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phenomenalgirl9 · 10 months

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Jungkook x Reader: I loved you so bad

Summary: This is Part 2 of Lost You, you will surely keep the baby, but what of you and him?

A/n: don't cancel me, I'm very nervous about this part. I just wrote Lost you thinking nobody will read and poured out feelings in it. Even this one is filled with feelings. I really hope you guys liked it.

W/c: a lil more than 2k

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You sat on the floor in front of the bed in the spare room that Jimin and Chan like to call Y/n's Room. You were staring into the blank wall, the gamjajeon that Jimin had made for you long forgotten. A single tear left your eye and you didn't even realise, not until you heard Jimin calling for you and you quickly wiped it away. "Someone's here to see you," he said. "I don't-" you started but he just nodded his head and heard footsteps the next moment. You put your head down only to be engulfed in a warm hug, more like the person enveloping you. You looked up to see Mingyu, his always cheerful face had bo spec of joy.

"What happened to us?" Was the first thing he psaid as he looked at you, his eyes filling with tears as well. "Mingyu-" you were interrupted before you could say anything. "I'm gonna divorce her" he said, and you went stunt. He continued "she tried to get all my assets under her name, even company shares! She's a sneaky b-" he stopped himself. "I realise why you, Jihyo and Chan were so hostile towards her. I'm so sorry! It's all too late now" and with this he broke down and this time you rushed over to hug him. He hugged you tight as well and said "I'm so sorry for unloading on you and for everything that happened" he said. "Jungkook fucked up, but that's not your fault. Let's not dig dead birds" you said and wiped his eyes and sat down. "What did you think of doing?" He asked and you looked at him confused, he looked towards your stomach and then to your eyes. "It's my baby, I'm keeping it regardless" you said. He smiled his cheeky boyish smile "you're gonna be a great mom" he said.

"Well you'd be a greater mom if you'd leave the house" you heard and turned to see Chan at the door of the room "Come to the office, there's so much left for you to do" he said and you smiled and nodded, Jimin appeared from behind him and cheered. These two have been dating for two years after Jimin became your assistant. You phone rang and you looked at it to see your mom's number, you silenced it and looked back to find surprised faces, as your mother and you were very close and it was unlikely you would not receive her call. "She keeps telling be to either abbot the baby or give it away. I will not, I can manage" you said firmly. "You're not alone, you have uncles," Chan said, making you laugh. Suddenly you heard another voice saying "and aunty", as Jihyo appears and rushes to hug you. "I'm going to break that fucker's face Chanie is coming with me" she said and you all laughed. You all missed this, this laughter had been long gone, you all came down all together to meet and talk. Minji would generally be gatekeeping Mingyu and Jungkook barely cared. You all missed what it used to be like. Mingyu joined your hug and so did Chan. "Jimin get here" you mumbled and he was included in your group hug.

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You looked up through the glass of your office to find Jimin standing and talking to a very known figure. The person saying something and Jimin vigorously shaking his head a no and guarding his way. You sighed and walked out, as soon as his eyes trailed on you you almost saw a gleam in his eyes. May be you were imagining it you thought laughing internally. "Office hours are for official purposes only. If there's no official requirement, then leave" you said and were about to turn around and leave. When he called out "you did not renew the contract. It was signed by our fathers" he said. You clenched your fists and turned and said "I made a new contract, as far as the old one concerns my father has passed away and in no way would discourage me to not improve the company stardards because of sentiments. Now if you'll excuse me Mr Jeon, Jimin meet me inside for a minute please" you said and walked back to your cabin smiling at the person you were having a meeting with and apologized for leaving. You quickly wrote a note and handed it to Jimin and motioned towards Jungkook who just kept looking at you through the glass.

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Jungkook stood there talking to Jimin asking him yet again to let him see Y/n just once. Jimin never opened the door for him when Jungkook had gone to their apartment to meet Y/n. And he was failing here as well, he couldn't make a scene here, he can't let things get worse. As he spoke to Jimin he watched how you takked an interacted to who seemed like your new business associate. Sitting on that chair was no other than Min Yoongi, no way you were having business with him, Yoongi was your senior back in high school and in college as well and he made it very clear back then that he liked you. You even went to senior year prom with Yoongi, as he had gine with Minji.

He remembered the way Y/n's eyes looked at him over Yoongi's shoulder when he was dancing with Minji. Suddenly, you stood up and walked outside. You refused to look at him at first but later when you did your eyes looked dead at him, unlikely of how you looked at Yoongi or even Jimin.

Once Jimin came out after talking to you he handed Jungkook a note.

"Company cafe 12:30 pm, 15 minutes"

He looked towards his watch and found he had to wait an hour, so he did.

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"Seriously Y/n I thought you were better than this" Yoongi said, "I thought so too, I've just been dumb" you said. "Doesn't mean you have to stay dumb and keep on hurting yourself" he said.

"We're here for thr business, Yoongi" you told him. "Then come out on a dinner with me where there will be no business talk" he said, the weight of his look was too much so you dropped your gaze. You shouldn't have, because you noticed the way his dress shirt hugged his body and his now, broad shouders. His veiny hands that rested together on the table along with his beautiful fingers. Min Yoongi is a desirable and polished man, yiu knew that, but it could be due to the hormones but you felt like you saw him in a new light. You nodded your head and smiled at you, that smile suddenly made all the rest of your worries disappear. "Today, I'll pick you up at 7pm, text me the address" he said as he stood up and picked his coat and extended his hand to shake, as you thought. But the moment you presented yours he brought it to his lips and kissed it. "See you" he said with a gummy grin and left.

You sighed and sat down as Jimin looked at Yoongi and then at you with excited eyes that told you, that he saw what just happened. You looked at the time, and it was 12.50pm already, so you headed towards the cafe.

"What do you want?" You asked the moment you sat down infront of him. "When will you come back home?" He asked. You chuckled "home?" You asked cocking your eyebrown. Jungkook looked taken aback "our apartment" he said, damn he had so much hope in his eyes, you wished this was atleast few months ago, cause that Y/n would had ran and hugged him. But the Y/n you are today doesn't give a fuck about this, rather you feel repulsed. "I am not going back, at least not now, I need time to process what I want. And to confirm you, yes I am pregnant, you are welcome to stay in his or her life but I don't think there will be anything much between us. We can co-parent if you want." You said and Jungkook's head was down. "Will you never return to me? Have I lost you?" He asked. "You should have thought about that when you went to Minji when I needed you!" You whisper yelled. "I didn't understand back then, I didn't know. I was dumb please-" he tried to reach for you but you backed away. "I've told you what I had to say. I'll go now, I have work and I think, so do you" you said and stood up and walked away. Jungkook noticed his phone had 3 missed calls from Minji, he shook his head and stepped into his car and drove towards his office.

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It was 6.58pm when Jimin let you know that Yoongi had arrived with a smirk on his face. You had considered if moving out but Chan and Jimin insisted on staying with them (two men) for the pregnancy and birth so that they can help during and after the delivery. Hence, you continued staying

Yoongi took your hand into his and lead the way, he opened your car door for you to settle in before closing it and walked to his side. The two of you reminisce about old times, Yoongi very cunningly avoided any talk that involved your now ex-boyfriend.

In the restaurant, being the gentleman that he is, he pulled your chair for you. "Wine? Sir?" A waitress asked and he shook his head a no "juice for us" he said. You looked at him surprised and he said "you shouldn't drink when you are pregnant" he said. "You know?" You asked in shock. "Your mother might have called me up to tell me" he said, fixing his hair, a habit he has when he is nervous. "Are you aiming to talk me out of it?" You asked. "Y/n, this is your baby, you do whatever you feel is right. I will always support you" he paused to take a breath and said "I would love it if you'd let me stay beside you" he said looking at you. You remember this look on his face the same one when he had asked you to prom and when he asked you out on Valentine's day in college. Both times Jungkook was the first thing that came to your mind. "Let's see how we go then" you said, flashing a smile and he flashed a gummy smile at you and held your hand, rubbing comforting circles on the back of your palm.

You remember those times during high school when Yoongi used to almost force himself into your room and refused to move on days when Jungkook ditched you for Minji. You thought he pitied you, so once you had told him "you don't need to do this! I'm not really looking for your pity". "I'm not here because I pity you. I am here because I want to, I'd rather you spend time with me than that jerk, or better to say than waiting for that jerk" he said. You remember how even when you were young he used to give you candies and chocolates. Even though his father and you didn't really see eye to eye, that never stopped Yoongi from being around you.

"Why are you doing this?" You asked him when he asked you out to prom. "Mr Jerk asked Little Ms Bitch to prom, do you wanna be a loser and go alone?" He teased, "I won't be alone, I'll go with my friends" you said and his face judgy face said he won't take that shit, so you said yes. Yoongi was good, he always cared about how you felt and never overstepped your boundaries, if only you could like him then things would be better, you used to think. Even in college, when Yoongi had to partner up with a junior he had written your name without hesitation. You always enjoyed your time with him. "You know how I feel about you, I feel worse when I see you wasting your love on him" he had once said.

Thus, when your contract was over with Jungkook, you reached out to him and he immediately agreed to this deal. You found out, even working with Yoongi was better than working with Jungkook as you generally did most of the planning with Chan, but Yoongi had important inputs to place and ideas that enriched your plans. You took so long to see him, you wasted so much feelings and time, when this person was there for you all along. Even in a crowded room all you saw was Jungkook, who's eyes would be instilled on Minji, but Yoongi's were always on you.

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As dumb as luck could be there sat Jungkook in a corner of the same hotel on the same floor as you and Yoongi sat with his board of directors having a business dinner. He clenched his teeth as he watched you laugh at Yoongi's jokes and he reached out to hold your hand. The images flashed in front of his eyes when he reached out for you this morning and you curled into yourself.

He remembered how you used to look at him with the same eyes as you are now looking at Yoongi. He now remembers how slowly that light started dimming and that night the light in your eyes wasn't there when you looked at him. His mind reminded him of all those promises he broke, dates he missed, of all the lost time that he put behind someone whom he shouldn't have given daylight to. He remembered all those tears he made you shed. You've been there for him all this time and he dared to take your presence for granted. He dared to think you'd wait around for him forever? How could he make the most important person of his life feel like shit. Maybe Mingyu was right, he did try to tell him about Minji's malicious intentions months ago, but Jungkook only saw that Mingyu was mistreating Minji. He refused to see the truth time and again and lost the last chance he had to bring himself back, to correct himself. Now, all he has were your memories and the child you promise to let him co-parent, maybe that's enough for him, it has to be. He lost you and it was his own fucking fault.

