#root cause of feelings

[world-prayers]

Lack Of Self-Awareness? How To Be More Self-Aware

To be Self-Aware is the foundation of a happy and fulfilling life. When aware of our strengths, weaknesses, thoughts, feelings, and motivations, we can better make choices aligned with our values and goals. Having an angel by our side can help us conquer our own lack of self-awareness. Call Forth, An Angelic Helper Continue reading Untitled

View On WordPress

#Angel #angelic assistance #become self-aware #blind spots #creativity #decision-making #healthy coping mechanisms #how to become self-aware #how to improve self-awareness #impulses #inner wisdom #intuition #lack of self-awareness #limiting beliefs #maximize opportunities #negative emotions #overcome challenges #patterns of thought and behavior #resilience #root cause of feelings #self-aware #Self-awareness #true potential

[hoaxghost]

Some File Recovery demon lore! Feat a rather unfortunate example

Angels outnumbered The Fallen by a great deal so many demons resorted to splitting themselves off to boost numbers. Many also took this root to essentially end their conscious, a thing that is rarely ever allowed for immortal beings such as them.

Splits are essentially their own people, the more simpler way I could prob describe this method is 'Reverse 2048'

Also a fun lil fact but Stolforns and Sezzi are of the same Split tree, with the latter often calling the other his brother.

#my ocs #File recovery #demon oc #demon lore #body horror #also outside of pronouns split-demons will often refer to eachother with more gendered terms #Curser and Rico n Vera are all Splits with varying complex relations to their status #Even stolforn collecting halos is in cause of his interest in angels and how his root was one..only one degree of separation #but also splits are still barred from entering heaven or seeking redemption so many conflicting feelings there

[houseswife]

house: this has absolutely nothing to do with wilson

also house: [brings up wilson unprompted] [spends 95% of the session either talking about wilson or deliberately avoiding talking about wilson] [literally admits it’s about wilson]

#yes they set it up as though the true root cause was cuddy in the end #but I beg you to consider that 1) house agreed to seriously unpack his feelings of rejection re: wilson in relation to his exacerbated #drinking & the bar fight #and 2) the patient of the week deliberately evoked moments from house’s head/wilson’s heart #with particular emphasis on the brain surgery #which was the one time that wilson ever put house second to someone else #specifically a girlfriend #AKA the exact curveball that house has just been thrown for a second time (albeit in a less grave context) #nolan suggests that house punished the patient’s husband the way he’s punishing himself because they’re both losing someone they love #yes we could assume that his alcoholism was made worse by cuddy and lucas’s commitment #but also… house started drinking himself into blackouts when sam and wilson got together. not when cuddy and lucas got together #which reminds me — the last time that house sought out getting trashed at the bar #was when WILSON AND AMBER GOT TOGETHER. this is a pattern for him. #he goes out and destroys himself when wilson becomes seriously romantically involved. ERGO…. this whole thing WAS abt wilson #I’ve connected the dots #house md #greg house #gregory house #hilson #james wilson #house/wilson #hatecrimes md #that ‘say it’ was literally him asking nolan to call him a f—

[bardandbear]

Look, I unapologetically love Raphael BG3 and I will forever be angry how he gets shafted for the plot (even if it is appropriately extra).

I want to ramble about why I love his ego though, because the way he acts hits different if you consider where it might come from. (Literally all the spoilers, obviously).

Raphael is just a cambion - half human, and therefore fallible, to the point that it's one of the first things your level 3 party comments on immediately after meeting him. The actual disrespect!

He's the son of Mephistopheles, who seems to be at best a very absent parent. Despite it being implied that Mephisto knows Raphael is plotting to try and take over the Hells, the most he does to stop it is sending him an incubus to distract him. None of the Archdevils show any other interest in stopping him at any point. There is a good chance that in the majority of playthroughs, the upstart heroes he's been trying to deal with will instead decide to just rob him blind instead of working with him - in no small part because they think they can.

Sure, he writes his own planar domination fanfiction, he's dramatic and ostentatious, but why? No one else takes him seriously. He's just a cambion. He's just Raphael. He has to be his own hype man because literally no one else will be. Mark my words, mans has an inferiority complex at the root of that ego. I, for one, respect the hustle.

