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the1entirecircus · 2 months

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The kind of Pokémon I think each Legion of Doom member (along with a few other enemies of the league) would have and why:

The Joker

Mr. Mime- If you’ve been on the Internet long enough, you would remember how the Joker would always get paired with Mr. Mime. This would be true for my version of the Joker’s team. Except there is one major difference: Joker’s Mr. Mime is a Meta-Pokémon (mentioned in previous post about the JL’s Pokémon teams). This Mr. Mime would be Poison/Fairy with the ability Intimidate. Why Intimidate? Its a creepy clown with a creepy smile.

Weezing- Another Meta-Pokémon Joker would have, this version of Weezing is constantly spraying an obnoxious gas that makes people constantly laugh. This is of course in reference to the Joker's toxic gas.

Gengar- Gengar has been noted to being incredibly sadistic from killing people just to make them ghosts like Gengar is. This reason is rooted in a deep loneliness Gengar has, which kind of makes him kind of pathetic. Similar with Joker, who is pathetic, no matter what retelling of his origin you here.

Remoraid- A reference to the Joker Fish, Meta-Remoraid is Water/Dark, sadistically firing water at enemies. Due to it becoming a Meta-Pokemon, it can no longer evolve

Toxicroak- Growing up with the Batman tv show, I am used to seeing the Joker as a capable fighter. Based on its dex entries saying that it sways and dodges attacks from opponents, it sounds fairly similar to the Joker's fighting method in the tv show.

Seviper- A Pokemon with an arch-rivalry with another, Seviper holds similar traits to the Joker.

Type overlap was bound to happen for the Joker's team. It's the Joker, poison is his thing. So, it had felt obvious to me to give him a bunch of poison types.

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Lex Luthor

Silvally- A Pokémon developed to destroy aliens, hmmm, where have I heard that before in terms of DC Characters? But yeah, Silvally felt like an obvious choice for Lex because he totally would develop one to defeat Ultra Beasts and Superman.

Alakazam- Being a very smart man, Lex having an Alakazam would reflect his great intellect.

Porygon-Z- Another artificial pokemon made by mankind, this pokemon reflect's how even with advanced technology, there is some flaw in it that weakens Lex.

Volcarona- Being revered as a "sun deity" by ancient Unovans, this felt like a good Pokemon to be transformed into a meta-pokemon by lex. Now with the ability Red Sun, Lex's Volcarona weakens kryptonian meta-pokemon.

Kryptonian Minior (Green Core)- A radioactive green rock falls from the sky? Why that must be a meteor of kryptonite? Right? Nope! Regional variant of Minior thats Poison/Flying type.

Shiny Palafin- Being a pokemon inspired by Superman, Lex of course had to have a shiny Palafin to reflect how he created Bizarro.

If you couldn't tell already, Lex's team is inspired by the many ways he's tried to defeat Superman over the years. From the creation of a synthetic organism capable of fighting aliens to creating an evil doppelganger of his arch nemesis, these Pokemon all reflect Lex's schemes in some way.

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Cheetah

Chien-Pao- In her New 52 origin, Barbara Minerva would stab herself in the name of her goddess to transform into the Cheetah according to the DC Wiki. She use the god-killer knife to do so, and while Chien-Pao is no Cheetah (A leopard actually) and has a sword and not a knife, there are slight parallels.

Runerigus- Barbara is an archaelogist.

Cofagrigus- Same reason as previous

Sneasler- Sneasler is a femine Pokemon that utilizes its sharp claws in both climbing and combat. Yes I could've used a different cat pokemon, but this one felt better as Sneasler is one of the many pokemon that was worshipped by the Peal Clan in ancient Sinnoh/Hisui.

Spiritomb- Again archaeology, but also a parallel to Cheetah's mystical acts of villainy.

Hydrapple- This pokemon was chosen out of Cheetah's love for Greek Mythology, and while Hydrapple is not the only Multi-headed dragon pokemon, it is the most similar to the Hydra.

If you couldn't tell, Cheetah's team is consistent of Pokemon relating to mythology and archaeology. I didn't want to give her just cat pokemon because that seems really reductive to her character. Yes, she was turned into a cat, but that doesn't mean she has to have a bunch of cat pokemon. Catwoman on the other hand would have a bunch of Cat pokemon.

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Reverse Flash (Eobard Thawne)

Raichu- because of Raichu's problem of getting angry every time it build's up too much electricity, it reminds of a lot of Thawne's angry temperment and how he relieves it by doing petty things...its a bit of a stretch I know. Eobard's Raichu is a Meta-Pokemon connected to the Negative Speed Force. This gives it the ability Negative Pulse, the more damage this pokemon takes, the stronger their attacks become.

Midnight Lycanroc- Its a very angry dog that seems to have more personality than the Midday form. This pokemon is also connected to the Negative Speed Force and now has the ability Pettiness and the signature move Phase Claw. Pettiness activates whenever the enemy goes first or uses a priorty move to go first. The pokemon with the ability then hits the target with an attack boost. As for phase claw, the user's claws move so fast that they sink right into the target, landing a critical hit.

Blaziken- Bred with the ability Speed Boost, this is Eobard's reverse of Cinderace as this pokemon is also charged with Negative Speed Force energy to make it a Meta-Pokemon. The things changed is that Blaziken is now naturally faster than Cinderace.

Ceruldege- Now while an odd-choice to parallel Pawmot, Ceruledge's signature move saps energy from the target while Pawmot's S.M. can restore a Pokemon.

Obstagoon- Obstagoon is meant to reflect how much crueler Reverse Flash is to Barry as Obstagoon is very different compared to the other kinds of Linoone. It is also a Meta-Pokemon with negative speed force power. This gave it a higher speed stat and the ability Revolt, which causes damage to enemy targets who use physical moves on the pokemon.

Electrode- Its one of the fastest pokemon in the game currently. Electrode also has a connection to the Negative Speed Force giving it the Dark type.

Two big components to Eobard's Pokemon is that they're meant to be evil mirrors of Barry's pokemon from my previous post, and that they're all meant to be stronger than Barry's pokemon. All of Eobard's pokemon are either naturally better than Barry's or augmented to be better. Eobard has been shown to know more about the Speed Force than Barry does in the comics. From how to influence time to how to utilize phasing, Eobard knows a lot. Therefore, he would know how to influence his Pokemon's abilities once they were connected to the Negative Speed Force, paralleling his creation of the Acololytes of Zoom in the New 52.

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Captain Cold

Glaceon- Before anyone asks, yes. Every member of the Rogues (the team) has an Eeveelution. Leonard Snart would of course have Glaceon in his team.

Mr. Rime- A major factor Captain Cold has to overcome when performing a Bank Heist is the Flash. So what does he do? Create a layer of ice for the Flash to slip over on. While no dex entries state that Mr. Rime can do this, its pre-evolution of Galarian Mr. Mime has dex entries stating it can.

Delibird- Little known fact about the Rogues is that they're not all-inherently evil. Yes they commit crimes, but its for the money. They don't kill cops, women, or children. So having Delibird is a reflection of that.

Galarian Slowbro- Back during the New 52, Captain Cold fused himself with the powers of his cold gun. A Meta Galarian Slowbro is similar to Cold's transformation as it isn't just a Slowbro now, but a Slowbro with the abilities of a Shellder. Now a Ice/Psychic type, Snart's Slowbro is now capable of freezing enemies with chilling blasts.

Octillery- During the Rebirth era of DC Comics, the Flash went up against Captain cold who had obtained an improved Cold Gun modified by Black Hole's stolen speed force tech. Meta-Octillery reflects this by being a Ice/Electric Type and having the ability to freeze everything with its new attack Octobeam, an ice move which has the ability to freeze targets entirely.

Blastoise- Not only a reference to his cold-gun, but a reference to his current state in the comics. Snart was given cybernetic enhancements to fight Barry Allen with. Before anyone wonders, no, this is not a meta-pokemon, its just a regular blastoise.

Snart was initially just going to have a bunch of Ice-types with no thought added to them. Then I came to realize that the character deserves much more justice than that. He is a strategist, a bad man with a good heart, and a fighter.

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Sinestro

Darkrai- Being that this mythical pokemon causes nightmares, Sinestro having a Darkrai is an easy to answer question.

Mimikyu- Given that this pokemon's appearance can cause death upon seeing it, I wouldn't be surprised if Sinestro used this pokemon's ability to his advantage.

Blacephalon- This Ultra Beast is said to sneak up on people and then violently explode to startle them. As it craves on fear, it feels like a good pokemon for Sinestro to have.

Shiny Naganadel- This pokemon both reflects Sinestro's color scheme, but also provides a sadistic way to scare enemies.

Gallade- A meta-variant of the pokemon, this pokemon is meant to reflect how Sinestro was once noble and one of the greatest green lanterns of all time. Meta-Gallade keeps the same typing but it instead preys on the target's fear. Its new ability "Terrorize" reflects this by having opponents drastically lower their attack when Gallade enters battle.

Due to my lack of knowledge on the character, I didn't give him a full team. I did try to find a pokemon who would fit his time as an ultra-violet lantern, but none felt right.

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Black Manta

Sharpedo- This felt like an obvious choice considering that this pokemon is regarded as the Bully of the Sea and Black Manta is...something else, I'll tell you what.

Basculegion- This Pokémon is known to have evolved because of its fallen comrades. Black Manta’s origin involves him trying to avenge his father’s death. Now while this is very different from Basculegion’s reason for evolving, it isn’t that different.

Intelleon- Considering that Black Manta is a highly-weaponized killer with many gadgets, Intelleon felt like a good match for him.

Cradily- At first this may seem like an odd choice until you consider that Black Manta has a slight degree of knowledge on Atlantean Archaelogy. Cradily reflects this as while it is a product of paleontology, it is still an aquatic species. Its adjacent to Atlantean Archaelogy, meaning this is a stretch of a choice.

Kilowattrel- According to Lockstin & Gnoggin's video about this pokemon, Kilowattrel is based on pirates, and what is Black Manta? A pirate with a goofy helmet.

Genesect- In terms of desing, Genesect looks like a purple Black Manta with a giant laser canon on its back.

Black Manta's pokemon weren't that difficult to come up with. I didn't want to give him too many water types, but since there are a few pokemon that aren't water-type but water-adjacent, I thought, why not?

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Non-League Villains:

Darkseid

Scizor- Compared to what's to come, Scizor feels like an out of place choice until you consider Parademons. Parademons are seen as Darkseid's minions, and they do share a small resemblance to Scizor...ignoring that its red and is more bug like. Darkseid's Scizor is a Meta-Pokemon with the ability Army's Strength which increases the user's attack and defense the more pokemon are on your team.

