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keirawantstocry · 2 months

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poly morning crew but tubbo is insecure about his height and fitpac are trying to help him be less insecure about it :)

this got so incredibly off track i literally see one word and run with things swear down

hiii, um I kinda took this and ran with it? I will upfront say I am not a trans man but i am trans so i drew on my own personal experience to write this and dont mean to write anything… incorrect or anything of the sort <3 and if anyone reads this and i have accidently ending up portraying something incorrectly pls tell me immediately so i can rewrite

Most days Tubbo was fine with being trans. It was just part of who he was, like his brown hair or any of his birthmarks. Other days it bugged him. How much shorter he was compared to some of the other guys. How soft his body was. But he was fine. He wouldn't fucking talk to somebody about it, wasn't that big of a deal anyway. Nobody even noticed when he had his off days, Phil was focused on a thousand other things and the annoying voice of his husband in his head just prattled on and on about dumb shit before disappearing.

He was working out when it hit him. A wave of dysphoria so strong he physically bent over and closed his eyes. Mentally he swore. Horrible timing. Pac was supposed to be over in less than à few minutes and he could barely stand without seeing himself and feeling sick.

Speak of the devil, he thought as the doorbell rang and Pac's animated voice slid it's way through the house. “Tubboooo.”

Tubbo groaned but he had no choice. Laying down the weights he had been using, he headed over to the door to let Pac inside.

“Hey, Pac.” The man looked fucking gorgeous as per usual. It would sour Tubbo's mood if he wasn't so attracted to him. His infectious smile spread to Tubbo's face as they embraced. “It's good to see you, man.”

It was easy at first, hiding the nasty self hatred boiling in his gut. Unfortunately Pac was incredibly more attuned to his feelings then either Phil or Tommy. “What's wrong?” he asked as they sat down on the couch together.

“Nothing,” Tubbo blustered, avoiding his eyes.

“Tubbo,” he said in an uncharacteristic stern voice. It softened again as he gently took Tubbo's face in his hands and turned his head to look at him. “What's wrong, meu bem?”

With a long sigh, Tubbo accepted his fate. “I just feel like shit about myself today.”

Pac's head tilted in curiosity. “Why?”

“Honestly, I'm not sure what triggered it.”

“But what do you feel shit about?” Pac took a second to look around, trying to find his words, his warm hands still against his cheeks. “What about yourself?”

Tubbo laughed lightly, trying to shove down the churning in his stomach. “My body. I just wish… I wish I was born a guy.” Bile rose in his throat as he tried to choke down the shame. He hated being vulnerable especially with someone that he cared so much about. He met his eyes trying to gauge his reaction. The expression he was met with was one of pure confusion.

“I'm sorry I don't understand.”

“I'm trans," he said as bluntly as he could.

Pac just blinked at him slowly as if trying to comprehend the words coming out of his mouth. “That doesn't make you any less of a man.”

“Easy for you to say that,” Tubbo scoffed.

Unexpectedly Pac laughed as if it was one of the funniest things he had heard all day. “You do know I'm trans right?”

Tubbo stared at him as he felt his brain short circuit. “What? No, I didn't fucking know that what the fuck.” Surprised laughter was bubbling its way out of his chest before he could stop it. The shame was dissipating at the speed of light because here was one of the prettiest, most attractive men he’d ever known and he was just like him.

He laughed again before bringing his hands up to grab Pac’s face and kiss him firmly on the lips. Pac giggled into his mouth before kissing him back, sliding his hands into Tubbo’s hair. The kisses were sloppy, more shared laughter and wet open mouths than anything. But it felt so good, so right.

They finally stopped kissing and Tubbo realized that somehow they had ended up laying back on top of each other on the couch. “How did I not know you were trans?” he said, still in awe.

Pac laughed, light and airy. “You hate me and don’t pay attention to me.”

“Shut the fuck up.” Then for good measure he kissed him again to truly shut him up. Warmth had replaced the feeling in his gut and was now spreading through his entire body. For the first time he felt good about it; not bad, not neutral but good.

