#san junipero au

[ghcstao3]

writing the first sentence of any fic has to be my favourite thing about writing i think

#san junipero au #writing snippet #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #ghost x soap #ghostsoap #ghoap

[artificialqueens]

🏳️‍🌈 The Miracle of Living Art by Imafuckinglibra

(Putting it after the jump because TWs)

TWs: Accidental pregnancy, grief, accidental overdose

My name’s Libra and I’m here because @artificiallita's work has emotionally affected me in the following ways…I’m starting a support group for the others hurt by her beautiful, beautiful little words.

Jk but also kind of not, Lita, you broke me. Veronica was right, this is ugh, just so amazing please never ever stop. Please take this illustration as a bribe for more even if it means waiting 5 more years, k ily bye.

Pride Challenge Points: 15,250

#rpdr art #fic inspired #inspired by the miracle of living #fic challenge #imafuckinglibra #for lita #san junipero au #black mirror au #bianca del rio #adore delano #adore & bianca #tw accidental pregnancy #tw grief #tw accidental overdose #(can I get in on that support group? -v)

[il-predestinato]

I also love AUs, but I agree - Lestappen fics where they are drivers, are always the ones that make me the most emotional.

Because it hits close to home, to reality. Because Lestappen has what other ships don't: we don't need AUs to create interesting circumstances where they would fall in love. Their real backstory is already ridiculous - born sixteen days apart, raced each other for as long as they can remember, lifelong rivals to friends, both insane about racing like no one else - their reality is already a goddamn novel in the making. It's so specific and interesting it's like it WAS written.

AUs are great, but you can often replace the characters with other fandom characters and get a similar result.

Nothing is better than taking Max and Charles' real, insane, written-in-the-stars backstory and then sprinkling a little spice and romantic plot in there.

One incredibly perfect backstory, thousands of different fic possibilities.

Amen. 🥹 The most compelling version of them will always be this version, just as they are.

Somewhere in the multiverse, Wizard!Charles is telling Jedi!Max: “In another life, I would have really liked just racing and causing inchidents with you.”

#lestappen #elle.ask #anon #although i love AUs where they are still drivers but with an extra twist as well! #like Anney’s san junipero exploration of them #or the soulmate AU where they are still f1 drivers

[innytoes]

Chapters: 2/2 Fandom: Julie and The Phantoms (TV 2020) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Rose Molina & Reggie Peters, Ray Molina/Rose Molina, Julie Molina/Reggie Peters Characters: Rose Molina, Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms), Ray Molina, Julie Molina Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Black Mirror Episode: s03e04 San Junipero, major character death as in Rose is dead but also uploaded into the cloud, so she's fine!, she's dead but she's fine!, Alternate Universe - Science Fiction, Hurt Reggie Peters (Julie and The Phantoms), Sunset Curve as Found Family (Julie and The Phantoms), an old lady knitting circle, Mistaken Identity, make Reggie a Molina Summary:

Before her death, Rose made the decision to be uploaded into San Junipero so she could still be there for her children. One day, she meets Reggie, who is there temporarily after an accident, as nanobots fix his body.

They become fast friends, and Rose is determined to make him part of the Molina family one way or another.

My last entry for @jatp-sci-fi-week! In which Rose is dead but she’s fine, Reggie wins the heart of the Old Lady Stitch-and-Bitch, Sunset Curve are menaces, Ray is amused, Julie mistakes Reggie for a catfish, and Rose gets her way sooner or later.

#jatp sci fi week #jatp sci fi week free for all #fanfic #julie and the phantoms #reggiexjulie #rose molina #ray molina #make reggie a molina 2kalways #san junipero #AUs are awesome #I wrote a thing #this was very much a 'fuck it we ball' kind of fic I wrote the first 1800 words in one go #rose and ray are a power couple even death can't stop them

[lucienne-thee-librarian]

*Jolts up and grabs you by the collar, urgency and panic in my voice as I try to tell you my vision before the morphine overtakes my system once again* BARBIE/WANDA SAN JUPERINO AU BARBIEWANDA SAN JUPERINO AU!!!!!

God. Yes

Barbie is going to a gay bar for the first time and she's feeling shy...until she meets another young woman in the gay club, a tall, pretty redhead called Wanda.

They flirt and dance and talk all night although when they're about to kiss, Wanda panics and flees. Hurt, Barbie avoids her the next time she sees her again, but Wanda finally meets her to apologize, and confess she was afraid of Barbie rejecting her if she found oht she was trans. They end up making out in a car in the most shadowy part of the back row of a deserted drive in movie theater. In the afterglow, Barbie admits she used to be married, but no longer is.

They meet a few more times but then it's Wanda's turn to pull away. Flash to the real world and we find out Barbie ended up in San Junipero after a failed suicide attempt left her paralyzed when she found out her husband Ken, was cheating on her, with her best friend who she'd had a secret crush on too, just to drive the knife in deeper. But she had survived, and when San Junipero was created she immediately wanted to escape there, so she did.

Wanda goes and visits Barbie in the care center, in person. Both of them in the real world are old, and Wanda didn't get to transition until much later. In the process she lost her wife. Later she met her husband and they lived happily together for over 20 years but he died too suddenly for his consciousness to be uploaded to the system. Hence, why Wanda has visited but never wanted to stay in San Junipero.

The doctors explain to Wanda that Barbie is starting to show signs of the early stages of dementia and they have to upload her now or risk losing her mind entirely. Barbie requested shortly before to be euthanized so she could go live in San Junipero permanently. So they do, but Wanda still hesitates on whether she wants to be put in permanently.

Then one day she doesn't show up for the meeting. Barbie waits at their favorite drive in, at the bars, but no Wanda.

In the present, the "real world", Wanda finds an old note from her long lost husband who said that he wants Wanda, but more than anything he just wants to see her happy, even if she hadn't chosen him.

And soon one day when Barbie is at the beach, she sees a familiar figure coming towards her. They begin running towards each other and hug. Wanda decided in the end to upload herself. Now she and Barbie can live in San Junipero, forever.

#barbie/wanda #barbie the sandman #wanda the sandman #sandman #im gonna drag you all into my barbiewanda agenda so help me #dunno if my thoughts are anything groundbreaking I just. Got caught up in my San Junipero feelings from years ago #and my barbiewanda feelings. Caught up in the combination pizza hut and taco bell the junipero barbiewanda au feelings-

[devilleswisteria]

i need someone to tell me there’s a san junipero byler au because jesus i just finished watching the episode and wow

#heartbroken is an understatement #future au byler and then they go back to hawkins as their dan junipero #jesus christtttttt #will as kelly and mike as yorkie #mike never having been able to get over his internalized homophobia so he and will never became a thing #in their san junipero though ! they get to revisit and live the life they should have together #i literally cried to my friend about this PLEASE I NEED THE AU #byler #will byers #mike wheeler #mike x will

[doomcheese]

Fill for the @eddiemunsonbingo - A2 : First Dance Together

Rewatching Black Mirror got me all inspired. Nothing like San Junipero to put emotions through the ringer and then prompt an ‘👀 ….au’ moment :B

#arts #steddie #eddie munson #steve harrington #eddie munson bingo

[thecreelhouse]