Tyranitar- Being based on Godzilla, Tyranitar's lore states that it has destructive power capable of destroying mountains and flattening mountains. In a few depictions, Darkseid is a force to be reckoned with, demolishing anything to get what he wants.

Malamar- Darkseid's biggest goal that he has often achieved is to obtain the Anti-Life equation. In short, the equation acts as a sort of mind control that extends Darkseid's presence onto others. Malamar is known for mind control, but I would assume Darkseid would want to take a step further on that. So his Malamar is also a Meta-Pokemon with the ability "Anti-Life" an ability that inflicts confusion to any surrounding pokemon once this pokemon enters the battle.

Origine Giratina- While in no way are Giratina and Darkseid similar in origin, they are similar in Power. New Gods affect reality on a grand scale. Final Crisis shows how a New God like Darkseid falling on the multiverse can lead to devastating things. Giratina is the one responsible for the Space-Time Rift over Hisui in Pokemon Legends Arceus. I assume Darkseid would of course want to take advantage of this power.

Dawn Wings Necrozma- While Lunala itself would have been a good way to represent Darkseid's ability to create Boom Tubes, Dawn Wings Necrozma felt like the better option to me for the fact it seizes power over Lunala. Necrozma also connects with my previous statement about Darkseid being a cosmic being.

Primal Groudon- This is an obvious choice but to add context, Primal Groudon has the Omega Symbol on its hands. That and it is volcanic pokemon with tremendous power. It is also one of the strongest pokemon in Gen 7 with a high base-stat total.

Darkseid's pokemon were mostly easy to come up with. Given his status as a New God, giving him several Legendary pokemon didn't feel wrong to me.

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Mongul

Gloom- A reference to the black mercy, Mongul's Gloom is a meta-pokemon with the ability Fantasize where enemy pokemon have their health sapped away while getting an increase in their strongest stats.

Ceruledge

Armarouge

Gallade

Kommo-o

Iron Valiant- My first comic introduction to the character was in Dark Nights: Metal. In the first issue, the Justice League fight against creations of Toyman commissioned by Mongul. This is a reference to that.

I didn't give descriptions to Ceruledge, Armarouge, Gallade, and Kommo-o, as they're all mostly self-explanatory: They're fighters that Mongul would put in a gladiator arena.

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Vandal Savage

Slowking- Being as old as he is, Vandal has witnessed many things and influenced many historical events. Slowking reflects this through its own wisdom.

Ursaluna- Since Vandal has been in many areas, him obtaining pokemon that are supposed to be extinct is of no surprise. Ursaluna would be one of them.

Kabutops- Although rare, Kabuto is still not extinct. Vandal obtaining one would no surprise me.

Noivern- This choice is a nod to how after Final Crisis, Vandal fought Batman who had been sent back in time.

Absol- Initially this choice would seem odd until you realize that having a pokemon with foresight is a good idea for an immortal like Vandal.

Mega Lucario- Three of the aliases Vandal has taken up was Alexander the Great, Khufu, and Khafre. With these numerous ties to Egypt, giving Vandal a Lucario makes sense, especially if it were a mega lucario as he would have been alive around that time mega-evolution happened.

I had thought about giving Vandal a Meta-Pokemon to stay in theme with the other pokemon, but I like the idea of him having to capture new pokemon as time goes on as death touches everything mortal.

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Starro the Conqueror

Starmie

Yes, Starro would have an army of Starmie.

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Anti-Monitor

Regieleki- Regieleki by itself represents the electric age and can produce tremendous amounts of power. Anti-Monitor's Meta-Regieleki is capable of doing the same, but this time with Anti-Matter. This is reflected in its new ability Anti-Particle where type match-ups are swapped for the pokemon with this ability. The Special Attack of this pokemon has also been swapped with its Speed stat.

Regidrago- Regidrago represents the Medieval age and is believed to have the powers of every dragon pokemon. Anti-Monitor's Meta-Regidrago also has this ability, but its connection to Giratina is enhanced. Its new ability Shadowy Maw enhances both Dragon and Ghost type attacks. Regidrago however is still pure dragon.

Regirock- Regirock represents the stone age and is made purely out of rock. Anti-Monitor's Regirock is very different from this as it is now a Ground type due to its composition. It's defense stat has swapped places with its Attack stat. Its new ability Refract warps any stat changes to do the opposite effect.

Regice- Regice represents the ice age and is made purely out of ice. Anti-Monitor's Regice is the opposite, becoming a Water type due to its composition being different. It also has the refract ability

Registeel- Registeel represents the industrial revolution and is made of an unidentified metal. Anti-Monitor's Registeel is the opposite as it is now a Fire type due to its composition. Its defense and sp. defense have swapped places with its Attack and Sp. Attack.

Regigigas- Regigigas is the creator of the five different Regis. Ant-Monitor's Meta-Regigigas did the same, but since it too is composed of anti-monitor, it is very different from Regigigas. Now a pure Ghost type, Meta-Regigas's attack stat has swapped with its sp. attack stat. Its new ability, Slow Build, its special attack and speed stat are halved for five turns.

The choice to give the Anti-Monitor the six Regis was an idea I made out of the idea that the Anti-Monitor's goal was to create its own anti-matter universe. So, each Pokemon is both representative of its power and destructive ability. I originally planned on giving him Meta-versions of Marshadow, Gardevoir, and Gigantamax Duraludon to represent the Shadow Demons, Harbinger and Pariah, as well as the anti-monitor's tower things.

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This took forever and I am so glad I've gotten it done. The Bat family will be next followed up by the Teen Titans and then Suicide Squad. Might do the Spider-Man variants after that.

Justice League Pokemon Teams

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stuff-diary · 4 months

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The Brothers Sun

TV Shows/Dramas watched in 2024

The Brothers Sun (2024, USA)

Directors: Kevin Tancharoen & Viet Nguyen

Creators: Brad Falchuk & Byron Wu

Mini-review:

This was a very fun and entertaining binge-watch, although it's rather inconsistent in almost every way: the directing, the writing, the fight scenes and the acting of the supporting cast. All these elements have good and even brilliant moments, but they also have mediocre and downright bad moments. Luckily, the three leads always keep the ship afloat with their performances. It's great to see Michelle Yeoh getting the meaty roles she deserves, and both Justin Chien and Sam Song Li are two charismatic newcomers I'll pay attention to in the future. Anyway, despite its many flaws, I enjoyed The Brothers Sun and I ended up growing fond the characters. The ending was pretty satisfactory, but it's clear the writers left doors open for further seasons, and I wouldn't mind getting more.

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vrijaziatisch · 3 months

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PAC x Netflix – Meet the Brothers Sun

Netflix Nederland en Pan Asian Collective organiseren op dinsdag 23 januari 2024 in het Rozentheater Amsterdam een avondje samen met acteurs Justin Chien, Sam Song Li en Highdee Kuan. We gaan met elkaar in gesprek over Aziatische representatie in film en TV en over hun ervaringen op de set van de nieuwe Netflix-show ‘The Brothers Sun’. Wat kunnen wij van hen leren en hoe helpt dit Aziatische representatie in Nederland/Europa?

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pinnithin-writes · 3 years

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Good Jokes

Chapter 17

Benrey very wisely made himself scarce after that. Tommy wasn’t sure where he was or what he was doing, but he was grateful for the brief reprieve as he and the other scientists fought their way through another underground tunnel.

Gordon tried his best to lighten the journey somewhat by engaging the others in conversation when he could. Tommy was struck once again by his rapid-fire mouth, still able to speak non stop while going through literal hell. It became a comforting white noise to him, a gauge on how well things were faring as they picked off aliens and crossed more toxic waste. Screaming? Generally a bad sign. But Gordon asked him what his favorite TV show was when things were calm, and for a second Tommy almost felt normal.

He was having difficulty stringing words together in response, he was so tired. The arm still full of shrapnel ached. Tommy trailed wearily behind, letting the others take the lead and vent their frustrations by filling soldiers with bullets.

A deep, basslike rumble up ahead sent vibrations rippling down the hall. The hair on the back of Tommy’s neck stood on end. He had a guess why Benrey had suddenly vanished.

“What is that sound?” Gordon wondered aloud as they approached an industrial sliding door.

Bubby cocked his head, listening intently. “It sounds like a… like a dog?” he guessed.

He wasn’t wrong - this was the sound a dog would make if its lungs were the size of loveseats. It echoed fantastically against the metal walls in this tunnel deep within the earth. Tommy’s pulse kicked up, questions racing through his head as his teammates continued to speculate.

“A dog?” Gordon repeated, sounding troubled. “Oh, they got attack dogs? Oh, come on.”

Coomer was shaking his head, the grip on his assault gun steely and tight as the barking steamrolled over them. “No, no I don’t think Black Mesa has ever had any attack dogs,” he said.

“But, the military - I - we,” Gordon paused, contemplative. “We wiped out the military,” he reasoned.

The floor shook with the powerful bass of the sound. Tommy’s breathing was becoming irregular now as he shouldered his rifle. How had this beast wound up miles underground? Why were they all still standing around out here talking about it?

Tommy found his voice, urgency making his syllables thin. “Why I - that sounds familiar,” he said. “Open the door.”

Gordon shot him a puzzled look. “What? What do you mean, familiar?” he asked.

Tommy could only stare pleadingly back, unable to find the verbiage to explain. He needed to see for himself. The corners of Gordon’s eyes softened from their confused crinkle. Perhaps it was because Tommy so rarely asked anyone to do anything that he didn’t waste time waiting for a response.

“Hit the button!” Gordon commanded, gesturing to the panel. “Someone hit the button.”

Bubby was way ahead of him. “I gotcha,” he said, punching in the door code.

The barking persisted, rattling their teeth as the entryway slid open. An identical door lay only a few yards beyond, and Tommy’s stomach turned anxiously as they stepped forward. Gordon approached with his gun at the ready, the others following with some trepidation. Tommy felt sick. He knew that bark all too well. He’d know it at the end of the world.

Bubby unlocked the remaining door. As the steel panels hissed back, Gordon muttered an astonished, “Oh my god.”

He was here. Tommy’s brilliant, perfect star of a dog, surrounded on all sides by turrets. The massive beast sat in the center of the bristling circle of guns, coat glittering with starshine, eyes as fathomless as twin black holes. His paws alone were enough to crush a man, and his teeth gleamed long and dangerous. Sunkist swung his head in their direction and let out an angry bark that blew their hair back.

