#me not even knowing all there os of the story: a yes I can write alread no biggie

[phantom-of-the-501st]

Bad Batch Finale Analysis

Spoilers for TBB Season 2

Tagging some people who want to see some longer analyses: @saturn-sends-hugs @phis-writing @eriexplosion @heyclickadee @questforgalas @panther-os

So... that was a lot. We all have many feelings about things and I'm not sure anyone really knows how to express them. I'm not entirely sure where I stand on some things, so I don't totally know how I feel about these episodes overall, but I can say that I liked them. They're not my favourite of the season, but I did still enjoy them (as painful as they were).

I'm going to try and break down some of my thoughts about bits of the episode, but I don't know how coherent this is going to be. I've been jotting things down in my phone when they come to me, so I'm going to attempt putting them in a slightly more organised order, but no promises.

Probably best to get the heavy bit out of the way first.

Is Tech dead?

No. At least, I don't think so and there are a few reasons for this. The first is that we don't see a body and if we've learnt anything from Star Wars, is that no body = don't trust that they're dead. And even if we do see a body, we can't always trust it! (Looking at you Maul). The second is that he was found by Hemlock. Seems a bit suspicious that he happened to be found by the guy who likes experimenting on clones is it not? I'm sure he'd be happy to scoop Tech up and take him to do whatever awful experiments he has planned. Sorry, but the goggles aren't proof that Tech is dead. Hemlock is probably just throwing them out to break the Batch's resolve and put them in a more vulnerable state.

And the final reason is that if he is dead, it's really cheap. We've already discussed how members of the Batch dying this season wouldn't work particularly well narratively. For a death like Kanan's, it happened near the end of the show, where it made sense for his story to end. It doesn't make sense for Tech's to end here. And yes, an argument can be made that death is unforgiving and that so many people die before their time (in fiction and reality) but from a narrative standpoint it doesn't work. It doesn't hold the emotional gut-punch that it should. Yes, we all cried in the moment (and are still crying now) but how many people are angry? How many people find this "death" pointless and inconsequential? How many people think that it fell flat? I said months ago that I wouldn't be happy if all of this development that Tech was getting was just leading to him dying at the end of the season. It's weak storytelling imo. And that's why I think he's not dead. We may not always agree with the direction that writers choose to take characters, but I think that killing Tech here would completely miss the mark and I trust that they wouldn't do that.

Parallels to Echo's "death"

Coming off that point and characters not really being dead, this whole situation with Tech feels very reminiscent of what happens to Echo. A character that sacrificed themselves and was left behind, believed to be dead? If he has been taken by Hemlock and is going to be experimented on, then it really parallels what happened with Echo. And if I'm completely honest, I don't totally know how I feel about this. Yes, I'm happy that it means that there is a good chance that Tech is alive, but I also worry that that narrative is going to start feeling very repetitive.

We've touched on the idea of Crosshair's story paralleling Echo's and how that could lead to some interesting character dynamics. I have always been really interested in exploring that and how it could create an interesting understanding between those to characters. But now having the same happen with Tech? I don't know. Part of me worries that they are at risk of just telling the same story over and over again. It removes the idea of this unique dynamic between Crosshair and Echo. Don't get me wrong, I would love to see Tech and Crosshair having something as personal as this to bond over, but we don't know much about their past yet. I feel like it would've been interesting to explore a connection between those two from their past and let Echo keep this story beat as a way of becoming even more entangled with the Batch. I guess I'm just worried that they are going to make this a connection point between Tech and Crosshair and Echo is going to get sidelined again.

Also, three members (aka 50% of the Bad Batch) having very similar story arcs involving being left, experimented on and then rescued? I don't hate it, but it could get a bit too repetitive for my liking.

Wrecker

Time for some character breakdowns! Oh, Wrecker... I wanna give him a big hug, I really do. Back in TCW, Wrecker was shown to be really close to Crosshair. With the competitions that they had going on, you could tell that there was a strong bond there. And even at the beginning of TBB season 1 when he's hitting Cross with Lula, you can see that close brotherly dynamic. And then all the stuff with Crosshair happened and Wrecker lost that. It would've been a massive blow to suddenly no longer have that presence there. We've seen Wrecker say that he misses Cross, you can hear the heartbreak when he confronts Cross about not trying to come back, and you can hear the hope in his voice when he finds out that Crosshair might have betrayed the Empire. Losing Crosshair was a massive blow, especially for someone who is as emotionally in-tune as Wrecker.

And then season 2. Crosshair isn't there, so we really get to see one his deep connections with another brother: Tech. Him helping Tech at the riot race, him helping Tech during 2x9 even though they had been bickering the whole time, and then him teasing Tech in 2x13. We really got to see the bond between those two this season, which makes it all the more heartbreaking. Wrecker lost Crosshair and then he lost Tech.

And then he lost Omega. We know how close he was with her. He had one of the most prominent connections to her in S1 and even some really sweet moments in season 2. They were incredibly close and now she has been taken as well. Wrecker is having everyone taken away from him and it hurts so much to watch, especially for someone who is as open about their emotions as he is. I just want to give him the biggest hug.

"Yeah. Me too."

And you know what, he probably blames himself as well. He was going to go to grab Tech but it was too unsafe. Tech knew this, that's why he sacrificed himself. But Wrecker was the one to try and grab him and instead he just had to watch his brother fall into the clouds. And then he couldn't protect Omega either. He lost two members of his family in quick succession and he probably blames himself for both of their losses. Everyone does, but with Wrecker especially, he probably believes that he didn't do enough to protect Tech.

Echo

(Fun fact I actually started full on crying while writing this section)

*Deep sigh* Okay. Time to mentally prepare myself for this bit.

Anyone who knows this page will know that I love Echo so much. He is hands down my favourite Batcher and one of my favourite Star Wars characters of all time (along with Rex), so anything sad to do with him is painful to watch. I'm not gonna lie, I think I might actually be handling Tech's "death" better than the scene of Echo alone in the cockpit. I can think of Tech falling and just about hold myself together, but I think about that scene with Echo and it breaks me (although that may also be the denial I am in about Tech).

But enough about my personal feelings on this bit, let's break that scene down.

"I don't enjoy solitude."

Yeah... that somehow hurts even more than it did. He hates being alone and yet instead of going to be with one of the Batchers (e.g. sitting with Wrecker), he chose to go and sit alone on the Marauder. That deep sigh and the despondent look over at the empty chair next to him is one of the hardest things that I have had to watch in this show.

This man has already lost his entire squad. He was there when Droidbait, Cutup and Hevy died. He came back from Skako Minor only to find out that Fives was gone too. He lost the brothers closest to him and now that he's found this second family, he's losing them also. We know how close Echo was with Tech especially. Those two were in sync a lot of the time. We didn't see them together as much this season as we did in season 1, but we have moments like in 2x8 when they are working together to get the information off the Venator. Tech was Echo's partner in crime, much like Fives used to be, and now he's gone as well. As much as I don't want Echo to die, I don't want him to be the last one standing and this is why. Just thinking about how much this must hurt Echo is beyond heartbreaking.

And just because this wasn't sad enough, I'm going to throw another thought out there: Echo feels guilty for not spending more time with the Batch. We don't know for certain, but I definitely wouldn't be surprised if he felt this way. I've spoken before about relating to Echo and seeing a lot of my own feelings reflected in him and this would be one of those moments. I've lost people before who I wish that I had spoken to more. All you can think about is every time that you wish you had just stayed on the phone longer, or said hi when you could, rather than being distracted by other things. Echo probably feels the same way. He spent what was probably over a month with Rex and while we know that it was the right thing for him and the right choice to make, he probably regrets not spending more time with the Batch and with Tech. In that moment, I imagine that he's thinking about many things: Crosshair, Domino Squad, whether he would've been able to spend more time with or even save Fives if he hadn't blown up, and all the time that he spent with Rex that he could've spent with Tech.

Even if you make the right decisions in life, it can still be hard to look back and not regret things. I think that this is one of those things for Echo. He made the right choice in joining the Rebellion but now he's lost Tech and he will never get to spend that time with him again.

Hunter

This is where things might start getting controversial because I seem to disagree with a lot of people about Hunter's reaction to things and by that, I mean that I understand why he reacted the way he did. Now, I want to preface this by saying that me understanding his response doesn't mean that I'm not angry at him on some level ("Understanding you does not mean that I agree with you" *gets sad thinking about tech again*).

I've seen some people saying that Hunter's response was apathetic and out of character for him and I've got to say this... no it wasn't. I find it interesting that a lot of the people that I've seen defending him are (like me) not particularly big Hunter fans. A lot of Hunter stans are going off about how this response doesn't make sense but to me it does. Now this is just speculation, but I wonder how much people's headcanons and perceptions of Hunter started to cloud their idea of who he is as a character. As much as I don't love Hunter, I do recognise the fact that he is a man with a lot of those flaws and those flaws can make him interesting, but I think that some people miss them because they look at him with rose-tinted glasses and see him as the perfect dad. But let's break down why I think Hunter's response makes sense.

I'm not going to lie, when I first heard Hunter say that they were going to get Omega back, my first response was "where was this energy with Crosshair?" and its that response that opens this up for analysis. Hunter wasn't sure if Crosshair needing help was a trap (which I've already said in another post was a valid response), so he was never going to react to Crosshair needing help in the same way as Omega needing it. Yes, it's harsh, but that doubt would've always been there. And Hunter's just lost one of his brothers trying to go back for Crosshair. They have no idea where Hemlock is, they don't actually know what is happening to Crosshair, Hunter has never been 100% certain that the whole situation isn't a trap and now Tech has just died because of it.

Yes, Tech sacrificed himself to not just help the others, but to also help Crosshair, but all that means nothing if they're all dead. Hunter, Omega, Wrecker and Echo just about escaped with their lives and with no information, it didn't seem reasonable to carry on with the mission. They couldn't do it with five of them, how would they manage with four? And you also have to remember that Hunter has a child to worry about. Yes, they could get Crosshair back but that's a very big ask. What happens if another one of them dies? Omega is left alone? All of this needs to be taken into consideration. Making the decision to settle on Pabu was a reasonable choice, even if it hurts to know that Crosshair is going to stay trapped with the Empire.

You can disagree with it, you can be angry at it, you can list all the reasons why Hunter is wrong but you can't ignore all the reasons why Hunter is right either. Like I said, I am also angry at it. But tbf, I think I'm more angry at the situation than I am at Hunter. It took me a few hours to work that out, but I get why Hunter chose what he did. I wanted them to carry on fighting for Crosshair but I also understand why he chose to stay on Pabu. And I also get why he chose to go back for Omega. Yes, she's a child, but he also knows for certain that she is actually in trouble. He could never be sure of that with Crosshair, he knows that Omega is in a situation she didn't choose. It's frustrating, but it makes sense.

And going back to people's perceptions of Hunter, I think some people fail to see that actually, a lot of what Hunter does is with selfish intentions. A lot of it is disguised as things that are for the greater good, and I think he believes that as well, but a lot of his decisions are based on what he feels. Yes, he's the one that is in charge of the squad, but his decisions tend to be more self-centred than some people realise. I think that's why Echo is an interesting addition the the squad. He's not only second in command, but he's also not afraid to push back against Hunter and his decisions; he's more willing to question the sergeant's choices. And I think part of that is from Echo's own stubbornness as well. (Side note: Echo's choices can also be a little self-centred (like when he agrees to going to Coruscant without much discussion) and I acknowledge that). We know that Hunter's choices aren't always what the squad thinks because we see them choosing to vote against his decision in 2x1.

I think that if you really look at Hunter and realise just how flawed he is, and how many of his choices are selfish, it makes sense why he said what he said in this episode. It isn't out of character for him.

However, that's not to say that you can't get angry about it. Hunter's devotion to Omega has caused him to make some weird decisions and at points it can feel like he cares more about her than his brothers. I think a lot of that may be down to the fact that he's never been in this position before and isn't use to what it's like to be a father. Parents can make some odd sacrifices for their children and we may not always agree with them. So while I think it's perfectly reasonable to not like Hunter that much here, I don't think that it's necessarily strange behaviour for him. It's exactly what I'd expect given what we've seen from him up until this point.

Random additional point that I somehow missed: Hunter has now lost half of his squad. Do you realise how much stress that man must be under? He probably feels like a failure, so it makes sense for his initial response to be "let's go and find somewhere safe" and then hitting a breaking point that leads to "we're not losing anyone else" (although that breaking point is also heavily influenced by his selfish thoughts).

Emerie Clone Reveal

Honestly, I don't have a whole lot to say about this bit, just that it kind of fell a bit flat? I have two reasons for why this might be.

We predicted that it would happen. That's not to say that twists like that can't be satisfying, but rather than ending on a shock revelation, it ended on more of a "we know" moment.

I was in such an emotional state over the rest of it that I just didn't care. I had greater concerns at this point so it didn't really hit that hard.

But those are my opinions. I don't know how this scene was for other people, but for me, I don't think it had quite the gravity that they were going for.

Feelings now vs 2x8

This is less of an analysis of the episode itself, but more of a reflection of my own feelings. What surprised me is that even though this episode destroyed me in the moment, I'm weirdly not going through the same "crying every time I think about this episode" moment that I did after episode 8. I really struggle after 2x8. Every time I thought about that final scene I just cried (which led to me trying to pull myself together on the way to lectures before I started sobbing in public). But with the finale... I'm sad but I don't cry about everything? Or at least not the parts that I expected to be in bits over. I can think about Tech falling without bursting into tears, but I think about that 20 second moment with Echo and have to grab the nearest box of tissues.

I think it's because of a mixture of things. One is that I am in denial over Tech's death. I don't believe that he's actually dead and even if I did, then I'd just be more annoyed at weak storytelling than actually being sad about it. Another is that as much as I love Tech, Echo will always mean so much more to me. I connect with Echo on a level that I don't with Tech, so I'm always going to have a stronger emotional reaction to content with him in. I cried so hard when Tech "died" but now I'm having more of a breakdown over Wrecker and Echo's reactions. It's strange, but there are a lot of complicated feelings over this episode.

Summary

...I don't know. There are a lot of thoughts and emotions swirling around with this episode. I do have some criticisms and worries, but I don't think that they're bad episodes. I preferred this season over the last (despite having gripes over the lack of Crosshair and Echo) and I think that the entire team did a really great job.

The ending was always going to be controversial. People have ideas of what they think is going to happen and when that doesn't happen, the default reaction can be "this is bad". I think everyone is just a little bit lost atm, but I'll be interested to see what the consensus is a little bit further down the line. Feelings are very much a mess right now.

But I guess that these are my thoughts for now. Turns out that a lot of my predictions were way off the mark but I'm not mad about it. I'm glad that it didn't go exactly how I expected. I'm a little bit cautious about some story elements moving forward (as mentioned in the rest of the post) but I'm looking forward to where they take this show (preferably more Echo and Cross content).

