#that i wasnt helpful enough

[cocoa-coated-fish]

Go to Part 1

Go to Part 3

oops I made more. This is part 2 of many?? I really like their friendship and think they have a neat dynamic.

This is a little comic that takes place right after the ending of ISAT, while Dormont is partying. I kind of imagine that Sif thinks the party is a Sensory Nightmare and sneaks out, Odile notices, and decides to sit with him.

I like to think she would try and spend more time quietly with Siffrin after what happened in the game to get them used to the idea of someone taking up space with them and that being okay.

This is like? Vaguely spoilers but I'm mostly planning to talk about them being Sad without mentioning anything specifically that happened in the game. Still tagging spoilers just to be safe =)

Anyway people seemed to really like the first comic and seeing all the tags made me happy thank you =))))))

Look at all my ISAT fanart

Look at all my ISAT comics

#isat #i just. Love Them #I think Odile is the person in the party who has the most in common with siffrin #and I think her age would give her some perspective on living with trauma that the others wouldn't have yet #I could also see her blaming herself for being the appointed Smart Person of the group #and not noticing in an earlier loop that Siffrin was struggling #I think she's smart enough to figure out that she probably asked Siffrin in some of the loops if he was okay #and offered her support #and that doing just that on its own wasnt enough to help him #isat spoilers #sasasap #in stars and time #isat siffrin #isat odile #siffrin #odile #artstuffs #isat fanart #isat comics

[personishfive]

in which his life is like a video game

#persona 5 #joker p5 #morgana p5 #akira kurusu #ren amamiya #my art #p5 spoilers #<- i mean. i dont like. say anything outright but like. i feel like i say *enough* in this one. lol #this ones actually pretty old i was just bored and wanted to draw but didnt want to draw enough to do anything serious so i finished it #i almost scrapped it because well it was hard to wrangle and had a minor tone problem but well. they cant all be winners <3 #not my best work but i think the concept is. um. kind of really funny. lol #morgana: shit maybe it'll help him a little to play a game. get his mind off recent events. (it does not do this) #i still think this game is the funniest addition to royal. like they went out of their way to add this akechi themed video game in royal #im gonna be real with you. i think the gray pigeon theory thing is kind of silly. but goro akechi featherman parallels r so real. real shit #have you guys seen proof of justice. wasnt that crazy. that was crazy. #anyway. i want a love so strong it'll bring me back from the dead! or however that featherman episode goes. seeya #comics

[mostlyfate]

Love Me, Love My Voice 很想很想你 · 2023, dir. Sha Wei Qi 1.31 | Since I met you, I’ve used up all the vacation days I’ve saved for years.

#love me love my voice #cdrama #cdramaedit #cdramasource #asiandramasource #dailyasiandramas #很想很想你 #tan jianci #zhou ye #lovemelovemyvoiceedit #lmlmvedit #lmlmv: 1.31 #.gif #help #actually obsessed with them and the osts from this drama 😭 #like i wish i could watch them for the first time again #they've set the bar so high for me #if we had gotten more episodes (not that 33 wasnt enough lol) i'm sure they would of served even more insane chemistry fr #need them in another (modern) drama again please!

[betweenblackberrybranches]

Oup Automaton au Sun doesnt look so good

Kind of spoilery but what can you do

#dca fnaf #automaton au #fnaf sun #sundrop #daycare attendant #my art #guy is fucking exploding #this is actually a lil older i just never posted it #drawing actually helps with my depression #the really hard part is interacting with others #but i really do care for you all so i try even if im exhausted #just really wasnt good enough for it the last few days

[superbellsubways]

beta HB

#she used to be BLONDE #thank god the blonde era is over .❤️ #ive been figuring out her hair for months #was very indecisive #i need to do more with her. #she was made after bitz. cuz bitz' help wasnt enough #but despite that he sees her as a sorta big sister figure? he wouldn't want to admit it tho #oc #original character #heartbreaker #doodle

[daily-hanamura]

