#not a thing that i associate with joy if you know what i mean | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

loveemagicpeace · 8 months

Text

🌞Sun in Houses🌞

☀️Your sun is your basic personality. It helps you to find your individuality and who you really are. Your sun sign is giving you natural talents. It's your ego. It's your self sense. It represents your will to live. Where you have the sun in your house is where you find light and where you find the most inspiration. And also shows how you can inspire others and help them find the light.

🫧Sun in 1st house- people, for some reason, will always find you to be an inspirational person. They will always somehow find the light in you or something positive about you. You can give off a very positive energy. And even if you are not confident, others will see you as if you are. A lot of inspiration comes through you. And you find a lot of light when you delve deeper into yourself and your personality. And your ego is visible on the outside and you show it that way too. Your will to live shows through what you do.

🍹Sun in 2nd house- you can find your inspiration and satisfaction through money, food, music, luxury. I won't lie, money and expensive things can actually inspire you, and maybe through that you can find hope and the will to live. You can also compete with people who has more money. Or you want to have everything the best or better than others. Since the sun is your ego, you can feed yourself in a way that shows how much money you have or with material things. You show your pride through material things and your value can also be shown in this way (depending on other signs, but sometimes you can feel that you are important or worth something if you have money). People with this placement sometimes find it difficult to find a personality that is not associated with materialism.

🏝️Sun in 3rd house- you find inspiration through books, writing, reading, communication. You want people to see the light through your way of expression. Your ego shows through writing and communication (maybe you always want to have the last word). Your natural talent is to remember a lot, to encourage people with your speech. You can gain a lot of people on social networks. Your will to live is shown through your thinking and thinking. You can be most inspired through your thoughts.

💕Sun in 4th house- You find inspiration in your family or through your family. It can also be a home that you create yourself. Many times you protect the family. You also find the light through family. They become the owner of immovable property, which also adds to the assets that they possess. You do everything to help your friends and you are very supportive for them. In the family, you can often be seen as a person who gives positivity and light - you can also bring the family together. You are very attached to yout home and dream of a beautiful domestic life that you can make for yourself to feel secure. The way you evolve and make things happen later in life would be pretty much connected with your memories.

💜Sun in 5th house- the sun is at home here, so your energy here is very good and positive. You can always find happiness, joy - you know how to create an environment for you that suits you best. You find your motivation and light through your hobbies, joy, playfulness, childhood, romance. You may be very attached to your childhood and want to always have it with you. People always notice you and your talnets too. Usually these people become recognizable. In love with sports and very dramatic. Because they love life and children, they can make the great party organizers for the birthdays of little ones. With this placement, you should be careful not to become too self-absorbed.

🛁Sun in 6th house- you find your light through routine, health, body. It is important that you are connected to your body and that you love yourself the way you are. Because the sun here can become critical of your body. Which means you can find yourself through imperfection. You do things that are healthy for you and your body. At the same time, you can find a lot of good energy and inspiration through animals. Your ego can be noticed many times at work. Maybe it's better if you do something you see passion in it. You can inspire people through a healthy lifestyle or sports.

🧸Sun in 7th house- you find light through the relationships you have with people. It is important for you to get along with everyone and you like to inspire others. Relationship with this one person is also important to you, perhaps this is what complements your personality. Sometimes it can be difficult for you to be alone or to find inspiration outside of it. You can also be strongly influenced by others’ opinions on you, be it from your partner or someone from work. You are very proud of your negotiating skills and ability to bring the peace everywhere. You can also be a person who motivates others with your relationship (and that everyone can achieve a beautiful relationship).

🌊Sun in 8th house- your true personality is hidden from others and you usually find light through things that are deep, hidden, behind the scenes. Your ego shows itself many times when you are jealous or when someone notices others before you. You you may find yourself driven to understand the depths of your own nature so that you come to terms with the power you hold within. You like power and control. You could be fascinated by the workings of psyche, helping to create emotional transformation and lasting change. Self acceptance then comes from seeing others in their true light. You can find your will to live deep within yourself.

⛵️🎸Sun in 9th house- you find inspiration in travels. You see life as full of opportunities and new things. Places can take you over and you can always find your favorite place. Many times you can look for a place under the sun. You are a person who can teach others a lot and can tell many interesting stories. You get to know the most things when you travel, and that's also good for your soul. Places by the water or places that take you over are the best for you. Your belief is best seen through your passion for life. You can be a very good teacher to others and help them find faith and inspiration. Sun here indicates that you will understand who you are by exploring the world. Intuitive about deeper meanings and following what life has to offer for the soul, they will look to experience with people and situations that make them develop as philosophers.

☁️Sun in 10th house-you may feel motivated to fulfill your ambitions and so will drawn toward accepting responsibility or embracing executive positions. It can be harder to find motivation, inspiration and light - but it comes later in life. Many times you look for yourself through the audience, your parents or your father. You want to find the personality that suits you best. Sun here motivates you to have a strong influence and to get recognized while you’re also satisfying your thirst for power and make your dreams come true.

🪷Sun in 11th house-you are most motivated through your dreams, goals, friends. You find a lot of happiness and inspiration through friends. You are also very open minded. When you don’t have the same interest as someone, you prefer to leave that person behind. Because you adapt almost instantly to new groups and situations, you’ll fit in everywhere. These people also post a lot on social networks. Usually these are some things with which they inspire others. Maybe when people see your profile they feel better and you give them hope.

🩵Sun in 12th house- you find inspiration through everything that is hidden from others. Your personality is hidden from others and you like it because that way you can feel the safest. You are more productive when you do things alone and when you do them at night. Belief can be found through spirituality, subconsciousness, dance, music, art, or something related to your thoughts. Meditation and yoga are also good here. Sun is the representative of the ego and identity, this house is among other things, about limits and the line between what’s real and what’s completely strange. This means natives with this aspect are confused about who they are and about life altogether. Finding yourself and becoming determined, confident and starting to believe in yourself and your abilities is the key here.

✨Ig- bekylibra✨

-Rebekah🫧🌊🩵

#astrology #energy #zodiac signs #planets #my notes #astrological houses #sun #sun in houses

1K notes · View notes

edenesth · 4 months

Text

The Way to His Heart [8]

Pairing: general!Seonghwa x wife!reader

AU: arranged marriage au (Joseon era)

Word Count: 3.6k

Summary: Life has been hell ever since your mother's passing many years ago. Despite being from a prominent family, you've never received the privileges associated with it. It only got worse with the arrival of your stepmother and her daughters. When the intimidating General Park was in search of a wife, your father seized the opportunity to dispose of you, simultaneously securing a connection with the powerful general—killing two birds with one stone.

Part 7 | Fic Masterlist | Part 9

"Sir, the dressmaker has arrived with the mistress' first batch of clothes. Should I send him directly to the House of Lotus?" Jongho asked tentatively from the entrance of his master's study.

Removing his hands from his head, Seonghwa looked up and shook his head miserably, "Lord, no. Send him to me first," The assistant bowed and went to do as he was told, "Right away, sir."

Hongjoong entered the study without bothering to knock, hands propped on his hip as he stared at your husband, unamused, "Would you mind explaining why I'm here instead of presenting the new clothes to your wife, Park Seonghwa?"

"I need advice, Hongjoong." The general croaked, feeling quite lost for once. He had rarely ever been in such a situation; who knew all it took was one woman to put him in such misery. Not even the most vicious enemies he had fought in war could have ever fazed him this much.

He returned from work the day before, enthusiastically sharing his plans for the grand wedding he wanted to give you. However, things went south when he dropped the bomb about the visit to your old home, foolishly believing you would express joy at the prospect of flaunting your newfound happiness to your wicked family. Instead, you were gripped with fear at the idea. You ended up retiring to your quarters early and refused to come out ever since.

Goddamnit, I'm the biggest moron ever.

The dressmaker raised an amused brow, having never seen Seonghwa like this before. He went over to sit down across from his friend, "Hmm, I didn't think you'd be having trouble in paradise this soon. Let's hear it; we'll see if there's anything I can do for you and that lovely wife of yours."

Taking a deep breath, your husband started from the beginning, recounting every single thing that happened from the start of your arranged marriage until the present.

"Wait, you're taking her back to that wretched place? No wonder she's upset, you idiot! You said it yourself; she suffered so badly being caged in there all her life. I mean, sure, your cause is very noble—wanting to make her family pay for what they've done with this plan of yours. But you'd been so focused on that, you forgot how traumatising it could be for her, huh? You really didn't think that one through, my friend."

Letting out a groan, the general pulled at his hair, "Yes, thank you for repeating it all to me like I didn't already know what I did wrong. Now, tell me what exactly it is that I can do to make it all better."

"You're welcome. Oh, I'll tell you what to do, all right. You best keep your dumbass seated here while I talk to her," instructed Hongjoong, watching expectantly as your husband frowned, "What? Why should you talk to her? It's my mess; I should be the one to clean it up."

Sighing, the dressmaker explained, "Look, we all know the only way for you to make things better is to not take her back to the damn house at all. But you do have a point, okay? You've come this far with your plan, and as much as it sucks, she must go there with you in order for this to work out. So, you stay put, and let me convince her to go willingly with you, got it?"

Seonghwa nodded reluctantly, realising his friend was right. As much as he hated how charming Hongjoong was and how persuasive he could be, he would have to rely on those skills to help you see things in the bigger picture. Sure, you were not privy to any details about the revenge, but hopefully, he will be able to make you at least want to stand up to your family for once.

"Lady Park, it's Hongjoong. I've brought your first batch of clothing. May I have permission to enter?" Blinking in surprise, you straightened up, not expecting to hear the dressmaker's voice, "O-okay, please come in."

Despite the anxious state you'd been in since the revelation your husband had dropped upon you the night before, you couldn't help but smile at the unusually colourful outfit of your visitor. Eunsook followed behind him with a group of servants filing in to deliver the precious cargo into your quarters.

The head maid felt relieved to see you smiling again, even if it was only a little. She had been concerned about you after witnessing your retreat into your old shell the previous night, as the fear you demonstrated reminded everyone of your initial arrival.

In an effort to distract you from your upsetting thoughts, the dressmaker quickly pulled out a few designs he thought you'd love, "Come, take a look at this! I made it the way you preferred and added a little touch of my magic. What do you think?"

Fortunately, his strategy worked like a charm, and you immediately moved over to him with sparkly eyes, marvelling at some of the most beautiful hanboks you'd ever seen, even prettier than the ones he had displayed in his shop.

As you admired the clothes in front of you, Hongjoong exchanged a knowing look with the elderly woman. Nodding, she quietly exited your room along with the rest of the servants, leaving you alone with your husband's old friend.

But you weren't entirely alone, of course.

Unbeknownst to you, Seonghwa was right outside, listening intently. He didn't spare any of his servants a glance as they all passed by him with a deep bow, waving his hand carelessly in a gesture to ask them to leave quickly.

"Hey, you haven't answered me. Do you like them, Lady Park?" The dressmaker asked, a teasing smile on his face as he found your endearing shyness adorable.

You nodded quickly, "Yes, I do. I love them. They're all perfect. I just... don't know if I deserve to wear any of these." The general felt his heart clench at your response, realising you were still far from being able to love yourself.

With a scoff, Hongjoong moved to stand beside you, "I'll have you know I only make dresses for people I deem worthy of them. Not just anyone can wear my designs, you know. And you, by far, are probably my favourite client. So that says a lot."

Your husband silently agreed with those words, resisting the urge to rush in there and hold you tight, to tell you that you deserved only the best, that you deserved everything good in the world.

Lowering your head, you fiddled with your fingers before replying in a small voice, "You're only saying that because I'm the general's wife..."

Sighing lightly, the dressmaker turned to face you, "You're not wrong... but that's exactly because not just anyone can be Lady Park. Many women before you tried to be in your position. Regardless of their efforts, he never would have given them the time of day. Yet, he wholeheartedly accepted you."

Recognising the doubt in your eyes, he further explained, "I understand if you think these are just words. But that's probably because you don't know the general like I do. We've known each other since joining the military in our teens. Back then, the Seonghwa I knew would never bat an eyelash at any woman."

As you slowly looked up to meet his kind eyes, intrigued to learn more about your husband's past, he continued, "Those rumours about him being the cold-blooded general were not lies. He really was as merciless as they say. He still is, just not to you. When I saw him again for the first time after years that day, I couldn't believe the man in front of me was the same friend I once knew. He's different around you; he's different because of you."

"It's evident that you're special to him, that you mean something to him. He cares so much about you; do you realise that?"

Tears welled up in your eyes, and you hurriedly blinked them back. The thought of someone genuinely caring for you still seemed surreal despite the amount of care that had been shown to you since living here. However, you were starting to understand that he was right.

Hongjoong grinned, seeing the effectiveness of his words, "You're the first and only woman who can tame Park Seonghwa, so you are beyond worthy of my dresses."

