#theyre all on drugs 100%

[will-solace-aaaaa]

@superherokisser sorry if it's not good, it's in it's early stages😅 I haven't even properly re-read it yet to make sure it makes sense bc I'm tired and it's pretty much 12am rn, the chapter is called "cursed birthdays" but I also might change that:) also srry if it's too short I'm just rlly sleep deprived and I'm abt to pass out🥲❤️ gotta copy n paste it into tumblr now. It's 1396 words.

@nico-di-angelo-aaaaa

@camstargone

Here:

A Cursed Birthday

I woke up this morning thinking all was well, and it was just another ordinary day, for me, anyway. But no. I don't even get one birthday of peace. It's always something every year. I mean, last year,  a bunch of rats ate the cake. The year before that, my hamster, Charles,  the magnificent, committed suicide.  And this year, I get sucked into a magical portal. Yay.

It was normal. Nothing happened the entire day, and I was sceptic, to be honest. But no. The one thing that couldn't have happened (due to its... well. Impossibleness) just had to happen. Thanks a lot, God. I swear I'm cursed or something.

It was around 8 pm by the time I finally let my guard down about my evil-birthday curse. I was walking my amazing dog, Ruby. She is this adorable black and white pitbull that puts any and all other dogs to shame. So naturally, I was showing her off... at 8pm, in winter. In my defence, I'm definitely not the smartest person I know. I mean, what lunatic would be out at 8 pm in winter, in the UK? Besides me, of course.

I was walking through the nearby park, like I usually do. But this time, something had caught my eye. The park was empty except for me and Ruby, but there was an object emitting some sort of blinding light. The kind that if you were to look at it for more than a few seconds, then when you would finally look away, you would have little dots dancing around your vision. When I picked it up, which I kind of see was a bad idea, it was like holding fire. I dropped the glowing thing, and Ruby started to bark at it, the burning feeling still prickling my hand. Then, right where the object had dropped, some sort of vortex had started to open, sucking me in. The last thing I remembered after that was falling.

Thankfully, the forest that I fell into had some pretty tall trees that cushioned my fall (not really). I angelicaly landed (crashed) onto the ground.'Ow! Damn it, who put trees here?' I yelled because it really really hurt. My body made this cracking sound, and my leg had bent in a super unnatural way. There was bone and a lot of blood. A lot. I blacked out (I don't know why, though)

When I woke up, I was on a bed in a sort of cabin-like room. There were 2 green sofas against the walls facing each other, with a little coffee table in the middle and a kitchen, in which I was in the middle of on a table, not a bed, which was probably why my back hurt like hell. There were two people in the kitchen, one baking some sort of bread and the other washing some dishes.

'Ow.' I winced as I tried sitting up. Pain shooted to my leg. 'Oh! You're awake.' Both people had turned around and were now looking at me. 'Your leg was pretty badly hurt. How did you manage to do that?' The girl said, looking at me with disapproval. She had long, blonde hair that looked so straight she wouldn't have to brush it for days, and it would still have zero knots in. Her green eyes seemed to dance like a flame. She wore a lovely white dress dotted with purple flowers and all sorts of jewellery. 'What?' I questioned, still not entirely sure of what was happening.

'I found you out in the forest. You were unconscious and badly hurt, so I took you and brought you here. We had to do something about your leg, though. Sorry.' She said, which confused me until I looked down.

'AHH!' I screamed. 'Calm down, it's not that big of a deal.' The man, a strong, muscular dude with dark skin adorned with freckles that looked to be in about his forties. 'Not that big of a deal!? My leg is gone!' I yelled. 'Where did it go? I had my leg this morning.' 'Now you dont.' He replied with a proud looking smile.

'Now I- where is my leg!' I demanded. I mean, who just takes people's legs off without asking? 'I told you we should have asked, dad.' The girl said to the man. 'Exactly! Thank you!' I said. 'You guys can't just take my leg!' I yelled, directing the words at the man. 'I'm Jericho, I prefer Eric though, since you didn't even ask before you chopped my leg off!' I said (cool name, I know). 'I'm Ariel, this is my dad, Sebastian.' She said. 'Well, Ariel, lovely to meet you.' I said, shaking her hand.

'I can make you a new leg, Jericho. No need to be a baby, now, is there?' He said with a grin on his face. Rude. Before I could say an awesome comeback, he started measuring my right leg (which was still there). After a while, he walked away to go make my new leg, letting me talk with Ariel. You could tell she was one of those really pretty girls who didn't try to be pretty.

'Soo... where is this because the last thing I remember is falling out of the sky.' I said, looking at her expectingly. 'This is Emaia. Also, what did you mean "falling out of the sky?"' She questioned, looking confused and tilting her head to the side. 'Well, I was just walking my dog, Ruby, and I kinda just fell, and there was this glow-y thing and- My dog! Ruby!' I yelled, standing up from my position on the sofa, forgetting about my leg and immediately falling to the floor. 'Ow.'

I'd forgotten all about Ruby! Did she fall through with me? Is she safe? A million things were going through my head, and I didn't even notice I was hyperventilating until Ariel's dad, Sebastian, had started to shake me lightly. I had managed to tuck myself into a weird looking ball against the couch because my left leg was, well, not there. After a long, long time of uneven breathing and being told everything would be okay, I finally was able to slow my breathing. 'Sorry.' I said. I mean, I just wasted these nice (ish) people's time. 'It's alright, love,' He said in the same soothing voice he had been using for the past 10ish minutes.'Ariel had been trying to calm you down for a while by the time I came back in here because I found you a leg that would match.

