#sure did save these receipts

[bawdybean]

I saw you mention in the comments that you were also banned from the 30+ Fanfic Discord Server without warning or explanation. Would you be willing to share your story?

Sure why not. So I joined the server because I had several friends on there who were enjoying it, and then once I was there, a bunch MORE friends joined. It was nice for a bit, but I noticed quite quickly that there was one mod (Adela) who was... a bit aggressive. A hair trigger for correcting others but often did not follow the rules themselves- and that bothered me a lot due to previous fandom experience.

As an example, I invited a friend, and then left quite quickly because within a single day, Adela had come at them over their opinion on the ability of someone to write from a perspective they don't have (such as writing across genders etc). The mod apologized eventually and said they were very touchy about it because of a friend. Oookay. The flags were there but I chose to keep giving it a try. It is supposed to be a server full of adults (30+ is the whole point) and we were encouraged to act like adults- in the rules. But in practice, any phrase that any member or mod could interpret wrong was worthy of the mods reminding us not to do X Y o r Z because it might be offensive to someone. When I spoke up and asked that also maybe everyone could assume good intent as well? I was shushed and talked down to. I always felt that the mods were trying to "parent" the server. Adela in particular. One mod would tell me one thing and then Adela would come in HOURS later to correct both me and that mod.

Finally fed up with this I messaged the Server Owner Maryberry. I explained that I felt Adela was targeting some members of the server, and that I felt treated like a child, that ill intent was assumed in members actions first, but that Adela herself often did the things she corrected of others, even though they were not within the rules. I further explained that I had had a previous bad experience with a mod in a large server where I was a mod and that Adela bore a striking resemblance in behaviors. So in fairness part of it was me being set off by that. I asked if I was allowed to block a mod, because this is not explicitly stated in the rules but is the advice we/I would have given in much larger servers in case of a mod/member conflict. I also edxplained that several others had complained to me about Adela's behavior, including getting a DM from a server member I did not know, saying Adela was just like this and that Adela had treated her that way too, and she just wanted me to know I wasn't alone. I blacked out the persons name and passed that message along to Maryberry as well, naively thinking that perhaps they were too close to the situation and just not aware that they had a mod making a LOT of people uncomfortable. Maryberry asked if theycould tell Adela I had a problem with her, and i requested she not as I did not see how that would help in any way. They then requested time to think over if I should be allowed to block a mod. They decided I could, but that I would be at risk of missing messages that were important. I pointed out that I had a partner in the server who would relay those if needed, and that there was rarely if ever only a single mod on and proceeded to block Adella. Who continued to ping me with replies, respond to my comments (at times aggressively still), and all that came with that. I decided to stop speaking in the server because so often what I said drew attention from Adela, and with it criticism or unhelpful argument for the sake of argument. They have (had, idk if its still around) a public channel for asking questions and making suggestions for rule changes etc to the server, and one day someone was upset and requested a new rule that we not be allowed to make any jokes about any language we aren't a native speaker of (such as not being able to say: English can't verb, unless we are native English speaker. I chimed in that it might also be helpful to just assume good intent on the part of other server members and talk to them if they say something you feel is offensive since there is no real way to police if a person is a native speaker of a given language or not. And again a rule like that seemed unnecessarily "mommy-ing" of the adults in this server that claims to promote a mature atmosphere. Another mod responded to me, we all chatted in the channel things seemed fine. Adela came in hours later and scoured my ass, with a pinged reply. At this point I did behave poorly. I admit it. I unblocked Adela and DMd them that I had unblocked them specifically to let them know that I did not appreciate their behivior and that I was requesting that they no ping/reply/address me at all. I sent a screen shot of that DM to MaryBerry. I was not cruel, but I was BLUNT, and I did tell Adela that I did not appreciate her response. For transparency here is a shot of what I sent her.

what I then sent to the server owner

and the warning I received in response:

At this point I decided that the only way for me to be able to be present in the server was to be a lurker, watching and enjoying what my friends and partner participated in but not able to share anything myself. But I stayed because it was one server, where a lot of people I knew had congregated and so much easier than DMing 15 people to keep up with them. Then **4 months later** came the bruhaha that was referenced in part one of this blog. Adela broke rules again, it caused a stir and people spoke up, including me about this continuing to be an issue [mods not applying the rules to themselves or their friends] and retaliating against those who spoke up. One mod asked me in honestly in public chat why I stayed in the server if i did not feel i could even speak in it, and I answered honestly, that I stay because i know and am liked by many people here, and its nice to see what they are up to. Another mod suggested that perhaps I should evaluate if the server was a good fit for me since I didn't feel I could participate, and in that context it came off very much as "get out" to the point of other people asking as well in chat. I asked for clarification if I was being asked to leave the server of my own accord, and was told that no, that was a decision for me to make. I chose to stay, and was unceremoniously banned a day or two later without any further interaction from any mod, any notification, or warning. To be clear in the idk 9+ mo I was in the server I received one warning and I accepted it. As shown above. That was MONTHS before I was banned. When several of my friends asked why I was banned in open chat, the mods released their patented "we never ban without communicating why/warning/etc" and said that unfortunately I was banned for reasons "unrelated" to me questioning why the rules did not apply to the mods.

#fandom wank #30+ fanfic discord #age does not equal maturity. #fandom #discourse #mods behaving badly #make informed choices #discord drama #toxic culture #sure did save these receipts

[literalgrill]

Do NOT Support Hard Drive On Patreon

You might see friends today suggesting you support Hard Drive on Patreon today. You know, the funny video games version of The Onion? As a journalist, I will firmly tell you DO NOT GIVE THEM A DIME.

The CEO has pushed out all former staff that have built the site up to its current greatness and has been pushing the use of AI. The staff begged to have a Patreon before basically all being pushed out, but the idea was refused until now, when it will only line the pockets of a single person instead of hard working writers.

I know they might have provided laughs before, but Hard Drive is a shell of what it was once. Let it die and support the people who actually made those moments of joy possible. Don't believe me? Check out what former employees are saying below:

Kevin Podas: Okay you know what, I would feel bad saying nothing about this, so here goes:🚨SAVE YOUR MONEY🚨

We passionately advocated for a Patreon at Hard Drive & were aggressively shot down. The talent & people who built the site were pushed out. To see this now is beyond upsetting. For the past few years or so I put a lot of myself into this website. I pitched a ton of jokes, got over 120 articles published, & met a lot of great people. I'm sure if you've been following me for some time you could easily see this.

However, there is a lot of misinformation. I was eventually promoted to Managing Editor of the site & was ecstatic. Grateful for the opportunity. Felt like all of my hard work in the comedy mines was finally paying off. But things took a turn for the worst, & each day there were new surprises that affected our livelihoods. These were all very avoidable surprises, mind you.

A patreon was going to be our hail mary, but alas, for some reason, the power that be did not want it. Causing us to leave a dream job behind. "At least we did all we could," we consoled ourselves afterwards. I put a lot of myself into this project. I pitched all sorts of ideas that could have helped-- we all did. Merch collaborations, Patreon-integrated YouTube content, so much more. And most of them were shot down out of sheer stubbornness and nothing more. To see lie after lie spread, and multiple big publications and YouTubers that I am a fan of promote this Patreon under these pretenses is incredibly upsetting. There are so many receipts.

Please share this and consider pulling out if you've already put money into this. On Hard Drive using AI, also from Kevin Podas: I can't personally confirm that part aside from some of the recent header images for articles on both Hard Drive and Hard Times are being made with AI. As far as writing, it's been mentioned in the past, but I personally do not know. Maybe others do, maybe not. MORE From Kevin Podas suggesting the owner denying a Patreon being set up earlier cost an artist a job that was replaced by AI: We had a social media person who was awesome! He made the images until this AI implementation. He had to leave because ad revenue was low and a Patreon was aggressively refused.

Luca Fisher: at the risk of burning some bridges, i have to back up kevin here. i've only been part-time, in-and-out of hard drive since i got in last year, but i can corroborate that management doubled and tripled down about not hosting a patreon/crowdfunding and that many other suggestions and ideas, including mine (and ones much smarter than mine!), were shot down in really long, apocalyptic threads of everyone left on deck desperately trying to come up with ways to keep the lights on. managerially it has been messy and sad

i've written for multiple publications that have long since died, ones that were in the process of dying, and ones that, in this case, are soon to be put in the ground. it is sad and sucks every time. i don't know what could have been done differently, but i do know that a lot of great writers and content creators were left shorthanded and unhappy by the way things have gone. and it is sort of puzzling to see the sudden championing of patreon after we were all told plenty of times that it couldn't work and we should move on also, just to add my own personal two cents here, i was really disappointed by the shuttering of many different article sections on the site over the past 6-8 months. i understand cutting corners in a deficit, and i know it had to be done. that said…

all in all, i'm really sad to see this all happen. i don't fault anyone, if only because i don't really know enough about how this all can happen to make sense of it. games journalism is in a sad, sorry state, and will likely no longer be a thing in the next decade

VideoSealMan: I'm gonna say this because I think I deserve to. For months, MONTHS on end I was bugging Hard Drive management about a Patreon. Often I got ignored for a week+, but when I actually got a response I was encouraged to - of all things, write up a Google Doc pitching the concept I did it regardless. I wasn't the only one trying to sway management on a Patreon, but so fiercely was I fighting for it that last night, I was accused of making this comment directly by the CEO! With no evidence whatsoever! After I'd been gone for over a month.

I vouched so hard for Patreon because I wanted all the writers and creatives working with Hard Drive including myself to get paid better. When I actually got a response, the idea was often shut down. Eventually due to the state of my company, my pay was cut for a second time I confronted management alongside a couple other important figureheads at the org and told them that if we couldn't do a Patreon - I could no longer financially justify staying there. The answer was still no, so I left. Baffled at the decision, but whatever.

It is unendingly frustrating to know that myself and many other people who put their soul into Hard Drive LEFT because of management's absolute refusal to compromise on a Patreon, to then see them launch one anyway a month later and get over 1000 people pledging money. I'm seeing a lot of things float around about greed and people being fired. No one was fired. Everyone who left, left because they were sick of management's decision-making. And honestly, management is a lot of things but I would not call them greedy. (From my experience.) They did genuinely make an effort to pay people as much as possible. I found the pay very fair for a while. I am not disputing that I was paid what I was owed - yet management frequently feels the need to remind critics of that. Lmao, yes. I was paid what I was owed. No one is disputing payment. You did the bare minimum a business owner should do and paid everyone their due, very well done. I make no allegations of greed, cheating or foul play. I make allegations of poor management and incompetence that has fucked over other people.

Basically the only people left at Hard Drive have been there for about 2 months. They will reap the rewards of this successful Patreon I and so many others passionately fought for for so long. We will not see a dime.

I do not know the new people at Hard Drive, But I feel bad for them. They were haphazardly thrust into Hard Drive's workplace with little to no explanation on how anything works, or given any context on the state of the place. Even now managements feeds them half-truths and misinformation about other people's grievances. I am broke and have been for a while. I had to move out of my flat in Reading and back with my family because of how little money I was making. This has basically doomed my flatmate to moving back in with abusive parents, which is something I feel guilty about every day. If we had gone with the Patreon I worked myself hoarse over back then, this could have been avoided. Some of my other good pals could also not have been fucked over.

It was a bad judgment call, but it's not a crime. It's just management getting it wrong.

So should you give to the Hard Drive Patreon? I don't know! I don't think any of the new people working there to patch up the holes left by the recent mass exodus have any bad intentions. Maybe they deserve it! But it is not the same site you knew a year ago, or even a month ago. Myself and many people who were there far longer than me and did far more for it than I did are all gone now because we could not deal with management's terrible decision-making and dogass communication any longer. That's what you should know, imo

I had an agreement in place with management that I would receive the next 8 months of revenue from the Hard Drive YT channel from my leaving in November. This was a deal I appreciated, and thought was very fair on management's behalf. So far, the deal has been honoured for 2 months. However as of last night I was removed from the Hard Drive Slack without warning, and as an editor for the YouTube channel. This means I no longer have any way of verifying how much I am owed, I just have to take their word for it. I'm sure management will make their own statements full of half-truths and weird language on the many cases being brought against them - I'd take everything they say with a pinch of salt if some of the screenshots I've seen of them talking about me are any indication lol

To management; I do not want to talk to you. I want you to DM me a screenshot of how much I'm owed every month and then send me the money per our agreement until June, then we can go our separate ways. Do that and admit to your mistakes, and maybe you can recover your reputation! That's it from me, lol. If they pull out of the deal and fuck me over I'll have more to say, but most of what I know is other people's stories of incompetence and poor decision-making, lol. I genuinely get no pleasure out of doing this; I do not think management is evil - I just think they're really bad at what they do and it's cost other, more talented people, lol. You should believe the writers imo

One last thing I wanna say btw, management did often stress that no one should try to make Hard Drive a full time thing. They were transparent about that, and that is fair. I was working on it because at a few points, I was lead to believe we actually were doing a Patreon. Many other ppl have similar stories of being strung along by management changing their minds and stop-starting shit every 2 weeks. We all made the fatal mistake of overestimating our manager - who would tell you one thing one day and something totally opposite the next week lol

Hunter R. Thompson:

I'm not your dad, but speaking as a Hard Drive writer, I don't know that funding Hard Drive on Patreon is worth it

The driving talent on the back end—behind the kickass site I joined in 2019—have peaced out over the years as the site's been (in our view) increasingly mismanaged. Mismanagement like, not setting up crowdfunding before the ship sank and all its best crew failed; or publishing a screenshot of Andy Ngo pedojacketing a trans writer, complete with her deadname; or a disgruntled ex-writer getting falsely accused of shit-talk, by actual staff. I'm grateful for the writing I've gotten to produce for HD (and will forever be kicking myself for not writing even more, in the four years I've had to do it!! i'm a dumbass!!!) but it is very much no longer the site I signed up for.

I don't want to resign as a contributor altogether, because I'm open to the idea of the site recovering and bad practices being retired as finances level out-- it would just be dishonest for potential backers to not be Aware Of The Circumstances, I think.

Jeremy Kaplowitz: i truly don't want to start shit, but feel compelled to say: i want to see Hard Drive succeed w/o resorting to throwing former writers & editors, myself included, under the bus. surely there's a way to save the site without building it over the corpses of those who left. my $0.02 i don't blame anyone who wants to sign up for the HD patreon and i support the website, but that includes those who worked on it for years, have complaints, and don't deserve to be treated like bitter assholes like this kind of stuff is just objectively true, meanwhile there's these new writers who joined the site after i left (meaning, in the last ~3 months) claiming people are liars. decide for yourself if you care, but this is what happened! [Quotes this Tweet]

Seth Finkelstein: Writing for Hard Drive has been a privilege the past few years, and it makes me so angry to see people I looked up to get jerked around behind the scenes. The amount of grenades the editors jumped on our behalf is immense, and I don't think the way they're being treated is right.