I've just realised that I didn't say anything about Omega's feelings. Oops. Clearly that's not where my head is at right now.

#feeling many things right now #just in case that wasn't evident from the damn essay that I've just written on the entire thing #I'll probably have more thoughts down the line #and I'll share them when I do #this was a bit rough to get through #mainly because I kept crying over echo #but here are some more in depth thoughts #let me know what you think #especially about some of the more controversial bits of the episodes #we can just all cry together #the bad batch #the bad batch season 2 spoilers #tbb spoilers #the bad batch spoilers #tech #echo #hunter #wrecker #omega

[yourbpdgf]

OOO WOULD A DATING JEFF X READER X EJ POLY HCs BE ALRIGHT?

yes yes yesssss! im gonna have fun w this one! these are just randoms hcs that came to my mind since you didnt specify what you wanted 🤷‍♀️. s/os can be interpreted as a pasta in this seeing as theyre friends with other pastas and are implied to live in slender mansion.

poly jeff tk and eyeless jack hcs!

• you guys whole dynamic is chaos ☠️.

• its literally ej and jeff on your top all the time and you messing w them 😭.

• jeffs not TOO bad hes just a little very jealous...

• like if you and ej even TRY to do something without him hes gonna be bothered. it could literally be something as small as grocery shopping.

• "you guys are going grocery shopping? without me? wow i thought this was a three person relationship, i guess you two dont care about me, huh?"

• he doesnt mean it, hes just really dramatic.

• dont even get me started on when you hang out with jane. hes so jealous. hell do his best to sabotage your day.

• hes ESPECIALLY pissed when ej goes to hang out with liu. hes scared jack will like his brother more than him.

• dw he gets over fast tho just give him a quick hug and kiss.

• now onto our beloved ej.

• jack just has the need to know exactly where the both of you are at all times. like he doesnt care if you do something just you and jeff, he couldnt care less, but what he does need to know is where you are.

• because what happens if someone kidnaps you? what happens if you get lost? what happens if what happened to him happens to you? what if-

• jacks never really been a relationship before so hes extremely paranoid. he just loves the both of you though he doesnt want jeff to know that so much and he cant stand the thought of losing you.

• when jeff doesnt remember to tell ej when hes going on a long mission or something he loses his shit.

• ej may be a sweetheart to you two but when hes mad? hes a fucking demon, literally.

• he does not care about anything. he goes to slenderman demanding to know where jeff is. he interrogates everyone at scalpel point until he finds out.

• and when he does find out? he goes to check and lovingly whoop jeffs ass.

• people get pissed at you and jeff for making them go through jacks wrath. jeff does it on purpose sometimes, just to fw them. you do too your just not as obvious as jeff.

• your a completely different story though.

•if you go somewhere and "forget" to tell ej he will still go bother everyone but when he finds you he doesnt do the same things he does to jeff.

• when ej finds you because he needs to confirm that people werent lying to him about where you are so he'll check everywhere until he finds you hell calm down. he might even be more clingy to make sure hes with you at all times to protect you.

• jeff and ej both are simps for you, too. anything you want them to do? its done. like anything you could ever want is yours.

• liu tries to use this to his advantage and hangs out with ej alot so jeff gets mad. jane does the same with you.

• liu and jane proudly say fuck jeff and that theyre team ej x y/n even though youre all together. they just want jeff to be mad.

• ben and tobi try to get things off of jeff and ej through you. ben'll be like, "heyy y/n! were friends, arent we? you should definetely get jeff to do the dishes for me <3."

• or tobi will say "y...y/n can you as...k jack to do this mi...mission for me?"

• ofc you say no. youre not trying to give your bfs extra work.

• but sometimes you hang out with jane, liu and ej without jeff to get him mad.

• and maybe sometimes youll go to the corner store without ej knowing every once in a while, so he can panic a little.

• overall jeff is kinda jealous, ejs protective and you like messing w them but you all love eachother <3.

im so stuck w my other writings so i just decided to have a little fun and make this. here u go 🤲🏼

masterpost

#jeff the killer x reader #jeff the killer x reader fluff #jeff the killer fluff #eyeless jack x reader #eyeless jack x reader fluff #eyeless jack fluff #jeff x reader #jeff x reader fluff #jeff fluff #ej x reader #ej x reader fluff #ej fluff #jtk x reader #jtk x reader fluff #jtk fluff #fluff #creepypasta x reader #creepypasta x reader fluff #creepypasta fluff

[anklesoraus]

His body

Authors note: this story is kinda corny also I’m in a writers block so this was kinda hard to write…but please give me some requests so I can get out of this poor writers block. Also I had wrote a leorio x male reader story but it completely disappeared…

Warnings: Gn!reader x Portagas d ace, One piece spoilers, rushed, not proofread, no plot, short, poorly written angst

Blood. I saw his blood on my hands, my clothes, I could even smell it. I look only to see my one love laying there lifeless. “Ace..” I mumbled quietly. I get down on my knees as my eyes start to burn from the tears threatening to fall. He can’t die, not now, not ever. I knew this day would come the day he would die, it was for a good cause but still it pains me to know I lost my first love. He was with me during my datk times, even when I lost my grandpa to some pirates. Yes I hate them but Ace…he was different, he showed me a new light.

I stare at the hole in his chest. Empty is how I feel looking at him. I could’ve stopped it but I was to scared, too weak. Why must I be like this? If I wasn’t so weak, so useless, so scared…. I wouldn’t have to see my love on the ground dead. His once warm body now cold. His smiling self now motionless. I already miss him. I miss him so much. I know I can’t bring him back. My tears is just water from my eyes, this is no fairytale, where if we kiss he would come back, no. He’s gone forever, no bringing him back.

I start to think off all the good memories of when he showed me not all pirates are bad, it when I first fell in love with him. “Y/n, please come with me just this once!” Begged ace, for the hundredth time this month. I look over at him with my lips in a thin line, “for the last time, no.” He looked down and frowned a bit. Oh how I hated that face, now I miss it. I sigh and uncross my arms while looking at him, “okay, fine but after this leave me alone” I respond now irritated and upset. He grew excited and quickly grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the docks. “Where we goin’?” I asked trying to keep up with him before falling. “My boat, of course!” Before I could say something else we made it to the docks and stood in front of a rather large ship, “I already hate this.” He laughed and quickly dragged me on the boat. Oh how I miss that laugh with all my being.

I look up at Akainu. I was furious, upset, disappointed. “Father..how could you?!” I stand up and look at him “Must you ruin everything in my life?!” The way I felt, words couldn’t describe it. “Apologies little one but to me it seems your life finds me.” He laughs and walks towards me and looks down at Ace’s body. I know he isn’t sorry, he never is. He wasn’t sorry when he left me. He wasn’t sorry when he hurt me. He wasn’t sorry for any of it. “I hated you, yes but now..I don’t even wish to be related to you. Not by blood, marriage, anything!” I can feel the tear’s still falling but I was also angry.

“I didn’t even confess my love to him…” I turn on my heels and walks towards Luffy. “Are you okay, Luffy?” I asked. “Yeah I’m fine..” he didn’t sound fine. I look and see him looking at Ace, he’s hurting, I know he is. I know the feeling of watching someone you love die in front of you, it’s not the best. “Luffy…” I crouch down to his level and look at him with sympathy. “…it hurts I know but what you shouldn’t do is bottle up your feelings, just let it out….”

Before I knew it Luffy, the happy go lucky person I met had finally broke down and cried. No not just cry he screamed. A rigid sigh left my lips as I pull Luffy into a hug. He grips onto my shirt tightly and cries everything out of him. Even the happiest people feel pain. I look over at Ace’s lifeless body as all you can hear os Luffy’s cries and screams. If I couldn’t be strong for Ace I will be for Luffy and will protect him in Ace’s honor.

#one peice #portgas d ace #x gn reader #light angst #no plot whatsoever #anklesouraus

[platonic-qpr-selfshipping]

okay let me finally show you my updated f/o list!! I am also planning to add some s/i info but tbh i still havent gotten to it cause im procrastinating it while trying to relax doing other stuff klsdksj here it is!! (I am aware that the first photos look weird in phones so pls bare with me and put it in pc mode lmaoo im a carrd super-beginner)

now if you'd let me, Imma talk a bit about the changes just because

I wanted to get a bit more specific mentioning platonic f/os so even if I like many characters in sources like Obey Me, you can now see which characters I think my s/i would be the closest with :D!! I also played a bit with labels ig but I read this fic where Mammon said there was no need "to be anything" as long as we were in peace with each other and I felt that on a spiritual lvl so instead of overthinking how to label f/os sometimes I just put him as unlabeled lol I just love self inserting in his world being really close to him and he's my fav character of the game and all but ig it becomes hard sometimes to try to fit that into something so I said whatever, it's my little self insert world and they can do whatever they want that brings me comfort XD yknow, sometimes partnering concepts just feel off but at the same time I enjoy saying I am a Mammon simp cause I love the character so it's a bit of a mess in my brain sometimes, trying to make both my experience as a player and my s/i's fit for my best comfort

(yes this was another Mammon UR+ I did not get on Nightbringer)

talking about labels, I've decided to put all the Golden Deer as platonic soulmates :D! I think it suits us all and all the unique bonds they form with each other, and I thought that the whole thing of my s/i probably having this huge feeling of admiration and loyalty towards Claude felt better like this somehow, like it's a part of my s/i lore and not so much about what their relationship can be or not? I dont know if this makes sense worded like this but it seems to work out in my head XD I still plan to someday develop my s/i's story a lot so who knows

anyway, FRIENDS AND FAMILY!! I feel like it's pretty obvious that I've started to play Honkai Star Rail because suddenly I got a friend, a brother and a father from there- listen everytime I see the Astral Express Family written in the groupchat I emotionally cry happy tears (also I wouldnt be surprised if i ended up also f/oing Himeko in the future lmao, I love found families can you tell)

from Genshin Impact I've officially added Thoma as a platonic f/o :D!! (my hearts craves to befriend kind characters, yes) I think my Genshin s/i is probably the one with the most lore right now so I'm excited to write about this in the future! well,,,,, actually my Super Mario Bros s/i also has some info around themselves already,,,,,, like would you believe me if I told you I was already making up s/i lore while still watching the movie,,,,, the self-shipper experience huh.....

I love her

and do you know who I also love a lot.....?

those platonic f/os I've been mentioning in some reblogs lately saying I still havent talked about them......?

the dudes that may have taken over my brain recently using the power of friendship....?

yeah

yeah

aren't they the coolest tho

anyway I love them (repeating it as if i hadnt made it clear already) and I had to rewrite part of this cause I accidentally deleted it it so I think I'll finish it here ksdhkjs I believe there is a bit more to see in the carrd though, I'll put it in my pinned post soon :D! now if you'd excuse me imma go consume more hypmic manga as a healing experience, if you've read until here go drink some water, listen to Break The Wall and thank me later

#f/o community #self ship community #self shipping #self ship #f/o #selfship #queerplatonic f/o #platonic f/o #f/o list #all i write is about you #self shipper #self shipping community #selfshipping #self shipping blog #i love the pink aesthetic i may try to also bring it to this blog :D

[le-panda-chocovore]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "le-panda-chocovore "?

Oh I think I can actually answer that without rambling too much !! (<- took an entire week to answer the ask and select the fics, and I commented on each one of them lol) It won't be a Top in order of preference tho, there's no actual classment, it's just the ones I loved the most.

The Way I Behaved - EraserMic (MHA)

This fanfic gave me the inspiration to write my greatest work (still unfinished to this day) and literally changed so many things about me. It also made me discover a whole genre of music that I've never listened to before and with which I am entirely in love now. Prepare to cry tho, because this is deeply heartbreaking. It's a Villain Mic AU where Aizawa was never a teacher. And it is good.

What if Percy did become a God - Percy Jackson and the Olympians (based on the books !!! do not read if you just watched the show !!!)

The title says everything. This is not a happy story, you will cry, I promise. It's short, like a 1k word OS, it's really poetic, it's deep, it's beautiful, and also, it's painful. Humans were never meant to be gods, not even Percy. It's written like a poem, I read it so many times and it hurt me every time.

Demon and Angel Professors - Ineffable Spouses (Good Omens)

Not a fanfiction but a serie of short works about Crowley and Aziraphale and the people around them. A teachers AU very nice to read with many Original Characters (the students) who are all captivating and appreciable. The story is extremely queer-positive and neurodivergent inclusive and physical handicap representative, honestly, you want to read it. There's everything inside it. If you have chronic pain or if you're a closeted queer or even a curious ally who wants to understand their peers, this is what you need. The love is so pure it's overwhelming.

Honor and Vengeance on the High Sea - Zuko (ATLA)

Tbh this deserves to be published, it's a novel itself (I haven't finished it yet). The author reappropriated the Avatar universe to write something completely new. It's an AU where Zuko becomes a Pirate after his banishment and fights against the Fire Nation Navy, and eventually joins the Avatar's team. There's a whole work around internalized homophobia, the discovery of the self, acceptance, injustice, family trauma and everything. Original Characters are cool too. Chapters are long and very, very complete, you can see the author has historical and cultural knowledge.

Strength, the meaning of - Asano Gakuhou (Assassination Classroom)

I can't believe a fanfic about this total asshole made it to my top 10, but it is beautifully written. The progressive mental breakdown of a man who used to stand proud above everyone, the slow fall down to hell without even realizing it. There's also his son's POV here, which is equally beautifully written. I really hate the man and I don't like the fact that the end of AssClass completely disregard the consequences of what happened on the character's mental state, and reading how even him wasn't okay at all is very pleasant to read. That's karma my bitch.

Je suis assis - BokuAka (Haikyuu)

Yeah it's in french and on wattpad. It has been a while since I read it but I still remember the principal. It's a OS anyway so it's not very long (we didn't do that 20k words OS on Wattpad, this madness is only popular on AO3 lol). Since I'm sensitive to everything that is around handicap, it touched me. It ended up being cute and warm. Honestly I was more thinking of another BokuAka fanfiction but I couldn't remember the name nor found it online so I put this one.

25 - Riren (SnK)

Yeah yeah I know, pedo ship etc, but I was 14 and this is a High School AU where they're both 16 so, it's okay I guess. Yes the name of the fanfic is twenty-five. It's in french, it's on wattpad, and there's Eren's POV too. I don't know how I'm supposed to describe it... I think you have to read it, it's not actually strange or weird but, it's a whole experience.

Here there be dragons - Centennial Husbands (the Sandman)

This is the exact definition of love. What is love to me ? This fanfiction. Engagement, devotion, caring, this is it, this fanfic has the meaning of all these words. I had a hard time reading it because I hate ultra-long OS (I need CHAPTERS, give me a BREAK) but it was soooo enjoyable, and I was crying the whole time 'cause it's so pure and beautiful.

