuzzle into you, happy sighs escaping him. Whenever he “accidentally” wakes you up, you never get mad at him. You just cuddle him and talk all night, giggling and talking until you both fall asleep.

Oddly enough, you‘re oblivious to his feelings for you. Whenever he cuddles with you, you hold back the urge to kiss him on the lips. You don’t want him to feel awkward around you. Soon he starts acting strange without any change in behavior from you. He stops coming in your room at night and wont come out of his room.

You don't want to be overbearing, so you give him space...for a while. Meanwhile, in his room, Tomura is lying naked on the bed, panting and sweating. He feels strange, just like he did when he was watching that movie. He doesn't understand what‘s happening to his body but when he humps his pillow it feels like an itch is being scratched. The first time he cums he‘s terrified and lets out a scared “meow!”

But it feels so good. The feeling doesn't go away, so he decides the only solution is to keep humping. Soon he‘s limp but still grinding his hips on the poor pillow. He takes deep whiffs of your sweater, huffing it like a drug. His tongue is lolling out of his mouth and his eyes are rolling back in his head. He‘s starting to hurt down there but he just can't stop cumming.

Oh, why can't he reach the phone you left in his room? Why is his voice too hoarse to call out to you? Tomura is scared. He can’t eat or sleep. Sweat has soaked into the mattress and his poor little cock is starting to hurt. You‘re getting worried too so you wander up to his room and callout to him, pressing your ear to the door.

“y/n meow,” he calls out hoarsely, almost a whisper.

All you can hear are desperate whines and moans. Is Tomura...in heat? Oh, your poor kitty is probably in so much pain! You have to help him, so you open the door and see him. It is a pathetic (yet erotic) sight. He looks so desperate. He‘s crying and looks so scared. Tomura just whines and reaches out to you even though he‘s far away.

“Oh, sweetheart,” you whisper.

You walk over to him and scoop him up, sitting him on your lap. He continues to try and hump you, but you can tell how much his poor dick hurts. You hug him tightly, feeling guilty that you took so long to check on him.

Tomura tugs at your shirt, he can't figure out why he wants you to take off your clothes, but he does. You oblige, ready to do anything your sweet kitten wants. When he sees your top half naked, he feels his cock beg for you. He starts to tug aimlessly at your pants, and you take them off, once again, all too eager to please.

He doesn't have any sexual knowledge, but he has instincts, pure carnal instincts that tell him just how to breed his mate’s tight pussy. Tomura grabs your hips, his claws accidentally puncturing the skin. You yelp as he pulls you on top of him. When he slams you down onto his long fat cock he doesn't get the rush of pleasure he expected.

He's hit with an extreme amount of pain and lets out a panicked meow. You lift yourself off of him quickly, and Tomura misses the feeling of your cunt even though it caused him so much pain. He paws at you, but you keep him from shoving himself in you again.

“Tomura,” you say softly, “you need to calm down; you're hurting yourself,”

“Meow! need!” he cries.

“So needy,” you mutter, “youre just gonna hurt yourself,”

“Don’t care! Need!” he begs.

“Hold on,” you say, getting up and ignoring the insistent pawing at your shirt as he whines.

You rifle through your drawers until you find the dildo you got and the free strap-on attachment that came with it. You smile and gran some lube; this is exactly what you need for your pretty kitty. He watches with curious eyes and blown out pupils due to pure lust.

“Let's give your poor cock a break,” you say.

He nods, but where are you going to put that? You climb onto the bed with him, and he hugs you, sucking on your tit. He feels so at peace. Your boobs are so soft and pretty. He wants to stay like this forever. But when Tomura feels those nimble fingers of yours start to trail across his lower back just above his ass he shivers.

He leaves open-mouthed kisses across your chest; he lets them get sloppy and wet as you rub his back.

“Need,” he whispers again, eyes half-lidded.

You tilt Tomura’s head up and give him his first proper kiss. He's seen this in movies and knows you're supposed to say “I love you” after...right? He doesn't know the full meaning of the three little words he's about to say.

“I love you y/n,” he says when you pull away.

“I love you too,” you say, taken aback just a bit.

He gives you a love-drunk smile and tries to rut against your thigh but yelps again, remembering how sensitive he is.

“C’mere pretty kitty,” you coo, “lay on your back for me,”

He nods and lays on his back, painfully aware of how exposed he is to your careful, calculating eyes. He starts purring when you muzzle your head into his neck. Are you going to mark him?! Do you really want him to be your mate?! Oh, he hopes so! He smiles, and his breathing picks up, but his ears flatten on his head when you pull away.

“No mate meow?” Tomura asks, face falling.

For the first time all day, he feels his cock soften sadly. He doesn't understand the look of confusion on your face and tears up a bit.

“I'm not sure I understand,” you say, brushing some hair out of his face and feeling guilty when you see his teary eyes.

“I want you to mark me,” he says, bottom lip quivering, “please meow?”

Your eyes widen, “oh,” maybe you did learn something useful in school, “of course honey,”

You lean down again, unsure of how hard to bite his neck. You can tell exactly where you're supposed to bite. A strong musky smell radiates from the side of his neck and you decide to sink your teeth in until you break skin. When you do, he sighs happily at the feeling of your admittedly dull teeth (in comparison to his) in his neck.

“Mate,” he purrs.

You pull away when you can tell he's satisfied. He pulls you in for another kiss, tasting some of his blood on your tongue. He doesn't notice your fingers traveling to the bottle of lube on the bed and pumping some onto your fingers. He does notice when you start to rub around where you're not supposed to.

“Hey! What are you doing, meow?!” Tomura says, squirming at the strange new sensation.

When you find your mark and circle his asshole, any objections he just made the in the past. When he feels your finger begin to sink into his tight hole, he sighs happily. He isn't supposed to be the one getting penetrated, but he can't help how much he loves the feeling of your finger wiggling around inside of him.

When you add in another finger, he meows happily, grinding on your fingers. All this pleasure without the pain, what has he done to deserve this? To deserve you? Tomura’s back arches as he moves his hips; he can feel himself coming to a different kind of climax, but you pull away right when he's on the edge.

He looks up at you with pleading eyes and trembling thighs. He sees you putting that strange liquid on something much larger and gulps. He feels his asshole gape around nothing, waiting for something to fill it up.

“Is that going inside me, meow?” he asks nervously.

“It won't hurt,” you say, cupping his face, “i promise,”

Tomura gulps but nods. He trusts you. When the head of the dildo pushes into him he's tense and panting already.

“You have to relax,” you whisper in his ear, “be a good boy and relax,”

He tries, letting the nervous knot in his stomach untangle. His breathing slows as you push in more of the dildo. It starts to feel good, having you in some of him, and it's even better when the head of the dildo hits a spot that makes him mewl. He wraps his arms around your neck and pulls you down to him, causing you to poke his prostate again.

He moans and buries his face in your neck, purring loudly. You start to move your hips at an agonizingly slow pace. You worm your arms under him and hold him close while you help him adjust. He's planting and mewling happily.

“Love you,” he moans, “I love you so much y/n,”

“I love you too, Tomura,” you whisper, kissing the shell of his ear.

“It's so good,” he groans, “you're amazing meow. The perfect mate,”

“Yeah?” you say, too focused to respond.

He nods, “the best ever,”

You keep thrusting, speeding up just a bit. That makes Tomura yelp happily. His tongue lolls out as he smiles. There's not one thought behind those beautiful red eyes—just pure pleasure. It's taking over his entire body and he can't help but meow happily.

He likes to think of himself as more refined than most hybrids. More human, but all he can think of now is how wonderful being your little kitty is.

“I'm gonna cum,” he whimpers, “gonna cum, meow”

His dick quivers, and his asshole clenches as cum spurts out of him, but it's still not enough. To satiate his desires, he needs to be inside of you when he cums. When you pull out of him slowly and remove the strap on, he bites the bullet and plunges into you, ignoring the pain that makes him sob and absolutely hammers into you.

You're helpless underneath him as he has his way with you. You can't deny how good he feels inside of you. Tomura hates how long he's lasting. He needs to get this over with, although having you cum on his cock would be pretty nice. When he feels you worm your fingers down to your clit he starts to be thankful he hasn't lost his mind and cum yet.

That look on your face makes him so happy. He wants you to be happy. He wants you to cum, so he holds out until you milk his cock with your cunt. And when he lets go it's heavenly. The itch has been scratched, and he collapses on top of you, purring as his tail twitches. You scratch behind his ears to help him get some much-needed rest.

It works nearly immediately, and your sweet kitty is asleep in mere minutes. You love Tomura more than you can put into words, and he loves his pretty little mate. His adorable little y/n.

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hohoz · 3 years

Text

The ones that suffer the most

I wanted to talk about this for a long time.

I’m a Resident evil addicted, I finished almost every RE game released and I must say that Capcom made some poor choices regarding Jill and Chris, they are EASILY the most mistreated characters in RE Franchise.

But let’s explain why is that:

Jill and Chris are survivors, they had to survive in a mansion with a lot of puzzles and zombies, while looking for items that could help them to progress and find a way to reach Brad.

When they arrive at STARS Office, they are revolted that Umbrella did all that under their noses and innocents were dying because of that and they explained EVERYTHING in a report - but Irons made that go away.

In the ORIGINAL RE3 we had this special file (Jill’s Diary)

August 7th Two weeks have passed since that day. My wounds have been healed, but I just can't forget it. For most people, it's history now. But for me, whenever I close my eyes, it all comes back clearly. Zombies eating people's flesh and the screams of my teammates dying. No, the wounds in my heart are not healed yet...

August 13th Chris has been causing a lot of trouble recently. What's with him? He seldom talks to the other police members and is constantly irritated. The other day, he punched Elran of the Boy's Crime department just for accidentally splashing Chris's face with coffee. I immediately stopped Chris, but when he saw me he just gave me a wink and walked away. I wonder what happened to him...

August 15th Midnight. Chris, who has been on a leave of absence for a "vacation," called me so I visited his apartment. As soon as I walked into his room, he showed me a couple of pieces of paper. They were part of a virus research report entitled as simply as "G". Then Chris told me that, "The nightmare still continues." He went on to say that, "It's not over yet." Ever since that day, he has been fighting all by himself without rest, without even telling me.

August 24th Chris left the town today to go to Europe. Barry told me that he would send his family to Canada and then he would follow Chris. I decided to remain in Raccoon City for a while because I know that the research facility in this city will be very important to this entire case. In a month or so, I'll be joining with them somewhere in Europe. That's when my real battle begins...

For some weird reason this file isn’t available in RE3 Remake.

But ok, here we see that Chris was doing some investigation - in the RE2RMK you could see this letter that Chris left in a way that normal people wouldn't understand - the only thing that Claire says is that “doesnt look like him” but how normies would understand what Chris is like is he is not well represented in media ??????????????????

And Jill had all the detective work in her wall.

So far so good - we understand the basics about them - they are Special police force, the elite, they had a traumatic experience and they survived to tell the story.

Some problems until now:

Jill had a MAJOR personality change in RE3 RMK- I honestly like most of that, she is a badass in the originals and she is a badass in the rmk but I still dislike the fact that she swears all the time (specially because in RE1, RE Rev, RE5 she doesn't do that)

We can tell a lot about her personality just looking at her room, but I still miss some stuff (I had expectations - so this is not a real problem. but still) like a Vinyl player (since she is probably into classical music), some letters from her father so new players can understand her origin and why is she so good in lockpicking and more about her dog (she had a pic in the original that could’ve been her boyfriend but it was replaced by a dog in RE2 rmk but in RE3 Rmk there in no dog)

Okay - after you finish the game the only thing we see is this:

In my opinion this is Chris since he is always associated with Green colors while Jill is associated with blue.

So my speculation here is that she found him while in the original we had this:

This is not a major chance but still is important (lore of course - duh) but the problem here is that while Jill is looking for him - Code Veronica is happening.

So I can only assume two things, they did not show him because they DON’T HAVE A FACE FOR HIM or I am wrong and that is Jill, but if that is Jill so why there is no decent epilogue like the original ?

Okay, now we are arriving in the real trouble area

I will do RE5 first and the Wii and Rev1 (even tho those two comes first in the lore)

RESIDENT EVIL 5

So before the game was release we had some propaganda, including this:

So have in mind that Jill was dead, I thought that she died and RE5 would explain that shit.

But in the beginning we see that Chris is looking for her and have in mind that Chris HAD A MAJOR CHANCE IN HIS APPEARANCE, and I’m not talking about his muscles.

I will not address Chris in CV since he was good in that game but I the team that made CV also made the original, it had CONSISTENCE.

Here we have Chris, he’s THE classical american soldier protagonist from Hollywood in the 80′s/90′s and he had some omage to TOPGUN

He also shares some traits with his sister

A major trait here is that HE HAS BLUE EYES, typical good looking soldier from US.

and now let’s have a look at Chris in RE5...

Yeah... I still hate this face even tho I love his Character in this game, this ugly a** monkey looking mf and he had a lot of steroids

So we have some lore to him in RE5, Jill and Chris went to a mansion looking for Spencer (one of the fathers of Umbrella and the one that was behind project Wesker, he wanted to do this Virus so he could live forever, so RE has a good lore, it’s not just about zombies) but when they found him, he was dead and Wesker was by his side, in a fight Jill sacrificed herself to save Chris’s life.

Chris started doing mission after mission because her body was never found, and he made a name for himself, he became a ‘legend’ inside BSAA and you can see that in the beginning of RE5.

The reason behind the muscles was probably to fight Wesker mano to mano but still is not well made, it really felt weird playing for the first time.

So now we have a problem here, there is thing that you use in a narrative that is to make someone strong af powerless, and they did that to Jill. (a good example of this is in TWD- Ricky is a fucking legend and Negan made him powerless in the face of a event)

Jill was used in a Boss fight and that is it... She is not in the game as a character, she is being manipulated and her whole design was changed, she looks like Nina from Tekken. WTF. - BTW, the fact that Wesker had mind control over her created 1000 fics of sex

So that is it, my main problem here isnt Jill itself, but it’s the fact that they used her character as a boss even tho she is the heroine, she never appears in RE lore again until some guy inside Capcom said “Well people are asking about Jill so let’s place a file in Rev2 saying that she is in rehab”

The only time that she appears again is in a 3DS NINTENDO ONLY game, it felt that Capcom simply don’t care about her character.

By the way Revelations 1 is a great game and was adaptable some years later for PC and consoles

But you think that this is bad, wait until we arrive at RESIDENT EVIL 6

When I learned that Jill was not in RE6 I was mad... But after I played that game I said “thank you God” that game was bad, transformers kind of bad, it had bad writing, the lore was all over the place and Chris was the one that suffered the most in this game.

He was responsible for the death of an entire squad, suffered amnesia and people still wanted him in the command

THEY MADE HIM AN ALCOHOLIC

The golden boy of BSAA reduced to THIS.

By the way, the director said that HE WANTED TO KILL CHRIS IN THIS GAME to SUBVERT EXPECTATIONS - so if you liked Piers now that he died only because of that.

So now let’s analyse what we know:

The first 2 main characters are not well represented in media until RE6, they don’t know how to re introduce Jill in the games and Chris was reduced to a normal guy at a Russian bar;

But it gets worse...

Capcom LOVE Leon, we know that. he is always the hero, he is the protagonist in almost every movie and he is always the cool guy so when he get’s a new model, he looks like this:

But When Chris get’s a new face he look like this:

WHO DAFUQ ARE U, no offense to the model but he has NEGATIVE JAW LINE.

And still he doesn't look like Claire’s brother, there is no blue/green eyes and he looks younger that he was in 6 (and 6 still uses that ugly character model)

But let’s go in the lore- we HAVE 0 info on Jill in RE6 / RE7 and no sight of her in RE8

And speaking of which, they tried to make Chris the bad guy in the trailer so when we play we see “Ohhhh he was not the bad guy, that happened and that is why he did that”

But still...

If they are going to do that to his character don’t use this character, shit ! Do something with that Wesker’s son that made 0 sense in RE6 but leave Chris out of this - it really feels that they simply don’t know how to treat him right

And you may think that I may be complaining a lot because of his appearance

But this is him in RE8

(to me this is some random dude from Russia)

And this is him in RE:Verse (that is going to be release TOGETHER)

So this tells me that they have 0 clue of how to handle his looks

Jill got RE3Rmk but it felt like a cheap game compared to RE2Rmk where the original RE3 was SO MUCH BETTER

And this is bad because there are so many new fans joining the fandom only to see 2 great characters suffering from poor director’s choices.

I’m sorry about this rant, if you like Chris face and looks its okay, really, but dont tell me that Chris from 5/6/8 is the same from 1/CV and if you think im wrong about Jill its fine, but she is an amazing character that could have so much more impact in RE universe (I mean, she never even appeared in a RE movie - animations)

But it’s sad to see so many characters that receive good representation in media and good games/lore while Jill get’s almost none and Chris is handled like random face guy.

I was going to talk a little bit more about Rev 1 and RE Umbrella Chronicles but there is no need since Im mad right now and it seems that Capcom has 0 interest in making Code Veronica and Umbrella’s fall after that since their fav boy Leon need a rmk in RE4 even tho RE4 is not that old.

Bonus:

Fun fact: Chris served in the Air force, so yeah, to me even Tom Cruise looks more like Chris than Chris from the games

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thatbrownb1tch · 3 years

Note

I have a post TWK prompt Jude meets her mother’s wealthy parents and they try to set her up for an arranged marriage, And Cardan rescues her

Edit:

I definitely did not base everything off of Gilmore Girls.

“We have grandparents?” Anger fumed through me while Taryn stood in shock. “And you chose to keep this a secret for how long?”

“Jude, I didn’t tell you for many reasons but now that you seem to be, well nearing the end of your peak you must get some family if you’re not willing to settle down,” Madoc leaned back into his chair.

“What do you mean settle down? What? I’d marry some random monster like Locke? I’d rather die than ever marry anyone that I don’t care about,” I spoke the truth right now. Something I rarely did with Madoc.

“Taryn?” He moved off of me trying to figure out what his other daughter was feeling. It took a lot to get me to agree to meet with Madoc but it was even more difficult to get me to be in here with Taryn. I’m only doing it in case they try to kill Cardan or something but right now it doesn’t look like it.

“Where do they live?” Taryn finally spoke.

“Right outside Elfhame, in a large house by the country. They have many connections and you can easily go back and forth in case you’d like to form a connection which I’d rather you not do,” For someone so against us meeting them he’s telling us an awful lot about it. “Look, if you guys want you can see them, but you don’t need to, I was just doing my job,” He stood and began to make his way out of the room.

“You’re a little too late,” I called after him.

“At least he told us,” It’s typical of Taryn to do that. Agree with the one who caused us the most pain. This is exactly why she’s known as the optimist and why I’m the pessimist.

“Wow! It’s so great that he finally told us! Madoc is such a good person because he told us about our only biological family still alive that can possibly help up a decade after he kidnapped us!” Sarcasm erupted, it’s something I try not to do with her but right now she was really getting on my nerves.

“Jude,” She began, “I’m sorry. I understand why you’re so angry but please, let’s go see them.”

I narrowed my eyes, “you can go see them. But I’m not ruining their lives on top of what they already went through.”

“Excuse me?” Was she really this stupid?