Other Bits On AI: We do know for sure however that AI art has been used by the site. Its fucking owner confirms it here:https://twitter.com/MattSaincome/status/1743040541603123622. Seems the owner pushed AI written articles as well! TayFabe: My vaguetweet is making the rounds & these made me apoplectic. - owner regularly lobbied using ai. Once he tested it & said ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. - ai images were used on the site & socials w/o consulting the team or disclosing it publicly I found the ai bit relevant to include bc 1) it illuminates a stark change in HD's current direction & leadership, 2) ai images have previously been used on the site and (since deleted) ig posts, 3) ai content fucking sucks, and repeatedly pushing to use it is a telling quality The "handful of writers who chose to leave" includes 2 editors-in-chief (both cofounders who wrote a combined total of >1,000 articles & defined the voice of HD), & at least 3 other editors. These guys put in WORK since 2017, so cool to be corrected by ppl who joined in Nov 2023 [Link to mentioned vague tweet from post.] More from TayFabe: owner continuously lobbied for using ai in every possible way. No one else wanted to do it, but he kept on, saying ai was writing better satire than 25% of the HT/HD writers. Also, ai images were used on the site & socials without public disclosure or consulting the team.

The owner has responded now multiple times in a private discord... Thank you for people sharing screenshots! First Screenshot:

Kevin's Response: He banned me from the server for speaking out, so no, I didn't see it. And he gave no indication of a timeline, it was just "we'll do one when *I* say so" and gave every inclination he was totally against it. It bred an environment that pushed our hands to have to leave. Screenshot Round Two:

Kevin's Response: "Starting one in 3 months" is an absolute lie. He denied it, I have screenshots and others who can confirm. No timeline was given. Just "this is what it is now" and like, I couldn't live off of that. I wanted to do more but he was allergic to good ideas from others around him.

Matt, owner of Hard Drive, responds publicly on Twitter.

Matt: Kevin, the patreon launch was delayed because I didn't think it would work. Everyone is happy that it did work. Everyone who left the site because we didn't have money to pay for creative content which didn't revenue is welcome to return home. But unclear why the hostility.

Hard Drive paid out literally every dollar it had, then a bunch more, to creative people who worked on the site. When we ran out of money, we couldn't pay anymore. We did our best.

Kevin: Right, and my point of this thread was that it was completely and totally avoidable. This is reasonable to be upset about. How could I have been any more clear?

Matt: If we knew with 100% certainly that the community would have supported us via patreon, we would have done that. We didn't know. We had tried 4 years ago and got no support. We were wrong this time. We did our best to figure it out. We paid all the money we could.

Kevin: So you knew with 100% certainty this time? Or you took a leap of faith?

Matt: It was a last gasp panic effort after ad rates got cut in half on january 1st due to seasonal spending changes. We didn't know it would work. We were embarrassed to ask for support. We wanted to figure it out.

Kevin: Every site has a Patreon. Every YouTuber, comedy group, etc. But you insisted that nobody cared about Hard Drive. Which is wildly untrue. I know you see that now, but again, I think you can see why I and many others are pretty upset. A last ditch panic effort was long overdue. A couple more things from Matt:

It was about the size of the hole we needed plugged budget wise, the time I had left of personal resources, and the past data I had about us trying a patreon (which turned out to be a bad indicator). I didn't think the Patreon would help us fast enough. I made a bad estimation

aka "if we make $1000 more dollars a month via patreon, which would be 10x what we got last time, we will not solve any of our problems. If instead we try to plow down path B, we might make it out in time." That was the thinking. I chose the wrong path, but didn't mean to Kevin also retweeted this comment from the user Matt was responding to: So you're saying that you're bad at running the business, didn't listen to any of your employees until after they were forced to leave their jobs, and now you're going to get more of the money from the Patreon that was their idea in the first place? Matt's Response: Respectfully, I made a mistake delaying the patreon decision. But keeping a comedy site alive for 9 years is not easy, there are lots of potential ideas, and think overall we've done a good and honorable job. Will leave this thread in peace now to allow people their space.

Sorry for linking to Elon's hellsite (derogatory), but sources need links so...

#video games #patreon #hard drive #ai critical

[hyewka]

i seriously need some sub soob🫢

like imagine him squirming and whining because you ONLY kissed his red tip thats leaking precum ehishsisidjdd im going insaneeee

warnings; sub!soobin obvi, sort of pervy, best friends who fuck each other (fwb), puppy pet name, big dick soob, slapping ?? balls??, gets a boner from cleavage, soobin is extra sensitive down there and cums a lot

When Soobin invited you over to his dorm, you don’t exactly expect to have nothing but your phone to turn to as he simultaneously gets worked up over some video game he’s playing and ignores you all around. You should’ve guessed this was going to happen, but you’re bitter about it anyway.

Is it a crime to have thought that he was implying something else by inviting you over?

“I’m bored.” you whine for the umpteenth time, your thumb with no thought scrolling through your feed of posts you’ve already liked and reposted.

When he doesn’t even spare a glance, you scoff and resort to a kick at his back—which to your credit, gets him to adjust his headset and look back to you.

“Yeah?” he mouths, not having heard you before.

You can’t help but think he looked cute today, his pinkish lips and the hair over his eyes making him look even more of a puppy, but before you could even get a word out, his eyes suddenly widen at the faint yell you could hear from his headset, immedietley turning around has he aggresively spams buttons on his controller in panic.

“Holy shit dude, get off my ass I looked away for one—”

You groan into his pillow, making sure to make it as dramatic as possible, proceeding to sulk right after. This was not a productive use of your time. Fifty entire minutes of laying on his bed as he plays a video game. The switch out of your sport bra for a push up right before you came over really is doing nothing for you right now.

When you hear a string of curses spilling out of his mouth, you look over your shoulder curiously and see that his screen was in spectator mode. “You lost?”

He groans, taking off his headset completely, his mic muted. “Mhm, got killed. What’s up though?”

You take note of the screaming now louder from his headphones. Probably at him for getting eliminated. You don’t let him be though, exhaling dramatically looking back to your phone, “What’s up is your bestest, number one, most treasured, hottest friend is horny, sexually frustrated, and bored out of their mind.”

Soobin chokes on practically nothing at the casual mention of you being horny. It’s dumb, like he’s a middle school boy with no experience.

He really was not used to the ‘thing’ between you guys, like, at all. The stolen kisses (which is to be noted very quickly turn into full blown makeout sessions) when no one’s looking, the occasional need to send pics of his hard on to you, slight panic and regret settling in when he sees the ‘read’ receipt with no sign of a response for an entire five minutes (are you not in the mood? did you hate it? will you stop what you guys have going on?), or even the late night calls when you decide to facetime him instead of responding to his blurry nudes through text, and then…well, phone sex seemed to be a normal standard of your friendship. Weirdly enough.

Even if by now you’ve fucked him well over a few times that a mere mention of feeling horny shouldn’t have gotten him as flustered as it just did. But it’s so sudden, the shift from being friends who strongly, and vehemently denied of the secretly dating rumors to…secretly fucking.

“Oh yeah?” comes out a lot more in a loser way than he intended because he basically chokes it out. He’s never been nervous around you, save for the beginning of your friendship.

You’re very much aware of how unjusted Soobin is to the sudden change in your dynamic. Even you think it’s odd that the person you end up texting when you get…needy is Soobin.

Soobin was never the guy you’d think of starting anything even remotely sexual with.

You’ve known him since the years of being taller than him, and you’ve come to learn about his many deep faults along with gross habits you would never let fly under the radar if from someone else, so for him to be the exact type of man you’ve been seeking lately in bed is, well, surprising.

He seems to be the only person who can satisfy you nowadays. But you try not to show it too much, basking much more in how easily he gets flustered. It’s adorable.

“Yeah,” you sigh, shifting position from your stomach to your back and after much contemplation, deciding to take the chance of sitting up straight, “Did you really invite me over to watch you game? You know I don’t play video games.”

You don’t miss the way his eyes trail down, for sure because your chest was in full view now, his tongue prodding out just a tiny bit to wet his lips, almost like out of instinct. That dog. You show a bit of cleavage and he’s already drooling.

To be fair, it is the exact reaction you were fishing out of him. So you’re definitely not complaining.

You end up stifling a laugh, to which he immediately catches like he’s been trained to know your laughs on cue, breaking him out of his daze—an awkward coughing fit delayed a few seconds after to distract from the fact that he thinks he might’ve been caught, blush quickly warming his cheeks. “You think they’re silly, yeah, I know.

“But they’re—they’re not!” he splutters out, “I thought if you watched me play with Beo—”

“Were you just staring at my tits?” you cut him off with half the ability to not just start laughing. It’s worth seeing Soobin’s eyes widen like a cartoon character.

“No!” he says immediately— the crack of his voice doing nothing to help you keep a straight face. See? Adorable.

Then he huffs out a scoff like he’s surprised you’d ever accuse of him of such scandalous behavior. “Just because we fuck doesn’t mean I want to do you every second of the day. I respect you.”

It’s like a game of your cocked brow calling bullshit (more on the fucking thing than respecting you) and him staring back just as intensely as if he truly was not just ogling at your chest. Okay then, fair enough. You’ll get him to break. And admit to it.

“So if I did this…” you unbutton one of the two buttons of your crop top, and your eyes intently watch the way he struggles to not watch your every movement, still keeping his eyes on your face.

Stubborn. You can work with that. He won’t last long.

You drag the unbuttoning of the second one, and when it finally pops out, it’s a full view of your cleavage, cool air of the A.C being the cause of the goosebumps appearing.

And you’re right. He doesn’t last long. Barely even five seconds.

“My eyes are up here idiot.”

He doesn’t even try to hide the blushing anymore, once again licking his lips. You can see the bob of his adam apple when he finally meets your eyes. “Can I see your tits?” he says—the shame of asking is something that overtime became a numbing feeling, because with each time you casually lift your shirt at his request, the easier it gets to push down the feeling of being a pervert.

You break into a wide grin at how easy and straightforward he was—a passing thought of hoping he’s not like, like this for every living thing with fatty tissue on their chest. It’s not jealousy, god no, but it’s better if this was only between you two… for safety reasons?

You pretend to ponder on it but he should know by now that the enjoyment you get out of teasing him is way greater than any feeling.

You decide on what you’ll say, an evil smirk making way. “Am I just a pair of breasts Soobin? Just for you to ogle at? I thought you respected me.”

He shuts his eyes, whining at seeing that his words were very quick to bite him in the ass. “Please. You know I’ll be good.” he whispers the last few words and that has an affect on you. Big one.

Because he isn’t lying. Soobin’s very obedient. And god, you love it. So much.

But you don’t show that, you never do—letting him chase after something for once. Maybe if he gets a little more desperate, you’d think about a quick flash. “You have plenty of my nudes saved, can’t you jerk off to those? Y’know, like you usually do.”

Is it fair to make a jab at the occasional, every so often muffled voice messages in response to even just a slightly revealing picture that you’re asking him the opinion of, where you could hear his unstable breathing and the wet sounds of his pre cum covered shaft? Probably not, especially when you also get off of pics he’d unknowingly send to be the most delicious, mouth watering photo you’ve seen yet.

Soobin, on the other hand, is like, sure he’d go insane. Ever since he was allowed to look at you in the not-only-friends way, he took up every chance you dangled in front of him like a dog with a bone. Showing a little bit of your cleavage? His mind’s running to images. Just thinking of kissing and sucking until your tits go sore makes him so shamelessly a pervert. Seeing the head of his cock disappear between your tits when you took it upon yourself that one day of giving him a taste of what a titty fuck was like—god, it’s forever embedded into his memory.

He still sulks over the fact that you didn’t let him take a video.

Suddenly his well fitted sweats have easily become the most suffocating piece of clothing, his bulge shy of peaking through the fabric and making an obvious imprint. He tries to not look like a sore desperate loser, to look just a tiny bit cooler, but you make it so hard that he’s willing to get on his knees. Like seriously.

You’re back on your phone, looking to be disinterested which makes him bite the insides of his cheeks—already overthinking. Were you mad that he asked to see?

He tentatively puts a hand on your ankle, gauging at least some sort of reaction. You give him that—a glance. “Sorry if like, um— I didn’t invite you just for games obviously— well, okay not ‘obviously’ but I, uh, also don’t think you’re like, a floating pair of…breasts or something.” You cock a brow, really curious of where this Soobin ramble of the day would go.

“You’re my bestest friend—is that corny to say? Shit, well, you are and I think you’re smart, and obviously really funny, and bright and so pretty, like, really pretty and I mean—”

“Soobin where the fuck are you?”

You both look at the headset next to him on the bed, the yelling loud enough to transcend the reason the product was made anyway. He looks back to you and you could tell he intends on finishing his monologue. “And I mean—” he starts again before cursing under his breath at the second time he gets cut off.

“Fucking cuck, are you ignoring us?”

He groans at the stupid item, as if it just ruined a critical moment. Then he looks back at you apologetically. God, he hopes you don’t leave. “Um, well I have to keep playing they’d kill me if—” he panics a little trying to explain but you’re on another train of thought entirely, thinking that this was perfect timing.

“It’s okay, keep playing!” You say, practically gleaming.

His facial expression is a mix of skeptical confusion and desperation. But instead of questioning your enthusiasm, he bites down on his lip for a second. “You—you won’t leave, right? Don’t leave. Please.”

You shake your head, mouthing an ‘I won’t’ and finally, he lets out a breath of relief he didn’t know he was holding in.

He doesn’t know why he’s so desperate for you to stay. It’s not like you don’t see each other, like every day of the week or even call each other when you somehow don’t. But regardless he wants you to stay, and he doesn’t mind coming off desperate for once.

The situation at hand is too obviously right in your face.

His ramble that was cut off short by who you made out to be none other than Beomgyu, and then Heeseung was…kind of sweet.

No, it was sweet. He thinks you’re really pretty? Not just pretty but really pretty. And smart? And funny? He’s so cute holy shit you could just reach out to pinch his rosy cheeks. But you didn’t and you probably won’t. Because something else caught your attention.

His bulge.

It was too…out there for you to not subtly look down every few filler word Soobin mumbled. You’re not sure what got him to pop a full blown boner. The teasing? You only said a few sentences and showed modest reveal of your boobs. But nevertheless, you try really hard to bite away a smile because holy shit, he really is easy.

And it fucking turns you on. More than it should. And more than it would if it was any other person.

If you felt horny before, you were basically drenched when getting a glimpse of his wide eyes at seeing you on the carpet, on your knees as you’re face to face with his crotch. He seems to freeze for a second before he quickly works to get his headset off, trying to abandon the game completely.

“No.” you say sternly, grabbing his dick through his sweats, “Keep playing.”

He mouths a big ‘what’, nearly whisper shouting, his eyes bulging out. You simply shrug, feeling all too smug, and start to palm him over the fabric. He lets out a sigh of pleasure, shutting his eyes.

“Dude, why the hell are you not moving? Fuck’s wrong with Soobin today?” You hear someone yell.

“If you stop, I stop.” You mouth slowly, and he seems to catch it, hands shaking as he reluctantly picks his controller up again.

“You’re evil.”

To that, you give him a smile, not really denying it. Because maybe you were, knowing how sensitive he is.

You hope Soobin’s mic is as shitty as you’ve heard Hueningkai complain a multitude of times, because if not, he’ll have a very hard time on call with his friends from now on. Or maybe not. Maybe it’s a bragging point to have a girl suck you off while playing video games.

You imagine it’d still be a bit awkward anyway.