Palm to Palm - KaRen (Assassination Classroom)

Yes I am a part of the extremely tiny fandom that ships Karma and Ren (I do ship Karma with multiple people throughout the manga lmao) but only in THIS specific context. And this is beautifully written, I can't stop re-reading it. Also, the name of the ship makes me laugh. Karma and Ren relationship after losing Gakushuu -the boy they both love above everything else- is peak romance.

Le goût du chocolat - L x Light (Death Note)

I honestly don't remember a thing about this fanfiction except a single sentence, but I do know that I totally fell in love with it. It was one of my fave fanfic when I was full active on Wattpad, and I even archived it because I didn't want to lose it. I should read it again now that I found it again.

Alright that's 10 !!! Finally !!

Oh it was so fun to fall back into all the things I read before ! But it was harder than I expected because, well, I only have AO3 for 3 years and I've been on Wattpad for 7 years, but I started reading fanfiction even before that, I just didn't have any account back then. So, I kinda forgot about some of the things I read more than 4 years ago, and I couldn't find the gems I discovered when I was 12. Most of the books that made out to this list are my recent lectures, it's a bit biased I guess.

Anyway, thank you for the ask ! It was fun to analyze all my bookmarks and everything !

#Sorry for taking so many time to answer ! #I hope my english wasn't too bad in this post #when there's just a character's name it means it's not centred on a ship #reading #fanfiction #answering asks #personal rambling #personal sharing #ao3 #wattpad #fanfic readers #list #anon ask #listing #shipping #anime #fandom #manga

[the-cranck-hobbit]

Hangman and Phoenix || Baby On Board Drabbles

Author's note : English is not my first language. This Drabbles belongs to my Baby On Board Univers. 

Pairing : Hangman x Phoenix (Hannix)

Warning : BAD WRITING (but i’m getting better), mention of smut but nothing explicit.  And FLUFF !! A LOT OF FLUFF (you’re welcome). Dad!Hangman (yes it’s a warning, we all know it’s a warning.)

I recommend you read my OS “Baby On Board” before reading this Drabbles or you're gonna miss some information.

“Do you think you could find a babysitter for Friday evening ?” Those were Phoenix’ words. And of course Hangman figured out childcare. Penny and Maverik were more than happy to spend an evening with the ten month old boy. It must be said that JJ was a lovely child and the older couple created a bond with the baby, barely becoming his adoptive grand-parents. 

For the first Hangman took her to an Italian restaurant close to the sea. When he picks her up, he’s got a mind blown. She wore a simple dress but it highlighted her forms. Her dark hair fell on her shoulder and she got light makeup (mascara and red lipstick) that made her look more beautiful than her usual flight suit and hair bun. And she was already gorgeous with her flight suit and hair bun. 

They had a good evening. Talking about everything : work, friends, childhood. Phoenix was the one that talked the most about her childhood and family, but she quickly understood that if Hangman didn’t want to talk to her about it, it was not against her but because he was not ready to share this part of his story with her. 

Phoenix was surprised by the way Hangman was attentive to her, he listened to all her stories about her and her brothers, and asked her questions. But, even if he was more soft than he can be with some random girl in a bar, Hangman was still Hangman and he couldn't help but say a few flirty words there and here. Usually she’d be annoyed by that and she’d shoved him but this night, his seducing words created butterflies on her stomach. 

They got another date and contrary to what she expected, Hangman didn’t try to get invited to her place to spend the night. He hoped to, but he let her decide. He didn’t want to treat her like the other woman : Dinner, Bed, Gone before breakfast. Even if he already served her this menu years before, this time it was different. He realized that she was special to him, maybe the special one. And he wanted to prove it to her. 

For the third date, he proposed to her to come to his place and to cook dinner for her. Phoenix was more happy that she thought of the idea of Hangman cooking for her. “Don’t worry, Rooster can keep JJ overnight.” He told her on the phone while changing JJ’s diaper. “No, it’s fine. I’m okay with JJ being there. If it’s good for you.” Jake’s heart bound on his chest. He was more than good with the idea of spending an evening at home with Phoenix and JJ. He wanted this. But he didn’t dare ask her. He wouldn’t run her away with his new responsibility. 

When she arrived at his place, she was welcomed by Hangman and the little JJ on his arm. They were both well dressed with gel in their hair. As soon as she entered the apartment, Hangman’s mini-me leaned towards her, hands out, silently asking for her to hold him. Jake tenderly reprimanded him. “Hey, hey Buddy ! That’s no way to ask for a lady's attention.” Phoenix smiled and took JJ on her arm. “No problem, you’re still more subtle than your father.” She cooed at him. 

Hangman turned out to be a good cook. Phoenix was impressed to learn that he was doing homemade mash for JJ. The dinner took place in a cheerful atmosphere. JJ was reacting to Jake and Natasha’s chat with his baby’s language and laughter.

After the dinner, Jake excused himself to get JJ ready for bed. Natasha couldn’t help but be curious about seeing Jake taking care of his son. So she stayed at the doorstep of the child room, watching the two Seresin’s boys on their night rooting. Jake puts JJ in pajamas, making funny faces and noises which make the baby laugh. 

For most people it would be weird to see Lieutenant Jake Hangman Seresin, always so clean on himself, impeccably coiffed and dressed, mindful of his image, making faces and weird sounds. But Natasha didn’t want to make fun of him, she only admired this new father taking some time with his son and creating a bond with him.  

When he rose up holding the baby, Jake was surprised to see Natasha looking at them. He didn’t say a word, took a book and sat up in the rocking-chair to read a bedtime story. JJ saw Natasha and held out a tiny hand to her with a little baby noise, asking for her to come and sit up with them. Natasha smiled tenderly, came closer and sat down on the floor against Jake’s legs. 

Once JJ was asleep, Jake and Natasha got out of the room. They looked at eachother. They didn’t need words to explain what happened or what it meant for them. Neither of them were very good with words to express their feelings. 

Slowly Jake came closer to Natasha, she let him come, looking him in the eye. He brushed his fingers against her cheek and laid his hand on her chin. She tiptoed and kissed him. He kissed her back, and she put her hand behind his neck and slipped them into his hair. He made her jump in his arm, she put her legs around his waist and he took her in his bed.

This night, Jake and Natasha didn’t fucked as they already done before. They make love, slowly and tenderly. They weren’t ready to say the three big words out loud, but they said it with gestures. 

Jake woke up in the middle of the night and found the other side of the bed empty. His heart ached as he thought that Natasha left during his sleep, as they usually did before. When they hooked up, they always left each other's place before the other one was awake. But this time, Jake would have liked to wake up next to Natasha, holding her in his arms. 

He decided to check if JJ was still asleep. Nightmares were less frequent since his arrival, but it became a habit for Jake to be sure that his baby boy was asleep. So he got out of the bed, put on just pajama pants and walked towards the room. In the hallway, he saw that the room’s light was turned on and heard a woman’s voice singing a lullaby. 

Jake leaned against the door frame. Natasha was sitting in the rocking chair, wearing his t-shirt, holding JJ in her arms, gently rocking him and singing “My Little Sunshine ''. JJ got his head on Natasha’s chest falling asleep. She didn’t see Jake coming, so he could admire her. She got the most beautiful smile he never saw on her, a true mother-smile. Natasha lifted her head and saw Jake. After being sure JJ was asleep, she put him in his crib. She looked at Jake. “He woke up, so I came to see him.” Jake approached her and kissed her. It was at this moment he knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with this woman. 

During the next month, Natasha was passing so many times at Jake’s place that they decided to move officially together. She became the one to look after JJ when Jake was deployed, if she wasn’t deployed herself. The few times they were deployed simultaneously, it was Penny and Mav that took care of JJ. The older couple proposed themself often to babysit, letting Jake and Natasha spend some time just the two of them. 

Days after days, they created their own little family life and when JJ started talking, his first word was “Daddy” (which made Jake cry) and the second one was “Mama”. Natasha was deployed the first time he said it, and Jake couldn’t wait to FaceTime her and make JJ say this word for her. Because Jake knows that his son told this word to her. When they FaceTime three days after, Jake didn’t need to ask JJ for him to say the word. As soon as he saw Natasha on the screen he smiled at her and screamed a joyful “Mama !” Natasha held back tears during FaceTime, but as soon as she hung out and she was alone, she cried of joy. Even if they didn’t have the same blood, she was JJ’s Mama, he said it. And JJ was Natasha’s Sweet Baby Boy. 

#fanfiction #fanfic #top gun #top gun maverick #jake hangman seresin #natasha phoenix trace #jake seresin #natasha trace #phoenix #hangman #hangman x phoenix #hannix

[short-black-diamond]

Elijah is the simp

"...wait until the author finds motivation to keep writing." HAH real enemy: Motivation

Now have a drink you deserve, I offer *slide over some fresh water*🫵🫶

- 🍰nom

I'm an even bigger simp for him 🍰-nom you have no idea- *takes fresh water from you* mmmmm flllllllavvoorrrrrrrrr<333 Yes my enemy is having no motivation, but what's more frustrating is that I have a story in mind -all perfect, perfect plot and stuff-, but I then also have to write it down. Also I'm going to do it with the reader cooking-it will be essential for the next part which I'll be writing. Anyways-

Part one

Word count: 4.3 k also I didn't proofread

My golden Boy! -> part two!

{ Last time:

You then helped him take his off too. When you were done, you looked into his eyes and you noticed what a beautiful touch of blue they were.

you also noticed his right brow which was shorter than the left. You wanted to know the story behind it. Otherwise, you found it kinda cute...Elijah was actually kinda cute...and handsome-

'Was Elijah always this good-looking...?'

"What I wanted to ask was---why are you fighting, like--wh-what is your reason?!"

"Do you really want to know?", you said. }

But something seemed...off. Why was your tone so...sad? You sighed as you sat down, petting the spot next to you. Elijah sat down quickly. "I suppose Kublai told you a bit about my past?"

"Yeah, he did.", he answered. 'maybe she doesn't want to talk about it!' "ah, but if you don't want to talk about it, then it's fine! Really!"

You looked at him with a relieved expression. "Thanks. It's just..I don't really know you that well, I mean you must be a good person if Kublai hangs out with you, but like--we only know each other since like, seven hours? So...yeah. I don't really feel comfortable about sharing very personal stuff with people I just met... Sorry-"

"Don't apologize! I'm sorry for asking you that! I should've actually waited for that question..hehe."

You grinned and your sharp canines came to view. Gosh, he'd love to get bit- "All good Eli. And now let's go eat something."

Elijah had to shake his head physically to make his pervy thoughts dissappear and earned a confused but also concerned look from you.

...

"Hello, my name is Milana Marinova, and I'm so, so glad to take on this tournament as a special guest!", you cheered into the camera. To the people who didn't know you, you were looking more like a pop star, or an influencer, or just...a model. But to the people who watched your fights, you were a source of inspiration.

Craig Gills, the producer and director of the reality TV show of this tournament, shook your hand briefly and found a cookie in his hand magically. "Oh? How'd you do that?", the bearded man asked as he examined the sweet thing in his hand, the microphone holder and the camera man were staring at him in envy.

You smiled at the man sitting in front of you. "I think that you guys will have trouble with dealing with the fighters this season, so I'd like to take some off that weight off your shoulders in which I will cook you some homemade meals and not unhealthy stuff- if that's alright with you guys, of course."

The staff looked at you happily and Mr. Gills smiled. "Why thank you very much, but will you also cook for the fifteen fighters here as well?", he asked. [Actually, you two should be discussing about your past and what you'd be doing in this tournament, but we'll come to that later.]

"Hmm, I think I can do that, but I'll need to go to the market and stuff -not that it bothers me! I'll be able to make new friends by that!- I just think that it'll be a bit hard taking into account their allergies and intolerances - do you guys have any allergies?"

"Peanuts!", the guy holding the microphone yelled. "Pistachios!", answered the cameraman. [ep. 3] "Mine's just strawberries.", Mr. Gills said calmly, to which you smiled again.

"Alrighty! A big nono for Pea...nuts...Pis....ta....chi...os...and strawberries. Great, now I can make a list- please tell me if you guys would have anything in mind I could cook for you guys, otherwise I'd just cook my traditional food, plus european dishes.", you remarked into your notebook and smiled at the men.

The three smiled right back. Then, Mr. Gills looked at his cards. "Ms. Marinova, would it be okay if I asked you a few questions about your fights? And maybe your connection to Kublai?"

"Why yes of course, Uncle Gills. Go ahead.", you answered and put one leg over the other. Your long hair was open today and you felt cute as well so you chose to wear a light blue dress that went down to the middle of your calves. You also wore high heels. You really didn't look like a fighter, more like a model or actress.

"Okay, ahem. For your information, all the questions I will be asking you about are from your fans, Ms. Marinova."

You giggled. "Ask away."

"Alright. Why did the people in russia give you the name 'dewushka yaga'? What does it mean?", he asked, and you chuckled, drying your wetting eyes.

"Oh my, to have this question as the first? phew, okay. Uncle Gills, do you know baba yaga? A russian fairytale witch who lives in a house which stands on one chicken leg? Where baba -which means grandma witch in russian- is, well, a witch who eats small children who got lost in her forest.

I guess when the people saw me fighting against my opponents with my open hair once and it reminded them of the witch, but I don't know why...I think there's still a video-"

"You mean this one?", Mr. Gills asked as he interrupted you, and you looked to the side where a TV stood. There, you saw yourself beating into your female opponent. You were drilling into her while laughing like the maniac you became when you were in the cage and your hair freed itself at one point, springing in all directions all fuzzy and curly and well, with the lights, your hair, the blood on your face and you laughing all crazy it was no wonder the people called you dewushka yaga.

You were cringing at the video. "That's so embarrassing to look at.", you mumbled and Mr. Gills laughed. "Are you serious? You beat that woman -who was undefeatable before- into a pulp before she could even launch herself at you, Milana! And it also fascinated the fans to get to know you more!"

You sighed and buried your face in your hands. "I know, Sir, but still...I just...I feel sorry for them."

"Oho?" "Wha- No! I didn't mean it in a sarcastic way, I swear! It's just...Somehow, whenever I'm in that cage, something in me switches and I'm no longer Milana Marinova but dewushka yaga. It-it frightens me sometimes. Like, I can't even control it, you know? That cage is like a portal to another world, where I become some sort of--monster, who nearly kills everything that moves.", you said, hugging your arms tightly, wrinkling your pretty sleeves in the process as you looked at the ground in front of you with a troubled expression.

Mr. Gills looked sorry now too. "Oh, I'm sorry. Would you still like to keep going? If you want to, we can talk in private and I can summarise everything later."