“Don’t be so naive. They obviously had to go through the death of their daughter after she ran away. What do you think they went through after mom came here? And then after like 30 years we show up at their doorstep claiming to be their daughter’s kids? They probably haven’t even gotten over her death. Maybe you didn’t love our parents like me but I still mourn them,” I knew the last part wasn’t needed but sometimes she really made me feel like that. Taryn moved on so much faster. Vivi remembered them very vividly and had a good reason because of that but I never did. They just said I was being difficult for no reason when I was forced to live among monsters after I saw my own mother and father die by the hands of the man who’s been taking care of me.

“You really think that? I hope you know that I grieve them just like you and Vivi do. The only difference is I can hide it better unlike you two. Jude, deal with it. You’re not the only one with traumatic events who’s empathetic towards other people who lost their family. Don’t you think it’d make them feel better to know that they still have a piece of mom left?” How could she be so optimistic? If I was in their place I’d wish to forget everything, I’d wish to die in peace knowing that no one else would need to go through the pain I felt. Maybe something was just wrong with me.

“Fine, I’ll go but if everything goes wrong don’t blame me.”

She smiled sweetly, “Thank you.”

Vivi drove us to mom’s parent’s house. Well, technically our grandparents but I’m not sure if it’s okay to call them that yet. Vivi had called them earlier and made sure they knew we were coming, she said they’re sweet.

“Alright, we’re here,” Vivi didn’t leave the car, she didn’t follow us to the doorstep. She was related to them yet she didn’t come with us.

“Are you not coming?” I asked.

“Why? You guys deserve an actual family, I don’t want to see any more. They’ll just ruin my life again,” Every word she spoke made me feel more normal. I didn’t want more people to interfere when I was doing what I wanted. I was so close to getting a higher place on court.

“Alright then, Jude we better get going,” Taryn pushed us away from the car before I changed my mind. The house was gigantic, it was like a mansion, much bigger than a regular family-sized house. It was like Locke’s estate but more homely. It had a beautiful garden with a large driveway. It was in an ‘u’ shape. The house looked newer than the estates in Elfhame but it was still very grand and kept well for its age. I heard that most houses get very old here and start to crack but this one was taken care of.

“I don’t want to go,” I stated flatly as we reached the front doors. The door has a gold knob with a glass window but there were designs on it to keep people from outside to look inside. It was like a privacy barrier but it worked very well because I didn’t see the owners my grandparents walk up to the door and open it. I jumped a little, I wasn’t expecting that but Taryn was very ready with her gigantic smile.

“Hello girls!” The woman grinned widely while looking between the two of us. It was as if she was picking apart everything in our face and bodies, but we were identical so I’m not sure why her head went back and forth.

“Come in, please,” The man pushed his wife away a little and welcomed us inside. He was tall, and wore spectacles. They had a thin metal frame and were small for his face. They were circle shaped and he wore them a little done on his nose, it definitely made him look old. The woman had a short blackish Gray shirt and she wore a red pantsuit.

“Thank you,” Taryn was the first to speak between us and I could tell this was how most of the trip would end up going. They’d ask a question and Taryn would answer, and I’d just nod along. And like usual, I was completely right, an hour in and somehow the only thing I said was “thank you”. The man had introduced himself as Richard and the woman had said her name was Emily. They seemed like lovely people who wanted to get to know their grandchildren but we were all definitely uncomfortable and I was definitely a huge reason behind it.

“So, Jude, how are you?” Emily said it directly to me so Taryn couldn’t answer for me.

“I’m fine, how are you?” I would’ve used her name but I wasn’t sure if she’d like that.

“I’m great, so what are you two doing? School? I assume you’re around 17?”

“Uh, well I did go to school,” I started not sure how to explain to her that my foster father killed the prince during his coronation which made him a traitor and then the person who I thought cared about me actually loved my sister. Then, I made my enemy the king so that my little brother wouldn’t need to be on the throne and so that my foster father wouldn’t be given any power and now I’m the high king’s seneschal.

“We did but we graduated,” Taryn interrupts us so that I wouldn’t say anything stupid. That’s a great way to put it.

“That’s nice, so are you guys going to college?” Richard asked.

“Yes, well not exactly but we have jobs,” Another lie. Taryn is really going all out today with the lies.

“Is college even a thing there?” Emily looked at me.

“Where?” I wasn’t sure if they knew about Faerie but I couldn’t risk it.

“That place, the one which stole our daughter from us, the one which caused her death,” Emily said in such a sweet voice you wouldn’t be able to feel her rage unless you were looking directly at her eyes.

“Yes, we live there. College isn’t a thing and honestly the only thing we can do is either become a knight, a member of the court, or just get married,” I explained.

“So where are you two on the list? I’ve heard that girls get married around your age and we have a couple of boys that we’d love to set you two up with. They can also get you to very high places on the list, almost near the top with the king,” Richard jumped in.

“Well, you can’t help Taryn, she’s already found a place,” I felt their eyes on me and I had to get it off.

“Oh! Are you-?” Emily began.

“I’m betrothed,” Taryn finished with a glare that was shot in my direction.

“That’s great! Is he a good man? Will you be protected? Do you truly love him?” A ton of questions spilled out of Emily and all I could see in her face was grief. She missed mom and all of her questions gave away her intentions. She wanted to make sure we were safe, she wanted to make sure we weren’t going to make the same mistakes. I don’t think they’re that bad anymore. They’re trying to save me from Faerie. Something that only one other person has done and that’s Vivi.

“Yes, I really do. He makes me feel like I’m flying,” She gushed.

“Well that’s great, but please be careful, think it over before you say ‘I do’,” Richard looked at her sternly.

“I will, I promise,” Taryn said looking down at her hand where a small gold ring laid on her ring finger.

“What about you dear?” Emily’s attention turned back to me. Now, I really don’t have anymore saves.

“I’m not planning on marrying anyone there,” I heard a snort come from Taryn but moved on. I could tell she was thinking about my relationship with Cardan which was very simple. “I have a place in the court, I’m not sure for how long I can secure it but I’m happy with where I am,” I didn’t want to give too much away.

“Really? Are you a knight?” Richard leaned forward interested, to know how I got a place without a mans

“No,” I laughed, it was my dream but I was definitely not a knight and I’m not sure if I could be trusted to be a knight anymore. Cardan would choose me to be a part of his personal guard just to annoy me and I’d probably end up going to the tower of forgetting to kill him. “I’m actually connected to the high King,” I wasn’t sure how much I could say but my wording was really bad and I could tell the second they left my mouth. Richard looked surprised while Emily looked disgusted for a split second. She covered it up but it was there. “Oh! No, not like that! I am definitely not connected to him like that! I’m just his seneschal,” I scramble to get the words out.

“Oh, that’s a lot better,” Richard recovers a lot faster than Emily. “Alright, well it is time for me to get back to work but Emily, you’ll be here with the girls?”

“Yes, don’t worry I’ll still be here and if you guys do decide to leave, please do think of coming here,” Emily does seem very sweet and honestly it’d be a lot better to live here than in the tiny apartment with Vivi and Heather, oh and of course Oak.

“Yes, don’t worry if I ever do plan on leaving I know where I’m going,” I grinned hoping they know that I’m trying to accept them. Taryn doesn’t say a word, it’s obvious she doesn’t like them. You couldn’t tell at first but now she’s not being as friendly. Maybe because of the way they talked about her marriage but I’d say the exact same thing if we were still on better terms but now we barely even acknowledge each other.

“Now, Jude, I really do think we could set you up with someone. We could at least throw you a coming out party! Oh, please Jude! It was my favorite thing to do with your mother! Please?” She seemed so excited and I know I should’ve said no but what’s the worst that could happen? I’d just say I’m better off with no one and they of all people should understand that.

“Okay, I’ll do it.”

“What?” Taryn asked, not expecting that.

“Great! Alright I’ll get started on it and you two should sleep here for the night, tomorrow evening you will have the best party ever!” Emily stood up excitedly as a maid came in to show us to our rooms.

“Actually I have to go home. Locke is expecting me,” Taryn escaped, leaving me alone. Right before I was planning on going to sleep a short lady walked inside. She had a straight cut that went up to her chin and she had black cat-eye glasses on.

“Hello, stand up straight please,” There was a hint of Russian in her accent. She walked up to me and began to measure me. My waist, my hips, my bust, she measured every curve on my body. “That’ll be all, a dress will be ready for you tomorrow,”

“Thanks,” I didn’t understand exactly what happened but I think I have a dress now. It was a sleepless night, thoughts filled my head but it wasn’t the worst night of sleep due to the bed I had. I don’t even have anything to compare it to. Somehow I didn’t think about Cardan once throughout the trip. I was afraid of leaving for a day like this, I told him I may be out for up to a couple of days since I kind of wanted to stay with Vivi and Oak for a day but I didn’t realize that I would like Emily and Richard so much that I’d be okay with spending a night.

The party started out great, over time the garden was filled with men who all fought to get to know me. I didn’t enjoy the fact that I was actually missing Cardan right now. Usually right now he’d say something to give me something to overthink, laugh, or mostly panic about but right now I was stuck with a bunch of boys who all wanted my hand. As if they really expected me to choose and on top of it, Emily was very keen on me choosing. She had told me she had about 5 batches so I can have a party each night of the week. It wasn’t that I didn’t like her or anything but, I just could not deal with a room filled with rich people like this. I know I’m supposed to be happy that there’s a room full of people ready to marry me at any second but right now all I wanted to do was run all the way back to the palace. To bicker with Cardan and fight with Madoc at council meetings. I finally found an empty area , a couch in the corner of the garden, somehow no one was to be found. I sat as politely as I could incase anyone was watching but I ended up leaning back and closing my eyes trying to process every person who’s introduced themself. Within minutes later I felt a thud next to me on the couch, I tried my best not to groan and turned my head. I attempted to have a sweet smile but I’m pretty sure it was a glare from the moment I looked over.

“Why the face?” The boy had a sly grin on his face as my eyes widened.

“Cardan!” I hissed. “What are you doing here?” How did he even know about this party?

“Taryn told Locke and Locke told me about it,” He replied coolly while he took a bite

out of something he was holding.

“Who’s at the throne? Oh my god, is it Madoc? He’s going to kill everyone,” I started to panic thinking about what was happening in Elfhame with Cardan and I back here.

“Don’t worry Lo-“

I cut him off, “Locke! You put Locke in charge? He’s going to kill everyone and lock us out!” I almost stood up with even more panic spread throughout me. At least Madoc was logical, Locke thinks everything is a stupid game.

“Locke called for the court of shadows and now they’re doing whatever it is that you do,” Cardan finished.

I took a deep breath, “Oh thank God.”

“So, what did you do to get a party for yourself? I doubt you’re actually planning on choosing someone,” I could tell he didn’t like the idea of me marrying someone just for the sake of it.

“After Locke, I don’t think I’ll ever rush into love at all,” I forgot who I was talking to for a second, I let my guard down stupidly. I could tell Cardan didn’t like the fact that I said Locke but he let me continue before I stopped talking, “I’m just doing this because they miss my mother and Em- she pleaded. How could I refuse a stupid party that caused her more excitement than to know that she had a piece of her daughter left.”

He smirked, “Well, I know something that’d cause her even more excitement.”

“What?” I could already tell this would end with a dirty joke.

“Oh, don’t be like that. I was just going to say that if you chose me, you could pretend you’d live with me for a while,” His idea was great except for the fact that she’d freak out to know that I planned on running away with a boy that she doesn’t even know.

“I think she’d have a heart attack.”

He snorted, “Well, we won’t know until we do it.”

“Cardan!” I gasped.

“Also, who’s ‘she’?” I realized I never actually explained to him who my grandparents were.

“The woman who gave birth to my mom.”

“So ‘he’ is the dad who caused his wife pleasure and pain so that your mother would come out of ‘she’?” He could make even the stupidest things sexual.

“Yes Cardan, please talk about the way that my mom was conceived. Please, I’d love to know more,” sarcasm filled my voice.

“I’d love to but ‘she’, is coming down here’,” my heart stopped for a second. Was she going to recognize him? He did glamour himself so hopefully she wouldn’t, and she probably didn’t know how the new king looked anyway.

“I see you’ve made a friend,” Emily winked at me.

“Yes, I did, but I think it’s time w-“ I stop myself quickly, “I go back home.” I smile as naturally as I can but I can tell it looks too artificial.

“Yes, well I’d like to get to know him a bit before you go,” Emily looks at him. “Have we met before?” She’s catching on.

“I’m not sure, maybe you knew my father?” Cardan played along but maybe he wasn’t. He sounded serious, was he actually asking my mortal grandmother whether or not she knew the old high king?

“Where’s Richard?” I blurted, hoping that she doesn’t figure out who Cardan is.

“Yes, I’m not sure where he is, but Jude. If you ever do feel comfortable, I’d love for you to call me your grandmother. And the same goes for Richard,” This was it. The conversation I least wanted to have and on top of it we were doing it in front of the boy I hate.

“Well, I hope you wouldn’t be calling him grandmother,” His laugh echoed through my body.

“Oh Yes! My wording was not that great,” Emily began to laugh. I’m surprised she didn’t snap at him but again, I think I’m just one who has no filter when it comes to Cardan.

“Emily, dear. Oh, hello. Jude, did you find someone interesting?” Richard inquired as he walked up to the trio.

“Yes, I did, now I really must get going,” I just wanted to leave and Cardan was not helping at all. I glared at him hoping he’d catch the hint.

“Well, it was great meeting you two but, I too must get going and well, I would just love to give Jude a ride back to her house,” Cardan stood up.

“Jude, will have to go her own way,” Emily interrupted. I wasn’t sure whether or not these people knew I was from Faerie.

“Yes, I hope I can see you another time,” I knew if I didn’t go with him I’d be stuck here for at least another day. My eyes burned hoping he’d come up with something else, anything else.

“I don’t think you understand, I know of Jude’s home very well and am offering to take her with me. I’d love to see where she live as I live there too,” Cardan said again. His voice was commanding, just like how it is when he’s in the court.

“Y-yes, of course, you may definitely take her with you,” Richard stammered. He was definitely afraid but I’m not sure what he was afraid of. I looked over and Cardan looked like his normal glamoured self. Emily stood there, as if she was struck by lightning.

“Emily, you’ll walk them out?” Richard looked over to his frozen wife.

“Yes,” She began to walk next to me while Cardan was a step in front of me. Once we reached the front door I began to say goodbye. I hugged her first, I kissed her lightly on her cheek as I saw everyone else do. She did the same to me but lingered a little longer. She whispered into my ear, “You could’ve just said no. You did not need to drag him here to save yourself. The next time you come here, I expect you to leave him there.” Her words were stern and I could tell she wasn’t joking around. She was right, I could’ve just said no but I did not bring him here. He came himself but there was no point in arguing. I wasn’t sure if she knew he was king but I could tell they knew he wasn’t mortal.

“Good bye,” Emily said quietly as we began to step outside the door, “and farewell, your majesty.” The last part made me freeze for a second. Cardan kept moving but he grabbed my arm quickly. Emily definitely saw it, she knew she was right.

“What did you do?” I asked once we were out of sigh.

“Nothing, just unglamored myself for

a second so they saw my crown,” Cardan shrugged as we continued to move.

“You did what?” I froze.

“Well, what did you want me to do?” He grabbed my arm again and forced me to start walking again.

“Anything other than that!” I couldn’t believe him.

“Hey, you needed rescuing so I rescued you.” He brought me to the horse he came here on.

“Thank you,” I said as I threw myself over it.

“You’re welcome, just make sure the next time you plan on getting married,” I turned my head to look at him as he talked, “Make sure it’s to me.” And with that, we started. I didn’t say a word on the the ride back not sure whether or not he was joking. But even if he wasn’t, it didn’t matter because that’s not my priority. We reached Elfhame by dawn and I made a decision. That was the first and last time I’d ever go back to their house.

#jurdan #jude and cardan fanfic #cardan greenbriar #the queen of nothing #jude duarte #the wicked king #the cruel prince #jurdan fanfic

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sprstories · 3 years

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could I possibly get some platonic scriptliss/tess ,,,, maybe an au where tess is able to be saved ? or at least is able to control 1x1x1x1 a bit better

but it's up to you what you want to write !! :D

For Tess, bringing (or rather summoning) a demon into his home was definitely a new way of life, considering that now he would have to take care of the permanently guest. Because yes, apparently the demon ironically did not know how to return to hell.

Ok, you can't blame Scriptliss for being summoned at a young age and considering that the chances of someone summoning a young demon were low, no one bothered to teach him the basics, at least not now.

Now, it wasn't like Scriptliss was a child either, he was a teenager, yes, but he was still a minor, maybe he's a year younger than Tess?

Anyway, never mind, he was going to take care of Scriptliss now, it was his responsibility now that he had permanently separated him from his family (if he had any).

The first days were not very comfortable, before he could calm the demon and not let him cry all day, but it was still uncomfortable, and more uncomfortable was the moment when he found him in the fireplace... sitting on the fire.

Demons cannot be burned with normal fire, and he deduced that the reason he sat there was because he got used to warmer places.

Many times he tried to get the boy out of there, all attempts with the same results, being scratched (and almost burned) by the demon with a tendency to be a cat.

And if Tess tried to speak with him, the ribbon-tail demon ignored him, how rude, but understandable, have a nice warmer day Script!

But he was getting tired of that, Scriptliss knew how to throw all his sanity and work to the trash, little by little he began to get tired of his stoic and indifferent attitude, he felt hated, and he did not like to be hated.

On the part of Scriptliss, he couldn't do anything, he was trapped, he had nowhere to go, nor would the robloxian with violet hair let him go anywhere, he felt... kidnapped.

He didn't even sleep at night, he was afraid of being attacked from behind. Every day he was more tired, and that meant more irritability and aggressiveness against the "human".

He also felt fear running down his back, fear of dying, many rumors said that demons died faster on the surface than in hell, no demon could confirm it, perhaps it is why those who tried to confirm it died in the attempt?

He wanted to cry, never thought of dying at a young age.

then a day, in that dysfunctional environment, the, presumably older, finally faced his guest from hell.

— We need to talk. — The demon growled, turning his back on him. Tess might well have prevented that if it weren't for Scriptliss being engulfed in layers of fire that could severely burn him. More tired than everything, he began to speak. — Do you hate me, right? i.. i will not hurt you, i swear. — He waited for response, but nothing came from the demon's mouth. — Listen, i know i probably.. made a huge mistake summoning you, you can't go back to hell, that's sad yeah, but... you can give this world a little chance? —.

— I don't want you to be here, with me. Go away. —.

His voice felt... hurt, with a little fear, it was actually the first time in days that the bookmark one spoke. But that didn't really matter to Tess, honestly, he just wanted to figure things out and if possible, have a new friend so he wouldn't feel so alone.

It sounds selfish, but who knows, maybe and Tess is the first social interaction Scriptliss had in his life, he was convinced that he could show him the world and see the beauties in the surface.

— In case you haven't noticed, this is my house, and you can't kick me out of the room just because you want to be alone. — Tess was getting more and more angry.

— I want to be alone because you intimidate me and scare me, and I don't want to see you, and you're ugly and i hate you... and.. and.. — Apparently he had no other words to express his displeasure. — and i can't leave this fireplace, i need to be warmer. —.

— I see, and if I turned off this fireplace ... would you talk to me? —.

