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#jk its gonna be so funny if everyones hates this
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DIGITAL BLACK - Synthwave Cover by Bennie
my partner @bennie4twenny has been cooking up another King Gizzard cover, this time completely different and ELECTRONIC!!! vocals by me, everything else (synths, drums, production, video editing etc) by her.
warning: you may find your favourite robot to be somewhat... different 😳
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awrkive · 7 months
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[DRABBLE] COLD NIGHTS & BLURRED LINES (m) — JJK.
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you were used to jungkook making the first move every single time but this particular night, you couldn't help but change things up a little bit.
PAIRING jungkook x (fem) reader
GENRE r18+ (minors dni pls)
WORD COUNT 4.1k (this is def not a drabble anymore but its like 70% smut anyway saur 🤷🏼‍♀️)
WARNINGS/MISC jk in grey tracksuit 😢 oc is not a procrastinator everybody booed. kinda domestic vibes everyone wants to have what they have including ms delusional me !! this is my literally me fic kinda (this is literally just oc thirsting over jungkook OEBDIDHSJEB) also imagine 3D jungkook guys.... 🙏🏼 smut warnings: oral s*x (m&f receiving, 69 position), penetrative s*x, multiple positions, overst*mulation, creampies, unprotected s*x (dont fls 🙏🏼)
NOTES heyyy so i reread cnbl last night and scrolled thru unanswered messages on my inbox and found these 2 (amongst many IEBDIDHSHD) drabble reqs for cnbl and decided to write it bcs i love and miss them!! unfortunately i lost my ao3 password and i have nowhere to post this so whatever im gonna start posting here again LMFAOOOO. anyway, i hope u guys enjoy this 💗 this is most esp dedicated to the second anon i hate college as well i hope this drabble brings you joy ☺️
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‼️CN&BL FULL FIC CAN BE READ HERE
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You missed who you were thirty minutes ago.
Before Jungkook arrived, you were extremely focused on the essay you've been stalling to get done since last week.
You were set on finishing the paper tonight, determined to submit it a day prior to the deadline – which is two days from now. You've never been a procrastinator and you wouldn't dare start now. But ever since Jungkook called, arriving a little over five minutes after your conversation on the phone and entering your dorm room, you have never been the same. Gone was your will to finish your essay; it yeeted out the window the moment he came in.
It wasn't that he was doing anything wrong, per se. He wasn't pestering you or doing anything to distract you from doing whatever it was you were doing. During the phone call, Jungkook told you he just wanted to hang around and you were in on it. "As long as I finish this essay without you doing anything funny" – that, was what you said. Joking, a little pointed, when he came barging in your door, socks on and hair still slightly wet from the shower he most probably had at his own apartment.
When you said those words, the goof just wiggled his brows, smirking with a look of mischief written all over his face, and then kissed you in such an unnecessarily passionate way that had you internally keening when he broke away. That gave you an initial idea that he would, indeed, do some funny business. If you were honest to yourself, you wouldn't have really minded that at all.
That was thirty minutes ago. Jungkook surprisingly hasn't tried to touch you at all for the past thirty minutes. In the present, he is just sprawled on your bed watching something on your stupid iPad, airpods plugged in both ears, letting you work in peace on your laptop.
Thirty minutes ago, that would've been fine. Because ultimately, you could focus on your essay and finish it then pass it way before the deadline but no, your problem right this moment does not lie on phonology, it lies on why does Jungkook have to lean his back on the headboard, thick eyebrows meeting each other every now and then as he watched his movies, and put that white t-shirt and grey sweatpants on himself?
You've been having an internal battle with yourself trying to fight the urge to look over your shoulders for him every three damn minutes, groaning quietly as you thought about how Jungkook looked so ridiculously hot doing the bare minimum. Literally nothing. He was doing absolutely nothing. And he was making you feel weird in your belly!
Wait. Is it your period? It ended two weeks ago, though, so that is definitely not that. Maybe you are ovulating? You'd have to check your flow app.
Absent-mindedly, you let out the begrudging moan you've been trying to hide.
"God."
As if alarmed, Jungkook suddenly shoots up and speaks after what felt like centuries.
"You okay? Am I bothering you here?" He said, voice dripping with honey and face full of concern. You got even hornier.
Oh my god. You wanted to cry.
You send him a tight-lipped smile. "I'm fine. And uh, no. You're good."
Jungkook doesn't pry further and goes back to his binge. Meanwhile, you force yourself to think of something.
Another long five minutes later, and you are still halfway done with your essay. The unfinished document only seems to taunt you. So, you let out another sigh, quite quiet this time so you don't make Jungkook think he was being an inconvenience. You made up your mind and just decided to give in to your urges.
You shut your laptop down instead of pressing sleep as you are sure there is no way you can do any more work tonight.
Standing up from your seat, you approach Jungkook on your bed.
He looks up at you the moment you hovered over him, taking his eyes off the iPad. When the mattress dips from your weight, Jungkook's lips stretch into a cute smile.
Your horniness dissipates a little over his adorable face.
"Done?" He asks, lifting a hand over your face to tuck a strand of hair away that you didn't even notice. You shake your head. Jungkook leans down to kiss your cheek. "So, tired?"
You scrunch your nose. "Kinda."
He kisses your mouth when a pout forms there.
"Eaten anything yet?" Jungkook scoots over to the side to make room on the bed for you. You fit yourself in the space, albeit tight (this was a dorm room, alright), and Jungkook is quick to slide his arm under your neck while he still holds the iPad on the other.
"Just reheated some leftover pasta from last night." You cringe over your last meal. It didn't taste good at all but you were way too hungry and delivery took forever to your dorm.
Jungkook seems to know that that pasta was shit, but he doesn't comment on that. Just hums and kisses the side of your head.
Ugh.
"Wanna order something in? Thai?" He suggests, looking at you.
But right now, eating Thai or whatever is the last thing on your mind. Though you would like to eat something else.
You tell him so. Except the last part, of course. Please. You have decorum.
"Uhm, no. I think I'll pass on that. Unless you haven't eaten." you say, playfully pointing a finger to his chest.
"Nah, Taehyung cooked dinner. I'm pretty full." Jungkook says, chuckling.
You had a smart remark on your tongue, something along the lines of, "Then why'd you offer to eat if you already have, weirdo" but to be honest with yourself, you already knew why. Jungkook liked seeing you eat. Dude practically buys most of your meals, now that you think about it.
But your still horny-adled brain went to go and tell your hand to search for his bare stomach under his shirt. And so it did. Forget about having decorum, shame is out the door when you press your palm to the flat surface of his stomach.
"Doesn't feel full at all." You commented, feeling the hard ridges of his abs. You hate them right now. But you would also really, really, like to see them.
Jungkook only chuckles at that. Before he can say anything, you ask him, "Hey, quick question."
"Hm?"
"Can I suck your dick?"
"Huh?" Jungkook, ever the man he is, put the iPad away for the first time since he's been here. Confused, but still, you could not have mistaken the look of pure interest in his face the moment you asked him that.
"I want to suck your dick, if you let me." You say, clearing yourself up. You are putting on a brave face, but internally, you are screaming.
So what if this thing between you has been happening for like… ten months now, almost a year? Jungkook was usually the one to always initiate sex and blowjobs were almost a rare occurrence in your sex life because you told him it hurt your knees but the real reason was because you didn't think you were very good at it. Jungkook never asks for it either, and sometimes you feel bad for only reciprocating handjobs during oral sex quickies but! He never says anything about it so maybe that was fine? Anyway, it's not like this is gonna be your first time sucking him. It's just the first time you initiated with your own words.
"Oh, you're serious?" Jungkook scoots over to his side and lays sideways to prop himself up. "Really?" He has an excited smile on, and you know that because of the way his eyes crinkle.
"Don't make me repeat it." You say pointedly, pushing him a little bit. Jungkook doesn't even budge at the slight attack, only holds your hands in his.
"No, I just… I thought you said no fooling around tonight." He says.
You shrug. "Yeah, well."
You don't expect him to tug you closer to him using his hold on you, and you were thankful you managed to suppress a loud squeal when he laid on his back and caught your whole body on top of his.
"I guess you can't resist my charm, after all." Jungkook says, grabbing a handful of your ass.
"Jungkook, please, you're scaring my lady boner off." You roll your eyes as you adjust yourself on top of him to get more comfortable.
"Take care of my gentleman boner then, baby." He counters and just because of that you avoid the kiss he was about to give you.
"Don't ever say gentleman boner ever again." You pinch his nipple and he let out a laugh at your petty retort. You knew he was sensitive there. But even then, you were starting to feel the growing need concealed under his sweats, and you were set on giving him the blowjob of his life tonight for some reason.
"I have a suggestion to make," Jungkook says suddenly, stopping you from crawling down to his body. You arch your brow at him, he continues, "I don't think we've ever tried sixty-nine, yet, haven't we? Because I also really want to eat you out right now."
"Oh, well, yeah…" you nod. You find yourself heating up at the way he casually tells you the last part.
"So…?"
You haven't really tried that either, and not just with him, but also with your other sex partners that only really summed up to less than four people, and that's including Jungkook. Anyway, the sixty-nine position sounded interesting.
"Okay, sure." You shrug.
"Fuck, you're the best."
This time, you give in to the kiss he gives you and pretty much after that it turns into a heavy make-out session with Jungkook fondling your boobs underneath your overused highschool PE shirt while you ground down against his erection that only kept growing harder as seconds passed.
You are panting when you break away, a string of saliva in between your lips, breathing for some air. Jungkook kisses his way down your neck, suckling on your skin and soothing it with his tongue.
"Take your shirt off," you say, already impatiently tugging at the hem of his clothing.
Without a word, Jungkook frees himself from the fabric. "You too, and your panties. Please."
You chuckle at the "please" but nonetheless straddle him to take your shirt off. Jungkook looks up at you with hooded eyes, massaging the bare skin of your waist as you wriggle your hair out of the neckline. He grips your waist as you lift your bum off his stomach, pulling your panties and shorts down in one go one leg to another.
"Shit," Jungkook hissed at the sight of your glistening pussy that has gotten wet overtime, hands roaming all over your body like he doesn't really know where to touch. Always fascinated and in awe with what you show him, always so eager, so touchy. And you always love his undivided attention. Makes you feel like a princess for some reason. Doesn't help that he calls you that sometimes, too.
"Oh, fuuck," he groaned when you sat on his stomach. You couldn't help but let out a quiet moan, too, feeling his hot skin and your cold pussy touching together. "Angel, fuck, come here, let me kiss you."
You lean down to kiss him and he quickly reciprocates, his tongue entering your parted mouth, swirling and licking inside, taking your breath away. You could feel yourself smearing your wet mess on his abs but you couldn't really care less, not when Jungkook looked like he couldn't, too, squeezing every inch of you he could get his hands on. And they were everywhere, alright. Your breasts, your waist, hips, ass, his thumb on the inside of your thighs, all the while kissing you like he was hungry for it.
Jungkook jostles you a little when he lifts himself up a little to slide down the grey sweatpants you have a love and hate relationship with, his dick shooting up his abdomen and touching your ass as a result.
He stops kissing you.
"Alright, one more minute of you grinding against me will make me nut. Sit on my face now, baby."
Blood shoots up your cheeks, making you feel hot. A little funny, given what you are doing right now. But he can't just be so casual about it! He was asking you to sit on his face like he was telling you the grass is green. Regardless, you kiss him one last time.
"Don't suffocate." You warned him, already reversing your position as easily as you can so that your back is facing him.
You hear Jungkook chuckling from behind. "Please, I'll die happily suffocating in this pussy."
"Please don't talk about dying." You deflect, already feeling so shy about the whole thing. Indeed it was your first time to try this position, and you quite didn't know how to act. You wonder if he's done this already in the past, but found yourself irritated at the thought of him doing this with anybody else. You'd have to assess what that feeling of irritation means later.
"Hmm," Jungkook hums, grabbing the globes of your ass and fondling them before you could even properly place your knees on both sides of his head. With his hold on the flesh, he pulls you closer to him until you feel his breath on your core. "Ah, shit, will never get tired of this pussy, baby. Fuck, you're so wet."
You try to focus your attention on his hard dick against his stomach, veiny and rigid, red at the tip and shining with pre-cum. Wrapping your fingers around the base, you lean down a little more so that you can begin teasing him.
But Jungkook beats you down to it as he licks a long stripe across your pussy. It has you keening and stumbling a little over, feeling so good at the contact of his tongue against your sex. You hear him hiss before he says, "Come on, pretty, sit on my face, don't hover."
You hesitate before giving in, and Jungkook is quick to continue the ministrations of his tongue on your pussy. The position was so new to you but you couldn't help but think it was so good, feeling him this way, albeit still a little conscious about cutting off his air supply. But as Jungkook starts licking and sucking, you remember his cock in your hand and it prompts you to stroke him up and down; slow, because your mind is cloudy from the way you could hear the slick of your pussy from Jungkook's licking.
Leaning down, you kiss the head of his cock, licking his pre-cum off the top. There was Jungkook's groan again, and you thought that was a good sign, then continued to suck his tip a little just to see it getting even redder.
Jungkook suddenly gets more aggressive in the ministrations of his tongue, from his slow yet precise strokes, he starts increasing speed, fingers getting tighter on your asscheeks, the tip of his tongue prodding at your entrance giving you a taste of being full.
It prompted you to whimper, Jungkook only humming, seemingly pleased with himself. Letting out a shaky breath, you resume stroking his cock, twisting your fingers around the base. Soon, you lean even closer so that you can wrap your lips around the head.
Jungkook's groan was a pure sinful sound of pleasure as you did so. Nevermind that he was having his own feast on your pussy, you were determined to make him cum. And to do that was to suck on the tip gently at first, swirling your tongue on the cum that's building up on it. You joined the motion of it with your hand stroking the shaft up and down, cheeks hollowed and sucking the air in your mouth to create a suction that has Jungkook slightly jolting in his position.
"Oh, fuck yeah, baby, that's it, you're so good at this… shit," He says behind you, moving his mouth off your pussy and replacing it with two fingers. Jungkook slides them in easily, the squelching sound so apparent it cannot be mistaken for anything else if there was anybody but you two in the room. "You like this, baby? Hm? You're taking my fingers and my cock so well."
You moaned around his cock, heat starting to spread all over your body as Jungkook began to join his digits with his own mouth, devouring your pussy like he always does when he goes down. You start losing your rhythm on his cock, choking on it a third time now as you haven't really managed to fit it all in your mouth. You've always tried to, but he's always been a little too big for you. If it was a skill issue, you didn't care, Jungkook enjoys it just as much as you do.
When Jungkook rubs your clit, that's when you start shaking on your knees, threatening to crumble down.
As if he knew what was coming, Jungkook suddenly says, "Don't come yet, baby, not now." and you swear you would have actually cried.
What you didn't expect is Jungkook suddenly sitting up, his hands gripping your hips so that you don't jostle on top of him. You let go of his dick as he slides you off his body, and you let him manhandle you into sitting on his cock that slides in too easily like your pussy was fine silk. You now sit on top of him in what seems to be like a reverse cowgirl position, except that you aren't the one in control of your own movements.
"Oh, K-kook – Jungkook!" you yelped as he bounced you on his rigid dick, your body melting against his.
"Shh, take my cock, angel. You can do that for me, right? You're so pretty right now, I wish you could see yourself." Jungkook whispers against your hair, and you pathetically nod, craning your neck up at him to seek for his mouth. He smiles at you, the gentle nature of it so contrasting to the way he was controlling your hips, bouncing you in and out of his cock. "My pretty little angel."
He kisses you passionately, and as seconds passed his hands began to travel upwards to cup your breast, fondling it in his hand and pinching your nipple. You also started to initiate your pwn movements, meeting Jungkook's thrusts from below you, all the whole moaning in his mouth at the pleasure of his cock touching every crevice of your pussy.
The feeling of this never gets old even if you've done it exclusively and quite constantly with each other for the past ten months. Sex with Jungkook is always just so intense it always keeps you on your toes.
"K-kook, I'm cumming," you gasped in his mouth, feeling that build up in your belly
"Hm," Jungkook leaves your boob in favor of your pussy. Kissing you one last time on the mouth, he leans against your shoulder to watch as he spreads your nether lips. You look down to his hand there, fingers spreading the lips apart witnessing your own hole getting split open by his engorged cock. The sight was so lewd and obscene you couldn't help your moan. Then, Jungkook begins rubbing your clit again, fast and with a purpose, this time to make you finish. And he finally gives you the green light to do so. "You can cum now, baby."
And as if prompted by his simple words, you came, feeling a gush of wetness coming out of your pussy. You watch the way Jungkook kept his fingers in there, massaging your hole and kissing your neck.
"Jungkook…" you bury your face into the crook of his neck as you come down from your high, pussy throbbing and spasming from the intense feeling of cumming. He did edge you from when he ate you out.
"Good girl."
And again, Jungkook changes your position. From sitting up, you are now laid against the bed again, with him switching your positions so now he's the one hovering and you underneath him. He grabs your hips up and enters your pussy once again, sliding his cock in and out to chase his own orgasm. Your moans only encourage him to go faster, his grunts filling the room.
"Oh, that's it, Kook, you come for me too." You say, reaching for his stomach with one hand and fondling your own boob with other for his own consumption. Jungkook always liked seeing you play with them.
"Yeah, you're so sexy like that," he says, even picking up his speed higher.
Soon, he was cumming with a pained groan, and you didn't expect to cum a second time the same time he did.
Another gush of slickness slides down your pussy while Jungkook pulled out completely. But he was putting it in again a second later, rubbing his dick against your core. You sigh, partly at the sensitivity but also how pleasurable it all still felt even though you've come twice now in the span of almost what? – thirty minutes? Maybe an hour?
"Pretty fucking pussy you've got here, baby," Jungkook says before pushing his cum back into you, making you cry out. "Never gonna get enough of this. Of you."
You whimpered, clinging to his forearms as he continued his actions.
"Cum for me one more time?" He asks, staring deeply into your eyes.
And you couldn't possibly do that. Coming twice was not at all what you envisioned your night to be, thrice was a heart attack. But at the same time, you couldn't really resist his pleading eyes and his deep voice and his still hard cock pushing his creampie deeper into you.
So you nod your head, and Jungkook leans down to swipe the strand of hairs that sprouted all over your face overtime, wet on the hairline from your sweat, just before he slides his cock all the way in again, repeating that in and out routine, the slamming and the bottoming out, the quickening oh his pace and your toes curling once again that impeded your orgasm for the third time that night.
When you finished, exhausted and spent the fuck out, Jungkook laid on your boobs and kissed all over, playing with one of your nipples in his other hand. You were flat on the bed, dead weight, looking up at the ceiling and closing your eyes to cool yourself from what had just happened.
"Okay, that's enough, Kook, we gotta clean up." You say, massaging the soft curls on the top of his head.
He only let out a non-committal hum.
"Jungkook."
"Yes, baby?"
"Enough sex. I'm fried." You say, pulling his hair slightly to make him look up at you. But that was a bad decision of course 'cause he only seemed to enjoy the teasing.
"Just saying hello to these amazing boobs of yours." You rolled your eyes at his retort, nonetheless accepting it.
"Thanks, I guess."
Eventually, Jungkook stopped being clingy and finally found the will to fetch a wet rag from the bathroom. He cleaned you up and and you didn't bother dressing up except the panties you asked him to get for you. Soon after that, you cuddle together in bed.
"Hey," Jungkook suddenly whispers behind you, fingers massaging your hip, mouth press to your head. You hum. "I think we should do that more."
You try to look over your shoulder. "What? The sex?" you say, chuckling.
Jungkook pinches your hip. "Yeah, I told you we should have sex everyday. But that's not the point, I meant the sixty-nine."
"Well, first of all, having sex everyday is physically not possible," you roll your eyes though he couldn't see. "Second, I enjoyed that position, too. A little bit distracting, but definitely really enjoyable."
Jungkook agrees. "I think you just gave me the best blowjob of my life, if you wanna know."
"Really?" you confirmed, smiling up at him.
"Almost nutted when you sucked my head."
You chuckle, slapping his chest and roll your eyes again for how many times now?
"No but seriously…" Jungkook suddenly turns, indeed, serious. But he's still smiling, though, just a little less playful with his tone. "What was with you tonight? Did you finish that essay?"
Oh god, your essay. Right.
You feel your cheeks heat up a little remembering how you were basically thirsting over him him a while ago. And for no reason too.
Despite cringing internally, you shrug. "No, not really, but submission's two days from now and I just wanted to kiss you, I guess."
That made Jungkook's smile even bigger. He doesn't say anything more but only scoots even closer to your neck, kissing your hair.
"Hm, I always wanna kiss you too, and I do. But I love it when you ask for it."
You think you'll start doing it more, too.