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Taglist: @bbl32 @back2bluesidex @cherryblossom-2004 @welcometomyworld13 @chaconnelatte @ane102 @kookswifesblog @crvame @mschievous247 (couldn't tag)

Masterlist

#imagines #bts x reader #bts #bangtan fanfic #bts imagines #bangtan #bangtan x reader #bts angst #jungkook angst #boyfriend jungkook #jungkook fluff #yoongi fluff #yoongi fic #jeon jungkook x reader #yoongi x reader #bts yoongi #bts jeon jungguk

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cerise-on-top · 27 days

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A fluff alphabet for Kate? Also I wish you luck on your test on friday!!!! I failed my drivers test three times so I feet you

Hey! Thank you, it's gonna be rough tomorrow, but I'm gonna pull through! I will get that driver's license! But I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who failed ^^;

Fluff Alphabet for Laswell

A ctivities - What do they like to do with their s/o? How do they spend their free time with them?

Laswell loves going to museums and stuff like that. Not only does she get to have fun with you, she also gets to learn things that may or may not come in handy eventually. She’d especially love to go to a museum that showcases something you’re interested in as well. Although she may not like how bustling they can be at times, she just loves seeing and hearing about new things. And if you’re enjoying yourself too? Two birds with one stone.

B eauty - What do they admire about their s/o? What do they think is beautiful about them?

I think Laswell could admire your wits and your intelligence. You don’t have to know every single little detail about everything, but she loves how your eyes light up when you animatedly talk about something you’re passionate about, how you give her the seemingly most useless fun facts about something she normally couldn’t care less about. She admires how passionate you are about one thing or another. She hasn’t really been into something this much in a long time, which she kind of misses, but she gets to live that passion through you again.

C omfort - How would they help their s/o when they feel down/have a panic attack etc.?

She’d try to rationalize everything. In her eyes, most things should follow some form of logic, so she’s not a very emotional person either. She knows that doesn’t hold true for emotions, but instead of beating yourself up over something that wasn’t your fault to begin with, why not think about the good things that happened? If you’re experiencing a panic attack she’ll start breathing with you, trying to calm you down. She won’t touch you, though, since that’s likely the last thing you need. Will shoo away any onlookers there may be.

D reams - How do they picture their future with their s/o?

I think she’d just want to live in a pretty spacious apartment with you. She doesn’t necessarily need a pet either, but she does want a patio. Will want to look after some plants with you, grow some of your own. She wants to have a domestic life with you, one, where she doesn’t need to worry about either of you getting killed because of her job. However, she’s looking forward to retirement, as much as she does love her job. Something about waking up with you next to her just feels right to her.

E qual - Are they the dominant one in the relationship, or rather passive?

She can go either way. Sometimes she’s more dominant, sometimes she’s more passive. If you’re on the passive side, then she’ll take on the dominant role, if you’re on the dominant side then she’ll usually be on the passive one. However, she will be dominant from time to time, making known what she thinks when it counts. But if it’s something like choosing a restaurant to eat at, then you can decide. But if you don’t want to or can’t, then she’ll happily take the burden off your shoulder.

F ight - Would they be easy to forgive their s/o? How are they fighting?

She knows you usually don’t mean what you say in the heat of the moment, so she forgives you after she’s cooled down a bit. However, you might wanna show a bit of remorse for fighting with her as well. Laswell, when annoyed, becomes a bit snippy, but it’s nothing too bad, she usually has her emotions under control. She doesn’t yell, she doesn’t shout, she just hisses at you from time to time, but that’s about it. Give her some time to calm down and all will be well.

G ratitude - How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their s/o is doing for them?

She’s a pretty grateful woman. She knows that having a partner as great and lovely as you isn’t a given, especially not the fact that you always tend to help her out whenever you can. You lend her an ear, you help her with the house chores, you become a safe anchor for her. She’s truly grateful to have you in her life. Usually she shows it by giving you little gifts since that’s her way of showing love. Small trinkets to jewelry, anything goes.

H onesty - Do they have secrets they hide from their s/o? Or do they share everything?

Yes, there are plenty of things she doesn’t tell you. She’s CIA, so naturally she can’t tell you everything that’s going on. She doesn’t tell you everything about her past either. It’s not that she doesn’t want to, if you ask her to tell you something she will, but she doesn’t deem it that important anymore to herself. The past is the past, and that’s it. There’s nothing more to it and she doesn’t want to dwell on it either, so she just leaves it behind.

I nspiration - Did their s/o change them somehow, or the other way around? Like trying out new things or helped them overcome personal problems?

Like Nikolai, I think she’s become a pretty solid person on her own by the time you’ve met. However, I could see her changing you for the better. Laswell is a very caring woman, but she can also be a bit fussy when worried. She’ll likely tell you to take better care of herself. You will, because she keeps nagging at you to do so. If you ever need anything to take care of yourself, like meds or any other kind of aid, she’s more than happy to either pay for it or help you pay for it. She’ll likely do what she can to help you become better.

J ealousy - Do they get jealous easily? How do they deal with it?

Laswell doesn’t get jealous very easily. She’s a diplomat, if she wants someone to leave then she’ll just talk them into doing so. So, Laswell doesn’t deal with jealousy very often. Besides, if you want to spend time with someone else, make new connections, then she won’t stop you. Having connections is one of the most important things out there, so she’ll actively encourage you to go out and talk to people other than her. But if you want, you can start small and just talk to her friends for now.

K iss - Are they a good kisser? What was the first kiss like?

Laswell has had a few girlfriends in the past, but nothing that lasted too long, unfortunately. She’s kissed them here and there and was pretty decent at it. She’s not bad at kissing, definitely not as clumsy as, say, Farah. The first kiss with her would be short but sweet. She’d just stargaze with you and ask you if she could kiss you. Again, the kiss wouldn’t last long, but the soft and tender gaze she gave you afterwards was ingrained into your brain forever. She still looks at you like that when she thinks you aren’t looking.

L ove Confession - How would they confess to their s/o?

I think she’d take you on a fancy “date” first. She’d take you to a nice restaurant and then to an aquarium, a planetarium or a museum so you can have fun there together. Afterwards she’d take you to a nice and open field where she’d confess to you. No gifts, but she wants that day to be one you can remember forever. Besides, maybe she could sway you into saying yes by having a nice day with you before confessing.

M arriage - Do they want to get married? How do they propose? What would the marriage be like?

Yes, Laswell wants to get married. She’d propose during a holiday, like Christmas, or any other holiday you celebrate. And if you don’t celebrate anything then she’ll propose to you on your birthday. She’d get on one knee and pull out the ring in the middle of the restaurant. She does want that free dessert, in all honesty. Marriage with her would be sweet. You’d both have your duties together and work on them together. You’d go on dates fairly often, you’d go on vacation. If you work at something like an amusement park, then she’ll come visit you as well and just chat with you for a while.

N icknames - What do they call their s/o?

Her nicknames aren’t very fancy. They’re the classic ones you’d expect from her. Something along the lines of my love, sweetheart and sweetie. However, if you know at least two languages, or if your native tongue isn’t English, then she’ll call you pet names in those other languages as well. If she knows that language, that’s great, if she doesn’t, then she’ll simply learn it. Either way, you will be loved in every language you know, Laswell stops at nothing to attain that.

O n Cloud Nine - What are they like when they are in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?

It’s not very obvious. She usually keeps her relationships professional and doesn’t get closer to people than she needs to. So she wouldn’t give you any special treatment just because she’s in love with you. If you’re shy, then she’s more inclined to start a conversation with you and invite you for some coffee, but she won’t go out of her way for anything else. If anything, once she realizes she’s in love with you she might avoid you a bit and hope that the feelings will go away on their own.

P DA - Are they upfront about their relationship? Do they brag with their s/o in front of others? Or are they rather shy to kiss etc. when others are watching?

No, Laswell doesn’t brag. She doesn’t tell very many people about you either. Not everyone needs to know about you since it will put in you danger, which she doesn’t want. The people close to her know about you, so Nikolai and the TF141 and a select few other people, but no one else. It’s no one’s business that you’re dating. She doesn’t do PDA either. She’s not at all a big fan of it and believes that those kinds of acts of affection should be kept behind closed doors.

Q uirk - Some random ability they have that’s beneficial in a relationship.

She’s extremely observant, rational and can use her words very well. It’ll be rare for Laswell to offend you, she carefully chooses her words before speaking since the peace of an entire country could depend on that. She knows what kind of effect certain words have on you and will use that to her advantage. Not for evil, mind you, but to make you feel better, more confident, and happied. Laswell loves you too much to be mean to you and use her abilities for evil.

R omance - How romantic are they? What would they do to make their s/o happy? Cliché or rather creative?

Laswell is rather cliched when it comes to romance. She loves going on walks with you, going to aquariums and just watching awful movies together. She could be creative if she wanted to be, but she thinks a normal romance suffices for her. It doesn’t need to be anything fancy, something basic will do just fine. Besides, you likely won’t get hurt while eating at a candlelit dinner. You might get hurt while scuba diving, though.

S upport - Are they helping their s/o achieve their goals? Do they believe in them?

Yes. Laswell is an older lady, she knows a lot of things about life by now. If you need advice, she’s there for you. If you need her help in any other way then she’ll do what she can to assist you. Just give her the word and she’ll do just about anything for you. She definitely does believe in you and that you can achieve just about anything you set your mind to. As long as your goals aren’t detrimental to your health, she’ll support just about anything you do.

T hrill - Do they need to try out new things to spice out your relationship? Or do they prefer a certain routine?

No, she doesn’t particularly need anything new. She gets the unexpected and new at her job pretty much every day. She loves having a routine with nothing unexpected popping up, it helps her relax. Sure, you can try some unfamiliar food together, or you can drive to a new city and go shopping there, but she doesn’t particularly want something new every day. Having a routing is nice, it means everything is going according to plan for once and she doesn’t need to fear anything.

U nderstanding - How good do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?

She knows you pretty well by the time you’re together. It takes years for Laswell to be in a relationship with someone, so she’ll know you pretty well by then. Besides, she can read people like they’re open books, and that does include you as well. She’s somewhat empathetic, but not a lot. Sure, she can feel the emotions of others if she’s close with them, but she doesn’t feel them as intensely as the other person.

V alue - How important is the relationship to them? What is it’s worth in comparison to other things in their life?

Your relationship is pretty important to her. I’d say your relationship is slightly more important to her than her job. Sure, she won’t just quit because you tell her to, but she will take your feelings into consideration as well. She’s well aware you want her to be safe and sound, but she just can’t always guarantee that. Sure, she’ll do her best to come home to you at the end of the day unscathed, but you can’t expect her to quit something that’s so important to her. She will argue with you about that as well, she’s not afraid to speak her mind.

W ild Card - A random Fluff Headcanon.

Her favorite animal is the lamb, so you’ve likely gifted her a small keychain with a cuddle little lamb on it. It’s her favorite item. Sure, it’s nothing special, but it means the world to her. She takes it with her wherever she goes. Laswell has given you a matching keychain and plushies of your favorite animal to show her gratitude as well. Life is a constant give and take, she wants you to feel loved and cared for as well. Whatever you do, Laswell will outdo you and do something even greater. It becomes a competition at some point.