𝕤𝕥𝕣𝕒𝕟𝕘𝕖𝕣 𝕥𝕙𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕤 𝕞𝕒𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕣𝕝𝕚𝕤𝕥

key: on AO3 only - ➤ smut - ❤️‍🔥

𝕤𝕥𝕖𝕧𝕖 𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘𝕥𝕠𝕟

「 𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕤/𝕞𝕦𝕝𝕥𝕚𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕥 」

kill the lights masterlist — steve x violet (fem lab survivor!OC)

hard to kill masterlist ❤️‍🔥 — steve x sofia (fem assassin!OC)

feral love masterlist // you are where I belong (Halloween bonus chapter) — steve x gender neutral witch!reader

they/them/theirs || all of you — steve x non-binary!reader

sweet spot- 1, 2, 3 ❤️‍🔥 — steve x lex (camgirl!OC)

your halo’s full of fire ❤️‍🔥 - 1 & 2 - steve x afab!reader

unnamed roommate fwb trilogy lol❤️‍🔥 — it’s crazy what you’ll do for a friend / it felt like love & drugs / crystal clear — roommate!steve x roommate!fem!reader

「 𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤/𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤 」

handle with care — steve x reader

i can be your rotten fantasy ❤️‍🔥 — DBD!steve x reader x DBD!ghostface

pin back in the grenade ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

just a lover ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

bad behavior ❤️‍🔥 - steve x reader (AFAB)

sudden desire ➤ ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

need to know ➤ ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

the brat ➤ ❤️‍🔥— steve x reader (AFAB)

the bitter and the sweet ➤ ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

after hours ➤ ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

sugary sweet ➤ ❤️‍🔥 — steve x reader (AFAB)

the constellations remind me i am home - steve x reader

taking my time, let the world turn - dad!steve x reader

wild thing — steve x rosie (OC)

I wanna get better — steve x reader

so, you like movies? — steve x reader

take care of yourself — steve x reader

nowhere feels like somewhere when I’m in your arms — steve x reader

check me-owt — steve x reader

playin’ hide and seek with the light — steve x reader

smarter than you think — steve x reader

made to brave the pain — steve x reader

home for Christmas — steve x lab survivor!reader

some kind of muted blue — steve x reader (platonic)

like vines, we intertwined — steve x reader (platonic)

all I see (scares me) — steve x reader

these things take time, love, these things take backbone — steve x reader

all requests/blurbs/prompts

𝕣𝕠𝕓𝕚𝕟 𝕓𝕦𝕔𝕜𝕝𝕖𝕪

「 𝕤𝕖𝕣𝕚𝕖𝕤/𝕞𝕦𝕝𝕥𝕚𝕡𝕒𝕣𝕥 」

beautiful stranger // cosmic love // gonna keep this love (if you let me) — robin x olive (fem witch!OC)

friday, I’m in love pt.1 // 2 // 3 — robin x fem!reader || san junipero AU

「 𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕟𝕕𝕒𝕝𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤/𝕠𝕟𝕖𝕤𝕙𝕠𝕥𝕤 」

flowers in the concrete — robin x fem!reader

lonely for her — robin x jade (henderson fem!OC)

only for you — robin x fem!reader

#steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x you #Steve Harrington x oc #robin buckley x reader #robin buckley x you #robin buckley x oc #stranger things fic #house.masterlist #house.fics

[aziraphales-library]

Do you have any ineffable husbands human aus where they're angsty with a happy ending?

Here are some angst with a happy ending human aus...

Upon This Rock by Eowyn1846 (M)

Crowley and Aziraphale meet as teenagers participating in a youth curling league. Years after losing touch when Crowley's family moves away, the two former friends are reunited at a major tournament...as competitors on two very cut-throat teams, whose captains seem willing to win at any cost, even to the detriment of the sport.

What the World Gives by Adzeisval (T)

Being a teenager is hard Aziraphale Fell feels out of place among his peers and has difficulties making friends. He is terrified that if his parents realize he is gay they will kick him out. Anthony Crowley is a new student hoping to fit in and hoping his medical issues don't make themselves known. Sometimes the world can be harsh, but sometimes one lucks out and has someone by their side.

Our Lost Time by Izabella95 & UnproblematicMe (E)

Aziraphale Crowley awakes in the hospital after an almost fatal accident. But he is lucky and gets away alive and without permanent injuries. The close call sets things into perspective and he wants to fix his strained marriage. His husband, Anthony Crowley - who simply goes by "Crowley" - takes good care of Aziraphale after the accident, but there seems to be an invisible barrier between the spouses. Can Aziraphale save his relationship? What secrets does Crowley keep?

Heaven (Is a Place on Earth) by soft_october (M)

“I’m just sneaking a break from the festivities, as it were.” Crowley twists his hand in a gesture meant to sum up the circumstances which led him here. “I haven’t taken up residency in the back of a bookshop in the middle of paradise.” “Ah, well, we clearly disagree over what, precisely, paradise might mean.” Aziraphale's eyes are sharp, and through that initial mask of annoyance, a small smile is curling. Crowley came to Lower Tadfield, the UKs version of San Junipero, to have a good time, try out the software, step out of his old and failing body into the magic of a virtual world with no consequences. At least that's what he had planned, until one night he stumbles into a bookshop and meets a buttoned up, blue eyed wonder with pale curls and a perfect smile.

A streetcar named desire by elf_on_the_shelf (E)

Crowley is trying his absolute best - even if that ain't all that grand - to please Morgan & Partners in his role as Chief Architect on their new development. Too bad that this development in particular is on the very same site that the City Council wants to build a light rail network on and, even though Crowley hates everyone involved, can he hate the angelic person who is in charge of the whole project?

The Ghost of Husbands Past by A_N_D (E)

Az always knew that he’d be thrown out the moment his father found out he was gay. He hadn’t expected to be declared dead though - or for his husband to believe it! But their marriage had been a foolish teenage impulse (not to mention invalid in America), so when Az moved to a small town far upstate New York to start his new life, he moved alone. The kindest thing he could do was let Crowley mourn and move on, not be shackled for life to a now disabled partner. Tony Crowley never recovered from losing his best friend, his childhood sweetheart, his better half. He’d been drifting ever since; no plans, no hope, no money - and now, just before Thanksgiving, no job either. Given the stark choice of freezing to death or accepting his sister’s invitation to join her upstate, Tony reluctantly lives out the Hallmark cliche of Recently Unemployed Person Moves to Small Town for Christmas. It’s a time of hope, love, and family. It’s time for Az and Tony to find each other again.

- Mod D

#good omens #ineffable husbands #human au #angst #happy ending #angst with a happy ending #mod d

[ghcstao3]

ghostsoap au based on the black mirror san junipero episode???

cw: mcd but not. permanently? but also permanently? happy ending regardless

anyway soap who was sent into a coma far too early on in his military career, his parents refusing to let him go until the doctors gave them a definitive no, there’s no chance of recovery, and his conscience has lived on as a part of the simulation ever since—really, since its earliest days. and it’s… lonely.

and ghost who had gotten the chance to live out his career, and some of his life, but alone. he functioned as the days came and went but never really lived. the military was his life until it wasn’t anymore, and from then on he felt lost. until, not so long after his retirement, his body started to shut down, and he’s presented with the option of passing on into the simulation or just dying, plain and simple.

and he grapples with that decision for a while. because tommy, beth, joseph—they all died too early for this kind of opportunity. ghost would never have that possibility to reunite with them, if there even was an afterlife. but then he gets a chance at the simulation before the decision has to be made, and that’s where he meets soap. where he falls in love, and finally gets to experience the proper life he’d missed out on.

ghost tells soap about his dilemma. soap tells ghost his story in return. says he wouldn’t blame ghost for not living on in the simulation, because he himself never had a choice.

but ghost thinks on it. finally realizes that… maybe it’s in death, but isn’t this what tommy had always said he wanted ghost to have, before his own untimely death? to love someone, to live freely as himself?

so, with no one to hold him back, ghost makes the decision to have his conscience be moved to the simulation permanently, to have his physical self left behind forever, if only to be with soap for an eternity. if only to be young again in a world that didn’t want to hurt him like the real world had. a world that never would.

