Some self-indulgent Rottmnt! Raph x reader because I'm bored and projecting and had a Moment™ earlier.
Reader is a pale fox, agender and transmasc btw, although not much of it comes up besides species.
'This is gonna be great!' I think to myself as I trek through the dark and damp sewers, purposefully ignoring the small puddles splashing around my boots and holding my bushy tail off the ground. 'I'm going to get to spend the night with my boyfriend, at my boyfriend's house, and meet his family! Shit did i wear the right outfit?' I ask myself as my paws pat down my shirt. 'I mean, it's a plain black turtleneck shirt and my fancy schmancy green jeans, you can't go wrong with that! And i made sure my earrings are the nice matching stud ones too!' My right paw moves once again to feel up long pointed ears, claws catching on the three metal studs on each side, while the other stays wrapped tight around the strap of my plain black duffel bag. 'Yeah, I'll be fine!'
'Did i put all my earrings in? what if one closes up during dinner or something or they're lopsided? did i remember to pack pyjamas that are decent? God please don't tell me I packed two shirts instead of a shirt and pants again. what if my mascara runs? or my eyeliner? fuck did i smudge it on the way down?' I glance over the side of my hand as i keep moving. Luckily i don't see any dark streaks in the pale tan fur. 'Oh okay nevermind. no black streaks, we're all good there at least.'
I barely have time to continue my spiraling train of thought before I reach where I was instructed to go. I pulled out my blocky red phone to shoot Raph a text to let him know I arrived. I couldn't see this supposed door and i didn't wanna just barge in either way.
Me: Hey, I'm outside! 💚
RedRover❤️: Oh okay!! I'll be right there love!
I started rocking back and forth on my heels while i waited the minute or two before the supposed door swung open. There, holding open the hidden, round, cement door stood my beloved partner. light poured out from behind the barrier and surrounded him in a halo of sorts. 'God, why does he always have to look ethereal?'
"Hey Red! you look nice as ever." a warm, fuzzy feeling couldn't be ignored at the compliment. seriously, how does he do this shit??
"Hello, also Red! you look stunning, love." i respond back without skipping a beat, making us both try to hold in peals of laughter at the matching names. It was almost stupid how easily it worked. they were our signature colors either way! What with his red bandana and the red markings in my fur, it wasn't a hard conclusion to come to.
As soon as we both collect ourselves, which takes a minute or two, he steps to the side to let me past. the sudden anxiety hits me worse then it did getting ready or even walking down here. I hold out my hand a little, a nonverbal ask to hold his hand, and he almost immediately scoops it into his larger one.
"Are you sure they'll like me..?" the words come out quiet, almost inaudible to even my ears, but he still catches them.
He squeezes my hand reassuringly. "they'll love you, Red. i just know it."
-----
He, infact, did not 'just know it'.
So far, everyone except the orange one, named Mikey, the spider yokai, Big Mama,.and the human girl, April, has a avoided making direct eye contact or speaking to me as much as they can. maybe it's first time awkwardness, maybe it's jitters, maybe they just don't like me.
The dinner table was just big enough to fit all of us, which was nice, and was laid out with bowls and plates. I'd offered to help set it earlier, but the blue one, Leo, had only shooed me away. tomato soup and grilled cheese was laid out, and now I feel like I dressed too fancy. God i look ridiculous, a blank spot in a sea of color.
Leo and the purple one, his twin Donnie, sat side by side as far away from me as possible, both their fathers and their mother seeming to follow suit. Raph sits to my left, April to my right and Mikey between her and Donnie. The other human, CJ or Casey, sat between Raph and Draxum. This left Big Mama sandwiched between Splinter and Draxum.
"Bone apple teeth!" Mikey calls, making everyone groan or giggle, before grabbing up the soup pot and ladle to pass around. I ultimately decide to try to wait until everyone else has gotten theirs so I'm not rude, but my plan is foiled when Raph notices my tenseness and scoops some into my bowl before reaching over me to pass to April.
Across the table i can see Leo lean towards his twin and whisper something. Both of them whisper heatedly for a few minutes and occasionally break eye contact to glare in my general direction, which only serves to make me want to shrink in on myself.
