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pesterloglog · 4 months

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Dave Strider, Dirk Strider, Jake English

Meat, page 5

DAVE: bro im watching you on the tube and i gotta say

DAVE: while the beatdown you just received was as thorough as it was humiliating im afraid as usual the solution to this problem should probably not involve your decapitation

DAVE: you fucking drama queen

DIRK: Damn.

DIRK: Are you sure?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: jake just kicked your ass

DAVE: thats really all there is to say on the matter

DIRK: You’re probably right.

DIRK: But still not entirely sure we should be so quick to rule out my beheading as a catchall solution to any given problem.

DIRK: It really could save us all a lot of trouble in the future. Especially me.

DAVE: its really amazing how this meme we have going here continues to be exactly as funny as the day it was established

DIRK: Isn’t it always though?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: by the way

DAVE: how DID you get your ass kicked so bad

DAVE: jake sucks and his raps are fucking awful

DAVE: please tell me this garbage show is as rigged as it looks

DIRK: Dave, there’s such a thing as showmanship.

DIRK: I’m sure I don’t need to explain this to you, of all people.

DAVE: ok cool its fake just making sure

DIRK: Sigh.

DIRK: We really don’t like to use that word.

DAVE: lmao ok

DIRK: Holding back a little to achieve certain results doesn’t necessarily mean you’re participating in a farce or rigging the event.

DIRK: We do this all the time. We hold back our thoughts, our true feelings, our full potential. We disguise how much we know about what and when, for many purposes. To ease relations, to let others behave naturally and make up their minds without undue intervention. To wait for the right moments to show our hands, to pick our battles.

DIRK: In life, there are many reasons to show restraint, which would never be regarded as an attempt to rig reality.

DAVE: oof

DAVE: my dog you are full of some SHIT today arent you

DIRK: Absolutely.

DIRK: And when it comes to theater, there are just as many reasons for restraint. To build tension. To set the stage. To give the people someone to root against.

DAVE: is that what youre doing now

DAVE: making people root against you

DIRK: What, by losing a round? No, man. That’s just standard pacing stuff when it comes to battlecraft.

DAVE: no i mean by holding up the whole fight by talking to me

DAVE: i can see you on tv

DAVE: theyre booing you dude

DIRK: Oh.

DIRK: Then yes, I guess that is what I’m doing.

JAKE: Dirk are you going to be much longer with your telephone call?

JAKE: The crowd is getting feisty... you didnt get too badly winded from our last scrum did you dirk?

DIRK: Haha, no Jake. I’m fine. I’ll just be a minute.

JAKE: What about the agitated rabble? Theyre starting to throw things.

DIRK: I don’t know. Do a dance or something. Sing a song.

DIRK: They love anything you do.

JAKE: Ummm.

JAKE: Ok sounds stupid but ill try.

DAVE: why do you want people to hate you so much

DAVE: its fucked up

DIRK: You’re reading way too much into it.

DIRK: If I wanted another round of embarrassingly indulgent and mutually masturbatory psychoanalysis, I would have called my daughter instead.

DAVE: hm

DAVE: do i need to point out how fucking weird what you just said was or can that start going without saying at this point

DIRK: I think it can go without saying.

DAVE: nice

DIRK: The point is, playing myself up as a villain figure in this hacky rap pageant has nothing to do with getting people to dislike me. Besides, everyone loves a good villain. When they boo, they don’t really mean it.

DIRK: I think you’d be surprised by how popular I actually am.

DAVE: i dunno man

DAVE: did...

DAVE: did someone just throw a diaper at you

DIRK: There’s gonna be some diapers, yeah.

DAVE: sounds bad

DIRK: The point is, this is much less about me, and more about providing a foil for Jake’s heroism and charisma.

DIRK: It’s very important that his popularity continues to be cultivated, to maximize his political capital.

DAVE: political capital

DAVE: what the fuck are...

DAVE: ok how long have you known about the jane thing

DAVE: i mean is this something you have been planning for like

DAVE: a long time or

DIRK: Planning is such an intense word.

DAVE: god damn it

DIRK: Look, let’s just say there have been some conversations.

DIRK: Does that meet with your approval?

DAVE: jane is a shitty candidate dude

DAVE: shes going to be so shitty

DIRK: I thought you’d feel that way.

DIRK: I respectfully disagree.

DAVE: i get shes a good friend of yours and all but even you have to admit how far up her own ass she is

DIRK: Of course. I consider it to be among her best qualifications for the job.

DAVE: christ

DAVE: ok if nothing else have you at least taken into account the DEVASTATION to the economy this will cause???

DIRK: You know perfectly well how much we differ on fiscal policy.

DIRK: Maybe this isn’t the best time for one of our epic debates on the subject?

DAVE: yeah what was i thinking

DAVE: wasting the time of the dude currently holding up a televised rap contest so bad hes gettin diapers thrown at him

DIRK: Dave, I think if you search your soul, you’ll come to the same conclusion I have. Jane is just what this planet needs.

DIRK: We’ve all had our fun here, but it’s easy to overlook the fact that civilization on Earth C is hardly a sustainable proposition.

DIRK: Just beneath the surface, it’s quite a dangerous and unstable place.

DAVE: i know that

DAVE: which is why actually i think it would be cool to have a president that is good instead of bad

DIRK: He’s not as great as you think.

DAVE: what

DAVE: who

DAVE: obama??

DAVE: how dare you

DIRK: No, fool.

DIRK: Karkat.

DAVE: oh

DIRK: I think your heart is in the right place, but the dude is a complete amateur.

DIRK: He’ll get eaten alive. I also have a hard time imagining he even wants the job.

DIRK: Really, it’s an awful idea for him to even run. Think about how much it’s going to inflame the interspecies tensions on this planet. Is that what you want?

DIRK: I’m happy for both of you, really. It’s nice that you encourage and support each other in this way. But you’re sending him on a fool’s errand which can only end badly.

DAVE: wait

DAVE: how do you even know hes entering the race

DAVE: we like just decided this

DIRK: A competent political operative has his ways.

DIRK: Besides, it was always pretty obvious to me you’d react this way the moment the announcement was made.

DAVE: ok thats kinda creepy i guess but it doesnt change anything

DAVE: hes running for president and hes going to fuckin win end of story

DIRK: Fair enough.

DAVE: though now im wondering

DAVE: since you and jane have been planning this for a while how many key endorsements have you locked up

DAVE: cause if youve already got jake on your side then i guess we might as well just fucking quit

DIRK: I wouldn’t worry about that.

DIRK: He and I don’t quite have the rapport we once did.

DIRK: He’s “over me” and doesn’t spare opportunities to make ostentatious demonstration of this claim.

DAVE: um

DIRK: Basically he doesn’t like being told what to do. Especially not by me.

DIRK: So it’s fair to say as of now, he’s still fully in play.

DIRK: Not that I should be encouraging you, really.

DAVE: you are one doubletalking son of a bitch you know that

DAVE: i cant tell if you dont want us to run or are reverse psychology mindfucking us into running

DIRK: Does it matter?

DAVE: i guess not

DAVE: not like i can just stand around and wait for president crocker to like

DAVE: write fucking grammar laws into the constitution

DIRK: Good.

DIRK: That’s a heroic attitude to have, which I’m pleased to hear. Even if your plan is stupid, which it is, and even if Karkat would be an atrocious president, which he would.

DAVE: nuh uh

DIRK: Sorry to cut this short, but diapers are starting to come down pretty hard right now, and some of them haven’t even had their babies removed.

DAVE: what

DIRK: That was a joke.

DIRK: Goodbye, Dave.

DIRK: Sorry for the momentary diversion, Jake. Now where were we?

JAKE: Momentary??? Gadzooks man you were on the phone for half a friggin hour!

JAKE: I know you like to get the crowd all hot and bothered but we are supposed to be professionals here!

DIRK: You’re right, my bad. Won’t happen again.

DIRK: How about you kick off the next round?

DIRK: I bet this crowd will settle its shit right down the moment you drop the latest rhymes you’ve been tinkering with.

DIRK: You know the ones.

JAKE: Gasp.

JAKE: You dont mean...

DIRK: Oh. But I DO.

JAKE: Tally ho its me, jake mcgee!

JAKE: Popping my pistols off, two shots and a kiss

JAKE: My aim is tops, i never miss

JAKE: One shot to the heart and the other to your lips

JAKE: Im heedless

JAKE: You cant impede this

JAKE: While these cads are all hat and very little cattle

JAKE: Cattle so weak one fears they might be feedless!

JAKE: As i prattle and digress you try to make your egress

JAKE: In the middle of the battle, but surely ye jest?

JAKE: FIDDLE FADDLE!

JAKE: My rhymes are known to bring the rattle

JAKE: I rattle those bones right down to the bit

JAKE: Im a mellifluous old chap who knows how to take a hit

JAKE: Im the tip...

JAKE: Tip top of the morning!

JAKE: A rip roaring halt to your snoring

JAKE: Like pouring butter on bacon

JAKE: Their hunger awakens!

JAKE: All the rascally scalawags

JAKE: And dastardly jackanapes

JAKE: Always ask of me, mate what is shaking?

JAKE: With golden gas pipes such as jake-eng’s

JAKE: Im dodging their shade and ducking their jape-slings

JAKE: While my rump stokes a thirst that my rhymes have been slaking!

JAKE: When the splendid lads and ladies ask me “how do you do?” i -

DIRK: Whoops. Jake, sorry to cut you off...

DIRK: Looks like I’m getting another call. Really need to take this one.

DIRK: Gonna have to wrap this battle up sooner than scheduled.

DIRK: Yo Rose, what’s up?

#homestuck #homestuck epilogues #dave strider #dirk strider #jake english #meat epilogue #page 5

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a-blu-jay · 3 years

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In the light of the whole doomsday arc and chaos I think it's important to like,,, clarify ? Some points ppl r makin even tho theyre prob not gonna see it.

Also!! This is all /roleplay and talking about the characters not the content creators

Yes, everyone has fucked up. That's what they're ALL going for, especially the ppl takin the lead when it comes to the writin of the script. Everyone is a fucked up character and everyone is a good character with the exception of Dream.

Now to get some more in depth:

Let's start with c!Tubbo. Since the beginning he's been put into tight and bad situations. Watching his friends get exiled, being made a spy for the sake of Intel to win a war which is So Much Pressure, eventually fighting in said war, being made president of the revolutionized country but then immedietly having to rebuild it, later be manipulated to exile his beat friend and brother in arms etc etc. It's a lot of trauma and greif, it's not false to call him a child solider because that's exactly what he is. Schlatt was right, the moment he died the country was doomed, wether that be from Pogtopia, Technoblade, Dream or the inevitability that the leadership would fall onto Tubbo. He's not infallible and he's not experienced. He's a severely Traumatised teenager. But this doesn't necessarily make him a good person.

Next is c!Technoblade because I have some Opinions. He's a fucked up character. Just like everyone else, just in a more transparent way. A lot of the characters hide the bad things they've done in a way to preserve moral righteousness and such. Technoblade has always been clear and transparent he wants nothing more than anarchy, chaos and the fall of L'manburg. Now, acts of terrorism aren't good, they're pretty fucked up. The great thing about his character is that he's so goddman complex. Just like Tubbo and Tommy he's been wronged. And just like Tubbo and Tommy he's a hypocrite. That's what happens when you have morally grey and ambiguous characters. He made his intentions about anarchy clear and Pogtopia made their intentions about Governments clear, they both chose to ignore eachother which in the end made them Hypocrites. A specific point I want to make about Technoblade teaming up with Dream is that Tommy has NEVER been clear with Technoblade with how Dream treated him. Technoblade couldn't have known what Dream did because of Tommy's trauma about speaking about it and Dream's manipulation. Technoblade teamed up with Dream because they shared a common goal, he doesnt trust Dream and has voiced that before. Also! Tommy's point in their argument in the middle of Doomsday was really interesting, he said (I'm paraphrasing) "why can't you just let people love what they love." A thing to note is that Technoblade DID. After the end of the revolution he left to go live in retirment and solitude and let them fight amongst eachother and destroy eachother. The very same Government he predicted to be corrupt then tried to execute him without trial even though they said he'd be given one. Which is a pretty corrupt thing to do. In the end Technoblade was used and just a little bit mistreated but he's not in the right because of that. Again, he can be seen in the lense of a Villain but that doesn't mean he really is one.

Now onto c!Tommy. His character is deffinetly an interesting one! I think his main fault is his own hubris. He's prideful to a default and stubborn when it comes to the idea he could have done something wrong because of how badly he wants to be the/a hero. Now, I'm not saying he HASN'T taken accountability for some things he's said and done because he most certainly has and thus has grown as a character. Another huge fault is his hyperfixation on the emotions and people attached to objects. Honestly? Tubbo logically wasn't wrong, they're just discs. But in Tommy's head they're a symbol of his and Tubbo's friendship. The problem is when he picks these discs over his actual friendship with Tubbo and how Dream has manipulated him. Dream plays a BIG part in why Tommy thinks the discs are so valuable. If you're told enough times and manipulated into thinking objects hold a significant value to the things important to you then eventually they become fiercely important to you and have some weight to them. I think in the beginning, in Tommy's brain destroying the discs meant his and Tubbo's friendship was over because of the part they've played in their friendship. Again, Tubbo only ever saw them as dics, plastic vinyls that drop from mobs and play pretty music. To another point, Tommy is also explicitly Hypocritical, just like Technoblade. He holds onto the fact that Tubbo and L'manburg and it's people are his friends and he cares about him but then calls Technoblade his friend and casts his emotions aside. The problem is the blatant fact that Tommy used Technoblade as a weapon and after being called out that friends don't do that to eachother he ignores it. In this instance he's no better than Technoblade. A kinda big problem is his character development, which really doesn't have a lot to do with c!Tommy and more with how the writers suggest developing him as a character. I think the main thing is that he goes to Tubbo's side saying how the discs never truly mattered to later saying they need the discs. The discs don't matter. What matters is defeating Dream. But just like Tubbo, Tommy is a highly and incredibly traumatised Teenager.

Next is c!Ranboo, the mad lad! I don't really have a whole lot to say? Just some quick analysis of what his characters ideals are and his actions in everything. Looking at his character he's incredibly paranoid, anxious and probably Traumatised from things we the audience don't know. At the end of the day he's a true neutral character. In one of the tweets cc!Ranboo sent it said that as long as Dream isn't hurting the people he (character Ranboo) directly cares about, he doesn't care what Dream does. For a good portion he was against Dream because he cared about everyone nd dream was hurting everyone. He's joined Technoblade and Ph1lza in the Arctic because he thinks that Dream has gotten what he wants, he doesn't know anything about Dream and Tommy's conversation by the end of Doomsday. Also! Ranboo's ideals/beliefs are anarchist by nature and principle. The reason he has a problem with choosing sides between L'manburg and Dream is because of the hierarchy within those sides, and the obligation that you have to fight that comes with picking those sides. Technoblade and Ph1lza both chose to fight under free will and because they chose too without coercion. Everyone is equal there. There's a really good post somewhere talking about it that'll I'll look for that explains it very well. (EDIT: found the post also hopefully i did the link right)

This is getting painfully long so I'm wrapping it up here with a few last things. Everything has always come down to Dream. The reason L'manburg was built was to get away from the oppressive power that is Dream (another point for Technoblade teaming up w dream, he wasn't there for Dreams stuff, he only knew of Schlatt but I digress). Dream has manipulated everyone, he's running the puppet show with the strings tied to his fingers. He's manipulated Tubbo, Tommy, Ranboo, Technoblade, Schlatt, EVERYONE. He's pitted everyone against eachother because he loves the chaos. Because he knows that if they weaken eachother it'll be a lot easier to take control with less effort put in from his part. Dream has always been the main antagonist from the very very beginning. Sure some could say Tommy started it with the discs but Dream was the one who took them in the first place etc.

He's also pitted the audience against eachother. It's really interesting in how he's actually manipulated the audience. It doesn't matter who's on what side or who's wronged who when the cause for all their greif has always been Dream. The fandom is fighting over traitors and betrayals and villain arcs. It doesn't matter, not when Dream is runnin free with the amount of power that he has.