#qsmp #my writing #fanfiction #q!tubbo #q!pac #pacbo #TRANS TUBBO AGENDA #everyone is trans in my mind #so hey if someone wants to see a part two with fit telling tubbo that hes also trans then i meannnn

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tubbo-photos · 1 month

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Day 59 of Tubbo

#HAPPY TRANS VISIBILITY DAY !!!!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉#tubbo #tubbo mcyt #tubbolive

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yb-cringe · 2 months

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brother ive made these cubitos transgender in ways you'll never understand

#i was like surely i dont have that many. then i started like making a list #some of them are just osmosis #if we're mutuals and youre heavy on the trans cubito propaganda then im already there with you #except for making qsmp tubbo trans ill be honest transmasc tubbo doesnt appeal to me

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s1llycilantro · 10 months

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dsmp art??? in 2023v?.?.?? FUCK you it's MY special interest and ill DRAW IT WHENEVER I WANT

#this is me oc-ifying these three anyways #tubbo is heavily inspired by worms for brains becajse theyre so cool and i eat sleep love their art #dsmp #dsmp art #ctommy #ctubbo #clingyduo #benchtrio #the brainworms infested me last night #all i could think about was dsmp and jojos bizzarre adventure #slams fist on desk #im so tired of dying dead this is a terrible fate i HATW THIS!!#oh #cranboo #i surporse #ctommy art #also he's trans #if u didn't catch that #fool

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bundleofstyx · 1 year

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i lost interest in the dsmp towards mid 2022, but i tuned in to the finale anyway. and,,.,. wow. actually having a proper sendoff like that. uhhhgf got damn emotional.

and itd be a damn shame not to give it a final goodbye in art. getting into dsmp was also when i started taking my art more seriously and ouggfhgd. its nice to see how much ive improved

farewell, you awful, terrible, shit minecraft server!

#art #digital art #illustration #digital illustration #digital artwork #dsmp #dreamsmp #mcyt #queer artist #trans artist #fanart #tommyinnit #tubbo #clingy duo #ibispaint

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transbeeduo · 5 months

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Ctubbo is a fat hairy bear and he is so hot (canon fact)

SOOOOO FUCKING TRUE FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!

#trans bear c!tubbo the WORLD #mutuas <3 #terezicaptor

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chrysalizzm · 2 years

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osmp ranboo momence 🏳️‍⚧️

+ a gag based on dsmp ranboo not knowing what pronouns were (hc that endermen are sexless as a species and gender is largely a social performance adapted from humankind)

#osmp #origins smp #origins smp fanart #osmp ranboo #osmp ranboo fanart #osmp tubbo #osmp tubbo fanart #osmp tommy #osmp tommy fanart #osmp niki #osmp niki fanart #comic #chrys draws #me when trans

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phatcatphergus · 2 months

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I think that we should let production write the lies even if they aren’t super accurate to the person. I think it would be really funny if they gave Tina the Average Harry swimming trunks story

#because then everyone has to figure out if she’s lying or coming out at trans #anyway #liar liar #tubathon day 16 #tubathon #tubbo liveblogging

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peninkwrites · 6 months

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Before: Tubbo's First Friend

Tubbo heard there was a child in his basement, how exciting!

[CW: hostage situations, child endangerment, implied neglect]

The Mafia AU

crossposted to ao3

This wasn’t the first time his father had brought home a hostage, but it was the first time it was someone around Tubbo’s age. Tubbo had snuck down the hall, looking over the railing curiously as a small figure––bigger than him, but still small––was all but carried inside and back through the house to the cellar, head covered by a hood, and arms pinned back. It wasn’t just any kid, as Tubbo had heard through his occasional eavesdropping, it was the Police Captain’s kid. Tubbo, not out of any personal experience, rather word of mouth, had heard that the Police Captain was an “annoying bitch” who “didn’t know how to stay out of the way.” Somehow, taking her kid was meant to fix that. Tubbo was nine years old, and he thought he grasped the family business relatively well, but he thought taking away her kid would probably be an annoyance at best. He knows if he disappeared, when his father eventually noticed, he’d probably be pissed off, but that wouldn’t stop him from acting as he did, but his father was good at his business, apparently, so maybe it did something.

