#literally just ruining the game for everybody goddamn

[creepypastalover97]

Time for another creepypasta au headcannon

Today’s headcannon is about Tim/Masky.

Just to clarify, I know marble hornets has nothing to do with creepypasta. And I also know that Masky and even hoodie are not proxies. But I love them so I’m involving them.

Warning ⚠️: mention of suicide.

Any let’s get on with the headcannons

Here we go

. I’ll elaborate on this at some later date but Tim, Brian weren’t proxies during the events of Marble Hornets, only afterwards.

. There’s no real difference between Tim and Masky anymore. Due to Slender Man turning him into a proxy “Masky” is just Tim wearing a mask instead of a separate personality altogether. Everybody uses the names “Tim” and “Masky” interchangeably and Tim will answer to Masky when he’s not even wearing the mask.

. He has schizophrenia, sometimes has seizures ( or used to anyway) anger issues, and like toby he also has amnesia.

. Tim’s strong as fuck. He can lift people up and throw them with very little effort. He’s picked up Jeff and thrown him headfirst into a dumpster before. He’d do it again.

. He’s not the most logical at times, but is fairly rational.

. Tim’s salty as fuck and sasses everyone. EVERYONE. This man has guts to even talk back to Slenderman.

. He gets easily annoyed by the others sometimes, because they can just be so ridiculous.

“2 am is not the time to climb a tree, Kate”-masky

. As I’m sure half the fandom has joked about by now, he has the strongest sideburn game.

. He's a natural heavyweight

. Masky has quite the dad bod. What I mean by this is, he's bulky. His muscles aren't heavily defined, but they're there, especially in his arms.

. He is n o t a morning person. At all. Try and wake him up before 9 and you’re signing your death warrant.

. He runs on caffeine and pure spite.

. His wardrobe consists nearly entirely of jeans, flannels and maybe a few plain tshirts

. Tim is very musically inclined. He can play guitar, bass guitar, ukulele, and piano. He also so sings, however he keeps all of this to himself because he is not a performer and refuses to play for anyone.

. he is currently a poly and is in a relationship with hoodie and skully (jay did die in my au, I will explain how and why he is alive at a later date)

. Knows a lot about cars

. Masky is actually a victim in the mansion and do mental breakdowns often because the others are just horrible with him cause it's so goddamn funny to watch him suffer-

Masky: “WILSON!!!SLOW DOWN!!SLOW THE F*** DOWN!

Wilson the basher fast and furious-ing though the woods

Wilson the basher: “ alright mr. panic at the everywhere you need to relax. Relaxing music?”

Starts blasting death metal trough the van’s speakers

Masky: “ THIS IS NOT SOOTHING! THIS IS MADNESS!!!!”

Wilson the basher: “ oh don’t worry I have a special song for you”

Proceeds to put on the gummy bear song and starts head banging.

Masky:”AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

. This guy has some massive bed head when he does wake up. I mean it looks like he got electrocuted it sticks up in every direction but it’s really soft and fluffy.

. This guy drinks his coffee black. No cream, no sugar, nada.

. Likes sunflowers.

. Smokes when he’s stressed. He hates when he’s chasing a victim and loses his breath, and coughs a lot.

. Every year Tim makes his new year’s resolution “quit smoking” and every year he ruins it by smoking literally the next day.

. Tim has a small collection of very expensive colognes ( of which he stole.) he prefers the expensive, strong smelling ones because it distracts people from the stench of cigarettes that constantly follows him.

. He cant STAND Toby, Cody, and Circe(partially, can't completely not stand her, because the kid looks up to him as a father figure), he always thinks that they shouldn't be proxies . Not because they’re annoying, but because they’re young. He also can’t stand how enthusiastic they are about killing.

. Toby is the one who started the rumors that Tim/Masky is obsessed with cheesecake, he did it to mock Masky’s build. Masky got toby back by spreading rumors that toby is obsessed with waffles.

. While he vehemently despises cheesecake with all his heart he does have a favorite food: pineapple pizza. He is positively obsessed with pineapple pizza and Hoodie is more disturbed by this than when Tim literally murdered him.

. Masky has a tiny (big)fear of dogs. He hopped into one of his targets backyard and ended up getting chased by a huge Great Dane. He now makes Hoodie go in first when hopping fences. Dogs love that man. Tis very strange.

. He can read emotions and teleport (powers he developed while being a proxy to the slenderman.)

. He can be overprotective over people he truly cares about. Like really overprotective. Not letting anything happen to them.

Though first you need to earn his trust and then he will give world to you.

. He vibes to Johnny Cash, John Lennon, Bon Jovi, ect.

. Masky for whatever, reason is scarily good at calculating percentages without the use of a calculator. He basically is the calculator. He’ll just be like:

“Oh yes, there’s a 76.632% chance that lady falling off the CN tower”-Masky

And he’s right. Every. Fucking. Time.

Even hoodie has no idea how he does it, but within 2 seconds he’ll have the exact answer, and it’s funny because he failed math classes when he was still in the hospital.

Bonus: he failed math on purpose to annoy his teachers.

. Still kinda has… issues with his leg. Sometimes wears a brace.

. hates if anyone mentions anything about his height since he’s one of the shortest of the male proxies . He is 5′6 tall.

. Masky owns a red truck with four seats, and he loves that truck so much.

. He makes lots of dad jokes and chuckles at them.

. Whenever he leaves for a few minutes he usually comes back to toby breaking a bone, x-virus passed out, Kate and Brian confused, rouge gone, Wilson crying over the fact rouge is gone, and Circe just recording all of this to post on TikTok.

Does he react?

No cuz he is the definition of everything is fine meme.

. Post- marble hornets Tim freaked out when the Slenderman came to collect him. Tim at the time did not know that the operator and the Slenderman were separate entities. So he assumed the Slenderman was the operator. In attempt to avoid being under the control of who he thought was the operator, he tried to shoot himself in the head with a pistol. A course the Slenderman man stopped him by knocking him out and proceeded to take him back to the slender mansion.

. He was hella confused when he found out hoodie was still alive but happy that his friend was alive. Turns out slenderman had found hoodie and brought him back to the mansion as well.

. Masky still has a hard time believing that the slender man and the operator are not the same being. Tho there are times he sees proof that they are not the same.

Slenderman carrying Circe: “ I have adopted a another human. And I have apple juice.”- slenderman

Masky: “ you what?”

Slenderman: “ I got more apple juice”

Masky:” yeah, let’s pretend that’s what I was talking about “

. He was never allowed to have sweets as a kid, some of the pasta’s think that’s why he’s so bitter all the time.

. Some believe that Masky has forgotten his past when he was still just”Tim” and only knows the life of a proxy but that is false. Masky remembers jay and Alex and his past as Timothy wright. He feels immense guilt over what happened to Alex’s film crew. He still thinks it’s his fault that the Operator began stalking the Marble Hornets cast. He also blames himself for Jay’s death.

. Every once in a while he checks up on Jessica to make sure she’s safe (don’t worry, she is). He tried getting BEN to do it for him but all he did was spread a rumor around the Mansion that Tim had a girlfriend. Tim retaliated by flushing BEN’s cartridge down the toilet.

Overall Tim/Masky just wants peace, but he’s not getting that anytime soon.

Well I hope you liked it.

P.s. just know this is a au, not every thing is canon. So don’t hate. If you don’t like it, go somewhere else, thank you. Bye 👋🏻

P.s.s. Go check out circe’s origin story on archive of our own. It’s called rabbits are not what they seem.

#creepypasta world building #masky marble hornets #slender proxy #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta

[cravingbro]

Chocolate Ice Cream

siblings oneshot au: 1,8k words — harsh words, mention of mature content, bunch of physical attacks, contains some sweets (literally), and a mere hallucination.

There were days when he turned into a giant-goddamn-annoying baby, especially when our parents were out for late night work or him currently being single and desperate. Those days I had to sacrifice my mental stability for unwanted disturbance outside my room.

He could yell for every game he lost. Or he would intentionally made noises with his steps along the corridor of our room, trying to steal my focus.

I knew that for sure, yet he always succeed. Every. Single. Time.

In a blink of an eye, I'd step out and shouted at him while he ran away and chuckled. If my mood already ruined during the day, I'd catch him in the living room and punched his back as if it was me againsts a thief. Well ... he is a thief. He stole my mindfullness.

One thing I noticed is that he never fight back. Not at once. As if he let me crushed him with my wild fists and fingers. Usually when my attacks are getting weaker, he either squeeze my tiny body in his arms or he would run away. Again.

That day he chose to run, reaching for refrigerator and took two paper cups from the freezer. When I finally catched his step, he handed me a chocolate ice cream, my favorite flavor he knows very well. As I tried to reach the cup, he decided to not giving it to me as it is. Then he opened the lid and put the spoon inside so that I could just eat it right away.

My God, it taste as awesome as I remember it would be. It was so good that I wheezed. He chuckled as he rub his fingers through my hair.

"What is it this time?" I asked while he shook his head and said, "Nothing."

"Nothing is free in this world, Dude. So, what is this ice cream do today? A special request to shut me up? Or another session of asking for second opinion?" I added. He still shook his head and smiled.

"Another session? Hahaha, no. You were busy anyway. Just finish your task. I just wanted you to have a little break from whatever shit you're currently working on," he said. I sighed as he was not being infuriating like he always does.

"You're joking, right?"

"Do I look funny right now?"

"Oh ... yes, you do! I've lived with you my whole life to know how silly you are. I have no idea how could someone like you be a school-star everybody adores, like ... no shit, they have no idea who you truly are—"

"I have a girlfriend," he cut my word with sharp look. He gulped before he avoid eye contact.

"Yeah, so? None of my business, you know— wait ... did you ... do something nasty with that girl?" Judging by how serious he looked at that time, I could not help but think of something bad. Yet he did not answered my question and I tried to make him look at me in the eye. But he refused to do so.

"Jaehyun!"

"I was drunk! I didn't know what I was doing!" he shouted back. My jaw dropped, thinking of what kind of disaster he just told me about.

"You're so screwed, Bro!"

"Help me!"

"Hell no!"

"But I gave you an ice cream!"

"An ice cream? In exchange for what? A possibility of you ... ruining our family in instant? Now tell me, did you made her pregnant?" I asked, holding his shoulders with both of my hands.

His face suddenly went red and he bit his lips. He neither confirm nor deny my curiousity which made me lowkey furious.

"Hey!"

"I don't know! But we had great time, I suppose. She said it was good—"

"Yacks! Why are you telling me this?!" I punched his chest and he whined. But then he laughed out loud. He probably dive in too deep that he started to shed tears.

"What's so funny about it?" I asked, with rage shown on my face. He scooped a spoon of his ice cream and tried to feed me. He opened his mouth as a sign for me to open mine, and I really did. I looked like I was his robot obeying his order. Not long after, that spoon of chocolate ice cream instantly melt inside my mouth.

"It's funny because I lied," he stated after a long silence.

All of sudden, I have no energy left to throw another tantrum. I was just starring sharp as his face turned goofy.

"You're a good sister, you know that? I bet nobody would spare her time in between her deadlines just to listen my outstanding story like you did—"

"You just wasted my time! Holyshit!" I finally cursed as I stood up. He let me walk away and I could feel him starring at me with a wide smile as he succeed his prank. So I turned and raised my middle finger on him.

"I love you too," he said. I cringed so hard as he blew a kiss with both of his hands. Who the fuck he think he is? A superstar whose action melt everyone heart? Maybe. But not to me, at least.

When I walked pass the corridor, I could hear him jumping on the sofa. I guess he celebrated that moment, literally. I stood before the door and placed my forehead on the wall, then sighed.

I sat back on the chair, trying to get my mind back on the task. But his chuckling voice from the living room bothered me so much that I reached my pillow and walked towards him.

"You, son of a bitch!" I shouted as I attacked him with the pillow. He used his hands to cover himself from me and that was all he did. No counter attack. No fight back. Just joyful laugh.

"You said you know me well before, but you still got pranked," he said followed with a loud cheerful laugh right after.

"I said I know ... how silly you are ... I didn't expect ... you'd joke about ... doing ... that ... with your ... girlfriend," I replied while I was out of breath. I kept hitting my brother with the pillow and he kept laughing as he laid himself on the sofa.

I locked his waist with my legs so he could not move even a single inch away from me. Yet I still did not hear a single protest from him. As expected, he still enjoys being brutally attacked by his sister.

"But deep down, you know I will do that one day," he spoke with his soft tone, contrast with the current sitation of our warzone. That voice made me stop attacking him immediately.

"Of course! You're a grown up ass man," I replied. He took that opportunity to free himself and sat down right in front of me.

"And what do you feel if that day come?" he asked followed with a warm smile painted on his face.

"Huh?" I raised an eyebrow.

"I mean, the day I finally live with somebody else and build my own family away from mom, dad, and you," he added.

"I guess I have no choice. I'm not sure with how I feel, honestly. Well, how about you? What if that day come to me?" I asked him back.

"I— uh ... probably will keep an eye on the guy you marry just in case he did something shitty. Then I'll come right away if I notice a single scratch on you, physically or mentally Then I'll throw that guy away from you. I swear to God that's what I'll do." He raised his fist up as if he was demonstrating a protest.

"Ha!" I covered my mouth right before I chuckled.

"Let me tell you something," he said, opening a new topic for our conversation.

"Don't you dare prank me this time!" I threatened him. He immediately shook his head and said, "No no no, this one is real."

He gave a sign with his hand to make me come closer to him. As usual, I obeyed his request. Then he placed his mouth close to my ear and whispered, "I was the one who ask for a younger sibling because I saw two kids on the playground fighting over who was going to held their dog's chain."

As soon as I heard that, I reached his wrist and took a quick glance before he continue his story.

"But I specifically ask for a brother. Yet I got a sister," he added. We both chuckled.

"Were you disappointed when I was born?"

"Not going to lie, I had a huge disappointment the moment it was revealed that you will be a girl. That was before you were born, I even told our mom to exchange the baby or do anything just so I could get a brother," his whisper tone got excited. I bursted in laugh.

"But then one day, our mom got sick and has to go to hospital at night. Our dad took her and left us at home, just like this. You were four and I was seven. I was so stressed, not knowing what to do with you, and us literally just stuck together like that," he added.

"I was preparing myself to say no to whatever you want because you use to ask this and that, then cry when you didn't get what you want." I chuckled remembering how bad I behave when I was younger.

"But then you just came to me, in my room, and with a soft-spoken voice, you ask if I want to eat ice cream with you," he said then took a deep breath before he continued, "I told you we have no ice cream and you said that we should ride a bike to the nearest minimarket to buy some—"

"And we did," I cut him immediately since I remember which story he tried to tell.

"Yes ... we did," he echoed my words and smile widely as I looked at him.

"That's the moment when I finally realized ... having a sister is not so bad. I'm way more relaxed at that day and I guess that was the first time you behave nicely," he said while putting his index on my nose. I could not help but to smile. His words comforted me in a way I never expected.

The task I tried to finish before actually made me questioned myself. I guess I was too tired to live my day because of how stressful it was to be at school everyday and stuck with numerous task from various subjects.

"I heard you sob this afternoon, by the way," he suddenly confessed, made me raised both of my eyebrows in instant.

"You did?"

"Yeah, and it breaks my heart to hear—"

"I thought you were busy playing games," I cut him again. His sentimental side was showing and I almost cringed had I not stop him talking midway.

"I did. But I walked passed your room couple times and even peek inside—"

"But I hear nothing?!" I raised my voice as I speak. He shook his head slowly and added, "I also called your name, but you didn't answer. That's when I went out to buy the ice cream."

"Gosh ...." I took a deep breath before I finally smiled.

"You know ... I'm not a smart brother you can rely on when you're stuck with your tasks. So the only thing I can do to help is to give you a quick ice cream break," he said as he lifted his jaw haughtily.

"And pranked me, for God's sake," I added. We both laughed so hard right after.

"That's for a signature touch," he replied. I raised my eyebrow once again and he continued, "I won't let you forget my existence ever. So I'll plant as many silly memories as I can—"

"Oh, fuck that shit." I reached my pillow and threw it towards my brother and left him immediately.

Eventually, I was able to finish my deadlines at midnight. Although the idea of what my silly brother did haunted me the whole time.

#jaehyun #fanfic #imagine #brother #nct #nct jaehyun #what if #writing #buddie fic #fic #short ficlet #siblings au #nct au #jaehyun au #oneshot #slice of life

[mariatesstruther]

Tbf as much as I don’t trust TV writers, I have no doubt Maria will be fine. Part of Tommy’s storyline is that he actively chooses to leave her when he goes on his revenge quest and when he returns a broken man, the one thing he has left is his marriage, and he ruins that too and without that, and that pain will only be doubled with a 4 year old kid as well.

It also makes the contrast to Ellie leaving Dina and JJ more poignant, and maybe even backs up Tommy’s decision to go to the farm more as in ‘I left my wife and kid for you, you can leave yours for me’.

