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anasanthology · 10 months

Text

Always Close Your Tabs.

WARNINGS: NSFW 18+ MDNI (I don’t care who reads just if your account age is set to under 18 don’t interact please), step-cest, pseudo-incest, stepbrother/stepsister pairing, degradation kink, light face slapping, very light praise kink, Dom/Sub, lowkey Hard Dom!Leon Kennedy, face fucking, oral (m receiving), mean Leon (I feel he’s a little ooc), like one mention of breeding kink, we got a little sweet aftercare at the end, not as tame as other stuff I’ve written, fem-specific gendered terms. Not proofread.

Notes: FIRST LEON FIC I’M POSTING 😚 actually feeling kinda good about this one! I felt like finishing this and posting it today so here so go!!! I hope you like it ☺️ as always, likes and—especially—comments are very VERY much appreciated 😌 if you have any tags you think I should add just tell me cause I’m not sure if I missed any 🧐 ANYWAYS, enjoy, lovelies 💕

4.5k words | Leon Kennedy x AFAB!Reader

The couch was irritating you, you were hyper aware of it, the texture, the firmness, everything about it. It didn’t matter where you sat though, everywhere was irritating. Everything was irritating. Your parents were out of town on some dumb anniversary. No. Your parent and her husband. Leaving you home alone with your stepbrother.

Leon.

He was annoying. He was rude, crass, and bitchy. When your mom had told you she was seeing a guy you were happy for her, until she told you that he had a son a few months older than you. Other kids was the one dealbreaker for you, but your mom loved this man so much and you didn’t exactly have much time left to live with her. You could deal with it. So you met Leon, he didn’t talk the entire dinner but to introduce himself and then order something. This was 8 months ago.

Now you live with him.

You were sure that there were worse people to live with, like… Bundy or Dahmer maybe. He always had those loudmouth friends of his over. Chris, who would spend the whole time yelling at the tv and Luis, who would just flirt with you the whole time. The worst of it was that they would only hang out in the living room so you were always confined to your room till they left. That was unless you wanted to hear, ‘ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! THAT DIDN’T EVEN TOUCH ME,’ and, ‘Hola, señorita, ¿Qué pasa? You look gorgeous,’ which… you didn’t wanna hear that. Not to even mention how insufferable he was when they weren’t around. Which was the situation now. Sitting on the couch next to you was Leon Kennedy, staring up at the tv watching Desperate Housewives. He had this constant resting dick face that never seemed to go away, and along with that he also seemed to be followed by resting dick air everywhere he went. Especially now that his dad took away his phone and other electronics before your guys’ parents left for their trip. Because apparently that man cared jack shit for your sanity. Now, Leon was irritated. He was insufferable when he was irritated. It just radiated off of him and you were a porous permeable surface. You guys sat like that until…

“Can I use your laptop?”

“What?” You turned to him, his words bringing you out of your thoughts.

“Can I use your laptop?” He repeated himself.

“Uh… sure, I guess?” Shrugging you got off the couch before stopping in your tracks and pointing at him, “but I get to use your car!” Your eyes widen with excitement and you point at him.

“No, no way. You are not driving my car. Not gonna happen.” He huffed in amusement and shook his head.

“And why not?” Your hands went to your hips and you made a face.

“Because,” he mocks your tone, “you’ll crash it.”

“Says you! Leon, you are like the king of bad driving. You hit a tree last month! A tree! They don’t even move and they’ve been there for like years!” Your hands were flying everywhere at this point. You had your license, but since Leon was a little older and got his a little before you he got a car. And since he got a car—and only Jeff Bezos could comfortably pay for his car insurance—you didn’t get one, you had to share with your mom and stepdad. But since they were halfway across the country, you were stuck here.

“It was in my blind spot!”

“What about that mailbox last week? Or Ms. Anderson’s side mirror? Everything can’t be in your blind spot, Leon. That’s what windows are for.” you close your eyes and sigh, “you know what, I don’t care. Bottom line is, if you don’t let me drive your car, no laptop.” You knew you were reaching, but you didn’t care. It’s not like you lost anything if he said no. It wasn’t fair he got the car anyways, your mom promised you a year ago on your birthday that when you got your license she’d take you to a used car dealership and you could pick one. But apparently ‘situations change’ and ‘things don’t always go as planned’, so you were left having to explain to your friends that it actually wasn’t gonna happen. Leon could practically burn holes through your face with the way he was looking at you, honestly that’s probably what he was thinking about. He sighs and closes his eyes.

“Fine.” He opens his eyes and gives you just about the brattiest look imaginable. You just smile and giggle. Your eyes widened in surprise. You were not expecting him to actually say yes.

“Okay!” You practically sprint upstairs to your room, grabbing your laptop off the bed. You make your way back downstairs and bring it to him. “Here ya go!”

“Thanks.” He takes it with a scowl and gets up.

“Whaddya need it for anyways?”

“Because I wanna watch stuff.” He responds flatly.

“What kinds of stuff?” ‘Porn?’ Was your first thought, but you opted not to verbalize that.

“Stuff you can’t watch on the tv?”

“Yes.”

“Why not?” You blinked at him.

“Because you’re watching the tv in here, dingus.” He didn’t look guilty. You know, like you would if you were gonna use your stepsister’s laptop to watch porn off of. He just looks annoyed. “Can I go watch some shit now or you gonna keep interrogating me, detective?”

“Jeez, moody. Sure, go.” You shoo him and turn back to the tv as you sit on the couch. He walks away to his room and you lay back covering your face with your arm. It felt like a weight had been lifted, the tension gone immediately. Part of you wanted to say it was just because he made the air so thick with irritation he could suffocate a room, but you knew that wasn’t completely true…

Leon was hot, like crazy hot.

It was frustrating being around that all day and night. Eating dinner across from an actual model… not easy. It was especially not easy when that model was a sarcastic asshole, and it was especially especially not easy when you kinda liked it. Yes every comment pissed you off, made you want to scream sometimes, punch a hole in the wall. but it also had you wondering… ‘would he… I mean in bed did he…’ god you hoped so. ‘Ew, no you didn’t.’ It was dumb—and entirely inappropriate—but that’s all you could think about when he was around. At some point all the irritation and hatred you had for him just living here, turned into… something you shouldn’t think about.

But who cares.

You didn’t have time to think about that. You had much more pressing matters to attend to, like… desperate housewives. You sit up and lay your body on top of your legs like you were folding yourself in half. You looked up at the screen and flipped onto your back kicking your legs over the back of the couch. It was like you just couldn’t get comfortable no matter what.

“Mmmmmuuhhhhhh.” Sighing you sat back up like normal, pulling the blanket off the back of the couch and onto your tired form. And then it hit you.

The computer.

‘Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit.’ Standing up abruptly you started making your way to Leon’s room, practically running up the stairs.

You were tired last night. Really, really tired.

So maybe, just maybe, you forgot to close out of a tab last night. Or maybe a couple. Besides it is your computer, why do you need to close out of anything? You don’t, or at least you don’t when your step brother isn’t using your computer.

“Leon, I need my computer.” You knocked at his door and turned the knob quickly. Locked, of fucking course. “Leon?” Bouncing around a little on the balls of your feet, impatiently you step back from the door and shake the tension out of your hands. ‘Maybe he didn’t see it. Maybe he… didn’t even get on the computer yet. “Leon, I don’t… I don’t need your car. It’s fine, I asked Claire and she said she’d drive me this week.” His door opens like that’s exactly what he was waiting to hear.

“Okay, fine. Take it.” He steps away from the door and you walk inside, looking back at him you take extra attention to his expression. He definitely knows. You just turn back unable to think about that for too much longer, your face burning with heat as you pick up your laptop off of his bed. You feel a pair of hands snake around your waist and you tense up. “But first, I have to know why my slutty little sister thought it was a good idea to give me her laptop with porn open.” It was like your brain took a screenshot. ‘Did he just…’

“I don’t… Leon, I’m sorry. I didn’t-I forgot.”

“Oh you’re such a liar.” You could hear the smirk in his voice. “No, I think you did it on purpose. You’re such a smart girl, I don’t believe you could be so stupid.” Your breath got heavier at his accusation.

“Look, I’m sorry, okay? I fell asleep ‘nd forgot it was on there.” He didn’t respond but his hands started running up and down your sides. “Leon, stop teasing me.” Your voice came out just a whiny whisper, sounding a lot more needy rather than urgent like you meant it.

“You know, I wouldn’t have guessed you’d be into that sort of stuff. Always get so nervous when Luis flirts with you, always get so flustered when people touch each other in a movie.” He was ignoring your request completely. “But it makes sense now, you get all shy cause you like it.” Your eyes widen and you squirm in his arms, not exactly trying to get away. Not really trying to get away at all actually. “Wonder how many times I’ve been sitting with you on the couch while your cunt gets all wet. So shameless, darling.” Your body is frozen in embarrassment, it’s kinda hot. ‘God. Don’t think like that Jesus.’

“No, never,” Liar. “Leon, I’m sorry, I really didn’t mean for this to happen.”

“Yet you aren’t trying to stop me, are you?” His voice is so completely self assured and cocky. Asshole. It made you so wet. You aren’t trying to stop him. You don’t want him to stop, even though you should. He pulls his hands back a little for you, so that if you want to get out you can. Without as much internal protest as you’d hoped, you stay completely still. “See, I was right. You are just a little slut who wants to get touched by her stepbrother.” You visibly cringe at that but feel slick spill into your panties at his words.

“Stop.”

“Stop what?” His hands go back around you, pulling you close to him. You could feel the outline of his hardened cock against you.

“Stop… being weird.” You shifted around in his arms.

“How am I being weird?” He snickered.

“Because you’re… stop saying it like that?” Your face was burning at this point. He was pushing up against you, pressing your hips against the edge of his bed.

“Saying it like what? Isn’t that exactly what’s going on? A dumb whore getting wet for her brother?”

