#i prefer to experiment and go by feeling whereas she's more into the chemistry of baking

[dragonanne]

I feel like a granny in the 1930s 👵🤣 I made a small batch of biscuits this morning without a recipe, and they actually came out fluffly and yummy!! They're not very golden on top or bottom, but that's because it's gluten-free flour, and for some reason that stuff has a hard time browning 🤷‍♀️

But yeah, that's my victory for the morning: I entered granny mode and made biscuits from scratch without the aid of a recipe ☺️

#my mom has finally reached the point where she accepts and thinks it's cool that a lot of times I don't use a recipe when I bake #for a long time it kind of frustrated her because it made it harder to duplicate things that turned out well 😂 #but it's not a point of contention or anything--she's just a recipe kind of person and I'm not #i prefer to experiment and go by feeling whereas she's more into the chemistry of baking #which is fair considering home ec was actually a part of what she studied in college #the ramblings of a dragon #personal #gluten-free baking #it's also free of soy dairy and peanuts too #we use bob's red mills 1 to 1 baking flour and it works great #seriously so proud of these biscuits 😂

[ru5t]

knowing your partner can potentially make writing together a lot easier !

– BASICS.

♡ NAME: Hannah

♡ PRONOUNS: she/her

♡  AGE: 25+

♡  TIME ZONE: CST (GMT -5)

–THREE FACTS.

♡ I moderate a(n overw.atch) twitch channel/community! It's good fun and very dear to me but also sooooo so frustrating, sometimes.

♡ When I was little I was convinced I was going to grow up to become a veterinarian. I do not think the level of schooling or the uhhhhh amount of strong stomach it takes is actually for me.

♡ I strongly suspect I have an anxiety disorder and ADHD(? or a similar symptom set) but have no official diagnoses. At any rate, executive dysfunction you bitch.

–EXPERIENCE.

♡   HOW LONG (MONTHS / YEARS?): I have been on tumblr since 2011 but I've been storytelling/rping basically since like. ... You know how most kids act out their imaginative play? I did a looooooooottttt of "explaining" (/narrating, whatever you want to call it) and very little physical playing-things-out. Yes, I know what that is a common early indicator of. I'm unpacking that one shhhhh.

♡   PLATFORMS YOU’VE USED: uhhhh paper (as in i'd pass a notebook back and forth with school friends), IMVU, dA, various dms, twitter, forums, tumblr, a chatroom i forgot the name of we'd use for tumblr 'events', discord, wire

♡   BEST EXPERIENCE: Actually just the experience of rp in general. I have learned a lot through writing and the people who gave me grace in the process of it.

–MUSE PREFERENCES.

♡   MASCULINE OR FEMININE: I don't think I have a preference, per se? But I do seem to gravitate toward guy canons, whereas my OC roster tends to be waaaay more fluid and diverse, but I don't think there's any particular reason for this? Just the pattern of characters who appeal to me tend to be dudes in popular media, I guess? I did almost write Liz from Hellb.oy and Nomi from Sens.e8, in addition to the other canon ladies I have on the multi+Kiri's blog.

♡  FLUFF, ANGST OR SMUT: I actually kind of like. what I will call exploring? You put two characters in a box. Sometimes you shake it, or put a blanket in there, but mostly you just.... see what happens. Also tho I'm the fluff queen ♥ Good angst/whump has to come from somewhere and go somewhere else, I don't like to force it or just throw it around without reason or consequence, if that makes sense? And I like smut in theory but I don't have a lot of practice and my comfort level is a verrry narrow ledge I'm working on building up better, because genuinely it seems fun and interesting.

♡   PLOTS OR MEMES: I enjoy a little bit of bg plotting but also sometimes just really want to completely wing it and feel out the chemistry before committing to anything. Once we have a ground floor I like to build (and spiral)!!! I struggle with doing a bunch of memes when there's no floor to stand on, it starts to get really challenging in an un-fun way, and I feel like it's repetitive and uninteresting to write and to read. If a dynamic never has footing it can never evolve, y'know? Gotta give me something, something has to stick at some point.

♡   LONG OR SHORT REPLIES: No preference! Even when I start out 'short' I find I often end up unspooling into longer stuff but it doesn't have to I'm just wordy. I don't care if I consistently get shorter stuff back, as long as it suits the like. Yes, and. of it all. As long as there's something to work forward from I'm chillin!

♡   BEST TIME TO WRITE: I don't have a conscious preference but I do seem to have more success in early morning hours. No idea what that's about.

♡ ARE YOU LIKE YOUR MUSE(S): Sometimes. A lot of them get teeny tiny bits and pieces of my views or opinions. I have never felt more Seen by a show than when Luke Pat.terson ghost-apparitioned into my life, even if his One Thing is not my One Thing, but we don't have to unpack that. Me 'n Henry have some childhood traumas in common (except he lives in a fairytale where he gets a thing I don't get) but I don't know that he's particularly like me. Maddy did super duper on a technicality start out as a form of self insert, but it's complicated because also super duper on a technicality so did her mom (who actually existed first! which is rare. Normally I build center-out but this time it was a generation back and Tech just sort of happened, which was crazy and fun), and they both really migrated away from that sooo quickly that it's weird to me to think that was ever even technically true. In the long run Maddy got more of 'me' than Mayhem ever did but it has always been in a hyperbolic and/or metaphorical way. She's definitely grown with me, which has been an Experience and a half. All of them, by virtue of being written by me, are subject to my sense of humor in the narrative parts of the writing, whether they would think it's funny or not.

#c:\\work>dir h:\ ooc* //.hnh .lve:bite/

[theinsanecrayonbox]

i have finally found time to watch it! here we go fam. (for those just tuning in, She-Hulk was my #1 favorite non-Xmen character i loved i growing up, so i have many opinions and expectations going in here)

so potato seed opening and 4th wall break, great start. Tatiana makes a great Jen...not sure about She-Hulk yet... the ship causing the car crash, less stupid than i thought it’d be. Bruce just accidentally bleeding on Jen and she Hulks out, stupid; i hope t hey fix/better explain that later, because no that was dumb. if all it took was a little Hulk blood to infect someone vampire style, we’d have way more Hulks in NYC and S’kaar.

Tony built Bruce a club house? that’s sweet.

oh so accidental bleeding AND radiation caused it huh? haha yeah no. ok, you’re gonna say they share the blood relation, thus why it affects her too. sure ok. EXCEPT, if you’re going off the “Bruce’s dad did the experiments” thing...he didn’t exactly experiment on his sister too you know. then again, they might not be using that origin. they might be using something Gamma-demon related and i know NOTHING about any of that because it seems dumb to me. the reason why Jen’s Hulking was different to Bruce’s was because she was passively infected whereas he was actively. this is just saying she’s better than him? i just...idk...just keep watching KP

yeah Bruce, if you bleeding on anything makes Hulks, you shouldn’t bleed anymore. so no more fighting.

i do really like Jen and Bruce’s chemistry though, you can tell they’re related and have known each other forever.

not into the montage music. personal preference.

yeah this Hulk fight is just siblings fighting.

and suddenly random Titania??? uh...ok.

and yeah...i got a feeling i’m not going to like the scoring of this series...

pfft that post-credit scene was cute. i do like Tatiana, maybe she can pull this off well.

but, overall, not that bad of a start. is it the “classic origin” people claim it to be? pft, no, not really. but it is working...mostly...for the moment.

#kp watches stuff #spoilers

[jkrobertson]

as both a ulquihime and ichihime shipper, what do you like about both ships?

This is probably way more than you asked for, but here you go: As a preface: I watched the anime for the first time in the early 2010s, binging it until it ended in 2012, then set the series down until I picked up the manga around the beginning of 2016. During that time, I was not involved in the fandom AT ALL. When episode 3 came out and Orihime and Ichigo saved Sora’s soul, I decided I wanted them to be together. Then things changed. Ulquiorra captured my attention, and the Orihime was spending all her time with him, and I could see it. I could see it and I didn’t hate it. Ulquiorra was terrifying and seemingly unstoppable, but he was hot. I couldn’t hate the idea of him and Orihime together. But then, the protagonist came back and somehow asspulled himself back to life and Ulquiorra died, and with him, any idea of Orihime and him becoming more. So I regrouped and cheered for Ichihime and was elated when the epilogue came out.

But I never, ever, forgot about Ulquiorra.

When the final arc was starting to wind down, I decided that where canon ended was never going to be enough of the Bleach universe for me, so I started dipping my toes into the fandom. In the beginning, I alternated between which of these ships was my OTP. There was a time when I liked both ships equally. There was a long time after chapter 686 came out when I was still all about getting more Ichihime.

But I still couldn’t forget Ulquiorra.

These days, I like Ulquihime more, largely in part because it was never and will never be resolved. That open end is fuel for my imagination, whereas Ichihime has their happy ending. I can be satisfied with that, even though I never got a comprehensive story.

Now, to FINALLY get to your ask, what do I like about both ships:

Ichihime

General:

The canon OTP

The looks. The softness in their gazes when they look at each other. The fire in his eyes when he resolves to protect her. The adoration in her eyes when he makes a good decision.

The way they worry about each other.

The way Ichigo can relax and be the sweet, loving boy around her that he was with Masaki before her death stole his innocence. The way that Orihime is inspired to invest in herself and learn how to be strong enough to be an asset to him instead of a liability; to meet him at his level, instead of bringing him down to hers. Their bond is not performative. It is quiet, slow building, and strong. It feels healthy and organic and it makes me comfortable.

They are also physically and aesthetically compatible. To put it in animal husbandry terms, they make a good breeding pair. To put it in more pleasant terms, they are a good-looking couple. I want them to make the sweet, sweet love, and it doesn’t take a lot of imagination to consider the possibilities.

Although they are not as dynamic as other ships, I don’t find them dull. I think they are the opposite of dull, really. He thinks she is wonderful and mysterious and a good confidant and source of moral support, but he also thinks she is funny and they share taste in manga. She thinks he is cool and hilarious and worthy of admiration. They stick up for each other and gently tease each other. I prefer this kind of dynamic to a confrontational, bickering, competitive one between lovers. I have had both kinds of relationships IRL, and I would not wish the bantering one upmanship type on my worst enemy. I find it exhausting, demoralizing, and abusive. Give me a more soft spoken kind of love any day of the week.

The fandom:

The passion in the pre-canon days that went into analyzing the interactions between the characters - there were a lot of excellent arguments presented that helped me feel validated in shipping them before Kubo gave the ultimate validation.

There are a lot of really good ichihime fics (been a long time since I read one - now that ichihime is canon I don’t have to wonder about what could have been and just be satisfied by what is) and a fair amount of super cute artwork.

Ulquihime

General:

The other canon OTP/my favorite OTP

IT IS TABOO, NEED WE SAY MORE? Lol jk

THE AESTHETIC - monster/cinnamon roll; black/auburn; pure princess/devil; maiden/mercenary - all high drama/high beauty archetypes

THE CHEMISTRY IS FIRE - while it never even comes close to anything as obvious as flirtation, the body language between them - the proximity, the posturing, the way he stands between her and any rival for her attention, the way she drops her guard and makes her body vulnerable to his despite being aware of the danger… It’s like watching a tango. The tension between them is always strung tight and delicious. Also, it is projection on my part here, but Ulquiorra isn’t interested in anything, ever, EXCEPT ORIHIME. Who wouldn’t want hot goth daddy’s full attention? Especially a fair maiden who has, for all intents and purposes, thrown away her old life in a noble sacrifice and has made peace with that, who finds herself in a strange, hostile new world with only said hot goth daddy (HGD) to talk to and tend to her needs. If she were to stay in that situation, I can only imagine the ways she might adapt to make her life more tolerable, including, but not limited to, experimenting with HGD and fantasizing about him.

THE LITERARY TROPES - I really don’t need to say more here, do I?

The huge effect they had on each other - people often take lifetimes to learn the deep lessons they taught each other in a short time.

THE WHAT MIGHT HAVE BEENS - The tragedy of Ulquiorra’s potential redemption and Orihime’s potential alternative destiny being lost to the sands of Hueco Mundo is both sorrowful and poetic as hell.

The unending What ifs that can be explored with these two is inspiring, which leads me to...