Before you could even attempt to protest, he held up a hand, "And don't bother telling me I'm wrong because I'm never wrong."

You couldn't help but giggle at his sassy words, and he smiled sincerely at you, saying, "So don't you dare question whether you deserve these clothes. You're the only one who deserves them because these are made only for you, do you understand?"

This time, you nodded with a wide smile.

"I want you to wear my dresses proudly and show the world who you are: the great Lady Park, the only woman General Park wants as his wife. No one will dare disrespect or look down on you again."

Feeling as if he knew exactly what had been worrying you, you felt touched. He was right; you were not who you used to be. You had no reason to cower from your family, recalling their belittling assumptions about your survival in this marriage. Now was your chance to prove them wrong.

With newfound determination, you nodded firmly, "You're right, I will. Thank you, Hongjoong. You're a good friend; Seonghwa is lucky to have you."

He crossed his arms over his chest cheekily, "I sure am. That fool hasn't a clue how fortunate he is."

Mission accomplished.

Pumping his fists in victory, your husband silently cheered outside, brushing off the playful taunts from his friend. Just this once, he would forgive Kim Hongjoong.

"Are you ready, my dear?"

The general turned to you as your carriage came to a stop, marking your arrival at what you assumed to be the Jang estate, your former prison. With a resolute nod, you smiled up at him, "I am."

As you moved to exit the vehicle, your husband halted you. Cupping your face in his hands, he gazed reassuringly into your eyes, "Remember, whatever happens, I'm here with you. You're not alone from now on; I'll always be here to protect you."

"I know, Seonghwa. I believe in you."

His heart melted at those words, and he couldn't resist pressing a lingering kiss onto your forehead. You fluttered your eyes closed, holding onto his wrists, cherishing the warmth he was providing.

"Alright, let's go." Leaving one final peck on your cheek, he got out of the carriage and swiftly helped you down, his strong arm securely wrapped around your waist. Eunsook stood there, mouth agape, that was initially meant to be her responsibility but she realised her assistance was no longer needed at the moment.

Jongho grinned, nudging the elderly woman on the shoulder as they followed their master and mistress into the minister's estate, "Come on, we've got work to do."

Taking a deep breath, you surveyed the familiar surroundings that once made you feel small. Feeling a reassuring squeeze on your hand, you found comfort in your husband's presence.

Yes, he's here with you now.

Nothing bad will happen.

His grip on your hand tightened, and his warm smile, reserved only for you, vanished when a few of your father's servants nervously stumbled out, bowing deeply before both of you, "Good morning, General Park. Welcome to the Jang estate."

The brave front you had put on seemed to falter slightly as you realised the servants here remained the same, showing no acknowledgement despite you no longer being their prisoner. Seonghwa, glaring at the maids in front of him, growled in a low voice, "You've left out Lady Park. Will you not greet my wife?"

Gulping on behalf of the servants, you witnessed the return of the general's intimidating demeanour. Hongjoong was right; he was still terrifying, just not to you.

The maids bowed deeper, "B-but sir—"

"What is going on here?" That voice resonated across the courtyard, causing your heart to plummet to the lowest pit of your stomach. Perhaps you weren't ready to face them at all. Your father emerged from the main hall, wearing an expression that was far from pleased.

You pressed closer to your husband, and instinctively, he wrapped an arm around your back, pulling you close. The minister's eyebrow raised in surprise at your refined appearance; he nearly did not recognise you. You were even more stunning than on the day you left this place, seemingly given a complete makeover.

Aside from that, he realised the general had meant his words when he had spoken so highly of you during assembly. Witnessing the intimacy between the two of you, there was undeniable evidence of shared affection. Your father began to question whether marrying you to his enemy was a mistake in the first place.

Seonghwa smirked, "Ahh, Minister Jang, it seems your servants do not know proper manners. They did not greet my wife, and that, to me, is punishable."

The old man felt his eye twitch at the general's satisfied grin before responding, "Well, I'm their master, so I decide what is punishable, General Park."

"Right, well, I'm just looking out for you. Wouldn't want people to find out what rotten-mannered staff my father-in-law has in his estate, not knowing how to show respect to even the general's wife."

"You do realise that before she became your wife, she's my daughter first." Your father sneered, and you felt sick at that, to be called his daughter when you've never once been treated as such.

Remaining unfazed, your husband retorted, "All the more reasons for them to show respect to their eldest miss then, no?"

Jongho and Eunsook bowed their heads in an effort to hide their snickers at the minister's red face flushing in embarrassment. He should have known better than to think he could win the general in an argument, "R-right. What are you fools standing around for? Show Lady Park some bloody respect!"

The line of servants bowed all the way down pathetically, "Yes, master! Good morning, General Park and Lady Park! Welcome to the Jang estate!" They chanted loudly, enough to bring about the rest of your family, coming out to witness what all the fuss was about.

"Very well, let us head in then." With a bored expression, Seonghwa walked into the hall with you, moving right past your stepmother and stepsisters intentionally, paying them no mind as he helped you into a seat before settling down beside you.

All four of the women standing in the main hall were rooted to their spots, eyes bulging as they took in the sight of you and your husband. First of all, you were nearly unrecognisable. If they thought you looked pretty on the day you got married, you were now almost a hundred times more beautiful, though they would rather die than ever admit it out loud.

Beyond your enhanced appearance, they were more taken aback by the general's beauty. He was nothing like they had imagined; he must have been one of the most attractive men ever, or at least the most handsome one they had seen so far.

Suddenly, your stepsisters were even angrier than they were upon learning about your stupid grand wedding. They were now furious with their father for never having told them about how good-looking General Park truly was. If only they knew, they would have volunteered to marry him themselves.

But what if there was still hope for them?

What if they had a chance?

After all, you hadn't officially wed Seonghwa yet and were merely here to discuss plans for the upcoming ceremony. Perhaps, with enough effort, they could still win him over. If a peasant like you could seduce the general, why couldn't any of them? With this determination in mind, the three stepsisters promptly began adjusting their appearances as you all gathered around the main hall.

You didn't appreciate the way your stepsisters were eyeing your husband, although you understood their motives. Sensing your discomfort, Seonghwa moved closer to you in his seat, whispering in your ear, "Are you feeling alright, my dear?"

Nodding lightly, you looked up with a small smile, "I am, as long as you're with me," He couldn't resist smiling at your words as he gave you a gentle peck on the head, "Good."

That should be me!

The three stepsisters clenched their fists, their fury intensifying as they witnessed the handsome general being affectionate with you. It should have been them; the title of the general's wife was more befitting a noblewoman like them, not a rat like you. How dare you sit there in their place as if you deserved it?

In an attempt to break the silence, Jinah cleared her throat and made her move, "Have you been well, unnie? I missed you so much! Did you know how worried I was about you? You must have had such a hard time, especially after you adamantly refused to marry General Park."

Seonghwa raised a brow in amusement, while you remained quiet, unsure how to respond to such a blatant lie. Jinjoo scoffed at your lack of response, "Unnie! Will you really not answer Jinah at all? You've always been like that, so ungrateful when we care so much about you!"

"Really? My wife being ungrateful? That's wild. I cannot imagine her like that at all." Your husband chuckled, holding you close when he felt you begin to tremble.

Jinhee's fists shook with envy as she nodded pitifully, "Yes, that's because you haven't known her well enough, my lord. She can be so scary when she's mad, you know how the eldest usually are."

Minister Jang rubbed a tired hand over his head when he realised what his stepdaughters were trying to do. Of course, these foolish girls would easily be blinded by the general's appearance. Even his own wife, seated beside him, found it difficult to take her eyes off the gorgeous young man.

Jongho and Eunsook, positioned behind you and their master, were making every effort to contain the irritation they felt. The audacity of these women to feign innocence after what they've put you through all these years. They were once again thankful not to have any of these conniving foxes as their mistress.

Rubbing his thumbs over your hands, Seonghwa laughed sarcastically in disbelief, "I'm sorry, I just find that so hard to believe. Are you sure you're not all talking about yourselves?" In an instant, his smile dropped, and he sent your stepsisters a death stare as if daring them to continue spouting more ridiculous lies about you.

Left in stunned silence, they blinked nervously and avoided his eyes, unprepared for his questioning. It was clear that they hadn't planned their silly little act thoroughly.

Damn it, how did that worthless thing manage to gain his favour?

"That's enough." The minister declared firmly, not wanting his stepdaughters to continue embarrassing themselves. All he wanted was to get the general out of his house as soon as possible. Every moment that Seonghwa remained felt like a threat; your father was walking on eggshells around him.

Pushing himself off his seat, the old man addressed your husband, "You mentioned wanting to see the environment your wife grew up in, right? Let's proceed with that before we delve into discussions about your wedding arrangements. I don't have all day."

"Sure, can't wait." Seonghwa responded smugly, standing up with your hand securely in his. A sense of unease washed over you as you wondered what kind of deception your father would employ. Surely, they wouldn't be stupid enough to reveal your actual room to the general. Dread filled you, and you longed to return home.

Your real home, not this nightmare.

« Preview of Part 9 »

As you all followed the minister around the estate while he showed the general what was supposed to be your old room, Jongho exchanged a glance with the private investigator who was still posing as a staff member in the estate.

"This is unnie's room; she has the biggest and nicest one out of all of us. She's so lucky and doesn't even know it. I'm the youngest and I have the smallest room; I'd honestly be happy to have anything at all." Jinjoo said innocently, playing with a strand of hair as she batted her eyelashes at Seonghwa.

You stared blankly at the room supposedly designated as yours. It was merely a guest room rearranged with some of your stepsisters' belongings to create the illusion of long-term habitation. Sensing Jinah and Jinhee's intense gazes on you, you turned to find them glaring daggers at you as if daring you to speak up and disclose the truth to your husband.

If you voiced your denial, who would believe you? It was your entire family against you alone. Would there even be a point in trying?

Just as doubt started to creep in, Seonghwa wrapped an arm around you, reminding you of his support, "Is that true, my dear? Is this your room? It doesn't really seem to be your style at all."

Everyone held their breath, awaiting your response, but you remained silent, fixing your gaze on the familiar space where you spent your entire life, now masquerading as a storeroom.

"What is it that you're staring at so intently, hm? Let's go take a look."

Oh, crap.

Shit will go down in the next part, I assure you. Patience, my dearest readers, patience HAHA this part was focused more on setting the stage for the main event.😈

Also, I've created a mood board for this fic. If you haven't already checked it out, go take a look! I might consider making another one that depicts Seonghwa's estate if I'm able to find the right images.

As always, thank you for reading and let me know your thoughts! <3

Tag list (1/3): @huachengsbestie01 @evidive @weedforthoughtz @ssrnghwa @yunnieo @sunnyhokyu @lynnsqueendom @frobin4ever @chwesuh-imnida @thunderous-wolf @itstheghostofmypast @professormingisglasses @deltamoon666 @avantalem @famishalll @yungilia @soobiverse @joongified @scuzmunkie @http-gyu @mentoslol @atinyreads @angel-hyuckie @anxiousskylar @onedumbho3 @narashii @ddaeing @sanstreasure0305 @sohnfile @scarfac3 @dreamingofyeo @puppyminnnie @tinyteezer @vantediary @satsuri3su @mismatchfluffysocks @aliona124754 @bts-army380 @lilactangerine @atinyniki @pay13 @1117promises @xoxkii @st4rcig4r @hikarii02 @nescaffei @xdolls-crownx @ashrocker123 @skzline @minkiflwr @starssongs98 @baeksofty @skz1-4-3 @kawaiikels @madnpan @maoyueze @en-happiness @cheolliehugs @persnyako @startinystay @chngbnwf @fatspecimen @christinerose380 @stfu-rina @kyukyustar @taytayy178

Tag list (cont.): see comment/reply section

#edenesth #the way to this heart #ateez #ateez fanfic #ateez fanfiction #park seonghwa #ateez seonghwa #arranged marriage au #joseon era #seonghwa x reader #seonghwa x you #ateez fic #historical au

718 notes · View notes

prettyflyforawhitelie · 2 months

Note

I love your Husk pieces! He's my favorite =^.^= I wanna hug the shit out of him 😆

If you have time, could you do one where Charlie planned a movie night for "bonding" lol and the reader ends up falling asleep on Husk? Everyone ships them and encourages him to confess to her? So much fluff please! Thanks hon! ^.^

A/N: This is so adorable!! Love this! I hope you enjoy! XD

Pairing: Husk x fem!Reader

“Until I Smile at You” - Husk x Reader

After living at the Hazbin Hotel for a while, Charlie’s “trust exercises” had become less of an annoying nuisance and simply a part of daily life. Actually, they were kind of refreshing and - dare you say - fun! They ranged from trust falls and share circles to your personal favorite - movie night. Movie night happened once a week and every week the person who chose the movie rotated. This week was supposed to be Angel’s turn, but ever since he chose his movie to be the most graphic porn anybody had ever had the displeasure of seeing, he was banned from choosing the movies. Instead of Angel, the group decided to let Alastor choose. He was always a marvel, as his movies ranged from silent films to disgustingly gorey horror movies. Tonight, however, he picked a noir detective film that he enjoyed while he was still alive (not before endlessly complaining about how radio is the superior media form, though).

