#willing suicide

[theblackphoneislife]

You're here..? (Part two!)

This is part two to my very first post! "You're here..?"

please read the first part before reading this part (the story wont make sense for storyline reasons) and please check the TW's!!!!! On the first part or the tags at the bottom of this post!!

"Wait.." Robin backs up, wiping his teary eyes and looking up at Vance with a small smile, almost mischievous the way he looks into Vance's eyes like he has a plan.

"You're dead, right?" There's an idea in Robin's head, and it makes him smile and turn around to his nightstand, starting to dig through it.

"Yeah..." Vance said with a nod, not really sure why that was a question. "...I'm dead."

He'd shift up from where he sat, watching his friend dig through his nightstand. "What exactly are you doing, Ro?"

"Well..." Robin starts, shaking his head and opening another drawer. "Since you're dead... if I... was… if I was dead. Then.. technically.. we could be together again."

He keeps looking through his drawers, trying to find something, his movements almost desperate.

Vance stiffens at the mention, the possibility that they could become something after he died if Robin followed through."R-Robin... Don't do something stupid." He said, trying to hide the urgency in his voice.

"I'm here now, there's no need for you to... to throw your living life away for me."

He could be a ghost, but Robin was real. Real and alive, his living life still in front of him, and Vance was scared of messing that up for him.

"Vance. A life without you is not a life worth living." Bennett says, his voice rough, he's holding back tears.He keeps searching desperately in his drawers before making his way to his closet and pulling at the floorboards, eventually finding one that popped out with ease.

"...Robin-" Vance started, but he fell short of saying anything else.

He couldn't stop his friend from giving up his future life and becoming something like him.

It's something he'd dreamed of back then, being able to see Robin again...but not by making him give up everything.Vance only nodded his head, moving closer to Robin with as much caution as he could before kissing him on the forehead. "Fine...I still love you, regardless."

Robin stops searching, wrapping his arms around Vance's neck and pulling him down onto the ground next to him.

"You wanna spend my final moments with me?" His voice was a little shaky. He was scared, but he wanted to do this.

Needed to do this.

Vance was worried, but he could see how his friend desperately wanted to be with him after death, and he wasn’t about to break his heart.

“Always.” Vance whispered, leaning closer to the boy as he ran a through the boy’s hair.

“...I’ve always loved you.”Robin takes a deep breath.

"I've always loved you too, Vance." He smiles, enjoying Vance's fingers in his hair before he turns back to the closet, bending down to grab a knife and two bottles of pain Killers.

"You ready, Vance?”

“As ready as I'll ever be.” Vance sighed quietly, pulling Robin in for a very gently kiss, their first kiss, before they move onto what happens in the afterlife. They know its not going to be easy, but at least they have each other.

#robin x vance #robin arellano #vance hopper #cw: gore #death tw #willing suicide #Suicidal! Alive! Robin #Dead! Vance

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: sacrifice / self sacrifice / slight suicidal themes / death mention / ]

I personally think that Leo took the wrong lessons from the movie. I definitely think he grew to understand the importance of teamwork and making sure he takes others into account so as to not harm them by proxy of whatever scheme he has cooked up, however based on the ending events I’m not quite certain he fully grasped two things.

The first thing is communication. Oh, he can communicate, and he does, when he deems it necessary. When he’s setting up a plan prior to the action. But this is where the second thing comes in.

The second thing I don’t think Leo truly grasped is “it’s not about you.” It’s so unbearably easy to take that the wrong way, especially when taking the rest of the series into account.

What I believe Leo took from this message is not “it’s not just you, everyone matters and can contribute, can help and be helped” but “put the whole of everyone above yourself” which can both be a good lesson…and a fatal one.

And it is fatal, we see as much in the movie.

Even after the big hope speech, when Leo is “fighting” Krang!Raph, he takes a huge risk. Sure, it worked, and Leo managed to get through to Raph through a well deserved apology, but it could have so easily ended in his death and yet he barely even hesitates to go for it.

And then again, to the big scene at the end, where Leo sacrifices himself not only for the sake of his family, but for the whole world.