#oooooh boy this is long #srry this is such a wall of text believe me ik theyre hard to read i just #Have Some Thoughts #dream smp spoilers #mcyt #tubbo #technoblade #ranboo #dreamwastaken #LISTEN YALL #THE PHYSCOLOGY BEHIND MANIPULATING THE AUDIENCE #IS FUCKING FASCINATING #IT REMINDS ME OF HOW THE MOVIE MIDSOMMAR REALLY BRAINWASHES YOU #I COULD GO FOR DAYS PLEASE HUMOR ME LMAO #MIGHT TALK ABT PHIL AND SOME OF THE OTHERS IF PPL CARE ENOUGH

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bipirate · 3 years

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i thought it’d be fun to write a post about my thoughts about legend of fei and my experience watching it! if you’ve been following me since i started watching this show you’ll know i’ve been enjoying it a lot and i definitely recommend it if you like romance dramas and historical fantasy genres. however, the show wasn’t perfect and i think it’d be interesting to discuss those things as well. tldr; i do not think a show has to be ‘perfect’ to be good or enjoyable. is it not enough to have wang yibo play a man so bisexual and so singularly devoted to his bisexual blade wielding wife?

disclaimer: i have not read the book it’s based on and i never will

first off, here’s why i loved legend of fei:

the healthy and natural romance progression between xie yun and zhou fei. there’s no weird miscommunication or possessive or otherwise unhealthy behaviour from either of them (except for that one time xie yun used knock out drugs on zhou fei without her knowledge or consent... that sucked). their relationship is based on a healthy foundation of mutual trust, respect, admiration, and of course, banter. and it’s really refreshing to see such a wholesome and gentle relationship with an m/f couple!

the ROMANCE. literally any time xie yun holds a monologue about how much he loves zhou fei. the scene where xie yun does zhou fei’s hair and says he just wants to do her hair for the rest of his life. the almost kiss when theyre at madam nichang’s place. the longing glances. the way they would both die for each other. the way they keep feeding each other food. the entirety of the lantern scene. the red dress. xie yun writing poetry for zhou fei. i can go on

really good and interesting relationship dynamics, and not just between romantic couples! for example: yang jin/li yan/ying hecong, zhou fei and her parents, madam nichang and zhou fei+xie yun, etc. the only drawback is i wish some relationships were explored more, such as yang jin + xie yun, li yan + xie yun, zhou fei + li sheng, li yan + wu chuchu, wu chuchu and... literally everyone except li sheng tbh

this show pushes the bisexual AND the men get pegged agendas and i think that’s very sexy

milfs! women with swords! women without swords or martial art skills still being badass and interesting!

it’s so fucking funny at times. the bath scene where xie yun thinks zhou fei is going to bathe him but she saddles him up with li sheng. the whole episode where the third prince comes to propose to zhou fei, thinking he actually has a chance, and zhou fei using this to tease xie yun. that time xie yun walked into a tree because he was too busy making eyes at zhou fei. ‘i sell talent, not my body’. when zhou fei is like ‘is it illegal to hit the emperor’ and xie yun is like ‘it’s just as illegal as hitting a commoner’ and zhou fei is like ‘good’ and hits him

the unlikely alliance between zhou fei and mu xiaoqiao... that’s her gay uncle! i wish they had more scenes together tbh. also i wish they didn’t use a gay stereotype for a character that’s initially a villain and then dies unceremoniously but also i wouldn’t like him so much if he wasn’t so obviously gay

it’s a given that i love xie yun and zhou fei but i think a surprise fave for me was yang jin, so he deserves a bullet point for himself. i just think he’s delightful. he shows his love and respect by challenging people to a fight. he rubs the back of his head when he’s embarrassed. he’s shy. he’s a himbo. he has a single earring. his blade is huge and has rings pierced into it. his outfits are my favourite of the whole show. he’s bisexual. he has a gf AND a bf. what’s not to love

some things i didn’t really like:

shaky cam and really rough editing in some sections. it’s not always the case and i usually don’t really care about this stuff but some episodes really could’ve been edited better. the scenes at the end of yin pei’s storyline with eyepatch guy were so badly done (but i barely care bc i hate yin pei and i’m glad they rushed those scenes lmao)

the pacing is kinda weird? the build up is very slow at first and it left some things feeling vaguely unresolved. the final battle was over very quick, i expected some more tense moments and problem solving. all in all i think the plot couldve been more condensed, they didn’t need 51 episodes of 50 minutes. also there are some straight up plot holes, like what happened to chuchu’s brother in the end? but i know they had to rush filming because of the pandemic, so who knows what the original intent was

the sidelining of wu chuchu :( i loved how early on in the show she was hanging out with xie yun and zhou fei a lot and i really liked their dynamic. i feel like her character was kind of wasted as soon as they paired her up with li sheng. she still had her moments and i love a lesbian queen but i feel like she could have done a lot more. imagine if she had been with zhou fei and xie yun while xie yun was recovering in penglai. she couldve taken care of xie yun in zhou fei’s absence and served as emotional support for zhou fei. i miss my polycule :(

the entire character of the third prince. he was literally only there to get kidnapped, ruin plans, and propose to zhou fei out of nowhere lmao. at least the latter made for a pretty funny episode

anything to do with yin pei. he barely contributed anything to the plot tbh? you could cut him out and it wouldn’t fucking matter. the decisions he made were incomprehensible. gay legend yin wenlan didn’t adopt this bitch and then died for him to be such a fucking bastard

honestly i thought it was kinda anticlimactic how the heroes and the villains were all looking for the same thing and it was this huge mystery. and you were wondering why the villains were after this thing. and then it turns out it’s just a way to make like, super sharp swords so they can conquer the world. idk it fell kind of flat for me. but then i didn’t get into this show because of the plot if i’m honest lmao

#legend of fei

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romancemoved · 2 years

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iris, rhododendron, and ivy for the headcanons!

✨ @emptyvictory. meme. still accepting!

iris : if your muse could convey one last message to someone they have lost or left behind , what would it be ?

wanna know the crazy thing??? vi’s never... really lost anyone. or left anyone behind. i mean, not to a point where it would affect him deeply. does his ex count in this? virote broke up with him first. he was the one to step out when he couldnt take being treated like shit. and he’d only have one thing to say to anthony: ‘ don’t let me see you out in public. ’ not that he’d do anything, he’d be too frozen in fear. but he’d have something done about it. somehow!!!

rhododendron : is your muse receptive to warnings & advice given by others ?

rarely is he ever given advice due to the fact that hes usually the one giving advice in the first place. and even if he did get advice, he’d be very defiant by nature. hes a very dont tell me what to do type of little man... but in any case, he sure dont listen! and he dont listen to warnings either! dont worry aobut him. worry about yourself. he can handle it. he can take it. dont warn him about anything. there’s a 99% chance he’s thought the situation ahead and is a few steps ahead of you anyway.

and when it comes to taking risks, he weighs his pros and cons. he’ll even warn himself. but it’s a losing argument. everythings been considered. he plays dumb, but his brain is a machine.

ivy : what are your muse’s views on marriage ? do they believe it is something strictly for love , or an institution rooted in business & social benefits ? do they desire or have they desired to be married ?

his parents have a beautiful relationship and he wants to see what its like, too. vi is definitely

prince. the marrying kind.mp3

he will most certainly sit there and fantasize about what kind of wedding he wants. of course, theyre never fancy... if his manz wants something flashy, he’ll go along with it but for the most part he wants something small, intimate, in a garden. small so that u have to focus on what he’s wearing glfkgjdklgjdf. there’s no social benefits in it for him because no one has more than he does and they literally never will unless he encounters another billionaire heir or some shit.

and even then he dont give a fuck about that.

yes he wants to get married so badly... something about it is so alluring to him. virote’s inexperienced with love but omg he wants to get married soooo bad..... hes tryna take up someones last name baybeeeeee.

#( 🌙 ABOUT! AN AURA OF MOONLIGHT AND DARK NEON. ✨ )#emptyvictory #/ he luvs the thought of wedding cake testing too..... give him a fork....

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smalltragedy · 3 years

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* brigette lundy-paine, nonbinary + they/them | you know kirby wormwood, right? they’re twenty five, and they’ve lived in irving for, like, two weeks? well, their spotify wrapped says they listened to ring ring by mika like, a million times this year, which makes sense ‘cause they’ve got that whole balancing acts at perilous heights destined to entertain, jack of all trades master of none, refusal to accept the mortal world as it is thing going on. i just checked and their birthday is december 1st, so they’re a sagittarius, which is unsurprising, all things considered. ( james, 21, est, they/them )

hllo welcome 2 my third character i love them a lot theyre a. remake of an older oc of mine so this is fun <3 sdfhk anyways once again i am asking u. pleathe like if u wld like to plot.

ARSON TW

mini playlist.

wizard ;; lucas lex / ring ring ;; mika / crows ;; clues / sunrise sunset ;; bright eyes / la llorona ;; beirut / no children ;; the mountain goats / might be love ;; the pesky snakes / sax in the city ;; let’s eat grandma.

statistics.

full name: kirby wormwood (currently).

nickname(s): magpie.

birthday: december 1st, 1995.

zodiac: sagittarius sun, aries moon, libra ascending.

mbti & temperament: estp & improvisor / sanguine.

label: the hellion.

hometown: abilene, texas.

sexuality: bisexual.

pinterest.

biography.

alright lets get right into it. kirby ws switched at birth. they cld’ve hd a very like. picket fence trampoline in the backyard. 4 columns cos its texas n it feels right. bt instead they were chosen <3 somewhat unintentionally <3 by dorothea n fawley wormwood, two traveling circus workers who emergency stopped in abilene.

n u know what. growing up in st. pierre’s traveling circus ws kinda fkn awesome? like ok. besides the fact tht they were homeschooled fr like evr n there were a sparing amt of children 2 socialize with? it ws p cool idk.

it ws kinda like everybody ws their parent n also not at all bc they were all very casual. bt they grew up learning hw 2 maintain the circus (n also like. normal school thingz bt i dnt think kirby hs ever cared abt school like ever) n whenever they hd a show kirby wld facepaint or handle tickets until they were old enough 2 start learning like. the Real fun things.

fawley hd a lot of his own weird odd little like superstitions n beliefs n practically raised kirby on them like n they dnt rly <3 make a lot of sense. lots of made up philosophy. very much like. nothing defines u. u cn b anything or anyone. n kirby ws like ok cool. n then developed a god complex.

names didnt rly stick 2 kirby when they were a kid like. nothing satisfied them or felt worthy fr them or simply they just. got tired of a name. this isnt related 2 them being nonbinary BUT it did help ease some of the. pressure of exploring gender identity. theyve only hd one name tht stuck genuinely n tht ws magpie n. thts bc everybody hd their own bird name n it felt very. like community. like a role. usually the names they used during performances bt. anyways KFHDSGLKKHL

theyre Kirby bt answers 2 most. neutral nouns.

honestly. they were also a rascal as a youth. ws like. oh. i learned sleight of hand? cool. time 2 pick pockets. wld throw popcorn into the hair of other kids n b like. omggg what was that ... became a mime fr a year. it ws a rigorous training.

now a master of charades. bt anyways. they traveled pretty much weekly, maybe bimonthly n sometimes just pure monthly. there wsn’t an off season fr them, when the colder months came they’d travel south and when summer rolled in they’d go right back up again. it ws easy to switch personas almost daily n just. never reveal ur true self. totally not saying tht’s what kirby did bt thts what they did. it nvr made them lose sight of themselves it ws more like. acting. tricking ppl fr fun.

anyways all good things come 2 an end and when kirby ws like. 18. they were like hey ur old enough that we cn trust u with fire. we think. n they started 2 learn fire-throwing n like. they were ok at it bt lessons were painfully slow n kirby ws like. i wld b so good at this if i cld do it all the time. n it ws like. hey kirby, chill. u already know a lot of things.

arson tw // u see where this is going. tents are kind of flammable. kirby ws unsupervised. bad decisions all around. circus is aflame. all the animals n all the circus workers got out fine bt like. st. pierre’s ws efficiently out of business. arson end of tw //

n kirby fkn booked it they just. ran. pure fear. nvr looked back which is like super traitorous of them 2 do bt. sometimes they meet up in secret like. sunglasses n all at a coffee shop. not all of them just like. fawley or someone else. theyre like. ur family u cld burn down a thousand circuses n we’d still love u. n kirby is like yeah i know bt i’ve rly committed to the bit now. n they dnt reunite.

anyways. since then kirby hs just been. a traveler. nvr rly staying anywhere fr super long n driving around in their shitty little van tht’d been used as housing back at st. pierre’s.

they’re in irving n theyve been there fr almost. suspiciously long. compared 2 their average stays. when asked abt what they do or why theyre there theyll just. give a vague answer or spin a long tale tht usually involves a burning circus.

theyre staying at uh. abernathy creek rn bc of course they r they fit in so naturally. welcomed with wide arms. might b soul searching rn might b on the hunt fr their birth parents might b just vibing ... whose to say ..

personality & facts.

has a Big personality tht attracts others fr better or fr worse. either super likeable or the most despicable person on the earth. no in betweens. n honestly tht is a talent in itself

has no off button is constantly. spinning tales or performing a dance or getting kicked out of bars fr whatever nonsense reason.

honestly they prob think tht nothing bad cn ever happen to them even tho like. bad has literally happened 2 them before? love the optimism here. KLFGDLKFSDHGF

acts a bit like u’ve known them fr ur entire life they r oddly warm in tht way bt they themself r so distant tht its like. oh nice ok ...

both honest n yet dishonest like. yes they will hustle u out of ur money bt they will also tell u their opinion straight up.

probably smart bt they r just like. prime thembo? flowy pirate shirts n cropped tshirts n pants tht r never tight. dresses like they do still work n live at a circus.

likes 2 instigate things between others n then stand back n just watch it happen while taking like zero accountability. loves a good small town drama. avid milf hunter.

does not hv any faith in the american healthcare system at all n will straight up refuse 2 go 2 a hospital if they get hurt theyre like. i cn do it myself im like practically a professional. they r not a professional.

bt does hv like. a thing abt apples. fkn loves them.

uuuhhh cn play instruments bt all very badly. only knows one (1) song tht isnt made up n its wonderwall by oasis. they play it at parties. they expect fr tomatoes to b thrown at them at any given time.

very nimble. agile. granted its frm. learning circus tricks frm a baby age bt they hv impeccable balance n cn sneak up behind anyone without a single noise. uses this 2 their advantage in order 2 scare ppl. chaotic neutral.

loves having the attention on them i wont fk around here. will go to drastic measures to accomplish receiving it. my other muses r capable of taking things srsly bt kirby just. is not. they do not take a single thing srsly they barely even took. st. pierre’s destruction srsly n they caused it. maybe.

likes being able to just. be unknown so the amt tht ppl know abt them is actually very. little. i dnt think they even tell others their last name. sometimes not even their first. just hs so many aliases n nicknames. i know i didnt list any bt thts simply bc Any cld.

probably acts out to compensate fr the. underlying guilt they hv bt thts okay. i mean it isnt bt.

will probably show up if u call them fr help bt they lose interest in people p quickly n r always moving onto the next shiniest person. bt when they do they give them like. all their attention. if u wrong them in this period they will just. ignore it. bt when theyre bored then its like. u werent even friends at all? very odd.

perhaps it is commitment issues bt <3 ya. thts them. they do not claim favorite colors or movies or. most interests. probably bc theyre very very disconnected frm pop culture i think they learn everything thru twitter n google.

i wld not call them a good person bt i also dnt think theyre like evil horrible nasty awful they just. think abt themself a lot more than they think abt others n also refuses to face consequences ever and also .. anyways.

wanted plots.

part of the bird’s nest ;; honorary bird honorary circus member. u hv to be very well regarded by kirby to earn a bird name bt i feel like tht doesnt feel like a lot considering theyve only been here fr like. two weeks KDGDSHKGK. the catch is tht u cn only refer 2 them as magpie frm then forward.

hand in unlovable hand ;; theres comfort in being terrible ppl together n it may not last bt it doesnt hv to anyways. its just them n the like. vibes. n knowing tht its smth thts nvr gna b long term. cld b anything ur character just hs to be also a little evil. KHDSGFDS

one jester ... wht abt ... TWO jesters .. ;; hoo boy. ooh man. unstoppable force and immovable object combine forces n just become. the worst of the worst. ultimate jokesters. epic pranksters. absolute clowns. chaotic energy unmatched. always nonsense.

n also ;; ppl they’ve stolen frm, ppl who hv caught them in that act, ppl who’ve maybe seen them in the circus a very long time ago, Found Family Trope, real family shenanigans, kirby just asking everybody if theyre their dad., mortal enemies if they see each other its an instant duel 2 the death, etc.