THOMAS. YOU HAVE ARRIVED.

A wave of relief rolled over Tommy, followed by a crash of distress shortly after. Sunkist wasn’t supposed to be here. Yes, the creature was immortal, but he was also intelligent, steering clear of danger like a good dog was trained to do. The fact that he was this far from home didn’t bode well, if the guns pointed at him weren’t already indicative of that.

Tommy felt his own voice rise in octave as he cried out. “No Sunkist, what are you - Sun - doing here?”

“That’s Sunkist?” Gordon asked. He sounded awed, eyes wide as he took in the sight of the two ton juggernaut of an animal in front of him.

Sunkist wagged his long tail in a powerful sweep. I WAS BROUGHT HERE BY AN INSUFFERABLE MAN.

Before Tommy could wonder who this insufferable man was, a rough voice called out from behind the circle of turrets. “Welcome again!”

Oh, christ. This guy. Tommy felt Sunkist’s rage run through his own body, an undercurrent to his very blood. The paratrooper from before was standing a healthy distance away from his dog, a detonator clutched in one hand. Even from this far away, Tommy could see that he was terrified, quaking in his little soldier boy boots. Sunkist barked again. He wanted to use Forzen as a chew toy.

“Hey,” Gordon answered loudly, crossing the threshold. “What are you doin’ to his dog, man? Why do you have his dog?”

“Let Sunkist go!” Tommy called over his shoulder.

This man was going to get eaten alive, in quite the literal sense. Sunkist was the perfect dog, obedient to a fault, but he could only fight instinct for so long, poised as he was like a cosmic bear trap. He could feel the beast’s ire rolling off him in waves.

“What are they doing to that poor dog?” Coomer remarked.

“The fiend,” Bubby spat.

Forzen brandished the detonator in a threat. “Do not - do not come any further,” he shouted, raising his voice over Sunkist’s barking. “I’m the remaining - I’m the US military… left.”

Tommy almost pitied him, he sounded at such a loss. It’s possible he may not have taken into account all the dangers associated with angering an immortal, telepathic dog. Tommy suspected Benrey had sprung him out of the pocket dimension he’d banished him to a few days ago, but how the entity convinced the soldier to set up this elaborate scheme was beyond him.

“Gordon, bad news,” Dr. Coomer interjected. “There is one remaining member of the United States military, and he’s taken Sunkist hostage!”

Tommy frowned. Hostage was a strong word.

“He’s got us pinned against the wall,” Gordon agreed. “Okay-”

Forzen cut him off, ignoring Gordon to stare directly at Tommy. “Viens pas pres du chien sinon je vais le tuer!”

Don’t come near the dog or I’ll kill it. Tommy worried at his bottom lip, feeling Sunkist’s animosity crashing against his own. Did Forzen know? Had Benrey informed him of Sunkist’s nature? Or was this just some scheme the entity had put together to get his former best friend torn limb from limb, inconveniencing Tommy in the process? He wasn’t sure what to think. All he knew was that he was growing angrier by the second, stress pulling him taut like a rubber band.

“What?” Gordon called back, his voice confrontational and harsh. “Was that French?”

“Do you speak French, Gordon?” Coomer asked, inclining his head.

Gordon ignored him. “You speaking French, motherfucker?” he snarled. “Do I have to shoot you? What do you want?”

A flicker of Forzen’s old smirk flashed across his face. “Je vais tuer le chien,” he told Gordon unhelpfully.

“Gordon, this is French for ‘he’s going to kill the dog,’” Dr. Coomer intoned.

Sunkist rumbled the room like a generator as he growled low in his throat. I AM UNKILLABLE.

Tommy nodded sympathetically, his throat tight. I know you are, boy. His hands were beginning to shake. He balled them into fists and stuffed them in the pockets of his coat.

Gordon did not seem to remember this particular detail, either, keeping his aim trained on the soldier as he negotiated the situation. “Why - what do you want from us, man?” he asked.

“I am the remaining member of the US military!” Forzen reiterated, spreading his arms wide in some sort of sick triumph.

The sob that escaped Tommy surprised him. “Let Sunkist go!” he cried again. He was so angry. He was so tired. This week long nightmare had taken everything he had, and now even his dog was a part of the cosmic bargain. He bowed his head and sucked in a shuddering breath, blinking back the tears that were rapidly welling in his eyes.

This was so stupid. Sunkist was immortal, for fuck’s sake. He should just turn the beast loose, cut him free with a single word and let him sink his teeth into the soldier. It was what he deserved for kidnapping someone’s dog, after all. Stupid. Stupid circumstances in a stupid warehouse in a stupid facility in a stupid apocalypse. Stupid, stupid, stupid-

A warm hand squeezed Tommy’s shoulder, and he looked up to meet Gordon’s eyes, flooded with concern.

No words were spoken, just a fleeting exchange of expressions.

You good?

I’ll be fine.

Anything I can do?

I’ve got it, thank you.

Gordon nodded, released him, and turned a glare back on Forzen.

The emotional one-eighty of feeling so cared for and understood in the middle of such an upsetting situation gave Tommy pause, but only for a brief moment. No, he couldn’t let Sunkist dismember this mortal right before Gordon’s eyes - he had already seen enough gore and bloodshed for an entire lifetime. Use that big brain of yours, Tommy. You can think your way out of this. “Okay y- Okay,” Gordon addressed the man with the detonator. “You're the last remaining member of the military, but what do you - what d - what?”

As the two of them spoke, Tommy slunk around the perimeter of the room until he could tuck himself into the operating booth for the warehouse lift. Sunkist’s eyes swung to follow him, expectant. The creature’s hackles were still raised, but he was relaxing by the second now that Tommy was there. He wagged his tail, nearly taking Forzen’s head off in the process.

THOMAS. DO NOT BE UPSET. LET US ENGAGE IN A PLAYFUL ACTIVITY.

Tommy scanned the controls, wiping a tear track from his face with the sleeve of his coat for Sunkist’s sake. He was such a good dog. “Maybe later, buddy,” he murmured. He found the lever that controlled the lift Forzen was standing on and gripped it in his hand, waiting. His eyes tracked the conversation between Gordon and the soldier like he was watching a tennis match.

At last, Forzen presented his demands, once he recovered from narrowly avoiding decapitation. “Please dispel the rumor that Irate Gamer ripped off Angry Video Game Nerd,” he said.

His words rang in a good ten seconds of subsequent silence. Gordon’s mouth was partially open, brow drawn and uncomprehending, while Bubby and Coomer exchanged a perplexed glance. Tommy rubbed at his temple with his free hand. He knew fear made people say some wild stuff, but this was some nonsense even he couldn’t parse.

“Exc- what? What?” Gordon managed to ask.

Tommy threw the lever. He was sick of this guy. Forzen may not deserve to be ripped apart by a beast the size of a snow plow, but he had still threatened his dog and held up their progress with his inane bullshit. He could rot in the belly of Black Mesa for all he cared. Metal squealed against metal as the lift began to descend.

Gordon was in action as soon as he noticed the platform moving. “Oh shit, get the dog!” he shouted. “Get the dog!”

Bubby patted his knees and beckoned to Sunkist, which was a pretty funny sight considering the animal was twelve feet tall. “Come here, boy, come on!”

Sunkist turned his fathomless, starfield of a gaze on the prototype, unimpressed. SNAKE. I HAVE SEEN YOUR INTENTS, AND YOUR FOUL DEEDS WILL NOT ESCAPE MY JUDGMENT.

Tommy sighed while Bubby took a faltering step backward. It’s okay, Sunkist, he’s with us. He peered down the shaft where the lift was descending, raising his voice to be heard over the distance. “Let Sunkist go,” he called. “I hit the button!”

“I’m gonna shoot the dog!” Forzen hollered back.

Gordon vaulted up onto the catwalk beside the pit, hanging over the railing to get a bead on the soldier. “Oh shit, move, he’s still got the button for the turrets!” he barked.

Sunkist looked to Tommy for confirmation. He nodded, and the ground shook with the beast’s pawsteps as he stepped out of the circle, knocking over one of the firearms in the process. Coomer and Bubby gave Sunkist a wide berth as they joined Gordon on the catwalk.

Forzen had no idea what was happening up top as he sank slowly downward. He waved his arms wildly. “I’ll activate the turrets!” he screamed. “I’ll kill the dog!”

Sunkist’s black hole stare landed on Tommy again. THOMAS. I WISH TO DESTROY HIM.

Tommy shook his head as he exited the control booth to gain a better vantage of the situation. Not this time, buddy . Sunkist whined, and it sounded like the screeching brakes of a semi truck. He ambled back into the circle of turrets so he could peer down the shaft at his desired prey.

“No! What the fuck!” Gordon’s voice rang shrill across the warehouse. “T-Tommy, how did you train your dog - he just walked back into the turrets!” He took a step toward the animal, but Dr. Coomer flung out a hand in warning stopping him in his tracks.

“Gordon, look out,” he cautioned, “the dog is in the firing line of the turrets.”

“Yeah, he went back!” Gordon cried in exasperation. Before Tommy could open his mouth to assure him he’d be fine, Gordon returned his attention to the soldier growing smaller and smaller on the lift ramp. “Hey, up here, you're talkin’ to me.” he said, squinting as he focused his gaze. “Is that you, Forzen? You rat fuck? You’re-”

“Irate Gamer Chris Bores did not rip off Angry Video Game Nerd James Rolfe!” Forzen interrupted distantly, sliding out of view. “Goodbye!”

A perplexed laugh leapt out of Gordon. “What do you-?” he waved him off, giving up, and called across the warehouse to Tommy instead. “Hey, can - Tommy, can you just grab the dog-” but the rest of his words were drowned out by a cacophony of artillery fire.

Sunkist was the perfect dog. Immortal, resplendent, made of star stuff. He stood unaffected in the crown of bullets pelleting his coat, dissolving them in a flashfire upon impact. He was a testament to the cosmos, a splendid blazing canid star. A creature the Sirius constellation itself would admire. Tommy’s heart swelled with pride as man's best friend lolled his tongue out and wagged his tail through the sheet of gunfire.

Across the chasm, he could see the other scientists staring, openmouthed, at the animal. They passed a few stunned remarks to one another, but Tommy couldn’t hear them over the roar of the artillery.

“Sunkist lives forever,” he told them, shouting over the din. “I was just worried that - that would - would, like, trick…”

He trailed off, realizing his teammates probably couldn’t hear him. Sunkist’s jaws slavered with anticipation as he peered down the shaft at the soldier he intended to eat, paying the gunfire no mind until it finally died down. There was a beat of silence, and then Gordon was filling it with words again.