#bg3 raphael #bg3 spoilers #bg3 meta #did I think i'd end up with kenough parallels when starting his character analysis? #no #i just have a lot of feelings about raph #he's a fascinating bastard #i both feel bad for him and think he deserves it #root cause of evil: not hugged enough as a child

[thewisestdino]

Fall From Grace 

#hollyleaf #my art #ms paint #warriors #warrior cats #biblicallyaccurate!warriors #going back to my 2014 roots with this one #but basically holly's powers never developed the same as lion and jays #she never got the 8 wings and the starclan watching over her #and she didnt feel like she had anything to contribute to the clan #+ finding out about her parents caused her to turn heel with the whole ashfur debockle #at least in this version of the AU!

[fireflowersims]

So for clarification on pink flashing stuff

I've seen a masterpost by @dystopianam about pink flashing go around, and I feel it may need some clarification.

The conclusion drawn was largely "it's thumbnails" but well... It is not. Looking at a lot of thumbnails can be a factor, sure, but it is not the root cause.

So, allow me to illustrate:

Imagine you have a bucket. That's the texture memory. How big it is depends on both the game and your pc. Fact is: you have a bucket.

Now you start putting water in: it could be a tiny amount, it could be an entire pitcher. At some point, that bucket is gonna get full and if after that you add more water, it will overflow. This is your pink flashing.

Just as how adding large amounts of water, will make your bucket flood faster, so does loading in a large amount of (big) textures increase your game's chances of flashing pink.

A smaller texture takes up less space in your bucket, a large one will take up a lot of your space. This is why texture optimization can help quite a bit with pink flashing. It has nothing to do with hardware, it's just shrinking things down so your bucket fills up slower.

So, how does this relate to thumbnails? Well, thumbnails are indeed textures. Looking at a large amount of thumbnails, does fill up your bucket. But, here's the thing: thumbnails are generated. Generating a thumbnail of something with a large texture takes the game (and your pc) more effort than generating one for a lower resolution thing. Regenerating thumbnails can indeed cause crashing. The thumbnails themselves are tiny lil images. In the end, it still comes down to texture memory and how quickly you fill it up.

All the actions listed in the original post are ones that involve loading more textures into memory.

Tldr: thumbnails are not the issue. The issue is the amount and size of textures you're loading. Your texture memory can and will eventually get full and the game is not good at dealing with it.

If you'd like to know more about pink flashing, @anachronisims has been doing a lot of research on the topic and is working on a big report. Fascinating stuff, go check it out!

#sims 2 #pink flashing #ts2 #the sims 2 #s2 #resource #I feel like reducing pink flashing down to “it's thumbnails” is skipping over the main cause which is texture size #big textures need more memory so at some point the game just cannot handle it anymore #many games have some way to clear the texture memory of unused things but the sims 2 is... not great at it #it does its best but it is not prepared for modern hardware or the sheet size of some of the textures used today #1024x1024 should be the max texture size with perhaps a handful of textures up to 2048x2048 for *very* select things #the root cause of pink flashing is still texture memory

[fromtheseventhhell]

I really hate how people act like Jon becoming King is him "usurping" his siblings when that's an unfair stigma that's followed him his entire life for being a bastard. It just blows my mind that people ignore Jon's own thoughts and wishes on the topic. Well, guess what? Robb named him as his heir, he will have a legitimate claim to Winterfell, and he will be part of discussions on who will rule. Even without that, it's very likely that some of his siblings would support him as King. I just hate how the conversation around him becoming King is framed as some big betrayal.

#jon snow #asoiaf #yeah Jon has his own guilty thoughts but!! that's cause he's a bastard and grew up hearing shit like that #literally one of cat's biggest fears is that he would /steal/ Winterfell from her children #and she's firmly against him being named heir for that exact reason...reading comprehension is on 0% #and I think there's a good chance that Arya Rickon and possibly even Bran would support him #I can see Sansa being actively against it cause she's only ever thought of him as a /lesser/ bastard + she has LF whispering in her ear #I can also see Bran having an issue though considering he's rooted in his identity as the heir to winterfell #and then there's their conflict from the og outline which could still come into play at some point #but I feel like Arya would support him and Rickon would gladly accept him as his regent #depending on how things play out but either way he isn't betraying them by becoming King #and if you think he is then congrats you're buying into the classist ideals that the books are against

[henrybelly]

honestly when i tried to figure out why some fans are so mad at ivypool these days i was looking through avos and. the scene where ivypool apologises to twigpaw for not supporting sending a patrol for skyclan is genuinely very sweet??

i actually saw someone characterize this as "ivypool forcing twigpaw to forgive her". is it crack you smoke. is that what you smoke. you smoke crack?