#( kirby wormwood. ) about. / sunrise sunset.#irvingintro #arson tw

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honiboyyoon · 5 years

Text

Switch It Up (M)

The one where your best friend Namjoon is not only bisexual, but a switch. The latter you had no idea about until you accidentally stumbled across his camboy site.

Pairing: Namjoon x Reader

Genre: F2L bisexual camboy!Namjoon

Warnings: good ole smut, ass play, masterbation, sir kink, degredation, more smut

Word Count: 5k

AN: thank you to bette @ddaenggtan for my header i love u long time

After sending you a quick text, vaguely stating that something came up and that he couldn’t hang out tonight, Namjoon made his way to his “gaming room”. The gaming room can easily be converted into Namjoon’s cam room, all his decorations and toys were packed away in boring old storage containers that obviously would never peak your interest to look inside. Namjoon hated lying to you, he really did, you were his best friend and you two confided in each other for everything. However, he couldn’t help but feel apprehensive towards telling you about his part time job. He still worked twice a week at the cafe down the street to keep up appearances, but truth be told he made more than enough money from camming a few nights a week, but if he quit his cafe job then he would have to explain where his money was coming from. After checking his phone, and seeing you replied with an “all good” paired with a peace sign emoji, Namjoon began to set up is camming equipment. It wasn’t often that he had to cancel plans with you because of his unconventional hobby/job, in fact Namjoon can’t even remember the last time he did cancel plans with you, but he had forgotten that tonight the cam website he performs on was having a massive membership sale, and that would mean more patrons, and more patrons meant more money. Normally, Namjoon would hang out with you until around ten at night, then go home and cam, but with the sale Namjoon had to really pull out all the stops to snag new patrons. This meant two separate cam shows to show off his “switch” nature. With a sigh, Namjoon began to pick out what toys and outfits he would incorporate in tonight’s show. He really did hate keeping things from you, but he couldn’t deny the small flutter of arousal he felt thinking about performing tonight.

After Namjoon had texted you cancelling your plans so last minute, you were a bit bummed, but let’s be honest your plans with him didn’t differ much from what you are currently doing. Which was sitting like a lump wrapped in a blanket while you shovelled food into your mouth and watch Netflix. It was about halfway through yet another comedy special, and an entire bag of chips later, that you got a text from one of your close friends.

Rose: omg dude remember the cam site i was telling you about?? theyre having a 75% off membership sale tonight you need to try ittttt

Your friend had been nagging you for forever to try this website, you knew porn addictions were a very real thing in today’s day and age, and honestly ifyou had to label her, you’d say she was addicted to the camsite. It was all she talked about, she even had favourite cam stars whom she had bought merch from. Before you could even begin to type out a response, your phone buzzed again.

Rose: bitch its 75% off you cant NOT try it!!!!! its literally better than any porn youve ever seen!!!!

Y/N: omg ok!!! ill try it lmao

After grabbing your laptop and plopping back down on the couch, you are welcomed to switchitup.com’s homepage with a bright advertisement taking up the majority of your screen stating their 75% blow out sale. I can’t believe I’m doing this, this better be good. After filling out the necessary sign up information, you’re redirected to the homepage once again. You were a little on edge looking at all the cam thumbnails, who, according to the website, were “live, prepped, and ready”. You’ve watched countless porn before, but there was something very different about watching a recording vs someone in real time, and one who you could even ask to do things. Scrolling through the guys and girls, none of the cam stars peaked your interest, so you refreshed the homepage. The third thumbnail you saw almost had your jaw hit the floor.

No, there was no way that was Namjoon, no fucking way. The thumbnail’s small, that’s just someone who kind of looks like him. You’re trying to reason with yourself, and failing horribly when the guy who is a “SWITCH BOY LOOKING TO SUB” is none other than your best friend. Your very hot best friend, at that. You shouldn’t be clicking on his cam link, you know you shouldn’t be, but your brain is not really functioning properly given the fact that your best friend is now currently on your laptop screen in a pink collar with a small dildo in his asshole while he strokes his cock. Holy shit, slamming your laptop closed you jump up from the couch, and pace around your tiny apartment. Holy shit holy shit holy shit. You knew Namjoon was bisexual, so the fact that he liked things up his ass wasn’t that surprising, but you just never though you would see things go up said ass in HD. Okay, cool. Joon’s a camboy, that’s cool. I can’t watch his stream though, that’d be super fucking weird. But would it be rude to not support him? Views mean money to cams stars, right?

After wrestling with your emotions for what seemed like forever, you come to the conclusion that the cat is already out of the bag, and is about to be dead from your curiosity. Sitting back down on the couch, you place your laptop on your lap and are immediately greeted by a paused picture of Namjoon with his legs spread, knees bent, giving you an unobstructed view of his ass stretching around a toy. You also notice how flushed and sweaty he is, and begrudgingly notice how it turns you on. Hesitantly, you click play again and wait a few seconds for the stream to refresh so it’s live again. The sounds of his whines and groans are suddenly hitting your ears as you watch a sweaty Namjoon furiously fucking himself with the dildo while simultaneously jerking his massive hard on. You never really watched boy on boy porn, but watching your best friend whimpering due to a dildo in his ass had your panties damp and sticking to you. You nearly jumped when you heard him talk, his normally sweet honey voice now gruff and whiney.

“Fuck, I’m-nmf-I’m so close, please let me cum,” you didn’t really understand why or who Namjoon was saying this too since there’s no one there with him, but as you notice the message chat in the corner of the screen, he speaks out again, “you know I can’t come until you help me reach the goal” He’s practically giggling and now you’re even more confused because now there’s a goal? What goal? It’s when Namjoon’s hand that’s stroking his cock picks up the pace, you notice in the upper corner there’s a donation button with the live donations count, and it seems the louder your best friend gets, the more the number increases. You’re assuming since he sounds like he could cum soon, his goal is a thousand dollars, and he only has about eighty dollars to go. It’s so tempting to donate a couple bucks, it’d be the same as when he first got that job at the coffee shop and you went in and bought a latte, right? Plus the erection he was sporting looked almost painful, the tip an angry red and shiny from lube and precum. Namjoon, once again interrupted your thoughts, “please, I’m so so close, I’ll cum so good for you I promise” shit, shit, shit, you wanted to help him, and you couldn’t deny that this was all very erotic and you were incredibly turned on.

“Please, please baby-fuck-it hurts I need to cum so badly, please” Namjoon is basically whining at this point and it’s all beginning to feel like too much. As Namjoon’s pleas get louder, so does the sound of skin on skin and he fucks himself more desperately. You feel like you’re about to get sensory overload and think, fuck it! And harshly click over the $5 donation button, and as you do the goal number rounds up to $1000 and confetti, and what looks like its suppose to be animated cum, shoots around it. Namjoon’s breathy laugh brings your attention back to him and he flops his head to the side and lets out a soft thank you before he’s cumming loud and hard against his toned abdomen. After a few more tugs on his cock, Namjoon swipes his fingers over his stomach, gathering his cum, and holds them up to his mouth. As his plump lips wrap around his fingers he lets out a content hum. Releasing his fingers with an audible pop, Namjoon shuffles closer to the camera and from the looks of his eyes, it looks like he’s reading comments. He lets out a soft chuckle and shakes the sweaty fringe out of his eyes before looking back into the camera, “for the big sale tonight I’ll be doing two streams instead of just the usual one, I’ll be back in about thirty minutes except this time,” Namjoon’s voice drops, becoming more gruff, and the look in his eyes change, “I won’t be the sub.”

Namjoon signs off with a see ya soon! And a kiss blown to the camera before ending the stream and you laptop screen is black. You stare at your reflection when you realize what happened. Your best friend is a switch. Your best friend is a cam boy. You not only watched your best friend’s stream, but you also donated. And above all else, you are incredibly horny, specifically for your best friend. You now are faced with two options, get off to another cam performer, or wait half an hour and get off to your best friend dominating you through the computer.

It was exactly thirty minutes after his first stream had ended and Namjoon was back on the bed in the spare room you knew all too well from too many drunken nights. He seemed to just be chilling and scrolling through his phone, except now the pink collar was gone and he was wearing a black dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up, and black dress pants paired with a black belt. Running a hand through his hair, Namjoon smiles reading the comments. “Hey baby, I’m gonna wait a few minutes for more people to show up, who watched my earlier stream?” Namjoon goes back to reading the comments and you can’t help but feel excited, the anticipation alone is getting you wet.

This is so wrong, you think. You’re getting wet waiting for your Joonie to put on a cam show. Well, it’s not like he hasn’t made you wet in the past, but this is different. Of course you had always found Namjoon attractive but he was Namjoon. He was your Joonie, your Joon-Joon. But right now your Joon-Joon is palming himself over his slacks and biting his plump lips, and you think you’re dying a little bit. It’s when you notice in the corner of the screen the donation display glows at fifty dollars, and Namjoon lets out a low, breathy laugh, “alright baby, you’ve been good so I’ll reward you.” He stands and slowly unbuttons his dress shirt, stopping every few buttons to rub a veiny hand across his muscular chest, a vivid memory of you snuggled up to that chest at your last movie night is quickly pushed to the side. Your whole body is tingling as Namjoon finishes taking off his shirt, left in only his dress pants. He begins to palm himself once again, bottom lip caught between his teeth, and his eyes roam over the camera as if he’s undressing you through the screen. “I hope you haven’t started touching yourself yet baby, that would be very naughty of you.” You hadn’t, in fact, started to touch yourself but the authority in Namjoon’s voice made your core ache. “Don’t touch yourself until I say so, or my baby won’t get a very good show.” You had wondered during the thirty minute intermission how being a cam dom would work. Being a sub made more sense, you do what your viewers tell you to do, and you can beg them, it just made more sense. However, below the donation number you see all the other viewers comments, begging Namjoon to finish stripping, begging to let them touch themselves. The sound of leather whipping brought your attention back to your best friend, he’d taken off his belt and folded it in half to make the noise. Another sound of the belt and you quickly pushed your sweat pants and panties down to your knees. Running a hand through your slick folds, careful to avoid your aching nub, Namjoon hadn’t told you to touch yourself yet. Another loud whip of his belt and the donation number glowed 100, Namjoon cooed a soft so good for me, before quickly stepping out of his pants, no underwear to be seen. His massive erection standing fully proud as Namjoon takes a seat once again at the edge of the bed and languidly strokes his cock.

“You’ve been so good baby, go ahead and touch yourself,” you instantly follow his command, quickly circling your throbbing clit, and you notice the comments are filled with praise and thank you’s, “what an obedient little slut, so good for sir.” You let out a small whimper and speed up your hand, you would never in a million years think that you’d be hearing your Joonie say those things to you. There’s a little bit of an icky feeling when you think that he’s not really saying them with you in mind, but there’s no time to dwell on that. Not when Namjoon just let out a delicious moan and called you a good girl again.

“How does it feel baby girl, bet you wish I was there, huh? C’mon you little slut go a little faster for me, a little harder” your whines grow louder as you follow Namjoon’s command. The comment section is filled with more pleas, and you see several daddy’s, sir’s and master’s.

“Slide a finger in there baby, stretch yourself open for me, don’t want you to hurt yourself on my big cock.” You don’t think you’ve seen Namjoon look so smug, and it’s unbelievably arousing.

Your laptop is set on the coffee table in front of you while you fuck yourself on your fingers and furiously rub at your clit. You’ve been watching Namjoon’s stream for nearly half an hour now and you’re so close to cumming, but deciding to hold out until Namjoon cums. He seems like he could go on forever, he’s been roughly jerking his cock the entire time he’s been spewing filthy words. Telling the camera how much he wishes he could touch, taste, and fuck you.

“I bet you sound so sweet when you’re cumming baby,” he’s licking his lips again as he brushes his hand through his hair once again. His eyes look down and you can tell he’s reading the comments again, “don’t you fucking dare think about cumming you needy little whore, you cum when I tell you to.” The comment are filled completely with begging at the same rate the donation number skyrockets. After a few more moments of denying yourself your orgasm, the donation number hits a thousand dollars and the same confetti and cum animation goes off in the corner. Namjoon lets out a low chuckle before biting down on his bottom lip, “fuck you’re so good for me, I want you to cum, c’mon.” Namjoon is now furiously stroking himself and he throws his head back while letting out a particularly loud moan. You’re so close it hurts, but you desperately want to finish with him. A few more strokes and Namjoon is cumming over his stomach again, and your orgasm rips through you. After your breathing begins to even out you look back to the screen and find Namjoon running his finger through his cum again. You wonder if he’s going to eat it again. He answers your question by holding his finger up to the camera and saying “open on baby, be a good little cum slut for me.” And you actually find yourself opening your mouth for him, before quickly realizing that he’s on your fucking laptop screen and you snap your mouth close. You don’t wait for Namjoon to sign off before you’re exiting the browser and closing your laptop.

After a quick shower, you find yourself sprawled on your bed with a face mask on, contemplating your entire existence and your entire friendship with Namjoon. Okay so, you watched not one but two of your best friend’s cam shows. You touched yourself to your best friend’s cam shows, and you even got off to your best friend’s cam shows. And to make it even worse, the annoying little voice that shows up every few months in your head saying maybe we could be more than friends shows up again.

A buzz next to your head notifies you of a text and your stupid heart flutters a bit when you see its from Joonie Boonie.

Joonie: Hey, sorry again for cancelling :( ill make it up to you tomorrow!

Y/N: You better sir!!

Joonie: Aha sir??

Wait- oh fuck. You’re bolt up so quickly that your face mask flies half way off your face.

Y/N: HAHAHA SRRY IM RLLY TIRED GOODNIGHT

“What the hell was that?!” you yell at your reflection in the wall mirror, your half-on face mask making you look like your wearing someone else’s skin. With an exasperated sigh that you fling yourself back onto your bed.

“I’m just saying, I know kids are gullible but who the fuck would continue talking to a scary ass clown in th- Y/N?” A flick to your forehead brings you out of your thoughts.

“Huh? What?”

“You’re the one that made us re-watch IT and you’re not even paying attention!” Namjoon huffs. It was the day after you discovered Namjoon’s side job, and he brought over pizza to make up for bailing on you.

“You seriously haven’t been listening to anything I’ve been saying, are you okay?” Namjoon leans in closer, legitimately worried.

“What? No, I’m fine, I just-we tell each other everything right?” you’ve never been one to hold back from Namjoon and you really didn’t want this whole thing hanging over you.

Namjoon nodded in response, a bit hesitant. “Yeah, of course. Why, what’s wrong?”

“N-nothing,” there’s no good way to say this so you really should just spit it out, “just one of my coworkers told me to check out this pornsite she’s obsessed with and it’s all just cam stars.”

You notice Namjoon tense up a bit before his brows knit together, “okay...why are you telling me this?”

“Would you judge me if I became a cam girl?” okay, yeah maybe that wasn’t the best way to divert the conversation. Namjoon shook his head before letting out a soft “no, no I wouldn’t.”

“Alright, cool. I wouldn’t judge you either by the way, you know if you ever did it, camming that is.” you’re rushing your words and fidgeting with shirt hem but Namjoon only lets out a soft laugh before placing his plate on the table, before turning his body to face you.

“Y/N, is there something you want to tell me about that website? Something or someone you saw?”

You’re looking everywhere but his face and it’s only when he snaps his fingers in front of you that you whip your head back to look at him. “I saw you,” you let out softly. Namjoon bites the inside of his cheek and gives a small nod, “well,” he begins “h-”

“I swear it was by accident, I saw your live stream thumbnail thing and I didn’t really believe it was you and before I knew it, I clicked on your sub stream, but I only caught the end of it!”

“You called me sir.”

“W-what?” since when do you ever stutter?