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all rights reserved © AWRKIVE , 2023
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thottybrucewayne · 4 months
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A LIST OF PEOPLE WHO ARE GOING TO HELL: 2024 EDITION
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Every zionist, duh, but esp yall who screenshot perfectly reasonable posts and go "Um, the look at this idiot who thinks genocide is wrong" yall make my ass itch and nobody takes you seriously, MOVE. 2. The entire U.S. government but esp Joe Biden that old ass man gettin spit roasted in hell (AND NOT THE FUN KIND!) 3. DIDDY AND EVERY SINGLE PERSON THAT PROTECTED AND DEFENDED HIM. 4. Tory Lanez whole family, his mama, his daddy, his dog? All them. 5. The nonblack people who run those Rap House Tv type blogs that are clearly trying to be shade room clones. 6. People who get all their news from the Shade Room and Whatsapp, sorry auntie, I'm sick of you tellin' me COVID can be cured by sticking cloves of garlic up my nose :/ 7. Every single one of you dirtbag leftist ass people, yall do nothing for nobody except you thousands of adoring "former nazi" fans that need to be told it's okay that they still say the n word in private. 8. N.O.R.E and every single hiphop "journalist" 9. Charlemagne Tha God and Dj Envy, they know why. 10. Everyone who made Ike and Tina jokes after Tina past away. Grow up. 11. You fanfic girlies. So many of y'all are seeing the lake of fire, But esp if you donate to ao3 or own ao3 merch. Like, that is just embarrassing. 12. It's 2024, If I see you coming up here saying shit like "Miku wroke harry potter!" or " Hello Kitty wrote Ofmed, actually" I'm sending you to hell myself. 13. Booktokers? This is yall the second year on this list, tighten the fuck up and stop being weird about strange men on the internet, now. 14. People who do LITERALLY NOTHING yet try to tell other people how to be activists. You contribute nothing to any conversation you're a part of, suck my dick from the back. 15. People who stopped masking because other people were making them feel bad. Fuck your mama not being able to see your smile, PEOPLE ARE DYING???? 16. Lana Del Ray and Taylor Swift. They know exactly what they did. 17. Every white girl on twt who tried to jump me cause I said the Barbie movie is white feminism at its finest. 18. Elon, you raggedy bitch. 19. Every single man who hit on me this year who isn't one of my friends. 20. People who don't know what transmisogyny means and make that everyone else's problem. I need yall to start reading so bad it's not even funny. 21. You "goth is a feeling" people. You gonna be "feeling" that hell fire nippin' at your ass, NEXT 22. You 35 defending fanservice of high schoolers in anime/manga all day every day...yeah, just get on down there, big fella. They waiting on you. 23. Cishet Black men on tiktok and twt who make it their life's mission to make an ass of themselves for minor ducats. You are a one-man modern-day minstrel show and you will be dealt with. 24. White Tyler The Creator fans. Y'all know what you do.
Dishonorable mentions: Shojo fans who never talk about the fucked up shit in the manga they recc you because "At least its not as misogynistic as shounen!" (yes, yes it is) Fashion tiktokkers I hate so many of you its not even funny Every person who put the image of T.D. Jakes getting his doonies beat down at a Diddy party in my mind. Like I literally never needed to think about that. My dad <3 and all my friends' dads. Patricide NOW!!!!! People who are still whining about having to boycott shut upppppp god damn. People who stare at me in public. You got a fuckin problem?????
That's a wrap! Here are the lists from last year and the year before feel free to add more in the tags <3
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mrs-monaghan · 7 months
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Its funny you added that “secret informant” on your post because I was actually thinking the same thing. Jungkooks not one to shy away from this type of stuff, seen it with the stalker stuff and the person sending food to his apartment. Even today hes telling everyone hes not innocent. Basically he speaks his mind so to see him quiet about this definitely raises some eyebrows
Right? Like what he said about antis was so hot of him
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God damn JK aint playing around. I'm gonna go ahead and say he speaks for both of them coz Jimin sure don't give a shit either. Love this for them.
Do you hear that antis? JK hates y'all 🤭🤭
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vlovers19 · 5 months
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Tae didn't even say a word about Jimin. Why make a public post in the manner he did for Jk, but not his soulmate, bff, the one he said he likes the most and can't live without. I feel so sad. I been sitting here crying for days hearing Vmin were gonna be separated and Tae doesn't even say a word about him. He's just focused on Wooga and Jk. I really thought Layover rekindled something in Vmin. But now I am thinking maybe not. They are just friends. Jimin is getting massacred cause he's enlisting with Jk, while Tk is trending. And now Vmin are being dragged by both jkk and tkk, cause Tae just ignored him. This is the worst I have felt in a long time. Even worse then paris.
Its not like I was expecting a Vmin live or selfie or public goodbye in the first place, but now that Tae has done it for others, it just really feels empty. I even lied to myself and said maybe its just too hard on them and they are struggling with saying their final goodbyes, but I don't think I even believe that anymore and that is what hurts. At this point I'm just gonna say I wish them safety and happiness. I'm just lost with everything else.
I know it's quite annoying. I even felt a bit irked when Taehyung didn't do anything to commemorate his relationship with Jimin publicly especially at such a critical time, knowing they wouldn't be able to see each other in a long time but then, choosing mostly to show his interactions with Jungkook, his Wooga friends and his high school friends. But he didn't disclose pictures of him with his family. He chose to keep that to himself. Again, he didn't tell anyone when Park seo Joon had to live in his house because he was renovating his own home. It was Park seo Joon who disclosed it himself.
Actor, Park bo gum who is his very close friend and fellow Celine ambassador was silent during Taehyung's entire enlistment process but nobody drags him about it because at the back of everyone's minds, we know he must have wished him well off camera. Rm's sister posted pictures of their family during his enlistment but there were no pictures of Taehyung with his family. Why? Because he chose to keep them private which I believe he also did with Jimin and if they are close the way I think they are, then it's understandable the reason why.
The members all had a joint live and judging from vmin's interactions, where they were so giggly and interactive with each other especially with Jimin finding it difficult to restrain himself from touching Taehyung, I wonder how it's possible for them to suddenly become so cold to each other so soon after wards? It makes no sense.
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Now as for who is going with who to the military, i wonder why it's distressing people. The only thing I hate about the whole situation is that Jk has to go to the military when he still has a few more years left. He is doing this to keep up with 2025 bts reunion when even his fellow 97 liner friends aren't even thinking about it yet. That is sad. I had thought the members would all go one after the other. However, that was not to be.
Funny enough, the moment I heard that Jimin and Jungkook used the buddy system to enlist together, I became more convinced that they're not a couple. It won't be easy to hide a gay relationship especially for people as famous as them. Let's say the soldiers don't care but they do have family members who are fans of them, who would want to know every detail about their lives. Sure enough, all eyes would be on them to get juicy scoops. There will even be haters looking for an opportunity to take them down. They have to be extremely careful. They can't make a single mistake and that alone is very exhausting. If they were in a relationship, this situation could even put a strain in it. Life isn't fantasy, it's a cold hard reality. I believe Jimin and Jungkook decided to use the buddy system to make things easier. Enlisting in the army for introverted shy people like themselves can be a nightmare. At least, the fact that they can be together makes the whole experience more tolerable. But being stuck to one another also makes them a target of people's eyes because the entire country is well aware of their controversial ship. If they're in a relationship which I doubt, then they made a really risky move.
Anyway, people who are busy making an issue out of this should simply get a life. They have nothing better to do with their time which is why they decide to hate on celebrities hoping to control their lives since theirs isn't going well. Tomorrow, Jimin and Jungkook will enter the military and we won't see them again for a very long time. We should only focus on making their departure a fulfilling one.
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cakejerry · 8 months
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can we PLS talk about their size difference??? their contrasts overall aren't only hot, but it's super adorable? sorry I love them so much kdkelfkkskw
idk im actually kinda pissed, I've been fighting the JIMIN IS NOT THATTT SMALL, IT'S ONLY A FEW INCHES fight since 2015 (jimin stan disease) but he is deadsetttt on proving me wrong like. Oh he's sick I know he gets off on it too like. Muscle kink strength kink having sizequeen fuck......... Ik he wants jk to railllll him seven days a week.... Turns out the fanfic writers saying jimin DROWNS in jk's shirts and nothing else after they fuck were right all along.... Literally yaoi ass proportions, jimin i tried i really did but i could not protect you from the TWINK accusations!! Built like a little spindly fairy at his big age, oh the twink death needs to catch up with him FAST before i lose my mind.... It's actually crazy how much he's suffered from fatphobia in his life while being literally naturally built petite like that, like oh ik he was mad at his baby cheeks, also its funny how a good portion fandom STILL perceives him as this like fertile breedable feminine hips-having soft chubby omega because of them, meanwhile he looks like a strong breeze will blow him away, literal skin and bones it's almost scary to mee........... he will never be free omg JIMIN WE NEED YOU TO COOOK (and eat and gain like 20 pounds EXPEDITIOUSLY and im not kidding)....... Military service you're our last hope
EDIT: notice how I said "he will never be free"... I am fully aware that I am judging his body. He will never please everyone so I'm gonna continue to hate on my blog with 10 followers. But skinnyphobia is not a thing and knowing what preceded his looks now it's safe to say I'm sticking to my diagnosis of "scary" and my insistence that he gain some weight.
Also somebody calling me horny in replies when I am possibly the only person in the world who is not 💀💀
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krista event story tldr by me a person who forgets literally everything and its also very long so ur gonna need a tldr for this tldr
nikki and the gang find a funny fish
aeon was reading about an old city that sunk to the ocean
fish takes them through the ocean of memories
they all jump in and are FINE bc the ocean of memories is A SPECIAL OCEAN UWU
WOW ITS THE CITY THAT SUNK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?!!!!!?!?!?
I WONDER WHAT HAPPENED TO A CITY THAT WORSHIPED A WATER GOD THAT WAS ON AN ISLAND AND IS NOW SUDDENLY IN THE OCEAN HMMMMM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
nikki stares at a statue and sees christine kristy krista the worlds saddest girl next to ashley someone get the kids in this game some therapy no i dont care shes already dead
nikki and the gang get to see what happend to the town
basically things bad :(
but its ok we’ll take this random teenaged girl off the streets and turn her into our saintness bc uh....idk i forgot anyway
u must CRY FOREVER and turn ur tEARS INTO GEMS bc htats just what people can do in miraland i guess
LOCK HER IN A TOWER AND KEEP HER DEPRESSED AND SAD FOR THE REST OF HER LIFE SO WE CAN BECOME RICH I MEAN PLEASE THE GOD
gems get sent to the nobles bc i guess thats how u offer to the god thats how u keep him happy just give to the rich so they can get richer
people in the slums dont want gems they just wanna survive or something u know how it goes
LEWIS HER ONE FRIEND U ALREADY KNOW HOW THIS ENDS
theres flashbacks to other people but honesztly ive already forgotten all of them
the priest is messed up no one missed uuu byeeee
lewis helps her sneak out one day to visit the slumssssssssssssssss
dance with me? no i cannot let people see me
she gets caught or whatever
insert detail of a teenaged girl doomed to cry for the rest of her life being whipped with a water whip bc its what the god wants or whatever idk i hate everyone that isnt krista...i guess lewis is ok
lewis is some kinda actor
uhhh the priest lied and said yeah ur free to go i feel bad :((((((((((((
jk soldier kill the man in front of her
her tears are BLOODY RED GEMS OOOO SPOOKY
the WHOLE PLACE ABOUT TO BLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW except not really its just gonna get destroyed by the water god
krista shows up to everyone in the present day and gives a speech and the big fish was like the spirits of everyone in teh town that died and idk something about this just felt wrong
that all of this and she still thinks this is all her fault and that she will 100% make sure everyone passes on
i mean nikki did try to tell her its not her fault and all that
but everyones like I HOPE THE SPIRITS OF THE TOWN CAN ALL PASS ON IN PEACE
NO SCREW THEM LITERALLY MOST OF THEM DID NOT DESERVE IT THEY LITERALLY STEPPED ON A DEAD MANS BODY AS A CHILD WEPT TEARS AFTER SEEING HIM DIE SO THEY CAN TAKE HER TEAR GEMS AND GET MORE MONEY I HOPE THEY ALL ROT I DONT CARE IF ITS JUST A GOD DANG VIDEO GAME AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
aeon goes ACTUALLY THE WATER GOD TURNED TO THE ABYSS SO HES A DEMON AND BAD
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myreygn · 11 months
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Heyo! For the writing game; how about 18, 11, and 2? :3 (read the tags; I hope you feel better!)
squiggily you're a gem 😭 the cramps are still going strong but i got my tea here and i'm sure i'm gonna be fine, thank you sm ♡♡
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2) Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?
i always have at least an idea of what i wanna do. when it's a request and the idea is already provided by someone else, i usually write around a piece of dialogue, an interaction or based on a title i come up with. in the rare case i write a multi chapter fic, i make a detailed outline before i start writing - i don't always follow it but i swear it exists lol
11) Link your three favorite fics right now
on a scale from 1-10 how narcissistic would it be to link my own stuff 💀 jk, here are my three favorite fics rn - all on ao3!
Carla, play Lover by Taylor Swift by dinosaurmayonnaise: teenagers matchablossom in which kaoru shows kojiro the fancy new ai skateboard he made and kojiro bullies him a little bit
All the splintered light that leaked by quarter_life_crisis: pre canon hashira in which they get absolutely shitfaced to make rengoku feel welcome and sanemi regrets every single second of it (slight nsfw at the end, nothing too explicit tho)
and if love appears, i'll hold its hand (and if it says 'home', i'll think of your name) by ffslynch: haikyuu 5+1 in which kuroo goes through all the love languages while searching for someone he can grow old with and i bawl my eyes out every time i read it because this right here is my favorite fic in the whole wide world and i think everyone should read it
(tons of fics on tumblr i love as well and they will all get their recognition once i find the motivation to rework my recommendation post i promise 😭)
18) Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?
i don't really have a pattern for that. sometimes it's something that i think fits the characters and then i make something up based on that (moving the mountain for example was me thinking: lee gyomei - gyomei is the stone hashira - mountains - he's kind of like a mountain - hey moving the mountain sounds kinda nice - okay now i need a scenario that fits - boom gyomei balancing on a metal pole and tengen mitsuri and sanemi trying to make him fall), sometimes it's a sentence from the fic (what even is college? or Unhand me!, in the case of Unhand me! the title was there before everything else because i thought it was funny and then i constructed the fic around that) and sometimes the title is the last thing i add because i have to add a title even if i can't think of anything catchy (like Flour Magic... really proud of the fic but i hate the title so much 💀)
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send in numbers
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starlightsailfish · 2 years
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After years of wanting to, I finally did it: I watched all 7 SAW films.
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It was such a ride I'm sad it's over and now I don't know what to do with everything I've experienced so Imma do the next best thing and give my thoughts on every movie below the cut! :D
SAW: powerful, brilliant, innovative, and delightfully stupid! The editing is so janky and the story kinda repetitive with how often it goes into flashbacks, but Lawrence and Adam seal the deal for me. It was the only film to really have me sitting there at the end close to tears. Adam's humor is so great, the traps are effective without being super gory, Lawrence is the perfect bastard, and the whole thing just feels so genuine and fun!
SAW 2: The nerve gas one! I loved Amanda and baby Daniel and the cinamatography was really striking in this one! Laura, Allison, and Xavier were all great supporting characters with some hidden depth to them. Also loved Kerry, Eric, and Rigg's dynamic and am sad we never see them all together again. Very solid movie, not the most action-packed so it doesn't hold my attention too well, but still very enjoyable!
SAW 3: FUCK THIS ONE! Hated all the medical stuff and grossness but that's just me. Amanda's story was super interesting and we even got to see Adam again in the most heartbreaking way possible so...yay ;~; ALSO MARK HIIIIII 💖💖💖 Lynn and Amanda's interactions were very fun but Jeff was SO hard to root for with him just standing there half the time while people are dying around him. I get that he's grieving and its an exploration on human behavior or whatever but it wasn't fun to watch for me. I thought I would like this one a lot more but between Jeff being frustrating and the medical sideplot being gross, it was a hard and unenjoyable watch.
SAW 4: SEXIEST SAW!!! We start off with Jigsaw's cock and balls on full display so you know it's gonna be good. /jk MARK AND PETER ARE HEREEEEE OMG HIIII. Rigg is super interesting (and handsome) as he starts to fall into Jigsaw's teachings and the traps are just the right amount of gory for me! The cop side-plot is super enjoyable because Perez and Strahm are just so GOOD and funny and pretty and hnngngnnnh. Peter is such an asshole but I LOVE him! The story just feels so alive with the setting constantly changing for both of the plots and the flashbacks are pretty nice as well with Peter's little quips added in during the interogations. Opposite of SAW 3, I thought SAW 4 would be forgettable but it ended up being a big favorite!
SAW 5: This one was ok. Mark and Peter are in it so of COURSE that's a plus and we get more on poor meow meow Mark's backstory! However, the trap plot and cop plot feel so disconnected that it's almost distracting how disjointed the movie feels. I don't think it's reveiled until SAW 6 that the trap plot was tied to Strahm and even then it's mentioned so briefly. It really just feels like a group of random corrupt people were trapped just to give the movie it's gore. At least Mallick and Brit are super fun! Strahm's character feels less fun as he's mostly there to discover Hoffman's backstory and in the end he's killed off so that's no fun :(
SAW 6: BEST ONE!!! It's got it all: a connected trap and cop plot, plenty of Hoffman and John character moments, sympathetic and silly characters like William, gruesome traps (that are a little unfair but whatever), and to top it all off, it takes place in an abandoned zoo which is such a fun setting! We also get Jill's ultimate girlboss moment and Mark narrowly escaping the reverse beartrap in such a sick scene. Perez comes back only to die again which sucks but her death scene has such an incredible build up that I can't be too mad. We also get Mark awkwardly running up the stairs so honestly? This movie slaps.
SAW 7: Yeah everyone was right, this movie kinda sucks. Bobby's an interesting enough character and the survivor group scene was so COOL since we got to see Mallick and Tara and Simone and LAWRENCE again!!!! EVIL KING!!! HE'S SO FUNNY WHY DOES HE ACT LIKE THAT??? Mark is now a cheesy slasher but I'm ok with that cause I'm a freak. The visuals feel way too clean and generic and cheap and the pink blood is so distracting. Even still, the traps are either really boring or really gross so I wasn't paying the best attention... Gibson is annoying but also really funny and the main plots just feel really out of place when they don't focus on Jill or Mark. Anyways, the ending absolutely slapped though and left me feeling way too many feelings as Laarence entered the old bathroom trap and we see Adam's corpse... I think the movie was worth it for the ending alone but there were still fun scenes here and there!
Overall, my personal faves are SAW 6 and SAW 4!
Least faves are SAW 3 and SAW 2 but they all have their enjoyable moments!
Thank you all for coming to my Tedtalk! Leave your top SAW movies in the comments so we can chat!
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bbina · 5 days
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I was not prepared for last chapter user bbina 😭😭😭😭😭 also omzzz Seok got a girlie 🤭🤭🤭 ngl this is the best work I've read till this date frr like usually if the story gets to detailed i start losing interest and sometimes the slow updates too (but i understand that cuz we're human🫂) but BTL had me invested since the v beginning till the end everyday i used to wait eagerly for the next chapter 😭😭 it's a bit sad that it has ended 😭😭 thinking about all the plots by anons : the love triangle, tgat one anon thinking 💊 had a part where yn dies and also i still laugh at how quickly bbinaverse turned against yn when she made Binnie cry we were ready to k word her and even mentally prepared for a whole new character as Binnie's new partner 😭omg as much as I'm excited for the future work of yours I'm srs gonna miss BTL era sm it'll always be v close to my heart🩷 thank you so much user bbina for giving my precious ynbin an interesting love life 🤪😭 ilysm thank you for working hard
SEOK GOT CUFFED 😭 WONBIN IS FREE FROM HIS CHAINS OF BEING TORMENTED!! ITS EUNSEOK'S TURN TO FEEL WONBIN'S WRATH!!!! jk
thank you so much for sticking around til the end!!! usually people start to leave once the climax hits and no one rlly sticks around for the ending but THANK YOU FOR PUSHING THROUGH AND INVESTED IN BTL!! HOPE UR TIME WASN'T WASTED!!!!
god the 299792 different canon endings because of our tenants creativity 😭 y'all are so fucking funny the pill and wave poll rlly did a number on everyone after yn literally broke wonbin's heart 😭 UNITED WE STAND FOR PARK WONBIN!!!!! lowkey was preparing an ending where yn didn't end up with nobody at all bc everyone HATED yn so bad 😭 yall acted like it wasn't a self insert fic but yn is a whole entity 😭
thank you so much for reading!!!!!! i'm truly am so grateful for the readers who took their time of day to read and keep up with btl 🥹 fruits of labor tbh... like i wish i can tell u all about how i plotted btl from the start AAHHHH i really am so happy you guys enjoyed it the way i enjoyed every process of making it!!!
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i had the bestttttt weekend dude
got in late friday, denver airport is weird all the rumors r true. he picked me up & took me back to his place, he lives in a house w 3 other dudes and lowkey being in that environment made me miss the community aspect of having roommates lol anyway got there & immediately fucked 🥰 and it was so nice and so good ahhhhhhh and then fell asleep and then woke up and fucked again dude those times are my favorites when yr just alternating bw cuddling and sleeping and talking and fucking its the best
but then we got food from this place i really love but never go to bc the only locationnin chicagonis downtown and i hate going downtown hahahah but theres a location in CO so we went dude i cant wait to tell bianca this particular detail shes gna lose itttt like AHH that is just so good
Anyway we got back and ate and then met up w a bunch of his friends at this one place, it was one guys birthday and they did a cake flip which i never knew was a thing so that was funny & i got nice and buzzed real quick cause that shit hits different in the mountains but everyone was really chill and nice and funny! There were hella people & they were all cool it rocked
Went to a 2nd place and started talking to the girlies more, JK dropped lore that all the girls are bi and i was like lets gooooooo lmfao and bc i'm a girls girl and a great time obviously we vibed and talked and kiki'd
Ok fr though. 3 different girls asked me what was going on w me and him. 3 girls!!!!! Ok see i fucking love girls like no dude would ever ask me about it hahahahah but they all loved my energy and we super vibed esp this one girl emily whos dating dude's roommate
Came back to the house & started doing uhhh pepsi which i really hadnt done in a long time but it was fun and a vibe!!! Talked to hella ppl got drunker had a fun chill time 😎 i had to tap out early bc dude gave me an edible and it hit like a train lmfao but dude followed me in and we talked more and made out and he said "my friends really like you" i was like I LIKE THEM TOOO 🥰
Kinda chilled didnt do much the last 2 days it was nice. i like him so so so so so soooooooooooo much dude. one of the girls (she literally said "[dudes name] is a green flag" also 🥹🥰🥰 its trueeee he is so good!) asked what i like about him and i genuinely said everything 🥰🥰🥰🥰 which is true!! And which ive been wanting to say but didnt have anyone to say it to!!! GOD i love girls i love being a girl at times like these lol but yes genuinely i like everything about him. The other day i made a note where i listed everything specifically and it made me fucking cry hahahahahah
bro i'm down sooo badddddd. i want to ask him to be my boyfriend PERO LIKE i also dont wanna be monog? and i dont want to pressure him into smth hes not down for and i dont really know how to bring up that convo. idk ahhhh i just like him so very very much.
bought a flight for spring break. spicys comin back baybeeee! i cant wait to see himmmmmmm aah ok im gonna make another post to talk abt a different topic uhh hahah ok
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yslkook · 3 years
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good years (1)
mind of mine masterlist
summary: you arrive at hobi’s birthday party, along with some of your other friends. pairing: “badboy” jk x “shy/reserved” oc warnings: alcohol, cursing, excessive use of pet names...bc its me
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Being late to events, especially events in honor of your friends, was your least favorite thing. Punctuality was one of your top three favorite things about yourself, and yet here you were- nearly sprinting through the streets in heels because you were an idiot and had gotten the name of the bar wrong.