One thing that nobody could stand about Alastor’s movies was how much he talked during them. I guess it's because he's so used to working in radio that he cannot comprehend that maybe, just maybe, not everybody wants to hear his voice all the time. He would either explain every little detail about the leading actors or talk about a living memory that he associated with the specific scene. This night, though, Alastor seemed so enamored by the movie that he was completely silent. You were sitting on the couch with Alastor, Angel, and Husk, and found your eyes getting slightly heavier with every passing minute. The combination of the dark room, boring movie, and precious silence was just what you needed to drift into a peaceful slumber. Slowly resting your head and body on the irresistibly soft and warm cat demon beside you, your consciousness fades in and out until your mind is finally met with sleep.

The second Husk felt your head meet his shoulder in a gentle embrace, he froze. He had only ever imagined this happening, and was nowhere near prepared for it to actually happen tonight. Despite his hard and tough facade, Husk craved nothing more than soft affection, and knowing that you trusted him enough to not disturb your slumber flattered him. He remained completely still (so as not to wake you) for more than an hour until the movie finished. Charlie, using the remote to find another movie, said,

“Thank you guys for spending tonight with me! This was amazing! I think I’m going to put on another movie, if anybody wants to stay down here, but you’re welcome to go upstairs and go to slee-'' she is cut off when she turns around to see you asleep on Husk, practically beaming with joy. “AWWWWW-” she is cut off by Husk’s “Shh!”, partially because he is embarrassed but also because he doesn’t want you to wake up in embarrassment. This caused everybody’s attention to turn to the two of you, not quite as surprised as Charlie.

“I mean, are we shocked? He’s been fawning over Y/N ever since she moved in. Don’t shame the poor guy…” Angel says in a mocking tone.

Everyone’s eyes slightly divert, not wanting to completely show that Husk’s attraction to Y/N is anything short of obvious.

“Shut the fuck up, man” Husk replies.

“I’m not saying that she’s told me that she likes you back… buuuuut you should definitely just tell her. Trust me.” Charlie says, literally gleaming with excitement.

Hearing this, Husk’s insides flip, his internal monologue running wild.

‘Did she- does she- could Y/N actually like someone like me? She’s just so… perfect. I don’t deserve her. But - let’s just - don’t get your hopes up, man. This could just be Charlie being Charlie, saying shit to make people leave their comfort zones or something.’

“Alright idiots, let’s not wake her up.” he says, sighing and gently picking you up.

“I hear a single word about this tomorrow, and I’ll kill ya.” he says, while quietly walking to your room.

He rolls his eyes while listening to Angel making fun of him and Charlie trying earnestly to defend you guys, saying something along the lines of “But this is how Vaggie and I started to fall in love!”

Opening your door as quietly as possible, he gently places you down on your bed. Covering you with blankets, he turns to leave until he hears your soft voice call to him:

“Was all that stuff they said about you true?”

Shit. You heard? Should he deny it? Pretend he didn’t even hear you?

“What?”

Deny it is.

“The stuff that Charlie and Angel said… about you liking me. Is that true?” you ask.

“I don’t know what kind of dream you were having, but everyone was dead silent during the movie, because, yknow, bonding time or whatever.”

He was avoiding your gaze until now, hoping that you would just accept the lie and go back to sleep. Instead, when he looked at you, he was met with your disbelieving face staring right back at him.

“Mhm.” you say sarcastically.

Moments of awkward silence lead to Husk trying to make a quick escape, muttering goodnight and walking to your door. He’s halfway out of the doorway when he hears your voice again.

“It’s a shame, I was hoping that what they were saying was true.” you say teasingly, just loud enough for him to come back into the room.

“What did you say?” he asks.

“Oh, nothing” you reply, smugly.

“Don’t do that.” he says, clearly intrigued but trying to seem annoyed.

“Do what?” you say, teasingly.

“Satan, just tell me what you said. I don’t like playing games.” he says.

“Oh, but, clearly you do, if you’ve been ‘fawning’ over me since the day I've walked in, yet.. said nothing.”

He looks - embarrassed. Almost hurt.

“Fine, yeah, I like you. No need to rub it in and be an asshole about it, I know you don’t like me.”

You look at his diverting eyes and immediately regret your teasing tone.

“Oh, Husk, I wasn’t making fun of you, I was just being stupid. Come here.” you say, patting the spot next to you on the bed.

He sits next to you, looking confused.

“Here.” you say, while holding his hands in yours.

“Listen. I wasn’t trying to embarrass you. I’m sorry if it came across that way. I mean, obviously I like you too. Was it not clear?” you giggle.

Husk’s eyes widened in shock.

“What- I mea- You like me? Why?” he blurts out.

“Why? Come on, don’t be dumb. You’re the funniest person I know, you’re always willing to listen to me, and you’ve never once turned me away when I needed help. And, you're truly handsome, but that’s just a bonus. You’ve made being trapped in Hell actually enjoyable, which is something that you should be proud of. I wake up everyday excited to see you, to talk to you. I just wish you would've told me that you liked me sooner (and yourself)” you say.

Husk’s eyes are glued on you like you’re the last thing he’ll ever see, like he has to memorize your every feature before he blinks. He has never been more enamored with anybody before.

In lack of a better response, all he can blurt out is, “Thank you!?”

You giggle, a slight blush creeping up your face.

“And you are clearly tired. How about you sleep in here tonight? We can cuddle, or talk, or just sit with each other.” you ask.

“That - That sounds great.” he says, truly letting his guard down for the first time in years. As he lays next to you, finally becoming truly comfortable, he swears that he can see a white, fuzzy hand holding a phone by the slightly-ajar door.

“Angel, if that’s you by that door right now, you’re gonna want to run.”

You can hear the spider’s screams of “I GOT IT GUYS! THE FULL VIDEO!! AHAHAHAHA!” as Husk reluctantly leaves the bed.

“Excuse me,” he says, “I’m gonna go take care of this. I’ll be back.”

As he leaves, you start to realize how you got from the couch to the bed in the first place. Smiling to yourself, you savor the fact that, though you were condemned to eternal damnation, these people that you have found could not have created a better heaven for you.

457 notes · View notes

eternalera · 3 months

Text

I'm making an analysis of this scene because fuck it, it means sm to me

so basically the scene im talking about is the one above and why (because fuck you l like adam and lute) it means so much to me

first off when do we actually see adam smile and im not talking about when he's being an asshole to charlie or making some unfunny sex joke. I'm talking about when he looks genuine.

Like he looks actually happy, not entertained but happy because thats what it is with charlie. He's smiling because he's entertained with her reactions and how pissed he's making her.

Whenever we see him smile it has this almost evil feel to it (whether that be with the teeth in the mask that he wears or not although it probably is... i'll get to that later). It feels like he's meant to be the villain. He's meant to be someone you're meant to hate. So why in this scene does it make you feel bad for him and lute? (almost depending on the person cause yes i know some of you jumped up with joy at this, i aint judging)

it makes you feel bad because there's something human in this scene whether we like it or not. that also comes with the removal of their masks. we've never seen adam without his mask so him losing it in this scene provides us with the sense that 'hey hes still human' he's not some eldritch being sent from hell/heaven. he's a guy.

this also comes with the removal of lutes mask. we see her genuine emotion. we actually see her being to cry something that honestly seems almost out of character for her seeing as she's pretty much that one character whos like 'fuck it lets power through this'

this also is similar to adam smiling cause it shows you that in the end he wasn't a total asshole.

but back to the masks. the masks make them have pretty sharp looking teeth which is something that we associate with sharks or some sort of predator. yet removing the teeth (actually adam doesnt even smile with his teeth) you suddenly get a lot more of a human feeling

they dont feel like a villain anymore (even though thats what they are) they feel like a person. it doesnt make him feel like a threat anymore so you have an actual ability to feel bad for him.

but moving on (i ramble a lot so this may not stay on track but its fine :D ).

our last scene of adam in this entire show (im pretty sure like yknow... direct scene) is him smiling. him showing genuine human emotion. because whether or not you guys wanna admit it adam was the first human, and he does have feelings that pertain to humans. so why have this be our last view of him? of him being quite literally beaten down.

well personally i feel like this is because the show wants us to see him as lute sees him. she saw him (as from what ive gathered) as a genuine friend. she actually liked his company and liked hanging around him.

so this pushes her idea and avenging adam or getting revenge for his death. if we didnt have this scene her just getting upset at lilith and taking charge randomly and getting just randomly mad at the hotel would be kinda... eh.

like it wouldnt make for that good of a story.

but with our last moments of adam being him smiling at lute it shows us basically something else. that he cared, for what? we dont really know but he cared for something because its clear that the extermination failed and adams dying. hes fucking dying something he seemed so upset over two seconds ago screaming and shouting how he shouldnt die or whatever

so its most likely that he cared for lute making this scene all the much sadder. besides its the only thing we can assume seeing that lute was the last thing that he saw before passing on.

also ive seen theories that make a lot of sense with lute being the only one who stuck it out with adam till the end. lilith left him, eve was created from his fucking rib and yet she most likely left him. so he probably died pretty damn along the first time around

so lute being there for him and showing that she cared for him and that she still cares for him probably meant a lot. most likely because she stuck around until his death, she stuck around till the end which once again, he died alone the first time and dying with someone with you the second probably means a lot

anywaysssss yeah thats it byeeee

479 notes · View notes

catboybiologist · 3 months

Text

About to fall asleep ramble time, this has been kicking around in my brain for a bit and I need to get some form of this thought out

I was diagnosed with ADHD and gender dysphoria one day after the other back in August. Extremely stereotypically zillenial of me, I know. Handling both of these has dramatically improved my quality of life. yes yes insert discourse about how much you need to have dysphoria as a diagnosis, it's just a tool for the medical system that's ultimately meaningless, that's not what this is about.

There's one thing that was really, really weird about the experience of getting care for both of these.

Most treatment and public talk of transition and motivations to transition are about misery. How much despair your birth sex gives you and how gender affirming care is the only stopgap against suicide (oftentimes, used as a barrier to entry that it should only be given when it's at the suicidal point). How crushing dysphoria is.

In contrast, most of the public perception of ADHD is this cutesy, "omg look I'm so quirky" kind of thing. People talk of ADHD "superpowers" and how neat it is to have hyperfixations (I'm low key starting to dislike that word, even though it's an accurate description of many things- it's very overused).

My actual experience has been almost exactly the opposite.

I absolutely had gender dysphoria, and still do, and misery associated with being AMAB. But is that what defines my trans experience? No, and in fact, it feels like a more incidental blip in it. My trans experience has mostly been defined by joy, by feeling my mind and body slowly make me more and more content with my default existence day after day. And the exploration of it all! The social roles, the romantic dynamics, the friendship dynamics, even small aesthetics like clothes and makeup, and again, the body and mood changes. It's incredible and it brings me joy so much of the time. That, more than anything, has defined my trans experience.

In contrast.... ADHD has objectively made nearly every aspect of my life more miserable. Working with my therapist and my pysch, as well as feeling what it's like to be properly medicated, have shown me extremely well how much the constant feelings of misery I always seemed to have were caused by ADHD. ADHD means being unable to receive a baseline level of dopamine to function under normal circumstances, so your brain starts looking for any way it can get new sources. And wouldn't ya know it, novel stimuli are a perfect way to do that. Keep in mind that dopamine isn't just "the pleasure molecule" it's a neurotransmitter with a broad range of functions. If you don't have ADHD, or even if you do, I want you to think about how miserable of an existence that is. Your default state is depression and inability to do things. It has been for me for most of my life. Additionally, anxieties creep into your head and distract you far more easily. You're less functional. You can't do simple things most of the time. You're distracted and have anxiety spikes easily. Continuous tasks are hard. And day in, day out... You are miserable. Almost constantly.

Oh also, you're easily addicted to extreme novel stimuli. For me, it was self harm. And when that stopped working... Well, I was in a state of mostly background depression that was only punctuated by spikes of massive, overwhelming anxiety that my brain hooked itself on. At a certain point, I just wanted it to end, by any means necessary.

It's been almost ten years since that day, and at this point I can genuinely say that I'm glad I'm still here.

But it wasn't dysphoria that did that (it contributed a bit, but still wasn't the biggest factor). Or a depressive disorder. Or bipolar. Or whatever the big, more "scary" mental illnesses or neurodivergencies are. They tried to treat me for some of them, and it ended horribly. My symptoms fit mixed presentation ADHD perfectly, including my physiological response to stimulants. They don't fit anything else. I likely don't have any strong comorbidities, unless you count the symptom-level anxiety and depression. ADHD did all of that to me. The "cute and quirky" one.