Then Scriptliss turned more scared than ever, seeing the alchemist with one hand on a lever, firmly stroking the handle of the lever, threatening to put out his fire.

— WAIT NO, NO, DON'T TURN OFF THE FIRE. FINE, I WILL TALK TO YOU. —.

And that scared look he gave... made the alchemist wish he had swallowed those words.

Now all that Tess anger turned to slight sadness and shame, he regretted having to threaten Scriptliss to get his words.

— Ok, i'm sorry for that. — Tess spoke, ashamed. — but, tell me now, "Script". Why do you find me scary? —.

Scriptliss looked at the ground, helpless, and half astonished that the purple haired boy remembers his name (because Scriptliss honestly did not remember his partner's name).

— To begin with, you kidnapped me, or so I feel, I feel locked up and it's your fault, to be honest. — Script made a serious grin. — second, I don't trust you much, I don't know if you could stab me in the back or something like that. And third, I literally don't know you, I don't remember your name, and it's awkward now to adjust to living with a stranger. —.

And there it was, the bitter truth, the ugly thought about his person, and the worst thing was that it was true.

Tess waited to hear simple words, they weren't ready to savor THAT truth. The Robloxian's hand scratched lightly against his own hair, nervous.

— Yes, I see how it is, actually... i didn't expect to leave you with me until I realized that you couldn't go back to hell, I figured that if I let you go, you'd get in troubleand the mental fault would be mine. — Scriptliss looked at him seriously, recording those words that would stay like fire in his mind. — I'm sorry that you felt so locked up, I never really had a guest at my house and I didn't know where to leave you, plus you... always stayed there... in the fire .. looking at me as if you were a cat, a very aggressive one.

Tess let out a small laugh, which inevitably rubbed off on Scriptliss by imagining himself as a cat.

— Look, the point is, I understand that you distrust me and do not feel free... if you want you can go now. The door is here, unlocked. —.

The crimson widened his eyes, apparently now he was free, and might feel good, if not for a little problem.

Where would he go now?

He wanted freedom, but at the same time he was afraid to go to the outside world, he felt locked up, but somehow safe.

And the alchemist was right, if he showed himself to the world as a demon, he could possibly cause many disasters.

Had a great mental dilemma, to leave or not to leave? it was something so simple and complex to assimilate.

He looked at his surroundings, now that he noticed it, never noticed that staying there was the best idea, he always thought about leaving, but leaving meant revealing himself against the world.

And inside... at least he had a fireplace and a strange alchemist who swore to protect him. Besides, that guy already explained WHY he didn't want to let him go.

— Don't you want to leave? I am not saying that you stay here, if it is more comfortable for you to get away from this place, I accept it. —.

Scriptliss looked at him with pity, now he felt a little bad for having treated him horrible, Tess only wanted to help him, how ungrateful he was!

— I... i... I will stay here. — Then he received a surprised look, it seemed that Tess's soul went out for such an answer, but in a few seconds, that look turned into a big and bright smile, that only confirmed that... Tess was actually a good boy. — Don't look at me like that, i'm staying here just because i need the fireplace. —.

Tess nodded, extending his hand to his new supposed friend. But then he came to his senses and pulled his hand away before gets burned, he really had to get him out of there without scaring Script.

— Look, don't be scared, but I need to put out the fireplace. —Scriptliss pouted. — Don't look at me like that, you're not going to stay there forever, besides, if you want to get used to this new life, you'll have to take the first step.

But scriptliss could no longer repent, he had signed his sentence, his new life, he would have to get used to the surface temperature, and depend on that alchemist.

— ... Fine. —.

Before Tess could put out the fire, the demon jumped out of the fireplace causing his temperature to drop and the fire to rise.

And now that he saw him well and standing on his two legs, he noticed that... they did not have much difference in height, perhaps and even Script passed him by an inch or two.

It was inevitable that the demon would start to shiver from the sudden temperature change, he felt frozen. And it was noticed by the Robloxian.

— Uh, look, you can lie on that sofa, that one, the one in front of you, I'll bring you some blankets and a hot tea, okay? —.

Scriptliss nodded, leaning back and inevitably starting to feel drowsy, the effects of insomnia hitting him hard after three days without sleep.(Or just sleeping an hour each day).

As for Tess, he had several dilemmas in his head, now he would (officially) take charge of the demon until he gets used to it, that meant having to adapt him to the "real world" in a subtle way, but that wouldbe taken care of later, now his duty It was making the devil comfortable, he deserved it, you see.

He had to hide it from the world until he got over his fears from the outside, he was confident in bringing his "new friend" forward, he was not a normal robloxian, but he was a living being that was simply traumatized by ridiculous stories from hell.

Tess returned to the living room, and was not surprised to find Scriptliss asleep on his sofa, it was to be expected, for something he did not make the tea first.

He rolled the crimson gently over the fabrics and let the heat of the fire embrace him. That would definitely calm him down.

He stared at it for a while, many thoughts invaded his mind, to tell the truth, he was somewhat excited and nervous about the unexpected turn that his life took, who knows, maybe and in the future they will get along and have at leastone friendship or tolerance for each other.

A robloxian and a demon... friendship not very common to see, especially around here, but never impossible.

But, he really did see a bright future for both of them, and they would have it, didn't they?

...Tess, you should stop thinking about the future and focus on the present.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

Extra info: Scriptliss got sick. (Thanks Tess very cool).

#super paper roblox #spr #tess aract #scriptliss #i choose the first because i want wholesome stuff #and also i could connect this drabble with the other one #however if you want the other options you can tell me!#tw: death mention.. i think #you know i like to make past drabbles #but an AU thing.. isn't bad [Writes that down]

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keepyourpantsongohan · 3 years

Text

Ayesha Liveblogs Death Note

I’m watching this show specifically because of that text post that said, “Watch how quickly this one guy decides to be the worst person ever” and he has killed two people in the first ten minutes

Though 2 be fair he’s killing people to save people so it’s a trolley problem kind of thing for now

“In fact I’ve been waiting for you... Ryuk” ok weird flex Light but u do u

“You’re the first one to use to this extent in five days” WAIT DID HE MURDER ALL THOSE PEOPLE IN FIVE DAYS I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST LOOKING AT A LIST OH MY GOD??

“So there isn’t a price to using Death Note?” said Light, as if killing people is just a normal thing that we all do

Fhkjfhfkjb Ryuk really went ‘u used the book so we’re friends now’

I was wondering why the book was in English, and I guess that makes sense British and American imperialism really Did That

“I can write down the names of criminals, and slowly reduce the number of evil people” uhhhh doesn’t u being a Book Murderer also make you a criminal Light

“Human lives shouldn’t be taken so lightly” bah dum tss

Also I guess that revelation lasted about thirty seconds for you huh

Update from 15 seconds later: Even less than that

“I would create a world of earnest, kind humans” really because I don’t think places that allow the death penalty are generally nicer societies

It’s interesting that they use English in the classes and the notebook but the conversation at Interpol takes place in Japanese (despite the implied internationality and Ryuk’s aforementioned claim about English being most common)

Huh I won’t lie I do think it’s confusing that the main characters are L and Light, which also starts with L

“I am justice” I mean if anything this show just proves that no one should be allowed to use the death penalty on apprehended suspects in criminal justice cases ever

OH SHIT PLOT TWIST HIS DAD’S A COP (IT WAS IN THE TEXT POST I THINK BUT I FORGOT)

Wow this show is full of mind games already I guess I can see why like, crime show fans would dig it

“But I’m going to say this as your roommate” OH MY GOD THEY WERE ROOMMATES KJHRGKJHKJHG

Interesting that someone is following Light specifically already

I mean not to poke too many holes in your plan Light but wouldn’t it clash with your plan to become God if you die at like 35 or smth

“You’re already much more of a shinigami than they are” Ryuk said my friends are BORING I want to hang out with this MURDER TEEN

“I may not look it, but I’m pretty popular” Light is exactly the kind of guy who ends up in a true crime special where a bunch of people say he seemed like a nice, charismatic young man

Man this poor girl that Light brought on this date is going to be straight traumatized after this

I mean isn’t it MORE suspicious if someone dies around someone with direct ties to the police even if it’s not a heart attack

“You were indeed a brilliant FBI agent once, but now you’re my fiancée” kjhfkjhg WHAT FBI AGENTS CAN’T BE MARRIED

“Once we have a family, you’ll be so busy that you’ll forget that you were an agent” I’m not a fan of Raye Penber

What’s the point in killing Raye at all???? He told you he was part of a special investigation so clearly he’s not that suspicious of you

Light sure is bold to announce his Killing People Experiments in the middle of a busy sidewalk

Incredible that consistently no one notices Light’s increasingly threatening declarations????

Fjkfkfhk these five cops finding out their Hail Mary is this strange little goblin man,,,, wow

This woman has really pushed Light to the brink just by giving a fake name, I admire her tenacity

Cops wearing fake IDs really did not age well oh boy

SERIOUSLY HOW DOES NO ONE EVER HEAR LIGHT SAYING SUSPICIOUS THINGS IN PUBLIC THOROUGHFARES HE LITERALLY JUST SAID “I AM KIRA” AS A DETECTIVE WALKED BY, WHILE HE WAS TALKING TO SOMEONE HE KILLED IMMEDIATELY AFTER

Wow it really took only eight episodes for L to track Light as close as one of two families

“You have a wife and daughter, right?” “I know!” I mean..... not 2 be that guy but... cops

“To me, apples are like... Well, like cigarettes and liquor to humans” Vcvhcjhj every once in a while Ryuk says something that really tickles me

I know the word sociopath is kind of outdated but man does Light have actual interests outside of school or does he just do stuff to fill the void of his lack of interests (outside of murder)

JKHGKJHGKJHKJHG I cannot believe that this has turned into a fake classmate situation first of all 1) are you going to become friends and 2) How old are you Ryuzaki/L?

“Where is that rich kid from? And he’s even at the top of his class? What a jerk” honestly a mood

I DESPERATELY want Light’s mother or sister to overhear his evil cackling will someone finally eavesdrop on this god complex

“If I sit normally, my reasoning skills drop by 40%” weird flex but same

Sidenote: I can’t believe how many episodes of this show I already have watched

Ngl I was VERY shook that Mr. Yagami had a heart attack. Also does Light care if his family lives or dies or is he kind of neutral on the subject?

“If Kira is an ordinary person who gained this power, then he is a very unlucky person” Dad and L said ‘if u ARE Kira could you please stop murdering thank you <3′

Light really underestimated how much cops hate anyone who has killed a cop oops

OH SO IT’S NOT LIGHT I WAS WONDERING WHY HE HAD NOT MADE AN APPEARANCE THIS WHOLE EPISODE U MEAN THERE ARE TWO GUYS WITH THIS EXACT SAME IDEOLOGY AND PLAN? INCREDIBLE

Update from ten seconds later: Two people, I guess

Well this explains the girl in the short dress which serves as the Netflix thumbnail of this show I was wondering when she would show up

Also she sounds like she’s very young? Clearly Shinigami don’t have a minimum age of informed consent when it comes to their Murder Eyes Contract

Hahah I bet Light didn’t imagine that his petty and fucked up apple joke would bite him so quickly in the ass

Dhkjdhdkjhd Misa is so bold dropping her Death God deets in a video for anyone to see

“The way to kill a Shinigami, is to make them fall in love with a human” does this mean that Ryuk is going to fall in love with Light or Misa? Both would make me uncomfortable

Oh wild guess Misa became a Death Note Wielder through the Power of Unreciprocated Voyeuristic Love

“Yeah, I have a girlfriend now,” said Light, after a girl contacted him through a series of anonymous video tapes implicitly vowing to be his disciple

“No one could tell who he’s attached to if I’m with this many people” [20 seconds pass] “Found him!” HAHAHA the funniest part of this show is consistently watch Light going “got ‘em” before it immediately is revealed that he doesn’t got ‘em

Why is Light so incredibly searchable??? I think the only way people people could find my height online is if I happened to answer it for one of those Facebook note memes in 2007 lmaoooo

“There are many places that will go and sell your personal records” ah, data breaches; a problem that has not gotten any better in the last 15 years since this anime came out

HKJHFHKJFHF Light immediately jumping into fake-dating his weird disciple in front of his mom... what is this show

“Please make me your girlfriend” OH MY GOOOOOD

This is one of the weirdest romantic dynamics I’ve seen in recent memory but you know what? Whatever, at least it’s not Anxiety and Murder

“Does that mean I’ll have to deal with her until she dies?” Light is truly exuding some Ladybird Book of Dating Energy rn:

The fact that to kill L all Light had to do was get an obsessive girlfriend... astounding

Beautiful that it took Misa less than a week of knowing Light to ruin his whole 15 episode game plan and also life

“I think I may be Kira” Well this show keeps taking one escalation after another this is exhausting why can’t Light just be a normal person who found it, tried it out of interest in the occult, discovered he’d committed a horrible atrocity and then went to therapy for the rest of his life only to confess to Magical Murder on his deathbed while his family goes, ‘Wow, Grandpa’s crazy’

Does L not think that keeping three different people imprisoned for days on end will lead to some psychological repercussions for him

FOR WEEKS ON END????? OH MY GOD???? The fuck L, I know two of these people are murderers but there are some minimum conditions of correctional facilities and this seems a little Stanford PE

THE DRAMA OF THIS EPISODE I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE A BLANK BUT HOW FUCKED UP TO PUT EVERYONE THROUGH THIS L I THINK YOU NEED THERAPY!!!!!!! I MEAN LIGHT AND MISA ARE MURDERERS BUT FORCING A MAN TO HOLD HIS SON AT GUNPOINT AFTER IMPRISONING THEM FOR OVER A MONTH IS REALLY A REFLECTION OF A COMPLETE LACK OF EMPATHY (especially when you think that this version of Misa and Light don’t know anything!!! Oh my god!! The fuck)

“I will make arrangements so you and I are together 24 hours a day” call me crazy but I would not want to spend 24/7 with the man who imprisoned me for over a month while playing cruel psychological games all the while

“I’m one of those people who’ll accept Kira, I’d think of ways I could help him” Misa said Bimbo Rights

“I could never toy with a woman’s emotions like that” Light’s dating life and personality has gotten a LOT funnier since he forgot he was a murderer I kind of wish THIS could be the whole show

Also: Nice to know Light USED to have standards of how to treat women

Honestly fair play to both L and Light they both deserved to be punched and it’s funny to see eighteen episodes of mind games culminate in punching and kicking each other in the face

“Matsuda’s being an idiot again” “Well, Matsuda is a natural at that” wghkjhgkj what has Matsuda done to any of you

"He’s punishing criminals as a front, and killing people for the benefit of this company” is Light unknowingly going to solve the murder chain he himself started... inspiring

“I was testing you” this is why Light is your only friend, L, Aizawa has kids and it’s a dick move to ask him to put his convictions before them

Poor Matsuda realizing he’s got the least to offer to their team... me in high school science labs

I understand Aizawa’s moral crisis but why do NONE of these cops care about their wives or daughters they’re just kind of like, ‘I will provide for you but I have no interest in or fulfillment from being part of your life’ (ACAB)

Matsuda is truly about to die for being dumb and eager to help 😔 Rest in Pieces

“We must not allow Yotsuba to figure out that we are investigating them,” said L, just after it cut from Matsuda being obvious about investigating them. Oh Matsuda 😔 you’re so bad at your job 😔

MATSUDAAAAAAAA oh thank goodness; Bimbo Rights save the day

“I can’t go along with your idea, it’s wrong!” said Light, despite the fact it took him 15 seconds to get over murder the first couple of times he did it

Staaaaaaaaay Good Light, I don’t want ur Deathnotesona I want this young man with moral convictions!!

The level of hubris it takes to answer a phone call during your secret Murder Meeting while people continue to talk about their Murder Plans is just out of this world

“If I die, you could probably become the successor to the ‘L‘ name,” said L, to the person he has been trying to catch for twenty episodes

“I won’t say anything under any kind of torture” “Yes that’s true” Which he knows because he tortured her for six weeks!! You see that that’s fucked up, L, right? RIGHT??? RIIIIIIIIGHT? (LIIIIIIIGHT???)

Seriously not to beat a dead Shinigami but Light is so much better like this. He doesn’t want to throw people’s lives away for the investigation! He wants to protect Misa! He thinks Kira is wrong! Why does he have to be a murderer!!! Why can’t this show be about a nice young man!!!!

“Hey Ryuzaki, that’s messed up!” THANK YOU LIGHT AGAIN I KNOW YOU BOTH HAVE KILLED PEOPLE BUT YOU DON’T KNOW THAT RIGHT NOW SO FOR ALL MISA KNOWS HE’S JUST A GUY WHO TORTURES HER AND TELLS HER CRUSH WILL DIE IF SHE DOESN’T HELP

Wow Rem is so ride or die for Misa protecting Misa from creepy Higuchi, giving her info and telling her to trust Light, that’s love bitch

Props to Misa for getting a confession out of Higuchi after one (1) car ride

Why do I feel like L is going to be responsible for reawakening Bad Light is it because he psychologically tortured him for six weeks? Had his dad hold him at gunpoint? Forced Misa to investigate on his behalf? Constantly and unerringly presses him on what Kira would be thinking as he’s handcuffed to him 24 hours a day? Maybe!! This is like Build-a-Bear but he’s customizing his Teen Murder Friend

“Only Mr. Matsuda can do [the mission to lure out Higuchi!Kira]” Death Note really said the Himbos, Herbos and Thembos shall inherit the Earth

They keep saying they don’t know how he kills but it seems pretty obvious that he writes down their names to kill, they literally saw him do it

I really don’t want any of the investigation team to die but things are not looking hot :(

“Ryuzaki, I never knew you could fly a helicopter” “It’s just intuition” what does that MEAN

“Those aren’t allowed in Japan,” said Light, about a gun, as if he had not killed probably thousands of people without one

In spite of this fact I really do want Good Light to stay 😔 Why! Can’t! This! Show! Be! About! A! Nice! Young! Man!

Also they really are playing into this father-and-son duo I will be very sad when the dad inevitably dies as I’m sure he will

Family side note: I’ve been wondering this since the prison ep but where do Light’s mom and sister think he IS now that he’s dropped out of first year uni to be a teen criminal investigator handcuffed to a maladjusted homebody private eye

AIZAWAAA and also the other two guys I guess there was a plot relevant reason for him to rejoin the police huh

Well what a clean ending to this Kira arc. No one died and the killer was caught! Yikes that the next ep is called ‘Revival’ tho 😔 Rest in pieces Good Light

Also a new and very threatening intro???? What happened to the Twilight Apple Hands

BOOOO I knew Light would get his memory back but I was hoping it would at least fuck him up for a while he sorted out his two personas but I guess all roads eventually lead to Bad Light

Full disclosure I stopped watching for a few days just after Light got his memory back and let me tell u coming back later hasn’t made it any more tolerable I am truly not built for this EUGH

“Do you really want to halve your life a second time” “Well, that can’t be helped” REALLY???? CAN’T IT BE HELPED MISA??? WHY ARE YOU AND LIGHT SO CRAZY

Oh I guess we’re back to Light saying incredibly suspicious things right near the investigators lmao what if those cameras secretly had audio or you know, L simply knew how to read lips

“Misa, let’s make a new world together” Remember a bunch of episodes ago when Good Light was all ‘I could never toy with a woman’s emotions’?? What was the reason!!!