"Really?" "Of course, it's the least we can do. But I want pancakes tomorrow morning." "Good thing that I make the best pancakes known to earth!"

And with that, you hugged Mr. Gills [new possible father figure?] goodbye and gave micro- and camera man each a sweet they saw you give Mr. Gills earlier. They thanked you heartily. You left, but not before giving all three of them an autograph.

J.J. came into view and you greeted him politely. "Hello, Mr. Jericho." "hello, Ms. Marinova. Thank you for finally arriving here. I suppose your people have arranged your room now?" "Yes, I'm glad we could afford that nearby hotel. By the way, are you really going to let me fight or did you just invite me for personal reasons?"

Mr. Jericho laughed as he put his hands in his pockets, going outside with you. "Ms. Marinova, do you know how famous you actually are? The fans you have are -and I dare say- crazier than you in the cage, and that's saying a lot."

You chuckled at this. "Still...I...I just can't believe I'm actually here. It just feels so surreal...!"

"Well, it certainly is real [I wish], Ms. Marinova. Even when you lose against your opponent here, the fans will still support you."

You halted abruptly. "You think I'll lose?", and a tick mark appeared on your temple. The older man only shrugged his shoulders at you. "Depends. You might be scary, but do you really think you can hold a cup to my fighters?"

"If you keep talking like that, then you'll make me increase my body count."

"What, you horny?"

"No, I kill."

And with that, you went back, leaving a scared Jericho outside.

...

You were outraged. Not because something happened to Kublai. Or to you. Somebody destroyed -more like tore apart- someting Elijah held close to him.

"Who'd do something like that?!", you yelled as you patted Elijah's back in comfort. His room, which was actually just the fucking cellar with a bed and his bag, filled with tomato cans, had one covered wall. On the wall stood:

"You suck. 8 and 24."

...and a little to the right stood "Can.", for tomato can.

You dashed to the cleaning room to grab cleaning supplies as soon as you saw it, while Elijah looked inside his bag. As you came back, you heard him asking who tore his picture of him and his dad apart and then...you shook. Kublai held you close to him as your eyes were unnaturally wide, your fists turned white, and the handle of the bucket with water you carried folded by how hard you held it.

"Hey, we'll talk to the culprits, Mila. Wanna go outside for a moment?", the mongolese asked as he lay his head on top of yours but you just kep shaking. "If I don't punch something right now, Kublai, then I'll punch someone."

He quickly led you away from the scene and ordered Vasily to clean up this mess. You and Kublai stepped outside where he took you to a big rock which just uselessly stood there as decoration.

"Now, let all your anger out-"

*CRACK*

"-I meant as in 'take a breath'...but breaking that rock is also a solution...How do you feel?"

You were panting as you kept hitting the broken pieces of stone, not answering Kublai, and Kublai watched you with a sad expression. 'I wish she'd forget about that incident...'

It took you some moments to finally register that you were outside, and that it started to rain. You looked up to him. "How...how long have we been here?"

He looked at his watch. "For about ten minutes. Wanna talk or walk?", but upon your unsure looking face, which kept looking between him and the rock and the mansion, he crouched down and picked up the pieces you broke.

"You know, Mila, I'm glad that you have found a new person to care about. And I'm even more glad that it's Elijah. Also...when you're about to fight against either Zach or Ethan...please break their bones for Elijah. And me, of course."

You grinned at him sweetly. "You don't have to tell me that, bro. How about...we pay them a visit?"

And with that, you and Kublai left the from you pulverised rock where it was. The next person who'd see it would be suprised to see something like taht and wonder how it even happened.

...

"Zach!", Elijah yelled as he approached Zach and Ethan playing billard. you and Kublai were to his right, and Vasily and Mario (the one without a right hand/minecraft steve's wardrobe/cool tattoos) on his left.

"Well...if it isn't the bob cyclone of MMA."

"Why the hell were you in my room?!"

zach grinned as he looked at Elijah. "I don't know what-" "Bullshit!"

(the staff would have to cut off all the swearing later.)

Mario raised his voice. "Don't play stupid, zach. I saw you leave Elijah's room earlier."

"Me? I was here, chatting with Ethan and Bokassa about magical horns.", he explained as Ethan snickered. Bokassa corrected him that it was spiritual horns they were talking about and also called him a baboon.

Elijah looked like he could pounce on Zach any second now, but Zach himself didn't pay the russian in fornt of him any mind, too engrossed in guilttripping Mario.

"I'm dissappointed, Mario, I thought we were teammates...", he said, coming a little closer to Mario. "You look right at home with the other guys. I can't help but wonder whose side you're on."

But Mario didn't budge. "Don't get it twisted, Zach. We have the same coach, but we are not teammates."

You were glad that Vasily and Mario had Elijah's back, even when they were not training under the same coach.

However, Elijah took the word again as he walked up to Zach and pointed towards Zach's chest. "Do you know what you just did?"

"No, actually. Fill me in later?"

"You sonofa-"

In less than a second, Ethan grabbed Elijah's arm. You backed away from the wall to walk to to the "Cheetah" (=Ethan's stage name), but Kublai held you back.

"Didn't your mother teach you not to point...? Pretty rude if you ask me." "I guess she had more important things to worry about.", Elijah answered with a frown.

You stared Ethan up and down, but looked at Kublai and stomped a little. He then saw it too. Ethan's houseslippers were covered red. He nodded to you, and you nodded back.

Noone else seemed to have noticed you and Kublai silently conversating, but it was better like that, anyways.

"My issue is with Zach. But don't worry. Your ass whooping is coming soon." 'yes Eli, show 'em who's boss!', you thought, but Elijah looked down on his arm which got--squeezed?!, by Ethan, who loughed like santa (a little).

"Ohoho! We have a shit talker here. I like it!" 'This guy...is really strong!', the russian thought as he glared at Ethan. You were thinking of splitting open his skull, but then Elijah wouldn't get to have that bonus. Ugh, keeping yourself in check used up all your energy on self control.

"Don't fuck our fight up, Elijah, I'm really looking forward to my finish bonus.", then he grinned. "Now be a sport, and wait for your ass kicking...", and Ethan grabbed his arm tighter, "...like the tomato can you are."

Elijah only glared at Ethan with a blank face before yanking his arm back but ready to grab Ethan this time, however, he got held up by V-Cube. "Forget about them, Elijah. Don't get kicked off the show. You can stay in our room until yours is fixed."

You and Jublai stood back as Elijah, Vasily and Mario left the room.

...

Now, Elijah had trouble doing what Mr. Trevor ordered him to do. Weigh-ins were the next day, and Elijah's nerves were on high alert, but he couldn't focus to save his life. Elijah also couldn't fight against you properly. When you pushed him away, he just let himself fall to the ground. You lost it. "Okay that's it! Eli, you, Kublai, match- NOW!", you yelled as you took him by the hand and yanked him up.

He felt like a ragdoll when he flew in the air a little because of the strength you had.

Kublai made himself ready. Mr. Trevor also looked interested. "That's a good idea, Milana. And Elijah, if you can fight one round against Kublai, you can do ten with all the other fighters here."

"Except for me.", you chimed in.

Kublai sneered at you. "Watcha say??" "Remember that time where I beat the crap out of you?"

"...when was that?"

"That time where you woke up all bruised. you didn't even remember who you were going up against and thought it was a mysterious man, but it was actually me."

Kublai looked at you like the time where you told him that Santa was not real. "...What?"

"Do you need a rematch?", you asked, hald deadpanning at him.

"No, you two will not fight against each other. ...if that happens, the mansion might collapse...Now, Elijah and Kublai, get ready to fight."

"Beat his ass!" "Thanks, Milana!" Both men said. You sweatdropped as they looked at each other.

"Of course she'd mean me, Kublai."

"I call bull, she's my sister, after all!"

"Ugh, beat each other!" "Got it!"

"Do you know who'll win?", Mr. Trevor asked you as Elijah and Kublai went into the cage.

"You or me will have to interfere. In the worst case, I'll have to knock Kublai out.", you said in a tone that knew what would happen. The coach looked at you with a concerned face.

As Elijah put on his red headgear, he saw Kublai without one. "Kublai, where's your headgear?", the russian asked as he pointed towards his own head.

Kublai smiled lazily as he anwered. "Don't need one, I'll be just fine."

And for a moment, Elijah just stood there before tossing his headgear out of the ring. It landed right in front of you. Coach Trevor, Elijah and Kublai were in the ring as you sat on one of the many seats and observed the soon-to-be fight.

Elijah said something to which Kublai raised his arms. You locked eyes with Coach Trevor and made a kicking motion with your leg. He nodded while a droplet of sweat flew down the side of his face.

And when he said "GO!", Elijah and Kublai leaped at each other.

[I'm not going to spoil anything more abt their fight]

...

You and Kublai were standing on either side of the door, as you and Kublai glared daggers into Zach and Ethan. You smiled sympathetically, but Kublai was staring at them with a bored face.

You took the first word, addressing Ethan. "You were in it too, weren't you Ethan?", you asked as you smiled at him sadly.

Kublai continued. "Your shoes had drops of tomato paste. You were the one who wrote on Elijah's wall."

Ethan grinned as he glared right back at your best friend. "Well, no shit Sherlock."

You gave him another sad face as you asked him why. "I can understand Zach, but what did Elijah ever do to you?"

Ethan snickered as he walked towards you. He put one hand on the wall next to your head as he leaned down to you. "Listen, doll. There's just some things a man's gotta do. If you're free later, I could tell ya more about it.", the fighter said, smirking down at you.

Meanwhile, Kublai was chuckling as you looked up at him with big, doe eyes. "Doll? Do I look like a doll to you?", you asked with a smile, a sweet little blush making your cheeks rosy.

Ethan blushed a little as well as he answered you with a, "Yes, and a very cute one as well."

You then averted your eyes shyly as you whipped around with your upper body from side to side. "Then...could you do me a favor?"

"Can't promise anything when it comes to fighting that Elijah guy, sweetheart."

Kublai smirked at him mischievously, and Zach sensed danger, but Kublai didn't do a thing.

You giggled as you looked up at him. "Ah, no, that's not what I meant. You know, I've been fighting myself too, Ethan. ...If you look up "dewushka yaga", then videos of me should pop up. Please...if you're free later...could you give me some tips on how to improve my skills?"

Ethan blushed even more when you smiled up at him. "S-sure thing!"

And then you bid a good night, but before that, you turned around. "And Ethan, after you've watched that video, I expect you to come. Let's meet in the kitchen, alright?"

Ethan smirked again. "You can count on me, sweets."

And with that, you and Kublai left. "Damn, you sure about her? She's pretty damn close with Kublai.", Zach said as he thought back to your interaction. Kublai not interfering when Ethan stepped too close to you? There was something foul.

"Nah, I ain't too worried about him."

Ethan plopped down on to a sofa and typed down your stage name.

Then he froze. There were thousands of videos with aa frozen picture of you laughing into the camera lika a maniac, your goth make-up highlighting your crazy-wide smiling face.

The captions were "DEWUSHKA YAGA KILLS OFF UNDEFEATABLE..." "DEWUSHKA YAGA; THE MOST BRUTAL FIGHT..." "WHO IS DEWUSHKA YAGA?!" "DEWUSKA YAGA BEATING ALL HER OPPONENTS TO A..." "WILL ANYBODY EVER DEFEAT DEWUSHKA YAGA?!"

With hesistance, Ethan tapped on the least intimidating-looking video. Big mistake. The video started with you posing in front of the camera, your tight ponytail holding your dark hair in place. Your dark goth outfit did your body pretty much justice and you actually looked rather sexy than intimidating. But then, there was a cutely dressed girl which he knew, that girl could beat many people, after all.

He was immersed into the video that Zach plopped down right next to him to see what he was watching. The recording went on a bit, interviewing before the fight. You grinned into the camera. "She's cute, but I think that after I'm done with her...plastic surgery wouldn't even be able to give her back her looks."

And the cute dressed girl giggled when the interviewer played out your words for her to hear. "Ohhhh, she thinks she's all that! But no, I'll beat that newbie!"

Uh, yeah, no.

You beat her to a pulp. While laughing crazily, you broke her limbs and smashed her head many times into the fighting grounds. BEfore the guards could pull you away from her not moving body, you bashed her face one last time into the ground, and the ground broke.

Ethan had seen enough. He thought back on how he cornered you and how he called you these petnames. Then he thought about you wanting to see him later. Ethan thought about shitting his pants. "Told ya. Something was foul.", Zach whispered as he went to his dorm.

...

[the fight day]

"HeY, gUys.", Elijah greeted Joe, Vasily and Medusa.

"Stop moving around, Elijah.", Kublai grumbled, hyper-fixated on binding his hand neatly and perfectly. Just how you would do it.

"Where's Eva?", Vasily asked as he looked around. "She said she'd bring him a lucky-snack for the fight.", the mongolese answered while Elijah sat shaking in his seat.

Mr. Trevor paced around, mumbling something under his breath.

Joe, being the GSM he was, wanted to mock Elijah. "Hah! He's shitting his-" "He's in high spirits!", the blonde interrupted him, not wanting Elijah to feel any more down than he already was. Joe warned V-Cube to watch his mullet as he got pushed down by his neck by him.

You just came in time. "Okay, sorry for the wait! I had to take it out from yesterday! I'm glad I found a lunchbox last minute!", you exclaimed as you took out a spoon and opened the lunch box. Elijah looked inside of it, and saw a salad. A colourful salad.

He frowned. "What's inside?" "Eggs (Egg white and yolk), Peas, Sasiska (=Sausage), potatoes, carrots, pickles and mayonaise! It's also called-"

"Moscowsky Salat?! You made it?! How?!", Vasily interrupted and already drooled at the cool salad. "By preparing it. And now eat at least a spoon, Eli.", you instructed as you took a small portion and held it in front of his lips.

The dark haired russian blushed, not having expected for you to spoonfeed him, but he didn't complain. He closed his eyes as he took a bite, and he fell in love. "More-" "After you've won."

Elijah looked up to you. "This salad is full, Elijah, and it's still cold. Moscowsky Salat is served best cold, so you better hurry up before it gets warm."

He nodded, determined to win and get another delicious taste of the salad you made. "I will!", and he ran to his bag to get his mouthguard. But he rummaged a little too long. "Blyat! I can't find it! I still can't find my mouthguard!"

'Did I leave it back in my room?!', he thought as he stared at his bag in betrayal. [bro the bag never did anything to you]

All of a sudden, Mr. Trevor seemed to have gotten alive as well, because he spawned next to Elijah and scared the hell out of him. "Who the hell forgets their mouthguard?!", he yelled angrily while Elijah screamed in fear.