X OXO - Are they very affectionate? Do they love to kiss and cuddle?

She’s affectionate in her own ways. Does she love giving you gifts and doing something for you? Yes, absolutely. Does she love to kiss and cuddle? Not particularly. Sure, she’ll kiss you in the morning before she leaves for work, and she’ll cuddle you if you really insist on doing so, but she’s not a very cuddly person. Too much physical contact irritates her greatly, so you better respect that or else your relationship won’t work out for too long. Laswell has her boundaries. She respects yours, so she expects you to do the same.

Y earning - How will they cope when they’re missing their partner?

She has a picture of the both of you sitting at the beach together in her wallet, which she looks at when she misses you. If she can, she will just call you to hear your voice, doesn’t matter if it’s midnight for her at the time. If she wants to hear from you then she will. Besides, calling you eases her nerves as well. Sure, she doesn’t get as anxious about something happening to you, she’s a rather calm person in general, but she will miss you if she’s gone for too long. Keeps in contact with you, if her mission allows it.

Z eal - Are they willing to go to great lenghts for the relationship? If so, what kind of?

Yes, she is. She breaks the law on the regular anyway, but she doesn’t mind doing it for you. She’d torture someone for you if you got kidnapped. It’s not her style to just kill someone like that unless she has good reason to, but she can be very petty if something were to happen to you. She can deprive someone of their freedom very easily and make sure they never see the sunlight again. She’ll have them thrown in the worst jail imaginable, just to make sure you’ll never be hurt again.

#cod #cod x reader #kate laswell #kate laswell x reader #I think I'm gonna stop taking these from now on #these are so tiring to write especially if people keep requesting the entire thing for a character #I've mentioned that I only take a few letters at a time for a character at this point and I think I will stand by that #I genuinely can't type anymore today I'm so tired #I didn't sleep well and now I've been writing for almost three hours #I think I'll leave it at that and won't put too much in the tags anymore #thank you for the request! have a nice day though!

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drakaripykiros130ac · 5 months

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I don't understand how anyone can like the Greens in the series. I like them in the books because they are good villains, specifically Alicent. I would have given anything to see her come to life on screen rather than the pathetic thing we were treated to. That doesn't help with the fact that apparently Ryan Condal has finally confirmed he's team Greens... I'll never understand this guy. How could he read the book and say that no, the Greens were justified in any way ?! Also, the guts you have to have, even within this fandom, to openly say you support the group of misogynistic and blood purist usurpers... In the sense of saying that they are completely right or that Blacks are just as horrible! But in what universe ?! Ryan Condal would also have said that we would probably change preferred camps in season 2... Man, you can still dream, even with your stupid supporting documents for TG everyone still prefers the Blacks team. It's distressing that the director of the series himself doesn't understand anything he's adapting and that so many people are going in this direction. The number of idiots who tried to explain to me that both teams were equally horrible, that the Greens can't be pure villains because GRRM only writes complex characters, it's obvious. Like GRRM has never written a pure villain ? Are you sure you've read the books he wrote ? No but I swear that since the release of the series, asoiaf fans are worse than before in their unjustified hatred of the Targaryens... These people think they are moral by wanting to put the two teams on the same level or by saying that the Blacks are worse. That revolts me.

Essentially what neutrals think ;

“Yes, it’s not good what the Greens did, but the Blacks are no better seen as they dared to fight back for their rights.”

Like... What dimension did I land in ?!

Just last time, I received comments from someone supposedly accepting that the Greens were worse, but trying to explain to me that Daemon groomed Rhaenyra (which is false book or series), that the murder of 'a Greens child is unjustified (while the Greens shed blood first and we are in a feudal context) that Lucerys taking Aemond's eye is unjustified (Wtf ?!) ah and the best thing was to me say at face value that Daemon was not a gray character and that he was like Aegon IV... (Again... WTF ?!)

https://www.tumblr.com/darklinaforever/701570671006875648/i-hate-when-people-say-greens-and-blacks-are-on

(Afterwards I wasn't gentle in my answers either, but I'm fed up with this type of people)

I personally never liked the greens in the book. To me, they were always the villains. Always. I never viewed Daemon and Rhaenyra as pure innocent angels, don’t get me wrong. I recognize the few mistakes Rhaenyra makes in the book, as well as Daemon’s many, many faults.

For instance, yes, Rhaenyra should not have had Vaemond murdered (even though what he spoke was treasonous and threatened her position as well as the lives of her children). She should not have gone so far with the taxes during her reign (even though she was left with no choice).

However, in this story, despite all their faults, I always felt Rhaenyra and Daemon were perfectly justified. Because their good qualities kind of eclipse the bad stuff. The Blacks are the anti-heroes of the story. They have done some questionable things, but all of them have been justified/done with good reason and good purpose.

The Greens are a whole different story. Everything they have done (mainly Alicent and Otto), they have done out of jealousy and pure greed (hence why they were given the color “green” - the color of greed and envy). 95 % of the war crimes are done by the Greens. Literally the only thing the Blacks are to be held accountable for is B&C. Other than that, every crime was courtesy of the Greens.

To me, the Greens have always been split between those who are anti-villains (Aegon, Helaena, Daeron), and those who are pure villains (Alicent, Otto, Aemond).

For the anti-villains: The one time Aegon presents some goodness is when he has reservations about usurping his half-sister. Other than that, he is pure evil; Helaena can’t be considered a pure innocent soul either. She has good qualities, but she is extremely underdeveloped as a character in the book and we don’t know her thoughts, her motives. She didn’t protest the usurpation and accepted the position of queen consort easily; Daeron is somehow given a free pass by certain people because he is “the daring”, and while that’s true, these people forget how he burned a whole village of innocent people alive.

For the pure villains, not much need be said. Alicent and Otto are a bunch of opportunistic hypocrites and vicious upstarts. I haven’t sensed any bit of goodness in them. Aemond is a psycho with zero redeeming qualities.

Now, in the show, I don’t feel as if the Greens are portrayed better than they have been in the book. I feel like the show writers (mainly Ryan Condal) are trying to come up with lame excuses for them, and it’s just not working. The great majority of the viewers still hate Alicent as much as they did in the book, regardless how many times she presents those “doe eyes”, and the great majority still believe the Greens are in the wrong.

In the show, when it comes to the Greens, there’s always some sort of “reason”, some sort of “accident”. Alicent didn’t mean to shoot her mouth off and convince Larys to murder the current hand, Lyonel Strong, so that her father could return as Hand (even though that is exactly what she wanted). Aemond didn’t mean to let Vhagar know that he wants Lucerys dead (even though his pursuing and direct attack showed his intentions to murder the boy). Crispin somehow didn’t mean to crush Beesbury’s skull in that ball, even though he acted aggressively towards the man for simply speaking the truth and nothing but the truth at that treasonous Council meeting.

These excuses the show writers make for the greens make no sense whatsoever. They should have stuck with the actual canon portrayal, because it’s just ridiculous at this point.

So what if the two sides are not evenly matched?

They’re not supposed to!

GRRM doesn’t write purely good vs bad in his universe, that is true. He loves the complexity of the characters and the stories. However, that does not mean that he intended for the Blacks and the Greens to be evenly matched in this story.

He himself admitted that he wrote the book more in the Blacks’ favor because that’s how he felt (ironic, considering that Fire and Blood is told from the point of view of green supporters). It’s his story. I have seen people accuse him of being biased, always in favor of the Blacks.

Yes, he clearly wrote the Blacks as the protagonists, with better developed characters, with the best allies, the most heroic/epic deaths, most dragons, most Houses supporting them.

I mean, the Starks are TB, while the Lannisters are TG. That alone should give you a clue as to which side you’re supposed to be rooting for.

Clearly GRRM is Team Black, but who says he can’t be? Who says that the sides have to be evenly matched? It’s his story! If he says the Blacks are right, the Blacks are right.

TG stans are just in denial at this point.

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blackjack-15 · 4 months

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the way nat is treated is sooo sad and predictable. she doesn't always (present day) handle things well, but...with an upbringing like this? and good on her for pouring the liquor down the drain and bringing paper towels

"oh you're gonna make sprite?" "yeah, i'm gonna make sprite" that's carmy in a nutshell. push on a wall, it becomes a bridge.

"holding everything in and then letting it out inappropriately" you've reduced the bear to its most basic components!

he made sprite! something from nearly nothing, that's carmy. and no one even thanks him to his face. he didn't have to do it, he was doing 6 other things at once, and he still made sprite for someone who was having a hard time

also richie's ex wife reminds me strongly of mrs. berzatto. just saying.

"why isn't someone listening to me?" "i'm listening" "WHY IS NO ONE LISTENING TO ME" and this is mrs berzatto at a 4/5? we're gonna see her at a 6+ before long

i hate to armchair-diagnose, but there's pretty obviously a personality disorder present here in the Matriarch of the Berzatto clan. histrionic personality disorder is my immediate thought, but could be something else.

"no one's f//kin with you why would you think that?" gee i wonder.

"we ran into the love of your life" "i don't have a love of my life" 1) they're 100% talking about claire 2) carmy baby. you're so right you don't yet.

wow i hate mikey/richie right now. but! this adds a whole new dimension to carmy re: claire! because claire is tied to mikey, to what mikey 'wanted' for carmy, and that makes this whole thing come full circle, doesn't it?

"what did you do. what did you do." maybe christmas in copenhagen would have been a good idea.

carmy's absolute distaste for this whole 'conversation' (the glasses came off? the body is banging? really guys? you're being disgusting) is beautiful. carmy's got many, many vices and makes a lot of mistakes, but this is Not something he puts up with

"i don't understand why you would do this. why are you like this" oh carmy honey.

"i'm not in love with her, that's what i'm saying, where did you guys get that?"

THERE IT IS.

there's the reason for showing how carmy reacts when someone wants something from him, why the awful phone conversation with claire has her making him go from not wanting to give his number to saying "i want you to have my number". we have to see how carmy goes from saying no -- the truth -- to saying yes -- a lie -- after pressure is put on him. because this is where it starts.

claire represents what others want for carmy. normalcy, a chance -- his "only" chance -- to be with someone deemed societally Valuable. to not be an "other", to fit in, to have something "Good" that everyone thinks is good. carmy/claire is nauseating, but it's supposed to be. people spend so much time on screen telling us how Good claire is, when the show itself doesn't back it up. she's a figure of myth, a representation of the expectations others set on carmy and that he bows to, not a character. full stop.

and wow this is legitimately hard to watch. carmy attempts to set boundary, boundary is ignored. rinse, repeat.

they think carmy's in love with her -- this is a man in his, what, late 20s at this point? -- because he used to draw her in high school? the tenuous is getting more tenuous my Gosh.