He went and got me the leg, and after him showing me take it on and off, he let me look in a mirror. Well... I looked like I had just fallen out of the sky. My dark hair was more matted than usual with a few leaves sticking out, a few cuts that would easily heal on my head from falling through branches, my new leg which was made out of a amazing-looking black metal and my clothes were covered in blood. While I was checking myself out, Ariel had explained what had happened before Seb had gotten there.

'Yeah, we are probably gonna have to find you some new clothes.' He said, patting me on the shoulder. "For now, you'll just have to borrow some of mine.' He said, Ariel going upstairs and grabbing me a pair of clothes that were 1000% too big. Man, he is bulky. The outfit looked like it came directly out of the 1900s, but still, I looked at amazing as always.

The prosthetic was really weird getting used to, but after three days, I was good enough not to trip every five seconds. I didn't want to wait any longer because I didn't want Ruby to be out there any longer. In my time staying, it wasn't that hard to figure out that I was nowhere near home. These guys didn't even know what Sonic the Hedgehog was!

Me and Ariel left to go look in the forest around where she found me, and Seb had to stay because he runs a bakery! (Who would've thought.) We left at 7, after having the best food I have ever eaten, except for the cake at my aunt Jessie's funeral. That was some good cake.

#*cuts off your leg* #why did you cut off my leg?!?!?!! #ill get you a new one #love my little sillies<3 #theyre all on drugs 100% #my silly little fucks #book #first book #1st chapter #im so so so sorry if its horrible #im rlly dyslexic and had to use my gramarly #like stfu gramarly #no that is not a typo #go fuck yourself gramarly #taking the fucking piss #gramarly #meow #jericho williams

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

someone has never lived with a coke addict. lmao

no but for real i see these posts a lot and while the basic idea is 100 % correct (drug addiction and homelessness are not personal or moral failures and people affected deserve respect and dignity), they usually take a direction or have implications i dont agree with.

first off, drug addiction is not a class issue. people of all backgrounds are drug addicts. ceos too. so i dont know what this has to do with leftism? as someone who struggles with substance abuse and for that reason has lived with and been around addicts, there are good reasons for people to be biased against them. in active addiction, many people are erratic, unpredictable, and egoistic. being wary of active addicts is self-preservation, not „bourgeois“ or whatever the reference to leftism is supposed to imply. this is also partly a gendered issue because men tend to exhibit addiction, egoism, and aggression at higher rates than women.

secondly, especially at the intersection of homelessness and drug addiction - i see a lot of these posts taking the direction of „mind your business if a homeless man is next to you mumbling to himself“ etc - it seems these people also romanticise what drug addiction with nothing to lose can do to a person. a friend of mine was hit in the face by a homeless man walking by, someone else i know was stabbed by a homeless man after they took him in. just because someone is underprivileged you dont have to stop listening to your insticts and keeping your distance to erratic and intoxicated men who seem like they might do something unpredictable. this doesnt just mean homeless men by the way, i dont trust any men exhibiting this behavior, and yeah would possibly call the cops if someone like that hung around my home or work (never have though).

on the other hand, when a homeless woman was hanging out in the hallway i let her be. my neighbor wanted to call the cops but i told her not to. personally i dont even care if she shoots up there, but if i had kids i might not want her around either.

are homeless drug addicts vulnerable and more likely to be harmed than harm someone else? yeah. do cops and doctors treat homeless people like shit? yeah. these are important conversations to have, but i wish they would happen without romantisation.

talk to any woman who has worked with homeless men, myself included - marginalisation is not virtue. many still harrass and even assault women. and these posts never take a gendered perspective: how most homeless and drug addicted women land in prostitution, how they are not safe in homeless shelters because of the men, etc.

im not saying op here said all of this but from the tone (and the tags and reblogs) it struck me as one of those posts that shames people for being alert around drug addicts and alcoholics when there is ample reason to, especially if youre a woman and theyre a man. and they never take a gendered perspective which is really important in this context, as it usually is.

#happy if this starts a conversation and more women chime in with criticism on my take and your own takes! #shit talking #drugs #also while developing drug addiction or losing your home is not your fault. you still need to hold people accountable for their actions #for their own sake! especially with drug addiction its not good to tell people its the systems fault because many understand this as there #is nothing you can do. #and you cant expect people to take care of someone who needs professional help #you know this saying about how a drowning person will pull you down with them? #i 100 % think that homeless people are not supported in the right way #i 100 % support free and safe housing for everyone small individual rooms with a bathroom. everyone shoulf have access to that #and i think talking to friendly homeless people is good and important and not look away but it doesnt mean you have to accept behavior drug #addicts usually exhibit #its a complex topic that requires nuance

[oliviawebsite]

drug testing also shares intersections with disability discrimination. people with chronic pain and other conditions that require heavy medication to provide even a semblance of relief are filtered out for taking stuff that is completely legal for them to take. they say you can disclose prescribed medications that would come up on the test but do you really think theyre hearing that and absorbing that info in good faith? they dont care if u take vicodin for back pain they dont care if you cant even stay awake without adderall. its all an excuse to not hire you while maintaining plausible deniability against intentional discrimination. dont even get me started on urinalysis testing for cannabis in states where its 100% legal! you could go 3 months without ingesting any weed whatsoever and still come up dirty and get screwed out of a job for one of the softest drugs on the planet that also happens to be used by a lot of chronic illnees sufferers for a plethora of reasons. it makes me so mad. furthermore even if its recreational who cares. as long as they do their job just shut the hell up and let them work if they so desire. its not complicated at all.