#she apologises THREE SEPARATE TIMES #she acknowledges that dovewing and tigerheart's situation made her ignore twigpaw's feelings #she reassures twigpaw that this is the right thing for the clans. she tells her she's proud of her & tc is lucky to have her #you guys do understand that to apologise you have to Do Something Wrong?? or is that the part that's so unforgivable? #i am fASCINATED by the treatment of dove and ivy by the fans in recent years #i'm still pondering it but i think there are a few root causes #1) I think a lot of people read oots as kids and hated dove & identified with ivy because of the underdog storyline #maybe this fandom worship of dovewing is kinda part of that? wanting to feel like you've grown out of fandom misogyny? #but i also feel like 2) tigerdove has really increased dovewing's popularity #and i think because ivypool is so staunchly opposed to their relationship people then have to villainise ivypool #3) is maybe too spicy of a take but to be honest #i think people are subconsciously way more comfortable with a woman whose story ends in heterosexual marriage and childrearing #dovewing's mom role in TBC to shadowsight probably helped her popularity #so ivypool whose relationship w Fernsong & her kits is much less of a focus. and is mUCH less maternal #and who still exhibits Ugly Female Emotions like anger and hurt #and who God Forbid now holds a position of authority... #is too complicated to fit into :) she's such a good mom :) she's such a good mate #dovewing is easier to like because she tends to be a victim of circumstances (🤫 and often lacks agency in her storylines) #since ivypool regularly uses her agency to Fuck Up #fans revert to idealising dovewing because not only is she too good to do bad things. she also doesn't do Things in general #never mind that ivypool is the one who sacrifices and apologises #anyway <3 i think if i made a full analysis of ivy and dove post OOTS i would get too many spicy anons so i will cower in the tags

[squishosaur]

hey man. i'm just saying. why would we put inexperienced teenagers with over-inflated egos and obvious emotional issues into combat classes and make them claw their way to the top of their dorms and expect things to just run smoothly. who actually thought this

#the reason rsa doesn't have overblots is because they understand the joy and whimsy of life and friendship btw #LIKE. why is there no school counselor?? do you know how much time & resources & effort & TRAUMA we could have saved the students & #school from if ANYONE had reached out to riddle and was like 'hey are you alright i heard xyz and i wanted to let you know...' ESPECIALLY #since TREY LITERALLY TELLS US 'oh well here's the lowdown on her trauma this is Probably what is causing this' #or if someone sat down to tell leona 'hey! i'm rooting for you in ur magift(?) game! you're my fav player!!' AND LET HIM FEEL NOTICED #or if someone approached azul as an Equal to try to stop his plans. as a friend even. BEYOND A BUSINESS TRANSACTION #or if ANYBODY BUT ESPECIALLY KALIM was like 'jamil i think you should follow your passions and do something you enjoy today!!' or AT LEAST #let him know he was appreciated as a person NOT JUST FOR HIS WORK #'i know you're doing a lot today but i just wanted to thank you for how much Effort you put into this and..' etc etc etc #ERM.. IF ANYONE TREATED VIL LIKE A HUMAN BEING AND NOT A CELEBRITY??? or even 'hey i loved you in this film i was wondering if we could #do a play together or something..!!' AND LET HER TRY A TYPE OF CHARACTER SHE NEVER GOT THE OPPORTUNITY TO BE. and sing her praises. #if anyone reached out to idia beyond a 'hey the teacher said to come to class'/'get out of your bed and come to our housewarden meeting' #or even. IF ORTHO HIMSELF was like. 'you know it's not your fault... you didn't cause all of this. not really' OR SOMETHING #or if malleus ever got to experience a small firsthand loss AND WAS COMFORTED THROUGH IT. not just quick fix via magic. not replacing. just #GRIEVING SOMETHING??????? and wasn't feared by literally everyone #um. maybe the real twisted part is that all of this tragedy was easily preventable if we had a support system in place. #but idk. twst is a highschool. there's no support in real high school either. i'd probably overblot too if i could ajdjrjfinfdndjd #twst #chatter #LONG RAMBLE SORRY #yes overblots are essential to the plot. but also. do you know how frustrating it is watching the blot build up and sitting in silence. #I'M SORRY IK IF SOMETHING LIKE THIS WAS HAPPENING TO A GUY I JUST MET I WOULD PROBABLY NOT NOTICE.. but of it was my Friend or Housewarden.. #I'D ASK BRO.... I'D ASK ... UGHHHHHUUUHHHH #not that anyone would notice if *I* was about to lose it tbh #speaks volumes about our society o think #OKAY NOW I'M DONE FOR REAL

