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#the silliest fellas around....

stormmei · 23 days

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Leon being the silliest fella around‼️‼️🤠🤠

He would literally be a Facebook boomer change my mind.

#leon kennedy #re4 remake #re4 #leon #resident evil #sillyposting #silly little guy #i wanna chew on him

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thedivineflowers · 8 months

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Had a funny thought but imagine RSA meeting middle school!reader, and seeing how absolutely feral they are.

But some see past that, and see just a child and immediately go to pick them up and hold them like a stuffed animal saying:

"Awww look at the little baby!!!"

❤ anon

HOLY SHIT YOURE SO SMART ❤️ NONNIE ONG

So.

Apparently selected students of RSA were allowed on a field trip to NRC.

And you being one of the most popular students at NRC Crowley said that you'd be giving the students a tour. You of course couldn't go against Crowleys word or else you wouldn't be eating for the week 😔.

You had to wait in the mirror chamber for the RSA students to come through and when they did you had introduced yourself. "My Name is Y/n, I will be giving you all a tour of the school, and after that I will lead you to where you all will be staying for the next three days." You said, trying to stay professional like Crowley said so he doesn't take your allowance.

Neige

Before you couldn't say anything else the student named Neige Leblanche had tilted your head up so he could take a look at you. "Aww! When I heard Vil talking about you he showed me a picture of you and you look even cuter in person!! You have to see this!" Neige squealed as he squished your cheeks and showed you to the dwarfs

That's how it was for the whole tour, even when you got into a small fight with a Savannaclaw group Neige squealed over you.

"Oh, look at how brave you are! I'm sure Vil is so proud of you! I seriously wish I met you sooner!" Neige said as he hugged your head. Dawg his hands were so soft and warm it took you everything in your being to not sob and cry in his arms right there.

And when you lead them to ypur dorm where they were staying Neige was CONCERNED FOR YOU.

"Oh, so you stay here by yourself?" Neige asked. "I stay here with a Cat named Grim, I'm sorry about how dirty the dorm is. Crowley left me on a short notice so I could only clean three rooms decently." You said calmly to Neige. "Really? I've taken care of a cottage by myself but not a whole dorm building! That must be so tiring for you to clean so much!" Neige said with a concerned face. "I'm used to it. Anyways I have to go make dinner for you and the others." He looked at you with a shocked face as you walked into the kitchen.

10/10 would recommend but he insisted that he go to have a conversation with Crowley with how he treated you. In the end you got him to stay and he gave you cookies. His dwarfs also are the bestest of friends with you and have given you flowers to press in a book that Neige gave you for the inconvenience.

Chen'ya

You and him immediately locked eyes and smirked. Y'all are the bestest of the silliest of people. Literally you can tell when he is with you that is how close y'all two are like fuck.

You were dubbed as Chen'ya's younger sibling with how you two will mess with people by the RSA students who went on the trip

And genuinely he like cares about you that he refuses to let you sleep on the couch while he slept in your room he had to roll you up in blankets and place you on the bed while he slept in the room you cleaned for him.

Even when you got into a fight with the Savannaclaw group he backed you up and scared the students away with you.

During the tour he gave you the most randomest things that he claimed to have found lying around. You ended the day with 1,000 more madol in your pocket.

If you're seen as feral on a normal Tuesday then wait for when Chen'ya appears. Riddle and Trey will be jump scared so much by the two of you you were so close to being burnt by fresh tea and getting hit with a whisk.

10/10 outta pocket fella and you two harassed Crowley into giving you more allowance. (MC has magic after their own overblot) He even taught you how to appear and scare people the way he does using your magic.

My Spotify was fucking up and I got annoyed but I genuinely liked writing this even if it seems to not have any energy to some people.

I would've added prince Rielle but I don't know anything about little man but if I find out more about him to be able to write him I will do it.

I might write when you met them for the first time maybe. 🧍‍♂️

Anyways here you go my ❤️ anon pookie ❤️❤️❤️❤️

#thedivineflowers #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #Chen'ya x reader #Neige Leblanche x reader #middle schooler mc #middle school mc #twst x child reader #royal sword academy

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bumblinv · 1 year

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--- omaticayan (house) cats ☆ﾟ.*･｡ﾟ

feauturing neteyam, kiri, lo’ak, tuk

headcanons of them as literal house cats bc the entire omaticaya clan are just 3-meters-tall, walking, blue forests cats with bows. change. my. mind.

: ̗̀➛ tuk ; tabby kitten

“what breed is she?”

“just a little girl”

you don’t know her exact breed

no one can blame you tho, she was jus a baby left by her mother in your backyard, that you took in

could be a mix of all sort of breeds, but to you, tuk was your little girl

the moment you took her in, she was severely malnourished. so you feed her with your own hands, bathe her, sleep with her each night

she was like your own child

and you’re ready to fight every single person in this planet if someone dare to lift a finger againts her

the bravest little kitten you’ve ever know

but the silliest too,

her entire body went wet as she got in, headfirst, into her bowl when she first learned to eat wet food

and one time she jumped into your aquarium to ‘catch’ the fishes

she would snatch pieces of wings from your plate and holds on it for her dear life when you tried to take it away from her </3

you would crochet matching hats for you and her

overall, the best lil girl ever

: ̗̀➛ lo’ak ; bengal cat

do i need to say more

he’d run all over the house, pouncing at every moving thing in sight, playing with his toys for hours, and getting to high places you never knew he could reach

one time he somehow got to the house’s roof. it freaked you out

you were convinced that this little bundle of energy is literally a cheerful puppy in cat’s clothing

with his adorable little coat, that took some time to put on, you take him to the park each morning. this is mandatory, or else he’s too energize to sleep at night and would start knocking things over at 3am (wich you learned the hard way)

at the park, his curious self would sniff everything and anything. a tree, a man’s leg, until he got too curious to a little winged fella, that a pigeon once pecked him on the head

he befriended every single dog and cat around the park, but would get a little salty if new people tried to touch him

at night, when finally, his energy went to 0%, he got cuddly. really cuddly, he sticks to you like glue

and i know he would sleep on your chest and suffocates you in your sleep

: ̗̀➛ kiri ; persian cat

she so bougie ngl

and a little moody too

you wont need an alaram clock, cause every morning, at the exact same time, she would sit on your face and starts screaming for food

i hope your wallet thick as hell cause i know she would only eat whole foods, like those healthy (and super fucking pricy) food rich cat persons feed their cats

kiri right there eating salmon and chicken breasts, and you’re left slurping your sad instant ramen

things we do for our cats ammirite

half of your life savings went to her

from grooming money, for buying her expensive foods and vitamins, to all her essentials like her high tech self cleaning litter box(?)

she spoiled as hell

but i know she still has the audacity to scratch your hand and legs

don’t get me wrong, she loves you. the two things she dislikes the least was you and the big blue fish living in your pond (it was rotxo)

: ̗̀➛ neteyam ; golden retriever

I KNOW I SAID CATS

but none of yall could deny

even as a person, he got that golden retriever personality

always have a smile on his face, tail wagging every time

calm and loving,

would befriend every other animal you foster, you sometimes find them all cuddled up together

have i mention that he loves cuddling?

but remember he’s huge

would crush you every time he cuddles into your lap

but you never minded, cause he’s the sweetest, most gentle giant

#avatar #avatar x reader #avatar headcanons #avatar cats #avatar as cats #neteyam #neteyam x reader #neteyam x you #lo'ak #lo'ak x reader #lo'ak imagine #kiri #kiri x reader #atwow tuk #tuk #tuktirey

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tainted-heartz · 1 year

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| howdy with his s/o general hcs. |

- howdy confessed to you almost an entire year after meeting you , the way he confessed? a bunch of your favorite flowers but the poor fella couldn't get a word out-

- he enjoys your visits and especially the things you make him in exchange for a lot of items! he keeps every single one of them even if its a pretty rock you found,it's gonna be sat right by his window along with a lot of other trinkets you give him.

- he loves just giving you random smooches , either it be on your face or even your lips. sometimes he just really wants to see you flustered (in a sweet way of course!)

- howdy is also a GREAT cuddle buddy with all those arms of his. plus he's just very cozy in general especially when he isn't up running around but him just being relaxed around you is a very sweet thing.

- LOVES when you play with his hair or simply just hold him. it's reassuring to him that he can relax around you.