So even though it would set Tommy down a darker path, I actually think it’s pivotal Maria is alive for the revenge quest because of that choice to leave, which is easier if she’s not there and I think a lot of Part 2 is about choices and if the costs are worth it and if his family are dead, Tommy doesn’t really have any ‘costs’ left but if they are, his choices can actively haunt him since they’re alive but he’s still lost them

these are very awesome and legit points!!!! i think its been a while since i last watched a tlou2 playthrough as well so thank you for the reminder of how his game/season 2 story kinda reflects ellie’s in those ways

i think part of the reason im just major major offput about them adding a pregnancy for maria in s2 in it just makes things so much more sad and stressful for maria????? like her whole life has just been loving people and then getting left behind. imagine finding a husband you love and having a child with him and then losing them BOTH to a goddamn zombie apocalypse. id already be devastated. joel lost his child and it completely ruined him; maria lost a child and their father, who as far as we know she had a happy life with. fucking brutal

but THEN she picks herself up, dusts herself off, and finds the strength to keep going. builds a place that she would’ve been maybe happy with raising kevin in, if she could, and she opens her heart up to tommy. she falls in love, and theyre happy, and now shes pregnant. shes having another baby that she gets to raise and lose with a husband she adores

THEN HIS BROTHER GETS MURDERED AND NOW HES JUST GONNA LEAVE HER THERE????? WITH A WHOLE ASS TINY CHILD??????? for REVENGE??????

like im sorry, i love me some good ol revenge as much as the next guy—i really do. the glory was my favorite show, and the first time i watched a tlou 2 full play through i was rooting for tommy and ellie to honestly take out EVERYBODY in joel’s name—and i also know firsthand what kind of distorted thinking tommy’s level of grief can cause. but i just HATE the idea that tommy would leave a CHILD to go after anyone, even the people that killed his brother. and i think if joel saw him do so, he literally would smack him upside the head and drag him back to jackson

it also just doesnt fit what i imagine tommy would do in the instance that he has a kid???? like this is the same tommy that watched joel devote his whole entire life to his own daughter from jump, who wouldve done anything he could to protect his first daughter and DID do everything he could to protect his second. tommy knows from joel that when you’re a father, you’re kid comes fucking first. fuck everything else

so i just can’t imagine tommy leaving both maria AND his child???? like tbh i could understand him leaving maria in the game, as much as i didn’t like it—but his own baby???? he knows joel wouldnt ever want him to do that, no matter what happens to him. to me it just wouldn’t make sense for tommy’s grief over joel to take him so far that he makes a choice he knows joel would hate

(and i know ellie made the choice to leave jesse and dina, but i think a big reason she did that was bc she had the additional guilt of having jesse on her conscience and knowing that tommy wouldn’t physically be able to do it after being shot. tommy’s circumstances for leaving his kid would be different)

so like for those reasons on tommy’s side, it doesn’t make much sense to me that he would go after joel unless his own child was out of the picture, and i don’t see his child being out of the picture unless maria i also out of the picture

NOT SAYING ID RATHER MARIA BE DEAD THAN PREGNANT BTW I WANT HER TO BE ALIVE AND HAPPY AND SAFE. i am just so confused about the hbo writer’s intentions with making her pregnant like!!!!!! feels very sus to me!!!!!!

especially bc of the track record for the way nonwhite tlou characters are brutalized in the game/show too. like @clickergossip ur tags on the reblog were so so so so so so so SO right on point. them making maria a PREGNANT black woman just makes me so nervous that something terrible will happen, esp considering what we’ve seen happen to the other Black characters in the game/show

and i totally understand brutality and gore and death is all part of tlou anyway, but i feel like with joel and ellie, the violence is almost always balanced out witth a degree of love/humor/lightheartedness. unfortunately rutina wesley’s maria hasn’t had much opportunity at all to partake in those lighter moments, which makes me think either the writers have a LOT of good stuff coming up for her or that they think she’s expendable. idk idk idk idk this does even have a point, im just rambling and thinking about it a lot aand very on edge as a maria-truther 😭😭😭 as much as i want to have confidence, i have many many doubts she will be fine

#i refuse to talk about the possibility that they lose that kid #nope nope nope #not possible just choosing actively to not think abt that ever #asked and answered #tysm whoever u are for trying to reassure me im so sorry that this was my response 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 #i am made of anxiey #tlou #tlou hbo #tlou hbo spoilers #tlou 2 #tlou season 2 #maria miller #rose tag

[tsuki-sennin]

Desire Grand Prix was brought to you by Niram-P and the following sponsors.

-Blue Fox Instant Udon

-Pink Buffalo Jelly Beans

-Kurama Foundation

And contributions from viewers like you... thank you~!

Laser Raiser. Lazy Laser. Raiser Laser.

I can't get over the new device's name, Goddamn.

Anyways yeah, Episodes 22 and 23! I'll be watching those today.

Spoilers, I guess...

-Well now, Keiwa. If it wasn't Sae-san, then it would be you. If I was you, I'd be keeping a close eye on Neon-chan.

-"Are you ready, Keiwa-kun?"

-Wonder how you're looking in the polls?

-"Go sabotage."

-Forevermore.

-Goddamn, that's stake raising.

-Desaster Arc is almost over, bitches~!

-Buffa's in the game! Forgot to tell you guys that, but you'll be fine, right?

-Chirami, I don't wanna know how you made that squishy sound.

-"Christ, are you really selling my life as some stupid bad boy character? Is there someone I can sue? Can I call that green buffalo Rider from another Rider death game?"

-"You can win big~! Or go home ten thousand lives shorter~!"

-You're one sick son of a bitch, Chirami.

-Naptime.

-Jamatoless behavior.

-"World peace, finally :D"

-"Nooo... we're losing viewership by the Jamillion!"

-Sup Archie?

-"Don't rush me, bitch boy!"

-"Ohhhh noooooo, that sounds like not my problem!"

-Ohhhhhhh

-Daichi's the cause of the game.

-Where Jamato?

-Game Master's turn!

-GLARE2!

-Login!

-Hen! Sin!

-I HAVE FULL CONTROL OVER

-GLARE2!

-Time to fight!

-Tsumuri, what're you doin'?

-Go!

-Hide and seek~!

-That's a neat idea.

-"Good luck, everyone~! Keep the viewers and the sponsors happy~!"

-Oh?

"Right, I'm gonna clock out early, Chirami ain't paying me enough for this."

-LANDMINE!

-Guys who go "AAAAAAAAH" and girls who go "Nyeaaaaaaaah!"

-This is so funny to me.

-Sabotage!

-And now he's in the cage.

-Wherein he belongs.

-Draw on the man's face.

-"Wow man, the audience hates you."

-"Please stop reminding me."

-And with that, you've convinced literally nobody.

-"Sorryyyyy..."

-Can't exactly lie to what's essentially a professional con man.

-Guess nobody in this restaurant really cares?

-You're not exactly being discrete yourself, Neon!

-Guessing that guy's Na-Go's sponsor.

-Ah yep, there he is.

-Everybody's got eyes on Neon Kurama. Not always for good reasons.

-You're kinda creepy, dude.

-Here comes the fanboy. Ziin~!

-I don't really like that name all that much, but I guess I can't really change that, can I?

-Guess Beroba's got a good idea. Crush all Riders, let the Jamato run unopposed, make all of humanity suffer. Everybody wins with that arrangement, it'd seem.

-Anyways, welcome back to the silly!

-Worm~!

-He runnin'!

-Ooooooh, pressure plates.

-Bonk!

-This is neat to me, I don't know why.

-It's a similar suit and power set, but it's like a polar opposite fighting style to Girori's.

-Can't jump.

-Oh we're losin'.

-"You're too soft, Tycoon. Your bleeding heart might just be hemorrhaging at this point."

-Neon-chan!

-Ohhhhh, girl's playing dirty.

-Hey, hey, hey!

-There they be.

-Ohhhhh, Beroba's a rider too.

-...did she get giant?

-The seeds of distrust have been sown.

-"How impressive... I suppose having a housecat hunt as she please would eventually turn her feral."

-Think you're laying it on a little thick there, honey.

-The Dezastar... it's you, Neon-chan.

-Ace is just that goddamn good.

-Damn.

-Nevermind that, the Game Master's been kicked.

-Game Master Beroba.

-Goddess of Creation.

-...I get it now.

-Haxxored.

-There he is.

-Ziin.

-"You're ruining my quality TV time, Beroba. I'll stomp you into the dirt."

-Laser Raise Riser!

-Ziin Set!

-Laser On!

-That's a cool goddamn jingle.

-Ziin! His actor, Fuku Suzuki, he played Shotaro Ishinomori himself in Super Hero Senki. He's pretty good for a guy so young.

-Now he gets to be a Kamen Rider.

-These two random teenagers, a frog man mafia boss, and whoever that sweater dude is. Our sponsors, ladies and germs.

-"I want to be moved."

-Guess even Chirami's fully aware that Beroba's bad news now.

-"Kamen Rider...!"

-Nadgey, what did you think you were gonna do?

-Guy's got lasers.

-She wins this round, but it definitely ain't over.

-"I'm afraid I can't let you do that, Beroba-kun."

-Niram-P, hello.

-Game Master. Producer.

-"Bleeeeeh!"

-She just noped the fuck out of there.

-Soooooo, Goddess... where'd you come from?

-Well, we're fucked.

-You get a second to breathe, Neon.

-Sousei no Megami!

-Ohhh!

-Secretary Jumpscare.

-"You got hacked and hijacked, you goddamn moron. I'll deal with you later."

-The Goddess is the DGP.

-Guess you're all angels.

-"No comment."

-"Soooo... wanna tell us why you know where the Jamato come from?"

-Man... Michinaga's getting a lot angrier by the second.

-You're a darkhearted man, Mr. Producer.

-I guess Chirami's really not liked by the upper management.

-Unfullfilled forever more.

-"Pwease get my Driver back, pweeeeease~!"

-For the sake of Real Fiction.

-"I'm going to use you to grant my wish."

-Hello, Kekera!

-"Get the Driver back, boy!"

-Woooow, free Boost once more!

-Be sure to use it this time.

-"Kamen Rider!" That's you!

-An entire goddamn flower garden.

-Ohhhhhhh

-He's a simp.

-Kyuun.

-Free buckle~!

-Lots of people root for Na-Go-san.

-Tsumuri's so DONE with these people's shit.

-Ziin, hello.

-"You're my dude."

-Oooooooh, he's jumpin' right in.

-I can't imagine how elated Suzuki-san is to be here.

-Jajajajajaja.

-Jajaja?

-Ja?

-"Duuuuude, I'm fighting with Geats!"

-Ziin Setto!

-He does the snape!

-Set Fever!

-Double Beat!

-...Back Beat?

-I see Ziin plays support.

-I have to admit, this is really cool.

-"Your destined enemy. He's here."

-Buffa just wants the game to end for good.

-OOooooooh, Jamato Zombie!

-That's siiiiick.

-Revolve On!

-Radical.

-Good job, Neon!

-We are... Kamen Riders!

-Ohhhhhh

-Nadgey's back.

-Man, they're really going at it.

-Beroba, hello!

-Never make that noise around me again.

-"World's over anyway, nerd!"

-Ohhh, he's down.

-The Desire Grand Prix is a game lightyears ahead of the curb.

-Geats from the ancient past... Ziin from the far future.

-3.5D!

-"Oh well... DGP's reaching the finale. Oh well..."

-Ohhh, Tsumuri...

-OHHHHH

-Kamen Rider Beroba.

-IS FUCKING MASSIVE WHAT THE FUCK

-Breaking Mammoth sized!

-"NOOOOOOOOOOO MY BABIES!"

-Oh...

-Oh... this is over.

-OH SHIT KEKERA REVEAL

-Goddamn

-Geats has me hooked.

#kamen rider geats #geats spoilers #kr geats #kamen rider #the world's next round: trick shot of desire for the grand victory

[memetaped]

most popular girls in school taken from the tv show.

i said where, not when, you idiot.

what, did you suddenly adopt the vocabulary of bob the builder?

i’m sorry, doc, but i don’t live in a goddamn mentos commercial.

do you guys ever talk about anything other than, like, revenge?

we should probably go eat an entire meal and reorganize.

i’m coping. i’m celebrating. i’m copebrating. i’m celebroting.

oh my g.

we’re kind of in the middle of something right now, so if you could, you know, not.

god, i want to fucking murder you.

oh, you are a calm breeze in my fuckstorm of a life that i’m living.

are you gonna try to nickname yourself again?

note to self: corn dogs and mountain dew do not mix.

you look like a tampon that was dipped in skittles and vomit.

psst. psst. psst.

i want to poop here. whenever i want for as long as i want.

welcome to the new reality.

stop trying to force your full house references on us.

byeeeee.

but the “me” i want to be likes to curse.

i don’t really think that this is the kind of thing that anybody should be laughing at.

you were supposed to be watching the door.

someone threw a rock at me today.

why do you say “how do you say” before words you clearly know how to say?

om, nom, nom, nom. i’m hungry for lunch.

TMI but thanks.

whoa, i think i’m going to pass out.

well, well, well, sounds like there’s discord on cheer mountain.

i’m recording it on the DVR so that i can fast forward through commercials.

i didn’t believe that for a goddamn second.

you have the worst timing ever. we’re kind of dealing with a situation here.

jesus christ, is that a fucking gremlin?

i’m not saying anything. i’m just saying.

the answer to a question i never asked.

now where the hell is my nonfat skinny caramel hazelnut jamocha cappuccino?

the ghost of christmas past wouldn’t sell me anything.

it means whatever the fuck you want it to mean.

by a nap, do you mean ambien and a box of wine?

you cursed me out in the bathroom earlier today.

i think i know how to mix ex-lax into a fucking drink, okay?

well, i don’t want to be rude, but that story was very long and much more involved than i originally thought it would be, and i’ve had to poop through most of it.

just give me one second. annnd it’s on twitter.

i’m sorry, but why the fuck is everybody yelling over here?

no, write-in, like with a pen.

don’t erase my DVR.

so much technical jargon, jesus louisus!

that’s a nightmare. a nightmare i call my life.

and it can’t be me because i’m halfway through shark week.

what the fuck is wrong with you?! throwing hacky-sacks all around willy-nilly like this was the goddamned x-games.

don’t worry. i’ve got this.

oh, jesus christ, you’re a fucking trainwreck.

my ears will never be clean.

i’m trying to keep my stress levels down. i’ll explain later, but just know that i agree with pretty much everything you said.

i guess the only part of your plan that didn’t work was the whole goddamn thing!

don’t ever fucking cut me off again, do you understand me?

but if you put too much, then it won’t mix with the liquid and it’ll just sit on top like semen on root beer.

and that’s why i always say, “trust a decepticon and you’ll get burned”.

you think you can maintain consciousness for the next five minutes?

“not the best idea”? it’s a fucking ridiculous piece of shit of an idea!

i know you got your own issues, but we’ve literally spent the last three weeks talking exclusively about that.

hit the bricks, bitch.

we’ll make you an admin on our facebook page, include you on the google docs and start cc’ing you on all emails.

oh my god, i feel like it’s staring right at me. it’s like the eye of sauron.

never mind. posted, tagged, your life is ruined.

i wanted to play angry birds, not read wuthering fucking heights.

oh my, somebody’s gonna be walking very funny tomorrow morning.

is chiffon a material or a person? or both?

i’m in the matrix.

oh, well that sounds like a perfectly rational decision.

son of a – son of a gun, son of a freaking gun.

i’m glad this is gonna be a fair fight. like rocky and apollo creed.

i think you meant to say fudging poop-show.

do you think anyone will notice i’m bald?

you’re right. because a fly is an innocent creature that never knowingly did anything to anybody. you, however, i would maim.

how about i come back there and kick your ass?

if i didn’t have splash mountain coming out of my ass, i swear i’d rip your fucking head off.

you look up “bitch” in the dictionary and you’re gonna see my fucking face!

i just threw up in my mouth. please stop talking to me, and walk away.

you want me to say no, right?

because i’ve seen every single robocop, and i know how to take you out.

the only true happiness comes in death.

but in exchange for that, you have to watch a whole episode of glee with me.

it was barely a joke. it was just an insult with no laugh line.

i’m here to tell you two things. you’re famous and you’re welcome.

wait, why did you just answer a question that you just asked?

i ate the last bag of gushers while you were taking your afternoon bath, you dirt ball.

ew, it has a bloodstain on it.

that just made me think of something to put on my vision board! i’ll be right back.

this is pizza street, not a toddler’s kitchen.

i’m sorry, but someone like you wouldn’t really understand what i’m going through right now.

what the fuck is the wi-fi password?

i had to leave. i had to reinvent myself.

you have my full and complete attention.

wait, so is hipster a technical term for people who get dressed in the dark?

less talk, talk. more make, make.

what the fuck do i have to be stressed about? 

#tv tag. #rp meme #rp sentence meme #askbox meme

[fruitcoops]

I was watching this video w Megan Rapinoe & Sue Bird (tumblr won’t let me link but it’s from 2 days ago on GQ- they ask each other questions but it’s like quiz style?) and didn’t know if you would want to do something similar for coops? Some of the stuff they said/how they acted reminded me of coops’ dynamic

Anon, this video was the perfect way to spend an evening. Both these women are my role models and they’re unbelievably cute together--go check out the video here if you have the chance! Their dynamic is a lot like how I imagine Coops, too! Sweater Weather credit goes to @lumosinlove!