[theswedishpajas]

I’ve been making some choices in-game for the sake of accuracy to me irl, but they’ve started to catch up with me mentally ✌️✌️✌️

We’re working on it though, just gotta keep at it and learn how to stop myself more in the future 😤

#my art stuff #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #astarion #tav #tiefling tav #astral-touched tadpole #special tadpole #bg3 act 3 #act 3 #act 3 spoilers #this is mainly touching on my irl self-consciousness about my veins #and I’ve had a rather troubled past causing me to become hypersexual #while also being heavily aro-ace #it’s caused a bad addiction to set roots and while I’ve been handling it okay irl lately #it’s starting to itch at the back of my head and seep into the game instead #I connect very easily with media when I hyperfixate and the world of the media feels like my own for however long I hyperfixate on it #so the things I’ve been doing in the game cus “they can’t actually harm me” there have started to harm me anyways #or at least I think so #i keep actively thinking about the choices before I make them #and my curiosity causes me to make the choices on a scrap save that I throw out after #but sometimes a lil voice in the back of my head goes “that wasn’t that bad - let’s keep it cus I WOULD do this if it were me irl” #and then I get too stubborn to change it before I’ve played enough that it would actually set me back a stressful amount to do so #I’ve been latching onto Astarion because I recognize parts of myself in him and helping myself is too hard sometimes so I help him instead #but I still deserve to help myself - especially when it’s extra hard to do so. #comic #mental health #serious conversation #a lot of my conversations are serious (even when they seem goofy on surface level) but still #sketch

[sysig]

Just a few favourites, only a couple, I swear (Patreon)

#Doodles #Wander Over Yonder #Commander Peepers #Lord Hater #Sylvia #Wander #SCII #ZEX #DAX #Emperor Awesome #Continuing to feel deeply normal about C. Peeps don't even worry about it I'm so normal about him lol #Definitely not thinking about him a lot or anything #Oh yeah and I guess there's a few others there as well lol they're also invited #The middlies of Hater and Sylvia and Wander were mostly getting back into the groove of drawing them since it's been so long #It's wild to me 'cause I know I doodled them for a good clip of time but it was before I was regularly posting so there's no evidence! #Lol - I just looked back at my original doodles and one of my notes reads ''Got 99 problems and C. Peeps is about 4 of them'' - accurate #I also recently realized that part of my love of DAX/ZEX's dynamic is probably rooted in my love of Death Glare.....parallels man every time #The subordinate/Keeper role who is solely devoted to their higher up and calls them Sir - and the one large eye! Lol #I've also found a surprising amount of like?? really gorgeous Rule 63 of a lot of the big names in the cast! I was surprised! #Lots of very cute Hater and Wander but gods Peepers is the absolutely cutest as a lady I can't get over it #Doesn't stop my rampant transmasc Peepers HC tho lol - I like him fine as cis as well here and there for flavour lol #But trans C. Peeps just feels the Most correct #I didn't see much of 63'd Awesome tho! Which I think is a shame Awesome has a very nice design #I actually really like Awesome! I think I like his fanon interpretation better but how fun his design is helps haha #A lot of things would've gone differently if there were more lady villains but I for one would've been about 50% more gay so there's that lo #Muscley shark lady 👉👈 Electric skeleton lady 👉👈 We've already got the lava lady villain! More!! Lol

[moe-broey]

@hulloitsdani I HAD TO. ROTATE THIS. IN MY MIND. SO MUCH. CAUSE HERE'S THE THING I think on the surface it COULD make sense and has SO much potential writing-wise and I have hardly thought about that before -- but!!!!