[theramusen]

EVIL DOUBLED (FNAF AU)

This was sorta just for fun while I do school and what not! AU idea where Henry and William are BOTH evil and work together!

This screenshot redraw is what started it all!

Thats William’s remnant in there btw hes sorta michael-mode rn but theyre gonna put it back in him once theyre done posing all cool- He JUST survived being springlocked for the first time

Now lets get into ref sheets! (There will be a page break after and all lore/info about the au will be down there!)

OK SO!!! The au def is similar to canon a lot and so

The MAJOR plot changes would be:

-Will and Henry BOTH get springlocked

•this fucks over Cassidy and CC being in Fredbear already though, so to solve this issue Cassidy, CC, and Charlie, will all share the puppet.

-Henry now occupies Fredbear instead, and so we now get Springtrap and Beartrap.

-William does NOT have time for the wife murder subplot, so Mrs. Afton (Clara) gets to live fully, she replaces Henry now. Diving into the duo’s blueprints and creations so she can one day stop them. She works with Michael.

-Henry’s wife is ALIVE! Her name is Dorothy and she returns to Hurricane after receiving a call from Clara. She also becomes a Henry replacement.

-Because of Clara and Dorothy’s new role, the pizza sim speach is now WAY more female rage style. This is the wrath of scorn mothers. UCN will be 100000x worse.

-Oh and no disks- William tries to push them but Henry 100% shuts them down and thinks theyre dumb.

-So fnaf 4 is JUST cc’s dying nightmare and eventually michael DOES get gas drugged and sees the nightmares but thats NOT fnaf 4 thats just a bad trip!

-Also, with William not being able to run rampant with random robot murder (Henry keeps him in check) we DO see the base finale in pizza sim.

-When we get into help wanted, ar, security breach, and ruin that follows a SECOND plot line fully separate from the first, where we see a surge of copy-cat killers (this is where we get characters like Vanessa and Jeremy, and Gregory will also be a part of this, being the main villain in Ruin now bc the Mimic was never made)

-William and Henry are a good team here, mutual bond and gain.

-William is far more explosive and emotional, his drive coming from CC’s death sorta setting off a domino effect of underlying mental health issues. He just kinda loses it. This team gives him the delusion that he may one day see CC again.

-Henry is in it bc hes a capitalist. And hey, turns out unlike electricity, theres NO remnant bill. So making all his robots run on human souls is cheaper! He doesnt really care much about charlie after like 3 months of her being dead. He knows it was William. He doesn’t care.

GENETICS?!

yeah theres genetics-

not gonna draw out the punnet squares but the colors of the characters ARE genetic traits!

Henry’s grey is a rare recessive trait. So it was EXTREMELY unlikely to pass onto Charlie. Which it didnt.

Dorothy’s green is a common dominant trait, Charlie ended up green like her!

William and Clara are BOTH purples. William is a more blue-purple, Clara is a more red-purple (commonly mistaken for pink!)

Both purples are dominant traits, so it is a 50/50 with their offspring to produce a blue-purple or red-purple.

Michael and Elizabeth both ended up red-purple!

Michael is VERY red-purple, very much almost mistaken for pink like his mom.

Elizabeth is closer to true purple than michael, but still red-purple!

CC is the only afton child to end up blue-purple! If he hadnt died he wouldve ended up being Williams favorite child!

#fnaf #fnaf art #fnaf au #evil doubled au #evil doubled #art #digital art #au #ramu au #alternate universe #william afton #michael dont leave me here #michael afton #henry emily #fnaf characters #modified sprite forms #purple guy #silly #ok bye bye

[uranium]

been insane about the "dont abuse prescription drugs" comic all day because nothing has ever described my relationship with other people so well but i went back and the artist was saying it was about them being unable to truly care about anything and it saddening people they love when theyre always nonchalant and unable to fully connect.

which is really interesting to me because my problem is that i burn at like 100% all the time over the things i do love and i end up hollowing out everyone who gets close to me. i dont understand why the world isnt in caffeinated technicolor for everyone else. people think its fun to join me for a while until they get tired and i just keep going at lightspeed unable to slow down for them. the artist keeps trying to turn themselves up and i keep trying to turn myself down but i think we both experience other humans in a very similar way

#idk how to describe it #i love people very hard but i love living so much too and i cant bear to calm down to love them how they seem to want #my love is loud but to experience it you also need to deal with the deafening noise of everything else i also care about

[magnuscomedybracket]

Round 2 Match 10

049 The Butcher's Window vs. 034 Anatomy Class

Propaganda under the cut!

049 The Butcher's Window

Guy complains about how shitty a drug mule another guy is for 90% of the ep and then oh yea some guy stole his bones

034 Anatomy Class

The delivery. The teacher going crazy because students asking questions.

#fear beings who want to know more about the human body and decide to go to college about it

#all those “students” had like. sneak 100 surely their behavior was completely unsuspicious lmao #and at the end theyre genuinely just like “hey thanks for teaching us about the insides” and the teacher's just completely traumatized

#tma #the magnus archives #magpod #magnuspod #polls #tournament #round 2 #i decided to add tag propaganda if it's particularly funny or compelling #lmk if u want urs removed though... thanks ily

[br1ghtestlight]

"hello burger lady!! tiny people. BOB."