“Hey, Lions, we’re back!” Sirius waved at the camera and tapped a short stack on notecards on his thighs. “I’m Captain Sirius Black of the Gryffindor Lions and I’m here with my fiancé, Remus Lupin, to do another couple game.”

“The response to our last few interviews was incredible and we had a great time,” Remus continued. “Miss Marlene McKinnon was kind enough to drag us back in here to answer even more questions!”

“Do you want to go first?”

“Sure.” Remus cleared his throat and pulled the first card. “What are my parents’ first names?”

“Hope and Lyall.”

“Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. What’s my hidden talent?”

“You can sing.”

“Does that count? I feel like most people know that now.”

“Hmm.” Sirius thought for a moment, drumming his fingers on his knees. “You can cook really well.”

“Thank you, baby. What’s my favorite accessory?”

Sirius brightened. “Your watch!”

“Yes!” Remus held it up to the camera—it was simple and elegant, with a leather band and a small face. He wore it with the clock against the inside of his wrist, just above his pulse point. “What is my dream travel destination or vacation?”

“Oh, that’s tough.” Sirius bit his lip in thought. “Seattle? Paris?”

“I do want to go to Seattle, but I’ve always wanted to go to Montreal,” Remus said. “You’ve seen my hometown, but I’ve never been to yours.”

Sirius frowned. “Really?”

“Really. What am I most afraid of?”

“I think…I think you’re most afraid of not being useful,” Sirius said after a moment. “For six years, your job was all about helping people, and it’s not now.”

Remus raised his eyebrows at the camera. “I was going to say the dentist’s office. Goddamn.”

“Sorry,” Sirius laughed. “Yeah, you don’t like medical facilities.”

“I mean, you weren’t wrong about the useful thing,” Remus said. “You still get a point for that. What’s my favorite music, song, or artist to listen to before a game?”

“You don’t have one.”

“That was quick. Half a bonus point for speed. When was our first date and what did we do?”

“Our first official date was just after All-Stars and we went to Sid’s, but we had been together for about three months at that point and just hung out at each other’s houses.”

Remus grinned. “Do you remember what day it was?”

“January 28th.” Sirius gave him a look. “I know for a fact you don’t know what day it was.”

“January 28th.”

“You only know that because I just said it!” Sirius smacked him playfully with his cards. “Next question.”

“What’s my favorite movie and TV show?”

“Jurassic Park and Avatar: The Last Airbender.”

He whistled the first part of the theme song as Sirius did the hand motions. “What’s my shoe size?”

“Oh, god,” Sirius muttered, staring down at the floor. “Eleven? Eleven and a half? You have smaller feet than I do, but not by much.”

“I’m a size ten.”

“Are you really?”

Remus pulled one sneaker off and handed it to him with a laugh. “Check for yourself. Oh, I’d love to know the answer to this one. How do you know when I’m mad at you?”

Sirius tossed his shoe back with a snort. “You make faces.”

Remus seemed surprised. “Do I?”

“Yeah. You’ve got a very expressive face and the second you’re pissed, it’s written all over it. It’s like—” Sirius pursed his lips and scrunched his nose slightly. “I can’t really do it, but anytime I see that I’m like, ‘oh, shit, what did I do?’ Also, you stop calling me baby.”

“That’s what I was going to say. What’s my favorite city to play in?”

“Not Florida.”

“Not fucking Florida,” Remus agreed with a grin.

“Gryffindor for sure.”

“Where was I born?” He gave Sirius a teasing look. “Do you know this time, or should I get my mom on the line?”

Sirius stuck his tongue out. “Madison, Wisconsin.”

Remus glanced at the camera. “We got asked this question in an interview a few months ago and he had to call my mom afterward because he forgot.”

“She made fun of me the whole time,” Sirius pouted.

“What is my favorite food? Oh, you’ll get this one for sure.” Sirius hesitated and Remus’ eyes widened. “Really?”

“I’m a little torn. It’s either my grilled cheese or your dad’s turkey-cranberry thing. Actually, I don’t think you know what your favorite food is.”

Remus nodded slowly. “That’s a really good point. My first thought was grilled cheese, but my dad makes the best postgame sandwiches. I’ll give you that. What’s my favorite hobby?”

“Reading.”

“What did I want to be when I was a kid?”

“A librarian, until you started playing hockey.”

Remus leaned over and high-fived him. “You’re on a roll, baby. What was my jersey number in college?”

“Number six.”

“The transition was so fucking easy,” Remus laughed. “Coach literally came up to me a month before practices started and went ‘hey, what was your old number?’ and I told him, and he looked down at his clipboard and went, ‘cool.’. I got my jersey two weeks later.”

“Is this your last question?”

“It is, indeed. What’s my full birth name?”

“Remus Jehosephat Lupin.”

“That is incorrect.”

“Close enough. It’s Remus John Lupin, which I find endlessly funny.”

“Why is it funny?” Marlene asked off-screen. Remus hid his face behind his notecards as Sirius laughed.

“Because it’s such a basic middle name! I love Hope and Lyall with my entire heart and they’re wonderful people, but they named their sons Remus and Julian and then I think they got stuck. Like, you’ve got these two very uncommon first names and they sort of went ‘fuck it. John and Michael. We’re done.’ It’s just so funny.”

“Whereas your parents went the extra mile and gave you and Reg goddamn supervillain names,” Remus snorted. “The drama of it all, my god.”

“Alright, alright, my turn.” Sirius leaned his elbows on his knees. “What is my favorite color?”

“Blue.”

“How do I like my coffee?”

Remus hissed between his teeth. “Ah, shit, you always make the coffee. With a lot of sugar, right? It’s black with sugar?”

“It can’t be black if it has sugar in it,” Sirius laughed. “But yes, I do put sugar in my coffee. What are three things I never leave the house without?”

“Keys, wallet, phone.”

“My favorite TV show?”

“Why are you going through these so fast? Uh, Avatar.”

“Did I ever have a job that wasn’t playing hockey?”

“Nope.” Remus frowned. “Were you allowed to get a job as a kid?”

“I was not. What’s my favorite ice cream flavor?”

“Cookies and cream.”

Sirius made a buzzer noise. “Incorrect.”

“Is it chocolate?”

“Yep. You get half a point for that. What’s the first meal I ever cooked for you?”

Remus gave him a look. “You don’t remember what you cooked for me, do you?”

“Refresh my memory?”

“No way!” He punched him lightly on the arm. “I’m not falling for my own tricks. Next question.”

“It’s kind of a repeat from earlier. How do you know when I’m mad at you?”

Remus fiddled with the edges of his cards. “You act all weird and Captain-y, and then you get quiet. Just cranky vibes all around.”

“Cranky vibes,” Sirius laughed. “Good to know. What are my favorite movie-watching snacks?”

“Popcorn and…Sweet Tarts?”

“Yes!” Sirius gave him a high-five. “Do you know what I like on my popcorn?”

“Butter and enough salt to kill a Victorian child.”

“Bonus point! What is—oh, shit!” He nearly fumbled the cards onto the floor. “What is my favorite movie of all time?”

“Indiana Jones.”

“Which one?”

“The one with Marian, because she reminds you of me.” Remus looked over at the camera. “I really don’t like snakes.”

“What is the first thing I do when I wake up in the morning?”

“Oh, I think this requires a demonstration. C’mere.”

“Does it really?” Sirius sighed as he laid down next to him.

“For sure.” Remus cuddled into his side and laid his head on his shoulder. “Alright, the key to a true Sirius Black wake-up is getting all four limbs wrapped around the other person like you’re trying to suffocate them with affection.”

“Okay—”

“And then,” Remus continued with a grin. “I go, ‘honey, wake up’—”

“You absolutely do not.”

“In my head, that’s what I say. It’s very sweet. To answer the question, the first thing Sirius does is this.” He buried his face in Sirius’ chest and groaned loudly, then dissolved into snickering as Sirius’ chest began to shake with suppressed laughter. “Stop it, you’re ruining the demonstration!”

“You forgot the part where I have to peel you off me with pliers and grease,” Sirius teased as they stood up, dusting themselves off. The camera crew applauded and they both bowed. “Alright, where were we? What am I most scared of?”

“Losing your friends and family,” Remus said. “Also, spiders and most bugs.”

“You forgot one.”

“Which one? The dish soap bubbles?”

“Losing you.”

A vibrant blush tinted Remus’ cheeks and ears, and he floundered for words. “Oh.”

“You still get the points, though,” Sirius said mildly. “What city do I like playing in the most?”

Remus paused for a moment longer, then shook his head to clear his thoughts. “Uh, Gryffindor. You like the crowd.”

“I do.” Sirius smiled at the camera. “To all the fans out there: you are incredible and there is nothing like skating out with everybody roaring so loud the windows shake. Who is my biggest hockey influence?”

“Now, or when you were younger?”

“Now.”

“It’s Dumo, right?”

Sirius nodded. “On and off the ice. What’s my proudest career moment?”

“Hmm, I wonder,” Remus said sarcastically. “Could it possibly be winning the Stanley Cup?”

“Just maybe,” Sirius laughed. “What’s my most famous celly, and which one’s my favorite?”

Remus grinned. “Lightning McQueen.”

“I hate it when you call it that.” Despite his words, Sirius was smiling. “It’s supposed to be cool!”

“Can you elaborate?” Marlene asked.

“I mean, most people who have seen him play know what I’m talking about,” Remus said, gesturing to the camera. “But Sirius’ famous celly is a double fist pump, and I call it the Lightning McQueen because it’s like ka-chow! It’s also his favorite one, though he dances when we’re skating alone or with a couple of the guys.”

“Shhh, they aren’t supposed to know that!” Sirius covered Remus’ mouth with his notecard. “This is the very last one. What is my biggest pet peeve?”

“When I leave my socks laying around the house.”

“Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner! That drives me fucking bonkers. Marley, who won?”

“It wasn’t a competition,” she said off-screen. “Just a Q & A.”

“Who got the most right?” Remus asked.

“You two are hopeless,” she muttered. There were a few beats of silence. “Remus won, with sixteen and a half out of seventeen. Sirius, you had fifteen and a half.”

“No.” Sirius groaned and dropped his head into his hands as Remus whooped.

“Hell yes!”

“My bonus points let you win.” He shook his head in disbelief. “I can’t believe this.”

Remus faced the camera with a victorious smile. “Thanks for joining us to witness my landslide victory—”

“It was one point.”

“And make sure to like and subscribe for more Lion Pride content! See you around, Lions.” They both mock-saluted, and the video ended.

[bastardcatthings]

No, you know what? it's not funny (Rant)

Watching "Mac and Dennis buy a timeshare" and "being Frank" back-to-back just insanely unsettles me in regards to Dennis (and the rest of the gang's) treatment of Mac. Like, it's no secret that the gang (and specially Dennis) have started treating Mac like shit for no absolute reason (cuz he’s annoying? please, you guys SAY that more than you actually show it to us. Mac is not any more annoying than he was before. If anything, he is less annoying now that the whole bossy thing/” gay people bad” phase of his has fizzled out...) but to actually see it play out within the span of 40 minutes is just too much. And they're not even that far apart! They're only 2 seasons apart; that's only 20 episodes! Like, not even a full season in comparison to longer sitcoms! And yet such a blatant 180° shift in the characterization and for what?! It's not even funny! Not even the fucking dudebros on reddit think that Mac being excessively submissive to Dennis and just overall pathetic is funny! Like how fucked up is the situation that not even redditors are trying to laugh at him cuz obviously a man being in love with his best friend is the funniest goddamn thing in the world (they said, sarcastically, trying to not go on a rant about people who actually act like Dennis is a successful womanizer or that mac was “ruined” by coming out or keep making bird jokes about Kaitlin and God I’m getting angry again)

Shipping be damned (since most times this problem get addressed, it's in regards to macdennis) this affects the platonic friendships (the whole group dynamic) in the show SO MUCH as well. Look, sunny is not a cuddly show, nor is it a feel good one in any(conventional) ways, but it always has had a heartwarming element in the relationships that the members of the gang have with each other. While not healthy or wholesome 99% of the times, there is something almost endearing about the games that Charlie and frank play at night times. about Dennis and Dee having similar quirks that remind you, yeah! they're twins! About Charlie and Dennis sharing one (1) single brain cell, dee and Dennis still referring to frank as their dad when he's not around, Mac and Dee being unhinged together, the boys giving the first bite of the steaks to Dee and toasting to her when she tied the waiters shoe laces. Something about Mac and Charlie throwing rocks at trains just like they used to do when they were kids and of course, the holy grail of relationships on sunny (and damn me for getting back to them because I wanted to talk about mac and Charlie, AND I WILL IN A MINUTE) Mac and Dennis. doing, well, anything. No matter what they did they were always on each other’s team. Recession? boom. everybody fired but us. Mortgage crisis? Boom. We're playing realtor husbands. Dee got scammed? well we won't be baby, let's go get ourselves a new set of golf clubs. No matter what happened in the show, they were by each other’s side- literally, these guys are constantly sitting/standing/walking next to each other- so much so that you don't even notice how weird it is that they get on so great. Hell, THEY don't even notice until Dee points it out to them in mac and Dennis breakup! On the gang misses the boat, Charlie and Dee themselves said the reason they never did anything that they wanted was because MAC AND DENNIS would judge them!!! They are the DEFINITION of a package deal. And look where we are now.... anyways also gotta talk about Charlie and mac, y'know, the guys who PRACTICALLY GREW UP TOGETHER?? Remember the time when Dennis was actually jealous that Charlie considered Mac his best friend? And he was so ADAMANT about it and only started to waver after he suspected Mac might be sleeping with the waitress? The guy who told Mac: those others guys didn't get us man but I feel like you just get me we just click (kinda paraphrasing but this was the gist) THAT GUY turned into this sarcastic a-hole that just dismissively says: He's fat, he's skinny, he's muscular, it’s really a cry for help and attention......REALLY?!?!?!?and it's not even that Charlie is actually an asshole in season 13, his character is pretty much the same expect towards Mac. Because the writers needed everyone to hate mac sooo much, they forgot their characters whole backstory and relationships. Nice. Real nice guys. Speaking of the writers needing everyone to hate mac,

WHY IS MAC FILLING THE ROLE THAT DEE ALREADY HAS?!?

See, I don't enjoy seeing Dee belittled or mocked by the guys, except that I do. Kaitlin Olson really struck gold with Dee's character. She brings this air of empty confidence and slight narcissism to Dee that makes it SO MUCH EASIER to hate her. Even if you don't hate her, at least Kaitlin gives you a performance that on the surface makes you believe that Dee really has better things to do and she's not really stuck with the guys ,so that makes you feel safe about the effect this may have on her feelings and you allow yourself to laugh unapologetically to every oldie but goldie bird joke that the boys throw at her, even tho if you actually sit down later and think about it , you realize that yeah she has nothing better to do and nowhere better to be and this is her only friend group and family! but by then you have already laughed at the episode and this is just you thinking about it on overtime so the writers don't care .They achieved the goal of making you exhale from your nose. But with rob McElhanney?? yeesh.... it's just blatantly sad. There is just the surface. There is no deeper layer. There is no overtime and most importantly, there is no laughter because Rob with those big brown puppy dog eyes of his looks so goddamn sad and broken that as a person who genuinely cares about these garbage people, you can't really bring yourself to laugh at him (also points to Kaitlin for being a woman which makes her easier to hate/laugh at her misfortune since media has desensitized the masses to the female characters getting ragged on all the time especially in comedies. yay misogyny!!) I still believe that THE saddest line in iasip was said by Mac on season 13 ep.1, which was "you guys like me, right?" ......... was this really supposed to be funny? I mean shit man, with Rob's face when he said that and the defeated tone he had while saying it.... it's like in the gang broke Dee, even the guys know that when you don't defend yourself, it's just not funny back and forth anymore, it's just sad (also with dee at least they tried to come up with fun insults and jabs, which is way friendlier imo than acting disgusted by mac all the time/not even acknowledging he exists)

This of course is not to say that Rob is not a talented actor, just that it's always been that way. Dee is the punching bag and mac is the bossy guy and even tho they are much more than that, you really shouldn't try to completely swap/break these character molds after a decade. It will just fail to land. And the funny thing is that sunny prides itself on the policy that these characters do not change and grow as time passes and you know what? They've for the most part upheld this little law of theirs. Frank and Charlie and dee only suffered minor flanderization throughout the show (I like to think that the fact they all seem more normal on the first few seasons is just the natural progression of these human beings, in-universe) all the while Dennis and mac make absolutely no sense in the roles they have assumed in the show as of right now (season 14). There was a time where Dennis WILLINGLY let Mac presume the role of the brains of the trio!! Now imagine season-14-the-head-cow's-always-grazing- Dennis agree to that. Can't, can you? And that's not a good sign and that's not in-world progression (or, well, regression I guess) either since it makes no sense how he got from point A to point B. Dee started from setting a girl on fire for stealing her look pre-season one and a decade later she got revenge on her stripper ex-boyfriend by booking him a gig at his daughter’s party. You can see how she got there but how did Dennis go from being deeply invested in an argument about being a power bottom in the middle of a scheme, to visibly scoffing at Mac's suggestion to bring the bit back … I'm at a loss.