The urge to shrink in on myself only got stronger as dinner wore on, but luckily Mikey must've picked up on it. He kept up a slow and nice gentle conversation between the table, asking about everyone's day and basic info from me. Eventually everyone became wrapped up in their own seperated convos and left just me and Mikey talking, scooting and leaning back since April sat between us.
"So! what's your favorite color and why?"
"hmm.. green. It's very calming and it matches nicely with my fur, especially darker greens! very nature-y."
"OOOO! that's a good one! mines orange, obviously! it's a very warm, happy color and i love that!"
"Man you're reason is even better!" quiet giggling breaks out between us for a few seconds. "okay, okay! what's your favorite.. hobby?"
"oh definitely painting or baking! yours?"
"hard to choose really, either watching movies or listening to music."
"lame, man!" his words were harsh if his tone wasn't teasing.
as our conversation continued I could faintly make out remarks from the other side of the table over the other conversations. CJ, the other human, and Draxum, the other dad, were talking about school i think. Raph, Big Mama, and April were gossiping and arguing semantics. and the twins were whispering again.
Eventually Leo slammed his hands on the table and stood up. everyone had been done eating for a while now, but the sudden movement drew everyone's attention. The tense atmosphere was back, not as strong as earlier, but still there.
Without a word Leo gathered his and Donnie's dishes and left, presumably to clean up. everyone soon followed suit.
"I can get yours if you want." I offered to no one in particular, but Mikey, Raph and Splinter all took me up on the offer. As i made my way towards the kitchen hushed voices flowed out and immediately halted when I turned the corner. Glares followed me as i made my way to the sink, pointedly ignoring them, and rinsed the dishes quickly, ready to get out of their hair.
Instead, both turtles left and I decided to just finish the dishes to be polite. 'I wanna make a good impression so pleaseeeeee let this help.'
Turns out, the dishes didn't take very long and by the time I was heading back out it'd only been a few minutes.
By the time I was out there, movie night had been set up. Everyone was piled onto the floor to watch a Jupiter Jim movie and passing around a communal popcorn bowl, as Raph had told me earlier when we made the plans. Quickly and quietly i moved to sit next to Raph, snuggling my left side into his as everyone settled. About halfway into the movie Raph got a text and excused himself, as did Leo and Donnie. After a few minutes I decided to get up too, to get some water and refill the communal popcorn bowl, which was now reduced to unpopped kernels that CJ and Mikey kept eating. April snagged and handed me the bowl once i offered and I departed.
There was talking as i walked down the hall towards the kitchen, and i tried my best to ignore it so i wouldn't be rude.
unfortunately, my ears picked up a conversation i wasn't meant to hear.
"oh come on Raph! you brought a canine, a predator, into a house full of prey, and three other predators, and expect nothing bad to happen? what if theyre a villain? or lose it and return to their basic instincts? what then, huh?!"
'what is going on?'
"what? Leo, what do you mean basic instincts?"
"He means, dear Raphaella, returning to a predator mindset. seeing our family as either prey or competition. what do you expect us to do then?"
'oh..?'
"basic instincts dont affact anything, De-"
"Oh really?? explain that to your chirps and churrs and your savage episodes. explain that to Mikey hiding in his shell instinctively when threatened. Explain that to Donnie and I swimming often and our strange diets. WE have basic instincts too Raph, the only reason they don't affect our lives is because we aren't predators!"
'oh. okay.'
I stormed around the corner now, bowl still in hand and tears welling in my eyes. anger burning bright behind them. "You know what? fuck you! I've tried all. night! to prove I'm not some vicious fucking predator and you still accuse me of being one when I'm not even fucking there! I'm!- I'm.." the bowl slipped from my fingers, clanging loudly onto the floor.
horrified looks sat on everybody's faces in varying degrees. Donnie looked shocked I'd been there at all, Raph looked upset and pitying, and Leo.. he looked like i was about to murder him.
a small choked sob escaped me once i realized what I'd done. tears rolled down my face and effectively dragged my makeup with them. they didn't trust me, or love me or even like me. they see me as a monster. because of my stupid species. okay then, sure, fine. that's fine I'm fine everything is fine.