"carm. this is a good thing." oh and no it really really isn't.

okay nice moment here for richie. does he think carmy is weird? yeah. does he still kinda brag about his sprite-making abilities? yeah

okay, ex wife is the worst. the boy makes you sprite b/c you don't feel good and there's none in the house and you ask why they'd 'punish' a nice girl like claire by hooking carmy up with her?

richie is adorable with his daughter and despite everything going wrong in his life (both his fault and not) is a really good dad ("do you think that she'll like us?" is such a soft question). i am really, really glad he's divorced. i want him to find happiness -- i don't know what that would look like for him just yet, but.

"we just have to not be like our parents" the other distillation of the bear!

richie trying to get a better job for his kid is really sweet. mikey telling the bill murray story in the background? hilarious

we're further breaking down the Mythos of Mikey -- he's introduced as a perfect, tragic figure, and we've spent a season and a half showing his foibles...which are Many.

#the bear #liveblogging #2X06 #THIS EPISODE IS SO STRESSFUL #anti claire bear #kinda?? more pointing out that she's a Narrative Tool but #this episode is at an 8 for crazy already and something tells me we're gonna break the knob off past 10

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justmenoworries · 6 months

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Lore Olympus Episode 254 Spoilers

So, Apollo succesfully poisoned Zeus and, through a series of extremely convenient coincidences, has managed to get Eros and Psyche, the only two deities who know it was him, out of the way for now.

Does he...

A) ...keep away from the scene of the crime, so as to not be associated or draw suspicion onto himself

B) ...pretend to not know what Zeus is afflicted with and call emergency services together with Hebe to feign being a worried son so that he's less likely to be suspected by the authorities

or C) ...unecessarily frame someone else with no solid evidence whatsoever and call not medical services or the police, but the media, in the process getting as many eyes on him as possible which is the last thing a murderer should want?

If you picked anything other than C), congratulations.

Not only do you still have some good faith left for this comic, you're also a better writer than RS. (Not that the last one is a high bar to cross.)

So Apollo wants to frame someone else for his crime. Well luckily for him, there is already an established deity among the cast who doesn't get along with Zeus, has expressed the desire to overthrow him multiple times and is known for having a bad temper as well as having a grudge against hi-

It's Hebe.

He chooses to frame Hebe.

You know, one of the few gods on Olympus who has absolutely no reason to want Zeus dead and gone.

Just... why?

Ares was right fucking there!

If you absolutely needed to frame someone (which, just as a side note, you absolutely didn't) why not choose the war deity who everyone knows gets regularly banished to the Mortal Relam because of how much he doesn't get along with Zeus???

I mean, the best explanation I can think of is that this is supposed to reference how Hebe lost her position as cupbearer of the gods because of Apollo in one version of the myths, but if that is the case... wow, that's an extremely contrived and clumsy way to incorporate that into LO.

So, Persephone's deal with Erebus somehow altered her powers and now she can no longer make plants grow and only causes cold and decay whenever she tries.

And the winter that was essentially Demeter's power play in the original myth is now not only given to Persie but made into a terrible consequence of wanting power for herself. To save everybody she loved, might I add.

So empowering.

So feminist.

And as always when Persie screws up, she does what she does best:

Cry foul and beg someone else to fix it, then throw a tantrum when said someone else actually does try just that.

RS really misses no chance to try and villainize Demeter. Even if Demeter is absolutely, completely, undeniably in the right, she always has to be the eeevil mother-in-law making Hades feel bad.

And that's no different here.

Demeter is right, this is Hades' fault.

If he'd kept his damn mouth shut about the pomegranates or at least elaborated on the price one has to pay to get the Underworld's power, maybe his noveau riche wife wouldn't currently be killing all life in the Mortal Realm.

And the way he doesn't even try to dissuade Persie from "helping" and just watches as she keeps making everything worse because "lulz, I'm not gonna be a controlling husband and stop my wife from killing people".

But hey, this is the same guy who rewarded Persie with sex for breaking and entering and making death threats against a nymph. At least we're keeping it in-character. /s

Oh look, Persie has conveniently passed out from the strain so she won't have to deal with the direct consequences of her actions.

Wonder what kind of deus ex machina will absolve her of all responsibility this time.

#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus

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itsclydebitches · 1 year

Note

>Jaune spends decades protecting the paper people

>team RWBY show up for one (uno) day

>the entire village ends up in flames and everyone is dead

What did they mean by this 🤔

Anyone remember my first recap of the Volume where I prayed that the group won't leave Ever After in ruins like they did Atlas, based on the visuals seen in our opening? 😬

I mean, realistically none of this is their fault. They didn't deliberately drag Neo into the Ever After with them. They didn't force her to have a vendetta against Ruby. They didn't even know Neo was actively after them until the night before. So while it's completely understandable why Jaune would lash out at Ruby in the moment immediately following his village's death, him blaming her for the attack itself is definitely something he's in the wrong about. Though, honestly, I do understand his fury, especially in regards to Ruby not fighting. We as the audience understand that she was panicking due to flashbacks, but all Jaune saw was her standing around and, crucially, his village died due to timing. He didn't get to the stone tower in time because they took so long fighting the Jabberwalkers. Theoretically, if Ruby had fought like she was supposed to - and yes, as a licensed huntress still leading a team made up of her friends, Ruby has a responsibility to defend them/the people as much as she's able - and if she hadn't needed rescuing herself, they might have finished in time to save the Paper Pleasers.

It's a shitty situation all around, one in which, no, Ruby isn't at fault because she's a victim of her PTSD + Neo, but damn, can you blame Jaune for snapping? If I'd protected my paper family for years and then they all died the first day my friends showed up... yikes. The fact that these friends have a) called him crazy, b) called him useless, c) presented the death of his village as unambiguously a good thing (smile, Jaune!), and d) said his relationship with them was "make believe," that all KINDA puts into perspective the sort of friends they're being atm. I mean yeah Jaune is wrong, but also I'm not expecting him to be overly compassionate towards Ruby after all that, especially when she's have a 'What about me?' meltdown while a whole village of people lie dead nearby. What with defending the village, spending years planning for Team RWBY's arrival, offering to shoulder the responsibility of finding a way out, and immediately apologizing to Ruby despite everything above, Jaune comes across as way more compassionate to me this episode.

As a related side-note I've been thinking about a lot this Volume... do the girls really want to be huntresses? Specifically Weiss, Blake, and Yang. I mean, this was already a loaded question back in Volume 2 (that was notably never answered), but Volumes 8-9 in particular really hammer home how uninterested they are in the requirements of the job. They're iffy about taking on duties while living in Atlas. They don't strive to help the city when it's overrun with grimm. They run from a burning village even though they say they don't want to do that any more. Jaune says, 'I need help protecting this village while we look for a way out' and the response is basically, 'Ew, chores?' I MISS the Volume 5 days when they were happily moving from village to village, helping strangers out for the occasional payment or favor; them moving towards their goal (finding Cinder) and keeping the people safe. Nowadays, I feel like the most in-character thing for them to say would be, 'You know what? I'm only a huntress now because we need to stop Salem. After that I'm out. I don't actually like this gig and, you know, the trauma put a damper on things too. I'm going to focus on my company/activism/fun exploration like I'd planned to at the start.'

#rwde #rwby #mymetas

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warrior-cats-rewritten · 9 months

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So major changes to AVOS, please let me know what you think. The seasons are going to be changed as well for Aesthetic.

Main POVs are Sparkpaw/pelt, Violetkit/paw/shine, Twigkit/paw/Skybranch, and later on, Puddleshine. Alderheart has very, very few chapters. Mainly his are only at the beginning of Apprentice's Quest.

Violetkit is put into Windclan with Needletail as Heathertail and Breezepelt's firstborn daughter (Smokehaze and Brindlewing being born with her earlier). I don't know which queen fosters her but I have the feeling it'll be a "unofficial oc". One of the unused names from the Kittypet vote that Wafflepaw one.

Windclan is struggling with their arrogant, selfish leader, but Shadowclan is struggling with their "I never wanted to be here in the first place" leader who refuses to act.

Heathertail mentors Violetpaw, but it is hard for her. She put herself up for ages as an independent cat but now has to watch her father admit that:

A. He wanted to run away from Windclan and become a kittypet

B. He sired a child with a kittypet that he planned to run away with.

C. Then turned his back on them both, tossing them out when Smoke revealed she had been wanting to be in Windclan the whole time, telling them they would never succeed despite Brushclaw being a successful warrior and Windclan being welcoming at the time.

Sparkpelt is only not wanting to help Skyclan because Molewhisker DIED on the way there, and her beloved grandma Sandstorm was murdered by Darktail. She doesn't want to face that trauma again so soon, and people won't stop talking about how Firestar wouldn't do this.

Shadowclan and Windclan both get wrecked, Shadowclan fusing with Riverclan (setting up future tensions) and Windclan merging with Skyclan.

Shadowclan's territory is burnt up badly by Darktail, who now has Windclan's territory as his own.

Violetpaw does not attack Twigpaw, instead she is simply shoved into her, she still feels bad about getting her hurt, even if it wasn't her fault. Needletail helped raise her, but she has complex feelings about this, she doesn't like Needtail's love of violence and Needletail (with Onestar) suggesting the separation.

Ivypool is not a bitch about Dovewing's love-life, instead she does want to go on the patrol, but Bramblestar is the one preventing it. Twigpaw sneaks out anyways with Lionblaze and Fallen Leaves' help (as they were on guard duty), going with Spark and Ivy to find things out. Which oddly lines up with Violetpaw sneaking out as well. The two sisters go it alone, though Sparkpelt fusses over them.

More under the cut!

They see the spirit sign and grieve together. But Violetpaw needs to set things right with everything going on with Needletail. Twigpaw isn't as deterred, and she finds Skyclan.

When Riverclan is attacked, they aren't driven out completely, it is just a display of power, the battle is a stalemate, Mistystar losing a life, and a chunk of Riverclan being taken prisoner.

The Kin are fucking HUGE. They're a big group, enough that the Clans are genuinely having to fight hard for this.

Upon this, Sandstorm's sacrifice, the weaponization of fire, and Violetpaw's misery that she herself inflicted, Needletail realizes this is beyond fucked up. She still gets imprisoned with the starving Riverclan cats though.

Violetpaw's espionage really fucks with her. She is constantly looking over her shoulder. Her relationship with Needletail is strained as hell but Needletail sacrificing herself to save Violetpaw caps it off. It saved her life but it doesn't undo the harm Needletail caused.

In the end, Onestar does die doing the right thing for once. Does he go to Starclan right away? Absolutely not. Prison Sentence for you, boy. But he feels he deserves it and is fine with going. The problem is reflected on the Clans, and while some have the xenophobic knee-jerk reaction to just blame Darktail, a lot of cats realize that the rebellious young cats of the Clans have a point.