You looked at Kublai. "Give him your "watching a fight" mouthguard, Kublai!", you commanded and he fished it out of his pockets as Elijah scolded Mr. Trevor to not scare him like that. Mr. Trevor only looked at him like that😠. [I don't know which other emoji would suit best.]

Kublai told him that he could use his special mouthguard and you sighed. vasily came closer to you and tapped your shoulder as you deadpanned at your "older brother" for telling Elijah and Mr. "Uncle" Trevor about his different mouthguards used for different activities.

"Ah, Vasily, what's up?", you asked as you looked up to him with a smile. Vasily stared at your box, as he fidgeted with his fingers shyly. "C-could I have a bite?"

You grinned, showing your sweet fangs. "I actually packed a few more boxes in case more people wanted to eat."

You internally melted when you gave Vasily a box containing some of your salad with an included spoon to which he showed his most precious and cute smile to you while thanking you. Joe looked interested as well, along with Medusa, but you shook your pointy finger in front of Mullet man. "No-no's for you, cause you bullied Elijah. Here, Sir.", you then smiled at Medusa sweetly, who glowed in excitement. Rumsfeld grumbled under his breath.

"This tastes so good! I haven't had this salad in such a long time!", V-Cube cried, munching away happily as Medusa froze when he tasted the salad. "This tastes incredible...! Do you have more of that?"

You just put your pointy finger on your lips with a smile because of Vasily. He had a shitty diet and if he heard that you had more, then he'd eat it all up, gaining even more weight and you didn't want that. Medusa glanced at him, then nodded in understanding.

---

ALRIGHTY!! I wrote this far, and yeah. I think I'll write more parts of these, but that's it for today. I hope you liked this part, 🍰-nom.

Requests are still open!

Read you in the next post!

#i love you 🍰nom #elijah x reader fluff #elijah zelenoff #the tomato can x reader #the tomato can x male reader #the tomato can webtoon #the tomato can x you #the tomato can #kublai khan x reader #ttc x you #elijah x reader #elijah x y/n #the tomato can fluff #kublai khan #the tomato can elijah #elija zelenoff #please ttc content #ttc #guys please I'm a simp for the mc #like you don't understand #he's a golden boyyyyy #Vasily Vadymovych Vovchanchyn x reader #Vasily Vadymovych Vovchanchyn x you #Vasily Vadymovych Vovchanchyn x female reader #V-Cube x reader

[jellifysh]

Hiiii! I’ve been a more silent reader the past few months bc of some life stuff BUT NOW I AM BACK & U G H.

Let me just compliment you. I’ve been following your works since before GBIST had a fixed updating schedule and now I continue to follow your works and YOU ALWAYS FREAKING DELIVER & SLAY!

I always get so excited to see how you flesh out the characters of everyone, especially right now in RWY.

Right now, I’m specifically suspicious of Hobi bc what beef does he have with mc? Like why is he the grumpiest butt out of everyone? Like I understand they’d see mc as competition to JK & maybe a liability too but she’s been pulling her weight. Is he insecure? Is he just protective? Is he just like sexually frustrated & confused? Like what’s his deal? 😩😭 I’m so excited to see how he’ll eventually fall for mc.

As for Jimin…ahhhh gives me similar vibes to GBIST where he was a tease & pines for a bit before eventually making a move bc he got jealous or smth 😂

🐤 anon

wow you’ve been following for that long 🥺 I’m so thankful,, it’s okay that you’ve been silent I appreciate your support, I know that it takes a lot of courage to interact and every single one of my followers makes me so happy :’) I like fleshing out my characters, it’s so much fun to switch their perspectives and see whats going on in another characters head it can add so much insight to their motivations and stuff,, hoseok in this story is actually very out of my comfort zone to write, he’s very much an experiment for me. when I was deciding on his character I was thinking about how to flip it to make it more interesting, because we’re so used to bubbly kind hoseok and even in GBiST I kinda played with the concept of like, “what if that’s all just an act?” and it was really interesting to write, so this time I thought “what if he just wasn’t nice at all?” and it amplified the other qualities of him we don’t usually see, the stricter, sterner, more suspicious parts that I think would be really interesting to highlight,, however, him being less trusting makes it hard for me to create his relationship w the mc 😭 the only way I can see them bonding is them working closely together to just see, without outside interference, what the other is really like. so I created the mission they’re gonna go on in chapter nine :) so he’s he sees the mc as competition and blames her for Jungkook not wanting to be w them, he is very protective, he might be sexually frustrated lmao the mc is hot and some of the boys are still trying to pretend like they don’t like her,,, and yes, Jimin in this au os kinda similar to gbist Jimin, but that’s just bc I see Jimin as an all or nothing person, like once he wants you, he’ll make it known.

#I talked a lot :) #thanks for the ask! #🐤 anon

[chihirolovebot]

hi!! I just read the new chapter of sleep awake and I'm just like, photosynthesizing?? Because it was so good and it kept me on edge the whole time?? /pos

like I'm in love with how you write the reader because they're so unique and the way they've grown is just incredible. You see them go from not living for themselves *to* finally living for themselves, if that makes sense. It was just so obvious that the reader just needed a certain "push" so that they can grow into their own person and so many people has helped them do that and it's just so sweet to see the reader like make friends with everyone and start living for themselves y'know. I love the reader's friendships with everyone and most importantly Kokichi and the reader's relationship. I love how everyone around them just kinda like sees that something is going on between them especially that one scene where Shuichi finds the reader in the library after the whole korekiyo trial. (sorry just tryna make this spoiler free as best as I can-) I just adore this book sm. The lastest chapter was so nerve racking because I was just like "oh god what if kokichi comes back and sees reader-" but Luckily that didn't happen- I love that the reader also came up with a plan on their own because that's just so girlboss of them. I will admit though that I am very scared about the upcoming trials especially with chapter 4, 5, and 6 because there's just gonna be so much happening and I'm excited to see how the reader is gonna react to it all, especially chapter 4 but man let me tell you how pumped I am for chapter 5 for obvious reasons. I don't know if you plan on changing that trial up but it doesn't matter because it's gonna be so fucking good and like I said before, seeing the reader react to it all is always gonna be on my mind and I can't wait to see how it all ends. I always remember you saying you were gonna change up chapter 6 which is also gonna be in my mind too because that's something that's obviously gonna make me on the edge of my seat. Oh and I can't forget about the aftermath of the game too, that's gonna be fucking exciting to see as well. Anyways this book has made me love Kokichi even more than I already do and now I'm kinda starting to like Kaito more too. Oh and I can't help but think about how Kokichi is feeling as well, especially after korekiyo's trial, we all know Kokichi hates killing but since *Spoilers* the reader did it in self defense you can't exactly blame them, and im sure Kokichi knows that. If the reader didn't fight back they would've been killed and I'm sure that Kokichi wouldn't want that either, which is why his feelings are probably all like "jsjsjfjsjdjcndb" if that makes sense- and the reader is to conflicted about their feelings, not only for Kokichi but also for their whole plan and stuff. My theory is that if everything stays the same in chapter 5, they're gonna finally realize their feelings for Kokichi. (which is ansgty but yolo-) because in the story they get asked if they like Kokichi but you don't see the reader really giving a yes or no answer, which is why I think they're confused, and they also mentioned that they never liked anyone in that way before which is also gonna make you confused once you actually do start catching feelings for a person. I just can't get over how amazingly written they're dynamic is and I can't wait to see more of them together. And writing this while listening to "I won't say I'm in love" is giving me a bit of kokichi x reader vibes-

Anwyays again I'm sorry for ranting again, I'm the one who asked if kokichi was the love interest in the story and that was also the night I spent reading it all which was a very fun way to spend my night. I don't really feel comfortable with turning off anonymous so I was wondering if you do things like *insert emoji* anon like I've seen other blogs do-? I'm still a bit new to Tumblr-

oh wow, thank u so so much. i just. wow. this comment is os long n in depth im gna try to respond to everything u have said!!

the reader in this story is like. unspeakably important to me because in a lot of ways they represent myself and the kind of journey i wish that i could realistically go through. i dont wanna get too deep into it or make it angsty but i will say that a lot of the stuff they struggle w reflects my own state of mind a lot of the time n i justttt. find it very comforting n overwhelming that their struggle resonates with u too. im very glad their journey seemed somewhat poignant to you, because i rly did put a lot of work into make it realistic and cathartic. 

im super super excited for the second half of this story!! i have a fuckton of ideas bouncing around that i really need to nail down and start making a plan that isn't just a skeleton plot but im mainly focused on chapter four for now? i will definitely say that the end of chapter four will be a major turning point for the story, in terms of the reader and their relationships with everybody. and without spoiling anything the end of chapter four and chapter five has the potential to be the darkest the story has ever gone imo? idk if i'm decided on what EXACTLY is going to happen but yeah, it'll be pretty messed up im sure. 

you're pretty spot on with kokichi's feelings for the reader regarding after korekiyo's trial. he's basically in the midst of a major conflict and i guess undergoing the kind of ephiphany he never really had to face in the game? we know that he detests killing and sees it pretty unanimously as indefensible, which IS a fairly naive mindset in the grand scheme of things (which is why i love kaito calling kokichi naive in chapter two and kokichi just being. fucking flabbergasted. because as much as he is smart and perceptive he IS kind of naive in the sense of moral compass). it's also theorised that kokichi let himself die in chapter 5 because he couldn't rly cope with the guilt of what he did to gonta and miu which is maybe something i'm going to touch on a little? idk, some of the brilliance of his character relies on the ambiguity of it. so we will see. 

but pretty much, there was nobody kokichi truly trusted in the real game. shuichi was the closest but even then it couldn't have been worth much, kokichi never went to him for help or told him any of his real plan, his ultimate hamartia and cause of his downfall. BUT of course the reader has become that for him, they are probably the closest he has gotten to trusting anybody in this game and he's shown his hand to them a lot and grown to genuinely care for them, and now they have in his eyes done the worst thing imaginable. so he's in a place of trying to reconcile that i think. i know he's been fairly absent for a couple of chapters but this storyline of how he's feeling will get a lot of clarity pretty soon, i pinky promise! 

obviously i will not comment on chapter five in the interest of spoilers but i can also confirm that reader is also super confused about their own feelings. personally a symptom (???) of my own autism is conflating platonic and romantic feelings. on top of that, it's probably the furthest thing from their mind, plus with how much kokichi puzzles them, PLUS the fact that they have nothing to really compare it to having never liked anybody romantically? yeah it's not looking good brev. 

PLEASE don't apologise for rambling!! i rly thoroughly enjoyed reading this n i've been thinking abt it a lot for the past few days trying to write up an answer to do it justice. i rly hope ur seeing this and that ur having a lovely lovely day!! and also yeah i do emoji anons, the only taken ones I THINK are 🦋 and 🐇 so u can pick anything u like my lovely <33 i hope to see u in my inbox again sometime soon!!

#dear venus. #🏚.sleep awake

[tylindel]

I posted 71 times in 2022

That's 43 more posts than 2021!

5 posts created (7%)

66 posts reblogged (93%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ameba-from-space

@izanae

@fandoms-and-writing-and-stuffs

@shamrockace

@when-no-wings-do-broomsticks

I tagged 53 of my posts in 2022

Only 25% of my posts had no tags

#maribat - 23 posts

#mlb x dc - 13 posts

#miraculous ladybug - 11 posts

#ml - 6 posts

#animals - 5 posts

#damian x marinette - 4 posts

#dick grayson - 4 posts

#chat noir - 4 posts

#marinette x damian - 4 posts

#jasonette - 4 posts

Longest Tag: 90 characters

#but then he’s at home and just gets completely totaled by his army of traumatized children

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

20) What is your favorite thing about writing fanfic? What about writing in general?

I love that a basis is set out about character so I can take them and stick them in whatever and how ever many situations as I want and see what happens.

For writing in general I gotta say I love being able to bring a random thought or feeling to life through stories and share them with others who might feel the same

1 note - Posted October 8, 2022

#4

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

1) fluff

Oh absolutely I love to give hurting characters love which os probably why my second top is…

2) angst

Even if I go in planning only fluff angst in the form of panic attack or grief sneaks in. It allows for the comfort and care from loved ones. I cant commit to just angst though, there is enough sad things in the world lol.

3) songfic

This absolutely, i get most ideas while listening to a song or while thinking of a song. And their are so many good songs out there that can apply (read: Every song is thought out in fic form at some point or another in my brain lol)

4) not beta read

This less so lately. I know how horrible my grammer can be and how easy it is for me to overlook errors if i read and stare at the fic long enough. I am very thankful to have some wonderful writer friends to help me out here.

5 notes - Posted September 17, 2022

#3

2. Go to your AO3 “Works” page, to the sidebar with all the filters, and click the drop-down arrow for “Additional Tags.” What are your top 3-5 most used tags? Do you think they accurately represent your writing habits?

11. Are you partial to a certain character/pairing or are you more equal-opportunity? If you are partial to any character/pairing, why do you think that is?

14. Are there any tropes you would only read if written by a trusted friend or writer?

16. What’s an AU you would love to read (or have read and loved)?

26. Would you rather write a fic that had no dialogue or one that was only dialogue?

31. What’s your ideal fic length to write?

41. Link a fic that made you think, “Wow, I want to write like that.”

45. What’s something you’ve improved on since you started writing fic?

2. Top 4 additional tags:

1) fluff

Oh absolutely I love to give hurting characters love which os probably why my second top is…

2) angst

Even if I go in planning only fluff angst in the form of panic attack or grief sneaks in. It allows for the comfort and care from loved ones. I cant commit to just angst though, there is enough sad things in the world lol.

3) song fic

This absolutely, i get most ideas while listening to a song or while thinking of a song. And their are so many good songs out there that can apply (read: Every song is thought out in fic form at some point or another in my brain lol)

4) not beta read

This less so lately. I know how horrible my grammer can be and how easy it is for me to overlook errors if i read and stare at the fic long enough. I am very thankful to have some wonderful writer friends to help me out here

—————

11. Partial to char pairing: yes I absolutely do. I lean towards Daminette with Jasonette a close second when I’m writing. Reading wise I’m equal opportunity.

As for why, well I think it stems from my love of seeing the bad boy/angry boy softening for sunshine/sweet girl. I love bringing a character with trauma or insecurities together with a partner who will see that and do their best to support and soothe them. All while making sure they feel seen and loved beyond imagine.

————————

14. Tropes only read if friend writes:

Hmm probably gender swaps. Nothing really against it It just does not typically bring me joy *shrug*

Only otherthing i avoid reading unless its by a friend or im in a special mood is true Main Character Death, meaning they dont come back through magic or something.

—————————

16. An AU id love to or have read:

Royalty is always fun, as is fairy tale in that same thread. Vampire is always a reoccurring au/theme I come back to as well. Though i have yet to write a fanfic au with it.