While I have been goofing on Ratatoskr and how she's just a poor little thang, upon meeting she DID tell Alfonse this:

Which gives you SO much information actually. Like. She knows a lot more than she lets on -- not because she's lying outright or even putting up a front, but because she's just. So overwhelmed and emotional and sensitive (LOUDLY so) that may be the only thing you notice, maybe even underestimating her. But I feel Alfonse took this information and did the opposite -- it's an odd position to be in, to be known presumably very well by someone who's a stranger to you. But I think he takes this in, and takes his first impression of her and her personality, motives, the conflict within her, and decides to put his faith in her.

I think ALSO he could be viewing her as a valuable ally, acknowledging:

I think, he sees she has potential, if he can win her over and have her fight on his side. I THINK. Primarily his motivation is practical. Making a quick judgement of her, coming to the conclusion she could be a valuable asset and could help the Heroes even more (going back to, him saying "She can even tell them I asked her to get us more information on the assassination plot" and "If our enemy thinks like I do... they'll see a similar opportunity in front of them.")

AUGH INTERRUPTING THAT THOUGHT THOUGH!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE!!!!!! PART OF THE GAMBIT IS "She would be a valuable ally" AND on the flipside "She could pose a considerable threat if she changed her mind and strengthened her resolve in the opposite direction (to kill me)" so winning her over is part of defusing the threat. AND it's an extra win to have all that information if she does choose the Heroes. AND it's an extra LOSS if she does leave, since she takes all that information with her AND has the advantage while the Order is left scrambling in the dark. Plus also!!!!!! Her having that intimate knowledge of his routines!!!!!! If he loses Ratatoskr, he Knows he's gonna suffer severe consequences.

ALSO. ALSO!!!!!!!! I FEEL LIKE!!!!!!!!!! That is WHY him letting her go and EMPHASIZING she can do whatever she deems necessary, EVEN giving her sisters inside knowledge on the Heroes. I FEEL LIKE. THIS IS ACTUALLY. VERY MUCH (on a much smaller scale!!!!) another Letizia moment. HEAR ME OUT

Right before The Moment, he's judging Letizia's character, what he knows to be true about her, her PERSONALITY and the way she thinks. Which leads him to go sicko mode on her (because! That Was the course of action to take with her!!!!)

THIS TIME. He's met with a very emotional, very distressed and conflicted assassin who seems to have a moral compass and is conflicted about what she's been ordered to do. In one way, she's almost like a bomb that has to be defused -- she Does pose a threat, and the threat needs to be addressed before it goes off/is out of his hands. And in this case, appealing to her emotions IS the answer!

AND. I THINK. PART of that appeal WAS to place That Much trust in her. ESPECIALLY communicating to her, she's not Required to remain loyal to the Heroes. Giving her a choice, between them and her sisters. He's heavily relying on Ratatoskr's internal conflict and also (surely it hasn't been missed on him) her attachment to him, or at very least her respect for him as a person she's come to admire. It's an extreme chance to take, but I think he knows if Ratatoskr can 1) Feel like she made the choice herself, and 2) He can catch her on another emotionally driven motivation (When she requests a favor in return, which is for the Heroes to Save her Sisters) -- I think he's fully confident he can win her over without forcing her to do anything.

WHICH. ALSO. HELPS WIN HER OVER BC her MAIN conflict she's struggling with is Being Forced To Do Something She Doesn't Want To. By NOT being forceful with her, by EMPHASIZING she can take any action she deems fit, he's set up a situation WHERE the Order of Heroes is the preferable option. He leaves her with the impression that her feelings matter, that she has agency, and ultimately it's up to her.