Tubbo lurked for the first few days of their new guest in the basement. This one was a hostage, so, thus far no gunshots or screaming, just a rather eerie quiet from downstairs. Tubbo only asked about the kid once and had gotten very lucky, all things considered. Not a question directly towards his father––god forbid––but he happened to be in the kitchen when one of the lackeys came in to go downstairs and feed their captive. Tubbo had, when it came down to it, despite having lurked in the kitchen deliberately, panicked and instead of asking anything that might have made sense, he’d asked the man, “do they seem nice?”

The man seemed startled by Tubbo being there at all, let alone speaking, so instead of a more expected scolding, the guy just went, “what?”

“The Captain’s kid. Are they nice? How old are they? Are they my age? I’m nine, by the way.”

Silence, Tubbo shifting nervously, and the man staring at him like he was a particularly yippy dog. “Uh. Quiet. The kid is fuckin’ quiet. Obviously,” the man says dryly. He glances back to the cellar door, which he had been about to unlock behind him, before he reconsiders. “D’you wanna..?” He nods from the kitchen to the cellar.

“Can I?” Tubbo asks eagerly.

The man still looks quite uncomfortable. He doesn’t seem to know that the Boss’s kid doesn’t get any respect, and if he wanted he could just tell him to fuck off, and isn’t sure if he’s supposed to treat Tubbo like a dangerous little mob prince or not. “I dunno, I don’t see why not…” He says sheepishly. “Just, get some shit together, whatever kids eat, I dunno, guess you’d know, huh? And I’ll be up here to lock up after. Don’t– Don’t stay down there too long, though, okay?” He said warningly.

Tubbo was already flitting around the kitchen like an excitable, jittery moth. He pauses only once, looking briefly worried. “Are they allergic to peanut butter?”

“Do you think I fuckin’ asked?”

Tubbo considers this gravely. He thinks he read somewhere that peanut allergies were alarmingly common and quite fatal. “I’ll assume yes just to be safe,” he nods astutely, like this man is at all invested.

“Yeah… yeah, you do that…” the man sighs, leaning against the cabinets.

Tubbo has a wooden tray, because he might as well do his best on the presentation, he has a feeling he’ll only be able to do this once, and he places a glass of water beside a juice box––one for hydration, one for leisure––and he’s arranged a pile of goldfish and chicken nuggets on the plate with the utmost care. He is careful with his last additions, debating between condiments, before deciding to bring along ketchup, as that’s what he tended to use, before, with an unusual joy in actually being able to share with someone, he added a coveted pudding cup to the tray. The man had watched this display in wry amusement.

“What, you’re not gonna put a flower on it for your girlfriend?” He said dryly.

Rather than embarrassed, Tubbo took this critique thoughtfully. “Should I?”

The man sighed, his wit apparently unappreciated, and unlocked the cellar. “Again, it’s not a fucking playdate, so don’t take too long.”

“You got it, sir!” Tubbo said brightly, descending into the darkened cellar with only mild apprehension.

A single bare bulb lit the room, it was otherwise sparsely furnished. A mattress on the floor with a blanket on top of it, but otherwise, Tubbo noted, there wasn’t much to do down here. He wishes he’d thought to bring down a puzzle or something, but it’s too late for that now.

“Hey, you’re not the usual guy!” The Captain’s kid is quite chipper for a hostage, sitting on the edge of the mattress, chin resting on their palm.

“N-No! No, I’m not,” Tubbo hoped his excitement wasn’t too obvious. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen another kid, let alone spoken with them. “Hello! It’s– it is nice to meet you, I am Tubbo Underscore, but you can just call me Tubbo, obviously, and I– I’ve brought you food!” He holds out the tray. “And– And water. Um. Obviously…”

“Cool, concierge, could you, like, bring it here? I think you’re just outta my range,” the kid waved, and Tubbo recognized the chain around their wrist, it at least padded with some cloth between the metal and their skin.

Tubbo nodded sharply, quick to come closer. The kid was much tanner than he was, which made sense, considering their entombment had only been a matter of days now, and Tubbo did not go outside much, and they were also clearly older than Tubbo. “What’s– What’s a concierge?” Tubbo asked with something like awe.

The Captain’s kid considered this thoughtfully. “Um. I don’t actually know! Like, a waiter or something? I dunno.” A shrug. “Dude! You got me chicken nuggets?! This is way better than the crap they’ve been feeding me so far!”