By the time I got around to a diagnosis, my pysch was astounded that I made it as far as I did with symptoms as severe as mine. Tackling ADHD has removed so much misery from my life, it's indescribable. Adderall has been the only thing that has ever actually gotten rid of my constant anxiety.

It's not fucking cute. Keeping with this being the flip side to my dysphoria, I do try to keep it light most of the time, and I join in on all of the classic "whoopsie doopsie my ADHD" trains and jokes. You don't have to stop making those, hell, they're fun. There are cute and funny parts to having ADHD, and ways it's made my personality what it is. But don't forget that this is also something that makes people genuinely suffer well beyond the "oopsie I'm such a procrastinator!!!" Type thing.

Idk where this thought is going. It's just kind of an observation that's been kicking around in my head for a bit. So uh. Hope it at least generates discussion? Feel free to add your experiences if you think it'll help you. But fuck I need to sleep lol

#trans #adhd #cw self harm #cw suicide

342 notes · View notes

sparkle-fiend · 1 year

Text

Steve loves Valentine’s Day.

It’s a holiday celebrating love and romance; the whole point is to shower someone with affection (and hopefully get laid at the end of the night). What’s not to like about that?

With girls, Valentine’s was easy. Big box of chocolates, a dozen red roses, dinner at a fancy restaurant (and maybe a little jewelry or something - depending on how much he likes her). A sweet card, for sure.

Now that he’s dating Eddie, Valentine’s Day presents more of a… challenge.

“Ugh, what am I gonna do Rob? We walked through the greeting card aisle at Melvald’s and he pretended to puke. He doesn’t want flowers or chocolate or anything.”

He knows he’s whining. He’s slumped dramatically in the single office chair in the Family Video breakroom, spinning slowly (like a pathetic little rotisserie chicken, according to Robin). He’s probably got about five more minutes before Robin snaps.

“Why do you have to do anything? You know Valentine’s Day isn’t even a real holiday – it’s just an excuse to get people to spend money on crap they don’t need…”

“Oh my god, stop! You sound just like Eddie. Valentine's isn't about spending money, it's about... showing people that you love them. Making them feel happy and appreciated and special. It’s about celebrating love.”

Robin tilts her head and her face goes a little soft, the way it does when he says something she wasn't expecting (but in a good way, not like when he says something so dumb that her body collapses and she says he's obliterated her will to live).

"That’s actually surprisingly sweet Steve. Okay….” she sighs and looks up at the ceiling as she thinks. “Maybe... you could try making something? He liked those cookies you baked for movie night."

“Those cookies were terrible.” Practically inedible. Eddie was the only person that ate more than one. (Which was either a true declaration of love in and of itself, or proof that Eddie will eat literally anything when he's stoned.)

"I don't know, Eddie is pretty easy to please. You could give him like... a cool rock, and he would probably love it."

Steve sits upright so fast he nearly overturns the chair. "Robin, you're a genius!!"

She blinks at him. "Clearly. But also, why exactly?"

Eddie is like a crow. He's forever picking up little odds and ends - cool rocks, stickers, shiny bits of paper. At Christmas, he collected the bows off of everyone's presents. Sometimes, he incorporates the stuff he finds into little props and models for his D&D games, but other times he just keeps it. He's got a whole drawer devoted to his little 'hoard', as he calls it.

Steve explains all this to Robin, who just shakes her head in bemusement. "He is so weird," she says fondly.

"Yeah," Steve agrees. He would have recoiled from that oddity in high school - would have been worried what other people would think. Scared they would judge him for associating with someone like that.

He doesn’t give a shit, these days. He sees the way Eddie lights up with happiness at the smallest things, so full of excitement and passion, and it just makes him smile. He feels grateful that he gets to bask in that reflected joy, like a flower soaking up the sun.

Valentines is two weeks away, which gives Steve plenty of time to collect a bounty of little treasures. He hits the pawn shop, the thrift store - he even drives out to the weird antique shop about an hour out of town, which looks like a normal house on the outside and is crammed to the rafters with knick-knacks and bric-a-brac when you walk inside.

He also trawls the quarry, the lake, and the woods behind his house. It's tough, because usually Eddie's little treasures just look like trash to Steve. He's not a very creative person himself, but he tries hard to see the world the way his boyfriend would.

If that means Steve finds himself debating for over half an hour on which rock is more appealing, well – it will all be worth it in the end.

———

Steve stays over at Eddie's, the night before Valentines. (At this point, he spends more time at the Munson's house than he does at his own.)

He wakes up early, slipping out of bed with slow, careful movements. As usual, Eddie rolls over with a faint grumble, bundling himself into a burrito of blankets to compensate for the void of warmth left by Steve's absence.

He moves down the hall, avoiding each creaky board like it's a booby trap in the Temple of Doom, until he reaches the kitchen - which is where Steve breaks routine. He sneaks out the back door and races across the driveway in his boxers, hopping and cursing as the frigid gravel stings his bare feet.

His carefully cultivated stash of gifts is in the glove compartment of the BMW. He already has a plan for which one will be first, so he grabs it and closes the door (slowly, slowly - the sound of Steve moving around the house is familiar, but a car door slamming in the driveway at this time of morning would wake Eddie for sure).

The first gift is a blue jay feather he found in the woods, perfect and clean with vivid blue and black stripes. He tucks it carefully under the edge of the ash tray that sits on the porch railing, before slipping back inside to start breakfast.

Thirty minutes later Eddie appears, drawn by the warm smell of coffee and the sound of bacon popping in the pan.

He drapes himself over Steve's back and murmurs, "G'mornin," sleepily into the shell of his ear, the way he does every morning after Steve spends the night. This time, Steve balances his spatula on the edge of the pan and turns so that he can wrap his arms around his boyfriend’s waist.

He presses a cheerful kiss to the corner of Eddie's mouth and says, "Happy Valentine’s Day."

Eddie groans dramatically and throws his head back, the rest of his bodyweight following. If Steve didn't have a firm grip around his waist, he would have toppled over backward; the move turns into an awkward backbend instead.

"Stevie please, it's too early for that crap. Wait until I've had my coffee at least."

Steve grins. He releases his hold just long enough for Eddie to yelp and scrabble for balance before catching him and pulling him close again.

"Jesus Christ," Eddie gasps.

"Careful," Steve says with a smug grin, laughing when Eddie shoves him in the chest and pulls away.

They eat breakfast together, and then Steve follows Eddie outside for his morning cigarette.

"Holy shit, look at this!" Eddie turns to Steve with the blue jay feather pinched between his fingers, grinning with delight. He hasn't brushed his hair yet and he's got a smear of bacon grease on his cheek, but he's so beautiful in that moment - so full of joy it shines out of him, like a lighthouse.

Just because he found a feather. Steve smiles back, helplessly besotted. "Pretty cool."

Eddie twirls the feather between his fingers before tucking it behind his ear. “That’s a sign that today is gonna be a good day.”

Steve presses his mouth to the edge of his coffee cup to hide his expression. “Yeah, I think so too.”

———

Eddie rolls into the Family Video parking lot around 2 in the afternoon to visit before his band practice. He strolls inside and leans against the counter, plonking a silver wrapped Hershey kiss down in front of Steve.

“Kiss for a kiss?” he says, with a smarmy grin. Steve rolls his eyes, but he checks to make sure they’re alone in the store before swooping forward for a quick peck on the lips.

“I got you something too,” he says.

“Oh?” Eddie raises one eyebrow, managing to look both curious and skeptical. “Please tell me it’s not a cheesy greeting card.”

Steve flips him the bird before reaching into his pocket. He pulls the keychain out and lets it dangle from one finger in front of Eddie’s face.

His boyfriend’s immediate reaction is to wrinkle his nose in disgust. The keychain is a garish red plastic heart, definitely the antithesis of Eddie’s usual metalhead vibe.

But it’s also sparkly.

Steve’s lips curl into a satisfied smirk as Eddie takes the keychain from him, reluctantly admiring the way light sparks off the flakes of holographic glitter embedded in the plastic. The cheap little thing shimmers like a ruby in the afternoon sun.

“Some kid dropped it. They never came back, so it’s yours if you want it.” (That’s technically true, although Steve has been holding on to it for nearly a month now, waiting for today.)

“Oh, well then.” Eddie stuffs the keychain into his pocket. “Finders keepers, losers weepers!” He sticks his tongue out, eyes wide and exaggerated – then leans across the counter and licks Steve’s nose.

“Gross!” Steve sputters with laughter. He scrubs at his face and looks up just in time to see Eddie wave jauntily on his way out the door, a second Hershey kiss left sitting on the counter in his wake.

———

After Steve's shift is over, he runs home for a quick shower and a change of clothes before meeting Eddie at the diner.

He did his best to talk his boyfriend into going on a proper date, but the most he could get Eddie to agree to was milkshakes and a movie (my choice Stevie, not some lame romance).

Steve walks into the diner and spots Eddie at the back booth. He saunters over and sets the third present onto the sticky Formica table with a click. It's a small golden gear, nearly paper-thin.

"Check it out. Found this in the parking lot."

(That's a lie. Steve carefully picked apart a broken old watch from the thrift shop in order to extract a handful of the little gears.)

"Hey, cool! I bet I could use this in the model I'm working on." Eddie pulls the pack of cigarettes out of his coat pocket and drops the gear inside for safe keeping.

"What's the model for?" Steve asks.

Eddie launches into an animated explanation of the character he's creating for a new Hellfire campaign - a sun-worshiping priest that intends to trick the party into becoming a ritual sacrifice.

"... and that gear thing would look pretty good on the top of his staff."

Steve doesn't understand much of what Eddie's saying, but he loves the way his boyfriend talks with his whole body, moving his hands and shoulders and head along with the words. He rests his chin in his hand and lets Eddie ramble until the milkshakes arrive, smiling like a dope the whole time.

Eddie has no concept of time, so Steve is in charge of making sure they finish their milkshakes and leave the diner in time to make it to the movie. As Eddie slides into the passenger seat of the BMW, he says, “Hey – you think we have enough time to stop by the Circle K?”

Steve turns in his seat as he reverses out of the parking lot. "What do you need at the Circle K?"

"Snacks! You can't go to a movie without provisions Stevie! And don't say we can buy some at the concessions stand, because the prices they charge are ridiculous."

“Well if we stop now, we’ll be late – but I’ve got some Milk Duds and trail mix…” Steve doesn’t realize what’s happening until it’s too late. Eddie pops open the glove compartment in his search for snacks, revealing Steve’s little stash of gifts.

Eddie frowns in confusion. “What the hell?” He rifles through the pile as Steve groans.

“Shit. You weren’t supposed to see those yet.”

“What is all this?” Eddie picks up a ring, turning it over in his hands. It's a bulky silver biker ring, like the ones Eddie wears every day - only this one is shaped like a bat with tiny ruby eyes. Steve is particularly proud of that one, discovered in a box of assorted rings at the pawn shop.

Steve gnaws at his lip and runs a hand through his hair, ruining all his careful styling. "I know you hate Valentines, but I wanted to do something. Just… to show you how much I love you. So instead of the cards and flowers and stuff, I tried to find little things you might actually like. For your, you know… your 'dragon hoard' or whatever you call it."

"So the keychain and the gear..."

"And the feather."

Eddie's eyebrow twitches. He stares at the contents of the glove compartment; at the water smoothed stone from the lake and the multicolored twist of ribbon, the vivid green marble and the tiny mother of pearl locket. He looks down at the ring still clutched in his hand, and blinks rapidly.

Steve glances nervously between Eddie and the road, hands tight on the steering wheel. He's disappointed that the surprise has been ruined, but more concerned about Eddie's reaction. He'd expected the other boy to laugh or tease him, not this... whatever this is.

Finally, Eddie clears his throat roughly and speaks. "Actually, can we just head back to my place? I've got something I wanna show you, and I don't think I can wait through the movie."

“Uh… sure.”

Steve's brain is buzzing as he takes a left instead of a right at the intersection. He's worked himself into a bit of a panic by the time they pull into the Munson's driveway. "Eddie, I..."

Eddie interrupts him, practically throwing himself across the center console as he drags Steve into a fierce kiss. By the time Eddie lets him go, Steve is panting. "Wha...?"

"Wait here," Eddie says with a wild grin. He presses Steve back into the seat for emphasis. "Don't move."

He takes the steps up the porch two at a time and fumbles with his key to get inside as Steve watches in a daze. He has no idea what's going on.

After a few minutes, Eddie returns to the door. He's pulled on a t-shirt with a faux tuxedo printed on the front, and he's standing straight backed in the doorway with a towel over his arm, like some kind of maître d’. He waves grandly toward Steve, beckoning him toward the house.

Steve snorts with laughter as he climbs out of the BMW. “What are you doing?”