And you know what bothers me the most? What prompted me to write this monster of a text out of spite? The fact that I just KNOW that rcg (and Megan or whoever else) don't have ANY plans to take this somewhere. As much as I want to believe it, this is not Mac "gently coaxing Dennis out of the closet through patience" (they've had many opportunities to hint at that and they just didn't, in fact they chose to go the opposite direction and show us Dennis legitimately hates this whole thing coughtimesupforthegangcough) or Mac "shedding his toxic masculinity and bossiness and being more relax and happy" he's NOT happy! In fact, we have been shown (more like seen repeatedly be used as a joke) that Mac is constantly upset with his current situation (*do you think Dennis hates me? * *You guys like me, right? *) and this is not Dennis being angry with mac that he pushed Dennis in the closet but now is out himself (as much as I ADORE ADORE ADORE this take on why he dislikes Mac so much after coming out, please never stop writing about this scenario)

Look *deeeep sigh* I'm tired and I've digressed so damn much from my original point. This was supposed to be a three paragraph long shit post but somehow 4 hours later, we're here because ultimately, I (for whatever reason) care about these horrible people and I genuinely want this show that I love so much, be the best it can be and yeah maybe I care too much about whether or not a misogynistic, gay,40 something year old, FICTIONAL guy who is obsessed with his best friend and has a sticky bible, gets made fun of by his equally loser friends but hey, that's the sunny way. Getting too pumped about shit that matters too little.

But of course, in the end

REASON WILL PREVAIL.

#you know what? #prove me wrong rcg #make me look like a cynical clown #I dare you to do it #I WANT you to do it #but you won't #I'm so fucking pissed I got a headache #fuck it I'm tired of being optimistic with this shit #but still hope that rcg actually dod this with a plan and it wasn't just for temporary change of the status quo #said the clown with it's clown makeup running down it's clownish face #how long is this? #this is the longest tvshow related thing I've ever written #so when I tell yall I'm PASSIONATE ABOUT MAC... #sigh #I'm gonna go sleep #iasip #it's always sunny in philadelphia #its always sunny in philadelphia #mac macdonald #dennis reynolds #charlie kelly #dee reynolds #frank reynolds #macdennis

[piratewithvigor]

My first thought in regard to every band that gets played on my radio station

ACDC: Every dad’s favourite band

Adams, Bryan: Every mom’s favourite singer until Michael Buble came along

Aerosmith: haha they thought Vince Neil was a lady

Alice Cooper: he’s a Game Of Thrones fanboy and I have proof

Alice In Chains: my sister doesn’t like them because she decided AC were Alice Cooper’s initials ONLY

Allman Brothers Band: good music for dropping acid to

Allman, Gregg: That’s too many Gs for one name

Animals: House Of The Rising Sun, or who even cares

Argent: Sometimes Hold Your Head Up is really catchy

Asia: Tuesdays

Autograph: one of the members went on to be a pharmacist

Bachman-Turner Overdrive: There are just so many pop culture jokes about Taking Care Of Business that whatever I say won’t be as funny

Bad Company: with their song; Bad Company, off their album; Bad Company

Benatar, Pat: Always getting her confused with Patti Smith

Black Crowes: I like them for Lickin, but it doesn’t seem to exist outside of one shoddy video on youtube and my old CD

Blackfoot: this band name feels kind of racy

Black Sabbath: Dio was not better or worse than Ozzy; just different

Blondie: I like Call Me, but Blondie confuses me stylistically

Blue Oyster Cult: MORE COWBELL

Bon Jovi: Hello, childhood trauma, I missed you

Boston: ONE GUY. ONE GUY DID IT ALL AND NO ONE KNOWS

Bowie, David: Don’t let your children watch The Man Who Fell To Earth, or David Bowie’s will end up being the third penis they see in life

Browne, Jackson: Another musician ruined by Supernatural

Buffalo Springfield: Jack Nicholson was at the riot they sing about

Burdon, Eric: no ideas, brain empty

Bush: ditto

Candlebox: ditto once more. Who are these people?

Cars: This band feels so gay and so straight at the same time, I can only assume they’re the poster children of bisexual panic

Cheap Trick: I played Dream Police on Guitar Hero so fucking much because it was the only song anyone who played with me could keep up with

Chicago: Chicago 30 exists, but they do not have 30 albums. Fucking riddle me that

Clapton, Eric: 6 discs in one Greatest Hits is too many. That’s called “re releasing your discography”

Cochrane, Tom: For some reason, everyone thinks Rascal Flats did it better

Cocker, Joe: Belushi did it right

Collective Soul: who?

Collins, Phil: If his biggest hits were done by MCR, they would be emo anthems, but because he’s 5′6″ and from the 80s, they’re not

Cream: *Vietnam flashbacks on the hippie side*

CCR: *Vietnam flashbacks on the war side*

CSNY: David Crosby; meh

Deep Purple: THEY’RE SO MUCH MORE THAN SMOKE ON THE WATER

Def Leppard: the only music for when you’re a heartbroken bitch but also a sexy one

Derek And The Dominos: Clapton and ‘Layla’ broke up

Derringer, Rick: Tom Petty if he was from the midwest

Dio: You thought it was an anime reference, but it was me, Dio

Dire Straits: You can tell how bigoted a radio station is based on how much of Money For Nothing they censor

Doobie Brothers: I have yet to smoke weed, but I listen to the Doobies, and I think that’s pretty close

Dylan, Bob: I take back everything I said about him in my youth

Eagles: Hotel California isn’t their best song, but the memes that come from it are second to none

Edgar Winter Group: @the--blackdahlia

Electric Light Orchestra: Actually an orchestra and sound a fuckton like George Harrison

ELO: I really hesitate to ask what happens with the 7 virgins and a mule

Essex, David: no prominent memories of him

Fabulous Thunderbirds: cannot spell

Faces: Who on earth thought that was a good album name?

Faith No More: I got nothing

Fixx: One Thing Leads To Another is a damn bop

Fleetwood Mac: I ain’t straight, but I’m simply not enough of a witch to enjoy them to full potential

Fogerty, John: He got sued cause he sounded like himself

Foghat: Slow Ride slowly becoming less coherent feels like a drug trip

Foo Fighters: He was just excited to buy a grill

Ford, Lita: deserved better

Foreigner: dramatically overplayed

Frampton, Peter: a masterful user of the talk box

Free: dramatically underplayed

Gabriel, Peter: leaving Genesis changed him a lot

Genesis: if someone likes Genesis, clarify the era, because yes, it does matter

Georgia Satellites: sing like you have a cactus in your ass

Golden Earring: Twilight Zone slaps, but it doesn’t slap as hard as this station thinks it does

Grand Funk Railroad: Funk

Grateful Dead: I like their aesthetic more than their music

Great White: there are so many fucking shark jokes

Greenbaum, Norman: makes me think of Subway for some reason

Green Day: the first of the emo revolution

Greg Kihn Band: RocKihnRoll is literally the most clever album name I’ve ever seen

Guns N Roses: They have more than three good songs, but radio stations never recognize that

Hagar, Sammy: I’m still trying to figure out where he lived to take 16 hours to get to LA driving 55 and how fucking fast was he driving beforehand?

Harrison, George: He went from religious to rock, and if he had continued rocking, he would have gotten too cool 

Head East: I respect people who use breakfast foods as album names

Heart: Magic Man and Barracuda are played at least once every goddamn day. They’re not even the best songs!

Hendrix, Jimi: I have both a cousin and a sibling named after Hendrix references

Henley, Don: Dirty Laundry gives me too much inspiration

Hollies: Somehow sound like they’re both from the 60s and the 80s at the same time

Idol, Billy: he’s doing well for himself

INXS: Terminator vibes

Iris, Donnie: knockoff Roy Orbison

James Gang: too many funks

Jane’s Addiction: if TMNT had a grunge band representative

Jefferson Airplane: *assorted cheers*

Jefferson Starship: *assorted boos*

Jethro Tull: The only band to make you feel not cool enough to play the flute

Jett, Joan: icon

J. Geils Band: I requested them on the radio once and it got played

Joel, Billy: he really did just air everybody’s business like that

John Cafferty And The Beaver Brown Band: literally wtf is that name

John, Elton: yarn Elton sits in my basement, unstaring. Please someone take him from me

Joplin, Janis: Queen

Journey: Stop overplaying Don’t Stop Believing. It takes away from the rest of the repetoire

Judas Priest: literally started the gay leather aesthetic

Kansas: another fucking band Supernatural stole

Kenny Wayne Shepherd: the man confuses me to the point where he isn’t in the right place alphabetically

Kiss: Mick Mars and I will simply have to disagree on the subject

Kravitz, Lenny: runaway vibes

Led Zeppelin: Fucking fight me if you don’t think they’re the most talented band (maybe not the most talented individually, but collectively, no one comes close)

Lennon, John: My least favourite Beatle for reasons

Live: I got nothin

Living Colour: slap a decent amount

Loverboy: do you not get TURNT the fuck up to the big Loverboy hits? Who hurt you??

Lynyrd Skynyrd: Sweet Home Alabama is a Neil Young diss track

Marshall Tucker Band: no opinion

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band: VERY STRONG OPINIONS THAT THEY AREN’T GOOD

McCartney, Paul/Wings: Power couple

Meatloaf: I have nothing but respect for a man who willingly named himself Meatloaf

Mellencamp, John: voted cutest lesbian of 1987

Metallica: I liked their appearance on Jimmy Fallon

Midnight Oil: I get them confused for Talking Heads a lot

Modern English: who?

Molly Hatchet: Hollies vibes, but also Georgia Satellites vibes

Money, Eddie: DAN AVIDAN, IF YOU SEE THIS, COVER TAKE ME HOME TONIGHT

Motley Crue: Stan Mick Mars and John Corabi. They’re the only ones who deserve it

Mott The Hoople: no one loves them except for David Bowie

Mountain: props for naming an album ‘Climbing’

Nazareth: I want to make a John Mulaney joke here, but I can never come up with one

Nicks, Stevie: witch queen

Night Ranger: I get them confused with Urge Overkill

Nirvana: Kurt Cobain was the ally grunge needed

Nova, Aldo: he’s Canadian, at least

Nugent, Ted: *serves a ghost as jerky*

Offspring: nothing here

Osbourne, Ozzy: this bitch crazy

Outfield: Your Love is kind of a sketchy song, but it slaps hard

Palmer, Robert: low quality Eddie Money

Pearl Jam: *grunts in Eddie Vedder*

Petty, Tom: I have so many feelings about Tom Petty and they are all good

Pink Floyd: which one is Pink?

Plant, Robert: solo career is a crapshoot, but his voice is unparalleled

Poison: I want them to write a song called ‘Alice Cooper’

Pretenders: I want to say good things, but I have nothing to say

Queen: A doctor of astrophysics, a screaming girl, a disco queen and a diva walk into a bar. It’s Queen; they’re there to play a gig

Queensryche: neutral opinion

Quiet Riot: they got big because of a song they hated. I love that

Rafferty, Gerry: the second-sexiest sax opening in all of music

Rainbow: Ritchie Blackmore created something very magnificent

Ram Jam: one good song and they didn’t even write it

Ratt: I’m sure they have more than Round And Round, but I don’t know it

RHCP: funky, but if you have paid money to hear them, you’re going to The Bad Place (I don’t make the rules)

Red Rider: basically Golden Earring

Reed, Lou: Walk On The Wild Side would be such a cool song if it wasn’t so dull

REM: American Tragically Hip

REO Speedwagon: Props for having a dad joke as an album title

Rolling Stones: Never in my life could I imagine the drummer being named anything but Charlie

Rush: How to make being uncool the coolest fucking shit

Santana: The world needs more Santana

Scandal: There’s something really funny about The Warrior being my brother’s “song” with his girlfriend

Scorpions: Was Wind Of Change written by the CIA? Only the spotify podcast I got an ad for once could say

Seger, Bob: A different variety of Eric Clapton (frankly a better variety, but that’s just me)

Simple Minds: we ALL forgot about you

Skid Row: Sebastian Bach is prettier than all of us

Soundgarden: music that makes you feel like you dunked your head underwater

Springsteen, Bruce: my arch-nemesis. Maybe someday, he’ll find out about it

Squeeze: according to my friends, the stupidest band name ever, but they’re theatre kids, so you know

Squier, Billy: If he can make it through 1984 alive, you can make it through whatever bad day you’re having

Stealers Wheel: Yet another band who I always mistake for George Harrison

Steely Dan: my house’s nickname for the Robber in Settlers Of Catan

Steppenwolf: Either makes me think of Jay & Silent Bob, Jack Nicholson, or that time I had to cut 6lbs of onions

Steve Miller Band: when you’re in the right mood, they slap hard

Stewart, Rod: my soundtrack to summer 2015

Stills, Stephen: Love The One You’re With Is Catchy, but the lyrics are questionable

Stone Temple Pilots: the only band to write a song about goo you smear on yourself

Stray Cats: an obscene amount of merch is available for them

Styx: Supernatural would have ruined them for me too if I hadn’t been into them previously. 

Supertramp: I hunted for Breakfast In America for two years and it was worth every hunt

Sweet: I will never understand my two-month obsession with Ballroom Blitz when I was 15, but it was legit all I listened to

Talking Heads: you may find yourself in a pizza hut. And you may find yourself in a taco bell. And you may find yourself at the combination pizza hut and taco bell. And you may ask yourself; ‘how did I get here?’

Temple Of The Dog: I keep confusing them for Nazareth

Ten Years After: somehow still relevant

Tesla: not the car or the dude

The Beatles: Evokes a lot of opinions from people. Mine is that I love them

The Clash: I showed my sister the ‘Lock The Taskbar’ vine ONCE and it still kills her

The Doors: evokes teenage terror from deep within my soul

The Guess Who: Canada’s answer to confusing question-themed band names

The Kinks: kinky

The Police: wrote the theme of 2020 and everyone somehow forgot it was about a teacher resisting becoming a pedophile

The Ramones: playing all of their songs in a row wouldn’t take more than 2 hours

The Romantics: you don’t think you know them, but if you’ve seen Shrek 2, you have

The Who: If someone can explain Tommy to me, I’d be glad to hear it

The Zombies: I think they happened because of the 60s

Thin Lizzy: Could the boys maybe leave town?

Thorogood, George: blues, but make it modern

Toto: the most memed song behind All Star

Townshend, Pete: just makes me think of the end of Mr. Deeds

T-Rex: Mark Bolan is an icon

Triumph: The no-name brand of Rush

Tubes: like the yogurt

Twisted Sister: they did a christmas album and my mom does NOT hate it

U2: U2 Movers; we move in mysterious ways

Van Halen: RIP Eddie

Van Morrison: honestly, who’s named Van?

Vaughn, Stevie Ray: Steamy Ray Vaughn

Walsh, Joe: The Smoker You Drink The Player You Get

War: Foghat, but even groovier

Whitesnake: the most successful band to be named after a penis

Wright, Gary: the 90s thanks him for writing the song every movie used for the “guy sees cute girl and it’s love at first sight” scene

Yes: To Be Continued

Young, Neil: The best part of CSNY

Zevon, Warren: the album cover of Excitable Boy makes me deeply uncomfortable for reasons I don’t understand

ZZ Top: has been the same three guys since 1969. Lineup unchanged. 

3 Doors Down: They feel a little modern to be on a classic rock station, but whatever

38 Special: Why 38?

#I made this instead of doing homework #Classic Rock #Meme

[theggning]

I'd you've discussed it before, I missed it. So no pressure if you don't want to rehash, but ... Can I get your general thoughts on Elder Maxson? Your opinion of him/headcanons you might have?

He's such a complex character imo, and lately he's been living rent free in my head.

Yeah, absolutely! I’ve previously given him a lot of shit and I make fun of him often (we all know What He Did) but he is actually a really complex and fascinating character. 

I actually feel really sorry for Arthur Maxson. The poor kid never had a chance to be well-adjusted or have a normal life. Arthur is the last living descendant of the man who founded the Brotherhood of Steel, and he comes along at a time when the Brotherhood is heavily struggling for relevance. In the west, they’re strictly and dogmatically isolationist, and you end up with groups like the Mojave chapter fading into obscurity in a bunker. In the east, you’ve got Owyn Lyons, who makes a stand for what he believes in (altruism), gets his entire chapter disowned, and loses half of his soldiers because they disagree (the Outcasts from FO3.) 

Meanwhile, Arthur carries the blood and the name of the one person EVERYONE in the Brotherhood believes in. When we meet him in FO3, Squire Arthur Maxson is a smart, shy, gentle 10-year-old boy who’s been sent eastward away from his parents both to protect him and to “make him stronger” (his parents die while he’s away.) He had no friends his own age and no friends at all, actually (except for Liberty Prime-- a journal entry mentions a scribe chasing Arthur out of the lab and scolding him for trying to befriend a machine.) He hero-worships Sentinel Sarah Lyons, but he’s too young and clumsy to follow her out into the field. Everybody treats him like a small soldier or a messiah, no matter how he tries to downplay his lineage and claim to be a normal boy. This literal child spends his entire life being told he’s special and mighty with a “soul forged from eternal steel.”