“Leon.” His hand dipped down the front of your pants, running his finger down your clothed slit.

“Oh but why? It feels like you like it when I talk to you like that. I mean… given the videos you were watching, I bet you like it.” You pushed up against him. You just want him closer, it doesn’t matter if it’s wrong. He knew what he was doing, making you feel small, degrading you. “You do like it, fuck.” He started grinding himself against your back. You did like it, you wanted him to keep going, keep making you feel small.

“No it… Leon, it’s weird.”

“I know it is, but you like it. You like how depraved it makes you feel. You can’t deny it, I quite literally have seen the stuff you watch to get off.” He was laughing a little, it only amplified how hot and humiliating this was. “Can’t say I haven’t thought about it. Everytime you’d roll your eyes when I’d tease you all I could think about was taking it further, pinning you against the counter or the couch and just telling you anything I could think of.”

“Thought you said you didn’t think I’d be into this?”

“You can be into anything I want you to in my fantasies.” His other hand snakes up to start running his thumb up and down the column of your throat. This really should not have such an effect on you, but it does. Your eyes flutter and you let out a soft needy breath as you lay your head back against him. “Oh you like that? You like that I just imagine you in any position I want?” You nod your head reluctantly. Your lips open and close but no sound comes out. He’s barely even touched you but it feels like your tongue is twisted up in your mouth. You can feel your resolve just slipping away the more he speaks to you, the more he touches you.

“Leon, this is… this is so wrong…” your voice comes out so quiet you aren’t sure he could hear you. Or maybe it’s just because the blood pounding in your ears is so loud that you can barely hear yourself.

“But you like that don’t you? Yeah, I know you do.” His finger travels further up to slide across your bottom lip. Involuntarily—you tell yourself—your lips part slightly. He just laughs softly behind you, the smirk that was undoubtedly plastered on his face was audible. “Does this slutty girl want something in her mouth? There you go…” he slides his finger past your lips and onto your tongue. His thumb starts pushing slow thrusts against your tongue. Your hands go to hold onto his forearm feebly, not trying to move or stop him but just needing something to hold onto. “Yeah? You like it when I finger your pretty little mouth?” You just whine and start sucking around his thumb. “Fuck, bet you’d do so good on my cock.” You turned around to face him.

It was stupid, and you don’t know why you did it… yes you do, liar.

“What?” He grinned down at you. Now being able to see your lips around his thumb he couldn’t get enough of it. You knew you were turned on but holy shit you weren’t expecting him to look like… that. His mouth was slightly parted and his eyes were lidded. A light blush dusts his cheeks. God he looked good. You imagined you probably looked something similar, probably worse. “I asked you a question.” He pulls his thumb from your mouth and slides it down your chin and across your neck. ‘Oh, right.’

“I um… can I?” You swallowed heavily, barely able to focus on your words with his fingers rubbing at your soft skin.

“‘Can you’ what?” He just laughs, he can tell you’re struggling. Your face heats up with embarrassment realizing just how fuck-drunk you already are. And then he just gets the cockiest look on his face. “Oh, you wanna suck my cock? That what this is?” You just nod weakly, you couldn’t deny it if you tried. “Hmm? I can’t hear you, what do you want?”

“I wanna…” you swallow thickly, “I wanna suck your cock, please.” You chewed on the inside of your lip and just looked at him. He felt like he could just about cum from how needy your voice sounded when you said ‘please’.

“Fuck,” his hand slide up your neck and went to the back of your head. “I know you do. Now get on your knees.” His hand tangled in your hair right up against your scalp and he tightened his grip a little, pulling your head back ever so slightly in the process. The way he was talking to you, how he was treating you, all like you were just some object for his pleasure… fuck, it made you wet. If this situation could possibly get any worse from you guys just doing anything at all in the first place, getting turned on from your stepbrother degrading and objectifying you would definitely make it worse. You moaned softly when he pulled your hair as you started to kneel down in front of him slowly, struggling to resist the urge of responding ‘yes, sir.’ When your knees were on the ground and you finally stopped shifting around to get as comfortable as possible you finally realized the position you were in.

You were on your knees in front of your stepbrother about to suck him off…

But at this point, all thought or consideration of morality and shame had long been lost on you. Instead the lewdness of the situation only fueled the fire and part of you was just getting off on how wrong this was. You felt filthy and all it did was make you want to continue. ‘Shit, what the hell is wrong with me?’, would be what you’d typically be thinking. And you were, just less in a self-deprecating way and more in a self-humiliation way. You bite your lip at the site in front of you, Leon’s clothed hard cock in his gray sweatpants. He had noticed how fixated you were and tilted his head at you with a smirk.

“You want it?” You just stared up at him and moved your hands up to his thighs as you slid them up. “I asked you a question, answer me.” He pulled your hair a little harder this time and you moaned a little louder.

“Yes, wan’ it, Leon, please.” You were completely breathless. It had felt like your mind had turned to mush. You hadn’t even registered his question as a question when he asked, you just wanted to touch him.

“Yeah, I know.” He pushed your head forward till your cheek was pressed up against his cock. “Pretty little cockwhore just wants me inside her.” Your breath quickened when he started grinding up against your face. “Or she just wants to feel me however I please.” His voice was teasing now and he just ground down against you harder.

“However you please, just… Leon, need you.” You barely even sounded like yourself anymore. Normal you would have just pushed him away in the beginning as you made your second-hand embarrassment apparent. Normal you would have known that that was one of the easiest ways to mess with someone and would have totally used it. But here you were instead, a strong-willed smart girl who never pulled any punches now on her knees getting debased completely and absolutely loving it.

“Mmm, you’ll let me use you however I want? What if this is how I wanna do it? What if I just wanna take my cock out and rub it against your face till I cum all over you?” Even in this state you knew he was trying to trap you. He wanted to get you to disagree so he could hear you begging for whatever you really wanted. But you wouldn’t disagree, cause you don’t.

“Even then, just anything you want.” He grinned at your reply. He was tempted, he really was, but after wanting you for so long he wasn’t gonna waste this chance just to prove a point. ‘Next time.’ He pulls your head back just a little so he can see your face. Your lips are slightly parted and you just stare up at him with a grazed over expression.

“Take it out.” He says firmly and raises his eyebrows. You look down at his crotch and bring your hands up to take his dick out of his pants. You feel a sudden sting on your cheek as he slaps you across the face. “No, look at me.” He grabs your jaw and tilts your face up towards his. You make eye contact with him as you start undoing the string on his sweatpants. Part of you wants to look away just so that he’ll slap you again but you don’t. You start pulling his sweatpants and underwear down till his cock swings free. Your eyes dart down to his dick and are only able to just barely register what you’re seeing before he slaps you again just a little harder. “Did you not hear what I said to you? Look. At. Me.” You moan softly and shake your head.

“I heard you, ‘m sorry I was just curious.” You sound a little like you’re about to cry but you’re far from sad about all this.

“You’re curious?” He mocks your voice and pouts his lip before scoffing and leaning down ever so slightly. His thumb caressing your neck. “Don’t worry, once I fuck this little throat you’ll have every answer you could possibly ask for.” You shudder a little before just nodding your head and opening your mouth. You loll your tongue out and he grins. “Yeah, stay like that.” He slaps his heavy tip on your tongue and you can taste the bitterness of his pre-cum. “Open wider.” You obey him and open your mouth further. He leans forward and spits in your mouth. Your eyes flutter and you press your thighs together, which doesn’t go unnoticed. “You like that?” He laughs and rubs one of his fingers over your tongue. “You like it when I spit in your mouth? Fucking disgusting.” He grips his cock and guides it onto your tongue before pushing into your mouth. He groans and holds your head back against the side of his bed before he starts thrusting into your mouth. “Mmm, fuck. Such a good girl with a slutty little mouth. What would your friends say if they knew you’re getting face fucked by your stepbrother, and loving it so much you’re practically dripping onto the floor? What would your mom say?” You really didn’t wanna think about his second question.

“Mmm.” You just hum around his cock in response and he smirked. It’s not like you could actually respond. You kept your eyes on him, loving the way his jaw tightened when he hit the back of your throat. Or the way the muscles in his arms would twitch and flex under his tight shirt. He was right, you did love this and you could feel the discomfort of your sticky panties between your thighs, damp and uncomfortable. His hand went to the top of your head to grip your hair between his fingers and he started pushing in faster.

“Mmh, oh fuck… love sucking on your big brothers cock, yeah? Such a fucking cockwhore it doesn’t matter who it’s from.” He was thrusting at a fervent pace and it was evident he was just chasing his own high. Using your mouth as his personal fleshlight to fuck and fill. It was hot being treated like this, especially by Leon. He tightened his hold on your hair and pushed in a little too far which made you choke. It made slick pour into the gusset of your panties. Fuck, he was right. You’re a total slut. Your hands went up to hold onto his thighs for support as your eyes closed. Spit drooled down your chin and onto your chest, tears poured down your cheeks which Leon took pleasure in wiping away. “Maybe next time you’ll let me fuck that pretty pussy. Bet she’s just crying for me, you are.” ‘Next time?’ The thought made your skin burn with arousal. “Think you’re gonna let me fill up all your holes. Fuck. Yeah, I wanna see that. My obedient little stepsister leaking cum onto my bed, absolutely spent. Such a fucking whore you’d probably ask me to do it again. Fuck your little pussy till it’s sloppy and bred.”

He wasn’t even looking at you. His head tilted back and his hips stuttered. You could tell he was getting close.

“I’m gonna cum down this slutty throat and you’re gonna swallow it all and thank me.” His face and neck were a little red and he had this sheen of sweat that the light from his lamp bounced off of. He looked like some kind of angel and if he wasn’t aggressively fucking your face you might’ve actually believed he was. “Fuck, oh take it.” He moaned and pushed his cock to the back of your throat. You could feel his hot cum paint stripes into your mouth. He rutted his tip right against the back of your throat while he moaned and mumbled. “Good girl, good girl. Take it, baby.” He pulled back out of your mouth and looked down at you while he stroked himself a few times to make sure he was done. A little bit of cum spilled from his tip and onto your thigh. You could finally swallow now that he was out of your mouth and god it felt good. You opened your mouth to show him that you really did it.