To him, that’s the message to take from this. That the lives of everyone, of the greater good, matters…more than him. That the risk to himself is worth it if others can be saved.

Leo learned that gambling with his life as the betting chip is always the best move to make in the end.

And to make matters worse…this thinking is what works.

These risks are ultimately what is needed to save the day, so why would Leo look away from it now? Clearly it’s the right move and everything worked out!

Thing is, Leo did grow from the events of the movie. He learned to take things more seriously and be more mature, he learned to value his team’s input and capabilities enough to rely on them more, and he learned to be less self-centered and realize the turmoil others were going through (especially if that turmoil is a result of his actions.)

But still, he’s grown to accept the gamble of his life as a viable answer to their problems.

Personally, with how Leo has been shown to toy around with the idea of “it’s better me than them” I think this goes beyond sacrifice in the name of love or even sacrifice in the name of responsibility, and pushes over into sacrifice in the name of worth.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rottmnt headcanons #rise leo #death mention / #sacrifice / #self sacrifice / #suicidal tendencies implication / #I honestly could go on for hours but this is all a kinda messy ramble rn #but yeah like…I genuinely can’t see how Leo doesn’t take the wrong message from this all #sure he gets a lot of good growth but #he’s a gambler at heart #it’s just now he’s only willing to bet *himself* #ONCE AGAIN- #‘I’m nothing without them’ and ‘it’s not about you’ can and do mix into quite the dangerous cocktail huh #thing that gets me here too is that a lot of what Leo has to learn in the movie is things he already showed moments of knowing in the show #like Leo KNOWS what his family is capable of and can rely on them if necessary #the problem is when it’s necessary #and he grew to understand that it’s actually ALWAYS necessary…except at the very end #leo is also often the voice of reason throughout the series…but he also often folds and just goes with the flow #he’s goofy like that lol #and tbh he likes to RELAX #that’s a pretty subtle but pretty substantial part of his character #imo at the beginning of the movie Leo KNOWS he’s being immature and THATS THE POINT #they’re still kids man #they’re all just kids #but yeah #I keep rambling and rambling but Leo really is such a tragic character in the grand scheme of things #he’s so utterly fascinating to look at because of how many layers and complexities he has but I just want to give him a hug and let him rest

[radlymona]

TRAs having no empathy yet again

Teenagers who are pushed towards transitioning aren’t “pushovers” they’re mentally and emotionally vulnerable young people who shouldn’t be allowed to make life-changing medical decisions. Acknowledging this fact isn’t stopping adults from transitioning. It just aims to stops other vulnerable teenagers from doing the same.

#love how they quote peer pressured because deep down even though know they’re speaking with an incorrect euphemism #being told you’re at risk of suicide if you don’t transition is not peer pressure ffs #they hate their own community so so much #gender critical #also I’ve known very mentally ill people in the early 20s who have also transitioned #out of acknowledged internalised homophobia #one of them especially is having several mental breakdowns per year and is still allowed to transition #going into a shitload debt as he does so #they’re always willing to acknowledge how the medical industry preys upon vulnerable people except when it comes to comes to gender ID #then the medical industry can do no wrong

[theatre-apocalypse]

#starkid #hatchetfield #tgwdlm #the guy who didn't like musicals #paul matthews #suicidal ideation tw #emeto tw #ask to tag #rattling the bars of my cage. paul choosing his own oblivion rather than the Hive’s is one of the #scenes of all time like he’s trying so hard to cling to his own autonomy #and he suceeds in keeping his will his own. He wins a contest of wills against a GOD #does it make a difference in the end? no. but it mattered #screaming crying etc

[bet-on-me-13]

Jazz joins the Suicide Squad to save Danny

So! Danny got caught by the GIW. And it was Public too.

Jazz can see absolutely no way to save Danny. The GIW Base is heavily fortified, she has no help aside from Tucker and Sam, and public opinion is against Ghosts, so nobody would want to help her protest his Capture. Maybe a few teenagers from the high school, but absolutely none of the adults would help.

