#one of these is abusive and terrible

[lanaevyssmoved]

one more thing

"i just don't see how it's less 'problematic' to say that you find astarion sexier as an unhealed abuse victim/abuser so you're going to go the ascendant route than it is to say you find astarion sexier when he's mentally underage."

is a terrifying sentence

#fray.txt #sexier when hes mentally underage? #jail #actual jail. #one of these is abusive and terrible #the other is jail

[hajihiko]

It runs in the family

#an art #super danganronpa 2 #sdr2 #fuyuhiko kuzuryu #peko pekoyama #Fuyupeko #Kuzupeko #Thinking about them and their terrible childhood today. Kind of terrible lives in general huh #Neither of them could help each other when things got dicey in the household #Peko because the Kuzuryūs are NOT afraid to 'discipline' her. Fuyuhiko because it literally only makes things worse. #Both of them because if they show off how close they are the agents might rethink keeping Peko around. So they grit their teeth and bear it #I somewhat hc that the parents also aren't above involving the other in a punishment. Like. #Fuyuhiko can take a beating but he hates seeing Peko be hurt. Same for her. So if they REALLY wanna beat a lesson into one of them.... ykno #BUT THATS SAD. SO I ADDED THE NICE PICTURE AFTERWARDS #Child abuse cw #Cw child abuse

[fluoresensitive]

I was thinking and I've come to the realization that people do not truly understand the damage that incest and rape does to you. They think they do, they think it's about forbidden romance and desire so strong that you can't help yourself but it's not. It's about control and power, about someone in a position over you deciding that your bodily autonomy and mental well-being come second to them. And it scares me that you can't say, "please do not sexualize abuse" without facing backlash on a website with this many survivors.

#the boys that raped me didnt do so because they were SOOOOO into me; they did it because they could and no one could stop them #victims of incest are not Dark Forbidden Romances; they are 10/9 children who are groomed and abused by terrible parents #i just think you guys are downright wicked xoxo

[samioli]

honestly. its very funny to me that finding out my father did a very bad thing like. 16 years after the fact made me grow to appreciate other takes on Manfred von Karma other than "he's an abusive monster"

me and franziska are shaking hands over here 🤝

#i just find it hilarious because i was one of those OH HES PROBABLY AN ABUSIVE MONSTER people #but now i realize not only is that take boring and bland #its also very unrealistic #as someone with an already complicated relationship with their father #and also finding out something that makes it even MORE complicated #like by 1000x #just listen to me when i say these things are insanely complex and not at all black and white #me 🤝franziska #'still having fond memories of our fathers despite knowing they did a terrible thing'

[ifbrd]

Weird Gravity Falls question:

As fans, we’re all aware that Filbrick sucked as a dad.

But do Stan and Ford understand that?

It seems obvious to us outside viewers, but I don’t exactly recall any comments by either senior Pines twin that would suggest they have connected those dots. I believe it’s fairly normal for children of abusive, neglectful or just simply bad parents to think their parent’s behavior was normal or that they deserved it or whatever, and in addiction to not being able to remember a moment where they admit their dad sucked, they certainly have both internalized his words.

Ford continued to pursue his education and was obsessed with academic excellence, as that seemed to be the one and only thing that made his father show him any kind of appreciation.

Stan continued to obsess over money, as his dad told him that was the only way he was allowed to return home. And let’s not forget his comment in the finale “dad was right, I am a screw up”

But again, and please please correct me if I’m wrong, I can’t think of anything either of them has said that criticizes their father’s actions. There’s the comment that he “wasn’t easily impressed” which I think more than anything, serves more as an excuse for his actions. Heck, in the flashback of Stan taking boxing lessons, I felt that whole scene was framed as Filbrick being a good dad, personally, I thought he was a good dad up until A Tale of Two Stans.