#p4 #p4g #persona 4 #persona 4 golden #hanamura yosuke #yosuke hanamura #man yosuke really? more scared than when your own life was in danger in the tv world when your shadow was lashing out? #when you didnt have a persona and you didnt think anyone would do anything to help you? #(i believe it. it's just like yosuke to be like that.) #chewing glass at how invested hes become in nanako and in yu's family I'm honestly just #of course everyone wss terrified for nanako but yosuke describing it as the most terrified hes ever been is really just #also man i wonder what he was going to say when he started trailing off #i bet he was going to say something about how devastated yu was but thought better of it #and im #I feel like for yosuke in that moment when nanako was missing and his partner was emotionally distraught #he must have felt so helpless too #throughout the entire year yosuke took each kidnapping really personally he kept seeing it as a personal failure on his part #when he said he wasnt smart enough or good enough to prevent it even when he knew it was coming #and then to have it happen to someone close #i think yosuke definitely felt all of yu's pain #but he also felt the pain of not being able to do anything more for yu while yu was emotionally falling apart #like hes not just let nanako down but also his best friend too and IM JUST #ok im shutting up now bye #he's good with his queue

[ganondoodle]

hope everyone had alright holidays!

a few days ago when we were driving home in the dark in windy and rainy weather after getting two of my siblings from the train we, for the first time in my lifetime im pretty sure, hit a deer that was crossing the street, none of us saw them before they got caught in the headlights and the first one made it over but we werent yet slow enough to not hit the second one ...

the deer lived but was kinda stunned, my dad pushed it off the street and while we were still on the phone with police it got up and ran away but my parents car got damaged and while its still drivable there are several parts that got bent and since its an older model too it might be hard to get it repaired

anyway, i didnt know deer fur was that grey until i saw it stuck to our bumper :(

merry crisis

#ganondoodles talks #random #personal #we are all fine and i wasnt the one driving #i just feel extra bad bc i was there in the front to help watch out for exactly stuff like that #but it was a weird spot and strange in that weather for them to cross #the police told us there was another accident with deer literally 10 minutes before us in the same area #so maybe thats why it was only two ......... #i hope the deer is fine tho im pretty sure it at least has a broken leg #also i hope insurance covers the cost and it wont take too long #im very glad we were slow enough to not kill the deer and also not hurt it bloody bc i am still thinking about how it tumbled across #i am salty about how many people were speeding past us tho #car on the side with warning lights on and all doors open two people in car and two outside putting warning thingies up #if my dad hadnt pushed the stunned deer off the street when no one was coming it would have ended way worse for everyone involved

[sea-buns]

Holy fuck, man. What a trip Fearne has been on, huh?

You tell her how grateful you are to have her in your life, you flatter her, you tell her you need her, that you have to do this together. You have her make a promise that has this woman, born of chaos and fey, agreeing through shaking hands and a trembling voice.

You make her deceive your friends; you make her follow where they cannot know; you make her help you into this contraption; you make her feed this thing into you despite the fact that you both have been warned extensively of the risks. You make her watch you crumble and splinter and shatter and fracture and burst and implode. You make her watch you die, over and over and over and over, for a minute in agonizing bullet time.

You make her do all these things, because when she tries to back out, when she tries to not be the one who let you do this—how could you do this—

you tell her, "YOU PROMISED."

Because if there's one thing you know, it's that the fey do not break a promise.

#cant wait for her to fucking pissed for a very long time. shes really packing the entire human experience in a very short period of time. #critical role #cr spoilers #c3e77 #fearne calloway #ashton greymoore #bells hells #just gonna get ahead of the um actually mfs and state that i am aware that its not confirmed that thats why ash brought up the promise #but boy howdy would it make for some great drama down the line huh? #edit: apparently i did not get ahead enough cuz ive had to turn off replies #since ppl were somehow interpreting this mini introspection piece as me infantilizing fearne?? #anyway the first line is now changed to something a bit more neutral. after sleeping on it i do see how it was a bit aggressive at the top #other than that im not sure how else to reword without completely disregarding the core of the post #i might make more posts addressing this but im not sure yet. i wanna try to approach it in the best way possible. #but if it helps any the point of the post was not to say fearne had no agency. she had plenty of moments where she tilted one way or the #other. the POINT was to just shine some light on the emotional pressure she had been put under. #hasnt your friend ever asked you to keep a secret or promise that felt wrong or unsafe or made you anxious? #it has nothing to do with the amount of agency she had. ash wasnt holding a knife to her throat and forcing her to follow against her will #all i was trying to do was take this detail about his reminder of the promise that i thought was interesting and have some fun writing an #overview of the kinda stress she was under BEFORE theyd reached that scene. this entire ep was everyone discussing how grateful they were #for this family theyd made. and while im not saying ash was PURPOSELY emotionally manipulating fearne.. #there is a level of unintentional manipulation when you pair the severity of his request with the convo theyd had 2 seconds prior #as well as the desperate need they all have to save each other NO MATTER WHAT. #ash was giving incredibly strong energy of a friend who peer pressures you into helping them do something that you know in your gut WILL #cause problems. hes a fucked up guy. theyre all fucked up guys. even if he didnt mean to “force” her into anything the pressure was THERE. #<- i feel like all of this overall gets my message across. i think maybe ill clean it up later into its own post. #im gonna try not to rush myself to get it done tho. #im under no obligation to explain myself. especially when ppl approach the misunderstanding by being rude af. but i do think it CAN #be clarified so id at least like to try to some degree