THE SLOW HEAD TURN WHILE FISCHOEDER IS STARING AT THEM LMAOO he's such a freak. what is he doing

aww linda put a smiley face on the check thats so cute. "nooo i enjoyed it :)"

A BROTHERHOOD?? BLOOD OATH? love how louise hears this and immediately stands up she's like hello. hello im interested. PLEASE let me into your blood oath club mr fischoder

babalon like the ancient uhh. thing.

ooooh :0

(also my dad used to call my mom babalon among MANY other creative insults when they were married and this immediately brought that memory back to me. but he said it like babble-on like she was babbling. sorry idk why i wanted to share that)

"and the other members already picked all of the best chefs in town soo im asking you" i literally dont believe fischoeder lmao he definitely just wanted bob to come along as his personal chef and couldn't come up w/ a better excuse like. come on

"a billion dollars" "nope." "a million dollars" "no...." "a billion dollars :D" "she just said that"

i know bob is holding onto fischoeder's back bcuz he cant see but also its like. kinda intimate?? like?

also love bob's new jacket. these are the kinda things you only notice when you've watched WAAYY too many bob's burgers episodes but its a nice jacket :) the blue color suits him. and it has a hood

personally i would be a little more concerned that mr fischoeder only has one eye and it is NOT looking in the direction of the dangerous sharp cliff theyre walking beside. i know he's driven bob in his boat before but he's SOO BLIND WHY ARE YOU WILLINGLY GETTING IN A BOAT WITH HIM <- saying this as someone who doesn't really have vision in one eye or depth perception. i wouldnt give in a boat with myself driving either

"it was actually kinda fun to come up with!! i-i hope you like it :)" bob is so sweet im gonna cry. he's so excited about cooking SOMEONE LET HIM RANT ABOUT HIS SPECIAL INTEREST RIGHT NOW. he's in autism heaven

NOT THE TIKTOK MENTION 😭😭

recognize some of these guys from the gingerbread house episode which was another horrible experience for bob lmao

"can i keep hiiim? 🥺" what is his PROBLEM

WAS HE WORKING THE OMLETTE STATION AT YOUR LAST SEX PARTY??? <- brand new sentence

also this 100% confirms to me that fischoeder has had sex with every old ass man on this camping trip bcuz NO WAY he's getting rich old woman pussy im sorry. i do think he's bisexual but his sex parties are male-exclusive. he fucked those old men

not looking forward to whatever is going to happen to bob in this episode.

I ALWAYS FORGET FISCHOEDER IS LIKE A HARDCORE DRUG ADDICT remember that time he did mushrooms in s13 That would explain some things. that weren't already explained by the alcoholism

bob is surprisingly chill considering the circumstances and the fact that he's getting less than a thousand dollars of restaurant equipment out of this. i know he trusts fischoeder (for some reason i dont entirely understand) but being blindfolded and taken to a secret island with a bunch of rich old men and having NO CELL SIGNAL and everybody is drugged as hell.... he doesn't even know where he is..... GIRL RUN‼️‼️

also there's only one bed in fischoeder's tent which means there's either a seperate camping section for the chefs (unlikely) he expects bob to sleep outside in the storm (very likely) or bob and fischoeder are going to have to share a bed 👀👀 i know its probably not going to be addressed but i need somebody to write And There Was Only One Bed bob x fischoeder fanfic about this episode immediately. like that needs to happen

bob realizing that the chances of him dying on this camping trip are quickly reaching eighty or ninety percent ooh he's COOKED

"Don't wear brown and black. Never look into someone's eyes..." "Bring your own fork. And briefcase." "Of course. Everyone knows that." "And leave one of your shoes as a gift." "But you have to hide it..." gene and louise are SOO silly i love them so much. they play off each other so well its like a constant improv class

this subplot is Trying To Teach Tina Social Skills meanwhile gene and louise don't have them either they just dont give a fuck about learning them. well louise knows them she just disregards them. gene doesn't know ANYTHING

HAHAHA BOB REALIZING THEYRE LEAVING HIM THERE TO DIE. ITS NEVER BEEN MORE OVER love him not even acknowledging their crazy fire drug-induced dancing he's so used to this bullshit. bob should get a week off after this MINIMUM but we all know he loves cooking too much for that

NOT MR FISCHOEDERS GAY ASS HIP SHAKE?????????

mfw im the only sober person at a crazy drug party full of rich people on an island during a deadly storm and its only Tuesday. 😐

UH OH IS THE CORRECT RESPONSE. BOB REALIZES HES SO FUCKED

aww its kinda cute he's making sure that fischoeder is taken care of too and packing up all their things. dad instincts

at a certain point u kinda have to call him calvin dude. like you're WELL past "mr fischoeder" territory in this situation <- is also calling him mr fischoeder in this review

"shh he's hunting us" is probably NOT what bob wanted to hear

there's something about this that is sooo.....

in defense of bob he has almost died or been killed with fischoeder SEVERAL times before this episode including in the movie. its like a male bonding thing for them at this point

"and i invented a new way to tie a tie" I KNEW I WASNT CRAZY FOR THINKING THAT LOUISES TIE WAS TIED WRONG IN THAT SCREENSHOT i love that i picked up on that and felt the need to point it out. having never worn a tie before in my life (not to my knowledge at least)

this is literally what it feels like when ur autistic and trying to understand neurotypical social conventions. tina is trying SO HARD she's such a sweet girl :( its okay baby girl i understand i get it

THE BITEY GUY HAS A NAME BOB

am i allowed to say that bob with wet hair is kinda 👀👀🔥

why'd he kiss him like that ??

he's suuuch a sweetie in his oversized jacket <3

"No, no. Plants don't like sweet drinks!" "Just hard liquor?"