“Yeah! I’m nine years old––ten in December!––how old are you?” Tubbo wanted to sit next to them, but he held back, sitting on the ground across from them instead, all warning of not taking too long having left his mind.

“Whoa! What is this, 20 questions? I can’t be giving info to the enemy,” they said, cracking open the juice box. “I am… older than you, though,” they seemed to think that was important to clarify. “By a few years, alright?”

“Right, right, and what’s your name?” Tubbo asked eagerly.

“Now that is an interesting question, Tubbo Underscore,” they say his name a tad mockingly, but Tubbo doesn’t notice. “Because, see, I’ve been down here forever now, and it’s given me a lot of time to think.”

“It has?”

“Yeah! It has! About, y’know, life and stuff, and you know what, Tubbo Underscore? I’ve figured some stuff out. I think I might be a dude.”

“Ye–Yeah?” Tubbo asks, puzzled.

“Yep! A total dude. Big ol’ mano-a-mano, manly man, right here!” The kid flexes, arms not all that impressive. “Well, okay, not yet, but I’ll get there, anyway, I think I’m all dude-ified now.”

“Cool. I– I didn’t know you could do that, to be honest,” Tubbo says, intrigued.

“So, the ‘nouns I got all sorted out, the basic kit will do, the he’s and the him’s, and the his’s, all that good stuff,” he pauses for a mouthful of goldfish, “still a bit caught up on the– the nomenclature–”

“What’s gnome-men-clay-sure?”

The Captain’s kid considers this thoughtfully. “I am not sure, actually. Something to do with names, that’s the point, basically, dunno what name to go with––Actually!” He cuts himself off, distracted, it makes Tubbo jump. “Other issue, side-issue to the name thing, my one issue, my one hangup on gettin’ dude-ified, is,” he shakes out his hair, long and dark. “Long hair! Long hair is rad! So, there’s a debate goin’ on up here,” he knocks on the side of his skull. “About how I’m gonna be dude-ified if I like my longer hair,” he rubs his hands together, leaning forward conspiratorially, Tubbo leaning in to listen. “I’m pretty sure… I’m pretty sure guys can have long hair,” he nods, as if revealing some great wisdom.

“Yeah, yeah probably, I mean, if you don’t cut it, it gets long,” Tubbo tries to contribute, thinking only of literal biological matters and not the social matters the Captain’s kid seems caught up with.

“Exactly!” The kid laughs again. “And like, that’s cool now, isn’t it? That’s what all the hippies are doing, right?”

Finally, a topic Tubbo has something to say on, he adds excitedly: “My dad says hippies are useless bums with no self respect! So, yeah! They’re probably cool.”

“Sweet,” the kid nods. “Very cool.” He eats another mouthful of crackers. “‘fish?” He offers the plate to Tubbo.

“No, thank you, all yours, man,” Tubbo declines, more intrigued by the conversation. “I didn’t realize you could change it. You know, I’ve never put much thought into being a girl. I haven’t really been around many girls, though, or, any girls, so I guess I wouldn’t know.”

“Yeah, fair enough,” the kid shrugs, crushing the juice box and tossing it across the room as one would a beer can, before eyeing the pudding cup next.

“I dunno. As of, I’m quite happy being a boy, so.”

“My thoughts exactly! Being a guy rules. Like, I’m sure being a chick rules too, but I just don’t feel it, y’know?” He ignores the spoon Tubbo had brought so nicely and takes a swig of the pudding as if drinking a thick beverage.

“Yeah, I guess me neither.”

“So, dunno what I’m gonna do with names––thanks for your help, though, Tubbo, that hair conundrum was bugging me a bit, glad we settled on something––but I dunno about names. I kinda want it to be something silly, something fun, y’know?”

“Oh, that’s nice!”

“Yeah, so, when I’m a big strong dude, people will still underestimate me, so I can still take ‘em by surprise when I, I dunno, stab ‘em or whatever.”

“Oh.” Not what Tubbo was expecting.

The hostage squints across the room, contemplating something, clearly enjoying having an audience after days of isolation, “what’s the opposite of bright?”

“Um, dim?”

“Hm, close, but no cigar. What’s, like, sorta like dim, but not the opposite of bright?”