So she does the one thing she can. She contacts Amanda Waller.

Waller had previously approached her Parents about buying some of their tech off them, for her "Specializes Task Force" to use in case they ever came up against a Ghost.

From the short interaction Jazz had with Waller, she knew one thing.

That Woman would do ANYTHING, to protect the Government she worked for.

All Jazz needed to do, was offer her something that outweighed the value of capturing Danny. Information. The Infinite Realms, the True Biology of Ghosts, the Psychology of Ghosts, the Power Structure of the Realms, and so much more. Waller needed to know everything she could about the Realms to feel secure, to feel like her Country was safe. She needed Information.

And Jazz had that in spades.

As the daughter of the Leaders on Ectology, and a friend to multiple Saptient Ghosts, including the Kings and Queens of various Realms, she was uniquely qualified to provide all this information.

And Waller was impressed. But she still felt like she needed a little more, and seeing as Jazz was a highly trained Martial Artist due to her Mom, and had been taught enough about mechanical engineering by her Dad to constitute a Major in in, she saw potential.

She saw a Pawn. Perfect for placement on Task Force X. Her Suicide Squad had been missing an extra member recently, and Jazz was the perfect fit.

So they made a Deal.

Danny Fenton, also known as The Phantom, would he released from Government Detainment, alongside any other Sentient/Sapient Ghost in their possession. They would he protected from further Detainment until further Notice, and the Town of Amity Park would be left alone by the GIW Indefinitely.

In return, Jazzmine Fenton would be hired on as Amanda Wallers On-Call Consultant for anything related to Ghosts and the Realms. Additionally, she would be employed as a Part Time Member of Task Force X, answering the call of Duty whenever is is directed as her, No Questions Asked. (Or the deal would be null and void)

But she would Endure it. Because she and Waller had one thing in common.

She would do Anything, to protect her little brother.

#Dpxdc #Dp x dc #Dcxdp #Dc x dp #Danny Phantom #Dc #Dcu #Jazz Fenton joins the Suicide Squad #Jazz joins the Suicide Squad #Unlike the others she does it completely willingly for the sake of her little brother #Waller saw an opportunity #Jazz was able to figure out how to contact her and was able to manipulate her way into extracting a deal that would protect her brother #And her Town from the GIW in a Legal Manner #All from a single 5 second long interaction they had had over a year ago #She had potential #Jazz is willing to do anything to protect her brother #(Waller also sweetened the deal by offering to fund her College Classes) #Jazz is mostly free from the Suicide Squad #But if she is called in she WILL come in #No Questions Asked

[comradekatara]

Can you go a bit more in depth about your post about Sokka in the Burning Rock episode? You said that it was basically his suicide mission, which I agree with. I'd really like to hear more of your thoughts on it.

okay yeah i mean i'm sure i've covered all these points before extensively because i love weaving a tapestry of sokka's fucked up psychological landscape more than anything in the world, but every so often someone will comment on one of my posts and be like "i think you're reaching i think sokka is the paragon of mental health actually" and i'm just like um. did we not all watch the boiling rock. did we just ignore the apotheosis of sokka's entire character arc. like katara's apotheosis in "the southern raiders" is both very overt and impactful and also, arguably, subtler than sokka's, because they don't explicitly spell out the themes every five seconds, but like. if you didn't watch the boiling rock then you cannot understand sokka. and weirdly enough i also believe that zuka shippers are the biggest culprit of this despite this episode being thee zucchini episode because they somehow still have the audacity to characterize sokka as "goofy sunshine who exists to comfort zuko" when like. the entire point is that sokka is legitimately suicidal here and zuko is doing everything in his power to support him thru what is quite literally a mental breakdown. like their relationship is legitimately interesting i don't understand how people have taken that and made it deeply boring.....but i digress.