The fandom:

THE ART!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OMG THE ART!!! THE FICSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!! Overall it’s sexier in this ship in regards to art and fics.

The community is small but just happy to still be alive, and is overall really lovely.

To sum up, there is a lot to love about both ships. Ichihime is a lovely, hopeful ship that has fulfilled its destiny. Ulquihime is a darker, enthralling ship that is ripe for the fandom to rekindle and ignite. Ichihime is Dvorak’s New World Symphony: Largo, and Ulquihime is Vivaldi’s Four Seasons: Winter. Both are good. Both have substance. They are different flavors, different timbres, different themes, and I love them both (but obviously one a little more than the other).

#asks #jkrobertson school of thought #ulquihime #ichihime

[norgestan]

For the ask game: Jorge x Nora (😏) and Dounia x Amira N.?

jorge x nora: ship it

what made you ship it?: nora and jorge's friendship was undoubtedly the most unexpected thing about s3 and it was a nice surprise! their first scene came at a time where the watching experience was a little bit dull (but the worst thing was always the tag LOL) and it was sweet to see two characters who barely interacted with each other build a cute, friendly dynamic. i've always liked the girl x boy squad dynamics in eskam: i was a big viri x lucas enthusiast and i wish they'd been friends for more than uhhhh ten minutes in s2, of course i love eva x lucas as well and amira and hugo always was a sweet sight to see.

if i'm being honest... this is what did it for me LOL

it's such an intimate shot and sooo charged with romantic tension and i was SOLD.

what are your favorite things about the ship?: i liked that, in a season that presented us with very narrative/theme heavy dynamics such as noriquel and norandro, we also got an easy going friendship for nora. and it was nice that they used two aspects who made them different than their og counterparts (and relate to the actors themselves) to make them bond! it was a nice idea to include such a sweet platonic bond to give us more miquel red flags instead of going the easy route and making a love triangle with alejandro, because instead of reusing a stupid trope that would take away from the message of the season they made it very clear that miquel was chronically insecure and that it wasn't an acceptable or justifiable behavior in any way.

i also love that, whereas singing was something noora did once around william to (try to) convince us that she was starting to like him, singing is just something intrinsic to nora. yes she does sing to miquel twice in the season, and there's also moments with alejandro throughout all seasons, but it's something that she likes to do and has a passion for and teaming up with jorge to put up a show was a nice way to portray that, divorced from any romantic strings. yes, nora had a YT channel too, but i'm glad that they drove the point across in the show itself too. and i love that such a fun part of the season also ties in with the themes: miquel wants to make nora's passion for music/singing their thing, and won't recognize that she is her own person and allowed to do things outside of their relationship, and that's why he feels constantly threatened by jorge. it's just another thing that makes s3 so good and satisfying to watch.

is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?: judging by the fact that i'm the only person who ships them... LOL. i guess an unpopular opinion is that i don't really see a canon future for them? there's an AU somewhere where these two together is a cool thing that makes sense, but it shall remain a crackship until then. i don't know how popular this sentiment is, but i would've preferred a norge endgame to the lackluster "closure" eva and jorge got. but that's just on s4 not being a good season, which is not even an opinion, just a Fact(tm).

dounia x amira: ship it

what made you ship it?: it was mainly the fact that mariam and hajar's chemistry is really good, but there's the precedent of bisexual!amira thanks to amiris, and then also how dounia shares more attributes with yousef than dani does. her being part of the balloon squad, having a unique bond with amira due to their way to relate to each other's experiences, having different takes on their faith and how to apply it to their daily lives, etc. there's also so many parallels to crisana moments that are just hard to ignore.

what are your favorite things about the ship?: i liked the beginning of s4, where it was clear that amira could be genuinely honest and herself around dounia compared to her other friends, which not only sets their dynamic apart but also it's just nice to see amira loosen up and really speak her mind. i like that while dounia is very strong and opinionated, she is a great listener and even on the places where she disagrees with amira she was understanding and even encouraging of her. also i'm a SUCKER for their height difference... it's top tier.

is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?: that i prefer kasira to them. i KNOW like 3 people think like me on this and i think it's fair LOL

#skam españa #answered #ty jenn for the ask!! <3<3

[everbecomesreal]

Someone just posted that they see MCU canon Steve as bisexual but the idea that MCU canon Tony is bisexual is ridiculous.

I mean, really? That is such a hypocritical viewpoint.

Firstly if we look solely as canon both are straight.

If we are scrounging for breadcrumbs, then Tony is the one who is affectionate and flirtatious with people of both genders. Tony is the one with the promiscuous past where it’s implied he experimented. There is a real tension and hint of something more in the scenes between Tony and Loki, whether you see it as a battle of egos, or a deep seated animosity or romance is entirely up to you but there is definitely something electric about that scene. By contrast his relationship with Bruce is soft and relatively insecure with more touching than most other characters get who interact with him. Then again in the scenes between Tony and Stephen Strange in Infinity War we get a similar type of tension to the one’s with Loki in Avengers Assemble. They mirror each other very closely. The character Tony interacts with who most supports the theory that Tony might be bisexual is Justin Hammar. The implication is that they have known each other for years and in their scenes to my eyes they have the kind of love/hate chemistry that would be really unhealthy if it were turned into an actual relationship. They never state that they could have had a fling or been in a relationship, but the behaviour is not unlike two exes trying to one up each other by how well they are doing now.

It certainly isn’t conclusive, but there are enough breadcrumbs there to justify a headcanon. The person he has the most chemistry with is clearly Pepper who is amazing, the love of his life, and who has killed 12% of all the villains in the MCU so is arguably the most successful superhero too. This is why he marries her. While Tony is definitely not gay, you don’t stop being bisexual because you are in a monogamous relationship with someone of the opposite gender, so it is possible for him to be a bisexual man married to a woman. It is a little squinty to see Tony as bisexual, but only a little.

Whereas with Steve, I just don’t see it. Honestly the way he’s played by Chris Evans he comes across as either asexual or straight, because he was clearly in love with Penny in a romantic, let’s grow old together way, and later he had a real chemistry with Natasha. Again like the Loki/Tony and Bruce/Tony scenes I think they are written without a romantic pairing in mind, but there is a chemistry there, especially in the scene at Sam’s house in TWS and in Endgame.

The two people Steve is most often paired with in fandom are Bucky and Tony, and honestly having watched the films several times I have never seen anything that indicates Steve having romantic feelings towards either of them. I think people paired him with Bucky because it was convenient. If you look at the first avenger, from the very first scenes Bucky is acting like an older more responsible, less rash older brother. He takes care of Steve in an older sibling type way, and as the film continues and Steve matches/surpasses Bucky physically that dynamic evolves in the same way sibling dynamics do between adolescence and adulthood to become more equal. Not to mention they’ve been acting like brothers since they were very tiny, and if you act like siblings with someone, regardless of whether or not you are related to them, often you develop the same aversion to seeing them in a sexual way as with blood siblings. It’s why siblings who have never met are more likely to be attracted to each other sexually than adopted siblings. Another relationship in the MCU that is similar to this in terms of the sibling dynamic being portrayed really well is the one between Tony and Rhodey as well as the Thor and Loki relationship.

There is so much Stucky content out there that I have really tried to see the romance in the pairing so I can enjoy it. I have rewatched the films and read some of the fanfiction but the pairing just feels like incest to me and it squicks me out.

With the Steve/Tony romantic angle. I never saw it from either side. I don’t think either character saw the other for them self instead of the bundle of expectations they had until fairly late on. I don’t think we saw Tony develop a real relationship and respect for Steve until Age of Ultron where it seemed established, even if we saw flashes of it from Tony’s side in the scene when the helecarrier was being attacked in Avengers Assemble. I don’t think there is a scene where Steve speaks to Tony with the respect you show another human being until Endgame. Without that level of connection there can’t be a romantic connection.

Honestly I think there is more evidence in canon for Steve being asexual, but not necessarily a romantic than for him being attracted to men. With his aversion to going on a date and his continued attraction to a woman who had completely moved on and was so impaired by dementia that it would be difficult to have consensual intercourse. The discomfort with which he reacts to Natasha when she kisses him in public or when she pretends they’re engaged at the Apple store could be because he sees her as a friend, because he has feelings for her that he doesn’t feel comfortable expressing, or because sex makes him uncomfortable and he isn’t interested.

Again, in MCU canon both men are straight, but if we’re analysing details for hints of other sexuality’s, there is a possibility that Tony is bisexual and a possibility that Steve is asexual from what we are given in canon but both are a long way from having enough info to confirm. Steve as interested in men just doesn’t quite seem supported in the original material to me.

I think sometimes if you consume a lot of both canon and fandom material it is possible to merge the two in your head, to the extent that the character you see doesn’t bare a lot of resemblance to the one shown on screen or in the text. I think this might be what happened with particularly Steve being shown as bisexual a lot in fandom, because people have consumed a lot of content and created a lot of headcanons around it when they rewatch the films they apply their “knowledge” from fandom and either see what they want to see or get cross their preferred pairing isn’t obvious in the film, or the sequels.

TL;DR both characters are straight in canon but there is more justification in terms of breadcrumbs for Tony being bisexual than Steve.

[youngboy-oldmind]

ALBUM REVIEW: The Lost Boy

“Try to take a walk up in my shoes/A n**** rapping like I really got something to prove, Cause motherf****er, I do/I climb hills, n***** was sleeping, on Nyquil/ Paint a picture vivid, dawg, on everything, my life's real”

Overall Thoughts

Maryland rapper YBN Cordae plants a solid footprint in the rap game on his debut album The Lost Boy: a 45 minute masterpiece filled with excellent storytelling and production combined with a unique style that proves he’s definitely an up and comer to look out for in years to come.

The Lost Boy was my favorite rap/hip-hop release of 2019. Cordae’s first studio album is contender for one of my favorite debut albums ever. In my opinion, related artists’ (Chance the Rapper, Logic, Bas, J Cole, Kendrick, Amine) debut album’s fall to The Lost Boy. And at 21, his debut releases at an age younger than everyone in that group. To have an excellent project at such a young age is another feat on its own.

One commonality I notice with debut albums is that new artists tend to sound like their biggest influencers; the biggest culprit being Logic. But Cordae stands out with his own style that doesn’t sound too similar to any of his numerous influences. His delivery, word choice, and flow (while not always mind blowing), is not a carbon copy of a rapper from the 90s-00s. Here, Cordae’s sound is his own.

His pen game on this project is consistently above average, but rarely mind blowing. Tracks like “We Gone Make It” and “Thousand Words” exhibit his strongest lyricism. However, Cordae’s story telling abilities are consistently powerful. Tracks like “Bad Idea”, “Thanksgiving”, “Nightmares Are Real”, “Family Matters” all have Cordae illustrating his experiences. He emphasizes his perspective as a young man who’s finding himself through all these experiences. Even his most bragging and banger tracks still feature great humility and storytelling elements, the stand out being “Broke as F***”.

The features on The Lost Boy are all top notch. Cordae includes Chance the Rapper, Ty Dollar $ign, Pusha-T, Anderson .Paak, and Meek Mill, all of whom bring elite verses to their features. It’s even better that the guests don’t completely outshine Cordae. Cordae brings enough weight to each song that its not completely engulfed by the feature. Songs like French Montana’s “No Shopping”, Logic’s “Homicide”, Chance’s “Handsome” all suffer from a feature that outclasses the main artist. But Cordae goes toe to toe with each feature.

I should also mention the two skits, “Sweet Lawd” and “Grandma’s House”. Both are pretty good as far as skits go. I can’t help but assume they were influenced by Kanye West’s “I’ll Fly Away” from The College Dropout, both of which sound very reminiscent to. They display Cordae’s singing abilities and soulful sound. And its touching to hear Cordae’s grandmother on the latter track.

Overall, I can’t really find a weak spot on this project. The runtime, theme/tone, uniqueness, production, and lyricism are all excellent. As far as debut albums go, Cordae made has created one of the best I’ve ever heard.

Album Breakdown

The common theme throughout this project is Cordae’s experiences being young and lost in a chaotic world. I love this theme because it doesn’t limit the scope about his topics. He can make fun tracks, political commentary, and emotional deep cuts while staying tonally consistent.