“How come you’re so big?” you whisper, more to yourself than him, but he catches it, and still reacts, bucking his hips to your touch, groaning. You click your tongue, pushing him down with one hand, as a warning.

“Don’t move. Don’t take your hands off the controller. And don’t make a sound.” It doesn’t take him long before he nods, obediently fixating his eyes on the tv screen.

You coo at how hard he narrows his eyes, thumbs working its action—but you want him to break. Maybe you really are evil.

And maybe he already was breaking.

He spreads his legs more and more, before lifting his ass off the mattress, already impatiently needy.

“Touch me.” he whispers, only for you to hear.

You raise a brow, huffing out a laugh as you decide that maybe you should stop playing around and pull his sweats down to his ankles. You don’t waste a second to.

When you take in the state of his cock, your mouth could water just at how pretty it looks. You’ve seen it well over a dozen times—over pics, over facetime, in real life, but you’re never not in awe each time. His slit was already bubbling precum, the thickness of his dick eye widening— It’s not like you have small hands either, and yet you still can’t fully wrap your hand around him. You don’t think you’ll ever get used to his size.

And god his tip was swollen red you’re sure if you just so briefly touched it he’d spasm and jizz all over your face. So you’re gentle. Or at least, you make an attempt.

Promptly grabbing his dick again, you could feel him grow heavier when you let it sit on your hand for a second. Soobin sighs into his mic, no doubt briefly catching the attention of his friends.

“Soobin, you’re dripping.” you comment, eyes following the trail of cum running down his length to your hand. It’s more in amusement, how he’s basically on the verge of an orgasm without much from you.

You could tell he’s using his last bits of patience to not just outright fuck into your fist, and it fascinates you. You start slowly dragging your hand on his shaft, made easier to navigate with his ridiculous amount of pre cum working as lube.

You watch as he adjusts his position subtly a few times, knowing that he’s trying to keep from slipping out any whines, pursing his lips. But his eyes betray him, they looked distant—not focused. “How many kills?” you ask.

“Zero.”

You furrow your brows, pouting as you still your hands. “I’ll speed up with each kill. You have to win for me puppy or I’ll get sad.”

Soobin doesn’t know exactly how he’d aim let alone manage a kill with the way you grip the base of his cock, but he knows that despite the sincerety of your words, he doesn’t like to think that you’d get sad. He so badly wants to make you proud in some way, happy with that glint in your eyes.

So, he gets a kill.

You hear the comments from his friends, passing compliments and you smile, slowly working your hand. “Got a kill.” he says under his breath, trying his hardest to not fall into the urge of shutting his eyes. Because god, you were good.

“Yeah? For me? Get another one puppy.”

A new fire ignites in his chest as he spams buttons, yearning to hear a praise slip from your lips. The way he knits his eyebrows in concentration and had his tongue peeking out was so adorable you almost lose control. Almost.

His breathing picks up as he says, “Another one.”

You get the confirmation he’s saying the truth by his friends again and you start moving your hand unfathomably fast as a reward, your hand getting sticky. “Gooood boy, getting all the kills.”

The sudden speed gets to Soobin, faltering his streak as he holds back choked up groans, head quickly becoming light. “Too much, too much.” he whispers, soft moans slipping through his breathing. You catch the way his hands loosen its grip on the controller and you smirk.

He’s way too easy to break.

“Too much? Should I stop?”

He shakes his head again, this time more frantic. You could make out the sparkly tears threatening to spill—you’re all too familiar with this. “Please don’t.”

“Then what? What do you want me to do?” you ask slowly, wet sounds of your hand working at his dick so dirty.

“Mouth,” he sighs, not controlling the way his hips buck into your hands despite your disapproval. “Want you to put it in your mouth.”

You almost laugh—your mouth? Last time, he barely lasted a second. You’re not doing that. But you’ll tease him about it regardless.

“Put what in my mouth?”

He doesn’t waste a breath. “Cock. My cock.”

You’re not even sure if he muted his mic by now, but the way he says it in that needy, desperate broken voice is so sinful you’re surprised you haven’t jumped his bones. Too bad you won’t give him what he wants—or at least not completely.

You rub your thumb over the head of his dick, dribbles of pre-cum still messily spurting from his slit. He’s not paying attention to the game—no, his eyes were focused entirely on you. You would scold him, but you’re entirely too aroused by the way his mouth basically waters in anticipation.

You maintain eye contact when you dip your head down slowly, an experimental kitten lick on his tip and he immediately thrusts his hip, dick slipping past your lips. You pull back, expecting that exact reaction—and he whimpers. Whimpers.

It’s not hard to pick up on the screaming from his headset, his friends clearly pissed off that hes been in the same spot for well over a minute now, becoming an easy kill to enemies on the other team. “Puppy, how come you’re losing? I thought you were doing well.”

Before he could respond, you tighten your grip on his shaft, and he groans, trying to bite down the noise—maybe he didn’t mute it after all. It’s almost animalistic how he chases your hand.

But you’re not as forgiving now—misbehaving boys get punished. You lick the underside of his dick, dragging the flatness of it up to his head, saltiness of his pre-cum overpowering your tastebuds before pulling back to see Soobin has basically abandoned the game, head thrown back as both his hands grip the sheets under him, letting out broken pitched moans.

You smile, knowing you gave him the impression that you’d put him in your mouth. No, you’re here to have your fun. He peeks through an eye at feeling you do nothing more, and the moment he does, you slap—hard. Maybe a tad bit harder than you intended.

Your aim was his nutsack, balls full of cum you could see he was holding from the week you’ve challenged him to not jerk off, and god—the way his eyes fly open, jaw slacking as his legs spasm, letting out a sound you’ve never heard a man make— you wonder why you haven’t done this sooner.

“You didn’t get off like I told you to right? Good puppy.” He nods frantically, his vision fogging.

He looks so broken, tears streaming down his cheeks faster than you could even take notice of. If his friends didn’t hear him before, they definitely heard him now. He’s a hiccuping mess, nose running when you decide to give him a little more, swirling your tongue around his tip, warm in your mouth— then you pull back before he loses control and starts fucking your mouth.

“Puppy can’t talk? Your friends know how much of a whore you are now…isn’t that embarrassing?” you coo, your hand still jerking him off. “What would they say knowing you’re my little mutt, obeying each and every word like a dog in heat?”

The words are getting to him. He tried to keep quiet for the sake of his pride— anyone knowing how desperate he gets for you is a hit to his ego, it’s embarrassing the amount of things he’d do just for a chance of eating you out, but this spurs him on— having you degrade him, telling him what exactly he is to you. Your obeying dog.

You could see his lips quivering, and notice the tensing of his body. Quickly, you part your hair to the side, take him in your mouth all the way, trying to relax your throat as to not gag when your nose finally presses against his abdomen—but of course you do, it’s hard not to with how thick he is. It doesn’t take a milisecond before you feel his load spilling down your throat, his big hands moving to hold the back of your head, orgasm crashing down like waves of the pacific came over him.

You stay there for a few more seconds, feeling yourself get lightheaded with how much he manages to cum, and even when you pull away with a need to take a deep breath, you see that his dick was still spurting little bits. “Holy shit.” you say under your breath, slightly coughing as you wipe away at the semen that managed to dribble down your chin.

Soobin had a lot stored.

Soobin falls backwards on the bed, chest heaving up and down, trying to catch his breath, some of his hair plastered to his forehead and his temple. There’s a lot of thoughts spinning in his head. And he doesn’t exactly know how to label them. Lazily, he takes his headset off, throwing it to god knows where.

“Hey. Question.”

“Yeah?”

“Do you fuck other people?”

You perk up at the question, the randomness making you stay silent for a bit until you shrug. “No, not really.”

Soobin sighs. He doesn’t know why. Was it relief? Maybe. Probably.

“Do you?” you ask it almost timidly, unknowingly playing with the threads of your ripped jeans. Thank god to Soobin because he answers quickly, not allowing for any space of anxiousness.

“No. Only you.”

You slowly nod, pursing your lips. “Cool.”

“Yeah, very cool,” then his brows furrow at a thought popping up in his head, “Wait, do you like,”

You raise your brows. “Do I what?”

“Like, you know, suck off other guys?”

You scoff, he’s so ridiculous. You don’t even get to see his reaction to your answers, as you’re sitting on the floor and his back is on the mattress. “No Soobin, I don’t suck off other guys. Well, not as of recently. You’re the only one I’ve been doing this with.”

“Oh, o-okay.” You snort at the cute stutter.

Too bad you don’t catch the small ‘good’ he says under his breath.

note: when i checked the word count I was so shocked we’re keeping that a secret 😭 appreciate any feedback!

#txt smut #soobin smut #sub!soobin #sub!idol #txt hard hours #txt hard thoughts #soobin hard thoughts #soobin hard hours

[cosmerelists]

Cosmere Characters Do Their Taxes

It was just Tax Day in the US! Let's say that Cosmere characters had to pay taxes. How would that go for them?

Sigzil: Knows the tax code inside and out. Saves his receipts. Is basically the IRS's dream guy.

Hoid: Does not pay taxes. This is canon.

Kelsier: Does not pay taxes. This feels canon.

Marasi: Always pays her taxes.

Vivenna: Always pays her taxes.

Denth: Sure talks a lot about how complicated mercenary taxes are but if you listen carefully, he never actually says he did them...

Nale: Rigorously follows the tax code of whatever country he is in.

Wyndle: Claims Lift as a dependent. Reports all illegally acquired income at fair market value, as the tax code requires.

Lightsong: Does not pay taxes because he's, like, a god. But it's always bothered him, somewhere in the back of his mind, for some reason...

Adolin: Cheerfully hires someone else to do his taxes, at least so long as he's single.

Shallan: Does her own taxes, Sebarial's taxes, and Adolin's taxes post-marriage.

Steris & Wax: Do their taxes together. Romantically.

Wayne: Gives so much money to charity that he never owes any taxes. Orders his accountants to find a way for him to pay taxes anyway.

Straff: Does not pay taxes in the way rich people don't pay taxes--through, like, legal loopholes and off-shore accounts and shit

Elend: Rewrites the tax code to pay more taxes.

Lirin: Committed tax fraud. But only once.

Taravangian: Is not allowed to file his taxes when he is too stupid--because he cries about how confusing it is--or when he's too smart--because he's too good at finding all of the super obvious tax loopholes and anyway he's obviously way better than the government at knowing how to spend his own money!

Painter: Got in trouble once for not filing taxes because he knew he didn't make enough to owe any taxes. Seemed kinda stupid to him.

Moash: Makes an ethical argument against taxes, since the tax laws are written to benefit the rich and screw over the poor and he has no control over what the government uses his taxes for.

Kaladin: Is torn between paying his taxes like Dalinar ordered or not paying his taxes since he promised Moash he wouldn't until he finally files his taxes at, like, midnight on tax day

It's a whole thing.

#cosmere #cosmerelists #Sigzil #Hoid #Kelsier #Marasi #Vivenna #Denth #nale #Wyndle #Lightsong #Adolin #Shallan #Steris #Wax #Wayne #Straff #Elend #Lirin #Taravangian #Painter #Moash #Kaladin

[a-dumb-sarcastic-bisexual]

More chaotic Nimona headcanons

Whenever Ambrosius and Nimona want to mess with Bal they do a poor imitation of his accent

Or they’ll use British slang with an American accent 

You’d think this would get boring or the duo would get tired of this

But no

Watching this grown man’s cheeks inflate like a puffer fish never gets old 

One day Bal decided to get back at them by speaking in an American accent

This went on for the whole day and whenever the duo mentioned it he just looked at them like they were crazy

He pretends like it never happened and when the duo brings it up he’ll give them that same look

Ambrosius and Nimona go back and forth between knowing he’s fucking with them and questioning if they imagined it 

Sometimes when he thinks they’re forgetting he’ll say in an American accent “Do you remember when I” and then he’ll stop talking and walk away

It’ll send them spiraling for days 

I find immense joy in the idea that the trio not taking shit from anyone and messing with reporters for fun

One reporter got a little too comfortable with Nimona and asked her to explain in detail her “origin story” and how her shifting works

Like she's some fictional superhero and not a person standing in front of them 

So he straight up acted like he had no idea what the reporter was talking about 

And when he told them that he saw them shift as they walked in they replied in a concerned tone "Sir I have no idea what you're talking about"

And slowly but surely Nimona started to convince the reporter and the crew that they didn't save the kingdom

Shapeshifters don’t exist and they were here to discuss the economic crisis the kingdom was experiencing

And the moment when she knew that she had convinced them all she shifted to look like the reporter and walked out of the room without saying a word

No one in that room kept their job

A lot of people like to act like Bal is a hero not because he helped save the kingdom but because he’s an amputee

They act like he’s someone with an expiration date simply because he’s disabled and often treat him like he’s incompetent 

So he messes with them

A lot of these reporters will insinuate all the things I mentioned but they’ll never say it outright 

So he’ll pretend like he doesn’t know he’s an amputee

He’ll slowly manipulate them until they have no choice but to say outright that they’re treating him like he’s less than human because of his disability

And then he’ll act like he’s just discovering that he’s disabled 

Saying some “Oh my Gods my arm is gone… OH MY GODS IT’S GONE” 

People stopped mentioning the arm after that 

There was one reporter who was really outspoken about the fact that the “Golden Boy” was so easily manipulated by the Director 

And was questioning if someone so easily swayed should have a hand in rebuilding their society

Ambrosius finally sat down with an interview with this dude and the reporter just starts digging into him

Hammering him with questions like “Why didn’t you see through the Director’s lies” “Why did you lead the manhunt against Bal” and “Where were you when the wall fell”

And Ambrosius starts throwing out questions of his own like “Weren’t you very close friends with the Director and weren’t you very outspoken on social media supporting her” “Why were you saying and I quote ‘we need that gutter rats head on a spike’” and finally “what were you doing when the wall fell?” 

And this man had receipts too

He was basically silent when Ambrosius was brought up after this incident

#nimona 2023 #nimona movie #nimona headcanon #nimona #ballister boldheart #ambrosius goldenloin #ballister x ambrosius #goldenheart #I love these chaotic dorks #we love some gaslighting bitches #yes baby mess with the media #fuck with their heads

[unpretty]

hey kitty! if its not too boring of a subject for you, do you think you could talk a little bit about how you stay organized at work? i've been doing the bookkeeping at my job for about 6 months and i'm not doing too badly, but i'm still always worried i'll forget to pay an invoice or lose a credit card receipt or whatever. you're the coolest accountant i know, so any tips you have would be awesome. thank you!!

here's an old post i did about office supplies if that interests you

the two big ones for me are

microsoft to-do

ezstax

these are both Brand Names but alternatives that work for you are fine, these are just what work for me

to-do because my job is literally just doing the same things over and over again so i have lists for things i do every day, every week, every other week, every month, and annually. in my first year of employment every time i got assigned a new task i added it to my list and set it to repeat based on how often it got done and by year two i had most of the things. to-do also lets you create a checklist for each list item, and attach files. i keep my really detailed notes on How To Do My Job in OneNote because that's what i used in college so it's what i'm used to, but breaking everything down into checklists is really handy for me when i forget how to perform basic tasks like an amnesiac baby.

particularly because it has the 'my day' feature where everything due that day automatically gets added to your day so if you forget what you're supposed to be doing you just open it up and it's like "hello have you done all these yet". you can also just add things that are just 'tasks' if they're not recurring, so if someone says "can you do thing by time" i'm like "sure" and then i add it to my list.

i'll put the rest behind a cut because this is only relevant if you are working somewhere that still uses paper for every fucking thing. with digital files just add a date to the beginning of every filename when you save it. you will thank yourself later. give files names descriptive enough that later you can just type LEAVE REQUEST FORM in your start menu in a panic and have the correct file pop up. attaching things to your to-do list items can also save you a lot of time.

oh right, pay one time for foxit pdf instead of getting a subscription to do pdf shit. there's probably alternatives but whatever. foxit works fine. foxit is also trying to sell me a subscription but i ignore that.

ezstax are much dumber, they're little plastic things that let you sort all your paperwork into files and then stack them on top of each other instead of having piles of paperwork all over your desk.

sane people use files and file folders for this but i don't put anything into a file folder until i know for sure that something will happen to trigger my taking the item back out of the folder. because i am going to forget. if i forward a copy and am waiting to hear back, the original invoice is not coming back out of the file until i hear back. i already gave you the paperwork. if you need reminders to get it back to me that's a you problem. i'm not getting paid a management salary so i'm not here to tell anyone how to do their job.