The pressure and the expectations eventually start to push him into embracing his “destiny.” By 12, he’s improved his combat skills enough to kill two raiders on patrol. By 13, he single-handedly kills a deathclaw (and earns his face scar.) By 15 he’s taking out important super mutant leaders. And by 16, he’s so hardcore that the West Coast BoS gets back in touch with the East and names Arthur Elder. At the age normal teenage boys are socializing with peers or having friends or letting their brains finish developing, Arthur Maxson is the goddamn supreme commander of a military force. And the East Coast BoS actually thrives under him, becoming more powerful and relevant than they’ve ever been. And this is how we go from the shy, quiet squire to the charismatic, highly-beloved (MOTHERFUCKING 20-YEARS-OLD) Elder Arthur Maxson in FO4. 

I wouldn’t say that FO4!Arthur buys into his own hype. Despite how he’s been treated his whole life, he doesn’t believe that he is a god or a messiah. But he does believe literally every single word of the BoS codex. He does believe that they are saving humanity and doing what’s best for the future. He has been living as the legend people expected of him for years now, and is determined to continue down that path. 

I think in his own twisted way, Arthur actually does care about the people of the Commonwealth, as he claims to. But it’s in the same way that a king cares about his subjects. He knows what’s best for them and doesn’t really care to seek their input before doing what he likes. Though he genuinely does believe the Institute is evil and he genuinely wants to protect the world from their menace, he also comes to the Commonwealth because he wants to lead his own glorious war of liberation, the way Owyn Lyons did in the Capital. 

Also, for all people claim the BoS were “ruined” by Arthur in FO4, keep in mind that  

A. Lyons’ BoS and their charity and altruism were actually outliers- most of the BoS are a bunch of isolationist asswipes (see: the entire West Coast branch) B. The BoS hating non-human races is the norm, not the exception C. Arthur has actually fairly smoothly integrated BoS traditions with Lyons’ more fair and altruistic beliefs (which he grew up with.) He clearly maintains a lot of respect for the Lyons family (even if the current BoS party line is to denigrate them in favor of praising Arthur.) 

Here are some things that Arthur has commanded of his BoS that make them the kinder, gentler version of the faction, and also just some general nice things he’s done as Elder: 

Civilians are ordered to be treated fairly. BoS soldiers are not permitted to harm them (except in self defense) and any and all tech they possess is to be traded for fairly with food and medicine. If they refuse to trade, they are left alone. 

BoS soldiers are to defend civilians and initiate proactive strikes on super mutants, feral ghouls, Institute synths, and other threats. BoS vertibird crews are to protect caravans from above. 

BoS soldiers are to be monitored for mental health concerns as well as physical. Arthur explicitly orders Cade to treat all mental conditions the same way he would treat an injury. 

He shows deep personal concern for his staff and crew. This is notable in the terminal entries re: Ingram, where Arthur is apologetic for denying her field duty-- and when she disobeys him and goes to Mass Fusion anyway, all he does for punishment is to write her a sternly worded letter. 

Arthur Maxson is a cold, brutal, unflinching military dictator with a god complex. He is a lonely, frightened child carrying the weight of the world and desperately trying to prove himself. He’s a compassionate, charismatic leader. He’s a terrifying enemy. He’s an idealistic liberator who wants to protect humanity. He’s a dogmatic bigot who thinks evolving his views is showing weakness. He’s all of these at the same time. He could only get the wide and varied fandom reception he does by having this many facets of his personality, and by being one of the most complicated characters in the game. 

And okay, I’ll say it: his beard and his jacket are pretty sexy. 

#fallout 4 #arthur maxson #gg answers #i pick on him but honestly maxson is really interesting #he's just mean to my boy so i want to give him a swirly #he's a great and complex ally/antagonist and they did an amazing job with him #fallout meta

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

Among Us writing request if you get the chance~ That one episode of the Hermitcraft & Friends Among Us where the ghosts are all chanting "Kill! Kill! Kill!" to Pungence? :D

i actually wrote this back in February when the episode first came out, but i dont think i ever posted it here so here you go! polished it up a bit too :)

...

“Okay, Skizz didn’t kill anyone that time,” said Tango, looking around at the other three people’s faces around the table. “So it’s Pungence or Etho.”

“It’s Pungence,” said Etho.

“It’s Etho,” said Pungence.

Tango scoffed. “Wow, never saw THAT coming. What’s your gut saying, Skizz?”

Skizz groaned. “I’m so torn. Etho, say some words for me, buddy.”

“Quickly,” added Tango.

After a long pause, Etho’s high-pitched voice said, “Hey, everybody…!”

“It’s Etho!” yelped Skizzle, voting for the cyan crewmate. “I’m voting Etho; I might be wrong!”

Tango hurriedly locked in his vote as well. “Oh, please be right!”

Etho didn’t dare look as the votes were revealed. After a moment, he peeked through his hands and was both shocked and relieved to find that, despite Tango and Skizz voting for him, he was safe. Both he and Pungence had voted to skip.

“Oh no!” Skizz gasped. “He’s gonna kill us!”

Etho narrowed his eyes. “Okay, I’m suspicious of you, now, Skizzle.”

“Of course you are. Quick, everyone stay away from him!”

At that moment, the O2 alarm went off. Etho immediately rushed for the lower one, while the other three ran up and around to O2. After he’d entered the code, Etho took off after his friends, catching up with them in the corridor outside O2.

Meanwhile, Pungence was starting to become disoriented from the yelling that only he could hear. He now had the voices of Grian, Bdubs, and Beans chanting, “KILL! KILL! KILL!” in his ears, as well as Impulse’s voice yelling indistinctly amid the din.

Finally, he couldn’t take it anymore. He drew his gun and, without hesitating, shot Tango in the back, sending him down immediately.

He wasn’t fully aware of what had just happened until the report alarm flashed and everyone was teleported to the table. Pungence stared across the table at Skizz and Etho, realisation dawning in his mind. He had just killed someone right in front of the other two crewmates on the ship.

As soon as they all appeared at the table, Skizz dissolved into laughter.

“Okay…” Pungence hesitated, knowing he had to say something, and quickly. “I had some voices in my head… I don’t think they understood what was going on…”

As Skizz continued to laugh helplessly, Etho leant forward on the table, a grin hiding behind his mask. “Really? What were they telling you?”

“Well…”

Pungence screwed up his face as he tried to think desperately for something to say, some explanation for the incident that had just taken place. But try as he might, he just couldn’t do it.

“Just do what you gotta do,” he chuckled bitterly.

Skizz gasped for breath through his laughter. “Oh, man! It was you, right, Pungence?”

Pungence stared at him. “Wait, what?”

“I-I think I blinked, or something; it all happened so fast. It- It had to be you, right?”

“No, it- it was Etho!” Pungence’s heart leapt at the opportunity. “You didn’t see it?! It must have been Etho!”

Skizz groaned and buried his face in his hands. “Agh, I should have been paying better attention!” He turned to his friend. “Etho, say stuff!”

Half-stunned that Skizz somehow hadn’t seen what had happened right in front of them, all Etho could manage was, “It wasn’t me, it was Pungence.”

“No, no, it was Etho!” Pungence burst out. “He did it right in front of you!”

“Dangit, this is all falling on me! I didn’t actually see who did it!” Skizz groaned again and threw his arms up. “And right now, Tango’s gotta be yelling his head off at me.”

“YOU’RE GODDAMN RIGHT,” Tango screeched in his best friend’s face. “You’re lucky I’m a ghost or I’d kick your ass!”

Impulse gently took hold of Tango’s arms and pulled him away from Skizz. “Buddy, he can’t hear you.”

Tango strained against Impulse’s grip, jabbing his transparent finger at his alive best friend. “Skizz, if you eject Etho, I swear to God, I’m gonna kill you when you get here!”

Skizz’s distress was starting to get the better of him. “Etho, say more words! Please!”

“I cleared the other O2, Skizz,” Etho said quickly. “All three of you went to the other one so all I would’ve had to do if I was the imposter was just stand there in admin and do nothing.”

Skizz stared at Etho. “You DID clear the other O2. That’s right…”

“Does that help?” Etho asked, somewhat nervously.

“That helps.”

Skizz locked in his vote for Pungence, who couldn’t help laughing bitterly. “I was that close. I can’t believe you didn’t see me commit murder right in front of you.”

Etho snorted softly. “Well, I can’t believe you committed murder right in front of two witnesses. What exactly happened there?”

“I had three ghosts screaming “Kill! Kill! Kill!” in my ear over and over again,” said Pungence wearily. “I got so disoriented that I guess I didn’t realise that there were still four of us left, not three.”

Soon enough, the timer hit zero and Pungence was ejected, ending the game.

As everyone appeared back in the lobby, Pungence said, "Okay, uh... Why was everyone chanting "kill kill kill"?"

"That was my bad," Grian admitted sheepishly. "I thought you only needed one kill so I started yelling "kill!" at you and everyone else joined in."

"Why didn't you vote for Etho, Pungey?" asked Bdubs. "At the meeting before Tango died. You'd have won if you voted for Etho."

Pungence gave a chuckle. "I know. I was trying to clear myself but I ended up ruining it. Dangit."

"Dude, you almost won that," Skizz said. "I was THIS close to voting for Etho, even after I watched you kill Tango."

Tango shot him a glare. "You're such a moron, Skizz. Pungence killed me LITERALLY right in front of you and you "didn't see it"?"

"Hey, I'm not observant, okay!" said Skizz defensively. "I'm sorry!"

"It's okay, I'm just gonna kill you first next time."

"You better not!"

#hermits among us #pungence #grian #etho #skizzleman #tangotek #vaunna’s requests

[bellatrixxue]

Xue’s Supernatural Dare: Wendigo (S1 EP2)

Hello, everyone? How did everyone feel about the finale? Yes? Yes? Oh. Oh. Oh my. Oh, dear.

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell that half-assed homophobic chicken-shit fuckbucket’s not gonna stop me, since I strapped myself onto this roller coaster already and I promised I’m not getting out until the ride’s over, so here we go, wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Also, those who are in this roller coaster with me, ready? Tag list is: @fangirlxwritesx67​ @amazingiam00​ @kalliravenne​ @indecisive20something​ @2musiclover2​ @impossibletosleepthrough @there-must-be-a-lock​ @wingedcatninja​ @arvit​

Oh my gods this recap is so cheesy I actually can make a fondue out of it. 2000s, everybody!

A WHOLE MINUTE AND A HALF FOR THAT FONDUE

FUCKJUMPSCARETITLEFUCKYOU

So we’re starting the episode with the murder scene first, eh? Is that gonna be a trend?

Oh come on, Chads, you’re out in nature and you’re playing video games? Absorb the nature...before it absorbs you!

Waitwait. Holy shit is that...is that Cory Monteith? Oh, bless his soul...

If the wendigo eats his dick as he’s peeing I’m immediately giving Jensen Ackles $100. For no real reason, I just feel like giving him money for already carrying the show on his back.

I can’t tell if it did or not, so I’m not paying yet.

Aw, Sammy...

"I should have told you the truth.” *Vine voice* BUT YOU DIDN’T

FUCKYOUINTHEASSHOhnightmare. Nightmare. So did he visit her at her grave or not? I need answers.

A week? Goddamn. Poor thing. That man-eating tree’s fucking good at his job, man.

“There’s nothing there, it’s just...woods,” Sam, I don’t know if Jess’s death hit you hard or if you got into law school by eating some ancient dick and/or pussy instead of earning that high score fair and square, but the woods “in the middle of nowhere” (your words) are known to be one of the top places full of weird-ass creatures. Even kindergartners know that.

Ehehehehehehehehe he’s so smol next to his lil bro my lil shit

At least you’re coming up with decent covers this time. No Agent Mulder and Scully ruining things for you this time around.

“Bull” oop-

Oh Dean’s a smoooooooooth operator. Good going, buddy.

AND HE GOT A COPY OF THAT DOCUMENT TEAM DEAN TEAM DEAN

Oh that death really got to Sam. I hope he doesn’t turn out to be a trigger-happy psycho. Or eat the man-eating tree and become one himself.

Oh, Haley’s a cutie! Which one’s her brother? Cory? Discount Enrique Iglesias?

Do you have a card for EVERY profession, Dean? And how do I get them too?

That is a very pretty car. I bet they wasted half the budget on that thing.

Okay, sonny boy, little bro, Broseidon, calm down.

Ah, fuck, Haley and Broseidon is gonna go into the woods, that’s more heads to worry about.

How the fuck does Sam find information this fast? I’m impressed, I take five hours to get to one article for my research paper. Or maybe I’m just lazy. So he really earned his law school interview without having to eat dick and pussy, huh.

Every 23 years? What is this, Pennywise? Are we going to see the wendigo do his best Tim Curry do his best scary clown impression? Honk honk?

“Whatever that thing is, it can move.” And the sun rises on the East, Sammy. Why are you so smart and dumb at the same time? Is this his character trait? It might grow on me.

Ahhh, so Sam’s go-to move at interrogation is doing puppy dog eyes and sympathize with the person. He’d make a good lawyer, shame that man-eating tree.

Go Grandpa Exposition, go!

Go Grandpa Exposition, go, give us information and none at all!

OH GEEZ THAT SCAR. PENNYWISE WENDIGO IS VICIOUS.

Skinwalker, Back Dog...Ooh, those all sound cool! I hope we get to see them soon!

‘Corporeal’ doesn’t sound like a real word, but then again, English doesn’t sound like a real language. Sorry. Moving on.

Sam’s gonna eat the wendigo with that attitude, Jesus Christ.

AND HIS BROTHER, AT THIS RATE. If the real villain turns out to be inside Sam all along I’m gonna flip. Is that why women keep dying and burning on ceilings where he sleeps? Is he secretly Lucifer’s spawn or something?

“Oh sweetheart I don’t wear shorts”. They queer-coded him from the start and they tried to make you believe he was straight for fifteen seasons straight? And some people bought that?

Oh, crap, another crappy death treatment for Cory before he got into Glee...No, I wasn’t into Glee, I just watched a few episodes and I might hate Rachel Berry...And Lea Michele...ahem...

Dean is totally flirting with Roy shut upppppppp

OOP AND THERE ROY GOES OH THE SEXUAL TENSION IS HIGH IN THESE WOODS TODAY

“It’s probably the most honest I’ve been with a woman. Ever.” See. Bi. Bi bi bi.

So...why the coordinates, Daddy Negan? Is this a portal to Hell? A place where man-eating trees grow?

*carefully places death flag on Roy*

Ooooh the campsite is very...haunted house-y. You know what I’m saying?

That’s not Discount Enrique Iglesias, but Pennywise wendigo, yes? Those things can mimic human voices, right?

*Google searches*...There are so many versions of this tale I can’t even confirm or deny it. Dammit.

Maybe Pennywise wendigo just wants some snacks and a nice phone and GPS? Maybe he misses his family in uh, Canada or something?

Daddy Negan’s journal is  a e s t h e t i q u e .

I’m so sorry, but the way Sammy smirks as he speaks with those dark, dark voids for eyes? My boy’s a demon. He’s a demon, I’m telling you.

At least Haley has some sense to her. *puts another death flag on Roy*

*PUTS YET ANOTHER DEATH FLAG ON ROY*

True, that. What the heck is Daddy Negan up to with all of this?

“Saving people, hunting things, the family business!” Okay, the way Dean said it gave me chills.

I can actually empathize with Sam here...As whiny and bitchy as he is, he has his reasons to be this way. I guess if I were in his shoes, I’d be less of a Dean and more of a Sam, too. We deal with our losses quite similarly.

Ah, the brotherly bonding moments like these little talks make the show worth it. It’s so heartwarming.

Pennywise wendigo! I didn’t miss you, why’re you here to burst my happy bubble?

I’m starting to see a slight parallel between Haley and Broseidon and Dean and Sammy. Hmm.

Nice meeting you, Roy. Zoop you go.

Haley and Broseidon are taking this rather well, I’m glad they do.

Okay, actual exposition time, thank you.

Whoa, Broseidon speaks! Donner Party! Please don’t remind me of that! Those poor people!

Hibernation and food storage. Delightful, just delightful.

TORCHING? *CALLS RAMMSTEIN*

Somehow, not being able to see the wendigo is scarier to me than what I will probably see itself. Limited budget horror can actually work well.

Oh, dear, Roy literally did a death drop. Badum tissssssssss.

FUCK IT TOOK DEAN THE ONLY CHARACTER I CARE ABOUImean I love you too, Sam! Come on, let’s find him before it’s too late!

A trail of M&Ms! Yes, Broseidon! And Hansel and Gretel refercalled it. Sammy, you and I share the same wavelength?

SHITSHITTHEYTRIPPEDANDFELLINTHEFUCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

Thank the gods the Pennywise wendigo kept them right there. Chances.

DISCOUNT ENRIQUE IGLESIAS IS STILL ALIVE GEEZ BUT ALSO PHEW

Ah, Dean Winchester, I love you so much that I can’t even begin to describe it.

Also how convenient that the flare guns are there. Deus ex machina!