1. Wintertime

"Wintertime” features a smooth, mellow, jazzy beat; The vibe feels like a instrumental off of J Cole’s 4 Your Eyez Only. Cordae introduces himself, compares where he started to where he’s at now, and discusses some everyday plagues that stress him (anxiety, maintaining success, pressure to appear problem-free) while also aiming for the top and hoping nothing he creates fades away. Great intro.

2. Have Mercy

This next track is lyrically nothing deep or profound, just a banger track with a dope instrumental. The echoy, bassy sound that develops on the last leg of the song is especially great. I also found Cordae’s music video technique interesting. He released two videos, Path A and Path B, that illustrate opposite tones. Path A brings more zainy, flamboyant visuals while Path B is much more dark and eerie. I personally think Path A is the more appropriate for the track. Overall, not a bad banger.

3. Sweet Lawd- Skit

This skit features Cordae singing the hook off “Have Mercy” over a church-like piano. As I mentioned early, strongly reminds me of “I’ll Fly Away” off Kanye West’s The College Dropout. Cordae’s voice is soulful and pleasant to listen to as well. The first gospel-esque track.

4. Bad Idea

Chance the Rapper and Cordae team up to create one of the best songs on the album. They both deliver great verses, Chance’s middle verse being the best. Here they talk about the downsides of Home and the impact those experiences had on them. They borrow the beginning chorus lines “It might not be such a bad idea if I never went home again” from Gil Scott-Herman’s “Home is Where the Hatred Is” and heavily styled like Kanye West’s “My Way Home”. Although Cordae is the main singer on the chorus, he layers his voice to make it sound like an ensemble of singers. A great stylistic choice. And the heavy piano X light strings perfectly end the track. Between the strings at the end, the Kanye West sample, and Chance’s (a huge fan, supporter, and protege of Kanye) involvement, I definitely smell influence from West’s sophomore album Late Registration.

5. Thanksgiving

“Thanksgiving”, the first deep cut on the album, has Cordae introducing a girl to his family during Thanksgiving. However, she’s fake and never stays around, making him question their relationship while remaining hopeful they can maintain it. Cordae demonstrates his powerful storytelling abilities. The overall mellow tone in the production allows his lyrics to fit perfectly in the instrumental; it doesn’t outshine but it doesn’t get over shadowed either.

6. RNP

Anderson .Paak has collaborated with Andre 3000, J. Cole, Rhapsody, Kendrick Lamar, BJ The Chicago Kid, Pusha-T, and Q-Tip, so I wasn’t surprised when I saw Cordae would be collaborating with the talented singer. However, I couldn’t prepare for the amazing back-and-forth chemistry between them. You wouldn’t think when listening to them trade bars that they have a 12 year age difference between them. Also fun fact: J. Cole produced the track.

Both these artists are just having fun over a bouncy beat, talking about the “problems” they’ve experienced being rich. Definitely be favorite fun track so far.

7. Broke As F***

This is tied for my favorite track on the album. Cordae’s lyrics aren’t necessarily the most complex and deep, but he brings such a indescribable energy to his storytelling. He basically tells the story from him being a baby, being in high school appreciating hip hop, where he came from, and where he’s going to go. The great thing here is that its not solely bragging about his possessions. Its a commentary on what he’s GAINED. This adds a touch of humility. And at the end, he comments on how he’s lost, still searching, and doesn’t “really have a lot of answers”, tying into the theme of the album. Perfect.

The spacey instrumental on the chorus, the beat drop after the first line of the first verse, and the beat change midway through makes this one of the best instrumentals on the album. And the ending drums transition to the next song perfectly.

8. Thousand Words

“Thousand Words” has some best verses on the album. Here Cordae talks about the toxicity of social media and how people create false perceptions to hide true pain. While already an intriguing topic, Cordae goes a step further by admitting he’s not holier than thou. He admits everyone lowkey wants to be a little famous, and nobody wants to be “nameless”. I love that. It’s easier to say Instagram and Twitter are toxic (Logic on Confessions of a Dangerous Mind). But to admit there is some validity and positivity to social media...very profound for someone so young. My favorite lines are:

“Living in this false reality that's in this picture gallery/ Based on a n***** profile, we guessin' salary/ The lifestyle you advertise was quite strategized/ Make a minimal amount and then we maximize/ These n***** cappin' with lies how they capitalize/ Creating they own perceptions, what a massive facade/ Digital marketing schemes even broader regime/ Live how you want on the internet, who thought of this thing?”

9. Way Back Home

Ty Dollar $ign stands out on the feature, talking about not letting fame and success pull him from reality. Cordae sings the chorus and most of his verse. Admittedly, I wasn’t a fan of Cordae’s parts; It felt underwhelming. But the instrumental and Ty’s verse carry a significant part of the song. I especially loved the high pitched melodic voice that pops in the beat throughout the song. I also love the sci-fi, techy “WORP” effect throughout the instrumental. But ultimately, this felt more like Ty’s song than Cordae’s.

10. Grandma’s House- Skit

Between “Grandma’s House” and “Sweet Lawd”, I prefer this skit. The harmonious vocals that echo Cordae’s grandma’s vocals give off an amazing gospel vibe. The simplistic yet soulful and intimate aura of this skit makes it one of my favorite interlude-skits off any rap album.

11. Been Around

Another mellow song on the project, “Been Around” has Cordae talking about the development of his career and how he’s going to keep moving forward and not let doubters or bad situations slow him down. I like the chorus more than the verses, but overall its not a bad track. It maintains the tone of the album and flexes Cordae’s pen game a little.

12. Nightmares Are Real

This was the most intriguing collaboration on the album. Pusha-T and Cordae have very different sounds and styles; Pusha-T brings much more aggressiveness whereas Cordae is softer. Cordae’s hardest verses don’t compare to Pusha-T’s baseline intensity. Although they don’t demonstrate strong chemistry, they both bring solid verses. Both tell stories of how they started in the rap game, however, Pusha-T’s wordplay and lyricism is a step above Cordae’s. He talks about dealing with selling crack while developing his skills in rapping. Particular set of lines had me shook.

“Asterisk, skipped school, recorded with The Neptunes/ We was makin' high school classics/ Before I took a kilo and I wrapped it, I rapped it/ Around the funeral with the casket/ Coke avalanche, like a landslide/ Only grew my hair this long because my man died/”

I don’t wanna go too far into explaining these lyrics cus genius will do better job. But Pusha-T brings fire to this track. The tone of the instrumental matches Pusha-T’s intensity as well. As solid of a collaboration this is, its not in my top 3 collabs. That goes to show how amazing this project is.

13. Family Matters

"Family Matters” is tied with “Broke as F***” for my favorite song on The Lost Boy. Cordae talks about the stress of witnessing family traumas and difficulties while experiencing his own success. He expresses feelings of guilt and selfishness when his family hides things from him so he can focus on achieving his goals. He talks about abandonment from baby daddies, aunt’s raising kids that aren’t theirs, a cousin in an abusive relationship, a cousin addicted to xanax, and another aunt who’s a prostitute. All of this is happening while he’s worried about “plays and streams”. It’s an interesting sentiment. Is it selfish to focus on yourself when your family has a load of obstacles and difficulties? Every time he succeeds he has to look back at where he came from and be reminded his family does not share his accomplishments. Nearly brought me to tears when I first heard it.

As I already stated, lyrically this is one of Cordae’s top songs. Arin Ray brings a choir on the chorus that sounds amazing, adding to the gospel sound sprinkled throughout the album. And the light violin strings at the end encapsulate the emotional turmoil Cordae expresses.

14. We Gone Make It

Another top track, “We Gone Make It”, features a collab with Meek Mill to make political/social commentary on todays world and encourage others to keep pushing to succeed. Unlike the other three collaborations “Bad Idea”, “Way Back Home”, and “Nightmares are Real”, Meek Mill’s verses are actually equal with Cordae. Although I’m not a huge fan of Mill, he brings in a succinct, powerful 12 bars and a hook so dope he, as Cordae puts it, had to “sing it twice”. Also fun fact: Cordae used a modified version of the first verse on H.E.R’s “Lord is Coming (Remix)”.

Instrumentally, the beat accompanies the message without overshadowing it. The piano melody and vocal chops throughout mix well with the verses. I personally love the piano keys in the final minute. It adds an aura of delicacy to a song with such an intense message.

15. Lost & Found

In the perfect closing track “Lost & Found”, Cordae displays pride, stating “I was lost boy, now I’m found”. Over a bumpy, bassy beat with epic trumpet harmonies, he comments on everything throughout the project. However, now he has assurance he’s not lost nor insecure from his experiences. And he knows things are going up from here. Like the rest of the album, he’s lyrically above average, reflecting on his life while introducing a fun, braggadocios vibe. Kinda like a “the balls in your court” to the rest of the rap game. Loved it.

Final Thoughts

I look forward to Cordae’s next album. This was a near perfect debut solo album. At 21 years old, Cordae displays strong lyricism and production skills. His ability to story-tell and introspect indicate incredible feats in career. The lowest parts of this project are still amazing, and the high points put this project as my favorite of the year. I don’t know how else to say it. The rap game better watch out for this Maryland born “Lost Boy”. If The Lost Boy indicates the trajectory of his future, Cordae will have the crown in no time.

Top 3 Tracks:

1) Family Matters

2) Broke As F***

3) Bad Idea

Overall Grade: A+

#music review #album review #hip hop review #hip hop #cordae

[pseudonymsobriquet]

Tag Meme!

Rules: Pick 5 shows, then answer the following questions. Don’t cheat. Tag some people.

Thanks for tagging me, @boostthatgold and @ninja-crybaby~! Sorry it took me so long to finally do... (>~<)

Carole and Tuesday

One Punch Man

Parasyte: The Maxim

Fullmetal Alchemist

Puella Magi Madoka Magica

Who is your favourite character in 2? Its very close between Genos and Saitama, but I think Genos wins by a hair (no pun intended). The borg is so emotional and loving and I just wanna give him a hug.

Who is your least favourite character in 1? Oh Cybelle, definitely. She’s a horrible person. Which is a damn shame since her song “La Ballade” is an absolute bop.

What is your favourite episode of 4? Episode 54, “Beyond the Inferno”. [SPOILERS AHEAD] Riza seeing through Envy’s disguise with ease, Roy confronting Hughes killer, a discussion on how hatred only breeds hatred and what makes someone human. The sympathy and pity you feel for Envy... there are so many great moments in this one episode and it’s one that I always remember to this day despite not having seen the series in at least four years. 

What’s your favourite season of 5? It only has one season, so I guess it’s season one by default lol. It was one hell of a ride for sure. Lots of interesting discussions and horrifying reveals, and does a great job at a “genre sike” by being relatively family friendly until episode three where everything gets turned upside down and you realise it’s a psychological horror despite the cute art style.

Who is your favourite couple in 3? Shinji and Murano were the only official couple in the show, but I definitely didn’t ship it. Kinda felt like you could take Murano completely out of the story and everything still would have been the same. Honestly, Shinji and Kana had better chemistry, but Kana needed to work on some of her stuff before that could happen. A relationship with Shinji and Hideo could have been interesting, too.

Who is your favourite couple in 2? I’m a huge fan of Saitama and Genos as a couple! They both help each other to work on their issues and become a better person. Genos helped bring Saitama out of his depression and to be more emotive, and open up to people, eventually leading to a happier more enjoyable life and him gaining a network of friends to rely on. Saitama in turn helped Genos to overcome his uncontrollable rage and to think more before acting so he doesn’t end up hurt as much. Also he taught him to focus on things other than revenge (though that may have lead to a bit of an obsession with Saitama himself lol). Every domestic interaction between the two seems natural and effortless, and if one is hurt the other goes wild which is an A+ trope that I just love lmao. I could write a damn essay on why these two are perfect for each other honestly. 

What is your favourite episode of 1? The last episode! It’s the end of a series, but the start of something great for all the characters. Also the Miraculous Seven Minutes was absolutely phenomenal and I’m so glad I watched it in the show before I listened. I also cried like four times during that seven minutes because of what it meant to the characters, and I don’t often cry at things! So this show making me cry four times in seven minutes is a feat of its own! Watch Carole & Tuesday folks, you won’t regret it. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, and you’ll wanna bop along with the characters during every song.