"dad is missing a WILD night" *hard cut to bob tied up and being used as a human sacrifice for cannibalism*

WHAT WAS RHAT. WHY DID CALVIN LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT. YES IM USING HIS LEGAL FIRST NAME BCUZ WTF WAS THAT GAY ASS GUILTY LOOK?? HES NEVER BEEN GUILTY BEFORE he care so much about bob im gonna throw up. what the hell

HE LIIIKES HIM 😭 HE FELT GUILTY BCUZ HE LOVES AND CARES ABOUT BOB THIS IS SO FUCKED UP 😭😭💕

he probably also feels guilty that this is like the sixth time he's gotten bob into a near death situation. like at a certain point it starts to feel personal yknow

*howling* "god. i hate when he does that"

straight up on the verge of a meltdown. i dont even blame him tbh

bob isnt WRONG but also we are talking about a crazy drugged up cannibal who thinks he's a wild animal so maybe we could leave saving him until tomorrow morning? like idk i feel like he wouldnt exactly fit on their dingy. and even if he did what if he bites

"and you do have to come for ice cream!! it wont be any fun without you" okay thats kinda cute. this episode definitely kept up to pace with the insane homoerotic relationship between bob and fischoeder and im happy about that. almost gave us the tiniest hint into what fischoeder really feels/thinks about bob which. yeah

VERY UNHINGED EPISODE BUT REALLY FUN AND CUTE?? everything between bob and fischoeder was so. soo. yknow. and the subplot was funny and cute too :) very sweet little episode i always love when they go off on adventures like w/ teddy in sea me now. and of course their (many many) near death experiences together thats truly what its all about baby!!! really enjoyed this episode it was exactly the right amount of unhinged and funny

#txt #bob's burgers #episode review

[she-ismysun-archive]

🚨 THE ROOKIE 6x02 SPOILERS 🚨

do not read if you don’t want spoilers. Holy shit 100th episode started off with a BANGER. This is my live blog thread.

DADDY COP? FOR REAL? WHAT A FUCKING INTRO. NO WONDER ZANDER RANDOMLY BROUGHT IT BACK UP ON HIS INSTAGRAM.

100 SPARKLE INTRO ✨✨✨

Henry missed his flight???? NAAAUUU

HELLO CHASTITY AND SKIP TRACER RANDY. HE SKIP TRACER BOUNTY HUNTED PETE LOL. I literally can’t stop screaming. I can’t stop SCREAMING. I feel so feral

Chastity is teaching him how to kiss! 😆😆

please 🫣 PLEASE TELL ME THEY DONT LOSE THE RING?

Oh brother. Aaron is not as ok as I thought he was or would be. Bro is NOT ok!!! He’s still benched for a reason. Wade will not make the same mistakes he did before. He will not lose another one.

Wow healthy communication? No. Angst continues. Please help me save me save ME. He’s so mad. She’s so hurt. Pleeeease our lovers will resolve this episode I said so!

OSCAR?

Henry missed the bullet train.

What is happening with Nyla and Celina rn. NARCOTIC POT?

MONICA?! Double fucking whammy

Friendship hugs. I said so. They’re friends. Please don’t force this romantic relationship :((

THEY PAWNED THE BAILEN WEDDING RINGS? DEADASS????

the hammer episode name drop 🫠

“No please don’t do me any favors” Angela please save us WAHH THEYRE BICKERING

Hello wedding DJ - womp womp drug dealer

BILLY BOB BENNET (the hammer)

Oh they’re scheming. Oh they’re scheming so hard

So I definitely misread this shot in the promo (they have not made up yet)

Eric Winter’s hardest fight scene of his entire career

Lucy negotiating is so fun

TIM OFFERING LUCY UP TO BE THE FIGHTER?? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU.

Tim get his shit rocked but he WINS - wait I just noticed Lucy holding his belt??

TIM? HOLDINF THE RING ON ONE KNEE Bdjdksnsksk

Goodnight Tim

HAHA “THE ROOKIE” NAME DROP

Nyla just calling Celina “the rookie” and she gets to do her first interrogation

No flower. Almost no ring. Almost no Henry?? ENJOY GIRLS NIGHT? SHES TRYING TO GET HENRY INTO THE COUNTRY.

CAKE TOO EARLY 🫣🫣 AND IT HAS COCONUT CREAM

Randy is the florist expert now (Ty ClipTok)

Ou they’re both. Gossiping about each other at the bachelors party

Lucy: he’s the problem

Tim: how do I prove to her that I’m not the problem?

DAMN IT. THEYRE GETTING DINNER TOGETHER NOW (Celina and Aaron) AND TIM WANTS TO MEET LUCY AT THE STATION

lie. detector. test.

LIE. DETECTOR. TEST. 🥹🥹🥹

YES. I LOVE YOU. HES A LYING LIAR WHO LIES?

he’s a. Lying liar. Who LIES 😭😭😭 it took a LIE DETECTOR TEST for him to ACCEPT that he doesn’t want Lucy to do UC work.

Luna’s getting her social work degree!

And of course their officiant doesn’t show up. Thank you Wade for saving the day

This wedding is so goddamn beautiful. Their vows are so fucking beautiful.

God they tricked me with all the happy promo shots of Chenford but their angst is far from over

Randy and Chastity is DJ-ing?? James saves the day with a playlist of his own.