Idk I guess I just always assumed that after several decades they started to understand that Filbrick wasn’t a great dad, but it’s perfectly realistic for neither of them to have come to that conclusion, and frankly, the tiny bits of evidence from the show support this being the case.

I rambled a bit here, but what do you all think? Did I forget a moment that proves they do see their dad wasn’t a good dad? Do you think they have processed that part of their childhoods?

#gravity falls #tw: abuse #tw: neglect #stan pines #ford pines #stanford pines #stanley pines #filbrick pines #at this point I’m just imagining them thinking very neutrally about their dad #more like ‘yeah this wasn’t his finest moment but he was okay!’ #and then one day dipper and Mabel make some comment about how Filbrick sucked #and at first the Stans are like ‘excuse me that’s your great grandfather don’t talk about him like that’ #and then the kids just start listing all the terrible things Filbrick did #and it slowly starts dawning on Stan and ford #they start thinking ‘I would kill anyone who did any of that to dipper and Mabel why was it okay for dad to do that to us?’

[fromtheseventhhell]

It's crazy that people still uphold show!Sansa as a well-written character and pretend that liking her is the pinnacle of feminism when it would be infinitely more impactful to acknowledge her terrible and misogynistic writing. This is the same character who, while written by two men, was thankful for the abuse she suffered because it allowed her to grow. The same character who we had to be told was smart because the writers were too lazy to develop or show her intelligence. The same character who had to rely heavily on the men surrounding her and ended up accomplishing nothing on her own merit ( and no, thinking that she deserved to be Queen doesn't mean that she earned it). She is not well-written, she is not complex, and she is not a feminist character. Which is fine! If you enjoy her then good on you, but please stop pretending that she's something she isn't just because you feel the need to justify liking her character

#anti got #anti d&d #anti show sansa #anti sansa stans #like literally one of the worst written characters on that show because they tried so hard to make her the most important #while being entirely incompetent and their only method of doing so was to steal from other characters which ruined the plot #the only arguable achievement was defeating LF but even then it's written in the script that she had to go to Bran to explain things #/she rallied the Vale army!/ no she didn't 😭 she wrote a letter to LF and he did everything. instead of showing her arc in the Vale and #her learning about politics to rally them herself they took the quickest route to give her a /badass/ savior scene #which only ended up making her look selfish + power-hungry for putting her brothers' lives at risk for not telling anybody about said lette #and idiotic in the aftermath after relying once again on LF even though he was very obviously manipulating her #/pawn to player/ sounds catchy on paper but without seeing that growth/development it doesn't work #Arya was terribly written but at least we /saw/ her training in a way we never did with Sansa #and people try to apply this same logic to the books and think she's gonna suddenly spring forth as a political mastermind #when that's not how George writes...we see characters develop and make mistakes on page and get actual earned growth #feminism isn't defending the writing of two men who gave her a rape plot not in the books because they thought it was /interesting/ #when the only aspect of that plot they adapted was a woman suffering abuse :/ #and as per usual with stansas their only /evidence/ of her being well-written is accusing you of being misogynistic if you don't like her

[mergaliscious]

it's interesting how every trait that ppl use to demonize narcissists (except for the ridiculous ones to demonize that are actually harmless) is also very prevalent among the general population, especially among untraumatized and privileged individuals

like yeah, *some* narcissists are assholes, but the traits that make them assholes are extremely common among people who don't have NPD and were simply never told they have to care about other people

it's like neurotypicals/egotypicals will accept this sort of behavior *unless* it was developed as a coping mechanism. Like it's only bad if it's a symptom of mental illness. And fuck that.

#Oh you think you're better than others bc your parents told you being white makes you superior? #Well let's give you some education and space to learn and shame POC for not wanting to be around you! #Oh you think you're better than others because you've experienced horrific abuse and had to convince yourself you're special in order to... #Survive? Wow you must be a terrible person! /s #Idk if it's a good idea to tag this as narc safe #Bc while I am saying these arguments are bad I am still talking abt them #Also ftr the traits I mention in the parentheses are like... Being obsessed with ones reflection #I've seen that used to demonize narcissists but like who does it harm???