the boiling rock is quite obviously sokka at his lowest. the worst thing that could ever happen to him – fumbling a mission that was squarely his responsibility, from its conception to its execution, due to not being able to sufficiently compartmentalize his emotions, leading to the mass imprisonment of most of his comrades, including the men of his tribe whom he idolized his entire life and felt immense pressure to live up to, including his father who he is deathly afraid of disappointing (for reasons that have nothing to hakoda being malicious or neglectful in any way, fwiw), and thus being directly implicated in the failure and the harm caused by said failure – happened. sokka is someone who is especially bad at dealing with failure, because a) he is exceptionally talented, and thus has less experience dealing with failure in both minor and major ways, and thus lacks the emotional resilience developed through the process of struggle and growth that normal people (such as, incidentally, zuko) go through and b) to sokka, whose primary desire at all times is to protect and provide for others in any way he possibly can, for someone else to sacrifice themselves for him constitutes a fundamental disruption to the order. there is a perverse wrongness to kya or yue or hakoda or suki making sacrifices on their own volition, because it means that sokka has existentially failed to protect them by martyring himself. like, he somehow feels so guilty about suki being imprisoned that when azula reveals this piece of information to him, it literally distracts him from his own mission. and mind you, there's absolutely no way sokka could have known or been responsible for suki's imprisonment. but he still feels guilty nonetheless. and azula knows that, knows exactly how to twist the knife to make him break, because, well, it's honestly pretty obvious.

sokka obviously cannot retroactively save his mother or his first girlfriend, but he can save his father and his current girlfriend. in "the awakening" aang says he has to restore his honor after the guilt and shame of his failure in ba sing se (aang is also an incurable gifted kid perfectionist, btw, as is azula. posts for another time...) and sokka repeats zuko's line again in this episode, after experiencing the guilt and shame of his failure during the eclipse. the driving motivation of zuko's entire character, feeling like he has failed in some ontological way and must therefore redeem himself or die trying, is reinforced through aang and sokka's respective experiences mirroring that drive. aang goes out in a storm and nearly drowns to redeem himself in some vague, nebulous way, because he isn't thinking rationally. and likewise sokka, who usually always has a plan and always thinks things through, feels that caution and foresight is pointless, because he came up with a genuinely brilliant invasion plan and it didn't work, so clearly there's something wrong with him (just as he always suspected) and no amount of planning even matters, because he's a capital F Failure and always will be. and so he vows to save his father, as he promised him he would when they parted on the day of black sun, or die trying, because if he can't even do that then what is he good for; at least he'll die a martyr, which to him, is basically his ideal situation. because to sokka, dying as a martyr is basically the highest form of fulfilling his purpose (being needed, protecting people) and so if he dies a martyr, then maybe his catastrophic failure (that is entirely his fault and rests squarely on his shoulders btw) can be forgiven. so his plan is basically just to sacrifice himself for his father so that he can die "redeemed." very normal, rational, healthy behavior, i would say.

sidenote, i also see people claim that "the boiling rock" makes sokka look stupid because why wouldn't he take any of the insanely talented benders to a prison in a giant volcano surrounded by a boiling lake, and it's like. sokka literally admits that he's not being rational, that he doesn't think he's going to survive this, that this is not a good idea. it would go against sokka's entire modus operandi if he brought the children who he feels a deep, presiding responsibility to protect on a suicide mission that he's lowkey hoping will fail (because he not so secretly loves courting death. it's like she's the moon or something). he only lets zuko come with him because he doesn't actually care whether zuko lives or dies at this point. sokka has absolutely no faith in zuko whatsoever (and frankly, why would he, zuko has yet to actually prove himself to him. he didn't even kill combustion man; sokka did) so he has no idea that zuko is actually going to be helpful and supportive in a meaningful way. and frankly, if he had known that at the beginning, or even remotely liked zuko as a person, he probably wouldn't have caved so easily when zuko invited himself to join. if he didn't think that zuko was objectively worse than him and basically worthless as a human being, i doubt he would have let himself be so vulnerable with zuko in the first place. meanwhile zuko is eating it up bc he's like "omg he's confiding in me he's letting me help him we're basically besties" because he doesn't actually know sokka well enough to realize that sokka doesn't actually do that shit with people he remotely respects. shit like "my first girlfriend turned into the moon" and "i had a feeling this was going to be a one way trip" are simply not things that sokka would say out loud 98% of the time. the fact that he is admitting something real is not a testament to the trust he places in zuko, but rather the opposite. sokka spilling his guts (you know, for him) to his resident collateral damage, sokka bringing his lovingly crafted space sword on this mission, sokka not even confirming whether or not his father is actually there beforehand – he's simply stopped giving a fuck, he doesn't care whether or not he lives to see another day, because to him, he has nothing left to lose.