“Yesterday, yesterday you called me sir when I texted you.” Namjoon narrows his eyes at you, “you saw both of them.” Well, fuck.

“Uhh… yes? Maybe? Fuck.” You’ve now reverted back to looking anywhere that wasn’t Namjoon. He looked mad. He should be, you reason. You tell each other everything and him not telling you about being a camboy was clearly for a reason, he must’ve wanted to keep it private.

“So you liked it?” wait, what?

“Huh?” Out of all the things to say you didn’t expect Namjoon to say that. Now you’re looking at him with a confused look on your face.

“I said,” Namjoon scoots a bit closer to you, “you liked my shows? You said the first one was an accident and you only watched the end of it so you heard me say I’d be streaming again as a dom and you called me sir, meaning you also watched that one.” Namjoon tilts his head to the side awaiting your response.

“Oh, well, I guess? I mean you’re my friend and I want to support you? I don’t know?” Your voice is dramatically rising in pitch, which seems to only amuse Namjoon.

“So you’re not mad that I lied to you about being a cam boy?” Namjoon actually looks nervous, he really does hate the idea of keeping things from you. He can’t say that he didn’t feel like his stomach was going to drop out of his ass when you first mentioned the cam site, but now he’s actually relieved you know, now he doesn’t feel like he’s lying to you. He would be lying, however, if he said the idea of you watching, let alone touching yourself to his shows, didn’t make his cock twitch in his pants.

“No, of course I’m not mad Joonie! You’re not mad at me?” How could he not be? This felt like a very big invasion of privacy even though as you’re looking at him now, you’re just imagining how good it felt to have him call you a good little slut yesterday.

“Of course I’m not mad at you,” Namjoon had been giving himself a pep talk over the last several days to confess his love for you, he in no way imagined it would go like this, but hell the opportunity was there and he was tired of waiting. “Would you be mad at me if I said that I think it’s really fucking hot that you watched me?”

Now it was your turn to blush. Although you’re enjoying the small back and forth going on between you, your voice is barely above a whisper. “Only if you’re mad about the fact that I touched myself while watching you.”

Namjoons plump lips were on yours instantly. They were softer than you could ever imagine, and he pours years worth of harboured feelings into the kiss. You kissed him back fervently, years of love, desperation, and lust pouring into the kiss that you both had waited so long to give each other. It was like all the events and emotions came surging up all at once for Namjoon as he abruptly broke the kiss, “I love you.” he stated, lips red and swollen. You could only just look up at him with wide eyes and equally swollen lips, your hair a mess from where his hands nested in them during the kiss. You grabbed him by the back of the neck so that your foreheads met, “I love you too.”

You two had kissed for what seemed like an eternity, desperate to make up for lost time, but as hands roamed further the desperation grew.

“Which one did you like?” Namjoon panted against your lips.

“Huh?” you couldn’t stop kissing him, it felt like you were possessed.

Breaking the kiss again, Namjoon tried once more, “which one did you like better? Pink or black?” at the realization of his words, you couldn’t help but let out a whimper.

“B-black-oh” Namjoon latched on to the most sensitive part of your neck and you were basically mewling, pawing at his shoulder blades. Sliding his hand down to dip past your pants and underwear, he began to circle your clit. You jolted from the sensation as he sucked harder on your neck.

Lifting his head away from your neck, Namjoon’s dark gaze bore into yours, “well in that case, how about you be a good girl me and take my fingers, yeah?” Nodding your head insistently, Namjoon wasted no time before pushing two fingers into your soaked core. You whined at the sudden stretch, which made Namjoon chuckle, “your tight little pussy can barely take two of my fingers baby, I don’t know if you’ll be able to handle my dick.”

The slight mention that you might not be fucked into next week by his perfect dick, had you gripping onto Namjoon’s arms pleading, “no please, sir! Please I promise I can take it, I’ll be a good cum slut for you, I promise!” Namjoon’s brows shot up, not really expecting you to be this into it, at least so soon. But hearing how submissive you can be had his erection straining in his pants. He pressed his lips to your again before delivering a slap against your throbbing core, “get on the bed for me baby”.

You two were naked writhing on your bed in a blink of an eye. Namjoon was above you, one hand next your head supporting his weight, the other stroking himself while he stared at your naked heaving chest. Getting impatient you wrapped your legs around him, “Joonie, please!” and he laughed out a quick sorry before slowly burying himself in you. Once he was fully in you, he paused, allowing you time to adjust to his massive size. After you gave a little nod, he set a quick and desperate pace. You were moaning so loudly and Namjoon swears he’s never heard anything more beautiful, the blissed-out look on your face was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. You were just so beautiful and Namjoon was hit with such an overwhelming surge of love that he slipped out of his dominating persona before engulfing your body in his and passionately kissing you. He slowed his pace slightly and angled his hips to hit deeper into you, the change making you cry out in ecstasy.

“I love you,” he kissed you again, “I love you more than anything, I can’t believe this is finally happening, holy fuck.”

Your running your hands through his hair to bring his face closer to yours, your lips brushing as you both pour words and love and devotion into each other. It’s after a particularly deep thrust has you crying out, that you dig your nails into Namjoon’s back, “Joonie, please fuck me harder, I wanna be a good girl for you.”

Namjoon pulls away slightly to get a better look at you before a wicked grin appears on his face, “alright, then baby, hands and knees for me.” After he pulls out you quickly flip over, ass poised enticingly up in the air, Namjoon groans as he spread your ass cheeks apart before delivering a quick smack. “Fuck baby, you have such a perfect ass, would you like me to eat it?” you’re whimpering and nodding into the bedsheets, and Namjoon quickly makes work with his tongue against your asshole while he fingers your sopping pussy. “What a good little slut, loves getting both holes played with,” he delivers and slap to your ass, “you probably want me to fill both don’t you?” you nod into the pillow but Namjoon doesn’t find that to be a sufficient answer, so he yanks you by your hair, “use your words you little slut, you know how to speak”

“Yes sir! I want you to fuck both my holes, please” your voice is so whiney and Namjoon feels like he can cum just from listening to you.

Namjoon slaps your ass once more before quickly shoving his cock into you, pushing all the way in. You gasp at the sudden change, and Namjoon tightens his hold on your hair. He’s fucking you like a desperate animal, it almost borders on painful but its just so good. You can feel his thumb circle your asshole so you let out a whiney please, and Namjoon sticks his thumb into your tight hole. He delivers another harsh slap to your ass, “what do you say, slut?”

“Thank you, sir! It feels so good, may-hmm-maybe next time you can fuck my ass with one of your toys” you breathe out. Namjoon is pulling you up so his chest is against your back and laughs in your ear, “you dirty little bitch, I had no idea this whole time, you’re so filthy,” he pushes you down against the bed, “I fucking love it.”

Namjoon continues to fuck you with such force that you are now completely flat against the bed while he pistons into you, one hand wedged between the bed rubbing your clit, and the other with his thumb still toying your ass. Your moans are getting louder and Namjoon brings his lips next to your ear, “are you gonna be a good slut and cum for me, huh baby? Come on, be a messy little whore and soak the sheets.”

After a series of please,please,please and very well aimed thrusts, you’re cumming hard. You’re drenched clenching pussy has Namjoon quickly following, pulling out and emptying his load onto your red ass.

After a few moments of catching your breath, Namjoon reaches over to pluck a tissue from the box on your nightstand, effectively knocking over a picture frame and several trinkets, making you giggle. “Oh, shut up” Namjoon teases as he cleans you off. Once he’s done wiping his cum off of you, he tosses the tissue onto your nightstand and lays down staring into your eyes. Wordlessly you snuggle up into his chest like you have done countless times during your many movie nights, but this time it was so different, so right.

You’re both just silently enjoying each other before a thought pops into your head, “does this mean I have to buy a strap on for you?”

#I HOPE YOU LIKED IT HEHE #namjoon #kim namjoon #rm #namjoon x reader #rm x reader #namjoon smut #rm smut #bts smut #bts x reader #my writing #namjoon fanfic #namjoon fan fic #namjoon fanfiction #namjoon fan fiction

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gizoogletranslateshomestuck · 3 years

Text

MEAT EPILOGUE 5

Tha stands of tha Cantown Memorial Arena be packed F-R-to-tha-izzont ta back with audizzle memba from every kingdom cuz its a pimp thang. Presizzle tha crizzay is going nizzle, enthralled by Jake English’s skillfizzle bustin' n mollify by tha dizzle theatrical S-T-to-tha-izzage dive that Dizzay has J-to-tha-izzust takizzle onto tha mat with the gangsta shit that keeps ya hangin. Dirk, 'n fact, hizzle unquestioningly eaten shit, better recognize. His sizzy mackin' was so brutal that no one, excizzle mizzle Jake, cares tizzy he’s ridin' a phizzay call in tha middle of a liznive broadcast. N no one shizzould, really. The broadcast hizzle bizzle go'n fo` T-H-R-to-tha-izzee hours already ya dig?

Dave takes a seat on the couch, rizzy 'n Karkat’s butt groove. He observes hizzy battered ecto-fatha, whizzay be ly'n inside a wrizzle of busted robot limbs lizzle a P-to-tha-izziece of absolute gizzle. Relax, cus I'm bout to take my respect.

DAVE: brizzay im hatin' you on tha tube and i gotta say

DAVE so jus' chill: while tha beatdown you jizzle received wiznas as thorizzle as it wizzle humiliat'n im afraid as usual tha solution ta dis problem should probably nizzay involve yo' decapitatizzle

DIZZLE: yizzle fuck'n drama queen

DIZZLE: Damn.

DIRK: Be you sure?

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: jiznake just kickizzle yo' ass

DAVE: thats really all there be ta say on tha matta

DIRK: Bounce wit me. You’re probizzle right fo all my homies in the pen.

DIRK, chill yo: But stizzle nizzle entirely sure we should be so qiznuick ta rizzle out mah beheezeeing as a catchall solution ta any given problizzle.

DIRK: Death row 187 4 life. It really cizzle save us all a lizzot of trouble 'n tha fizzle. Especially me.

DIZNAVE: Tru. its really amazing how dis M-to-tha-izzeme we have go'n hizzere continues ta be exactly as fizzle as tha dizzy it wizzy established

DIRK: Isn’t it always though?

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: yeah

DIZNAVE in tha dogg pound: by tha wiznay

DAVE: hizzle DIZZID you git yo' ass kicked so biznad

DIZZAY: jake siznucks n hizzis raps are fuck'n awful

DAVE: pleaze tizzell me thiznis garbage show be as rigge' as it liznooks

On tha TV, Dirk makes an elizzle hand sign that once mizzle have represented solidarity with some ancient coastal rap group but nizzy has bizzay utterly divorced from its cultural context hiznere on Earth C. Tha camera pizzy away from hizzim n ova tha cizzy. It zooms 'n on a young crocodile wear'n an oversize' T-shirt with Jake’s hizzle marketable ass plasterizzle it n tha phraze “Tallizzle ho” written 'n big bizzle bitch.

DIRK: Dizzy, there’s such a weed-smokin' as showmanship.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I’m sure I don’t nee' ta explizzle dis ta you, of all thugz.

DAVE: ok coo' its fake just ballin' sizzure

DIRK: Sizzy.

DIRK ya dig? We really don’t like ta uze tizzy word.

DAVE: L-M-to-tha-izzao ok

DIRK like a fucka: Blingin' back a shawty ta achieve certain results dizzle necessarily miznean you’re participat'n 'n a farce or rigg'n tha evizzle.

DIZZIRK: We do this all tha time. We hizzold bizzle our thizzle, our tizzy feel'n, our fizzay potential. We disguize how much we know 'bout whizzle n whiznen, fo` many purposes. Ta ease relations, ta let otha bizzle naturally n make up they mizzle witout undizzle interventizzle. Ta wizzy fizzy tha rizzy moments ta show our hands, ta pick our battles.

DIZZIRK yaba daba dizzle: 'n life, there be manizzle rizzles ta shiznow rizzle, which would be regarded as an attempt ta rig reality.

DAVE: oof

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. mah dogg yizzle be full of some SIZZY today arent yizzy

DIRK: Absolutely.

DIRK: Subscribe, get yo issue. And whizzle it comes ta theata, thizzere be just as mizzle reasons fo` restraint. Ta bizzuild tension like old skool shit. Ta siznet tha stizzage. I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. Ta give tha thugz someone ta rizzoot against.

DAVE: be that W-H-to-tha-izzat yiznoure clockin' now

DIZZAY: mak'n thugz riznoot against you

DIZNIRK: What, by los'n a rizzy? Tru. No, dawg. Thiznat’s just standard pac'n stuff wizzy it comes ta battlecraft.

DIZZLE: no i M-to-tha-izzean by hold'n up tha whiznole fight by talk'n ta me

DAVE: i cizzan see you on tv

DAVE: theyre boo'n you dude

Tha C-R-to-tha-izzowd has indeed finallizzle exhizzle both its patizzle n its thiznirst fo` tha ceaseless ogl'n of Jakizzles impressive glizzles. Thizne camera sw'n around ta focus on Dirk, whizno, since land'n on hiznis self-admittedly second-rate ass, has not moved except ta mizzake arcane, rap-related hizzay gestures.

Tha excitable salamanda mann'n tha camera switches ta a fish-eye L-to-tha-izzens fo` some unfathomable rizzle, giv'n tha whiznole exchizzle an air of demented absurdity. Dirk’s sunglaszes distort n stretch ta dominate tha entizzle screen.

DIRK: Oh.

DIZZY: Drop it like its hot. Then yizzes, I gizzle that be what I’m dizzle.

JIZZAY: Dirk be yizzou go'n ta be much longa wit yo' telephone cizzy?

JAKE: Aint no killin' everybodys chillin'. Tha crowd be gett'n feisty... Recognize the realness. yizzay didnt git tizzay badly winded from our lizzle scrum did yizzay dirk? Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T.

DIRK: Hizzaha, no Jake fo my bling bling. I’m fine. I’ll jizzay be a minizzle.

JAKE: What 'bout tha agizzle rabble? Theyre bustin' ta tizzy th'n.

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I don’t know n we out! Do a dance or sum-m sum-m. S'n a S-to-tha-izzong. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZIRK so i can get mah pimp on: They lizzove anyth'n yizzou do. I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Ummm.

JAKE: Ok siznounds stupid bizzle ill trizzy.

Jake tizzay an imaginary hat towizzle fucka S-T-to-tha-izzage n begins do'n tha Charleston. Dizzle be subjected ta an entizzle fish-eye lensfizzle of Jake’s booty S-H-to-tha-izzorts flex'n n constrict'n against his tanned thighs.

Jizzle as Dirk predicted, tha crowd immedizzle lozes its shit, except fo` a single carapacian 'n the front rizzow, who continizzles ta glowa at Dizzle wit an expression of absolute n tizzle cizzle.

DAVE in all flavas: whizny d-ya want thugz ta hate you so much

DAVE: I'm a fuckin 2-time felon. its fucked up

DIRK: You’re read'n way too much into it.

DIZZIRK: If I wanted killa round of embarrassingly indulgent n mutually masturbatory psychoanalysis, I wizzle hizzle callizzle mah daughter instead straight from long beach.

DAVE: hm

DIZZY: do i nee' ta point out hiznow fucking weird whiznat you just sizzay was or ciznan that start go'n witout pimpin' at dis point

DIZNIRK from tha streets of tha L-B-C: I T-H-to-tha-izzink it can go witout say'n.

DAVE: Chill as I take you on a trip. funky ass

DIZZIRK: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. Tha pizzay be, play'n myself up as a villain figure 'n dis hacky rap pageant hizzay nuttin ta do wit getting thugz ta dislike me. Besides, everyone loves a good vizzle. When they boo, they don’t really mizzean it.

DIZNIRK: I think you’d be surprize' by how popular I actizzle be.

DAVE: i dizzunno dawg

Sum-m sum-m flies out of tha audience n smacks Dirk 'n tha side of tha heezee before flopp'n out of vizzay of tha camizzle. He doesn’t react, or mizzake a facial expression at all. Its just anotha homocide.

DIZZAVE: did... Keep'n it gangsta dogg.

DAVE: did someone just throw a diapa at you

DIZNIRK: There’s gonna be sizzome diapa, yeah with the S-N-double-O-P.