“Can you call the dog out of the turrets?” he asked.

Tommy paused, raising his eyebrows authoritatively as he addressed his pet. “Sunkist, can you move two feet to the right?”

Sunkist lifted his head and stared at him, eyes like the bottom of the ocean. VERY WELL. He reluctantly padded away from the turrets, nails clacking on the metal floors. Tommy stepped down to join him. This good boy deserved some scritches.

“Okay, he’s pretty receptive,” Gordon said, giving an impressed nod. “Alright, cool. Hey, I’m gonna go confront him,” he called to the team, steadying his gun arm. He plunged down into the darkness without a second’s hesitation. “Hey, son!”

Chuckling at the man’s fearlessness, Tommy tangled his hands in Sunkist’s soft golden fur. Some of the tension melted out of his shoulders as he pet his dog repetitively, feeling his heart rate slow as he let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding. He needed this. Sunkist stooped down and sniffed the blood on his clothes with interest.

THOMAS, YOU ARE INJURED. WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS.

Tommy winced, remembering the shrapnel embedded in his arm. “I’m - it’s okay. They’re not a problem anymore.” he scratched his silky coat idly as he went on. “Why are you here? How did he find you?”

THE HELLION FROM THE OTHER REALM LOCATED ME AND LEFT ME WITH HIS INSUFFERABLE FRIEND.

So Benrey did have something to do with this. A sigh of frustration climbed out of Tommy. What was the point of all of this? Just to yank his chain? “Why did you go with him?” he asked.

Sunkist panted like a gale force wind as Tommy scratched him in a particularly enjoyable spot. I THOUGHT DOING SO WOULD MEAN FINDING YOU FASTER.

Tommy’s heart squeezed. ‘God’ spelled backwards really was ‘dog.’ He pressed his face into the animal’s fur, closing his eyes and wishing he was home in his living quarters, or at his father’s house, laying on the floor with his best friend. Pondering what he would make for dinner. Where they would go on their next walk. Nothing tried to kill them and nothing smelled like blood.

He ached with how badly he wanted this to be over.

Sunkist raised his massive head, pricking his ears toward the yawning chasm. YOUR COMPANIONS ARE LEAVING YOU, he noted.

“They won’t,” Tommy reassured him, pulling back to collect himself, and as he said it he knew it was true.

Gordon would never abandon him, and he was almost certain the same fact applied to Dr. Coomer. Bubby’s loyalty was questionable, but he would at least allow himself to be bullied by the others into holding back. It was a new feeling, one he wasn’t used to. Having friends. Knowing they were there for him.

They would wait up, but he shouldn’t leave them hanging. He tilted his gaze fondly up at Sunkist. “Let’s go.”

At the bottom of the industrial lift, Tommy was met by the others and the fresh corpses of numerous aliens. They were smears of yellow and green on the floor of what looked to be a storage room for shipping containers. Gordon was pacing the area and running his functional hand through his hair frustratedly. Tommy folded his arms and leaned back against a crate to watch him while Sunkist sat obediently at his side.

“Where’d he go?” Gordon growled. “He got away again. Fucker.” He caught sight of Tommy and his eyes lit up. Correcting his course to approach him and Sunkist, he flung out an animated gesture of agitation. “I wanted to shoot his ass for endangering a poor, sweet dog.”

Tommy found that funny, snorting as he tried to imagine Sunkist as anything other than the dazzling and dangerous creature he was. Gordon gave him one of those signature dimpled smiles Tommy loved so much before sliding his gaze up to the twelve foot beast before him.

“So Tommy, that’s - that’s Sunkist?” he asked.

“Sunki - yes.”

Sunkist studied Gordon critically before passing his judgment. YOU ARE A FOOL IN A MAN’S CLOTHES, he decided, addressing the man directly in his mind. Tommy didn’t miss the shiver of awe that raced down Gordon’s entire body as the message was received.

“I dunno, Sunkist,” he said, shrugging and grinning over at Gordon. “I kinda like him.”

The deep blush that colored his cheeks made Tommy’s smile pull even wider.

Sunkist wagged his tail good naturedly. PERHAPS THAT MAKES YOU A FOOL, AS WELL.

Maybe it did. That was fine by him. He’d put on the cap and the jingly shoes and do a little dance in front of a king and his court. There goes Tommy Coolatta, certified fool. His feelings for Gordon ran so deep by now that he was sure he’d drown in them if he tried to fight it.

Gordon reached out his hand, hesitated, and looked to Tommy for permission. He was still blushing. “Can I pet him?” he asked.

“Go ahead.”

After tackling his initial trepidation, Gordon got that misty-eyed look on his face that people so often did when they were petting a dog. He kept his modified arm at his side while he combed through the silky fur of Sunkist’s chest, his smile open and relaxed. God, he was gorgeous. He could imagine him petting Sunkist like that in front of the television in Tommy’s living room on a hot summer evening. He tossed the fantasy from his mind before he could dwell on it.

Instead, he tore his eyes away to address Bubby and Dr. Coomer, who were hovering awkwardly a few yards away. He inclined his head in invitation; they could all use a little dog therapy right now. The two of them, however, shook their heads. Perhaps the appeal of a handsome golden retriever was somewhat diminished when that retriever could eat you in one bite.

“He looks a little… too pristine,” Gordon commented.

Sunkist huffed directly into Gordon’s face, trying to look irritated despite the wonderful petting he was receiving. I AM PERFECT.

Tommy tipped his head in amusement. “Why, what’s wrong with him? Do you think there’s something wrong with him?”

Gordon faltered as he met the eyes of Tommy’s greatest invention. “No, I think - I don’t think he’s - I think he’s okay,” he stammered. “But, like… is this just what he looks-”

“Oh, he better be better than okay. This is - Sunkist is the perfect dog.” He patted the creature’s side approvingly.

Gordon opened his mouth, closed it, then opened it again, struggling as he chose his words carefully. “He looks kinda like a JPEG, man,” he finally said.

Confusion clouded Tommy’s thoughts as well as his expression. A JPEG? Like, a digital image? He searched Gordon’s face, trying to parse his meaning behind the lenses of his glasses. Oh. Oh my god. His glasses were still broken.

“A what?” Coomer asked, while Bubby uttered, “Rude.”

Tommy stifled a laugh, wondering how badly his depth perception was fucked right now. “What do you mean, what’s a JPEG?”

Gordon could sense he was being made fun of, but wasn’t quite sure how, brow wrinkling in a curious smile. He withdrew his hand from Sunkist’s fur and gave the dog an up-and-down gesture. “He looks pretty - he look kinda flat,” he insisted.

Sunkist whuffed. DID I NOT TELL YOU HE WAS A FOOL?

“I don’t - I don’t understand what you mean, because I - it - everything looks like an image in real life, Mr. Freeman,” Tommy wheezed. “That - are you goin’ crazy?”

But he took pity and fixed his glasses for him with a gentle wave of his hand. Gordon blinked, removing the lenses from his face both to inspect them and to give Tommy a humorous, head-shaking smile. He pushed the frames back up the bridge of his nose. Yeah, Tommy should have taken care of that sooner.

Dr. Coomer spoke up, continuing the joke. “Gordon, did you know that our eyes perceive everything as images?”

Gordon turned to offer him a sunny retort, cutting himself off midsentence when his eyes caught something behind one of the shipping crates. He took off at a rapid clip, gun raised in a threat. Tommy exchanged a glance with Bubby and Coomer and they all hurried after him.

Turns out Forzen had been hiding amongst the containers this entire time. Why he didn’t take this opportunity to shoot any of them was a mystery to Tommy, and he pondered this passively as Gordon cornered the soldier, backing him against the wall with the minigun pointed at his face. The rest of the team clambered atop the structure, flanking Gordon and Forzen on all sides. Even Sunkist loomed his bottomless gaze at their target, the ruff of his neck standing on end with impatience.

Gordon tried once again to make heads or tails of the paratrooper’s insane request. “You want me to dispel the lies about Chris Bores,” he said, keeping his aim steady. “Who is that?”

Forzen, scared shitless by the collosal animal peering down at him with all the radiation of the sun, barely stammered out an answer. “Chris Bores Angry Video Game - uh - Irate Gamer!”

“What?” Gordon demanded. “I don’t know what that is. The fuck-”

“Youtube,” the soldier spat.

Beside Tommy, Coomer adjusted his grip on his weapon while he slanted Bubby a questioning look. Bubby shrugged idly as he switched out the magazine for the AR he carried.

“So you’re the last member of the military and you kidnapped his dog,” Gordon stated, snatching a glance at Tommy. “How did you know that was his dog?”

Forzen tipped his chin back to meet the swirling eyes of the animal he had placed in a corral of turrets. Tommy saw his face blanch to white as Sunkist spoke to him.

FOUL MORTAL. YOU SHALL PAY FOR YOUR MISDEEDS WITH YOUR BLOOD.

Forzen held his trembling hands up. “Listen to me.”

“Okay, I’m listening,” Gordon said. “But you’re at a loss here. You lost your advantage. I don’t know why you didn’t press the button sooner.” he paused thoughtfully before adding, “and even if you did, the dog’s immune to bullets.”

Tommy admired the restraint Gordon was showing. His own hands were itching to snap this cruel, pathetic little man out of existence, and Sunkist was beginning to drool. He couldn’t let his dog eat the soldier alive, but he could spatially launch him far, far away from them.

Forzen seemed to sense his approaching fate. “Wait, hold on!” he begged.

“What?” Gordon asked.

Tommy raised his hand, palm out. The soldier folded in on himself with a pop .

Gordon stood there, staring at the place the man had once been. He flicked a questioning look between Tommy and his dog, but Tommy kept his expression neutral. Gordon didn’t need to know what Sunkist would do to the soldier if he ever encountered him outside of this room.

“We lost ‘im,” Gordon finally said, numbly. “But hey,” he went on, “if he confirmed our suspicions, That was the last member of the US military. We are one kill away from wiping them out.”

Sunkist licked his chops. The team dismounted the crates and regrouped.

“How are we gonna handle this dog with us, though?” Bubby asked as he leapt lightly from his perch.

Gordon’s dark eyes were still a little wider than usual as he took in the beaming, two ton animal that had cramped itself in the storage room with them. “We do - we do have a - just a dog…” he uttered, at a loss. “He’s so big! What do you-” he looked to Tommy. “What breed is he, a golden retriever?”