(file folders work fine for credit card receipts because i can paperclip them to the folder to make them stay put and then when the statement comes in i know to get the receipts out of the folder. i only in the last year realized that i could put sticky tabs on cardstock and label each piece of cardstock for a different department and paperclip the receipts to that in order to create subfolders in my credit card folder. i felt very clever about this.)

anyway obviously that creates a problem when i have paperwork that i'm supposed to set aside until i do something else. if it's in a file i will not remember it. it will be forgotten, forever. so instead i keep it on a stack in my desk. so every time it's time to do payroll, i grab the payroll stack, and anything i needed to set aside until payroll is sitting there staring me in the face.

same goes for invoices! i get a stack of invoices and i sort them into 'ready to pay' and 'still needs info', and once that's sorted i put my 'still needs info' stack on top of my ready to pay stack so i can sort through it more thoroughly. i send out reminders for purchase orders and set things in a folder to wait until i get my purchase order back, i email vendors for invoices on statements that i never got, etc etc. i keep my inbox empty except for things that i need to take action on so i don't forget about anything i got emailed about. if there's more than ten emails i will start forgetting things and the situation is dire.

#original #boring work stuff

[808airsoftbros]

A Day With Huh Yunjin (Huh Yunjin)

Author: This is a requested oneshot from my other book in Wattpad. Lastly if you want to check out more oneshots do go to my Masterlist and I hope you enjoy it :)

Y/N's POV

Waking up to a beautiful sunrise, I looked over at my bed to see the missing presence of my gorgeous girlfriend which made me wonder where she could've gone.

Suddenly, I smelled a delicious aroma of food coming downstairs from the kitchen, I got up from my king-sized bed and walked down the stairs to see Yunjin-Noona cooking breakfast.

Quietly as she was occupied with cooking pancakes, I snuck a backhug making her jump a little before becoming a giggling mess.

"You almost gave me a heart attack baby," She said and I chuckled.

"Well I can't help it Noona, you are just so beautiful," I replied as I kept hugging her.

"Okay birthday boy, can you please get yourself cleaned?" She kindly asked and I nodded.

Letting go of Yunjin, I ran upstairs to shower and brush my teeth, I went back downstairs to see that Yunjin was finished cooking breakfast.

She placed the food on the table, I wasted no time digging in as Yunjin did the same enjoying her fruits of labor.

"Do you have anything particular you want to do for your birthday?" She asked.

"Uhm, not really, I just want to be with you," I answered and she smiled.

"Always cute aren't you~? But are you sure you want to stay home?" She asked and I shrugged.

"Unless you have something planned then I'll be more than happy to go with it," I replied and she nodded.

"Is the mall cool with you?" She proposed and I agreed.

As soon as we finish eating breakfast, Yunjin takes the dishes and cleans them up, we get dressed, and go into the garage into her car.

The drive was about ten minutes long until we reached the shopping center, she parked in an open stall and we got out.

Making our way into the shopping plaza, there were so many stores to browse and shop, but I followed Yunjin wherever she went, which is the Lego store.

"I thought you never liked being here," I mentioned.

"Which one do you want? The UCS Venator?" She asked and my eyes widened.

"W-What?" I stuttered and she giggled.

"You heard me right? Which set do you want?" She asked and I gulped.

Pointing at the UCS Venator she nods, she takes the huge ass set from the shelf and places it on the cashier's counter after waiting in line for a bit.

"Is this all for today?" He asked as he rang it up.

"Yes please," She answered.

"Alright that will be $619," He said and she paid with her card.

Putting the set into a giant bag, he handed over the receipt to her and wished us a good day, and we thanked him before we left the store.

Left totally in shock that Yunjin-Noona actually paid for a $600 Lego set that I've been saving up for months now, she pecks me on the cheek.

"You lucky that I love you so much," She mentioned.

"B-But you didn't have to, Noona..." I mumbled and she giggled.

"It's your birthday baby and I've been so busy with my Idol life so it's the least I can do for you," She assured and I sighed.

Continuing shopping and browsing the numerous stores, she kept on spoiling me with expensive gifts and shit which I'm not complaining but damn this is too much.

However, she takes me into a Victoria's Secret making me blush as there were so many pairs of underwear and lingerie on display.

"Are you okay?" She checks.

"N-Noona, did you really have to bring me here?" I nervously asked.

"Oh, cutie, I just needed your opinion," She answered and I gulped.

Choosing some pairs of lingerie, panties, and bras, she took my hand and dragged me into the dressing room and I waited outside the stall.

"What do you think of this?" She asked wearing sexy black lingerie.

"Oh my God... It looks so good," I complimented and she smirked.

"Okay then," She noted and went back inside to change.

Patiently waiting for her to change, she comes out five minutes later with a different pair of panties and bras nearly exposing her clit and breasts.

"How about this?" She asked and she began posing.

Thankfully, I was able to control my hormones, I gave my critique to her and she noted them before going back into the changing stall making me sigh in relief.

Knowing her antics, I figured that she had something special planned for me tonight and she knows that lingerie and revealing panties drive me nuts.

After changing back into her outfit, she paid for the lingerie along with the panties and bras and we continued browsing the various stores.

"Are you hungry?" She asked and my stomach growled.

"I take that as a yes," She pointed out and I embarrassingly nodded.

Walking to the food court on the other side of the mall, we went to a ramen shop ordered ramen bowls for lunch, and paid for the bill.

"How is it?" She asked.

"It's delicious, thank you for the meal, Noona," I thanked her and she smiled.

"Anything for my precious birthday boy~," She replied before patting my head.

Enjoying the ramen bowls, we finished shopping around the mall, placed our stuff into the backseat of her car, and drove back home.

Later on, she informed me that her members were coming over for my birthday party making me excited.

Around late afternoon, I was working on the UCS Lego Venator set when I heard the doorbell ring I looked at the camera to see it was her bandmates so I went downstairs to the door and opened it to let them inside.

"Hello, Noonas!" I greeted.

"Happy birthday, cutie!" Chaewon greeted and hugged me.

"Yah, back off Unnie~!" Yunjin said as she gently pushed her off of me.

"Aww~. What's the matter Yunjin, afraid I'm going to steal your baby~?" She teased and Yunjin hugged me tightly.

"No one touches my baby except for me~!" She said before pouting making the girls laugh their ass off.

Afterward, we set up the party, Zuha-Noona placed the cake onto the table along with delicious food that they cooked earlier along with fruit punch and drinks.

"Shall we get started?" Chaewon-Noona asked and the girls cheered.

Throughout the whole night, the girls sang karaoke covers of their own songs and other group's songs. Eventually, Yunjin-Noona and Manchae forced me to sing even though I didn't want to but I did it anyway just for the hell of it.

"Wow, you did so well, baby, maybe you should debut with us!" Yunjin-Noona complimented.

"N-No, Noona, I could never!" I argued and they giggled.

"Well, you never know until you try!" Manchae encouraged.

After singing our last song, we went to the kitchen dining table, ate the food, and moved on to cutting the cake after they all sang Happy Birthday to me.

"Did you make a wish baby?" Yunjin-Noona asked and I nodded.

"I wish to spend the whole day with Noona!" I answered.

"Aww~ He really is a cutie~!" Kazuha cooed and I blushed.

Opening the first present from Kazuha, was a brand new pair of AirPods Pro! Jeez, they really spend this much money on me?! But I'm still grateful.

Moving on to Chaewon's present, I took the contents out of the gift bag and it was a Lego BTS set and a letter wishing me happy birthday signed by all the girls.

The rest of the girl's gifts were also expensive as shit consisting of gift cards and even their own merchandise like lightsticks and albums.

"T-Thank you girls so much, I don't know how to repay you all!" I thanked them and they smiled.

"It's nothing Y/N, we're all happy to have you with us," Chaewon replied.

When it was starting to get late and the girls had to return to their schedule tomorrow morning consisting of errands and dance practices, they all went back to their dorm.

I was up in the bathroom brushing my teeth, and changing into my pajamas, I went into the bedroom and my jaw dropped as I saw my girlfriend in lingerie.

"Hello, baby~," She said with a devious smirk.

"W-What is the meaning of this?" I nervously asked and she grabbed me by the collar before pinning me onto the bed.

"Your final birthday present~," She whispered into my ears before attacking my neck.

#kpop #kpop idol #kpop gg #bxg #x male reader #kpopidol #huh yunjin #le sserafim yunjin #le sserafim #jennifer huh #yunjin #kpop fluff #fluff #kpop oneshot

[n3ptoonz]

How’d u think earth realm boys would react to their wife telling me there ready for kids 🎤

mk1 hcs: how the earthrealm guys react to their wife being ready for kids

warnings/tags: suggestive, fluff, female reader obv

Liu Kang

The way you brought it up was so subtle and casual. It was during his downtime, which was kinda rare. A simple "Hey...I think I'm ready to have children." and Liu is looking at you with surprised eyes and a full heart.

Being the kind of man Liu is, and how busy his life has become since being appointed as a god, this man set an exact date and time where there would be zero distractions. All his focus and effort was on you. And in you (ba dum tss)

So be prepared for a long night of passion, love, lust, and care. Cause you're not leaving that bed until you've gotten every last drop

Doesn't mind the gender. Boy, girl, he would love them just the same. Hell, even if it was more than one child at once, he wouldn't hesitate to give them the world.

Smoke

You mentioned it while you two were cuddled up on the couch. Little did you know how red his face turned until you felt his heart beat increase in real time, looking up at him with his genuine concern.

At first you thought he was nervous or probably didn't want to, and once he saw your slight frown he immediately countered that thought. He was so excited he froze. Endless reassurance from him until you verbally say you got it.

Did you think he wouldn't nervously suggest you start as soon as possible?? Pish posh, you are sad- happily mistaken. "Why not try right now?" he said, except he's stuttering over his own words and sweating profusely. No matter how many times you've been intimate with one another, he's always nervous around you <3

Gender doesn't matter to him either, however he does lean more on the side of a daughter. Simply because he'd die at the sight of a little girl running around the house that looked like you. If you had a son though, he'd be sure he doesn't meet ol uncle Bi Han bro would prob try to recruit

Johnny Cage

What if I told you he brought the idea to you one day as a "joke" and you're immediately like "That's crazy, I was going to say the same thing!"? You both looked at each other with narrowed eyes before making a run for it to the bedroom

Less talk, more action. It's safe to say y'all were up all night, touchin', lovin', going multiple rounds to the point where you forgot the entire reason for heading straight to bed. But hey, who's complaining? Johnny promised to tap that at the earliest opportunity (yes, i went there)

He SWORE that cowgirl and mating press were the "only efficient ways" to make sure you'd definitely get pregnant. As if going raw wasn't enough already-

Daughter. He wants a daughter. Give the man a daughter. He won't shut up about being a girl dad when you aren't even a month in yet. He's practicing dad jokes. Even coming up with ones that are tailored to daughters. Has a CVS receipt list of girl names and the only one you both decided that was perfect is "Cassandra/Cassie" (wink) He CANNOT wait to have another favorite girl in his life to spoil!

Raiden

It was after training. You finished first and watched him complete his, and the idea came to you while he was helping one of the younger recruits. You just laid it on him without warning: "I think we should have kids." and cue him almost spitting out his water. Was he dreaming?!

Another nervous one who blushed and stuttered a bunch upon trying to conjure up a response. The thought of having a child with you has been on his mind for some time now and it's like you read his mind, he just didn't want to overwhelm you.

Speaking of overwhelming, that was all out the window once you got home. Going from a peaceful walk to a heated make out session on a matter of seconds. Not to mention, you both had a longgg day of training and could use a shower...why not save some money on the water bill!

Raiden is too good with all types of kids to really have a preference. Growing up with his little sister AND kung lao gave him experience on both sides

Kung Lao

After your weekly sparring session, you got to thinking. You're already married, you've seen him handle kids and younger people well, and most of all he looks so damn hot when he's sweaty and out of breath. Not an unfamiliar sight to you at all!

It was when you two went to Madam Bo's for a good after-spar meal when you slyly threw it into the conversation. Mid bite, he couldn't help but back up from his food and look at you with that classic smirk he does and his dimples are fully visible (currently dying at this imagery.) And he'd end up saying something cocky but playful like "You think I'd oppose you carrying the next great Kung Lao?"

Got straight to it when you got home. Luckily you had already showered after the session, otherwise the water bill would've been looking like a traditional Chinese scroll after you were done. Prepare for his teasing, flirtatiousness, and pride to be multiplied by a thousand

I feel like he'd want a boy, and we all know why. He's not at all opposed to the idea of having a daughter. But if your first child was a daughter, you're going back to that king sized mattress once you've fully healed and trying again! (who's complaining 🤨)

Kenshi Takahashi

He had come home from a long day of a series of trips and tasks given by Liu Kang. You were in the kitchen brewing some tea late at night just because when you heard him come in. He wasn't exhausted, but you could tell he just wanted to drop everything and spend all his time with you the way he plopped down at the dining table.

When you offered food he politely declined since he had already eaten earlier. But he could sense something else was on your mind by the slight shift in your tone. Being visually impaired, his auditory has improved considerably since. "Is something on your mind?" he asked. "I think we should have kids." you responded, sitting next to him with your cup of tea.

He was at full attention now, whatever tired him from the day vanished just like that. You took his silence as uncertainty, so as you began to start listing the pros and benefits, he quickly cut you off with a "Let's do it." "Seriously?" you said, just to make sure you heard him. He stood and took your hand in his, "I'm very serious. We can start tonight, tomorrow, next week. The sooner the better." (hey, starting tonight didn't sound like a bad idea 😮‍💨)

He says he doesn't really stress the gender, but he'd like a son. Kenshi would adore your child under any circumstance, but being an only child (idk if that's canon but it's gonna be today XD) who practically raised most of his younger cousins who mostly consisted of girls, he gets a little giddy at the thought of having an older son younger daughter dynamic around the house.