I began speed walking down the hall I'd came from, looking for a escape or place to hide. 'I'm such a fucking coward. running and hiding instead of letting them say anything. God this is pathetic, I'm letting my boyfriend fight my battles for me after i scared the shit out of his family because i just can't handle it. stupid stupid stupid.'
I hadn't realized I'd walked through the back of the silent living room, movie paused on the wall, or passed a frantic Mikey jogging down the hall towards the kitchen while absorbed in my thoughts, nor did I realize the yelling starting again and getting louder. all i could focus on was the "basic instinct" to get the fuck out of there.
Eventually, after a minute or two of twisting halls, I found a bathroom. perfect spot to hide, i guess.
I gently closed and locked the door behind me, not wanting to draw any more negative attention to myself. I flicked on the light, only to decide it was way too bright and turn it off in favor of the dim lamp on the counter.
The bathroom was a light green in color, with black and white checkered floors, which was nice i suppose. it didn't soothe my nerves but it provided a comforting atmosphere in a way. something that told me "its okay, let it all out" in its own little way. The bathtub was covered in a black curtain and looked inviting. I gently shifted the curtain aside as I started to hyperventilate, sitting myself in the tub. The quiet was soothing at first, but eventually it only made the bathroom into an echo chamber, making my thoughts bounce around my head in a quickening spiral.
It felt like an eternity before the knocking started. My sobbing only got worse, and louder in turn, which made the thing, person, call out. I couldn't process what was being said. I wanted to tell it to go away, to leave me in peace, but the words were stuck in my throat. my face was buried into my knees as i tightened my curl into upright fetal position, tears drenching my jeans knees worse then they already were. the knocking stopped as a few voices began talking outside followed by two sets of footsteps padding away. Light flooded the bathroom not long after and I shrunk in on myself further, curling my tail around myself to be as small as I could.
Footsteps echoed around the walls and the curtain was pulled aside as an unconscious growl built in my throat. When the voice started talking, my head snapped up, lips pulled up to bear my fangs and eyes wild. the thing, Orange one, jumped back in fear before backing, terrified, out of the room and closing the door. 'goddamnit this is only proving their point. i am a monster. i am i am i am i am i am.'
the same two words continued to float around my head until frantic, heavy running came down the hall and the door was thrown open again. My fur puffed up and my claws came out even more, only serving to make this feeling worse. My heartbeat was pounding in my ears and i couldn't hear anything else for a moment. Then the door was closed, something soft was sat down somewhere, and the light from the hall left, but the new thing didn't leave. the curtain was again pulled open, but much slower this time. 'I really fucked up and scared someone haven't I.. goddamnit! stupid stupid stupid stupid!'
the curtain finally revealed the figure. Tall and dark green with red patterns and fabric. I knew him, i felt safe with him. my fur didn't lay back, but the growing growl stopped and i could hear something other than my heartbeat again.
"hey hey.. easy there, you're okay, Red, Raph's gotcha.. you're fine.."
gentle hands wiggled under my arms and lifted me from my spot in the tub, holding me like a wet kit, before he stole my spot. I almost began growling again, how dare he steal my spot?, before i was placed slowly in his lap facing him.
A large, gentle hand began to smooth my fur, softly pushing it back down, as another hand cupped my face. His thumb moved to push away tears and smooth fur there too. My thoughts stopped their spiraling as i finally processed everything.
'This is, was, my boyfriend, sitting in his bathtub with me, trying to soothe me from.. whatever that whole ordeal was, and somehow not mad at me..'
As if he could hear the question in my head, he began to speak. "It's not your fault, Red. Nobody's mad at you, I'm not mad at you. And I'm not scared of you either, I can practically see you thinking it, and you've gotta know that I'm not scared of you. I don't think i ever will be scared of you a day in my life. what happened out there wasn't your fault, you're gonna be okay.. it's all gonna be okay.." as if my sobbing rubbed off on him, Raph started to tear up too.
I practically threw myself into his plastron, clinging tightly to him as the, now dry, sobs wracked my body. His hand that had been cupping my face was now gently sitting on the back of my head while that hand that'd been essentially petting me never stopped it's work. Our crying dyed down after what felt like forever, but neither of us dared to move for a while longer.