but of course, that also isn't true at all. i mean, for one thing, zuko still needs to teach aang firebending, so he does serve a pretty important function to the group, and zuko simply telling him to do hot squats in his absence does not qualify as significant tutelage. but also, even more importantly, sokka is integral to the fabric of the group. when he's gone for a day in "sokka's master" they literally all just shut down and start complaining about how much they miss him (we don't actually see any b-roll of the gaang hanging around the western air temple because the episode is simply too busy for that, so who can say whether the same thing occurs twice). sokka cannot afford to simply die just because his first plan failed, he still has a major responsibility to his friends. fucking idiot. i've said before that sokka has the emotional resilience of like. a pathetic wet newborn kitten caught in the rain. but like, come on man. i mean, as someone who has also suffered from debilitating perfectionist issues and never had to be responsible for a failed military invasion that cost my people their freedom, i do get it, but still. not his best moment. although there is something genuinely admirable about the fact that after he finds suki, he decides that saving suki is enough, and genuinely does want to succeed in his mission going forward. like his love for suki is one of the only things that consistently makes him happy and makes him forget that his greatest dream in life is to be murdered, and that's so beautiful to me.

the entire point of this episode, by the way, is that sokka is wrong. if that isn't obvious. sokka's entire worldview, that he only has value insofar as he exists to provide for others, and if he fails to protect people in any capacity, he has fundamentally failed to uphold the one reason he even exists on this earth, and thus he does not deserve to exist unless he is bearing the weight of everyone's suffering or otherwise proving his worth through sacrificing himself for others, is um. fucking stupid???? and incorrect. and stupid. the thing is, unlike zuko, sokka can't really point to any one person who taught him to see himself this way. he can't just face his father and tell him that his abuse was cruel and wrong, because hakoda is a good father who has never not supported and believed in and encouraged him, done everything in his power to protect him, loved him unconditionally. hakoda has inadvertently damaged sokka's psyche in various ways, of course, but never with any intention to hurt him. like, ozai tried to kill zuko, on multiple occasions. it's a pretty obvious indicator of the primary source of harm in his life. but sokka is equally if not more Unwell, and there's no one single figure he can blame, because his complex lies within a tangled web of what my best friend fanon calls the "massive psychoexistential complex" of the colonized subject. he is being dehumanized not through interpersonal abuse, but through the violent logic of imperialism. sokka's formative traumas inform his psychology as he understands that he only has value insofar as he is protecting the people he loves (namely his sister) from being murdered by imperialists, much like his mother did. and that logic is continually reified through the violence he is being subjected to, until he truly absorbs the belief that his life has no value on its own, that he is genuinely Less than [human] in some fundamental way. which is obviously deeply tragic, but also lowkey kind of comical because he also happens to be the specialest boy in the world, who literally did come up with multiple working escape plans at the world's most secure supermax on the fly, mind you! but whenever anyone tries to point that out, including piandao literally saying "you're the most exceptional and worthy person i've ever met in my life" sokka is just like "um. that is incorrect actually." like NO ONE should depersonalize themselves and feel that their only value lies in their ability to serve and sacrifice themselves for others, but it's especially ironic that sokka literally does not think he has any value as a human being, and yet he is also objectively exceptional. like, do you understand why i adore this character so much. do you.