"This way sir," Eddie replies in a terrible attempt at a posh English accent. Steve shakes his head, thoroughly bewildered and increasingly amused.

He walks past Eddie through the doorway and freezes in surprise.

The living room has been transformed. Eddie set up the gaming table in the middle of the room – set with a crisp white tablecloth, the Munson’s best dishes, and a vase full of red roses sitting in the center of the table, flanked by two candles. More candles twinkle softly from the coffee table, the end tables - even on top of the tv.

"Eddie..." Steve whispers in awe. "What is this?"

"Well, ah... I kind of jumped the gun a little. It’s supposed to be a candlelight dinner. If we'd gone to the movie, Wayne would have had time to get all the food set up. But it won’t take long, I already cooked everything. Just gotta heat it up."

Steve’s vision goes watery, smearing the candlelight into one big blur as tears fill his eyes. He blinks hard to clear them. “I thought you hated all this stuff.”

Eddie shrugs and rubs the back of his neck nervously. “Well, yeah I do. But you love it. So I wanted to surprise you.”

Steve grips his boyfriend by the front of his ridiculous t-shirt and pulls him into a bone-cracking hug, before pulling back just far enough to kiss the breath from him.

In a pause between kisses, Steve rests his forehead against Eddie’s and laughs a little breathlessly. “What made you change your mind about the movie?”

Eddie bites his lips, already swollen from kisses. Steve can’t tear his eyes away.

“I don’t know. When I saw all that stuff you collected for me…” he clears his throat, staring at Steve with wide dark eyes. “I’m… I know I’m weird. I’ve known that my whole life. I never thought I would find anyone that would tolerate me, let alone… celebrate me like that.”

He kisses Steve again, sweet and soft. “I couldn’t sit and wait for two hours after that. I had to get you home and show you how much I love you.”

“I love you too.” Steve smiles against Eddie’s mouth. “You know… I’m not really hungry yet.”

“Oh yeah?”

Steve trails his hands down Eddie’s chest, hooking his fingers into the belt loops of his jeans and tugging. “Mm-hmm. I think we need to work up an appetite first.”

Eddie laughs in delight. “Sounds like a good idea. You know how much I like dessert before dinner.”

A happy Valentine’s Day indeed.

#steddie #steddie fic #my writing #Valentine’s day ficlet #I’ve been working on this over a week #and still ended up having to rush to finish for today #not real happy with it #I wish I was a faster writer

1K notes · View notes

junggunz · 7 days

Text

beside you ft. jay jo | 🔞

summary: Sneaking around with Jay is one of your favorite ways to pass time. cw: fembodied!reader, smut, lowkey angsty, established relationship, infidelity, homewrecker behavior, fwb!Jay, oral (f receiving), p in v, creampie, all characters featured are 18+ wc: 3k an: i lowkey botched this request lol my badddd might redo it when i dont feel like writing smut so jay's mom can actually walk in on him and reader making out lol. buttt i was SUPER inspired by keshi (specifically beside you duh and just friends) since i associate his music with jay for some reason.

It’s mostly peaceful when things are like this. Being with Jay alone, not having to deal with the loud chatter of your other friends. And most importantly, not having to be face to face with Shelly when you’ve been fucking her boyfriend on a weekly basis–on some weeks, seeing him on the daily.

The silence in Jay’s bedroom is calming until you start thinking too much about the circumstances. You don’t know why you settle for this kind of relationship with him. You’ve laid with him intimately, seen him in his most primal and vulnerable states, got peeks into his mental framework during pillowtalk– but it wasn’t enough to cross the threshold of “being just friends.”

But when he’s calling you in the middle of the night after a long study session to invite you over, are you really just friends? When he’s fucking you from behind with a hand clamped over your mouth so your moans don’t wake up the rest of his family, can you actually be “just friends?”

Never has Jay invited you over for the sake of just talking and hanging out. It’s always as a means of stress relief, taking out all his frustration into your hole when he can’t find joy in his favorite hobby. Even today– when he invites you over in the late afternoon when the sun is gradually setting, filling his room in a warm orange glow rather than waiting until the cover of twilight.

“What took you so long to get here?” Jay mumbles between placing kisses on your neck once he gets you to his room, hands roaming your body like he had already forgotten what you felt like beneath his palms.

“Traffic. Everyone’s getting off work at this hour.” You reply softly, letting your head fall back to give him more access to the stretch of skin his lips occupied.

Walking you backwards until your knees hit his bed frame, Jay ushers you onto the bed without pulling away from you. Lips sealing yours, there’s no time for you to voice any complaints about how fast he moves.

His tongue coaxes your lips into parting for him, meeting yours and sliding up against it in the most salacious of dances. Tongue slithering past your parted lips, it moves in tandem with yours once they meet; lewdly rubbing up against each other until you have saliva spilling past the corners of your mouth.

So caught up in the heat of the heated lip lock, you barely even realize that you’ve started grinding against the growing bulge in Jay’s pants. The friction is nowhere near enough but it’s addictive, you can’t stop. His hands grabbing onto your hips in an attempt to still you isn’t enough to get you to stop squirming, seeking out a means of extinguishing the heat that had been steadily building in your core the moment he kissed you.

“If you want me, say you want me.” Jay gently chides you, the words dancing across your lips.

Funny, you’ve said something along the same lines to him in the past when discussing the nature of your relationship. But there’s no time to dwell on the blurred boundaries of your so-called friendship when your mind is clouded with lust, only interested in getting down to the real reason you were in his bed in the first place.

“I didn’t know you liked reassurance.” You taunt him with a small scoff.

Your fingers find the hem of the loose fitting t-shirt he wears, tugging at it and silently demanding it come off. You crave the feeling of Jay’s skin on yours because it’s the most warmth and comfort you’ll ever receive from him. Reaching for the back of his shirt’s neckline, the fabric comes off with minimal effort. Giving you no time to ogle at the lean muscle of his frame, Jay makes quick work of your top; eager hands palming your breasts through your bra.

It’s moments like these where you finally get some sort of reassurance that Jay feels something toward you—even if it’s just lust— and every touch is filled with so much longing, so much passion. The desire is almost enough to make you believe that he sincerely wanted you in more than just a physical way. His hands reach under your back, your body arching to make it easier for him to remove your bra before you toss the wired fabric off to the side.

Jay’s lips are on yours again, this time each tender kiss serves as a distraction for him to strip you out of the rest of your clothes. As soon as you’re completely nude, his mouth no longer occupies yours and ghosts along your jaw; going down your neck to nip the skin hard enough to make you wince but not leave a mark. From your neck to your chest, his lips trail lower and lower until you see him comfortably settled between your thighs.

Hooking his arms around each of your thighs, he pulls you closer to him; your hips coming off the mattress and your center perfectly aligned with his lips. It’s always the same song and dance with Jay– and he’s seen you naked on so many occasions– but you never stop feeling shy whenever he goes down on you. The fluttery kisses on your inner thigh. The focused expression that shrouds his features. The way his hips buck into the mattress to get some relief from the pressure building in his pants. It all makes your heart tremble with excitement, much like the way the first swipe of his tongue on your pussy makes your legs tremble.

Treading softly on your body, Jay savors the time spent between your legs. His tongue traces out the letters of an apology to you, hoping that you could decipher the message because God knows that he couldn’t bring himself to utter the words to you. Stringing you along like this was never his intention, but the fact you stay gives him no real urgency to break things off. How good he feels while lying with you is more than enough to cast away any guilt he feels about keeping two different people on each of his arms to fulfill different needs. Seeing how his initially one-sided relationship with Shelly was able to bloom into a connection that helped him grow as a person, maybe if circumstances had been slightly different, your relationship with him would’ve developed the same way.

But instead, you’re confined to a timeline where Shelly is the one to speak to Jay’s heart and you’re the one who can only communicate with him via body language.

For all of the emotional nurturing and comfort that Jay can’t provide to you as a person, his warm tongue is more than happy to deliver it to your pussy. Languid strokes that lap at your folds that lead to your clit; leaving no part of you untouched. As good as it feels for you, the thick stripes licked over your folds are a mere warm up for Jay. He starts out so slow and lazy with his mouth, the actions only fanning the flames of your arousal rather than dousing them. It’s only when he gets you to the point of dripping all over his sheets and feeling like your cunt had its own pulse, he amps up the actions.

Swollen pearl throbbing with need, you start to fuss and your fingers seek out Jay’s hair; pulling on the inky locks to get him to keep going. Though he wants to poke fun at your desperation, he moves where you need him, encasing your clit between his pouty lips and sucking with an intensity that he knows you can’t resist. He knows he’s done it right when you start bucking against his face and cause your juices to smear all over the lower half.

Jay spends nearly an hour eating you out; caught in a loop of licking up all the nectar that seeped out of you while also causing you to leak out more. He gets you so close to climax, only to retreat and leave bite marks on your inner thigh; the tiny jolt of pain sending your senses in a frenzy.

“Why are you being such an asshole today?” You groan, your voice coming out weary and shaky. “Let me cum.”

“Last time I saw you, you said something about not spending enough time together.” Jay says after pulling away from you, tongue poking out to run over his lips and clear them of any of your lingering juices.

“You’re too smart to pretend that you don’t know what I meant.” You respond in an almost dejected tone before it seems like something snaps in you and you’re put back into a state of indifference. “Whatever, just fuck me.”

Maybe if he was in a different state of mind, Jay would have tried harder to think about what your words truly meant. However, when he’s been ignoring his own arousal for the sake of pleasing you for so long, he isn’t very receptive to your evasive response.

Nimble fingers undoing the drawstring of his joggers and shimmying out them, his boxers come off as well and are haphazardly kicked off. His cock springs free, long and hard and already leaking pre-cum. It’s not often that you see Jay like this– looming over you, hands on either side of your head as he holds himself above you with the tip of his cock dragging along your folds. He slides his cock back and forth over your slick cunt instead of rushing to put it in; his precum dribbling down and making everything messier. Looking up at him through your lashes while his eyes were fixed on the sight of his cock sliding across your slickness, you remember why you rarely took him in missionary.

Jay was breathtakingly handsome whenever he was fully engrossed in something– fucking you was no different. Just looking at him while he humps against your pussy, his dick catching on your clit every so often has your neglected hole clenching in anticipation of being filled. When the underside of his shaft is thoroughly coated in your arousal and your clit is sensitive to direct contact, no matter how light the touch is, Jay finally guides his cock into you.

“Fuck, that’s good.” He hisses lowly, a shuddering breath escaping him while he watches your tight hole greedily sucking in the rest of his length after breaching your entrance. “So…fucking…wet.” He pants, head falling forward slightly as he squeezes his eyes shut; the sight of his shaft disappearing within the heat of your cunt becomes too stimulating to handle. Your walls stretch to accommodate his dick as he buries it inch by inch.

Pushing his hips forward until his full balls are pressed against the curve of your ass, you and Jay moan in unison as he bottoms out within you. No amount of sex with Jay could fix the hole in your heart that he had left, but being full of his thick cock like this almost makes the heartache worth it.

You rarely see eye to eye with Jay on matters pertaining to emotions. However, it goes without saying that both of you wish you time would stop whenever he was balls deep in your juicy cunt. After getting over the initial bliss of being inside you, Jay slams his cock in deep; making your breath get caught in your throat from the force. The little choked out noise you make causes his eyes to flit to your face, concerned that he had hurt you but as soon as he does that, he regrets it. Pleasure is written all over your face and it has his cock throbbing inside of you, encouraging him to keep pumping his dick into your heat. And soon, he’s fucking into deep spot in your pussy that has your eyes rolling back and grabbing onto his biceps for any means of keeping you grounded.

“Oooh, fuck. Right there, don’t stop.” You plead, your voice sounding foreign to you as it comes out whiny and prurient.

You know he won’t stop. His hips are still into yours like a dog in heat, focused on his own ecstasy that merely happens to be elevating yours. He was giving you these brutal strokes filled with so much greed, your high is within reach. It’s embarrassing how sensitive you are after being edged for so long. Any and every instance of physical contact has you moaning, but it’s the hard and urgent manner that Jay pumps his dick into you that makes you cry out the loudest; as well as making your wet cunt lewdly squelch.

“You’re getting too loud.” He scolds you, meanly grinding into you and teasing your sweet spot with each snap of his hips.

“No one’s even home.” You whine as you let Jay fold you in half, pushing your thighs back as far as they’ll go so your knees are lined up with your shoulders.

“Don’t get into the habit of being this noisy.” He grunts, pressing you in half and slinging your legs over his shoulders.

For all the noise you can’t make while in this new position, it has your pussy clenching around him and of course, the excessive tightness has him fucking you harder to counteract your walls trying to keep him in place. Those deep, deep strokes hit you in all the right ways.