- may ask if you would want to work along side him , yeah he already has four hands to help around be a extra pair wouldn't hurt!

- you two get called ‘lovebugs’ by julie almost as a silly joke which always gets howdy flustered to the point where he has to excuse himself from the conversation.

- on days where he comes to visit your home it leads to him staying over , just holding each other and watching movies. maybe even talking about the silliest of things like him becoming a butterfly or even your lives in the future..if there will be one of course.

#welcome home x reader #welcome home arg #welcome home howdy #welcome home arg x reader #i love this fella very much-

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poll-life-smp · 12 days

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Session 2

More info about the creators:

Misterjoker:

silliest fella alive. an amazing builder. a jester. a stinker. you may know him as the J in the JITS crew. constantly has the air of "up to no good" even if there is no reason to have it

Cubfan:

None given yet :(

Aimsey:

Lesbian and vocal about it, loud, dramatic, good at managing things (like being sandkeeper in sands of time in mcc), really likes fnaf, usually just there to have a fun, crazy time

Cherrifire:

Cherri has been tormented by Martyn InTheLittleWood himself, guaranteed!

Doctor4t:

Doctor4t is a French bastard of a modder and an all around freak. He's best known for blowing stuff up, making explosives and coding a fullly functional habitable airship. Which may or may not explode. He runs Content SMP where he spends his days committing war crimes, murder and playing with his pet rats.

Joe Hills:

Who's the man who can conquer death? That's Joe Hills! Joe is potentially not the best at pvp, but what he is great in is unpredictability. No matter what happens, he will operate on a principle known as "The Joe Hills Difference", which allows for peculiarity and absurdity to prevail. This man may be clumsy, but he sure is lucky. Plus, he was frequently HotGuy target practice, so he might just have a bit of experience dodging a bullet here and there.

#poll life smp #poll #session 2 #misterjokertv #cubfan135 #joe hills #aimseytv #cherrifire #doctor4t #life series #traffic smp

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starryevermore · 1 year

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sweet memories ✧ benoit blanc

angst city™ library | send in a request (consult request faqs first)

request: Either 3 separate ideas or all together into one: (for Knives out/Glass onion. Any character but probs best for detective Blanc)

● Getting drunk/tipsy and reminiscing their time in their training

● Blanc (?) and reader on a case and one of them gets severely hurt and it’s a choice of whether they continue to chase suspect or help the other

● one of them trying to re-enact what theoretically could have happened on a case, person b paying no attention to this, and suddenly person A is in front of them trying different death methods. Someone walking in and being horrified. Person B saying sorry, person A saying it’s normal. - anon

pairing: benoit blanc x male!reader

summary: you and benoit reminisce on your relationship.

word count: 1,613

warnings?: minor spoilers for glass onion, maybe slightly out of character benoit, established relationship, fluff, gunshot wound, mention of murder, not proofread

Benoit Blanc had not changed much since you had last seen him, you mused. Still had his beautiful, piercing blue eyes. Still had a brain that run a million miles a minute. Still managed to impress you with every single thing he does. It was almost unfair, how perfect the man sitting across from you was. At least he had one fault that you knew of. At least you could still pull out the fact that you’ve beat him at every single game of Clue you played against him. He always hated when you did that, arguing that he wasn’t good at dumb games so it wasn’t fair to keep holding that over his head. But with that sparkling twinkle in his eyes, you knew he didn’t really mean it. Benoit was a teasing man—around you, at least. To the rest of the world, he was the world’s greatest detective. But to you, he was ole Benny, an awkward fella who was a far shout from the greatest at anything.

“Ain’t seen you in a while,” he said, looking at you over the rim of his glass as he took a long sip of his drink. He set the glass down, smacking his lips. “You solve any good mysteries lately?”

“Nothing as great as you,” you said. “I mean, showing the world that Miles Brown is a complete nitwit? You’re really taking that whole eat-the-rich thing to heart.”

Benoit waved you off, shaking his head. “It was dumber than a game of Clue. Man didn’t even have the ability to come up with an original murder. Stole all his ideas from everyone.”

“Well, look on the bright side. At least you finally won a game of Clue,” you teased, leaning forward, resting your elbows on the table. “Never thought I’d see the day. Someone should put that in the history books, you know. Benoit Blanc: World’s Greatest Detective, Bested by Clue Except for that One Time.”

“That’s a terrible title for a book. Nobody’d pick it up.”

“I would.”

“Probably ‘cause you’d be the one writin’ it.”

You hummed, taking a sip of your drink. “Someone’s gotta expose you as the dork you truly are. Everyone acts like you’re some James Bond type o’ figure. They deserve to know you’re more of…I don’t know. Who’s the silliest character you can think of?”

Benoit hummed. “Clark Kent?”

“I said silliest character, not the character you’ve got the hots for!” you laughed.

“Oh, come on! The whole glasses disguise? Seriously? No one ever thought, hey this guy looks kinda sorta similar to Superman? I refuse to believe that!”

“Not everyone is as brilliant as you, Benny boy,” you said. You took another sip of your drink. “God, I hate Superman. Remember that one time, when we were working a case together? The jewelry heist case?”

Benoit’s face turned red. He probably didn’t like thinking of that case very much. You couldn’t blame him, if you were being honest. You didn’t like to think of it, either. “You know I could never forget that case.”

“All I really remember of it is bein’ in the hospital. They had stupid Superman movie playing all the time. Man of Steel, or somethin’? I used to like it before, but god, a guy can only watch that shit so many times before it gets annoyin’. I swear, if I see Henry Cavill put on that super suit again, it’d be too soon.”

“I’d prefer to remember it as the day I realized I love you,” Benoit said.

You let out a laugh. “What, it took me being on my death bed to realize you loved me?”

It had been a complete and utter disaster. It wasn’t often that you and Benoit worked together on a case. But this was a tough nut to crack, so Benoit invited you along, telling the client that if she wanted the case to be solved, it was imperative you be there, too. The client hadn’t really been willing, but recognized she had no real choice in the matter so she bit her tongue. After all, she wanted to make sure she was not the victim in the jewelry heist.

Things had gone well enough, if you were being honest. After a few false starts and some misleading clues, you and Benoit were close to triumphant. But neither of you could have expected the suspect to have a gun, much less use it.

He’d been aiming at Benoit. You panicked, your blood running cold. Before you could even think about what you were doing, you jumped and positioned yourself between Benoit and the bullet. It struck you, lodging itself in your side. You screamed as you fell, hitting the floor, hard.

Pain practically blinded you as you reached up, touching your wound. When you pulled your hand away, it was sticky with blood. You lifted your head, seeing Benoit falling to his knees, his hand covering your wound, applying pressure. You twisted your head the best you could, watching as the suspect ran.

“Go,” you whispered. You couldn’t manage to make your voice any louder. Took too much energy. “You’re gonna lose him. We won’t get another chance like this.”

“I can’t lose you,” Benoit said.

“I’ll be fine, go get him.”

“Don’t make me leave you,” Benoit whispered, leaning over you, his lips ghosting over your forehead. “I love you. I can’t lose you. I love you.”

“It was an emotional moment!” Benoit argued. “It ain’t strange for things to be revealed in times of high stress, you know.”

“I know,” you said. You reached over, grabbing his hand, giving it a squeeze. “I just hate that it took you so long. To think we might have gotten together a lot sooner if I told you I loved you when I realized.”

Benoit let out a laugh so loud it practically shook the walls of the kitchen. “Oh, come on. At least when I realized, it had a sort of morbid romantic edge. Yours was just me being an idiot!”

“Well, I love when you’re an idiot.”

It was the early days in your friendship. You and Benoit had often worked together back then, honing your detective skills, bouncing ideas off each other. It felt less like a job that way. It felt more like playing a game of Clue (despite Benny’s aversion to the game). In any case, it was more fun that way. Plus, it gave you and Benoit a chance to develop some more unconventional methods of solving cases. Which is exactly what you were doing.

You and Benoit were working out how the victim may have died. You had narrowed down to a few different murder weapons that might have been it, but you and Benoit couldn’t quite figure out how it had happened. So, it was only natural that the two of you ran through some different scenarios in an effort to narrow some the possibilities.

That was how you ended up straddling Benoit, who laid on his back on the floor, his hands above his head as if he were surrendering. Your breath caught in your throat at the position. You liked it—you like it a lot. But you forced yourself to ignore the thought about what it may be like if you were in this same position with a little less clothes. You had to remain professional. You had to.