Instead of the Silver Spoon, you’d ended up at the Silver Tongue. That’s what happens when you don’t check your text messages for confirmation and operate on autopilot. So now, you were about an hour and a half late (as if the absence of the birthday boy and his merry band of friends at the Silver Spoon didn’t tell you enough).
Oh well. 
By the time you arrive about twelve blocks away to the Silver Spoon, you quickly make sure that not a hair is out of place before walking into the bar to try to blend in, as if you’d been there the whole time.
“Hobi!” You chirp, finding your friend in the middle of all of the chaos, “Happy birthday, Hobi-”
Hobi turns to greet you, a big (drunk) smile plastered across his face. “You’re late! Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”
“Well, I-uh, this is gonna sound dumb, but-”
You’re interrupted by a few of the guys walking into the bar, causing a ruckus and nearly screeching Hobi’s name. At least you’re not the only one who’s late. And you quickly see Sora in your line of sight, entering in behind the guys.
Sora, your best friend of several years since college. She’s been with you since the beginning, taking you under her wing when you were both young and in college. She had brought you out of your shell a bit, inviting you to parties and inviting you to have dinner with her in the dining hall. The slow convenience of college had blossomed into something real, something that could stand the test of time- also known as the test of post-graduate life.
Her friendship was an adventure to say the least.
“Hey,” You beam at her with drinks for both of you in your hands, “Fancy seeing you here-”
“Hey,” She grins, pulling you in for a hug, “Work was so shitty, like, I had to stay late today. Of all days! I can’t wait to have a fuckin’ drink.”
“Yeah, here’s something funny-” But your words are cut off yet again, by the arrival of more friends. It looks like Sora had invited some of her own friends, friends that you weren’t quite sure liked you very much.
But you don’t dwell on that, instead sipping on your drink and settling on people watching. Settings like this unnerve you- being in a place where you’re not quite friendly with everyone in attendance makes you feel self-conscious. It’s easier to just stay in the background, blend into the walls, so as to not upset yourself-
“Hey, you,” Comes a familiar voice to your right. It’s Yoongi, one of your fellow people watcher enthusiasts. He stands next to you, shoulder brushing against yours.
“Hey, you,” You repeat, flashing him a smile and a playful shove to his shoulder, “How have you been? It’s been a while, Yoongi.”
“You’re the one who’s been hiding,” Yoongi teases, “All cooped up at home.”
“So have you! In your studio,” You protest, poking his shoulder.
“I guess I can’t argue there.”
“No, you really can’t,” You say, “So tell me then, what’s new? What’s coming out of the studio these days?”
You enjoy hearing him speak, the way his passion for his craft pouring through his words. He invites you (again) to stop by the studio if you ever want to. You promise to stop by soon, with his favorite snacks. You usually try to stop by his studio at least once a month to catch up with him. He’s also one of your oldest friends, along with Hobi.
“Hey,” Comes another voice to your left this time. It’s a voice you definitely recognize, a voice that makes you tense up immediately.
Jeon Jungkook has always had a way of making you stammer over your words, ever since Yoongi and Hobi had introduced you to him years ago. He’s tall, nearly always dressed in all black, tattoos and piercings coloring his frame, and something sweet and sinful swirls in his dark eyes.
You don’t know if it’s a look that is reserved for you or if he looks at everyone like this, but honestly, your brain short circuits every time he glances your way.
“H-hi,” You mumble, taking a sip of your drink to ease your jumpy nerves. Jungkook only grins at you, his bunny smile a stark contrast to the rest of his aura.
“Been a while, huh?” Jungkook says, voice smooth and sweet like molasses. 
“Y-yeah, been busy,” You mutter. You watch in mild panic as Yoongi walks away, being called away by Namjoon and Taehyung.
“Missed you, baby,” Jungkook winks at you. Somehow, he always gravitates to you at these types of events. Not that you’ll particularly complain- his attention makes you feel warm, even if it’s all for jokes and fun.
As Sora repeatedly has told you.
According to her, he’s the worst- a player, a fuckboy (when he was apparently too old to be one, her words not yours) and this is how he treats any pretty girl. So you don’t take it too seriously, only indulging him a bit and keeping him out of your periphery.
But you won’t deny that his recent use of the pet name might make you swoon a little bit.
“Oh, stop,” You wave him off with heat rising in your cheeks. And he knows it, too, from the self-assured smirk he throws you.
“How’s work been? They got you crunching numbers and all that?” Jungkook asks, ordering himself a beer and a drink for you.
“That’s literally my job, but right now, we just got access to a new database so I’m excited to see what kinds of visualizations and insights we can bring forward. We’re moving forward to proactive analysis, but you know, we’re still a ways away from that, we still react to problems so reactively. Like we’re just putting out fires all the time, it’s kinda tiring but I’m excited-” You cut yourself off at your rambling, sheepishly laughing, “Oh, you should’ve stopped me. I know it’s boring.”
“It’s not boring, not if it’s important to you,” Jungkook shrugs, “Besides, I like hearing you talk.”
“Really? You really wanna hear about the latest and greatest happening in the data world?”
“I wanna hear about anything you have to say, baby,” Jungkook says easily. You squeeze your drink in your hand tightly to ground yourself.
This is why he intimidates you- his affections have only increased in the last few months. It’s like he’s playing a game with you, trying to see how long it takes for you to crack. You don’t know how sincere he is when he turns the charm on- is this how he talks to everyone, or is it just you? 
You like to think it’s just you (because you at least dare to call him a friend of yours), but he could get anyone he sets his eyes on. Rather than spiralling down that train of thought, you bask in his flirtations, his gentle affections hidden under his very many layers of black.
Before you can reply to ask him about the tattoo parlor and about his newly purchased motorcycle, Sora interrupts you both. You’re oblivious to the deadly glare that Jungkook shoots her, and the glare that she shoots right back at him.
She whisks you away, an arm tight around your shoulders. You turn your head and look back at Jungkook apologetically.
This is how it always is, especially for the last few months. As soon as Sora sees Jungkook and you speaking, she’ll immediately do anything to intervene. It’s fucking annoying and Jungkook is beginning to dislike Sora more and more each time he has the misfortune of coming in contact with her. He doesn’t really care about whatever personal vendetta your best friend has for him.
He’s always thought Sora was a conniving woman, full of manipulation and tricks up her sleeve. Ever since Yoongi and Hobi had introduced you to their friend group (and you had brought Sora along as well). His instincts are hardly ever wrong, but he hates to see you spiral with her.
But he’s powerless to stop you from walking away from him. Yet again.
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tags: @kookdbean​
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ve1vetyoongi · 4 years
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wherever you will go | jjk
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Pairing: Jungkook x female reader
Genre: actor!oc, director!jungkook, smut, angst, humour.
Word count: 21k
Summary:  Not much happens when you grow up by the coast. Tourists come and go, the theatre where you work shows the same shows over and over and there’s always sand and salt in the air. Your dreams of making it big in the city are exactly that: dreams. When your hopes of becoming an actress are shattered into a million pieces, you find yourself getting drawn to a captivating up-and-coming movie director by the name of Jeon Jungkook. With his bright eyes and charming smile, he seems determined to glue your pieces back together -- even if it means leaving Ocean City behind for good.
Warnings: themes of loss/grief, mentions of death of a parent, dom!jungkook, dom/sub themes, spanking, squirting, unprotected sex, oral sex (f recieving).
Rating: Mature.
A/N: Hello loves! HAPPY JK DAY!! This fic is a lil celebration of our golden boy Jungkook so I hope you enjoy!! This whole fic is sickeningly fluffy and reads like a pretentious YA novel but ya girl wrote this while she was stuck in quarantine a few weeks ago and I debated not posting this bc I lowkey love it lowkey hate it so pleasedonthateme if it’s bad LOL. Also -- just incase you haven’t read the warnings already there is a running theme that deals with the loss of a parent (a topic very close to my heart, hence why this piece was especially healing to write.) so reader discretion is advised if that is triggering to you in any way shape or form!!!! P.P.S Largely unedited so pls bare with any mistakes!
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Prelude.
You're late for your work shift, you note, as you catch sight of your watch face glaring up at you menacingly from the arm clutching the handle bars of your bike. As if your mood couldn't get any more miserable -- the dreary morning drizzle that falls from the sky and drips icily down the back of your nape was bad enough.
Goddamn, you groan to yourself as you will your feet to pedal ever faster. Now my hair is gonna be frizzy.
It's a Saturday and the theatre where you work always opens earlier at the weekends. You promised you'd be on time today, but yet here you are, speeding down the worn in sandy sidewalks of your seaside town a whole block away when you should've been opening up half an hour ago.
It's a habit of yours, being late. And as hard as you try, you just can't change a habit. But it can't be helped you suppose. Continuity is all you've ever known. That's the thing about living in a tiny seaside town. Things never change.
The view from your bedroom window has been the same for as long as you can remember — Ocean City — Aka, block after block of rainbow coloured houses with flaky paint leading up to the harbour where boats bob nonchalantly and fishermen reel in their catches beneath the gull filled sky. Beyond it the beach; greyish rolling waves and upturned pebbles nestled atop of hard sand in the winter and clear water and brightly coloured beach towels and brave surfers in the summer.
Nobody ever leaves, and the tourists that arrive in summer never stay. Life becomes a predictable practice, just each day lived out to the next in an endless cycle of never ending continuity. It's suffocating and endless and sometimes you feel like you're just a pawn on a giant chess board, destined to move one agonising square forward at a time, never diagonally. It's hard to change directions when you've been taught to stick to what you know.
You didn't always live here, in this town of continuity. You lived in the big city for a while, where no day was the same as another. But after your mother died you and your older brother were shipped off to live with your dad, who wouldn't know the definition of adapting if it hit him square in the face. He's always been the same square shouldered, balding dude in his forties who never wanted kids and never quite got over losing your mother to the big buck actor she ran off with when you were two.
So that's how you ended up here. Late for work at your job in the country's most prized vacation spot. And your boring reality.
You roll past the beach huts on the shoreline that alternate between vibrant pink and muted blue, barely paying attention to the boardwalk with its little boat house that stretches out into the horizon like a crooked finger. When it gets dark, you can spot the pier carnival lights flashing in the distance from here as they dance across the reflection of the pale white moon and play among the waves.
Even now, the yellow lights of the ornate street lamps that line the water's front shine like tiger's eyes against the sky just like they always have when you turn down the familiar route that takes you past the winding lanes of trinket shops and the happy hour bars and the carnival that feels strangely empty at such an early hour, not a single rollercoaster ride in operation.
Before long you're skidding to a stop outside of the The Crestmont, the old theatre where you work. It's everything you'd expect from a vintage cinema; pink and blue neon lights and a gold trimmed ticket booth out front with a three-sided marquee that extends from the front of the building like a brightly lit airport runway. You hurry beneath it, grateful for the protection it provides from the rain that has started to come down in lashes now, before heading over to the rack around the back of the building where you can chain your bike.
The Crestmont used to be somewhat of a hotspot back in the day or so your told, but these days it only shows cartoons at a discounted price for the neighbourhood kids and the occasional local production of some worn out musical everyone has seen a hundred times before. It's lost all it's magic, everyone says. But you disagree; you probably spend more time here than anyone, and there's magic in every inch of this place.
From the red velvet curtains to the grand chandelier, The Crestmont is one of a kind. Sometimes you disappear into the theatre by yourself for a while unbeknownst to your manager. You can almost taste the laughter and the tears and the love that has been spilled and shared unapologetically amongst these seats. Pure magic.
Your mom left a piece of herself here, too. If you close your eyes you can hear her laughter spilling out into the theatre, or her lilting singing voice filling every nook and cranny like a haunting siren. She was the Crestmont's star. Ocean City's sweetheart.
There's a wall of fame in the lobby. It's covered in portraits crested with gold frames, all filled with pictures of the Crestmont's greatest performers. You've spent hours there — (turns out it's the perfect hiding spot from your manager) — fingers tracing the plaques beneath each one, all inscribed with names that townsfolk whisper with dreamy looks in their eyes. Some are black and white, some colour, but all of them depict pretty faces with beaming smiles that never seem to fade.
Not even your mom's. Her smile is pearly and bright, right above the plaque with her birthdate. And her death date.
And right there at the end, an empty frame. Your frame. You can feel it. You already know how you'll pose for your picture. Hair over one shoulder, hand on hip, smile so convincing that it'll be like every happiness in your heart is written right across your forehead proudly, and you won't have to dull it any longer.
You finish hooking a chain around the handlebars of your bike, catching sight of your reflection in the darkened windows. Staring back at you is a girl dressed in a maroon v-neck with a preppy dicky bow tied around her collar. You frown. The white shirt itches and the high waisted pants make your crotch look weird but the uniform is compulsory. The only thing uglier is the sour expression on your face, which you try to smooth out with your thumb, experimenting with plastering a sickly smile to your face instead. It might be convincing if your lips didn't strain and your eyes weren't so prone to rolling without your permission.
You need to learn to hide your emotions, your father said. You have your feelings written across your face. Customers don't like that.
It's true; customer's didn't usually like you, your unforgiving face or when you spilled cola down their blouse or spat in their popcorn. One more complaint and you were on the path to being fired once and for all, and although in some ways you would be glad to say goodbye to the stupid slushie machine that always gets stuck and the ungrateful customers and the goddamn uniform, you can't loose this job.
Not when it's your ticket to making it big. Then customers will point to your picture as they pass and clutch their chest with a snide superiority, Oh! Can you believe she served me a cola once? I always knew she was gonna make it! instead of Would it kill you to smile a little, honey?
So you swallow a sigh and make your smile as convincing as possible and march inside of the ornate theatre doors of The Crestmont, hoping that today may be the day where things finally change for once.
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Where it begins
"I'm going to work!" You call as you you pull a baseball cap down over your hair to cover it's unbrushed wildness. "I won't be back for a while so don't wait up, okay Taehyung?"
You pause with your hand on the door, listening carefully for a response; the small house you live in pulsates with the bass of some indie rock album your brother and his friends are obsessed with at the moment, and your eyes roll when you peer up the staircase and find Taehyung's bedroom door firmly closed like always.
With a shake of your head you scribble out a message on a sticky note — GONE 2 WORK. — and leave it for him to read when he eventually emerges from his man cave in search of sustenance and finds you gone.
You brush away the funny ache that nestles in your stomach. This is nothing new. You're used to not being heard. Your dad is always gone for trips you suspect involve more play than work, and your older brother pretends he's not broken by hanging around with the neighbourhood cool kids and barraging himself in his room for days on end. Despite living under one roof it feels as though you're miles apart, an invisible barrier separating you indefinitely.
You weren't always like this; distant, always stepping on eggshells around each other. You were a family once. A happy one. But since the accident there's been an absence in this house, and nothing has been the same since.
Still, you know that beneath Taehyung's standoffish persona, he's still your big brother. He worries about you. So you tack the note to the fridge and make your way outside.
The lawn is already brown despite it only being late May, and summer is shaping up to be hot and sticky, though you live two blocks away from the beach so the coolness of the ocean still thankfully pervades against your perspiring skin, the gulls already calling you with their high pitched squaks from down at the shoreline.
You've barely made it to the end of the drive before there's the sound of knuckles rapping against glass. You look up and your heart jumps into your mouth. Staring back at you is a pair of dark eyes from behind the upstairs windowpane. Even from this distance you can see how they shine, deep and dark like a cup of black coffee, and you'd recognise the annoyingly cute smirk that matches them anywhere.
Jungkook. Jeon Jungkook. Taehyung's best friend, and, unfortunately, your crush for as long as you knew what the word love meant.
"Hey, Y/N!" Your heart sinks when the window slides open and a messy head of brown hair sticks out through the gap and points at you with a pout. "You're leaving already? Without me?"
Oh; another thing about Jeon Jungkook. He's also your co-worker, which means you spend 16 hours a week in his company, much to the glee of your heart and the dismay of your conscience.
You weren't exactly surprised when you turned up to the Crestmont theatre for your first shift and were left in the capable hands of none other than Jungkook to teach you the ins and the outs of the popcorn machine and the ticket booth.
For as long as you've known him he's been somewhat of a film buff. He practically grew up holding a camera. You always used watch him and your brother making home movies in the backyard, fit with ketchup sachets for blood and endless costumes from your mom's closet. And the one time you stayed at his house when your dad went away for a while after the accident, you saw all the classic movie posters on his bedroom wall; Casablanca, Singing in the Rain, Jaws. So it made total sense for Jungkook to be at the Crestmont. In fact, you couldn't imagine him anywhere else.
That day you were mostly just surprised that he knew who you were at all. While you had spent years watching him from your bedroom window while he kicked a ball around with Taehyung or avoiding his eyes at the table when he stayed for dinner, he had never so much as glanced in your direction.
Deep down you think the reason he was so quick to take you under his wing is because he knew first hand how hard the accident hit your family. You suppose he feels he owes it to Taehyung to keep you in high spirits.
Although if you weren't you and he wasn't him, you'd swear Jungkook's attentions had become almost flirtatious as of late. He always goes the extra mile to spend time with you, and you even though you know it'll end up with you getting hurt you can't bring yourself to stop him.
You see, Jungkook has a gift for subtle charm. Like how he always sneaks you sodas out back on your lunch break, never forgetting the extra syrup — tooth rottingly sweet just how you like it — slipping one of his own dollars into the cash register to avoid a telling off from your manager. Or how he insists on helping you clean up after the theatre is empty, showing you the best secret places like down the back off seats to find misplaced trinkets and the creaky floorboard where your manager hides his cigarettes. How he insists on walking you home after the evening shift, even if he says he's going this way to see Taehyung anyway.
You've spent countless hours pondering over whether his sweet talking words mean as much to him as they do to you. And as much as you know it's unlikely for someone like Jeon Jungkook to ever have feelings for you, you can't help the way your heart speeds up every time he shoots you one of his signature bunny smiles that light up his whole face like he's happiness personified. And you can't bring yourself to hate him for it.
"I did call," you respond matter of factly, finally sucking in a breath of courage to turn around and squint up at him through the afternoon sun with a shrug. "But that trash you're listening too was too loud for you guys to hear me."
Jungkook's eyes widen as he fumbles around beneath the windowsill and pops up again holding up a shiny vinyl record sleeve. You recognise it instantly; it's from his favourite film — Submarine. He hardly ever shuts up about it.
"This is not trash. This is, like, the best movie soundtrack ever made!" He shakes his head as he takes the needle off of Taehyung's vintage record player, music ceasing with a scratch, and slips it into the sleeve with a grin. "Good thing I have it downloaded so we can listen to it on the way to work, hm?"
You roll your eyes and tap your foot impatiently, and at that, Taehyung appears behind him.
"You're leaving already?" He frowns, words directed at Jungkook even as he glances through narrowed eyes at you stood awkwardly on the front lawn.
"Yup. My shift starts in twenty." Jungkook shrugs, disappearing into the room for a second before he emerges again with a backpack slung over his shoulder. "Sorry dude. I can come back afterwards though, if you want?"
Taehyung purses his lips. Even from here you can see the stress lines embedded in his forehead that make him look older than his humble age of nineteen, somehow weak unlike how you always saw him as a kid. Big and strong; untouchable; your brother.
His blunt eyes never quite meet Jungkook's as he shakes his head softly. "'S good. I was gonna try and sleep, anyway, before the sun goes down. Didn't get much shut eye last night. Not with the..."
Nightmares. Taehyung trails off, but you know that's what he's alluding to. The nightmares that turn your big strong brother into a sniffling mess in the dead of night, kicking around mercilessly until you sneak into his bed and whisper to him until he slips into slumber again. Not that you ever acknowledge it in the morning over your bowls of cereal and vacant good morning's.
"Okay." Jungkook's face momentarily falls; a rare occurrence from the boy who seems to be perpetually cheerful. He pats Taehyung on the shoulder gently. "Take care of yourself, okay man?"
Taehyung just nods, letting out a yawn as he rolls into a stretch. "See ya tomorrow."
You're jolted from your thoughts when Jungkook throws his left leg out of the window, then the other, arms bulging in just the right way where they poke out of the sleeves of his plain white tee as he climbs down the drainpipe and lands with a thump on the soles of his high top sneakers.
"Hey kiddo." He grins as he wipes the palms of his hands on the thighs of his ripped jeans, before messing up your hair despite your groan of protest.
"Don't call me that. You're only a year older than me."
You're startled when you meet the pair of warm eyes that glint golden brown in the summer evening light, chest contracting as you look away and break into a fast walk towards the street.
"And you know you can just use the front door right?"
You hear him snort behind you, neglecting to use the front gate and instead launching over the fence so he lands directly in front of you on the sidewalk.
"How am I supposed to impress my best friends little sister if I can't show off my guns?" He flexes his arm, but you just brush past him with a roll of your eyes.
"You're an idiot."
You hear the clunk of his bike chain unhooking from the gate, before a set of wheels pedal up on the sidewalk beside you. "Hey! Where are you going?"
"Uh, to work?" You offer bluntly, squinting at him through the sun. "You should be too, we start in fifteen minutes."
"I mean why are you walking? What happened to your bike?"
You roll your eyes. "Some tourist kids slashed the wheels at the beach."
"Shit. Really?" Jungkook tuts, but you don't miss the glint in his eye as he nods towards the pegs on the back of his bike that were made for carrying a passenger."Then I guess it's my lucky day. Hop on, we can ride together."
You come to a standstill, arms crossed tightly. "I'd rather walk."
"Oh come on!" He wiggles his eyebrows. "It'll take double the time if we go on foot, and I recall it being you who got a final late warning last week."