#sighs #adds to the pile of wips like an office worker with a stack of papers i still have yet to sort through #and there’s boxes in storage as well #simon ghost riley #john soap mactavish #soapghost #ghost x soap #ghostsoap #ghoap #alternate universe

[fellow-travelers-fic-recs]

Fellow Travelers Fic Recs | Time Travel Fics

💠 Authors: If your tumblr (or other socials) isn’t linked, and you'd like it to be, let me know and I'll be happy to add it. Or, if you are linked, and you'd rather not be, please contact me to remove it.

✨ Show the authors plenty of love with your comments and kudos on the fics you enjoyed after reading! Likes are lovely, but please reblog to share this content with your mutuals! ✨

🕰️ this is the last time i'm leaving without you by @startagainbuttercup | startagainbuttercup [7K] After saying goodbye to Tim and promising him to not write, Hawk's finds himself in the future, 70 years later. Will everything he learns in 2024 change the past? It totally will.

🕰️ is it over now? by @satelarry | satelarry [18K, WIP] Seeing the love of your life walk away without being able to tell him that you love him has to be one of the worst situations a person can go through. But Hawk decided to fulfill Tim's request, knowing it will be the last.

What happens when he wakes up, 18 years before, with the knowledge of what's going to happen if he makes the same decisions?

Does the ending always stay the same?

Or, the Time Travel AU in which the only thing ruining Hawk's plan is Tim's stubbornness.

🕰️ Again, only better by @madsmeetsmisha | madsmeetsmisha [14K, WIP] Hawk had no idea what was really going on here. All he knew was that he was back in 1954 and a completely distraught Tim was standing outside his door. And he also knew that he certainly wouldn't make the same mistake twice.

🕰️ Sands of Time (Turn Backwards) by @brouill3r | brouiller [17K, WIP] 1987 Hawkins Fuller is full of regrets for the life he's lived, though Tim once told him he regrets nothing. Hawk so wishes he could say the same.

In the still night air of a hotel room, clutching a cracked paperweight to his chest like it's carved of the finest gold, Hawk gets his wish.

Or, a time-travel fix-it fic that nobody asked for.

🕰️ Everything, Everything by tinypurpleghost💠[5K] Hawk wakes up in 1968, and everything is different.

🕰️ Perhaps, Perhaps, Perhaps It’s Real by drabbleswabbles💠[35K] And then it happened. The metallic screech of the gate, the shuffle of men stepping out beyond the prison walls. And suddenly there he was. His hair was shorter than he’d ever seen it. And his glasses were different. But it was him. Their eyes met. Tim stared at him in wide-eyed shock before recognition melted his features into a confused outrage.

Basically, a fix-it in which Hawk finds himself back in the early 70s.

🕰️ Send Back The World by Anonymous [2K, WIP] There is nothing so bitter as regret. And nothing so sweet as a second chance.

Or, Hawk gets yet another chance to fuck it up again.

🕰️ Til Time Itself Is Through by @bluebellsinburbank | ConsumingLove (Bluebellstar) [3K] Tim wakes, soft cotton under his cheek, cool silk covering his body. Bright sunlight streams through open windows, making Tim groan and bury his face in his pillow. It smells faintly like Hawk and his aftershave; heady and spicy and masculine. Tim smiles, curling his toes into the smooth silk below them.

Or, Tim Laughlin gets the life he deserves.

🕰️ this time imperfect by @startagainbuttercup | startagainbuttercup [7K, WIP] 1986. Marcus arrives at Hawk's house and gives him a box. Marcus doesn't know that paperweight in the box is a time traveling device. Will Hawk change anything? We'll see.

🕰️ I Reach for You (And You Bring Me Home) by @misstwentyynine | misstwentyynine [1K, WIP] In 1952, Hawk and Tim meet for the first time at a bar located in the enigmatic paradise of Fire Island, forging a powerful connection that continues to bring them together as their story progresses through space and time.

Or, The San Junipero AU

#ftficrecs #fellow travelers fic recs #fellow travelers fics #ftfics time travel #time travel #ftfics collections #fellow travelers #ftfics mar24

[artificialqueens]

🏳️‍🌈 The Miracle of Living Pt.2 - Lita

In this world we're just beginning To understand the miracle of living

Lmao I had you in the first half, this is not just a cutesy slice of life family AU and actually gets fucking awful and tragic from here on out, you have been warned. This was originally meant to be a single story but I decided to chunk it into two halves just so it's not unreadably long, which means ALL the suffering gets to be consigned into whatever this is. Anyway, see other part for author notes and shit, apologies in advance xo

Summary: Adore is an adult now, and life is simpler for Bianca. Until an unexpected tragedy shatters her world, and her relationship with her daughter. 

TW: Major character deaths, parental loss, accidental overdose, suicidal thoughts

[1] NEW MESSAGE Ben Putnam ✨🏳️‍🌈 12/9/46 19:08  jinkx is about to call you freaking tf out - don’t listen to them, im basically fine. got into an accident driving home, i look kinda banged up and i think my shoulders dislocated but nothing serious. pls call adore and tell her - if she says shes gonna ditch her concert or anything like that dont let her, she doesnt need to worry. if ur not busy and feel like coming to see me id like that (and i think jinkx could use some moral support lol, theyre taking this harder than i am) but don’t let j convince u that im on my deathbed. love ya, bitch! b xoxo

*****

November 12th, 2046

“Bea…”

Jinkx stands up as Bianca enters the waiting room. Their voice is cloying - too sickly. Too sympathetic.  

Of all of Ben’s various partners since the divorce, Jinkx was definitely Bianca’s favorite. Bianca had been Ben’s maid of honor (or ‘cunt of dishonor’ as he’d affectionately christened her) at their wedding last spring. Jinkx is kind, sensitive - their eccentricities line up perfectly with Ben’s, they’re a good step-parent to Adore, as resistant as she’d been to having a step-parent. However, Jinkx under pressure is prone to amateur dramatics - Ben’s text prediction regarding the nature of their impending phone call had been totally spot-on. 

So Bianca is surprised to see that they look drained - not sad. Not scared. Just tired - their shock of red hair disheveled, eyes puffy and face moist with half-dried tears. Bianca grips the strap of her purse a little tighter. She hadn’t expected this. They had been all catastrophe and hysterics on the phone - sobbing like their life depended on it. Why are they so calm? 

Per Ben’s instructions, Bianca hadn’t dropped everything to go to him. She’d been working late, supervising a bunch of bored, annoyed teenagers doing stocktake - she hadn’t exactly bided her time, heading straight for the hospital as soon as she’d clocked out, but she also hadn’t exactly rushed. 

Two lanes of the freeway were closed because of a car wreck. She figured it wouldn’t be the same one - it couldn’t have been that bad if Ben was awake, coherent, and texting her. As the backed-up traffic crawled past the remains of the scene at five miles an hour, she’d tried not to look. She knew she shouldn’t have looked. But she looked anyway - she’d caught sight of the remnants of Ben’s car at the front of a pile-up, crushed from behind by a smoldering pickup truck, and felt the sting of vomit rising up at the back of her throat. The driver’s side door looked intact. That was something. Ben was fine. Ben had told her himself that he was fine. So Ben was fucking fine. 