——————-—

26. Only dialog or no dialog?

This ones tough I think no dialog would be easier as you can get what they talk about through descriptions of actions. Although you could set a scene with just dialog….hmm yeah, no dialog for me I struggle with convos in my fics generally.

See the full post

8 notes - Posted September 17, 2022

#2

As best as I can make it, this is how I envision Déjouer from the Maribat fic I am working on rn. I will add a link once I post the first half. Marinette with the Fox Miraculous. https://archiveofourown.org/works/38004349/chapters/94921090

25 notes - Posted March 27, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

Hello tumblr!! I have a question for all the Maribat readers who see this!

*This is not my artwork, I am no way claiming the lovely piece of work. If you enjoy it please go to the Webtoon it is fluffy batfam shenanigans!*

Now that I have got your attention (thank you WFA webtoon) I would love to hear who you consider a maribat author celebrity! For example someone you feel is well known and you remember them or their fics frequently.

Here are mine:

@nightlychaotic / chaotic_immortal

@izanae

@batsandbugs IcedAquarius

@jumpingjoy82

@mochegato

@jinx-jade

@boldlyanxious

@liquid-luck-00

@mysnis

AbyssalGuardian

@newdog14

Newsie

Just to name a few of the many many amazing authors out there. Please comment those that you feel are celebrities and share with others so they can also add their thoughts.

106 notes - Posted April 3, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

#tumblr2022 #year in review #my 2022 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

[djino04]

Injury

Author note : Don’t hesitate to ask requests in comments and I will try to write a minimum of three sentences OS. It’s a challenging experience for me, because English is not my native language. Thanks to @theyhaveacavetroll for the beta

Prompt asked by Broken : “Oh please, I need Silva severly hurt and Sky sad and protector”

POV Sky :

This is the first time I'm alone with Silva, outside of Alfea, since his release from prison. I don't know what to say to him and obviously he doesn't either. In the past, the silence between us was calm and almost comforting, now every second is a torment... I regret having said yes when he offered me to come with him to his father's cabin. Anyway, I didn't want to say yes to him but Aunt Farah convinced me to do it, telling me that it would be good for both of us and here we are in this old hunting cabin, while the wind starts to blow outside. I sigh for the umpteenth time, getting another glare from Silva, but I don't care anymore. If he's not happy, he shouldn't have asked me to come... And he shouldn't have lied to me all my life... Andreas was a great hero blah blah blah, your father would have been proud of you, blah blah. Andreas mostly followed a psychopath, abandoned me for 16 years and replaced me with Beatrix. He was a ba... a creep. I glance at Silva, as if he's going to chastise me for thinking of a swear word. But of course, he keeps his nose in a book he found in the library. 

I sigh again and it's obviously too for Silva because he gets up from his seat on an old chair and he grabs his coat: 

"I'm going to get some wood. I'll be back in five minutes. Don't go out. The wind is picking up and it isn’t the time to get lost in the woods."

I immediately retort: 

"It happened once and I was 14... Why do you speak about it every time?!"

Saul gives me one last look: 

"It happened one time too many... Get yourself an occupation inside before I get back."

An occupation, an occupation, he has good ones.  There's nothing to do here and there's not even a signal, so I can't speak or chat with Bloom. A little voice in my head tells me that I've been here many times before and that I had no trouble finding something to do. But I wasn't on the outs with Silva, so we had things to do together, like just going for walks or playing darts, sparring, playing board games. He would also tell me stories by the fire or read me a book. 

I get up and start walking around the cabin looking for an activity I can do on my own, but other than reading, I don't see much. Why did I let Aunt Farah talk me into this? 

I knew it was a bad idea. And I have a right to be mad at Silva for lying to me my whole life, right? Well, okay, Aunt Farah was also in cahoots with him and she lied to me too. But she's dead and back so it's a little different and I can't stay mad at her for this reason. 

After a few more minutes of searching, I realize that the 5 minutes are long gone. Silva should have been back about 15 minutes ago. 

I look out the window, trying to see where he is. A bad feeling comes over me. Maybe he needs some space just like me. I guess the last few months haven't been easy for him either... And I certainly didn't help matters by pushing him away every time he tried to approach me. But all he had to do was warn me that my father was a dangerous lunatic instead of presenting him as a hero. 

I waited a few more minutes before deciding to go out. I know Silva is going to give me a hard time when he sees me outside. We'll have one more argument and then that's it. We've been doing this for months anyway. I walk around the cabin because I know the woodshed is on the other side, a little further down the field. It's hidden by shrubs and you can't see it from inside. 

I walk over there at a good pace but I start running the second the shelter is in sight, or at least what's left of it. It looks like it has collapsed. I start calling frantically: 

"Saul?! Saul?! Answer me."

I can’t hear any response. I hope he wasn't in there, but I know in my heart that he is. I continue to call even though the shelter is only a foot away from me. I hear a low moan in response, telling me that at least he is alive. The wind is blowing harder and harder and the rain will soon fall. I kneel down next to the debris and begin to quickly clear it away to try to find Saul. It only takes me a few seconds to spot a piece of cloth and I focus my efforts towards that spot while continuing to speak: 

"Saul, can you hear me?"

He coughs before answering me weakly: 

"Sky?"

"Yes it's me. I'll get you out of here, don't worry."

I manage to clear his body little by little, effectively moving all the pieces of wood. Fortunately for us, none of them are too heavy and none of them impaled Saul. What worries me is that he makes no effort to help me or try to get up, he just lies there. And I understand why when I see the bump and blood on his forehead. I know that head wounds bleed a lot but my heart races again when I see the amount running through his hair and onto the floor. His eyes are also struggling to focus. I murmur more to myself than to him: 

"It's okay Saul, it's okay."

I try to get into soldier mode like Saul taught me. I need to think and not panic. I also know there is a satellite phone in the car in case of trouble, I'll be able to call Aunt Farah, she'll know what to do and she can come quickly with a portal. But that means leaving Saul here alone for a few minutes. 

I look at the blood and suddenly see Andreas' body instead for a few seconds. I shake my head, trying to clear my head. Despite all our conflicts, I can't let my second father die too. I already had to kill the first one, I can't bear to do it again with the second. It's my fault he's lying there, if I hadn't sighed earlier, he wouldn't have gone to get wood then and the shelter would have collapsed without him in it. Even though he lied to me all my life, he was the one who raised me, the one who educated me and most of all the one who loved me... 

He groans again as he tries to stand up. I put a hand on his shoulder to stop him: 

"Stay down, I'll go get help. But please stay down." 

Saul doesn't listen to me and continues his attempts: 

"No...it's too...dangerous...for you..."

I shake my head: 

"I'm just going to the car to get the phone and call Farah. I'll be back in five minutes, I promise. But stay here, and stay awake for me okay? Just stay awake."

The last sentence comes out like a plea but he murmurs okay in response. I leave immediately and run faster than I've ever run. As I head to the car, I make a promise to myself that once he's better, I'll finally have the conversation with Saul that he's been waiting for for months. I will listen this time and do what it takes to repair our relationship.

#ftws #fate winx saga #fate the winx saga #sky of eraklyon #saul silva #fic

[earl-grey-love]

Excuse me this little discussion about what's on my mind. It is relevant to my blog but it's also personal. No content warnings needed. (skip to "long story short" if you want the tldr)

So ever since I started college in January, my ability to be creative went like 📉. Now I get by on basically the bare minimum which is the rare RP or rambled discussion about SIs, plots or developments (mostly in private). This has shown on my blog. I made hardly any meaningful posts about my ships, SIs or F/Os, aside from small stuff like how I wanna snuggle or lil tag rambles about how pretty they are. These are fine, wonderful in fact, but they don't really do much for me. They don't make me feel happy or satisfied.

I've kinda just been feeding off these tidbits for months and months. Heck, there was even a time where I didnt even talk in the tags (really out of character). Due to this I've essentially lost all the spark and passion I had for self shipping. Which is strange because my feelings for my f/os remain as strong as they have always been.

The lack of this spark has made me feel like I should just pack in my blog and move on. And yes, I did try that. But that only made me depressed. It clearly wasn't the answer. So I kinda sat with this "I wanna be here but idk what I'm doing here" feeling for a long time since.

Coupled with this is the feeling that I need to create ship content. I should be writing fics. I should be making moodboards. I should be posting detailed lore/themes/ideas/plots about my ships. I should be making time for my f/os even though I'm exhausted.

I've cried about it actually. It's so frustrating because I know I don't have to make those things to properly love my f/os, but the fact is I really want to make that kind of content. I want to do all those things and more. Yet I've struggled with the fact that I can't because after college and assignments, and social/family time and adult responsibilities, I have basically no energy left. Especially since I'm disabled too and that's a whole ton of energy expended trying to maintain my additional needs too. The only "spare" time I've really had for self shipping is either during self-care moments or right before I go to sleep or get up in the morning. It sucks.

(especially since my f/os help me cope)

I thought I was okay with this. Like it was some small thing that sucked but I could learn to live with. But something changed. I made that stardew profile. It was the first time in a really, really long time where I actually made something purely for myself. And God it felt good. It made me realise how important making things is for me. I need to create to be happy. It's not something I can really go without. I mean I can, but I'll be fucking miserable.

After that I had the spark again. The desire to create and share. I've been coming up with all kinds of stuff that I'd stopped thinking about. Like yesterday in the shower I made up this whole angel themed magical girl purely for fun. Then I wanted to draw her but I didn't have time. I was okay with that though because I had created her anyway and it was fun. I had stopped doing things for fun. I had fallen into the capitalist mindset of productivity. But no more.

Long story short, I really want to create again. I don't have the time or the energy I used to have, so I need to adapt to that. Make smaller but no less special things. Talk about the stuff I usually think isn't worth talking about, like my idea for that stardew character. Maybe I go nowhere with it or nobody cares for it, but at least I have fun.

On top of this I'm also trying to figure out if I actually want to continue academics into University (sociology) or dedicate my life to what I always valued most, art (creative writing degree). Creative writing was my original plan but I thought doing it for a career or studies would sap the passion out of it. Instead I learnt that not being creative saps the passion out of me.

#something something talking about myself is part of my recovery too #I know this is long and a little rambly but it means a lot to me #sunny speaks

[slowdripsunrise]

ok yeah its 4 am idc book review time for the salt grows heavy by cassandra khaw!!! spoilers under the cut :)

KLMELDKFCMLEKRMFLKVMLEKRMVLKERMVKLM AHHGGHGGBHGH 5 stars. off the bat. oughghgg i think this is one of my first 5 star book in a while tbh.... actually idk. whatever.

first off one of my favorite things about this book was the setting. ohhhhh my god the beauty of the taiga the beauty of snow!!!!!!! cold!!!!!!!!!!! like good lord do i hate being cold but new england november is killing me i need 5ft of snow rn or i will die. i think if this story was set in any other environment it wouldn't have hit as hard for me,,, even some place just as harsh and cold wouldn't have worked this specific beauty of the taiga and the snow, the descriptions of the aspens and cedars and pines,,, the desolation it causes to the village around them. the imagery of this basically religious cult of children surrounded by cold and dark forest !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fav. fav ever omg.

the characters..... oggghhh the mermaid and the plague doctor, HER plague doctor, them together was so sos os so sweet. i loved it so much ohhh my god the tenderness there that i could Feel, without any real physical/sexual intimacy. and each of them on their own, the plague doctor's general care for others, for the children even if they was so indifferent about the mass murder of the kingdom lol. the sweetness without ulterior motives, idk. idk why im so endeared by them lmao ive imprinted and yeah again its like 4:30 now so. did i almost cry when they died. yeahhhhhhhh. and the mermaid!!!!!!!! blunt and hungry! loved her i don't know how to articulate my thoughts more than that, nonhuman and shows it and her transformation at the end to more human after the centuries go by and her teeth, her cunning, was so fairy tale like. and her love for her plague doctor, the switch from "the" to "my" OijoIJOIJOIEJJIOREJFIOER. one of my fav scenes of them together was when they were talking to luke and patching him up,,,, ;ladscx,;ls,dc;lms;dc,l;s,dc

ok and so the writing, yes it was a bit dense. did i understand every single word? god no, was it beautiful. yes omfg, i think the voice and the writing perfectly fit and encapsulated the vibe of this story. again it was very fairy tale esque and i really liked it. i don't think i would have liked the writing as much if this was a full length novel, thought. here, it works perfectly and serves its purpose.

the gore and the romance intertwined, these bloody awful evil people and the tender love they have for each other, the understanding,,,,, absolutely loved the horror aspects of this book, how it made the story so incredibly original. i forgot that i was reading a little mermaid retelling and felt like i was reading a brand new myth or fairy tale.

thats all im gonna say right now bc i need to sleep but 5/5 recommend for sure to everypne who thinks they can stomach it this is one of if not my fav of the year bye bye

#the salt grows heavy #thoughts.txt #book review #confession i listened to an orville peck song a bit before i read this book and i a bit associated his voice to the plague doctors lmao #i know their voice is androgynous but i couldn't help the association and also the southern twang was funny. and also the warmth #ifl idk if the mermaid ever described her plague doctors voice as warm but thats how i pictured it lol #for reference i know absolutely nothing about orville peck and have heard maybe 2 of his songs #so the association was moreso from what i picture OPs getup is-mask #wears mostly black? i think? idk

[areyoutheregoditsmejessica]

your post re canonbuddie stans ♥

you liking bucktaylor & megan west ♥♥

you liking bucktalia ♥♥♥

you not liking eddie ♥♥♥♥

you liking marisol ♥♥♥♥♥

your take on canonbuddie overall ♥♥♥♥♥♥

i agree with it all so wholeheartedly!!! buck and eddie literally feel like bros to me. yes, they are besties, and yes, buck has a very lovely bond with chris! but at every single point in the past 6 seasons that could have been used to give Hints to the audience that buck or eddie could ever be romantically involved with a man (or even each other), the show never took it. zero jealousy, zero hesitation to date somebody else, zero insecurity of their "family dynamic" changing when they date again, zero flirtation or appreciative looks or past experiences with men. buck and eddie are both so painfully heterosexual to this day that everybody who honestly thinks of buddie being a feasible option for a canon endgame couple is just delusional to me at this point. and i want to stress that this does not mean that people cannot enjoy and ship buddie to their hearts content! but i need people to fucking learn how to watch and comprehend a narrative realistically because things have gotten so extremely exhausting, even in the tags that are not even meant for buddie! it is everywhere, and i am so so so tired of it.

also, god, i am always so happy whenever i see somebody who enjoys buck and canon buck ships but also shares my disinterest in eddie dfjdsfk; i loved him sm in s2 but that love dwindled more with each new season, s4 and s5 eddie bored me to death. today, i am mostly just indifferent to him. i believe in marisol's power to make his scenes better lmao.

you have any wishes for bucktalia moving forward or some type of scene you'd like to see them in? i personally must see her in lingerie and/or in some really sexy outfit. i just want to stare at them being pretty and cute together, frankly speaking.

legit haven't gotten an anon ask in well over a decade hahaha so this was super neat to open the website and see <3

yes in s2, that character was one of the best male characters i had the pleasure of watching and that dwindled quickly, to the point i wish for the s1 118.

i don't wanna touch on the sexuality of anyone, even fictional characters but the writers have not gone out of their way in anyway to say they aren't straight and i think 7 seasons in, if it was in their plan it would've been done. it's a ryan murphy creation for goodness sake, if he wanted to he would've from ground zero.

i don't have much thought about them yet! they are very aesthetically pleasing. i just want them to stop having buck reinvent himself. we're on buck 345.0 at this point. (i love him and think oliver is GREAT at portraying him, but enough) i was really excited to see where buck and taylor could've gone especially given their history and how we had already been introduced to the audience and had a story independent of his. i also like how she wasn't falling at his feet and also in s4 when he basically used her and she called him out and told him he actually needed to treat her like a friend. why they just decided to take their story in the direction they did, i'll never know. they've written bathena AMAZINGLY and have done a wonderful job with madney, not sure why they aren't doing the same with buck. because after AB, PK, and JLH who came with an already established fanbase, buck/OS seems to be highly popular among the audience and deserves better writing. he was single majority of season 6, so i guess i can't say i wish he was single much longer. i hope natalia becomes a character we can invest in separately from buck. i'm pleased with what very little we've seen so far.

whoever, you are thank you for sending this! and here's to hoping we get season 7 by january 2024.