"If we go on foot?" You laugh breathily, determined to stand your ground. "Just go on ahead, I'm good here."
"Well, I'm not exactly going to leave you here alone on the side of the road now am I? So I'll be forced to walk with you. And I'm older than you remember? Look, I'm already out of breath! My legs aren't what they used to be, y'know."
"Fine!" With a pout you take the helmet resting in his front basket and hook it underneath your chin, biting your lip to stop a smile from gracing your lips at the excitement that lights up Jungkook's features. "But only because I want you to shut up."
"Your wish is my command." He says with a pat to your head. "Hold on tight, okay?"
And as you wrap your arms around his waist, you're sure his ears heat up a deep shade of red, even it could just be the evening light playing tricks on you.
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The theatre at the Crestmont feels eerily quiet when its empty.
You know that because even though your shift was supposed to end at 5, you offered to stick around to help clean up after today's performance. Phantom of the Opera.
"Jesus," You groan as you pick up another sticky soda cup that someone had kindly spilled all over the ground for you to clean up, dropping the offender into a black trash bag. "Doesn't anyone around here know how to use a trash can?"
You fall into one of the theatre seats with a sigh and run your fingers over the scarlet velvet, worn yet plush, the texture soothing you instantly. You tilt your head back and let the silence engulf you. No orchestra, no musical numbers, no stage crew shouting directions. No whirring cotton candy machine. Just you and the stage.
From here you can see every detail on the high ceiling littered with renaissance-style paintings of mermaids and babies armed with heart shaped bow and arrows. Your mom was an actress. When you were a kid you used to spent hours staring at them while she rehearsed. You were convinced they came alive once the theatre closed up for the night, their cheeky smiles evidence of a secret only you knew.
A trail of rainbows is cast by the grand chandelier hung in the center, and it draws your attention all the way down the aisles and up to the stage.
The Crestmont is only small, fitting perhaps 200 people at most. It's hardly Broadway. But the fire in your chest ignites as you glance side to side before sidling up the creaking wooden steps that wind up to the Crestmont's center stage. Your favourite part of the whole theatre.
It's not the first time you've done this. You often like to come up here after everyone has gone home, even though you technically aren't supposed to. There's a certain magic about being alone up here as you collect the lone roses that were thrown on stage by tonight's audience. Breathing in the musty smell of butter popcorn that lingers on the velvet curtains, feel the warmth of the bright stage lights glazing your skin. Something about it feels like home.
The first time you ever saw the Crestmont stage was on tv, watching a grainy camera shakily capture your mom in the very same spot you find yourself right now.
Your mom used to have a cardboard box filled with her old audition tapes. Everything from Hamlet to A Streetcar Named Desire, she'd starred in it, and you spent hours together in front of the television set trying to memorise the way she spoke your favourite lines and listening to her lilting voice recite backstage anecdotes about her rendezvous with foreign directors who dined on her in Paris or underground parties with celebrities you had never even heard of as she stroked your hair.
It wasn't until you got a little older that you realised that, just like you, your mom was a dreamer. Sure, she'd visited a couple different states and starred in some makeup commercials once, and that was enough to make her a celebrity in a town as small as this.
But really? She was just a small town actress with dreams larger than herself and way larger than the Crestmont where she made her name. And suddenly the gaps in time where she would disappear for weeks — sometimes months — on end no longer made sense to you. If she wasn't drinking cocktails with the prince of Monaco or clubbing in London, then where was she?
"Down town with those no good roadies," Taehyung told you once. "They made all these empty promises. Told her she'd make it big if she just did what they said. But look how that turned out."
That was the day you realised your mom was a better actress than you ever knew.
She always thought that her dreams would come true. She believed it so hard that you believed it too, naively. But who knows? Maybe they would have if she didn't get into an accident on her way to New York for her big break.
It's easy to imagine how your mom felt up here. She always looked so alive and free in those VHS tapes as she danced effortlessly across the stage with an ethereal weightlessness, the theatre silent except for the melodic sweetness of her monologues that drew tears to the eyes of those who listened eagerly.
If you close your eyes you can hear the roar of the crowd, hands clapping furiously. The orchestra tuning their brass in the pit, bows melodic against strings. Flowers landing at your feet. The deep breath of satisfaction as you take your final bow and the curtain closes.
Just like that you're moving across the stage, reciting the lines you know so well...
"You're gonna be a star like me some day," A voice whispers against your ear, soft and gentle. A memory. Your mom. "Just like me."
And just like that, she's there. In the audience, clapping. For you. And you feel invincible.
The sound of applause breaks you out of your trance. Real applause. You find yourself stood center stage, broom in hand, staring out at row after row of empty seats that gape with the same emptiness that was here when you arrived.
Except one of the velvet lined seats is filled now. Right at the front.
"Encore!" Jungkook whistles, the harsh thwacks of his palms clapping together clanging inside your ears. "Do it again! That was amazing!"
Your chest seizes painfully, a sudden bout of panic turning your blood cold. You feel the colour leave your face. How long has he been here? How long has he been watching?
Jungkook is watching you attentively, eyes soft at the edges with wonder. It makes bile rise in your throat. You can't be up here. Not when there's a pair of eyes looking at you, judging.
"I..." You begin, but the words get caught in your throat.
"I can't do this."
The way Jungkook's eyes widen and he lurches forward to catch you is the last thing you see before your vision goes black.
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The boardwalk is strangely quiet for a summer evening. It's happy hour so you suppose most vacationers are already in the bars in their I LOVE OCEAN CITY T-shirts drinking cocktails or whatever. Not that you're complaining.
The smell of hotdogs and vinegar from the vans that line the strip still fill the air, snatches of conversations from children begging their parents to let them go on the waltzer one last time barely audible above the tinkling bells of the carousel. The ride operators drink soda's as they fan themselves with rolled up newspapers, grateful for the gentle hubbub on such a sticky evening, and then there's you, caught up in the middle of it all.
The wooden boards of the pier are warm against he backs of your thighs. You're sat with your legs dangling through the peeling guard rail that lines the strip. It was painted pastel blue at some point but years of sea spray and grubby hands made it fade to a sickly green tinge that matches the ocean.
Speaking of, the ocean would usually be directly below your feet, murky and wild, but today the tide has receded right back to reveal a large strip of sand. The stands suspending the pier rest on top of it so that you could walk right under and around them if you wanted to. You and Taehyung used to do that all the time when you were kids. Searching for barnacles. Exploring the dark places.
"Here. Eat up. You totally passed out on me back there. You could probably do with some sugar."
The soft voice beside you is the only thing loud enough to permeate your daydreams. You don't have look up to know who it belongs to. Jungkook.
He peers down at you, sun beating down against his back. He's holding two vanilla ice cream cones, double scooped, and he thrusts one into your hands before mirroring your position at the edge of the boardwalk.
The walk down here from the Crestmont was more or less silent, and your stomach twists now you realise Jungkook wants to talk.
"What are you thinking about?"
"Nothing." You lie. The ice cream is cold and sweet and covers the bitterness. "I just think it's funny."
Jungkook's tongue sneaks out to lick up the melted cream dribbling down his cone. "What is?"
"How this place stays the same but I feel so different." You were born here, raised here. This place was your whole life once, with it's salty air and bustling casino's. But since the accident, something's been bubbling inside you, swelling and crashing like the ocean below that taunts you and you've never felt farther from home in your life as you do now, looking out over the town that just won't budge, just like the funny ache in your chest. "Forget I said it. I don't know why I'm even telling you this."
Jungkook fidgets beside you and runs a hand through his hair with a sigh."It's okay, y'know. To miss her."
Your mom. You know that's who he means. Just the mention of her stings.
"Mhm." You snort. "Tell that to my family. If we all carried on missing mom then we'd be in pretty hot shit by now."
"If it's Taehyung you're worried about, then don't be. He's stronger than he looks."
"Until he's not anymore. And we lose him again just like—" You pause. You hate how you can hear the pain in your voice so you smooth it out. "Just like before. And I can't let that happen. I won't."
Jungkook shifts. As Taehyung's oldest friend he was there for everything in the aftermath of the accident. He was there when you put on a brave face for the sake of your family. He was there when Taehyung couldn't be any more.
"That doesn't mean you have to be strong all the time. Think about it this way. The ocean isn't always this calm right?" He gazes wistfully out over the ocean that swells and crashes against the shore, fingers twirling the gold chain around his neck. "Last winter when we had that huge storm, the waves were so big they smashed right through the pier support beams."
You furrow your brows. "What about it?"
"The ocean was just too much for the pier to bare and it would've come crashing down forever if half the neighborhood didn't come down to the beach in the dead of night, despite the rain, and hold it together until the storm calmed and the emergency repair boats could get to shore."
It's true. You remember how unforgiving the rain was as it pelted down against your back and froze you through to the bone that night as each and every familiar face from your neighborhood came down to the seafront to lend a hand, your family included.
Jungkook was there too. He was the one who knocked on your door in the early hours to spread the word. He got given free churros for life by one of the pier stall owners as a reward.
"What I'm trying to say Y/N, is that Taehyung has you to lean on, right? So who do you have?" Jungkook says, staring at you head on now. His sincerity almost makes you blush.
You bite your lip. Deep down you know that your beams are just as broken as Taehyung's and it's only a matter of time before they come crashing down into the water, and this time there'll be nobody to hold the pieces together.
"I don't need anyone. I'm just fine on my own. I can handle my ocean."
Jungkook brushes your hand. You flinch, so he pulls it back into his lap. "Well if you ever need a life boat, then you know where I am okay?"
You don't believe him, but he's staring at you so expectantly that you just tell him what he wants to hear. You're good at that.
"Okay." You whisper. "Okay."
Children's laughter bubbles up from the beach. You watch their distant silhouettes dancing among the waves. It's Jungkook who breaks the silence before it settles between you and becomes uncomfortable.
"Anyway, what were you doing up there on the stage today?" He smiles, like he's trying to lighten the mood. "You looked like you were having the time of your life before—"
You feel your cheeks start to burn. How long had Jungkook been watching you at the Crestmont? Had he seen the whole thing?
"It was nothing. I was just being dumb."
"Nothing?" Jungkook cocks his head to the side and punches you playfully. "It didn't seem like nothing."
"It just...it makes me feel close to my mom when I'm on the stage." You admit. "I loved watching her when I was a kid. She was always larger than life in my eyes. She had this way of making you really believe she was someone else. It was like she wasn't just acting -- she was becoming. Sometimes...sometimes I think I liked her better when she was in character."
You shake your head with a small smile. "I like me better when I'm in character. I used to dream about going to New York one day and becoming an actress just like she wanted to. Small town girl making it big in the city and all that." You scoff. "But I'm nothing like her. It's just fun to pretend sometimes."
"You're good. At performing. Like, really good." Jungkook's eyes are wide. When he places a hand on your forearm you don't shake it off this time. "You take after her. Everyone says it."
It's true. There's one photo of your mom in the house. It's in Taehyung's room. When you were younger you thought it was your face staring back at you from behind the glass. Sometimes you'll be walking down the boardwalk or serving soda's at work and you'll hear the whispers. See their heads turn. Is it her?
"Pfft. Looks mean nothing." You scoff. "She was fearless. I can't even speak in front of one person without passing out, let alone a crowd."
Realisation crosses Jungkook's face. "Oh. So that's what happened back there? Stage fright?"
"Uh huh." You roll your eyes. "So don't give me the follow your dreams spiel or whatever."
"Hmm." Jungkook uses his arms as a makeshift pillow so he can lay back against the ground. You mirror him, peering through your fingers to watch how the golden rays of the sun swallow his frame. "Remember that play they made us do in middle school?"
"The Nativity?" You raise your eyebrow. It was the first theatre production you were in, before the accident and way before you had stage fright.
"Yeah." He grins. "I was the sheep. Taehyung made fun of me for months afterwards because of that stupid costume my grandma made."
"Yeah." You snort. "You did look sorta dumb."
Jungkook bumps your arm with a playful pout that makes you giggle. "And do you remember how I forgot my lines on stage and nearly pissed myself with stage fright? God, I still remember how mad my dad looked in the front row. We'd practiced that part for weeks. I don't know why it happened. I just froze—" A small smile forms on his lips. "But you didn't. Next thing I know there's a kid in a gold star of Bethlehem costume running on stage to recite my lines for me. You stole the show, remember that? Everyone loved you."
"That was then." You murmur, but you can't suppress the smile tugging at the corners or your mouth. "I'm not the same person."
"You were a year younger than the rest of my class but you auditioned anyway, because you knew that you were the only person who could play the star. Because you were a star."
Jungkook turns so that his head rests on his elbow and you're suddenly so close you can feel his breath ghost across your cheek. Your heart pumps in your ears as you gaze dips down to his rosy lips and back up to his sparkling eyes which bore into yours.
"You still are a star."
The words echo in your ears, soft and sincere. His tongue snakes out to wet his lips. You lose your breath. And then you jump away, placing a safe distance between your bodies before you can do something you regret.
"And what about you. Are you still a sheep?" You tease, turning your face so he can't see how it burns rosy red.
"Nah. Figured out pretty quickly after that that I was better off behind the camera." He chuckles.
"Oh right. You still have that thing?" You nod to the camera in his lap. It's one of those old ones that looks like the type that needs a film reel and a projector, but it's been modified so there's a little viewfinder at the side to check the footage instead. "Can I see?"
"What?" Jungkook blinks.
"Some of the stuff you've filmed?"
"Oh! Right!" It's his turn to flush now, scratching the back of his neck as he anxiously thrusts the camera into your hands and pays close attention to the hangnail at the edge of his thumb as you watch the footage.
Your eyes widen when a familiar scene rolls out on the tiny screen. You, on stage at the Crestmont. Jungkook filmed you.
"This is..."
"You." He rushes."Yeah, I know. Sorry if this is awkward—"
"No. Not at all. I just—" You watch in awe as the you inside the camera moves across the stage with an effortless grace. How the lights make your eyes shine and your skin brighter than you remember it being in the mirror this morning. "How did you do that?"
Jungkook's forehead creases. "Do what?"
"Make me look like...that."
"I didn't do anything." Jungkook shrugs. "That's just how I see you."
You could listen to him say that all day, but you stop yourself mid swoon.
"Don't say things you don't mean."
"I do mean it. And I'll show you." He wiggles his eyebrows.
"How?"
He grabs your hand and squeezes it. Tight. "I don't know how yet but I will."
You roll your eyes. "Good luck, Jeon."
"You know I like a challenge." Jungkook laughs, and the melodic sound goes right to your chest. "I'll make you see yourself how I see you. Just wait."
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"Since when did you have four wheels?" You call to Jungkook with a quirk of your brow, resting your elbows on the window ledge of the beat up truck he pulls up in outside the Crestmont.
It's a sticky August afternoon and the rusty red vehicle purrs— or more like splutters — in the parking lot as Jungkook untangles your bike from the rack and lifts it into the cargo bed like it's weightless. Just yesterday he came by with his pump and a patch to fix that goddamn slashed tyre, and now he's stealing it?
"Hey! What are you doing with my bike?"
He is clad in nothing but a white vest and board shorts, and you can see perspiration glimmering at his temples as the salty breeze blowing from the beach ruffles the dark curls that flop over his forehead.
"This is my dad's truck," His eyes flash with pride as he hops into the open drivers side door and makes the engine growl. He nods to the empty seat beside him and pushes his dark round sunglasses down the bridge of his nose, fanning his face with his hands. "And you won't be needing your bike today. Now hurry up and get in, loser. I've been waiting ages for your shift to finish and the AC is broken."
You raise a brow. "We're going somewhere?"
"Yeah. Why else would I be waiting for you to get in my truck?"
"I mean, we're going somewhere in this?" You nod towards the truck's worn tires, the fumes that wisp from the exhaust pipe like a lit cigar. "Are you sure it's safe?"
Jungkook notices the way you bite your lip. You don't even have to tell him the worries that are running through your mind. It's as if he can read them like an open book.
"Are you still scared of riding in cars?" He questions, softly.
You nod. That's what an accident does to someone. Makes them scared of something they ordinarily wouldn't even question.
"A little." The breeze ruffles your hair and you hide behind it. "I'm getting better." You add, so he doesn't feel bad because you know he does. His face tells you as much.
"It's a short drive, if that helps." He rushes. "And I asked Taehyung and he said you'd be okay, but if you aren't then I can just walk you home—"
"No." You shake your head firmly. There's a funny fizzing in your stomach that's been there ever since that day on the boardwalk, and it's only growing stronger and stronger now you're inches away from Jungkook and his warm eyes and gentle smile. You don't want it to end just yet. It's enough to outweigh the wriggling fear that's always inside you just a little. "Where are we going?"
Jungkook's face lights up and your heart flips when you realise it's because of you.
"I told you I was gonna make you see what I see, didn't I?"
"Oh that was today?" You tease. "Must have missed it it in the calendar."
"Stop asking questions! Just get in. Please?"
"Fine." You walk around to the passenger door, sliding in beside him and throwing your bag into the back seat. "But I need to be home by midnight or Taehyung will worry."
"No problemo." Jungkook salutes as he switches on the engine and the truck roars to life. You clasp your hands tightly in your lap and breathe through your nose. You're okay. You're safe."Home by midnight. It's a promise."
You gaze out of the window to stop your thoughts from running wild. Jungkook turns left, away from town and the beach and everything familiar. You watch it get smaller and smaller in the mirrors, strangely relieved. Strangely excited.
"Now will you tell me where we're going?" You ask.
"Nope." Jungkook chuckles when you pout. "Just sit back. Relax. Take in the view. Listen to the music."
He leans across the dash, making a point to keep his eyes on the road as he fiddles with the stereo. A familiar string of guitar chords fill the truck. You recognise them, even if vaguely. Probably from Taehyung's vast collection of records.
"The Beatles right?" You ask, resting your chin on your knee as you dare to take a peek at him, blushing when you find him already staring at you.
"Pfft, yeah. Of course it's The Beatles! Only their greatest soundtrack, like, ever."
You shrug. "I've never listened to them before, so I wouldn't know."
"Oh come on? You haven't seen A Hard Day's Night?" His eyes widen when you shake your head. "Super Fly? Pulp Fiction? Purple Rain?"
You stifle a giggle at the look of pure shock he's sending you. "Nope. Should I have?"
"Absolutely!" He splutters. Passion shines in his eyes. "You're missing out on some of the greatest cinematography known to man!"
"I guess you have a lot to fill me in on, then."
"I sure do." His eyes soften. "Open the glove box."
You open it. Inside you find an assortment of cassette tapes, old and new. You send him a curious look.
"Close your eyes and choose one." He nods. "Go on."
You do as he says and shut your lids tightly, feeling around until your fingers curl around a tape you're strangely drawn to. When you open your eyes you find a worn box in your palm, yellow at the edges, and you're momentarily disappointed until Jungkook hums in approval beside you.
"Good choice! Dirty Dancing. A classic." He takes it from you and slides the tape into the stereo. It crackles a little before the music starts. "Trust me, you'll love it."
The stereo tracklist flashes amber. 01: Do You Love Me?
"You broke my heart 'cause I couldn't dance," Jungkook sings along in a deep voice, eyebrows bouncing as you loll your head to the side to send him an eye roll. "And now I'm back to let you know I can really shake 'em down!"
The song starts, all vibrant guitar and drums. It has a funky 60's groove, like it belongs in a swing dancing club instead of on the highway at sunset. It's a happy song and you think it suits Jungkook just right.
Speaking of Jungkook, he starts to bob his head in time with the beat, fingertips tapping in rhythm against the steering wheel. He looks adorably dorky, losing himself to the song, like he's forgotten you're even sat beside him.
"You look like an idiot." You deadpan, though you can't cover the laugh that escapes you as he sings along louder.
"No, I look like I'm having fun!" Jungkook rolls down the window and turns up the music so loud he has to shout for you to hear him. "Don't you ever do this? Just give in to the music for a while? Let your body do what it wants?"
"Uh, no. I prefer to just listen." You shout back. "Besides, your body should be focused on driving this car right now--"
"Oh come on! Just try it."
"Try it?" You blink, stomach suddenly knotting."Like now? In front of you?"
"Well duh. Look. Copy me."
He starts to shake his shoulders from side to side, fingers clicking as he nods for you to do the same.
"I...okay." You start to copy, but you catch yourself in the rear view mirror and you just look stiff compared to how effortlessly Jungkook moves to the rhythm.
"See you're doing it!" Jungkook grins, throwing his head back. "Feels good huh?"
"Kinda..." You have to admit there is something liberating about just letting go. "Like this?"
Your knees volunteer themselves to the beat, and then your arms, and before you know it you've got your eyes closed, hair whipping around your face as you speed down the interstate
"That's it. Feel the music!"
Before you know it, the song ends and you realise all at once that you're laughing. Loud and free, enough to make your belly hurt. Jungkook is too, the sound better than any song you've ever heard, and neither of you can seem to stop.
"Oh my god." You pant, covering your face with your fingers, embarrassed. "Now we both look like idiots."
"Don't hide from me." Jungkook bites his lip. You're suddenly aware of how close he is. His arms grab your wrists, pulling them away from your face, but he doesn't drop the one closest to him. Instead he links your fingers and uses your shared grip to change the gear as he turns down a winding road.
"I'm shy." You say, and you can feel the heat in your cheeks.
"Why? You're beautiful." Jungkook puts the car into park. You realise all at once that you've been driving for ages and you didn't even panic once. "Besides, we've arrived. And you're not gonna wanna miss seeing this."
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The destination Jungkook seems so excited about turns out to be a concrete parking lot.
"Where are we, Jungkook?" You ask, looking around but finding nothing but tyre tracks and dirt.
Jungkook has already hopped out of the drivers side, sliding over the hood of the car to tug open your door with a quirk of his brow.
He holds out his palm, upturned and calloused. "Do you trust me?"
You bite your lip, heart pounding. Do you trust him?
Your body speaks for you and you slide your hand into his. His thumb traces your knuckles reassuringly.
"Yes." You breathe. "I trust you."
"Good."