anyway. the point of this episode isn't that sokka has worth because he's exceptional, either. that's lowkey the point of "sokka's master," but also a) sokka doesn't really internalize it and b) the more important part of the episode lies in how much the gaang just misses his company because they miss their neurotic control freak big brother who makes bad jokes. but even if he couldn't come up with multiple working escape plans on the fly, suki and zuko still stay by his side anyway because they care about him. they are demonstrating that they would risk their safety and possibly even their lives, in the exact way that sokka is always trying to for everyone else, for him. that sokka doesn't need to be the one who always protects everyone else, and that he isn't a failure for letting people who care about him help him and protect him. and sokka has to accept their help, because suki and zuko are simply too stubborn not to force him into letting them support him. they are standing in a literal maximum security prison in the middle of a volcano and they are still choosing to prioritize sokka's mental health and wellbeing, which is honestly crazy, but also exactly what he needs in this moment. suki has known sokka for what, 3 days maximum? yes they're soulmates but like, girl get up. and in zuko's case, "girl get up" is magnified tenfold, because he literally risked his life to go with him to the boiling rock (also largely motivated by the guilt of not being able to stage his own prison break with iroh, but still!) and let himself get imprisoned despite being the fire nation's most wanted criminal, stayed by sokka's side no matter what including getting thrown into a literal torture chamber for him, jumped across a gaping boiling chasm with no guarantee that he'd survive except for the implicit expectation that sokka would catch him on the other side. like zuko is so fucking pussywhipped and sokka didn't even value him as a human being until like halfway through their entire mission. insane.

in conclusion: "the boiling rock" is a beautiful story of the most mentally ill boy on the planet (he took first place ever since jet died rip jet forever in our hearts), and his two ride or die bitches who he met like yesterday, and also his dad, and a casual homophobe named chit sang, all working together to demonstrate to him why killing yourself is a bad idea in most cases, probably. it's also the story of the most insane dyke drama of all time, but that's for another post (of which i have of course made multiple, most recently, here). i said it's the apotheosis of sokka's arc, and by that i mean it's the most overt acknowledgement of what his fundamental issue is, and the first steps one must take in actually resolving it (namely, accepting help and support from your peers and loved ones). do i think that sokka is magically cured after returning from the boiling rock? no, probably not (in fact, because i'm somewhat sick & twisted myself, i like to imagine that once the war ends, he actually gets worse). but he does seem genuinely happier after they return. and maybe that's just bc kyoshi warrior pussy hits different, but like. he was able to rely on others for help (including mai my best friend mai) who supported him unconditionally and prevented him from simply giving up, and that's so incredibly important. that kind of support is always important, to everyone, of course, but as we've established, it's especially important to sokka specifically, at his lowest (quite possibly ever), in this situation. no one has an obligation to risk their life for someone else, but sokka is something who thinks that his purpose is to risk his life for other people (namely katara), and so for people who really have nothing to gain and everything to lose in standing by and promising not to leave without him, to actually show that they support him unconditionally is huge. if sokka has no fans then i am dead and so is suki zuko hakoda toph aang piandao iroh the mechanist etc etc etc. perfect episode <3

#suicide / #writergracethepanda #asks #analysis #sokka #sokkaxsuki #cinematic masterpiece the boiling rock part 2 #(technically i use that tag to talk about maizulee but swagever) #this post is basically just stream of consciousness unstructured rambling so i hope you find it valuable in some way... #at this point i've given up on trying to do Readings of and make Arguments about sokka #and i'm just rambling. i posted a whole fucking. ACTUAL essay about him yesterday and no one read it #but this is not that. this is. who even knows. it's certainly not an ''essay'' #my thesis statement: i love sokka so much #my body paragraphs: hes a weak willed mentally ill fucking IDIOT #just trust me ok. trust the process

[lyss-butterscotch]

AHHHS HIT FUCK BITCH IN THE MIDST OF MY INSANITY I REMEMBERED UI PEBBLES SHINE A LIGHT REPRISE.G OD DAMMIT I JUST KEEP SINKING FURTHER AND FURTHER

[TW: Mentions of suicide]

You made a mistake reminding me.