What is your favourite episode of 5? Ooft, Episode 6, “This Just Can’t Be Right”. The absolute bombshell that was dropped towards the end was just horrifying in every way and I honestly didn’t see it coming. I think this was the point that both the characters and the audience realised exactly what a horrifying ordeal being a magical girl really was. Episode 8, “I was Stupid... So Stupid” is a very close second, and gives us another bombshell reveal I didn’t see coming that ramped up the horror even more. I won’t give any spoilers on these episodes tho ‘cause it’s one of those “it’s better if you experience it yourself” moments. What I will say is that Madoka Magica is a psychological horror at its heart, don’t let the cutesy art style fool you. 

What is your favourite season of 2? Season 1 by a long shot. I’ve personally seen the entirety of season 1 at least six times over, whereas I watched Season two once as it released. I enjoyed the second season and would love a third season to release, but season one was superior in every way. Maybe it’s because I feel like less happened in season two? Or that there was more focus on human interaction and relationships in the first? Or perhaps it’s because I really saw myself in season one Saitama? Whatever the reason, I could still happily watch season one like six more times.

How long have you watched 1? Carole & Tuesday only released last year, but I started watching when there were only three episodes out subbed! From there I kept watching it weekly as it released, and I’m so glad I decided to watch it because it quickly became one of my fave animes of all time. 

How did you become interested in 3? I first heard about Parasyte when I was about sixteen? I’m sure I saw it on a list of great horror manga while I was looking for something new to read. I actually read quite far in but never finished because I had to study for exams then lost my place and just never went back. Then this year, a full nine years later, I saw the anime was on Netflix and I remembered just how much I’d loved reading what I did of it, so I started and finished it in three days lol. Turns out I wasn’t far from the end when I’d lost my place all those years ago. It brought back nostalgia of something I loved as a teen and I loved how well animated it was (even though it can look a little silly at times). I’d definitely recommend Parasyte to anyone interested in horror anme and manga.

Who is your favourite actor in 4? Edward Elric’s Japanese voice actress Romi Park was my fave. She has The Range. When she voices Ed, I honestly believe every emotion, every performance she gives. From a scared child to a hero saving the world, she does an amazing job. 

Which do you prefer: 1, 2, or 5? It’s gonna be a close one between Carole & Tuesday and One Punch Man, that’s for sure. One Punch Man was an anime where I saw myself in the main character and his journey through depression and not knowing what to do in life, and Carole & Tuesday made me feel emotions I haven’t felt in a very long time and stressed the importance of music and friendship. Although, considering I have the Carole & Tuesday songs on a playlist and know every word to them all, and the impact that the series finale (and the series as a whole) had on me, I’m going to have to say Carole & Tuesday win this round because of just how much it meant to me. 

If you could be anyone from 4, who would you be? Oh man, I’d wanna be Olivier. The strength, the confidence, the pizazz... I think Olivier is everything I wanna be lmao. 

Would a crossover between 3 and 4 work? Parasyte and Fullmetal Alchemist? Hell yeah, I’d love to see that crossover. Maybe the parasites in that world could be a type of homunculous or something? They both had the same idea of infiltrating the government for their own personal gain too.

Pair two characters in 1 who would make an unlikely but strangely okay couple? Gus and Flora would make a great couple, I could definitely see them getting together after the series ends. Carole and Tuesday would be great too, though they work just as well as friends.

Overall, which show has the better storyline, 3 or 5? Tricky, but I’d have to go with Parasyte. There were a lot of interesting moments and discussions in the series that pulled me in, like “what is humanity?” and “what makes someone human?” and “at what point is someone no longer human?” and “is it possible for humans and parasites to coexist?” Madoka Magica was a great series, had some great moments and asked some equally as interesting questions, but I think Parasyte pulled it off better in the end.

Which has better theme music, 2 or 4? Oooohhhh, that’s a tough one... One Punch Man or Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood... I just listened yo all the songs from both to try make up my mind and I’m still a bit lost, so let’s go by “what’s more memorable/makes me feel some kind of emotion?” FMA: “Again” by Yui and “Shunkan Sentimental” by Scandal are the only ones that seem familiar and that I can remember when they aren’t in front of me. I know I’ve heard them all (I watched the entire series) but to say it probably has more music, I actually remember very little of it. OPM on the other hand... I know most of the words to “The Hero” by JAM Project and it makes me feel so hyped up. “Apostle of Silence” by JAM Project in the second season is just as rad and memorable. Both of the ending themes are beautiful and emotional. And the first ending theme seems to be about Genos wishing Saitama would come home safe, while the season two’s ending is sung by Saitama’s voice actor and seems to be a reply to the first season’s ending theme? Absolutely gay and iconic, 10/10. Wow, OPM hands down has the best music then I guess lmao.  I tag anyone who sees this that wants to do it~! Have fun, guys~! <3 

#tag meme #@boostthatgold #@ninja-crybaby #@naughtylittleweeb

[thefudge]

‘aight i saw this movie finally (the pirated version, cuz i dont shill anymore) and

it was okay. chaotic and uncoordinated and clearly unplanned - i mean it reeks of “throw everything at the screen because we’re out of time” - but i enjoyed parts of it and i can see a good movie buried under all of this lost potential. in order to make TROS good, however, you’d have to rewrite the whole trilogy. you’d also have to rethink this world. i think the folks in charge committed a “prequels” error in thinking that the universe of star wars matters more than its characters. so you got all these kooky planets and alien species, and you’ve got side-quests and a dozen new characters/creatures, added without forethought or real stakes, just to show us how big the star wars playground is. whereas, going to a new location should be about the characters first, and the location second. lucas did the same in the prequels: crammed every frame with a million things because he had a thirst for his own universe, but at least he was passionate. disney is just calculated. 

i do think this movie’s better than the prequels lol, it’s just that it could have been proper good if they didn’t try to appease the fans so much and play it safe. i’ve written about kylo/ben’s death in other posts and what i think about his character. as for rey “palpatine”, ehhh. in the context of the movie i give them points for trying their best to sell it, but it would have been far FAR more powerful if she really was nobody. if you wanted a compromise, she could’ve been palpatine’s experiment or a clone, and that would’ve made her “nobody”, while also his creation. but i would’ve preferred it if she really had nothing to do with all of this BS. because a) it’s obvious they didn’t plan rey palpatine from the start, and b) if they did, it was very poor storytelling. the palpatine reveal should’ve happened in the second movie so that rey could actually react to it, so that the conflict about her dark lineage could be explored in depth. TLJ!rey seemed at peace with finding out she’s nobody, like that was her closure. to retcon that in the 3rd movie just because some folks didn’t like TLJ is cowardly. if they really wanted to do rey palpatine, they should’ve committed to it. idk which reviewer mentioned smth about how rey’s past ultimately was more important for these people than rey herself. they invested so much in this “secret” that they kind of forgot about her as a person. i wish these movies weren’t just her running around, mouth agape, chasing this illusory secret. TFA!rey, before she got dragged into this legacy shit, was far more interesting. rey skywalker is also just...really weak. i get what they were going for thematically, but again, the stronger message would’ve been: “i’m rey. just rey”. earlier she gave the same answer to that little girl in “burning man” village, but feeling sort of ashamed about it. now at the end she should’ve said it proudly. “i’m rey, just rey, and that’s enough.” but what do i know. old lady sigh

i liked some of the action sequences and the indie “a new hope” vibe of the resistance. i didn’t like the side-trips and all the macguffins, kerri russel’s character was...really unnecessary, i’m sorry, janna was fine, at least she made more sense in the story. and rose was shafted because of racist assholes on the internet. OLD LADY SIGH.

i liked the reylo interactions and their saber fights (when she stabbed him with his own saber? noiiiiice), but i think it would’ve been cooler if they’d kissed during one of those fights, actually. the kiss at the end was nice...but as always with these two, it felt very kindergarten to me. i’ve complained elsewhere that they keep making them act like uwu shy space babies. i would’ve liked a hate/love kiss mid-battle and for them to pull back sort of shocked but unrepentant. a lot of their fights had that kind of UST and i think that’s where they should’ve capitalized on it. but i guess that’s too sexy for disney. OLD LADY SIGH. i would’ve preferred a more sober moment at the end, like touching foreheads as he dies or smth, because lol it was inadvertently funny how quickly he died after they kissed, the tonal dissonance was aaall over the place. 

OH and finn/poe’s dynamic in this movie was weirdly belligerent and i didnt get it. maybe because these two didn’t get to spend enough time together in TFA or TLJ to set this up, but having them act like #married rebel veterans who’ve been together for years and resent each other was...weird. they jumped into this snippy, almost aggressive banter waaay too fast. i know folks think they should’ve let them be gay, and while i would not be opposed since they have a lot of chemistry....i...actually....maybe....ship finn with rey more.

yes folks, this movie actually made me ship finnrey more. 

i think it’s the fact that they finally addressed force-sensitive finn, although they did it in a pretty lame fashion. but at least they did (there were many missed opportunities where finn could’ve acted on his force-sensitivity. that scene where rey and kylo both wrestle-levitate that ship in the sky...and finn just watches from the sidelines...instead of trying to control it too...OLD LADY SIGH). anyway, rey and finn’s connection within the force was subtle and i liked it. i liked the unspoken yearning between them that felt a bit more mature here than in previous films. the final 2019 twist is that i’m tentatively back on finnrey (2015 me also liked them but i quickly lost interest when finn was infantilized and then put into a coma...). 

i DIDN’T like that finn/rose was totally forgotten (not a pair i ship but rose nearly died for him...wtf). and i also don’t think the finn/rey/poe trio works...as a trio. there was this painful scene towards the beginning of the movie where poe and rey started levelling playful insults at each other and it was awwwwfuuuuul. it felt like recycled marvel humor. and it got worse when it was the three of them bantering. they could have been a really fun trio if they had actually spent more time together in previous movies. here it felt really forced, sorry. 

oh yeah, the chewie medallion scene...less painful than i thought it would be. chewie mourning leia, though? oooouch, i felt that. probably only really heartfelt moment in this movie (i’ve written elsewhere how i think the ben/han moment was robbed of its weight, though i can see why people love it). 

in terms of comedy, though, hux’s death has to be number one.

anyway! glad this is over and done with. maybe now they’ll start telling star wars stories that don’t always involve the “empire” and the rebels or the fkin skywalkers. here’s to hoping. 

and whew, thank god for fanfics

#tros review #tros spoilers #tros #my thoughts #sw

[atopearth]

Pub Encounter Part 2 - Ryunosuke Yuze Route

HAHAHA omg, Ryunosuke seems like such a shy guy, he blushed when Shiori approached him and started talking to him hahaha. Omgg wow, I didn’t expect Hideaki to be 46!! He looks pretty young compared to the others lol! I guess he’s young at heart? Lolll. Shiori is so slow and silly, lmao when Ryunosuke helped her carry her shopping bags (since she nearly fell, lucky he catched her lol) and she was like, they’re my bags..Hahahaha, of course they’re yours, he’s just helping you carry it loll🤣🤣 It’s kinda cute that they just spontaneously enjoyed their day off together after that. Omgggg, Ryunosuke is the CEO for a lingerie chain?? How unexpected! Lmaooo when he ran away in his car when Shiori found out haahaha, why is he so cute lmao. I’m glad he was very upfront about his apology for how he acted, but I also think it was really nice how he made it clear to her his thoughts towards women and how he can’t find it within himself to trust them and view them positively. Although, I guess, like he said, it is kinda ironic when his job is entwined with women. However, he seems genuinely perplexed about women, I wonder what his past will be like? It’s nice to see Shiori understand that regardless of the fact that she’s a woman, they’re strangers after all, so him not trusting her is fine, so now they just need to be friends and learn to understand and trust each other! I think that’s a nice and positive attitude, I like that~

I feel like the creepy presence that threw a rock at Shiori when they walked home together is probably some jealous woman but yeah~ glad that incident kinda pushed forward their sharing of phone numbers haha. I feel like I’m learning so many surprising things about Ryunosuke, like dang, Ryunosuke at the arcade winning stuffed animals? I would love to see that! Lmao at Shiori begging him to get her one from a series she likes, and he gets her the whole thing lol. I gotta say, Ryunosuke liking cakes and sweet alcoholic drinks is so different from his image, now all I can think about is him happily eating cakes hahaha. Omggg, drunk Shiori attacked our innocent Ryunosuke that was just trying to take her back home!! I feel sorry for the her next day that had to live with those memories that she licked his lips or whatever because she liked the sweet scent from the drink he had loll. And she even started kissing him, and he reciprocated! Like danggg. I’m really liking their chemistry though. They’re obviously interested in each other, but they want to know more about each other and be friends first, and I think it’s great! He consults her on opinions of things he thinks about such as why people seek for eternity, and she had a common answer but I still liked how it was worded. People do want to leave a piece of themselves behind, and I think the idea of putting something intangible into something physical was a really neat way of saying it. We may not “exist” after our deaths, but we can still exist in other ways~!