Chunks of Kin cats join the Clans, happy to be away from Darktail. Sleekwhisker remains though, swearing that Darktail will live on, his legacy will remain. No one knows what she means by that...

It is deep into Winter and things are TENSE. Food is scarce, and cats are restless. Thunderclan has welcomed in Skyclan, under the pretense that they will find a home eventually.

They're trying, but when the Leader and Second in Command of Thunderclan are at odds, things are split.

Sparkpelt isn't given a 180 to make Alderheart look better. Jayfeather is anti-Skyclan, Cherryfall is anti-Skyclan (mainly because of Mole's death), and some others. It's a sensitive topic (though Berrynose is very much pro Skyclan because if they leave his son died for nothing)

Violetpaw actually gets to break down to her family and cry, because she is not thankful to Windclan for taking her away from her sister, and penalizing her for being different. She tells Harestar otherwise, not wanting to be rude.

Twigpaw says she wants to finish her education first, and continues on a bit in Thunderclan, miserable as she is, she wants to prove to them she is worth something.

Violetpaw is kitty autism, she struggles with social cues and understanding emotions sometimes such as Hawkwing speaking about Pebbleshine making him happy. Twig is also kitty adhd, she is hyper curious all the time, and interrupts others often, which can get on Violet's nerves. But Violet can also be blunt which sets off Twig's RSD.

Twigpaw is named Skybranch after she returns to Thunderclan, the third name Bramblestar has ever confidently given a cat after Lilyheart and Seedfur. She gets it later though, since things in Thunderclan are tenser than a bowstring.

Finpaw still loses his tail, but Violetpaw and the other apprentices are his buddies rather than Twigpaw.

Sparkpelt receives the Prophecy "The Dark Sky must not herald a Storm" after finding Needletail's spirit near the Windclan border during a solo hunt. She tells Alderheart and he stupidly tells the rest of the medicine cats.

All the apprentices want to see Twigpaw, so they all have a secret meeting at the lake where she breaks him out of his shell and he talks about his insecurity about his tail. They bond with these secret meetings and he joins Thunderclan.

Sparkpelt is angry Alderheart went to the Twolegplace when he said they'd go together, he doesn't want attention but NEEDS to be the hero. He gets into a fight with Dandeliontuft and Sparkpelt when they save him because he's insecure.

Ivypool and Tigerheart BOTH go after Dovewing, working together and finally reaching an understanding (Super Edition: Tigerheart's Light)

Snowbush doesn't die, but his leg is amputated.

Violetshine gets together with Tree and Zelda, who stays with the Clans (along with Loki moving to Shadowclan)

Twigpaw is finally given her name, Skybranch, but she doesn't look happy. When pressed during the ceremony, she tells Thunderclan that she has made her choice. She'll always have some love for them, but she loves her sister more. Skybranch leaves for Skyclan with Finleap, and does not come back.

Tree is also a tolly, going by they/he pronouns.

Briarlight doesn't die from the sickness. They immediately move her into Hollyleaf's old Tunnels area, watched over by Hollyleaf and Strawberrytuft (renamed Hollytuft)

Yarrowleaf and Conefoot are found and want to rejoin the Clans instead of Yarrowleaf and Sleekwhisker.

Leafstar is no longer as angry, instead she is visibly stressed out trying to keep everyone happy, and asks the cats of the others Clans "no more shuffling around right now, PLEASE. Skyclan needs more time to settle and find our old clanmates."

Fuzzball actually (completely by accident) gets through to Jayfeather, and when Jay realizes when an ass he's been, he finally changes for the better. Still sarcastic, but less mean spirited, more wanting to actually joke with others. Fuzzball stays in Thunderclan, becoming Fuzzyleaf, a Keeper. He is Jayfeather's mate. His job is to organize and help keep the camp clean.

The Clans like the idea of a Mediator but there is struggle on who to pick for the other Clans.

Sparkpelt and Dandeliontuft are running around playing nurse while this happens, wanting to help their brother out.

More than just Yarrowleaf's kits are taken. I haven't decided who yet, however. But this results in not only Rowanstar's death, but also Conefoot. Died protecting his nephew and niece against their own father, killing Nettle as he drops from blood loss.

More related to Tigerheart's Light, but more Guardian cats come along too.

Blossomfall and Ivypool are mates, their sire is Thrifty, a Loner tom. He looks just like Thriftear! Blossom gives birth just as Dove, Ivy and Tiger get back, the kits slightly overdue, as if they were waiting for their other mom...

Ivypool and Dovewing have a proper goodbye, and there are no hard feelings. None of the shit we got.

When Alderheart visits Velvet in a rare POV for him to bring back her Fishy, he promises that he will come back, that he will visit her. She gives him what is known now as Velvet Thyme and Hattie gets a cameo.

He goes to the Moonpool but the only chat he gets with Starclan is Sandstorm telling him that Thunderclan is in for some troubled times ahead, he just sighs, replying "I know."

Rowanclaw is referred to as Rowanstar in Starclan, out of honour.

Sparkpelt mentors Flypaw, understanding her a lot better and working with her.

Violetshine also takes an alternate path in life, making Sandynose even more of an insufferable prick. She wants to become a Nurse-Maid (permaqueen) and begins her training for that with the other Queens. She is sick of violence.

Sparkpelt is racing with Flypaw to get some energy out when they overhear the medicine cats arguing about the Deathberry Cure.

Dandeliontuft is the one to suggest the cure at all to Alderheart. "Perhaps the deathberries killed the infection, allowing its body to just fight the tiny amount of poison instead."

Flypaw doubts herself heavily, thinking she will never be a Warrior. Sparkpelt gives her encouragement about it, telling her that she will be the most quick-witted Warrior in Thunderclan.

Finleap starts pressuring Skybranch to have kits. He will eventually get shut down, and in the end he leaves back to Thunderclan and will fall into the Imposter's Claws later in life.

Leafstar isn't this oddly aggressive leader, she just wants Skyclan to thrive, and is willing to compromise. Juniperclaw is the antagonistic force here, refusing to agree with Tree's terms. Instead of a random Quick Time Dog Event, Juniperclaw just leaves in a huff. He wants Skyclan GONE.

Violetshine snaps at him for saying Skybranch owes him, telling him that he's an idiot.

Shadowkit has genuine epilepsy, it is treated with valerian but... The outcome looks bleak. This leads into Tawnypelt's Vision. Tigerstar is staying in Thunderclan's camp to keep an eye on Puddleshine, and keeps Shadowkit with him, until Tawnypelt takes him with her to the Tribe to try and heal him, or at least get things under control.

More cats than just Sparrowpelt are poisoned. Cherrytail, Petalnose, and Billystorm all get sick.

Puddleshine POV (he might be the Shadowclan POV after Violet leaves) going to the Moonpool after his recovery, where he gets the sign, but also talks with Conefoot about the Clans needing to work together, a vision of Fivetrees. Ancient words ring. Unite or Die.

Harestar is most giving to Skyclan, though he acknowledges that Wind land isn't really suited for Sky cats hunting style. Bramble neutral leaning to against, that they should go back to the lake. Tigerstar is for them to stay, but Mistystar says it would be best for them to go back. After all, Darktail is gone, why are they still here?

Another Puddle POV (ooh) where he puts together that some deathberries are missing. He smells Juniperclaw's scent on them and FREAKS. He tries to tell Alderheart but the boy feels defeated. He feels like everything was for null.

Sparkpelt finds Tree and Zeldaheart, who miss Violetshine terribly since Skyclan has left. Sparkpelt swallows her nerve and, after sending Flypaw back to camp, she will track down Skyclan. The TRUE Spark That Remains.

Meanwhile, Dandeliontuft and Alderheart both go over to Shadowclan's territory carrying herbs, pretending to want to give some extras over as goodwill and check Puddleshine and Shadowkit over.

Upon the realization that Juniperclaw poisoned Skyclan to make them leave, he is not only stripped of deputyship. He is exiled.

Sparkpelt argues with Bramblestar about going after them, calling him out on ignoring their plea when he was the one who made the "All Clans Stick Together" LAW IN THE FIRST PLACE, learning that Skyclan was poisoned... She decides to do it her own way. Spark steals a few traveling herbs, Larksong comes with her, and they go off after Skyclan together with Tree and Zeldaheart.

While on the journey, the rain makes it hard to even see, the cats staying near each other, shoulder to shoulder, nose to tail. Everyone is terrified.

Leafstar loses a life drowning before Ebonyclaw can get her out of the water.

Skybranch finally cuts Finleap off. Enough is enough. She doesn't want kittens, ever.

When they get back, the Clans are in full panic mode, remembering the Great Storm and also the fact that a little kid is missing.

Violetshine dives into the water to save Shadowkit but gets swept further through the rushing water. Juniperclaw manages to save them, but he stares at the Shadowclan cats, the cats he tried to kill off...

"I'll never be able to say it enough, but Skyclan... I'm sorry."

It isn't a redemption. It's him paying with his life to tell these cats he is sorry, that his threat is no more.

Skyclan settles into their space, the Clans all expanding outwards further. Sparkpelt sees Firestar's suddenly next to her sitting calmly, watching with pride. Time seems to stop for a moment.

"The 5 Clans need to face threats together. You united them once more. Sparkpelt, I'm so proud to be part of your family."

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kezzywrites · 1 year

Text

I am so totally in love with her.

Steve had been acting strange for approximately two weeks and four days. Or at least that's when you had first noticed it. He’d gone from hardly ever being apart from you unless he was chauffeuring Dustin around, or at work with Robin, to avoiding you at all costs.

Although to be fair to you, it wasn't your fault. The only reason he was totally blanking you is because three weeks ago he was hit square in the face by a realisation that Robin had been waiting for him to come to for the last two years.

THE REALISATION.

Steve stared as you walked out of Family Video, head resting on the palm of his hand.

“You are so totally in love with her.” Robin said, smirking at Steve from where she was restocking the shelves to his left.

“I so totally am not.” he said back, a small pout forming on his lips.

“You so are! I can’t believe you don't see it. You spend practically all your time with her, you always hold her favourite movies when they come in, and i'm 98% sure if she asked you to run into a flaming building to grab a sweater for her you would do it.”

“I so would no-”

“Yes you would! Example A, when her car broke down in that blizzard last year and she called you because she didn't know the number for the garage and you drove all the way across Hawkins to come pick her up even though there was a weather warning for the whole of Indiana and the news weather guys told people not to drive! Example B, the time that she got stood up on a date and she didn't tell you because she didn't want you to do anything stupid but when you found out from me, you bought her all her favourite snacks, rented FIVE of her favourite movies and didn't leave until she felt better about herself. Example C, when she got that date in the first place you totally grilled her about him and then sulked to yourself when he sounded like a decent person! And I know this is awful to say but I'm kinda glad you were right about not liking him because I don't think I could have dealt with listening to you complain about another guy she dates. Now are three examples enough for you to admit that you’re in love with her or do I need to carry on.”

