Cinediario 2023 - luglio
Red Road (2006) Andrea Arnold
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আমাদের বিচ্ছেদ চলে যাচ্ছে রেড রোড দিয়ে সোজা,
একটাই তো মানুষ যাকে সারাটা জীবন ধরে খোঁজা |
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been on a serious andrea arnold kick lately I've watched wasp, red road and fish tank and I might rewatch american honey (my FAVE) her films are just so comforting despite the harsh subject matters, maybe because I relate in a way. she often makes films about young women, coming of age and the horrors that come with it, and her naturalistic style makes her films feel so real and like you're watching real people. red road was seriously so memorable and uncomfortable she just has this way of portraying her characters as real, flawed, fucked up yet still sympathetic. god i could rant about how much I love her films all day
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Paved in Crimson. The Rich Deep Red Street.
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The hairpin bend between Chao Lao and Paknam Khaem Nu has been reshaped, newly asphalted and now painted red. Unsure how this will be in rain it's very steep and a tight corner
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If I had a nickel every time an Andrea Arnold film had the Cha Cha Slide playing in this bleak run down working class pub that represents the female lead's desperate cling to contentment I'd have two nickels
Which isn't a lot but strange it happened twice you know?
Wasp (short)-2003
Red Road (feature)-2006
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Two things happened today:
My sponsee is moving back to Toronto. She has changed my life this past yr. I am very grateful to her. I also see her as a friend. I get teary saying goodbye, but its not goodbye. Doing step work with her helped me stay sober. She's also worldy, which is rare in Saskatoon, so I loved our conversation and banter, esp on film and art. She gifted me some traditional Chinese medicines since she knows that I work with indigenous medicines. It was very thoughtful. I'm going to miss her.
Second thing, my reservation was having a Christmas thing, and I didn't want to go but had to. My bio family was gonna be there and I am not on speaking terms with them. I saw them. It was awkward. My nephew took a step away from me. I was hurt because him, and my other nieces and nephews are growing up without me, and most likely do not recognize me. Anyway, later tonight, my oldest cousin msg'd me saying my nephew thought I was my youngest sister who died, and he was trying to comprehend seeing me as her, but then he did remember who I was. So my older cousin said I needed to start spending more time with her kids so I can be in their life. I replied that I'd love that.
And I'm grateful because I'm sober, and I can trust myself to be consistent, sincere and present. Also, not so damn irritable because I have a sense of inner peace lately. Everyone be struggling through the holiday but I have a subtle conviction to my healing journey so I've been fine lately and it seems like I'm able to show up for others to help em get through their own. This mostly because I understand grief and holidays and have worked through my ish.
Anyway, relations are messy and deep, but they're worth navigating through. I had to come to an acceptance that people come and go, it doesn't mean I am unworthy or unlovable, its just how it flows with people. Today was a big day. ♡
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