You raised your hand holding the prop knife, acting like you were going to drive it through Benoit’s chest. As you brought it down, the fake blade pushing itself into the handle, you frowned. This didn’t make sense. The victim had been fighting back, and this position didn’t give much opportunity to do it. “No, I don’t think it was like this. Here, trade places with me.”

You lifted yourself off of Benoit and laid on the floor. Benoit straddled you now. Your breath hitched as he reached down, his hands closing around your throat.

“The victim had injuries on her hands, like someone’d been tryin’ to pry her hands off of ‘em,” Benoit said.

“When the killer couldn’t do that, they kneed her in the stomach,” you continued, bring your leg up, pressing your knee into Benoit’s stomach.

“And then—”

The door opened. There was a shout. Benoit lifted his head, his face tinted red as he looked at the person who walked inside.

“Oh, god!” the person said. It was your client. Fuck. “I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean t-to see anything!”

“Oh, it’s not like that!” Benoit said. “We’re just tryin’ to act out the murder!”

You cleared your throat, trying to twist your head to look at her. “Totally normal. All the professionals do it.”

“I-I’ll leave you it then…”

She left as quick as she came, shutting the door behind you. As you and Benoit looked at each other again, you felt like your face was burning.

“Um, so that seems like it was the way it happened…” you mumbled.

“Right, right,” Benoit said, getting off of you. “Uh, with that done, we should start narrowing down the suspects, then.”

You nodded. “Yeah. Just give me a moment and I’ll be ready.”

Because, holy fuck, how could you be in a position like this and just expect to continue on as normal?

“If you love your idiot so much then, how ‘bout you join me in the bath, then?” Benoit asked. “Gets a bit lonely in there, you know.”

Your snorted. “Fine. But we’re not staying there for a week, alright?”

“I’m sure I could convince you otherwise.”

“We’ll see.”

Oh, how you loved your silly little detective.

#benoit blanc imagine #benoit blanc x reader #benoit blanc x male!reader #benoit blanc x you #benoit blanc x y/n #benoit blanc fic #benoit blanc fanfiction #benoit blanc fan fiction #benoit blanc fanfic #benoit blanc fan fic #starrywrites #starryevermore

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much-significant-harassment · 7 months

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Introducing the silliest guys ever.

Riley and Joanah. Coworkers by day. Fucked up fellas by night.

Riley was a fairly average dude, maybe a little eccentric, before he met Joanah. And something about the tall, sturdy character made him immediately obsessed with him. Already with the hobby of photography, he took up stalking Joanah to learn more and more about him. Riley isn't very consistent though, so he does miss quite a few things here and there...

Joanah is a serial killer. One known but ht hasn't been given a title yet. He's intelligent, and knows how to do a job without a trace and make it look like something it isn't. He may have a small crush on Riley, but it's more or less just liking to be around him. He's slowly starting to suspect he's being stalked, but he's not sure by who or how. He keeps a tight schedule.

#ps its art #stalkiller #<their tag for now

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froggymarsh · 1 year

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some guys to consider for dynamics: mumbo & martyn. joel & fwhip. uhhh i cant think of anymore rn but. i will send another ask if i rember. - teddy

OUGH good ones good ones lemme see.

cg!mumbo & lil!martyn:

this is. the hermit challenges guy. he stumbles over himself the first time because he always does when confronted with a new regressor to take care of, but once he’s had a bit to feel his way around, he matches Martyn’s energy pretty well :D

he is very very silly. he does funny voices and over exaggerates his reactions but doesn't go super over the top, so martyn just laughs and it isn't too much

champion of piggy back rides :D martyn likes being up that high

martyn is about to do something potentially dangerous and mumbo talks him down very panicked but still somehow very silly

cg!martyn and lil!mumbo:

Mumbo expresses discomfort with trying something and Martyn answers with something like "oh, c'mon you don't wanna give it a little go? Just a test to see if you like it?" and it takes a lot of convincing but Martyn is determined to get little anxious baby Mumbo to try things. (note: he doesn't force him, just manages to convince him to try it. mumbo clings to him as much as he can and he's terrified through the whole thing. if he really really can't do it then martyn says he's proud of mumbo for considering it and they don't do the thing)

he's never outright mean but he's definitely a big tease. he's used to caregiving for timmy, which means a lot of loving bullying, and that will accidentally carry over into caring for mumbo because the two are pretty similar in martyn's eyes

martyn has a bit of a hard time carrying mumbo around but that doesn't stop him from trying!!

i am honestly not doing their dynamic justice. i think they would be the silliest pair ever and i love them. but i cannot for the life of me describe it. they are beloveds.

fwhip & joel

empires 1:

there would be so so much anxiety involved in every single one of their interactions because, yes, they are friends, but they know they aren't supposed to be. fwhip regresses super inconsistently so he goes small at some of the most random and borderline inconvenient times and joel just. joel just panics, like ah. this is my enemy and he is mentally five years old. not great. okay. he does his best to whisk fwhip away somewhere safe so he can take care of him and not get in trouble with jimmy at the same time

it's not great. it's super anxiety fueled, fwhip has a hard time staying small on a good day, so with joel checking his 6 every ten seconds it's so so much harder

fwhip taking care of an anxious joel isn't much easier, joel's nervous energy translates into fwhip half regressing with him and neither of them can really take care of each other but their doing their best.

one day jimmy probably catches them and he doesn't react negatively and that's a HUGE relief they can actually start acting normal around each other

joel's pretty hands off but in a weirdly hands on way?? like he sets up fwhip on the floor with some toys or a coloring book and proceeds to carry on with whatever kingly work he has to do. he hovers but tries not to make it clear that he's hovering, suggests colors for fwhip to use on parts of his drawing and comes in with curveballs for the toy stories, like "this lil fella is an EVIL ADVISOR!!" and fwhip gasps all dramatic, "no!! not the mermaid council!!"

i think they'd both end up small during caregiving sessions. that or they'd swap roles, joel starts caring for fwhip and then fwhip ends up caring for joel

empires 2:

fwhip is a cat or perhaps a squirrel regressor. shenanigans ensue

god joel regressing is a shock to everyone involved. lots of chill time and fwhip attempting to preen massive wings

#these are bad. i am sorry #teddy beloved #asks #ivorys headcanons #mumbo tag #martyn tag #joel tag #fwhip tag #mcyt agere

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bat-connoisseur · 1 year

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*sees your post about wanting to infodump about bats* Uh, um... What's the most <superlative> bat that you think should be talked about more? e.g. a lot of people know about smallest/biggest bat and everyone has opinions on ugliest/cutest but what's a new superlative to talk about? Alternately, what's YOUR opinion on ugliest/cutest that might not be The Bat Everyone Knows?

thank you SO much i can answer both of these.

I would like to share some silly bats i think. the silliest bats. that is my superlative. Here, take the Eastern Tube Nosed Bat.

horrendous. fantastic. why do they look like that.

they have some beautiful yellow spotting though. VERY cool.

There's also the hammerhead bat which is infamous because they look like this

but i bring them up because its just the males that look like that. The females look normal.

(a female as far as I can tell)

I think its really fucking funny that these guys have a 50/50 chance to be born and just look really fucking silly their whole lives.

As for the ugly/cute bats, I have a lot of opinions! The first being, yes, a lot of bats are ugly as sin. But that is a plus in my eyes. The uglier the better I say, even if they kind of look like they've been chewed on. An ugly bat is a marvel of evolution, the flaps largley being for hearing real good. That being said. here's an ugly fucker.

A Francis' Wolly Horseshoe bat I think?

also a wrinkle-faced bat because fucking look at it. This one's quite cute though.

As for cute bats. Well we all know about flying foxes. yeah they're really cute and pleasent looking animals. we all know this. Same goes for most fruit bats honestly. So here.

MASTIFF BAT!!!! Cute little fella. this one's flat :)

i was only gonna put one picture but then I saw this one going :D

i also need to shoutout my favourite bat, the Common Pipistrelle. Insectivores have a reputation for being the ugly ones but its just not true!!! they're cute as hell! they're just little guys!!