“Thank you.” You smiled up at him softly and he shuddered at your words. He looked away from you and cursed as his face got red. He was just talking earlier; he didn't think you’d actually do it.

“Quit it, you’re gonna make me hard again.” He seemed a little embarrassed. He moved your hair out of your face and went to the bathroom across the hall. You heard water running for a bit and then he came back and kneeled in front of you. He silently used a warm rag to wipe away the dried tears from your face and the little bit of cum that spilled onto your chin. “There you go.”

“Thank you.” He wiped away the bit that was on your thigh and you guys just stared at each other for a second. It wasn’t really awkward but more like each of you had something to say that you just wouldn’t.

He leaned forward and kissed you. It was soft and sweet and you had plenty of room to move away if you didn’t want it. There was such a contrast from what you were doing now and what you had been doing, hell, how he was acting with you now and how he had always acted with you; it felt like it was short circuiting your brain, but in a good way. He pulled back and set the rag on his bedside table before picking you up and setting you on his bed. He crawled in next to you and put his arms around you. It felt a little weird but in a nice comforting way. It was something you really needed. You almost forgot that you had been sucking him off—if you could even call it that—like two minutes ago. You really weren’t tired but you laid there with him for who knows how long.

Maybe you really didn’t hate having a stepbrother.

#anasanthology #anyas world #anya’s world #leon kennedy #fanfic #leon s kennedy #leon kennedy fanfic #stepbro!leon #stepbro!leon Kennedy x reader #leon kennedy smut #leon kennedy x reader #stepcest #leon kennedy x fem reader

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am-i-the-asshole-official · 5 months

Note

AITA for being upset at my mom?

🎵🎵 (to find it)

I know it's not a real big deal, but it's starting to get upsetting. English is not my first language and im on mobile sl sorry about that.

Okay, so my(20f) mother (F mid40s) suffer from long covid. Her symptoms consist of chronic fatigue, short breath, join pain and brain fog. (I still live home because im a college student, and finding an appartment in this market is hell)

We've been really supportive of her :

I drive most of the time, and my sister(16f) has her apprentice driver license, so she drives for mom when im at school; when we go to the mall and she need to take a break to breath, i always offer to go get her a wheelchair, or going to get the car, she sleeps a lot in the day so we don't make noise, i bought her loops earplug for sleeping, etc.

We're are used to it and my dad (mid40s too) work 12 hours a day to compensate for the money we're losing with mom on sickleave (where we live we have job insurance and etc): he starts at 5:30am to 6pm, and i usually only see him in the evening, so the only time we really are together as a family is during the evening meal.

There is where i could be the a-hole:

Since mom got long covid, it takes more time for her to respons us, and her memory isnt as good as it was (shes well known in her workplace, she a well respected manager who takes great care of her employees). It's just, almost every night, when me or my sister or even my dad are telling a something that happened in our day, she always cut us to say something, like :don't forget to put this in that, or just to say something she did that day over our own story, or asking me to bring her water in the middle of my sister's sentences (which she could have waited for after she was done).

So we, someone different each time, always tell her "X was speaking, you just cut them, and you do this often, please let them finish" and, well, when it happens everytime i am (or my sister) is trying to say something, it get upsetting. And she always uses the same reasons: "we're a family and we're cohabiting, sometime we talk over you but still listen to you" (no she doesn’t, i have to tell her a million times the same fucking thing and she always forget) or "you know my mind is a little slow right now, i'll forget if i don't say it" or she gets upset because we're annoyed by it.

But god forbid if you cut her! She'll raise her tone, and still doesn't get why we're upset.

Like, i get it, she got long covid and it's a bitch to deal with the way your cognitive capabilities slow down with the fatigue, but we've been extremely helpful (and im still gonna be, because she's my mother) and her allowing herself to lack respect towards us doesn't excuse her because she's ill. At least this is how i see it?

At this point i dont really know if i can feel upset? Like, she's my mom, and she's ill (and it's really depressing seeing her this put down by the symptoms i don't wish it to anyone) but im just so tired to have to restart the same sentence four or five time because she keep interrupting me

So, aita?

What are these acronyms?

#aita #am i the asshole

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karmic-vibes · 1 year

Text

If I Can Dream

24 - While I Can Think, Talk, Stand, Walk

art credit: @lazylittledragon on tumblr / lazyjunebug on twitter

cw: general teenage angst, mentions of not eating (not related to any EDs !!), blood

Year: 2004

“Okay, just a few more steps,” Eddie said.

His hands were over Bobby’s eyes as he guided her out of the house, down the driveway. The teenager was giggling to herself, stumbling over her own feet as her father tried leading the way. Eddie peered around the girl, tongue poking out of the corner of his mouth, trying his best to focus.

“Nearly.” They took a few more steps as Eddie sighed in relief. “Okay, ready?”

“Yes!”

“Alright… one, two, three!” He pulled his hands away and ran to meet Steve.

“Oh my god…”

“Tada!”

The two were standing next to a brand new, navy blue BMW Beamer, arms raised with cheer. There was a bright red bow on the hood of the car—the perfect finishing touch to the teenager’s birthday gift.

“I… oh my god… thank you guys!”

She ran into their arms, crying tears of joy. Bobby had recently gotten her license and was constantly asking to borrow Eddie’s decked out Dodge Charger, over Steve’s practical Mercedes sedan. So, the couple compromised and got her a Beamer—best of both worlds.

“Now, there’s a couple rules,” Steve started. “First–”

“When can I take her for a spin?” Bobby cut him off.

“After we tell you the rules and responsibilities, okay?”

“Fine… lay them on me.”

“Okay,” Steve sighed, hands resting on his hips. “First, having a car is a big responsibility. You need to make sure all its preventative maintenance is done, like oil changes, tire rotations–”

“Yeah, okay, what else?” Bobby was practically buzzing from excitement.

“There’s going to be a curfew. You can leave as early as you need for work or school, but I expect to see you home, in the driveway, walking through that front door no later than ten, got it?”

“But dad,” she whined. “All my friends get to stay out until eleven, sometimes even later!”

“And you’ll survive coming home an hour earlier.”

“Fine,” she pouted. “What else?”

“You’re responsible for putting gas in it, got it? Pops and I will handle insurance and payments and everything, but gas is up to you. We want you saving your hard earned money, but we still want you to be responsible for something this big. Understood?”

“Yes, dad. Keys, please?”

“Here,” he smiled, handing them over.

“Ah! Thank you, thank you, thank you!” She hugged them, eagerly jumping up and down.

“Okay, okay,” Eddie giggled, “just be safe, alright?”

“I will, papa. I love you guys so much!”

Bobby released herself from the hug and ran to the driver’s seat. Steve took the bow off the car, tucking it under his arm, as he waved his daughter off.

“She didn’t grab her license, did she?” Steve asked.

“Nope.”

“Her phone is probably inside too, huh?”

“Yup.”

“Whole purse?”

“Mhmm.”

“How long until you think she figures it out?”

“I give her ten minutes.”

A few days passed and Bobby had barely been home—she was taking her car out at any chance she had. The boys would be lying if they said they didn’t enjoy having a little helper go to the store, or put gas in their cars, or even have to drive her around anymore. However, it broke their heart to see their little girl so grown up.

Ever since Bobby got her car, the boys noticed she was becoming more secretive. Whenever she went out, she never explicitly said what she was doing or who she was going out with. Steve trusted that she knew was she was doing, but Eddie was constantly panicked. He was her age once—terribly sneaky and always getting into trouble (at least before dating Steve).

One day, Bobby came home right before dinner was on the table. She rushed through the corridor, dumping her bag in the hall, and trying to run up the stairs. However, her efforts were stopped by Eddie catching the hood of her sweatshirt.

“Where do you think you’re going, missy?” he asked.

“Upstairs,” she mumbled.

“Dinners gonna be ready in a few minutes.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“Bobby Judas, why are you facing away from me?”

“It’s nothing, pops! Jesus Christ, leave me alone!”

“What’s going on?” Steve asked. “Bobbs, come on, dinners nearly ready.”

“I’m not hungry!” She yelled, finally facing her parents.

Their eyes widened when they finally saw their little girl—septum pierced along with bilateral nostrils. Eddie stammered as he tried to find the right words, but Steve took them right out of his mouth.

“What did you do?” Steve uttered.

“Went to the piercer…”

“How… how did you get… who signed off on parental consent?”

“I… um…”

“Um?” Eddie fumed.

“I have a fake…”

“Jesus Christ,” he sighed. “You could’ve just asked us! Honey, you know us, we would’ve said yes. B-But going behind our backs? Bug, it’s a slap in the face.”

“I’m sorry… I didn’t think you guys would approve…”

“How did you expect to hid three piercings?”

“I didn’t think that far ahead.”

“Do you know how to properly take care of everything?” Steve sighed.

“Sorta…”

“Christ, okay, did the piercer tell you? Give you instructions or anything?”

“No, but Judah–”

“Ugh,” Eddie scoffed.

“What, papa? What do you have against my boyfriend?”

“Where do I start,” he seethed.

“Eddie,” Steve warned.

“He has made you rebellious and has you going behind our backs! We didn’t raise you to be like this!”

“Well, turns out, you did!”

And just like that, Steve was teleported nearly twenty years into the past. Back to one of the many arguments he had with his parents—specifically, when he stood up on Eddie’s behalf. He was sick and tired of his parents misgendering Eddie—he figured it was time to finally stand up for himself and his [now] husband. Steve had dissociated, being stuck in a memory.

“I didn’t raise a fag,” John spat.

“Well, turns out, you did,” Steve grit his teeth. “I love him. He’s not going anywhere. Get used to it.”