“Have you ever told the truth at any point in your entire life” L cutting straight to the core lmao (also the answer is obviously ‘no’)

This show has taken a jarring tonal shift why are they having a post-rain-confrontation massage and towelling each other off this is a level of intimacy I was not prepared for I NEED PEOPLE TOOK LOOK AT THIS:

OKAY OKAY OKAY I KNOW THAT IT WAS PROBABLY NOT THEIR INTENTION BUT THE ONLY WAY I CAN READ THIS SCENE IS AS “Don’t kill me Light~ 🥰 I’ll fuck you~ 🥰”

I guess L knew he was forcing Rem’s hand to kill him if he disproved the rules written in the book?? But to what end omg how does this help anyone

“In April 2012, Light Yagami, age 23, joins the National Police Agency” should’ve known we’d land here eventually (ACAB)

Ah, I see another person who doesn’t know how to sit, clearly they will inherit the L title next lmao

Update from the first few mins of the next ep: “Near should succeed L” told you

“There’s no way I’m letting Sayu marry a detective” ahjfkhkjf he’s a little old for her I think but it wouldn’t be the worst thing this show has done romantically lmao; maybe Sayu would get to investigate her brother

“I might’ve considered going out with you, if you were a little younger” HA GOOD FOR HER

“[...] the Japanese police are unreliable. In order to solve this case, we want you to hand over the notebook to our country.” Of all the Japanese-speaking Americans in this show, this is the most accurate jkhfkhf the US government really is Like That

Ah, so that’s where Mello’s gone, oh how the turn tables

Also way to sell your subordinates out immediately, NPA Director, will you give them the Kira task force’s home addresses too

The real question is if Light actually cares about his sister enough to prioritize her over the notebook

“Call me... N” Oh my good L... M(ello)... N(ear)... Oooooooooooooooo

It’s my saving grace that I only need to get through 9 more eps but as always I must wonder where this is going will Light just die and end up in Shinigami purgatory while the people who knew him after the fact go, ‘hey, that guy was fucked up’

“If things get bad, I’ll have to kill Sayu” well I guess that answers that question, my expectations of Light are so low and yet he continues to find new ways to be awful

Good for Mr. Yagami and Sayu for getting out of that alive I guess but hoo boy I think this is going to have some psychological repercussions for both of them

Uh oh this episode is called ‘Father’ I’ve been dreading this one bc I think that means Mr. Yagami is about to die 😭😭😭

“It was an institution for brilliant children, to raise them to become L‘s successor” okay calm down Professor Xatari that’s not what children are for lmao

Well I guess it’s a lot easier to track down info about these two guys than it was to figure out L lmao

HAHAHA Sidoh haunting Ryuk to ask for his stuff is a fun addition to this madness

“He’s scary for a human” jkhhfjh how unhinged does Mello have to be to threaten a literal Shinigami

I truly don’t understand the logistics of how they revealed Ryuk to the police force isn’t the second Kira notebook supposed to belong to Actual Kira, in the police force’s eyes????? I do not understand how Light can just turn up with another notebook and everyone’s like ‘sure cool’ did I miss something

Mr. Yagami killed for being unable to take human life ugh this is the worst

“You’re not Kira. I’m really glad.” WAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THIS IS SO SAD MR. YAGAMI NOOOOOOOOOO THAT’S WHY HE RENOUNCED OWNERSHIP OF THE NOTEBOOK

Neither Mello nor Near seem overly concerned with the lives of people around them does being a Super Genius Investigator also mean you have to be a dick (is this Benadryl Coddleswab Sherlock syndrome)

Lmaooo genuinely love how it’s constantly apparent that Light is the least smart of all of the smart people Light spent five years working on his reputation and it took Near one (1) phone call to destroy it

Ghjkhgkhgkgjh Light outsmarted by Near yet again never think people will prioritize principles over money

Lol yeah Aizawa needn’t have given a name after he said the “Deputy Director Yagami would kill Kira and then himself” thing, you don’t do that just for anyone who was he fooling

How does Light keep track of all the renunciations and notebooks bc I certainly can’t

Ffhkfjhfj Mikami truly looks like the son of L and Light it’s like Light missed him and was like, “Miss u boo :( (even tho I kinda killed u) I’ll adopt An Evil 27-year-old in ur honour :)”

Is Mikami’s story really, ‘I got bullied in high school and have mommy issues so now I think people I don’t like should die’ ok Shonen Snape

“I just want you to meet with me and hear me out” Light really proving to Aizawa that he can lie AND manipulate people’s feelings

“The truth is, she’s not smart enough to be my partner” first of all Light I think this show has proven you’re not that smart, and Misa’s Herbo Energy is effervescent and will outlast you, and third of all go to jail

“He’ll look suspicious if he doesn’t say something soon” “Ide, have you ever been in love” Matsuda continues to be the only good part of this show

“You’re the only man I’ve ever respected and admired in my life” GET SOME THERAPY KIYOMI

“You’re going to be the goddess of the new world” so it’s not enough for Light to be a murderer he must also be a cheater

Lmao Near’s powers of perception do seem a little B/BC S/herlock because L tried for literally months to work out the possibilities and Near is just like ‘I KNOW IT NOW’

“The only thing I can deduce from this is that Light Yagami is popular with the ladies” HEAVEN KNOWS WHY (PUN NOT INTENDED)

Every moment Aizawa gets closer to proving Light is Kira is another step closer to death 😔

“This is definitely Mikami’s handwriting” Not to be a know-it-all, Near, but handwriting analysis has been proven faulty many times in multiple courts of law

This truly is a game of Cat and Cat. All these hidden plans give me a headache fkjhkfjh call me Misa-Misa and spin me sideways I don’t have the braincells to spare

Well this is definitely some kind of s*xual assault absolutely fucking hate it wow this show truly just drains the life out of you

“Matt, I never thought you would be killed” why wouldn’t you think that at this point anyone who comes close to this investigation eventually dies (also wjkhkjhgk why is Matt special didn’t you kill all those thugs you had before -- Mello said ‘the lives of my allies are only important if they are drawn in handsome protag style’)

As of yet I haven’t really talked about Near’s wild toymaking but hoo boy is that L finger puppet something to observe

“Everyone who knows about the existence of the notebook will die” I’m still pulling for their survival, particularly Matsuda (himbo rights!!!)

Imagine if they just shot Light Yagami on sight how ironic would that conclusion to all these mind games be

“I’m waiting, for the one who will solve everything, to arrive” Lmao if it turns out L is alive I’ll pee laughing this show is so fucking stupid

Take a shot every time there is a Humpty-Dumpty-in-Puss-in-Boots style explanation about how everything actually happened

“I’ve won, Near” I bet/hope what gets Light caught is his inability to hold in his hubris for one (1) minute

Although the last episode is called New World, in which case maybe he wins in a very weird ending to a very weird show

Sjkfhkjhfkhfkjhf well I guess what gets Light caught is that the person he invited to be his murderous disciple keeps calling him God

“A second ago, you said ‘I win.’ That’s as good a confession as any” HA hubris strikes again also bold of Aizawa to clap Light on the shoulder knowing he is a mass murderer

Ohhh Matsuda he’s so nice and believed the best of Light :((((((((((((

Watching Light become increasingly desperate and crazed is very uncomfortable give it up dude u’ve been beat (though I suppose there is time for everyone here to be murdered still lmao)

LMAO LIGHT SAID “IF YOU CAN’T BEAT ‘EM, CONVERT ‘EM”

Yeah I figured if one of them was gonna shoot it would be Matsuda :( :( Good for him for not killing Light tho!!

Huh I guess that’s the end of the show I thought Light would die but I did think we’d at least get to see him in Shinigami Purgatory or smth... what a wild ride. This certainly was a show.

#ayesha talks anime #ayesha liveblogs dn #liveblogging #long post #sorry for any dn fans who stumble across this lmao i don't have the constitution for it

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teruthecreator · 3 years

Note

THS IS A ROBBERY 🔫YOUR ROLESWAP LORE!!! HAND IT OVER 🤲if u want 2 :)

just took my melatonin bc i have to wake up at 4:30 AM to drive 16 hours to my mother’s so i’m sorry if this becomes derailed but uh. here’s the roleswap lore! or, at least, everything i’ve decided (along with matthew and corinne bc the three of us tagteamed on it)

gonna chuck it all under a readmore bc this is going to get long

so first off, just gonna run out in front and say i have no idea how this fits into graduation plot. i haven’t gotten that in plot consideration, given their character differences in comparison to their canonical selves. so, for the most part, it’s a lot of background establishment and character traits. but i do have a few plot bits that i’ve figured out bc i thought it was cool. why such a long preamble? i don’t know. help me

fitzroy maplecourt:

first off, he’s not called sir!!! because he doesn’t go to knight school!

my idea for his backstory is that the way he decides to grapple with his identity crisis/imposter syndrome (which he definitely Still has) is that instead of becoming a grander, larger than life version of himself. he just. goes the opposite.

not necessarily becoming a degenerate (bc he just smokes pot and that’s not bad he’s just vibing)??? but more just like. leaning into the laid-back nature of life that one might pick up from a lifetime in rural country.

he goes to a liberal arts school a ways away and just decides to bum around and take life not seriously. he develops a pretty large group of acquaintances being a hippie stoner; he doesn’t really pursue a degree either. i think if he picked up any major it was probably like. an art major or an english but he basically fails most of his classes bc he doesn’t care!

unlike his canonical counterpart, fitzroy doesn’t mind being called nicknames!! ones i think he has the most are fitz or roy, but basically you could call him anything and he’ll respond. that is because, instead of clinging to the concept of his identity bc it’s the only thing he feels he has, his identity is nebulous!! he doesn’t understand it and it scares him too much to be concrete, so he just lets people decide shit about him for him.

his personal philosophy is more about floating through life and letting people assume shit about him than having a solid personality and backstory that people understand and recognize. it is a more dissociative way of having an identity crisis! how fun! he also barely talks about his past, and what he does talk about are cherrypicked points of his past that fit his narrative of being a casual down-to-earth hippie

the moment that this all changes is when order decides to pop in and grant him powers!!!! wahoo!!!! here’s how that happens:

he’s baked out of his fucking gourd in his dorm room, in the spring semester of his junior year. he’s alone (which is rare) and he’s maybe a little sad, but he decides to just ignore it. he looks at his table and laughs. “hehe, what if this table just. blew up?” he says to himself. it isn’t that funny, but he laughs. then he lays his hand on the table.

the table blows up.

after that, he has magic!!!

i’m going to go into detail a little bit later about how fitzroy’s magic manifests in the roleswap universe, but i wanna get through the backstory first. basically, he gets really freaked out after his magic comes to him because it is So New and Wow What and What The Fuck.

he realizes that this new addition to his character Completely changes how people who know him would perceive him (as a bum stoner chill guy), and he can no longer have control of his narrative with this magic business. so he drops out!

well, he actually just transfers. to a school far, far away where people will never know who he was and he can rebuild his narrative with this magic incorporated into it. he chooses wiggenstaff’s because he figures the school would have more of a knowledge of magic than his libarts school, which would mean he could understand why the fuck weed gave him magic (sidenote: it wasn’t weed, obvs, but he thinks this so for a while he doesn’t smoke!)

he is now the chill hippie of wiggenstaff’s!!! most people like him because his personality is fairly easy to digest; some people think he shouldn’t be there, but he is! he starts out as a sidekick and he would’ve honestly been fine with that forever, but then he’s suddenly thrust into the hero track!!! wow!!!! i will also explain this with the magic.

but yeah!! that’s fitzroy, for the most part. now we’ll move onto the other boy

argonaut keene:

he actually prefers if people call him argonaut, but he’s less likely to correct people than canon fitzroy Or canon argo. he’s a tad bit shyer in this universe!

argo’s backstory pretty much follows the same idea of his canonical background, but with some key differences that shape him into the character he is in the present!

basically he still grows up on shebrie’s ship, surrounded by crewmates and the salty sea air. but his fascination with the sea doesn’t manifest into this swashbuckling lifestyle that he has in canon.

what fascinates him more is the ship itself. how it functions, how water wears down wood, how directional currents can affect navigation. basically, he becomes invested in the sciences part of sealife more than the pirateering. he has special interests in marine biology, but his heart remains in nautical engineering. figuring out ways to make the ship run better, faster, and more efficiently consumes his childhood thoughts!

shebrie encourages her son’s craving for knowledge with tomes and books from all over the world about anything related to engineering and nautical things. he’s homeschooled, basically, but he becomes rather intelligent within a few short years!

and then, well....shebrie dies. yeah we aren’t escaping that finality, sorry folks. that part of canon Still Applies.

after shebrie’s death (coughMURDERcough), argo is. traumatized! and he makes the decision to almost entirely sever himself from his life on the sea. it’s all too painful to look back upon--the times he spent studying with his mother in the captain’s quarters, rattling off dolphin facts as they sailed onward, dreaming of turning gears as the ship gently rocked him to sleep--and so he just decides to throw the whole thing out!

he can’t ignore his lifetime of education, though, so he continues to pursue it. with the remainder of money his mother left behind, he enrolls himself in a boarding school of science and technology, with plans to continue study in Only engineering. no more nautical Anything on his roster.

eventually, when he is old enough and graduates high school, he roams around...trying to figure out what to do. he doesn’t have enough money for college, so he can’t continue his scholarly efforts yet. he works around, job-to-job, city-to-city, and just notices how...delayed everything feels. like society is suffering under this slow pace towards innovation.

and that’s when he decides his next course of action. if he were to discover the root of some problem and engineer a solution, he would be famous! he would gain notoriety and praise and--and all the things his mother had as a captain. but he would have it on his own, separate from his mother, and separate from his past.

he figures out his next course of action: attend a school that will give his prestigious enough marks to be accepted onto a research team, find a problem, solve it, help the world, maybe earn a little bit of that credit and respect that would make him feel like he was doing his mother proud.

the thing i want to emphasize here is that argo’s take on helping the world comes from that morality that canon fitzroy has. canon fitzroy wanted to be a knight because he wanted to fairly and justly instill ideas of “good” and “bad” onto the world. roleswap argo has a similar moral sense, but instead of establishing rules he wants to fix the “bad” and make it “good” in a technological/scientific sense.

the only school argo can think of that can get him that kind of notoriety is wiggenstaff’s. getting onto the HOG board would mean he’d have access to countless resources and be respected by a large audience, which would give him the opportunity to make change happen. even if he’s only a sidekick On Paper, what matters is that the diploma would give him the ability to Apply to the HOG. so he drafts a carefully worded letter for a scholarship and achieves a full-ride!!! epic

like fitzroy’s magic, i’m going to break down argo’s relation to the unbroken chain after i get through backstory stuff. but trust me, I’ve Thought Of It

argo sort of blends into the background at wiggenstaff’s. or, he would, if his roommates/friends weren’t so Fucking Out There. fitzroy is enough to make him always be visible, but even the firbolg’s massive frame means eyes are always on him. which makes him nervous!! he doesn’t like the attention (as opposed to his canonical self, who revels in it for the self-esteem fuel) his insecurities manifest more in what he’s Doing rather than what he Is, mostly because his identity is barricaded by a wall of trauma repression

he’s still plenty funny and witty, just quieter. also he’s a lot Meaner than canon argo, at least to me. because if you irritate him he Will just completely shut you down with words. motherfucker doesn’t bark but he will most DEFINITELY bite

that’s their backstories, for the most part! in terms of how they interact together:

as established, they meet prior to wiggenstaff’s on a tinder date (during the grace period of argo working odd jobs and fitzroy about to be granted immense fucking power) and end up casually dating during the course of their wiggenstaff education. argo is a nervous goober and fitzroy just likes making him blush. it’s very cute.

fitzroy is still less inclined for the romantic than argo, who remains a steadfast absolute romantic internally. fitzroy still holds a lot of the self-doubt and distrust that canon fitzroy has, only it manifests in him not taking anything seriously! which means when he catches Feelings feelings he basically freaks out

argo still falls in love really quickly, only now he’s more conflicted about it because being in love means trusting and trust means communication and communication means Oops Years Of Trauma Are Being Unloaded Uh Oh!

now i’m going to touch on the big points that i find really interesting: fitzroy’s magic and argo’s relation to the unbroken chain

fitzroy’s magic:

chaos is not the being that grants him magic. it’s order!

my take on what this means for what deity is on what plane of reality is that chaos is more Needed so they are the one that is physically On Nua, while Order remains in dreamscapes because they are already a constant amongst the tangible world. yes i know this directly contradicts the reasoning for why theyre Supposed to be where in canon, leave me alone i’m having fun.

my reasoning for this switch is because chaos stands to be a contradiction to everything canon fitzroy has going on. he has a very strict, nailed-down understanding of himself and the world. everything he thinks is in black and white, bold statements, no questions, he follows rules and obeys the law. untiiiiil chaos gives him magic and shocks him out of that complacency. they lean into his inner impulses and that rage he’s kept locked deep inside. they allow for magic to Explode out of him, rather in calculated bursts or with intent.

which is why order is more fitting for roleswap fitzroy!! because fitzroy, in this world, has less of a concrete grasp of himself and the world. he purposely lets himself be nebulous and goes with the flow. thinking of the future in real terms is not something fitzroy Does, he has no plans and that’s Fine. order seeks to give fitzroy a backbone, to put it simply.

his magic doesn’t go impulsively out of him. it is calculated--it comes with thoughts and intentions. the reason it surprises fitzroy when the table blows up is because he didn’t think his thoughts or wants would amount into that, but that’s what order is trying to show him. that his intentions matter. that he matters and he has to Think and Focus and Be Here.

i’m still not sure if his power would manifest as lightning??? because the imagery for the lightning works perfectly for canon fitzroy because of the random power of lightning strikes. but for roleswap fitzroy it’s more like...thunder. like Purpose. thunder happens because of a reaction--it comes with intent. if differing air temperatures collide, it creates thunder. that combination is purpose + intent equating in magic.

i think that part needs word bc like. how would one quantify thunder?? i think fire might also work really well because the idea of a controlled fire. like things have to Happen in order for fire to start, it can’t just appear like lightning can.

order’s manipulation relies more heavily on the concept of boosting him up as a savior/hero, rather than boosting his ego and desire for power. fitzroy Has no desires in roleswap world--he’s just there. but when he gets put on the hero track, now he’s suddenly been given purpose. and order uses that to be like “wow, look at all these people who rely on you! look how important you are! don’t you want to use this magic for good?? to do good?? start a war with a demon come on pussy :-)”

OH YEAH also he becomes a hero in this universe (like in terms of tracks) because of the fact that it directly contradicts how he views himself. for canon fitzroy, it was showing him how much more he is capable of without the restrictions of morals (i.e, king fitzroy). but roleswap fitzroy doesn’t Have an image he wants to bolster! he doesn’t think he needs it and, frankly, he doesn’t care for it. the hero tracks carries with it all these stereotypes and expectations that now directly contradict his personality--thus showing him he is capable of more.

okay now for argo’s business jesus christ this post is so long and im NOT EVEN DONE WITH ALL THE POINTS I WANTED TO MENTION

argo’s relation to the unbroken chain:

so since roleswap argo has less of an association with his past (and, by extension, the memory of his mother), he is less inclined to join the mysterious cult that his mother was a part of.

moreover, he doesn’t necessarily believe the shit he’s told??? he’s way more skeptical of jackal than canon argo is--immediately questioning why and how jackal knew his mother, and constantly trying to poke holes through his narrative.

generally speaking, if you try to talk to roleswap argo about his mother or his past, he Shuts Down. like completely. and that usually results in him snapping at you or just clamming up completely. mostly he just gets really snippy and angry because Hey Shut Up Dickhead I Don’t Want To Talk About It

a part of me still isn’t sure whether or not argo would take the unbroken chain up on their offer. but i also know that, plot wise and character arc wise, it is a necessary part of argo’s story. so i think, at most, he agrees but is extremely hesitant and might even let fitzroy on immediately once he’s given the task of digging into fitzroy’s life

also, they’re boyfriends in this universe, so how could he Really keep it a secret for that long. come on jackal, you idiot, you know they’re kissing.

i think he’d Eventually warm up to jackal as a sort of father figure, but only after many nights of conversation and dancing around the subject of shebrie.