Tubbo has quite the repertoire of such language. “Oh! I know! Stupid, slow, dumb, idiotic, r–”

“Nah, close! We’re really close, but no cigar!” He nods thoughtfully, pausing for a goldfish.

“Yeah, what’s that mean, too? No cigar? I mean, my dad smokes cigars sometimes, but it doesn’t make sense in what you’re saying.”

The hostage exhales air from his cheeks. “No idea!”

Tubbo laughs. “I don’t think I’ve met anybody that talks like you do.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Tubbo shrugs. “I dunno. I think you’re… you’re pretty cool.”

“You’re goddamn right I’m cool!” He takes it all in stride, pointing at Tubbo approvingly, the chain around his wrist rattling as he does so. He takes another swig of the pudding, it creating a chocolate mustache on his lip.

“Why do you have a chain on your wrist? Most hostages don’t need that,” Tubbo asked. “Not the littler ones, anyway.”

“Uh, ‘cause I bit ‘im,” he says around a mouthful of pudding.

“You– You bit who?” Tubbo’s eyes widened, because there’s no way in hell he meant Schlatt.

“Dunno, some guy.” Another halfhearted shrug. “I’m a– I’m a fuckin’ shark, Tubbo! Smell blood in the water, and I just gotta–” the kid bites down on nothing, as if to demonstrate, before delving back into the pudding cup.

“Cool,” Tubbo says breathlessly.

The kid nods, basking in the praise. “My mom gives me shit for it. Oh, you’re gonna get in trouble if you get in fights all the time, oh, your teachers called again, what do you mean you held that boy’s head underwater?” A high laugh that was honestly far funnier to Tubbo than what the kid had actually said. “And, well, I mean, she was kinda right, I did end up in trouble for it. Word of advice to you, kid, kicking a dude in the balls is not a catch all answer to your problems, especially if it’s a grown-ass man. And, also, this shoulda been obvious, but forgive me, I’m young, definitely do not tell them your mom is the Police Captain and she’ll arrest them all if they mess with you. That gets you thrown in a trunk, and that is no bueno,” he nods sagely.

“Right, no bueno,” Tubbo pretends to understand what that means.

“It’ll be kinda cool now, though, instead they’ll call her and be like Captain, your son has gotten into trouble again, and she’ll be all like of course, my son is a real rascal! I should’ve been a better father!”

“Father?” Tubbo giggles.

“Yeah! Yeah, ‘cause it’s all switched around!”

“I don’t think that’s how that works, bossman–”

“Kid, what the fuck?” An exasperated voice calls down the stairs. “I said it wasn’t a playdate, what do you think you’re doing?”

“Sorry! Sorry, I’m coming now!” Tubbo still wavers, staring almost longingly at the boy across from him. “It was– It was really nice to meet you Mr– Whatever your name is gonna end up being? Yeah! So, um, bye!”

Tubbo was halfway up the stairs, an ache in his chest, when he hears one last word from downstairs.

“Foolish!” Followed by a high cackle of delight.

“Foolish…” Tubbo murmurs the name. He doesn’t know what to do with the fact that he feels happy and sad at the exact same time. “I think I made a friend,” he tells the man brightly at the top of the stairs.

“That’s… that’s great kid,” the man says dryly. “Hope your little buddy doesn’t get shot, I guess.”

#TRANS FOOLISH BABEYYYY #mafia au #my writing #dsmp fanfic #ngl i came up with the title and cried a little lmao #c!Tubbo #Tubbo #c!foolish #foolish

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tjodity · 11 months

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Dream SMP Transition Headcanons!

Transfem!Tommyinnit- Tommy wasn't big on having very long hair, but instead wears it neck length and occasionally uses bonnets! She didn't feel like she could handle surgery and never felt the need to anyways. She swabs a small amount of swiftness potion combined with honey on her throat every so often, which raises the pitch of her voice! Tommy also ends up stitching most of her damaged clothes into skirts or bonnets!