On the drive to the ER, Bianca called Adore - anxiety twisting below her ribcage, visions of shattering glass and crumpling metal scorching into her eyelids every time she blinked, desperate for a distraction. The phone had been picked up by her weirdo manager, Winona or Wilma or whatever her name was, who’d decided that a call from her mom, regardless of the matter at hand, wasn’t important enough to bother Adore with before a gig, and had hung up. 

And now she’s been taken into a side room that feels like a fucking morgue, and Jinkx is acting so calm and kind that it’s nauseating. This feels weird. There’s a bible on the table in the middle of the room. What the fuck is happening? 

Jinkx reaches out, and pulls Bianca into an oppressively tight hug. Bianca squirms, determined to extricate herself from the stifling embrace and start asking questions. She’s never known Jinkx to act anything but weird, but this was bizarre even by their standards. When they break away, Jinkx takes Bianca’s hand. It sets her teeth on edge. 

“Jinkx, what’s going on?” Bianca’s voice comes out sterner than she would have liked. 

“Did you call Adore?”

What kind of fucking response is that?

“I tried. Her manager picked up - she’s at a gig, I’ll talk to her tomorrow.” 

“I really think you should try and talk to her now.” 

Bianca really doesn’t like Jinkx’s tone. She also doesn’t know what to do with herself. She figured she was here as emotional support for Jinkx, who seems fine if a bit off-kilter and cryptic - or as a proxy for Adore, who was performing and/or wasted in Austin, enjoying the sudden and somewhat random success of her previously struggling music career. 

“Jinkx, where’s Ben? What happened?”

Jinkx grimaces. They try to convince her to sit down - urging her towards a ugly upholstered chair with their lips pursed. Bianca doesn’t move. 

“Jinkx.” Bianca repeats herself more insistently, folding her arms. Jinkx sits down, clenching their jaw and breathing shakily. “Where the fuck is Ben? I need to see him." 

“…he died, Bea.”

Bianca’s blood turns to ice in her veins. She takes a sharp breath in. 

“What do you mean he died?” Bianca’s voice is thin. Jinkx doesn’t say anything. “He texted me - he was fine like, an hour ago.” Jinkx stays silent. Bianca feels like she’s going to throw up. Why won’t they say anything?  “He’s- Jinkx, what do you mean he fucking died?”

“They thought he was fine,” Jinkx sniffs. “There were other people from the wreck who were hurt worse than he was - he kept saying he was okay so the doctors would focus on them, and then he coded out of nowhere. I think they said he was bleeding in his abdomen or something - nobody realized until it was too late. He was sitting up and talking to me, then he…” Jinkx stops, swallowing hard. Their eyes have welled up. 

“Why didn’t you call me? I would have tried to get here faster.” Bianca’s knees are shaking. She can’t move - can’t admit to the failure of her emotions. Frightening and all-consuming as they are. She’s still wearing her work lanyard, and it feels utterly stupid. Why hadn’t she just fucking left? Why had locking up a goddamn store she could burn to the ground without losing sleep been more important than this? Than Ben? 

“I didn’t know how to.” Jinkx won't make eye contact with her. “I couldn’t tell you over the phone - it didn’t feel right.” 

Bianca sits down before she collapses. Her hands are shaking. Her throat hurts like she needs to cry, but there are no tears. She isn’t crying, and she won’t - not until it’s essential. 

“But you were- you shouldn’t have waited all this time on your own. I would have been here sooner.” Bianca is barely able to talk. “I’m sorry.”

She doesn’t even know what she’s talking for - trying to fill the awful, empty air with some sort of noise, even if it is wilted platitudes. She’s horribly aware of her own breathing; how hard it is, how much effort it’s taking, how it feels like she’s choking. It’s like she’s drowning in the air and the silence - like a goldfish dropped out of the bowl. 

Jinkx puts an arm around her shoulders. There are tears rolling down their cheeks. 

“I really think you should call Adore again.” 

Adore. Adore didn’t get to say goodbye - Adore didn’t fucking know. That was her fucking dad, and she loved him, and she’d never-

Bianca stops. Something in her brain ticks. A somber conversation at the kitchen table. 

“His, uh- his advanced directive. San Juni-whatever -  Cookie heaven-“ Bianca blurts out, ejecting the words as soon as they appear in her head. The comfort feels cold, but it’s comfort nevertheless. 

She looks at Jinkx. Their face has crumpled. They’re shaking their head. No. 

“They tried - it all happened too quickly, it didn’t work. He was gone before they could…” Jinkx bites their lip. “I’m sorry - I know how much it means- meant to him, I know he wanted…”  

Bianca shakes her head, trying to get Jinkx to stop talking. It isn’t fair - they’ve just lost their husband, and yet it’s them trying to comfort her?  

“It’s okay.” 

It’s not. But Jinkx rests their head on Bianca’s shoulder anyway, and Bianca takes their hand, even though she feels like she’s only making everything worse. What warmth is she capable of? Her presence isn’t doing anything besides forcing Jinkx to stir up their own raw emotions, and reminding them both of the cavernous space between them that Ben’s daughter should be filling. 

Bianca fumbles her phone out of her purse with her shaking hands as Jinkx cries a wet patch into her collar. She needs to call Adore.  

*****

November 24th, 2046

The silence in the kitchen is uncomfortable. Neither Adore nor Bianca knows how to fill it. Ben’s funeral was yesterday morning. Bianca doesn’t know if Adore is okay, but she doesn’t know what to say to her either. She hasn’t seen her cry yet. 

She’s exhausted. The last couple of weeks have been a terrible, sleepless headfuck. All of the funeral planning and formality had fallen into Bianca’s lap - Jinkx had been too distraught to try and think about it, and she couldn’t ask Adore. It was the only real help she’d been able to offer; if there’s one thing that Bianca knows for a fucking fact, it’s that she’s awful at providing comfort. But as usual, she’d taken too much on, and she hadn’t had time to process what had happened - time to grieve, or even just to fucking take a breath and figure out where her own head was at. 

Bianca feels hollow. And Adore won’t speak to her. She’s sitting at the dinner table, with her bright blue hair piled on top of her head in a sloppy ponytail, wearing some tattered band shirt that doesn’t really fit her, and she seems…fine. She’s been home since Ben died, but they’ve been floating around the empty house on two completely different planets; barely making eye contact with each other, let alone talking. There’s a mug of coffee turning cold in Bianca’s hand, and her daughter won’t meet her gaze. 

Adore fidgets with the hair-tie around her wrist. She looks nervous. 

“Listen, Mom-”

“Are you okay?” Bianca blurts out, and then cringes - Adore looks at her with frustration in her glazed-over eyes. 

“I need to tell you something.”

“What’s up?” Bianca tries to inject some warmth into her voice. 

“I know I said I’d stay for a little longer, but I’m…”

Oh god. Bianca already doesn’t like where this is going. She clenches her teeth, trying to contain the stupid, defeated little whimper she can feel rising into the back of her throat.

“I got a call from my manager this morning. My new single drops in a week, and there’s- this big-deal band wants me to open for them on their tour. It’s two months on the road, and I know that I shouldn’t- I mean, it’s a huge opportunity, and the money is really fucking good, and I’m…” Adore’s words are stilted and awkward. 

Bianca takes a second to compose herself. 

“When would you be leaving?” Bianca eventually says. It’s the most neutral question she can think of, and her words come out flat and unbothered. She can’t say what she really wants to - can’t beg her to stay, can’t argue back. Can’t take this from her. 

“Day after tomorrow,” Adore says to the floor, still wringing her hands awkwardly. 

“And why do you sound like you’re asking for permission to go?" 