"a-are you gonna l-leave me?" i asked with a wobbly voice, still on the teetering edge of crying again.
"what? no! of course I'm not leaving you Red!" his voice was almost offended i asked, but somehow pitying too.
"b-but-" i wanted to argue that he should. I'm as dangerous as they claimed, I'll only hurt.
"uh-uh, no buts. I'm not leaving and that's final." i was pulled tighter into his plastron as the petting stopped. "i won't go unless you want me to, and even then I'll always be here for you. capishce?" the hold softened as he leaned back, trying to get a good look at my face.
".. capishce."
comfortable silence fell once again l, just until i could breathe right and stopped shaking, before he spoke again.
"Do you wanna get cleaned up and try again?"
"mm-mm", i hummed while shaking my head no against his chest.
"why not, Red?"
".. they hate me."
"oh Red.. they don't hate you-"
"yes they do! you heard what they said, you saw how- how scared Leo looked when I yelled!"
"they don't hate you Red. They don't. please, trust me. they don't hate you, we can try this again and get it right this time. if it doesn't work out then I won't force it, but i think you all might've just gotten off on the wrong foot."
".. okay"
i slowly worked to separate myself from him as he stood up, helping me up in the process. I squeezed my eyes closed and turned on the light. and when I reopened them holy shit it was bad.
eyeliner and mascara made black tear tracks through pale fur, most of my cheek fluff was laying flat and wet, my nose was running a little and when i glanced at Raph it only made me laugh a little. his plastron had a big wet spot right in the middle of it, complete with mascara smears.
Raph almost immediately brightened at my laughter and began laughing too. "gods we look stupid," i managed to get out between breathes, "so what's the plan, tiger?"
"whatever you wanna do, love. we can go to your place, or stay here or whatever."
"... can I get changed into pyjamas before we try again? please?"
Raph took a minute to jokingly inspect my outfit before agreeing. my knees were itchy from the tear soaked jeans and my shirt felt a lil too tight around my neck right now to be comfortable.
Somehow i hadn't realized the duffel Raph had brought with him and set on the toilet, maybe because he was standing infront of it but whatever. I walked behind him to the bag and got changed in the shower. the shorts and tank top were comfortable, but thank god i brought makeup wipes.
-----
The second meeting was much better, but not a perfect success. Donnie didn't mind me much anymore, but Leo still seemed to hate me a lil. That was fine, I could live with that, It was my fault.
Everyone was settled back in the living room, ready for a different movie. a vote was held and, after a lot of yelling, Piss in Boots; The Last Wish was chosen. Raph and I volunteered to go make new popcorn and dipped within the first 5 minutes.
It was not just popcorn. there were drinks for each person, and pop tarts for Donnie and Mikey, and fruit for Mikey, and applesauce for Leo, and chocolate for the humans, and dry ramen noodles for Splinter and Raph.
"You want anything specific, love?" Raph asked, his back to me as he leaned to reach the top of a cabinet while i dropped into a crouch to gather drinks from the cooler.
"I'm okay! thanks though!" I lied through my teeth, I'd done enough, i would be good anyways. I apparently got caught eyeing the ramen and fruit though.
"mhm.. sure." another ramen packet was added to the pile and another handful of fruit was thrown into the bowl.
the food was hauled back to the living room, and my skills from being a waiter set in. i had 2 drinks in each hand, caught between my fingers in a odd way, and two bowls balanced on each arm, one popcorn and one fruit. somehow nothing fell. I actually got a little applause out of Mikey and a laugh from somewhere in the room.
By the time everyone had their snacks we were, like, 20 mins into the movie. everyone was content and, after delivering the go go squeeze and a pepsi to Leo he even seemed to mellow out a bit. everyone was happy and fine, it would all be okay. especially if Raph would get the stupid mascara off his plastron. (whish he totally failed to do in the bathroom, by the way!) Mikey passed fruit around with the popcorn and, apparently, nobody ate it except Donnie, April and I, everyone else was too focused on the movie or their own snacks.
comfortable and safe, I leaned over to April and asked "psst, what'd we miss?"
"ohh okay! so, basically"..
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