It was leading to it so it was obvious, but dang, Ryunosuke got stalked by his old secretary… That’s tough… Especially when she only exhibited that behaviour after he became CEO, kinda crazy that it ended up involving the police and trial to get her to stay away from him though. That would be pretty traumatising huh? Really gotta admire Shiori for being undeterred and saying she’ll protect Ryunosuke haha, it’s really sweet, but at the same time I’m so scared of their safety. As usual, I love how upfront they are with their thoughts towards their relationship, and I’m glad they both admitted their feelings, but want to resolve this secretary stalker problem first before they progress further, which is understandable. Ryunosuke kissing her forehead was cute~~

Them sharing their homemade lunches on a bench was so adorable! So cute of them complimenting each other’s cooking hahaha. Honestly though, I feel like with how crazy Itodani was, it’s kinda anticlimactic and a bit unbelievable that she would just let go of it all after Ryunosuke confronted her and told her to back off and find someone she can truly love. Really can’t see how that opened her eyes, especially since she had been harassing him for a long time, and had even harassed his previous secretary too! So yeah, unbelievable but whatever lol. I really like how Ryunosuke likes to do things properly, especially when he gave her flowers and asked her to be his girlfriend. These things don’t necessarily need to be said all the time, but I think saying it really makes things more official and laid out properly to the other person, I think it’s really nice to communicate your intentions thoroughly. Unlike Yorihisa in the previous route, she really doesn’t need to guess how Ryunosuke is feeling because they’ve both been very upfront about it and I think that’s what I love about their relationship. 

Considering how polite of a guy Ryunosuke is to everyone, and it was only when Mamoru told him to be more casual with him did he change, really puts into perspective how sweet it is for him to tell Shiori himself that she should talk to him more casually since they’re not strangers anymore. With how much he consults her opinion on his work, she might as well just become his secretary loll. Lmao that he’s been unconsciously checking out her body all the time because he wants her to be the new poster girl of Torenia since the current one has no passion or love towards Torenia’s lingerie etc. LOL when he so boldly said he wanted to see her in her underwear hahahaha, like I know it’s for work but the way he so bluntly said it was funny hahaha. I also liked how when she was a bit embarrassed to wear it after eating, he said that “a love that couldn’t withstand something silly like that would be no love at all”, I honestly thought that was really sweet, especially since he said it like a matter of fact. Honestly, now that I’m on Ryunosuke’s route, I’m starting to really see how bad Yorihisa was, I just realised that for all the crappy things he did, Yorihisa never ever apologised! Whereas, for Ryunosuke, when he knew that his recent busy schedule affected their relationship, he told her that she should be honest with her feelings about it, and when she told him she got scared that they were growing apart, he very conclusively told her that their relationship isn’t that shallow, but he also apologised for making her feel like that with his absence. And I think that’s what is so great about a Ryunosuke tbh. He believes in their relationship and their feelings, but he also makes sure to apologise for making her feel insecure just because he wanted to surprise her with the new brand he was working on.

I knew Ryunosuke was dedicating the new brand to her, but aside from the fact I never thought he would actually call it Shiori, I find it so much more touching that he did it because he remembered that conversation they previously had about leaving something tangible behind as a piece of themselves. I thought that was really cool and thoughtful, it really shows how much Ryunosuke cares about what they talk about. As expected, after her complaints about her job etc, Ryunosuke finally made the move to propose to her and ask her to be his secretary so he could always see her at work and at home, which is so cute hahaha. I have to admit that it was so silly yet cute that Ryunosuke was adamant about living separately after marriage until they could properly move into their newly built home. He’s so formal about it all, but I think that’s a nice serious side of him. Although I prefer how sweet the best ending was, the good ending was really good too! Loved how proactive and bold Shiori was, and she even teased Ryunosuke just to see him blush since she thinks it’s so cute, and it’s also because of his blush that she kinda fell for him haha.

Overall, I really liked Ryunosuke’s route, I feel like it’s going to be my favourite tbh hahaha. Mainly because I feel like they were both very mature in their approach towards the relationship by always being honest, upfront and communicative. Sometimes she needs the push from him to be more honest about her feelings but I think that just speaks more towards his experience with handling people and relationships, so I think even if she can be a little less mature at times, it just kinda shows how she needs his support in that area to grow as a person, whereas he’s older so he knows how to better deal with things? Anyway, doesn’t matter because he’s a gentleman and she’s forward so they match well, and it’s a much more balanced relationship than with Yorihisa haha! I also think it’s rather refreshing that usually when it’s the CEO stereotype, the stories usually kinda flaunt how rich they are with the maids, big houses etc to show how capable they are, but Ryunosuke really seems like a normal person that is very hardworking and capable. He does everything by himself, such as moving houses with Shiori and cooking etc, he knows how to take care of himself and others, and is very considerate, but at the same time it never really retracts from his image, it only boosts it to show that even if he’s very busy, he is perfectly able to take care of himself, so him wanting Shiori in his life is because he really likes spending time with her, and I guess it was refreshing to see Ryunosuke not be that typical CEO type. The only thing I didn’t like was how the stalker thing was resolved, but I really liked how Ryunosuke very slowly but naturally warmed up to Shiori, they had such a realistic relationship, I couldn’t help but swoon the whole time over how cute and natural it was.

#pub encounter

[mrmallardsmobileposts]

My Star Wars Shipping Hot Takes

THERE WILL BE UNMARKED SPOILERS FOR THE ENTIRE SEQUEL TRILOGY IN THIS POST

TAG "#TRoS Spoilers" IF YOU WANT TO WIPE THIS POST FROM YOUR DASH COMPLETELY

THIS HAS BEEN MY SPOILER WARNING, YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED ABOUT STAR WARS SPOILERS

Finn/Rey should have been endgame, or at least brought up by Finn instead of the BS non-committal "I've got something to tell you" line they play with for the rest of the movie. Bring it into text and acknowledge it fully instead of using it for a few cheap gags and leaving it hanging.

They had great chemistry in TFA. They bonded really easily and got along really well, it seemed like Finn was chatting her up a little at times and by the end of the movie they're incredibly close. Finn puts his life on the line and gets fucked up by a lightsaber to defend her. John Boyega and Daisy Ridley played off each other really well, they had really good chemistry. I really ship it.

The only hitch, imo, is the total lack of screentime they have together in TLJ. Finn's plot just kinda went nowhere and he got a rehash of his "running away" arc in TFA, and I think the Rose Tico kiss was really lame and forced. While I can appreciate their eventual reunion, and within the scope of the movie it's not unreasonable for them to not meet again until the end, I really don't dig how much time they spend apart in TLJ from a shipping perspective and I don't think the Finn/Rose pairing is very good.

To address the elephant in the room, I'm not the most positive person about Rose Tico, but I'm chill with her and I think her character would have been fine with better material than she had in TLJ. Not trying to chud things up, here. The most extreme thing I have to say about Rose Tico, within the scope of this post I'm making, is that I didn't think the actors had that much chemistry to justify a romance, the kiss was goofy with the laser going off behind them, and while I don't disagree that Kelly Marie Tran got screwed over in TRoS, I'm ultimately glad that her and Finn are good buddies in that movie instead of partners. I'm not saying her reduced role is fine, just saying I'm glad that this pairing doesn't seem to be canon. I'm glad they're still close, though. Finn is definitely the heart of the group, pulling everyone together.

The thing about Finn/Rey in TRoS is that while the chemistry isn't there on the same level as TFA - partially due to the hatchet-job editing of the first half where people are barely able to vocalise a single coherent thought before the plot ushers them along to the next point - I felt like it still existed for a while. They teased it with the "I've got something I need to tell you" line from Finn, and then they never bring it up again. Like what the fuck, wrap up the plot point instead of dragging it out for the most painful humor of the movie and failing to resolve it.

This brings me into the Reylo portion of my post.

While I don't ship it, I refuse to hate Reylo. I've got a great write-up of my Reylo opinion on my main blog which explains why, if you search for "reylo". Basic point is that a lot of the initial backlash was predicated on assumptions that people were adamant would be proven true in the next movies, and those assumptions turned out to not be the case 4 years later in 2019, so I refuse to treat it like the pariah it was in 2015 for those reasons.

I'll admit that I really enjoyed the ending with Ben Solo. Adam Driver sells the difference between Ben Solo and Kylo Ren so well, and while I understand that he did a lot of bad shit and wiped out planets and committed space genocide and stuff - Darth Vader also committed space genocide and killed hundreds of people, and his body count continues to rise in supplemental materials. And yet he was redeemed by Luke, and was able to return as a force ghost despite the genocides and mass murders he committed as Darth Vader. There is a precedent for people redeeming themselves just before they die in the Star Wars universe, even when they do some really heinous shit. As such, I am not against this happening for Kylo Ren. Star Wars is just that kind of series, for better or worse.

My opinion of Reylo is that it's kind of like fanfic mode a lot of the time. It got really wacky in TLJ, and it got way more pronounced in TRoS. That's not necessarily a detriment, but it was what it was. I don't buy Kylo Ren and Rey as romantic interests necessarily, especially when I think their relationship is really, really odd and reminiscent of fanfiction cliches, but there's enough subtext for people to read into it and I don't really care if people like it or not.

If Reylo is the endgame ship, then that's fine. I don't necessarily like it, even as I acknowledge that problematic ships will always have their audience. A ship can be used as a force for good, as long as it isn't being used to actively promote abusive tendencies or like really gross shit.

Some ships are off limits, straight up. Reylo is dicey, but I don't think it's worse than a lot of villain shipping is - there's been room for edgy villain shipping before, and I think Reylo occupies that space now and has every right to. As long as people aren't encouraging people to engage in abusive practices through their storywriting, or pushing alt-right talking points and fucked up things like that through their writing, Reylo has enough wiggle room to be a perfectly ordinary pairing in the fanfiction community.

Saying that, though - here's why I prefer Finn/Rey.

He's a close, friendly and positive force in Rey's life, they shared the start of their journeys and they helped each other grow into the heroes they became. Poe spent most of TFA missing in action, and he only meets Rey at the end of the movie. Rey and Finn spend the bulk of their character moments together, and it's the character development from these interactions - spurred along by Han and Chewie, of course - that fuels their ascent into hero figures at the end of the movie.

Why don't I like Reylo more? Because the Kylo Ren stuff seemed like essential backstory stuff, whereas Finn and Rey's characters naturally got along like a house on fire. Kylo Ren also spends most of the time getting rain on his gloves through inter-force touching in a bunch of weird, forced, fanfic-tier scenes, whereas Finn and Rey hug and celebrate and bond through conversation, not trite, rigid backstory.

I can buy Rey kissing Ben Solo at the end of TRoS. I can buy her feeling love for Ben Solo, and finding it frustrating that she can't break through Kylo Ren to get to him. Fuck, in that ending scene where Kylo is explicitly Ben Solo again, Rey and Ben have actual, honest to god chemistry, and it's cute as fuck. But that moment took a lot of catching up to get to, and before her and Kylo showed any hint of affection together, Finn was her comrade in arms, someone who shared her victories and helped to further her growth, and vice versa.

Reylo has a pretty solid conclusion, I will certainly give it that. But I feel like the Reylo conclusion is steeped in that classic "I can redeem the bad guy through love" trope like the original Star Wars, except with a romantic angle this time. Ben's redemption didn't have to be with a kiss - it could still happen without the romance angle, but the romance is added in to distinguish it from the other Star Wars examples.