I'm also a 'vampire bats are cute' truther. Look at it!!!!! They're also so fucking cool. because of how they hunt they have so many unique adaptations. They can walk and gallop alongthe ground, something most bats really struggle to do. They can take off from the ground, launching themselves in a mechanism thought to be similar to the one pterosaurs used. They are such fascinating animals! Go watch a video of one wandering around. In fact I have one for you. A personal favourite (cw for blood because it is a captive bat having a little drink out of a bowl). look at the way it moves! Its cautious little sidestep!! Bats, especially vampire bats, are demonised as monsters who'll give you horrid diseases because they're evil but that just isn't true. they're animals. they do not bite you out of spite. they don't even know what a disease is. all they know is 'drink blood' and 'hang out with bat friends in cave'.

#Thank you!! it's always nice to have a reason to talk about them :> really needed it #long post #ask #leopardmask-ao3

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sleepystawbie · 7 months

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I bloody love spiders.

Silly little guys with the cutest legs that try so hard to live and they keep my house clean of bugs and I love them for it.

The cutest little legs and the silliest little butts, they walk so funny and climb the walls and live there.

Got one in my bathtub and one on my bedroom wall and one behind the tv. That’s just the big boiis, I got so many little guys skuttling around. One lives in my shower and I love him, such a good lil fella.

Anyway that’s it, I love spiders.

#for the love of spiders #spiders are friends #autumn means spiders

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theminecraftbee · 2 years

Note

so how is pancake the eldritch horror dragon doing in the Boatem Road Trip AU

"This is a really stupid plan."

"Do you have a better one, Mumbo?"

"I mean, no, why would I? I'm just saying that it's stupid. We can continue with it. We continue with a lot of stupid plans. I just wanted to make sure you knew."

"We know, so shut it!"

"You know, you're being rather mean, Grian. This is all very distressing."

"You two know you're not the ones actually doing this, right?"

Mumbo and Grian turn to Pearl. To Grian's chagrin, she's still the only one of them any good at turning off gravity. (He's. Fairly certain that name is incorrect, but it makes Mumbo cry every time he uses it, so he's going to keep calling 'moving in the void' that.) She'd tried to explain, but her explanation had been vague. Something about deciding she was the void, and deciding to be a void in a different place? And, look, Grian's fine enough at self-determination, right, but that seems like a bit much.

"Right. Sorry," Mumbo says. "This is a really stupid plan."

"Thanks," Pearl says.

"I personally think it's brilliant," Scar says.

"If you die we'll be really sad!" Impulse says, with far more glee than Grian thinks is really necessary.

"Right," says Pearl. "With that resounding vote of confidence, I can't possibly fail. See you in a few!"

She waves and then she -

Well, Grian's brain interprets it as Pearl walking, at least. Once again, the concept of 'movement' is a bit confusing and foreign. It requires admitting certain things to himself that he's not really ready for, he thinks. He can, however, watch Pearl move like a video game model with a walk cycle that doesn't quite match the speed of the movement, and which doesn't quite have enough weight to make it feel like anything is hitting the ground. Her feet are moving, but her body is - moving - and it is, frankly, one of the silliest things Grian has ever watched.

It does not take her long to reach the cows around them. That should probably be concerning, but Grian just feels -

"Pancake!" says Pearl, standing in front of the rolling masses of the creatures of the abyss, reaching towards her, surrounding her. "You've been very naughty, you know. Come on back! We have treats!"

Grian thinks he hears something. He gets the vague sense that, maybe, it should hurt his ears? He gets the vague sense a lot of things should hurt him right now, actually, but Grian just feels -

Pearl shifts strangely in the air. She turns to the cows and glares. They reel back slightly. She turns back to the abyss. "Come on now, Pancake. I know they look like family, but they're going to hurt you. We have cookies. Don't you want our delicious cookies?"

"Why was our plan to lie to the dragon again?" asks Impulse.

"I'm sure we can invent cookies. If nothing else we're surrounded by cows?" Scar says.

"Beef cookies?" Impulse says, almost offended.

"Shhhh," Grian hisses. "I can't believe this, but it's actually working!"

Sure enough, from the mass, comes Pancake. Pancake looks - scratched up, perhaps? Shaken? But the dragon goes to Pearl regardless, seemingly drawn in by the promise of cookies. Grian hears Pearl laugh as she grabs Pancake in her arms. "Oh, thank goodness! You gave us all quite the fright, little fella!"

"Pearl -" says Mumbo, strangled.

"You're never going to run off like that again, do you hear? Sweet little guy."

"Pearl," says Mumbo again, a bit louder.

"Now let's - oh dear."

At some point, though, while baiting the dragon with cookies that don't exist, Pearl had become surrounded.

Grian's heart pounds. How did Pearl do the moving trick? They did it once to go help Scar - even Grian had done it that time! He can do it again to go get to Pearl. He can do it again to get to her! This whole thing had been stupid, actually, they should have just - just left - no, Grian can't think of leaving even a baby dragon in this place, but -

What had Pearl done?

She'd given in, something in Grian says. She'd given in, and admitted there was not a 'her' left that wasn't the void, and chosen to move as though that was true.

But how does he do that? How do any of them -

Pearl stops flinching. She breathes out.

And suddenly, it is as thought Grian is cross-eyed, or maybe as though Grian's stopped seeing a veil that he chose to see the world with. The void is black, and it is empty. and they are also black and empty, simply spaces in the void, any meaningful solid thing of them already long eaten away, replaced with the Other. And oh, are they Other, and it is empty, the world is empty, and the emptiness is full of monsters, and the monsters are held in the embrace of nothingness.

And the nothingness tells Grian: you are me.

Grian couldn't scream if he wanted to, and oh, he wants to, because he doesn't want to be nothing, surrounded by hostile nothingnesses, and Pearl, Pearl must be something but for all he can see the borders of people, they are empty spaces with names, the way every part of the void is just a meaningless space with a name, and it is all him and he is meaningless in it. He wants to laugh hysterically, but he can't breathe or speak, because he doesn't need to!

And the nothingness is made of monsters. And the monsters are hungry. And Grian is hungry.

And the monsters reach for Pearl, but Pearl -

Pearl is hungry too.

And this great mass of nothingness and faint light that isn't a person, god none of them are people, they're all dead, the void having eaten them long ago, how long had it taken him to realize and he wants to scream wants to laugh wants to - he's dead they're all dead they're all the void they are all nothingness given a name, that emptiness, that lack of self, the lack of a person named Pearl reaches towards the monsters that the darkness is made of and it

eats.

She is not surrounded anymore.

And Grian can't force the veil back over his eyes as the nothingness named Pearl turns to him and the nothingnesses named for his friends (and they are all dead god they have to be, this is death, this is - if they have replaced themselves with emptiness what are they) and there is someone saying something and it sounds like someone he knows and -

- and -

- and Grian is hungry.

And the void is hungry, and they are the void.

And the nothingness tells Grian: you are me.

And Pearl tells Grian: "I don't know what I just - it's fine, see, I'm alive? I'm going to touch you, is that okay? I'm going to - I'm alive, we're alive, we're alive."

Nothingness cannot touch nothingness, but Grian forces his eyes to uncross as he hears Pearl's hands touch his. He forces himself to see everyone as people once again, even though he knows its a lie now. He feels Mumbo's hand on his shoulder, too, and Mumbo - Mumbo had talked like he'd always known. He can't shake it off. He's shaking. His ears are ringing.

There are probably more sensible things to say after breaking the veil of the universe on yourself, but what Grian says is this:

"Oh. So that's how you turned gravity off."

Pearl shrugs. "I mean. Probably not like that."

Everyone is quiet for a bit.

"You know, if the cows were trying to eat you, and you ate it instead," says Impulse. "Does that make you a cow?"

Everyone is quiet for a bit again, but this time with a distinctly incredulous air.

"Sure," Pearl finally says. "Why not."

"...the plan worked!" says Scar, far too bright for how any of them feel.

"So when do we explain to Pancake we lied?" asks Mumbo, and Pancake makes a startled snort.

The nothingness tells Grian: you are me.

Grian tells the nothingness: well it's not like that functionally changes much, now is it? Frankly, this revelation is horrifying and all, but at this point I'm sort of numb. At least it's not boring?

The nothingness says: well, fair enough I guess?

Grian turns back to the others. "I mean, the way I see it, since we have proof we can eat the horrifying monsters from beyond the mortal ken, there really is nothing stopping us from trying to make cookies or whatever."

"Do you know what a cookie is?" says Impulse, incredulously.

"You were eating rocks all season!"