Transfem!Niki- She does potion swabs like Tommy, but also got magic top surgery on the Perfect SMP, which, unlike the real world, involves curse of binding tattoos, regeneration potions, and a donor. She started dying her hair due to the surplus of dyes in L'Manberg and it gave her so much gender euphoria she almost started crying so she dyes it a new color every few months! She is unbothered by typically masculine clothing but enjoys parties and events where she doesn't have to worry about work/combat and can dress up :D

Transmasc!Fundy- Due to travelling a lot to more globally connected places opposed to small kingdoms and SMPs like other characters, Fundy got actual top surgery. After he got to the Dream SMP Wilbur made Tommy help him figure out how to make testosterone in a drug lab with medieval herbs. After Fundy is on his own he picks up smoking partially because of Schlatt and partially because of how it makes his voice sound :(. He always wears very baggy clothes and a trenchcoat and keeps his hair short.

Transmasc!Tubbo- Tubbo was fairly content for his early time on the SMP, as Tommy was the only one who knew him before he transitioned and was very supportive. After the Schlatt administration Tubbo's dysphoria increased. He also got magical top surgery, though this required finding a totem of undying, hand tattooing the curse of vanishing around his chest, stock piling on healing potions, and having a friend he trusted not to kill him (literally only Tommy at that point lol). Tommy also sewed shoulder pads and packers into his presidential suit :')

Transmasc!Badboyhalo- Gender is a fairly unimportant concept in the Nether, mostly due to it being an idea brought in by Overworld traders. Due to Bad's raising and rank he was never particularly affected by it, and quite literally had Skeppy pick his gender for him. He never felt the need for any kind of bodily change and can alter his voice at will via demonic magic! He also does not pick clothing based around gender presentation, just whatever he thinks looks best!

Nonbinary!Ranboo- Any concept the ancient people may have had when they fled to the end was gone by the time Ranboo came into existence. With no concrete memories of his past and living in a primarily Overworlder society, Ranboo defaults to using he/him as it's what they're referred to as most often. In their Enderwalk state they are not referred to often enough to consider it. It's only after Ghostboo forms with all of their memories that it is brought up in conversation, and they are referred to as such on their tombstone.

P.S.-whoops didnt mean to make that sad! might make a part two at some point or a proper explanation of Minecraft Transition Surgery (TM)

#dream smp #dsmp #tommyinnit #c!tommyinnit #c!tommy #tubbo #c!tubbo #trans tommyinnit #ranboo #c!ranboo #transinnit #fundy #c!fundy

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imhereformysciencefriends · 6 months

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@mcyt-yuri-week Day 4: Transgender & Genderbend!

Trans!Puffy x genderbent!Techno. Read on AO3 here

It was almost nearing funny, how when people learned that one of them was trans, they always assumed it was Technoblade. She was a towering pig hybrid, with heavy tusks and a square jaw, thick muscular arms and heavy hooves, and Puffy was half her height and width. So Puffy got where the mixup came from! Really she did. Just that it was funny.

Less funny was the occasional asshole who decided to make a remark, but Techno usually just killed those assholes for saying shit to her and then got really stuffy and blushy and stiff while she pretended not to hover around Puffy. It wasn’t even like Puffy got all that bothered! But it was nice to be fussed over, even when Techno had been the recipient of the comment.

This was particularly hilarious given the fact that Techno couldn’t even ask for her own pickles. It was always Puffy approaching the service workers, reminding them of details. She was pretty sure at this point that Techno would rather auto-cannibalize herself all the way to death than inconvenience a customer service employee even one (1) time.

“Excuse me!” Puffy called, flagging down a grocery store employee while her girlfriend pretended not to know her. “Did you guys move the hoof polish?” Normally it was in with the shampoos and soaps, but Puffy and Techno had crawled the bodywash aisle twice now to no avail.

“Oh, yeah, it got put, uh,” the faun in a blue polo fumbled, glancing around and trying to remember. “I think cosmetics?”

“Well that’s a dumb place to put that,” Puffy muttered, hands on her hips. Techno looked panicked at her rudeness. “Thanks! We’ll check there.”

Hoof polish acquired, they checked out their items and took to the streets of Essempi. It was a pleasant day out, not quite hot but only cool enough to justify maybe a shawl or light jacket. Techno had a beige and red dress made from a thick cotton weave, and a blood red shawl that lifted slightly in the light breeze. Really, if she had the stomach for it she could’ve been a model. Puffy did not even pretend she wasn’t ogling her.