Sure, something like that. Tommy gave his best friend a loving pat. “I made him extra big,” he allowed, smiling. “Big dogs are better.”

“I - I agree,” the man answered. “I love big dogs. But like. You ma - he’s huge!”

Sunkist blinked at Gordon. MY EXISTENCE STRETCHES FARTHER THAN YOUR MIND COULD POSSIBLY COMPREHEND, PEON.

Tommy tugged gently on the beast’s coat, drawing his attention. “Sunkist, it’s not - it’s not safe here,” he told him. “You need to go home.”

‘Go home’ meant find Dad. Sniff him out from wherever he’s hidden himself in the folds of time and space. Tommy needed answers, and he was tired of clawing around blindly for them in the dark. Get help. I need to talk to him.

Sunkist blinked again, slowly this time. AS YOU WISH. I LOVE YOU, THOMAS.

He was struck by a sudden tightness in his chest, a miniscule well of tears springing hot to his eyes. He gave Sunkist one last grateful pet, reluctant to see him leave. I love you too, buddy. You’re a good boy.

Then he flung a ‘go fetch’ gesture above his head. “Go, go!” he urged.

Sunkist bound upward, dissolving through the ceiling in a brilliant explosion of light. The science team shielded their eyes from the sunburst, and a millisecond later, the creature was gone.

Gordon dropped his arm and gaped, openmouthed, at where Sunkist had vanished. “How did you train him that?” he asked.

Tommy grinned with tearful pride. “Sunkist is the perfect dog.”

Chapter 16 <-----> Chapter 18

#ink #fanfiction #good jokes #part of my endeavor to relocate all my ao3 work #guns #violence #blood #hlvrai

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hannahmcne · 5 years

Text

Just a Dream - A MLB Oneshot

Birds were chirping, the sun was drifting through the dust lazily, and Alix was fighting to stay awake. Her dad had had to run to the Louvre early, so she'd been dropped off a full hour before school started. Armed with her backpack stuffed full of half-completed homework and a cooling cup of foul-smelling coffee, Alix trudged upstairs towards the locker room. She put her lunch, several binders, and her foul-smelling gym stuff into her locker before taking her backpack, now much lighter, upstairs.

The door was unlocked even though Mrs. Bustier still hadn't left the early morning teacher meetings she had to attend every Friday. Alix nudged the door open with her toe, shouldered a yawn, and paused mid-step as she spied the other person in the room.

In the spot where Adrien would usually sit was a girl with pink and orange streaks in her blonde hair, along with several friendship bracelets braided into the hair at the nape of her neck. Her mouth was open as she slept, and messy red eyeshadow was smudged around the corners of her eyes. She wore a band shirt that Alix did not recognize, and black ripped jeans with worn-through tennis shoes.

Alix had never seen her before.

Alix carefully scootched past her and went to set her stuff down at her desk. Then, after a moment's deliberation, she walked back down the aisle and prodded the girl's arm.

"Hey!" She called. "Time to get up, please."

"Ugh!" The girl groaned, rubbing her eyes as she woke. "Did I fall asleep in class again?" She rubbed her eyes as she looked up and squinted at the empty board. Her eyebrows suddenly knit together in confusion.

"Uh, who are you?" Alix asked as the newcomer stared at the board like they were trying to remember where they'd seen it before.

"Marilyn…?" She answered as she turned to look at Alix. Her jaw fell open as she took in Alix's bubble-gum pink hair and her unique outfit. Alix didn't think that was quite fair, seeing as what she was wearing. She crossed her arms and stared at the punk girl. Then, Marilyn said something Alix hadn't quite expected: "Alex Kubdel."

Alix blinked. "Have we met?" She asked slowly.

Marilyn blinked slowly. She looked at the board and then put her head down again. "I must still be dreaming." She yawned absentmindedly.

"Uh, no you're not?" Alex asked. The door swung open again. It was Kim, fresh from his morning sprints around the school and holding a green smoothie and a diet soda to help it go down. Marilyn sat back up when she saw him.

"Le Chien Kim." She said aloud.

"Just Kim," Kim said absentmindedly as he trooped up the stairs past Alix. Then, he paused. "Have we met?" He asked.

Marilyn stared at the both of them. Her eyes flickered from their frames to the classroom board, to the ceiling. Then, she shrugged and laid her head down on her folded arms. "Not my weirdest dream." She mumbled. "But while I'm here, you should know I totally ship you two together."

"What?" Alix asked. Kim looked abosolutely repulsed.

"Yeah." Marilyn nodded. "You and Kim should totally get together and do those weird couple yoga things and race each other around Paris. It'd be cute."

"Excuse me." Alix planted a hand down in front of Marilyn's face. "Do we even know you? Who do you think you are, to barge in and start making judgment calls on our lives?"

Marilyn sat back up, clearly annoyed that her sleep schedule is being interrupted. "Don't shoot." She drawled. "And it's not just me. Half the fandom thinks you should get together!"

The door swung open again. Marilyn turned to see who had entered, and recited: "Ivan Bruell, Mylene Haprele."

Their other two classmates stopped in surprise. Alix growled.

"You're already together and you're super cute." Marilyn giggled. "I was so excited when I saw Stoneheart for the first time! It was so cute. The way Ladybug caught Mylene while capturing that akuma was so freaking cool!"

Ivan furrorwed his brow at her. "How do you know about that?" He asked.

"Well, the episode was kind of made of close-ups. It was super awesome. If you ask me, they shouldn't have done the red and black spotted backsplash for when Alya got trapped behind the car though." Marilyn shrugged.

"Trapped behind a car?" Alix asked.

"Black and red spots?" Mylene tilted her head in confusion.

"Yeah. Animator decision though. Can I go back to sleep?" Marilyn yawned and put her head on top of a fist.

"Uh, no, you can't." Alix rolled her eyes. "You can't just appear in our classroom, say all these weird things, and go to sleep when we want to ask you stuff about it. So, sit up." She grabbed the back of Marilyn's shirt and hoisted the girl into an upright position as Mylene, Ivan, and Kim gathered around her.

"Sheesh!" Marilyn complained. "Why are you so touchy? My dreams aren't usually like this."

Alix reached out and grabbed the fleshy part of Marilyn's arm. She pinched, hard. Marilyn yelped.

"See?" Alix asked, frustrated. "We're not a dream. Now pay attention."

Marilyn blinked and looked down and where a red mark was starting to form on her arm. She took her skin in between her fingers and pinched herself. Nothing happened. "Oh my gosh," Marilyn said loudly as her eyes began to grow wide. "Oh my gosh!"

"What?" Alix asked irritably.

"I've been transported to the miraculous ladybug realm?" Marilyn shrieked. "Oh gosh, this is what I get for staying up late finishing my stupid math homework! I'm sorry, karma!"

"What's she going on about?" Kim asked the other three classmates as Marilyn seized her own hair and began to pull. They shrugged.

The door to the classroom opened again. A noise was beginning to come from the courtyard below. Students were starting to arrive. Marilyn spun as more people entered the room. "Rose Lavillant, Juleka Couffaine, Max Kante, and Nathaniel Kurtzburg!" Marilyn counted off on her fingers. "That means I'm in a room with Timebreaker, Dark Cupid, Horrificator, Stoneheart, Princess Fragrance, Refleckta, Gamer, and Evillustrator! That's like, a third of season one?"

"Season one?" Mylene asked hesitantly.

Marilyn jumped up and ran to the board. "You guys are part of my favorite TV Show, Miraculous Ladybug! The first episode of season three just barely came out and – ugh!" She paused with a long white piece of chalk in her hands as she shook her tiny fists. "I hate Lila so much!" She shrieked before she began to scribble three lists on the board.

"Lila's such a good and interesting person, though!" Rose said. She looked as confused as the rest of them but still had to stand up for her friend. "She's a personal friend of Prince Ali's!"

"Not really." Marilyn paused in her list writing to turn around and face Rose. "She really is a stupid, stupid liar, and I hate her guts."

"What are you doing?" Kim asked.

On the board were, as previously mentioned, three long lists. The last one had only one word: Chameleon. The others had twenty-six with a 'Christmas Special' in between. Alix recognized many of the names right off the bat. Timebreaker, of course, had been her akumatized identity. In fact, it seemed like Marilyn was listing akumas. Some of the ones she was talking about Alix didn't even recognize. Who was Copycat, or The Collector?

"I've seen every episode," Marilyn announced proudly. "That's about 700 minutes of watch time between all released episodes, not including the webisodes or the chibi episodes, which are so cute!" Marilyn paused to squeal as she began to circle certain villains on her lists. "I've watched episodes in French, German, Spanish, but mostly English. I've transcribed articles for MLB Wikia, and I make fan theories, and I can't draw super well but I love the fanart in this fandom. It's so pretty!" She finished circling and proudly presented her work to the stunned kids in the room. "These are by far the best episodes. Like this one, Style Queen, we learn what happened to Adrien's mom, and it's so sad!"

"What did I just walk into?" Someone asked from the doorway. It was Chloe, with her white designer purse slung over her shoulder and Sabrina by her side. Everyone rolled their eyes as she strolled inside. She examined the board tactfully. "You're missing akumas if that's what you're trying to do. Vanisher, for one." She flipped her hand at Sabrina, who looked delighted to have been awknowledged.

"No, I'm listing episodes," Marilyn said as if it were obvious. She sized up the two new girls. "Sabrina Raincomprix. Your dad is the police officer who needs to learn to cool his jets." Before Sabrina could defend her dad, Marilyn squinted at Chloe. "Ugh." She said. "I hated you back in season one for what you did to Kim, but I guess you do get a small redemption for what happened during the Queen's fight episodes and for shaming Hawkmoth on his fashion." Marilyn snorted and began to laugh.

"Episodes?" Sabrina asked softly.

Alix rolled her eyes. "She thinks she's asleep and we're all from a TV Show she watches when she's awake."

"You are!" Marilyn insisted. "I have clips and articles and fanarts on my phone to prove it!" She reached into her pocket and pulled out a sleek phone with a large screen. When she showed the screen to their classmates, they fell silent. Then, after a long pause, Nathaniel asked: "Is that supposed to be Marinette and Adrien?"

"Yes." Marilyn blushed with pride. "Aren't they adorable? They're my OTP."

"Marinette Dupain-Cheng?" Chloe asked in disgust.

"Yes." Marilyn squealed. "Did you know her name was almost Bridgette when they first started animating her? And her love interest was originally Felix, but Felix didn't have much opportunity for character development, so they let him go and made Adrien, our sinammon roll son, instead?"