It wasn’t until Bobby’s yelling pulled him back into reality.

“I love him! He’s fun and older and mature. He’s everything a girl could want,” she fawned.

“How much older,” Steve asked.

“What?”

“Bobby, how old is he?”

“Only nineteen.”

“Bobby!” the two yelled.

“I knew you’d react this way! Ugh, why can’t I just be happy!”

“While you live under our roof, you live by our rules. Are we clear?” Eddie scolded.

“You guys ruin all my fun. I hate you!” She cried, running up to her room.

Tears streamed down Eddie’s face as he hit the corridor wall just enough to make the paint chip. He wiped his eyes on his sweatshirt sleeve and stormed back into the kitchen with Steve hot on his trail.

“We can’t yell at her like that,” Steve said. “It’ll only make everything worse.”

“No, I know,” Eddie sniffed. “I just… we didn’t raise her to shy away or hide from us. I-I thought we were doing a good job at forming that close bond where she could tell or ask us anything.”

“I guess not,” Steve sighed. “But think back to when you were her age… were you any better?”

“That’s what I’m afraid of, Stevie… I don’t want her to be like me.”

“Smart, pretty, and successful?” he teased.

“Shut up,” Eddie mumbled. “I’m being serious. When I was sixteen, Christ, I was getting sketchy tattoos in peoples basements. I-I was out in the woods growing my own pot and selling it to people.”

“You were what?”

“Please, I sold much worse.”

“You what?”

“What?” Eddie shrugged.

“Eds, we’ve been married for how many fucking years and you’re just now telling me you used to be a drug dealer?”

“How did you think I made my money?” He raised a brow.

“Hell, I don’t know, maybe working like a normal person‽”

“Please, when have you ever known me to be normal?”

“Touché…”

“So what’re we gonna do about Bee?” Eddie sighed.

“Eds, I don’t think there’s anything we can do. We just have to let her make her own choices and make sure she doesn’t get herself killed.”

“I miss when she was little,” Eddie pouted. “God, we were best friends. She was a mini-me—a little sidekick!”

“To be fair, Eds, she’s still a mini-you. She’s just reached that rebellious stage,” Steve shrugged. “Let her ride it out. I’m sure it’ll all work out—it did with you, didn’t it?”

“Yeah, but only because I started dating the hot jock, not some dude who already graduated.”

“Ed, you were supposed to already be graduated when we started dating. You’re reading too deep into this.”

“Yes, but I was nineteen and you were eighteen. A little different than sixteen and nineteen.”

“I’m not saying I’m happy about it, but us trying to stop it is going to do more harm than good.”

“I guess you’re right… do you wanna try getting her down here for dinner? Or at least bring a plate up to her?”

“I think it’d be better if you did it, Eds.”

“Why me?”

“The tensions been a lot higher between you two than me and her.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. I’ll go try and bring her down.”

Eddie ascended the stairs and made his way to his daughter’s room. He gently knocked a few times before testing to see if the knob would turn. When it did, he let himself in. Bobby was sitting on her bed, legs clung to her chest, journal balanced atop her knees—headphone cords dangling from her ears as music blared loud enough even for Eddie to hear.

“Bobbs?” Eddie started. She glanced up, rolled her eyes, and went back to journaling. “Bobby, honey, I’m sorry.” Eddie closed the door behind him and sat on the edge of her bed. “Bee, please…”

“What do you want?” she huffed, ripping her headphones out.

“I wanted to apologize.”

“I don’t wanna hear it. Judah and I are happy.”

“No, I know, but forgive me for worrying. If you ever become a parent you’ll understand.”

“What’s the big deal? Huh? You’re older than dad!”

“Yes, honey, I know, but we were nineteen and eighteen when we started dating. We were both legal. I just worry that he’s gonna take advantage of you.”

“He’s not that stupid, and neither am I. He knows better—mainly because I think he knows you and dad would kill him,” she giggled.

“He better know,” Eddie weakly smiled. “We love you, bug, and we just want you to be happy and safe.”

“I’m a big girl, pops, you don’t need to baby me.”

“Bobby, you’ll always be my baby. Even when dad and I are old and gray, you’ll still be our baby.”

“What do you mean when?”

“Bobby Judas!” Eddie teased. “Ugh, fresh. You literally are a mini-me, Christ.”

“Oh my god, it’s almost like I came outta you.”

“You came out of me‽” Eddie jokingly gasped. “I thought I was a man!”

“Oh, shit, pops, I love you.” Bobby laughed to herself, nudging him with her foot.

“I love you too, bug. So, what’d ya say? Come downstairs for dinner?”

“I’m honestly not hungry, papa.”

“Then at least join us? Please?”

“I’ll be down in a few, okay?”

“Okay… love you.”

“I love you too.”

A few days passed, and while amends had been made, Bobby was still sneaking around, getting herself into trouble. One random evening, Steve and Eddie heard a bump in the night, jostling them awake.

“What was that?” Eddie groaned.

“Was that Bobby?”

“Probably.”

“Can you go check on her?”

“Whose night did we leave off on?”

“Eddie, that was like ten years ago. How the fuck am I supposed to remember?”

“Because you’re supposed to be the smart one here, Steven.”

“Go check on our spawn, for fuck’s sake.”

“Christ, fine.”

Eddie swung his legs out of bed and trudged down the hall. He quietly opened Bobby’s bedroom door and glanced in, not seeing his teenager anywhere, not even her bed (which did not look slept in).

“Piece of shit, stupid fucker.”

Eddie turned his head, hearing sobbing coming from the upstairs bathroom. He knocked on the door, not even waiting for an answer.

“Bee, is everything– Bobby!”

Tears pricked at Eddie’s eyes as he saw his daughter crying, blood pooling in her hands as it poured from her nose. He rushed in, panicking to help her in some way—any way.

“Bobby, wh-what happened? Did that piece of shit hit you?”

“No,” she cried. “We-We-We– god!” She sobbed hysterically.

“Just breathe, it’s okay, you’re okay,” Eddie cooed. He dampened a wash cloth as he cleaned her face.

“We broke up,” she sniffed.

“Why’re you bleeding?”

“Did you not hear me?”

“No, I did, pumpkin, and I’m sorry to hear that, but why are you bleeding?”

“I was taking my piercings out,” she frowned. “He was the one that liked them… I don’t want ‘em anymore.”

“Sweetheart…” Eddie sighed.

“What’s going on? I heard crying!” Steve panted, bursting through the threshold.

“Smooth, Harrington.”

“Shut it. Bobby, what’s wrong? You’re bleeding…”

“Thanks, Captain Obvious.”

“Okay, watch the fucking attitude, Eds. Bobbs, what happened? Are you hurt?”

“Papa, don’t make me repeat it,” she cried.

“I’ll explain later, Steve, just go back to bed. I’ve got it handled.”

“You sure?”

“Positive. Look at me, bug…”

Eddie gingerly lifted her chin as he dabbed away at the blood staining her sore nose. She winced in pain at every passing swipe, Eddie tutting his tongue in sorrow. He couldn’t stand seeing his daughter sad—never mind in pain.

“Bee?” Eddie whispered.

“Hmm?”

“Why didn’t you ask us for help? O-Or wait until the morning when we could take you to a piercer to get this stuff removed?”

“I dunno, I just panicked,” she shrugged. “You wouldn’t know—you’ve never been heart broken.”

“Says who?” Eddie asked.

“Please,” Bobby scoffed. “You and dad have been together for a million years.”

“Doesn’t mean I didn’t date before that.”

“Wait, you… you were in love before dad?”

“Mhmm, sure was.”

“What was his name?”

“It was actually a girl.”

“Oh… I never knew you ever dated any girls.”

“Girl… just the one.”

“Does dad know?”

“Mhmm. He was actually friends with her back in high school, long before we started dating.”

“Was she pretty?”

“Oh, gorgeous,” Eddie beamed.

“Why’d you break up?”

“Well, sweetheart, I realized I wasn’t into women in that way. I was confused when I was younger—trying different things, seeing what felt right. My junior year of high school, I rekindled with this beautiful girl who I was friends with back in middle school. I knew I wasn’t straight, but I didn’t know in what way. At the time, I thought I was a lesbian… I was getting so much gender envy from all the guys, I just thought I hated men. Turns out, I wanted to be them,” Eddie chuckled. “But, before she joined the cheer squad and became popular, we briefly dated, and yeah… the rest is history.”

“And you loved her?”

“I adored her, honey. I loved her as a person, and I honestly kick myself for not keeping in touch after the breakup.”

“Was it mutual?”

“Yeah,” he shrugged. “We realized we were different and not what we wanted. We were both heartbroken, sure, but we still loved each other.”

“That’s so… bittersweet…”

“Sure was,” Eddie whispered.

Eddie eased out the remainder of her fresh piercings, throwing them haphazardly in the trash. He finished cleaning up Bobby’s face and hands before running to get her a clean pair of pajamas. After she changed, she headed back to the bathroom to take off the rest of her makeup. Eddie took it upon himself to undo her ponytail and brush out her fried hair.

“Thanks, papa,” she sighed.

“Anytime, bug.”

“Papa?”

“Hmm?”

“Actually, never mind, it’s stupid.”

“No, what’s up?”

“How did you know you loved dad?”

“I just knew,” he beamed. “I can’t really explain it. I knew I loved him pretty early on, but I never said it until about six months in.”

“What made you finally say it?”

“Well…” Eddie’s cheeks burned red, thinking back to the night him and his husband confessed their love.

“Oh, fuck, Steve. Shit, I love you so fucking much,” Eddie babbled.

“I love you too, baby,” Steve huffed, trying to hold out for Eddie. “You feel so fucking good, god. So tight, so wet—all for me.”

“All for you,” Eddie whined. “God, please, Steve!”

“Pops?”

“Hmm?” Eddie’s eyes widened, pulling himself back into reality.

“What made you say it?”

“Just… how sweet and understanding he was when I came out.”