Leaning further down, keeping your body pinned under his weight, he presses his mouth to yours. His lips are soft, the taste of you lingering on them. For how erratically Jay’s hips move as they pummel into you, he manages to keep his kisses relatively tame; his tongue is precise and intentional with every move against yours. The feverish moans and pants that you eat up let you know how good he’s feeling. How much he craves this release. It’s just one of the few things you have in common with one another.

“I’m really fucking close.” Jay whispers against your lips, fucking you with all the pent up frustration he stored up while eating you out. “Are you?”

He speaks those words so quietly, they barely pull you out of the lust induced trance you’ve been under. The heat that’s been blossoming in the pit of your stomach was starting to spread throughout the rest of your body, making you forget how excruciating it was to be in this folded position.

“Y-yeah.” You weakly mumble, biting your lip.

That’s all Jay needs to hear before giving you these calculated thrusts right into your sweet spot; repeatedly hitting the bundle of nerves. Pink cheeks, jaw tense, eyelashes fluttering – they all make up the feverish look on his face. He’s impossibly close to finish, gritting his teeth as he keeps ramming his dick into the spot within you that makes your toes curl. He keeps at it, trying so hard not to cum before you so he can feel your walls milk him for all its worth when he reaches his peak.

With the repeated stimulation of your sweet spot, it doesn’t take much to get you right on the edge. Deep, deep strokes hit you perfectly and just in– one, two, three sharp thrusts– you’re hurtling to your orgasm.

You have to bite Jay’s shoulder to stop yourself from moaning so loudly as your pussy clenches around him, an obscene amount of your juices trickling down his shaft when you cum. Not too far behind you, Jay brutalizes your sensitive, quivering walls until he shoots his load deep into you. The warmth rushing your insides makes you shudder, but it’s nothing compared to the dull ache you feel when he pulls out of your still spasming cunt.

There’s no time to lay around together after such an intense finish; his mom would be home soon and you both knew that. Immediately after cleaning up, Jay sees you out; but the air is thick as the two of you linger at the front door step.

“Why are you just staring at me like that?” You ask after an uncomfortable stretch of silence, not wanting to leave on such a strange note.

“I…don’t want to say ‘bye’ yet.” He murmurs, sheepishly rubbing at the nape of his neck.

There’s a first for everything, it seems. Up until this point, Jay hadn’t been too keen on being alone with you for too long. Or at least, he had behaved that way. Getting into his mind and deciphering his emotions had never been your strong suit– if it was, you’d probably be dating him and not just hooking up.

“But you don’t wanna just hang out with me, right?” You retort with a bitter laugh before turning away from him. “I’ll see you later.”

You don’t make it very far before Jay catches your wrist, pulling you back toward him. A few more seconds of silence ensue while he stares at you. Though it’s not clear what’s on his mind, it’s obvious to you that he wants to say something. His lips quiver, mouthing the beginnings of sentences but nothing ever comes out as you impatiently wait for him to speak. The moment you open your mouth to berate him and tell him to get on with it, his hands are cupping your face then he’s leaning in down to press his lips on yours; eating up all the words you were planning on hurling at him.

Time just moves differently whenever you’re with Jay. For you, it always feels like it’s not enough. And from his perspective, it swings too wildly between seeming like an eternity and being an ephemeral moment. Despite not knowing the exact number of minutes that pass when he’s kissing you, it’s long enough for his mother of all people to spot the two of you locking lips.

When you part, she’s nowhere to be seen, leaving you and Jay clueless that someone had seen you two together. After Jay gets his kiss, he seems content with finally letting you go– so you do without hesitation. You leave him to wrestle with his own moral compass and feelings he can’t share with anyone else but you; if he had ever found it in him to be more candid about his emotions.

Until then, you would simply stand beside him as his friend in public; picking apart his shortcomings until being “just friends” became more appealing than being his lover. But while in private, the hedonist in you would enjoy the way he arranged your guts.

#windbreaker x reader #windbreaker smut #jay jo smut #jay jo x reader #jay jo scenarios #junggunz.txt

157 notes · View notes

drconstellation · 4 months

Text

Come Back When You Can Make A Whale

This is going to contain some speculation for S3, so you know what to do! Or not do!

SITIS: What did God say? JOB: Um... I'm not sure. I didn't understand much. Things too wonderful for me. Ostriches came into it. SITIS: Ostriches? JOB: And whales. God's very proud of the whale. Went into some detail about... how great whales are. SITIS: But did They explain? JOB: [shakes head] I think the point was, if you want answers, come back when you can make a whale.

Whales, huh?

If you aren't well read, this could be quite the misdirection. It should be reasonably obvious, given who is doing the talking - Job - what he is actually referring to, then we can join a couple of dots to make some speculative leaps.

You still with me?

No? Then let us start with how do you make a whale?

By giving it another name.

Leviathan.

Chapter 41 of the Book of Job is all about the Leviathan, a great sinuous sea serpent with impenetrable scales and breath like fire. It sleeps beneath the sea until the end of days. Over time it came to be associated with any sea monster, then anything large, and what is the largest animal ever known to have lived? The whale.

The top of the matchbox is also worth a look. We have a skull and crossbones, which is classic Memento mori symbolism, fitting in with the resurrection theme of the Second Coming - but look at the way the address of the pub is spelt! Now, this not the same way it is spelt on the record single Maggie gives to Aziraphale; Goatgate is spelt as one word, not two. A little bit of searching reveals the meaning behind this fictional address that backs up and reinforces the quote on the side of the matchbox.

Strong's Concordance for 66 gives us "wild, savage, fierce." Goatgate is an interesting one, because it turns out to be a relatively modern term from the urban dictionary, and I'm just going to refer to the polite version of it here - it's another word for "mouth." So 66 Goatgate is a "fierce and savage mouth." Yes, that does sound about right - in more ways than one, once you know who it is. (If you want to look up the impolite version, go ahead - I'm sure you will still find the connotations very amusing.)

Our metaphorical Leviathan is Crowley. He gave the game away at the end of S1 during the appearance-swap.

This also means Aziraphale is his counterpart, Behemoth. Why - well, I made a bit of joke in my post here that he was playing at being a "river horse" while he wallowed in the bath of holy water during his part of the appearance-swap scene. Modern day scholars think the description of Behemoth in the Bible may be that of a hippopotamus in real life history. If that is so, I'd still be betting this is what the "dark horse" comment from Nina in S2E1 is foreshadowing.

Maybe none of this new to you if you've been hanging around the the fandom for a while. That's fine, I'm just trying to establish the scene. And the next bit we need to talk about is this one, where Job gets a lecture from God.

During this sequence, we hear lines that come from Job 38 and 39.

GOD: Job, if you have questions for me, I have questions for you. Do you know how I created the earth? Where were you when I laid the foundations of the earth, Job? Were you there when all the morning stars sang together and all the Angels shouted for joy?

These lines are paraphrasing some of the beginning of Job 38.

Then we have:

GOD: Do you know the rules of the heavens? Did you set the constellations in the sky? Can you send lightning bolts and get them to report back to you? Did you give wings to peacocks, Job, or teach the ostrich to run?

These lines are again, paraphrasing Job, half from 38 and half from 39.

So then, we need to ask, why highlight these lines in particular?

Job 38 is mainly about setting the boundaries of the universe around us. The Earth might seem impossibly huge to a human, but it started with a single stone at its foundation. Earth and the other planets obey certain laws as they move around the Sun. The patterns of the stars in the sky take so long to change that it seems like they are set and inconstant. Even the chaotic form of lightning respects its Creator and returns to its point of origin.

From the last part of Chapter 38 to the end of 39 God challenges Job with a list of animals. The theme here is about freedom and wildness. Whether it is a noble lion, a loathsome crow, a nimble mountain goat, the head-strong wild ox or the willing war horse, they all flourish upon the Earth under the sight of the Almighty. Even the mightiest and most fierce beasts of all, Behemoth and Leviathan, have a place, although only God has the means to control those two.

None of this needs a human to be involved. We are so often the center of our own universe, and try so hard to control every aspect of the world around us that we lose sight of the bigger picture. Shit happens. Some things are out of our control. That doesn't mean its your fault and you're wicked and damned to go to Hell because of it. And that was the point God was trying to make to Job. The world is a far bigger, wilder and chaotic than you can imagine, but its also incredibly beautiful, and it runs itself within the rules and limits that seem to be set by invisible forces you can't see.

So back to the script from the show.

The first set of questions from God could apply to both of the duo. They were both around when Earth was created and were more than likely there when the "morning stars" (the highest angels, such as Lucifer, Gabriel, Michael and angel!Beelzebub) sang together.

The second set of questions are the ones that seem to have got the most attention so far, with ops cross-matching them to things Crowley does in S2.

Do you know the rules of the heavens?

Did you set the constellations in the sky?

Can you send lightning bolts and get them to report back to you?

Did you give wings to peacocks, Job...

(I make a suggestion this has something to do with Michael, but also see comments below)

...or teach the ostrich to run?

The first three of those questions are fairly straight forward, and I doubt many would dispute what they are referring to. But the reference to the peacock and the ostrich are more subtle and curious, and I would like to take a moment to look at the actual verse - because it is only one verse that is providing both questions - that is being paraphrased here.

Job 39:13 Gavest thou the goodly wings unto the peacocks? or wings and feathers unto the ostrich?

Did you realize that the King James Version of the Bible is the only one that mentions peacocks in this particular verse? All the other versions mentions the first sentence of that verse in relation to the wings of ostriches: "The wings of the ostrich wave proudly." The ostrich is considered a cruel and witless bird in the Bible, pleased with the way it looks, and seemingly careless about its young.

Why does that sound familiar...

Shax thinks this ostrich feather-clad angel in disguise isn't too smart either.

So using the peacock line is a curious choice in the script. Other than the "eyes" in the tail of the peacock having a connection to Michael's many watchful eyes on the world, it's still not clear how Crowley helped them upwards. Unless both lines are supposed to refer to Gabriel, and how the vain peacock was helped to both fly and run to a distant location in the stars.

Edit: Since I first wrote this, @beebopboom pointed me to some more peacock lore, and this helped me delve a bit deeper into them. Peacocks were associated with wealth and royalty, but they were also associated with immortality in early Christian beliefs. There was a belief that the flesh of the peacock did not decay after its death. The bright colours in its tail came from its eating venomous snakes, which reminded people of Christ becoming sin for humanity's sake (think of Crowley downing the laudanum to save Elspeth from Hell in the crypt in 1827, its a similar action.) The "eyes" on the males tail also represented the all-seeing eye of God. So we have a connection with both royalty and resurrection here.

(Oh - just as an interesting connection here - a number of the newer versions of the Bible not only don't mention the peacock in this verse, they compare the ostrich to the stork! The meaning is meant to be that the stork cares more for their young than the ostrich, but if you read the words at face value, you could take a double meaning away...)

Let us return to questions, answers, and whales.

Questions. Always questions. It's like the proverbial toddler who's always asking a never-ending string of "but, why?" for funsies and you just want them to shut up for a moment and think about the last thing you said first. They, too, are a bit like Job. They are the center of their own universe at that age, having not had much experience of the world. They have no grasp of how far it extends beyond them, and how little even we as adults know.

If at this point you're going "oh, no, no, no, no, op, please don't tell me the point of this meta is it's all ineffable," relax. I'm not.

The point was to set you up for some nice, juicy, awesomely sweet S3 speculation.

Because I believe Crowley will finally get to ask his questions of God.

(oh lordy, I made the mistake of taking a break to have a shower before trying to finish this off, because I was having trouble seeing how to finish this in a tidy way, and that caused me to have "shower thoughts" and now the nice sweet simple speculation has turned into a slightly bat-shit crazy kind-of one, although still on the same track as what I was originally thinking. Here goes...)

We have this three card spread from waaay back at the beginning of S1. We all think its something to do with the three babies.

What if its not?

Because we need something like this to happen again - Aziraphale and Crowley either side of a third protagonist. What if it's the King of Kings, Love personified, Jesus, in the middle? (Or Adam again, I wouldn't discount that option either...)

If you would look at the GIF and the screenshot together again and go, well that makes, sense, white for the angel on the right, and green for the demon on the left, I would jump up and shout at you - NO!

Look at the cards again! In the Tarot, that's the Ace of Swords on the right - it belongs to Aziraphale. It's a very powerful card, about new beginnings and change.* Lets call the one of the left Knight of Wands, which also represents the element of Fire. Knights are all about movement and journeys. Who owns the Bentley? And look what Gabriel has instinctively done with his hands - he has held his screen-left hand out to Aziraphale, the Sword, the angel who wears green, and his right hand out to Crowley, the Knight of Fire. The yin and yang qualities are actually swapped. That was what I was trying to tell you in this post. They aren't as obvious as they seem at first glance.

And love is the answer, it turns out. Did you see my comment the other day on another post? In Strong's Concordance 25 = to love.