Will Tim and Lucy make it out?? God I hope so! (I know they will but this is hurtinggg)

AARON. GOOD GOD. They were laying that on THICK. And now Celina is leaving the wedding. God Celina please be ok

I just spent last night spiraling about “dog bring a live part”

They’re dancing but they’re going to talk. Yea you DO need to deal with it Tim. YOU ARE GONNA GET THROUGH THIS

SHE SAID IT BACK

The chenford wedding kiss 🥹

ITS JOEVER. IT IS JOEVER

Celina is in fact NOT OK. And Aaron is drunk off his ass. Of course why would Nolan have a peaceful wedding night when everything else went wrong.

Alright then. That was wrapped up quickly. Everyone quick thinking weeehh Everyone’s ok.

This is the third shot of them laying on their back? It’ll be fun to clip that together.

Well ok then.

I feel so betrayed and tricked but it was delulu of me to think they would make up that quickly!!! IT TAKES A LIE DETECTOR TEST FOR HIM TO ACCEPT THAT HE DOESNT LIKE THE IDEA OF HER DOING UC WORK? This is actually just so in character for them! This is actually just chenford being chenford because it took them going undercover as a couple to even CONSIDER the fact they have feelings for each other.

#the rookie #the rookie spoilers #the rookie 6x02 #liveblogging #initial thoughts #good god chenford #everything that coudlve went wrong did #lucy chen #tim bradford #the bailen wedding is so beautiful

[craycraybluejay]

i love how when u like to get high every once in awhile if even if ur lucky ur an evil unhealthy addict who doesnt care about anyone and it 'changes your personality' but when someone else takes pills every day that are going to give them early dementia before even trying Not Being Dependent on a Drug and looking for another solution they are good and healthy and morally correct and it definitely doesn't affect their personality at all even a little bit and it's definitely 100% safe to stay dependent on a drug for your mental health for years and years (ignore the long term side effect studies PLEASE we NEED your MONEY) and your plug is an evil person for giving people their fix but their psychiatrist is good and correct for giving people chemical lobotomies and somehow the fact that you get high sometimes means you're a badwrong person and is the same exact thing for your health as being addicted to meth crack and heroin.

and by love i mean hate. stop treating addiction like a moral judgement, stop expressing judgement disguised as fake concern that someone is an addict despite them not being dependent on or addicted to what you take issue with stop thinking you know what everyone's health and life looks like stop acting superior because your drugs are govt-sanctioned stop treating all substance use like it belongs in the same category of 'problem' because I am pretty damn sure that having a trip every once in awhile is not remotely the same thing as taking something daily and worrying that if you get off it it could actually literally kill you. genuinely. leave drug users the fuck alone and if you want to express concern do it with maybe someone you actually know well like family who you see is actively dependent on something and instead of telling them "stop ur a bad person u need to stop immediately" ASK THEM WHATS UP AND IF THEYRE DOING OK. ASK THEM WHY THEY TAKE WHAT THEY TAKE DAILY. ASK THEM IF THEY'VE TRIED ANY ALTERNATIVES AND REALLY LISTEN AND BELIEVE THEM WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT THEIR OWN EXPERIENCE AND STRUGGLES. SOMETIMES THERE IS AN ALTERNATIVE AND YOU CAN SUPPORT THE PERSON YOU CARE ABOUT IN LOOKING FOR HELP. SOMETIMES THERE JUST ISN'T AND YOU NEED TO FUCKING SUPPORT THEM ANYWAY AND NOT JUDGE THEM FOR WHAT DRIVES THEM TO ADDICTION OR DEPENDENCE BECAUSE TRUST ME NO ONE BECOMES AND STAYS AN ADDICT FOR FUN. ADDICTION IS NOT FUN. BE KIND AND STOP BEING A JUDGEMENTAL CUNT; PROTECT AND SUPPORT THE ADDICTS IN YOUR LIFE. BE UNDERSTANDING OF CASUAL USERS. JUST REALIZE THAT UR NOT SUPERIOR JUST BECAUSE YOU ARE SOBER. OKAY? GOOD!

#addiction #substance use #stop judging #rant #drugs #be kind #health #unless you are someone's doctor you don't know jack shit about their health. ok? ok! #and btw ur not a bad person if ur legitimately addicted to meth crack heroin either #u deserve kindness respect and if you want it help #u deserve to be safe and cared for #leave drug users alone jfc #your judgy behaviour helps no one in any way shape or form #ask to tag

[aftonfamilyvalues]

It’s funny how they say transphobia is basically a “gateway drug” for other forms of bigotry. If you’re transphobic, you’re probably also racist, antisemitic, and whatever they want to accuse you of in the moment. Of course, misogyny isn’t a big deal and as long as you’re only a little misogynistic you can still be a good person.

theres a lot of people who really love believing that if someone is one form of bad theyre all forms of bad. so if youre deemed transphobic youre also a pedophile and a fascist and racist and homophobic and antisemitic and sexist and everything under the sun too! they have to make people 100% evil in their minds.

#ask

[jinx-blackout-84]

My highschool quote book:

----

"Violence is never the answer.... unless it is" (said with a mischievous look)

----

"I won't give you a 100 on assignment you didn't do"

"Not even for my birthday?"