You yelp when an arm wraps around your waist and hoists you out of the car, tightly interlocked fingers blocking your vision like a makeshift blindfold. "Don't open your eyes until I tell you to."
"Okay." You giggle, feet stumbling as you try to find your balance with the help of a sturdy hand beneath your elbow.
Jungkook hums gently beneath his breath as he guides you up a path that turns from concrete to loose rock to dampened grass beneath the soles of your beat up sneakers. There's a voice in the back of your mind that tells you to be nervous; who knows where he could be taking you right now.
But as you breathe in the musty notes of his cologne and feel your heart flutter in your chest when he comes to a stop and rests his chin on your shoulder, just close enough to feel his laugh ghost across your neck, you don't care where in the world you are right now as long as it's beside him.
"Now, open."
The sun is startlingly bright when you open your eyes for the first time and see the vibrant meadow that stretches as far as you can see.
Wait — that's not the sun. It's sunflowers. Clusters of them, cheerfully waving with the breeze from where you stand on the path that continues for a few steps before it disappears among their stems.
The sunflowers are a burst of golden colour against the fading green of the meadow, and the horizon beyond that which boasts the silhouette of beach rock against the soft blue of the ocean at sunset. There's tracks here and there where the uncut grass is trampled, like some children had played hide and seek.
You reach out a hand and brush your fingertips over the velvety petals; breathe in the botanical scent of the fresh sunny blooms that dances through the meadow. It's breathtaking, you think. There's no coordination, just freedom choreographed by the wind as the tall stems sway back and forth in their gentle dance.
Before you know it you've taken off into a run, grinning with childlike glee when the tall grass tickles your nose and the sun whispers against your neck.
"Jungkook, this place is—"
"Beautiful right?" You nod breathlessly, blushing deeply when you come to a stop and find him staring right at you. He squeezes your hand and that's when you notice your fingers are still interlinked. "I come here a lot. When I need to think."
"How did you find this place?"
"Taehyung and I stumbled upon it a few summers ago by accident." He says. "Nobody knows about it. It's our secret."
"It's so beautiful." You whisper. "The whole world needs to see this."
Jungkook kicks at a stone with the toe of his boot. "I kinda like it being a secret. This place...is special to me."
"Then why...." The words get caught in your throat. You swallow and try again. "Why did you bring me here?"
"I wanted to show you the things I find most beautiful. Remember?"
"The sunflowers?"
"Well yeah..." He scratches the back of his neck. Swallows thickly, like he's preparing himself. "But I was thinking of something a little different..."
You close your eyes, a smile appearing on your lips as you let the crisp breeze caress your face. "Then what?"
There's a sharp click of a shutter, and when your lashes flutter open in surprise, Jungkook is shaking a Polaroid picture back and forth, his eyes glinting with something mischievous.
"Hey! Give me that—" You reach for the Polaroid, stomach churning with a sudden shyness that makes you hug your arms.
"Just — don't do that okay?" He holds it out of reach, pleading with his eyes. "Please."
"Do what?"
"Give up on what makes you happy just because you're scared." His palm cups your cheek. "You said it yourself. Being in front of the camera is where you belong. Don't you see that?"
"I'm not scared." You feel the heat rise in your cheeks when Jungkook sends you a knowing look. "Okay maybe I am scared. And so what if I am? You've already given me the face your fears spiel and I told you. I'm perfectly happy avoiding every camera known to man for the rest of my life if it means I never have to face them."
"But you've already faced one of your fears today. You got in my car, remember?" He raises an eyebrow, smug. "Well, two technically, 'cause you're here with me now and I know how nervous you used to get around me--"
"Did not!"
"Do too! Every time we talk outside of work you get all shy and--"
"Shut up."
"See! You're doing it right now!"
You don't know what compels you to do it. Maybe it's the heat rising in the apples of your cheeks or the way your heart quickens when Jungkook closes the gap between you, but before you can stop yourself you're reaching up and grasping his face with both hands.
"Oh just shut up and kiss me, doofus."
The smug smirk on Jungkook's face is replaced with wide eyed surprise, his lips falling still for a moment when yours crash against his. But then his steady hands find your waist and he supports you on your tip toes so he can pull you ever closer, melting into the plush press of your lips.
When you pull back, you're smiling. You can't help it. You've been dreaming of this moment since, like, middle school. And goddamn, he even tastes how you imagined. Like black coffee and toothpaste.
"See." He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear. "Happiness suits you."
"Whatever, Jeon." You smirk. "Don't let it go to your head, but it's thanks to you."
Jungkook flashes you the biggest bunny grin you've ever seen, eyes sparkling at your words.
"Wait...stay like that." He reaches for his camcorder in his backpack and points the lens at you. The smile falls from your lips. You place a hand on his arm, grip tighter than you intended.
"Jungkook stop."
"What's wrong? Just keep smiling like that, the shot was perfect—"
"I don't know what to do." You shrug, the lens boring into you like a judgy aunt at Thanksgiving dinner. "The camera makes me nervous."
"Just pretend I'm not here."
You sniff. "I don't want you to not be here..."
"Listen," Jungkook cups your face, thumbs tracing your cheeks fondly. "The reason I brought you here? It's because this place reminds me of you. Beautiful."
"Jungkook--"
"Just like you said, the world needs to see this place. Just like they need to see you."
"I..." Your heart is on the verge of exploding, you would swear it. "Okay." The word rolls off your tongue before you can stop it because somehow you trust him. And deep down, there's still that fizz of excitement mixing in with all the nervousness. The Jungkook Effect. You don't want to lose it to the darkness like everything else.
"I'll try. Just-- don't laugh at me okay?"
"You have my word, sarge." He salutes with a thoughtful grin. "Hold on a sec. I know exactly what you need to get you going."
Jungkook jumps to his feet and you watch with your chin tucked between your knees as he jogs down the rocky path and opens all four of the truck doors, even the trunk, before his head disappears into the vehicle and the same pumping bass from earlier starts blasting into the quiet serene of the sunflower field.
"There," He grins as he returns, out of breath, and sits back down beside you cross legged, holding his camcorder to his eye. "Now do what you were doing before again, but over there. Just pretend you're on stage at the Crestmont, okay?"
You feel the music wash over you and the urge to move hits you like a wave. Jungkook nods encouragingly and there's something in his eyes that flips a switch inside you. And for the first time in a long time, all the passion and spirit and feeling inside you fizzes up to the top and you can't contain it any longer.
"That's it!" Jungkook calls, shutter clicking uncontrollably. "I knew you could do it!"
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An oak tree provides sun-flecked shade, a cool sanctuary from the sun that sets on the horizon and splashes the sky's canvas magenta.
Jungkook laid out a checkered blanket from the trunk of his truck which you both lay upon, shoulders pressed together as close as humanly possible, surrounded by your devoured picnic consisting of his mom's fruit punch and bags of snacks he took from the concession stand at the Crestmont when nobody was looking.
"Holy shit, Y/N." He says through a mouthful of popcorn, jabbing his finger at his favourite shot of you in front of the sunflowers. "This is what I've been saying! You're a natural in front of the camera."
"No, you're amazing, Jungkook." You feel for his hand. It's funny how natural it feels already when his pinky links with yours. "Behind the camera."
"You think?" He chews his lip, eyes searching yours for approval.
"I know. You should do something with these. People need to see them."
"I'm thinking of becoming a filmographer, actually"
"Like at the pier?" You think of the tacky photo booth that overlooks the sea in town, fit with all the silly cardboard cut outs that tourists come and take a photo with for a dollar.
"No, I mean a real filmographer." He shrugs, and you're sure there's a trace of a blush on his cheeks. "Y'know. Movies and stuff."
You nod. It makes sense for Jungkook to spend his life with a camera glued to his right hand. You can't imagine Jungkook anywhere else, and you have to ignore the sinking feeling that comes with the realisation that he would eventually leave Ocean City -- and you -- behind for the big screen.
"Well you bet your ass I'll be front row to watch each and every one, Jeon Jungkook."
"My lucky star." Jungkook smiles.
"Always."
He must see the sadness brimming inside you, his body shuffling closer so your knees brush. It's reassuring somewhat.
"Actually...there's something I should tell you."
He shifts under your gaze. The nerves rush back. "What is it?"
"I guess I finished writing my first screenplay..."
"That's like a movie script, right?" You ask eagerly, and he nods. "That's great, Kook!"
"Yeah, it's great it's just --" He pauses, and clutches your hand tighter like he's scared what he says next will make you let go forever. "It's about you."
You pale. "M-me?"
"I mean, it's about you and...and Taehyung! And your mom." Jungkook rushes. "I was inspired by your story at the boardwalk and it just happened! I'm sorry, I know you probably hate me now and think I'm crazy but--"
"Burn it." You deadpan.
Jungkook blinks. "W..what?"
"I said burn it." You pull his hand into your lap and he lets out a sigh of relief. "I don't hate you, Kook. I just think you were right earlier when you said I need to face my fears. And the only way I can do that is by forgetting my past. The last thing I need is a whole freaking movie about it."
He joins in with your strained chuckles. "Sure you aren't mad?"
"Not mad." You assure with a smile.
"Then I'll burn it."
You avoid his gaze shyly. "I'm kinda honoured you wrote about me, though." You admit.
"I guess...I guess I could call you my muse." Jungkook blurts hurriedly. His nose is a deep shade of pink and it makes you want to tease him forever.
"Yeah." You nod to yourself with a smile. "I like that. Your muse."
And then his lips are on yours again, like he can't quite help himself, and you start to forget where yours begin and his end.
This time it's not delicate and sweet. It's slow and languid, hot and heavy. The sunflowers break your fall, Jungkook's lips never leaving yours as he climbs on top of you, one hand tangled in your hair, the other planted beside your head so that his chest hovers above yours. You're almost certain he can feel how hard your heart is pounding in your chest, but you don't care, too lost in the bliss of finally feeling Jungkook's plush lips against your own.
"Come to New York with me." He says breathlessly between kisses, and your heart stops.
"What?" You can hardly drag your lips away from his but you have to be sure you heard him right. New York?
"I mean, in the future. I'm gonna go to New York. Get a job at a film production company or something, I don't know--" He tucks a piece of hair behind your ear. "Come with me."
"I...I can't."
"Why?" He frowns. "Is it me?"
"No! God no."
"Then why? You said it was your dream right?" You nod. "So what's stopping you?"
"I..I have to take care of Taehyung, and my job at the Crestmont and--"
"Okay. Lets pretend none of that exists. It's just you and me." His breath ghosts against your forehead. "Y/N, will you come to New York with me?"
"Yes." It comes out breathless, but you mean it. With every atom and nerve and fiber in your body. "Lets go to New York."
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Where things change.
3 years later.
A postcard sits on the Welcome Home! Doormat you and Jungkook bought before you left for New York. You recognise the picture perfect image of Ocean City on the front, and Taehyung's messy scrawl on the back that tells you he's doing fine at his new management job at the Crestmont and he will be sending a housewarming gift imminently.
— Stay smiling, Y/N. Miss you already! Taehyung. :)
With a small smile you tack it onto the bare fridge. It brightens up the empty kitchen somewhat, a little piece of home and a reminder that you don't need to worry about leaving your brother behind to fend for himself so much any more. Since he pulled his life together and got a job at the theatre, it's like he came alive again. Found his purpose.
Speaking of purposes, you suppose that's how you found yourself here. In your very own apartment in a nice complex on the east side. The east side of New York City.
There's a pair of satin curtains hung over the balcony doors, probably left behind by the old tenant as it's the only form of furniture in the whole apartment. They rustle in the morning breeze and you tiptoe across the room barefoot to rip them open, letting your eyes flutter shut when the early morning sun filters through the glass and cascades over your face like a warm embrace.
You press a hand to the glass, studying your reflection; the messy lump of hair atop your head, the soft shadow of your lashes atop your cheeks. And beyond it, New York. Your new normal in all it's familiar glory from your dreams, yet still so deliciously foreign it makes your heart leap whenever a cab horn rings out in the distance or you breathe in the smell of fresh bagels from the shop down the street.
Home. You could finally call it that now. But New York is just a city and this apartment is just a house. The real reason you get to call this place home is because of who you came here with.
Jungkook.
You've been dating for two and a half years by now. He let you borrow one of his old much-too-big t-shirts to sleep in last night. There's a hole in the shoulder and the hem brushes your knees but it's warm and smells like his cologne and your heart expands when you close your eyes and remember this is just the beginning. You have so much to do, so many things to see here in New York. So many things to learn. And there's nobody you would want to explore life with more than Jungkook.
His camera equipment lays in a cardboard box by your feet, and something compels you to take out the old-school camcorder he loves. The leather strap tightens perfectly around your hand and the red RECORD button flashes as you open the doors wide and lift the lens to take in the view. Something tells you you're gonna want to remember this moment forever.
It's not long before a pair of arms wrap around your waist, chin tucked cheekily into your shoulder. "There you are." Jungkook husks, stilly groggy with sleep as his lips ghost across your cheek.
Turning around in his grasp, you find him still shirtless, sweatpants slung low around his hips. He's been working out recently, and you can't deny you don't love how firm his shoulders feel when you brace yourself on them to stand on your tip toes and leave a peck to his lips.
"Morning sleepyhead," you say, running your fingers through the strands of his silky bed hair. It's longer these days, whispering across the nape of his neck and falling across his round eyes sweetly. They flutter closed when you massage his scalp just how he likes it. "I was wondering when you'd finally get out of bed."
"Missed you." His lips turn up when he sees the camera pointed at his face. "Whaddya doing with that?"
"Making memories." You say simply, zooming in on him as he rubs his sleepy eyes. "So we never forget this."
A cheeky smirk appears on his lips as he wraps you in his arms, a surprised giggle leaving you when he spins you around and grabs the camera so he can point it at the both of you, his chin resting on your shoulder now as his bare arm snugly wraps around your waist.
"Hey stop! I just woke up, I look bad!"
"Hello us of the future," Jungkook chuckles, pulling your fingers away from your face when you bury your face in his chest to hide from the lens. "It's our first day in New York and Y/N is being all camera shy--okay, okay fine, lets show them the view instead!"
Jungkook finally flips the lens around so it focuses on the distant silhouettes of tall skyscrapers skimming the blue skyline, before he turns it back onto you guys once more with a mischievous look this time.
"But we have to go now because we have far more interesting business to attend to..." He lowers the camera as his lips start to trail up your collar bone and he smiles when your eyes flutter shut and you gasp at the feeling, but it's quickly replaced by a pout when you wriggle out of his embrace with a stern look.
"Not now. Later."
"Mmf? Why?" He whines, making grabby hands towards you. "You're so warm, jus' wanna cuddle for a bit."
"No time!" You call over your shoulder as you grab him by the hand and drag his heavy feet behind you. "We've got an apartment to decorate."
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Before you know it you've enlisted Jungkook's help in laying tarps across the living room floor, two pots of bright white paint plonked in the center. It's not like you could afford a decorator after all. You are two broke twenty-something's trying to make it big in New York, and all that cliche stuff. So you would just have to do it yourselves.
Jungkook's over in the corner, miming along to the guitar solo from some rock song playing from the radio balanced on the windowsill, the paint roller his instrument as he dances around the room with giddy impulse. There's paint all over his butt where he accidentally leaned against one of the wet walls and he's got his hair tied back into a bun at the crown of his head and you watch him out of the corner of your eye while an affectionate smile creeps onto your face no matter how hard you try to curb it.
That's when you notice the camera in his other hand. He zooms in on the stepladder in the corner, the paint spillage in the hall, the heart with Y/N + JUNGKOOK FOREVER written inside it on the back wall. Documenting everything as usual.
He was always filming you, too. Whether you were making coffee in the morning or drying your hair. He'd even slow down beside you on the sidewalk to get the perfect shot.
You find it cute, even though you pretend to hate it. It makes your heart flutter every time you catch him rewinding the footage with a contented smile on his face, like he just captured the whole world with his lens.
It's no surprise when you finish putting the final coat on the wall and step back to admire your handy work that you find him wandering around the apartment with his hand curved around the lens of one of his bigger cameras like it's natural to him. You always joke that thing is like an extra limb, but he looks so calm as he looks through his lens at the room that is now drunk on the afternoon sun pouring through the window, the golden rays like honey on his skin, that it's easy to see that the camera really is a part of him. Passion lies in the soft lines of concentration on his face, in the plump lip tugged between teeth as he fiddles with the settings.
Jungkook sees beauty where others don't, where others can't. It might as well pump through his veins. And it's one of the reasons you love him so much.
You shake your head when you see how a small smile finds his lips when he leans a shoulder against the door frame and lets the camera land on the thing he swears is most beautiful.
"Hey." You warn, shooting a side wards glare at the camera lens you spot Jungkook not so discreetly pointing in your direction. "Stop it."
"Stop what?" He runs a hand through his hair, lips pulling back into a sly bunny smile when you bend down to reach a spot you missed at the bottom of the wall. "I'm not doing anything."
Your upper lip twitches. "Are you zooming in on my ass?"
"What? No!" Jungkook scrunches his nose with wide eyes, a habit you knew meant he was guilty, a pout forming on your lips as he snaps the viewfinder closed and shoves the offending piece of his equipment behind his back.
You narrow your eyes affectionately. "Perv."
"I don't know what you're talking about." He blows a strand of hair out of his face innocently but there's a playful glint in his eyes and you can hardly keep a serious face as you plant your hands on your hips in what you hope is a menacing manner.
"Then lemme see it." You challenge with a nod to the camera behind him.
He feigns indifference, cocking his head to the side like an overgrown puppy. "See what?"
"That's it!" You shake your head, charging towards and him making grabby motions towards the camera. Jungkook looks down at you fondly as he holds it above your head, out of reach, and it only makes you you pout harder. "Hey! Give it!
"Never!" You jump pitifully, fingers grasping around nothing. A melodic chuckle spills from Jungkook's lips when you cross your arms over your chest in defeat and blink up at him crossly. "You have to say the magic word first."
You scoff at the teasing look on his face as he wiggles his eyebrows and waves the camera just above your head, before an idea strikes you and within seconds you're wielding a paintbrush, Jungkook's eyes widening when you point the paint coated bristles at his face.
"Give it up." You hold out your palm with a smug look. "Or the walls are not the only thing getting a fresh coat."
"You wouldn't." He smirks, despite being backed into a corner now.
"Oh yeah?" Without further ado you swipe the brush down the bridge of his nose, swallowing a giggle at the white smudge it leaves behind and his shocked expression beneath it. "You underestimate me, Jeon."
Jungkook pushes his tongue into his cheek, eyes dancing up and down your body before they lock with yours daringly. "You shouldn't have done that."
"Or what?" You taunt playfully, a laugh escaping you, but you quickly bite down on your lip when you see the glint in Jungkook's eyes as he submerges both his hands into the nearby bucket of paint.
You don't run when he steps closer. Instead your breathing quickens, heart doing a funny somersault when he brushes your hair to the side and clamps both of his wet hands on the sides of your jaw to bring your face up to his.
He tastes like coffee and desire when your lips crash together in a delicious tangle of teeth and tongue, all the thoughts racing through your mind dripping away like honey until all that's left is the thump of your heart against your chest and Jungkook's warmth as he backs you up against the wall.
When he pulls away he rubs his paint covered nose against yours, cocking his head and smiling sweetly when he leans back and admires his handy work.
"You have paint on your face." He looks down at his white hands innocently with a shrug. "Whoops?"
His hands trail down to your hips. You reach to your side and grab a fistful of paint, wiping it down the centre of his face and giggling when he groans and scrunches his eyes closed . "So do you."
"Okay, that's it. This means war!" Jungkook growls, strong arms wrapping around your waist, and before you know it you're stumbling over to the mattress in the corner, Jungkook's body hovering over yours.
"You wanna play dirty, huh?" Desire-filled eyes trace your face, travelling down the expanse of your neck before zeroing in on your collar bones. You gasp when Jungkook's lips attach themselves to the sensitive skin, every inch of you set alight when his burning fingers slide beneath the hem of your tshirt and find your thighs. "Always being such a bad girl, huh?"
"So? What're you gonna do about it? Punish me?" You say teasingly, and he stiffens, lips leaving a mark behind on your neck with a pop. Jungkook's narrowed eyes meet yours and you feel your heart speed up with anticipation.
His lips twitch, like they're dying to turn up. "Brat."
With that, you're being flipped over onto your knees with a yelp. Jungkook's hands work quickly and before you know it your tshirt is over your head and the sudden breeze from the open balcony doors against your hardened nipples makes you gasp.
"You love it." You laugh breathily.
"Too much," Jungkook confirms, before his large palm presses you down into the bed firmly between the shoulder blades so that your ass is thrust up in the air. You wiggle is teasingly, though the breath catches in your throat when the first spank lands on your bare skin. Then a second, the sound ringing out through the empty room like an echo and making a damp spot appear on your panties.
"Hey!" You chastise when you remember the paint on his hands that just left two glaring handprints right across your ass.
Jungkook just smirks. "What? Now everyone knows it's mine."
A third slap and you have to bite the blanket to stop from groaning, then a fourth, and a fifth and by then your eyes are watering but in the best way. Calloused hands smooth over the burning area, soothing it.
"Good girl," A raspy voice whispers next to your ear. "Such a good girl for me, taking your punishment. I think you deserve your reward now, hm?"
"Please." You moan as he reaches around to grasp your breast, tweaking your nipples in a way that has you writhing beneath him.
"Don't say I didn't warn you though," Jungkook chuckles as he rips your panties down your legs, gasping at the sight of your dripping slit like it's the first time. He runs a finger down your folds, biting back a groan when it makes your legs fall open a little further, desperate for his touch. "I'm not gonna go easy on you."
"Jungkook, what do you-- oh!." Before you can finish, Jungkook is pushing your face back into the comforter, spreading your cheeks with his palms and licking an agonizingly slow stripe up your throbbing core. His tongue finds your clit easily, toying it with the tip playfully until you're gasping for air.
"Mmf, tastes so good." He murmurs against your folds, the vibrations of his chuckle making you moan so hard your legs start to shake. His tongue finds your hole, swirling around teasingly before it slips inside and you can't handle it anymore.