Haley would bode well as a hunter, look at her courage, her will. There are more hunters around than Daddy Negan and the brothers, right?

Yeah, seeing the actual wendigo makes me less scared of it now. It’s unnerving, but still.

TEAM DEAN YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEHAW

Graphics are...alright, but it’s the thought that counts!

Running with the grizzly bear story. Smart Broseidon. Ben. Sorry, you deserve to be called by your real name. I think with practice they could become good hunters, along with their Discount Enrique Iglesias brother! Is there a fanfiction for that? Can I write it now?

...

I AM WILLING TO DIE TO PROTECT DEAN WINCHESTER I

Haley’s a lesbian, that’s why she kissed him on the cheek only. Headcanoned. Also I have a crush on her, she’s really pretty? Like? Heart eyes???

Ah, the siblings parallels again. Let’s hope neither of the two brothers end up in the bed like that.

“Man, I hate camping.” Really. Really really. Really.

“I’m driving”

...

SAM WINCHESTER I’M SORRY I EVER SPOKE ILL OF YOU I WILL PROTECT YOU WITH MY LIFE TOO I PROMISE YOU I WILL

It’s just a sassy bisexual brother and his little snide bisexual brother on the road to kill evil creatures and find their father and I love this show? Help? Help???

I really, really see the charm of Supernatural now! I’m fully invested in both brothers and their story, and I’m cheering them both on! Let’s get Daddy Negan back and get rid of that man-eating tree once and for all!

Six stars out of five!

⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

This dare is introducing me to a whole new world, and I really, really am glad I took that jump a few days ago, man!

Thank you everyone for reading my ramblings, and I’ll see you in the day after with the next review! Thank you for sticking with me! Buh-bye!

- Xue

#xue's supernatural dare #spn #supernatural #dean winchester #jensen ackles #sam winchester #jared paladecki #text #i had a really bad day today with my constant pain and aching from the chemo #but this really brought genuine smiles to my face! #what a good show #what a wonderful show #how the FUCK did they fuck it up later #well #i guess i'll find out when i get there lmao

[honhonluigi]

What do you think about the ending of v3 and the plot twist?

I don't have time to go into a big emotional essay like I normally do for reviews and shit, so, I'm just gonna sum it up:

I fucking hated it. It was so stupid, and it made no sense. The ending of V3 thought it was being so meta by making the fictional characters we see into 'actual fictional characters' in the story, but it was just fucking dumb. And bad writing.

1). It made no sense. It made no sense at all. Literally nothing in the entire goddamn lore of V3 made any fucking sense. It did not work with the rest of the canon lore of the games. It went directly against the canon lore of the other games. It went directly against events that happened in the third game given that we see the 'pregame' versions of the characters in the prologue and they act normal, and nothing like their supposed pre-game personalities in the audition tapes. It made no sense. It went against itself, and the other games. It didn't work.

2). The pre-game concepts of the characters suck. They're all emo or Edgelord annoying pieces of shit with no real personality. Why would I care about these people and what happened to them after they 'signed up'? Seemed like they fucking deserved it. Also, people take these pre-game characters who have no personalities, and they use them more than canon characters. I see more pre-game content than I do content of the actual characters. But because pre-game characters have only one line and no personality, everything about them is made up. It just makes for a bunch of emo edgelord OCs with famous names and designs. And it's obnoxious.

3. It was trying way too fucking hard to be meta. I hate games that think they're hot shit because they know they're video games (Undertale, Doki Doki). Yeah, bitch. I know I'm playing a game. You're not surprising me. I fucking know already. You're not cool for telling me that. Everybody knows we're playing a game. And it's annoying when stories seem more like they exist to push a singular theme than they do to actually tell a story, which is what V3 did with their meta-bullshit. Trying too hard to seem original, insightful, and cool when in reality it was just an obnoxious copy of every other 'meta' game.

4. And that ^ was a horrible writing decision for several reasons. Primarily, it separated us even more from the characters. When you're writing fiction, you need suspension of disbelief. You're trying to make people forget that they're reading fiction. You're trying to make them invested and immersed in what they feel is a real world. When you push it so hard into their face that something is fiction, you're killing that. It's not cool. It's not fun. It's just bad writing. It kills any sense of reality and continuity in the fiction. It removes the reader from the story and the characters. We already have a degree of separation that you have to work hard, as a writer, to overcome. Because these are fictional characters. But when you constantly remind everyone of that, it makes that separation worse. It reminds everyone that they're just reading fiction with no bearing and no consequence. Then they stop caring, and they stop being interested.

5. On the same branch as the separation, it was horrible writing decision because: it made nothing matter. If Tsumugi and Team DR wrote everyone's plots, decided everything for them, an even created their personalities, then nothing mattered. Why did I fucking read any of this? Why did I bother? These people aren't real people, even in the context of the story (back to double separation), their relationships aren't 'real', and their character arcs aren't 'real'. If Tsumugi wrote them all, that just means that they aren't people. That nothing they did mattered. That their relationships weren't formed by real bonding, but forced for no reason. So they don't matter. And every decision they made and growth they achieved was not based on their experiences and personality, but just written in. It made sure that none of the things any of these characters did, experienced, felt, or loved ever actually mattered. It takes away everything that I read. Why the fuck did I bother?

And I know that the point of it was to parallel how we feel about these fictional characters, vs. how the audience felt about them. Like I said, they were trying really hard to be meta. They were trying really hard to seem insightful for telling us all shit that we already knew. It didn't work. They tried too hard when they had nothing to say. Anyway, I know the point of the game is saying 'well if you think these characters/their relationships matter when you're reading them, and they're fictional, then why would that change just because they're fictional in the game?' And it's supposed to be a witty parallel. But it doesn't work. Because of being too meta. Because of double separation, like I said. It takes away everything from the characters. Nothing matters. You're showing me that, not only are these characters not real in reality, but they're also not even real in the fiction that I'm reading. They're not real in their own story. The story that I was attached to? That I stayed for? They're not real in that. That story wasn't real either. Nothing fucking mattered. Nothing actually happened. The double separation is never cool. It's always going to ruin your story forever, just like Doki Doki. And it's true. I cared about V3 and the characters in it. But once Tsumugi revealed the TV show bs to us, I stopped caring. I felt cheated. I had put so much care into this story that wasn't even real in the story itself. As soon as I heard that, I absolutely stopped giving a fuck about the characters. Because nothing mattered. The characters I should really care about for this story are the pregame characters, since apparently the other characters didn't fucking exist. But their pregame personalities are obnoxious and we barely get to see them.

6. The ending literally fucking punished the audience for liking the games. Again, they thought they'd be really cool by showing us a parallel between ourselves and our fiction. But it wasn't cool. It was just obnoxious. Because 'you like seeing these people suffer! You get off on it!' Yeah, I like seeing people suffer in fiction, because otherwise there's no plot. But a lot of other people just like to see them be happy. Why do you think there's so much fluffy fanfiction in the world? Most people endure DR suffering because it's the only way they can see the characters. It's not like DR has a lot of games where everybody just sits around being friends and having fun. That aside, they just yelled at and berated their audience for enjoying the games. Called them cruel for watching these characters suffer and liking it. They punished and alienated their fans. You think that's a good idea? Just because they wanted to seem cool.

Not to mention that the moral lesson just didn't hold up. Us enjoying content that someone else wrote is not the same as taking real living people, re-wiring their brains, and writing them into a TV show where they actually die brutal deaths. But the games wanted to act like it was the same, to seem cool, to make us 'think' about ourselves. The lesson wasn't true. They were saying shit that was straight up false. So they just looked stupid and pompous. Trying to act like what Tsumugi was doing was the exact same as just writing a video game. Not at all. Not at fucking all.

Also, they tried to hold the audience hostage for liking the characters. They tried to justify their shitty writing by being like 'if you care about these people even if they're fictional, then you can't stop caring about them once we reveal that they're TV show characters!' and 'if you think their relationships had value even if they were just writing, then you can't take that back when Tsumugi says she wrote them!' Yes I can, and I will. Because of the double separation. These characters and their relationships mattered to me because I liked their fictional story. But then you turn around and tell me that their story didn't even exist? That they didn't exist? You turn around and change all of their relationships, which I watched grow with pride, into something that canonically has nothing to do with their personalities, and everything to do with Tsumugi. Yeah, that ruins it. No amount of emotional gaslighting is gonna change that, V3. When you destroy the story and the characters that I enjoyed, I'm going to stop fucking caring about it. I cared about their story, and you made them not even exist in the context of that story. Now they are nothing, and their real story is nothing. They don't exist in their own story. Tsumugi wrote them. The fact that a character in the story wrote the other characters in the story is so fucking...dumb. It makes everything so fake and inconsequential. Nothing matters. It's a fictional story and characters that I don't care about, deliberately replacing a fictional story and characters that I do care about. That's way different from seeing a bunch of characters all written by the same person, in a fictional story that takes itself seriously and aims to become like a real world to people, and acts like a real world. Yes, it is different. Yes, it is bad. You're not tricking me. And that's annoying, that the game tried to gaslight and blackmail and trick you into thinking the writing was smart or good, all because you liked the characters in the beginning. No. This is completely different. Liking the characters in V3 was not even close to the bullshit Tsumugi TV show plot, no matter how much they try to convince you otherwise.

7. And it all comes down to shock value. It's an unfortunate trend that new media is leaning towards hardcore. They prize shocking the audience and putting in random plot twists more than they prize satisfying conclusions and sensible endings. They try so hard to surprise you that they deliberately lie, cover up, and obscure parts of the plot just to throw it in your face later. You're not allowed to predict anything, or know what's going on. You are specifically told the opposite of what is going on, just so they can surprise you. It's weak and it sucks. Because if you can't see those plot twists coming at all, then they just don't make sense. They show up and they feel forced, disjointed, and nonsensical. Because they are. If you can 'see something coming', then that just means that the outcome makes sense. And good writers can create stories with sensible plot progressions that are satisfying, yet also have surprises and excitement as well. But nah, everybody's way too focused on 'shock value' to write a decent story. Everything in V3 was nothing but shock. Ex: Kaede's murder. We are deliberately told that she doesn't do anything, and everything she does towards the murder is obscured and hidden, so that we won't predict it. And when it happens, it just feels cheap. I felt cheated. You know that they deliberately lied to you just to shock you, and it sets the tone for the whole rest of the game. Like the Flashback Lights, which are just lies that are passed off as true by the game itself until the big shocking reveal. It's annoying to feel lied to in a story, not by an unreliable narrator or character for the sake of the plot, but by the author themselves. It's an insult to my intelligence. Do you think I'm that stupid? Do you think I need blinders? And now I can't trust anything that happens, not for the sake of suspense and mystery, but for the sake of 'we need ratings and you mean nothing but capital to us'. It's not being used to tell the story at all. It's just about sensationalism. And it's obnoxious.

(Ironically, that 'shock value' ends up being super predictable as well. When iCarly came out, I could see that Sam and Freddy hated each other, and I knew right away that they were going to end up dating, because it would be 'what we didn't see coming'. Same with Duncan and Courtney from TDI. It's so predictable and boring.)

8. Another bad decision from V3 is that this lore ruined the other two games. It absolutely destroyed them, by saying that it was all fake too. The characters, the story, the experiences, and the lore that they had spent so many years carefully cultivating and telling? Nah. That's all fucking gone. It's all fake! It doesn't exist! They threw out the canon from their other two games-- they just threw out the games themselves-- all for the sake of some shock value. And now V3 doesn't even feel like it's in the same franchise, because it doesn't exist in the same world as the other games.

9. They had a million different, stupid plot twists. It's like nobody knew what to do with the lore for this one that would be 'different' (Hint: it shouldn't be different lore if it's in the same fucking universe), so they just threw around a bunch of backstory ideas, and they decided to go with all of them. The space colony, the crash to Earth, the apocalypse, the Ultimate Hunt, the second Hope's Peak, the re-birth of despair, and then the TV show thing. Through the flashback lights, they literally tried to pass off every single backstory as true. Even before the TV reveal, this was annoying and just confusing. They obviously had no idea what they were doing. They threw around so many conflicting ideas. So it was pretty clear that we were being lied to. And all of those backstories are bad for their own reasons. But none of them even come close to being as bad as the TV show one.

So, to sum up? Bad. Worst writing I've seen in a DR game. I hated it. But-- Do I think they did this just because they 'didn't care' about V3? No. If they didn't care about V3, they wouldn't have bothered to make it. They did this because they fell prey to shock value sensationalism. It's definitely not the first or only bad trope that DR has fallen victim to. I mean, look at Junko! And it's not out of character for DR to have horrible, shitty lore. The Despair lore itself is all shit anyway, except for Izuru. Everything about the Despair lore and Junko's place in it is just...dumb and bad. So it's not crazy or out of left-field for them to make a mistake like this. They do it in every game. I don't think it's evidence of V3 being 'the worst game' or 'they secretly hated it!' I think it's just Team DR being Team DR. Being a sensationalist anime franchise that embraces bad sensationalist anime tropes because...it's anime. (Which is why I don't like anime).

BUT. All that being said: I don't think the TV show ending is true. It's definitely left open for interpretation. There's a lot of evidence to show that Tsumugi is just straight-up lying to them. It wouldn't be the first time (flashback lights), and we see that she obviously programs thoughts, images, actions, memories, etc to look real even when they're not. (flashback lights again). So it's not a far leap to say that she could fake the audition tapes, and the audience. Especially because we see the pregame characters in the prologue, and they act exactly the same as they normally do. Not how they acted in the audition tapes. Obviously, the other two games canonically weren't TV shows. Tsumugi's 'cospox' excuse is bullshit because, given that Kaede is by Tsumugi's own admission a fictional character, she should be able to cosplay her just fine. And so it proves nothing that she can cosplay the other games' characters. Also, when she 'got cospox' she changed in the supply closet that led directly to her evil lair. Sus much? But I'm not just taking biased evidence because I don't want it to be true. The game itself gives you that option. Shuichi talks to Maki and Himiko at the end of the game, and tells them that he doesn't think it was a TV show at all, and that he thinks Tsumugi was lying. That at least tells us that we have the option to come to our own conclusion and be justified in it. The whole theme of the third game was truth vs. lies, so it fits. I think the game definitely gives you the choice of thinking that it is true or not, and I choose to think 'not', because it's a really bad ending.

But. That choice doesn't absolve the game's bad writing. Clearly they pushed the TV show ending a lot more. Clearly they wanted people to believe it. And the fact that they even leave it as a choice to be the 'true ending' is a sin in and of itself.

[actualbird]

nobody asked but i think hanso, brynn, and xandra from neopets’ comic “the faeries’ ruin” are queer | a 1.8k presentation i am presenting to my friends at an online party on the 19th, but you guys get early access because for some godforsaken reason, you like this content from me

Good evening class.

Last last time I attacked your dashboards with a long post, I discussed Neopets that would benefit from therapy. I’m sticking with my Neopets shtick but in a funkier Pride flavor. In this post, I will be discussing why the three main characters of Neopets’ “The Faeries Ruin” are queer. 

So what is “The Faeries Ruin?”

“The Faeries Ruin” was a Neopets plot that ran through January of 2011. Plots can affect the website's appearance, services, and gameplay, and this plot was most notable because it turned all the Faeries of Neopia to stone. 

Quick crash course on Neopets lore, for those of you who don’t know anything about it: Neopets are the main population of the planet of Neopia, but they share the world with other creatures as well. One of these creatures are Faeries, magical beings who can be benevolent or malevolent. Majority of them are good, and can be visited to receive gifts, abilities, new appearances, better stats, etc. Faeries are the most powerful creatures on Neopia. With the Faeries of Neopia turned to stone, all Faerie run services, from games to shops, were suspended because. Well. It’s hard to run a business when you’re stone. 

“The Faeries Ruin” had an accompanying quest to play through, items to collect, puzzles to solve, and most important to our discussion, is the accompanying comic to read.

“The Faeries Ruin” comic is 17 chapters plus an epilogue. You can read the synopsis on the slide, and the story follows Hanso, a thief, Brynn, a guard, and Xandra, a scholar, who are all investigating the curse put on the Faeries.

A lot happens in the comic. Really, a LOT, so I don’t have time to summarize it for you. If you’re curious, you can read the plot here, and I’ll explain plot stuff as it becomes relevant to our discussion, but what’s really important are the characters. 

These three in particular, Hanso, Brynn, and Xandra, are who I will be focusing on from the queer perspective.

But because I aim to be inclusive, before we dive into calling Neopets characters queer, we need a quick crash course in ‘queer’ definitions. 

This is just so that we’re all on the same page. (Also so that I can use the readings I got from the queer theory class I was in last semester.)

Alex Pilcher in the Introduction of “A Queer Little History of Art” gives the word “queer” three definitions. First is the simplest, the word “queer” can act as an umbrella term for anybody who is not straight or cisgendered. The second definition is “queer” as an identity in itself. Instead or in addition to using sexuality or gender labels, one can opt to identify as queer and that does away with any hierarchies or too small definitions that may bother other people. I, for example, am bisexual, asexual, and nonbinary. However, that’s kind of a mouthful, and sometimes I don’t want to explain every facet of my identity. So sometimes I just tell people I’m queer, and fuck them if that’s confusing, it feels good for me. The third definition of “queer” is what I will be referring to quite a lot of times in this discussion, “queer” as a deviation from the norm. This is a callback to the word’s more archaic use, meaning odd or strange. What is “queer” then is what goes beyond or resists against society’s expectations.