[martyrbat]

batman confidential #1

[ID: Alfred Pennyworth walking down the stairs into the Batcave—where Bruce Wayne sits in the dark and in his costume with the cowl pulled down. Alfred announces, “Coffee, eggs benedict and The Daily Planet, Master Bruce. I took the liberty of presuming you would be taking breakfast in the cave this morning.” Alfred sets the tray down on a nearby table as Bruce silently holds a gun up without looking at him, his finger still on the trigger. Alfred gasps, “Master Bruce? That gun, is it...?” He trails off but Bruce speaks up. “The one he used. That night. On them. I took it from the G.C.P.D. evidence depository last year... there was nothing more they could learn from it.” Bruce unloads it, letting a bullet clank to the desk before he picks it up and stares somberly at it. Alfred stiffens up as he asks, “I see. And what precisely did you hope to achieve by stealing your parents' murder weapon, if may be so bold as to inquire...? Beyond an increased capacity for morbid introspection, that is.”

Bruce elaborates, “He fired two rounds. 117-grain hollowpoints... twenty-five cents apiece from any gun store. Is that all their lives were worth, Alfred? Fifty cents of ammunition...? He left four rounds in the clip, one in the breech, dropped it and ran—afraid to finish what he started. And I just stood there. Helpless.” Alfred tells him, “The good your parents did lives on, Master Bruce. And I, for one, am glad he left those final rounds in the gun. I happen to believe the world is better served for having you in it.” Bruce still doesn't look at Alfred or acknowledge the kind statement. He'll go on to explain that a young mother was murdered while he was on patrol and that he blames himself for not preventing it. END ID]

#SORRY JUST THINKING ABOUT THIS AGAIN AND BRUCE BEING SO AGGRESSIVELY BUT PASSIVELY SUICIDAL... #sitting alone in the dark thinking about the deaths he couldn't prevent. thinking about a child who will never know their mother because he #couldn't save her in time (but he did save the baby but thats not enough; itll never be enough. #he doesn't celebrate the victories on account of always mourning the failures) #holding a gun—THAT gun—and thinking his life is worth less than 25 cents of ammunition. that it still is. #blaming himself for his parents murders for so long that it carries to every stranger. he holds them all in his stupid bleeding heart. #alfred saying hes GLAD bruce wasnt murdered and all bruce can think is what use is he if he cant prevent others deaths? #why was he spared but his parents werent? they were helping the city but ‘how can i make a difference when all i do is mop up bloodstains?’ #AND!!!! JUST HIM HAVING THE GUN!!!! HE STOLE IT WHEN HE BEGAN BEING BATMAN AND ALFRED NOT KNOWING ABOUT IT!!!!???!!!! #HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE SAT IN THAT DARK CAVE JUST HOLDING IT AND FEELING THE WEIGHT OF IT THAT GETS HEAVIER AND HEAVIER WITH EACH FAILURE? #HOW MANY TIMES HAS HE DEBATED USING IT ON HIMSELF? IF GOTHAM WOULD BE BETTER FOR IT? #JUST!!!!! BRUCE !!!!!!!!!! #happy sad boy sunday !!! #<- it's wednesday. #c: batman confidential | i: 1 #crypt's panels #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #alfred & bruce #bruce & guns

[refrigeratedboombursts]

Both Kamado and Volo suck, the difference is that Volo gets sent to gay baby jail and Kamado to “you remind me too much of my shitty dad for me to actually look at your actions from a justified pov” jail.