Someone made a squeaking sound from the door. Everyone turned to see Alya and Nino standing in the doorway, looking extremely surprised and confused.

"I'm sorry." Nino coughed as he tried to talk around clearing his throat. "Did you just call my dude a cinnamon roll?"

"With an 's'," Marilyn confirmed. "If you ask me, I think Chat is way hotter than Adrien. He's just so much more… free and happy. Sure of himself."

No one was quite sure of what to say.

Marilyn looked around the room in amazement. "Woah." She said. "This is amazing. This has to be a dream. There's no way this can actually be happening. I mean, all we're missing is-"

"Hey, guys, what's going on?" Adrien asked as he walked into class behind Nino and Alya. Marilyn's jaw dropped and unhinged as she stared with wide eyes at him. "Oh, new student?" He asked uneasily.

"Oh my gosh!" Marilyn jumped off the desk and sprinted to him. "I have so many things I want to tell you and – holy crap, I can't believe it's you!" She screamed.

Adrien looked extremely uncomfortable as he awkwardly set his backpack down and pushed it under his desk with his foot.

"Where's my phone?" Marilyn panicked. "I have to show all of you guys my favorite Ladynoir fanart!"

"Ladynoir?" Alya perked up. Nino groaned.

"No." He complained. "Don't start her up on this. They're not a couple."

"I know!" Marilyn growled in frustration. "Isn't it so frustrating? I mean, if they would reveal themselves already, we could all go home and have a lovely rest of our lives, but no! They have to work the stupid love square into every minute of this show and –" She suddenly whirled on Adrien, "If I hear you call Ladybug 'a very good friend' one more time, I'm going to freak out."

"I haven't!" Adrien protested feebly.

"Back up." Alix sighed. "What's Ladynoir?"

"The ship name for Ladybug and Chat Noir." Alya supplied.

"There's also Adrienette, Marichat, and Ladrien. My personal favorite is Ladynoir. Power couple all the way!" Marilyn pumped her fist in the air.

Alix knew she could be a little slow on the uptake sometimes. Sometimes she had to be retaught things from math and her French teacher had to go a bit slower for her, but if she was counting correctly then that meant…

"Are you talking about Marinette?" Alya asked with a face. "Because, uh, she's smitten, and not with Chat Noir."

Adrien blinked and looked around. "Can someone explain what's going on?

"She thinks we're all from her favorite TV Show that apparently centers around a love square between you, Marinette, Chat Noir, and Ladybug while they fight akumas." Max supplied.

"Wait, what?" Marilyn asked.

Adrien looked equally taken aback. "But… I'm not into Marinette. Or Chat Noir for that matter."

"Of course you are!" Marilyn groaned. She looked like she was going to have an anesrum. "You're the secondary character and the love interest and everything depends on you!" She paused. "Actually, scratch that, basically every single problem in the entire series would be solved if Chloe learned to be nice, Lila quit lyin'-" Adrien stiffened at that remark, "-And if Gabriel and Natalie got together."

Adrien began to choke. "What?" He asked. "Excuse me?"

"No, but hear me out!" Marilyn exclaimed. "If Gabriel and Natalie got together, then Hawkmoth wouldn't have a reason to send out any more akumas, and Ladybug and Chat Noir could reveal their identities," She gave a not-so-subtle glare at Adrien, "And the love square would be resolved and everything would be fine!" She threw her hands up in the air along with her cell phone. Everyone watched it turn flips through the air until it hit the wall and remained still beside the door.

Mylene raised her hand. "I still don't see how Hawkmoth plays into that." She said. "Is Hawkmoth trying to, like, get Gabriel and Natalie together?"

Marilyn snorted. "If only our problems were that easy." She rolled her eyes. "Anyways, if Chloe were nicer people wouldn't get akumatized as much because as of right now she's caused fifteen akumas, not counting her own akumatizations. Most of those were in Season One, so she's gotten better, but still. Marinette's caused eleven, however, I count Zombiezou as one both Marinette and Chloe caused because Chloe caused the situation, but it was Marinette's anger that drew the Akuma in the first place." She paused to take a deep breath as everyone stared.

Finally, Rose piped up from the back. "And, uhm, what about Lila lying?"

"Oh, she's a nasty rotten liar who I've never heard spout a single truth since she was akumatized in Volpina. She's an absolute brat." Marinlynn answered with an eyeroll as she leaned back against Mrs. Bustier's desk.

"I am not!" Someone shouted from the doorway. It was Lila. Her face was turning red and her fists were clenched and shaking. "I've never told a single lie!" She said, crossing her arms over her chests.

"Oh, like when you stole Adrien's book about superheroes, got a fox miraculous knockoff and dropped his book in the trash, causing him to get grounded for life?" Marilynn asked with a raised eyebrow. "I'm quite sorry no one took you up on your sprained wrist lie, considered you switched up what hand it was at the end of the day."

The room fell deathly silent. Lila's face was becoming multichromatic as she shook with rage. Marilynn licked the tip of her finger, pointed at Lila, and made a sizzling sound with her teeth. Then, she turned to the class. "You all should probably know she's actively and willingly worked with Hawkmoth before. To the point when she was angry at Marinette and Adrien she literally took an akuma she found that was supposed to be for Marinette and put it in her own earring. The entire fandom hates her guts and we make memes all the time about how the fox says nothing but lies."

"This is unbelievable." Adrien shook his head. "The book was returned miraculously and I was ungrounded. Dad never even said anything to me about it. And how can you expect us to believe all of this? It's honestly… far fetched."

Marilyn began to laugh. She laughed so hard she doubled over onto her knees and then knelt on the ground laughing. Finally, she looked up with tears in her eyes. "Marinette Dupain-Cheng returned the book for you. But not before she showed it to Master Fu and he took three-million photos of it."

"Master… Fu?" Adrien stumbled, eyes wide.

"Mhmm!" Marilynn nodded. She crossed her legs criss-cross applesauce underneath her and smiled. "The Collector was a really interesting episode. We found out the identity of Hawkmoth."

The entire class did a double intake. "You know who Hawkmoth is?" Alya gasped. She reached for her phone, but Nino pulled it out of her pocket and held it under his arm so she couldn't wrench it back.

"I know everyone's identities." Marilyn's eyes sparkled. "Even Ladybug and Chat Noir." Everyone was silent; no one believed her.

Marilyn stood back up and wandered back to the board. The class parted as she went. She picked up the chalk and examined the list in season two. "Queen Bee first transformed in the Episode Queen Wasp." She recited as she made a large arrow pointing to the episode in question, which was already circled for importance, and wrote 'Chloe Bourgeois' beside it. "And Carapace transformed in Anansi." Marilyn shivered as she made another arrow. "I hate spiders." She murmured as she wrote 'Nino Lahiffe' beside the episode.

No one said anything.

"Rena Rouge first transformed in Sapotis." Marilyn continued as she drew a third arrow and wrote 'Alya Cesaire' next to the episode title.

"Wait," Alex said. "Do you mean… Alya and Nino are superheroes?"

Adrien looked very surprised. He stared at Nino as his best friend rubbed the back of his neck. "You were Carapace?" He asked.

"Yeah, sorry man." Nino shrugged. "I wasn't really supposed to tell anyone, even you."

Marilyn snorted, and leaned her head against the chalkboard.

"What?" Adrien asked her.

"Nothing." Marilyn shook her head. "Just… Irony." She made an arrow pointing to the Collector and then paused. She turned around to stare at Adrien, and the corners of her mouth twitched downwards in sympathy. Then she turned back to the board and scrawled 'Gabriel Agreste' beside the episode.

Adrien lurched backward as if he'd been shot. "No!" He exclaimed. "He was an akuma. He was The Collector! He can't be Hawkmoth."

"He akumatized himself," Marilyn answered, stepping back from the board and tossing the chalk in her hand. "He knew you were hot on his trail when he discovered the book was gone, so he akumatized himself. Natalie knew. She's in love with him though, so she keeps silent about the whole thing."

Adrien fell back against his desk with a thump. Marilyn examined her writing. "Ladybug and Chat Noir appear in every episode, of course." She announced to the room. "They're the love square, the main event. Watching them flail around each other is honestly why the show is so popular."

Max blinked and looked sideways at the board. "Ladybug and Chat Noir are the Love Square?" He asked.

"Yes." Marilyn nodded.

"And how many akumas has Marinette caused?" Max asked.

"A lot." Marilyn chuckled. "She did Gamer, Antibug, and Volpina in season one."

"No, she didn't." Chloe and Lila said at the exact same time. They looked at each other in surprise, and then Chloe turned back to Marilyn. "Ladybug did." She said. "I was akumatized when she called me a liar to Chat Noir."

"And I was akumtised when Ladybug came out of nowhere and yelled at me!" Lila exclaimed. Marilyn snorted.

"Yeah, Marinette isn't perfect, but she always does her best. Adrien didn't even apologize for akumatising Copycat." Marilyn gave Adrien a quick glare.

"Copycat?" Alya asked. "Wasn't that when Chat Noir stole the Mona Lisa?"

"Theo Barbot." Marilyn recited. "He sculpted the statue of Ladybug and Chat Noir. When Ladybug didn't show because she was busy stealing Adrien's phone, Chat Noir took the opportunity to tell Theo that he and Ladybug were dating. Theo was akumatized and Adrien never even apologized."

Silence filled the room. Adrien dragged his sweat-covered hands up and down his pants legs. He was still reeling over his dad being Hawkmoth. Marilyn laughed. "You don't all have to look at me like that. Marinette has stolen, like, three people's phones."

"Why would Adrien have to apologize for Chat Noir?" Chloe asked quietly.

Marilyn blinked. "Oh, you're still puzzling on that? You're a little slow on the uptake. Adrien's alter-ego is Chat Noir. With the black cat ring and his kwami Plagg he can transform into the cat-themed superhero."

"Stop," Nino whispered. He looked like he was in pain.

"Wait, wait wait!" Max waved his hands about. "Going back to that love-square-thingy you mentioned with the Ladynoir and Marilap-"

"Marichat!" Marilyn corrected with a glare.

"That would mean that Adrien takes up a place in all those points as either Adrien or Chat Noir and if I'm to interpret your claims of Marinette akumatising Lila and Chloe correctly, then that means that Marinette would also take up a place on each pairing of the square because Marinette would be-"

The door flew open with a bang and a girl with a red face and a pink purse skidded into the room. "Not late!" She yelled triumphantly, crashing into Alya as Marilyn's eyes grew wide.

"Oh no," Nino whispered softly into his hand.

Marilyn opened her mouth as wide as she could and screamed: "LADYBUG!"