I FEEL LIKE........ I am talking in circles LMFAOOO BUT. I think Another thing (before thought interruption) was Alfonse's lines saying, "It's a gamble on our part, but if our enemy thinks like I do... they will see a similar opportunity in front of them." ESPECIALLY into:

WHICH stood out to me SO much because I think it really captures how practically motivated he IS here. He is using her. He's acknowledging, that if their enemy is Like Him, they're using her, too. He's creating a situation with a desired outcome, making the Order of Heroes the more desirable option to align with, giving her the feeling that she Can choose -- and, this is true! He's entirely put the choice in her hands. But in DOING that, it strengthens the possibility of her seeing the Heroes AS the desirable option. Which is the goal. Which is what he wants. He Is prepared, most likely, for the event this backfires, but also he's fully confident Ratatoskr Will choose them. (Also, as I say he was "most likely prepared for backfire"..... honestly that may not even be the case. Alfonse bluffs and bullshits his way around and out of things so much it would make Phoenix Wright blush).

WHICH ALSO LIKE..... AAAUGHGHHHH rotating him in my mind forever. You can See his traits and tendencies, see how he uses them for the benefit of his allies and those he cares about, but also SO clearly you can see. How A Lot of That is deeply rooted in his own moral compass (which is good!) and his own perspective (which is limited and sometimes flawed) and you can see. EXACTLY how these things can twist and turn and get really ugly LMFAOO

And man I haven't even gotten to Alear yet but I have THOUGHTS about his interactions w her too I need to make a separate post about LMFAOO 😅 (hit image limit and also feels like another topic entirely 🫡)

#fire emblem #feh #THIS FEELS. v rambley and all over the place but i hope it's coherent. #also like my thoughts about reginn (i don't even know if i've elaborated) and how he acted towards her #LIKE. HONESTLY. it drives me so insane like i'm imagining all of this they way he treated reginn #(which a harshness motivated by wanting to guide her to do what must be done) and how he treats veronica (friend or foe) #and how he's been handling ratatoskr. SO STRONGLY. i just feel like the root of it all is sharena. #how i think it's EXTREMELY likely he did Not escape parentfication and how he must have had to raise her #more than their actual parents did (ALL GUESSWORK cause we don't know for sure) #but i think there IS a strong sense of it was just the two of them. for a very long time. #and i think about how he's the one who taught her how to fight (alongside bruno ofc but likely before then too!!!) #I THINK ABOUT IT. ALL OF THE TIME. HOW IT SEEPS INTO SO MANY ASPECTS OF HIM. #AND THE. THE FUCMING. THE FYCKING CHANGELING -- *gets shot* #like in my head he devoted so much to her and. and. it's still so strongly present in him to this day and. and #what if i cried about it forwver. what then #fe alfonse #ratatoskr

[dykedvonte]

The Khans - My Introspective

I don't like the Military and I don't support a lot of the actions the NCR does to the Mojave in New Vegas but in terms of the Khans I feel like the fandom infantilizes or diminishes the fact that they are or at least one of the most violent raider groups in the Mojave.

What happened at Bitter Springs was a tragedy, innocent lives were lost and the fact that the NCR swept it under the rug and continued to hunt down Khans that are truly trying to back down and resettle is horrendous, but there is a history to the NCR's aggression towards them.

The Khans first appear in Fallout 1, the main faction of raiders in the game besides the mentioned Vipers (who don't actually appear if I remember correctly). They came from Vault 15 along with the members that would form rival groups; The Vipers, The Jackals, and Shady Sands. They are a very large and foreboding raiding party, known for burning towns and encampments they attack and taking survivors as their slaves or slaves to sell. They are a big reason why the Jackals and Vipers are actually so small in New Vegas, they wiped them out.

Their main targets where Shady Sands and Junker town, the former of the two would be what became The New California Republic. This explains a big part of their animosity towards the Khans, only furthered by the fact the Khans kidnapped Tandi as a young girl, the girl that would go to offically found the NCR out of Shady Sands. When the dweller saved her and killed much of the Khans, this allowed the NCR to develop into what it currently is as they no longer needed to focus on fighting off constant raids.

When the Khans became the New Khans in Fallout 2, they barely resembled the Khans as they were led by Darion, Garl Death-Hand's son (former leader of the Khans). They were smaller and refortified vault 15, still planning to take down the NCR (at this time nowhere near as imperialist as they are in FNV) as mostly a revenge/power ploy. They manipulate The Squat, a group of y'know squatters, that lived in the upper levels, promising and lying about repairing the vault and offering them ransacked caravan resources if they kept the NCR away. Being their only life line The Squat had no choice. Still the chosen one got rid of them and they left New California for the untapped Mojave.