#this is probably the most straight up evil depiction of ui ive drawn #just #yeah #tbf #if it ever gets to this point #shes willing to do what is necessary to get the message across #nothing personal #tw suicide #tw mentions of suicide #rain world #gijinka #unparalleled innocence #five pebbles #lyss art #doodles

[mishapen-dear]

and a spare jaiden thought. because what the fuck was all that death. all that constant death. her minimap drenched in red from the endless death. she has been so self sacrificial at LEAST since bobby died, and now this?

jaiden has more family now. she has red team. she felt like cucurucho was the only one there for her, her only friend. traumabonded to an evil bear, now traumabonded to an evil cult. they have died with her. she will die for them. over and over and over and over and over again. needless in the pure quantity of death. her life is nothing to her. and why the fuck should it? the colour of the map doesn’t bother her- her world is already red

#qsmp #qsmp jaiden #tw suicide #CCJAIDEN PLS INCLUDE PURGATORY IN YOUR CHARACTERIZATIOM #shes just so. #and the way she spent her lives endlessly. Like a resource. A tool. #something to be thrown away and played with #and how willing she already was put herself in danger #and now she’s finally getting results for it #she originally accepted cucurucho’s tasks because she thought it might help protect the other eggs #and look where that ended up #but now. Putting herself in danger is getting results #dying is getting results #she can see the tangible effects of her suffering #imagine how addictive that must be

[roxannepolice]

Fifteen: *clearly let go off much of the Doctor's self-and-other-destructive prometheanism, accepts the reality of their adoption with maturity, is again fascinated by the universe in its ugliness no less than beauty*

Fandom: OMG, purest happy baby 🥰🥰 he healed so well, bye bye all traumas, rehab with Temple-Nobles went excellent!

Fifteen: *exhibits signs of ability to self-reflect*

Fandom: AAAAA HE'S SUICIDALLY DEPRESSED!!!!!!

#tw: negativity #i blame four years of wallpapering thirteen with depth #this is one of the most mind boggling temdencies in any fandom imo #the moment a character shows any introspection or is willing to think for thinking's sake THEY'RE SUICIDALLY DEPRESSED #tw: suicide mention #doctor who #fifteenth doctor

[moongothic]

So I'm confused about something. There was a cover story about Ms Goldenweek and other Baroque works agents breaking Crocodile out of prison but he just. Told them no? And stayed there with Mr 1 and Mr 2? I don't get why he wanted to go to Impel Down just to break out when he had the chance

I can't tell you 100% why Crocodile chose to stay in prison and go to Impel Down, but my best guess really is that he was just...

Taking the L with grace

More specifically. Crocodile had lost everything. I think deep inside he might've been literally too depressed to want to go free again.

Like he does literally say that. He gave up.

He had been building his reputation as "the Hero of Alabasta" for at least 10 years at this point. He had built not just a criminal organization that he had been running for four years, but also he had been running legal business stuff (like his casino) for probably longer than that. A decade's worth of work and effort to take over a country, and most importantly, get away with it. The reason he had orchestrated that whole rebellion was so that the rebels and the royal family could "take each other out", leaving the country wide open for a World Government Official such as himself to take up. The reason Baroque Works was doing this all in secret was so that the WG never found out, otherwise they wouldn't have let him have Alabasta.

But indeed, his plans were foiled by a kid in flipflops in less than 24 hours, just at the final moment before Crocodile would win. He lost everything. And the World Government found out about what he had been planning.

So even if he escaped from that prison with his former agents, what was he going to do?