OH YEAH. this argo doesn’t know the commodore murdered his mother! important to note! he just assumes what he was told was true, that she sailed into dangerous territory and was ambushed.

during the tribunal bit If That Even Happens In This World, i think fitzroy actually is the one who figures it out Before argo. and once argo does, well............fuck!

OKAY last little bit, just gonna talk about some random extra parts of the world that i’ve thought of already:

in this universe, grey takes on higglemas’s identity instead of hieronymous’s!!! this is for good reason actually

okay so basically my thought was that, instead of whatever happened in canon yadda yadda dog time, hieronymous and grey are fighting and it’s a pretty evenly matched battle. there’s a cooldown moment where hiero thinks he’s safe but grey uses sneaky backhanded tactics to try and get the drop on him.

only higgs sees it in time and saves his brother, taking the hit himself. he collapses, extremely wounded, and hiero rushes to his aid. he’s cradling his brother’s body, trying to keep him alive, when grey approaches to deliver the final blow.

hiero is completely crushed and defeated and basically will let grey do anything to him by this point. the only thing he begs of is to let him live long enough to save his brother.

now, grey isn’t nice. let me make that clear. grey fucking SUCKS and the reason he agrees is because he wants a Real War with hiero and he can’t get that if hiero is basically like “if you let higgs die then you might as well kill me”.

so, grey agrees, and hiero ends up saving higgs by turning him into a cat. was supposed to be a temporary solution until he could find a better spell, but he wasn’t the magic guy in the duo. eventually, grey gets tired of waiting and decides to do some other shit. like turning the school the brothers have been running into a backalley place for demons!!

he takes the form of higglemas and leaves hieronymous locked in his office as basically a mascot. he’s like the queen and grey is the parliament--grey makes all the rules, but everyone assumes it’s hiero. faux-higgs is more on the ground, changing things and making the school a place more fitting for an eventual war. he builds up the concept of heroes and villains being Real, in the hopes he can sway some mortals to his side when he’s able to open a portal to hell.

hiero still tries to stop this from happening, but his pride and his self-image is wounded by what happened. he feels guilty and puts the blame entirely on him, instead of doing the whole cowardice route like higgs did in canon. he gets people to help him eventually, via mind control and all tht jazz.

also in this universe, buckminster is the one who gets birdified instead of leon!! has to do with my leon/buckminster and higgs/hiero narrative parallels that i’ve thought of for far too long.

firbolg is exactly the same in this universe. it is hard to swap three people and i didn’t want to think about him.

fitzroy doesn’t pick a grab. i think he’d rather a lizard, like a bearded dragon. he names him something stupid. like scaly. or kyle.

uhhh yeah!!! i think that’s....everything i’ve thought of so far!! lemme know if you wanna hear my takes on any other elements in the roleswap world!!!!

#taz graduation #taz sir fitzroy maplecourt #taz argo keene #roleswap maplekeene #ignorance cloud on #thanks em!!!!#sorry this is a mile long i had a lot to say #and now...i sleep!#jesus christ i have to drive 16 hrs tomorrow #help me :-)#ember360

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imaginexsa · 4 years

Text

Coming Back (Bucky x Reader)

A/N: Hey guys! So sorry I took so long to upload hahah...I was having some issues with work and my mental health😗 Anwaysss, I don’t know if i made this angsty enough? And I hope this was what you requested haha I kinda struggled a little bit...uhHHHhH enjoy!!!

Request: @sarge-barnes-sir: henlo was wondering if u can do a bucky one hehe where he didn't get dusted, its set during endgame and bucky & the reader (they've been together since pre-hydra/40s) were sent to vormir (i actually have a detailed concept about this but i suck at writing) it's kind of confusing :( so u don't really have to do it but if u wanna to, i can explain it further or maybe dm u but again it's pretty convoluted so it's okay if u don't want to do it, i understand 💕 thank you!! stay safe and healthy ☺️

Warnings: angst, character death

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You couldn’t believe your eyes.

He was back.

You had been called to help during the battle with Thanos when you saw him again. You remembered your old friend, Steve, telling you that he didn’t die but seeing him in person hit you a lot harder than you had expected.

Steve and you were both test subjects for the super serum and had both went under ice that time to get rid of the Tesseract, but instead of joining the Avengers like Steve did, you wanted a break. You remembered the traumatic experience of seeing your lover fall off the train and you felt like you couldn’t handle anything, you were lost.

However, now, he was standing in front of you. The emotions you’ve held back all these years came crashing on you.

You didn’t know why but even though he was the love of your life, you felt tense walking beside him as the two of you trekked up the mountain in Vormir. It was a tensed silence as the two of you had been tasked to retrieve the Soul Stone.

The Avengers had figured out a way to defeated Thanos and it was to go back in time. You were honestly skeptical about the plan after seeing Scott get turned into an old man and a baby using the machine they created. However, when Tony had come to help, the whole situation changed, making it a lot more reliable and trustworthy to you.

Bucky and you were silent the whole way, each of you stealing glances at each other as there were a bunch of things you wanted to tell him but just couldn’t get the words out. Just as you were about to talk, someone in a hood came out to stand in front of the two of you.

“Welcome.”

You and Bucky tensed up immediately and drew your guns. “Red Skull.”

He didn’t react to the hostility from the both of you. “I am not here to fight. I am just a guide. To you, and to all who seek the Soul Stone.”

“Oh good, you can just tell us where it is and we’ll be on our way,” you said, still not putting your gun down.

“Ah, liebchen, if only it were that easy,” he said as he turned away. You and Bucky looked at each other before following him.

He brought the two of you near the edge of the cliff before turning to the both of you. “What you seek lies in front of you.”

You looked at the edge of the cliff, an eerie feeling washing over you as Red Skull continued. “As does what you fear.”

“The stone is down there,” Bucky stated.

“For one of you,” Red Skull answered Bucky’s statement. “But for the other…”

“Spit it out,” you snapped.

“In other to take the stone, you must lose that which you love. An everlasting exchange. A soul, for a soul,” Red Skull finished as he moved away, giving time to think for the both of you.

“Do you think he’s lying?” Bucky asked after a while of watching you pace in front of him.

You stopped and looked at him, deep in thought before shaking your head. “I don’t think so. Thanos left here with the stone without his daughter. It’s not a coincidence.”

You and Bucky stared at each other as emotions running through your head as you knew what this meant. “Bucky––”

“No, Y/N,” he replied almost fervently as he walked to you and grabbed your arms, he knew what you were thinking and he hated the idea with every fiber in his body.

“Please, Buck, if I don’t do this, billions of people are going to stay dead,” you said, giving him a sad smile. “Let me do this.”

“No, I-I can’t.” Bucky shook his head. “I’ll do it.”

“No!” You shouted immediately, shocking Bucky. You had tears in your eyes as you remembered the scene of him falling off the train. “I can’t see you die again.”

You shook your heard, looking at him in all seriousness. “I won’tsee you die again.”

“Y/N-”

You reached up and cradled one side of his face, seeing him lean against your hand almost immediately. You felt a sharp pain in your heart as you spoke. “I can’t do this again, Bucky. You know how much I love you and seeing you gone so easily…hurt so much.”

A tear slipped down your face as you saw Bucky’s eyes clouding over with unshed tears. You rubbed your thumb against his cheekbone gently. “I tried so hard to be okay, I wanted a fresh start. I couldn’t keep dwelling on this pain but…seeing you again, it was like the wound that had slowly been healing got ripped open again. It hurts so much. If I were to leave this place without you like what I did in the past, I’m never going to get back up.”

“Y/N,” Bucky choked out your name as tears fell from his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

You let out a shaky laugh. “Why are you apologizing, silly.”

The two of you quietly looked at each other before you pulled his head down and rested your forehead against his. “Please, please take good care of yourself. Don’t end up like the mess that I was. I know it’ll hurt but just know that I’m still here.”

You pulled away and took in a deep breath, turning to the edge of the cliff and walking towards it. As you stood at the edge, you closed your eyes and calmed your nerves before turning back to Bucky to give him one last smile before leaning back.

However, you suddenly felt someone hold on to your wrist as you dangled on the end of the cliff. Your eyes widened as you looked up to Bucky, his tears now freely flowing, drops landing on your face.

“Sweetheart, I really can’t let you do this,” Bucky spoke. “I can’t watch you die.”

You could feel your own tears falling as well as you steeled yourself. “Bucky, let me go.”

“No, please, no,” Bucky sobbed out.

“It’s okay,” you said as you used your free hand to hold onto Bucky’s wrist. “It’ll be okay. I love you, Bucky. I always will.”

With that, you ripped Bucky’s hand away from you as you felt yourself falling. Closing your eyes, you could hear Bucky’s shouts, despair in his voice before everything went quiet and you couldn’t hear anything anymore.

“Bucky, where’s Y/N?” Steve asked as everyone returned from their respective missions.

Bucky didn’t reply as he just collapsed to the ground, holding his face as he sobbed.

You weren’t coming back anymore.

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Tags: @sammysgirl1997, @melconnor2007

#Bucky Barnes #bucky oneshot #bucky imagine #bucky x reader #reader insert #avengers imagine #avengers oneshot #avengers x reader #angst #oneshot

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orange-waterfalls · 4 years

Text

Say It Back (2/2)

The Host x gender neutral!reader

@thekillingjoke-haha ty for the request(still)

Part 1

A/N: ok i know i made a playlist called "songs to cry to" and listened to it while writing a sappy fic but..... I didn't think I'd actually cry??? I had no idea how to end it I'm sorry ahvsgsvs. also I feel like should point out that I do headcanon that Host is on the aromantic scale, so that's why you are the literal only person who he has fallen in love with. Because. You're special???? I guess????? But uh I hope u like this. Rated T for cursing. Enjoy???

Word Count: 2.4k

Requests are open!

“Host, what the fuck are we doing?” Illinois asks with his hands on his hips.

Host sighs and stops pacing the floor. He turns to the egos- excluding Bim, who is behind him- who he has lined up in the living room. A day has passed since you went on that date with that guy. Host has no idea who he is, but he doesn’t like him.

“Host needs you all to help him,” Host states, his voice managing to stay flat though he was experiencing many emotions at the moment. Not all of the egos were present. The more serious/dangerous ones(i.e. The Googles, Darkiplier, Yandere, etc.) were not there. He’d also kicked out the ones he didn’t trust with something this important(i.e. Ed, Silver Shepard, King of the Squirrels, etc.). There is still a fair amount of them, however.

“Help? Wit what?” Yancy asks. The Host takes a deep breath.

“Host… wants to tell Y/N he’s in love with them…” A series of cheers, groans, and sounds of money being passed follow his statement.

“Okay, but what do we have to do with this?” Dr. Iplier gestures to himself and the nearly identical people next to him.

“Host… is not the most familiar with romantic relationships…” Host explains softly, “He does not know what to do… he needs help…” The room is silent and the Host’s heart beats softly in his ears.

“Oh, hell yeah!” Bing cheers. The other egos join and agree to help. Host swells with joy. These people are maniacs but, dammit, they’re family. Basically, anyways. “So, what do we do?”

“Hm?” Host is snapped out of his thoughts.

“Well, what are we supposed to do? Is there a plan or something?” Host stares at Bing. He… hadn’t thought of that. A plan… would be useful… in this specific situation… hm…

“Uh…” Host scratches his neck while he thinks. Bim rolls his eyes.

“Oh, Christ. Fine,” he pulls a chair up to the coffee table in front of them while the others sit across from him on the couch and in the seats.

“Does… Does Bim have a plan?” Host’s eyebrows raise in surprise.

“I have a lot of free time and believe you me, I knew you wouldn’t be able to do this yourself,” Bim explains. Some of the egos chuckle while Host blushes.

“Now,” He leans forward, as do the rest of them, “Here’s what we’ll do…”

Host does not know how he let himself get into this situation.

He is holding a bouquet of flowers, standing in the middle of your house, wearing a bowtie, of all things, waiting for you to get back. And when you got back, he’d take you to the movies, then to dinner, then the park and he’d finally confess his everlasting love for you while you watched the sunset. And then he’d go in for the kiss. Perfect.

Except… not perfect. Bim neglected to explain what he was supposed to do while all these activities were taking place. He didn’t do romance! He didn’t know how to talk to people! What is he supposed to talk about? The weather? His job? The goddamn election? What?!

Host took a deep breath to slow his beating heart. He could feel the blood threatening to drip from his eyes. He squared his shoulders and faced your door. You should be here soon. Bim said you’d be here soon.

Bim had a plan. Like, a plan plan. An “I have been waiting for this moment for so long that I already have every single detail planned down to the letter” plan. Illinois and Yancy would pretend to get in a fight outside your work. You’d go outside and break it up. You’d ask them what the fight was about, they’d give a stupid answer and you’d tell them to go home. Then Eric would show up, tell you that he thought he left something at your house the last time he was there and he really, really needed it. You’d tell your boss you needed to go home. You’d go home, open your door, and boom! Host takes you out. On a date.

Bim, King, and Dr. Iplier would take care of the rest. Bim would make sure the theater was clear… by doing whatever he does… Dr. Iplier would call the people who reserved a table at a fancy restaurant that they’re dying and need to get to the hospital immediately. King would make sure the park was clear by getting his squirrels to scare people away. It was perfect.

...

What the hell is he doing? He isn’t… like this. This is false advertising for what would actually happen if you two are to date. He’d probably spend a whole day writing and then hug you when you went to bed. Maybe a kiss.

But this? Movies(that he can’t watch)? Fancy restaurants? Watching the sunset? This isn’t him. Is it too late to cancel?

Host stiffens when he hears your car pull into the driveway.

30 seconds to make a decision. A) He can stay and go through with the plan or B) he can throw himself out the window.

He hears your keys in the lock and there is apparently an unforeseen third option where he walks out the back door like a sensible person. He breathes heavily once he’s in your backyard.

Okay. Bim’s plan is officially ruined. Great. What now?

He can go home and tell the other egos how he’s an absolute failure and literally cannot do a single thing right.

Or…

Or he could ask you out. His way. On his own, without any help from Bim. He heard you walk around your apartment, talking with Eric.

“So, what did you leave?” You ask. Host feels the dopamine flow through his brain at the sound of your voice. Unknowingly, he smiles.

“I-I-I don’t know. B-But it w-was i-important!” Eric stutters. He’s a really bad actor…

“Okay, it’s okay, we can look,” You respond gently. Host clutches the flowers tightly. You’re so… gentle. You’re so wonderful with Eric, so patient with the kid. You know what he’s been through, and you try to help and understand him. You did the same thing with Host. Maybe that’s why he likes you so much…

“U-Um, I-I think this is it,” Eric says after a few minutes of rustling around.

“Really? I thought this was mine…”

“O-Oh, uh… m-maybe i-it’s n-not--”

“No, no! You have it! Better safe than sorry.”

“O-Okay… um… a-are y-you sure?”

“Yeah, absolutely. I can get another one, it’s fine.”

“A-Alright… thanks!”

“No problem. Bye, Eric! Have a great day! Don’t forget to take your meds!”

“Okay… B-Bye, Y/N!”

Host bites his lip to suppress the happy chuckle that threatens to come out. He thought your interaction was the purest thing in the world. You’re… so… great.

Great? Really? That’s the best word he can come up with? Not “exceptional”, not “tremendous”, “marvelous”, “magnificent”, “stupendous”, “extraordinary”, “outstanding”...

He’s an author, for Chrissakes!

How was it that you took away all of his cognitive ability by just… being you?

Goodness, he had it bad, didn’t he?

Host jumps at the buzzing on his thigh. He takes the phone out of his pocket and answers. He hesitantly brings the phone to his ear. He has a feeling about what’s going to happen.

“Um… Hello?” He whispers.

“What the fuck are you doing?!” Yancy yells. Host flinches at the volume.

“I-”

“What the hell happened to the plan? What is your problem?” Illinois interrupts.

“Well-”

“Dude, we were rooting for you!” Bing takes the phone next. Host frowned, starting to get annoyed.

“If-”

“We’re trying to help you,” Dr. Iplier said, calmer than the rest.

“Everything was ready,” King said from somewhere in the background.

“Host,” Bim finally took the phone, “What happened?” Host was silent for a minute. “Host?”

“Oh, is Host allowed to speak now?” He teases. Bim chuckles.

“Yeah, sorry… Just… what happened?” Host sighs.

“Host… realized… he wants to do this… his way. Without help. He doesn’t need it. Y/N will either like him, or they won’t. All this… fancy stuff won’t change that. Host needs to do this on his own,” Host explains. The phone is silent. He’s begun to realize that silence does not equal upset. Bim snorts.

“Well, you could’ve fucking said that before we convinced that young couple that they’re dying,” He laughs. Host flushes and he’s glad no one’s around to see it.

“Host is sorry…”

“Eh, it’s fine. I’m sure if I ask Wilford, we can do all the shit you were supposed to,” Host can hear Bim’s smile when he talks, “Good luck Host.” He hangs up, and Host is left sitting on your back porch.

Ok. New plan.

Host tears the bowtie off and throws it in your trash, along with the flowers. Hopefully, you wouldn’t mind.

He straightened his back and cleared his throat, raising his fist to knock on your door. He paused.

Wait. What if you didn’t like him? What if you were already dating the guy? Did romantic relationships work that way? He wouldn’t know.

He shook his head and knocked three times. He’d deal with that when he got to it.

The door opens to reveal… you. You’re wearing sweatpants and a Pokemon hoodie. You raise an eyebrow at him, a slightly annoyed look on your face.

God, you’re perfect.

“Host? May I help you?” Your face softens when you see who it is. The Host swallows nervously.

“Uh… may the Host come in?” You nod and step back, allowing him to step into your house. His knees would have buckled with the sheer smell of the house if he hadn’t been here before. The whole place smells like you and he nearly collapsed the first time.

“Would you… like a drink?”

“No, thank you.”

“Okay, well…” You both stand across from each other, a few feet apart. “What would you-”

“The Host likes Y/N,” Host blurts out. You blink at him, hand in mid-gesture.

“What?” You ask quietly. The Host takes a shaky breath and grounds himself. He is going to get through this, no matter how embarrassing or traumatizing it may be.

“The Host… I… I like you. I love you. I am… in love… with you…” He says slowly, not fully comprehending what’s coming out of his mouth. “I like you. Say it back, please.”