Ultimately, I think having Ben's redemption spurred by romantic love is broke, whereas Rey finding a buddy in Finn, having their ups and downs together, shielding each other from harm and becoming close through mutual shared experiences and proximity is woke.

What about Finn/Poe? Ship it if you want, it's all good. I understand why this ship was initially so popular, and while I don't ship it, I'm not the shipping police and I get the premise behind it. Poe/CrimeGirl? This was shoehorned tf in, but if you think it's neato, it's neato. Poe/Rey? I think they would make a terrible couple, but whatever. Poe/Finn/Rey? Everyone wins. Add Kylo Ren anywhere into the mix and you can have yourself a party, depending on your stance on the character. Make any of the characters gay, bi, pan, ace - literally whatever, outside of a few significant parameters just about every ship is valid. I'm not a hard-ass, shipping is fun and outside of some really bad shit I'm generally down for people having a good time. I just like Finn/Rey the most.

Also, Maz Kanata is really neat and I hope she gets more screen time. If her lifespan makes it squicky to ship her with the younger characters, that's your business and I understand and respect that, but frankly I would write a romance story about Maz Kanata falling in love in a heartbeat - I just don't know who. I've written Doctor Who fanfic where a 2000 year old alien woman dates a 21 year old policewoman from Sheffield, so as long as the right boundaries are respected, I think a Maz Kanata story could be pretty fun and non-problematic like with a Doctor Who story.

Anyway that's my Hot Takes post

byeeeeee

#tros spoilers #spoilers #star wars spoilers #star wars #reylo

[jennadorn]

Old Navy Denim

I’m 24 years old and I’ve just slept with a woman for the first time — and though it was by no means the sex of my dreams, so much so that I nauseously declined the morning after sex, I think about it regularly with fondness and a desperate sense of nostalgia. Because in my mind, it officially confirmed my physical and romantic attraction to my own gender. Or anyone with a vagina for that matter.

If I had to guess when my first “gay” thought occurred — (as if all thoughts aren’t inherently gay to some degree) it was likely during my childhood friendship with my next door neighbor, Jolie. During the five years that I lived across the street from Jolie, we were glued at the hip. Every day after elementary school, we’d run through the neighborhood together on a sour candy-induced high, pushing one another down the Doral Avenue hill on skateboards, ding-dong ditching the old prunes on our street. We’d celebrate Pesach and Hanukkah together; we’d swim in her pool until the warm hours of each summer day cooled into bittersweet evenings; we’d pretend to be grownups with British accents and lollipop stem cigarettes — we’d play house together (which I realize now is a fucked up game centered around internalized domesticity and the American idealization of the nuclear family, but that’s beside the point). During our bourgeois family shenanigans, I’d insist that we were married (fuck you patriarchy). And as innocent as this sounds — there was a feeling brewing within me that I couldn’t articulate then — but that I can finally characterize as a pure, but tragic crush.

As we grew older, Jolie, with her striking green eyes, flushed olive skin, and golden locks, blossomed and classically found popularity every direction she turned. Boys ogled at her, girls fought over their ranking friendship with her. And I, in my baggy, torn denim from the boys’ department of Old Navy, absolutely crushing it (not) with an endearing unibrow, and overcome with social anxiety, slowly faded into her peripherals, eventually becoming the shy, weird girl dressed in boys’ clothing — Gameboy Color or Judy Blume book always in hand — who she avoided eye contact with at all times.

This continued until high school, when I grew into my body, traded in my swim trunks for shorts that hardly covered my coochie, my books and journals for friends whom I had nothing in common with other than raging hormones and body image issues, and invitations to parties.

I tried to differentiate my feelings for boys and for girls: I liked boys, whereas I just experienced a strange combination of admiration and deep envy for some of the girls I hung out around. I hopelessly wanted to be them, maybe, not be with them. It was the sole explanation that I could rationalize. 

And sometimes when I’d look longingly at women holding hands and kissing in public, I’d force myself not to look. But then I couldn’t look away. And sometimes I’d just change my dating app preferences to women because I was only curious. If I were gay, I would have already come out, right? It would have been obvious to me. I would have had a relationship with a woman… I would have already slept with one. If I told anyone that I liked women now, I’d just look like a fraud. And maybe I was. And what if my friends became weird around me when I told them? So I buried. I buried myself inside my own discomfort and denied this mystifying void expanding faster than my own universe.

It wasn’t until I found some semblance of queer community with new roommates post-college, who I could gush about crushes to, who I could open up about my experiences to…and lack thereof, that I could acknowledge my sexuality. I was not doubted by them like I’d feared. My roommates were the only ones who knew initially, and with enough validation, I found the courage to go on dates with women.

Enter: Cameron

A baby-faced butch writer I met on Hinge. She mirrored me in passions and personality, mostly — until she quickly revealed a superiority complex bigger than her own head. She evoked in me waves of embarrassment and shame that I hadn’t even known existed, only within hours of meeting. It had been my fourth date with a woman.

We quickly descended into heated conversations about film and politics, our families, our dreams. Like the gays we were, we unpacked our birth charts — both of us scorpios — which could only explain the ensuing events. Our chemistry was so palpable that I had to physically placate the butterflies in my stomach with my hand. We flirted, teased one another about potentially making out later that night, and before leaving the bar, exchanged coming out stories (which was initiated by her because mine was clearly still TBD). She shamed me for not telling my parents, for not having a “story”. She didn’t understand my fear as a bisexual/queer person that others would think I was experiencing “just a phase”. She made me feel like an imposter for not having already coming out to everyone. Lastly, she was incredulous that I was interested in men. She’d responded with such inflated disbelief that it rendered me paralyzed and defenseless. And she made sure that I was aware of these facts about myself every succeeding hour.

Several spellbinding drinks deep, we wandered back to my apartment. We pushed each others’ buttons so precisely that it felt like we’d known each other for years. It wasn’t until I later re-assessed her digs, that I realized every cutting word seemed to refract a cruel, blinding shard of truth. She wasn’t teasing, but criticizing me. I’d brushed it off in the moment, much like one does with rose-saturated glasses. And then the shock of a verbal attack is finally processed, let alone absorbed, when you’re wide awake in bed that night, tossing and turning over the painful remarks etched into your memory. And you can only think of what you’d have said, reliving the moment over and over again, grasping for the missed, gratifying opportunity at calling someone out on the shit they gift you, adorned in a glittery bow and rainbow-themed wrapping paper.

Sprawled along my couch, I made the first move after she insisted that the ball was in my court. I either made the move or the night was over. So after enough nerve-numbing alcohol, I took her in my hands and brushed her lips. And we kissed some more. And some more. And suddenly she’s on top of me. We entreated to my room as the blanket of steam around us thickened. Under my satiny covers, I told her that I was unsure if I wanted to have sex. I prefer not to on the first date, or until I feel comfortable with someone inside of me. She willfully dismissed my explanation. She said that she might understand if it was a man I was in bed with, but this wasn’t the same. And it was clear I was comfortable with her. And wasn’t I having a good time? Why shouldn’t we have sex? I froze in shock. To placate her, I said that I’d let her know when I wanted to stop.

So we had sex. I was simultaneously enthralled…swooning…exhilarated that I was literally pussy deep in the reality that I’d denied for so long, and also heartbroken that it ensued over a crushing pressure that I’d experienced endlessly from men, and never expected to confront from another woman.

We fell asleep baby cheek to baby cheek and she spooned me all night. It was all so newly wonderful that I was nearly ready to look over each problematic chapter of our evening together. So when she was offended upon my asking her to leave the next day, and when she gaslit me after our second date which she assumed was ending with sex, I reluctantly cut all the ties with which she’d suffocated me (in a non-horny way). They say you never forget your first love, but hell hath no fury on your first lesbian romance.

#prose #gay love #queer

[the-mira-life-project-mtf]

Please Don’t Misgender Me (My MtF~HRT Journey)

Please Do Not Misgender Me Because I Am A Trans-Woman...I may be transgender, converting to female slowly over the years...but it does not mean that I am romantic for men or interested...

I suffer from Gender Dysphoria (a real medical condition) which makes life difficult socially and physically; so I subjugate my body to metamorphosis to make my life livable. However, one careless word can create emotional harm that can lead to physical harm and suicide. 

Please show me the proper respect and use my preferred pronouns. I will always respect your preferred gender; and if you are uncertain, just ask!

So...if I don’t have a uterus...I can’t be a woman...

Well, that is just rude not only to trans-women like myself, but to women in general...

Many claim: You don’t have breasts, uterus, ovaries or vagina...so you can’t be woman...that is a dangerous assumption! I know a few women who had cancer of the uterus and ovaries and they had them removed: Are they any lesser female now?

Technically, the argument should be: You Don’t Need To Have A Uterus To Be A Woman; But You Do Need A Uterus To Be A Female. Again, this is a dangerous assumption as one organ does not make you male or female...it is a collection of organs and biology.

Now...lets talk about the topic that I wish to address: Being transgender, and a trans-woman does not mean that I am gay. I still consider myself heterosexual (sexually)...

Because I am heterosexual trans-woman, I don’t date men or gay men as I am sexually attracted to women.

Now, this is where it gets odd; if I am a cis-male (transgender) then I’m a hetrosexual trans-woman attracted to women. But, according to the LGBTQ spectrum and my soul: I was once cis-male (biologically), but with hormones and metamorphosis, I have become a pseudo-female (transgender) in a hetrosexual relationship with another female, making me a lesbian trans-woman.

My adoptive brother and girlfriend are all on the LGBT spectrum; but not a single one of us are the same, sexually. My brother is gay and dates a young man whom he loves. Whereas, my girlfriend is bisexual and will date any sex that loves her. I am transgender; this does not mean that I am influenced by my sexual desire, I am trying to switch my gender to match my soul.

I might have been born male; but my body is feminine, my chemistry biologically female (hormone levels) and my soul anima-dominate. Since I was born male, most think I should be attracted to male...but I am not male...I am female.

But...with the introduction of estrogen into my blood, my testosterone at female levels and almost two years on hormones; I believe the estrogen is changing my brain’s chemistry, making me bisexual like my girlfriend as I find myself sexually attracted to women and finding men ‘interesting’.

From what I’ve learned from my brother, being gay usually means that they are not sexually stimulated by women because of either denial, rejection or abuse. I think gay men would find a relationship with a trans-woman very beneficial as it would decrease social stigmatism while out in public, while allowing the gay male to date a cis-male, but get to experience equally feminine.

Being a transgender-woman doesn’t make me any less human as any cis-woman or cis-man...yet, a small portion of society continues to demonize us trans, making us uncomfortable with going out into the public’s eyes.

One thing I can offer to those transitioning; don’t feel bad if you are having a difficult time converting: there is no manual or book on transitioning and what to expect. Many months you’ll face your transition alone and feel hopeless; please don’t give in or give up. One thing we trans all know about transitioning is being there for one another.

Even with my families uneasiness, being outcast by half of my relatives. Losing 60% of my friends. Not understanding what is happening to my body. Struggling to find a doctor and work that respects the LGBTQA...remember, it will only get easier the further down the road to go.

Live your life as your spirit demands...no one can live it for you. I found that my greatest obstacle was fearing what people will think; but I’ve learned that no family, no friends, no soul on earth will understand or live my life. I must do what makes my soul happy, I must be true to myself and the woman I was once and becoming once more.

________________________________________________________________

Source Imagery: https://www.huffpost.com/entry/6-things-this-trans-woman-wants-you-to-know_n_56377f29e4b063179912f2ea

Here are six things Carrera wants everyone to know about trans women:  

Do not misgender. To misgender someone means to ‘refer to someone using a word, especially a pronoun or form of address, that does not reflect the gender they identify with.’

She doesn’t date gay men. Gay guys are attracted to...guys. ‘I’m not a man so I consider myself not only transgender, but I consider myself heterosexual.’

You don’t need to have a uterus to be a woman. ‘For someone to tell me that because I don’t menstruate or don’t have a uterus I’m not considered a woman I feel like that’s rude not only to trans women but also to women in general.’

Trans women are figuring it out as they go along. ‘I would love for the female population to be more welcoming to us because we need a little bit more help along the way,’ she says. Living as their authentic selves also means leaving male privilege behind, which can be a difficult experience for many trans women.