“Because- I don’t know.” Adore says, equally lacking in emotion. It’s felt for the last couple of weeks like she and Bianca have just been going through the motions of their relationship without any feeling. “I mean- fuck, you’re my mom. And everything is just- I can’t leave you right now. If you said no, then I can’t...” 

“Why do I have to say no?” Bianca tilts her head. Her neck is stiff from the sleepless nights. 

“Because I don’t want to.”

That answer frustrates Bianca, and she can tell from Adore’s body language that she knows it. Adore picks at a loose thread on her shirt - she’s never been able to sit still. Bianca pinches the bridge of her nose.

“I’m not gonna be the bad guy, Dorey - even if you want me to. We’re talking about your career here - not doing it would be fucking stupid,” Bianca says, toneless and insincere again. She pauses. “Do they know that your dad just died?” 

“…No,” Adore grimaces. The first small twinge of emotion flashes across her face for a second, and then it’s gone. “They might give it to someone else. They’ll think I’m gonna be unstable or unreliable or something.”  

“Are you?”

“Maybe,” Adore purses her lips. “It’s kinda still not real. Maybe it’ll stay like that if I’m distracted.”

“And maybe it’ll get real when you’re on the road - you need to think about yourself.”

Adore murmurs something unintelligible by way of response, shakily trying to affirm that she can do it. Bianca stares into her coffee cup. They seem to have reached some level of nonverbal understanding that they’re not gonna talk about this any more. Adore is leaving tomorrow, and Bianca better make peace with that. 

“You’re not mad about me leaving you by yourself, are you?” Adore’s meek voice cuts through the icy reticence. 

“What? No - I’m a big girl, I’ll survive,” Bianca shrugs her shoulders. Why does Adore default to the assumption that she’s always mad? Why does she have to be the villain all the goddamn time? Can’t she just be upset? 

“But like…do you have friends?" 

“Yes, I have fucking friends, Adore.”

And then she thinks about it. Her family doesn’t give a shit, and Raja had broken things off with her a couple of weeks before Ben dropped dead out of fucking nowhere - and yeah, maybe she’s close enough with a couple of people from work that she’d be able to talk to them, but the thought makes her squirm.

She’d not so much asked Adore to stick around for a couple of weeks after the funeral as she had begged her to. The loneliness is choking her, and her daughter is the only person she can face - because they never really talked about their feelings, and even this wasn’t enough to make them start. She just needed someone to be quietly sad alongside. The more that she thinks about it, the more she realizes that the only person she wants to talk to about the pain inflicted by Ben’s death is Ben himself. 

Which she should be able to do. She’s grown more attached to the San Junipero concept than she ever wanted to be. Somewhere, in the back of her mind, she’d gotten comfortable with the two of them never having to live without each other. Except that didn't work, and now he’s gone. Forever. 

Bianca had friends. A friend. She’d never needed anyone else, and so she’d never bothered trying to find them. She hadn’t planned for an eventuality in which he’d be dead by forty-six. 

Bianca is crying. Horrible, huge, ugly floods of tears. Adore looks nervous - like she doesn’t know what to do with herself. This isn’t fair. She can’t make Adore deal with her like this. But she can’t stop. Twelve days of awful emotional blockage are clearing themselves all at once, and Bianca’s face is soaking wet and there’s snot running down her chin, and she feels about as disgusting as she probably looks. Adore’s chair scrapes the tiled floor, and she’s standing behind Bianca - wrapping her arms around her, resting her sharp chin on Bianca’s shoulder. 

Adore’s body is starting to heave against hers, and as Bianca tries to blink through some of the blur to her vision and catch her trembling breath, she realizes Adore is crying too. Is this progress? 

“You don’t have to go if you don’t want to, baby.” Bianca takes one of Adore’s hands in hers, running a thumb across her tattooed knuckles. “It’s okay - it’s okay to be sad.”

“I’m not sad.” Adore’s voice is thin. “And I have to go. I don’t want to be here. I can’t be here without him.”

Adore mutters the admission like it’s blasphemy, and Bianca doesn’t like it, but she knows. Ben’s ghost lingers in every brick and board and fiber of this house. It hurts - that she isn’t capable of being what Adore needs right now. But she understands. 

*****

June 7th, 2047

“Don’t fucking put that on me - don’t screw up my childhood and then keep making me miserable as a fucking adult, it’s not fair-" 

“Ob, cry me a fucking river - you had a great childhood!”

“Did I? Getting dragged up by some fucking idiot who didn’t know what she was doing-" 

“I was a fucking kid, Adore - I was trying my fucking best-” 

It’s dark outside. Bianca feels like shit. She wishes Adore hadn’t left. 

She hasn’t been able to sleep without sedatives since Ben died, and she hates it. She also doesn’t know why - she wasn’t there. It didn’t happen to her. It’s not her tragedy. She fishes the blister pack of xanax out of her purse and swallows one with the tail end of her glass of wine. Sleep. She needs sleep. She needs this shitty, awful, horrible day to be over. Maybe when she wakes up, Adore will be over her tantrum. 

She drops the pills on the kitchen counter. The last dregs of the wine are eyeing her up through the bottle. Bianca hesitates for a moment, refills her glass, and swiftly empties it down her throat. 

She walks through the empty living room, put off by the silence. It’s too quiet in this house. She wishes she hadn’t kept it. Ben deserved it more - he had a partner, and a good life, and hope for the future. Not the pathetic remains of half a dozen short-lived, shitty relationships, and a dead-end job. Adore loved him - she clearly can’t fucking stand Bianca. There would still be life in these walls if he’d taken it, and Bianca had hiked all her stupid clothes and coffee table books and vanity and venom to a crappy bachelor apartment.

It was Ben’s fucking house - it was his career that had paid for it. Bianca felt sick enough with guilt and frustration that he’d insisted she stayed and he left, and then kept ‘forgetting’ to cancel the mortgage auto-payments when he was still alive - just like he kept ‘forgetting’ to stop making her car payments, or kept sending her cheques from some ‘investment account’ they’d apparently set up years ago that she had no memory of. She’d stolen a better quality of life than she was owed from a guy that she was tethered to based on one night of bad decisions when they were in their twenties. It would have been easier on her conscience if Ben had resented her for it. But he didn’t. He’d looked out for her and loved her right up until the ugly end and she didn’t deserve any of it. 

If Ben had stayed here, he would have had to drive a different route to work. That’s why they bought the house - it was close to his job. Maybe he’d still be alive. Maybe it would have been her that died after a rush hour car wreck, of an internal hemorrhage that every medical professional in the vicinity was too busy and too stupid to notice. Maybe things would be better that way. 

The house is too quiet, and there’s too much space - Bianca traipses up the stairs, her fingers brushing over the lingering texture of Adore’s childhood crayon-on-wall scribbles, long since painted over. 

The wine is making her feel worse. She’s angry - hurt, frustrated, upset. But not with Adore. With herself for making her this way. 

Ben was warm, Ben was supportive. Ben could never see a single fault in her - not like Bianca. Bianca was the Bad Cop; the enforcer, the prison warden. Bianca nagged Adore about her homework and her curfew and her room being a mess - Bianca questioned her judgment, Bianca shat on her fashion choices. Bianca tried her best to make sure the kid didn’t turn out like she had. And she’d done it - Adore was successful, she was living a life she could look back on and be proud of. So, no fucking wonder Adore’s ideal future was one that didn’t have Bianca in it.  

“Bull-fucking-shit. You weren’t a kid, you were in your twenties-“ 

“I was two years younger than you are, you think you’d be great at raising a child now? Forget about finding out you’re pregnant when you were twenty-one and having to give up everything you’ve ever wanted in life for-“

“Nobody asked you to do that.”  