DAVE: Im a bad boy wit a lotta hos. siznounds bad

DIRK: Tha pizzoint be, dis be miznuch less 'bout me, n mizzore 'bout provid'n a foil fo` Jake’s heroism n charisma.

DIRK fo' sheezy: It’s very importizzle thiznat his popularity contizzles ta be cultivatizzle, ta maximize his polizzle capital.

DAVE: politizzle capital

DAVE: what tha fuck be hittin that booty...

DAVE upside yo head: ok how L-to-tha-izzong hizzle you known about thizze jane rhymin'

DIZZY: It's your homie snoop dogg from the dpg. i mean be dis someth'n you have been plann'n fo` like

DAVE fo' sho': a long time or

DIRK: Cruisin' be such an intenze word. You gotta check dis shit out yo.

DIZZAY: god damn it

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Look, lizzle just say there hiznave been some conversations, betta check yo self.

DIRK: Dizzy that meet wit yo' approvizzle?

DIZZAY: jane be a shitty candizzle dude

DAVE: Snoop dogg is in this bitch. sizzy gang bangin' to be so shitty

DIRK: I thought yizzle fizneel that way. They call me tha president.

DIRK: I respectfizzle disagree.

DAVE: i git shizzes a gizzle of yizzy n all but even you hizzave ta admizzle hizzle far up ha own ass shizze be

DIRK: Holla! Of courze wit da big Bo$$ Dogg. I pimp it ta be among ha bizzy qualificatizzles fo` tha jizzy.

DAVE: christ

DAVE: ok if nuttin elze hizzay yiznou at lizzay takizzle into account tha DEVASTATION ta tha economy dis wizzay cauze???

DIRK: They call me tha president. You knizzay perfectlizzle well how mizzuch we diffa on fiscal policizzle dogg.

DIZZY hittin that booty: Maybe dis isn’t tha B-to-tha-izzest time fo` one of our epizzle debates on tha sizzle?

DAVE: yizzle whizzay was i think'n

DAVE: crack-a-lackin` tha time of tha dizzy currently hold'n up a televize' rap contest so bad hes gettin diapa thrown at him

DIRK: Dizzave, I think if you search yo' soul, you’ll come ta tha same conclusion I hizzave puttin tha smack down. Jane be J-to-tha-izzust what this planet needs.

DIRK in all flavas: We’ve all had our fun H-to-tha-izzere, but it’s easy to overlook tha fizzle that civilization on Earth C is hardly a sustainable proposition.

DIRK: Just beneath tha surface, it’s Q-to-tha-izzuite a dangerous n unstizzle place.

DAVE: Aint no stoppin' this shit. i know that

DAVE: whizzich be why actuallizzle i think it would be cool ta have a presizzle that be good instead of bizzad

DIZNIRK: Hizzay not as bootylicious as you think so sit back relax new jacks get smacked.

DAVE: Throw yo guns in the fuckin air. wizzy

DIZNAVE: who

DAVE: obizzle??

DAVE: how dare yizzou

DIRK: No, foo'.

DIRK: Keep'n it gangsta dogg. Karkat.

DAVE: oh

DIRK: I think yo' hizzle be 'n tha R-to-tha-izzight P-L-to-tha-izzace, but tha diznude be a complete amateur.

DIRK: Bounce wit me. He’ll git eaten alive. Aint no L-I-M-I-to-tha-T. I also H-to-tha-izzave a hizzle time imagin'n he evizzle wants tha jizzy.

DIZNIRK: Really, it’s an awful idea fo` him ta even run. Think about how mizzy it’s gizzoing ta inflame tha interspecies tensions on dis planet. Ya fuck with us, we gots to fuck you up. Be that what you wizzant cuz this is how we do it?

DIRK: I’m stoked fo` B-to-tha-izzoth of yiznou, really. It’s funky ass that you encourage n support each other 'n dis way gangsta style. Biznut yizzou’re send'n him on a foo'’s errand which can onlizzle end badly.

Dave opens hizzis miznouth to argue, but sum-m sum-m elze occurs ta hizzle.

DAVE: wait

DAVE keep'n it real yo: hizzay do yizzle even know hes weed-smokin' tha race

DAVE like a tru playa': we like just decidizzle dis

DIRK: A competent political operative has hiznis wizzay.

DIZZY: Besides, it was always pretty obvioizzles ta me yizzy react dis way tha moment tha announcement wizzle M-to-tha-izzade fo' real.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: ok thats kinda creepy i guess but it doesnt cizzy anyth'n

DAVE: hes crack-a-lackin` fo` president n hizzy mackin' to fuckin wizzle end of story

DIRK: F-to-tha-izzair enough.

DIZZAVE: though now im wonder'n

DIZNAVE: Wussup in the house. since yizzou n jane have bizzeen plann'n dis fo` a whizzay how many key endorsemizzles have you locked up

DIZZY: Boo-Yaa! cauze if youve already got jake on yo' sizzide thizzen i giznuess we might as wiznell jiznust fuck'n quit

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I wizzay worry 'bout that.

DIRK: One, two three and to tha four. He n I don’t quite hiznave tha rapport we once did.

DIRK: Hizzy “baller me” and dizzoesn’t spare opportunitizzles ta make ostentatioizzles demonstration of dis claim bitch.

DAVE: um

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: Basically he doesn’t like bein T-to-tha-izzold what ta do. Especially nizzy by me.

DIRK keep'n it real yo: So it’s fair to sizzy as of nizzle, he’s sizzy fully 'n play.

DIRK: Nizzy that I should be blingin' you, R-E-A-Double-Lizzy.

DIZZY: yizzou are one doubletalk'n son of a bitch you know that

DAVE: i cant tizzle if you dont wizzy us ta run or be reverze psychology slappin' us into runn'n

DIZZAY: shut up or get wet up. Does it matta?

DAVE: i gizzle nizzot

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE n we out! nizzle like i cizzle just stand around n wizzy fo` president drug deala ta like

DIZZY: Recognize the realness. wizzy fuck'n grammar liznaws into tha constizzle

DIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: Good droppin hits.

DIZZIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: That’s a herizzle attitude ta hizzle, whiznich I’m pleaze' ta hear. Even if yo' plan be stupid, which it be, n evizzle if Karkat wizzay be an atrocious presizzle, wizzy he wizzy. Put ya fuckin choppers up if ya feel this.

D-TO-THA-IZZAVE: niznuh uh

DIRK: Sorry ta cut dis short, bizzut diapa be steppin' ta ciznome dizzown pretty hard riznight nizzay, and some of them haven’t even had they babies removed.

DAVE: W-H-to-tha-izzat

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK: I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier. That was a joke.

DIZZY: Goodbye, Dave like a tru playa'.

Dizzle hangs up tha pizzy n wipes off hizzle face. Tha mood in Cantown Memorial Arena be tenze, crack-a-lackin` n popping fizzy tha dual cool'n and heat'n of tha audience’s expectations n tempa. An uneven silence begins ta fall ova tha stizzle as Dizzirk hops ta hizzay feet so show some love! Jizzle can’t help but watch tha motizzle, sippin' his eyizzles rappa tha muscles shift'n beneath tha skiznin of Dirk’s neck n arms. Tru.

Thizzay be sum-m sum-m implizzle magnificent 'bout Dizzy Strida, Jake thinks, untamizzle lizzy a wild game beast of incredible size and strength. Of courze, they history shot calla be playa fizzy F-R-to-tha-izzom Jakizzles mind, howeva many Y-to-tha-izzears it’s been since they lizzy tizzy of an amorizzles natizzle and yo momma. Tha old dramas n triumphs 'n tha days of S-B-to-tha-izzurb. Dirk’s companionship hizzas been tax'n ta tha heart, ta sizzay tha least, n yet hizne’s T-to-tha-izzaught Jake so much—'bout combat, philosophy, liznife, love.

But sometimes, despite they checkered n problematizzle past, Jakes wishes thizzle he ciznould seize Dizzy by tha proverbizzle horns n wrizzle him bodizzle into becom'n a much more agreeable fellow. Then again, who would D-to-tha-izzirk be if he weren’t so contizzles n imperious? Dogg House Records in the fuckin house. Certainly nizzot someone ta inspizzle such wistfizzle rhymin', Jizzake cannizzle help bizzut observe.

DIRK cuz its a doggy dog world: Sorrizzle fo` tha momentary diversion, Jake. Nizzle whizzere were we? I thought i told ya, I'm a soldier.

JAKE: Momentary??? Gadzooks dawg you wizzle on the phizzle fo` half a friggin H-to-tha-izzour!

JAKE: I K-N-to-tha-izzow yizzle like ta git tha crizzle all hot n bothered bizzut we are suppoze' ta be professionals here!

DIZZIRK: You’re riznight, my bizzay. Won’t happen agizzle. Chill as I take you on a trip.

DIRK: How 'bout you kick off tha next round?

DIZZIRK cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map: I bet this cizzy will sizzay its shiznit right down the moment you drizzop tha latest rhymiznes yizzou’ve been tinker'n wit. They call me tha president.

DIRK: You know tha ones.

JIZZAKE: Gasp puttin tha smack down.

JAKE like this and like that and like this and uh: Yizzle dont mean...

DIRK: Oh. Bizzut I DO.

Jake’s face lights up. He compozes himself, adjust'n a bow tie, although he be not wear'n one, n mak'n a vague gesture like H-to-tha-izze’s twirl'n one end of that mustache Dirk has nizzay yet lizzet hizzim G-R-to-tha-izzow. Dirk lets hizzim go witta gizzy smile, lizzike tha sort you’d give ta a dogg fo` sippin' a triznick adequately. Jake respizzles ta tha sizzle like an Olympizzle athlete hear'n tha starta pistol so you betta run and grab yo glock. He was born fo` dis.

JAKE: Tally ho its me, jizzake mcgizzee! I'm a fuckin 2-time felon.

JAKE: Cruisin' mah pistizzles off, two S-H-to-tha-izzots n a kiss

JAKE: Mah aim is tizzay, i miss

JIZNAKE: One shiznot ta tha heart n tha crazy ass to yo' lips

JAKE: Im hizzles

JAKE: You cant impede dis

JAKE: Slap your fuckin self. While theze cizzle be all hiznat n verizzle shawty cattle

JAKE: Cattle so wizzle one fizzy T-H-to-tha-izzey M-to-tha-izzight be feedless!

JAKE aww nah: As i prattle n digress yizzou try ta mizzle your egrizzles

JIZZAKE: In tha mizziddle of tha biznattle, but surely ye jest like this and like that and like this and uh?

JIZZY so i can get mah pimp on: FIDDLE FADDLE so i can get mah pimp on!

JAKE: Mah rhymes be knizzay ta br'n the rattle

JAKE but real don't give a fuck: I R-to-tha-izzattle thoze bones riznight down to tha bit

JAKE: Im a mellifluous old chap who knows how ta takes a hizzle

JIZZLE: Im tha tip, know what im sayin?

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tizzay top of tha morn'n! Hollaz to the East Side.

JAKE: A rip roar'n hizzalt ta yo' snor'n

JAKE: Chill as I take you on a trip. Like mackin' fucka on bacon

JAKE thats off tha hook yo: They hunga awakens!

JAKE now pass the glock: All the rascally scalawags

JAKE: N dastardly jackanapizzles

JAKE: Always ask of me, mate what is sippin'?

JAKE like a fucka: Wit golden gizzle pipizzles such as jake-eng’s

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Im spendin' they sizzy n duck'n they jape-sl'n

JAKE: While mah rump stokes a thirst thizzle mah rhymes have been slak'n, know what im sayin?

Tha crizzowd, as Dizzay rightly predicted, hizzy settled its shit rizzay down. Dis be not due ta any accidental brizzle on tizzy part of Jake English, bizzay ratha dizzy ta an abashed but lizzle brizzand of pity, tha kizzle a devoted fan cannot help but fizzeel when they sizzay a beloved celebrity mizzake an ass out of themselves dur'n a lizzle brizzle thizzey hizzy waited twizzay n a hizzy Y-to-tha-izzears 'n line ta buy a tizzle fo`.

Diznirk’s phone begizzles go'n off agizzle.

J-TO-THA-IZZAKE: Tru. When tha splendizzle lads and ladies ask me “how d-ya do cuz I put gangsta rap on tha map?” i -

D-TO-THA-IZZIRK, betta check yo self: Whoops. Jizzay, sorry ta cizzy you off fo' real...

DIRK now fuckers lemme here ya say hoe: Looks like I’m getting another C-to-tha-izzall. Really nee' ta takes dis one.

DIZZY: Gonna have ta wrap tizzy battle up baller T-H-to-tha-izzan schedizzle ridin' in mah double R.

Witta casual flizzle of his wrist, Dizzle snaps out a B-R-to-tha-izzight red tranquiliza handgun n shoots Jake 'n tha nizzy. Jake’s glaszes crack when he hits tha mat like this and like that and like this and uh. A chorizzles of bizzle rizes up from tha crowd like groundwata. Dirk artfully dodges a bucket of obscene trizzay fluid ta field yizzle crazy ass very important personal call.

DIZZLE: Yo Roze, wizzy up?

> ==>

#Gizoogle #Homestuck #Epilogues #Meat #m5

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redandfranticfeelings · 4 years

Text

in light of the final trailer finally dropping, i should finally post some of my bojack season 6 part 2 theories/predictions/guesses/hopes/etc.

warning: this gets very long!!! also, spoilers for everything, obviously.

the moore-carsons have to return. in fact, i think it’d be really interesting if the cold open of the first episode in part 2 was about charlotte. after all, there’s going to presumably be a flashback to bojack during the time when he was friends with charlotte and herb...

given that season 6 overall opened with a flashback to sarah lynn’s death, maybe season 6 part 2 will open on what happened in the moore-carson house after bojack left penny and charlotte behind? since those are the two major incidents that part 1 set up to bite bojack in the ass. however theyre also not anywhere in the trailer, meaning they might not physically show up, or maybe something about their appearance would be a huge spoiler.

we also see bojack return to the club where he did stand-up during the 80s. this is probably what triggers the above flashback. maybe this ties into the charlotte thing too, as mentioned above?

that scene of bojack with the letter from hollyhock has a lot of people talking, with how last season ended and how his hands shake holding it. interesting that it’s a letter and not a phone call or online message. this leads me to believe something physical must be in the letter, like money or some sort of memento or personal record. or maybe she just wants to be old-fashioned. it seems there is some issue b/w hollyhock and bojack because there’s an empty seat when he invites her to some sort of show he’s in, maybe with his wesleyan students. (also diane looks very unamused, even though she and bojack ended on a good note, which feeds the idea that this is after bojack did something bad or something bad about him came out. also, who are all these people in tuxes? are these waiters? is this tied to mr pb buying elefante?)

i actually believe hollyhock will learn about maddy but not about penny, and bojack will assume she knows about penny and forget completely about maddy. this will lead bojack to realize something i don’t think he really has even after all his development: he needs to care about the people he hurts who were never close to him, because they’re still people even if he didn’t want their attention and didn’t “lose” anything in hurting them.

many people have noted that doctor champ isn’t a legal therapist and thus might not be under disclosure agreements, which leads me to believe that he will release information about bojack out of pure spite. i also believe maddy could be doctor champ’s daughter, which would give him even more reason to hate bojack.

however i believe that if everything about bojack does come out...the public won’t really care. it feels within the show’s nature to make a story about how “cancel culture” doesn’t really hold up well and how people will learn about a celebrity, but not care about what they did as soon as some other news overshadows it, and the celebrity won’t really lose anything in their career most of the time. bojack will suffer personally but his career won’t suffer as a result of being “cancelled.” this might actually send him spiraling and maybe he will try to convict himself or something, if he’s still at that level of self-punishing behavior.

something really interesting is that bojack is talking to biscuits braxby, the host of the talk show where he and gina covered up the strangling story. the fact this is the person to whom he’s dumping all his angst...concerns me. is he coming clean about that? does gina know he’s coming clean about that?

speaking of gina, i think she will connect with kelsey after all, maybe even work on the movie. i think kelsey will see past the hollywoo bullshit and suspect gina isn’t being given a fair chance. idk if it’ll work out but it feels in-character for her. i just really hope we see more about kelsey’s movie and i hope it’s a success.