Any person would be lucky to have sex with a trans woman. Sex is sex is sex. Let’s not make a big deal of it.

Respect the privacy of trans people. ‘When it comes to being in public spaces or where you have to show your I.D. like at the airport or at a night club it can get a little uncomfortable for a transgender woman who hasn’t gone through the process of changing her name and her gender marker because it is a process for us,’ Carrera says.

Well said, Carrera.

#transgender #transformation #trans #male to female #maletofemale #mtf #MtF trans #mtf women #mtf hrt #mtf pride #hormone #hormone replacement therapy #dysphoria #Gender Dysphoria #body dysphoria #lgbtq community #LGBTQA #lgbt #lgbtq #feminism #feminine #new life #my life

[thisdiscontentedwinter]

Stella and the Wolf - Chapter 22

You can read it on AO3 or find the Tumblr Chapter Index here. 

Stiles might not have much experience at being the center of attention at school, but Jackson and Lydia certainly do. They’re waiting in the parking lot, leaning against Jackson’s silver Porsche—if it was scratched on Friday night by Peter’s journey through the back roads of the Preserve, the damage has already been buffed and polished out—looking ridiculously attractive. Both of them.

“Hurry up, Stilinski,” Jackson says when Stiles pulls in nearby.

Jesus. What a dick. Except Stiles gets the feeling that it’s all pretty much an act now—it’s a fucking good act, he’ll give Jackson that. He’s totally committed to the role, for sure—so he slings his backpack over his shoulder and picks up his pace as he reaches them.

They both look like they’ve stepped off the front page of a glossy fashion magazine, whereas Stiles is pretty sure he has peanut butter on his shirt.

But they make room in between them like he belongs there, and stride toward the school like they expect there are cameras watching.

Are there classes or something? On how to be this attractive and intimidating? Weekly sessions in a secret undisclosed location, with a teaching staff made up of supermodels and disaffected beautiful people? Because Beacon Hills seems to have a lot of that going around, but Stiles never got sent the prospectus.

The crowds part for Jackson and Lydia like they’re celebrities. It’s weird. Everyone is looking and whispering, probably wondering if Stiles’s kidnapping makes him suddenly cool enough to be elevated into Lydia and Jackson’s social sphere, but nobody dares approach. It’s like Lydia and Jackson project a force field that the regular kids can’t penetrate. And Stiles would know. He was on the other side of it as recently as Friday.

They escort Stiles to his locker, and then to the door of his homeroom.

“You’re eating lunch with us today,” Jackson tells him with a haughty expression.

Stiles sees right past it.

“Okay,” he says. “And Jackson?”

Jackson cocks an eyebrow at him.

Lydia takes her compact out of her purse and inspects her perfectly applied lipstick.

“What you guys did the other night, both of you, was just…” He swallows. “But you got Stella away from her, Jackson, and like, I owe you. I owe you everything.”

Jackson flashes him a cocky smirk. “Whatever.”

Stiles rolls his eyes.  

Jackson lowers his voice. “Is she okay?”

Because heaven forbid anyone overhear him and realize he has a heart.

Lydia snaps her compact closed and slips it back inside her purse.

“Fuck you,” Stiles says warmly. “You pretend to be this total douche, I see through you now, you asshole.” He looks at Lydia. “I used to wonder what you saw in him, but I get it now. I get it.”

“Are you saying he’s your type?” she asks.

Jackson snorts. “I’m everyone’s type.”

He’s such an asshole.

Stiles loves him.

***

In Chemistry, Harris is still a total dick to Stiles, so some things never change.

In English, Allison looks totally shell-shocked and when she tries to look for a pen in her bag, she spills the contents all over the floor and Scott scrambles to help her pick them up.

Stiles wonders if she knows.

***

“She doesn’t know,” Lydia says at lunch, stabbing her salad delicately with a fork. “I talked to her yesterday. She’s buying the whole story about her aunt being a domestic terrorist.” She slips a piece of lettuce into her mouth and chews for a moment. “Scott should really tell her.”

Stiles laughs weakly. “Scott? Why would—”

“Don’t play dumb, Stilinski.” Jackson rolls his eyes. “Derek told us everything when we were burying his uncle.”

Right. Grave digging duty. It probably brings people together and stuff. Nothing like a bond formed over a shallow grave.

“Also, nobody gets that suddenly good at lacrosse,” Jackson mutters, like he’s still personally affronted by that most of all. “Not when they were so freaking lame to start with.”

They’re sitting alone at the popular table. Scott keeps casting Stiles worried looks from where he’s sitting with Allison, but as far as Stiles is concerned he has werewolf shit to discuss with Jackson and Lydia, and if Allison’s not in the loop then it’s not their place to bring her in. That’s on Scott. Also, her crazy hunter aunt tried to kill him and his family on Friday night, and he’s still processing that. He really doesn’t have the capacity to deal with her inevitable shock at any werewolf reveal in addition to that.

“Anyway, she doesn’t know,” Lydia says. “And Mr. Argent says that his father is coming to town for Kate’s funeral, and he’s apparently just as crazy as Kate was, which is the reason Allison’s parents don’t want her to know anything about hunters, and werewolves, or anything that could drastically lower her life expectancy.”

Wow. Apparently while Stiles was reading Batman and watching TV over the weekend, Lydia was on a fact-finding mission at the Argents’ house. Also, that explains Dad’s phone call from Chris Argent last night.

Lydia catches his look and shrugs. “You’re not the only one who likes to get the complete picture.”

Jackson helps himself to one of Stiles’s tator tots. “How’s Derek?”

“I don’t know,” Stiles says. “I mean, he just lost his last family member. How do you think?”

Jackson and Lydia exchange a look.

“What?” Stiles asks. “What?”

“It’s nothing,” Lydia says airily. “So is Derek staying with you?”

“Yeah.” Stiles feels like he’s been sidelined somehow.

“Good.” Lydia clasps her hands together. “We’ll come and visit him after school.”

“Wait, what?” A part of Stiles’s brain snags on the idea of Lydia Martin in his house, and he shakes his head to untangle himself. “Why?”

“Because Gerard Argent, Allison’s grandfather, is very likely going to have Derek in his sights when he comes to town,” Lydia says, explaining it like he’s slow. “And an Alpha needs betas to be strong. At least two, preferably more.”

Stiles squints at her. “How do you know all this in two days?”

Jackson snorts. “Guess you’re not the smartest person in the room for once, Stilinski. Now you know how the rest of us feel all the time.”

Lydia flashes Jackson a warm smile, and turns back to Stiles. “I told you, I did my research.”

“So what?” Stiles asks. “You’re still chasing the bite, Jackson?”

Jackson reaches for an apple and takes a bite. “So what if I am?”

“Even after the other night? You saw what hunters do.”

“This time I’m not chasing it,” Jackson says. “But I’m volunteering. An Alpha needs a pack.”

Stiles fights down the sudden rush of jealousy that wants to tell Jackson that the Stilinskis make a fine pack, thanks very much. Because it’s not exactly true, is it? Derek has the Stilinskis, and they could be a family for him—last night Derek folded laundry and sorted Dad’s socks, and it doesn’t get more family than that—but maybe Jackson’s right. Because Derek is an Alpha now. Maybe an Alpha needs more than a family. Stiles isn’t a werewolf. He can’t know the difference between family and pack, but he should know better than to assume there is none. Maybe an Alpha does need a pack, and there must be times where the meanings of the words overlap—he thinks of Derek’s story about Peter kidnapping the Hale kids for a Disneyland trip—but it’s possible they’re not an exact synonym.

And maybe Jackson isn’t being selfish. Maybe he’s not looking at what the bite can give him, but at what he can give Derek instead.

Stiles remembers in third grade when Jackson had a meltdown in class over one of those dumb family tree projects, and that’s how everyone found out he was adopted. Maybe, for Jackson, family was never quite what he needed to be. Maybe he thinks pack will give him something that he still feels he’s missing.

“Okay,” he says. “I mean, there’s no harm in offering, is there? If you know the risks.”

“I do.” Jackson crunches down on his apple.

Stiles glances at Lydia. “You said betas? Are you volunteering as well?”

Lydia huffs. “God, no. Trust me, that’s not even an option.”

“Because Scott’s no fan of Derek’s,” Stiles says. “Like, at all.”

“We know,” Jackson says, and rolls his eyes. “McCall is a dick.”

Stiles bristles out of habit. “Takes one to know one.”

Lydia elbows Jackson before he can retaliate. “We’re working on it, Stiles.”

Working on it? What does that even mean? Does she have an alphabetized list of potential beta candidates lined up or something? Will they have to submit résumés? Will there be interviews?

He’s just about to open his mouth to ask when he becomes aware of someone approaching in his periphery. He turns his head to see Allison standing by the table, her eyes red-rimmed and her hands clenched at her sides.

“Stiles?” she asks in a fragile voice.

“Oh. Um, hey, Allison.”

He’s aware that the entire cafeteria has stopped to watch this exchange, and wonders if they’re expecting fireworks.

Allison draws in an audibly shaky breath. “I just wanted to say that I’m really sorry for what happened to you, and your father and Stella. And I understand if you don’t ever want to talk to me again, but—”

“Oh, hey!” Stiles pushes his chair back so quickly that he almost overbalances, and leaps to his feet. “No, Allison. I mean, she was your aunt, but you didn’t know. I’m not going to hold it against you just because she was, well, crazy pants.”

Allison’s brow creases.

Okay, so that wasn’t the best way to phrase things. Stiles tries to regroup. “Anyway, if I was going to judge you on your relatives, okay your aunt tried to kill us, but your dad came through, so that totally evens things out, right? Math for the win!”

Lydia groans, and Jackson winces, but Allison only tilts her head and stares at Stiles blankly for a moment.

“Oh god,” Stiles says. “I can’t believe I said that.”

Allison blinks, and tears brim in her eyes, but at the same time her mouth twitches and a small, strangled noise escapes her. It might even be a laugh? “So we’re good, you and me?”

“Totally,” Stiles promises.

She shows him a tentative smile. “Thank you, Stiles.”

And then she darts forward and hugs him quickly before turning away and going back to sit with Scott.

No fireworks in the cafeteria today.

Stiles sits back down, shooting an accusatory look at Jackson when he sees his diminished amount of tater tots.

Jackson smirks. “Hey, I’m carb loading for lacrosse. What’s your excuse?”

“My excuse is I paid for those!”

Jackson shrugs.

“Asshole,” Stiles mutters.

Jackson’s smirk grows.

Lydia rolls her eyes, but she at least shoves her salad in Stiles’s direction so he doesn’t starve to death.

#sterek #Stella and the Wolf #my fics #discontentedwinter

[joie-university-rp]

Dear, RANA MORETTI,

It is with great pleasure we invite you admission to Joie University! Welcome to the Thunderclap family!

–

Congratulations, LIV! Please be sure to check the New Members’ Checklist and send in your character’s account within 24 hours from now. We cannot wait to see all that you will bring to this roleplay! We love you already!

OOC INFORMATION:

Name/Alias; preferred pronouns: Liv She/Her

Age, Timezone: 20 BST

Activity, short explanation: Always

Ships: Rana/Chemistry

Anti-Ships: Rana/No Chemistry

Triggers: RFP

Preferred photo for Character’s ID (please give a link): Here!

Anything else: -

IC INFORMATION:

Full Name (First, Middle, Last): Rana Anais Moretti

FC: Camila Mendes

Age/Year at University (Freshman [1st Year], Sophomore, Junior, Senior, or Graduate Student): Freshman

Birth date: March 24, 2001

Hometown (please be sure to check the hometowns listed for characters your muse is related to!): Redwood Shores, California

Gender/Pronouns: Female She/Her

Sexuality: Bisexual

Major(s): Creative Writing

Minor(s) [optional]: Music & Dance

Housing request: Beiste Dormitory 126

Extracurriculars: Glee Club, Swim Team, Cheer Squad

Greek Life Affiliation: [Undecided]

CHARACTER PROFILE:

TW: Violence

Rana as put up for adoption before birth by her biological mother, Saira Oliveira-Habeeb as she was only sixteen at the time and it was not possible for her to care for a baby. The Oliveira-Habeeb Family lived only a couple of houses away from the Moretti Family and due to their longing for another child after being unsuccessful to fall pregnant after the birth of their eldest son, Franco.