"Jungkook!" You gasp, reaching behind to grab his hair. "I..I can't-"
"You can." He says, almost a command, mouth leaving your pussy only so he can slide over onto his back and pull you back down onto his face by the hips.
"Oh g-god!" Your hand reaches for the headboard, landing on the wall to steady yourself when you remember you still haven't bought a bed frame yet. Your legs are starting to ache from holding yourself up but you don't care, too lost in the feeling of Jungkook's tongue lapping at your swollen folds as you grind in lazy circles on his face.
"C-close, Kook." You manage to splutter, head thrown back with pleasure when he slides two of his fingers inside you and starts to pump in time with his tongue, the sensation of being filled enough to send you over the edge into a shuddering climax that is unlike anything you've felt before, the only thought on your mind the way your hole clenches around your boyfriend's fingers.
It takes a few moments for your legs to stop shaking, your hearing slowly coming back into focus as you hear both of your heavy breaths intermingled. You look between your legs to find Jungkook staring up at you with a grin, eyes filled with wonder. His chin gleams with your juices, the front of his t-shirt damp as you realise with a gasp what just happened.
"Did I--?"
"Yup."
"Holy fuck." You swing your leg over his shoulder so you're beside him, Jungkook sitting up to look at you, still mesmerised. "I...I'm sorry, that was--"
"The hottest thing you've ever done." Jungkook finishes, grinning at you like he just won the lottery.
You raise a brow, surprised. "Really?"
"Yeah. Can I fuck you now?"
You can't help but laugh at his eager puppy dog eyes, hands practically twitching at his sides to touch you. A quick glance at his crotch confirms the biggest tent in his pants you've ever seen, and you crook a finger towards him with a sultry smile and a nod.
"Let's see if you can make me do that again."
"O-Okay!" Jungkook pulls his shirt over his head eagerly, and then he's on top of you, burning skin meeting burning skin. Your palm runs down his chest, Jungkook's eyes falling shut when it reaches the hem of his sweatpants. You cant help but gasp when your fingers wrap around his length through his boxers, core already throbbing again to be filled. He shivers when your finger circles his tip, admiring the wet patch on his boxers.
"Eager?" You smirk.
"You squirted on my face, Y/N, of course I'm goddamn eager."
"Get these off then." You tug at his pants and he kicks them off without a second telling.
"Your wish is my command."
When he returns to hovering over you, both completely bare now, he pauses. His eyes meet yours, a gentle smile appearing on his lips as he tucks a stray piece of hair behind your ear and grips your jaw protectively.
"I love you, y'know."
You close the distance between you, pressing your lips against his but barely able to keep yourself from grinning with the elation swirling in your chest. "I love you too, doofus. Now hurry up or I'm gonna have to fuck myself."
"That sounds kinda awesome--"
"Kook!"
"Okay, okay, on it!"
Palms spread your legs, and you both gasp when Jungkook runs the blunt head of his leaking cock up and down your slit, coating himself in your juices before he lines it up with your entrance.
"Ready?" He checks, thumb tracing circles into your inner thigh.
"As I'll ever be."
And with that, he pushes inside, his head falling into the crook of your neck with a sigh of relief at finally feeling your walls clenching around his throbbing length. The stretch of his girth stings, but it makes you feel so deliciously full, so perfectly whole to be connected to Jungkook like this that all you can get out is another soft I love you that earns a blissful smile from your boyfriend as he starts to move.
Each stroke makes you lose your breath, the tip of his cock hitting your sweet spot just right. It's when Jungkook takes your nipple into his mouth that you feel a second orgasm start to build, one hand gripping the sheets as the other drags scratch marks down his muscular back in blissful agony.
It's not long before Jungkook spills inside you with a deep growl, your own high hitting you as you feel him coat your walls. He collapses onto your chest, breaths deep and exhausted, and wraps you in his arms before you can even catch your breath.
Jungkook pulls the sheets up over your shoulders and places a kiss to the top of your head. He's so warm you feel yourself start to drift off into a blissful sleep, the smile on your lips never faltering.
"I love you too." Is the last thing you hear him say before sleep takes you under, and you're safe wrapped up in each other's arms.
When you open your eyes, the room is warm with sunset's rose tinted blush, and Jungkook's body is no longer beside you. Rubbing your bleary eyes, you sit up on your elbow and find him on the ground in front of the freshly painted wall, intricate petals and stems flowing from the end of the paintbrush he delicately waves across the surface to paint the prettiest sunflower you've ever seen.
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"I'm home!" You hear your boyfriend yell out as he shuffles into the apartment, quickly followed by a yelp. "Hey, Gureum, stop trying to lick my face!"
You can't stop the smile that spreads across your features when a ball of white fluff comes bounding into the living room, the puppy that excitedly jumps into your arms tracking a trail of muddy paw prints over the script in your hands.
"Hey Gureum," You coo, scratching him behind the ears where you know his sweet spot is. "You're such a good boy, huh?"
"Don't praise him! He totally ran away from me in Central Park and I had to chase him all the way home!" You can practically hear Jungkook's eye roll, shaking your head fondly at the mock annoyance in his voice. It was Jungkook who begged you to adopt a puppy for months in the first place, and they've been more or less inseparable ever since — the little guy hardly ever leaves his side. It's safe to say Jungkook is definitely Gureum's favourite.
The smell of coffee and fresh bagels wafts through the apartment, a warm sensation settling in your stomach as your boyfriend rounds the corner and waves a brown paper bag.
"Still got us enough coffee to stay up all night learning lines though." Jungkook grins, dumping the contents onto the coffee table and raising his eyebrows when your hands dart straight for the chocolate cookies. "Speaking of learning lines, how is it going, pretty?"
He nods towards the script in your hand. It's worn at the edges and ferociously dog eared from all the nights you have stayed up until sunrise reciting the words littered across the pages over and over, until it's like your lips are moving by muscle memory and the words are a part of you.
After what felt like hundreds of failed auditions, you had started to lose hope. With every letter that landed on the porch with another SORRY or MAYBE NEXT TIME, you felt all the confidence in the dream you worked so hard to uncover start to dwindle.
But Jungkook was always there, by your side no matter what. Encouraging you when you forgot your lines or holding you when you didn't get the callback. Reminding you to eat whenever you were too absorbed in your work to cook or cheering you on from the crowd at your weekly improv performances.
It was Jungkook who cried with you when the director of the small theatre downtown called and gave you the lead part in his upcoming stage production. Your big break. And you were determined to make sure everything ran smoothly at opening night tomorrow, which is how you find yourself snuggled up on the couch rewinding your VHS copy of Dirty Dancing over and over again until you have every word memorised by heart.
"Pretty good." You say as you pop a salted peanut into your mouth while Jungkook slips out of his tweed jacket. He's been trying to dress more New-York-ish these days, or so he says. More dress pants and less sweats. "Final rehearsals start at five."
"Aren't you nervous?" Jungkook squishes into the space beside you, Gureum cuddling up between your bodies.
Tomorrow night's show is sold out, along with every night after that for the next week. You heard there were going to be at least 700 people there each night.
"Terribly." You admit, stomach churning at the thought of 700 pairs of eyes staring right at you. You try to focus on the fizzing excitement that lingers there too, growing stronger and stronger. "But I think I'm more excited".
"I'm excited to see you up there doing what you love." Jungkook smiles, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear. "My star."
"Well don't get too excited because I still keep messing up this one goddamn scene," You flip the script to a page covered in bright highlighter scribbles and run your fingers through your hair exasperatedly. "I'm totally gonna mess it up and then I'll never get another job and—"
"Shhh," Jungkook takes the script from your hands and runs his eyes over it quickly. "Don't talk like that. You're gonna be amazing — hold up..." He raises an eyebrow. "Is this...the kiss scene?"
You feel your cheeks redden, voice small. "Yes."
"Then you're in luck because who better to help you practice than the best kisser in all of New York?"
You snort. "Wow, I sure could use some of your expertise Good-Sir-Makes-Out-A-Lot."
"Then you're in the right place..." He runs his finger over the script, jabbing at one line in particular.
[Johnny and Baby kiss.]
"Let's start here, hm? For practice, obviously."
"For practice." Your eyes roll but your heart still beats a little faster as he closes the space between you, hand pressing into the wall so his sturdy body hovers over yours, hands instinctively pulling him closer by the collar.
"Come give me a kiss, m'lady..." Jungkook murmurs, but before he can tilt your chin up towards his lips there's a sudden series of frantic knocks at the front door.
"What the heck?"
You both jump out of your skin, Jungkook's eyes narrowing as he glances over his shoulder at the shadowy figure outside, fist pounding the glass fervently, like they're trying to break it down.
"Okay, damn, I'm coming!" He yells with a roll of his eyes. He wraps the blanket around your shoulders as he hops up from the couch with a sigh. "Probably just some dumb marketer again or something — dude, chill! I said I'm coming! — be right back."
The lock slides open and you hear Jungkook gasp. Your stomach drops. "Who is it?"
"Uh, Y/N..." You hear the door click shut and the sound of squeaky shoes shuffling inside. The anxiety in Jungkook's voice makes your heart skip. "You might wanna come see this."
"Huh?" Your legs feel shaky as you follow him out into the hall, chest seizing when you lay eyes on the dripping wet hair and chattering teeth of the shivering man stood before you, eyes dark and grave like they used to be.
"Taehyung?" You splutter, ripping the blanket from around your shoulders and swaddling him in it as quickly as you can, Jungkook already bounding into the other room to get dry clothes and towels after shooting you a terrified glance.
Taehyung grabs your shoulders and pulls you into a tight embrace. His cheeks are wet against your shoulder, but you can't tell if it's because he's been crying or because he's been out in the freezing cold rain — hold on, did he walk here?
"Y/N," He murmurs frantically, eyes darting back and forth but never quite focusing on anything. You knew this look. This is how he looked that day you found out about the accident. Murky, far far away. Devastatingly sad. Something wasn't right.
"What is it?" You ask, pulling him into the living room and sitting him on the couch before his shaking knees buckle beneath him. "What are you doing here, Tae?"
"It's...it's the Crestmont." He whispers.
"What about the Crestmont?" Jungkook appears behind Taehyung, placing a comforting hand on his shoulder, but it's like your brother doesn't even feel it.
"They're tearing it down." He mumbles. "They're tearing down the Crestmont. Forever."
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"Okay, now let's start from the beginning."
Jungkook's calm voice lilts from beside Taehyung who, after a warm shower and two cups of cocoa, has stopped shivering and seems to be ready to talk.
A hand reaches across the coffee table to tug on your wrist mid-lift to your mouth, a reminder from Jungkook to stop biting your nails. An old nervous habit you thought you'd left behind in Ocean City but apparently more than just Taehyung showed up here unannounced tonight.
"I...I got a call this morning." Taehyung begins, pausing to take a sip from the mug he cradles in his lap. His hands are shaking so he places it on the coffee table for safe keeping, right beside your discarded script. "It was from a construction company."
"And?" You prod, somewhat impatiently, making Taehyung jump.
"And apparently the owner of the theatre is behind on rent and...and..." He swallows hard. "And they're buying the rights to tear it down and build an apartment complex in its place."
"What?" Both you and Jungkook exclaim at the same time.
Jungkook's fists clench. "I always knew that old man was shady."
Taehyung fumbles in the pocket of the coat he arrived with, retrieving a brochure which he thrusts towards you.
The image on the front is of a metal skyscraper, far too shiny and new to belong in a seaside town like Ocean City. Fusion Apartments — modern living.
Jungkook rakes a hand through his hair, eyes sorrowful as you pass it over to him. "This sucks. Big time." He murmurs. "The Crestmont is the heart of Ocean City. How can they just bulldoze it like it means nothing?"
"That's why..." Taehyung swallows. "That's why I came here. I thought maybe you guys could help me, and we could do something before they—"
"We?" You furrow your brows. "You want us to help stop them from tearing down the Crestmont?"
"I mean yeah, I guess? I figured you guys would understand how important it is—"
You bite your lip. Taehyung flinches when you place a hand on his knee. "Tae. It seems like they've already got it figured out I mean...what can we do about it? The Crestmont has had a long run and maybe it's time for something new in Ocean City..."
"Y/N?" Jungkook warns, but there's a betrayal in his voice. How could you say that? It pains you, but you continue anyway. "What are you saying?"
"I just...I think it's time to let the Crestmont go."
Taehyung stands up so abruptly his mug smashes onto the marble tile.
"How could you?" He roars, but his bottom lip trembles. "The Crestmont is mom's place! It's all we have left of her in that fucking town and you want to just let them burn it to the ground?"
You tut, kneeling to pick up the broken pieces of china with a sharp glance at your brother. "For goodness sake, Taehyung. Mom isn't there anymore. She never was. She was always running off with some roadies and leaving us behind because she thought she was something special."
Taehyung scoffs. "What? Just like you?" He grabs the cocoa sodden script, crumpling it up in his shaking fist. "You are exactly the same as her. Running off to New York and leaving me behind to get your big break."
Jungkook steps forward warily. "Taehyung, you don't mean that—"
"Yes I do! If Y/N had just gotten in the car that day she wouldn't have died. It was all her fault. And now she's just gonna let them take what we have left of her."
"What?" Jungkook blinks.
Your stomach sinks. Is that really what Taehyung thinks? You wouldn't blame him. Deep down, his words strike a nerve. Because you know they're true.
Taehyung's eyes are hazy, unfocused. You reach for him dizzily, but he backs away into the hall.
"I shouldn't have come here." Taehyung whispers. He looks between you and Jungkook one last time before he's grabbing his coat and running down the steps to the first floor.
"Taehyung, wait!" You hear Jungkook's footsteps follow him out into the stairwell, but you're trapped on the ground, heaving for air.
Your hands shake as you pull yourself up to the window pane and watch Taehyung disappear into the gloom of the city, the sorrowful raindrops that lash against the glass mirroring the ones on your cheeks.
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YOU: Taehyung??? YOU: [CALL IGNORED] YOU: please Tae YOU: can we at least talk about this? YOU: we're worried about you
It's been nearly 12 hours since you watched Taehyung disappear among the hustle and bustle of New York from your apartment window.
You and Jungkook were out all night searching for him. By the time you gave up the sun was rising and the birds were chirping and Jungkook somehow convinced your shivering form to return home to rest with a Taehyung shaped hole in your heart.
"It'll be okay. He'll be okay. He always is."
A phone call to your dad revealed he hadn't returned home that night; so where did he go exactly?
The weight of that question sits heavy in your chest as you sit backstage at the theatre, staring into your own vacant eyes in the dressing room mirror.
It's opening night. The show is due to start in fifteen minutes. Your lips are painted a deep shade of red, hair backcombed to perfection by one of the makeup artists. Beneath the harsh lights of the exposed bulbs that line the mirror, you look almost unrecognisable.
Confident, strong, successful.
Anyone would say your dreams had come true, or something sappy to that effect. But even as you sit among the hustle and bustle of the costume team and breathe in the fragrance of perfume and powder blush, you couldn't feel further away from the New York version of yourself if you tried.
Staring back at you is a reflection of the shy, terrified girl from Ocean City you worked so hard to forget. Yet here she is, mind whirring with worries for her brother instead of the lines she should be rehearsing to death before curtain call.
This should be your big moment. One which you will remember forever. But all you want to do right now is hold Taehyung close like you used to and tell him you're sorry and that you won't leave him again.
"Y/N!" You're snapped out of your thoughts by a familiar hand on your shoulder. You cover it with your own, instantly eased somewhat when you glance up and lock eyes with Jungkook in the mirror.
"Y/N, I found him."
"What?!" You jump to your feet, chair scraping obscenely. It draws the eyes of the people around you who quickly register Jungkook's polite smile as their cue to shuffle out of the dressing room and leave you two to talk. "Where is he? I need to talk to him—"
"He's not coming."
"What?"
Jungkook sinks into the chair beside you, forehead creased. He runs a hand through his hair and momentarily you catch a glimpse of the old Jungkook. The Jungkook that always took care of his best friend Taehyung.
"I...I gave him a ticket for the show tonight and told him to come. To see how much this really means to you...but—"
Your finger nails press half moons into your palms. "But what, Kook?"
"He was already leaving for Ocean City."
A sob wracks your frame. "Do you think he hates me?"
Jungkook's arms engulf you before the first tear can roll down your cheek, his chin tucking perfectly into the cleft of your shoulder. "Of course not, he's just...he's hurting right now."
"I can't lose him — not like this, Kook..."
"Shh. It'll all be okay."
You jump back and start to pace. "But it's not okay! What he said last night is true!"
Jungkook sucks in a breath. "What?"
Your knees buckle and you crumple. You can hardly breathe, shame washing over you as you admit the truth for the first time.
"I caused the accident! I'm the reason my mom's...she's..."
Jungkook wraps his arm around your shoulder, voice soothing. "What are you talking about?"
"The night of the accident she got a call from some big buck director. She was cast in this huge movie. Her big break." You're speaking to fast, but Jungkook nods to tell you he's listening.
"So she told Taehyung and I we were leaving for New York that night. And we were packing our bags before my dad got home and...and I said I wasn't coming. I didn't wanna leave Ocean City behind."
"I kicked and cried and said I didn't want to go, so her and Taehyung took off by themselves and that's when they got into the crash. She was upset and going too fast. It was all because of me." You start to sob. You've never admitted this to anyone before. Not even yourself. It tears your heart in two to say it out loud. "I'm the reason Taehyung's broken."
"You can't think like that." Jungkook clasps your face in his hands, thumb wiping away a stray tear. He looks scared, but his voice stays calm and convincing. "What happened was an accident. You were a kid. None of this is your fault."
"That's why Taehyung must hate me so much." You choke. "I'm doing what mom always wanted to, but she never had the chance because of me."
"Y/N?" A crew member steps into the room awkwardly with a cough. "I'm sorry to interrupt but the show is about to start. The audience is getting restless."
"Go. I'll take care of Taehyung, okay?" Jungkook pulls you to your feet, engulfing you in a final hug before he pushes you towards the stage entrance at the small of your back. "You're needed out there. Show them what you're made of."
Your eyes widen. This can't be happening. Not now.
"I...I can't."
"You can." Jungkook grabs your face and captures your lips, hard. It tastes salty with tears. "You're my star remember?"
"I love you." You whisper when you pull back, fingers reaching for him weakly as a costume designer hurries you towards the door.
"I love you too." Jungkook calls. His smile is the last thing you see before the door slams shut and there's no going back. "Now go break a leg, pretty!"
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Particles of dust float in and out of your vision beneath the blinding stage lights.
Everything feels different from side stage. Your heart races as you press your ear to the velvet curtain separating you from the world, listening to the hubbub of laughing children and chattering adults filtering into the theatre. You imagine them taking their seats, buying icecream from the vendors, alive with anticipation.
The lights dim. You hear the director behind you, shouting something about places please! but it's like you're underwater, limbs weighted as you move like a ghost to your position for the opening number.
Your palms are clammy and you wipe them on your dress.
Show starting in 5...
Your legs turn to jelly. You close your eyes and try to calm your racing thoughts.
4...
Taehyung. Is he okay? Why didn't he come tonight?
3...
Shit! What was your opening line again? Goddamnit, Y/N, think!
2...
Mom. Would she be proud?
1...
You open your eyes.
The curtain is gone, and a pair of hands pushes you out into the harsh white spotlight. You shield your eyes with your fingers, heart dropping when you look up and find hundreds of eyes staring. Staring right at you.
It's like you're on the edge of a cliff, about to dive into the cool water below. Or fall.
Everything starts to blur. You're a teenager again, stood on the stage at the Crestmont. Panic rises like bile in your throat, and you don't know whether to scream or to run.
Run. Run. Run.
Your mouth opens, then closes. There's an awkward cough from the audience. Words run your mind in circles, but none of them are right, and before they can reach your lips they evaporate on your tongue.
Your panicked eyes roam the sea of seats that zoom in and out of focus. Your knees buckle, and you're sure you are going to pass out right here in front of everyone, but then your eyes meet a familiar pair of brown ones that makes the room stop spinning for a moment.
Jungkook. He's smiling at you, fingers crossed in his lap. There's not a trace of nerves in his gaze as he nods for you to go ahead.
I believe in you.
Just then the door to the theatre flies open and every head in the audience turns towards the darkly clothed figure shuffling through the aisles, mumbling sorry's and excuse me's until he reaches the empty seat beside your boyfriend.
He lets down his hood, shakes free a head of blonde hair that's still damp from the rain. He's out of breath, like he ran here.
Taehyung.
Your brother looks up at you, frozen in place, and his eyes soften. He flashes you a thumbs up and his lips curl around the four words you needed to hear.
You can do this.
And just like that, the panic disappears. The words come flooding back, and your body flies into action, moving across the stage
You forget all about the fear, and the anxiety, and Taehyung and the Crestmont. For now it's just you and the stage, together in harmony.
And you've never felt more alive than when you take your final bow and the crowd roars to life, just like you always imagined it would.
Your jaw hurts from smiling, and before you know it you're crying. Because when you squint against the theatre lights, you see Taehyung and Jungkook in the front row, holding each other and shouting your name.
Y/N! Y/N! Y/N!
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"Hey! Be careful!"
The bouquet of congratulatory geraniums cradled in your arms gets crushed between your body and your brother's. He practically tackled you as soon as you entered the dressing room, carried on the cheering shoulders of the other cast and crew members.
"Holy shit." Taehyung holds you at arms length. His eyes are ringed red around the edges. "You were amazing, Y/N."
"You really think so?" Tears start to well and you're so happy to see him that you throw your arms around his waist. "I'm so glad you came, Tae."
"Yeah. You were just like her." He smiles. "Just like mom."
You share a small, sad smile. You've heard those words all your life but it feels different when it comes from Taehyung.
Jungkook pops his head into the room. He catches your eye over Taehyung's shoulder, and flashes you a small smile when he sees you cradling him in your arms.
Talk to him. He mouths, and you're suddenly reminded of why Taehyung came here in the first place.
"Hey listen—"
"Taehyung—"
You both start to talk, bursting into easy laughter when the other stops, seemingly hit with the same idea at the same time.
"You go first." You smile, encouragingly.