A beat passed.

“I am so totally in love with her.”

NOW.

The party had arranged a movie night and to put it lightly you weren't looking forward to it, you were obviously going to go because you couldn't let the kids down but having to sit next to Steve for a few hours in awkward silence? No thank you!

You weren't exactly sure what you did that Steve gave you the cold shoulder for but it was kind of getting to you. The two of you had become friends after the first annoyance of saving the world together, to people in the wrong place in the wrong time, you dropping something off at the Byers house for Joyce after hearing about Will, courtesy of your mother, and Steve trying apologise to Johnathan after the fight they had. It was after that that you and Steve became practically inseparable, joined at the hip. You did almost everything together and you think it's because at the time of your meeting you both felt this void of loneliness but when you were together, it seemed to dissipate.

It only took a month and a half after his break up with Nancy to realise that the feelings you had towards the boy were not completely platonic. There was no ‘Oh you’re falling in love with him’ moment it was more of an ‘Oh you’re already in love with him but you’re going to completely ignore it, push it down, and pray to whatever god is up there that it goes away because he's your best friend and you don't want to lose him’ kind of moment. So that’s what you’d done, you'd shoved down your feelings and got on with being friends, up until almost three weeks ago. You’d gone into family video to rent ‘The Breakfast Club’ for what felt like the hundredth time and as you had been talking to Steve, he had been short with you, treating you like he didn't know you at all, so you'd left, watched the movie, and when you came to return it, the second he saw you walk through the doors, he’d called for Robin and taken his break. It confused and upset you. Your next few interactions had gone the same way; he had dropped Dustin off at your place because he wanted some help on an English presentation that he wasn't too fond of doing and Steve hadn't even gotten out of the car to say hello. That was when you'd given up trying and that was how you ended up not really seeing each other until tonight.

You were having the movie night at Steve's place because he had the biggest TV and the most room so it made sense, but that also meant you had to deal with the awkwardness of not knowing what to do with yourself again, just like you did the first time you were at his house; perching on the edge of sofas, waiting for him to offer drinks instead of getting yourself them and the conversations you used to have that couldn't have lasted more than 10 words.

You knocked on the door and waited patiently until you saw a flash of hair that most definitely wasn't Steves.

“Hi! Do you have the snacks?” Dustin said as he almost flung the door of its hinges.

You had been assigned the role of bringing the junk food for the seven thousand four hundred and six children the seven of you adults shared.

“Yeah, I should have brought enough shit, I-I dont know you'll need to check but don't expect me to run and get more if there isn't, im sure youll survive with one less bag of chips.”

Dustin grabbed the plastic bag full of snacks with a grin and led you inside. The familiar house made you feel on edge, you'd not stepped foot in it for over a month and filled you with dread knowing what came next. Steve. He sat on his sofa, in conversation? Argument? With Eddie. To their right sat Nancy and Robin, on two comfy chairs, they smiled at you as Dustin dragged you further in the house. On the floor in the corridor you saw Jonathan and Argyle, the two of them had been high pretty much since they got back from california and you could smell the weed on them from feet away.

You made your way into the kitchen as Dustin poured the snacks out of the bag, you heard the door click behind you. You turned around to see Robin with a small smile on her face.

“Hey, how are you? I feel like I haven't seen you in literal ages!” she reached forward to give you a hug, which you gladly returned.

“Yeah, Steve and I haven't really been speaking lately and I'm not sure why, I don't know if it was something I said, or something I did or even something I didn't do but he's avoiding me like the plague” You watched as Robin's face dropped while you were talking.

“Oh you have got to be shitting me! I totally cannot believe him!” She started to head out of the room, undoubtedly to go and hopefully knock some sense into him but right before she hit the door she turned back, looked at Dustin and told him to scram. She then looked back at you and said “I swear by the end of tonight you’ll be talking again he just needs to get his head out of his ass”

“Wha-”

But before you could ask any questions she was out of the door.

You made your way into the living room and sat down on the end of the sofa, next to Max. She looked up at you with her eyes that were a little bigger courtesy of her glasses and smiled which you returned and gave her a shoulder hug. You were going to ask her how she was and about her day but Steve already had the remote in his hands and all the kids were sitting on the floor ready and excited.

You all silenced as the opening credits of The Labyrinth started playing and everyone made themselves comfortable.

It got to maybe twenty minutes in the movie when Steve whispered to you all that he was getting a drink and he'd be right back. You shot a glance at Robin and she was very ardently giving you hand gestures, shooing you to follow him. So you did. Because quite frankly you were sick of being ignored by someone you were so close too.

You step into the kitchen quietly behind Steve and watch him pull a glass out of the cabinet above him. You watch him fill it with water from the fridge and as he turns around you see him jump when he sees you.

“Christ you scared the shit out of me”

“Have I done something wrong?” You ask

You watch as his face morphs into one of confusion

“Wha- No! Why would you think that?”

“Oh I don't know, maybe the fact that you've ignored me for three weeks, we went from talking everyday to not talking at all steve. Why?”

“I- um well-” he stuttered, he had a nervous look on his face, almost as if he'd been caught.

“I just don't understand” you say with frustration, “Is it something I did? Or something I said? Or even something I didn't do just tell me so I can fix it! It's been killing me! I just don't understand why you've been avoi-”

“I'm in love with you.” he blurts out. You watch his features go from panic to relief to panic again.

You pause and look up at him. You can feel your stomach twist.

“That's not funny Steven.”

“Wasn't supposed to be.”

“So you've been avoiding me because you love me?”

“Yep” he nodded

“And you didn't want to tell me?”

“Yep”

“You are so fucking stupid.”

“Ye- No! Wait hold on, I'm not stupid I thought I was doing the right thing! I thought if I ignored you it would go away and we could be friends again” he spoke, flailing his hands around.

You stared up at him as he continued his rant about how he didnt want to sacrifice his friendship with you because he was completely sure you didn't feel the same way and you were just getting more and more frustrated by the second so you did what anyone would do.

You grabbed his face and kissed him.

You felt him tense as his words got pressed against your lips and then relax as he grabbed your waist. His mouth slid against your own with passion as you shoved your hands in his hair and tugged gently. He groaned against your mouth and you could feel him smile against your lips. You pulled away for air and he chased you a little, only opening his eyes when he couldn't feel you where you were before.

“I told you you were really fucking stupid”

He gave you a breathless laugh, his nose pressing against yours.

“Yeah, maybe i am”

You both giggled as he pecked your lips again.

“You know I love you too right?”

He grinned.

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington #stranger things #stranger things fic #steve harrington fic #steve harrington x you #steve x you #steve x reader #steve harrington x y/n #stranger things x you #stranger things fanfiction #steve harrington imagine #st4 #steve harrington fluff #steve x y/n #steve fluff #eddie munson #robin buckley

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moe-broey · 9 months

Text

OKAY. I. FINALLY HAVE DONE IT. IT TOOK A LOT OF TESTING AND TROUBLE SHOOTING AND FIGURING OUT BUT I THINK I HAVE IT

My Askr and Co. team!!!!!!! Sometimes I switch one of them out for story stuff (full immersion lmfao), but!!! It's them it's the OGs 🥺🥺🥺

Alfonse is still pretty much the same, but since the Dragon Flower limit was increased, I feel he no longer needs Fury! Which, removing it does synergize better with Florid Cane anyway, beyond the Canto gimmick (having an Atk/Spd bonus if kept healthy).

Biggest thing I needed to figure out though was who I was giving the special skills to (from an extra Acsended Mareeta and Felix). I WAS tempted to give them to Alfonse (head empty he means everything to me) but I came to the conclusion that Ruptured Sky works too well on him. I even think it's fun from a storytelling standpoint, where he's consistent almost to a fault -- can result in him being reliable, or juuust missing the mark (he's still adaptable as well though!). PLUS! Both are speed based skills, and even With my speedy Alfonse build, AND even with all those Dragon Flowers, Sharena outspeeds him at lower investment.

So it did come down to trying to decide which would work best between Sharena and Anna.

Sharena absolutely needed to be completely revised, since I realized I accidentally doubled up on Null Follow Up on her weapon and B slot (and her C slot was a wimpy Threaten skill lmfao). Ultimately I felt Felix's kit synergized better with Alfred's Arcane I gave to her -- espp Bulwark keeping her healthy! In this way I think I accidentally made her a tank. Especially with all the stat bonuses coming together, on top of a damage reduction special. Really my ONLY bit of grief here is she no longer has her special attack voicelines........... I'm SO sad about that 💔💔💔 (HOWEVER. IT. IS REALLY FUNNY.)

She's just standing there..... Menacingly........... (quite literally with the Menace skill too from the Summer Dimitri manual that's up for grabs. I'm not so sure if it Suits Her storytelling-wise but tbh it's funny. GO GIRL START KILLING‼️‼️‼️)

As for Anna! I actually haven't touched Anna's build in years, she's not a unit I ever use outside of the once a month free orb and sometimes for story... last I left her was with Life or Death 3, Vantage, and a Spur skill. I wanted to keep in line with this initial build though... bc I feel like it suits her.

Outside of this one time (very early on, before I really put a lot of thought into things) I Never use Life or Death (I'm too cautious HAHAH) so I was comfortable giving her a Life or Death 4 I had laying around. BEYOND THAT. IT WAS. SUCH A NIGHTMARE. To figure out What the rest of her kit should be. A Lot of trial and error, testing, troubleshooting, everything. Because the BIGGEST THING is I wanted to keep Nóatún on her. She gets INSANE movement from it, and I felt like if I could Just Get This Right, I could pull off something as gimmicky as my Hit and Run Canto Alfonse. You have to trade SO much power for that movement, and she's already made of glass and paper the way I'm building her (but I am SO committed to this idea bc it's EXACTLY how I conceptualize her character in my mind -- strong starter, hard hitter, high movement = speedy and lots of experience on the battle field!! And SOMETHING in her C and Seal slots to communicate teamwork and commanding.)

EVENTUALLY. WHAT I THINK WORKS. Spurn helps her Not Die As Much/As Quickly (thank you damage reduction), and I think the balance between Oath/Solo skills gets the idea across.

BUT ALSO. THIS. THE MOST FUCKED UP THING I DESPERATELY WANTED TO SHOW OFF IT'S SO FUCKING GOOD!!!!!!!!!