#pokemon legends arceus #kamado #volo #i keep seeing posts that are like “kamado is a better person than volo” and. why are we pitting two bad bitches #derogatory #against each other #/silly #they both suck and im tired of pretending that they dont. #but volo is easier to forgive because he didnt directly betray the protag(in particular). #kamado took everything from us #our friends our home #he essentially did to the protag what pokemon did to him #the difference was that he KNEW. he KNEW that he was doing it. maybe he wasnt self aware enough to understand. but it was a conscious #decision based on prejudice #also instead of it veing volo who helps the protag it shouldve been the miss fortune sisters #like. theyve been through this exact same thing and irida said that coin in particular was really kind

[conanssummerchild]

me and my dad are like abed and jeff in the way that jeff always gets abeds references, theyre two characters that mirror eachother, they understand and relate to eachother in a way thats different from other characters relationships, but also in the way jeff fantasises about strangling abed, "you try to get him to do something normal without abusing him!", "youre a robot, abed". and still jeff goes in for two hugs before abed leaves.

#been trying to work through my feelings about my relationship with my father lately in a healthy way #(through my favourite media) #its sad because if my dad wasnt such a self centred thinks hes smarter than everyone else rude passive agressive dick #maybe we could have the best relationship #because we are so painfully similar #we are literally just like jeff and abed #but i mean jeff said it in the third episode “i dont want to be your father” #my dad wants to help me about as much as jeff wants to help #and yet in the first episode jeff is the one to tell abed “you have aspergers” #and in e3 “abed is not normal” #like hes the first to acknowledge abeds autism he just doesnt care enough to help #and all the sarcastic robot jokes god #those are practically taken out of my fathers mouth #alex says shit #alex is an idiot #community #abed nadir #jeff winger #tagging in case i actually said smth that makes sense but if not take this with a grain of salt its fully me projecting #nbc community #also sorry for familial relationship-ising ur jabed not tryna turn this into jeffannie #just tryna get thru my daddy issues

[the-judicial-assistants-notebook]

oh yeah i hate this btw. lmao:

#so she didnt know phoenix had a daughter but she knew kristoph well enough to imitate his voice and parallel his sprites? #cool cool cool aha *explodes* #ema skye #kristoph gavin #ace attorney apollo justice #it's the. implications of it. the idea that phoenix wasnt talking to her and she got assigned to the prosecutor who took him down #and then she has to work with /another/ gavin but this one is. nice. strange maybe but nice. #and the only other person around who seems to fully be on phoenix's side. his one real ally aside from her and one he actually talks to. #her relationship with apollo shows that she's willing to cooperate with DAs so long as they're connected to phoenix and kristoph was #so she probably had no qualms helping him. i wonder how much info about him he got from her and how much he used her #all while exchanging them for little hints about how phoenix was doing and what he was doing and if he was all right #i wonder if she passed the pin phoenix wears in his beanie through kristoph. just to remind him she was still there if he ever needed her #aa4 explain ANYTHING about kristoph challenge (impossible) #im pretty sure she got it from him too? no one else around her really crosses their arms like that. #phoenix doesnt klavier doesnt lana definitely doesnt... mayyyyybe edgeworth? but he tends to tuck his left hand under which is opposite #and the way she folds her arms in the investigation games is different. there she DOES tuck her left hand out of sight like edgeworth #so it's like she did imitate him a little at one point and kristoph somehow overwrote that. like he overwrites miles's place in nick's life #ahaaaa anyway im so normal about them

[razberrypuck]

rotating henry emily in my mind

#clarifying now that this is abt the games #the fandom at large is missing out on henrys character i think and its such a shame #bc he + his dynamic with william are sososo interesting #like this isnt abt anyone specific but it seems like most people portray him as just another parent that lost a kid (but Plot Relevant) #but the thing is. he was completely complicit in the missing childrens incident. he wasnt actively helping william or anything #but he KNEW it was him From The Beginning. he KNEW william was a threat. but the only time he ever said anything was To William Directly. #we dont talk enough abt the candy cadet story about the boy and the snake. or the “bear of vengeance” cutscenes. #that is will and henry. that is Very Directly What Happened in 1985. #in a lot of theories (coughgametheorycough) its stated that henry kicked william out. except william left on his own. #henry was upset with him yes he tried to confront him yes but he could NEVER kick him out. #the boy could not bear to get rid of the snake #and all of that is. so much more compelling than henry being demoted to the sidelines. #rrghfgrgrrh anyway. ask me about. fnaf. #fnaf #five nights at freddy's #henry emily

[lobotomyladylives]