“What made you come out to him?”

“He was upset our relationship wasn’t progressing the way he had hoped. He started asking if there was a problem with him and he got all worked up. I couldn’t hide from him anymore so I showed him my bandages–”

“From top surgery?”

“No, no, that wasn’t until a year or so later. I mean, I used to use ace bandages to bind my chest down. But he took them off, cared for me, and has loved me unconditionally ever since.”

“If that never happened, would you have ever come out to him?”

“It’s hard to say, honestly. I was afraid of losing him.”

“But why would you want to be with someone who wouldn’t love you for you?”

“You never knew him in high school,” Eddie chuckled. “God, did you know, dad initially wanted upwards of six kids. Six, Bobby!”

“Yeah, you’ve mentioned it once or twice,” she giggled.

“I know, but I still can’t get over it! Regardless… I loved him so much that, if I never came out, lord, I would’ve popped all six out for him. I would’ve been miserable, but if he was happy, that’s all I cared about.”

“That seems toxic…”

“It would be if he didn’t love me back or didn’t compromise. But alas, he did, and he just wants to see me happy too. Seeing me happy was just having you,” he smiled. “That’s called loving someone unconditionally… all their beauty and all their flaws.”

He continued brushing through her hair, grabbing the numerous products Steve bought for her, and properly pampered her hair. Bobby closed her eyes and sighed contently. She knew this is what love was supposed to be—someone to always be there for you, care for you, and accept you no matter what; all your beauty, and all your flaws.

“Papa?”

“Yes, bug?”

“You said you would’ve been miserable with multiple kids.”

“Mhmm.”

“Did you ever think you were gonna be miserable with me?”

“Oh, god, yes. Bobby, I was petrified when I found out I was pregnant. I was terrified that I wouldn’t love you, or that you wouldn’t love me. Thankfully, dad knocked some sense into me.”

“How so?”

“He said something along the lines of people who worry about not loving someone often already love them more than they know.”

“And?”

“Wouldn’t ya know it—I love you more than life itself,” Eddie beamed. “You’re a good kid, Bee. Dad and I are proud of you… we always will be…”

“Thanks, papa,” she whispered. “Sorry I’ve been a pain in the ass…”

“Eh, it’s alright. You’re a teenager—we’ve all had our moments. Okay…” Eddie whispered, tongue poked out in concentration as he tied Bobby’s hair into a braid. “And done! Get to bed, love bug. You have school in the morning.”

“Alright, pops. I love you.”

“I love you too—sleep well.”

Despite the boys’ best efforts, Bobby was still sneaking around. Steve and Eddie considered different forms of discipline, but they realized that would only make everything worse. Instead, they decided to try the opposite—play into it—let her know that they knew her every move.

“Bobbs! Dinner!” Steve called.

“Not hungry!”

“Bobby Judas, please come down and try to eat something!”

“I said I’m not hungry!”

“Bobby!” Eddie warned. “Get down here!”

“What’re you doing?” Steve whispered.

“Getting the spawn to eat.”

The boys heard the thumping of their child trudging down the stairs. She stood on the landing, arms crossed, hip jutted out against the banister. She raised a brow as she tapped her foot impatiently.

“What?” she snapped.

“Okay, cut the attitude, missy. Come sit down with us,” Eddie said.

“I told you, I’m not hungry.”

“That’s fine, just sit with us.”

“But I have to work on my campaign.”

“I’m sorry, your what?” Steve asked.

“You heard me.”

“While I’m so proud of you, join your father and I for dinner. If you eat, I’ll help you out and we’ll make a one-shot that is so hard and so sadistic, not even I’ll be able to beat it.”

“Shit, fine.”

She hopped down the few remaining stairs and pulled a seat up at the dining table. She grabbed a plate and a glass of water and took her usual spot between her fathers. She started shoveling the meal down her throat, trying to clear the table as quick as she could.

“So, how was school?” Steve asked, trying to start up a conversation.

“Fine,” Bobby mumbled.

“How’s your nose?” Eddie added.

“Fine.”

“Bee–”

“It’s fine. Everything’s fine.” She shoved the last remaining bits of food in her mouth before standing up. “Thanks for dinner. Bye.”

“Bobby–”

“Dad–”

“Sit, for fucks sake. We miss you, pumpkin. Talk to us.”

“Christ, fine.”

She slumped back down, crossing her arms in protest.

“So how’s school?” Steve asked again.

“It’s fine, seriously.”

“Meds working out okay?”

“Yeah, I guess so.”

“You’re focusing okay?”

“Mhmm.”

“None of your friends are asking for your Adderall, right?”

“Some do.”

“You don’t… you don’t give it to them though, right?” Steve stuttered. “I love your father, but I don’t want you being like him.”

“Hey– eh, you’re right,” Eddie shrugged.

“No, I don’t give it to them.”

“You promise?”

“I swear, dad. I literally need it to function in school. I’m not about to just give it away or sell it. Plus, if I need money for something, I’ll just ask papa.”

“Okay… I believe you…” Steve sighed.

“So what’re you working on in your campaign?” Eddie asked with a mouth full of food.

“Christ, I thought you’d never ask!”

Bobby got lost in her story telling, speaking to her fathers more than she had in the past month. By the time she was done explaining her campaign, Steve was already cleaning up the mess from dinner. Eddie placed a kiss on Bobby’s head and joined his husband, helping him tidy up. Bobby peered in, smirking to herself as she quietly grabbed her car keys.

“I’m going to bed,” she called.

“Night, bug,” Eddie said. “We love you.”

“Love you too.”

She ran upstairs, locking her bedroom door behind her. She grabbed an array of pillows and clothes and stuffed them under her blanket to match the shape of her sleeping body. The young girl popped open her window and scaled down the front of her house like she had done many times before.

Bobby briefly fumbled with her keys, unlocking her car with the main key so her parents wouldn’t hear the alarm go off. She buckled herself in and started the engine, eager to drive off into the nothingness of Hawkins. As she tuned her radio to the desired station, she heard a voice echo from the backseat.

“Where are we going?”

“Ah!” She screamed.

“Do you think I’m stupid, Bobby?” Eddie asked.

“Sorry…” She whispered.

“Be home by twelve or I’m sending dad to come and get you.”

“But he’ll embarrass me!”

“Yeah, exactly.” Eddie got out of the car, leaning in through the window. “Just be safe, kiddo, okay?”

“Okay…”

“Please don’t hurt yourself or get into any trouble.”

“I know.”

“Dad and I love you and we hate that you’re becoming distant from us… I know we’re lame and everything but… but we miss you, Bee…”

“I’m sorry, papa. I love you guys too. It’s just, I’m not a little girl anymore. I wanna go out and have fun and do my own thing.”

“I understand,” he sighed. “All we ask is have dinner with us, alright?”

“Fine.”

“And don’t end up like me.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Bobbs, I was a sneaky, rebellious drug dealer who was held back three times. Go out and party and do whatever kids your age do. But for the love of god… don’t end up like me. Talk to us. Ask us for help. We’ll always be here for you… we want to be there for you…”

“I know… I’m sorry, papa…”

“It’s okay.” He kissed her cheek and hugged her as tight as he could through the window. “Just be safe. You call us if you need us. No questions asked.”

“Okay, pops,” she giggled.

“Bye, pumpkin.”

“Bye, papa. I’ll see you when I get home.”

“No later than midnight!”

“I know, I know.”

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grisailledreams · 10 months

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Heyyy, guys. So, TLDR; last night, someone smashed my car window. It's $400 and we incredibly can't afford that. We can't even really pay our bills.

Long version: I lost my job last year when it closed down and ended up pursuing a new employment avenue that's been unpaid (an esthetics apprenticeship) and incredibly difficult to navigate when it comes to earning my actual license (we love the state board). Since then, I've been able to pick up a one-day-a-week job for a local small business, but it pays exactly one of my bills and buys cat food. My husband's job basically covers rent and dog food. We're on EBT. I have two large credit bills that have been used for emergencies or other lean times in the past (one regular, one for veterinary bills), but these are now several payments behind. There's no way we're going to be able to get our car window fixed for a long time - and we need this car to get to work.

I would be incredibly grateful for any help towards fixing our window and helping us with bills! The first $400 will be used to fix the car window. Anything extra will go to pet care (we have two cats, one terminally ill, and a dog), credit bills, renter's insurance, rent, car fuel, and utilities. I appreciate you taking the time to read this! Even if you can't donate, I'd also appreciate sharing this with others. Thank you so much!

#gofundme #signal boost #i'm trying really hard to not apologize for bothering anyone or for asking for help pls know how much growth that is for me

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tooattached2fictionalcharacters · 1 year

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Hey y’all, your local desperate enby here, really don’t want to be asking this but I’m down to the wire with my car insurance (it will be canceled the 19th). My insurance is attached to my license, which I need for my income. I cannot not pay this. I already got approved for a second credit card with a tiny line (were talking 200 after I paid the fee), but this is a rinkydink little credit card company that can’t be bothered to give me digital access for the card while I wait for the physical card (Stone Age much???). This is just my IMMEDIATE need, I don’t have my minimum met for Lyft yet this week, so nothing I make is going towards this yet, and I’m doubtful I’ll manage to pull $162 worth of dog walks while actively trying to pull drives. If you use stripe, I will have to wait for it to process. PP will be an immediate payment. Both take a percentage. I can dm you my pp/v.enmo if you don’t want a percentage being taken by ko-fi.

Provided I can get this paid, I’m still going to need to pay 220 to storage next week, and get on top of my truck being fixed. I’m working crazy hours and have been walking 6-9 miles a day dog walking when I’m not driving. If I can’t get my truck fixed, I need at least enough to pay for a week’s rate in a motel so I can start that in march if it comes down to it.

If you want a sketch in exchange for a donation, I’m happy to do one. Examples of my most recent work above. If you need help with dog training since I’ve done that professionally for the last decade, I can do that via video chat. I’m not trying to ask for help for nothing but this is crucial I remain able to drive, and keep my dogs housed one way or another while I get us sorted to move to Missouri. Thank you for boosting if you can’t help, I know money is tight for everyone right now.