“Say it back, please”? Really?! Could you sound any more desperate?

He looks up to see your head tilted slightly. Why were you so cute?

“Okay…” You furrow your eyebrows, “Elaborate?” Host takes another breath and swallows. His throat is very dry. Maybe he should’ve said yes to the drink…

“Host… is in love with you. He has been for a while. He’s not sure when it started, but he knows it’s a very strong feeling. He loves to hear Y/N talk and laugh and… walk around and… do anything. And… he thinks they are such a wonderful person and he wants to be the one to make them happy… he wants to be the one they go on dates with and come home to… because… he loves them…” Host holds his breath while he waits for the response. The suspense might actually kill him at this point.

“I… like you,” You finally say. Host knits his eyebrows together.

“What?” He asks.

“You… you said to say it back…” you whisper, “And… if it happens to be true… that’s not my fault…” Hosts eyebrows raise as high as they can go.

“What?” He repeats, barely louder than a whisper. He hears the floor creak as you walk over to him and he breathes heavily in response. What’s happening? What are you doing? What’s going on?

His breath hitches when you take his hand and intertwine your fingers with his.

“I love you too, Host.” You whisper. The Host feels extremely light headed. You love him? You love him? No, no, no… but…

“But… date… with… guy…” Host murmurs. There goes the brain function.

“I went out with him to try and get over you…” you admitted, “I didn’t think you actually liked me…”

“Why… not?”

“I’m not… anything special--”

“Yes! Yes, you are!” He raises his voice, “You are… exceptional! And tremendous! And marvelous, magnificent, stupendous, extraordinary, outstanding… and… so much more!” You stifle a laugh.

“You really think so?”

“Yes!” You chuckle. You shift your hand so that you’re holding his fingers in your hand. You rub your thumb over his knuckles. He begins to shake slightly. Too much. He was going to pass out.

“So… what now?”

“Hm?” Host turns his head from your hand holding his to your face.

“What do we do now?”

“Host is not sure, he didn’t think he would get this far…” You laugh out loud this time and a smile appears on the Host’s face.

“Well… do you want to awkwardly kiss?”

“That… It would be nice…”

You shuffle forward a bit so you’re very close to the Host. He stands completely still, not exactly sure what to do with himself. You lay a gentle hand on his cheek and kiss him. Not deep, not… sensual, just… a small kiss. Host still gets very flushed by it and his cheek is very hot on your hand. You pull back after a few seconds.

“How… was that?” You squeak.

“Good… it was… it was good…” He pants. You both stand there, unmoving. Then, you start to giggle.

“We… are adults… and we’re acting like teenagers…” You laugh. Host smiles.

“That… we are…” Host starts laughing as well. You laugh at each other and how ridiculous you’re being before you remove your hand from the Host’s. He immediately misses the contact. You wrap your arms around him and hold him tightly in a hug. Host hesitantly wrapped his around you. You stood, swaying a bit, feeling very comfortable.

“This is nice,” you sigh.

“It is.”

“What do you wanna do now?”

“Host is… a bit hungry…” You snicker.

“Alright. I’ll make something.” You pull away and Host chases after your warmth. You lead him to the living room and sit him down on the couch. You go to the kitchen, leaving the Host alone with his thoughts.

You… like him. You… love him. How long have you loved him? Why didn’t he know? Is he really just that stupid around you?

He sighs and traces his knuckles with a finger.

He loves you… you love him…

He couldn’t remember the last time he was this happy...

#the host #markiplier the host #danger in fiction #danger in fiction the host #the host x reader #the host x male!reader #the host x female!reader #the host x gender neutral!reader #the host x you #the host x y/n #x reader #x reader fanfiction #x male reader #x female reader #x gender neutral reader #x you #x y/n #markiplier egos #markiplier egos x reader

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misterbitches · 3 years

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Hello! @flootweed replying to the post from before. the long format was killing me. why does tumblr look like this...

I haven’t watched episode 8 yet...or have I? If it’s the most recent one. No.

Is the hornbill a bird? It probably is but I have a terrible memory and I’m dumb so. I skipped the last few weeks because I’m scawwed. How are you liking it? I did see someone say that the hornbill makes sense (without knowing what it is...at all) bc heart transplant patients only live like 5-15 years after but someone in those comments pointed out that he was so young when he got his and that’s pretty rare so he has a higher likelihood of survival. Frankly, this is the only way I will proceed. Since when did shows ever care about the heart transplant health? Never and it needs to stay that way!

What did we think of ep 6? LMAO. I need opinions! And omg it makes me feel special when I can point things out to people because I so...rarely get to LOL. Editing is like one of my favorite things ever so I can be super particular about it but I try to do the thing you do when you’re supposed to see if it works within its context. I’d like to go in with scissors and glue but alas.

THe mic covering....the rustling....it’s like guys...please. Ironically the audio today wasn’t great. I don’t know why. IDK if you watch c-dramas but I am not even sure what’s worse between them because they dub their dramas. But actually no it’s best to have the dubbing because even tho it is painful they have to put a lot of effort into it. LOL.

Right? @ Aey! It’s just weird if they would show us more about what he’s done instead of saying he’s done sth bad and not even explaining that....like you could even do some shitty exposition. I think if he is to be a true villain then we really need to be privvy. All the warnings make it seem like he’s a fuckin’ serial killer so when we get the scene of him at home it’s like....actually this is really serious? Maybe his pain is like...for a reason. Althought you won’t even TELL US WHAT HE’S DONE WRONG BESIDES BE JUST FUCKING WEIRD AND ANNOYING! So from what we have it’s just a realllllllll fucked up sad person lol. god i forgot about the dinner! and i totally agree. he really needs them to succeed. i like your theory because it would make the scene where he like blocks the twitter user make more sense. he also says they dont really know each other etc so it’s realllllyyyyy probable that he just sees it as a way out. if not then we shall pretend u wrote it :)

god yea i wouldnt say it is art but i also guess we technically have to since it is technically. in the way that technically performance artists are artists but mostly i uh technically ignore them. Also one of my fav BLs is called the best twins. If you do not know what it is I will not elaborate further.t

i want to know more abt poli sci majors lmao but they sound DRAMATIC/ hopefully most ppl in ur cohort arent losers!

hahahha i understand. there was just a thing on twitter about DSA and then the day before about reading discourse. the same thiings. over. and over. and over. and over. we are our own worst enemies but also our own best friends? but i hate tankies and that wont change. but hasan’s a decent guy. he said sth abt black ppl during biden’s primaries in GA or whatever and i was like chill. but he’s insecure and has adhd which means ur more open to being wrong and changing otherwise u will suffocate and die.

and totally about hiding fuck ups. i’ve tried really hard bc of organizing IRL to like...be honest, question, etc but also like...approach it naturally? because if you’re trying to be perfect and so worried you’ll fuck up you don’t realize that puts more stress on you, makes you seem like a robot, and could potentially not make you realize the mistkaes you made. also if we’re privileged in certain spaces there is just no possible way we won’t get something wrong. im light and i know that honestly any way to speak up on colorism is going to be difficult and that’s a space where i have power so i just have to figure it out. we should be uncomfortable because we have to sit with unpleasant feelings and sort through our own whatever. that just makes the next time even better and people can trust u more. i think some people sweat it sooo much or maybe they think their personal life and what theyve been through is more the norm? on the other hand people can be sf reactionary in the worst way and idk what their issue is. there was also a user who said sth very inch arresting about tankies which i thoroughly enjoyed (how like violent lefitsts or tankies / ppl who are like ooh a gun whatever just want to be violent in another space so they have shit tendencies from jump and nothing of substance which i think i agree with tbh fo ra lottttt of ppl. like their anger is actually like “no im about to beat that ass” instead of what we actually want to get done)

sort of in the same vein re: taking it easy...we coudl all be more understanding too. to slow it down like you mentioned about not being privvy to fucking eveyrthing and saying anything on our mind. i saw this person talk about y2k which was a huge deal while happening bc it was the turn of the millenium (bruh were u even alive?) but this twitter user grew up in a super super SUPER religious household and was like why do ppl make jokes about Y2K it was insanely traumatizing? though my first instinct was confused ive tried hard to like look more before i judge especially thanks to a friend of mine. turns out that with the further reading the more we found out he was just really traumatized; it was very common in religious households to be afraid of 2000. so we could have come at him with no understanding and he could have thought that everyone had the same experience with that year that he did. his feelings sit precedent though but i think it was just very hard for him to fathom.

i didnt reply bc he didnt need that and what could i have said? he’ll see what the truth is with exposure and unfortunately this was something he really did go through.

and that’s what makes most people think others could be over the top. because it sounded ridiculous but then it was this huge traumatic thing that we could have never known about. so maybe when someone sounds like actually crazy they have an explanation? of course some ppl are just batshit or annoying but that’s anywhere not just leftists it’ just means more i guess when a ~~librul is annoyed~ but it can be easy to want to make fun of ppl too. lmao. basically what i am saying is the internet? especially twitter? for leftists? in this economy? bitch it’s the wild west out here.

i am 29! idk if i said it or not. i am OLD u probably werent even born in the year i was talking about wah. i know not old-old or old at all but compared to you i’m due for a colonoscopy.

omg i hope u can get vaxxed soon! are you wfh rn? i hope ur also not in a bad state as in state state not state as in ur being :| bleh what a fucking time. it sucks that you have to fucking do work. well unless u like school. which i hope u do. i just assume everyone hates it cos i did lmao

was it the lindsay ellis drama? that bitch is dumb. if there was other drama oh wait the drama i was referring to it all happened on the same day. idk book twitter that well but i saw something from someone who was abt that shit and wowie! the american people are not that.....intelligent to put it lightly.

i’ll get better. ppl tell me they miss me and im like aw. i have insanellllyyy bad insomnia and a lot of stuff happened this year HOWEVER I SLEPT FOR TWO DAYS FOR 8 HOURS AT A REASONABLE TIME. im a new woman. anyways you too! i hope ur not too burnt out with school. we just dont know when the burnout is or we just dont know we are burnt out until we are. the panaramiciccici hit and all the things i was ignoring kind of just fell on me and sooo much happened at once. and frankly it’s hard to take care of ourselves. lord.

Like if you aren’t interested in expanding on the issue in a way that hasn’t been done before all you gotta do it like… spread resources and donate if you can. I dont see the point in having to say something about every issue especially if you (not at you specifically just in general) aren’t immediately impacted by the issue. Like is the 14 yr old white marxist named sarah on twitter really gonna have meaningful insight on anti-asian violence ?

this is part of why i cannot telecommunicate. i dont want to do shit on the internet. i am able bodied so i know that this time has been of such ease for other people. but mentally i just can’t. i don’t have a comment on hand like that and i hvae no desire to engage with ppl that way. i am a super super super solitary person but thats bc it’s MY time so when it’s like all this effort with other people i dont ever want to be alone. it’s the same with the way i approach filmmaking. it isnt a sole thing so i hate it not together. that’s part of how u can get so sucked in and repeat doom scrolling. i was in this webinar last may after [redacted] and this black woman prof said “read with a community and talk” because otherwise she said we are torturing ourselves. you can’t carry that weight all on your own. unfortunately i hate zoom, discord, slack, signal, whatsapp, facetime. you name it this panera has made it evi.. L

you make a really excellent point. i think the young young gen zers are really really just interesting because it’s like this whole new world for them with leftist politics and they just can’t grasp the horrors of the world and the kind of freedom being a leftist can bring. and so many people don’t grow out of it. those people so happen to be the “least productive” in terms of how much time they spend IRL withe these issues. naturally, younger kids are gonna have a harder time. they are not as mobile as well so the internet becomes this place. but then it’s this echo chamber. and many times just things posted without sources. and social media NEEDS that to exist.

i think of the irony of leftist kids on tik tok and while i am happy it’s reaching them it’s just....different. very different. the growth of social media is so good but also so fucking sad, it’s too much! i think the point about not writing everything is major. even i have to do this which is part of the disappearing.y ou need to detach and make sure your head is on straight again. but when you think eveyrone has to be privvy to every thought and you can’t just sit back....which twitter and social media doesn’t encourage. you have to join in. that’s often why when i have something to say it is dense because i don’t feel like repeating it. ever. lmao ust ever. i cant pay attn. social media is a fucking minefield for my brain u can get so lost in it and absorb it but once u start talking you may not be able to stop.

i think a big part of that is it not being a leisurely thing but sort of just in our lives always. this sounds like a grandpa rant but ykwim. We dont have to see the same thing over and over again. And eventually it gets sincerely diluted or its diluted bc of capitalism or whatever. Or if theyre very young or maybe they don’t have like the greatest way of sharing the knowledge? then it can be butchered. I hope this is making sense...i’m talking beyoond the boring surface-level milquetoast shit. i see really ahistorical stuff on there from leftists (like this thing about NK + africa and it being a beneficial rship as opposed to a um not beneficial one. and it isn’t. beneficial but this young black girl was talking abt it and noname rtd and i was like it’s just too complex. there’s no good/bad here just bc it’s not america. dont get me started on this.)

but Lol that was kinda off topic but I think what I meant in my last reply about not turning off the voice in my head is about when I consume media, not necessarily when I’m online talking about. Even if I have criticism for something, I’m usually pretty chill when consuming fandom content bc I think being serious online all the time is kinda boring. Like sometimes I’m analyzing theme and shit but really most of the time im memeing.

exactly.........gotta laugh. thats why sometimes im like i cant think lmao. unfrotunately i have been ARGUING with ppl on the internet for rly no reason when i could have replied to ur very nice fun wholesome message. i love torture. i miss memes.

“ i think the people who get the least enjoyment out of that are those so obsessed with getting upset with anyone thinking outside of their lines as if it equates to them “ EXACTLYYYYY

kekekekeke im glad u got it. it’s like with conservatives throwing around snowflake. now im beginning to question who the real complainers are.

LMAO exactlyyyy. i posted a screenshot of this writer from twitter saying that exact thing. Like first of all, I’m...an adult? and if you are as well uh? i’m sorry for you but are we 12? But how is it affecting u this viscerally? And if it does why dont u...do...research? pihgofuaipoajghou but honestly everything u said. we’re trained to go into it with nothing. i was only around ur age when i started to get more serious about this stuff but you’re like lightyears ahead of where i was at 21. did i say this but i’m in iww and literally i can tell u in 2016 i did not think 2019 me would be in a union bc i told my friend in a train station that we don’t need unions. i was 23...but the thing is i didnt know what i was talking about. at all. and i knew i didnt know and she knew i didnt know and now i am the clown.

also yes at critical engagement. i had to learn so much through experience and this is tuff that i coudlnt be shielded from. there’s an empathy you kinda have to develop and this understanding that you move through the world as this person who is “nowhere and everywhere; nothing and everything” so i’ve always had to think about things differently just to survive. that’s also what can drag a lot of people towards it like theres so many black kpop fans bc i think a lot of the pain in SK can be mirrored (sort of) through our history. and theres currently a history now but it had to be forged. uh what was my point oh yea however i wouldnt have been able to move further if i didnt have my background to go off of bc i knew something was off when i started getting into all these things (ill give u a hint) but if i had no prior knowledge and didnt have to think about it then the critical approach is either stale or stupid.

i had to research but i dont understand how ppl are so bold with little to no research and understanding? thhey just inherently know with also like ZERO experience in what they need experience in. engaging critically means “how i see the world” with dashes of trying to be open adn understanding or whatever. actually that’s another thing like being afraid of criticizing things bc theyre foreign to you so u give it a pass (like we discussed) but it doesnt hAVE TO BEEEE JUST REAAAAAD and then take all the info ur teensy brain and apply it. be a normal human being and dont be fucking rude and racist. thats it! u can complain abt literally anything without being a dick.

as we start with LW and end with LW.....what do we think (i asked this already) omg please share wbl thoughts i THINK i know what ur talking about. well it could be two things; their rship when they came back and the physicality and then pei shou yi. i almost dont even want to use my brain to fucking look at that. i think wbl can get away with more bc of visual~*~*~* reasons (like literally, the look of the show. there’s more space to get lost in the frames. many thai dramas are a lot more literal? this isn’t the right word but it’s very heavily character focused particularly bc of $ i think) though good production also underscores flaws so i am also wrong. but like do u know what i mean? u have to kinda focus on it? or maybe it’s just cos like.....ur so used to it in thai bl idek. i’ve seen tw bl ofc.

look i swear i will justify this forever bc there are some things we miss right but if u feel like someone’s a bad actor....theyre bad. it’s about tone movement etc etc etc and since most thai bl productions have 0 interest in that....well. they take these newbies and put them in these situations. we dont understand thai but if we see them and we’re like “wow this is really bad” then they’re bad lmao. IDC i will never be like cos idk what theyre saying NO WHY HE LOOK LIKE A ROBOT???????? DOES HE EMOTE? why is he CRYING WITH NO TEARS? and it’s not even a total requisite to cry with tears(i mean for me it is) but it’s just like what is happening on ur face right now young man????????

painful.

the inflection stuff is very valid ooh good point tho but that’s only a part of the piece. plus we get used to the way they communicate. like the ppl from sotus were prtty bad. i dont like that show but thats an ex of ppl liing the actors and the person i thought was better other ppl dont think that? well apparently hes a shitty guy but. um. so when theres decent acting its so glaring.

although i must say even tho i dont care for 2gether anymore and would never like to be reminded about its existence (only bc i just cringe lol) i honestly....didnt think bright was a bad actor? but people keep saying he is and i am much more inclined to believe them than myself. though i am not often dickmatized that could have been it. until he opened his mouth and ruined it and then i stopped paying attn.

although honestly i’m so much more critical than i could be positive. i have ben stumped for the last day about how i wasnt mad at his acting in the show. is it me? is it him? who’s......the wrong one.....(me)

oh shit they have been denied? i haven’t been paying attn to whats been going on recently. i just got into it on MDL because of snowdrop. sometimes i literally cannot engage bc ill just be like alright well im black so this power button in my head is going off when ppl talk abt that shit. back in the day when kpop jawns were saying some real outta pocket anti black shit (now everyone is slick with it) it’d always be THEY DONT HAVE GOOGLE THEYVE NEVER SEEN A BLACK PERSON but really it’s like no...maybe they are just racist? that’s ok too.

also the past 2 weeks have been um atrocious bc how fucking easily people fell into the pit of white supremacy and started to turn their ire towards black people and making a competition between our groups just like they wanted. it’s not about the women who are dead anymore, who were sex workers, their womanhood, being asian, being poor anymore. it’s about how much black people get attention and why people only pay attn to us. i am not feeling very generous this week for ppl to excuse that hsit.

on a lighter note, ppl say that abt the whole husband and wife thing. i dont know how to explain how angry that shit makes me but maybe it’s because i do not want to think of my body in relation to a fucking penis at all hours of the day. if bls could kindly not do that it would be nice lmao

yes there are a lot of those. who are only there to gawk lmao. and just idk worship bc of the cult of personality thing bc of how weird and open they have to be as actors. some of the others are people who /think/ theyre really smart (i think im asmart but i also think i am very dumb and i have adhd to prove that MEDICALLY!!!) but are actually not? or their observations arent great? or idk if they are they arent interesting? but i think well..........we have more refined palettes :P

jk also theres just different personalities. you and i mesh more bc we have a lot of the same beliefs and are coming from the same place. that makes it easier to understand as well. i really try to remember that but some people are really weird so. again just...the perception of certain things even down to acting skills. but i also dont like.......believe this genre can really do anything at all. on one hand i want them to do it right bc it’s a piece of work so they should. be proud of it. cos most things arent advancing us bc representation and culturalism are a lie bla bla. it’s just that when the depictions are negative or not done well it adds to the problem as opposed to the things that are well done are fairly benign and can’t really pull us back (perf example is the black panther film. i woudl definitely not say it was transgressive as a literal work but visually it’s just stunning. and it’s sad that it’s stunning and surprising but still with basically an all black cast of mostly dark people abd like what it means in the zeitgeist yes. it’s also just a good movie. but it’s still imperialist prop and unfortunately and this is fucking pathetic to say it “opened eyes” in other countries where they hate black ppl and ignore their own racialized minorities HENNYWAYSSSS a better ex is moonlight except moonlight isnt mainstream and is indie tho...still thru a funnel of capital bc a24 but who cares bleed the fuckers dry is my motto. my point is moonlight is both a great work and doesnt bring any failures to the table and its existence helps in ways outside of art but they arent the defining things giving us material advancement sooooo i mean it’s complex (this is my conclusion to everything um guys it’s complex)

er i had one more point in conjunction to above. oh yea so i like dont need all these extra things to make it progressive. like people really want more women in the show and i am honestly like i really dont. i dont want them to actively do this. if they cant do it naturally then let someone else do it. i am not asking for more bc i dont want it from them. when something comes along i embrace it but i do not see why women should be represented when the genre RELIES on patriarchy. there is no complete satisfying existence for the women in these series. i dont want it. i dont ask people to show us~*~* or respect~* like fuck no the people who make it make it and hopefully more will make it in the future but i will not beg bc THEY DONT WANT TO DO IT SO WOULD FORCING IT MAKE IT BETTER? just fucking leave them out entirely. that’s the answer if theyre gonna make nasty female characters then those bitches can geaux. we have other plcaes to be. booked. and. BUSY!

