until i recently read posts on here about how there is an inherent queerness to the doctor and rose's relationship in how it's unspoken and filled with yearning that i'd never really considered that element, despite knowing for ages that RTD is gay but. man. it's just reframed a lot of the series for me, like the idea that you have this lonely man who's just watched his people die and is self-destructive and misanthropic and traumatised and he can love again and he wants to but it has so many risks.
but especially S3 and how it adds even more weight to the doctor's grieving widower status. how he tells martha that he and rose were together but martha refers to rose as a friend to tallulah; the fact that he can only say they were together once she is gone; how the only other person that both can feel how he feels but also understands the depth of his feelings is jack, a queer man himself. and I've been thinking to myself lately oh, it's ok, the doctor and rose probably accidentally got married on at least one planet or something but also the point is that there was no official title that could convey to people the extent that they meant to each other, that the doctor can really only tell donna that rose was his friend even though it is so wholly inadequate and she comes to see that by the end of the episode (and martha too of course). how people who saw the doctor and rose together assumed they were a couple, like on krop tor, but once there's no more physical evidence of the relationship it becomes more vague (and simultaneously clearer).
anyway something about how christopher eccleston said he based his portrayal of nine on RTD and something about RTD saying that his husband is "in every good man i write now" and how the doctor and ruby seeing each other in the club mimics his first meeting with his husband aka the one moment he would use a time machine to go back to hmmm
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“Have you ever been in love?”
The question seems to take Evan by surprise. “What?”
Barty repeats the question, shifting up into a sitting position. His hands dig into the ground, still damp from last night’s rain. “Have you ever been in love?”
There’s a beat of silence. Then, looking down at his feet, Evan quietly answers, “Yes.”
Suddenly, Barty is mad at himself for asking. He can’t even say why he asked in the first place; he simply had the thought, and being the impulsive person he is, he asked without thinking. Now he wishes he hadn’t, if only to have avoided this odd burning in his chest caused by Evan’s answer. And really, he should drop the topic, based on downcast tint to Evan’s response, but he can’t seem to let it go. So instead, he presses the issue.
“When?” he asks, looking intently at Evan.
At that, Evan looks to his left, purposely avoiding eye contact with Barty. He stubs out his cigarette on the grass next to him, a thin curl of smoke rising up from it as he does so. “A long, long time ago.” His voice is dark with something Barty can’t name.
“Did it end well?”
Evan cuts him a look. “Who said it ended?”
At his words, something twists inside Barty. Suddenly there’s a lump in his throat as he works to get out his next sentence. “Well, you said a long time ago. So I thought that it was a, uh, past thing.”
“Yeah. It was a long time ago. When I… fell in love.”
Barty knows he’s the one who started this conversation, but he really hates the way Evan says love in reference to some mystery person. At least he used past tense, though, meaning it’s a thing of the past.
“So what happened?” Barty questions.
“They didn’t want me in the way I wanted them. Still don’t want me that way.” There’s something bitter in Evan’s tone, and he’s gone back to refusing to look at Barty. In contrast, Barty stares at him intently. He feels as though he’ll be able to see through Evan’s exterior and into his insides, where all his secrets are hidden, if he only looks hard enough.
“Who was it?”
“Does it matter?” Evan’s voice is biting as he sharply turns his head back towards Barty.
“Yes. No. I don’t know.” Barty leans back onto his elbows, tearing his gaze from Evan. It’s almost comical how their positions have changed; now, Evan stares at Barty, and Barty looks out over the lake in an effort to avoid his gaze.
“It was no one important, okay?”
“Oh.” Something settles in Barty when he hears that, even if Evan’s tone contrasts with his dismissive words. “They were—still are—an idiot, though. Just for the record.”
Evan laughs in that disbelieving way of his, as if he’s sharing an inside joke with himself. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” Barty says definitively. “I mean, you’re perfect. And whoever can’t see that is an idiot.”
“Perfect?”
“Yup.” Barty means it, too.
“Yeah, well,” Evan scoffs, “it isn’t good enough for them. So it doesn’t matter.”
“Well, you’re good enough for me,” Barty says hotly. “So don’t worry about that asshole. Because and me? We’re best friends, and you’ll always be good enough for me. You know that, right?”
Evan is avoiding Barty’s gaze again. He picks at the grass next to him, focusing on that instead. “Right,” he says somewhat bitterly.
“I mean it,” Barty insists. “You are.”
Evan looks at him, smiling sadly. “Thanks, Bee. But it’s getting cold. I think I’ll head back inside if that’s all right with you.”
“I—okay. Yeah, uh, sure.”