#mutual aid #queer aid #signal boost #tagg fundraiser #fundraiser

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indecentpause · 10 months

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Find the Word

tagged by @asher-orion-writes to find the words find, pull, press, and hear! thank!

from The Most Beautiful Puzzle!

find:

Okay, okay, you have to be calm. Stranger danger. What do you do if you get kidnapped? Try to leave clues. You have to leave something for Josselin to find. You squint as your vision adjusts to the dark. Aside from your heavy, sharp breaths, it’s quiet. No traffic. No honking. No witnesses. Oh god–

pull:

“I see them, too,” Josselin says. “Silver Honda Accord, 2016. Illinois license plate.” “Can you get the number? Maybe the Inspector can find someone to run it.” Josselin pulls out his phone and types in the license plate number into his notes app. “I really wish I could run it now,” he mumbles to himself.

press/hear:

“I can help you with your car insurance,” Josselin offers. You look up. “No! No, I can’t ask you to do that. That’s not your job.” “It’s not your job to ferry me around, either,” he says, “but we see how that’s going. And I’ll help you with gas.” You frown a little. You want to accept. You want to let him help you. It’s okay to accept help when you need it. You’ve helped people out many times. But all you can hear is Drake in your head, saying, You’ll never make it without me. Josselin asks, softly, “Meara?” You press your thumb in the furrow between your eyebrows for a moment. “If it makes you feel any better, the situation has changed a lot since you moved in. We’re not really roommates anymore. We’re partners now.” You meet his eyes for just a moment, until you get uncomfortable. You like the way that sounds, even if he doesn’t mean it the way you want him to.

tagging @drippingmoon @andromedaexists @oh-no-another-idea @magic-is-something-we-create @winterandwords @idreamonpaper and YOU to find age, dry, love, and twist!

#writeblr #my writing #writeblr tag games #find the word #excerpt #wip #the most beautiful puzzle #sheraton academy #sheraton academy au #meara ryanne #josselin clearwater

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metaldragoon · 1 year

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410/2023 KM done for the year Lots of events have happened over the past two days! Mostly bad, but, oh well. You may notice I have done but a baby’s run, which is what I’ve done both days since last I run, as I managed to somehow gain 15 pounds in the two days I was visiting my mother so it’s just, not feeling great to run. I already lost 3 pounds since yesterday so I’m certain I’ll shed it off quickly especially since I’m going to be conscious of it for a bit. Anyways! I almost hit a wolf going 120km/h, he ran in front of some car going the other direction, and then picked up speed to avoid that by running directly in front of me. Definitely did like a 40 foot skid and was turned like 20 degrees sideways, but, at least for those few seconds the wolf managed to live. Who knows if the next care didn’t just drill it. I went for my fat run yesterday and it’s a shame since the weather has been so beautiful the past two days, I wanna go fast! Anyways, today I woke up and my mom informed me her brother died, which is very sad. I didn’t see her other message until lunch time since I mute my emails, but she emailed me last night about it saying “doctors say he’ll make it through the night” and then to already know the result was a bit of an oof. I am not particularly heartbroken, I was not very close with him, I met him twice. Once I went to his place, he lived in Niagara Falls so I was there for three weeks between Gr.7 - Gr. 8 summer break, but I didn’t really talk with him. He had 2 daughters I mostly hung out with there and he was just old man spending time with my mother, but truthfully it was at worst the 2nd best holidays of my life. The other time, his daughter happened to be moving west and driving through Winnipeg, which is where I was living at the time, so he picked me up along the way so that I could also move west. He then told my mother I was ungrateful so I assume he didn’t like me. But! that said my mother has not had parents for over 45 years so it’s just been her and her two brothers for most her life, and so for that I am sad that she is suffering and without someone so important to her. After work today, driving home, two lanes, light turns red, and the guy stopped beside me got rear-ended! That is... accident #4 I have witnessed in real life I believe. Some old white lady in a minivan rammed in to him, I could see her slamming the wheel after in frustration and then, y’know, cars were just sitting there, light changes green, and she speeds off. A hit and run, folks! Well, of my three other accidents I have observed one of them happened to me, in not-a-particularly-similar situation, but a hit and run none-the-less! And I was such an idiot and deleted the license plate I wrote down so I never was able to get my revenge... but not today! I took chase after our criminal! I made sure to keep my distance so she wouldn’t panic, we were in the city and I am but a normal grey sedan... the most unassuming predator. I followed her for like 3 minutes until I got close enough to read her license plate, pulled over to write down the information in my NOTES APP, and then returned to the scene of the crime. Our blue subaru would be so happy to know I tracked that witch down and his insurance would not have to take the hit! And then he wasn’t even there anymore! Good grief. So I headed to the police station, ready to file a witness report, I only know where one station is from my previous hit-and-run experience, and I don’t have data on my phone, so I’m not sure it was the closest but it was like 10 minutes out of my way. Get out my car, and some fella tells me police station’s shut down today on account of two officers were murdered today. How inconvenient for me personally. So, now it’s the weekend and we have to wonder if I even care enough to return by Monday when the station will re-open. RIP to Uncle Cameron!

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socially-awkward-skeleton · 2 years

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7 through 10 for all your girls 😈😈😈

7. Muffins or cupcakes? Write at least one page of their rant about muffins vs cupcakes. (these won't be a page long, but a fun glimpse into their different voices)

Ava - As someone with a sweet tooth I will never say no to a good cupcake. Do I think that makes them better? Not necessarily. Have you ever had a really good chocolate muffin? They can be incredible! Sorry, rambling. Anyway, I will present my thesis on why they are both important to my daily diet and no Max, it is not because I can just buy them in bulk and then pass them off as my own baking later...

Kit - Neither really provide much nutritional worth, before the nukes dropped and I ended up in this bunker, I used to get a blueberry muffin after my runs when I'd stop to grab a coffee. I would kill for a muffin right now, it's been years since I had one...

Nora - Okay, but clearly cupcakes. Those little gourmet ones you can buy, holy shit! My thighs won't be thanking me in the morning but good God, sometimes you've just gotta indulge! Besides that's what photoshop is for, hello airbrush my best friend...

Siobhan - There's this little bakery in the village outside the cathedral, they have the most incredible little cakes. They're massive! Can't get enough of 'em. Sam and I went there one weekend, it was dismal outside, said we had to ride the bike. I was trudging into the place, covered in mud and rain, I was fucking manky. Anyway, long story short, we got there when they were about to close. Sam wouldn't shut up and managed to get us a deal since the baked goods would be wasted. We ate soggy rolls out in the rain, never smelled anything quite so good though. Right, right, muffins or cupcakes...anyways, personally I'm still a fan of the classic soda bread me Nan used to bake...

8. Do they prefer arm day or leg day?

Ava - Leg day, she is a runner through and through.

Kit - Arm day. Her biceps are killer.

Nora - she prefers an all over approach. Cross fit for supes all the way.

Siobhan - oh no, no exercise for me. Thanks!

9. What is the longest they’ve ever slept in?

Ava - 6 AM (late to bed, early to rise for this lady)

Kit - I was knocked out for multiple days, does that count?

Nora - Noon, my beauty sleep is very important.

Siobhan - noon, pub crawl in uni. I regretted it afterwards.

10. They’re on their way to the hospital when they hit a parked car. They can’t stop, and don’t have paper for a note. They drive away without telling anyone what happened. How do they ease their conscience?

Ava - has a mild panic attack, her brain immediately goes to what if she gets her drivers license taken away. Would probably go to Max for advice as she does with most things. Then goes for a run to ease her nerves.

Kit - No one was hurt, she's not too worried. She might go to the shooting range to help her try and forget her fuck up.

Nora - that's what PR is for. They have insurance, why would it be her problem?

Siobhan - dives into her work, buries her head, drinks an entire pot of tea. She's done worse before.

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dancing-cockroaches · 1 year

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HoooolYYYYY CRAPPOLAAAA

Since me and my husband moved, we no longer needed renters insurance. It was bundled with my auto through Allstate. We could share a renters policy, but even then had to have separate auto. They were like sorry y'all are pretty much strangers to eachother come back when its official. So anyway now that it's not bundled, my car insurance skyrocketed past $400 a month. I drive a fucking kia soul by the way, nothing fancy, insurance charges are just insane here. That's on the lower end I've been quoted, because oh bitch I looked.

So I know I say "my husband", we got into that habit despite the fact our marriage license [application/information] is still sitting at the marriage bureau. A few hiccups caused the finalization to be delayed. Literally last second at the ceremony, as in right before it, we had to be like "oh yeah uh.. due to sudden circumstances we're gonna need that paperwork to not be official so this is just gonna be like a last second symbolic thing now". So they gave us a (very obviously fake) souvenir one instead lmaooo. Like health insurance (being on his policy would be pricey, being married would make me unable to remain under my dads). But right now, I don't give a rat's ass about health insurance despite the fact my body is in such shambles (inability to stay asleep for more than 3 hours, complete loss of appetite, severe eczema covering my already sickly skeletal appearance. My entire abdomen/tittays, back, arms, bootayy, reaching up my neck & collarbone to my face shit is painful bitch it fuckin hurteth) that it's noticeable enough to make others look at me in shock like "damn bitch you are not ok, I am legitimately concerned". Like yeah I should really go to a doctor, I can go a month without it until insurance kicks in from my new job. At this point, fuck health insurance it's no longer my primary concern, that would be car insurance since I legally need it to get to work and make money to pay that ridiculous amount. I could be told I have a severe staph infection from my eczema (a small part of a particularly bad area is already starting to possibly look infected, no I DO NOT scratch it, I know that just makes it worse, i always either use an ice pack or rub with the palm of my hand) and the first thing on my mind would be "ok bitch who cares when I'm having to pay HALF A GRAND FOR FUCKING CAR INSURANCE".