[the-withering-system]

How to have a mature conversation with parents about how you were treated as a child without them having a tantrum?

#did system #did osdd #dissociative identity disorder #dissociative system #bpd #borderline personality disorder #her favourite one is “I GUESS IM A TERRIBLE MOTHER” I mean you said it not me. but i gotta keep the peace ig #tw child abuse #just to be safe

[hedonistbyheart]

I have feelings about the way Wade lowkey panics when men touch him gently.

In the teamup comics he gets all awkward when Spidey hugs him and then makes a lewd joke that "ruins it" as Spidey says. In the second movie he goes "haha what are you doing?" In this very airy, confused tone when Cable pats him on the chest to place the skee-ball token over his heart.

He doesn't even joke about copping a feel or anything, he just doesn't know how to react to touch from men that isn't threatening and it makes me sad.

Spidey's hug is an obviously conciliatory gesture, he's apologizing and thanking Wade. Cable's gesture seems to be brazing and supportive, when you don't know what he's doing, but both gestures are so inconceivable to Wade, because they're nice to him, that he's just left baffled.

#deadpool #wade wilson #deadpool meta #Wade has so many terribly sad layers okay #and I'm fascinated that this reaction is consistent across media #I think he generally expects and accepts abuse in his relationships with everyone but I think he expects less overt violence from women #his self-esteem is so bad that it doesn't occur to him that he can have nice things #and then if you're the one actively needling people at least you control the violence #goddamn he's tragic

[mother-of-houseplants-2]

while i'm on my fiona-as-monica-stand-in bullshit:

monica being like "i get it. i know what it's like. i was once where you are right now." IS INSANE TO ME???? MA'AM THAT'S YOUR DAUGHTER???? HELLO??? and then -

fiona's sad little smile as monica says "you have no idea how bad it is" BECAUSE SHE DOES KNOW. SHE KNOWS IT ALL TOO WELL. BUT THEN????

the fact that it's LIP who says "try me" ???? I'M GOING INSANE. FIONA AND LIP AS MONICA AND FRANK PARALLELS/STAND-INS IS KILLING ME. AND IT DOESN'T END THERE????

fiona going "i know how he treated you" because he treats her the same way im !!!!!!!! and THEN!!!!

the fact that she ACKNOWLEDGES that she was forced into this role by his negligence/abuse AND HER ABANDONMENT, the fact that she outright says "i'm not his wife. YOU ARE," the fact that she TELLS MONICA "YOUR LEAVING MADE ME HAVE TO STEP INTO YOUR SHOES. YOU LEFT YOUR CHILDREN AND MADE ME THEIR MOTHER. YOU LEFT YOUR HUSBAND AND MADE ME HIS WIFE."

i'm on the ground.

#fiona gallagher #fiona gallagher’s childhood #fiona and her kids #fuck frank all my homies hate frank #fuck monica gallagher all my homies hate monica gallagher #fiona and monica #being terrible parallels of one another #the implications of this scene are driving me crazy #what do you MEAN you know what your daughter is going through with her father because it's just like what you went through with your husban #why would you SAY this #frank and monica i'm coming for your blood #tw abuse mention #sort of #parentification #shameless meta #normal things that normal people say to their kids

[ghostlynimbus]

Billy and Steve start hanging out and Billy starts noticing that Steve doesn't know how to do a lot of basic stuff, and the stuff he does know how to do he does weird.

At first Billy dismisses these observations as being a product of Steve having grown up rich, like.. of course Steve doesn't know how to change the oil on his car, he can afford to take the thing in regularly and pay someone else to do it. But the more they spend time together the more Billy realizes that thats not quite right.

The Harrington's have a shiny fancy working dishwasher (Billy knows it works, he's seen Henderson use it). But Steve always washes dishes by hand.