The Great Khans, the most current iteration, continued in the path as the original Khans, regrouping and gaining information from the Followers who hoped they'd use their new medical knowledge to heal themselves. They gained more members and a substantial part of Vegas territory before they were run out by the three families. They were pushed to Bitter Springs where they first and foremost continued to pick off and attack NCR settlements, most of which consisted of caravans, towns, and camps as they saw them as easy like in their old days. It was the killing of four influential Republic members (non-military) that brought on Bitter Springs.

Bitter Springs was the result of years of hatred and animosity and likely the goal to send a final message to the Khans. It does not excuse the fact that innocent men, women, and children were slaughtered with few survivors. It does not excuse the fact that the NCR has yet to make amends for this and continues to try and persecute the Khans even in moments of surrender.

This post is not to defend what happened but to give a quick rundown of the Khan's history and their history with the NCR. It's to remind people that the NCR is not just their military power but an actual group/settlement of people that were also attacked indiscriminately by the Khans. It's to point out that the Khans were not a band of indigenous people (no matter the comparisons) driven from their homes but raiders who fed into the brutal cultures of the west coast wasteland and were in turn treated to the same things.

My frustration comes from the fact that FNV has so many comparisons to indigenous struggles but the groups it chooses are not comparable at all. Their oppression hinges on not being familiar with their past, which explains why they have the reputation they do in canon. The "tribes" are often not even groups of minorities or have goals/desires out of acquisitions of power and I feel like it is important to both acknowledge that this is bad indigenous rep because it is not supposed to be. It is supposed to be a comparison of the in-game groups and how they all do the same things and justify it in their own fucked up ways, some better at it than others.

FNV of all the Fallout games (in light of it being heavily Western based) distastefully uses indigenous imagery and theming for groups that are sad mimicries of American indigenous cultures at best and outright offensive at worst.

#this is also to say the NCR is barely different but they imply New California is a city and safe and that once the NCR military leaves #they will properly try to settle and revitalize the area unlike the goals of almost every other group #the issues arise from the tensions of the hoover dam battles the legion and the corrupt leaders chosen in what is a terse time #but the khans are interesting to me and I like the named khans we have in FNV but they are treated to be almost innocent at points due to #all the Ls they keep taking despite admitting to their raider roots and being PROUD #they partnered with the Legion and before i hear they didnt know they were slavers at a point too and likely didnt care if they believed it #would not affec their own. the Mojave is an unforgivnig place and sometimes you make unforgivable alliances since they alienated all their #other options through their continued and consistent behaviors #like i could go on how bad the native rep is but I would not use any of the tribes cause they barely count the only difference from the NCR #is they organize themself differtently like id use the tribes in Honest Hearts cause holy shit is it bad and racist like at least the Mojav #tribes are just white dickheads brutalizing each other and not the characatures of native people the Sorrows Dead Horse and White legs are #like yikes I hated playing white savior the dlc #this is also semi personal because i dont see a lot of POC people in the fandom talking about the Khans and so I dont know if the proper #perspectives can be added because just because something can represent a culture or group doesn't mean it does or that it was the primary #thing they were trying to get across #like feel free to ask and talk to me more about it cause grrr #fallout #fallout new vegas #the great khans #the khans #new california republic #the ncr #fallout 1 #fallout 2 #papa khan

[marimbles]

the agony of enjoying MULTIPLE THINGS AT ONCE. How do people do it….

#part of me is like. ok is it actually the best move to just have separate sideblogs for every interest #cause I always feel weird and insecure abt being a multifandom blog. For some reason #I’m like aaa I’ll annoy people if I post things they’re not interested in! :( they’ll be disappointed in or frustrated in me! #and then the evil (read:normal) Kermit side of me is like girl it’s not that serious #you are not important enough for ppl to be worked up about your blogging habits lmao #if they’re annoyed they unfollow. swell. neato. #u can trust people to curate their own online experience. It’s not your job to post what they want you just do what you want. on ur own blog #do u follow #Sméagol me: yes ma’am #(I mentally switched to gollum instead of Kermit btw) #gollum me: it’s normal to like more than one thing. good even. and you will go through phases anyway #that’s life silly. You’ll have different moods at different times. and maybe completely different interests in the future #are you gonna make a new blog every time you enjoy something. #your interest are fluid but your identity is rooted in something beyond them. Right #you can just be a person who’s always changing but is also essentially the same. that’s humanity hun. do you understand #Sméagol me: yes #gollum: good #Sméagol: but also what if it’s hard to be friends with someone who has 3–4 interests #gollum: good grief