Queer Theory is a huuuuuuuge academic genre, and this is just the tip of the iceberg. But we’re on a schedule here, so let’s queer some goddamn Neopets.

First, we have Hanso. 

His Neopets species is an Ixi and he is a young rogue/thief. He knows Brynn because he’s a very shitty thief and he constantly gets captured by her. His personality is self centered and egocentric, but deep down, he has a heart of gold, even if his morals are a little skewed. 

Also I think he’s bisexual. Why? 

As a rogue/thief, he is outcasted by society, a type of queering from the norm. He is only accepted by those like him, which symbolically is parallel to how queer people often find other queer people to be with. Aside from Brynn, nobody trusts him. They think him to be a liar and a cheat, and this, I think, is parallel to the unsavory trope of the “untrustworthy bisexual.” Much the same way bisexuals are often told to “pick a side”, Hanso has both a desire for good and a desire for mischief, a duality that confuses other Neopets, and makes them wary of him.   

Hanso is bisexual. And he isn’t sorry about it.

Next up we have one of my early childhood crushes. Brynn.

Brynn is a Kougra, a feline like Neopets species. She is a guard/soldier from the land of Brightvale. She knows Hanso because she keeps catching him, he’s a terrible thief. Her personality is one dominated by courage and a duty to Neopia’s safety.

And I think she’s also bisexual, but more interesting to me her queer expression of masculinity.

Jack Halberstam, a transgender man, wrote a book called “Female Masculinities” prior to his transition (I mention this because I know a lot of you may be wondering why a man gets any say about women’s issues, but I think this is a special case and that his views are still valid.) Halberstam, in his book, posits the concept of masculinity divorced from maleness. What this means, in simplest terms, is that masculinity is not something inherently male, just predominantly male. A female masculinity is thus outside of the norm, and a unique and queer expression of gender.

Concepts related to masculinity are things like power and rebellion. Strength, force, will, that kind of stuff. When we remove these things from maleness and allow femaleness to have these concepts, one of the results is tomboyism. The phenomenon of tomboyism is when a girl, usually young, exhibits masculine qualities. The thing about tomboyism is that it is reluctantly permitted during childhood but less expected as one grows older, the assumption being that a woman will submit to the societal expectations of what a woman is “supposed to be.”

I cannot find any canon sources to say that sexism is a huge problem in Neopia, but gender roles are still present. While we don’t see Brynn’s childhood in “The Faeries Ruin”, it doesn’t take much to imagine that her peers would be surprised with her choice to join the Brightvale Guard, a traditionally male pursuit. And yet she does it. She works hard and becomes such a good soldier that she aids King Altador himself during the story, that King Altador trusts and respects her opinions. Brynn rebels against society’s standards and asserts her own power.

Her personality exudes masculinity as well. Throughout “The Faeries Ruin” she is often dominant over the course of investigation, taking initiative, sometimes omitting truths for the greater good, and generally holding her judgement in high regard. 

Her choices, especially in regards to her relationship with Hanso, is also something of note. Brynn is the one doing the catching and Hanso is the one being caught, an interesting subversion of expected gender roles. I will admit now that I have been withholding some information. Hanso, later in the plot of “The Faeries Ruin”, admits that he wanted to get caught by her as often as possible so that he would have an excuse to see her. Brynn did not know this, but I see it as a Hanso recognizing Brynn’s power and masculinity. I see it as a very romantic submission of Hanso to Brynn. 

So Brynn is bi, because I say so. And she expresses masculinity in a unique, queer, and female way.

Now, before we move onto the last character, Xandra, I need to talk to you guys about Brynn and Hanso’s relationship. I think it is very good, it was one of my first OTPs, and here’s three reasons why it’s a good ship.

Reason 1: They’re both queer, so like, it’s better than the usual M/F couple. Bi people have more genders they’re attracted to, so the person they do end up choosing had to be better than literally everybody else. We can rest assured both of them are good eggs that are compatible with each other.

Reason 2: Their relationship over the course of “The Faeries Ruin” is that of the “enemies to friends to lovers” trope. Which, HELLO? GOOD SHIT? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP? THE HOSTILITY SLOWLY GIVING WAY TO RESPECT? THE RESPECT TURNING INTO ADMIRATION? Your honor, it’s delicious.

Reason 3: This reason is an NSFW concept, so if you don’t wanna see that, just Ctrl+F to the phrase “This brings us to our last character, Xandra” to skip it. We good? Everybody continuing to read wants to see this? Okay.

BRYNN TOTALLY PEGS HANSO. Like, I don’t have any sources, but by this point in the presentation, I hope I’ve established myself as an expert authority, and I hope you just believe me. She has the sword, in this relationship. Both literally and metaphorically. She pegs him and her strap is huge.

This brings us to our last character, Xandra.

Xandra is a Xweetok and also a magic scholar. She studied under Fyora, the Faerie Queen, and helps Hanso and Brynn with their investigation of the faeries’ petrification. She’s a lesbian because I say so, but uhhhhhh…

She’s also evil. Towards the end of “The Faeries’ Ruin” it was revealed that Xandra was the one who petrified the faeries all along. So yeah, she’s evil, buuuuuuut she’s super queer about it. How? Well, the answer lies in her motives.

The reason why she petrified the faeries was because she wanted to start a new Neopia without them. She believed that the faeries were hoarding power instead of using it to truly help Neopians. She actively wanted to destroy not just the faeries, but a symbol of power and control that arguably rules the world she lives in. She criticizes against that which controls the social expectations, and this criticism and questioning benefits the marginalized, the queered from the norm. Her intention was to create a kind of utopia free from a governing body that holds all the power. That’s pretty damn queer.

Honestly, I’m a little pissed she was branded as evil for this, but it was revealed that when the faeries were petrified, their good magic was gone and left Neopia vulnerable to evil magic shadows and Xandra didn’t really care. So uh, she had good and radical queer motives, but she went a little bonkers with power. I still love her though. 

So, Xandra is pretty awesome, I hope she gets therapy then attends a Pride protest. She would totally be there reminding everybody that Pride started with riots. Also she loves women.

Thank you all.

(Read my other off the shits analysis essays at actualbird.tumblr.com/tagged/nobody-asked-but! If you have a request or suggestion for an off the shits analysis essay I can write, send me an ask!)

#nobody asked but #yeah. yeah this is what i do for fun

[stylishanachronism]

So it is in fact Watcher Wednesday, I have a headache, the neighbors are still firing off fireworks and setting off all the car alarms on that side of the street, here’s a sliver of an essay about Pillars of Eternity and sheep.

So if you’ve been following along at all, you’ll know I have a dearly held headcanon that Edér, outside of seasonal agricultural work, supports himself by knitting elaborate ring lace shawls (no seriously what the fuck is he supposed to be doing all year Obsidian answer me who is making his socks), because canonically most of the Dyrwood’s production is tied up in fancy wool and fancy timber. More specifically, per the guidebook, “Wyr (“wire” - Aedyran) wool, gal glas (“green thorn” - Glanfathan) timber, Glanfathan deer hide, tin, lead, iron, copper.” (PGB1, pg 48), and it’s telling that the particular types of wool and timber are specified, as they aren’t for any other country(1). This is surprisingly well supported in game, between the set dressing in the Gift, the shipwreck scavengers beneath the bridge, and Dyrford’s main industry, namely tanning and dyework, as well as the lack of either crop industry on a wide scale, or food prepared for shipment in the Gift. (It does raise the question of ‘where are all the sheep’, but considering Obsidian knows nothing about textiles and the fact adding Yet Another model probably wasn’t the best use of their time, I’m cross about it but I’ll excuse it)

Fun fact: shipping roving is a waste of everybody’s time. Shipping thread on a scale that would enable somebody else to turn it into cloth is less so, but it’s significantly more expensive. Cloth takes up a lot less space than either option (especially roving), and is a lot harder to damage/a lot easier to protect during the process, especially since there’s a smidge more evidence(2) that wyr wool is a fine, light, long fiber wool, and therefore prone to matting in its base state.

This is not in the game at all, and barely barely barely in the guidebooks, but that set of facts means the Dyrwood is probably known for its weavers and knitters, and they probably import a lot more dye than even Aedyr, who are implicated to buy dyed in the wool textiles(3), which leads to the idea that the Dyrwood and Readceras have very strong economic reasons to get over their differences, (which is openly canon, but without explanation) and in the meantime Stalwart’s smuggling business? Almost entirely dye into the Dyrwood. The same economic pressure would explain why Aedyr was so eager to go back to trading with them, instead of being deeply pissy about dealing with a ‘failed’ colony, as they are with Readceras.(4)

On another tack, this takes everything about the Pearl Bluffs and makes it actually relevant to Defiance Bay as a city, because shelling out municipal funds on adventurers because one of your priestesses is having bad symbolic dreams is... a little sketchy, considering the state of the city, but if hiring those adventurers also gets rid of a major predator in the closest accessible good grazing land? Sheep are much more valuable than dreams, and that’s a reasonable expense. (It also explains why there’s absolutely nothing there, because local grazing land > mildly inaccessible but well placed military infastructure, because if I was worried about invasions by sea (which Defiance Bay canonically is), having some sort of lookout on the cliffs above the port would be a good idea, but not if it would hurt the city’s main industry.)(5)

Circling back around to the lack of crop industry, I know mechanically nobody wanted to animate Yet Another field of wheat (or what have you. There’s a lot of options there but they didn’t put it in so We Just Don’t Know(6)), and so it’s not that they don’t exist it’s that they aren’t pictured, just like the dozens and dozens of little towns that ought to be peppered across the place, which must exist but aren’t pictured (or named), but like... I desperately want to know what Obsidian thought everybody was doing all year, and where they were supposed to be living. (Let’s face it, I want a real map, with county lines and everything.) I am, obviously, proposing that in addition to the many many necessary industries (coopers! more blacksmiths! every single citizen from the age of being able to hold a pair of needles knits and spins so they don’t go naked! glaizers! lumberjacks! carpenters! butchers! I could go on!), that pretty much everybody is involved in some sort of fiber production, mostly wool but linen as well (preparing flax is No Joke), or otherwise dye preparation in some form or other, but like... what did Obsidian think. Where are the sheep?

Footnotes:

1: Per the guidebook: Readceras produces “Vorlas (purple dye), corn, corn flour, wool, cotton (minimal), lumber“ (pg 50), the Republics “Iron, copper, silver, glassworks, ships, spices, clocks, and astronomical equipment” (pg 52), Aedyr “Iron, fine steel, cotton, dyes, lumber (a major export of many varieties), spices” (pg 54), and Eir Glanfath “Gal glas (“green thorn” - Glanfathan) timber, Glanfathan deer hide, gold, adra shell (the odd shell material found in Engwithan ruins), rare fungi“ (pg 57) even though their exporting adra makes zero goddamned sense. No other countries/cultures have listed products, though Deadfire made a good effort at showing the exports of individual cities in the Deadfire. I’m not citing it because I’m too lazy to go copy all that shit down by hand, though.

2: The evidence on wyr wool is, very basically, it’s either a long fiber wool (wire like, able to be drawn very fine), or a short fiber wool (wiry, coarse). Long fiber wool is more desirable, and more likely to be specified out on a consumer level, versus a more ordinary short fiber wool, where knowing the provenance really wouldn’t change much. Long fiber is also a much lighter wool, the sheep more delicate (not by much, but still), and the Dyrwood’s climate as shown doesn’t particularly require a hardier sheep. Without actual sheep to look at, or somebody on staff with enough textile knowledge to incorporate said knowledge literally anywhere, there’s not a ton of evidence either way, but I have my biases, and finer wool suits them so that’s the argument I’m making.

3: “Aedyran clothing is known for being relatively simple in construction and often using large, colorful striped or checkered patterns for accents.” (pg 54) Trying to dye stripes is a misery. Trying to dye checks is worse. Weaving stripes or checks, on the other hand, is very, very easy, but requires you to dye the thread before it’s processed.

4: I would cite the guidebooks here, but since they never actually come out and say ‘there was five years of famine and it was not great’, I can’t, but uh, there was (at least) five years of famine and it was not great. A fraction of the population wandered off to make candles in sufficient quantities that they’re a minor Dyrwodian import (”Many a Dyrwoodan lord who illuminated their keep (and cursed all Readcerans) unknowingly did so by the light of Eothasian candles.” (PGB2, pg 81), in reference to The Bright Shephards, said fraction with the candles), and another went to the Deadfire, where they were delighted to finally be successful farmers (”To the delight of these wayward pilgrims, their crops took to Deadfire soil better than they had in Readceras,” (pg 80), in reference to the Children of the Dawnstars), even though they... don’t actually grow anything in common with Readceras, and meanwhile Aedyr continued to be dicks about the whole mess, even as Readceras proper finally got their feet under themselves, and managed to get the Vorlas properly established to the point where it’s their main export. (Look, Vorlas is fantasy indigo, and indigo takes a couple of years to like, not die at the first hint of literally anything going wrong. It’s more finicky than roses, especially since they’re not growing it in a region it’s built for, there’s a reason everything went to shit.)

5: It also explains some of the bounties, because ‘dangerous thing that only bothers *really* stupid travelers’ is a much smaller problem than ‘dangerous thing that bothers fairly defenseless essential livelihoods’. Also mechanically you’re paid for the Caed Nua bounties but like... Caed Nua is setting the bounty? so you aren’t being paid you’re just saving the house a lot of money to get somebody else to do it. You need to defend your sheep as well as your roads, I guess is what I’m saying?

6: Look, someday I will dig through every recipe I can get my hands on, in game or in the cookbook, and come up with a list of things the Dyrwood probably grows for food, but today is not that day, so right now your guess is as good as mine, as long as your guess is ‘not corn’.

#pillars of eternity #hey look it's time for another Terrible Essay #I'm going to be honest this is mostly not about sheep #some of the quotations were lightly edited for punctuation because whoever did the actual editing did a bad job at that part #there is more to this about why Aedyr's dye-focused colonies failed but like that gets into growing regions and shit #the map *still* confuses the shit out of me Obsidian show me your goddamned atlas #we are trying Yet Another method of footnotes let me know if it's working #one of the things I am most cross about in deadfire is that how economic relations shaped up between the dyrwood and readceras #is literally never once mentioned much less expanded on #like tell me about how that developed you spent so much time talking about it in pillars #let me tell you I have never been more vindicated than the fact I looked at the Dyrwood's fashion in Pillars and said NO THANKS #and then Deadfire turned around and went the same general direction I did when they retconned it #gal glas lumber is either some sort of citrus wood or Literally Green #I haven't decided which one I think is more likely/funnier #further agricultural thoughts include: are they raising chickens or doves or both #and where are the orchards and can I reasonably argue about citrus being a thing (the answer is probably no) #WAIT HOLD ON I JUST THOUGHT OF A THING #do you think people in the know refer to ethosians as beekeepers #like the bright shephards are all about bees because candles #so like do you think 'oh don't bother him he keeps bees' #or like 'go tell the bees those fuckers are coming' #is a way of keeping your neighbors safe from the dozens or particularly militant magranites or what have you #it's a good thing I never post fiction because I will call eder a beekeeper and I will confuse everyone including myself later #I'm sorry I have a headache I don't think I'm making much sense #also i think the neighbors are currently playing streetfighter on the giant projector screen right now and I Want to Die it is Very Loud

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #304

“she’s got a hold on me  /  maybe she is just what they want me to be”