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hongism · 3 years

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CALY CHAPTER 33 OH MY GOD WHAT HAVE YOU D O N E 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 first and foremost moc yunho is still at the Bottom of my list rn but good on him for Realising some Things and being less of an asshole u got this bb we’re all rooting for you 😔😔😔 then OH MY GOD YEOSANG I AM SO SORRY FOR EVERYTHING MEAN I’VE SAID ABOUT YOU IDC YOU ARE FORGIVEN 🤧🤧 WHAT ELSE DO YOU NEED BC I’M USELESS AND CAN’T BRING BACK WOOYOUNG I’M SORRY ? TISSUES? A SNACK? A HUG?????? ALSO HONGJOONG???????? HANG IN THERE BB U GOT THIS 😭 wow he’s really waking up to a shitstorm huh with 3 crew members gone, yeosang in hysterics, y/n making that deal with jisung 😭😭 AND WHEN I TELL YOU THAT LAST PART WITH SEONGHWA AND Y/N ALMOST MADE ME SOB PLS I WAS HAVING LUNCH WHILE READING THIS AND I COULDN’T BAWL BC I WAS IN FRONT OF MY FAMILY BUT I SURE AS HECK WANTED TO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! very inch resting that jisung may not be as peachy as he is in y/n’s memories/flashbacks i’ve never even thought of that but it makes so much sense😔😔😔my guess is something (or a lot of things💀) happened in the military and on missions that showed his bad side but bc they were so traumatic y/n blocked them out of her head 😔😔 as the biggest simp for mr han jisung i’d like to say i don’t trust him one bit i’m watching you sir 👁👁 y/n hot tip: when the crew bring you back to jisung knock him out so you can escape with them 🤩🤩 lots of things to unpack with wooyoung and the sirens 😔 how did y/n manage to see through his perspective??? does umiko not mean child of the sea like daichi said?????? if wooyoung is the moon and seonghwa is fire and y/n is not the sea...would she be the earth??? i did Research and found that umiko is associated with taurus and hence earth?????? i’m too pea-brained to understand the prophecy someone help let’s put our brains tgt 😔😔😔😔 oop sorry for the mini essay but wOW MISS CALY YOU JUST AMAZE (and hurt🤧🤧🤧) ME EVERY TIME WITH YOUR WRITING I AM STILL V V SAD ABOUT YEOSANG SAN AND SEONGHWA OKAY GOODBYE I’LL BE CRYING IF ANYONE NEEDS ME - 🦔

IM SO SORRY BBY I DONT KNOW WHAT HAPPENED I JUST LOST MY MIND MY GOODNESS IM SO SORRY 😭😭 oh goodness im wiping my tears moc yunho our dearest asshole our dearly beloved bless this man for admitting that he has a problem! it aint fixed but he admitted it and that is the first step 😃 literally EVERYONE is backtracking tHE FUCK out of everything awful they've said about yeosang i told yOU i saID you would REGRET IT!! i TOLD YOU!! little did you know it was bc i was gonna BREAK HIM!!!

someone save hongjoong tho this man is about to wake up and wish he could go back to bed forever i REIOJIROSIOJ oh my god this poor man he needs some alcohol and some sleep 😭

anD IM SORRY IM SO SORRY!!! I CANT BELIEVE YOU READ IN FRONT OF YOUR FAMILY IJOFSDFJI OH GOODNESS i dont know how to explain myself i dont know anything um sorry? i really did a big oopsie there T-T all you guys ever ask for is some Gentleness and i go and do this? see this is why i said you would be MAD at me!!

and our boy jisung the man of the hour in my inbox this man who everyone is suspicious of kljSFKLd the dichotomy between the Jisung who lives in y/n's memories and the Jisung who exists in real life MMM it's delightful and heartbreaking and beautiful and delicious yall are gonna hate me !! all our jisung simps are gonna have trust issues after this 👁👁 y/n better be listening to that hot tip while she can KLKJDSFLK

and the OTHER man of the hour mr jung woo fucking young this man BOYYY it was about time the truth came out and wow the tea will be getting SPICY from here on out mhm! umiko DOES mean child of the sea thUS it should be inferred that she is the sea 👀 and while it's HARD TO COMPREHEND!! daichi gave a big hint before the prophecy bc you have to remember that she is seeing through wooyoung's eyes, daichi said 'you let fire burn you, the sea will drown you in her grasp' hMMmmMm someone else is earth so i would say it's best to stick to her being the sea 👁👁

and I LOVE UR MINI ESSAY ITS BEAUTIFUl!! IM SORRY FOR THE PAIN I'LL MAKE UP FOR IT SOON I SWEAR 😿 DONT CRY TOO MUCH I'LL FEEL BAD 😿😿

#🦔 anon #moc: spoilers #anon #asks

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professorspork · 4 years

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i know I always say this, but, last night REALLY WAS the BUSIEST OF DAYS in the Reaper War

before I get into yesterday’s gameplay, I realized I forgot to react to the fact that Jacob got Brynn pregnant, which -- again, I suppose that wraps up everything about his backstory in a nice little bow, lad of the bad dad gets to be good dad, but like... it still gives like they gave his character incredibly short shrift. so. humbug to that.

but I have bigger fish to fry (ha ha, literally, see what I did there?) because ALL OF THIS HAS HAPPENED BEFORE, AND ALL OF THIS WILL HAPPEN AGAIN. I rescued Ann Bryson, and learned that -- shocker -- she had a bad relationship with her dad. I uh may have condoned her getting a bit of a nasty nose bleed in order to track the Leviathan to Despoina, where as ever I got to read a bunch of people’s weirdly specific sad diaries. my jump into the depths was very cool and scary (does no one get the bends in the future???) and I enjoyed my The First-style body swapping conversation with the Leviathan in which I tried to prove I’m ~special and this time is ~different. on the one hand, I don’t know why I expected the origin of the Reapers to be anything other than yet another story of AI gone wrong, but this whole cinematic parallels thing is starting to edge out of “everything matches up and is of a piece” territory and into the murkier waters of “we kind of only had one idea, actually.” to reveal that the Reapers’ plan is just stray AI code to ‘preserve life’ is at once very chilling and a bit of a let down; when I think back to when I talked to Sovereign for the first time and I had my initial “GOD IS A MACHINE THAT WANTS TO KILL US” freak out, I was in fact very on board for an evil plan too broad and complex for a human mind to fathom. for it to be this feels kind of predictable and pedestrian.

that said, watching the Leviathan take down a huge-ass Reaper capital ship with its pulse signal was very satisfying.

oh no this is going to get very long, now that you’ve had this fun teaser i’m gonna put the rest under a cut

then we kicked it on over to Thessia and I highkey traumatized my girlfriend. I feel like I should have seen the reveal that the asari were more advanced because they were hoarding prothean tech coming, but I didn’t. hearing and seeing all the asari commandos helping me get wiped out was a real gut punch, but didn’t hold a candle to my frustration at the confrontation with Kai Leng. I’m not mad that the game wouldn’t let me beat him, per se (though I still think it’s ridiculous that I’ve taken down a Reaper by myself and I’m supposed to be afraid of a dude with a knife), but I am pissed that it all happened with combat cut scene magic. this game has given me difficult combat before! if, in fighting Kai Leng, I’d genuinely felt outmatched, I think I would have tolerated it better -- or if the combat had been me fighting the Harvesters and then Kai Leng sneaked around me because that’s what he does, he sneaks. but to have such a relatively easy combat sequence with him that felt very much like winning just to have it snatched away from me... maddening. WHY CAN’T I BEAT THIS ONE GUY AND HIS KNIFE? I don’t want to be all “Kai Leng is a Mary Sue” but like... he got to murder Thane and then beat me in overtime, and his entire vibe is I exist to sell action figures even though that’s not, as far as I know, any part of Mass Effect’s profit model. so it’s just frustrating. and for them to then rub salt in the wound and have him EMAIL ME to be like “lol snowflake r u triggered” was just. MY PATIENCE IS THIN, ME3. DON’T PUSH ME.

seeing Shepard have to admit to failure was a gutting scene, though, and a necessary one. and watching Liara fight with Javik was highkey satisfying, too.

so anyway, because i was BIG MAD at Cerberus I tracked them first to that one N7 communications mission--

(Sample dialogue: Helen: Why aren’t you using cover? You’re going to die! Use cover! Me, jumping out of cover and rushing Cerberus goons trying to melee them to death: BECAUSE I’M MAD)

-- and then to Sanctuary, and HOO BOY WAS THAT A LOT OR WHAT. from the second I heard Oriana’s voice I had a pretty good idea of what was going on here, but seeing in in practice was still creepy af. and like. i’m just gonna go out on a limb and say INDOCTRINATION BAD. I AM NOT A FAN. shout out to that one capitalist volus on the Citadel who was like “lol sanctuary is a scam don’t waste your money” i guess

additionally, last night was significant because I picked not one but TWO ENTIRE renegade convince options, because I saw no reason to be nice to terrorist daddy the illusive man or actual terrorist daddy Mr. Lawson. after I got through all that, Helen explained to me how difficult it apparently is to keep Miranda alive by the end of that confrontation, so I got to do some WHAT LIKE IT’S HARD? preening at how Nice Sheps Finish First sometimes.

but as usual, the real highlight is getting to know my crew better and talking with them. I finally got some prime flirting in with Liara during Leviathan. it was VERY cute when she was like “man what’s with you rescuing damsels from dig sites? if you end up teaming up with her to save the world and bring down the shadow broker i’ll be very jealous. ... and concerned” and WEIRDLY CUTER when she was like “hey the only tentacled alien who gets to mess with your brain is ME” because Liara is like 115 by now considering how slowly i’m getting through these missions and she still does not know what romance is.

[no but seriously, Liara does not know what romance is. half the time I’m still going WE’RE STILL DATING, RIGHT? every time she refuses to talk to me. and even after Thessia, when everyone was like “go talk to Liara, she needs you” and even JAVIK of all people was like “you’re dating Liara, right? it’s so obvious” our interactions did not feel particularly... romantic? it’s a tricky needle to thread, obviously, I’m not looking for sloppy makeouts right after millions of her people died, but it still reads as very odd to me. anyway.]

Javik’s story about how he once had a ship like the Normandy and a crew of friends like mine and they all ended up indoctrinated and he had to personally slit their throats went way harder than I ever expected it to. even just the IDEA of having to do that as my Shep upsets me. i’m legit enjoying getting to know Javik, even though i’m still GuessWhoJustGotYelledAt.jpg every time I leave his room. I HAD ENOUGH OF THAT FROM KREIA, JAVIK, YOU’LL NEVER PUSH ME AWAY.

I was surprised by how hard Tali took Miranda’s successful challenge of Mr. Lawson, though in hindsight it makes sense -- with the geth war still happening on top of everything else, I don’t think Tali ever did get the chance to process her anger at her dad being a war criminal and all. and her whole “emergency induction port” bit about the straw was cute as hell tbh. her friendship with Garrus over the comms continues to give me life.

(in other quarian news, I AM SAD ABOUT KAL’REEGER.)

and jeff. JEFF. after Thessia i literally ran to the bridge and said aloud “Jeff, make me feel better” as I clicked interact with him, and then he made that dig about asari dancers, and i was like NO NOT LIKE THAT. (I mean, what Shep literally said was “now’s not the time for jokes” which is ironic considering she, unlike me, still calls him JOKER) but then he was all DAD ANDERSON SAID I’M SOLELY RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR MENTAL HEALTH, I’M SORRY, I’M DOING MY BEST and like. what a fucked up little family we are. he feels guilty that I died saving him, still! apparently he asks EDI about my stress levels and they are BAD and he feels BAD! im crey. OH AND ALSO THE FACT THAT PTSD ASARI LAURA BAILEY WAS TALKING ABOUT HIS FAMILY ON TIPTREE AND I CAN NEVER TELL HIM BECAUSE THE GAME DOESN’T LET ME DO THAT???? V UPSETTING.

and then of course EDI had to TRIPLE DOWN on all these feelings i was already having by telling me about human resistance and selflessness on Earth and how she wants to turn off her self-preservation code because she’s not about that. I’M SUCH A TOASTER FUCKER HALP.

Garrus being all “well sometimes your best friend gives you a pep talk” speech was cute as hell, and I was strangely charmed when Kaidan was like YOU CAN TELL I’M EXTRA MAD BECAUSE MY VOICE HAS GOTTEN SO DEEP grumbling.

next up: shore leave, and then going after Cerberus will trigger act 3! i may one day finish mass effect after all!

#leah plays mass effect 3

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uncloseted · 3 years

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1/2

1/2 Hi. I think I could use some help, I'll try to make this short. When I was 14yo (I'm 20 now) I dated a 18yo guy, thank God we were taking it slow and never made things official. Now that I'm older I can see that relash was rlly wrong. He was manipulating, used me to boost his ego, forced me to do things I wasn't comfortable doing and I think although we weren't official, he cheated on me? (more on that later). After a few months of fooling around, I found out something about him that I didn't like and confronted him about it, with the intention of ending that relash. He started begging me not to leave him, asking me tricky questions about the things I had heard of him with the intention of "making me realize" he did nothing wrong, and he even became violent with the person who told me those things, to the point I couldn't break up with him because I was scared. I just stopped answering his texts and calls because I was afraid of even talking to him and eventually he took the hint and suggested we broke up. We decided to stay friends, but that only lasted a few days, because one day, via Facebook Messenger, he suggested we got back together and I rejected him, so he blocked me. Months later, I had to close my Facebook due to harassment (not related to him) and opened a new one. Facebook showed me his profile in 'people you may know' and I decided to peek out of curiosity. Turns out, the moment we broke up, he started uploading photos with his new girlfriend. The descriptions of those pics said the exact same things he used to tell me, and I ain't good a math but I did some calcs and he had to be with her while still being with me lmao. I really didn't care, I was just happy I got rid of him, and I moved on with my life. Some time later I fell head over heels for a guy from my workplace, who I still hold close to my heart. I have trust issues and I am a very private person, especially with my relashs, so I didn't tell anyone about this guy except from like 3 friends. One of them was a girl (that we'll call Anne) who was like a sister to me, and was also friends with my ex. Over the next 2 years I had a relash with this guy, everytime I talked to Anne I used to tell her more details about my relash. Then, one day, I got a text from my ex. He texted me like we were besties and nothing had ever happened between us, like he didn't block me TWICE (yeah, he blocked me from my new Facebook too even though I never tried to reach out to him). I was angry at his nerve and told him so, he realized I was upset and changed his persona from confident and tough as nails to regretful and soft, telling me he was sorry for being so immature all those years before, but excusing his shitty behavior by saying he always "kept an eye on me". Um, wtf? He told me he was always asking stuff about me to Anne, looking out for me. I wanted to know what exactly he knew, but, trying to manipulate me again, he said he would only tell me if I accepted to play a game with him: I could ask him one question if he would ask me one in exchange and so on, and we had to be ttly honest with each other. I really didn't wanna get into his shenanigans but I only had one question (wtf do u exactly know about me, creep?) so I accepted. He asked his question first (dID u fEeL sAd wHeN i bLoCkEd U?) and I asked mine. I thought he maybe knew something about my school stuff and MAYBE that I had been dating someone else. Turns out he knew every. single. detail about my personal life. Not only he KNEW I was with other guy...

2/2 Not only he KNEW I was with other guy. He knew his entire name, the school he attended and every little detail from our relationship and other stuff about my personal life. Every single thing I told Anne, opening my heart to her, she told him. I felt terribly violated. I felt like a dissected frog, open for anyone to see my most inner parts. I felt ashamed, unprotected, sad and angry, all at the same time. I told him what he did was disgusting, to never reach me again or try to "keep an eye on me", and that I would make that job easier for him by getting Anne out of my life. He apologized, said he understood the situation, would respect my wishes, and wished me a happy life. I thought that was it. It took me a while but I got to heal, to feel safe again, although I still have a hard time trusting my friends. But I was wrong. Months later he sent me a Friend Resquest. I was a lil afraid, but tried to calm myself saying he probably just was checking if I was still upset, so I rejected the request and again convinced myself that was really it. But then he sent some girls to take pictures of me during my high school graduation ceremony and recently, his cousin (who was my friend when we were 14 but haven't talked since) texted me. I know that sometimes nostalgia makes you reach out to old friends, but we weren't close at all. Besides, he acted super weird, didn't even try to make small talk or let the convo flow naturally, but went straight for super specific and weird questions: are you studying college? what are you doing with your life? are you in a relationship? I was really weirded out and considered the possibility he may have been asking all those things because my ex asked him to do so, so I kept my answers short and vague, not giving him the info he wanted, and although I def came out as cutting, he kept asking. I tried to still be friendly because I didn't wanna seem paranoid, but I think he realized I wasn't telling him anything over texts, so he asked me to meet again over some beers with his friends on October 27th and that's when I stopped answering. I thought about that strange invitation for a few days until it hit me: October 27th is my ex's birthday. So much about respecting my wishes. I spent the rest of that month really nervous that cousing would try to reach out again, but nothing happened and I started to feel calmed again. Until, in November, he wrote me again, this time asking me if I wanted to go to the beach with his friends. I haven't even bother to open that text. Since them, I've been super paranoid. I know my ex's attacks aren't that consecutive (more like every two years: he contacted me and sent me that friend request when I was 16, hijacked my graduation at 18 and now sends his cousin at 20) but I can't help but think he's always there "keeping an eye on me" and planning his next move. I stopped accepting any friend requests because I'm afraid he will send someone for me, and if someone I already have on my friend list but idk texts me and after some small talks asks me about my life, I get paranoid and ask them why they wanna know and if they have some hidden intentions. Also, there's a mall near his house, and everytime I have to go there to buy something, I feel like crying because I'm afraid I'll stumble with him. I probably sound crazy. Some people may think I'm exaggerating and I should just let my ex stalk me and act all obsessed, but I feel dirty everytime I think about him knowing my personal stuff. It was just so traumatizing the first time. Do you get me? I feel like nobody gets me. Please help me, what can I do? I don't know how to make him stop, I'm tired of living in fear.