Sub Zero

With how busy he is all the time and how even more tense he's become since the rift, it was a little difficult to find a way to get his undivided attention. However, the whole reason he married you is because you don't take any shit. You voiced your opinions and concerns whenever you deemed fit, and it never got in his way. So, you waltzed into his office on a mission.

It was one of the few times he wasn't running around or training his heart out. He just got done talking to Cyrax when you walked in looking as determined as the day you met. He knows you never interrupt him unless it's something terribly important. At a moment's notice, he gestured for Cyrax to leave so you could speak your peace.

"What is it?" he asked. You made sure the door was securely closed behind you before walking over to sit in his lap. He was quite surprised but also would be lying if he claimed he didn't enjoy it. "Let's have kids." you said. He always told you to be blunt with him about anything, and this was no exception. "Alright." he replied, seldom reason to say no, especially to the love of his life.

Bi Han would for sure want a son. He's set on carrying on tradition, even if he did oppose some of his late father's views. If you had a daughter as your first born, like Kung Lao y'all aren't stopping until you had a son. Though, he knows he will have to learn to raise your kids better than how he was raised. He'd rather die than ever neglect or overwork his children. Plus, you wouldn't have any of that anyway.

Scorpion

Despite being busy a lot as the head of his new clan, he always makes time for you. All his down time was yours unless you said otherwise. You were giving fighting advice to a recruit when Kuai approached you, a gentle warm hand on your shoulder. Earlier in the day, you said you wanted to talk in his free time

After excusing yourself and talking to him on the way to his office, you wasted no time laying it on him. "Kuai...I think we're ready for kids." He stops in his tracks and looks directly into your eyes. "...You're sure about this?" he asks softly, taking your hands in his with the most gentle gaze you've ever seen from him. He's been thinking about this for a while now, but didn't know how to bring it up. Your approving nod with a smile set his heart ablaze with happiness.

Because of his busy schedule, like some of the other kombatants with a lot on their plate, there's a set day and time. And once that time comes...it's tiimmeee (mariah carey voice) That night is gonna be filled with romance and deep love for one another.

Kuai wants a boy. He, like Kenshi, wants the older son and younger daughter dynamic, but for no particular reason. He just likes it. His feelings wouldn't change if your first kid was a girl though, the older daughter younger son dynamic would remind him of how his mother treated Tomas when they were kids before she passed.

a/n: as a mf who doesn't even want kids, this was so fun and cute to write omg😭ty anon for the idea! remember y'all my asks are open and i'd be down to do x or 11 if you want! just clarify pls <3

#n3ptoonz #mk1 #mortal kombat #mortal kombat 1 #bi han #bi han sub zero #fluff #mk fluff #mk imagine #kuai liang #scorpion mk #kung lao #mk1 kung lao #raiden mk1 #johnny cage #kenshi takahashi #mk smoke #tomas mk1 #tomas vrbada #liu kang #mk x reader #mk headcanons

[melpomene-writes]

hands on

minatozaki sana x gn! reader // fluff

“look alive, y/l/n,” jeongyeon says, dropping a stack of paperwork on your desk in your little office in the rear corner of the shop. “i have those preliminary expense reports you asked for.”

it’s at least an inch of unstapled loose-leaf paper, of order forms and itemized receipts and pages of faxed correspondences with a junkyard about scrap metal and hauling services for jeongyeon’s project of the moment.

“pretty sure i asked for these weeks ago, jeong,” you roll your eyes and drop the pen in your hand, “and that i’ve been asking almost every day since.”

there’s a tray on the left side of your desk for incoming documents, a tray on the right for outgoing stuff, and you were in the middle of updating the inventory log — which you had to do before you could call in a round of orders from a local shop — when jeongyeon dropped everything smack in the middle, so that it covered the top half of the sheet you were working on.

you can practically feel your blood pressure rise at the prospect of having to comb through all this. you’ll be at it for days.

“possibly,” jeongyeon shrugs, dropping into the vacant office chair next to the little bookcase and rolling it up to sit opposite of you, “but did you ask me to collect these stupid things for everybody?”

“everybody,” you ask, incredulous. “you mean to tell me that everybody in the shop tracked their stuff down, and that it’s all right here?”

“everybody,” jeongyeon smirks, “i know, i’m good. you don’t have to tell me.”

“you mean to tell me, when i comb through all this, all the half-sheets and torn receipts with god knows what streaked all over them, nothing will be missing?”

“seriously, y/n,” jeongyeon scoffs, “every mechanic in the shop, and all our shit, is in there. even haeun. you might even say we’re all—”

“please don’t—” you try.

“accounted for,” jeongyeon finishes. and then she grins, just like she did when you had collected everything to make last year’s expense reports, and the year before. “where’s your sense of humor? that killed you the first time.”

the first time, you were so overwhelmed by the unfamiliar sort of paperwork necessary for keeping a brand-new business open and in good standing with the irs that you would’ve laughed at anything. you laughed hysterically when chaeyoung tripped over an open quart of oil, even cried a little when momo slipped in the slickness and the lug wrench in her hand went flying.

“this is the third, jeongyeon. three times now i’ve had to hear it.”

“you’re a lucky girl, always being here when i make it.”

“try it on me next year, and you’re going to need a new shop manager slash accountant,” you threaten.

“i’m calling bullshit on that,” jeongyeon says, leaning back in her chair and yanking down the zipper on her jumpsuit, “one, because you wouldn’t know what to do with yourself if you couldn’t boss around all us grease monkeys every day.”

“pretty sure i could adopt a few feral cats and let them make huge messes and drive me crazy for a much smaller investment but continue.”

“two, because, while i’m definitely the brains in every other aspect of our life together, this is your place to shine in that regard.”

“what a compliment,” you say dryly.

jeongyeon shrugs again, and adds, “we both know you’re the only one who understands your filing system, and i would probably tank both our credit and take this place under in like three days without you.”

“i literally just file things by serial number and there’s a drawer for each filing year, jeong. plus—”

“bleh, you’re brilliant, y/n, but that’s all gibberish,” jeongyeon sighs, “and, three, you love me.”

“do i?” you ask, even though you’d be hard-pressed to come up with another reason for pooling your savings with jeongyeon to open the first all-female mechanic shop in the state.

“you will,” jeongyeon informe you, “when you look through that stack and notice that our receipts and junk are all sorted by mechanic, and in chronological order. i even threw in some sticky notes for your convenience.”

“holy shit,” you say, actually blown away as you lean forward to confirm that the tops of some of the papers are marked with names: momo and haeun and chaeyoung and… “i love you.”

“duh,” jeongyeon says, pushing up out of her seat, “so, just keep that mind, the gratitude and the love, while i run home to grab my lunch, will you?”

“who’s on the floor,” you ask, before jeongyeon can even drag the rolling chair back to its spot.

“just you and me, babe. momo had to pop over to alexandria to pick up a few parts. chaeyoung should be in soon, though.”

you groan, “pick a timesheet, like, any timesheet, jeongyeon, and find me a shift that chaeyoung wasn’t late for.”

“golden hands, y/n,” jeongyeon reminds you, still creeping toward the door, “and she’s nice enough.”

“and her family did our commercials for free, i know.”

“you’ll barely even know you’re here alone, y/n.”

“uh, yeah,” you complain, “i will, because chaeyoung will be late, and momo always hangs around to flirt with that clerk who gets disappointed whenever we have to make the pick-up instead of her, and your mouth is saying lunch, but my instincts are telling me that you’re still doing all the honeymoon sex stuff with nayeon instead of eating.”

“can you blame me,” jeongyeon says, a little dreamily, slouching against the wall.

“that means i’ll be sitting here, one eye on all this,” you wave a hand over the mess on your desk, “the other on the garage, and i’ll have to talk to customers. customers, jeong. they’re the worst, and they can smell my discomfort.”

“has anybody ever told you you’re too smart for your own good?”

“you,” you respond, folding your hands over the bottom-half of the inventory.

“all of that might be true,” jeongyeon admits, “and it might also be true that someone is only making a big deal about my hot, married sex life and momo’s tawdry flirting with clerk girl because they haven’t even been on a date in months—”

“i’m—”

“a horny mess,” jeongyeon fills in, “trust me, everyone knows. but you’ll be fine, y/n. nobody’s even going to come in, and if they do, just pretend they aren’t keeping our business alive, be your cute, friendly self and sit them down somewhere with a cup of water or something. i’ll be right back, i swear.”

“fine,” you begrudgingly say, “but i’m going to teach you all about this filing system when you’re back.”

“i love you,” jeongyeon beams, and you know that means your best friend is going to use every move possible to avoid looking at the system, “i’ll be quick. thirty minutes, tops.”

“yeah, yeah,” you say, pushing the stack jeongyeon dropped further away to get back to the inventory as jeongyeon disappears through the door.

///

jeongyeon’s been gone for fifteen minutes when you look up through the clear glass of the office window to see a car pulling up to the open garage door.

you sigh and push up from your desk to greet the customer at the door.

you’ve done most of the paperwork, and you grumble about it plenty, but you prefer it to dealing with people nine times out of ten. you’d rather leave it to one of the mechanics, who are happy to smile and ask questions and field the sort of casual condescension that comes from the men who drive up without realizing they’ll be turning over their cars to lady mechanics with their girl hands and girl tools — which really refers to all their tools, though you barely gets through a month without one of the girls huffing into the office, because it’s the break room, too, and telling you that another man has felt the need to joke about them marring his car with pink lug nuts or something — or to jeongyeon, who takes a special delight in answering honest questions and seems genuinely unbothered by the idiots who dare to doubt her.

but chaeyoung is late and momo hasn’t gotten back from flirting on that clerk and jeongyeon is, actually, you don’t want to know what jeongyeon’s up to right now, but the point is that you co-own an auto shop, and that means you have to speak to the occasional customer.

it’s a short walk, from the back office to the front of the garage, one littered with little obstacles along the way, and you’re considering throttling aecha if she keeps forgetting to recoil the air hose when she’s done with it. when you get to the front, there’s a woman standing beside her car, a mid-size black sedan of some kind.

you don’t really know the difference.

she’s on her phone, typing away with both hands beside her open door, in an impossibly sharp-looking skirt suit, all pin stripes and cleanly pressed lines. she doesn’t even look up as you approach, doesn’t slow her typing or either close or move away from her door.

you’re going to offer the cheery, but impersonal ‘hi there. how can i help you’, but the woman beats you to the punch.

“can you fit me in for an oil change in the next twenty minutes? i’m in a serious rush.”

she looks up then, this woman with long brown hair pulled back off her face and cheekbones that could probably rival momo’s, and you’re supposed to try to placate her until somebody, literally anybody, shows up for their shift.

you’re supposed to be polite and apologetic and offer her a paper cup of water or a mug of weak coffee and a seat on the guest couch in the waiting room that’s only slightly larger than the office.

instead, you get caught off guard by this woman who, if you’re being honest, is so good-looking that you sort of think she might not be real.

instead, you say, “yeah, i mean, yes. we can, uh, we can do that.”

the woman smiles then, nothing very broad or warm, just the polite smile of a person who got the answer she was looking for, but it’s still a very nice-looking smile and it makes you grin like an idiot.

“no haeun today,” the woman asks, “i think she’s done my last few oil changes.”

“nope,” you say, “she’s off.”

the woman hums somewhat thoughtfully and says, “i didn’t realize you were one of the mechanics.”

you should take the out before you embarrass yourself any further, but you already agreed to do the oil change, and so you semi-truthfully say, “i’m usually in the office.”

“yeah, i know,” the woman says, “i’ve seen you from afar a few times, just pictured you as the management type.”

she doesn’t stumble or stutter or walk back on her words, doesn’t seem particularly bothered with the implication that she’s looked on multiple occasions, into the huge windows of your office and looked you over without you ever noticing.

“no offense, of course,” the woman says quickly, “i’m sure you’re more than capable.”

“mhm,” you nod, still feeling sort of dumb. “i work here.”

“yeah, uh, you do,” the woman says, sort of laughs, even, making no sign that she knows how strange you’re behaving, “are you going to—... is that what you’re going to wear?”

“huh,” you start to ask, and then you look down and realizes you’re in your business casual office wear — because one condition you and jeongyeon agreed to when the two of you decided to open the shop was that you wouldn’t be expected to wear coveralls or anything with your name sewn on it — and say, “no, i’ll just go get into some coveralls.”

you’re walking away from the woman toward the metal container that houses the soft, but so-not-your-style one-piece jumpsuits and start stepping into one of them when you hear the woman speaking up again.

“should i pull into the garage?”

and… should she?

you don’t usually handle this, you’ve watched ryujin wave people forward for some jobs, and you’ve watched garam hop into the driver’s seat for others.”

“nope,” you decide, walking back to her, “i’ve got it, you can wait in the lobby.”

the woman nods then, short and sure, and doesn’t wait for you to open any doors like jeongyeon and the others sometimes do for customers, and then you’re alone with her car, key still in the ignition.

and… you can do this. you have, in the most desperate of moments, when jeongyeon and all of your employees were otherwise occupied, had to slowly, carefully drive a car onto a track that will suspend it in the air. you’re technically qualified in accomplishing the barest of minimums, so you’re sure you can do this. 

and… you don’t really do your own oil change, not when jeongyeon’s been doing them for years, but you know the parts. you know what things look like, more or less. you have to, for order forms and inventory crosscheck, and you sort of know where things are going.

the woman is in the lobby and the key is in the ignition and you aren’t sure why you’re doing any of this, but you’re pretty sure there’s nothing you can really fuck up with this — and you’re quietly hoping that jeongyeon’s back in time to take over — when you realize you’ve already fucked up.

the key is in the ignition, the woman is in the lobby, and, when you slip into the driver’s seat, you realize the car has a stick shift.

you’ve only ever driven automatic cars.

you don’t even know how to get the damn thing over the threshold of the garage.

“what are you doing,” a voice asks, and you snap your head up to see momo grinning at you, “and is that mine?”

“what? no,” you say, but you look down, and, sure enough, momo’s name is over your chest.

“you know, even though we call you a control freak sometimes, i don’t think any of us has ever actually thought you were going to do our job for us. or as us.”

“i’m not impersonating you,” you argue.

momo raises her eyebrows.

“fine, i kind of am. but i have a good reason,” you tell her, stealing a glance at the brunette sitting in the lobby on her phone. “and keep in mind that i sign your checks and am solely responsible for getting you reimbursed when you buy parts out of pocket.”

“pretty sure jeongyeon could sign them just as handily but explain.”

“there’s— don’t look,” you beg, “there’s a very busy woman waiting for an oil change in the lobby right now—”

of course, momo snaps her head in the woman’s direction, and connects the dots.

“ah, i see. a super-hot corporate babe needed a lube job, and after seeing that face you couldn’t turn her down.”

“don’t be gross.”

“am i wrong?”

you glare but shake your head.

“then what’s the problem? i would say you just remembered that you don’t have any of the necessary certificates for this, but somehow i don’t think that’s what’s stopping you.”

“i can’t drive a stick.”

“y/n, i know it’s been a while, but the rhythm comes—”

you sock her in the shoulder hard enough that momo winces, “my car’s an automatic. this is a manual. and she’s in a rush, momo.”

“you’re no fun these days,” momo rolls her eyes, “get out.”