They go back to normal.

#answered #prompt ficlets #the continued adventures of the boatem road trip #a bee fic #.........#well then. isn't that interesting?#this one is. yeah more horror than comedy.#whoops! had fun with it though.#cut's there for length and also because of the aformentioned horror #cosmic horror #existential horror #WHOOPS.#anyway technically the takeaway from this one while something that has been being built up to a little bit.#you can probably read the rest with a summary of this if you need to ask me for one there is a LOT of emphasis on 'nothingness'#if that is a thing that will bother you #OH RIGHT #derealization #that fits better than unreality here the intent is not unreality #but should probably be on this one too

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borathae · 2 years

Text

↳ Index [Chapter 08 - Prandiculum]

• Prandiculum (Latin, breakfast)

Pairing: slight Jimin x f.Reader, Taehyung x f.Reader

Warnings: suggestive themes, Jimin being a lot, blood drinking, Tae being angry, confusion

Wordcount: 5.3k

a/n: boy if you don’t-

You really like the songs of birds. You have always liked the songs of birds, even when you were a little girl – too naïve for the world and with far too much energy to spare – you really liked birds and their singing. It calmed you down, but also made you think of many amazing stories in your head. Most of the time those stories were about the topics those little fellas were singing about. Where the spots for catching worms were hidden in your garden, how the air all the way up in the sky felt like, or maybe just about how many people they have pooped on today. You had the silliest stories for every kind of bird and its melodies.

Now that you are all grown up – still maybe a little naïve but feeling far more tired than energetic – the music of birds reminded you of home. Your parent’s house is surrounded by a spacious garden, so your childhood was filled with happy whistling and little songs, hence the many stories. So whenever you are woken up by the songs of birds, you feel like you are back in your childhood bedroom, ready to start a new day of adventuring.

So when you open your eyes to a new day and don’t find yourself in your bedroom, you are confused. Now bear in mind, you hadn’t expected to wake up in your childhood bedroom, your mind was awake enough to realise that this was impossible. But you had expected to wake up in your apartment. White walls, which were slightly yellowed from all the previous people living in it, a big water stain on the left corner of the ceiling, the smell of your radiator heating up. But you weren’t greeted by those things, instead the clear blue sky greeted you.

You blink a few times, rubbing at your eyes when the image still remains.

“Huh.”

The sky is still here even after you rubbed your eyes. You look at your hands and start counting your fingers. You have more fingers in dreams, so your father always told you. You only have your required amount, not one more and not one less. So you aren’t dreaming. You are actually resting under a glass dome. Also what is that smell? Like old books and expensive wood?

You look around. A library.

“Oh!”

You must be stupid in sleep. You stayed over at Taehyung’s place, now you remember! This is his library, a secret he shared with you last night before you and him spent hours watching the stars and kissing until your lips were tender. You touch them, feeling your heart flutter. Last night was so amazing. He took you dancing, walked with you under the moonlight, showed you his most precious possessions and then told you that you are important to him under the starry sky and then fell asleep with you while you were resting in his arms.

You giggle, hiding your face behind your hands. Last night was epic.

Your gaze soon shifts to your side. You really wanted to get a glimpse of him. Taehyung. The man who makes you feel so loved.

“Huh?”

Taehyung was missing. His smell still lingered on the sheets, but he was nowhere to be seen. His side is cold to the touch. He must have left quite some time ago, leaving behind nothing more than a beautifully handwritten note.

“Good morning my sweetest, if you are reading this note then it must mean you have woken before I managed to return. Worry not, I have a few errands to run, but I will be reunited with you very soon. In the meantime please feel free to explore my library, however I must ask you not to leave my wing. It is important that you follow this rule. With deepest adoration, Kim Taehyung.”

You have to smile. He really has a poetic way with words. Sometimes you wonder if he is of another time. Perhaps he is a time traveller. You gasp. This would explain the portrait downstairs and the incredible similarities it shares with Taehyung. This would explain the way he always gives himself, how he dresses and speaks. This would explain why he owned so much money and why he had such an impressive collection of antiquities. Perhaps he is really a time traveller.

“No, don’t be stupid”, you say, giving your own cheek a little slap. There you go, making up silly stories about the man you fancy instead of what the birds are singing about.

You read the note a second time, putting it back down on its original place afterwards. Taehyung told you not to leave his wing, which was a peculiar request, but you figure that his roommates don’t know that you stayed overnight. He most definitely wants to save you from the awkward “did you guys have sex?” conversation one of them most likely would want to have with you. How very nice of him, you really weren’t in the mood for such conversation.

He also told you that you could look around his library. With a racing heart, you let your eyes travel over the countless rows of books. You have an entire library all to yourself.

You squeal, doing a little happy dance with your shoulders. This is like a dream come true.

Ever since you learned about the existence of libraries at the ripe age of four and a quarter years, your biggest dream was to spend a day locked up in one and getting lost in the books.

You like that today was that day.

Fixing the soft knitted jumper, Taehyung had hurried down to get you after you told him that you were chilly, you stand up and waddle over to the first of six bookshelves.

Taehyung had the most amazing collection of books. Mostly old classics and books filled with the most peculiar of knowledge and beautifully made art and photography collections. A majority of his books seemed to carry the weight of many years with them. The leather bounds are covered in fingerprints, the once white pages are yellowed and crinkly at the edges and a musky smell surrounded them. It was for someone like you, a total book nerd and lover of antique books, a goldmine. You must ask Taehyung for his sources once he comes back, you would love to stroll through whatever store he found them in.

Some books are written in languages unknown to you. You still skimmed through all of them, remembering pretty words to ask Taehyung about later. Some even carried letters foreign to you, they looked like pretty paintings to you. You really liked them, finding yourself smiling as you let your eyes travel over them.

One photography book caught your attention just a little longer than the rest of his collection. A photographer named Vante. A whole mystery surrounded him. Apparently he lived in the 1940s, never showed his face or revealed his real name, but loved to display his pictures in galleries. You let your thumb dance over a black and white picture of a scenic looking seaside. It is a pity really, you would have loved to know the face to those pictures. They are beautiful, carrying a certain tranquillity to them. What must he have thought whilst taking the picture? Perhaps he saw beauty in the ocean, perhaps he watched the sun reflect in the dancing surface of the water and thought that this is a view worth capturing for eternity. Perhaps he was filled with struggle, feeling lost in front of a sight so vast one could never capture it in its entirety. Perhaps he was filled with sadness, tasting the salt in the air and remembering all the times he tasted his salty tears on his lips. You drag your thumb over the horizon and sigh. Whatever he thought of and felt in that moment, the picture remaining makes you feel good inside.

You close the book, settling back on the armchair next to the fireplace. You eye the big pile of books, you had prepared to read and skim through.

“Which one of you beauties should I open next?” you murmur, leaning closer to the pile to read the titles, “oh? Le Petit Prince? Gosh, I haven’t read this in ages.”

So it was decided then. The Little Prince, with its beautifully hand-painted illustrations and moving story, would be your first book. It was written in French and in an accent you can’t quite understand completely. But you enjoyed it nonetheless, remembering words you couldn’t understand for later. Perhaps Taehyung can tell you what they mean. Your mind drifts off. Perhaps you could whisper them against his neck while he runs his fingers up and down your spine. Perhaps you could kiss his lips and taste his sigh whenever he taught you a new word. It would be such a lovely reward for you and him.

“Oh dear, I mustn’t think like that”, you whisper, touching the side of your neck shyly, “I should concentrate, read this book about plants instead.”

You open it.

“Oh wow, such pretty paintings”, you gasp, feeling yourself get pulled into the book.

You had just reached the third book – a book about Moroccan architecture – when your stomach rumbles so loudly you fear the entire town might have heard it. You look down at your tummy, touching it gently.

“I am so damn hungry, what the hell? What time is it?”

Your eyes widen. It is way past eleven, the clock on the wall tells you so. Which means, you spent hours upon hours getting lost in Taehyung’s library and books.

You sneak a glance at the mattress on which his note was still resting. He told you not to leave his wing, but it’s been hours already. If there was a possibility to meet his roommates in the kitchen, it surely must have passed by now. They are most definitely busy with something else, maybe riding their horses or doing whatever one does in such a big estate.

Maybe one little sneak down to the kitchen to get a snack won’t hurt.