After completing pre-placement training and an adoption home study, the Moretti family were successfully offered placement for adoption; five months later, Rana was legally adopted just a few hours after being born. Her adopted parents have always made sure she was aware of her being adopted, as well as having always being offered the opportunity to contact her birth family.

Although she is the youngest, Rana is incredibly protective of her older brother, Franco. While she may be short and mostly introverted from the rest of the world, she is also more than capable of defending herself and her loved ones- for example, she once got suspended in her Freshman Year of High School after hearing someone refer to Franco as ‘an idiot’, resulting in Rana lashing out and punching the student in the face.

STUDENT CENSUS SURVEY:

What made you want to attend Joie University? “If it’s good enough for Franco and my parents approval, why would I even consider going anywhere else?”

What are at least 3 positive or neutral and at least 3 negative traits that you believe you possess? “Positive; I’m determined, protective and honest. Whereas negative; I’m introverted, stubborn and sensitive.”

Which of your traits do you value most? “I value my honesty the most.”

How can that trait benefit the University (or its student body) as a whole? “University is the big leagues, there’s no time for worrying about hurting someone’s feelings; you think something is wrong, it’s on you to bring it to light. I don’t appreciate twinkle-toes who stand in the background of a crisis and keep saying they saw it coming. Really, bitch? If you saw it coming, why didn’t you do shit to prevent it?”

What do you hope to gain from your experience at JU? “Maybe to become more of a team player, to converse more with people instead of sitting in the back of the room thinking what could’ve been if I had actually gone up to speak to that person.”

What is a quote or song lyric that describes you? “I don’t know quite what to say, to the girl in the mirror.”

#accepted

[margridarnauds]

001 olympe/solene please!!! (also i know i haven't answered in 8 years but please bear with me, i haven't forgotten i'm just very late)

Thank you! (Also it’s fine; I was just a little worried I’d finally scared you away!) The following thoughts might be slightly rambling, given my family’s doing our daily rewatch of Toho!1789 and Maniaque just came on, thus short circuiting my brain. 

when I started shipping it if I did: I seem to recall a conversation between you and @couldntgiveafox some ages ago where you were discussing alternative 1789s, and I believe I stumbled across it in my fall to 1789 Hell. I don’t think I really started actively SHIPPING it until I was writing Pour la Peine and the (still a WIP) Modern AU where they go to Disneyworld, since it showed off more how they would WORK as a couple. (Yes, really. In my defense, there’s something about Solène and Olympe working together to get Artois stranded on “It’s a Small World” that warms the cockles of my shipping heart.)

my thoughts: I think they have a lot of potential as a ship; I would REALLY love to have seen more of them in canon because I think that they’d have had a lot more potential than our canon ship. (Not that that’s SAYING much, but…) The two of them have two very different ways of dealing with things that really make them complement each other well. Like, Solène has a much more direct way of doing things; she probably had to shut down most of Ronan’s fights with the other kids in their village when they were younger, whereas Olympe…can handle herself, obviously, but she tends to prefer sidestepping it if she can and tends to prefer using the gun only as an absolute last resort. And Solène and Olympe both…fill in the gaps, with each other? Like, Olympe’s a woman who everyone sees as this simple little governess who can be walked over but has a spine of steel beneath those stays, whereas Solène is a woman who presents herself as being basically untouchable and unbreakable, but she has a lot of vulnerability beneath the surface. 

What makes me happy about them: Solène has this blunt, rough edge that really works well against almost everyone, but the second that Olympe enters the room? She melts. Even if she’s terrified of what exactly that means and trusting someone again. She’s basically the embodiment of “I’ve only had Olympe for a day and a half, but if anything happened to her, I’d kill everyone in this room and then myself.” And Peyrol. Even if he’s not in the room and had nothing to do with it, she’d still kill Peyrol for good measure. And for Olympe, she has someone who’s genuinely in love with HER and would be willing to bend over backwards for her. (It’s not that I dislike Antoinette or that I’m even particularly criticizing her, but I do think that she can be insensitive when it comes to Olympe’s crush right until the very end when she lets her go and that sometimes, she takes advantage of Olympe’s feelings without realizing it, causing Olympe to get into trouble. See: Je Suis un Dieu.) Like, Lazare and Solène would never ADMIT it, because fundamentally they have way too much between them, but they have more in common there than they’d ever admit. 

Finally: BLESS the Toho for giving me, like, five seconds of interaction between them. It might not have been much, but THEY TOUCHED HANDS. While watching Solène’s brother being brutally shot by his boyfriend, but hey, it’s not the WORST first date idea. And Solène’s CLINGING onto this girl she’s just met in that scene, after rushing herself in front of Peyrol’s line of fire to do it. 

What makes me sad about them: Obviously, the lack of interaction between them, even though, on the positive side, it means the show can’t ruin it for me. Solène is hard as a character to write, because all three Solènes are written so very differently from one another that it’s hard to get a grip on her, especially since it’s obvious that the French really didn’t…CARE about her, as a character, and that also means that trying to get their dynamic can be hard. Like, I still feel after all this time that I don’t have them down as well as I have L/R, which is something that I’m always trying to rectify. 

Also, from an in-universe perspective: I think…Solène is very like her brother, in the sense that she doesn’t see HERSELF as inherently inferior or incapable of love (the one thing no one has EVER accused the Mazurier Siblings of is a lack of confidence), but that so much has happened to her that she kind of takes it for granted that this isn’t going to end well. Our girl’s canonically lost her brother and father, she’s PROBABLY lost her mother (I mean, unless she’s just…living as a hermit somewhere since Ronan and Soléne ran away or left Papa Mazurier to become a famous adventuress, I think it’s a safe assumption), and it’s safe to assume she’s lost at least 2-3 siblings, if not more, and…as much as I’m against the idea of the Tragic Sex Worker, she’s also probably seen Things in her time on the streets. If nothing else, then sex work was very much a transitory job for many women, who would take it up in off seasons in-between other jobs (or marriage, for some women), so there are probably plenty of women who she knew and tried to get attached to who just…moved on. 

And I think that Marie Antoinette’s ghost is always kind of going to be there, in the background, even as Olympe moves on from the full force of her old feelings. And Olympe has her own issues when it comes to loss, not just with Ronan (who was a friend if nothing else) and her mother (if we’re going with the musical-canon where Charlotte du Puget’s been dead for awhile), but also with probably seeing Louis-Joseph die in front of her. 

things done in fanfic that annoys me: WHAT FANFIC? There’s so little of it available that it’s kind of impossible for me to find ANYTHING to really annoy me. The thing that annoys me when I’M writing them is that there’s this…odd tendency, with femslash, for things to be sanitized and clean and saccharine, as opposed to M/M and F/M ships. And, on one hand, I DESPISE that mentality, but on the other hand, I find that I’ve internalized some of that, even though realistically S/O have…so much that they could bicker over. If they wanted to. So I try to keep at least a realistic level of conflict in their relationship, without reaching R/O or even R/L levels. 

things I look for in fanfic: Existing is always a lovely thing. 

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: Olympe/MA is always going to be a tragic crush for me; I’m not sure if it’d have worked in the long run as an actual RELATIONSHIP, but I’d be perfectly comfortable with Olympe being happy. Or accepting Artois’ offer, biding her time in London while slowly poisoning him so that she can retire in an obscene amount of wealth when the new king of France “tragically” dies only a few months into his new reign. 

Even though I’m pretty attached to Olympe being a lesbian and Lazare being gay and/or ace, I’m also not OPPOSED to them marrying each other as a matter of convenience post-canon, though…obviously. After the Takarazuka and Toho productions, there are going to be…issues with that one. (Lazare is incapable of being with someone when he hasn’t at least tried to kill their father.) Matthieu Carnot and Camille Lou in the original cast had HELLA chemistry with one another, and I’m not entirely willing to toss it all away.     

And for Solène…I’m not sure I’d go with ANYONE in the main cast. My main headcanon re: Solène and sexuality is that she’s bi, but the whole “Betrayal by her idiot of a brother” thing has really put her off the idea of being romantically involved with dudes for an extended period of time. Sexually? Sure, for the money involved. It’s her JOB, but she’s not going to go for anything that requires trust. Lucile is the obvious alternative, but I’m not sure how Lucile’s upper middle class upbringing would work with Solène and her profession, and the entire business with the engagement +…Lucile’s ultimate fate would work. (Also Lucile’s part in The Scene in the Toho version…it hasn’t put me off her as a CHARACTER, I still love her very much, but…it’s made me…less keen on her with Solène.) I also crackship her with Marie Antoinette. Marie Antoinette gets all the ladies in the main cast. 

My happily ever after for them: In the canon verse? They leave Paris, either getting out of the country or quietly running into the country, where they can live in peace without the Reign of Terror getting them. They establish a domestic life together, where both of them learn to trust again, even as Solène keeps her own funds Just in Case, because some things are a little harder to move past than others. Lt. du Puget knows, but he’s been too traumatized by his own experiences with the Bastille, as well as too grateful to the Mazuriers for all they’ve done to raise a fuss, and he becomes like a second father to Solène, with Françoise being a sister and partner in crime to her. Solène doesn’t lose track of her friends in Paris and visits them from time to time, even as she gets used to middle class life, and she never entirely loses her fire. They both die of old age, many, many years after the Revolution (because, as we all know, Olympe does not die at the end, and there has never been a time where she died at the end; it is her destiny to outlive the rest of the cast with her girlfriend.) And then, in the afterlife, Solène gets at least one slap in on her brother before they’re one big, happy family again. Because he does deserve it, tbh. 

Out of canon, I would honestly love to see a world where Solène/Olympe and Lazare/Ronan could have co-existed with each other as a family, albeit an insanely unorthodox one. I could see Olympe and Lazare having a marriage of convenience, with both of them having their own sections of the house that are just theirs, and with sex not even being a consideration. (Solène takes it more as a matter of course and the best possible option, even if she doesn’t LIKE Lazare; Ronan runs off and spends, like, a week crying somewhere before they can get him calmed down enough to explain.) Like, their wedding night is spent playing cards in bed until they can sneak out to their separate rooms, and at some point Ronan’s in-between them, drooling on Lazare’s shoulder while Solène glares daggers because if he hurts her girlfriend or her brother, she will not HESITATE to destroy him. Everyone knows that they’re gay AF and that a former under-governess to the royal family is sleeping with a former sex worker, mainly because Artois never shuts up about it (because if he can’t have Lazare under his thumb and he can’t murder the hypotenuse, he’s at least going to do his best to make his life miserable), but, does it matter? No. What are they going to do, not invite Lazare or Olympe to one of their salons? The horror, the horror. One year, for her New Year’s present, Ronan gives Solène a pair of earplugs so she doesn’t have to hear some of the ungodly sounds that come from his and Lazare’s side of the house. Everyone’s happy. 

who is the big spoon/little spoon: See, my GUT instinct is Solène for big spoon, since it gives her a place of security without her feeling pinned in, but also I love the thought of Olympe sometimes taking over, nuzzling into Solène’s neck and having Solène wake up and being like “Holy shit, this is real” even years later. 

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: Taking walks together, reading. I like to think that Olympe helps Solène learn how to read (which is one of the areas where I feel like they differ from R/L. Even though I think Lazare would read out loud to Ronan, I’m not sure he’d go through the trouble of TEACHING him, especially since that’s…giving Ronan some serious power as far as being able to page through any of Lazare’s papers.) Sometimes, Solène just prefers to hear Olympe read out loud, with her absently putting her hand on Olympe’s arm as time goes on and she relaxes, since Olympe has a very bright, expressive voice that suited her well when she was an undergoverness, and even if she doesn’t mean to, she finds herself taking on different voices for different characters, which makes for an entertaining reading experience,. The two of them also help each other with their daily toilette, getting each other’s hair and clothes prepared. 

This? Is an Olympe innovation. 

And this? Is a Solène. She Tries. And Olympe loves her for it. 

#1789 les amants de la bastille #olympe du puget #solène mazurier #solympe #I guess that's my new tag for them #berncat