“then she’s going to know—”

“that hot lady,” momo interrupts, “her name’s sana something. she comes in a few times a year, super polite, and she’s pretty much glued to her phone until we’re ready to take her credit card. she won’t notice if you aren’t the one pulling it in.”

you don’t fight it after that. you take advantage of a rare bit of sincerity from momo, and let the other woman pull the car in. then you stand at momo’s side as she does a five-minute job of changing the woman’s — sana’s — oil, and listen seriously while momo explains what she’s doing, and more attentively than any of the times when jeongyeon tried to explain it. 

you only check over your shoulder once, to see whether the woman has looked up to notice that momo’s doing all the work.

by the time momo pulls the car back out, chaeyoung has shown up, and jeongyeon’s back, too, and you’re not excited for both of them to know how embarrassing you’ve been in the last ten minutes. you consider yourself lucky when jeongyeon autopilots back to the office and chaeyoung busies herself near the batteries.

“keys,” momo says, dropping them in your palm, “just be normal, okaya? she’s a good customer, and she probably hasn’t even noticed how fucking strange you’ve been.”

“you’re probably right,” you say.

“almost always,” momo tells you, as you start to back away, “but, for real, don’t be any weirder. no drooling or crying.”

“noted,” you say, rolling your eyes.

“and don’t forget, if your hands touch when she gives you her card, don’t be creepy and weepy eyed over it. works in the movies, not so much in real life.”

“i hate you.”

“and don’t forget to charge her,” momo laughs, “no discounts, either. the woman who does our books is kind of a bitch about it.”

“good luck on your next paycheck,” you tell her.

“you’re welcome,” momo says just as you get to the lobby door.

the brunette looks up then, as you walk in the door, and she has an odd expression that you can’t place.

“you’re good to go,” you say, getting behind the register, “i just have to ring you up.”

the woman gets out of her chair, pockets her phone, and stands on the other side of the register, reaching into her bag for her card.

silence stretches between you both for a few long seconds, and you aren’t going to try to stop it, not when you’ve only just barely avoided embarrassment, but the brunette breaks it.

the itemized receipt is printed when the brunette asks, “so… are you new to this whole mechanic thing, or…”

“i,” you start, gearing up to dig yourself further into this lie that you had no reason to tell, but this woman is a regular, and she’s seen you before, and she’ll probably notice if you never work on another car again, “you were right earlier. i’m more the management type.”

“yeah,” sana says, and she lets out this short burst of laughter, “i gathered, by the way you hovered over momo’s shoulder while she changed my oil.”

“You saw that, then?”

“yeah…” sana says looking down at the paper you slide her way and handing over her card. your hands don’t touch, and you don’t even cry or drool or whatever. “you’re the management type, and i’m the observant type.”

the brunette smiles then, and you smile back.

“is there a reason why you tried to convince me you were going to change my oil when, by the looks of it, you couldn’t get inside?”

you stutter out your laughter. it dies when you catch sight of momo and chaeyoung, side-by-side watching through the window.

“observant seems like an understatement,” you say, impressed.

“and that statement seems like a way to avoid answering my question,” sana smirks.

“yes.”

“yes?”

“yes,” you say again, and now jeongyeon is against the window, standing back just far enough that sana wouldn’t know she was there if your eyes didn’t bug out at the heart shape jeongyeon was making with her hands through the window. “there’s a reason.”

sana turns in time to see jeongyeon, just hovering, practically attached to the glass, but luckily a second too late to see the heart. she looks back at you quizzically, narrows her eyes for a second, but not in a threatening way.

it makes you feel even more exposed than a gorgeous woman knowing you can’t drive a stick or do an oil change.

you hand sana her card, spinning the printed receipt around for her to sign, and passing her a pen.

“any chance you’ll tell me the reason today?”

“probably not,” you say, “it’s kind of embarrassing.”

sana looks at you again, brown eyes boring into yours, and the woman seems to come to some understanding.

“maybe next time,” is what she says to you and your mind goes to the months that span between oil changes, but then sana adds, and in a quiet somewhat less sure voice, “i should probably get my tires rotated soon. any chance you want to pretend to do that, too? maybe thursday afternoon?”

“i usually take thursday off,” you say.

“friday then?”

“friday works,” you smile. “and i know even less about tires.”

“in that case, we can leave it to the professionals, and you can tell me more about this mysterious reason.”

“i’ll pencil you into my schedule,” you say.

“sounds like a plan, momo.”

you grimace, “y/n, actually. these aren’t my clothes.”

“y/n,” sana says, and then she holds out her hand for you to shake, “i like that even better. i’m sana.”

your hands are touching then, you’re gripping firmly onto sana’s, and you’re trying not to be all gross and romcom-y when it occurs to you that you should ask, “is there a reason why you let me pretend i could work on your car even when you clearly knew i couldn’t?”

sana still hasn’t let go of your hand when she says, “yeah, there’s a reason.”

you think that’s all you’re going to get out of sana, that the woman in the pressed skirt suit who’s probably already spent too much time in the shop will be as coy as you’ve been, but the brunette surprises you.

the two of you aren’t shaking hands as much as holding hands when sana admits, “the gorgeous woman i’ve been seeing from afar for months finally spoke to me, so i figured i’d let her do whatever she wanted.”

#kpop x reader #kpop imagines #twice x reader #twice imagines #twice sana x reader #twice sana imagines #minatoazki sana x reader #minatozaki sana imagines #sana x reader #sana imagines #girl group imagines #gxg imagines #kpop #twice #twice sana #minatozaki sana #sana #girl group #gxg

[6rookie-writer0110]

Never mind the odds

Hailee Steinfeld x male reader

Request: Hailee Steinfeld x male reader. Can you do one where the reader is a super cute boyfriend, like he brings her food when she’s on set and is just an amazing boyfriend in general, but he is also really hot and protective, so when she was filming coast he saw a guy talking about her body and checking her out and she was really uncomfortable so he steps up and scares the guy and takes him away, but he comes back to comfort her and he just stays on set till the end of the day to take her home?

You finished face time with your girlfriend, and she is feeling stressed out. You drive to buy her favorite food and iced coffee, then you drive to the studio. You don't tell her that you are going because you want to surprise her. You went to the set with the food and drink, she saw you before you saw her. Hailee starts to smile and walks toward you

“Y/n, you came” Hailee smiled.

She gave you a peck on the lips.

“I figured you must be hungry, so I got food for you,” You said.

“Oh, you remember the iced coffee I like” Hailee smiled.

“Yeah, I have the receipt saved. You should eat, because I know you would skip lunch” You said.

“You came in just in because it's time for lunch and I didn't eat breakfast, I didn't have time,” Hailee said.

You and Hailee sit down, and she starts to eat the food you got for her. You start to ask about her day and you listen to her, then she asked what you have been doing.

“Oh, Y/n try this” Hailee smiled.

She feeds you the chicken pasta it has a new sauce on it. You start to eat it and she waits for your response.

“What do you think?” Hailee asked.

“I like it,” You said.

While she is eating her lunch, you can hear two guys talking about her. You don't like what they are saying and you noticed that she is uncomfortable. Her mood changed and she stopped eating.

“She is so hot. I want to have my way with her” He said.

“Same. She won't say no to us and she has a hot ass” His friend said.

They continued to talk about her, then you stood up and walked toward them. You grabbed the guy’s shirt and you start to glare at him.

“Don’t talk about her like that or I will break every bone in your body, I won't hesitate” You said.

“I won't talk about her,” He said.

“Good. Don't go near her” You said.

You let go and went sit next to her again, you just smiled at her. The guys moved away and you gently hold her hand. You decided to stay on set all day, to make sure no one else would bother her. But you and Hailee did take a nap in her trailer, she is always the little spoon.

----

You noticed that Hailee isn't happy and went to lie on the bed. She has on your shirt and you sit next to her.

“Why are your shirts so comfortable to wear?” Hailee asked.

“I don't know. But I have noticed half of my pajama shirts are gone” You said.

She takes your shirts when she travels for work.

“There is no chocolate and I'm on my period” Hailee sighed.

“Oh that's why you are grumpy,” You said.

She smacked your leg.

“What was that for?” You asked.

“I’m not grumpy,” Hailee said.

You kissed her head and you put a blanket on her. You leave and went to the store, you get chocolate, iced coffee, and some snacks then went home.

“I got chocolate for you,” You said.

“You are the best boyfriend, Y/n!” Hailee smiled.

She pulled you close to her and she starts to kiss you. She ate some of the chocolate. You are lying on your back and she snuggled on you. You have your arm around her and she has her leg on top of you. A few minutes later, she fell asleep on you and you don't move or say anything to her. You closed your eyes

✫ ✫ ✫ ✫

Hailee was away filming and it's been weeks since you two saw each other. You went to the airport and you are holding flowers for her, you can't wait to see her. Hailee is on the escalator and she saw you, she starts to smile. Once she got off the escalator she rushed towards you. She jumped on you and you are holding her tight.

“I missed you!” Hailee said.

“I missed you too, babe,” You said.

She starts to kiss you and you are smiling.

“The flowers are for you,” You said between kisses.

“Thanks, babe. Let's go home” Hailee smiled.

You gently put her down and she grabbed the flowers. You get her luggage and she follows you to the car.

She was taking a shower and she has on your shirt. You are in the kitchen making her something to eat, and she walks into the kitchen and wrapped her arms around you from behind.

“It’s almost done,” You said.

She doesn't let go of you. You turned off the stove and then turned around, now you have your arms around her.

“I thought since I have time off, maybe we can go away on a trip,” Hailee said.

“It has been a while since we got away. Where should we go?” You said.

“I don't know, yet. Maybe we talk about it while we eat?” Hailee said.

You kiss her on the lips and she starts to smile.

“Yeah,” You said.

You and Hailee sat down and start to eat while talking about the trip.

---

You and Hailee are at a basketball game, sitting courtside. The kiss cam went on you two, then she kissed you on the lips. Some of her red lipstick is on your lips and you are just smiling. Then you put your arm around her and you take a drink from your cup.

#hailee steinfeld imagine #hailee steinfeld x reader #Hailee Steinfeld x male reader #x male reader #male!reader #male reader

[just-wrting]

Perhaps a Little Jealous

Title: Perhaps a Little Jealous

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x Read

Summary: After gifting Hotch a new sweater, you use it to your advantage to keep other women away. Unfortunately, this doesn’t go unnoticed.

Word Count: 1817

Master List

A/N: My first actual post in forever and it’s not Supernatural. I think having to keep this blog Supernatural related got to me and I just kinda neglected it. I think opening up requests for a multitude of fandoms will help my creativity! Anyway, enjoy some of my current obsession: Criminal Minds’ Aaron Hotchner!

Part 2

Knocking on Hotch’s office door, you smooth out your shirt. Granted, you didn’t have to give Hotch a gift, but you feel obligated to give him something. He had prevented you from getting injured, or worse killed. So in an effort to say thanks, you had gotten him a gift.

“Yes?”

Hotch’s office door swings open and you look at him sheepishly. “I wanted to give you a gift. To say thanks for saving me on the last case. Can I come in?”

Hotch steps aside to let you in. You make your way over to his desk and stand next to the guest chair. You can’t bear to face him due to your face being so red. You know why you are nervous. You just don’t want to admit it.

“You got me a gift? For doing my job?” Hotch makes his way to his desk. “I don’t think this is necessary.”

You glance up to look into his eyes before looking away. You had magically found an excuse to give him a gift, but you are scared to tell him the real reason. You are giving him a gift cause it was a way that you showed you loved someone. Well in this case have feelings for.

“I think it's just a nice thing to do.” You are quick to answer. “You’ve done so much for me since I started at the BAU and not to mention you did save me on the last case.”

Hotch looks like he might ask more, but he graciously holds his hand out for the gift instead. “(Y/N), you’re a member of the team. I was just doing what I would do for any of the others.”

Your heart sinks a little. Of course, Hotch would say something like that. At the end of the day, he is your boss. Hotch is someone you should never have developed feelings for. Yet here you are. Standing in his office, handing him a gift, and almost hoping that he would read into and figure you out.

“Still. It’s just something I like to do for people I care about or like. Like I gave Garcia some coupons I had found for a brand that matches her style.”

You watch as Hotch pulls the ribbon off of the gift. You are nervous. Your heart is pounding. If Hotch took one good look at you, you know that he would be able to pick you apart and say the words you were thinking.

“Coupons and a gift you went out and bought are two different things, (Y/N). Besides, this,” he pulls the sweater out of the box, “looks like it cost you more than some coupons.”

“Hotch, if it bothers you, I can take it back. I just thought that having something comfortable while on a case or that you can use to stay warm in the hotels would be nice. I’m sure I got your size right, but if I didn’t there is a gift receipt in the box.”

Hotch checks the tag and shakes out the sweater. You know it was his style, the quarter-zip, and his color, a wine red. You are almost one hundred percent sure that you had gotten his size, a large, though you’re sure that even if it isn’t the right size he’d still look good. The only thing you didn’t know was whether or not he would like it.

“This is,” Hotch pauses while feeling the material, “very soft. Where did you get this? Actually, if you don’t mind me asking, how much was it?” You give him a smile as someone knocks on the door. “Looks like J.J. was right. There’s always a new case almost right after the last.”

—

It’s the morning of the third day on this case and weirdly enough, you are starving. Normally you get up too late to actually grab breakfast or anything, but today you woke up right as the hotel started putting breakfast out.

Hotch had told you all to make sure you got enough rest last night and to be one hundred percent ready to tackle the case this morning. This meant that you were allowed to get almost eight hours of sleep, closer to seven but who was really counting, and you were allowed to have more than a cup of coffee and a stale muffin for breakfast.

Not only are you right on time, but you also are surprised to see Hotch standing in line for the coffee maker. The new quarter-zip looks very nice on him and you realize that you weren’t the only one who noticed. A pair of women sit at the window, eyeing him from over their teas.

“Hotch!” You speed up your steps. “You should've had me grab you breakfast.”

You step as close as you think you can without getting in his way. The zipper of his sweater going at a diagonal angle makes you want to laugh. Knowing how motivated he is to finish cases, you figure he probably stayed up late and slept in it.

“Your thing, uh zipper, it’s crooked. Here let me fix it for you. Did you end up sleeping in this?”

Your hand grasps the collar of the sweater and gently adjusts it. Smoothing out the fabric, you give Hotch a soft smile. You like that he was wearing the sweater you got him. You didn’t like the fact that other women seem like they wanted to flirt with him.

“You can tell that I didn’t follow my own orders, can’t you?” Hotch asks as he puts a lid on his coffee.

You giggle. “Oh yes. Though if you were up all night looking at the files maybe you magically found something new.”

He hands you your own coffee and walks you toward the ever-wonderful selection of the hotel buffet. “I did see a few things. They could mean nothing, but without a second opinion, I’m unsure. Do you mind if I join you for breakfast and share them?”

You stand there in shock. Is he asking you to have breakfast with him? Not just the whole team? Could it actually just be so he could tell you to not invade his personal space again?

“Uh yeah! My room is super close, J.J. got me the room closest to the front door so that way when I’m running late I’m faster. Is that fine?”

He gives you a quick nod before grabbing some toast. Thankfully he doesn’t leave your side, or make any comments, as you load up your plate. He doesn’t even complain when you toss both a yogurt and a muffin on his plate.