[carolap53]

New Paradigms TGIF Today God Is First Volume 2 by Os Hillman

04/12/2023

Yes, he has hidden himself among the baggage (1 Sam. 10:22).

If you want to experience something you’ve never done, you must do something you’ve never done. In his book Experiencing God: Knowing and Doing His Will, Henry Blackaby writes, "You cannot go with God and stay where you are."[1]

God often has to radically change us if we are going to fulfill His purposes in our lives. Saul was about to be anointed by Samuel as the first king of Israel. Samuel said to Saul, "The Spirit of the Lord will come upon you in power, and you will prophesy with them; and you will be changed into a different person" (1 Sam. 10:6). Up to this point, Saul had never prophesied or led a group of people. He had also never had to be accountable to a prophet and to God for his every action.

Saul took a big step of faith right away and prophesied with the prophets just as Samuel said he would. How exciting that must have been. Yet, when Samuel called the entire nation of Israel together to announce him as Israel’s first king in history, Saul was nowhere to be found. This part of the story is humorous. Excitement is in the air, but when they call Saul’s name, he doesn’t even come forward. So the people "inquired further of the Lord, ‘Has the man come here yet?’ And the Lord said, ‘Yes, he has hidden himself among the baggage’" (1 Sam. 10:22).

I recall when God began moving me from a career in advertising to a new ministry to men and women in the workplace that involved writing and public speaking. Neither of these were my particular forté. I was forced to do something I had never done.

The story of King Saul should be an encouragement to us all. God continues to pick the foolish things of this world to confound the wise. Your greatest setback can be thinking that there’s no way that God can use "little me." However, the reality is that He can and will, if we respond to the new places He takes us.

[the-cranck-hobbit]

Baby On Board

Author's note : English is not my first langage. My first Top Gun OS ! Yay ! An it’s a Hannix ! Yay x2 !

Pairing : Hangman x Phoenix (Hannix)

Summary : Jake Hangman Seresin has begane to change, but he still has quite a way to go. However he’ll need to change his behavior faster than what he thought, all his life being upside down after a phone call. 

Warning : BAD WRITING (but i’m getting better), mention of drugs, overdose and child neglect. And FLUFF !! A LOT OF FLUFF (you’re welcome). Dad!Hangman (yes it’s a warning, we all know it’s a warning.)

10 month old

Jake Seresin went to the hospital. He still didn’t know what it was about or who it was about. When he gave his name at the reception desk, the nice nurse indicated the… pediatrics service. What the hell was going on ? Up there, he met a doctor that brought him to the “family room”. Jake followed her even if didn’t understand why she thought of him as a family. He didn’t know any kids. She made him sit and he couldn’t handle more. 

“Can you please explain to me what I am doing here? You called me and asked me to come here but no one told me why.” He did his best to stay calm. He can be an asshole sometimes. Well he can be an asshole most of the time but yelling at a doctor was not his type. 

“Mr Seresin, I ask you to come talk about Elena Warren. She is hospitalized here, in intensive care units, due to an overdose.” 

“An overdose ?” asked Jake, frowned. Elena and Jake met about one years and a half years ago. They met at the Hard Deck, she was absolutely gorgeous with this very tiny skirt. He pulled out his famous smirk, bought her some drinks. They finished the night in the Hard Deck bathroom, then in the backseat of his truck, then in her place. The following days, they met again in the Hard Deck, then the bathroom, then the truck, then her place. Always the same script.

It’s true that Elena was not against having fun, dancing, drinking, maybe he saw her smoke a joint once with her friend, but he never guessed that she could fall that bad in the drugs. One day, he flew away on a mission for some months and when he came back to San Diego, there were no more Elena. She was only a booty call, so he didn't really pay attention.

“Is she gonna be fine ?” He asked even if he still didn’t know his role in this story. 

“Yes, her days are not endangered anymore and she will be sent to rehab. But during the cure, her son can’t stay with her.” Jake nodded. “Yes, of course.” Then it hits him. “A son ? Sorry but when we met she didn’t have a child.” 

It was the turn of the nice doctor to frown. And then her eyes wide, as if she finally realized something. She moved on her seat and took a deep breath. 

“Mr. Seresin, I called you because it’s your name that appears in the boy’s file.” Jake still didn’t understand, or he didn’t want to understand so the doctor continued. “You are designated as Jake Junior’s father by Mrs Warren.” 

Jake Junior ? Father ? He ? There must be a mistake, of course there is a mistake. It can be, it could be. “It’s impossible, Elena and I knew each other just for a few days about one and half years ago.” The doctor stayed patient. “And you didn’t do anything that could lead to pregnancy ?”

Flashbacks of the time passing with Elena came back in Jake’s mind. Of course they got sex, a lot but they were carefull and she told him she took the pills. How the hell could this happen ? He's always careful. Even with the woman he knew more than one night. Even with the one he cares about, even with the dark-haired pilot that is haunting his dream. 

The last thing he needed was a kid in his legs. He was a fighter pilot, his job required him to travel a lot, take risks. Nothing good for a kid. And more than that, Jake didn’t want to be a father. He knew he couldn’t be a good father. Not his thing. And with the alcoolic bastard that he got as a father, he didn’t want to take the risk to make the same bullshit to a little human that didn’t ask anything. 

“There must be a mistake.” he mumbled. “Jake Junior…” said the doctor before being interrupted by Jake. “Stop calling him like that.” His tone was strict and his eyes were burning from a melt of anger and fear. 

The doctor continued. “The boy is ten months old. It matches the moment you knew Mrs Warren. I know that it can be very scary for you to learn that you’ve got a child. But we are running out of time. If you don’t bring the child with you until the end of the week, he will be placed in Child Services. Maybe if you see the boy you…” Jake interrupted her again. “I won’t meet this kid. I didn’t want him, I don’t want this kind of responsibility. I’m sorry for Elena, I’m sorry for her son. But you asked the wrong guy.”

Before the doctors could say anything more, Jake stood up and barely ran out of the hospital.

As he drove back home, he couldn’t help but think about Phoenix, hearing her calling him again “Bagman”. Yes, it’s true, he acted as Bagman. Maybe for the first time since the uranium mission. 

And maybe it was the idea of disappointing her that took him awake that night. Or the idea of this little ten-months-old boy that was waiting in a hospital crib. He didn’t ask to have a kid. But the boy didn’t ask to be born from a junkie mother and a dickhead father. 

The boy. The Kid. Jake Junior. Jake sighted and looked at his alarm-clock. 3 a.m. His eyes were full open and his brain was sending him pictures of a blond-haired toddler, in a chaotic foster home, lost and terrified. 

Even if he isn’t a model of generosity, Jake was a man. The kind of man that always takes responsibility for his act. So he needed another opinion on all this mess. The opinion of someone that was almost the opposite of him, but someone he can trust. 

That’s how he found himself calling his wingman in the middle of the night. A rough sleep voice answered him. “It better be a serious Hangman.” Jake sighted. “It’s very serious, Rooster. I need to talk to you.” 

On the other side of the line, Bradley Bradshaw sighted. Jake could hear the sound of a shift and Rooster walking in another room.”You’re not alone ?” Jake asked. “No, I’m not. What’s up, man ?” Good old Rooster. Never hang up on someone. Even if it’s 3 a.m. and he is sleeping in his bed with his new girl.   

Jake took a deep breath. “I’ve got a son.” It was the first time he said it. And it’s like it makes it real. He has a son, with his blood, with his name. “Wait, can you repeat ?” Bradley heard him but he needed Jake to repeat to process the information. And what information. “I’ve got a son, Rooster. A ten-month-old son.” He said it with more assurance and…more fear. It was real. Bradley was now totally awake. Hangman having a son ? Jake fucking Seresin being a father ? “How… Who… What’s happening ?” Too many questions for the early hour. “Do you remember about one and half years ago, before being deployed in Hawaii. This blond woman in the Hard Deck ?” Jake asked. Bradley did his best to remember this time. “The one you fucked in the bathroom of the Hard Deck ? Oh God…” 

Jake told him everything from the call he got in the afternoon to the way he left the Hospital without seeing the boy. He knew he could tell everything to Bradley, how much he had been a dickhead with the doctors. Because Rooster knew him when he was so much worse, because he did so much worse to Rooster. 

Bradley tries to stay calm. Jake was terrified, he could hear it in his voice even if the cocky pilot did his best to keep a cool head. “Ok. Right now, we can’t do anything. You need to process the information and so do I. So try to get some sleep, I’m coming to your place in the morning.” Jake nodded and did as Rooster said. But even if he tried to get some sleep, sleep didn’t want to get him. 

Because another thought came in his mind. Phoenix. Natasha. They have been turning around each other for years. But finally, just before her deployment they decided to stop playing. They finally decided to be honest with their feelings. And even if Jake was not usual with “regular relationship” he was ready to make an exception for her. 

They planned to do the things right when she’ll come back, like dates and everything. But a kid wasn’t part of the plan. How is Nat gonna react ? Will she be okay with starting something (no matter what they’ve got) with a man with a child ?

_________________________

There is no need to say that when the blue Bronco parked in the driveaway, Jake didn't sleep at all. When he opened the door, his Wingman saluted him fast and asked him to come. Jake was about to ask him where he wanted to bring him but Bradley interrupted him. “I want to help you, but you have to listen to me. So just do as I say. Don’t think, just do.” 

Rooster knew how much Hangman was lost by the way he just nodded and followed him. Bradley never saw him like that, the eyes lost in his thought, just following his order without any ego. Yeah, the hour was grave. 

Jake got out of his mind when they parked in front of the hospital. He widened and looked at his friend as if he just betrayed him. “Don’t ask me that, Rooster. I’m not ready. I just can’t.” Jake was totally panicked and Rooster replied with a calm but strict voice. “You have to. This kid needs you. You have to see him. You have to give him a chance.” 

They arrived at the pediatric service, a nurse showed them the room and when they came in, another nurse got the little blond-hair baby in her arm and tried to change the sheets of the crib with her only free hand. 

She looked at them and as soon as she saw Jake, she smiled. “You should be Jake’s daddy ! Perfect timing, can you hold him since I made the bed ?” And without letting him time to answer, she put the baby in the pilot’s arms. Firstly, Jake kept him at arm’s length, and looked at Bradley, terrified. Bradley cought to hide his laugh. It was a thing to see Lieutenant Jake Hangman Seresin being terrified by a baby. He composed himself and whispered “This kid is not radioactive, you can… you know.” By saying that, Bradley mimed him to hold the baby against him. 

Jake carefully took the baby closer and wrapped his arms around the little body. “He is so tiny.” He breathed more for himself than for the others. But the nurse answered. “He is a little underweight. But he is eating well, so we think he's gonna gain weight soon.” 

Jake takes the time to look at his son for the first time. He has the same blond hair as his. But he got the blue eyes of his mother. Even if he wasn’t used to kids, Jake could say that this one was beautiful. Maybe he was thinking that because he was his. 

The kid looked at him and put his tiny hand on Jake's cheek. And something happened. All this bullshit about the instinct of the parents wasn't bullshit after all. Because at this moment, Jake could swear that he wanted to do anything to protect this boy, his son. That the only thing he wanted was to give him a secured place, where he could grow up and be happy. 

Jake looked at Bradley and the older man knew that his idea to bring Jake here worked. He came closer slowly and lent a hand to the boy. When the boy took the man’s finger in his little hand,  Bradley leaned toward the baby and said with a sweet voice. “Hello little J. I’m Rooster. You’re daddy is a little lost for the moment, but don’t worry, he has a thing for being the best in everything.” 

Hangman and Rooster, even if their friendship grew up since the uranium mission, weren’t used to supportive talk and compliment. But this was Rooster’s way to tell Hangman that he can make it work, that he didn’t doubt this. 

Jake held his son against his chest and pecked a sweet kiss at the top of his head. Rooster was right. Hangman always did what it needed to be the best in everything. The best at school, the best in the bed, the best pilot. Now he is gonna be the best father. 

The next step was to… know how to take care of a ten-month-old child. In this area, both of the two pilots were totally unaware. Good for them, they knew someone who knew. 

That is how they find themself drinking at Maverick and Penny's house. The couple were already surprised to see the two younger men coming into their house, but they were absolutely shocked when Jake told them about his son. Penny quickly pulled herself together and offered to the pilot a gentle and reassuring glance. Maverick was still mouth open, Penny elbowed him and the older pilot whispered something that looked like “my worst nightmare”. 

“So the thing is that our dear Hangman here, wants to take his responsibility.” said Rooster, glanced at Jake when he said the pet name. But the cocky pilot was too lost in his thoughts to care about. Seeing that his wingman was not about to talk, Rooster went on. “But he absolutely doesn’t know what to do with a kid. I thought you could help us Penny, because… you know… you’re a mother.”

Penny tried to hide her laugh. "Tell me more. How is he ? What's his name ?" Jake firstly frowned, as if it was asking him to concentrate to remember the little boy. "He is… little… and tiny. But the nurse told us he was gaining some weight. He is blond and his eyes are blue and when he is looking at you it's like he understands everything." More he talked about him, the more his face became soft and light. 