Anyway, we should get a third parallel scene somewhat like this, and like when Aziraphale and Crowley took Adam out of time to talk to him in S1.

Only this time the three of them (with who ever is in the middle) should be having a talk with God about what is or isn't supposed to happen.

JOB: I think the point was, if you want answers, come back when you can make a whale.

Crowley could be a literal serpent (though I would be very surprised if he did manifest that way) but it should be a metaphorical Leviathan that stands before the Almighty to ask his questions and get his answers. And it will be that he has earned the right to be there, because he finally understands the lessons of Job.

@makewayforbigcrossducks I hope this answers one of your questions

*The Ace of Swords speaks of new beginnings, but it is a two-edged sword that can cut both ways. It is strength in adversity, victory out of struggle, good out of evil, a change in the old order on the way.

#good omens #good omens 2 #good omens meta #crowley #aziraphale #job minisode #book of job #leviathan #behemoth #i only ever asked questions #come back when you can make a whale #gabriel #shax #did you give wings to peacocks?#teach the ostrich to run #king of kings #king of hearts #yin to his yang

202 notes · View notes

ayspec · 15 days

Text

a huge problem of why loveful folks can’t accept that lovespecs(? i’ve never seen others use this term but i’m going to) exist is their association that “love = care/kindness” so when they learn others don’t experience love or do so in a different way, it’s wrong because “so you’re saying you don’t care about anyone? so you aren’t kind to anyone and hate everyone? you’re just an emo edgelord that never grew out of their teen phase”

love ≠ care/kindness/respect/etc. love means “i feel x emotion” which is irrelevant to how you treat others—you’re more likely to be nice to others when you love them, but that isn’t always the case: love can cause abuse, love can cause stalking, etc.

“but that isn’t real love!!” imagine if someone hurt someone and got joy from that, and you claimed “but that’s fake happiness! real happiness comes from doing good things!” you sound ridiculous, right? because even tho the person is happy they did something wrong, that doesn’t mean their happiness isn’t real—we know this person is happy about doing a bad thing, but that doesn’t discredit happiness in general. we can acknowledge this person is genuinely happy while also knowing what they did is wrong, because “happy ≠ i did a good thing/something good happened to me”

so why can’t you apply this to love? why is love this untouchable, otherworldly being everyone likes to pretend is the source of humanity? it isn’t: it’s an emotion. when someone is a victim of abuse and you tell them “that wasn’t real love,” you’re discrediting their experience and creating a harmful idea that if a person loves you, they cannot hurt you, which is bullshit. victims of abuse can (and often do) genuinely love their abuser, and abusers can also genuinely love who they’re abusing. love isn’t this morally perfect emotion, and to dwindle it down to “love is good” is a toxic mindset

and you don’t need love to care about or respect someone. let’s say you’re talking to a cashier. you’re polite to them and if asked, you’d say you don’t want something bad to happen to them. by loveful’s logic, this means you love them, which probably isn’t the case. what about strangers you pass on the street? are you kind to them, and if someone fell on the sidewalk would you help them up? that’s kindness and respect, not love. i, and many others, don’t love the strangers we walk next to, but that doesn’t mean we want to shoot them all in the head or for something bad to happen to them

you don’t need love to be a good person, and tbh, i hope you’re only reason for being nice to others isn’t because your emotions tell you to be. if you’re only respectful to folks when you love them, then i doubt lovespecs are the bad guys here

#aromantic #loveflux #lovequeer #loveless aro #lovepunk #amatopunk #amatonormativity #lovespec #✨

136 notes · View notes

the-one-that-weeps · 1 month

Text

Following up on the Kanade post, let me remind you that all niigo members have ribbons and, obviously, all of those have meanings.

Collars and ribbons were always used as a mark of property, something you can't untie with easiness, something that can be an accessory just as a choking trap, so I think it fits fairly well. Let's look at some examples:

Kanade's is striking because unlike with the others there is no red to be found on her design, yet it's still a crucial part of her. Red, the colour of passion, of rage, of danger and of life. In literary analysis, red collars and strings often symbolize guilt or crime.

Just like Kanade, all the Virtual Singers also have red ribbons around them. And if that's not enough, Luka and Meiko have red strings wrapped around their hands, opposite to each other.

Mafuyu's is blue, but not the faithful light blue of Kanade's eyes, it's dark like the depths of despair. And not be your average lit professor but blue symbolises sadness and depression in any media.

Ena's is brown. The most common of all colours, the colour of dirt, of mud, or muddled paint, but also of vitality.

Mizuki's is pink, the colour of cute pretty things. And maybe if it's tight enough around their neck they can become one too.

Not only that, but all niggo members wear a black one too. Black, the colour of the night, of despair, of death and sorrow. But not the colour of Nightcord.

Because Nightcord is purple.

Purple combines the calm stability of blue and the fierce rage of red. It is often associated with mystery, ambition, creativity or wisdom and is on this thin line between warm and cold colours, black and colourful. But it's neither of those, nor life or death, nor joy nor woe.

And if that's not niigo I don't know what is.

#pjsekai #pjsk #project sekai #mine ☜#bramble rambles #niigo #nightcord at 25:00 #25 ji nightcord de #yoisaki kanade #kanade yoisaki #asahina mafuyu #mafuyu asahina #shinonome ena #ena shinonome #mizuki akiyama #prsk #project sekai analysis

113 notes · View notes

sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog · 1 year

Note

Welcome back to tumblr! In the post on Friday that linked to your interview about Awesome Coffee, you said that k-cups are coming soon. If you don’t mind me asking, what was the reasoning behind adding k-cups to the product lineup? Everything else seems environmentally friendly so I found it odd, so now I’m curious.

This is a great question. I don't know how to make my answer any shorter than this.

K-Cups ARE bad for the environment--not only because they contain plastic, but also because even thoughtfully farmed coffee has negative impacts on certain ecosystems, which is a very high cost for something that isn't necessity for human existence.

Anything that is a luxury for humans, from chocolate to books, has costs that are paid by the Earth and its inhabitants in exchange for things we don't actually need. Luxuries costs carbon. They cost land. They cost biodiversity. They may also, even if unintentionally, perpetuate and empower unjust systems of resource distribution. I think being aware of these costs is essential.

Luxuries also have benefits, of course. I am a big fan of books and chocolate (and coffee); they bring me joy. Coffee, at least when collectives are well-organized are paid directly, is also good for coffee farmers and the communities where they work.

The Awesome Coffee Club does not seek to eliminate the costs associated with consumption, because I don't believe they can be eliminated by selling coffee. Instead, the ACC seeks to DECREASE existing costs to biodiversity and systems of injustice. We do this by trying to reduce harm. In the case of our coffee beans, this means paying farmers directly and supporting collectives that are actively working to reverse deforestation. In the case of our packaging, this means packaging that keeps our coffee fresh while also being biodegradable. And in the case of our profit, that means investing all of it into healthcare systems in the world's poorest communities.

Unfortunately, around 30% of all coffee consumed in the United States is consumed via K-Cup. Many K-Cup manufacturers have no real interest in their costs to the environment. They may claim to be "recyclable," but this implies that they are commonly recycled, which they aren't. We have waited to make K-Cups because we wanted to understand what would actually reduce environmental harm in the K-Cup market, and we think we've found a K-Cup partner that reduces--but does not eliminate--the harm that comes from K-Cups by producing backyard compostable K-Cups. That is to say, these K-Cups do not need to be shipped to an industrial composting or recycling facility in order to be reused; they will break down in a backyard composting environment.

We think that offices (and it is mostly offices) that currently use K-Cups will serve the world and their workers better by switching to Awesome Coffee Club K-Cups. But to be clear, if you do not use K-Cups to drink coffee, you should not start. And if you do use K-Cups to drink coffee, you should switch to a whole bean or ground solution if it's practical for you to do so. But if you are married to K-Cups, we want to reduce the harm they cause.

#k cups #coffee #coffee company #the awesome coffee club

527 notes · View notes

imagines--galore · 2 months

Text

||Written In The Stars||

Summary: You had met him in the forest. A meeting that left an impact on you, just as it did. Neither of you escaped unscathed from your encounter. At least your heart didn't. And after that fateful run-in, perhaps it was finally time to bring to light what was clearly written in the stars. Pairing: Legolas x Reader Rating || Genres || Warnings: T. Romance. None. A/N: When I tell you I swooned at the Cinderella bit? I mean I ADORE the live action Disney remake and the dance scene is just gorgeous. Hope you enjoyed it @kililove. Also I couldn't help it! You HAVE to watch that dance to envision the last part of this fic perfectly ok?!

youtube

The first time you met him had been a chance affair.

You had been running through the forest, wind whipping through your hair. It was quite the norm to find you racing through the trees of the forest you called home. There was just something freeing about it, with the adrenaline rushing through your body, the wind whipping through your hair, and the near endless shelter of the forest you adored with all your heart.

Lothlórien was truly a place to behold no matter the season. The leaves would dance with the wind, the trees would sing joyful tunes to the morning sun, and lullabies to the moon and stars at night. The flowers would sway in the breeze, the animals would play with no fear of being hunted or coming to any harm. If there were ever to be a place akin to Valinor in Middle-Earth, it would be your home.

As you cleared yet another obstacle in your path, you let out a laugh that echoed against the very leaves of the trees you passed. Your laugh was one of pure joy, of freedom and utter happiness. You felt like you would race off the edge of the world and even then you would keep running because who's to say the world ended there.

And perhaps it was that laugh that pulled him towards you, that compelled him to halt whatever he had been doing and his head to instead follow the sound of your laughter, echoing as you raced away.

Any other person would've dismissed it and went back to their task, but not this listener. He was curious. Curious to know who would laugh like that while racing through the trees. A laugh so full of joy in such dark times. Surely this person had only ever known joy and nothing more. Sorrow, hopelessness, loss, none of these words could ever be associated with a person with such a laugh.

Little did he know why you laughed so. He would come to know later, much later, all that you had suffered, all that you had lost, all that you would loose. But despite it all, you never lost your will to live, and live happily. Live to enjoy everything around you. From the smallest of flowers, to the grandest of trees, nature brought you a sense of joy that nothing ever had.

Well that is until you met him.

You saw him from the corner of your eyes, a figure of gold and green that ran a few paces to your right. He had given no indication for you to stop, not that you were about to. You kept running, hair flying behind you, skirts ripped to allow your legs better movement, cheeks flushed, eyes bright as you turned you gaze ahead.

For him you were something akin to a wild thing as you raced through the forest. Free and untamed, like the horses he had seen racing in the fields of Rohan. He was barely able to make out your face, and wanting to look at you properly moved to step in your path.

But you quickly evaded him, all but dancing out of his way, jumping over a fallen tree, and continuing.

And so began a little dance.

One where he would try to get you to stop, but you would always change course and dash off. You should've found it annoying, and perhaps a little alarming that an elf was chasing you. But you didn't.

In your heart of heart you somehow knew he meant no harm. You had even allowed yourself to laugh at his failed attempts, a laugh that only prompted him to increase his efforts tenfold.

And not just because he wanted to stop you. But because if his attempts would make you laugh so, then he would gladly do so over and over.

Just to hear that sweet sound again.

Perhaps Lothlórien had traces of old magic left, something that was effecting his mind.

As he rounded a large tree, intent on stopping you once more, he skidded to a halt at the sight that greeted him.

You stood at the very edge of a cliff, your back to him, gazing out at the near endless landscape as it sprawled in front of you. The setting sun cast the last of it's warm glow, the wind blowing softly, prompting you to inhale deeply, closing your eyes, and holding out your arms at your sides. Almost as if you were embracing the very beauty of the nature around you.

He stood a few paces behind you. The very scene would remain with him till the end of days was something akin to ethereal. For him, everything in that moment was just that, ethereal. But none more so then you.

He had no idea who you were. For all he knew, you could be a mirage created from the very deepest recesses of his heart. What he did know, was that the moment he had heard your laugh, before he had even laid eyes on you, he had begun to feel his soul slip away from him.

And when you finally, finally, turned your head ever so slightly to look at him over your shoulder, he felt the very essence of his soul, his fëa, leave him to bind itself to you forever.

While he struggled to keep his composure, given how intense the moment was for him, you couldn't help but wander if perhaps your heart was beating so fast because you had just been running, or because it was beating so fast that it was trying to tell you something.

To tell you that the elf who had run after you and beside you, was the other half of your fëa.

Neither of you spoke a word, not as the sun disappeared and the stars peeked out. Not as the forest around you began to come alive with the creatures of the night. Not even when the moon shone down, bathing her cold yet somehow gentle glow on the both of you.

You were each lost. Lost in each other. It was almost as if you could read his heart and mind, and he could do the same to you. You could see his bravery, his loyalty, his kindness, his weaknesses and strength. And him? He could see your empathy, your joy, your devotion, your fears and resilience.