The two of you are silent as you walk what was probably only a minute to your room, but feels like ages to you. You are nervous, not only are you still in pajamas, not even like the ones on television you are wearing the silly cat meme shirt, but you are going to have Aaron Hotchner in your hotel room.

“Sorry about the mess. The only person who usually comes in, well besides the staff, is Emily or J.J. Sometimes Morgan if he thinks I need further teasing. If I’m not treating it like it’s my room I just can’t think right.”

Hotch makes no comment. He instead opts to pull the chair from the desk and offer it to you. You shake your head and pull out the stool. “Actually, I’ll let the boss sit in the fancy chair. I can use the footrest as a seat.”

Hotch lets out a chuckle as he sits down. “The probably cheap office chair is fancy to you?”

You lower the chunk of waffle from your face. “As fancy as a cheap office chair can be. What did you notice?”

Hotch folds his hands on the table. “You paused after saying my name in the lobby. Almost as if you regretted it or noticed something else. When you came up to me you stood closer than you usually did and took your time making sure I was presentable.”

Swallowing hard, you look into his eyes. “Oh. Is this what you meant by opinions to share?”

You think you see a smile on his face as he continues, “You made sure that you put extra food on my plate like you were looking out for me. All of this would leave an impression on others that we’re close. And given the fact that hotels are usually couples or families on vacation this impression would be that we are together.”

You rub your arm and look away. Who said he could look so handsome while profiling your feelings? Just cause he was good at his job doesn’t mean you wanted to be the target.

“You saw the same women sitting near the window that I did, didn’t you? What made you give them the wrong impression?”

You know if you looked at him you’d give everything away even if you lied. “There’s no need for women to be taking up your time. We are on a case. Just because you won’t entertain them, doesn’t mean they won't waste time.”

“You’re very easy to read. When you feel like you can’t control your emotions, you look away. So I know that you’re hiding something or you’re lying to me.”

You know your face is red. You can’t do anything about that. Instead, you turn and face Hotch.

“The team can’t have women taking up time that could be spent working the case.”

Hotch’s smile wavers. “I know you’re lying to me. If that was truly the reason, your face wouldn’t be so flushed. Would you like to know what I think?”

You lick your lips and nod. “If you think you can read me that well then go ahead Hotch. Surprise me.”

This time he leans in. You would worry about the food and coffee spilling but you can’t focus that well with Hotch’s face only a foot away from yours.

“I think that you saw those women watching me and got jealous. Perhaps you got just a little bit,” he pauses and you know the word he’s thinking of, “possessive? You wanted to scare them off and make them think I was taken.”

“What would you do if that was the reason?” You hold your breath. “Would you tell me off?”

Glancing at the clock behind you, Hotch gives a smile. He stands up and leans down to whisper in your ear.

“Perhaps after the case is over we can go and get breakfast. Someplace that isn’t your hotel room. Let me know if that works for you, (Y/N).”

With that, Hotch leaves your room. You’re a flustered mess due to his teasing. You never even knew that Hotch could tease. Your ear still feels warm from where he whispered and you do your best to calm down.

#criminal minds #criminal minds aaron hotchner #aaron hotchner #aaron hotch x reader #aaron hotch fic #aaron hotch x you #aaron hotch imagine #aaron hotch #criminal minds aaron hotch #aaron hotch fluff #im back baby #reader insert #criminal minds x reader

[vanwritesfan-fiction]

How Much?!?!

Im wide awake so I’m posting a quick blurb on this really funny TikTok trend I’ve been seeing. I feel like Jack would freak out 🤭

“Baby, can you help me with my hair?” Jack walked into the nursery, fresh out of the shower, his curls still wet. He took a sip from the can of Phocus in his hand. You looked behind you as you propped your phone up on the dresser. “Yes, I just need five minutes to film this TikTok video.”

You pressed record, backing up so your belly was in view as you stood next to a stroller. “Hey guys, it’s Y/N. I am officially eight months pregnant today so I thought I would show you guys some of the things we got for baby girl and her nursery.”

Jack walked out of frame, standing in the doorway, watching you as you recorded.

“The thing I’m most excited about is this $20,000 stroller that I picked out.“

“$20K?!?” Jack choked on his drink as he registered the price, sending him into a coughing fit. “Can you repeat that price again? I don’t think I heard you right.”

“Jack, I’m trying to record a video.” You rolled your eyes, pretending to be annoyed at his interruption, before turning back to the camera. You hadn’t even spent close to that amount on the stroller, but you loved to see his blood pressure rise when you pranked him.

“I don’t care. What the hell is so special about that stroller that it costs that much money?” His voice raised an octave and you could see his face start to flush red with anger.

“Well, it has leather and you can change the seat so you can use it as the baby gets older. It’s really an investment piece.” You cleared your throat in hopes of stifling your laughter.

“At that price it better raise the baby too! We can save money on a nanny.” Jack tan his fingers through his hair, trying to calm his breathing. “Why did you spend that much money on a stroller?”

“I’m sorry, it just really made me happy. I’ve been through so much, carrying your baby for the last eight months”, you sniffled, turning on the water works.

Jack’s face softened as he saw you grow upset. “Ok, don’t cry. If it makes you happy, then I don’t care what the price is.” He swallowed, hoping that he was convincing.

“Thank you, baby.” You puckered your lips, giving him a quick kiss.

“It really is a nice stroller.” Jack admitted, not sure if it was to reassure you or himself. “Everyone go out and buy Phocus, it’s going to fund my wife’s shopping habits.” Jack let out a humorless laugh, turning the can in front of the camera so the brand name was revealed.

“Ok, that’s enough. It was a joke, Jack.” He looked at you with narrowed eyes, not sure if he should believe you. “I can show you the receipt, I would never spend that much money on a stroller.” You chuckled, rubbing your belly.

“Not funny, mama. You know I don’t like saying no to you, but $20K is ridiculous for a stroller.” He walked over to you, pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“I know. I’m sorry. Like I said, I would never spend that much money on a stroller. Now $30K for this crib, that was worth every penny.” You giggled as Jack spit out his drink across the room.

#jack harlow #jackman thomas harlow #jackharlow #jack harlow x reader #jackman harlow #jack harlow concepts #jack harlow imagine #jack harlow fluff #jack harlow fanfic

[shimishimii]

rich ginger, eight figure, that's my type

⟿ wc; 407

⟿ Childe x gn reader ; fluff

⟿ my hc is Childe's great at making money but not at managing it, when you tell him he's like a sugar daddy, he takes it as a compliment

good thing Childe has a lot of money, because he’s bad at keeping them.

“If this goes there or that goes this”

“What? ….whaaaaaat????” childe complains, grabbing the notebook. “where did these numbers come from???”

There’s a quiz in accounting tomorrow and if he is on the way to failing, well he might, if you weren’t there for him.

“wasn’t it add and subtract only?” he scans the pages, wondering where’d all these problems came from. He already has a lot, why would they add more?

“Yes, but with letters and lot more tweaks”

“Why do even people put letters with numbers?” Childe gives up.

“You obviously didn’t listen to the introduction during lectures” you say with a light chuckle and Childe could just kiss your right now if he does not need to break these cryptic math conundrums, which you call word problems.

He complains, “the calculator can do it for me,” his confidence is unfazed since he passed the previous term relying on his instinct and sheer luck.

“Unfortunately, because of your financial decisions, I am doing it for you,” you reply “go on and thank the calculator, not your partner keeping your bank account sane” you took his notebook from him and gave a sarcastic smile.

Truthfully, he really doesn’t count his money, expenses do not seem to matter to him. During your first month of dating, you were baffled why he is not getting broke. Childe would even go off swiping his card left and right.

‘Money can’t buy happiness, but at least I can buy the things that makes you happy, which makes me happy too’, that’s what he says.

Thankfully, you are there, reminding him to spend wisely as much as you can. You tell him to pay attention to his financial management while keeping track of receipts during dates and making sure nothing goes off past his savings.

Honestly, Childe is actually wary of his expenses, and amazingly proficient with stock market. He makes sure he gets decent earning.

Besides, how could he not help himself spend a little more than the ‘20%’ rule when he sees your eyes light up at some plushie? or when you ramble how you want to get a certain character but gacha system sucks? or that new shade of lipbalm you want to try?

Surely, a good boyfriend should do something right? Wait until you hear a new bank account he opened and filled just for you.

#genshin x reader #genshin fluff #genshin x you #childe x reader #childe x you #childe fluff #genshin scenarios #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact imagines #genshin x gn reader #childe x gn reader #keybored

[velvetcloxds]

Looking for somebody =

+ could you pls make the reader chubby cus am chubby girl and it would be a comfort for me after today 😅❤ but only if you want to ofc anyways i hope you had a good day ♡♡<3

A FEW CENTURIES | C.C.

word count: 0.7k

warnings: chubby!reader, not specified anywhere but it's chubby-reader-friendly as always, I also have not read the vampire diaries books, just watched the show

summary: carlisle and edward find your obsession with the vampire diaries books a little ridiculous, especially when you've got your own house of vampires right there in the real world

It was a dangerous thing, reading around Edward, whatever you were reading was bound to count as entertainment for him as well, even if he was busing himself with his own thing which he always was. Lately, you'd been getting into a silly little series of books you'd been gifted as a joke at first, the writing wasn't really something to rave about but the characters had stolen your interest and you were deadset on finishing the whole series despite the mind reader's distain.

"Edward, I can't focus with all that ruckus," you noted with an overly dramatic sigh, expecting that very look to rest on his face as he caught you telling him off for doing something in his own home. He lifted his hands from the ivory keys of the piano with a sigh of his own. "Must you play while I'm reading?" you huffed and stuffed the faded receipt into your book to hold your place.

"Must you read while I'm playing?" he demanded in return and you heard the softest scoff from the kitchen where Carlisle was making you dinner, his favorite pastime as of late, making the most of his fancy kitchen on your behalf.

"Carlisle, your son is being insufferable," you noted with a delicate smirk, tilting your head back to see a similar look on his face as he met your gaze. "His irritation with my book has turned to actual sabotage."

"You truly think I spend my days planning ways to disrupt your reading?" Edward played a few notes, it wasn't half as bad as you'd expect from your words but it was untimely. How were you to focus on the current villain taking his shot to kill Elena if you were distracted by Edward's rendition of Mozart? "Burning those books of yours would take up much less of my time, this-" he pushed down onto a lower key, humming at the sound and chuckling lightly at your frown. "This is merely to help me endure it."

"You know, you may look like a teenager, Edward, but you can't hide the fact that you're really just a bitter old man," you informed him, and when he chuckled you did too, wanting to get back to your book. Still, you weren't all that bothered that you couldn't when Carlisle sat down on the couch next to you, giving the two of you a familiar look before taking the book from your hands and scanning the page.

"Bitter old men, she says," he mused, very perfectly landed on a page where Elena was stuck right in the middle of some vampire crisis having to be saved by a vampire named Damon who by the looks of it seemed more popular for his appearance than his actions based on Elena's reaction which didn't at all match her description of him. "Seems you have a type," he concluded and was sure to take note of the page you were on before closing the book and chucking it onto the coffee table.

"You jealous, my love?" you teased and he was happy to play along if it meant you'd draw closer to him, leaning onto his chest and brushing a hand around his neck.

"Should I be?" he furrowed his brows in mock concern, shamelessly dragging a hand to cup your waist, the other lifting your palm to steal a kiss, at the ever-disgusted expense of Edward who had gone back to playing as loud as he could.

"Never," you replied earnestly, kissing the tip of his nose before brushing against it with your own. "You're the only dead man I have eyes for," he pinched your waist at that, leaning in for a kiss of his own satisfaction only pleased when you smiled against his lips to end it. "Plus," you hummed, tugging lightly at the hair settled in the nape of his neck to keep his focus. "He's far too young for my liking, you got a good two or three centuries on him."

"Watch it, trouble," he laughed, smacking lightly at your behind when you jumped off him to taste whatever he'd concocted for your dinner.

#carlisle cullen #carlisle x reader #carlisle cullen x reader #carlisle cullen x you #carlisle cullen x yn #carlisle cullen x y/n #carlisle cullen fluff #carlisle cullen imagine #carlisle cullen blurb #carlisle cullen drabble #carlisle cullen fanfiction #carlisle cullen fanfic #carlisle cullen fic #monique's writing event days #monique's event days

[heavyhitterheaux]

Cold Water

First Lady of Private Garden Fic

AN: best friends should always be honest with each other

Synopsis: You and your best friend are at odds when you learn that he kept his new girlfriend a secret from you on purpose

Pairing: Husband!Jack Harlow x Wife!Reader

Requested by: @fallon-carrington123 (I incorporated the first part of your request. Part 2 is where I’ll add the rest!)

Please Do Not Repost My Content Anywhere

Read My Superstar first 

It had been maybe a week or so since you learned the news of Urban having a girlfriend for two months over an instagram post. Safe to say that you were hurt because he didn’t tell you and it didn’t seem as if he was going to mention it until he got caught.

You and Urban have been close since the time the two of you were 14 when you both met and you simply shared everything with him. Even if it had to do with your beloved husband.

You know had a three week break from tour and you were back at home with Jack and Urban. However, the tension in the house was at an all time high because you had been giving Urban the silent treatment. The rest of PG were also there and you were all sitting around having a movie marathon and eating some homemade pizza that you had made for them.

PG didn’t want to say anything regarding you and Urban and figured that the two of you would work it out yourselves.

You two literally couldn’t live without the other so they knew you would make up soon.

You got up to go into the kitchen to refill your lemonade when Urban walked in to confront you.

He was over you ignoring him and wanted to fix this or at least attempt to.

“This shit stops right now. We need to talk about this.” You heard him say from behind you as you were finishing pouring the lemonade in your cup. You rolled your eyes before turning around to look at him.

“You lied to me! We have been friends for ten years! I have never lied to you about anything or kept something from you because guess what? You’re my best friend and best friends don’t do that!”

“You want to know why I didn’t tell you? Honestly?”

“I’m all ears, Wyatt. The fact that you told the rest of them before me and they met her? You even told Neelam before me! Like what the actual fuck?”

“BECAUSE YOU HAVE LITERALLY RUINED EVERY SINGLE RELATIONSHIP THAT I’VE BEEN IN!”

“What?!? No, I haven't Urban! That is complete bullshit!”

“You sure about that? Let me pull the receipts.”

“Is it my fault that no one that you’ve dated has been good enough for you!? My best friend deserves the best!”

“How can I find that if you keep running them off?!”

“Urban, Jessica was rude as hell every time we went out and didn’t give two shits about her attitude. The way she would speak to people was insane.”

“Damn, sounds like you’re talking about yourself. I’m going to need for you to stop being a hypocrite.”

“Urb! I am not rude! I never have been!”

“But your attitude could use some work! You never see the fault in what you do! EVER!”

“THAT IS NOT TRUE! What about Reina?! She dated you only to become closer to Jack and I don’t know why that was her goal simply because he’s married to me! She wasn’t thinking about you! She did not have your best interest!”

“But you didn’t have to fight her either! Let’s not forget the girls you ran off because of how you act and the fact that they didn’t get your approval! It’s like they see how you are and run for the hills!”