With that, Evan gets up and begins the walk back to the castle. Barty watches him go, thinking their entire exchange over.
He’s not entirely sure where the conversation went sour enough to get Evan to leave, but clearly something must’ve caused his abrupt departure. Even if Barty had thought he had said the right things to get Evan to cheer up again. He had meant what he said, too; Evan always would be good enough for him. Barty honestly couldn’t imagine a better best friend.
So Evan shouldn’t, Barty thinks heatedly, have ever been hung up on some asshole who couldn’t even see how amazing he is.
Barty continues to sit there, close to the shore of the lake, and watches Evan’s retreating form. And as he watches Evan reach up to wipe at his eyes, trying and failing to act like it was nonchalant gesture, he resolves to find out who Evan was talking about. And he’s going to make them, whoever it may be, pay for how they hurt Barty’s best friend.
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So I wanna tell y'all about something very near and dear to my heart.
This is the Psyche asteroid, or, at least an artist's representation - we don't know what it actually looks like yet, but this is a fair enough guess. It's a roughly 200 mile wide asteroid in the asteroid belt, and it's made almost entirely out of metal. Its composition makes it unique; it’s the only large metallic body we know of in the entire solar system.
We think it might be the core of what used to be a planet.
When solar systems form, they start out as disks made of interstellar gas and dust, called protoplanetary disks. Here's a picture of HL Tauri, one of the best images of a protoplanetary disk we have.
That dust globs together into larger and larger pieces, and eventually forms hundreds of "planetesimals", which are rocky bodies about a kilometer across. Planetesimals had very erratic orbits compared to the modern planets - the dust of the protoplanetary disk caused friction and drag, which threw them off course.
They frequently collided with each other, and either broke apart or stuck together and grew even larger. Arrokoth is actually a leftover planetesimal, a time capsule from the early solar system, and we were able to visit it wayyy out in the Kuiper belt with the New Horizons probe!
Once planetesimals get to be about the size of the moon, we call them "protoplanets". Protoplanets were fundamentally different from their planetesimal siblings - we believe they were differentiated. When an object in space gets big enough, a combination of radioactive decay, impacts, and gravitational pressure causes them to heat up and melt. Denser materials like iron and nickel sink towards their centers, while the lighter materials rise to the surface. The differentiation process is why Earth's core is made of iron, while the surface is primarily rock.
While protoplanet orbits were much more stable than those of planetesimals, they still eventually collided with each other until everything settled into the planets we see today (though gas giants had a few extra steps - that's a different post!).
We think the Psyche asteroid was a protoplanet, well on its way to becoming a bona fide planet, when an impact struck it hard enough to strip away its rocky layers, leaving behind the dense, metallic core - like in this illustration.
More and more, we think the properties of a planet's core are fundamental to its long-term evolution. Venus, Earth, and Mars are all roughly the same size and roughly the same distance from the sun, cosmically speaking, yet they're so different! Venus has hell death clouds, Earth is home, and Mars is dry and dead - why?
The Psyche asteroid gives us the unique opportunity to actually observe a planetary core directly - it's much harder to dig to the center of a planet than it is to go to space, so that's exactly what we're going to do!
On Thursday October 12th at 10:16am Eastern, the Psyche spacecraft will launch and begin its journey to the asteroid belt! You can watch at https://www.nasa.gov/nasatv/!
I've been a part of this mission for over four years now, and I can't speak highly enough of the team that made it happen through all of the ups and downs. Good luck out there, buddy. We're all rooting for you :')
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We will kill the most diverse X-Men team this era has ever seen, but don’t worry, self-described genetic absolutist White Queen will avenge their deaths. The character whose first scene in this project was announcing her intention to act as the capitalist colonial arm of the mutant nation is never criticised or analysed properly for this, and in fact is rewarded with being the revolutionary leader, organising what needs to be done in the fight against the terrorist Orchis. We will show any critics of Krakoa to be nothing more than racist Nazi scum who die horrifying and darkly comedic deaths, to canonise our great and beautiful paradise ethnostate as the dream we all shared, that was ripped apart from us by jealous fools. Both powerful enough to pull off that feat, but not powerful enough to stop Kitty-now-Kate Pryde from going through a goddamn door. Simultaneously strong enough to defeat mutantkind at their strongest and proudest, and weak enough that they grovel for forgiveness the moment they’re defeated. These depictions are not unique to superhero comics–but ethnostates are. Using these tricks when you’re writing an era that’s opening moment sets up the direct comparison to Israel is, bluntly, disgusting, and shameful. It is disgusting if it is intentional, and it is still disgusting if it is accidental. The promise of an interesting story with a harrowing fallout is gone, and all that remains are the lies of fascists put in the mouths of characters whose revenge we are supposed to root for.