You try to be as quiet as possible as you hurry through the estate. The door to the sitting room is open as you pass it. It seems to be empty when you sneak a glance inside.

The kitchen turns out to be at the very far end of the estate. You finally found it after opening far too many wrong doors. A few more sitting rooms, some locked rooms, far too many rooms with their windows boarded up and two toilets, also one ballroom. It looked eery with its blood red curtains drawn closed and the vast sunlight illuminating every particle of dust in the air, also you couldn’t see the end of the room as it drowned in darkness. You closed the door as quickly as possible, shivering.

To your luck, the kitchen was located only one sharp turn to the left up a spacious corridor. The door was open, silence seeped out of the room. You knock on the doorframe twice, waiting for an answer. Nothing comes.

So you decide to enter the room. It is empty, the counters are cleaned, so is the dining table. As you had expected, his roommates already ate breakfast. Perfect. Now you just need to be quiet in preparing a snack and a cup of tea and it will be as if you never even left Taehyung’s wing in the first place.

“Now, where do you guys keep your kettle?” you mumble, rummaging through their cupboards. They own surprisingly little dishes. Most of the cupboards are empty. Weird, you would have thought that in an estate like this, they would have an impressive collection of the most expensive porcelain as well.

Perhaps they have their own room for that and this is merely the kitchen to prepare the food. You wouldn’t even be surprised if that was the case.

“Aha! There you are.”

They did own a water kettle however. It smelled old and unused, which was once again very unusual. As you cleaned it, dust even darkened the water. It was peculiar really, but not as peculiar as the contents of their fridge. Empty. Not even condiments like ketchup or mustard, were stored in the fridge. You stick your hand inside.

“It’s not even on”, you observe and close it, “okay am I in the wrong kitchen?”

“No you are not.”

You screech, fearing that your heart might give up in your chest. You whip around, meeting the eyes of none other than Park Jimin. He is sitting on the kitchen island with his legs crossed and his chest exposed in the thin rope he is wearing.

“Dear lord. What’s with all that yelling?” he asks nonchalantly, bobbing his left foot up and down.

You press your hand over your racing heartbeat, “holy moly, I think you just gave me a heart attack.”

He chuckles, “aww I’m sorry. Did I scare you?”

“Yes you did. You appeared out of nowhere like a freaking ghost, it scared me.”

He chuckles again before he smirks in amusement.

“I’ve been here all along. I don’t know how you could miss me”, he says, jumping off the counter he had previously been sitting on.

“N-no I-“, you twist and turn, “-I checked the kitchen, it was totally empty when I entered it.”

“Well, you must have missed a spot”, he says, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.

You are left blinking in disbelief. He wasn’t in the kitchen when you entered. You know that he wasn’t because you checked every inch of it thoroughly. How is that possible?

“You smell of Taehyung”, Jimin states.

“E-excuse me?”

“His scent is on you”, he explains, taking a deep breath, “dear lord he did proper work, it’s almost overpowering yours. That's why I couldn’t locate you at first.”

“What are you talking about?” you ask, smelling your own arm. Yes, the jumper you were wearing was one of Taehyung's and it did smell like him, but it wasn’t so strong that you felt overpowered by it.

“Doesn’t matter”, Jimin dismisses you, shrugging his shoulders, “I see that you are making yourself some tea. That’s a good choice. I am more of a coffee guy myself.”

“Uhm…uh…yeah, I never really got into coffee”, you mumble, still trying to figure out how the hell Jimin was in the kitchen. Or how he found Taehyung’s scent to be overpowering. Or how he is able to smell him so clearly in the first place. Or why he wanted to locate you by scent.

“I see, you and Taetae have something in common so it seems.”

“Taetae?”

“That is what I call Taehyung”, Jimin explains, turning the coffee machine on, “don’t tell him that I told you, he thinks the nickname to be embarrassing.”

“Uh, yeah. Sure, I won’t”, you mumble, scratching the back of your neck. Why do you feel so jittery all of a sudden? Your hands are all clammy too.

“Speaking of Taehyung. Did you stay here tonight?”

“Yes, uhm, yes I did.”

“I see….” a pause then a weirdly long sigh, “…oh he takes such good care of me….”

“W-what?”

Jimin turns around, dirty smirk on his face.

“Nothing” he lets his eyes travel up and down your body, “am I making you nervous ___?”

“No”, you chuckle nervously, “I’m just confused.”

Jimin cocks an eyebrow up at you and smirks. Your stomach feels funny, like really funny. There is desire in it. The desire to run your hands up and down his naked torso. Why? You don’t want to and yet your body does.

You draw closer all on your own.

“What are you confused about?” he rasps, grabbing your chin between two of his fingers.

Holy shit you want him so bad. What? You blink in confusion, your throat constricting. No you don’t want him and neither do you want him to touch you like that. At least you are pretty sure that you don’t want that. So why are your knees turning into literal puddy right now?

“Jimin I-“, you choke out, fingers itching with the desire to reach out.

He lets go of you and takes a step back.

“Anyways. What would you like to have to your tea? Crumpets or scones?” he says and turns away.

You clear your throat, gasping for air. This was so weird. What just happened?

“S-scones please”, you whisper, staring at him with big eyes.

Why are you so goddamn wet between the legs? What the hell? You were normal before you talked to Jimin. Hungry yes, but normal. What is this sorcery?

Jimin turns the oven on and turns to look at you, dark smirk appearing on his face.

“Are you sure you are okay? You look terribly shaken.”

“I’m okay just...feeling a little weird.”

“Weird? Is it because of me?”

Jimin steps closer, reaching out to touch your wrist. You step back, gasping when he pulls you back to him.

“Your pulse is racing”, he observes and lifts up your hand to turn it. It is resting in his palm, finger closed on instinct as Jimin lets his own travel over the veins in your wrist.

“I can feel it”, he whispers and presses his finger closer, “it’s the strongest here and oh? It just jumped as I touched the spot.”

Your knees are wobbling, your head is spinning. Is he a sorcerer? Perhaps he is. Taehyung is the time traveller and Jimin is the witcher, equipped with powers of seduction. You should think him to be weird – and you do – but more than anything else you think him to be so temptatious that you want to scream.

“What are you doing to me?” you ask hoarsely.

His eyes meet yours, they have darkened quite a bit. A sly smirk tugs at his plumb lips.

“I’m not doing anything”, he breaks away, giving you a moment of breath.

You wheeze and stumble, finding support on the edge of the kitchen island. You hadn’t even realised how little air was left in your lungs until he finally stepped back.

“Oh god, what’s wrong with me?” you choke out.

“You must have low blood sugar”, he says and steps closer, “come sit down on the counter and I will prepare the food.”

"No, no uhm. I should go. Taehyung’s probably back already", you stutter.

He lifts you up and sits you down before you could even turn to leave, keeping himself pressed close to you once you are seated. His hands are lingering on your hips, his eyes are glued to your lips. Oh god, what is happening? What is he doing to you? Why do you want him so bad? You are dating his best friend and you like dating Taehyung, you shouldn’t have such desires. And you know that you don’t have such desires. What is he doing to you?

“Do you want to kiss me ___?” he rasps and draws closer.

“Yes”, your tongue worked without your consent, exposing you and him to a truth you didn’t even know you possessed.

“So why don’t you?”

“Because you’re his friend and he is my boyfriend.”

“So you made it official? Did he ask you to be his’?”

“N-no but – “, your voice cuts off as Jimin grabs you by the back of your head.

You fight against him, “no, I shouldn’t do this.”

“You’re not official and Taetae has never been one to keep his lovers to himself. Come on ___ let me get a taste of you”, he coos, ghosting his pillowy lips over the shell of your ear.

“I don’t want to”, you choke out, feeling your body draw closer to his’ on its own.

Jimin purrs deeply, massaging your hips.

“You offend me ___, am I really that repulsive?” he asks, sucking on the sensitive skin of your neck gently.

“No, no I don’t know. Gosh I don’t know”, you say, panting for air, “I don’t know. Jimin please stop.”

He sighs and pulls back. He carries disappointment in his eyes as he reaches out to pat the top of your head.

“Very well, you bore”, he mumbles and turns his back to you, “don’t move I’ll get you breakfast”, he tells you, leaving the kitchen through a door, which you hadn’t even seen before.

You fix the collar of your jumper, feeling close to passing out. What is wrong with you? You want Jimin with every fibre in your body, but you know that this is wrong. The worst part is knowing that before you talked to Jimin, you didn’t want him one bit, not even a little. What did he do to you? What is your problem? And most importantly why can’t you move?