LOOK at this. LOOK at how STUPID this is. How by giving Alfonse Odd Tempest HE IS. SO POWERFUL. HE MAKES A KILLER OPENING (EXACTLY AS HE ALWAYS SAYS HE WILL‼️‼️‼️). Reposition into Canto into look at him fucking go. He's fucking gone. Halfway across the battlefield. AND ANNA HAS FANTASTIC SYNERGY WITH THIS!!!!! Being able to get That One Extra Space thanks to Nóatún!!!!!!!! (Unfortunately this was a terrible matchup and she died instantly, but this is more for demonstration purposes 🫡)

I am a little sad that Sharena gets left on the back lines when this works out but. I think she's still doing her part. Esp since I'm testing out Ardent Sacrifice on her, where I typically exclusively only use Reposition and always have a healer. On top of eating hits, she also covers for her allies as well! Making sure they're okay :)

Finally! Takumi! I. Have no idea how he fits in here tbh I don't even know how Pathfinder works. But I love him so much so dearly and he's here because he's a highly respected veteran member of the Order of Heroes. Also everyone say thank you Alcryst for fucking finally giving him a usable weapon and decent skills (I have gone through SO MANY ideations of base Takumi builds and they have NEVER been on the level of stronger units he was ALWAYS WOEFULLY OUTCLASSED. Which is DEVASTATING bc I really like using base forms sometimes!!!!). I'm SO happy he's finally on par w stronger units now!!!! OH. AND. THE MAJOR THING ABOUT HIM ACTUALLY. Is once he gets the ball rolling he is procing Deadeye every fucking turn. Just like in Fates... 🥺🥺🥺 (killing and maiming and violence complete with a cheeky attitude and bravado!)

#fire emblem #feh #this. was actually so much fun though esp w anna. building a unit based off of how they are as a character #like it's fairly typical for newer units to come like this! DIYing it was so fun though!#plus i also think alfonse's skills suit him. maybe. if you squint.#idk him and sharena are up for interpretation when it comes to the storytelling here HAHAHAHA #any which way i set them to be my defense team. so maybe if anyone encounters me in arena #i can jumpscare them HAHAHAHAHA #I DO LOVE ARENA PLAYERS WHO ARE LIKE THAT. the ones that make you do a double take.#shoutouts to that one guy who had all azamas. all wearing def accessories. they weren't even fully leveled i don't think.#just sheer commitment to the bit.#fe alfonse #sharena #fe anna #fe takumi #my builds

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straycalamities · 9 months

Note

Your post made me curious about Julien.... Would love to hear about him and Andrews relationship

hmm...the conundrum with that is i would like to show it one day so how much to tell...

the thing abt this is julian has ALWAYS been written in andrews life. one of the constants of his story no matter how much he changes. (he used to be named Matty) but ive uh...been a chicken to properly show it because uh its HEAVY.

so hm...i've gone over andrew's family life before so it's not meh to go over it again i think...

that's also mostly stayed the same.

readmore bc...ya boys gonna get long-winded

so andrew has a very strict mother with very high expectations of her children, but especially him. his father is more lax and easy-going, pretty carefree tbh, but bc of this its to a fault where he also just..doesnt want to confront his wife. so things kinda..go out of control in the household as far as...his mom's weird like..competition thing between andrew and his sister

so andrew has a twin sister Alana (anyone remember Jackie? yea) and she's pretty naturally good at whatever she puts her mind to. not that she doesnt bust her ass, but things just? come to her. it's just how it is. and she's very much a daddy's girl which pushes andrew into the role of momma's boy. so then it becomes andrew's dad and alana vs andrew's mom and andrew. except. it's pretty much only andrew's mom pushing this narrative, but she's a very convincing person and is the kinda person to naturally command a room

alana is also a naturally curious person so she likes to pick up hobbies and things and practice them until she's over it or good at it or both. and thus..andrew gets pushed into these things too, to not be outdone

the thing about andrew, though, is that he's got a more particular way that he needs to engage with things to actually pick things up and learn them. first of all, he's a very kinetic learner so just reading or hearing a lecture about it doesn't do anything for him. and unfortunately he doesn't have anyone in his life early on (teachers nor family) who understand this about him. they just think there's something wrong with him or off about him or that he's lazy/doesn't care.

but andrew cares. oh he cares. way too much. and he works. so hard. to try to match with the expectations weighing on him, but it just! doesn't happen! no matter how hard he tries! he can't absorb what he's reading! he can't process what he's hearing! when he DOES get the chance to just get his hands on things and figure things out, he shines

and alana tries to help because despite it all, she cares a lot about him. she tries to show him things or tell him what helped her, but it's just..different. the things that work for her, dont't work for him. and she also can't be with him a lot because she has a lot going on. she has big aspirations and she has lots of friends (more things he struggles with) how did they end up so different u_u

so andrew's daily life is very very stressful. he feels like he's always under watch, under scrutiny, every little thing is being judged, weighed, and measured. and that just makes everything much harder for him. he eventually learns over-time to perform great under pressure but that's because the pressure in his adult-life is nothing like the pressure of his childhood lmao

(and if this is a universe where he's got the necromancy thing goin on, there's THAT whole can of worms too. bc of how looked down on and oo scary necromancy is)

so its like..andrew does have his aspirations, his dreams. he wants to be an astronaut! :) and he maintains some semblance of that goal his whole life. he just likes space! he thinks its neat and would rather just spend all day learning about space than anything he's supposed to be learning. not that it's easier, but he's more motivated lmao

he's a C or low B student (idk how to translate american schooling marks into anything else sorry..american moment) and so he's not doing...too bad, but definitely not enough to his teachers or his parents. and he's "inconsistent" bc go figure sometimes lessons are more to his learning capabilities and he excels so oh no now ppl have Proof He Can Do It why cant he do it All The Time. fantastic.

being so focused on making everyone proud or proving everyone wrong in other cases (yes andrew does operate on a level of spite) has andrew finding little time for himself. especially bc his moms the type to not like uhh idle activities. everythings gotta have a Point of Growth. literally the only reprieve is that his mom works away from home a lot, but she'll definitely call or video-call often to make up for that fact. and andrew's The One she has her eye on. he's Her responsibility to better

(the thing about his mom is god she's a strict hard-ass but she does love him uh...so i'm not trying to make it all Ooo Evil Heartless Mother Time. nah she cares but boy is she awful at showing it. and that's not an excuse but..yaknow. it is how it is. her whole thing abt being such a tyrant is that she's worried about him and wants him to do better and Be better and so she's gonna force it down his throat til it takes ...rip)

ofc his family all has their bonding pleasant moments its not all hell all the time and like i said his dad and sister are more uh..better at showing they care but still not..amazing. the whole household like i said before in another post is more reserved than like..ji-hoon's for example who freely give hugs and stuff

anyways so alll of this uh..stuff is to explain: Andrew Doesn't Have Friends LMAO his entire elementary school experience is spent not having time for friends and eventually just not knowing how to Make them bc he had no practice or experience doing so. and the other kids don't think much about him because he doesn't make time for them? they've got other ppl to hang out with. and when a kid does make an attempt he fucks it up somehow or his mom scares them off with the Restrictions for how andrew is allowed to interact with other kids (if andrew wouldnt tell them tho they wouldnt have to know..smh)

by the time he's transitioning to middle school is when he meets julian. julian ALSO does not have friends (gee wonder why (youll see why)) and julian sees andrew not having friends either and thinks well! time to have this loner be MY friend. and julian is a pretty charismatic person when he wants to be. he knows how to small talk and keep conversations going and all that. i say this like a tween julian already has evil intentions but tbh..nah it DOES honestly start off innocent enough. julian has a lot going on at home too and wants someone to be his friend. simple as that. andrew doesnt already have a group, so..easy choice there. should be

the stuff that usually scares ppl away doesnt work on julian because he's a very anti-rules disobedient sort at this point already anyways. he just sees it as a challenge really so even if andrew makes things awkward by parroting his moms rules on how he can interact with other kids based on her paranoias about the typical Child and what they could teach Her Precious Baby it doesnt phase him. he gonna do it anyway

they do have interests in common, turns out! they like some of the same music. some of the same shows/movies. and things like that. the rest of it Becomes shared interests bc julians the type to go "hey i like this. now you will too" and for the most part? their shared tastes go a long way and andrew DOES end up liking most things julian introduces him to

at first julian does kinda..have no choice but to follow the Hard Rules that andrews got for hanging out so..they pretty much only see each other at school, they start picking up writing letters for each other to read only when they get home so they can write a reply and they get kinda lengthy as more topics get added lol

but eventually julian starts convincing andrew to like..shake things up a bit. asks where he lives. turns up at his window. just to chaaat ofc. theyre not gonna get in trouble psh.. its just talking. then it becomes andrew calling julian at home even tho he's not allowed to be on the phone, but if he does it at night then nobody can catch him (or if his moms away bc tbh does his dad rly care..? but andrew assumes he does)

and so julian and andrew get steadily closer and closer that way and andrew is. ecstatic. his first friend! and a really close one! they're best friends! and for julians credit, he's still just thinking "yay i have a friend. someone that makes life suck less :) even if he's a dweeb who i need to teach to live life"

and okay well anything further about them needs content warnings: very unhealthy, toxic relationship talk. manipulation

so unfortunately. julian has a very uhh extreme view on his life. he likes to exaggerate everything (usually for the worst) and jus tlike in general. not just describing it, he actually feels like his life is the worst life anyone could ever have. his parents split up when he was young and now he's being raised by his grandma who is also strict but in a way where its like..shes strict on him but lives kinda like..whatever, herself. shes very do as i say not as i do but julian hangs onto the Example she's putting off and hates her guts for having the Audacity to try to make him do different when she cant even do it herself. he also has an uncle who has his fingers in a lot of very shady pots and so julian is keen to things he rly shouldnt be at a young age

so with all that, he has a tendency to kinda lash out at the world around him. thats sorta his...uh version of coping. and with so many ppl putting him at arms length mostly because of THIS part of his behavior especially, he's only got one person at his side. loyal. always there for him.

unfortunately thats andrew

and it starts small like..playful insults. nothing rly anything at first it could just be the way he shows affection. but then the insults hit parts that sting deeper and deeper. and get more and more personal. and julian starts making almost memes? of some of andrews faults, weaknesses, and insecurities as if that's just one of their Inside Jokes they have, yknow, as best pals. so andrew feels like oh well i have to like this bc its Special and its just for me. i should appreciate that he's doing this. nobody else has this. and he's not being Mean he's just being playful

and unfortunately the more andrew lets him get away with it, the worse julian gets about it. the thing is that nobody's taught andrew self-worth yet. he's been too busy trying to be what other people want him to be. so here he is, also being what julian wants him to be: a punching bag. but he doesnt realize thats what it is. he just thinks julian wants andrew to be the type to be "playfully rude" with but, again, im saying julian goes way past that

and as julian gets older, the more he reserves what used to be how he was with everyone, being him, being genuine in all the worst and best ways, with only andrew. so everyone else gets this very like..agreeable neutral kinda personality out of julian. so then andrew also sees THAT and thinks wow..i really am special

and as years go by and they go from middle school to high school and social situations change around them, andrew feels even more lucky he's gotten somebody special to him and that he's special to because by highschool it feels like everyones already got their cliques and their partners-in-crime and he'd feel like a mega loser without julian. and julians shown him and taught him so many cool things that give him things to actually talk about with other ppl when they Engage with him?