How many foreign friends do you have? Only one that I know of that actually immigrated into America in their life. I think. In which countries do they live? She was born in Asia, either China or Japan. What was your dream birthday party as a kid? I either wanted to go to the skating rink or Chuck E. Cheese. Have you ever come up with your own game? As a kid, definitely. Whose hand did you hold last? Probably my niece's or nephew's if they were taking me somewhere. What was the last thing you planted? Habaneros, I think. Do you have a green thumb or are you all thumbs with plants? I don't really try with plants because I'm not interested in the maintenance. What or who was the last thing you gossiped about? Does telling your therapist about another person and what they do to stress you out count? lol Any books on your night stand? Wings of Fire: The Brightest Night. Would you ever consider going vegetarian? I was briefly one, but I had to introduce meat back into my diet because I just hate too many foods needed to keep me healthy without meat. I would love love LOVE to go vegan, but I just can't. When's the last time you helped a senior citizen somehow? Probably holding open a door for someone in a wheelchair. What's the most selfless act you have done? I don't know... Maybe letting my mother use all my Christmas and birthday money (which was a lot) to take care of bills to keep us from being evicted and losing the car. She was going to pay me back, but then cancer happened. Have you ever intentionally fed a house spider? No. What makes you feel lucky? The fact I have a roof over my head, food on the table, access to water... That kind of stuff. Never take it for granted. How many Lidls are there in your town? One. Last time you went to Ikea, what did you buy? I don't believe we've ever bought anything from there? But I wouldn't really know. How do you like your favorite beverage? Really cold in a can, heeeeell yeah. What's your big family secret? We don't really have one. What did you think you were good at, until you saw someone else do it? I remember thinking I was the "gifted" artist in school until I met my acquaintance Cailin in the 5th grade, lol. She is SO talented. What is something nice going on in your life right now? My partial hospitalization program is going well. I'm getting more comfortable with talking via things like Zoom, it's a good opportunity for me to socialize with like-minded people almost every day, and I ADORE one of the teachers so much so that I want him to be my normal therapist. I have never in the entirety of my life felt less judged and more cared for from any therapist before him, and it's almost supernatural how easily this man reads people. You could twitch a certain way and he picks it up. I'm ready for him to teach more of the sessions. What was the pinnacle of wealth to you as a child? The idea of owning one of those toy crane machines, haha. If I saw one in a store, I would like beeeeg for it. I remember I cried once when I came across one I adored, it was just too expensive, lol. I did eventually get a little one, I think. What's something that you hate, but can't live without? My meds. What skill do you not talk about, because you feel it sounds like bragging? I don't really brag about anything I think I'm good at because I feel bad about it and don't wanna emit a "better than you" vibe. Who's the worst person you've encountered on the Internet? Ahhh, a lovely "friend" nicknamed Shakes. God she hated me. If death wasn't a consequence, what would you try? Probably ride a motorcycle. I'm too scared to risk the possibility of crashing, and those wrecks are nasty. What's the dumbest thing you've heard someone say? There's this one video of a TV show host thinking the moon was a planet and it was just- What is the worst smell you can remember? This smell was forever branded into my memory as if it was fuckin trauma. When my late dog Teddy had a massive, infected cyst near his ~you know~ and also wore diapers because of incontinence with his age (also keep in mind he had a UTI we couldn't afford to fix, and that smells bad enough), changing the diaper he would wear overnight could, swear to God, be enough to make you puke. It literally came to a point that I personally could no longer do it. It sounds so so bad and selfish, and it probably is, but Mom had to do it before she left and came home from work; she's way less fazed by stuff like that than me. Yes, when we had the money, we got the cyst removed. What song gets better the louder it gets? Only like, every song I enjoy. The louder the better until it becomes obnoxious to others. What's the biggest inconvenience that does NOT ruin your day? Having to pee at like an unnatural frequency? haha What's something everybody should know how to do? Cook... which I don't know how to do. What is a great movie no one knows about? I'unno. I don't really know the success level of most movies unless you see stuff about it everywhere. What type of person could the world use less of? Rapists, pedophiles, monsters like that. What makes you tingle? I have this odd reaction to rubbing my hand while someone is holding it???? idk why????? What’s the best Wi-Fi name you’ve seen? Oh MAN, I wish I could remember 'em all. I've seen some goodies. What's easy to learn, but hard to master? God, it's pathetic that my immediate response is related to a video game, haha. Then again it's such a common idea that it's basically a meme in the World of Warcraft community. So, playing hunters in the game. They're argued to be one of the - if not the - easiest classes in the game that requires little to no skill, while as a hunter main, I disagree with the second part firmly. I don't know about the other specializations because I don't play them, but at least in beast mastery, it takes focus and thinking ahead to master your rotation for optimal damage and just to generally be a skilled player of the class. Not to mention you need to watch your pet(s), too. What's something you've changed your opinion on? Wow, LOTS. Tons of political ideas, like my stance on gay rights, transgender folks, etc... If you had a refilling bowl, what would you want it to contain? For some reason my mind immediately jumped to fresh strawberries. I'm picky with the firmness of fruit, so I won't eat them if they're older because ew. If your bedroom had three portals to anywhere, where would they lead? I mean this in the least creepy way possible, but Sara's house so we could actually hang out, Dad's house so I could see him more, and then uhhh South Africa to regularly see meerkitties. You can ask any author one question about their story. What do you ask? Oh, I dunno. I've got some for writers of other media, but I guess by "author," you mean this is for books exclusively. If you have caffeine late in the day, does it cause you to struggle with your sleep? Shit, I wouldn't even know because I essentially always have caffeine in my system. I don't believe it affects me. When you struggle to sleep, what do you do instead? Keep trying to sleep, or more common than not, I do exactly what you shouldn't do and get back on the laptop for a while. Who was the last person you spoke to for the first time? How did you come to speak to this person? My most recent therapist in the PHP. I love love love him. The therapists rotate the days they teach, and he was the last one I met. Are there any TV shows from your childhood that you still watch today? I'm not opposed to it if I actually watched television. Do you enjoy buying gifts for other people, or do you never know what to buy them? If I actually have the money to, omg yes. I honestly do think I create or buy very thoughtful gifts, and I just really enjoy reminding other people that I love and think about them. Who were you with the last time you went out for a meal? My sisters, Mom, and I went to the Cheesecake Factory for my birthday dinner. That place has come to oust Olive Garden as my favorite restaurant, haha. What’s the last thing you watched on TV? Is this a programme you watch regularly? I believe it was this amateur cooking show called Nailed It!, I think it was, with my mom when I sat in the living room with her for dinner one night. Do you have a favorite documentary subject (eg. nature, celebrities, history, crime)? Absolutely animals. Does having to wear a mask stop you from doing anything, just because you dislike them or find them uncomfortable? Do not fucking talk to me if you're anti-mask. If I set foot in public, I'm wearing a mask like a goddamn considerate human being. Do you prefer zip-up or overhead hoodies? Overhead. I really dislike the appearance of zippers on them. If you have a yard or garden, how much time do you spend out there? N/A When was the last time someone bought you flowers? What was the occasion? I think it was the first time Tyler came to my house. This was quite a few years ago. When was the last time you stayed overnight away from home? Was this with friends, family or in a hotel somewhere? What was the occasion? Hell, I'm pretty sure I haven't slept over anywhere since the last time I was visiting Sara, which was like, two years ago. What’s your favorite period to learn about in history? What got you interested in this particular era? The Renaissance; I always found it to be an attractive subject, art being in its "glory days" and all. My Art History course in college really hooked me in. What is the smallest thing you lose your temper over instantly? Homophobic bullshit. What's a job that doesn't get enough respect? As others have said before me, teachers might just top the list. The shit they gotta put up with for so little pay... What did you take for granted until you visited another country? I've never left America, so I wouldn't know. Who is your favorite scientist and why? I don't have a favorite; I don't know nearly enough about any. Do you prefer emoticons or emoji? I'm from the emoticons era, so I'm biased, haha. How did you meet your pet? Roman was the kitten of one of my sister's mother-in-law's females. They have quite a cat problem and wanted to adopt the kittens out, and Mom knew I desperately wanted a cat, so there we go. One day when we were over there, she showed me the kittens, and Roman caught my eye instantly with his beautiful blue eyes. Venus, I "met" via the Morph Market, a reptile hub website for selling, as the name implies, reptiles that are generally morphs of their species. I was clicking through the genes, keeping my price ceiling in mind, and really fell in love with champagnes, and I thought Venus in specific was just absolutely beautiful. I officially met her as a little thing mailed to me, and she was and still is just the sweetest. I wanna point out that when I chose Venus, I hadn't the slightest idea that champagnes harbored "the spider gene," as otherwise I would have avoided adopting her and feeding the market. Regardless, I love her to death and wouldn't trade her out. Did/Do you have any PEZ dispensers? I did as a kiddo, yeah. Do you enjoy erotic stories? If so, do you read them or write them? No; they make me really uncomfortable. When writing RP, some scenes can get sexual, but I have my limits for sure and know when to stop writing and just time-skip. If you had to choose, which one would you rather have: a pet or a baby? Keep the baby away from me. Gimme a plains hognose or tarantula, please. ^Why did you choose the one you chose? I don't want kids at all but would love the mentioned animals as pets. Do you live with your parents or on your own/with a partner? I live with my mother. What's the car of your dreams? I don't have a "dream car." Have you ever witnessed something or someone die? Animals, yes. Has anyone ever told you that you snore or talk in your sleep? I don't snore, but I talk a LOT. Do you have any houseplants? No. Are you more on a laptop or a desktop computer? I only have a laptop, and I prefer them for portability's sake. If you could do absolutely anything, what would you like to do the most? Entirely leave behind my anxiety, probably. Or PTSD. Do you think your parents raised you well? Yeah. Dad didn't really take much part in "raising" us/enforcing rules and stuff, but hey, my sisters and I wound up being good people. Do you have a Facebook? Yeah. Do you know any of your neighbors? Definitely not well. We haven't lived here long at all. Does/did any of your relatives have an interesting, nowadays unusual job? I'm sure somebody does. Have you met your ideal partner yet? I think so. Have you had a serious relationship yet? If so, how many? Yeah, two. Do you enjoy books, magazines or comic books the most? Books. Are your parents old-fashioned or up-to-date about certain things? Dad is more old-fashioned I think, while Mom is pretty up-to-date. Do you or did you at some point keep a diary? I very briefly did on a few occasions. I always had a journal I wrote in during all my hospital stays. Have you ever upcycled trash into useful items? I remember I once followed this craft idea on Animal Planet where you turn a milk jug into a bird house. We never got any birds in it, though. Which color Skittle do you like best? The only right answer is red. What’s your favorite element? Of the classic four, fire. If you had your own radio show, what would it be like? YIKES, I don't want one. Don't make me talk in front of (through a radio or not) people. What has been the biggest surprise you’ve ever gotten? An "impossible" breakup over Facebook Messenger lmaoooo. Is there a holiday you can’t stand at all? There aren't any that I "can't stand," but I do hold at least some degree of dislike of ones bastardized by religion. It's disrespectful as fuck. Who is your favorite person in the whole world? My mom. Has there ever been an activity you became obsessed with? I was definitely obsessed with RPing in my early teens. Like, I ALWAYS wanted to be writing it. What has been the strangest place you ran into someone from your past? I can't think of an occurance. What is something people tend to come to you about? Anything related to English and grammar. If applicable, what's the furthest you've traveled because of a hobby? For purely a hobby, definitely not very far, partially because I can't drive or afford travelling via plane or whatever. Do you have souvenirs from other countries? If so, what and from where? N/A What do you do when someone is talking to you about something you don't care about? Pretend to be interested to avoid being rude. Do you have Photoshop installed on your computer? Yeah. Do you put lotion on after you get out of the shower? No, but I need to. Has anyone ever given you a promise ring? No. Do you have any bruises on you? Yeah, on my shin. When getting in Ash's van the other day, I hit it against the thing that helps you step up into the vehicle. Because of my muscle atrophy, I, and I am not kidding, can barely manage to absolutely yank myself up there. And mind you, her van isn't even very high up at all. My legs are just that damn weak. Any changes in appearance lately? Gaining weight is fucking lovely. Who was the last person to call you babe or baby? Probably a gal friend commenting on a selfie or something on Facebook. Do you hate the person you fell hardest for? Sometimes. Do you actually care about other's problems? Probably too much for my own good. Have you ever gotten a teddy bear from someone? Besides my mom, I don't think so.

#survey #surveys #questions #lyrics: ''big bad wolf'' by in this moment

[darkpotatorises]

So i had my first taste of Red Dead Online yesterday. Coming in knowing the experiences other people had with it and having already experienced GTAV Online, I got in with very low expectations. A watered down, mere shell of Single Player experience, A soulless husk with content hidden behind countless hours of grinding or optional paywall. After roughly 12-15 hours of gameplay with huge reservations towards the game, i have discovered that it actually has a potential greater than GTAV  in which i sank hundreds of hours of my life previously, just so i could say that i have self sustaining economy at least in a virtual world and a yacht. Let me start with some pros before dwelling into well known cons. Surprisingly, Western third person open world games are even harder to find than Pirate ones. (I’m looking at you Pirates of the Burning Sea *softly smooches it*) Pirates have been getting some love over the last few years, However Wild west always stayed in the realm of single player games and an occasional First Person Shooter. But we all know FPS’s can’t be immersive or often as vast of content as open world multiplayer games could. (*snickers in ERP tone) Making it a unique game that you can currently grab for aa entry frag of 4.99 euros. The content that it’s providing right now is well worth it, and a good investment considering the price will be rising 5 times. I just hope the content and care for the game rises just as much. On a more subjective note i must say how satisfying killing someone feels... In a game!.. Of course i meant in a game. While the world is devoid of great story and characters, it’s gameplay is still present, making it the only multiplayer shooter i actually enjoy playing with my gamepad. Now i’m gonna make a pretty questionable remark here even to myself as i highly enjoy more linear and story driven single player experience more than Empty huge Open worlds every new yearly Far Cry, Rainbow Six or anything Bethesda’s planning to ruin next, are providing. That being said those same huge storiless open worlds provide you a blank canvass only limited by your own imagination. There are people that you can meet out there in that wide wild west, things that you’re gonna do differently just because someone nudged you to... (*Insert that moment when he cleaned the whole camp full of Lemoyne Raiders only to be noticed by another stranger, who inquisitively and a bit scared asked about what transpired, visibly worried for the departed folk...While explaining him how they were bad men, i noticed they were guarding a lawman tied up and gagged, looking more scared of being noticed than relieved of being saved... I brought his presence to this new passerby, asking him if he might have any idea of what i should do with him? He replied in a manner of telling a short story with a surprising twist... “Well i’d untie him and then i’d blow his brains out”. It was at that moment, the lawman’s fate was sealed. I took my knife out, cut the rope and grabbed the surprised officer in blue that for the first time during the whole ordeal looked relieved for a moment...*The gunshot sound* This wouldn’t be possible in linear handholding experience every mission of single player was.  The NPC wouldn’t be programmed to push you and make decision like that on a whim.  I noticed lately is that any game can be enjoyed as much as you let it entertain you. So instead of getting polarized right from the start by looking into reviews such as this. In a perfect world one should experience the game first, and be the judge of its shortcomings, if he even notices them in the first place. Now lets get into the really gritty business. You get an abysmally low amount of money and gold pieces. Throwing accent on gold pieces as they are the main form of unlocking majority of the content hidden behind roles of: The Collector, Naturalist, Bounty Hunter, Trader and Moonshiner.  You need to pay a hefty amount of hard earned gold to buy any of this roles that you can earn back only by picking Bounty Hunter first as it’s the only role that earns you gold. Picking anything else would set you back to square 0. The system isn’t perfect. Not for the player. There’s a CEO out there laughing every time some poor tortured soul gets bored of grinding and goes for its Debit Card to buy some Gold Bars instead. There’s a positive thing about the value of Gold though, This game has a battle pass that became a staple of every multiplayer game. While it’s usually associated with Free to play games, as one of the sources of the income, It’s getting quite prominent shamelessly in top tier $60 games. Red Dead Online however lets you get the premium content of the Battle Pass for 40 Gold Bars. Now while its very welcome having this option present, It would be even more tolerable with the introduction of more Gold making methods. Which brings me to the state of game it is in now. Anyone who played GTA Online knows how broken the netcode is. RDO is unfortunately the same in that regard. During my 15 hours I have encountered  1 whitescreen glitch, 2 hackers and a lot of empty lobbies for game modes nobody plays. Which is probably because they tried playing it with insufficient amount of people for them to shine through. While some of them could be just pure trash... Like the train chasing, capture the wagon mode that instead working like king of the hill, where everybody is working together to overtake one overpowered player, here while doing that, other players work against each other too... Which makes it god awful considering everybody is spawning on same place near the moving train where it becomes Spawn Kill Simulator. Right now, Read Dead Online is in that stage before even getting its heists. It’s in its infancy. The Dark Age. My hopes are that enough people gets the $6 version of the game (Including those who already bought it once on console and want to secure the future of the game, and any new updates they might be having in store) Cause we all know GTAV is gonna get rere-released for at least 2 more console generations so why not just get it on PC and be done with it. Maybe united under one platform Rockstar finally starts paying attention to it as much as to its older cash cow brother. Recently i had a luck of experiencing tv show called Deadwood. If you’re not particularly into Westerns, but you loved Red Dead Redemption 2, and can’t find anything that fills that void in any other media i highly recommend you trying to get into it as it was the first thing that filled mine. That sounded dirty... Anyhow in that show people aspire to be Prospectors. I think that would be the perfect role for Red Dead Online. You must have encountered a person who struck gold trying to run away from you while hiding his nugget.Just imagine the possibilities....Working your own Mineral Deposit with a chance of Gold. Cause god knows having a working Gold claim would be too good to be true. Mining could either be another thing, we have a shovel, you might as well give us a Pickaxe.  It could be either incorporated in the role of Prospector or its own thing... Miner > Prospector,  Kinda like how Trader and Moonshiner work now.  Another chance of getting gold bars would be by preforming HEISTS. In GTA Online’s Casino Heist, you have a chance of getting more valuable score than cash. Those are Art, Diamonds and GOLD.  You take literal gold bars and put ‘em in your bag. Imagine how awesome would that be in RDO. Making robbing banks, freighters even goddamn trains all the more repeatable and invaluable. These are all dreams in best case scenario whatsoever.  Now excuse me, I gotta go feed my pets, And i might turn this into a Youtube video.

#Red Dead Redemption 2 #Red Dead Online