The thing is, my man's got that USAA savings. Already got a quote on my car if it were under his policy, shit would drop down to around $50-$100. I immediately called him up like "we gotta get that paperwork finalized. I dont care if I have to drag a random bystander off the street to be the damn witness, or if we have to do it at 2 am or whatever weird time since the bureau is open 24/7, I ain't paying over $400 a month". So this weekend. Definitely. Hopefully. Because Allstate over here trying to make my heart stop with their bullshit.

Getting married for health insurance is out, getting married for auto insurance is in.

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elekinetic · 2 years

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hey bestoe,, if you want, list 5 things that make you happy, then put the same message in the ask box of the last 10 people that reblogged something from you! again, if you want ofc no pressure :]

thank you @moonriseblueeyes and @sunflowersand-butterflies for also sending me this! ❤️❤️

1. playlists. if there’s one thing i’ll do, it’s make a playlist. i’m shamelessly plugging my spotify bc it’s my happy place

2. st tumblr. i haven’t been involved in fandom like this since i was 16. it’s nice. don’t get me wrong, i didn’t miss the internet miscommunication or misinterpretation bullshit. but y’all? y’all get it. you guys make it fun to be back :)

3. driving. i got my license this summer. i don’t get to drive alone often bc my mom doesn’t trust me w her car (i’m not insured), but joyrides to the coffee shop and back are nice. blasting music, windows down. i’m living a cliche and i’m getting it.

4. parties. god. i didn’t have much of a social life in hs and i started college in the middle of the pandemic. this has been the first summer i’m home and MISSING my social life. i miss my friendssss and having fun and staying out late. i have a weekly board game meet up i go to every thursday that ends at 11pm but sometimes we go to a pizza place after and hang out til 2am. god. i’m glad to be going back to college in a week.

5. my job/major/career/life. i don’t know how to say it in a way that doesn’t feel amateur, but i’m a screenwriter. i’m gonna tell stories for the rest of my life. i’m at the beginning of it. i’m wrapping up my first internship and now it’s not just an abstract idea. im in it. i just can’t wait to keep going :)

#comic con panel #thanks for sending these #y’all are wonderful <3

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nickerson-insurance-agency · 4 months

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Nickerson Insurance Agency

Recent news coverage has focused frequently on the ever-increasing cost of auto insurance.

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There are a lot of tourist hotspots in southeast Connecticut, so visitors should be prepared to wait in line for a while. There can be no slack time. Traveling from the state's northern to southern regions may be difficult. To view the beautiful New England fall foliage and beaches, you'll need a reliable vehicle and insurance. Both during the course of a typical workday and in one's free time, this holds true.

The crime rate is higher in urban regions since there are more people living there. It appears that there is a growing trend of careless drivers that imperil individuals in their cars. You endanger yourself and other motorists when you drive without a valid license. This type of protection is only available through a licensed insurance agent or broker. Therefore, it's crucial to get car insurance that also covers passengers. In light of the high cost of emergency room visits following accidents, the charge quoted above seems fair. If this problem could be resolved, car trips with the family would be much more pleasurable.

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Nickerson Insurance serves a large number of Connecticut residents from its Waterford location. Consult a professional if you need help figuring out your insurance needs. We've worked hard to establish ourselves as Waterford, Connecticut's go-to insurance agency. The quality of our offerings has improved dramatically as a result of these two adjustments. Our customer isn't restricted to the residents of Stonington and Waterford; they come from all over the country to shop with us. We'll help you get the minimal required auto insurance coverage. Use the work we've put in for your benefit. We can't relax till this crucial step is taken. If we knew the true value of our labor, everything would change.

It is a great privilege to have been selected as your insurance provider in the United States. Our dedication to superior service has earned the trust of our clientele. We will spare no effort to ensure your safety. We guarantee that we will always go above and beyond your expectations. As a result, we're going to make every effort to ensure success. Because we know that every driver has their own preferences and needs, we've made it easy to choose from a wide variety of options. The families of those killed in yesterday's terrible highway accident are in our thoughts and prayers. Don't wait any longer; the time to act is now. Nickerson Insurance Agency provides no-cost, no-commitment insurance quotes. Our competitors' prices tend to be higher, but ours tend to be lower. Nickerson Insurance Agency is your go-to source for reliable vehicle insurance in Waterford and all of Connecticut. You can now proceed with the business deal thanks to this renewed assurance. In all the years we've been in operation, we've never had to resort to aggressively seeking out new clients. There will be no changes to the pricing or quality. Many customers come from far away in order to take advantage of our low prices, large inventory, and central location.

Don't lend someone your car if you suspect they'll use it to gamble away your money. Nickerson Insurance Agency offers competitively priced and all-encompassing auto insurance policies. Waterford and Stonington have reached a conclusive agreement. A pioneer in the American insurance industry since its founding in 1932, Nickerson is a household name. If you need help finding cheap car insurance, we're here to help. If you don't provide me further information, I can't help.

#auto insurance company in ct

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marcholasmoth · 9 months

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OSRR: 3297

today was a bit of a shitshow, but it worked out in the end.

i forgot i had a doctors appointment today when i went to bed last night. it was at 9;30.

i woke up at 9:26.

looked at my email like i usually do, realized that i had something in my calendar, and shot outta bed, threw on what i wore yesterday, fixed my hair, went to the bathroom, and left in a flurry, all the while on the phone to call the office and tell them i'm late and trying to reschedule if necessary.

thankfully, someone in the office was like "oh don't worry, we'll get you in" and i was there half an hour later. sheesh.

they dilated both of my eyes. i was not expecting that.

but i had shit to do, so i put on my sunglasses and made my way back, driving carefully but knowing i still had the capacity to see what i needed - signs, markings on the road, other cars, pretty much everything except the fine lines of license plate numbers. and it was just kinda bright.

but i made it back safely, with lunch in tow, and had lunch with joel. i went upstairs after and worked with a student for two hours before finally showering and then getting dressed again to take my car to the shop for a quote for the repair. it was maybe half an hour or so and i walked out with a quote and the need to discuss it with james. he'll be able to do it for less, especially since they just quoted surface level stuff, nothing on the inside, and it was already ridiculous. so i'm not gonna go there.

anyway, i went back and i grabbed my stuff and i came home. we had turkey clubs for dinner and i'm in bed now with lots of plans for tomorrow and wishing that i had a day to do research and make phone calls so i could get everything ironed out that i need for the end of the month. just a day, where every agency i need to talk to is open, has an immediate person to talk to who can immediately solve my problems, and the ability to update everything all at once and knowing exactly what it entails. i have to figure out insurance. that's my problem.

anyway, at least it's bedtime.

#molly rambles #operation srr #osrr #3000s #3200s #sunshine boy

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nityarawal · 1 year

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I completed all dental work last week!

I saw eye Dr Monday for several hours. He ran many tests and could only propose surgery to plug tear ducts for 6 months to stop bugs coming out!

Some kind of fungus us still going after 90 day cleanse- continuing herbs & natural Dr's protocall- but I need my assets to move forward now with my kids.

I've tried many social workers, 100's of attys & law enforcement/Courts totally failed my family.

I'm sick of their gross Dr's & officers chasing us and sexually assaulting me & my family.

Please settle with ex.

Dr. Natalya & Dr. Cash have tried for 3 months to get me a referral to Infectious diseases and Dermatology.

We feel IEHP & Medical system has failed in medical emergencies and do to foul play they cost my health in tick as well as covid germ warfare. .

This place below will take medical & iehp but insurance companies & drs fail to cooperate. Blue Shield & Triple A have Stirling men complicit hurting my mommy friends & I. Airbnb & real estate brokers are in on ponzi scams with sex Stings at courts.

This is a state/County emergency.

Dr. Scott Partlow says he took a bribe on my court case through corrupt system and boys clubs. He sold Elizabeth Rojo to hospital on a 72 hour hold because she wouldn't sleep with him and was escaping her Abusers. He threatened to slander me too because I didn't want him to touch me and he violated me.

We need to close these de-licensed Dr's down.

If a Dr. or cop loses licenses its for good reason.

Dr. Sunil Rawal needs to be delicensed and deported for ponzi scam against my family.

Please have all criminal's money's donated to my charities so I can attend to mothers correctly.

Pimping pregnant woman to Trafficking Dr's and hospitals on foul play is unacceptable.

Dr. Scott Partlow was trafficked by his father Bruce Paltrow and his Jewish dad trafficked by neo- nazis. Darin David Joye should be sponsored by George Harrison if he's their Illegitimate brother- not my family and bribes from attys!

Only way to stop cycle of Germ war & gigolos is to de-bug and deport all parasites at court.

Our tax dollars shouldn't be paying for all these celebrity Illegitimate brats to hustle my country.

We need full reperations from UK & America NOW!

All kids returned.

No Britney & I don't agree to pimp our sons out to University of Hawaii.

It's bad enough they prostitutes my brother & threaten to rape our kids constantly! No thankyou!

Thanks!

Nitya Huntley Rawal

https://www.yelp.com/biz/advanced-dermatology-and-skin-cancer-specialists-palm-springs-palm-springs

Need x rays sent to [email protected] fire Judith and Alexi for foul play at Cathedral City & medical malpractice. We know they took bribes to cancel appointments 3 days in a row. Need full reperations on insurance.

Close office. Is Dr. Sina OK or is he in a conservatorship?

Thanks!

Nitya Rawal

Need you to file this with IRS so they stop stealing from me and harassing family. I need a refund on tax returns. You sold me out on bribes and promise money that never came! I'm not paying for 18 months wrongful rental car arrest or rapes from government. You need to fix this now or LNC bank and Wells Fargo needs to refund for all rents, legal fees and utilities since 2016 violent scam!

On Thu, Mar 2, 2023, 3:44 PM nitya rawal <[email protected]> wrote:

Hi message Mr. Stapleton & Mathew Robert's daily. No one confirmed or called back about your Dr's appointment today. I asked Christopher to cancel it.