Not to start this off with an unrelated thought, but when did Tumblr get rid of its character limit on asks? I don’t think I’ve ever seen it let someone send in a message this long in one ask.

To get to your situation, I can definitely see why this would be a stressful and uncomfortable situation for you. The first thing I would do is to stop interacting with your ex and people related to your ex. You don’t owe his cousin anything. Block both of their numbers, block their social media accounts, etc., and do that for everyone else who’s friends with your ex (or put them on limited profile/create a “close friends” list on social media). Tell all of your friends in no uncertain terms that you don’t want them talking about you to your ex, even if it’s stuff that seems harmless, and cut those people off if they do talk to your ex about you.

The other action you could take is to file a restraining order. If you go down that route, you’ll have to fill out some forms and file them with the court, and then have a hearing with a judge where you explain your situation. Then, you’ll have a second appearance in court where the stalker is present, and you both get the opportunity to explain the situation. The judge will then determine the final order and the conditions of that order. It can be a bit of an involved process, but it may give you some peace of mind.

The last thing I would suggest is going to therapy. It seems like you’ve been through something traumatic, and a mental health professional can help you to work through that and move on from it. There are many options for therapy, both online and in-person. If you have health insurance, your insurance should cover at least some therapy sessions. If not, some therapists provide services on a sliding-scale, and online services like BetterHelp can be less expensive than traditional therapy.

#Anonymous #effys-closet #effys closet

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starmic · 3 years

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Mimic for the character thing?

send me a character and I’ll list

favorite thing about them:

I love his design so much. The black eyes, the ripped clothing, the bandages, his knives, those tentacles. He’s so handsome he’s my husband. When I saw him in Tangle and Whisper 4# I knew he had my heart. I really like exploration his character and working with what I have to create my theories for him.

least favorite thing about them:

I kinda wish we had more of an insight on his character. I know he’s evil but it never really shows his motivations for his actions. It’s just he’s evil look at how evil he is, he killed his team, he traumatized the shy awoo, u should hate him.

favorite line:

“Heroes become martyrs, professionals stay alive.”

“Ha! It should be criminal to be this smooth.”

“Jokes on you Doc. You’re the one who’s not waking up tomorrow.”

“Leave the precision work to the professionals, kid.”

“Time to pay the piper Doc.”

“Go ahead. Deny it. Give me an excuse.”

brOTP:

I really like what Mimic and Zavok have going in Bad Guys, also enjoy the concept of a disgruntled Mimic mentoring Rough and Tumble

This is mostly au related but I’m still gonna drop it

Starley au: Mimic and Infinite, Mimic and Breezie

Redeemed au: Mimic and Tangle/Whisper (edgy octodad gets redeemed by two lesbians)

OTP:

Mimic x Nack, Mimic x Zavok, Mimic x Vanilla, Mimic x Smithy (pre betrayal), Mimic x Abyss, Mimic x Nack x Starline, Mimic x Zavok x Starline

...I can already hear the rants, but Mimic x Starline. I’m not about to give up a ship especially since people still ship egg////. I’m definitely not gonna keep up with the fluff prompts, a lot of it will be angst/slow burn-related, it’s a more somber ship. I can explain it better if it’s brought up again but my rundown is that it could’ve worked if people actually decided to write Starline as something else other than obsessed with Eggman.

nOTP:

Mimic X Whisper/Tangle/Jewel....just no...y’all are getting a little too comfortable with the girls

random headcanon:

Mimic cooks for himself and refuses to eat food made by other people, as an assassin he’s poisoned plenty of people through food. So him eating food made by you is a major sign of trust.

unpopular opinion:

I’m really upset with how unpopular Mimic is in the fandom. I understand his character isn’t the greatest, and I myself am working on my own take of the character (please no yelly at me). But the fact people shit on him for an unsettling design and that he’s evil sucks. He really had the potential to be an excellent arc villain, but since he’s not well received by the fans, the attention goes to the next best villain boy, Starline.

song i associate with them:

I have a mass of songs for my Starley!Mimic and Redeemed!Mimic, but I’ll focus on canon Mimic. My songs for him are SIU by Maretu and Monster by Kira

favorite picture of them:

I’ll associate by artist cause every pic of Mimic is my favorite and I can’t choose like that

Evan Stanley:

Jack Lawerence

Aaron Hammerstrom

Diana Skelly:

Johnathan Gray:

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gg-astrology · 4 years

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Can you tell us 10 things about you? and about ur friends irl? How u met them/ how long u know them/ what u like to do with them? This is gonna sound nosy but how's ur love life hdjsks LISTEN YOU'RE LIKE MY DREAM BEST FRIEND AND I WANT TO KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT YOU AND ACT LIKE WE'RE TOTES HOMIES OKAY IM A VIRGO SUN PISCES MOON smh a girl is cURIOUS AND (platonically) IN LOVE WITH YOU 😖❤❤❤❤

Hey there!! 💕💓❤️ Oh wow!!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️ Don’t worry this is fine!! I’m actually -- like, really happy and giddily flustered you’d want to get to know me!? 💕💓❤️ I’m really flattered and really grateful/touched aaaaaaa only virgo/pisces deserve rights, my current wife is also a virgo/pisces this is obviously some kind of synastry destiny (jk *wink wonk?*)!! 💕💓❤️thank you for caring about me!!! 💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️💕💓❤️

Yeah sure!! 💕💓❤️I can tell you more things about me!! 💕💓❤️

Disclaimer? I think it’s good for the audience to know where I’m coming from and who I am? I just think transparency/knowing who you’re talking to is important because knowing who I am, can also help you and me see where my flaws are and where I may be coming from! 💕💓❤️ Or what I provide, but where I might miss my mark somewhere, y know? 💕💓❤️ Not to say you have to judge me, I just don’t see the point in not just being who I am and saying yeah I can see where I took the L there. It’s just-- better? for future endeavors as well? So here we are?

More about me? In sections?

10 things about me?

I’ll start with this since it’s the shortest!

This may come off as totally random but I do better in colder climate than hotter ones -- even though I currently live in a tropical island

I used to live in the US!

I actually have a designated place where I go to sit, open up my laptop and answer asks from tumblr. I sit outside my little patio and stare out at my garden, and then answer qs from here!

This means I’m always subjected to the Wild Life coming at me unexpectedly sometimes, but my cat also visits me at my table! So it balances out!

My favourite drink is milk but I like plant-based ones, or rice milk? Or the lactose free ones! They’re delicious!

Cherries are my favourite snacks but I usually get them once every 3 months -- so the result is I don’t tend to snack often. This is by design of me trying to Not Snack + using my pickiness to weaponize against myself and my eating habits.

To unwind I watch cat/animal videos on youtube before I go to sleep - it’s not very effective because I have to keep my eyes open to see, plus I always end up making cooing noises at the screen -- so I’m not sure when if it’s actually making me sleepy or not. But it’s working so far so I’m continuing to do it.

I have very specific knowledge of certain things in very acute details + link/resources of further studies on the topic, but otherwise I have 0.5 braincells most of the time, just a lot of Forbidden Knowledge.

I have a folder of cursed memes and that’s all you need to know about my sense of humour I think?

Love life?

I am currently single! 💕💓❤️ Gf application is always open! 💕💓❤️ However, I’d like everyone of you to know I’m a 95 liner and I will not accept applications from those born after 98′ 💕💓❤️

Although I’m bi + had ex-bf before... I am (as of right now) on the fence about men personally in my personal life (disclaimer) because I’ve got a week of quarantine, thus I haven’t been doing the do and can think clearly for once. I am contemplating. Men. And the necessity in life. Y know?

Although my love life is free!! I am not excused from the occasional panic of having a crush (annually). I’m lucky enough to go through it just once every year, but every time it happens I am an absolutely clown + always in turmoil. It’s what happens when you’re a sag venus who can’t control your p***y brain. Luckily, my crush just have to insult me or make me explain things from my past and then I’d be too traumatize to crush on them again. It’s quite effective, and works out best for all of us! 💕💓❤️

I’ll refrain from talking about my ex because I know I have a habit of recounting the good and being mushy. Even if we ended it on rocky terms. So! I’ll save everyone from that. 💕💓❤️

Friends (expanded, clarifications?)

The ones I mention on the blog are usually

taurus/taurus,

cancer/cancer,

leo/libra,

leo/cap (x2),

virgo/sag,

libra/aries (x2),

scorpio/sag,

scorpio/cap,

sag/taurus,

pisces/scorpio,

pisces/aqua,

Oof that’s alot.. This might be better to outline in a timeline format... so leo/libra, scorpio/sag, libra/aries and partially virgo/sag are whom I grew up for the majority of my childhood-teenage life! 💕💓❤️

They obviously made a very big impact on me! 💕💓❤️ They’re with me through thick/thin, leo/libra (sag rising) is the extrovert of the bunch. He’s one of my best friends, close guy friend, most of the time I too find him a little exasperating because he’s.. well its his problem so nevermind, but he’s also very endearing! 💕💓❤️ If it wasn’t for him-- well, there’s also another leo I thought was very endearing in a little brother kind of way. So leos to me have a very positive influence in my life, they’re very cute especially when they ask for your attention. I think they are like puppies/kitties when they are needy, and their blatant way of just being themselves always makes me feel refreshed + I admire them for it. In the end, I’m totally heart-eyes endeared for Leos! 💕💓❤️

Scorpio/sag is also my best friend! 💕💓❤️ She’s a taurus rising, and she’s so sweet, kind, chatty and very open/friendly to people! 💕💓❤️ Her, my cousin (who’s also a scorpio but a scorpio/pisces), and quite a few of my other best friends who are scorpios - actually made me realize they’re not like what they’re usually describe as. Maybe that’s just me? But I think they’re very sweet and comforting to be around, not to mention they’re quite supportive and willing to listen when you’re having a tough time with something!! 💕💓❤️The pillar of support and one of the few rare people I don’t mind interacting with (actually crave interacting with them) because of just how chill they are, I wish more people recognize that in a scorpio! 💕💓❤️

Libra/Aries is one of my longest childhood friend, probably from birth! 💕💓❤️ He’s a supportive big brother type figure. But he can be very silly and he doesn’t hold himself so seriously most of the time! 💕💓❤️ Whilst he’s very understanding and quite nosy with others, he tries to be subtle/sleek but he isn’t! I think he’s very endearing when he wants to be, and he deserves someone who loves him lots as well 💕💓❤️ We reunited for the first time in 6 years the other day? And I think we both ended up crying a little and holding hands because we miss each other alot! 💕💓❤️ It was very nice, I think he’s much more emotional (just suppressed) than what people realize! 💕💓❤️ He’s very caring though - like willing to talk you through your problems and make sure you’re taken care of, back on your feet, but also willing to smile scarily at people who’ve hurt you and actually take them to court/yell at them for you. I think its very sweet! 💕💓❤️

Virgo/Sag is someone I hung out with for a short period of time, but kept in contact with periodically throughout my life because we ended up going through similar majors/path in life! 💕💓❤️ She’s someone who’s very caring, wants to take care of you, when she’s endeared by you she makes sure to dote on you often! 💕💓❤️ Actually, she’s born a day after Namjoon I think? But that’s not the point, the thing is - she’s my virgo/sag and when she’s not by my virgo/sag she’s super cool and I can see that many of our friend respects her/think she’s very mature + she’s the Shit! 💕💓❤️ I really admire her too and I think she’s super cool, but more than that, I love how caring and tender she is. She’s the best 💕💓❤️

These are the people I grew up with, and then I went to college and met/lived with Scorpio/Cap + Pisces/Scorpio+Aqua.

Scorpio/Cap and I actually hit it off since the first day? We were in orientation, and we’re both talkative I guess! But in similar ways. He appreciates my bluntness/sense of humour and I like that he’s sarcastic and the only one engaging enough to be around/paying attention to what’s happening. We went to a house party together and then had 1 class together the semester. After that, me and him decided we’d live together off campus (along with our other friend who fell through, I think he’s a Leo?) - whilst we lived together we share majors in the same division, on holidays or at night after class, we’d grab dinner together + walk there, or we’d eat at home and binge watch a marathon he’d pick together. 💕💓❤️ It’s really fun! 💕💓❤️

Both of us like cooking, so he’d make dishes/drinks and I’d do that and we’d coerced each other to hang out in the living space together. Basically, we’re there to force each other to socialize/hang out with people and also encourage each other. It’s very fun! But we also had moments where we’d buy each other dinner/go to art galleries/exhibit together. There’s more serious too of course, like talking about our problems or worrying about stuff. But I think I found someone who looks out for me/I can look out for him, be confidants for each other and not be embarrassed with each other. Besides this, he also found my p0rn collection and suddenly mentioned it when we’re on campus so now I can never unfriend him because he has blackmail material on me. I’m forced to be his friends forever now.

Pisces/Cap and Pisces/Aqua are my roommates after Scorpio/Cap - actually, Pisces/cap invited me to live with them when I was finding a place, it was very fortunate! 💕💓❤️ We’re all close friends because we live in the same hall during first year, plus me and Pisces/cap (and a Gemini friend) would get drunk + go to parties together so!! This is very convenient! 💕💓❤️

Actually.. Pisces/cap, me and Gemini friend.. I went with Gemini friend to buy his apartment with him (along with his friends, I’m good friends with them too) and Pisces/cap went with him to buy furnitures lmao! 💕💓❤️ And then me and Pisces/cap moved in together, although I didn’t room with them. I roomed with Pisces/Aqua whom till this date is my favourite roommate I’ve ever lived with! 💕💓❤️

It’s a little messy with Pisces/Cap but not in a? bad way? at all? Like we’re close friends who still talk often, but they did confess once over the holidays, and I turned them down (that was when I was about to move in) - we did make out along with pisces/aqua but like.. that’s... I guess that’s normal for college y know? We did a couple projects together for their class, like a comic about me and gemini friend, poems, photography, I drew them something. And I think they did have something with Gemini friend as well but! Gemini friend moved away on the last year so it never went anywhere there.

But these are all good memories we had together and it’s not like-- bad at all, I don’t ever think badly at them for it because it was honest to them/for them, it was their emotions and tenderness from the heart? I can’t ever look down on anyone for that or judge them for being true to themselves, I actually think they’re very brave to be able to heal themselves and process things especially involving emotions like that. I also think these are all precious and honest memories, being friends with them definitely helped me grow my EQ by so much. Without them, I’d be very close-minded today! 💕💓❤️

Pisces/aqua is my roommate for a long time, and I love them to bits too! 💕💓❤️ They have two cats, both I love so so much and would sacrifice getting up for very often! 💕💓❤️ More than that, Pisces/aqua is so smart and able to pick things up immediately! It’s honestly very admirable, how they pierce things together. Whether it’s tarot or astrology, they’re the one who got me into this actually? 💕💓❤️ It was their interest before it became mine through proxy or maybe osmosis lmao, but they’re quite judgey and sometimes have a ? idk, superiority complex/elitist attitude towards stuff sometimes? So I never really talked about it much with them because it can get really frustrating sometimes 💕💓❤️ I do love them lots though, I can be ignorant of a lot of things and really slow on the uptake, but they’re very nice and kind and patient with me - honestly they’re as patient as a saint sometimes with me. And I’m really really thankful to them for it! 💕💓❤️ They’re getting married this year to a Scorpio! 💕💓❤️

Taurus/taurus and Cancer/cancer are my college best friends. Actually we hang out outside of class too! 💕💓❤️ I celebrated cancer/cancer’s birthday with them and their friends/roommates and it’s really fun. Heres why it’s -- like, momentous. It’s because my college classmates are more like colleagues or co-workers, so we don’t usually have that kind of camaraderie outside of first year. Plus, we’re all kind of working or busy with our private life outside of class - so it’s hard to reconvene that with who you know in classrooms.

They like their private life separated from the college one, which is what I prefer as well. I really adore them though, since we have a major that usually makes us get little to no sleep and have to stay at school at night-till morning most nights (for programs on the computer or printing facilities, rip) -- they’re the one who would either stay up with me, working together at the same table and we can ask each other for fresh eyes on our work. Or they’d motivate me to go home and not be stupid to stay at school. Or they’d drive me home so they know I get back safely/on time. It��s just -- I adore them so much they’re very very good! 💕💓❤️

Taurus/Taurus is also a college best friend whom I befriended later on in the years, they’re really sweet! 💕💓❤️ We have more of a friendship where we spend time outside together, walking in the city trying out a new cake store or just going back to their place to play games or talk about what else we have going on in our lives. They’re really busy!! Since they’re involved in church activities, they travel to another town an hour away every sunday - their dedication to their work, school and church (AND spending time with their fiance’s family + fiance) is amazing! 💕💓❤️ They also got me my first job at the firm they’re working in, in our last years - I made sure they’re not too tired and get their work done on time so they don’t rush their finished project. Or give better advice if the teacher is making them fume. I really like them lots too, we had alot of fun together AND they’re a foodie! 💕💓❤️

There’s another Libra/Aries whom I knew from college, while I was still living with Scorpio/Cap - I was in another town/not the same town as the Pisces back then. But Libra/Aries was close and she’d come by often! We’d travel the city together, lay on the lawn, go to parks together or exhibit. They’re very proactive and we spend a lot of time talking about work and projects, personal interests, when we watch movies together - we’d spend time sitting in cafes after watching them to talk for hours/until closing about the movie ( ‘we have alot to unpack’) -- they’re a lot of fun to talk to because they’re just as intense about stuff! 💕💓❤️ And their interest is genuine, give good hugs, a little too loud for our cats but she means well! 💕💓❤️

This is brief recount of everyone, mostly focusing on activities we did together but knowing them as people obviously made a big impression on me! 💕💓❤️

Leo/Caps are people I met since I finished college/working now, they’re my two admins on the blog actually! 💕💓❤️So internet friends, but I really click with and they’re soothing + fun to be around when I’m home/anywhere! 💕💓❤️

Sag/Taurus is also another internet friend, I’ve known her for a year now? But man, every conversation is an adventure and she’s so fun to be around! 💕💓❤️ Also very sweet and an extremely kind person, in a fire sign kind of way. Which means a lot of gawking from me and very loud laughs. But yes! 💕💓❤️ Very good people! 💕💓❤️

I do have friends from work... but well we’re not close enough for me to actually consider them good friends/talk about them personally? They’re nice! But I have yet to form a more positive opinion about them - it’s positive and negative, so I’ll see who survives and come through as a person I’d like to hang out with outside of work. 💕💓❤️

To Virgo/Pisces anon:

Here’s my best friend application do I make the cut please reply 💕💓❤️

#about me #phew this took a while to answer!#virgo/pisces anon #are we best friends now pls tell me #anon #asks

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