but yeah throughout highschool julian teaches andrew more and more rulebreaking habits. they even set up ways to make money at school w stuff like..selling test answers or snacks or stuff when they can get away with it. or skipping classes or other things. vandalizing things. pranking ppl (harmless :) ofc..but maybe only physically so)

so we return to julian's uncle. liek i said he's a shady dude. well. he starts involving an older julian in his shady shit. so now julian and andrew are peddling fkn weed and prescription drugs around their school and neighborhood. eventually they're hotwiring vehicles to steal. (kinda uhh tragically this is actually where andrew figures out he's pretty good at cars and likes them a lot and even if he's having a constant crisis about Being Awful, he's also uhhh more motivated to learn how to do a new thing and Be Good At It. bc that's the thing isnt it? he's finally Good At Something) and stealing other things too

and i kinda quickened the pace here but its like..well it does escalate pretty quickly because at some point julian has andrew wrapped around his little finger and tho there are the times one or both of them get caught and andrew gets in trouble, has a crisis, and swears off doing anything like that ever again!! julian just has to warm andrew up to it again. because by highschool julian also has the upper hand in that he's become andrew's gay awakening. so now andrew has a huge crush on him and especially wants to impress him and keep him around and notice him and find him cool and worthwhile

and at first julian is sorta confused?? but diversity win! the manipulative toxic asshole best friend is also into boys! but giving andrew everything he wants wouldnt be very fun would it? he has something to dangle over his head. and he's gotten to the point where this is high risk shit. andrew could very much change his mind about everything about them and leave julian and the longer time goes on, the more paranoid julian becomes of this very thing happening. so he holds onto whatever leashes he can get twisted around andrew

he'll entertain his attraction but never clarifies anything. never gives him like..bold affection. never makes it clear how he feels or if he's even completely fine with it? which adds pressure onto andrew that he's just making all this up. or he's being the weirdo, pushing something on julian who might be straight or something

outside of julian tho, andrew's family is noticing his behavior bc i mean..also hes obviously getting caught doing some of this stuff. and his grades are even worse. and sometimes they get calls abt him missing school? and they try to intervene bc like..andrews got One friend. its gotta be this guy. so they try to ground andrew, ban julian, all kinds of stuff but they're slippery and they've got all sorts of workarounds. and ultimately, they still go to the same school. and..sadly. this, at first, just makes andrew desperate to keep julian all the more bc now he's beome this like..symbol of freedom and having Fun and living life to the fullest and anything related to home starts being associated with prison, suffocation, snuffing out his personality and everything he's learned about himself and like..even if he doesnt rly has Friends outside of julian (he's convinced julian is the only friend he rly wants/needs) he's still seen as cool! the Bad Boy, the Hookup for cool shit (snacks, drugs etc) he's a hit sometimes with the Le Popular Kids ooo... and he might even get invited to get-togethers with julian (julian is actually the introvert to andrews extravert but he Humors ppl for the image and he likes the way andrew always looks at him like a lost puppy when he's trying to figure out what to say in convos with other ppl)

but overtime, julians just gotten too comfortable with being too rough with andrews mentality and his emotions. bc he's never stopped his absolute drilling into andrews squishy parts in order to make himself feel better. or somehow blaming andrew for everything, even julians own shortcomings. and playing hot n cold with andrews emotions and etc. like there's just a lot he does that keeps andrew eternally unsure of where he's standing with julian or if he's doing things Correct or in a way that makes julian Happy. and as andrew gets older and starts Understanding things, he starts Understanding that hey...there's actually a lot about this that he doesnt like. he starts trying to...ask julian to lighten up. to consider his feelings on things. that he wants to do..things he wants to do? why do they always do things julian wants to do. why do they always get into what julian likes but never what andrew likes.

julian is...surprised and he does not Like this change. doesnt like that andrew is trying to cause problems? in their relationship? like why make this a thing? when its nothing? it was fine before? but the thing about letting andrew meet ppl, gain reasons for ppl to wanna talk to him and know him is that he gets to know how other ppl are and how they feel abt him. and though he hasnt made any other Friends, he's just learning how..Normal ppl are. and how julian with him is Not Normal. and its in a bad way bc andrew feels bad! he feels sick to his stomach sometimes. and nobody gets to him like julian does! and he thought before it was the crush but now he's starting to realize...he doesnt actually feel that way about julian anymore because he's just gotten so...Cruel

well now when andrew gets grounded/banned from julian, he doesn't fight it. he doesn't find the loopholes anymore. he lets things go and just kinda...tries to see how he feels? and he finds he...feels better. there's ways he feels worse, but there's a lot more ways he feels like he can breathe. like he's a person. and he likes it so...he starts to just ween himself off julian. and julian starts to act up more bc he doesnt have his usual ways to Cope and gets in trouble more, being at school Less and that just causes more distance

and julian is finally living with what he was most terrified of. and andrew is willingly? throwing him away? and he cant have that. he's at his wits end and panicking

new content warning: whew boy suicide mention/suicide-baiting

and thats all i rly have to say aint it

he holds the fact over his head that if andrew actually does officially cut ties with him, julian will kill himself. that he has no reason to live if he doesn't have andrew. that andrew is his everything and the light of his life, his joy, all that. and he cant't just? leave him like this?

and at first andrews like wait no this is awful dont do that..im sorry and like..tentatively keeps his ties to julian, tries to continue things the wya they were! just uh..different! bc if julian wants andrew to stay then..compromises have to happen okay? and julian says he agrees but catch things getting worse again and andrew in the same boat he was before

distancing

julian freaking out in a panic at 2am on a phone call describing what he's about to do til andrew apologizes again

rinse

repeat

but andrew eventually is just...tired. man. he's getting closer to graduating. he really does NOT need this. it's taking such a heavy toll on him bc rly! nothing else terrible in his life ever really went away, this is just an addition. it's not that his mom saw him acting out and thought oh...this is bc im too hard on him, nah, she stays hard. she gets Harder. his moms stern and affectionless and doesnt understand his plights, his sisters always so busy with her life, and his dad is out of touch. and mostly: andrew doesnt want to bother anyone with his problems. its his own fault, after all. its his mess. and he also is terrified of what anyone would think of even..half the things he'd have to admit to get them to understand. or even a fourth tbh

so one day he just..has had enough. julian threatens to tell his parents what he's done, what he's really like even if it brings julian down too. julian plans to be dead anyways after so what does it matter

and andrew just tells him to do it and hangs up

he feels sick to his stomach for days, but also is too fed up to call and apologize or take it back. he flip-flops on both so much he ends up doing nothing at all

and this is where julian is officially out of his life. i call it Schrodinger's Julian at this point bc did he? or didnt he? well what is the truth is he just does not show up again. so andrew is free but..he literally does not know at what cost. and the guilt eats him up alive for the rest of his life as well as all the damage literally going from like 12-13 to 18 with what this shit did to him

(cw: suicide stuff over)

this is where some of the stories diverge? umm..he either goes immediately to college or waits. with the college timeline Also diverging to oh he makes it somehow or oh he has to drop out

my default tho is that he does try, but he has to drop out. and makes an absolute mess of himself while he's trying. college parties and nightlife and everything else. sex drugs and rock n roll pretty much. everything he knows about connecting to other people is completely Fucked and so he thinks he's making connections but it's not real. and nothing feels like it did with julian but that should be a good thing? or should it. he misses the old julian and he misses the good parts and he feels like he'll never have that with someone again or that maybe...if he did...they'd do the same thing. maybe its dangerous to be that close to anyone. but oh he wants it. so bad.

and we'll continue with my usual story but uh (cw: drugs/drug-use)

we have to delve a bit into the fact he becomes an addict. because he very much does. with all the escapism he does in college because he's just trucking along without processing a drop of this? no therapy? not even someone to vent to or hold onto? nah man. shits rough. and he loses himself in many kinds of drugs but heroin is his Drug of Choice and also loses himself in other people but in shallow ways. he becomes a party animal but in the worst way and that becomes his "college" is just this whole social scene that he's not even engaging with in a meaningful way bc he's too terrified of earnest closeness with another human being

meanwhile his grades tank and he just...stops going. needless to say he becomes very much a disaster of a human being at the end of this. the thing is tho..its all self-internalized. he doesnt take it out on other ppl or even want to make it other ppls problems. he tries to just come off as this rly fun guy whos up for literally anything. and like yeah ppl who hang w him enough can definitely See Somethings Up but he's literally just like oh its nothing! its fine im fine! bc no if he opens up about anything everyones gonna hate and abandon him

and unfortunately this gets back to his mom and she uh...cuts him off. completely. if he wont get cleaned up. if he wont just...BE better jst DONT be this trainwreck of a son or else. dont associate with her. thinking maybe itd be a shock enough he'd just Get Better? (lmao) but lmao no. and he rly spirals bad after that but luckily his dad and his sister still sneak contact with him, doing what they can? with someone who doesnt wanna make anything anyone elses' problem and insists he's fine everythings. Fine.

what Does finally have him like?? find hope again? and cling to it and start to eventually put his life back on its feet again depends on the story im writing but something eventually always does and he always has the same Sponsor to help him :'3 darius...(his old roommate from when he was a teacher at thornville..remember that guy? yea rewrote him into here in a different way) and idk..things do look up for andrew! it's just...a very much uphill battle and that's kinda usually where i place him in like Current Events in whatever sceneario/story im thinking of is after he's gotten on his feet (shakily but he's there) and he's usually a mechanic (sometimes moonlights as a necromancer for hire as well) and he's Working himself up to trying college again but hes taking his time. and he's got some sort of support circle (darius, ji-hoon, and sometimes others)

ji-hoon he actually meets as one of his roommates in college and it takes a lot of Effort from ji-hoon but he sees andrew struggling and kinda nags his way into his life to help and is usually one of the reasons andrew gets inspired to get better bc ji-hoon is literally everything julian wasnt but like in a good way. he cares, unconditionally about ppl in general but especially andrew because idk they just Click right. and like i said in another post, ji-hoon's family basically adopts andrew as well and they're so affectionate and loving and give lots of affirmations and stuff and andrew probably cries bc he's never felt that much love tbh and then feels like shit abt it bc crying is dumb, but then everyone else cries too (happy tears) and its like oh

idk this is where i start having lot sof tangential thoughts so ill leave it here but uh! yeah! so that's the story of julian and andrew! and the damage it did! and yes! this is true in every iteration of andrew ive ever written! (the julian and childhood family stuff part, not necessarily all the rest that comes after, a lot of that's new)

#asks #sharcbait #andrew cho #giant fucking ass-long lore post ig #bless your fucking SOUL if you read it all im your biggest fan #basically andrew's entire story pretty much i guess #oops just kinda typed it up in an ask #sighs one day ill write it/draw it proper

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