I'm seeing my dentist about these parasites you gave me & am leaving state this weekend with my kids.

We can't risk anymore violence from your mentally incompetent defense team. Do your homework & send in my files. You don't need anymore data or DNA from my family. You've violated us with extreme racism on Gag orders. No. I won't be quiet about your violence or sexual assaults and I will leave to a stare that's closing your defense down if you can't perform today. Sandiego, Riverside & LA are parasitic con artists scamming our people.

Thanks!

Nitya

Friendly reminder: Nitya's Western Dental appt is on 03/03/2023 at 03:00PM at Cathedral City 69160 Ramon Rd,92234. Covid screening reqd. Reply STOP to opt out.

Rest of spirochete video & thread is posted on Twitter for legal/medical/court team:

https://twitter.com/nityalakshmi108/status/1631323994514399232?t=d6Y5hVEduOcUstUCZO-N8w&s=19

---------- Forwarded message ---------

From: Vanessa Navarette <[email protected]>

Date: Thu, Mar 2, 2023, 12:53 PM

Subject:

To: [email protected] <[email protected]>

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conflictandscotchblog · 1 year

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Lights, Camera, Pull Over

There are many things that make us jump, but none so more than the red-and-blue lights of a police cruiser burst from your rear view mirror.

Anyone who has driven with me, or behind me, know that I drive in the right lane at speed limit or below. Once, a friend drove behind me on the highway. After a few minutes, my cell phone lit up.

“Al, is that you?”, she laughed. “You drive like a turtle!”

Slow and steady wins the race.

So, the few times I was pulled over by the police, it was not for speeding.

About four years ago, the day before Christmas Eve, I dropped off supplies for a family gathering. With bad weather conditions forecast, I wanted to ensure that, if I couldn’t make the trip on the day of the party, my contribution would not be missed.

Afterwards, to get home, I had to take Route 31 in New Jersey. Let me preface this with, I hate Route 31. The road twists and turns so much that cars coming toward me look like they are in my lane. Now, throw in it was twilight and an absolutely driving rain/snow storm.

In my mind, a head-on collision was imminent.

To avoid that fate, under the rain and snow and death machines flying at me, I hugged the fog-line on the highway like we were dating.

Guess I squeezed a little too tight, because within seconds the red-and-blue lights beckoned me to pull over to the shoulder.

I turned on my interior lights, gathered my documents, and waited for the officer to appear by my driver’s side window, which was half-open to limit the amount of water that invaded my car.

When the officer arrived I hand over my documents, then we chatted a bit. His concern was that I periodically swerved over the aforementioned fog line.

He inquired that, since it was a few days before Christmas, perhaps I was coming from a work Christmas party and maybe had a few drinks?

At this point I have to either bluff my way through or tell him the truth.

Well, truth hurts, but here we go.

“No Christmas party, I just hate driving on this road and driving at night. I feel like the cars are driving at me, and in this weather, I prefer the fog line to the center line.”

A long pause followed, then…

“OK,” he handed me back the documents, “you have a good night.”

So, back to the highway of death I went.

Spoiler alert, I didn’t die.

Now jump to last week. Just a few miles from my house, on a two-lane back road, the car behind me exploded with red-and-blue lights and insanely bright headlights blinded me.

On the shoulder, turned on the interior lights, lowered the windows, and gathered my documents. The officer, now framed in my passenger door window, asked for my license, insurance, and registration which I promptly handed to him.

He introduced himself, and informed me that I was being filmed.

That was bad because I heard the camera adds about fifty pounds.

The officer then asked, “Do you know why I pulled you over?”

Told him no, I did not.

“Well,” he continued, “you weren’t speeding (which comes as a surprise to no one) but I noticed you swerved over the double line a few times. Where are you coming from?”

Then added, “Did you have anything to drink?”

I told him I was coming from The Rail, in Whitehouse, which is a bar/restaurant that does trivia on Wednesday nights (maybe too much of a back story) and that I had two glasses of red wine between 7:30 and 9:30.

In a very short time I found myself standing behind my car. The police cruiser’s headlights illuminated me to cars that passed.

“First,” the officer stated, “stand up straight with your feet together.”

With feet together, I turned into a Weeble about to fall down. At my age, and with a blind spot in my right eye, my sense of balance has been compromised over the years, and this would be a horrible time to waver.

“Keep your head straight, and follow my pen with your eyes.”

(Don’t fall over, don’t fall over, don’t fall over)

“Okay.”

The pen in front of me moved left to center to right. I followed with my eyes, but then:

“Don’t move your head.”

“Sorry.”

Center, left, center.

“Don’t move your head.”

“Sorry.”

You would be surprised how hard it is, standing on the side of the road, at night, bathed in the beams of a police car, not to move your head as an officer waves a pen across your field of vision.

After a few more minutes the officer, convinced I was not drunk, told me I could leave.

Back in my car, hands firmly cast at ten and two on the wheel, I made it back to my house unscathed.

Hopefully, in the future, no red-and-blue lights will come alive in my rear view mirror ever again.

Remember, slow and steady wins the race.

Maybe I should make a bumper sticker.

#Police #drinking #trivia #driving

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beaversatemygrandma · 1 year

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WHERE THE FUCK DID FEBRUARY GO? WASN'T THERE SUPPOSED TO BE A WHOLE MONTH HERE? Shit's coming up fast, oh god.

So, i have an appointment for my driver's test in March, and essentially through this entire month i was like "finish the log. finish it. write things in. do it." I got to 37 hours of 60. Oi. And then the fact that i literally CANNOT drive at night in this area. Between the light pollution of the city, those HUGE LED billboards that light up half the highway, and those new cars with retina burning headlights, I've literally struggled to keep my eyes adjusted to the night and nearly missed a fucking stoplight. I need 10 night hours. I have done 1 and realized it was pointless. I think i can back home though. Smaller town. Less light pollution. I mean, i know I've actually driven the right amount by now, but i haven't been writing that shit down. Even my dad was like "you're ready, just fuck the log" and i was like "okay, cool" I need to grab another page (WHY DOES IT HAVE SO FEW SPACES FOR 60 HOURS???) and draw out the things and fill it in and then get my grandma and my dad's IDs and fill in ALL THE ID NUMBERS, get them to sign EVERY Single ONE. Hnngg. Then reminding my dad to take that day off to take me there. Like i've told him, but this is the man i definitely got my adhd from. Likely forgot by now. It's been like 3 months since i made the appointment (earliest one too. tf.)

And then the whole anxiety of all the plans I've made. Like, after getting my license i was going to prepare myself to move back to FL to be with my mom and around all my friends and such.

Like. I'm basically long distance dating this guy by now. We literally have plans set, just without date. Because I could either be there in April or i could be there mid summer or later, which is infuriating. Ntm the fact that my money is VERY Quickly dwindling. Like, it'll cost a couple hundred just in gas to get there. I'm already down to less than my car insurance payment that will go through in June. I was hoping I could get down there, get that job, etc etc, THEN pay it off. Because here, I'd be working in a place for like a month and then ditching. That's not ideal. So, I'm hoping my dad will help me pay for things in that aspect because holy fuck. I also really need to change my bank because after it got bought out, the new company was like "K. If you have less than $500 average in your checking you pay $8 a month for use." Like WHAT THE FUCK?? And THEN that fucking FYE VIP Charge that I DID NOT sign up for taking another $12 a month. I literally went through their customer service, they couldn't find my info, yet I'm Being Charged for something i DIDNT SIGN UP FOR. And well, a bank/card change would get rid of BOTH shitty little predatory charges here.

I've literally been going between those online banking services checking to see what's the best, because this bank charges me, cut my interest on my savings down like 95%, and is just inconvenient all together. Like, my dad has one, if i sign up with his code we both get $50, THEN the long distance guy has another where you get $100 if you get the banking thing AND a credit card with them for both parties. And I'm just here like "Oh god. Choices."

And then this guy. So, yeah, it has escalated a bit. He's the sweetest damn thing but every night it just somehow turns into, "I can't wait for us to finally be together" and me just thinking like "fuck if this doesn't work out right...." Like it has turned from me saying "why tf am i feeling things for that weird guy from high school? Bet I'm just lonely" to being like "Yep. I've definitely fallen for him." He's sweet, he's passionate, he's safe, and he's just great. He definitely cares a lot. There's something about the way he's outright trying to make sure I'm in a good place mentally and getting what i need to done and just being encouraging and a great company. Like yeah, half the motivation for getting things done lately is just making sure i can make it down there to stop this from being long distance. There's somebody down there who genuinely wants to be that person to just exist at home with and go on adventures about town with. Just somebody to have around for literally anything. Like. I CAME OUT TO HIM. He didn't even dodge the topic like my last ex did. It wasn't this awkward thing, it was just "as long as this makes you happy" and just jeez <3

then the worry about being with my mom again because FL rent is a waking nightmare. Like yeah, I'm going to get shit about my weight a lot and still have to pay HER rent, but i mean, it's better than being in this hellscape that is a metropolis and nearby people i like and trust. and not the constant hostility between people out here. I've come to the conclusion that people in cities are just awful and so stuck in their lives of nothing but work and the hell that is this place with no escape which has made them into what they are now. At no fault of their own, but they're all selfish assholes. Like everybody is struggling and packed in like sardines. Of course we're all on edge. But FUCK, be NICE to others for the love of god. We're all in the same cement hell.

I want peace, and peace is a place i know well. I want to be back home already and not panicking about all this shit and slowly going broke due to predatory capitalism. I want to be with that guy. I want to have my friends just ten minutes away. I want to be back in this familiar town i know like the back of my hand instead of this cement labyrinth of highways and skyscrapers. I'll settle for my old Panera job for a while. I just want something familiar that isn't this. I want peace again and a place that's loud and hostile isn't peace.

#taks speaks #screaming into the void

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