Penny smiled. Ok, maybe Hangman isn’t a lost cause. She starts to tell Jake a list of stuff he will need. Crib, high chair, changing table, stroller (but beware it has to be age-appropriate), baby food jars (but if you can do homemade mashed legume it’s better), diaper (but without parfum or he may have an allergy)... 

Jake interrupted her, overwhelmed by the information. “Stop, stop, stop. Don’t you have a manual ?” Penny wided. “A manual ? Hangman ! He is a baby, not a F-18 ! You know what ? We're gonna buy all this together.” 

And that’s how Jake Hangman Seresin found himself in a baby shop, guided by Penny since Rooster and Maverick were walking somes steps behind, like fish out of the water. Jake has never been so focused since he finished the naval academy. He tried to memorise all the precious information the mother was giving to him. 

Jake was so concerned about welcoming his son in good conditions, that he didn’t take the time to ask himself what he did to deserve their help. Even if they couldn’t give advice to him, Mav and Rooster helped Jake to build the furniture. This building session usually finished with laughter and beer. 

Then it hit him. He just parked in the car park of the hospital. Today, he is going to bring his son back to his place. A baby seat was settled in the back of his truck and Penny was still sitting next to him, she offered to stay the first days at Jake’s place to let him make his mark in this new life. Jake was cocky but not at this point and it was too important to do the things right for JJ. This is the little nickname he found, because he was still not comfortable with the fact that the boy was named "Jake Junior". 

“Thank you.” Jake mumbled. Penny looked at him, she wasn’t sure to have heard right so Jake repeated. “Thank you for helping me with… all this.” Jake firstly hesitates to go on. But there was something in the woman's soft smile that made him feel secure, as if he could open to her his heart without being judged. “I don’t really have someone to turn to. My parents… it’s complicated.” 

Maybe Penny was kind and caring but it was too soon for Jake to talk about them, about the fucking nightmare that his childhood as been. It looked like Penny understood because she didn’t ask for more details. She just answered a soft “you’re welcome” and followed him when he got out of the truck and entered the hospital.

During the past week since the day Rooster dragged Jake to see his son, Jake came a few times, firstly to do all the paperwork necessary to get his son’s custody (and for Godsake there was a lot of paperwork), secondly to see the baby boy before the beginning of this new life together. 

Jake was honest about the fact that he didn’t really plan this kind of life. And it was the first time in his adult life that he put his pride aside and admitted he was a little lost. Once, it made the young nurse smile when she heard him whisper to the kid “don’t worry buddy. I don’t really know what to do but I’m a fast learner. And you and I, we are a team now, right buddy ? We're gonna make it together.” 

The social worker asked them to wait in the hospital cafeteria. He and Penny were drinking a coffee when the woman arrived with a bag on her shoulder and the little boy on her hip. Jake barely jumps from his chair as if it suddenly catches fire. He greeted the social worker then JJ and immediately took him in his arms. This act was weird for him the first time but after a week, it became as natural as breathing.

“Hey buddy, I want you to meet someone.” He turned to Penny, the older woman gently smiled at the boy. “This is Penny, you’ll see she is really cool. She helped me to buy everything you need and she will stay at home some days. You’re okay with that buddy ?” 

Penny came closer and gave him a hand. JJ lends his little hand and catches her finger. He looked in her eyes with this too serious gaze for a 10 month kid, and finally he smiled at her and laughed. It was the first time that Jake heard his son’s laugh and he decided that it’s gonna be his favorite sound ever. 

The social worker gave them a bag that contained a kind of “go back home kit” with diapers and other hygiene products. She said goodbye to JJ and wished him a happy new life.      

_________________________

The first day was easy with Penny at home. But the first night she left them alone Jake was so stressed that he barely slept. He checked every ten minute if JJ was still sleeping comfortably in his crib. 

When Rooster knocked at the door of Jake flat in the morning, he found a Hangman messy and looking drawn. He immediately proposed to his wingman to look after JJ so Jake could take a nap, which Hangman accepted immediately. Not without giving him an army of instructions finishing with a “if something happens to my son while I’m sleeping, I get in my F-18 and I shoot you down.”

When Jake awakened almost one hour later he could hear his son’s laugh in the living room. He found him sitting on the ground playing with a toy plane with Rooster immediating sound of a plane (or trying to). 

It’s been almost two weeks that JJ and Jake lived together. They were still finding their feet together but they became bound together. Jake was enjoying having a little one more than he expected. Everyday JJ was doing something new, that looked so amazing in his father’s eyes. It's almost as if everything goes right. Almost.

Today was the day Phoenix was going back from deployment. Before she left, the two pilots finally confessed their feelings and decided to give them a try when she came back. But before Phoenix left, there wasn’t a 10 month old boy in the equation. 

Hangman was waiting on the dock thinking about the way he could explain to her the situation. He was so lost in thought that he didn’t see all the khaki dress figures get down from the ship. He only saw Phoenix when she was in front of him. For a moment, his breath has been taken away. Even in the khaki of the Navy, Natasha Trace was gorgeous. She looked at him with a smirk. “Hi Bagman.” He smiled back at her. “Hi Nyx.” 

There was this weird moment of the new-maybe-couple where neither of them didn’t know how to greet each other. A hug ? A kiss ? Finally Jake takes Nat’s hand in his and her bag in the other hand and leads her to his car.  

During the drive, Nat talked to him about her mission, telling him what she could. But she could see that he barely listened to her, lost in his mind. But she needed to be sure that she didn’t over-interpret “... and at this moment Bob stripped in front of everybody and we could see his pink lace pants.” Hangman just nodded and Phoenix knew definitely that he didn’t listen to her. "Hey Bagman ! Are you with me ?” Jake shook his head, got out of his thoughts and looked at her. “Sorry Nyx, weeks have been long. What do you think if we stop to eat something ? You should be hungry.” 

Phoenix nodded and they parked in front of the first Dinner. Since they sat down and ordered their food, Natasha begane to be more and more anxious. She was sure that he changed his mind. That he think about it when she was away, perhaps he fucked other woman and realized that he didn’t want to settle down with just a girl and he want to keep his life of cocky and free pilot. 

She couldn’t handle more. “Okay Hangman, tell me the truth. You want to tell me if you changed your mind during my deployment. You can tell me that finally you think that it can’t work. I can hear that.” 

Jake raised his head from his food and widened. “What ? No ! What do you talk about Nyx ? Did you… Did you change your mind ?” Nat looked at him and frowned. “No, but you act weird. As if you’ve got something to tell me. So I thought that you didn’t want to…” Jake interrupted her. “No, absolutely not Natasha. I want to make it work, really but… maybe you will change your mind.” Nat raised an eyebrow and let him continue. Jake sighs and sits at the back of his seat. 

“Since you left, there has been… well there has been a new element that may want you to not be with me. And I’m good with it, I swear I’ll understand, I won’t blame you.” Phoenix rolled her eyes, she never has been a very patient person. “Hangman, please just drop the thing.” 

Jake looked at her and literally… drop the thing. “I’ve got a son.” He waited. Phoenix wided. She was expecting a lot of things. But not this. “A son ? Like a child ? What the..? How..? Who..?” She didn’t even know what information she wanted first. So Jake explained everything to her. The phone call, JJ’s mother overdose, how he called Rooster in the middle of the night, when he met the kid, Penny helping him… He told her everything, he didn’t even hide from her that his first reaction was to run away. “Now, you know everything.” 

Jake let her time to proceed with the information. He saw her, looked away and frowed, thinking about all this story, trying to put all the pieces together. His heart was beating hard in his chest. 

It looked like she was thinking for days when she finally sigh, pinched the bridge of her nose and mumbled “Jake, Jake, Jake… what a mess you got yourself into.” She looked back at him and almost gasped when she saw the smile he had on his face. It was not his famous smirk but a soft and gentle smile. She never saw this kind of look on his face. And it makes him look more handsome as if it was possible. 

“It’s true. It’s a big mess and a great responsibility. But this kid is just… He is just perfect, Nyx ! He is cute and he looks so smart for his age, and he is calm and always smiling. You should hear him laugh, it’s so contagious, you just want to laugh with him !” 

He finally stopped him, scared of Phoenix’ reaction. She couldn’t help but smile at him. His eyes were sparkling and his face lit up when he talked about his son. Before this day, no one could imagine Jake Hangman Seresin being a father. But in this very specific moment, Phoenix could see it. 

But Jake was right. Now it’s not anymore just about the two of them. Now there's a baby in this story. Being involved in a relationship with someone was a thing, being involved in a relationship with someone who got a kid was another thing. And to be honest, Natasha wasn’t sure she was ready for this. 

“I understand now. I’m happy for you, Jake. Really. And I would like to give you an answer now but I need to think about it. It’s a big thing that you just revealed and I want to be sure of me if we… you know… try something.” Jake nodded. It wasn't a ‘no’, but it wasn't a ‘yes’ either. He was willing to give her time to think. To give her this luxury that he didn’t have. 

“Do you mind if… I met him ? Your son, can I meet him ?” Jake looked up and nodded grinning. When Natash saw his eyes lit up she preferred to warn him. “I can promise you anything, ok ?” 

Jake took her in her place so she could get a shower and wear civil clothes. When she got out of the bathroom and entered her living room she found him paces around, whistling while he was texting. She smiled. It was the second time of the day that she discovered a new aspect of Jake. And she really came to like what she saw. 

He was far away from the unbearable, cocky man, always dressed to nines, with a smirk in his face. The Jake walking in her living room, was wearing a grey shirt with dark trousers and a leather jacket. His hair was messy and a shadow of a stubble colored his chin. His smile was genuine and his green eyes were soft.

He looked up at her and smiled at her. Natasha’s heart missed a beat.“Ready, Nyx ?”. She nodded and let him guide her out of her place to his car.  

They’ve been welcomed by Penny who greets Phoenix and hugs Hangman. Even if she knew how much Penny has been present for Jake since the arrival of his kid, Phoenix was surprised by this new warm-bound. “He is in the garden with Pete.” she said with a smile. Hangman guided Phoenix through the house by a light touch in her lower back. 

Just as Penny said, they found Maverick in the garden, a little blond-haired boy in his arms. He showed him a butterfly that immediately flew away. Mav cooed at the boy as he tried to watch the insect with his little hand. 

Phoenix looked at Jake as he came closer and took the boy in his arms. There was something natural in his behaviour that surprised her. “Hey buddy. I’ve got someone to meet you. It’s Natasha. I already talked to you about her. So be gentle, ok ?” The kid listened carefully and nodded seriously, as if it was a very serious affair. Then he smiled and laughed which made his father laugh too. “Of course you’re gonna be gentle, you’re always gentle.” 

Jake came closer to Natasha who stayed in the door, he was walking carefully as if he was afraid to make her run away. Natasha realised that maybe her attitude was showing that. Her body was tense, her arms crossed on her chest and she looked confused. 

It’s not that she wasn’t comfortable with kids, she’s got three older brothers, all of them having kids and she used to spend a lot of time with her nephews and nieces. But Hangman having a kid was always a mystery for her and she’s got this unpleasant feeling of being pushed out into uncharted territory. Not to mention all the maelstrom of feelings she felt grew up in her about this new Jake she discovered. 

She takes a deep breath, tries to relax and smile at the two Seresin. When she greets the boy, Jake comes closer and JJ lends his hand. Natasha gave him her hand but instead of taking the hand she was lending him, JJ leaned more towards her and took a lock of her dark hair in his hand. 

Phoenix tensed, ready to feel her hair being pulled but JJ’s gesture was very soft for a ten month old kid. He looked totally mesmerized by her hair and Phoenix couldn’t help but smile “I know, I know, your father loves them too.” Jake bkushed and Natasha laughed at this vision, then JJ laughed too and it was as if all the previous tension was gone.          

Jake (and JJ in the backseat) rided Natasha home. When they parked in front of her building, Natasha thanked Jake for coming to pick her in the dock, got out of the car, opened the back door of the car, and leaned towards JJ who smiled at her to tell him goodbye. Was there a moment where this kid wasn’t smiling or laughing ? 

She looked at Jake who had turned himself to watch her interact with his son. “Do you think you could find a babysitter for Friday evening ?” He wided, unable to speak before stuttering a “yeah, of course”. She smiled at him “good, come to take me at 9. Don’t hang me out to dry.” She winked at him, straightened up, closed the door and entered the building after waving to Jake from the door. 

Jake grinned. She was giving him a chance. She wanted him. Hangman came back home happier, singing all the way home, dancing in the kitchen while it was cooking under the gaze of his son who was clapping and laughing.        

It tastes like a new start, a new life and a new family. Which was a little miracle for the Seresin's boy  who both had a hard beginning in life. 

_________________________

_________________________

1 year old

All the Dagger squad was reunited in Penny and Maverick’s garden for JJ’s birthday. 

When they first learned about the boy's existence, everyone was surprised and even shocked. But as soon as they met him, they all fell for him. In fact, it wasn’t hard to fall for Jake Seresin Jr. He had a cute face, he was always happy and gentle. He was talking in his baby langage to everybody. 

They make him blow out the single candle in the cake (in fact, it was more Jake and Natasha that blew under the boy's applause) and some little group being formed waiting for the meal to be ready. 

Amelia was baby-sitting Payback’s little girls playing with them. Maverick and Rooster argued next to the barbecue about the right way to grill the meat, soon joined by Veronica, Rooster’s girlfriend. Fanboy, Payback and Harvard were talking about the new pilots they were training. Hondo, Yale and Halo were talking in the other side of the garden. Penny, Fanboy’s girlfriend and Payback’s wife were sitting under a tree, talking. Jake was with Coyote who was cooing to JJ who was still in his father’s arm. 

Bob was sitting separately, observing the crew, smiling. Phoenix joined his WSO. “What’s so funny ?” Bob took a sip of his beer, without releasing his gaze from Hangman, Coyote and JJ. 

“Do you remember when Hangman wanted to find a maining for my call-sign the first time we flew together ?” Phoenix puffed at the memories, Jake was such an asshole at this time. “Yeah, I remember. ‘baby on board’”. Bob looked at his friend and pilot. “Well, I was thinking about how he changed since our mission and more since he’s got JJ. So maybe the only thing that Hangman needed to become a Man was a Bob. A Baby On Board.” Phoenix burst into laughter at her wizzo’s joke.

It was true. Who could guess less than two years ago that Bagman could disappear so fast, giving up his seat to this trustfull and amazing father, friend and lover that was now Jake Seresin. If someone had told her that, she would laugh and say that it would need a miracle. And it has been a miracle. A ten-month-old-miracle. 

#fanfiction #top gun #top gun maverick #jake hangman seresin #natasha phoenix trace #hannix #hangman x phoenix #hangman #phoenix