And it's definitely not that Steve is just some weirdo who likes hand washing dishes, he clearly hates doing it, but he still never uses the dishwasher.

And going grocery shopping with Steve is an actual nightmare, Billy thought he hated shopping with Max (who somehow always convinces him to buy her shit she doesn't need), but Steve... Steve makes shopping with Max seem well worth the wasted money.

The way he meanders about the store, flitting back and forth between the aisles and constantly doubling back to get something else that was right next to something he grabbed twenty minutes ago is absolutely incomprehensible to Billy. A shopping trip that would take Billy twenty minutes, even with Max tagging along, takes Steve at least an hour.

Billy also pretty quickly learns that if anyone ever points out any of these oddities, Steve will react in one of two ways.

Either he'll try and brush it off and downplay the whole situation or he'll get extremely prickly and defensive about it.

Billy does not understand, but the puzzle of it all fascinates him.

It's not until one time when Steve's parents come back early from a business trip that it finally clicks.

Billy had been staying the night, eager for more time with Steve and time away from Neil. He was supposed to be long gone by the time Mr and Mrs Harrington got back, but apparently their plans had changed last minute.

Billy woke to an empty bed, and Steve's empty bedroom, and had made his way downstairs just in time to accidentally catch the tail end of Steve's father berating him for apparently doing the laundry incorrectly.

It was clear Steve's dad had already been talking for a while, and the part that Billy caught was too long by itself.

And in all that time and with all those words Mr Harrington had for his son it was clear that not one of them were any sort of instructions on how to correct the mistake, no hint of how to do it right next time.

When Steve finally emerged from his father's study, looking so resigned (at least until he noticed Billy then he looked embarrassed), it was clear to Billy that this was Mr Harringtons usual way of handling such matters.

And that was when Billy finally understood that the reason Steve didn't know how to do basic things, or did them in weird incomprehensible ways, was because no one had ever taught him. They'd just expected him to start doing these things and then gotten mad when he didn't manage to do them to unspecified standards.

Months later, when Billy and Steve have moved into their own shitty tiny little apartment downtown, Billy starts showing Steve how to do shit. It's hard, trying to toe the line between gentle instruction and patronizing, especially since they both have so little experience with gentle but eventually, despite the times it blows up in their faces and one of them stomps off somewhere to cool off, they get better at it.

And as it turns out, Steve can actually be pretty good at all sorts of stuff as long as someone bothers to teach him.

#harringrove #steve harrington #billy hargrove #stranger things #ficlet #abuse cw #not a mr and mrs harrington friendly post #its like one am and i just wrote this on my phone without editing it sorry if its terrible #other characters are mentioned

[pharaohbean]

due to a. number of reasons (including but not limited to breakdowns on multiple bodily levels [emotionally i want to cry but mentally i cannot and therefore i only cry for about 5s physically which is Not Enough]) i am currently seeking fluff (sfw only!!) for my ships (tagged). can be on tumblr or ao3 or whatever- tumblr pls dont let me down /lh

comment or reblog with links or titles! im not afraid to go searching lol

#zero thoughts #a genuine earnest plea for happiness in this moment #idc if in like 10hrs ill be over this atm i am due for a cryfest and i am Not Getting It #puzzleshipping #(blind also works but i prefer puzzle) #narumitsu #wrightworth #akitoya #polysquad #chilumi #dancae #caeheng #also purely platonic/qprs for any of these also works!!! (+ other ships can be involved in background) #mostly i just want fluff from these guys #am i abusing my power with tags? probably #do i care? no #/lh #its so late rn ignore my terrible english (ehich is my native language) #edit: forgot one more #wriolette #neuvithesley