“You’re my best friend and I am always going to protect you!”

“You can do that without constantly being on my ass all the time, Y/N! Like damn let me breathe! Last time I checked I was a grown ass man who could take care of himself!”

“But….”

And that’s when the tears started to fall.

Meanwhile PG was standing to the side of the doorway out of both of your line of vision  listening to the heated exchange happening between you and Urban.

“Uhh, Jack? Maybe you should intervene.” 2fo said while looking over at him.

“Absolutely not. They need to work this out themselves. I can’t always run and save the day every time she has a disagreement with someone. She’s an adult. Now if anything disrespectful was said that’s a different story.”

“But, Urb is kinda making some valid points. She is very protective of all of us but especially him.” Shloob confessed with car keys in hand just in case he had to make a quick exit.

“True, like sometimes I don’t say certain things around her because I don’t know how she’s going to react.”

“We all know that she doesn’t tolerate bullshit and only wants the best for us.”

“Yeah, but like Urb said she has to let us breathe and not be on our backs all the time.”

“Urban! Why can’t you see how much I care about you?!”

“I do and I’m going to need for you to stop crying because you are always playing the victim and I’m tired of it. Any time someone says something you don’t like or they’re telling you about yourself you get upset and cry. Grow the fuck up. Don’t you think I eventually want what you and Jack have? How am I supposed to do that if you literally run off every girl that I show interest in?”

All you did was simply look at him speechless with tears rolling down your face.

Your intentions were always pure when it came to Urban or anybody in PG who had gotten a girlfriend. You wanted for them to be on the same level as them and not settle for less.

Your feelings were hurt to think that Urban believed that you would intentionally do that to him.

All you wanted was to see your best friend happy. 

“Then I’m sorry for caring and loving my best friend and wanting for him to have what he deserves. You won’t have to worry about me doing that anymore.”

“Wait, Y/N….”

Urban tried to catch your hand as you walked past him but you quickly snatched away from him. PG scrambled to go back to their places on the couches in the living room but you knew that they had been listening.

Jack saw your face full of tears and was now kind of annoyed with Urban for making you cry even if he had been right.

“Baby…”

“I.. just need a minute.”

You went upstairs and simply laid down and cried at what just happened.

The two of you had never argued or gotten into disagreements the entire ten years that you had been friends.

This hurt and it was never your intention to keep Urban from finding someone to be with.

But if he felt that you weren't doing any good by hovering over him, consider it done.

You just wanted to make sure that it was someone who wanted Urban for him and not anything else. 

Why couldn’t he understand that?

It had been about another week or so since the huge blow up between you and Urban and it was safe to say that the silent treatment was continuing. 

Well you couldn’t exactly call it that seeing as if he asked you something, you did answer him but simply left it at that.

To avoid all of this Urban had been spending more time with Yasmin who you still had yet to meet.

You figured it would happen eventually, but you weren't in any rush since he told you that you had ruined every relationship that he had been in previously so you continued to keep your distance.

It was around 11 am when PG decided that they wanted to go play laser tag and wanted for you to join them.

“Y/N, I need you on my team because you're little and you can hide and do sneak attacks.” Ace said but you kept a neutral face.

“No, I’m already doing something.”

“Wait, what? You’ve been dodging us all week! Come with us!”

"If I wasn't already doing something, I would."

"Well if we get dinner later are you coming?"

You simply shrugged.

"If I get finished maybe but I don't know." You honestly answered before going back upstairs and getting ready to meet Megan in the studio.

You had written a song for her to put on her new album and wanted to record it today in the hopes of getting your mind off everything else.

Once you were out of earshot everyone turned towards Urban.

"Will you two make up already!? And you can tell she's upset!"

"I tried to explain why I did it but of course she doesn't see anything wrong in what she did."

"Urb, you know how she is. You more so than anyone else besides Jack."

"Just because I know how she is doesn't make it right. She's upset because I told her the truth and I also kind of told her to back off a little bit and stop hovering."

"Well damn. That's why she hasn't wanted to go out with us."

"I meant to stop hovering around me when it came to relationships, not hanging out with us in general."

You knew it would be awkward with both you and Urban there and you didn't want to add more fuel to the fire.

"Jack, fix this! I miss her cooking for all of us. Now she's all sad and shit and making us eat take out. I swear that I can’t eat another egg roll."

"It's not my problem to fix. It's between them. Urb does the same thing when me and her have disagreements. He remains neutral and that’s what I’m doing."

"Now you know how stubborn your wife is, she is not going to apologize first."

"I think that the both of you need to apologize. You for keeping Yasmin from her and she does too for running the girlfriends off in the past even if her intentions behind it were good.." Jack said being completely honest.

"But why am I apologizing if I'm not sorry? I guarantee that if I would have told her about Yasmin that we wouldn’t still be together because of how she is."

"Urb, just do it so we can get fed! We're about to turn to skin and bones around here!"

"Shloob, you're just scared that she'll pop off."

"Well she has been quiet all week. Maybe she's plotting something. First Lady is never quiet. Jack, just make sure you give the eulogy at Urb's funeral."

Jack took the steps two at a time to go and check on you. It definitely made him feel some type of way seeing his wife so sad, so he was trying to do his best to take your mind off of it. But, he knew the two of you couldn’t live without each other even if both of you were acting like dumbasses and not trying to fix the issue.

He found you sitting on the bed and scrolling through your phone with your shoes near you assuming that you were getting ready to leave.

"Babe?"

"Yes?"

"Now you know I'm staying neutral because the last thing I want to do is come between you two and pick sides but the two of you really need to fix this."

"I'm doing what he asked me to do. So I'm keeping my distance."

"That's not what he meant and you know it." Jack replied while coming to sit down next to you and pull you onto his lap.

"Well that's what it sounded like to me. Because apparently I ruin everything and run people off."

"Baby girl. I get that you're in your feelings because he kept it from you. However, he has a point as to why."

"Not you too." You muttered while rolling your eyes and crossing your arms.

"I wouldn't be a good husband if I wasn't honest with my wife."

"I just… from what I saw from my perspective, none of them had his best interest and obviously in my mind I don't think anyone is good enough for my best friend. What's wrong with wanting to protect him from getting his heart broken?"

"Nothing at all but sometimes people need to learn on their own. You have to allow him to make mistakes. I feel like we're talking about our kid in a way." Jack said before laughing and it made you form a small smile on your face.

“That’s why I’m keeping my distance.”

“No, you need to find a good balance. This is such a thing as caring too much and you kind of take it overboard when it comes to Urban.”

“I just…. It really hurt what he said.”

“But there wasn’t any ill intent behind it, baby girl. Urban is hurt too. Don’t you think he wanted you to be the first person he told about Yasmin?”

“I thought he would do that regardless but, I… I don’t really want to talk about this anymore.”

“Baby, just think about it from his point of view, okay?”

“I’ll try.”

“Now where are you off to? You need to stop avoiding us.”

“I’m not avoiding anybody. I’m about to go spend time with Meg in the studio. I wrote something for her and we want to record it.”

“Fine, but this weekend you’re spending time with us too. I invited Yasmin over to formally meet you.”

“No thanks, I’m busy.”

“Baby! Stop doing that. Will you at least try for Urban?”

“Nope.”

“Okay, fine. Try for me.”

“Maybe.”

“You didn’t say no so I’ll take it.”

You and Megan had just finished recording Budget and the two of you were just sitting around talking when the topic of Urban and Yasmin was brought up.

“Have you met her yet?”

“Nope and apparently I am this weekend because that husband of mine invited her over. I just can’t believe he literally lied to my face.”

“Well…. You kind of take it to the extreme when it comes to PG.”

“How so?”

“You are extremely protective and territorial over them. I know that they say no one gets to the first lady except through them but no one gets to the members of PG without going through the first lady. It goes both ways.”

“They’re my friends! I obviously want to protect them as much as I can!”

“Okay, you can do that without being a helicopter mom. Because that is definitely you.”

“I am not!”

“Listen to me for a second. I have heard a few of them say that certain things they don’t say in front of you because they don’t know how you’re going to react and they do keep things from you to not cause tension.”

“That makes me feel like I’m a horrible person. I want them to always be able to come to me about things and not have to hide.”

“You aren’t. You just have to allow yourself to have an open mind when it comes to things. I’m sure that they want to share a lot of things with you but they don’t because of your uhh… track record.”

“The only time I fight is if I have a good reason.”

“And I wholeheartedly believe you! However, there’s a time and place for everything so come whenever you meet her, go in there with an open mind and talk to Urban. Because even though you’re hurting, he probably is too.”

“Jack said the same thing.”

“It’ll all work out in the end, I promise. It’ll be like this entire thing never even happened.”

The weekend was now finally here and as promised for Jack and for Jack only you were playing host to Yasmin.

Everyone was sitting around the firepit in the backyard holding simple conversations and getting to know her while you had simply remained quiet.

You had a feeling that anything you said was going to piss Urban off so instead of causing tension, you decided that remaining quiet was the best option. 

There you were sitting on Jack’s lap and sipping on your red wine when you suddenly heard Yasmin call out to you.

“Hmm?”

“That pasta you made was really good. How’d you learn to cook so well? Did your mom or someone else teach you?”

“My mom did.” You kept your answer simple and noticed how Urban had rolled his eyes at your response, but you ignored it.

“Is there any dish that’s your favorite to make? Or only make on special occasions?”

“I don’t really have one. Anything they ask for, I make it.”

“Yasmin, wait until you try her mini strawberry cheesecakes or her sweet potato pies. We all have a running joke that she puts crack in it to keep us wanting more.” Shloob said while everyone laughed.

“I’m definitely looking forward to it.”

“I have a question for you, too.”

“Oh shit, it’s happening.” Quiiso whispered under his breath and everyone kind of looked on with wide eyes.

“Sure, go ahead.”

“What exactly is your job? No one has mentioned it seeing as I didn’t even know you existed until three weeks ago.”

“Oh, I’m a makeup artist. Still fairly new to the industry but I think the favorite person I’ve done work on is Dua Lipa. I know that the two of you are pretty close.”

“A little too close in my opinion.” Jack whispered in your ear, making you laugh.

“Hmm, how’d you meet Urban?”

“We actually ran into each other backstage at the VMA’s and then it just went from there.”

“What are your intentions? Is he your first boyfriend or no?”

“Y/N….” Urban said in a warning tone and you simply looked at him.

“Urb, you wanted me to get to know her right? And wanted for me to not ruin this seeing as you told me that I ruin every single relationship that you’ve been in so I’m doing my best.”

“Wait, what?” Yasmin curiously asked while looking between all of you and you heard Jack sigh from behind you.

“You can do your best without interrogating her, just like you did all the other ones before.” Urban replied while raising his voice.

“I’ve barely said anything to her all night! How am I supposed to get to know her if I don’t ask questions?”

“I really don’t mind answering them…” Yasmin said attempting to try and keep the peace since you and Urban were shooting daggers at each other.

“Should have known your ass was going to do this.”

“I didn’t even do anything!”

“Yet!”

“Fine, Urban, if you are so bothered by me wanting the best for you then I don’t know why we’re still friends.”

“Now wait one got damn minute. Yall are not throwing away ten years of friendship over this. It is not that serious. Can the two of you just apologize and move on?” 2fo piped up and suddenly looked nervous.

“I’m not apologizing for something that I’m not sorry for.”

Damn that stung. 

“Well he told me I ruin everything concerning his relationships and that I’m a hypocrite because I mentioned one of those girlfriends having an attitude and he said mine could use some work.”

“Uhhh… well…”

“SHLOOB!”

“I mean…. That wasn’t totally a lie.”

“Are we seriously doing this right now? So everyone can list my faults but yall are perfect?”

“No one even said that and that’s what your problem is! You never listen when someone is trying to explain something to you and act like the victim!” Urban fired back at you and you could now tell that Yasmin was extremely uncomfortable.

“Will you two calm down?!” Jack exclaimed as his two best friends were going at it. As much as he didn’t want to intervene, this was getting out of hand. 

“I’m not acting like a victim!

“Umm right now you kind of are.” Ace confessed and you just stared at all of them in disbelief. 

“We’re your friends and we are supposed to be honest with you, no matter if it hurts. It’s better we tell you than to lie.”

“Oh, but you all did lie. In ten years, I have kept nothing from any of you and this was really a slap in my face but since I always act like the victim, I won’t say anymore about it. Yasmin, you seem really nice and I wish you and Urban the best. I have a headache so good night.”

Jack tried to pull you back as you attempted to stand up, but he wasn’t quick enough.

You made your way back into the house as it was now silent in the backyard.

“Well consider that our last meal from her probably until 2025. If she wasn’t acting distant before, she damn sure will be distant now.” Nemo said, breaking the silence.

“Jack, is this how it feels when she’s mad at you? Because I don’t really like this.” 2fo confessed.

“Somehow this feels worse.”

Just then Jack eyed Urban who was simply running a hand through his curls while Yasmin was sitting there awkwardly.

“All this shit could have been avoided if you would have told her.”

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[tideswept]

So I'm in trouble but... also inching my way out of it. Precariously.

Yet I still need help.

I've covered the last few months in two other posts, so forgive me for a brief summary before an update.

In September, my mother killed herself when I told her I wanted to move out. She had B(borderline)PD and it'd gotten bad. I couldn't take it anymore.

Unfortunately, I'd quit my job to take care of her after a series of hospital stays and to also secretly do her job for her, as it paid better, and we could survive on it as long as I kept my head down and just did the work.

So overnight I lost my mother and my job. I had no savings because her self-destructive behavior was stealing to buy herself things, and by then she'd stolen my identity and tanked my credit.

With the help of a friend, distant family members, and you guys, I managed to stay afloat a little longer searching for a way to survive. There's no social help available where I live; my last hope was to plead with my aunt to allow me to sleep in her garage while I worked and saved money, paying her what I could in rent, and she told me I wasn't a part of her family.

By then I hadn't been able to pay November's rent, but the landlords kindly did not evict me until this week. With the aid of a friend I've moved temporarily into a motel, and my luck is turning around because I've found a room to rent at a decent price! There's finally a way forward instead of the constant wall I kept slamming into.

I'm terrified. But for once I'm also hopeful. It's a new city, strangers I don't know, and I intend to find a job immediately, but I need a little help. I'm afraid to lose my chance if just one thing doesn't go right. Any money I receive will be spent to pay my phone bill (so that I can apply to jobs), bus fare (more job applying) and a little food. (energy for even MORE job applying)

All I can offer in return for any generosity is my fic writing services, and I will gladly do so. (Okay, well, I could also alpha/beta for you and make moodboards but honestly, I'm not sure anyone wants that. Unless... anyone want a tarot reading? no? okay, I'll shush.)

I'm uh, not ashamed to admit that I'm starting to get overwhelmed and have likely rambled on enough, so I'll just drop the links and say thank you for reading this far. Truly--thank you for listening. It means a lot to me.

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CashApp: $dkbauer

(Ah, one final thing; If you donated before this and want a fic, please poke me! You can remain anonymous if you like, ko-fi will let you message me and my anon asks are also open, just pop in your receipt with your request so I know which donation was yours.)

#berrytalk.txt #oooh boy my legs are shaking like the skeleton dance #if you helped me before seriously give me your fic needs I demand them