".....it's not your birthday"

----

"I'm going to lick your shoulder" -girl 1

"DO NOT LICK MY SHOULDER" -girl 2

"Then cover it up, whore." -girl 1

-----

"Here's the thing, if someone licks your shoulder because you don't have it covered, that's on you," - math teacher

----

"Okay but the submissionn didn't work and the document got deleted. I did the assignment, I swear!"

"What was the passage you had to read with the questions about, then?"

".....I prefer not to answer"

"Yeah. Sit down."

----

"You guys are great. Not because youre a good class, I hate this class, but because you all turned in your presentations, and I didn't expect any of you to do it." -English teacher

----

"Hey so the presentation was supposed to be between 3-5 minutes. Yours was 23 seconds." -English teacher

".......well you can't say I wasn't efficient!"

----

"Are those drugs or tictacs? If theyre adderall I want one"

"Tictacs."

(At least 6 dissapointed sighs)

----

(For refrence they are both straight guys)

"Stop using my phone to take pictures of guy 1, I don't even know him." -Me

"But he's so hottttt....." -guy 2

----

"Can I touch your nipples?" -guy 2

"Not in public, babe" -guy 1

----

"So I was walking past the makeout hallway"

Guy 2, excitedly, "THERES A MAKEOUT HALLWAY??? TEACHER ME AND GUY 1 NEED TO GO ON A BATHROOM BREAK"

"You need to not fail my class. Do your notes."

----

"Guy 2, can you stay over tonight?" -guy 1

"OoOoH do you want to kiss me????"-Guy 2

"No I want to play video games." - guy 1

----

"So basically we are making a petition so me and guy 5 can be cheerleaders" -guy 4

"so I'll see you in a skirt?" -guy 6

"yes." -guy 4

"Can I sign this more than once?" -guy 6

(They did not get to be cheerleaders)

----

"Okay, so you know the the college fair is today-" -math teacher

(Girl raises hand)

"Can I sleep on the floor instead of attending?" -girl 3

"Are you referring to actual college or just the college fair?" -math teacher

"Both. You never answered my question" -girl 3

"You may not sleep through the college fair." -math teacher

"This is why the school system is failing." -girl 3

----

"Penis exploding machine"

----

"Project emo"

----

"Is it a vape?" -English teacher

"...Its a highlighter" -4 people say at once (it was a pink highlighter)

----

"Google search how to kill your entire family?"

----

"I feel like the second someone becomes famous they are immediately imbued with the urge to touch children" -Me

----

"I wouldn't kill you guys, that's too much work." -English teacher

----

"Am I watching a drug deal happen right now? What is happening?" -English teacher

"No I just give him money because he's my friend"

----

"Pov: the girlies go on a road trip to cannibalize politicians" - Me

----

"I wasnt looking at your boobs because they're sexy, im staring at them because I'm a fucking idiot" - Me

----

"As a proud part of the gay." - Me

----

"Everybody's parents die at some point, you dont have to be so sad about it" -Me

----

"Are you having a boy or an abortion?"

----

"I wont make you touch Jeremy's vagina, Guy 7, you don't like those" -Me

(Jeremy is an airpod case. His vagina is the charging port. Guy 7 is gay)

----

"Save that for your discord boy" - Me

----

"if your nipples are purple, you're not a virgin" - Me

----

"I do not condone racism" -Guy 7

----

"I encourage realistic thinking, not positive, but realistic" - English teacher

----

"School is about doing things you don't like" -English teacher

----

"shit down" -English teacher

----

"Karate in the English room is a no" -Me

 ----

"He dance battled too hard, the cops went after him" -Guy 7

----

"I think, had he not insisted upon gyrating at people, the cops may not have been involved" -Me

----

"Note to self: the cops do not appreciate being thrust at or run from" -Me

----

"you cant have too many grandpas, don't get greedy, guy 7" -Me

---- 

"I hate this ruler..."(Darkly) "I have to snap it in half"

#jinx screams into the void #Quote books #Jinx exists in real life

[ofpd]

i decided to rewatch emo the musical and compile a list of my favorite quotes in it (these quotes include such amazing qualities as cringyness, iconicness, idiocy, etc)

will you be giving me your lunch money by cash or card

you have real, actual emos here?

it will occur to you that the deformity that jesus gave to you is your security against sex out of wedlock

i just read the bit where cain stabs abel and i'm about to get to the part where god drowns all the sodomites

i'm a science-addicted, sex-educated atheist

theyre only emos

sport is a tool for dictators and fascists

this song doesn't have a name, cause i'm not into labels

you're gonna impregnate everyone, men and women too

i once saw him kiss a man for 7 hours straight, while crying

okay wise guy, do you have any idea how much interest you're accruing? you're about to meet inflation head-on.

do you tongue kiss?

you've got wonderful legs, they're just what legs should be

when we talk it's completely understandable, when we touch it's completely consensual, nothing about our relationship is illegal

your manic depression could just be a bad day

if you're not feeling 100%, you should probably be on medication

back out now, or i'll go antichrist on you

stop bouncing that ball or i'll kill you and your parents

it would be suicide, and not the good kind

i didn't realize jesus had such a big peni—

i use the net for wikipedia and watch porn for the acting parts

how could i inflict you with my burgeoning perversion without putting my body through some physical exertion; you're safe with me

getting laid is probably too mainstream anyway

"do you tongue kiss?" "i'm 12"

no drugs, and no orgies before we play

[a bouncer asking people to see their wrists before entering a party says] scars?

hey, you're suicide guy!

do you think there might have been a chance [jesus] liked my chemical romance

he felt the pain of all mankind but emos do that all the time, was jesus an emo

no girl would've dated him because who wants their boyfriend crucified at the formal