"Okay." He pulls you over to the couch. "I'm just...I'm sorry for storming out last night. I shouldn't have come here and expected you to help me—"
"No, stop. I'm sorry." You place a hand over his. "I want to help." You hold an arm out to Jungkook, who crosses the room and slides his hand into yours. "We want to help. We want to save the Crestmont."
Taehyung's eyes bulge. His voice drops to a whisper. "Really?"
"You were right. The Crestmont was mom's place."
You think about how it felt to be out there on the stage, in front of a crowd cheering your name. The excitement, the exhilaration. Your first stage.
The Crestmont is your mom's first stage. It's where she felt those same emotions for the first time. You can't let it be demolished. Not for anything.
"She deserves a legacy. We can't let them tear it down. I don't know how yet, but we'll save it."
"Thank you." A tear streaks his cheek, and his arms pull you and Jungkook into a tight bear hug.
"Thank you. For showing me what really matters, Tae." You whisper. "Let's do this together, okay?"
"For mom."
Taehyung holds out his pinky finger, and you link yours with his.
"For mom."
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Where things go wrong.
Six months later.
Every second that passes is marked by a deafening tick from the kitchen clock.
Jungkook was supposed to be home 10 minutes ago. You're sat alone at the dinner table, a carefully presented meal for two spread across your mom's old polka dot table cloth. You even lit candles.
With a sigh you drop your chin into your hand, absentmindedly pushing your spaghetti around the dish while your eyes remain trained to the front door that will open any moment.
To be honest, it's been months since you and Jungkook shared a meal together. He spends most of his nights in his office, hunched over his laptop staring at the blinking cursor on some script he'll never finish. And ever since Jungkook's big script got rejected and he fell into a slump of no work, he had to get a job at a local convenience store all day for some spare cash to get you through the month.
You know he hates it. He hates the rude customers and how he can never shower the smell of grease out of his hair.
You know the bickering that turned into arguing that turned into fighting was just a result of his restless aggravation at being shot down too many times. Of watching his dream slip right through his fingers.
But you haven't exactly been as understanding as you should have been. You're overworked too, with the play, and The Crestmont, and you hate how easy it was to accept sleeping apart and missing dinner dates.
So you texted him to tell him you were making dinner tonight. A cease fire of sorts, or maybe just a feeble attempt at glueing back together the cracks that have appeared between you recently with pasta sauce and meatballs.
But he's late. Again.
And it makes you wonder whether there was any point in trying.
"Y/N?"
A gravelly voice jolts you out of your thoughts. Keys jangle onto the counter, shoes are slipped from feet and thrown into the storage cupboard with the creaky door.
"I'm in here." Your voice sounds meek, but you straighten and muster up a smile. To show at least one of you is making an effort.
Jungkook appears in the doorway, clad in his ugly traffic cone orange uniform. His shoulders are slumped, bangs limply stuck to his forehead. He looks tired, exhausted.
"What's all this?" He nods disinterestedly towards your untouched homemade buffet before heading to the sink to fix himself a glass of water.
"Dinner." You cough. He stiffens. "Remember?"
"Oh." He scratches the back of his neck. His eyes flash with something close to guilt momentarily, but then he smoothes it out. "Yeah. Dinner."
"It's okay, you're not too late. We can just heat this up in the microwave—"
"I already ate, Y/N." The glass in his hand slams onto the counter a little too loudly. "At the store."
You can't hide the way your face drops.
"Please." You whisper. "For me?"
Jungkook stares at you for a few seconds, unblinking, before he exhales shakily and pulls out the seat opposite you.
"What's on the menu?" He asks, hands already grabbing for the bottle of red wine in the middle of the table without so much as a glance at the food you worked so hard to prepare.
"Pasta."
"Right."
An uncomfortable silence settles. Jungkook nibbles at a meatball, and you suddenly feel too sick to the stomach to keep anything down.
You jump when Jungkook's fork clatters to the table. He wipes pasta sauce from the corners of his mouth with a napkin and you're sure you can see a slight tremor in his grasp.
"There's something I need to tell you."
His words ring out into the deafening silence that shrouds the apartment. You train your eyes to the candle in the middle of the table that flickers back and forth and carefully place down your own cutlery.
"Should I be worried?"
"No...I mean, I don't know. Maybe." Jungkook waves his hands around and when his eyes meet yours they're distant. Like the table that separates you spans oceans. "Just promise not to freak out."
"I'm not promising anything. Why are you looking at me like that?"
He shifts and the cheap flat pack dining chairs you bought when you moved in creak like they always do. "I...I got a movie deal. They loved the script I told them I've been working on and they want me to direct it."
Your heart fills with something sweet; pride. Even despite your downs recently this is still incredible news. You knew your boyfriend should be ecstatic...so why is he staring intently at the table cloth like it killed his whole family? "That's awesome, Kook. So what's the problem?"
"I gave them a different script."
Something shifts in the air. You hold your breath.
"Huh?"
"The script. The one you told me to burn before we came to New York. The one about you...your life."
Your blood runs cold and it's like your frozen. Just searching through the never ending blackness behind Jungkook's eyes that fails to falter, no matter how hard you pinch your inner thigh and hope you're about to wake up from a bad dream.
"You wouldn't." Your voice sounds strained and Jungkook doesn't even flinch. "You...I don't believe you."
"I'm sorry." He runs an exasperated hand through his hair. "It's just that they hated the first one and I wanted this deal so bad. It's a once in a lifetime chance Y/N, don't you see?"
The boy staring back at you isn't the sweet and sensitive Jungkook from Ocean City or the strong and passionate man from New York. His words get all mixed up in your head as you repeat them over and over and it's as if you don't even know him at all. All you can feel now is betrayal. And just like that all the anger that has been building inside you for months explodes.
"So my life is just a fucking plot for one of your indie movies, Jungkook?"
"It's always your life isn't it? Never mine." He slams his hands on the table hard enough to make your insides shake. "Ever since we came to New York I've supported you, sat back and watched as you achieved all your dreams. And it hurts, Y/N. To come home from my dead end job, and write another goddamn script that nobody wants to even read."
"I came to New York because of you!" You don't even realise you're crying until you taste the hot salty tears that won't seem to stop. "I came here so you could make it big! You're the one who encouraged me to audition for the play in the first place!"
"God, are you really that naive? Don't you see? I came to New York because I saw how much it meant to you." Jungkook lowers his voice, and there's something in his words that makes your heart twist. Pain. His eyes look watery and you long to reach out for him. Like the skin on skin contact will somehow make all of this okay. "And not once have you ever considered how it might feel for me to sit back in your shadow."
"So that's what this is? Jealousy?" You shake your head and get up from the table and turn to leave, but Jungkook grasps your wrist.
"Why can't you be happy for me?"
"I am happy for you Jungkook. And I always will be." Your heart softens and you're reminded of the boyfriend you know. The boyfriend you love. You want to believe he's in there somewhere so you place your hand over his, and for a second he looks hopeful. "But this was never your story to tell. That's what hurts."
He drops your arm, gaze cold and distant. "Then I guess that's it then."
"What?"
The room starts to spin.
"If you can't accept my decision to go ahead with the project then I guess we can't do this anymore."
"This?" You whisper.
"Us."
"Jungkook...Are you saying we're over?"
He drops his head into his hands and lets out a sigh. "Maybe. I don't know."
"You don't know?" You chuckle but it's hollow, empty. "You don't know if you love me any more?"
Jungkook's face drops and he lurches towards you, but you step back.
"No, shit Y/N I didn't mean it like that!" He looks scared. "I was just angry and it slipped out."
"Don't." His arms reach for you again but the brush of his fingertips feels scalding hot, wrong. "Don't fucking touch me."
"I'm sorry..."
"Don't lie to me Jungkook." Your vision is blurred with tears as you rip open the closet and yank out a suitcase. "You're not sorry. I was never your muse. I was just a stepping stool to the top."
"Where are you going?" Jungkook's crying now too. It comes out as a sob.
"Home." You say as you rip open your shared closet door and start throwing your things into the case. "I'm going home. Where I belong."
"I can't lose you like this. Please." He reaches for your wrist again but you're already half way to the door.
"Too late." You say. "I'm going home. And I'm never coming back."
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The familiar scent of burned popcorn and candyfloss soothes you as you creep through the backdoor of the Crestmont. It always had a broken hinge which opened just enough for a body to squeeze through. Seems not a lot has changed since you left Ocean City.
It's dark inside. Silent too, without the popcorn machine running and the movie trailers playing on LED screens. You don't know what you expected. It's gone midnight by the time you get back to Ocean City, but you don't want to go home just yet.
Comfort washes over you as you run your fingers over the gilded edges of the counter, and slip beneath the hatch on auto pilot. It feels strange to be back here without the starched shirt and bow tie you used to hate. You've swapped out worn sneakers for heels that click against the tiles and you've performed on stages for crowd's bigger than the Crestmont's but here and now, you feel like yourself. Even though everything in your life has changed, you're still the same small town girl underneath it all.
Without thinking your legs carry you to the wall of fame. The faces smile up at you, like they're saying welcome back.
"Hey mom," You whisper, stopping momentarily in front of her portrait. You stared at it for so long as a kid that you have every detail committed to memory but seeing it up this close makes your breath hitch. "It's me."
With a sigh you force yourself past into the hall. Your hands tremble as you push open the door to the theatre. It's just how you remember it, sparkling gold and red velvet and mystery. But there's yellow tape strung up across all the seats and a sign has been propped up on the stage, red glaring letters burning a hole in your heart as you read them.
DANGER. DUE FOR DEMOLISHMENT. STAY AWAY.
All you can do is let your legs buckle, back sliding down the wall as you hug your knees to your chest and let out a throaty sob that echoes from the high ceiling.
When did everything go so wrong? You must be cursed. Everything you touch gets destroyed.
"Y/N?"
The lights flicker on, bathing the room in a soft golden glow. You wipe your tears, but that doesn't stop them from coming.
"Over here."
Your voice is small but a few seconds later Taehyung's face appears from behind one of the velvet seats. His eyes soften when he sees you curled up in the corner.
"What are you doing down here?" He clambers over the seat to join you, his long legs folded awkwardly in the small space.
"Having a one man party." You snort and point to your tear stained cheeks.
"Are you okay?" His hand covers yours and the contact makes you jump.
"Yes..." You sniff. He raises a brow. "No. Jungkook broke up with me."
Taehyung chokes. "What?!"
"I mean, we fought and then he...he said we were over." Your heart stabs painfully but you shrug. "So I came here. Didn't know where else to go."
He places an encouraging hand on your shoulder. "Listen...I know I haven't always been there for you when I should've. Hell, you always took care of me and I never even asked how you were doing." He offers a small smile. "But I'm here now. And you can tell me anything. If...if you want to."
A few seconds tick by in silence. You try to form a sentence but everything just comes back to the same three words.
"I miss mom." You blurt.
It echoes through the theatre, and you can practically hear the mermaids and the cupids painted on the ceiling gasp. It surprises you too, the combination of grief and relief that washes over you at finally admitting it.
"I know." Taehyung pulls you into his chest, lips whispering against your hair as you let out a sob and it's like all the sadness and denial is rushing out of you like a faucet, filling the whole room up like a water tank. You're terrified of the moment it gets too full, and you stop being able to breathe. "But you're a lot like her, y'know."
"That's exactly the problem!" Your words come out as a yell and it makes you both jump. "Everyone always says I look like her, I talk like her, I act like her. And I hated it for the longest time because I hated her for leaving us!"
"But without even realising it I became her, Tae. I did what I always said I wouldn't and became selfish. I hurt you, and Jungkook and even the Crestmont."
"That's not true."
"It is! And the worst part is I don't even hate her any more. I need her. To hold me, and tell me it's going to be alright. But she isn't here!"
"What does this have to do with Jungkook?"
"Jungkook wrote a script. A long time ago. About mom. And you and I. And everything that happened." You swallow, Taehyung's eyebrow raises though he doesn't look at all surprised by this information, nor as horrified as you that a record of your bleak shortcomings exists for anyone to read. "He got a movie deal. That's why we fought."
Taehyung hums. "You don't want him to make the movie?"
"It's not that I...I want to be happy for him. But I can't." You choke. "It's too painful. Remembering."
Accepting.
"When I said you were a lot like mom, I meant that you are headstrong." Taehyung pauses. "I felt that way once too. Like I hated mom and the goddamn world for taking her too soon. But in the end, the only person I hated was myself. Like however hard I tried I could never get over her, and all the pain I was pushing down into a dark place kept taunting me through the nightmares." He shivers, and you grip his hand tighter. "But one day I realised I don't have to be afraid of that pain any more. That pain is a part of me. But that doesn't mean I have to let it win."
"So what did you do?"
"I let myself feel it . I faced it. The only way I could let mom go was to stop running away." He pats your shoulder. "You need to set the girl in that script free, so you can move on."
And just like that, you're swimming...up, up, up, until you reach the surface of the water tank and you can take a heaving breath for the first time.
You throw your arms around his neck. It feels weird to hug him like this, but it's nice. "I missed you, Tae. Thank you.”
"I didn't do anything." He says. "The strength is inside you, you just need to find it. Just like you need to stop holding on to the past and let the new you shine for once."
You shake your head. "I need to talk to Jungkook. I don't know why I stormed off like that and..." You trail off. "Wait, how did you know I was here?"
Taehyung grins. "I didn't. I got called in to sort some paperwork and I noticed the back door ajar. Good thing it was you and not some crazy with a baseball bat, right?"
"At this time?" You nod to his still pyjama clad state. "Is it important?"
"Y/N," He laughs lightly. There's excitement shining in his eyes. "Someone just bought the Crestmont."
You scramble to your knees. "What?"
"We're staying open, and I get to keep my job."
And then you're hugging again, and laughing and crying because the Crestmont is going to be okay. You're going to be okay.
"That's incredible, Tae! Who is it? Who bought the Crestmont?"
"I don't know, it was an anonymous transaction. But the guy said he would be here...." He glances at his wrist watch, and as he does, the door creaks open. "Around now."
"Hello? Anyone here?" A familiar voice calls out.
"Jungkook?" Both of your jaws drop as you poke up from behind the seats. Sure enough your heart flutters when you see him, all wind swept and out of breath like he ran here.
"I thought you might be here." He scratches the back of his neck awkwardly. "Can we talk?"
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The car ride to the pier was mostly silent. Jungkook borrowed his dad's old beat up truck -- it was that or his old bike with the pegs on the back -- and it still smelled like leather and petrol like it used to.
Everything about Ocean City is the same as you remember it. The pier stands strong atop the rocky sand, sea air deliciously fresh as it fills your lungs. The rolling waves shimmer like gold dust below the wisps of pink clouds that greet the rising sun. The beach is a peaceful view at this time. No tourists, all of yesterdays sandcastles swallowed by the sea spray. It took a couple hours to work through the paperwork so by now it's early morning — 5:30am according to your phone lockscreen.
It's chilly, and your skin is covered with goose bumps even despite Jungkook's suede jacket wrapped loosely around your shoulders. But you don't mind.
You've missed this. You've missed Ocean City.
"No ice cream, I'm afraid." The breeze ruffles Jungkook's hair as he emerges from the fairground and settles beside you with his legs poking through the rails. He flashes you an apologetic smile. "I guess the parlour doesn't open until 9..."
You feel a pang in your chest. Being here is like a serious case of deja vu. Countless hours spent in this very spot, eating vanilla scoops with rainbow sprinkles beside Jungkook used to be so normal. When did you grow so far apart that you're surprised he even remembers?
"Jungkook..." You swallow hard when you meet his eyes, hands longing to reach out and stroke the stream of sunrise on his cheek that makes his dark eyes sparkle. "We...we need to talk. About everything."
There's a moment of silence filled only by the calls of seagulls greeting the morning before he speaks. "I sold the script."
He sounds nervous. Like he's not quite sure what your reaction will be.
You swallow. "And you used the money to buy the Crestmont?"
"Yeah." He says matter of factly, scratching a phantom itch at his nape. "I guess I did."
"Why?" Your voice is small.
"I can't loose you, Y/N." He murmurs. "Just like you can't loose your mom. The Crestmont was her everything. But you are mine. And loosing the Crestmont would be loosing a piece of you, and I couldn't stand that."
The breeze ruffles his hair as he reaches for your hand and links your fingers and squeezes hard. You don't make any move to stop him. You know what it means, so you squeeze back and return the sentiment. I'm sorry.
Before you can stop yourself you lurch forward, arms curling around his neck and it's like coming home. His hands pull you flush to his chest, hearts beating in sync and you know everything is going to be okay now.
"Thank you." You whisper against his nape. A tear rolls down your cheek and soaks into his collar and before you know it you're blubbering. "Thank you so much, Kook."
"You aren't mad?" His voice is muffled but you can hear the quirk of his brow.
"Mad? No..no..." You lean back and wipe your eyes with your sleeve. "But what about the movie? And your dream to be a director and--"
Jungkook grabs your shoulders. His own eyes are glassy as he tucks a piece of hair behind your ear.
"That was never what mattered to me, Y/N. Not even a little bit. There's one reason I went to New York and it's the same reason I came back to Ocean City tonight. You."
"But--"
"No but's. As long as we're together, I'm already living my dream." His lips turn up into a smile, his eyes tracing your face like it's the first time and he can't get enough. "And I never ever want to wake up."
You shift in your spot to face him properly for the first time, and emotion hits you like a tidal wave. It's like all of a sudden you realize how stupid you've been; to fight with the man before you, a man who only knows kindness, about the trivial when the things that mattered the most were always right here, in front of you. The things that mattered most were always in Ocean City.
You brace your hands on his shoulders and lean up so your lips are inches apart. His eyes fall shut naturally, and you can't help but laugh with what you can only describe as one thing: happiness.
"I love you." You whisper against his lips. A warm palm cups your jaw and closes the distance between them and you're almost too lost in the way Jungkook's kiss takes your breath away to hear his response.
"I love you too."
"Sooo..." You bite your lip with a coy smile when Jungkook pulls away, the blush upon his cheeks scarlet beneath the sun which is rapidly rising. "I take it we're no longer broken up?"
"Well duh," He swats you playfully. "You think I'd do all this just to dump your ass?"
"Hey!" You pout. "I dumped your ass."
Jungkook shakes his head with a laugh.
"Besides," He glances out over the horizon nonchalantly and shrugs. "I'm gonna need help if I'm gonna start my own film company and run the Crestmont."
Your jaw drops. "A what now?"
"A film company." He explains. "A different type of film company, right here in Ocean City. For the outcasts like me who have a vision that even the biggest names in New York can't see yet." He smiles, so big and bright it makes your heart leap. "I'm gonna show them, Y/N. And everything I need to do it is right here in Ocean City."
"I know you will. I never doubted you for a second." You take his hand and link your fingers, squeezing hard. "And you bet your ass I'll be front row to watch each and every one, Jeon Jungkook."
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Epilogue.
"Just keep your eyes shut!"
"I already know where we're going, so why can't I look?" You laugh, attempting and failing to tug Jungkook's interlocked fingers away from your eyes.
"Shush, it's a surprise! Just roll with it."
A surprise. That's what Jungkook said earlier too when he woke you up at the crack of dawn by throwing a dress at your head and telling you to meet him outside in the truck in 10 minutes or else.
By the time you pulled up into the familiar parking lot of your not-so-mysterious destination, the sky was already aflame with the glow of morning skimming the horizon, and Jungkook practically leapt out of the truck, palms unusually sweaty as he grasped your hand and pulled you towards the path quicker than your feet could carry you.
"What's the hurry, Kook?" You get out between heavy breaths, quads burning as the path gets steeper beneath your feet.
Come to think of it, your boyfriend has been acting strangely all week. Like hiding things behind his back when you walk into a room or talking in hushed whispers on the phone to Taehyung when he thought you were sleeping.
"You'll see." The path levels out and you stop. Jungkook wraps his arms around your waist, chin tucked into the cleft of your shoulder like a perfect puzzle piece. "Okay. Now you can look."
You round the corner, heart racing when your eyes flutter open and your vision is filled with a sea of yellow flowers. Your place.
The meadow is just how you left it, tall grass and sunny blooms dancing beneath the rays of morning sun peeking out from between the clouds. A warmth spreads through your chest and you both laugh when Gureum lets out an excited yelp, before bounding off between the stems playfully.
"I think the little guy wants us to follow him." Jungkook raises a brow and throws you a knowing shrug.
Excitement flutters in your stomach like a butterfly trapped between cupped palms. "How could I refuse?"
Fingers interlinked, you part the sunflowers and jog after the ball off fluff bouncing across the meadow, the breeze cool and forgiving as it ruffles the strands of hair that billow behind you.
Eventually you reach the clearing, and Gureum wags his tail at you proudly when you stoop down to scratch him behind his ears.
The sun reflects in Jungkook's eyes, turning them a warm golden brown. "Turn around."
You spin on your heels with a questioning glance. "Why?" That's when you see it. The spot where everything began. The tree where Jungkook kissed you all those years ago has bloomed with fragrant blossoms, and twinkle lights glow like tiny stars around it's branches. A blanket is laid out in the sun flecked shade beneath it, littered with feather cushions and lanterns and a trail of sunflower petals that begin at your feet.
"You did this?" You take his chin in your palms, face beaming despite the tears that have started to blur your vision. "Oh, Kook."
"Surprise." He smiles knowingly, grabbing you from behind and spinning you round and round until you both land with a soft thump in the middle of the outdoor cushion fort. "You haven't even seen the best part yet." He says with a nod to his right.
It's then that you notice the white sheet that's strung up a couple meters away between the trunks of two trees, Jungkook's vintage projector set up in front of it.
"What is this?" You ask, bewilderment evident in your voice.
"Gureum, would you do the honours?" Jungkook chuckles, extending a finger to point at a remote that your puppy obediently picks up with his teeth and drops into your lap with a wag of his tail.
Jungkook tucks a piece of hair behind your ear and takes a deep breath, like he's been waiting for this moment for a long time. "Go ahead. Press play and find out."
Your head shakes fondly, but your fingers tremble with anticipation as they find the PLAY button. You press it and the projector starts turning, a light flicking on at the top that makes a grainy image appear on the sheet.