“Now ___, tell me”, Jimin enters the room again, carrying groceries, “do you like sausage?” he asks, placing them on the counter and looking over his shoulder.

What is going on with you? You were so happy that you weren’t feeling so crazy anymore and yet here you were, feeling crazy again.

“___”, he calls your name and with it your attention.

“Yeah?” you look at him, coughing to get rid of that funny feeling in your chest.

“I asked you if you wanted some eggs to your sausage”, he says.

“S-sure thank you”, you mumble, nodding your head.

“Wonderful”, he smiles, “would you mind handing me that knife over there?”

“Knife”, you repeat, jumping off the counter and waddling to the knife stand with your eyes focused on it. He wants a knife, you need to get a knife. Bring Jimin a knife. That's what you need to do.

“Which one? This one?” you ask as you pull the biggest of them free.

“Exactly, you are a treasure”, he says, opening his palm for you to place the knife in.

He pulls it from your hand.

“Ouch, oh shit”, you hiss, hand flinching back when you feel the sharp burn of getting cut.

“Oh dear! I am so sorry, did I cut you?” Jimin exclaims, rushing to your side.

“Ah”, you inhale sharply, “yeah, ouchies that burns.”

“Let me see”, he says, taking your hand gently.

You open your palm to him, revealing the deep cut he left on the spot between your thumb and pointer finger. Blood had collected on the palm.

“Aaah, that must hurt. I feel so terrible”, he says, “wait, let me clean this for you quickly.”

“No it’s not that bad, I can- oh? W-what are you doing?”

Jimin looks up at you, eyes dark and dangerous. He has his lips around your cut, lapping at it rather hungrily. You swallow, eyes glued to his lips.

“No, don't do that. This is so disgusting. I can clean it myself”, you say, wanting to pull your hand away.

Jimin doesn’t let you, tightening his fingers around your wrist. He grunts and starts sucking harshly.

“Jesus chill, w-what are you doing?”

It stings as if you were cut a second time. You whine, wanting to pull away.

“Let, let go of me. What are you doing?”

Jimin moans, closing his eyes as he sucks even harder.

“Please let go. T-this is weird”, you plead and Jimin squeezes your wrist in warning.

“Jimin!” Taehyung's angry voice bounces off the walls.

Jimin lets go of your hand, licking his lips almost as if he had enjoyed what had just happened. There are two little puncture holes next to your cut.

“What the hell are you doing?!” Taehyung yells.

He is by Jimin's side in an instant, grabbing the other man by his collar and almost lifting him off the floor. Jimin merely cackles.

“What’s your problem Taehyung? You don’t like that I tasted your little human before you?” he challenges.

What the hell is he saying? Tasting you? His little human?

“Don’t make me hurt you Jimin”, Taehyung warns in a deep growl.

Why is he so angry? Why does he want to hurt his friend?

“What is happening?” you ask.

Taehyung lets go of Jimin and places his hand on your shoulder.

“Go to my room. Now”, he orders you with his fingers on your chin.

“Okay”, you say without wanting to, nodding your head obediently.

Your legs move on their own. You don’t want to walk. What is happening? Why are you leaving? What is happening?

“Have you gone mad? You’re protecting her?” you hear Jimin bark and yet you can’t turn around. You really want to turn around and check what they were doing, but you can’t. You need to go to Taehyung's room. He told you so.

You sit on the bed when Taehyung opens the door and slams it closed. He looks angry and judging by his ruffled hair something must have happened downstairs. There are red stains on his shirt. As someone who has had to suffer through her period ever since she was thirteen, you know exactly what type of red stains are on his shirt. Blood.

“Hey, you alright? Are you bleeding? Did Jimin hurt you?” you are on your feet and by his side in an instant.

You try to cup his cheek and check for wounds, but Taehyung flinches back.

“Don’t touch me”, he spits. He bumps his shoulder with you as he hurries to the bathroom. It hurts for a moment.

“Hey! What’s your problem?” you hurry after him.

Taehyung takes his shirt off and throws it into the laundry bin. He bends over the sink, muscles in his back flexing as he pants in anger. The tips of his fingers turn white from how tightly he clutches the marble.

“What was this all about? Why did you tell me to go to your room?”

“Because you weren’t supposed to leave it in the first place!” Taehyung yells, whipping around.

You stumble back, shocked to see such anger on his face.

“I told you! Do not leave my wing without me! I gave you one simple rule to follow and yet you were incompetent to do so!”

“Don’t yell at me”, you say quietly, feeling so close to crying, “I don’t like it when people yell at me”, you choke out.

Taehyung wanted to say something but quickly closes his mouth. He takes a deep breath.

“Urgh!” he exclaims and whips back around.

For a moment it looked like he wanted to punch the mirror, but as he heard you squeak in fear and your eyes met in the reflection, his hand stopped a mere hairs width away from the glass. He grabs the sink, dark hair hanging into his angry eyes.

“Come here”, he presses out through gritted teeth.

“What?”

“I said, come here.”

You stumble closer, shivering in fear. You stand beside him in silence, watching him take heavy breaths. Then, out of nowhere, he turns his head, dark eyes flitting down to your hand.

“Show it to me.”

“What?”

“Your hand, show it to me.”

You lift it hesitantly. He grabs it roughly and pulls you closer.

“Open it.”

You follow, hating your fingers for shaking. Your blood had smeared all over your palm, tainting the underside of your nails a dark, almost brown, red. You have no idea why you haven’t cleaned it already, but something inside of you stopped you from doing so. Taehyung inspects it with a clenched jaw.

“Does it hurt?” he asks coldly, eyes flitting up to meet yours.

You swallow, nodding your head slowly.

He grinds his teeth and exhales loudly through his nose.

“Damn it ___”, he whispers deeply, turning on the water and pulling your hand underneath.

“Ouch! Oh god, that burns”, you gasp.

“I have to clean it.”

“But, but it hurts.”

He sighs and turns off the water, reaching for a clean towel. He pats your hand dry gently, soaking the towel with the new blood leaking from your wounds. You stare at the puncture wound.

“Did Jimin bite me?” you ask quietly.

“No. You’re just imagining it.”

“But those two dots and, and I felt a really sharp pain when he, he licked me.”

“It’s nothing”, he says with his voice vast of emotion.

“But Taehyung – “

“It’s nothing”, he insists, louder than before.

“I don’t understand. I, I feel so weird and, and I don’t know what is happening to me.”

“Nothing, you’re just in shock.”

“No, it can’t be. My mind is all hazy and foggy and my body does things I don’t want to do. Taehyung it is like that one time you met me at the park, but even more intense.”

“So you are sleep deprived. There. You have your answer.”

“But I slept well and –“

“Forget it ___, you are sleep deprived and have low blood sugar. You are fine”, he spits, sending you a warning glare.

You close your mouth, feeling tears prickle at your eyes. He breaks the eye contact with an exhausted sigh.

"I'm just so confused. I, I can’t explain half of the things I saw today and most of the things Jimin said make no sense to me. Taehyung if you know something then-"

"I don't, Jimin just likes to mess with people because he is a prick", he forces out.

He opens his mirror cabinet and pulls out a white, clean roll of bandages. He opens it with his teeth, spitting the ripped plastic into the sink and grabs your wrist again to pull you closer.

“Hold still, I’ll wrap it up”, he explains.

He works quickly and without much delicacy. You know that he is only taking care of you because he feels it to be his responsibility and not because he genuinely wants you to feel better.

“Are you angry at me Tae?” you ask, dreading his answer.

Taehyung sighs and finishes tightening the bandages. He drops your hand and lifts his head. His eyes are burning in anger as he looks at you.

“I called you a cab, it will arrive in ten minutes”, he growls through gritted teeth.

“Wait. What?” you gasp, “I don’t understand. Are you sending me away?”

“It’s for the best”, he murmurs as he walks past you.

“What the hell? Why? What did I do?” you follow him outside, “are you seriously angry at me for leaving your wing?”

“I told you not to, didn’t I? You had my library and my entire collection of books to pass the time with and yet you couldn’t follow one simple rule”, he growls, stomping to his walk-in dressing room. You follow him, eyes wide in confusion and head hurting from everything that had happened ever since you made the terrible mistake of leaving his wing.