"you have sinful thoughts too. who made jamali pregnant, isaac." "it was immaculate!"

we don't vote for conformists

i'd happily be castrated like alan turing thought he oughta

we're having a happy new financial year party

is it cool or gross to have sex with a 40-year-old

sally i'm sorry i'll stop sleeping with your friends if you forgive me

"isaac tested the chapel for fingerprints and dna" "he doesn't even believe in dna!!"

i felt depressed, and it felt amazing

#txt #emo the musical

[youofsomesong]

Friends Describing Starkid Characters (part 4)

(There will be spoiler pictures from Nerdy Prudes Must Die, so look at your own risk. They show up after Curt)

james

typical nerd

he has a letterman (i mean its in the photo)

this looks like the harry potter one (yup)

this information does not help me at all though (yes it does!!!)

gregory (front) and william (back) (noooooo)

they are in a relationship (oh 100%)

the gun in the underwear is for later tonight theyre spicing things up

(i have the better picture of peter, dont worry. but i wanna see if theyll realize its the same character)

montgomery

nerd but he knows your name, address, social security number, and credit card information and it not afraid to use it

megan

tired barista (SAME)

good at names and faces (not same) (same bestie)

knows martial arts

quincy francis iv

a cowboy with absolutely NO cowboy skills

saw a horse once and went “cow!!”

oh theyre also gay gay homosexual

nobody knows about their relationship though (well...)

elizabeth (left) and grace (right)

theyre into cosplay

businessman businessman businessman

slightly below average at his job but covers for it by being likeable and social (jfhkjasdhf thats not true)

his name is ronald

marco

theatre kid

rebecca

a proud trans woman who will take no shit

OH MY GOD WAIT

THATS UMBRIDGE ISNT IT (...maybe)

jafar (whats with my friends and thinking achmed is jafar???)

tried to sneak in an aladdin picture with the starkid. im onto you (youre not though cause thats achmed, not jafar)

bridget

likes reading

not very popular but a nice person

patricia

she has a pufferfish on her head

shes a strange one

still kind of popular though??

jasmine and jafar (this one im 87% certain) (youre half right bestie)

they pulled a switcheroo

that other one was aladdin and i was wrong (you were wrong but youre still wrong)

rachel

big fan of the little red riding hood story. made it her entire personality (jksdhfjdksh bestie)

thats a classic jack right there

total asshole (a bit, yeah)

sells drugs to minors (but he doesnt. he loves hannah like his own kid)

that previous guys brother but this ones a good person and keeps getting pulled into his brothers crap

his name is riley

definitely has pronouns

not straight (oh he 100% is not straight)

generally well liked but has one specific enemy (more like we love him but we hate him)

looks like a noah to me

self proclaimed “party animal” (everyone hates him except like one person whos pretty neutral about him) (lies. we all love him)

name is... liam (derogatory)

andrew garfield in disguise (askjfdhakjs)

thats all

“tall dark and handsome” (has platforms in his shoes)

daniel

NERDY PRUDES MUST DIE PHOTOS!!!! CONTINUE AT YOUR OWN RISK

thats a whole zombie fr fr

name was revoked

but his name WOULD have been zachary

watched “the last of us” and liked it way too much

became his favorite character

straight man (derogatory) (kajfhasdhf i dont believe max is straight AT ALL)

the woman is bi (grace is repressed bi, what did i tell yall?)

her name is haley his name is michael

he needs to put his shirt back on (no he does not. he is hot)

goshdarn jessica

Mean Girl ™️ (i mean...mariah was regina george...she was in mean girls...)

manny

generalized anxiety disorder (if he wasnt first labeled as obnoxious teen i would say yes. but he did have that whole waiting for hot chocolate line(s). oh and xe did not connect that the petes were the same character. i did not tell them that either and idk if i will tell him)

MARKIPLIER?

thats it

dyed hair and pronouns

quinn

at this point in time i did tell them that nibbly and blinky were not female even though both are played by women (and the fact that i hc nibbly as agender)

thats a rowan

absolutely slays

also has pronouns

liked wreck it ralph

naruto fanboy

his name is blake but he asked people to call him by the name of his favorite character

(nobody does)

this one is a big fan of sonic

has a sonic themed backpack and lunchbox

morgan

jeremiah

i see an anime shirt hes an anime stan (well thats obvious)

has at least two twitter accounts dedicated to anime (honestly wouldnt be surprised)

#starkid #team starkid #starkid black friday #black friday #a very potter sequel #A Very Potter Series #the guy who didnt like musicals #the trail to oregon #Firebringer #twisted #twisted the untold story of a royal vizier #spies are forever #nerdy prudes must die #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #npmd #npmd spoilers #tin can bros

[halloweenkills]

david sydney and fido don't live in a very big town and so all of them are subjects of the towns gossip both separately and together. which is hilarious for a group of vampires trying to keep their vampireness a seceret.

like davids rumors are relatively tame but they think it's weird he only holds his church services at night and theyre all pretty sure he's fucking the Town Goth (he is)

speaking of, sydneys the town goth. he rarely leaves his house and when he does he dresses exclusively in black and wears veils to cover his face. the towns children have a legend about him that he's actually a ghost that died 100 years ago and has been haunting the town ever since. (he's only been a vampire for 30 years)

and fidos just a well known drug dealer. who somehow ended up getting involved with the town goth and the horny priest and now they're all going Wild about it

#august.txt #oc tag