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mariaclaragomez276 · 4 years

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20 of the world’s most stylish dog-friendly hotels

The year of the pandemic has also been the year of puppy love, with more of us turning to our furry friends for comfort than perhaps ever before. Where would we be without our four-legged companions during lockdown (and life in general) to break up our working-from-home days with cuddles, chasing tails, and a much needed breath of fresh air on a lunch break outing.

If your daily ‘walkies’ are starting to feel a bit too familiar, why not swap the local park for one of these canine chic boutique hotels, where pups can expect to be pampered as much as any other guest. From doggy afternoon tea, V.I.Pooch packages, personalised bedding and dedicated dog room service menus, these paw-fect places are the pick of the luxury litter. Because your dog deserves a holiday as much as you do…

The Farncombe Estate, Cotswolds – UK

An eclectic village-style assortment of houses, huts and hideaways set within the picturesque grounds of the Farncombe Estate, The Fish Hotel barks up all the right trees (and treehouses). Welcoming medium sized, well behaved pooches to their cosy selection of dog-friendly rooms, which are located on the hillside and spread throughout various individual buildings in the grounds. Be sure to book one of the Medium Rooms, Veranda Rooms, Small Suites, and Big Suites if you’re planning to bring your pup along, or one of the magical treetop cabin-style suites complete with underfloor heating, wrap-around decking with heated tubs, and woodland views. These rooms have wooden floors and easy access to your car along with 400 acres of Cotswold countryside on your doorstep for those all-important dog walks. Every doggy desire has been catered for throughout the estate, including dog hydration stations, a ‘dunk your dog’ bath tub (with canine shampoo and conditioner), a dedicated dog agility course, and doggy afternoon tea – luxury tit-bits from the likes of Woof & Brew and The Barking Bakery feature on the menu.

A stick’s throw from The Fish is the honey-hued Dormy House, which also welcomes dogs in their Danish Court rooms, including Rose Cottage, Courtyard Suites, and Comfy Rooms, all a short walk from the main farmhouse.

Paws for thought: A charge of £30 per dog per stay applies and includes a cosy dog bed in the room, two dog bowls, some lovely doggie treats, and a dog towel. You are welcome to relax in the bar and lounge with your pooch and you can dine from the bar menu, but note that dogs should not be taken into the main restaurant at The Fish. Dogs are welcome to dine with their owners in The Potting Shed at Dormy House.

Ovolo Hotels, Sydney & Brisbane – Australia & Hong Kong

A colourful collection of contemporary boutique hotels in Australia and Hong Kong, Ovolo Hotels offer an indulgent V.I.Pooch package at Ovolo The Valley Brisbane, Ovolo Woolloomooloo in Sydney, and Ovolo Central Hong Kong. Wake up in one of the trendy, art-filled suites and roll over to your furry friend, who will be provided with their own doggy bed, food and water bowls, and a doggy bag with especially designed toys and treats. With dog-friendly staff on hand to help with late-night walkies (because dogs can feel jet-lagged too!) and recommend local dog-friendly dinner spots, you and your pooch will be made to feel instantly at home with Ovolo Hotels.

The Plymouth South Beach, Miami – USA

Top left image credit: @wtfrenchie

This four-storey luxury hotel is a peach-and-cream Art Deco icon with a contemporary twist, where you’ll never have to leave your best friend behind. Spend days beneath a pastel parasol by the pool or private beach at The Plymouth South Beach with an expertly-crafted cocktail in hand, and your pooch by your side – with personalised Plymouth doggy bowls included in every canine booking. Watch the famous South Beach sunrises as you snuggle up to your pup, before enjoying one of the hotel’s doggy brunches and a sun-soaked walk in the Miami Beach Botanical Gardens or the Collins Park, located just around the corner from this Art Moderne masterpiece.

Kristiania Lech, Lech am Arlberg – Austria

An exquisitely decorated Alpine retreat with the feel of a private residence rather than a hotel, Kristiania Lech is just a short walk from the centre of the upmarket ski resort of Lech. Dogs are welcome to stay in every single one of the 29 rooms and suites at Kristiania Lech, so both you and your canine companion can enjoy the original pieces of artwork and spectacular views over the pretty village of Lech and towards the Alps. Warm up with some cuddles after a day on the slopes on the hotel’s sun terrace or Kaminzimmer (fireplace), or ask the resident leisure consultant for the best Alpine walks if you’re looking for more mountain air – the hotel would be more than happy to arrange a picnic in the snow for you and your pup.

Paws for thought: A charge of €45 per dog per day applies – well-behaved dogs are allowed everywhere except the restaurant.

Château La Chenèviere Hotel, Normandy – France

An elegant 18th-century château surrounded by attractive gardens and parkland, Château La Chenevière Hotel combines the feel of an English country house with classical French style. Claiming the Country House Hotel of the Year title at the SLH Awards 2020, every pastel tinted room has a garden view, making it the perfect place to enjoy the countryside charm of Normandy with your chien in tow. Explore the 12 acres of parkland with your pooch, with secluded walled gardens and a heated outdoor swimming pool (which is open from May-September). Or venture outside the hotel on one of the hotel’s bicycles (if your pup is basket-sized!) for a day trip to Omaha Beach or historic Bayeux.

Forestis, the Dolomites – Italy

The South Tyrolean mountainscape is a playground for pups and nature lovers alike, with endless forest trails and snow-dusted scenery surrounding Forestis – a summit-level sanctuary in the UNESCO Dolomites. You and your pooch will be greeted by resident chocolate Labrador, Amadeus, who can show you all the dog-friendly places to rest your paws. Make the most of the surrounding greenery in the summer, and pick up some snowshoes in the colder months to trek through the high altitude wilderness. This is a boutique escape designed to help you switch off and immerse yourself in the regenerative power of nature.

The Nare, Cornwall – UK

Flanked by colourful gardens and overlooking the gentle waves of Gerrans Bay, The Nare has all the exclusivity of a dog-friendly private island. The Nare’s beachside position puts Cornwall’s captivating coast at your feet, and with the newly-kitted out country house boot room courtesy of partners The Original Muckboot Company, guests can borrow a pair of comfortable wellies for strolls along the sandy beach or coastal footpaths. Well-behaved dogs are welcome in all the rooms and gardens at The Nare, with dinner from the dogs’ table d’hôte menu included in the daily dog charge.

Paws for thought: As with all guests at The Nare those with special dietary requirements and desires are well looked after. The dogs’ à la carte menu has a wider choice. Outdoorsy types and working dogs that don’t need to come into the hotel may prefer instead to stay in the working dogs’ kennels on self-catering terms, for which there is no charge.

The Sukhothai Bangkok – Thailand

Experience serenity and relaxation in the heart of the city at The Sukhothai Bangkok. Take your pooch for a stroll in the carefully landscaped hotel gardens, before enjoying a dip in the 25-metre infinity pool. Rooms blend traditional details with contemporary flair – you’ll be cocooned by polished teak and the Thai silks, with large flat-screen TVs and Bose audio systems for a modern interlude.

Paws for thought: A charge of 500 TBH per dog is applied to each stay, and dogs must be kept on a leash at all times when on hotel property (except in your room).

The Adelphi Hotel, Saratoga Springs – USA

When you first walk through the impressive entrance of The Adelphi Hotel, it’s easy to cast yourself back to the old world grace and grandeur of the 19th-century New York social set. Welcoming pets of all sizes for a one time fee of $75, dogs are allowed practically everywhere in The Adelphi – from all guest rooms, the lobby, all common areas to all three of the hotel restaurant patios overlooking Broadway. With especially designed canine amenities, including cosy beds, food and water bowls, leashes and collars, The Adelphi keeps its four-legged family front of mind.

Hotel Lilla Roberts, Helsinki – Finland

With its location and elegant, homely atmosphere, Hotel Lilla Roberts puts you and your pup in prime position for a luxury Helsinki holiday. While away an afternoon in the Art Deco lounge cosied up beside a crackling fire, or ask the hotel staff to point you in the right direction for the best local parks to play fetch, Finnish style – and with over 80 dog-friendly parks and dedicated doggy beaches to choose from, this Scandi city is the paw-fect choice for pooch parents.

Hotel Tannenhof, St. Anton am Arlberg – Austria

Close to pristine, powdery slopes and a picturesque village with traditional Tyrolean lodges and stone farmhouses, historic church and cosy restaurants, Hotel Tannenhof is set within a true winter wonderland. You and your pup will be given a warm welcome by resident black Labradors Emma and Tommy, before settling in to one of just seven elegant, wood-panelled suites. Cuddle up on the hotel’s custom-made beds, or have a post-ski snooze beside one of the open fireplaces.

Hôtel Crillon le Brave, Provence – France

Left image credit: @victoria_steiner

A quintessentially French bolthole that fuses the charms of a 17th-century hamlet with contemporary luxury, Hôtel Crillon le Brave is simply Provençal perfection. The hotel’s nine stone houses possess all the charm of French countryside living, with terracotta tiles, colourful throws and handpicked antique furniture. If you can bring yourself to leave this hilltop hideaway, take a tour of the nearby vineyards and wineries or wander the fragrant lavender fields of Sault.

Paws for thought: Be sure to book one of the Prestige Rooms if you’re planning to travel with your pooch, as pet-friendly rooms must be requested in advance. Small dogs (weighing under 10kg) are welcome to stay at Hôtel Crillon le Brave for a charge of €30 per night.

The Nimb, Copenhagen – Denmark

A Moorish-styled palace with a striking Venetian marble façade, all rooms but one at The Nimb have a log fire and view of the Tivoli Gardens. Dogs are welcomed with a hamper of goodies, including toys, turndown treats, luxury bedding, food and water bowls, and a ‘Do Not Disturb/Dog Sleeping’ card. A whole team of doggy dedicated staff are on hand at The Nimb, from dog sitters and walkers, to groomers and a veterinary service, your four-legged friends will hardly need to lift a paw.

Paws for thought: Dogs are not allowed in Tivoli Gardens (except for the annual Dog’s Day in June). Dogs are also not allowed in The Nimb’s restaurants, so be sure to request a pet sitter at least 24 hours in advance.

Hacienda Zorita Wine Hotel & Organic Farm, Salamanca – Spain

A former monastery overlooking the River Tormes, Hacienda Zorita Wine Hotel & Organic Farm is a magnificent wine resort with an impressive history that dates back to the 14th century. Look out for the working sheep dogs on the nearby farm, just a 10-minute trip from Hacienda Zorita where guests can enjoy cheese tasting and an authentic countryside meal experience. Therre are plenty of vineyard walks to enjoy with your canine companion, before indulging in some of Hacienda Zorita’s specialities, including extra virgin olive oil, local cheese and pata negra produced on the estate.