[tricoufamily]

once again thinking about how easy it would be for me to be in a relationship if i was cis

#cis woman cis man either way #dude in the neighborhood has a crush on me telling me i'm beautiful like 'thanks! i will go home and cry now' #i fucking hate being trans i wish i wasn't lol #and sometimes i feel like i can't talk about this anywhere bc in a lot of trans spaces it's like. taboo? to express anything but positivity #as if me being honest about how i feel about myself is somehow how i feel about every single trans person jesus christ but whatever whateve #like listen peace and love but i need you to do me a favor and promise me you will not come at me with any 'transness should be about joy' #i know you mean well i know you're right. but transness for me /is/ pain and sorrow. that's all it's ever caused me my entire life #you have to remember that i'm from rural appalachian tennessee with a transphobic family #some of the most deeply rooted self hating repression for years just for. more honest self hatred #i've never admitted this before but i've considered detransitioning and repressing because of transphobia many times #i'm not brave i'm not strong i'm not trying to make some grand statement or be the voice of a generation. i just want to Be. you know #i just got really really unlucky #but i can't repress. i know that would be even more miserable so i'm just. trapped. forever #who i want to be forever out of reach like tantalus or something i don't know #i want to be loved #or maybe i should just watch the batman again

[ofekma]

"how can you be an animorphs fan and support Israel?"

I don't know, how CAN I be the fan of a book series talking about kids being forced to grow up too fast due to being a part of a war that has been going on for longer than they're alive, trying to defend their home against an invading force?

Seeing how this situation affects their mental state, world view and relationships with each other? Not being able to fully trust anyone else because they can turn out to secretly wish for your demise?

How can I be the fan of a series that mirrors the way I grew up, of feeling scared and lost and small but knowing that you have to keep going because there's no other way?

Knowing that the other side has people who are like you, who never really wanted to hurt anyone but are being forced to fight too, who were brainwashed from birth to not see people like you as people?

Knowing that innocents die in war, that cruel, messed up, unjust things happen in wars but not seeing another way forward?

Wanting to save your loved ones who are now being kept hostages?

YEAH I HAVE NO IDEA WHY IN THE WORLD WOULD I, AN ISRAELI PERSON, BE AN ANIMORPHS FAN?

#animorphs: there's no black and white but sometimes you have to fight to protect the people you love #people on tumblr: ISRAEL BAD PALESTINE GOOD #Hey remember how every time the animorphs kill a hork bajir controller #they kill both an innocent hork bajir hostage and a yeerk that is threatened with starvation by their superiors if they won't fight? #remember how most taxxons only agreed to collaborate with the yeerks because they feel like being puppets is better than constant hunger? #remember how Serrow only wanted to do something good but ended up causing an intergalactic war? #remember how as early as book 6 Jake didn't blink before boiling alive dozens of helpless yeerks? #remember how the Howelrs who exterminated countless species were merely toddlers playing controlled by a higher being? #REMEMBER HOW ANIMORPHS IS A FUCKING COMPLICATED BOOK SERIES AND EVEN OUR HEROES COMMITED ATROCITIES THAT HAUNTED THEM EVERY DAY? #AND HOW WE STILL ROOTED FOR THEM BECAUSE WE KNEW WHY THEY DID THIS AND WHERE THEY'RE COMING FROM? #HOW MOST OF THEIR ATROCITIES WEREN'T JUST KILLING FOR THE SAKE OF KILLING? #Unlike you know #what Hamas is doing #killing for the sake of killing #sacrificing their own people in the process #brainwashing and treathening their population #Remember how the war is actually a chess game between two larger entities that use everyone else as a peon for the war between themselves? #Hm now that surely sounds familiar #Imagine thinking that a fictional war in a book series for kids is more complicated and morally grey than one in real life #And that you can know everything about it from Twitter and tik tock #Couldn't be me lol