“No, they didn’t - but I had to do what was fucking best for you. Fuck my dreams, fuck what I wanted. You think anybody is working in a goddamn Urban Outfitters age forty-fucking-seven because they want to be?”

“I’ve been out of your house for five years, you’ve had time. Go live your dreams, since I’m not a fucking burden on you any more-“

“You’re not fucking getting it - the ‘living my dreams’ ship has sailed, since I had to drop out of fucking college for you. I had to put my life on hold indefinitely for you, and so did your father, so stop being such an ungrateful little shit-“

Bianca keeps replaying the fight in her head. Tonight had started well. Adore was back in town between tour dates and album sessions - not for Bianca. To see friends, and to meet with some record execs that Bianca was too uncool to know the names of. But when Bianca had asked if she had a free night, Adore had humored her. They’d ordered pizza, bought a couple bottles of wine, and for a moment, things felt the way they used to. Bianca was happy, for a fleeting second. 

Adore had been her best friend until she was thirteen. Then some awful melting pot of Adore’s pubescent bitch tendencies and Bianca’s stubbornness and short fuse had kicked off a bizarre ongoing war between the two of them that only seemed to mellow out once Adore left home and they weren’t constantly in each other’s way. It was normal teenager shit - Bianca remembered things being the same way between herself and her mother when she was in junior high. Her mother that she doesn’t fucking speak to any more. 

Bianca loves Adore so much that it’s physically painful, and she felt like a monster the entire time they were at odds. But she didn’t know how to stop it - she didn’t know how to be whatever Adore seemed to need from her. 

Not that there hadn’t been good moments. Adore’s first concert. The family vacation to Cancun. The weekend shopping sprees. Every so often, Bianca caught a glimpse of the fully-formed human being that Adore was starting to become, and she…well, adored her. But sooner or later, the shit would start again; Bianca could feel herself failing her daughter in real time. 

Just like when Adore was a teenager, things had fallen apart tonight just as Bianca was starting to enjoy the good.  

It was her fault. Like usual. Bianca had too much to drink too quickly, and she got emotional. She’d phrased some stuff poorly. She’d upset Adore. It was always her fault - it was always her that made the first wrong step. Adore just reacted to her shitty parenting.  

She’d made an off-handed comment about Adore ‘abandoning’ her. Which, in her crappier moments, she often felt but resolved never to say to her. Adore was an adult with her own life and her own burgeoning fame to deal with, and she’d lost her dad less than a year ago. Bianca’s feelings didn’t matter; she should be seeking her emotional support from someone her own age. So fucking what if Adore had better things to deal with than her mom’s grief and loneliness? 

But she’d said it anyway, and then she’d doubled down. Just like she always did. Adore started crying. Bianca got frustrated. God, she misses Ben. He wouldn’t have let this happen. 

“Leave Daddy the fuck out of this, he’s the only person I never doubted cared about me and I-" 

“Yeah, he did. He really, really fucking cared about you - enough to spend nearly his entire adult life closeted because he wanted to give you some semblance of a normal childhood, enough that the night he fucking died he didn’t want me to call you because he didn’t want to worry you-“

“That’s not a good thing! I wish I’d been there! I wish I knew, instead of coming offstage to find out that my dad had fucking died and my stupid, selfish, uptight bitch of a mother didn’t think it was worth her time to tell me that he was in that accident-“ 

“I told Willam - she said it wasn’t important enough to get you on the goddamn phone! Blame her!”

“You should have tried harder!”

“I didn’t think I had to. Your dad didn’t know how bad it was, he didn’t know what was going to happen - none of us knew, obviously if we did I would have put you on a flight as soon as I-“

Bianca has been trying to write that stupid fucking San Junipero bullshit out of her will for months now. If Ben wanted it and didn’t get it, she’s sure as shit not doing it now. However, the process is a fucking nightmare - eight hundred stupid phone calls to eight hundred useless morons who need to refer her to the next person, to try and sell her on an upgrade or ask her if this is because she wants the payout for the unused credit on her plan. It’s demoralizing and exhausting - the evil spiritual stepsister of canceling fucking cable, but a hundred times harder and with constant reminders of her fucking dead ex-husband and the last request he never got. 

Everything is depressing and shit, and she’s tired. She wants it to end - she wants to return to a normal that she can never get back. 

Bianca lingers at the open door of Adore’s teenage bedroom. It’s a shitshow. She hadn’t tidied up after herself when she left after Ben’s funeral - if anything she’d made more mess, rummaging around in her things and packing and unpacking for that fucking tour she had to go on. Which had done good things for her. In the last six months, her opening spots had turned into festival headliners and talk show appearances; she had an album in the works, and was watching her teenage dream blossom in real time to heights she’d never imagined it would reach. Bianca is glad that she went. Even if she hates her for it a little bit.

Bianca doesn’t want to touch anything. She treads carefully across the messy floor, trying not to disrupt anything; trying to preserve her daughter’s chaos, learn to live in it and love it as she did. Adore’s bed is unmade. The sheets smell like her. 

There’s a framed picture by her bed - a print of a blurry selfie taken at Ben’s niece’s bat mitzvah. She remembers that night. Adore had just turned twenty-one and her hair was purple. They’d gotten irresponsibly drunk on kosher wine, and Adore had climbed into Bianca’s lap to take the picture, pressing her gloss-sticky lips to Bianca’s cheek and telling her she loved her. They’re both smiling like maniacs. 

Adore had just turned twenty-one. That picture hadn’t been there when Adore last occupied that room - she’d moved into her college dorm a few days before her nineteenth birthday. She’d brought that here. And left it here. Bianca feels queasy. She picks it up gently, like it’s a precious artifact. The frame is bright red hard plastic, shaped like a heart - painted on one side, in Adore’s endearingly shitty handwriting: LOVE YOU MOMMY XO

Bianca’s eyes well up. It was a fucking gift that Adore never gave to her. Probably because she’d ruined Adore’s last visit home. Just like she ruined tonight. Just like she ruined her. Bianca drops the frame like it burns to touch, and she hears the glass shatter against the hardwood floor.  

She closes the door as she leaves, hearing it slam and her own breath becoming frantic. She feels that familiar ache, a sob building up in the depths of her chest.  

She’s pressed against Adore’s wall and staring directly into Ben’s old room. She’d transformed it into a pitiful sewing workspace that she’d barely used when he moved out - a weird attempt to kick some sense of purpose back into her life when Adore had flown the nest and Ben was out living his own life, picking up an old hobby that had dominated her teens and fuelled her plans for the future. Plans that had died a death in the bathroom of her old apartment downtown. The mannequin torso sits gathering dust, half-finished sketches litter the table. A waste - like everything else. 

She can’t do this. She doesn’t want to be here. She wants Adore back. Wants to hold her in her arms, breathe in her scent and her warmth, and tell her she forgives her for every horrible thing that had come out of her mouth tonight. 

No, she wants to tell her that she’s sorry. For everything. 

Sleep. She needs to sleep. 

“You just don’t want to admit that you screwed me out of a chance to say goodbye! You feel like I’ve abandoned you? Fuck you! You didn’t love him!” 

“I did-" 

“He was your friend - he was my fucking dad. Don’t try and pretend that what you’re feeling right now is anything like what I’m feeling, because it’s not.”

“It doesn’t have to be - Dorey, we can deal with this together. I want to be there for you. I want to help you. And I miss you, is that such a fucking crime?”