I think bpd is a bullshit stigmatizing label thrown at women to pathologize what is very obviously a response to prolonged childhood trauma and would be better labeled as C-PTSD. that being said my god I am bpd as fuck

#my sister just snapped at me bc i said i dont want to do a ton of physical labor for the job she signed me up for which apparently does i #in fact involve a lot of it. and her being mad for even that moment sent me spiraling so badly & i had the reaction i often do where #i start hating both her & myself terribly & want to isolate forever #i think she hates her new job & is taking it out on me but it doesnt matter bc i cant handle being yelled at #and the fact thst it took me till adulthood to realize thats bc i associate it with my father is crazy. yeah its just the cptsd like #everything else. and whats nutso is how i continue to think my trauma Wasnt Bad Enough for ptsd . #just bc he didnt beat the shit out of or molest me i feel like i dont even have a right to be this fucked up #not that it was only him. being bullied at school really did not help. i guess now that i think about it the problem is that until #i was a teenager i literally did not feel emotionally secure anywhere. home or school. always the ticking of a bomb in the bg #the inevitable moment my dad blew up over nothing or i overheard my peers talking about what a freak i was #i dont know why it still hurts to think about. im so far removed from it my life now couldnt be more different #well thats the stupid fucking thing about childhood isnt it. those are your very first experiences with the world & other ppl #i do know my view of romantic relationships was irrevocably poisoned by my parents & that is never going to be undone. so cool

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

ohhhhmygod im gonna be sick. actually nauseous and i did it to myself - there was a spider on the countertop and i Panicked, grabbing the first distance-killer i could grab. it was a grease cleaner spray. i buried it in the stuff, walked away to recover mentally, came back

it fucking fell apart and dissolved into the cleaner. i both feel horrible and im disgusted beyond words. how the fuck do i get rid of it

#slamming my face into a wall repeatedly #i cant leave it there to deal with after Sleep #bc my cats like to go onto the countertops when no one is looking #and i dont want either of them to get poisoned #but i cant rinse it into the sink with the faucet hose bc there's stuff in the sink #but idk if i can bring myself to do dishes with That next to me #and my fear of spiders is so intense that i Cannot get close enough to take care of it with a towel or somethin #im very good at fucking myself over in various ways! #if i had an appetite id lose it. permanently #what if! instead of dealing with it! i curl up in a corner and cry #except im not gonna do that ive filled my tears quota for the year & doing nothing wont help anything #sorry for venting again i just. ohhhhh this is horrible this is Terrible #if i still had my whacking stick id tape a big wad of paper towels to the end and clean the mess up that way #from a Distance! #absolutely unprompted #i wish i wasnt so terrified of spiders #they scare me So much.... #the point of feeling physically ill! and like sobbing! or panicking! and this spider was Big! #i wish they'd stop coming into the house.... i hate killing them but i cant function knowing theyre there #but i can't force myself close enough to put them in a cup and bring them outside #so now i have THAT on my counter. disintegrated spider. #life is too fucking much lately... jesus.... i should really just bite the bullet and get this shit over with #no use waiting a month in perpetual terror unease and guilt. do it scared yk yk #im tired of my chest hurting and not being able to eat! i dont like it! i need change! terrifying horrible change!

[stardustdiver]

ynow i always feel like caffine does absolutely nothing to me

bc i can have coffee and im feeling anywhere from on any given day: tired sleepy, riddled with anxiety and/or hypersensitivity, and 🧍 emoji irl

then days where i give the coffee a skip, i can range from: tired sleepy, riddled with anxiety and/or hypersensitivity, 🧍emoji irl

i dont think days with coffee strike me as any particular state more than others compared to days without coffee

#using autism creacher as a visual reference #i dont think the caffine helps with anything #it just enters the body then.... nothing #autism creature #autism #adhd #potentially #its a heavy part of the adhd selfdx #that and the memory #autistic #actually autistic #coffee #caffeine #i did stop drinking it for like 1-2 weeks and i felt the exact same as when i was drinking coffee #i stopped bc eczema flare up and was trying to find out if it was the coffee causing it #spoilers: it wasnt the coffee #i also didnt have any withdrawals? maybe i havent been drinking that much/long enough to get withdrawals? #no headaches or whatever in that timeframe #ofc i do also get days where im brrrrrr and i git the energy but like #thats not a coffee day only event #this one is doing numbers just a lil bit huh