She heard the two unruly teens just before she felt them, Tubbo rushing past her right before Tommy knocked into her. As far as pickpocketing techniques went, it was seamless. She had no idea what he’d grabbed and where he’d grabbed it from. Unfortunately for them, everyone and their cow knew that Tommy liked to nick things recreationally.

Techno was in front of them, glowering, all towering height and broad muscle and thick chest Puffy took frequent delight in, stanced to block the road and red eyes glaring.

“Hey-heyyyyyy, big woman,” Tommy greeted, nerves clear in his voice. Puffy huffed and stormed up, smacking him on the back of the head.

“Give it back!” she ordered.

“Give what back?” Tubbo asked, and it really was dangerous how completely innocent he managed to make himself look and sound.

“Whatever you two took, now give it,” Puffy demanded, holding out her hand.

Behind the pair, Techno snorted. A piggish rush of air that had most sensible people’s skin crawling.

“Fine, fine,” Tommy handed over the slab of beef wrapped up in its brown paper, and Puffy had no idea how he’d managed to snag that. It’d been near the bottom of its bag!

“Good,” Techno said darkly, “now get.”

The teens tore off, spirits hardly dampened. They weren’t a bad sort, just unruly, and Tommy liked the act of taking more than he’d ever cared for keeping, anyway. As far as anyone could tell, Tubbo just liked trouble.

“My gallant knight in shining armor,” Puffy teased, giggling as she tugged Techno’s hand out of her crossed arms so she could wrap her arms around Techno’s. She was so big and strong (a fact that Puffy made frequent and gleeful use of). “Chasing off the riffraff for me.”

“Cringe,” Techno snorted. “Last time I checked, you’re the biggest riffraff on this side of the ocean.”

“And the other!” Puffy tugged on Techno’s arm, but all it really did was leverage herself closer. She stumbled a little, then got her footing again. Man, Puffy’s hooves were half the size of her girlfriend’s. “May I remind you, I had a lucrative and mischievous career well before I sailed to these shores.”

“You’re not really provin’ me wrong here.”

Puffy snorted, loud and nasally, and knocked her horns against Techno’s bicep (stupid sexy towering giant. Puffy’d knock her head if she could reach it).

Puffy dragged her home with her and made Techno sit while she cooked them both dinner. Techno put up a token protest when Puffy requested that she tell her a story from one of the old myths she was so obsessed with, and Puffy fell happily into the rhythm of cooking while her girlfriend lovingly detailed the story of an archer with a stinky wound.

“I think I wound up cooking too much beef,” Puffy observed as she brought the food over to the table, Techno joining her with a swish of her skirts.

“Eh, pack it up and bring it with us to my place,” she said with a shrug. “Take it to the bedroom. We can have night meats later.”

Puffy dropped her fork before she’d even had her first bite. “Night meats?!”

Techno froze, in that way she did when she thought she’d said something weird and was now analyzing how to best play it off. But Puffy absolutely could not stand for that.

“I need to kiss you until you’re stupid,” Puffy followed, her heart suddenly squeezed far too full as she admired the utterly ridiculous woman across from her. And all but crawled across the table in order to plant herself directly in her lap, kissing around her short tusks with practiced familiarity.

“What, no, but I’m already so dumb!” Techno protested, her hands going up to Puffy’s hip and waist since she was resisting this soooooo hard.

“Then I’ve just got to make you stupider!!!”

“Heh?!? There won’t be anything left!”

Techno laughed as Puffy continued to kiss her, their dinners cooling on the table behind them as Puffy stuck her tongue down her girlfriend’s throat. She was so ridiculous. She was so ridiculous and silly and goofy and Puffy needed to marry her. She was so dense and strong, too, Puffy also needed to climb her like a tree and rock her whole ass world.

“I love you,” she gasped when they parted, stars still gleaming in her eyes and little hands tangled in long pink hair. “You’re so ridiculous. Night meats?! I love it, I love you, that’s inspired, why didn’t I ever think of that.”

“I think you’re blowin’ this a lil’ out of proportion,” Techno muttered, self-conscious and glancing askance. Puffy kissed her again about it.

16 notes · View notes