[shummthechumm]

bumble wc is just a piece of writing from this series that TRULY astounds me. like the characters do not acknoledge that shes a living person whatsoever once she becomes a "nuisance" (she is fat and a house pet). and on top of that, to have turtle tail turn her back on her as well??>?? because gray wing has it bad for her and so we have to exterminate the "obstacle" in the way of their straight romance???

like i expect gray wing and clear sky to be dicks but..why would TURTLE TAIL rationally allow her friend (who lived through the same abuse as she) be shunned away from the moor group??

its some of the most mean spirited shit in this entire series and it only exists as a plotline...for what reason??? cause "kittypets are bad you dont want to be a kittypet"?? its not like you remind us every fucking arc erin hunter. because we're supposed to like gray wing and they really wanted him to serve as an adoptive parent to turtle's litter?? like..what???

i dont even have a real point to this post i just want to express my confusion cause what even was the goal. it does nothing but make the entire cast abuse-enabling discriminatory assholes who are willing to send outsiders to easily preventable deaths. and we're supposed to agree with these jackasses??? ERIN HUNTER WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY TO YOUR ELEMENTARY SCHOOL AUDIENCE???

#domestic abuse tw #abuse tw #wc #again no real point i was trying to make here #dotc as a whole floors me in how incompetent it is. #'oots is the worst arc' who?? #the only one worst than dotc imo is tnp because thats where a lot of shitty trends in this series were created or exacerbated #like i can point at gray wing being a shitty sad boy protag but if i REALLY wanted to blame someone...tnp came first... #im sure if crow was made a pov he would also be as terrible as bramble in that arc #also tom getting a redemption death AFTER getting turtle tail killed is hilariously terrible. #like yeah we killed turtle tail off to service a male char's arc because shes a woman #but we chose to fridge bumble because she was a woman AND a kittypet. and fat. #shummy screaming into the void

[seventh-district]

OCD will literally remove your brain's ability to register when a task is Complete and then create 10,000 incredibly ridiculous and extremely specific rules for you to follow in every single aspect of your life (to keep you safe, of course, it tells you.) and then tells you that if you don’t do them Correctly and Completely every single time it tells you to (it tells you countless times per day) then the Entire Fucking World Will End and then it’ll do this fucked up thing where it makes you believe that nonsense.

and then people that don’t have it will make silly little jokes about being soooooo OCD and make t-shirts with fun little acronyms on them like Obsessive Coffee Disorder and tell you how much they like it when things are organized and clean, too!!

and then you’re supposed to just. laugh. like you haven’t been robbed of your entire being and potential and been taken over by a mind and life altering disability

#PSA: don’t fucking tell me to Seek Therapy or Try Medication. i am Aware. i have Tried. it isn’t that fucking simple #and this is my blog. i’ll complain about my illnesses all i want to. if you don’t like it i strongly encourage you to unfollow me #ocd #actually ocd #cw ocd #cw mental illness #mental health stuff #Seven.txt #Obsessive Compulsive Disorder is actually SO goddamn insidious. and only ppl that have lived with it will understand that #it’s a terrible terrible thing. to have something ruin your entire life under the guise of keeping you safe #it’s like being abused by your own mind and i don’t say that lightly #okay. stopped crying long enough to get this post out of my brain and onto my blog #gonna put Walking Disaster on loop and return to my Mental Illness Floor Time now #if no one hears from me for a little while it’s not personal i just. need to not be a Person right now. i’m so tired

[fernlessbastard]

hot take moment cwilbur is literally just psychotic as all hell and i think people got way too comfortable villianizing the shit out of a man who was clearly portraying signs of severe mental illness. cwilbur was like im so fucking paranoid and scared and i think everyone is out to get me and hurt me and ive spiralled to the point i cant reach out to the people closest to me because im so afraid and lost in this spiral and im having constant panic attacks and hurting myself because i dong know what to do with myself and the only way out for me is to die. and everybody was like EVIL MAN WHO ENJOYS HURTING OTHERS AND IS ABUSIVE ON PURPOSE AND A VILLAIN AND SHOULD NEVER BE TRUSTED AGAIN. and then he came back and was like im still deeply troubled and afraid but im desperately trying to make up for the wrongs i did in the past and the people i hurt in my own way and communication is really hard for me but i hope people know that im truely sorry and i love them. im going to try my hardest to fix this in the only way i know how and then respectfully remove myself from the situation because i feel thats the kindest thing i can do to the people ive hurt. and people were like ABUSER ABUSER ABUSER EVIL MAN ABUSER. like girl