“You miss being a bitch to me - you miss telling me that I’ve wasted my life. You miss having someone else to boss around, because that’s all you wanna do.”

“Adore, I tried my fucking best for you. I didn’t have it in me to be a perfect mother - I didn’t have one, I wasn’t set up to be good at this. I tried my best, and if you feel like I’ve failed then I’m really fucking sorry. But I love you, and-“

Why the fuck are her pills on the kitchen counter? Bianca pops one out and swallows it dry, desperate for her mind to shut the fuck up. She’s drunk and confused and alone and fucking sad, and she wants to sleep.

Should she call Adore? No, that feels desperate. She needs to leave her alone; let her get over this at her own pace, let her come back on her own. If she wants to come back. She’ll come back. 

Bianca didn’t come back. Bianca didn’t forgive her mom for the sin of setting her expectations too high, so why the hell would Adore do the same? Maybe her mom feels the same way about her - maybe she feels deprived of a presence in the life she created, and maybe she loses sleep and paces around the house at night like a madwoman and cries over her too. That feels vindicating - so why does it hurt so much that Adore is probably gonna commit her to the same fate? 

Bianca collapses into the couch. Her body feels heavy. The clock on the wall says it’s just after midnight. There’s an empty pizza box on the coffee table. Adore’s lipstick is stained onto the rim of her glass. 

“God, can you not go five minutes without trying to make me feel like shit? I know. I know you tried, I’m sorry I didn’t turn out the way you wanted me to-“

“Do you think this is what your dad would have fucking wanted?”

“Don’t talk about what he would have wanted - what he would have wanted doesn’t matter. He’s dead, mom. He’s fucking gone. He’s gone, and I’m never gonna get him back, and now I’m stuck with you.”  

“The fuck do you mean ‘stuck with’ me?”

“You know exactly what I fucking mean.”

“What, you wish it was me? You wish I was the one that had fucking died? If that’s what you mean, say it.” 

“If I have to choose one of you then yeah. Yeah, I wish it was him that was still here.”

The couch is soft and warm and Bianca is falling asleep. She’s comfortable - but she feels wrong. Her head is swimming. 

It’s getting dark outside. Bianca watches for headlights in the driveway. Maybe Adore will come home and forgive her. Bianca is tired, and her head is heavy, and she wants to go to sleep. Sleep and forget. Maybe Adore will love her again when she wakes up. 

*****

[1] MISSED CALL  Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 00:21

[3] NEW MESSAGES  Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 00:23 mom im rlly sorry. i love you. can we talk <33 mom are you okay? talk to me 

[3] MISSED CALLS Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 00:29

[4] NEW MESSAGES Adore DR  00:34 mom PLEASE answer ur phone  im sorry  talk to me please im coming over

[5] MISSED CALLS Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 00:58

[3] NEW MESSAGES Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 01:01 im outside answer the door  mommy i know ur mad at me but i want to talk to u, im rlly sorry i love u so much pls answer the door mom MOM

[8] MISSED CALLS Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 01:07

[2] NEW MESSAGES Adore DR 💕😻👩‍👧 01:11 mommy please  im sorry. i love you. 

****

Pride Challenge Points: 6662

#rpdr fanfiction #the miracle of living #lita #bianca del rio #adore delano #adore & bianca #mother/daughter au #bendelacreme #jinkx monsoon #san junipero au #black mirror au #fic challenge #dystopia #angst #tissue warning #parenting au #dead dove do not eat #tw major character deaths #tw grieving and depression #tw parental loss #tw suicidal thoughts #tw accidental overdose

[chewydolls]

Hear me out

Hideduo San Junipero AU

Pac is the sole survivor of a failed prison escape, testing out a new experimental technology: a simulated reality that transports your conscience to a digitalized paradise, where you can live in the body and period you choose, even after your passing

Fit is a veteran on his death bed presented with the possibility of navigating his sexuality for the first time in his life in this simulation of an island

They become friends. Roommates. Something more

But while Pac has doubts about residing permanently in this immaterial world, fearing he will never see his friends again in the afterlife, Fit knows this is the only paradise waiting for him after his death

#qsmp au #hideduo #fitpac

[il-predestinato]

hello beautiful elle

since it is going to be a long 3 months without our boys could you please recommend some fics that you liked? cause i really like your writings and how realistic they are and i wanted to get some of you suggestions for the break!

love you loads

Thank you, lovely anon, for your very kind message! 🥺 I must admit I have fallen behind in reading fics. I am sure I am forgetting some excellent Lestappen fics/writers, but these are some of my all-time favourites!

Lestappen Fic Recs:

And in the end I will seek you out amongst the stars by mandzilkos (@geeeooorrrge) - rating: G, 22k words

Soulmate AU where you see in black and white until you meet your soulmate, and the world goes back to black and white after your soulmate dies. This is ALWAYS the first Lestappen fic that comes to mind whenever anyone asks for a recommendation, and it is probably my all-time favourite. The fic that inspired me to write Lestappen, if I'm honest.

getting half of you just ain't enough by shybear_styles - rating: E, 20k words

The friends with benefits story that spans the 2019 season. The only thing better than amazing smut is amazing smut with feels. For sure a top 5 fic in the Lestappen fandom for me. Also, this author is simply amazing in general and you should read all of her fics! I haven't given up hope that she will return one day and write more Lestappen. 🤧

you feel the mornin' feel by shybear_styles - rating: M, 3.3k words

Remember that time Sebastian Vettel asked Charles, "Is he [Max] pretty?" And we never got an answer because Charles descended into gay panic? Well, worry not! We get an answer in this fic.

Monaco Malaise by ProngsfootxJily (@cupidskissx) - rating: E, 8k words

Rivals with benefits, takes place after the 2021 Monaco Grand Prix. Yes, this one is delicious smut but also a character study. Both of them are written so well, and it leaves you begging for more. Don't forget to check out the equally amazing sequel! (Don't worry, I have been relentlessly harassing her to write the sequel's sequel.)

algorithm by Anney (@badboy-george) - rating: M, 17k words

In a world where F1 uses simulation-based compatibility tests, five times Max doesn't find the right partner and the one time he does. Black Mirror ("San Junipero" and "Hang the DJ") vibes in the best way. Another one of my absolute favourite fics. If you've read any Lestappen fics, you've probably read "Every Other Sunday." This one is simply a masterpiece by the immensely talented Anney; definitely check out her other fics!

panem et circenses by Anney - rating: E, 13.2k words

Wow - simply devastating, haunting, an ode to these two as drivers, set in a dystopian future AU. The world building is absolutely incredible, but at its heart is such a beautiful story of love and hope. This one doesn't get enough recognition. (TW: implied non-con, not between Lestappen.)

Unlearn by wantinghopingwriting (Tazza1993) (@lightsoutfullhearts) - NR, 45k words

This is another all-time favourite, a must-read. Fake/pretend relationship to lovers multi-chapter story that is ever so satisfying; both of them are so well characterized. Set in a parallel-ish 2022 season. I really cannot recommend this one enough.

the edge of what can be loved by Ledger_m (@the-last-jedis) - rating: T, 13k words

The third wheel fic from the perspective of Max and Charles' various "Steves." It's funny, heartwarming, and everyone on the grid is nosy as fuck.

Charles Leclerc vs Red Bull caps by Ledger_m - rating: T, 6.4k words

Charles is the hero we all need, as he goes on a mission to get rid of all of Max's stupid Red Bull caps. This is REQUIRED reading! Kami is a genius. Go read all of her fics.