Wrote an essay discussing my feelings on the fallout and legacy of Krakoa. I also have a substack ver if wordpress doesn't work for everyone.
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some thoughts on Snape and James
Dumbledore explains this to Harry after we've just found out how exactly James saved Severus, and I think that's important. As we know, his prediction about Wormtail came true in DH. Severus believed that James had just done it to save his friends from expulsion, but I don't think this is true, I think it's a product of his (understandable) bias towards James. Dumbledore (whatever his faults) is generally a very good judge of character in his later life:
He accepts Sirius's story in PoA without proof because it simply makes more sense to him given what he knows about the characters involved. He accepts Sev's claim that he wants to protect Lily when it could be a trick, as Sev is very good at Occlumency. He knows Draco won't be capable of murdering him. He knows exactly the ways that each member of the trio will act in their search for the Hallows.
So I think it's fair to say that Dumbledore knew that James was NOT just risking his life out of selfish reasons. I think this is a big reason Dumbledore holds James in such high esteem. Even at his worst, James wasn't willing to let his enemy die. Therefore the same bond that exists between Pettigrew and Harry also exists between Sev and James. They'd probably be as happy about that as Harry is about Pettigrew, but, to paraphrase Dumbledore, too bad lol. Anyway:
So where does this bond come in for Snape and James? Imo, it's in Severus dedicating his life to protect James Potter's son. Yes, he did it for Lily. But I also think the bond had something to do with it. Possibly if he had just been in love with Lily that wouldn't have been strong enough, he could have just retreated into the shadows to mourn her. Maybe he wouldn't have, but imo it's a factor as well, whether he's aware of it or not. (probably not) And also somewhat a factor in why he agrees pretty quickly to hiding all the Potters, not just Lily.
This is my hc but I think Snape, despite his hatred for James, despite what James put him through, almost kind of ... trusted him to keep Lily safe when they went their separate ways after school. He knows firsthand that James is a capable duellist, and there's almost this sort of... seething respect there going both ways idk. I absolutely think Severus blamed James for not living up to this, first by knocking her up lol and then by failing to protect her the night of her death. ALTHOUGH I think he would have, in his own way, grudgingly respected the bravery of James facing Voldemort without his wand so Lily could escape, had he known about it, because imo Severus would have done the same, both men would knowingly lay down their life for Lily.
With the war and the end of school, things are shifting between them. Both have chosen opposite sides of the conflict. They've grown up, and Sev is now able to give as good as he gets. (none of this is excusing James's bullying btw I don't believe in that) but I think they leave school on more equal footing than they've ever had. Out in the real world, popularity and being a quidditch star and whatever don't matter. It's gone, and there's just the war.
I think Sev's relationship with James is very different than it is with Sirius. With Sirius they never really grow out of that schoolboy hatred, and both of them would happily see each other drop dead without blinking an eye. With James I think it's much more complex. His hatred for James is deeply uniquely personal and completely colours the way he treats Harry. Like the real rivalry is between James and Snape, Sirius is just sort of an add-on to this. Snape brings up James constantly, like bro is a little obsessed but whatever. The bond, to Sev's eternal frustration, is always there.
I've said this before but my personal opinion is that James would have forgiven Sev had he known about everything he did to protect Harry. I don't think they'd ever have been friends lol but unlike Sirius (and Remus imo) I think James would have respected him for it, for his bravery. For doing exactly as he would have if their places had been reversed (that would be an interesting fic tbh I'm sure someone's done that)
I'll sort of bring this up in my own fic in one of my fave scenes I've written between them:
“Just—” Sev stops, unable to force the words out, so sickened is he by the thought of what he has to say.
“Just what?” Potter says coldly.
“Just— keep her safe.”
A flicker of surprise passes over Potter’s face, but it quickly pulls back into a frown. He nods, tightly. “And you. You stay away from her. You know what they are. You know what they’ll do to her.”
It costs him everything he has, but, finally, Severus jerks his head.
Anyway I find their dynamic super interesting, as they are both two of my favourite characters. Obviously James bullying Sev is totally unjustified, as is Sev bullying his son years later (clearly as revenge, now that he finally finds himself with the upper hand). They're compared to Draco and Harry a few times I think, and I think Harry doesn't see this because he wrongly identifies as his father when actually his role was much more like Snape's in this dynamic, which is what he sees in SWM. A lot of jealousy going both ways, but one of them (at first) clearly has more privilege and is much more vindictive and cruel to the other. Draco and Harry nodding at each other on the platform is on some level representative of the "moving on" that Severus and James never achieved.
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