Yeah no based true real no questions asked

I'd hope I manage to portray Wilbur the way he deserves in my content, cause that man is heavily bpd coded and he just needs therapy and someone who genuinely loves him but also can handle his bullshit (which has exclusively and reliably been Quackity like, canonically)

But yeah no completely agreed. The man has issues and has definitely fucked up a lot but at the end of the day he really does need love and care and patience, but also boundaries (and therapy and meds, obviously)

#i deeeefinitely have no reason to have strong feelings about bpd bitches deserving love and care and stability ha ha nooo it's definitely- #-not like I've been dating one for well over 4 years now and even though we've been through so much shit together and I still can't- #-understand why people with bpd and conditions that have similar symptoms are so demonised. It just makes no sense to me. #my bf is the love of my life and i can't imagine /not/ supporting it through all the splitting and episodes and all of that cause they're- #-absolutely worth everything #i don't know not to be too gay on main but tbf it's too late now anyway i think-- #is it unstable? sure. but it's also the most caring and loving person i've ever been close with and it always makes sure i'm ok #and it loves me so undeniably deeply no matter what purely for who i am #i've never had anyone care about me this much and this genuinely and this unconditionally - it'd always be what /they/ can get out of /me/ #but my boyfriend just cares about me - the actual me - no matter if i'm acting how it imagined i'd act. what matters is if i'm /me/ #listen bpd isn't sunshine and rainbows - we've been through some TERRIBLE shit (including s-cide attempts) #but when people claim it makes a relationship toxic/abusive it's so stupid cause ultimately with mutual love support and reassurance- #-and professional help you can have a genuinely happy and healthy life with someone with bpd #love isn't mean to be easy. it's meant to be safe and supportive and genuine but a relationship always takes effort and work on both sides #you should never sacrifice your well being of course! #but when love takes effort and extra care it doesn't inherently mean it's unhealthy or toxic or abusive. it just means you're people. #tldr if you love someone then don't care about some diagnosis - care about the actual perso. #ask #asks #ask fern #tntduo #dsmp #tnt duo #wilbur soot #quackity #quackbur #dream smp #tntblr #c!quackbur #c!tntduo

[sunderberry]

i like drawing these two. their designs are fun. i think it's the fluff, the heart motifs, and the stupid hats. and also their size difference

the bottom two are sort of like "what if valentino owned husk" ideas

#hazbin hotel #hazbin husk #hazbin valentino #valentino #husk #obligatory “i don't condone val's actions i just like his design and antagonistic role in the story” tag #idk if i should tag this as ship amd tbh i don't think they even have a ship tag #i just like the size difference. husk holding val's arm like a child #i have a lot of thoughts about the “val owns husk's soul” au actually #it isn't a swap au. val still owns angel #yes val is his canon levels of abusive self and husk has a terrible time #angel and husk are acquaintances. they are friendly with each other but val keeps angel on too tight a leash #husk isn't very important to val. he brings in enough clients that he's allowed to just exist in the background #maybe one day husk stumbles across a broken angel and can't help but clean him up and tend to his wounds #they could become proper friends #though neither would be in the right place to even consider a relationship #i just really like it when husk's heart is too big for his own good #i imagine valentino would start being worse with husk once he finds out he and angel are friendly #there's only so much i can go into the au on tumblr unfortunately #sun art #oh yeah in the second pic yes his wings are clipped :)