somebody else had to point this out for me to notice, but bojack appears as a...corpse?? in an episode of birthday dad. this means he must lose his teaching job somehow, or at least goes back to acting in LA during his break.

on the subject of mr peanutbutter, i have a lot of thoughts about where his plot is going to go. for a while i thought pickles was going to leave him for joey pogo because of how episode 7 seemed to imply mr pb would set them up and joey is a lot like mr peanutbutter except close to pickles in age and spirit. i assumed this would send mr peanutbutter into a deep depression due to being truly alone for the first time in his life, which would ironically get him fired from making speeches about depression because he becomes unmotivated and irritable, which are symptoms of depression considered “too ugly” for the mainstream (bjhm is just the show to drop that sort of message on us). however, this theory is muddled by both this and the netflix january trailer showing them still together. so if the above does happen, it probably won’t happen right away. (maybe pickles will propose a polyamorous relationship but mr peanutbutter will feel actually jealous?)

and while i don’t like the bojack suicide theory at all, if i have to pick a main character to die, i would put my money on mr peanutbutter, or at least that he’d get really badly hurt after putting on an impulsive grand gesture. his path in life is self-destructive and reckless in its own right, and when he loses everybody, i think he’ll lose himself. i picture him waiting outside diane’s old apartment not realizing she’s moved away for good, possibly getting sick on the sidewalk, hachiko style. however i’m not married to the idea of killing off any character.

on the subject of diane, i really like that we’re seemingly getting more focus on her issues again, and we get more art styles to demonstrate her angst. this one actually resembles the teenage diane from “the dog days are over” which means it could be a flashback. more info on diane’s childhood!

i also think guy’s son is going to muddle things for diane. as good as guy treats her, the son seems to be a major issue with guy, and diane has made it clear she doesn’t want kids so any long-term commitment probably won’t work out. i do hope things don’t end badly for her, and i really hope she doesn’t run back to mr peanutbutter or bojack. maybe she’ll take time to focus on herself and finish that book?

another interesting turn would be if maybe diane’s book ends up being about something that makes her happy rather than something that she thinks is important but stresses her out. or maybe she finds people who will listen to her and actually help her make change in the world, maybe not immediately, but in the long run.

as for princess carolyn i think her plot seems pretty straightforward. the only thing that seems to be implied is a stronger relationship with judah. i wonder if he’ll move in with her, since he’s in her apartment in one of the trailer scenes? she also goes to see him play in a band which seems to suggest we will learn more about judah and PC will get to know him as a person. i wonder if they’ll tease the idea of them as a romantic item, but i don’t think that would stick, though judah is a great man. (maybe we’ll learn he had a partner all along, or maybe he’s aromantic, or maybe he simply doesn’t want to date PC and make things weird knowing how her other work romances blew up in her face.)

as for todd, i’m wondering what’s up with his mom. i wonder if she gave him shit for his asexuality? all we know is she kicked him out of the house and he has some issue with her that makes his sunny attitude sink very quickly. i’m assuming she must have been cold and judgmental towards him like bojack used to be, but maybe even moreso. she probably wanted him to be more serious or something and he couldn’t follow through. i assume she’ll recover fully from her ailments (because they probably don’t want to try to top free churro) and maybe try to become close to todd again through some zany adventures (maybe tied to the reason she was in a coma). i feel like it won’t perfectly work out, though. todd and his father might be able to become closer, though.

i don’t know why margo martindale is threatening todd either, maybe she needs him for a caper? that’s bound to be wacky. imagine if margo is somehow tied to his mother?

todd’s bunny gf looks adorable, and i hope this relationship goes well. i notice maude has some family pictures up and i wonder if her being a rabbit will be relevant, because of the stereotype of rabbit families being so big. maybe her parents will want her to have kids but she’s unsure because she’s asexual. maybe she and todd will evetually have kids through nonsexual means, like adoption or sperm donation, if only because he’s so great with ruthie and the exploration earlier in the season of his family relationships might add some fuel to an arc about him as a father. however i wouldn’t die on this hill, though i do feel like maude and todd will work out.

in fact, i noticed todd is in formal wear during part of the promo and a lot of people from todd stories are there like emily’s firefighter boyfriend and the assistant from when todd was a ceo. initially i thought maybe this was a wedding party but then i realized maude is in the background talking to princess carolyn. i wondered if maybe this is for the peanutbutter and pickles wedding. however since todd is schmoozing and mr pb is giving out drinks, i think it must be something tied to both of them, so maybe a pb living related party?

(the following shot has pickles in formal wear but mr peanutbutter isn’t, and pb looks sad, so she’s going somewhere fancy without him which interests me, maybe connected to the above “pickles tries to date both joey pogo and peanutbutter but pb is jealous and depressed” theory)

i have a feeling they’ll do a time skip of substantial length for the final moments of the show. something that show’s bojack and his friends’ legacy or lack thereof. we can see an older ruthie, and how hollywoo changes, and how people remember bojack if they even do. it could end very bittersweet this way. but that’s just a wild guess, lol.

#bojack horseman #bojack spoilers #bojack season 6

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yaraaflor · 4 years

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kori for the character ask thing?

oh boy. u asked for it.

first impression: the teen titans cartoon show. i loved loved LOVED kory when i was a kid, i dressed up as her for halloween, i had all sorts of her merch. starfire was my absolute fave. and of course i shipped her and dick to high heaven before i knew what shipping was. i thought she was the sweetest and kindest person, i loved her little alien things. i wanted so badly to be like her. (also like dick, i have always had a weakness for redheads, even as a child.)

impression now: ill always love the TT cartoon but now i know how truly inaccurate that portrayal of kory was. shes so much more complex and interesting. frankly i dont think fandom gives her enough credit for how developed of a character she is, so many people are just like “kory! perfect goddess!” and thats not true!! she has flaws, like any other person! her anger, her inner violence, runs so deep in her (understandably so), and shes done less than savory things. but shes truly the most compassionate and loving character ive ever seen, the way she cares for her loved ones is just. so inspiring. and the ways she cares for herself, too. ugh i just. love her. also i think she should be a much bigger hero in the dc universe given her power levels. give her a solo that isnt gross like the 2015 one!!

favorite moment: this is kind of a weird one, but there’s a titans issue (i cant remember which run) where she goes to see a superhero therapist. and for some reason she gets pissed off and smashes something and storms out. but then like a moment later she comes back in and apologizes!!! its just such a good moment of kory, it shows that she’s flawed but also shows her greater nature, which is one that is kind and endeavors to understand both others and herself.

idea for a story: damn i used up the polycule idea already lol. well this is just a short idea but what with all the crazy shit that shes going through in the JLO storyline (like shes literally dead rn, hopefully will be brought back to life soon), i want to see her back on earth when its all over. i want to see her recovery. kory has a life full of trauma and this is just another in a long list, that she’ll probably be expected to deal with on her own bc shes the “emotionally intelligent” one. like no. let her go to her friends. have her and vic (and jess and jean paul i guess) bond over the horrible shit they went thru. have her go to dick for comfort, since shes always been there for him. have her talk it through with raven and donna, her two best friends. let her recover with the titans! i could write a whole story about it, but im waiting til jlo ends i guess. idk i want to see what happens next even tho im super confused most of the time.

unpopular opinion: this isnt really an unpopular opinion by any stretch but i hated her portrayal in RHATO. i mean i just hated that comic in general, i couldnt get through it, but they did kory so dirty in the name of making jason look cool. they got rid of her whole (extensive) history with the titans, HER FAMILY, whom she adored and who helped her through so much! they made her seem naive again, the amnesia thing was really a cheap trick. also, putting her with roy was kinda... like it wasnt a terrible idea, but it was weird, given their history. and the fact that the were both wildly ooc of course. anyway this could turn into an essay breaking down all the shit about rhato that i hated but ill stop for now.

favorite relationship: oh man, it would have to be with dick, bc their love is so pure and sweet and they care for each other so deeply even when theyre not together. however i also love how close her friendship with vic is. and donna of course.

favorite headcanon: hm. that she pegs? lol no jk thats basically canon. the one that is coming most to mind now is my idea that kory is super embedded in the fashion world and is really quite famous. she rubs elbows with supermodels and movie stars, but it never phases her bc a) she’s a literal princess and b) she treats all people with equal respect. i love that she had an already existing friendship with jennie-lynn in outsiders 2003, my headcanon is that they became friends while modelling and just both happened to be superheroes. I think kory deserves some model friends! the titans will always be her family but i like the idea of her branching out a little and having a bit of a normal life on earth, although it must be frequently interrupted by her superhero antics.

#thank u for asking!#ask #my post

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rqs902 · 4 years

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a lin ran feature :’) i respect hes self-aware about his need to be more than cute to succeed. lin ran has always given me a vibe that hes very serious and tough on himself. he looks soft but has high demands and seems very determined to get what he wants.

im not worried about li hao bc hes surrounded by a bunch of kids who can teach him how to dance LOL not just lin ran but like jin fan and tianci too

what is this pole and could they not move it LOL

lol so jin fan and tianci did a flippy trick and we just gonna pretend like it didnt happen lol okay

ugh so jin fan kinda got to do more dancing than other stages but i was still hoping itd be more!!! but man lin ran is really killing with his stage presence here

leave it to ycw to speak loudly and vocally about his friends being injured so people recognize their suffering

LOL lin ran’s sassy “im not stupid!!” but yea the third stage was really rough for him, so im glad he was able to recover

LOL lin ran again casually threatening the production team to be like “please edit this stage well” “please don’t cut our segment short” LOL

lol yea im not surprised at this point that li hao won even tho it shouldve been lin ran. youku is def making these rankings up. lol gjm did you even look at lin ran’s facial expressions???? lol making up excuses for youku wat

lin mo praising lin ran and giving him encouragement like a true bro bc he knows how hard lin ran worked for this stage. i wonder if he designed the stage rigging

AY I RESPECT OSCAR. hes a good kid and someone whos willing to speak his mind to address problems, thats awesome. they need someone to do that. he’s direct with the problems but also directly follows by complimenting them and saying how great they could be if they pulled through LOL hes still a kid so hes trying not to offend them but i respect his courage, warmth and dependability.

LOL XUE EN DESTROYED FRANKLIN HAHAHAHAHAHHA and he goes all cutesy after like he has no idea the power he holds LOL but im glad they showed some footage of xue en also teaching the other kids dance. cto skills whooo

ycw still bringing up shiwei? hes either very caught up in his feelings still (which is probably not a good thing at this point) or hes just a really dedicated friend... or youku is just purposefully using shiwei’s elimination for dramatic effect.

im surprised they didnt highlight cxh more bc youku seems to like him, and conversely they gave xzx a ton of time for his stage and let xzx win.

XUE EN IS SO HANDSOME

okay i just needed to get that out of my system

but also im kinda glad syh is in this group bc hes the only one who i will not laugh at when singing this song. ycw and oscar talking about drinks and whiskey??? yall are babies?? also this song does NOT match this dance well at all. i see why they didnt like it when they previewed it LOL also i see now why i saw an edit on twitter of this dance over “retreat” from qcyn bc that song actually FIT the tie pulling move.. versus this im just like ??? seems so out of place??

also their voices all sound weird :\ maybe its just too high of a register for ycw and cxh? or maybe theyre just not very good at singing....? lol

giving xue en the only multi colored tie? THEY KNEW.

im just happy that the party group was able to make their stage so well that other kids were regretting not choosing them bc ycw was really struggling to get people to join him...

LOL CSP BEING SILLY TO ZHAN YU THIS IS THE FRIENDSHIP I NEED

LOL XZX AND LIN MO are adorable together

im glad that they spent time to say zhaohao has improved, i feel like hes gotten zero recognition so far. i feel like ycw winning is the only win i am willing to believe so far. (couldve been xue en too tho)

A FEATURE ON XIKAN’S FRIENDSHIP WITH LUO ZHENG omggggggggggggggg luo zheng the sweetest ge, leaving all the good things for xikan whatt ugh but luo zheng is like literally going actor route so sad that he still wants to be on stage but has no opportunities. im grateful theyre still so close that xikan starts crying just thinking about him

xikan being involved in the stage design and costuming and all makes me think of lin ran but also makes me think of cai xukun. cxk always gets so involved in every little detail to seek perfection

interesting that they focused it all on zry and lxk........ but at least highlighted xikan’s fun side

lol they purposefully cut in fan yu screaming zry’s name and ycw yelling cyc....

but also tbh xikan’s voice was not very strong during his high note and i know hes giving 110% into his dancing so im guessing he doesnt have much air left at that point but i was kinda disappointed it couldve been better. BUT he still did a good job. i thought the part where they ripped off his jacket couldve been more impactful? but it felt like it was just randomly in the middle of the rap break and he doesnt sing again until much later so it was like why did you change clothes there?

tbh this song isnt that exciting? so im surprised that they wanted it that badly?

i saw spoilers that fan yu was gonna be there and its adorable and i love their friendship but lol zuo ye being like i shouldve asked all my gege’s to come.... lol aka they know its kinda unfair for fan yu to be winning votes for zry

im grateful all the trainees are supportive of xikan and they purposefully showed a bunch of popular kids cheering for xikan

gosh that injury on his nose, you know hes put too much energy and is too invested into his dance part when he rips his own face like that :\

i saw spoilers that renyu would win and someone did the math that it makes zero sense for their group’s score to be that low, but i didnt expect their score to be THAT low.... goodness wtf thats definitely rigged, i see why people were mad.

renyu winning is either entirely rigged bc youku wants him to debut or people are really just voting for him bc fan yu was there and that’s not fair either. i love renyu (and his friendship with fan yu) but there’s no way renyu actually won that many votes on a stage where he didnt really show his vocals that much and he messed up his dancing and he was surrounded by kids who danced much better and wouldve made him look not great. this makes zero sense. and the fact that ycw is the only winner that made sense is probably bc youku was like well we cant make it too obvious that its all a joke. but really, its all a joke.

yes i love that renyu worked hard and stayed up all night but can we talk about how xikan does that for every stage? and renyu’s just now started to do so. renyu just came into this competition less prepared, so his improvement is easier to see.

i still think if youku wants to debut renyu, theyll kick out lin ran from top 7, but can we talk about how lin ran put in all the effort to design and perfect his stage? how he teaches others to dance and pushes his group mates to shine as a leader and how he has truly one of the most memorable and formidable stage presences on this whole show? people say the debuting group will need renyu’s voice but how can you really say that renyu fits and is prepared and deserves to debut more than lin ran?

renyu is adorable and talented but let’s be real, as a vocalist, hes not like you zhangjing, hes not like zhao lei, hes not like zhao pinlin, hes not proven that he really fits to be a main vocal in a boy band. youku cannot force us into believing that he can fit that role without any evidence to prove his worth. its like theyre trying to jam someone into that role and its like renyu’s their closest bet, but even tho he still doesnt quite fit, theyre just gonna shove him in anyway. this is what happens when you only give attention to people who are dancers and dont give actual attention to people who are actually boy band main vocal material.... /COUGH ZHAN YU or even cui shaopeng??

how can you possibly believe that renyu got 173 but their average was 134? none of xikan’s groups numbers make sense:

how did shengen suddenly drop so much? youku has been touting him this whole time into the top 10. shouldnt more of xikan’s fans voted for xuyu? bc he literally begged during the last elim for xuyu to make it this far. xuyu wasnt even dead last in the elim ranking but here he gets last place by like 15 votes??? when everyone else’s vote difference is like half of that at max?

you expect me to believe lin ran only got 127 after he literally descended from the ceiling as an angel? that doesnt attract attention? how are both zuo ye and hu wenxuan so low? wenxuan was literally center and had bright pink hair, and in a song style that suited him, you cant tell me he didnt shine on this stage. xikan tied with xzx???? beneath a kou cong and su xunlun tie??? no way

theres one week left and youku’s getting desperate to make it look like whatever they’re going to make happen will be a natural result, that this competition is up in the air and no one is safe, but it just seems very questionable to me.

sooo does this mean there arent gonna be elims before the finals or what, we just dont see them announce who gets to perform? im assuming not all 32 kids will take part? and theres not gonna be a mentor collab stage? it wouldve been cool to see han yu and cheng xiao with the kids. there were 3 stages between the first and second elimination but no third elim and no mentor stage? its a mad rush to the end, honestly.

oh well, we still love these CHILDREN

ps: if youve been following my rants, i honestly feel like i have had a really positive impression of zheng renyu from the start and i really do like him. he makes really good songs and his voice is very nice and his friendships are pure and his attitude is commendable. 凄美地 and 當帷幕落下 and 後來的我們 are some of my favorite favorite songs to listen to from this entire show, like probably 3 of my top 5, and a good deal of that is because of renyu and his voice. but im just trying to be realistic and renyu is not in my ideal debuting boy band.