You were the one to make the first move. One step forward. A movement that he matched. One foot in front of the other, the wind blowing softly, pushing your hair back from your faces, the moonlight allowing your elvish features to glow in the dark. You were both only three feet away.

Two.

One.

A brief pause where you were almost nose to nose, your eyes never leaving the other's.

Intense.

Wanting.

Passionate.

Adoration.

Heated.

How were you able to convey all that and more with just that one look, you had no idea.

But then it was over.

You walked past him, slowly picking up speed, until you were running once more.

And this time, he did not follow.

————————–

You never forgot him.

He never forgot you.

You knew him by name, he was a Prince after all, and a member of the Fellowship.

All he knew about you, was the color of your hair, how expressive your eyes had been, and how, in his eyes, you were the very image of perfection.

He did not follow you that night. Not when he could not make any promises. Not when he had a mission to see to.

Legolas had often wandered what awaited him beyond the destroying of the ring, should he survive. He had no desire to go back home. And while he had made plans to travel Middle-Earth with Gimli once Aragorn was King, it never felt right in his heart.

And as he walked out of the Citadel, where the newly crowned Aragorn, and his Queen Arwen, were dancing so joyfully, he began to envision his own mysterious lady. The one he had met in Lothlórien.

The Lady.

Who was never far from his thoughts.

Who occupied his heart.

Who held his entire soul and had no inclination of it.

He could still picture her so clearly in his mind, he mused as he walked past the blooming tree in the middle of the courtyard.

You standing there at the edge of the cliff. Unconsciously his gaze lifted to the very end of the walkway along which he strolled.

An elleth with y/h/c hair, strangely the same color the figure standing at the end of the walkway possessed.

A figure, dressed in a blue dress, a color that reminded him of open skies during the day and the twinkling stars at night.

He stopped.

His eyes widened.

His heart quickened.

His fëa rejoiced.

His feet catapulted him forward.

The figure had her arms open. And while the last time those arms had been open to embrace nature, this time they were open to embrace him.

And while the last time the both of you had walked past one another, wanting, no yearning, for the other, this time it was different.

You watched him dash closer, you stumbled a few steps forward, until finally, you had him in your arms.

Neither of you knew how long you stood there for. Minutes. Hours. Days. Months. Years. Eons.

It was all the same.

"It would seem our meeting was written in the stars." His voice was low and gentle, prompting a warmth to race through your entire body as you hummed in agreement.

"The stars in my dreams were the ones who told me to come find you tonight." You responded, a dream you had had not so long ago coming to the forefront of your mind. "I was flying. On a Star. And it told me it would take me to you."

He joined your laughter, the both of you still holding each other close. Now though, he pulled back so he could look at you, his arms still wrapped around your waist, while yours laid over his shoulders.

"And here you are." He whispered, his gaze searching yours.

You gave a nod and a smile. "Here I am." You reassured him, leaning to press your forehead against his.

The music from the open door of the Citadel was perhaps what compelled him to lean back slightly. While your arms dropped to the side, one of his hands never left your back.

Your eyes never broke their intense stare as the both of you, slowly, began to dance to the song filtering from the Citadel.

You danced, and you danced, and you danced.

Your need to be close to him over-powered all else. His need to touch you overtook any sense of decorum he had.

Neither of you spoke a word, and yet you didn't think anything needed to be said. Not when your eyes spoke for you. Not when your Fëa sang to one another.

You were sure of what you felt for him, and he was sure that his heart belonged to you.

And as the new dawn greeted you with her warm glow, you finally allowed your eyes to close, an act he mirrored.

Before sealing that unspoken promise to never leave each other with a kiss that was more binding and irrevocable, then any vow a living being could make.

#legolas x y/n #legolas x reader #legolas x oc #legolas greenleaf #legolas #lord of the rings imagine #lord of the rings #orlando bloom

125 notes · View notes

a-casual-kpopfan · 8 months

Text

Concert Joy - Hyeju

You are uncomfortable.

“Oh my god, I can’t contain my excitement!”

“Me too! I’ve been waiting for this day for so long!”

It’s not as if you aren’t looking forward to the concert. Let it be known that you were one of the earliest people to book the tickets, right as the website opens. It’s just…

“Kya! I can’t wait! I’m going to see him up close!”

You bought the tickets so that you can come here and enjoy the music and live performances from one of your favorite artists, and not listen to almost 100 thousand people yelling their lungs out due to excitement.

If you had it your way, you would have been content to just stay at home and wait for some low-quality videos that will be uploaded later on YouTube. But things rarely ever go your way, well, at least when it comes to her.

“Isn’t this exciting, hun?” Directly to your right you can see your girlfriend’s excited face as she looks around in awe of the venue, and the numbers of people surrounding her.

“Well,” you take a few minutes to formulate an answer in your mind. “Partially. You do know I prefer somewhere quiet to enjoy music.”

“Don’t be such a party pooper.” Hyeju scrunches her face. “You can’t always hide inside the house; you need to go out and experience things like this as well.”

You hum at her answer, chuckling slightly. “You’re making me sound like I’m a shut in.”

“Well, you’re basically one.” Hyeju snickers, earning a flick on her forehead, courtesy of you. “Hey!”

“Am not. I just don’t like going to crowded place.”

“Yeah, yeah, whatever you say. But you must admit, this place is so huge.” Knowing that staying on the current topic might just bring your mood down, Hyeju diverts to a different one. “How many people can this place hold?”

“As of now, we have more or less 100 thousand people in the venue.”

“100 thousand people, just to see a single person perform…” Hyeju falls silent at the thought, seemingly thinking of something.

“What’s on your mind?” Seeing your excited girlfriend’s mood suddenly fall off worries you for a bit, especially when it’s her who wants to attend the concert in the first place.

“Nothing, really. It’s just” Hyeju pauses, looking around “I don’t know, I’m just jealous, in a way? Like, imagine 100 thousand people gathering in one place to see you perform, how would that feel I can’t even imagine.”

“Well, maybe you should have auditioned to become an idol back then.” You chuckle, waiting to see Hyeju’s elbow hitting your arm as per usual. But instead of that, you are met with a crestfallen Hyeju, who’s fidgeting with her hands.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it.” You lean against her, placing a soft kiss on top of her head along with your apology.

Hyeju remains silent, which worries you greatly since the girl has never let you off without a snarky comment of her own. Her silence speaks volume, and that means you fucked up.

Fortunately for you, it is right then that the concert started with the idol walking onto the stage, giving you an excuse to brighten Hyeju’s mood up.

-----

Your ears are in pain.

And not just your ears, you can feel your heart beating loudly to each beat of the music, which can be said a lot about your current state of being. Many associate that feeling with excitement, with enthusiasm and exhilaration.

But not for you, you feel suffocated, and overwhelmed. You feel exhausted from your heart beating so loudly, and you feel that your eardrums are ringing loudly, giving you fear that they might erupt at any given moment with all the yelling around you.

Surrounding you on all sides is a sea of excited people yelling their lungs out to cheer for the idol. your girlfriend included. It truly didn’t take much to cheer her up. One minute into the first song, and she is already singing along with her low, but warm voice that you can barely appreciate with all the other voices from the surrounding audience. Really now, why is it so hard for a guy to appreciate his girlfriend’s voice?

Of course, with all the loud music and yelling around you means that you can’t help but focus onto the performance itself instead of distractedly falling into your own thoughts like usual. While the performances are good, you can’t help but lament the fact that you can’t really hear it all that well with the yelling mixed in. You’ll have to watch it again on YouTube then.

But then, you glance to your side, seeing Hyeju genuinely enjoying her time at the concert, even if her yelling is one of the main causes giving your eardrums their ringing. If Hyeju is happy, you don’t really mind.

And so, you reign over your annoyances and enjoy the music and performances, since you have already paid for it.

Things are going well, that is, until….

“Kyaa!! Oppa!”

“Oppa! Notice me!”

“Oppa! Oppa!”

“I love you, oppa!”

Oh yeah, this.

As if the combined voice of 100 thousand people isn’t enough to deafen your ears, the cheering really takes things up another notch, with how random and chaotic they are.

It’s ok, it’s fine, you think to yourself. This is normal. Fans just really love their idols, you understand. You keep telling yourself that and just try to enjoy the music.

“Oppa! I love you!” You feel your heart drop as you hear Hyeju’s voice joining in with the cheering. Despite thinking rationally to yourself that this is normal, you can’t help but be shocked a bit.

How long did it take her to say it to you? How long did you have to wait to hear it from her own voice? And this idol just…gets to hear it? Like that?

Safe to say, the rest of the concert goes by with you hardly paying attention to the performances, feeling like a puppet whose strings were cut off.

-----

After a few hours later, you now find yourself back in the comfort of your bed, resting away from the long day. Well, as best as you can of course, because your mind seems to not want to give you a break.

Tossing and turning for a bit, you end up laying on your side, thinking back to the concert and the cheering that you’ve heard. Certainly, it isn’t uncommon to hear cheering like that. You have followed the idol scene enough to know that cheering can be considered somewhat common, so your girlfriend joining in the cheering should be normal. It is completely normal.

But why do you feel so disheartened still?

Letting out a sigh, you decide that it would be better to try and sleep than torment yourself further with useless questions that only serve to keep you awake at night. However, imagine your surprise when you feel a pair of arms wrapping around your torso, and a presence pressing against your back. Didn’t she fall asleep the moment she lay down on the bed?

“Did I wake you up?” You feel her head nodding against your back.

“I’m sorry. Let’s go to sleep now-” You hold onto her arm, rubbing it gently as she hugs your chest from behind “You were thinking something again, weren’t you?” Hyeju interrupts you, sounding not as sleepy as you thought.

“I’m sorry?”

“You were thinking of something. That’s why you weren’t asleep yet.” Before you have the chance to counter, Hyeju continues “It was the cheering, wasn’t it?”

“…” Hyeju hits the bullseye, making your tongue tied for a while.

Taking your silence as confirmation, she then rolls you onto your back as she leans her body up, resting her arms underneath her chin as her eyes look at you, smiling gently.

“I was caught up in the moments so much, I failed to realize that I hurt you unintentionally. I’m sorry.”

“You don’t have to apologize, it’s not your fault. I was just being dramatic, as usual.” You manage to say something, your hands reaching up stroke her messy hair gently. Hyeju leans slightly against your palm, humming a bit.

“You know. I realized something at the concert.” She says, with you raising an eyebrow as your response.

“You know people always say that idols are humans too, and that they deserve to be respected and not to be put on a pedestal.” You are losing her more and more as she goes on. “But a part of me believes that: being an idol means that you are already putting yourself on the pedestal to be admired by everyone, to show your best self to the whole world.”

“Uhm-” You are once again interrupted by Hyeju placing a finger on your lips.

“Shush, let me finish please.” You nod. “Thank you hun. So, what I was saying is that idols are meant to be admired and appreciated from afar. They do not know each one of their fans, and they can’t be blamed for that. You can love them all you want, but inevitably they can’t reciprocate it. Because they might not even know who you are.”

Hyeju head lowers down to your chest, her ears resting right above your heart, feeling every beat of it. “Me cheering for him like that doesn’t mean that I truly love him the way that I love you. I am not delusional enough to think that one day my favorite idol might notice me thanks to some random luck, and he magically falls for me. That just isn’t happening.” Her hand finds its way to yours, intertwining softly.

“The love I have for him, simply is the admiration and appreciation I have for him as a fan for all his music and effort. That’s it.” Her head is raised again, now hovering above your face, as you can feel her shoulder length tickling your face a bit, but you don’t mind, as you gaze into her eyes.

“Honey, the love I have for you, is indescribable. I love you with everything you do, no matter how big or small, no matter how smart or stupid.” She smiles, ever so gently. “With you, I can be myself wholly, without afraid of showing you my best or worst, because you’ve already seen and embraced me for who I am.” She lowers ever so slightly, your lips touching for a quick kiss. “An idol might never reciprocate the love I have for them, but you are different. When idols inevitably retire, new ones shall replace the old. But no one can ever replace you.”

“I love you, so, so much. I’m sorry for making you worried, but I’m also thankful that you indulged me so much.” Without waiting to hear your reply, she places her head at the crook of your neck, digging herself deeper into you.

“I love you too.” You finally process enough of her words to utter three words. Yet she can feel your sincerity. Of course, she can, she’s your girlfriend.

“That is obvious, stupid. Let’s get some sleep.”

Wordlessly, you embrace Hyeju, laying there listening to her breathing until it becomes even again, before managing to slip into sleep, your mind truly at ease.

What is but a few simple cheering when you already have her heart, and she yours? ~~~~~~

A/N: A little piece I wrote up for CKF and I hitting 2k followers recently, I will personally be taking a break from writing as life is catching up to me. I'm sure CKF can handle things without me for a little bit.

Till we meet again. - Ghost

#loossemble #ctdenm #son hyeju #hyeju #male reader #kpop fic #kpop x reader

227 notes · View notes