“I was hungry”, you defend yourself, “and the kitchen was empty when I first entered it. I just wanted to get a quick snack and a cup of tea to drink whilst reading. Why are you so mad?”

Taehyung puts on a clean shirt, fixing his hair afterwards. He tugs the thin material into his pants, working aggressively as he does.

“Because you disobeyed me.”

“Disobeyed you? Excuse me? Am I your servant or something?”

“I gave you one rule!” Taehyung whips around, nostrils flared in anger, “do you even know what he would have done to you if I hadn’t walked in? Do you really think one bite would have satisfied him? Is your life of such little importance to you?”

“What? What are you saying? So he, he did bite me?”

“Urgh”, he forces out, stomping out of the dressing room in big steps.

He is pacing up and down in front of his bed when you finally join him, hands in his hair and jaw clenched.

“What did I do? Taehyung what did I do?” you ask, feeling like your head might explode, “please tell me what is happening. I-I’m so confused.”

“Listen ___”, Taehyung is by your side within the blink of an eye.

“What the? How did you get here so fast?”

He ignores your questions and tilts your head up by your chin instead.

“It’s best if you leave now, the cab is here.”

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weirdmarioenemies · 3 years

Text

Name: Scutlet

Debut: Mario & Luigi: Bowser’s Inside Story

Sometimes all you need in life is a silly cartoon bug, and lucky for you, this is exactly what we have here!

First you draw a circle, then you add 2 silly googly eyes, then just add 6 very stubby legs, and voila! The ideal organism in the palm of your hand! The extreme flatness is optional, but highly recommended.

This is Scutlet! A very special little creature from the Mario Universe, you see, this guy is both a regular enemy AND a boss, and it’s not like alternate forms or anything, it’s the exact same creature! But it’s the perspective that changes!

Mario & Luigi first meet them when Bowser accidentally inhales one, and it gets stuck in his Flame Pipe (the part of his respiratory system that allows him to breathe fire). It is up to the brothers to dislodge the little guy so that Bowser can burn things again, but the brothers are also very very tiny, and this normally tiny bug is intimidatingly big. For Scutlet (Boss), your player characters are nothing but little mite snacks.

And treat you as snacks they will! BOOM! Secret Yoshi Tongue! Did anyone see it coming? I know I didn’t! And I was so delighted by this surprise! How to make a silly cartoon bug even better? Just add a comically long Yoshi tongue! Perfect! Scutlet will use this tongue to slurp up Starlow! Now it’s personal! So Mario and a very frightened Luigi fight Scutlet in an epic boss fight.

Scutlet is more cunning than their looks might make you think, they didn’t just swallow Starlow, instead, they weaponize her!! Flinging her at the bros using their tongue, if you try counterattacking, you’ll hurt Starlow, but if you do nothing, you’ll get hurt! A conniving little funny bug this flat fella turned out to be! They also have an attack where they burst from the flame pipe into the air and then fall like a paper sheet, I mention this because it is very important to point out the devs are keenly aware of this guy’s incredible levels of flatness, and are willing to use it as a mechanic.

Much later in the game, where Mario & Luigi get the ability to leave Bowser’s Body and explore the Mushroom Kingdom, they can find hundreds of Scutlets out in the wild. They attack in numbers! In tightly organized formations to be more specific! They arrange themselves in arrows and circles, indicating where they’ll be attacking! Clearly, these are highly advanced social creatures! That explains why the boss one was so cunning and smart I suppose. Must’ve developed a complex brain to organize and plan out attacks.

Say your prayers Mario, they have set their sights on you.

But they are still very tiny and silly, I cannot emphasize this enough, they are arguably one of the tiniest and silliest creature in the Mario universe. Maybe too tiny in fact, Bowser can also encounter them but he cannot fight them, as he’s just too big and just stomps them when getting close to one, instead of triggering a battle. I was quite upset when I accidentally did that, I’m sorry little one…

Look at them they’re in a circular conga line!

Seeing such context for a little creature is so cool I think, they’re just not a character made up to be a boss, it’s just one of them that happened to get stuck, but they belong to a species that’s out there and lives a non-boss life, with their other silly little bug friends! And they’re out there if you wanna find one! Just thread carefully around them please.

They are tiny....

#Scutlet #mario enemies #mario & luigi: bowser's inside story #m&l rpgs #m&l: bis #mod sockop #Please take care of these sweet little scuttlers they're doing their best

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thatmexisaurusrex · 2 years

Note

29 Please!!! 😍😍😍 for the February prompts. Thank you!💜

Awww, thank you so much for the prompt, @elektraking! 🥺

Date 6 of 28: Model Clothes for Each Other

| - 5 - | - Prompt - | - 7 - |

A soft lilac velour suit with burgundy accents. Light pink shirt under with burgundy accents as well. Sam awkwardly adjusting the cufflinks like anything could look bad on him. Fiddling, looking at a few rings to the side trying a few different ones out on his fingers to see what compliments the outfit. Adding earrings.

"You look great," said Bucky, as if Sam could ever look bad.

Sam could be wearing a giant hotdog suit and be killing fellas and dames left and right.

Sam looked at Bucky as if all he said were lies.

Bucky sighed, pouring a champagne glass for Sam, handing it over to Sam.

"Seriously," said Bucky, helping with the cufflinks, giving Sam a kiss, "You look like a total dreamboat."

They needed to figure out outfits. They were invited to a huge charity ball in New Orleans to help local and underfunded queer youth centers and Sam had been stressing out about what to wear, how to present himself so that he made a good impression and the shelters got as much funding as they could through the shmoozefest.

Bucky had talked to the stylist they had been working with and had convinced the man to leave all the options with Bucky. Bucky was going to make this fun. So he situated their living room like it was some sort of bridal shop, got champagne and everything, and was having them both put on a show for each other.

"Look. I'll just go in my underwear. I'll be the distraction," said Bucky, not really sure if anyone would pay attention to him with Sam looking drop-dead gorgeous right next to him, even if Bucky was in Bucky Bear briefs, "I'll make the sacrifice. I'm old enough to get away with doing whatever I want."

Sam hid his face in Bucky's shirt, giggling.

"You are not going in underwear," said Sam, moving away as he downed that entire champagne glass, "You're trying clothes on too."

"Want me to doll up for you?" said Bucky, winking, "I can doll up for you, sweetheart."

Bucky poured more champagne into Sam's glass, stripping out of his clothes with goofy flare as he walked over to the racks, waggling his eyebrows as he went.

"Stahp that," said Sam, "You're the silliest man I know."

"Thank you, I'm so honored," said Bucky, grabbing clothes at random, finding himself in a vibrant tartan check suit jacket composed of sky blue, daisy yellow, and hot pink paired with a black turtleneck and salted caramel slacks, a fancy yet minimalist belt, glancing over at Sam.

Sam looked unamused.

"I hate you," said Sam, taking a sip of his champagne, "You look good in everything and I hate you."

Bucky walked over to Sam, pulling Sam into a hug, Sam feeling like a huffy cat.

"I love you," said Bucky, "You look good in everything and I love you."

Sam groaned.

"Okay. So I might love you. A little," said Sam, Bucky snorting, "But it's still not fair."

"More like, it's unfair for everyone around us," said Bucky, "We're going to be the best looking couple at this charity ball."

Sam relaxed into the hug, wrapping his arms around Bucky.

"Thanks for doing this for me," said Sam, "I really appreciate it."

"Anything for you," said Bucky, kissing Sam's forehead, "Even me going in my underwear."

"You're not going in your underwear," said Sam, devolving into a fit of laughter, "Stop suggesting you go in your underwear."

"Just saying," said Bucky, loving how it made Sam laugh harder, "It's an option."

❤️ ❤️ ❤️

Want to choose a date for Sam and Bucky to go on during this special February Daily SamBucky Fluff Diary event? Check out the prompts here and send me an ask! I’ll write you a drabble as one of my Daily SamBucky Fluff Diaries!

#thank you so much for the prompt elektraking!!! 🥺🥰#sambucky #the daily sambucky fluff diary #sam wilson #bucky barnes #sambucky drabble #28 short sambucky dates #date 6 #model clothes for each other #bucky keeps suggesting that he goes in his underwear #and sam keeps telling him no while laughing #and sam feels better about dressing up #and bucky's happy sam feels better #domestic sambucky #domestic fluff #my drabbles #my headcanons

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