Ashdown Park Hotel & Country Club, East Sussex – UK

A listed 19th-century mansion set in 186 acres of landscaped parkland, Ashdown Park Hotel & Country Club puts the natural beauty of Ashdown Forest at your feet. Book one of the dog-friendly Fairway Junior Suites, with French doors that open directly out onto the parkland, complete with a private terrace and outdoor furniture. Four-legged guests at Ashdown Park can expect the royal treatment, with their own dog basket, blanket and bowls provided along with dinner and a goodie bag from Arden Grange, a family-run business that has been developing superior, premium food for animals since 1996. Be sure to ask the concierge for a map of nearby dog walking trails, along with their recommendations for dog-friendly pubs in the area.

Paws for thought: A supplementary charge of £30 per dog, per room, will be charged in addition to the room rates. Dogs are regrettably not permitted in the Main House.

Villa La Madonna, Piedmont – Italy

Verdant hills, vineyards, and terracotta roofs – Villa La Madonna overlooks the Bormida Valley in Piedmont, north-western Italy where guests are guaranteed to get a taste for rural life. Run by Swedish couple Helen and Mikael (with their adorable dog Stella), your pup will keep good canine company at Villa La Madonna, which is also the seasonal home to some truffle hunting hounds in the autumn months. If you can tear yourself away, the Alps are only two hours to the north, and the Italian Riviera one hour to the south – with plenty of picturesque walks for you and your cane to enjoy.

Crossbasket Castle, High Blantyre – Scotland

Steeped in history, Crossbasket Castle is a landmark Scottish retreat. Michelin-star chef Albert Roux has created a special menu for man’s best friend, featuring a a selection of salmon, mackerel, spinach and brown rice risotto, turkey and sweet potato stew and meatloaf with chicken jelly. Each item on the ‘dog’s dinner’ costs £10.50 and is available to order via room service, so you can treat yourself to a cosy night in. If you need to walk off all the night’s indulgence, the castle grounds include a large woodland area, extensive nature walks and a beautiful stretch of river with majestic waterfalls.

We have plenty more paw-fect places to choose from, just look out for our pet-friendly icon under the key features of our hotel pages!

The post 20 of the world’s most stylish dog-friendly hotels appeared first on Small Luxury Hotels.

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fathersonholygore · 7 years

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Blue Velvet. 1986. Directed & Written by David Lynch. Starring Isabella Rossellini, Kyle MacLachlan, Dennis Hopper, Laura Dern, Hope Lange, Dean Stockwell, George Dickerson, Priscilla Pointer, Frances Bay, Brad Dourif, & Jack Nance. De Laurentiis Entertainment Group (DEG) Rated R. 120 minutes. Drama/Mystery/Thriller

★★★★★ David Lynch is one of my favourite filmmakers, his directing and writing equally fantastic. My dad told me about Twin Peaks when I was young (it was on TV when I was about five years old), so in my teenage years I discovered its magic. This lead to seeing Eraserhead with a few friends in a dim lit basement, which blew my mind. On and on through Lynch’s catalogue of work I went, eventually watching his early short films opening up a whole other door into his mind as an artist. Blue Velvet is a surreal film. Not as steeped in it as much as his other work, though full of surrealism nonetheless. It’s through the absurd Lynch taps into this element, alongside his modern noir-ish plot that digs deep into the underbelly of idyllic American life. What makes the movie so exciting is the dangerous story, looking at this darker side of suburbia in a small logging town, fittingly named Lumberton. Lynch has said this film inspired Twin Peaks; the way in which he blends the darkness with the absurdism is strangely compelling. There’s an explicit scene or two, depravity taking the reins in violent fashion. Mostly, Blue Velvet takes place in a space where violence is always possible, never far; its threat is debilitating to the progression of everything from innocence to love. The central character Jeffrey Beaumont (Kyle MacLachlan) finds himself pitted against the psychotic, Freudian villain Frank Booth (Dennis Hopper), faced with either accepting his role in a hierarchy of violent men or rejecting the male violence which underpins the light and goodness of Lumberton. The now iconic opening of the film is perfect, designed like the meticulous opening sentence of a piece of great literature. Lynch starts with those typical images of American life, things he remembers from the 1950s: white picket fence, bright red firetruck with waving firemen followed by the bright red roses of a luscious garden, the beautiful houses like boxes in a row. He immediately smashes the gorgeous, American Dream-type feeling with Mr. Beaumont, Jeffrey’s father, having a stroke while watering the garden. As if innocence is starting to shatter with it, a child in a diaper wanders up while the man seizes on the lawn. The hose spurts water, and Lynch goes into a slow motion shot, the sound likewise slowed – the dog snaps at the water’s stream, his face looking vicious and snarling, his sounds become sinister. What a perfectly thematic opener. I honestly don’t know how this could’ve been improved; because it couldn’t. This first sequence is a thesis for Blue Velvet, ending in its statement where we zoom in and the camera takes us into the grass, into the dirt, right to the insects crawling in the earth. An image that sticks with us, coming up again in the end. But it effectively shows us what Lynch is doing, and plans to do throughout the plot – put a microscope over the lives of those in a quaint town. In this story, that involves a young man under threat of violence invading his life, maybe even his very soul. “It‘s a strange world, isn‘t it?” Jeffrey’s dropped into a Freudian nightmare of a world, perhaps one to which Oedipus could relate; in a symbolic sense, anyways. He is lured into the dark side of his town by a sliced off ear, yet more importantly the story begins with his father’s brutal stroke. He loses the male influence in his life, falling prey to corruption. Frank’s arrival is surreal in itself. He switches between two personas – Daddy and Baby. He treats Dorothy Vallens (Isabella Rossellini) as Mother. At the sight of her vagina, and with a gas mask dose of amyl nitrite, he goes from Daddy to Baby, then back again. Likewise, after there’s a change in Jeffrey. Without his actual father around he adopts Frank, albeit subconsciously (perfect for a Freudian analysis), as Daddy. And where his family didn’t introduce him to the darker side of Lumberton, Dorothy and Frank become his surrogate parents, leading him down the garden path to the truth; no matter how disturbing. This is quickly evident when he leaves Dorothy’s apartment following the first time we meet Frank in his erotic rage. We’re whisked directly to a dream sequence of Jeffrey remembering the events, then he wakes and there’s a strange moment where he seems relieved, touching the wall near a figure: the figure may be, to him, something else entirely but it looks like a vagina dentata sort of image. The influence of Daddy is transforming Jeffrey’s image of women into something dangerous; tying into one of the film’s themes being his journey, as a young man, trying to reject the violence of the male gender through the lens of how his surrogate Daddy treats the surrogate Mother.

Jeffrey walks to and from the hospital during the day and everything is bright, beautiful, positive. In the evening this changes, suddenly even the normal things don’t feel right. For instance, a moment many never catch when the first night scene sees Jeffrey out for a walk in his neighbourhood: a man stands in the grass as his dog on a leash stands on the sidewalk, a reverse of what you’d see like he’s being walked, you almost expect him to squat, drop a coil. One early indication of the surrealism Lynch employs. Part of the surrealism is that idea of the twisted, half-Freudian and half-Oedipal journey on which Jeffrey goes. Because not only does the story dive into the underbelly of Lumberton, the story itself dives into the subconscious mind. This is best represented in the shot from Lynch after Jeffrey’s discovery of the ear – the camera closes in, further and further, right into the ear canal; figuratively, and literally because the orifice is an ear, into the mind. So, our trusty director dips us into that subconscious, in every way. Once you begin peeling back the layers they shed like skin. The other surreal moments, the best, involve Frank most of all. First, there’s his amyl nitrite through the gas mask. On the surface that’s absurd alone, but coupled with the whole Daddy idea, you see that Jeffrey’s father has to breathe through a tube while Frank uses the surgical gas mask to inhale his drugs; a weird double image. The doubling continues, too. Frank is captivated with music, in particular the song “Blue Velvet” by Bobby Vinton and Roy Orbison’s “In Dreams” – the doubles return here, with Dorothy singing Vinton, suave Ben (Dean Stockwell) singing Orbison. And Stockwell’s little performance is so unnervingly odd. Strangely enough, the scene that weirds me out most. We see him singing, holding an electrical cord lamp lighting his face, and Frank stares at him, mouthing Orbison’s words, almost in a trance. An addition to the psychosis of Frank, suggesting something behind his fixation that we don’t need to know to find terrifying.

The violence is likely the most surreal of all: the Man in Yellow is dead on his feet, in literal fashion; Lynch shows us a close-up of Dorothy’s chipped tooth in her red lipstick-ed mouth then a little later Frank paints Jeffrey with lipstick and slaps him around, too; Frank’s crew stands by watching in complacence as he commits various unpredictable acts in a violent rage. Just as surreal as the absurdist situations in which Jeffrey finds himself throughout the film, from finding an ear in a field (the ants call to mind an image from 1929’s silent short film Un Chien Andalou) to witnessing the ritualistic sexual assault by Frank on Dorothy. One of the reasons Lynch’s film acts as an excellent piece of visual literature is how he ties off the imagery. Whereas in the first couple scenes we go into the dead ear’s canal, the camera takes us back out of the ear later, except it’s Jeffrey’s ear, alive and in the sun; a transformative journey, from darkness into the light (a visual motif we see in the use of light Lynch employs in many scenes). In addition, the rightful Mother and Daddy are restored once Frank is dead; Mr. Beaumont is recovering well, the sun is shining, the backyards of suburbia are back to their dreamy quality again. Finally, while the darkness still exists – the robins feed on the bugs, the extent of Frank’s connections and the bad people in Lumberton remain unknown – a lightness is restored. These elements help Lynch suture together his masterpiece of neo-noir surrealism. One of the greatest films made in the 20th century, a work of dangerous art. Lynch’s BLUE VELVET is Like Disturbing(ly Good) Literature Blue Velvet. 1986. Directed & Written by David Lynch. Starring Isabella Rossellini, Kyle MacLachlan, Dennis Hopper, Laura Dern, Hope Lange, Dean Stockwell, George Dickerson, Priscilla Pointer, Frances Bay, Brad Dourif, & Jack Nance.

#Absurd #Blue Velvet #David Lynch #Dennis Hopper #Isabella Rossellini #Kyle MacLachlan #Laura Dern #Male Violence #Mommy Issues #Surrealism

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