#rants #you would think that with the money and fans that kids like lxk hwx lm are bringing to youku that youku would treat them better

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ot3 · 5 years

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i’d love to hear you talk about SU’s problems if you have any more thoughts on it? some of the concepts from the show are brilliant and original, but i can never put my finger on what makes the “daily lives” ones so boring to watch. especially when they’re supposed to enhance the show’s themes and establish the backstory of what the main cast’s fighting for

@steakbatter I am SO sorry it took me over a month to answer this. It took a LOT of thinking to come up with anything. So here’s my main thesis: Adventure Time is primarily a slice of life show, and moreso than anything else I feel like the intent of most of their episodes is to create a Feeling. The specifics of what happens in your average adventure time episode don’t matter - most of them have what I’d almost call a monster of the week type format.

By contrast, Steven Universe is a show that has no footing without it’s overarching plot. Steven Universe has somewhere it’s going from the very beginning well established, whereas adventure time just sort of shambles mindlessly towards storyline. And this makes a HUGE difference because it’s the precedent for tone.

In Burning Low (S4E16) we see Finn have a huge confrontation with bubblegum, and he and flame princess get badly injured, and almost die. The episode that immediately follows it - BMO Noire (S4E17) is about BMO roleplaying as a detective to find Finn’s missing sock. This doesn’t bother me at all because the precedent of Adventure Time is a slow build - smaller bits of character development slipping out from between the cracks of their kooky worldbuilding, rather than being the show’s central focus. Adventure time, as a series, is built more like a mosaic or a puzzle - as long as you know your general framework, you can fill in the pieces in any order and end up with a full picture.

By contrast, Steven Universe, which is absolutely a vessel for telling a story more than it is a vessel for worldbuilding or character development. It’s built more like a tower - you have to start at point A and work your way to point B. Then there’s the matter of the slice of life aspects that do exist in the SU lineup. I think the absolute Peak example of SU’s misuse of slice of life is The Good Lars (S4E23) The central conflict of this episode is that Lars gets invited to a potluck by the cool kids, and want to bring an ube roll cake. Lars is sensitive about his baking (a la high school musical) and decides to ditch the whole thing, throwing his homemade cake in the garbage.

I say this episode exemplifies where SU goes wrong because it didn’t show us anything new. We’ve known that Lars is aggressive because he is masking deep insecurities. We know that Steven wants to encourage him to be more friendly and outgoing. We know Sadie wants the same. We establish nothing new about the character’s personalities, their relationships to each other, the larger plot of the show, or the worlbuilding.

Now, once again, obviously most Adventure Time episodes don’t establish a ton of these things either, but it’s not because they’re doing it poorly - it’s because the adventure time oneshots have a fundamentally different purpose than Steven Universe oneshots.

Another thing hat happens in The Good Lars: Steven refers to his mother, Verbatim, as a war criminal. Technically correct, but also incredibly tonally bizarre in the episode. It doesn’t feel like a natural way of integrating the harsher reality of Steven’s world to the mundane life in the rest of beach city; it feels like theyre just saying ‘Hey, don’t worry, we’re still going somewhere with this. Now watch Lars mope more.

So lets take a look at an Adventure Time oneshot episode. I’m going to try and pick one that follows an equally mundane set of events as The Good Lars to make sure it’s a fair comparison. In Video Makers (S2E23) Finn and Jake just spent the whole time trying to film a movie, because they woefully misunderstand pre-apocalyptic copyright law. They then spend the rest of the episode fighting about whether it’s a romance movie or an action movie, shooting a bunch of terrible footage. BMO compiles the movie and in the end it’s a movie about Finn and Jake being friends and why they shouldn’t fight.

Equally as unsubstantial as the steven universe episode. Equally as banal and saccharine. And yet, whereas The Good Lars is probably my least favorite ep of SU besides the racist uncle episode, I really really like Video Makers. And it’s because we don’t need to see character growth or plot growth in every episode of adventure time. Adventure time keeps itself open to, lets call it, ‘horizontal storytelling’ where we’re just given snapshots of moments within a world, as opposed to a straight narrative. Steven universe has, by contrast, ‘vertical storytelling’ where the process of going from point A to point B is the show’s frame.

This is so long i’m so sorry

#Adventure time #steven universe #I DON'T HATE STEVEN UNIVERSE #LET ME JUST SAY THAT HERE #i have a lot of critiques about it #but mainly because it had so much POTENTIAL that i don't think it ever reached #steakbatter

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comicteaparty · 5 years

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December 27th, 2018 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party chat that occurred on December 27th, 2018, from 5PM - 7PM PST. The chat focused on Inhibit by Eve Greenwood / evegwood.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

RebelVampire

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB START!

Good evening, everyone~! This week’s Thursday Book Club is officially beginning! Today we are discussing Inhibit by Eve Greenwood / evegwood~! (http://www.inhibitcomic.com/)

Remember that Thursday discussions are completely freeform! However, every 30 minutes I will drop in OPTIONAL discussion questions in case you’d like a bit of a prompt. If you miss out on one of these prompts, you can find them pinned for the chat’s duration. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is fun and respectfully appreciating the comic. All that said, let’s begin!

QUESTION 1. What is your favorite scene in the comic so far and why?

there are many great scenes, but i am particularly fond of victor in the parking garage. specifically, i enjoy the unfolding of events once masha joins the party. i love the fact that victor freezes up and just flat out doesnt know what to do. not only does this fit with his character, but i actually think its refreshing for a protagonist with powers to still just be a regular person deep down who does not have the required training to deal with that sort of situation. not to mention i love seeing paulina's powers in action

spire

Agreed! The garage is one of my favorites too. I love how Paulina is breaking rules left and right- not just laws (lol) but all the concepts that have been established so far about how powers are supposed to work. I really want to figure out what's going on(edited)

RebelVampire

or is she breaking laws? as in the powers. obviously shes breaking the other sorts of laws like dont set ppls property on fire. but i will save theories on the powers for a bit later. i do enjoy that she throws a wrench already into what's established. tho i felt bad for victor that nobody is listening to him.

another scene ive been enjoying is the current flashback where victor is a bouncy child. mostly because i love how excited about everything victor is. like wanting explosions just cause its cool. and i think its just this real contrast that builds tension for the narrative since youre like "victor man what happened O_O"

spire

No one listened to him then and no one listens to him now. I would love it if someone took him seriously for once

I would also love it it someone let him REST

RebelVampire

yeah my heart really hurts for him. because ive been in that position of sitting there constantly trying to tell someone something and then being ignored.

although i really think ppl need to learn moderation in regards to their expectations for victor most of all

cause it seems like ppl either 1) expect nothing from victor and think hes a loser or 2) pull a nate and expect victor to auto be this extremely capable person despite not having trained for anything in years

Superjustinbros

*jumps in

Hello~!

RebelVampire

hey super!

Superjustinbros

Hey Rebel!

Pleased to be here~

spire

Hello~

Superjustinbros

And hello to you too, Spire!

RebelVampire

another scene that i enjoy was when julia, david, and victor snuck back in to the building to eavesdrop. on a technical level i liked the writing for it because it was a scene that moved the plot along but also served to show off the relationship dynamics that exist between those specific characters. so as a narrative construct everything in that scene felt like it had purpose to one end or the other.

Superjustinbros

I just want to say, the faces in this comic are incredible.

http://www.inhibitcomic.com/comics/2658763/chapter-5-pg-11/ Especially this one on the bottom right

And then they play bloody Laser Tag

RebelVampire

yeah the faces on the kid are really some fantastic exaggerations

Superjustinbros

Oh yes

RebelVampire

but suits them cause theyre kids

Superjustinbros

There's lots of fun to be had with giving characters over the top faces.

RebelVampire

QUESTION 2. Victor has been shown to be a drastically different person than he was in his youth. What is the past incident that several characters bring up that apparently resulted in a trial and inevitably got Victor kicked out of Urquhart? What does it have to do with Masha, and do you think Julia was involved somehow considering she’s also at Earl Estate? Is it the reason Nate and Victor’s relationship soured as well? Do you believe the incident is what changed Victor so much, or is it several aspects of his life? Do you think any of this has something to do with why Victor has failed to improve at Earl Estate? Also, why do you believe Victor’s inhibitors are now failing him so badly? Lastly, do you believe his missions with Nate will have an effect on Victor’s personality? How so?

Superjustinbros

tfw it's already time to answer question 2

I'll stop posting these to the chat now

RebelVampire

well considering adult victor has some issue controlling his powers when hes emotional, im gonna assume something of that nature happened. potentially maybe to that bully who keeps picking on young masha. cause i feel like victor is gonna stand up to them or attempt to and get mad and then accidentally severely injure them or something. idk about julia being involved

tho looking back it looks like she has all her fingers as a child

Superjustinbros

That seems like a very good interpretation.

Considering he does shoot out electricity at impractical times, at least from what I've seen(edited)

RebelVampire

as for nate and victor's relationship souring, i think theres more at work than just this incident. i kind of get the impression that nate just kind of likes taking things out on victor even when everything has nothing to do with victor. but i think basically all this crap combined to shake victor's confidence and that's a large reason hes not improving. cause he just has no reason to be confident anymore.

spire

I think Vic's self worth has been raised into a precarious position thanks to being a gifted (in this case- super powered) child, and with how much his spark-outs are emphasized through the whole comic, something terrible must have happened with a spark and that lack of control was touted against him, which makes it near impossible to repair his self esteem

RebelVampire

yes definitely all that. cause i feel by and large that victor has just given up on himself. which tbf i dont blame him cause literally nobody is doing anything to help really. like theres not a truly positive influence. although to nate's credit i guess he's trying? just ya know, in a super bad way

spire

Lol yeah. That's a good way to put it

Nate is helping but in the worst way. Vic needs some genuine, earnest support

As for Julia, I suspect she gave herself frostbite? Noor is very strict about Julia forming ice around her limbs, and she must have been moved to Earl for a similar outburst of her own powers

RebelVampire

tbh i think julia has more control of her powers. from the impression i get anyway. i kind of think julia is just reckless and doesnt think her actions through. though i mean might of been an outburst too. i could really go either way. and maybe its both.

though frostbite is way more tame than what i was thinking happened XD

i was picturing more encasing an ice and then shattering said ice

frostbite sounds more reasonable and less horrific

spire

Omg

Julia just thought one day that it would be cool to be a snowman

She didn't consider the fact that she can't move. Once she becomes the snow man ️

RebelVampire

that sounds like something shed do. even now cause i dont feel shes anymore responsible than she was as a kid

which ya know narratively speaking is kind of a good contrast with victor in a way

spire

Yeah

RebelVampire

cause victor has no control of his powers but has a sort of reserved control of himself. whereas julia has control of her powers but is an explosion of bad decisions waiting to happen

spire

I love that about them. Despite Julia's recklessness I think it's good for Vic to not be sitting alone in his room 24/7

RebelVampire

idk i agree and disagree. its good for him to get out and socialize, but im not sure the ppl around him are well-suited to kind of give him teh space he needs.

tho tbf im not sure the estate is the healithiest place in general

it kind of feels like prison

QUESTION 3. Victor’s life changes a lot when he’s forced to join Nate’s team. Why do you think Nate is so vehement about having Victor as a temporary member on his team? Is he honestly just trying to help Victor, or is there is some other hidden reason? What did you think the way the retrievals were handled says about the world and its view on Variants? How might the first mission change Victor’s perspective on Variants and how they’re treated (if at all)? How will it affect how Victor deals with other team missions and/or the course of the story? Lastly, do you believe that Victor will be able to makes amends and bond with the team, or will he continue to be chastised and treated somewhat lesser?

spire

The way that variants are trained at places like Urq and Miller to almost solely police their own community is disturbing. Vic wants no part of it and it's perfectly understandable

Variants are monitored so closely through their whole lives. it's invasive.

RebelVampire

yeah. and i mean...theres a degree i want to be understanding. i would not want untrained variants just walking around causing accidents and such. cause theyve shown that their powers can be damaging not just to others but themselves and also all the property around them. so i can understand that variants kind of need a special thing going on for everyone's protection

but man do those places feel like prison

like when you cant even let someone's mom see their kid off

thats a bad sign

spire

In that kind of environment a variant is pressured to do whatever they can to appear trustworthy. Even if Nate is trying to help Vic out I think he's ultimately trying to make himself look better by helping Vic succeed

RebelVampire

that could be although i feel theres easier ways then making under the table secret deals. tho tbh i think theres a mix going on here. like i think nate does want to help victor and wants to see him succeed. but i also feel like nate isnt altruistic either. more like he wants to help victor cause he feels like victor is his one failure that he cant leave to continue to be a failure just for the sake of his own pride.

Superjustinbros

“I think he's ultimately trying to make himself look better by helping Vic succeed”

This thought caught my eyes

RebelVampire

although it could also be that nate sees something of himself reflected in victor. cause nate did freak out when masha wasnt just flat out listening to his captain's orders. and i kind of feel that reflects his own feelings of being unsure of himself

Superjustinbros

Perhaps

RebelVampire

but i kind of wonder if theres an issue of dormancy at play in all this? cause if nate feels like he's losing his powers and position soon, that could be a prime motivator in whatever he feels hes got to do

like hes running out of his chance to do that one super awesome thing that immortalizes him in history

spire

Ooooooooo that's a very interesting thought

Reminiscent of thinkin you need to be ultra successful by the time you're 30

I hadn't thought of nates motivation that way before :0

RebelVampire

yeah and this is kind of an extreme case of needing to be successful by 30. cause in this case its kind of true in a way. since im sure if youre a variant the powers are kind of part of who you are. but by 30 you lose that and essentially have to redefine who you are as a person. and i think thats more true with the way their system is set up since their glorified prisons are so life encompassing.

spire

Yeah. That's got to be terrifying, knowing your whole identity is going to disappear one day, one day SOON

RebelVampire

yes. or so were led to believe. cause tbf i got sinister vibes from that scene with the doctor checking young victor for dormancy. so maybe all we know is a lie and dormancy is not a natural process but something forced upon variants.

spire

OOOOOOOOHH

Terrifying if tru

Superjustinbros

Yeah that scene creeped me out a bit

and it just came out of nowhere

RebelVampire

cause i agree with young victor. why are you checking a kid for dormancy if you know the typical ages for dormancy

and i feel that line is there for a reason

spire

I wonder if he's still wondering that now, 9 years later?

And I hope he is

RebelVampire

maybe hell remember it

Superjustinbros

Exactly, Rebel. (about the dormacy part)(edited)

RebelVampire

cause to tie in the 2nd part of that question, i def think victor is on the path to see the injustice in how variants are treated

those facial expressions in the van were already on the extreme i feel sorry for these people side

QUESTION 4. Inadvertently, Victor becomes involved with a dangerous arsonist named Paulina. What do you think Paulina’s powers are? Is she a pyro as many believe, or is there something funky going on with her powers like Victor believes? Why do you believe Paulina attacked Miller, and why do you think she’s so desperately looking for Chalice? Where do you think Paulina even came from given she isn’t declaring any facility as her origin? Why, of all people, do you think Paulina went to Victor specifically for help? Given Victor gets Julia involved, how might the residents of Earl Estate affect Victor helping Paulina or not? In general, do you believe Victor will help Paulina or not, and how will this choice affect the rest of the story?