If You Don't Play, You'll Never Win by antimonyandthyme (@antimonyandthyme) - rating: T, 4.1k

Post 2021 Monaco Grand Prix. Max wants to take their relationship further; Charles... doesn't. Oh my God, where do I begin to describe how much I love this fic. The language is beautiful, both of them are so well-written, and I feel punched in the gut over and over again in the best way. The ending (well, the whole thing) is so damn satisfying.

all's well that ends well (to end up with you) by stylestappen (@stylestappen) - rating: G, 3k words

Max has a meltdown in the cereal aisle (yes, the cereal aisle) at 3 am when he realizes he is in love with Charles despite the latter's questionable taste in cereal. Dani has an absolutely wicked sense of humour! (Although I don't understand what she has against cocoa puffs 😭.) She also wrote a banger of a Lestappen soon-to-be teammates fic, so make sure to check out her profile.

Max Verstappen: Spotify Extraordinaire by frnndtorres - rating: G, 26k words

Max makes Spotify playlists for the grid. Fluffy, funny, care-free, liberal use of nicknames, with a healthy dose of feels between Max and Charles. A really fun read.

i love the way your green eyes mix with that malibu indigo by altissimozucca (@altisssimozucca) - rating: G, 11k words

Max and Charles spend summer of 2020 together in Malibu and try not to fall in love. Spoiler alert: they fall in love. I feel the urge to explain something: When I first started reading Lestappen, there were less than 250 fics in their entire tag (yeah I know, we are currently close to 3000 fics, which is insane). From 2019-2021, we truly lived off crumbs. So trust me when I say that we owe so much to altissimozucca, who wrote something like 40% of the fics in the Lestappen tag and nearly single-handedly kept us fed in those days. It's so hard to pick one of her fics to recommend, so make sure you check out her profile for more!

#803442 by altissimozucca - rating: M, 1k words

Max and Charles celebrate the end of the 2019 season in a hotel room. So soft, so fluffy, so satisfying.

Bruises by eefiplier - rating: E, 5.1k words

I think of this one as THE Lestappen smut fic. Oh my God, it's 5k words of amazing established relationship smut with all the feels. A classic. I can read this one over and over again.

outside the box by playclock (@endowataru) - rating: M, 6.1k words

Max falls in love with Charles' driving... oh and Charles himself too. They are ultra competitive idiots who are madly in love. There aren't enough established relationship fics out there, but this one is simply amazing. And don't forget to check out this author's profile for additional Lestappen fics. I promise every single one is a banger!

i made it link by link by purpleglasseswrites (@f-ferrari-forever) - rating: M, 4.2k words

Charles and Max try to be kinky, but who are they kidding - they are far too vanilla for that stuff. 🤣 This one is so sweet, and don't forget to read the sequel!

One man's trash, another man's treasure by AzziNow (@track-terror-apologist) - rating: T, 4.2k words

Charles turns into a raccoon and terrorizes everyone except Max. (Well, he terrorizes Max too... slightly.)

Call it madness, call it love… by AzziNow - rating: M, 3.5k words

Ferrari auctions off Charles for charity. No angst, just fluff. Alpha!Max/Alpha!Charles. So I confess that I never read A/B/O fics. There's nothing wrong with it - just not my cup of tea. But I really enjoyed this one. Al has such a chaotic sense of humour.

it all reminds me of you by grandprix (@grandprix-ao3) - rating: E, 3k words

Secret relationship Lestappen with flashbacks. Oh the yearning, the desire, the smut - incredibly satisfying. I must put a plug-in for this author's other Lestappen fics as well. Never misses - make sure to check them out!

burning you into my mind by thightattoos - rating: E, 4.1k words

Porn with feels and possessiveness. You cannot ask for anything more. I must have read this one a dozen times.

an evil plan or two by witchee_writer - rating: T, 5.2k words

Max and Charles are roped into a plan to get Brocedes back together; they come to a few realizations along the way. The only thing better than a Lestappen fic? A Lestappen AND Brocedes fic!

Fine Line by empireoffclouds - rating: NR, 7k words

One of the more light-hearted enemies to friends to lovers fics. I absolutely adore their dynamic here - it's snarky, warm, but also so them. The incomplete sequel is also a super fun read.

Into Darkness Of Thought by flamingosarepink - rating: T, 1k words

After the 2019 Japanese Grand Prix, Charles thinks Max isn't coming back to their shared space.

steal softly under castle walls by untouchableocean - rating: G, 521 words

Max gets home late from Milton Keynes and Charles has already fallen asleep. Short, tooth-rooting fluff of the best kind.

Zoomies by greeny1710 (@maxlambiase) - rating: E, 2.2k words

This one is just hilarious. A (mostly) naked Max walks into Charles' team Zoom call during the COVID lockdown.

...and many, many more that I'm sure I have forgotten! 🙈 You can also check out my AO3 bookmarks (the first few pages are pretty much all Lestappen fics).

Please remember to leave kudos and comments for these amazing writers. The talent in this fandom is absolutely incredible. They all deserve so much recognition. Happy reading!

#max verstappen #charles leclerc #lestappen #lestappen fic #fic recs #elle.ask #anon #a list of incredibly talented people #for reference #fave

[guacam011y]

Rewatching San Junipero and can’t help but think about a San Junipero! Ronance au 😭

If anyone feels inspired by this, feel free to write it 🩵

#san junipero #ronance #fruity four #Robin Buckley #Nancy wheeler #nancy wheeler x robin buckley #robin buckley x nancy wheeler #stranger things #spicy six #skittle six #lesbian #gay #bisexual #pride #pride month #Maya Hawke #Natalia after #Black Mirror #Netflix #gugu mbatha raw #mackenzie davis

[artsy-hobbitses]

Listen, I don’t know why the comics decided to make this absolute unit some bodybuilder, but he’s bringing chonky back, baby.  Rotger ‘Rotor’ Waldemar is the oldest of the team (discounting Dulcy, as dragons have a different bar for aging), clocking it at  35 and has the world-weariness to show for it. He was Charles’ apprentice in this AU and reluctantly took over Charles’ cyberkinetics project for war veterans when Charles was unceremoniously stripped from the position after a late beta test (involving Sonic’s father) went awry, but he from realised from going over the data input that the test had been sabotaged and tried to raise the alarm/get into contact with Charles about it, 

However Robotnik followed him right to where Charles was and nabbed both of them to press them into continuing the project so the device could be perfected/mass-produced. Initially Charles refused, but relented when Robotnik roboticized Rotger’s eye and promised to take away one of his apprentice’s body part for each ‘no’ he heard, and when the machine was completed, had the two of them choose between each other to test it. Charles elected to go so Rotger was spared. Behind Robotnik’s back however, he got to work figuring out a way to reverse-engineer the process before Sally and Antoine, having heard of his plight, attempt to rescue him (running into Sonic at the same time, who was attempting to rescue a captured Bunnie).  He’s protective over Sonic, who he recognizes as ‘Chuck’s scamp’ and feels heavy guilt over the fact that he’s the reason Sonic no longer has a flesh-and-blood uncle, but is also the one who eventually gives Charles back to Sonic when he masterminds a plan to download data containing Charles’ memories/personality (which Robotnik keeps in an archive similar to Black Mirror’s San Junipero episode, because that’s a terrible mind to waste and perhaps he would like to revisit it some time) to upload to Charles’ droid body. He wears leg braces for support the same way landlubbers wear swimfins underwater as like most sea-based Mobians, his flipper-feet are meant for swimming and not meant to hold up his weight vertically for long periods! He can’t much run, but his strength and intelligence usually make up for that. 

#rotor the walrus #sonic the hedgehog #Art #SATAM AU