The first scene is you. A teenager, dancing through the sunflower field, laughter spilling from your lips. The first time you hung out. And then it switches. You, again. Cleaning up a spill at the Crestmont, unaware of the camera. You. Paint in your hair as Jungkook chases you around the apartment in New York. You. Tears in your eyes as you hold baby Gureum for the first time. You. Asleep on Jungkook's shoulder on the subway, the camera panning to his face which lights up in a big grin, lips mouthing three words.
I love you.
Tears are hot on your cheeks, laughing as you remember the good moments and the bad, the funny and the sad, all immortalized forever through Jungkook's eyes.
The film fades out, and you throw your arms around your boyfriends neck. He chuckles when you tackle him to the ground, throwing a leg over his lap so that you can lean down and capture his lips between yours in a kiss that says all the words you want to say but you don't know how to. I love you too.
"I take it you liked it, then?" Jungkook says coyly, thumb stroking your cheek.
"It was beautiful Jungkook." You place your hand over his. "Now I know why you're always goddamn filming me."
"What can I say? You're my muse."
"Shut up." You punch him playfully. "You're gonna make me blush."
It's Jungkook's cheeks that flush pink. "Actually..." He starts to sit up, fumbling around in his back pocket. "There's something else."
"Oh?"
He clears his throat. "The first time we came to this place I knew I loved you. Back then, I said I wanted to show you what I found most beautiful. And it was you. It's always been you." He takes your hand, grip tight. "When we met we were just kids with big dreams. We might be older now but heck -- I still don't know what I'm doing. All I know is dreams come and go but you never left. You always stayed by my side. Which is why I want to promise you something."
"What, Kook?" You manage to whisper. Your heart is beating a million miles a minute in your ears. Is this what you think it is?
Jungkook swallows hard, eyes boring into yours.
"That I'll go wherever you go. New York, across oceans, up mountains -- you name it. As long as we're together, everything will be okay. So that's why I wanted to ask..." His fingers tremble as he produces a tiny black box, flicking it open to reveal a ring that sparkles see through in the sun. "Y/N, will you marry me?"
"Oh Jungkook," You throw your arms around his neck, overcome with emotion now as you capture his lips with your own. "Of course I'll marry you. You didn't even have to ask."
He lets out a sigh of relief, and then he's spinning you around in circles until you're both dizzy with love and belly laughter.
"I love you." He whispers, eyes shiny. His hand gently grasps your wrist as he slides the ring onto your finger.
You've heard him say it a hundred times before, but this time it's different. This time it's forever. Your heart flutters.
"I love you too, Kook."
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Where there are new beginnings
Ocean City is the same as it always was.
You wake up each morning to the distant crash or waves, and you fall asleep each night to the tinkling fairground music that makes your heart sing. Tourists come and go, flooding the casinos and eating churros on the beach.
The Crestmont is doing better than ever. Once Taehyung took over as owner, the theatre became the heart of the city, attracting visitors from near and far to see the renowned plays directed by none other than Jeon Jungkook, the most sought after playwright and filmographer in all of the East Coast.
And then there's you. Ever since you starred in one of Jungkook's plays, about a girl from a seaside city moving to New York with big dreams, there's been no shortage of movie deals and acting opportunities thrown your way.
But in the end, you always find yourself coming back to Ocean City.
Tonight the Crestmont reopens for business after some much needed renovations. Taehyung is throwing a party, and there will be plenty of big Hollywood faces attending to see the brand new theatre and the updated __.
But one thing will always remain the same. The picture of your mom hung in the gallery. Her big smile is the heart of the Crestmont, greeting each and every visitor with pride.
And in the empty frame at the end of the wall of fame, there's a new picture.
You. Smiling, with your hair over one shoulder, just how you imagined. And beside you is Jungkook, with his arm wrapped around your waist and Taehyung holding Gureum and making a silly peace sign behind your head.
And you wouldn't have it any other way.
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Okay so hi if you’re still here!! I decided to put this at the end because I didn’t wanna spoil the ending so please send love to @brekkiejeon​ !! They sent me the request for the ending of this fic all the way back in January and i’m trash and took like 7 months to finish writing it so i hope you enjoyed it even so lovely !!! <3 thank you for the request and sorry for the wait, this one really got me creative lol! 
Also I’d like to dedicate the smut in this fic to @atastefulwonderland​ because I know you love some good ole JK loving!! Hehe, ily~~
Also lemme know if this was bad because I never usually give OC so much backstory because I want it to be as relatable to the reader as poss obvi but these characters wrote themselves lmao like i’m just the writer i had no control okay???? I just do what these mfkers say. LOL.
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kkyujikoo · 3 years
Text
These are my... 2...? Maybe 50, cents about the whole "freejk" thing. I'm gonna be extremely petty and at some points a whole lot sarcastic and it's gonna be long but I had to say it. As soon as I get my computer I'm gonna make it under read more, but the app does whatever it wants, as we know.
Listen, this ain't my first fan rodeo, and not even the first fan rodeo where I've been directly or indirectly accused of being some sort of pervert or delulu. I've been in fandom spaces since I was a teen, I was shipping mlm couples when queerbaiting in TV shows was still something that was seen as the norm rather than some cheap disgusting trick. I was there when fanfic spaces saw "slash" fics as something "different" and to be tagged with a more mature rating even when they just looked at each other.
I was in BBC's Sherlock's fandom and I shipped Johnlock during the hiatus between S3 and S4, at this point I'm not even feeling it when people call me delulu or a weirdo.
So, yeah, take this with a grain of salt: as a person who has seen thousands of times fandom drama unfolding and has lived too much of it... This whole situation is so ridiculous it makes me laugh. Like, yeah, it's maddening how people will blame anyone and everyone because they don't even see their own bias and homophobia, granted, but like... It also makes me laugh for the sheer dumbassery of the reasoning behind it all?
Like... Y'all are getting mad and for what? Because it sure as hell isn't the invasion of privacy, since y'all are watching the same content we're all watching and you're paying to see it the same way everyone else is. If you don't want to "invade their privacy", you should just... Stop watching content that isn't their music videos, RUN episodes or interviews. Memories and any kind of dvd/video that shows what they're doing behind the scenes shouldn't be part of their job as musicians, and therefore we're intruding in their privacy... Or aren't we?
Or maybe it's more nuanced than that: maybe the content they release on dvd/on their official channels is part of their job as entertainers, and it's been approved, and it's a small window THEY are granting us.
You know what's the REAL invasion of privacy and what REALLY invalidates someone autonomy? When you, who maybe aren't even paying to see that content (which is something I understand, like, dude, I'm not covered in money either), DEMAND what kind of behind the scenes content you want when I swear ABSOLUTELY NO ONE has asked you. Once again: you don't like it? You think it's some huge invasion of privacy? Don't buy it. Don't interact with it. Convince your friends to do the same. For all I care, just go and petition to boycott this kind of content. I know you won't do it, because... That's the thing, isn't it? It's not the invasion of privacy that bothers these people.
Y'all aren't mad because we get into their business or else you would have gotten real mad when we were privy to REAL private moments like people crying their hearts out.
No, no. Y'all are mad because it's "shipping content" and "fanservice" which apparently bothers you because it lacks authenticity.
Pick a side, lovelies: either you DON'T want to invade their privacy, and thus all the content they release should be focused on what fans want to see, or you WANT to know how they interact TRULY in private.
And here's the catch: "shipping content" can be anything. Shipping existed WAAAAAYYY before the word for it was invented, same way with fanfictions. Shipping means, literally, "seeing two (or more) people interact and thinking they would make a good romantic pair". That's it. That's quite literally it. Everything else is just some nuance of the concept of shipping, but at its core, it's nearly impossible to ban all shipping content when it's a group of seven people, because they should for real go in social distancing mode to do so. Most people who have parasocial relationships tend to have "ships" whether they know it or not, because we've all, at least once, looked at a dynamic from the outside and thought "oh man they look cute together". So, even if, o dear ones, your wishes were granted... What the hell do you mean by "shipping" content? Should they just film solo clips, avoiding talking about the other members? But wouldn't that be fanservice, since it's focused on pleasing the fans? (Which, ultimately, is what fanservice MEANS, and I hate to break it to y'all but the whole concept behind entertainment and thus all the content BTS releases it's... For the fans. Like, they're not going out of their way to just meet our expectations but they're certainly doing fanservice by the mere act of releasing bonus content.)
But it's not even quite that, is it? Because no one bats an eye if it's Tae kissing Nj's cheek. I've seen no hashtag against everyone - and I mean literally every one of them - wolf whistling at Nj. It's okay to show intimacy... Because they're bandmates and it's okay to be close to someone who you see basically 24/7, I hear you. And it's also okay when people see that and gush over that closeness, because it's such a nice thing to see.
Soooooo... We've got to free JK from whom exactly? From what?
Are y'all mad cause people pointed out there's very little way a bruise that stayed for a whole ass night could be a quick bite? Because that doesn't harm jk, at most makes fun of him and jimin and their poor excuses (seriously, guys, next time consider using mosquitoes or "I was doing stuff". It'll be equally embarrassing but at least the meme will be funny), and it's literally... A fair observation. Like. It's a hickey, people are gonna make jokes about seeing a hickey and poor excuses of covering it up in the exact same way they're gonna make jokes over jimin falling out of chairs. And yeah, a hickey is AT LEAST something that happens in a sensual context. Like, I could understand "people who are extremely familiar with each other will have different body language/touch in areas where usually you wouldn't see friends touching each other", but that's not. Not a hand on the thigh. It's a hickey on the neck. I don't even know a more stereotypical placing for a hickey. But once again, are y'all mad because someone is pointing it out? Because that's not being delulu or even being a shipper, really, it's just commenting on something that was approved to be shown and discussed in something that was released BY THEM.
Are y'all mad at hybe for showing something that literally fell onto their hands? Cause like, unless someone (I'm counting on Jimin, since as we know Jungkook was busy spinning him round and round and had both his hands busy) called at hybe headquarters to say "yo bang pd substitute, is it okay if I give my friend jk here a hickey? Cause he's being really annoying rn and he has to pay", I highly doubt anyone expected Jungkook to come to rehearsal all neatly marked up. Or idk, maybe someone at hybe asked them "we need Jungkook to come in with a hickey but refuse to say it's a hickey, so that fans will feel reeeeally served." That sounds perfectly plausible too. Or a good marketing strategy.
Now, if you're a big company and your objective is to have some footage of the rehearsals for a concert, and the fandom is too good at noticing stuff for their own good, and one of your artists comes in with a very visible mark, and he and his bff bropal4lyfe come n with a story about how they were playing and a bite happened, you've got three choices: 1. Cut the artist out of aaaaalll the footage. Someone would have noticed the "bite mark" anyway, you best believe that. If you don't want anyone to notice it, you gotta cut him in most of the footage where it's visible. 2. Keep the hickey, discard the explanations. You could do that, but also it would feel a lot more unfaithful to everyone involved. Also they clearly worked their ass off to invent an explanation, come on! They truly tried to do their best inventing something that was not "it's a mosquito bite", they should get some credit! 3. Keep the bite, keep the explanation.
Notice how none of these solutions include the biting never happening because... They couldn't prevent it? The only thing they have any control over is how they're framing each "accident". And that's not an easy job.
I applaud you, people on the editing team.
So... On whom should we cast the blame now? Ah, yes, I think it's finally time for the ultimate scapegoat of this fandom: Jimin. Which is funny, cause... You know... If this were really about privacy, or being "victims" of shipping... This should be about freeing him too, you know? But obviously Jimin does it for attention, while Jungkook, poor angel that he is, doesn't even know what shipping is.
Furthermore, don't we all know how much Jimin imposes himself in Jungkook's life? To the point where he, multimillionaire man feels compelled to share a car with Jimin even if they're both late in the process. And can't you see how uncomfortable he is, draping himself over Jimin, making Jimin drap himself over him?
Oh lordy, truly such an awful eight years Jungkook spent, choosing to have vacations with someone who made him uncomfortable, spending free time with him, even having to suck his ear in public to the point you can see his saliva just because Jimin was sad :( truly an all-around bad time for Jungkook, as evidenced by alllll those times when he said Jimin was pretty, cute, and all-around knowing every little thing about Jimin. I absolutely concur, the dude would be so much more happy if jimin was not in his life.
Did that sound weird and absolutely ridiculous and a really absurd joke? Because that's what y'all sound like to me. Like. Jungkook is out there living his best life, getting hickeys and showered in affection and y'all paint him as a fucking martyr??? I'm sure he's really truly desperate that Jimin holds him in such high regards 😭😭😭 I can see him suffering whenever he starts doing his own serendipity rendition 😭😭 and when he claimed you are me, I am you as his and Jimin's only 😭😭😭 I cannot believe this poor baby 😭😭😭
I've reached a point where every time I hear this stuff I laugh because the levels of twisting reality when it comes to jikook are extraordinary, Jungkook will have a literally blissed out face and people will cry in outrage.
But coming back to my point: let's pretend you're not mad at Jimin and the possibility that jikook are dating: are y'all mad... At the hickey? Because at this point it seems like the only feasible solution. And if you are, do not worry: I'm sure Jungkook's skin was throughly healed by his boo. A kiss soothes even the worst pain, doesn't it?
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nightswithkookmin · 2 years
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Please line up and kiss my 🍑
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I've been vindicated yet again my God good stay classy Jehovah you are daebak
[220109 J-hope Weverse Comment]
💜 if you go drinking with jin-oppa, are you going to post/upload a picture??
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🐿 if jin-hyung gives me permission to😝 https://t.co/6t0nFFxiTK
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It's the if Jin gives me permission to post for me.
Boundaries. Respect. Consent. These are the foundation for any wholesome relationship.
What BTS do outside schedule is not up for public consumption and no one is entitled to it until they share it themselves.
Now yall tell me if it sounds so crazy that either Jikook will post anything relating to the other without their consent.
Now revisit all the toxic ship moments we've glorified from the Jungkook hugs me to sleep and whispers I love you to which Jungkook responded he didn't want his business told out like that. The actual shock he experienced when JM said he loves waking up to see JK's face- Listen I love me some Park Jimin yea but whew does that man straddle the line.
The funny thing is their friendship survive and thrive where others have sunk so low to tickle the devil's forehead🤧
Jimin will out his man but God forbid his man outs him back😩
Me I will always say, if JK is not Jikooking when he's supposed to its because a certain hyung is not permitting him to regardless of how you think that hyung carries himself on camera. I said what I said.
From a certain birthday post to whatever.
Does JK sometimes hold out on him to his frustration? Absolutely. Man is a menace. Probably what used to push Jm to kiss and tell on him those days 😩
Imagine screwing someone and everyone claiming he hates you. Will give anyone a complex 🤣
Not sure if they've always respected eachother's boundaries in bangtan or if this is recent efforts to improve their relationship dynamics but it's healthy. I approve.
Certainly makes Jungkook talking bout that neck bite so publicly sus💀
Dude don put his man on the spot like that whew.
He did the same with their Taxi fight during Festa Lmho.
They were made for eachother.
I'm out of popcorn. Will be in the kitchen all day tomorrow making some. There's never a dull moment in Jikook land.
Imma need Tae and JM to show me receipts of Jungkook acquiescing to them posting his selca's with them😏
And yes I know all the arguments you gonna raise but I don't care🤣
Jk posting ttk means he approves yadda yadda but certainly not that cropped photo cos he certainly overrode JK's decision🤕🤷🏾‍♀️
I've seen Jungkook write a whole ass apology tweet after posting JM without permission. I'm gonna assume they pre approve of eachother's photos before they post- I mean JM must have learned his lesson after what happened with Tae?????
And yes I know sometimes they just messing with eachother 🤭
I wonder if hybe posts with their consent on each project 💀💀💀💀💀
First Taejin and now Hopejin😏
Love collecting my receipts 🤭
Oh my ass is ready🍑😊
GOLDY
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rubecso · 3 years
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I liveblogged that Greg Ellis video and now you can suffer with me
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So I did not intend to watch the whole of Greg Ellis’ rant, but I guess I’m a masochist. I ended up liveblogging it so here, you can get the highlights without having to sit through 37:55 like I did. ETA: Holy shit, it got privated in the time it took me to copy this out. I might be one of the last people to watch it. What did I do to deserve this honour.
holy shit I'm on the video that Greg Ellis did in Cullen's voice and the like-dislike ratio is 124:1.4k
What the fuck this is 37:55 long?????
How did he bitch for 37:55??????????
HOLY SHIT 56 seconds in and he's talking about a 'mob of social justice warriors' wtf????
guys my soul has left my body
"Integrity is earned in turmoil, not simply asserted in comfort" what the fuck is this hasfdk;lsfdajlksfda;lksfda;sfda
HE IS TALKING ABOUT TWITTER DRAMA LIKE ITS A FANTASY WAR I CAN'T
"Join us on this most magnificent morality quest" WHAT
"Help us banish the reputation savages ((savagers?)) and cancel culture hedonists"
sfdsajklsfda this keeps getting weirder what the fuck
"Intellectual glitterati" he can't keep doing this
he can't keep making it weirder
i can't take it
i just can't
he's literally reading an Intellectual Dark Web manifesto in the voice of his character with Dragon Age background music and a bunch of hamfisted references to the dragon age world and general fantasy tropes
HE'S TALKING ABOUT THE CHIVALRIC CODE
"How can men and woman, who are profoundly different from one another, be equals? ~~Chivalry~~~"
I can't he's still voice acting he's acting this like he's actually voicing an emotional scene in the game i fucking can't
THE FUCKING MUSIC RAMPING UP UNDER HIS DRIVELLING BULLSHIT
"Join me, for this new adventure. Like. Follow. Subscribe."
If you aren't listening to this please please just imagine all this said with the upmost sincerity. Like, if you've done Cullen's romance picture it as the voice he used for the really emotional scenes.
Oh fuck I'm gonna listen to this whole thing, aren't I?
He's... he's talking about Johnny Depp and Pirates of the Caribbean
In Cullen's voice
Why is Cullen talking to me about Johnny Depp
He's talking about some time when him and another voice actor tried to hold an event where I guess they could try and launder their image after supporting JK Rowling?
Anyway this leads to him saying: "None of the mob showed up. Why..... WHY???"
THE PREGNANT PAUSES
THE INTERSECTIONAL MOB
OH god another "WHY???"
His voice quavering with OTT emotion
Fuck he really does want to be JBP, huh?
He's literally just bitching about people not showing up to his events now
“THE CANCELLATION OF CULLEN RUTHERFORD”
I CAN'T THIS IS JUST TOO FUNNY
OKay now he's just playing a propaganda film he made about the BLM protests??
Okay back to the cringe now
"In response to one angry mobster, Greg stated that every life has value~~~~~~..."
Okay I have now heard Cullen Rutherford say "All lives matter" with 100% sincerity
"We are living in an era of woke capitalism, in which companies pretend to care about social justice to sell products to people who pretend to hate capitalism."
Okay but like... you know that the 'capitalism' part of that is the problem and not the 'social justice' part right?
"Vile and LIBELOUS messages followed. They were posted online by a SELECT FEW..."
ooooooooh he's on to bitchiing about Mark Darrah this ought to be good
"Not to defend Greg or Cullen from the libelous and ridiculous aspersions...."
DUDE YOUR CHARACTER DIDN'T NEED DEFENDING WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT????
Okay my chances of ever not hating Cullen have dissolved now, sorry this is all I'll hear when I hear his voice now
"And giving these negative nnnnnnincompoops exactly what they demanded..."
He literally drew out the 'n' in 'nincompoops'
"This post... had 6 likes. One of two comments.... was posted...." *dramatic reveal voice* ".... by MARK DARRAH"
"Mark Darrah... is the worst kind... of corporate coward. He has :’( no code..... of honour :’("
there are 10 minutes left i'm going to die
OKAY i have now heard Cullen Rutherford, commander of the inqusition, say the words "Go woke, go broke"
"One doesn't challenge The Maker.... without consequences"
I think the Maker here is Bioware?????
"Greg and Cullen were summarily lumped together.... and generalised!!!"
DUDE CULLEN IS NOT REAL
YOU CANNOT LUMP HIM IN WITH ANYONE
WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT
HE DID IT AGAIN
HE PUT "THE CANCELLATION OF CULLEN RUTHERFORD" TWICE
"The racist trolls came out of the woodwork to cancel Cullen, once... and for ALL!"
"I stand... for HUMAN... RIGHTS :’’’’’’’’’’’’(“ IT'S A VIDEO GAME CHARACTER
"BLACK.... LIVES... MATTER.” *long pause* “AND THEY DON'T MATTER MORE..... THAN ANYONE.... ELSE’S."
Yes. Correct. You are correct. Well done.
*insert the ‘You’re Correct Horse’ video*
"I love.... I ~~~~~love~~~~~~.... everyone "
"So yes.... alll... LIVES... DO... INDEED.... MATTER.... TO MEEEEEEE~~~~~~”
"This moment of history is harsh and merciless.... and in this moment.... I'm choosing.... LOVE"
HE'S LITERALLY JUST REPEATED THE 'WOKE CAPITALISM' LINE FROM EARLIER WORD-FOR-WORD
"Mobbing.... is social murder!"
"And by definition.... people cannot survive their own murder!"
(Again, just imagine his voice breaking with ~~~~~~~emotion~~~~~~~ on that line)
"How do we move from hateful to grateful????"
(The worst part is I know that this shit is going to be convincing to some people and that makes me actually sad)
"Exercise from the neck-up, during this.... PANIC-DEMIC!"
HE'S QUOTING CULLEN I FUCKING CAN'T
"As fans eagerly and patiently await the release of Dragon Age 4, and hope for the inclusion of their ~~~~beloved~~~~~~ Cullen" 
*vomit*
okay now he's just telling Cullen's backstory?
I'm guessing this is going to lead somehow into the whole "DON'T BE MEAN TO ME FOR THE SHITTY THINGS I DID IN THE PAST!!!!" thing?
Okay no he just... said it and then moved on?
"Only time.... and the Maker... will tell”
THAT’S IT
what the fuck i am going mad help
this video should come with a warning I got sucked in and trapped for half an hour
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