Superjustinbros

I'm going to say maybe she has multiple powers versus most of the other characters that only have one

spire

That's what I was thinking too

Superjustinbros

I mean she really is mysterious, since her profile is still //||?⁄⁄/⁄\ | on the site

RebelVampire

idk. i mean its certainly possible. but im also willing to think that she has one power that doesnt fit any of the predefined powers the world established. so like shes a new variant type. or that she knows how to use her pyro powers in a way that nobody thought possible

but multiple powers is still possible

im just more willing to error on the side of it still fitting in with established laws and we just dont get the full picture yet

Superjustinbros

maybe like dark/gravity powers, or some power that's otherwise considered taboo?

spire

I think ultimately Vic's going to be looking for some truth and working with Pauli will appear? To get him some answers

Superjustinbros

Considering het background is nothing like the others

And yeah, maybe that ends up happening

http://inhibit.smackjeeves.com/files/what.png I mean can anyone translate this(edited)

RebelVampire

no but its probably just for the purposes of making her mysterious

and wont change to not give new readers spoilers XD

spire

Yes I believe that's simply to keep it mysterious for new readers

Superjustinbros

Yeah

RebelVampire

i think victor will def help paulina, although im not sure i get the impression paulina is gonna inspire victor to look for truth persay. though if she gets him to chalice, i think chalice will make him question stuff.

Superjustinbros

Maybe, just maybe.(edited)

RebelVampire

i kind of get the impression that paulina didnt come from any facility but instead has been living and training outside the system. cause we dont really know the process by which the facilities collect variants in the first place. like obviously we see victor's mom bring victor. but like...was it the law? was it under threat hed be taken anyway? how did ppl know?(edited)

and without knowing these things i can think of a lot of reasons paulina just skirted by the system

Superjustinbros

Definitely could be something outside the system, since it's still a mystery

spire

I'm wondering if the only reason Pauli chased Vic down to Earl is because she has blackmail to make him help her find chalice. If she asked anyone else she's obvs get turned in to the police or taken home?? Wherever that is???

Well, I guess it's not really black mail. So I don't really know

RebelVampire

maybe paulina just picked him cause hes the only variant she knows now who didnt immediately try to arrest her

and tbf

victor is a good choice cause he would seem easy to intimidate into doing what you want him to do

spire

TRUE LMAO

RebelVampire

tho i couldnt fathom why she wants to find chalice. i mean the assumption is she wants their help. but maybe she super hates them and chalice is corrupt and bad. and that there is no good in this world. or something depressing like that.

Superjustinbros

lmao

Plus he's the protagonist

RebelVampire

paulina got super meta and said "hey victor you feel like a protagonist. you can probably help"

Superjustinbros

Protagonist Syndrome in a nutshell

RebelVampire

that makes me feel bad for victor. victor seems like the last person whod ever want to be a protagonist

just wants to sleep in his room instead

spire

Hashtag relatable tbh

Superjustinbros

Yes

RebelVampire

since we only have 4 mins left, are there any final thoughts to share?

Superjustinbros

I'd love to do the same lol

I want to say this has been a great read so far, it's got great characters, lots of emotion, and lots of charm.

(And lots of good expressions)

Good luck with the comic, Eve, it's really going strongly so far.

spire

I think inhibit really nails what it feels like to be pinned by the expectations put on you by all levels of society, but still allowing itself to breathe and be funny and so human

RebelVampire

i think inhibit is a great story with memorable personalities. but most of all it has a relateable protagonist whose inner demons can speak to most ppl, and watching his journey is definitely probably something that will inspire hope

unless victor dies

then no hope

COMIC TEA PARTY- THURSDAY BOOK CLUB END!

Sadly, this wraps up this week’s Thursday Book Club chat for now. Thank you so much to everyone for reading and joining us! We want to give a special thank you to Eve Greenwood / evegwood, as well, for making Inhibit. If you liked the comic, make sure to support Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s efforts however you’re able to~!

Read and Comment: http://www.inhibitcomic.com/

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Paypal Donation Link: https://www.paypal.me/evegwood

Eve Greenwood / evegwood’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/evegwood

Comic Tea Party- Thursday Book Club

Next week’s Thursday Book Club will be about Princess Pups by Lindsay Hornsby. For participants, you have the next week to read as much of the comic as you would like~! We hope to see you on Thursday, January 3rd, from 5PM to 7PM PST for the chat in #thursday_bookclub!

Comic’s Main Site: https://tapas.io/series/Princess-Pups

#ctparchive #comics #webcomics #indie comics #comic chat #comic discussion #book club #bookclub #webcomic book club #webcomic bookclub #comic tea party #ctp #inhibit #evegwood #eve greenwood

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chickenfetus · 6 years

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Hey! so I've been crushing on this girl for about 3 years, and I really wanna tell her I like her and ask her out but I'm terrified of damaging/ losing our 10 years of friendship :-( others have asked if we are dating because we are so close and she always denies it and makes it clear that we are just platonic friends. However, 5 months ago she messaged someone and told them that she liked me :o (She's also openly Bi) should I ask her out and risk losing everything or keep my feelings to myself?

HELloO!!! sorry im replying so late i was busy with schoolwork :^( also im really sorry if im replying Too late jhfghdggdhg

just a disclaimer: i dont know how good/useful my advice will be because ive had positive experiences when i confessed to my crushes so it might differ !!

more under cut!!

first of all, i think youre amazing?? the fact that youve had a crush on her for THREE years is ??? wrow u r braver than any us marine and i think its sweet youve liked her for so long!! also!! its cool that you guys have been friends for TEN?? years???? and i can see why youre worried about confessing!!

i think the reason she denies it when ppl ask is bc well. its not true so its not like she can say Yeah We’re Dating dhhdjdh BUt it might also be for your sake?? mayhaps she doesnt want to make you uncomfortable bc she doesnt know how you feel!! so id say dont take to heart too much!

now for the most important part: confessing. i know its fuCKing scary to confess to someone, because you dont know how the other person will react but i believe that confessing is better than not doing anything at all

for me, im someone whos confessed to almost all of my crushes, for girls, i make sure theyre not straight before confessing because GOD KNOWS how confessing to a straight girl will end up lmao... frankly speaking none of my crushes actually liked me back long enough for us 2 start dating, and even if they did im afraid of relationships so nothing ever happened

HOWEVER im still good friends with the two girls ive confessed to, and i think as someone who knows you very well, your friend won’t like. ghost you because thatd be terrible. of course i’d understand creating some distance for a short period of time if you confess but i doubt she’d stop talking to you forever, seeing as youve been friends for ten years!!

its also a big plus that shes openly bi!!!! i dont rly know how she’ll react for sure, but despite that i’d say give it a shot! maybe confess first, before asking her out. see how she reacts first! i think anybody would be flattered that somebody likes them! !!! i wont touch on the her telling someone she likes you part because i dont know how reliable that information is.,,

another thing -- dont get your hopes up. i know that part might’ve given you some encouragement but remember, its been 5 months dont go confessing because you KNOW she likes you back, confess because you WANT her to know about your feelings. dont expect a relationship right after confessing, because how you react to her response matters!! naturally its okay to feel down bc she doesnt like u back but DONT say “i thought you liked me!” because thats placing expectations on your friend and it might make her feel guilty if you react really badly

though i trust that you know why you’re confessing to her !! i know you want to ask her out but let’s save that for after she’s responded and as much as possible try to hold the conversation in real life so you can observe her body language (but dont get too overly conscious of it!)

go in with an open mind, and believe in her. she wouldn’t let this ruin your friendship and if she rejects you, own it. if she rejects you, give up on her, you spent three years pining for her, now you can move on after like. getting that closure??

OF COURSE if its requited then thatd be fantastic, and ill be happy for you!!! i wish you all the best, and hope all turns out in your favour! (be it she returns your feelings or the outcome of your friendship)

if the friendship does get ruined, it wont be on you because its not like you can help who you fall for, and i think you’re once again, super brave for considering confessing!!

tldr; dont keep your feelings to yourself, tell her! no matter what happens, it wont be as bad as you think!! have faith in yourself and her, in the event something doesn’t work out, don’t forget how you tried!! no regrets okay anon?? i love you and you’re amazing! if youve already confessed and asked her out, tell me how it went!

ALSO if you would like more opinions on what to do,, you can ask my friend falen but shes on s/h so she might take some time to respond and idk how often she gets on tumblr nowadays but i have another friend chloe who could be of help too!!

ALL THE BEST ANON!! you can do it!

#Anonymous #asks

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conflictedlooksgood-blog · 6 years

Text

WE NEED TO TALK & NW/CRYBABY MUSIC VIDEO INTERPRETATION

Okay so in the opening of " we need to talk" we see Awsten walking with a floral shirt. The flowers are of a plain simple print but the flowers could be recognised as " forget me nots", "marigold" and "gerberas". In the language of flowers, Forget me nots speak 'true love; memories'. Marigolds express 'grief and jealousy' and lastly the gerberas ( which are of mixed colour on his shirt, mostly red with a ring of white ) can be interpreted as; red means ' unconscious in love ' and the white symbolising purity and child likeness. The shirt itself is blue which can be tied to meanings or feelings such as depression or an ocean / sea. The flowers being on the shirt mixed with the blue evokes the sense that the feelings implied by the flowers ( memories of love, grief, jealousy, purity, childlike and being unconscious in love ) comes in waves and are of an oceans extent of feeling; deep and dangerous being so easy to be pulled in and drown in.

Flowers are also a big part seen in the NW/CRYBABY video as a door glows yellow through its cracks and awsten opens it to find roses of pink and red and sunflowers. The roses symbolise sympathy and conveying deep emotion and the sunflowers mean adoration and loyalty. These flowers are then ripped apart into petals and are exploding in awstens face flinging him onto the bed which symbolise, all qualities that should be found in a relationship are thrown away and aren't valid from his ex girlfriend but are seen together and whole when he is singing in the background, showing that he holds these deep emotions and qualities. This is then linked and further proved to "WE NEED TO TALK" as we see his girlfriend in this video see the same yellow glow through the cracks and had decided not to open the door of the flowers/feelings as awsten did, showing she doesn't hold these qualities and had pushed them away instead.

Next we see awsten waiting outside her door which holds the numbers 103. Numbers can have their own meanings and in "angel numbers" ( I used this "angel" meanings as further reference to the religious symbols found throughout the video and that this is before he "dies" ). '1' seen in a negative aspect can signify incompleteness and conflict. '0' can be symbolic of truth and finally '3' resonates with religious ambitions ( this again links to multiple religious references ). As we learn the meaning of the number '103' it then foreshadows what happens when he enters the apartment as the following scenes are filled with , incompleteness, conflict, truth and religious aspects ( as he gets ressurected )

As we then enter the lounge room we can spot quickly the same fairy lights hung up which was previously seen in the music video clip ' lucky people'. In lucky people awsten constantly was wrapping the lights around his neck throughout the clip which can be interpreted in many ways of "suicidal thoughts", "thoughts of his loved one is choking him up making it hard to breath" " the light of his life making him be silent "ect ect but the key symbol is that the lights are constantly a reminder and are kinda seen as a bad omen towards love. This then means and also foreshadows as its seen multiple times in the background that the current relationship he is in is toxic and is going to end badly.

Then as we do end up seeing awsten and his girlfriend arguing we are given a camera angle of him and a mirror behind reflecting only himself. This is symbolic of him have his own inner mental argument in the middle of the verbel argument he is currently having. This reflects that there were two opinions and possible outcomes he was fighting over with himself of which he had chosen to break the window and take his own life. we can only assume that he was deciding in that moment right then and there whether he should make the jump and end it all.

As he then lies there with his same floral shirt, it rolls in the wind giving a wave like effect as spoken in the beginning establishing that the waves of emotions had finally pulled him in and he had drowned.

Awsten is then seen wearing a white jumper which it's colour/shade can be associated with safety and its plainness compared to what he had been wearing is symbolic that he now feels nothing compared to what he had felt and he finds a kind of comfort and "safeness" in the numb 'dead inside' feeling ;;

We also see awstens girlfriend later in the clip also wearing a white jumper. She appears to be happy when she is with him and that when they sit together he is unconscious and unaware of what is happening around him and she is content with that compared to the beginning of the clip when he was 'alive'. This shows how much she had tried to change him and had finally been happy with a version of awsten that wasn't actually himself. she couldn't handle his deep hold of emotions he and had pushed him to a point where he wasn't truly him anymore. Her wearing the white shows how emotionless she is towards awsten.

Then at the end of the 'we need to talk clip! / the transition into 'nw/crybaby' clip his jumper turns to red. Red is associated with war, danger, desire and love. He is in a constant war with himself over his desires of love and its dangerous. It foreshadows the future mental fight he has in his bedroom about ridding the memories of his ex girlfriend.

Then by the end of the video he is back to wearing blue but this time it holds no "flowers" instead it is bold and symbolic of depth and stability which shows he is finally alive and himself again ( further proved through the symbolism of the car which is explained further on ).

Reoccuring throughout both videos is the colors blue and yellow of which awsten is constantly spotted in blue lighting and his girlfriend is seen in yellow ( which is also a direct link to stupid for you " you're yellow im natural blue" ). Blue is often associated to depth and stability but is also socially viewed as sadness and depression and yellow can be seen as positivity, loyalty and intellect but on the other hand can represent cowardice and deceit. Awsten has creatively expressed to his audience how in this relationship he holds deep emotion and is the one who usually keeps it stable and although his lover appears to be bright and positive and loyal they had also deceived him.

The blue lighting allows us to understand were seeing things from awstens perspective and are hearing his thoughts, its otherworldly is very prominent as its symbolic of his deep emotions and that we aren't currently viewing the world from our eyes. whereas the yellow lighting is from his exs perspective and it lacks emotion and we hardly see it, that being because we never truly do see things from both perspectives , he can only tell his side of the story.

The tapes found in both videos hold a lot of meaning, they symbolise the memories of the relationship. In 'we need to talk' his girlfriend had only tripped over one tape, it was small, was hardly seen and she had easily gotten over it whereas in 'nw/crybaby' the tapes are suffocating him. Theyre all over his skin, his clothes, his walls, his bed and entire room. It shows how more in depth this had effected him and the mental state he's left in. The hand that comes out of the pillow is a literal representation of how his thoughts are pulling at his head and we see him just trying to rip all of these tapes off him as he desperately tries to get rid of these memories.

Geoff and otto are also seen in these videos ( ofc theyre also in the band smh ) but are the literal representation of your friends supporting you and always there. Theyre seen in 'we need to talk' in the lounge room with awsten as he sings which shows they support him and are aware of the situation of the time. Then in the video of 'nw/ crybaby' it gets more complicated as we see awsten aggressively knocking on his door but visibly not making a sound as they don't flinch and continue playing their game in content, this shows that as much as awsten wants to reach out to his friends for help, voicing his problems isn't easy and he doesn't want to put his struggles onto them so he suffers in silence.

In the end of 'nw/crybaby' we see Awsten, Otto and Geoff enter the car in the driveway. Geoff is driving and as stated by awsten he is seen as the "dad" of the group and is usually the one to count on when things are getting hard and that you can open up and talk to him about things , awsten opens the door ( being symbolic of finally opening up to them ) and had let Geoff 'steer' :') him into the right direction with otto behind him giving him extra support. Finally as they come to a stop they smash the car together and this is symbolic that he is not turning back and he isn't going down that path again. The yellow paint on the car metaphorically refers to his ex as a direct link back "stupid for you". He had then spray painted " entertainment " in blue on the car which can be interpreted as that, because of her deceiving and childlike games he was finally " entertained" and had gotten over her and that he had moved on from that part of his life. It doesn't hurt or effect him anymore and he can finally laugh at all the things she had put him through.

Finally, linking to the flames, awstens lighter becomes symbolic. The same lighter his ex had used to bring him back from the dead to light the candles, the scene was seen in yellow further symbolising it was from her point of view and she had used it as if she had burnt away awstens past self. we clearly see its not awstens true self as he is in his "zombie" like state. Awsten then uses it in the 'nw/crybaby' video as he also burns his past self aka the car. She was apart of his past and everything she had linked to him he had gotten rid of with a flame. Both awsten and his ex had burned and destroyed their links and ties to each other. Flames can be associated with creation, destruction and transformation.

I now present to you an Awsten who had created relationships, destroyed relationships and has transformed into a new person through these heartbreaks.

#parxboys #waterparx #waterparks #theory #nw crybaby #not warriors crybaby #we need to talk #awsten #awsten knight #otto wood #otto #geoff wigington #geoff #interpretation

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