He wouldn't be able to take over Alabasta anymore because he did not have manpower (as he had lost all his goons), and having lost his financial empire he wouldn't be able to build a new army any time soon. And even if he did, now that they knew what he had done the people of Alabasta would not accept him as their new king, even if he personally assasinated Cobra and the entire family. Not to mention, the WG finding out about his plans meant that they had every fucking reason to try and stop Crocodile if he did as much as set foot on that island again. By which I mean, they could launch a Buster Call on his ass. Send all the fucking Admirals after him. And so, even if Crocodile still believed Pluton was somewhere in Alabasta and that he just had to comb through the entire desert to find it... Between the Alabastan people and the WG in the way, finding Pluton would not be easy. Especially when Robin wouldn't even be there to just point him directly to it. It could take years, if not decades, while fighting off the WG by himself. And that's while assuming Pluton was somewhere in Alabasta. Like WE the readers now know Pluton is in Wano, but since Robin didn't tell him that. All Robin said was that the Poneglyph "didn't mention the weapon", and Cobra's reaction to the name merely proved the weapon's existence in Crocodile's mind. But surely, because Crocodile is a smart young man, he'd understand there was a risk that Pluton could exist, but just not be in Alabasta, right? Like that would be a possibility too, right?

I think this is why Crocodile has given up on Alabasta. He had one opportunity at seizing the country, and he failed. And without Robin, he could spend the rest of his life combing through a haystack for a needle when there's no needle, and he'd have no idea. I think is why he explicitly says in Impel Down he no longer has "interest in that country". He won't be able to pull off another stunt like this, ever.

And that leads us back to "why not escape earlier and avoid going to Impel Down to begin with". Thanks to his status as a Shichibukai, Crocodile hasn't been on the run from the WG for like two decades. And the past 10 or so years he has seemingly lived a life of luxury in his funny little casino. But now, having lost everything, he'd be back on the run. And because he's a world famous former "hero of the people", there would be nowhere he'd be able to go where people would not recognize him and send the marines after him. So he'd be on the run, for the rest of his life or until he'd get capture again. And mind you, the guy does not trust anyone, so he'd be on the run alone. Without any purpose or goal.

And you might be thinking, "Daz and the rest of BW was still there!", yeah, arguably true. But at this point Crocodile had no reason to trust any of them. Like personally, I think the reason Crocodile ended up taking a liking to Daz was BECAUSE he chose to follow him to Impel Down when he really did not have to. Like Daz showed an unusual level of loyalty to Crocodile, and I think Crocodile recognized that. That's why Daz is still with Croc, post-timeskip. But Miss Goldenweek and co? Crocodile had no reason to believe they wouldn't betray him if given a chance and a reason. And if the WG would come chasing his ass, they'd have plenty of reason to try and betray Croc (handing Crocodile over to spare their own lives). Not to mention, when they come release their former boss from jail, what did Miss Goldenweek say?

"Let's do Baroque Works again"

As I've already explained in detail, I think we might know why Crocodile wasn't interested in being Baroque Works' "boss" again.

So. Yeah. If in Crocodile's mind he'd be on the run from the Government for the first time in two decades all alone, in a situation where rebuilding what he had before would be bloody hard if not downright impossible, and he wouldn't be able to obtain what he had spent the last decade working for regardless...

Taking the L and just going to prison might've been the easier option

#Moon posting #Asks #OP Meta #Sir Crocodile #Long post #Mind you Crocodile only *left* jail because he saw AN AMAZING OPPORTUNITY for petty revenge #Like had it not been for that war bringing Whitebeard out he probably would not have bothered to try and fight WB again #Otherwise he could've just escaped prison with Goldenweek and co and travelled to the New World to fight the old man right away #((Also theoretically Crocodile might've been slightly suicidal with the ''taking WB's head'' thing)) #Also worth noting that Crocodile choosing to stay in prison could've had two other purposes re:the former agents #It could've been a test of loyalty (to see if anyone would stay with him or would they all abandon him) #Which could be important to Mr Trust Issues (and to be fair he did find at least one loyal subordinate in Daz) #((Like if they had all told Croc they'd stay with him...... Who knows. Maybe he might've chosen to escape after all?)) #Other option: Crocodile escaping with them would mean the agents would be in much more danger than they'd be without him #Like the WG wouldn't send tons of marines after the individual agents if they all scattered to the winds #But if they all stuck together they'd become a bigger target. And even more so if Crocodile was there to lead them #And like. IDK if Crocodile was willing to leave out Goldenweek from the assassination order and spare her... Maybe this was the same #Maybe he wanted to spare Goldenweek (and the rest?) from being put into danger by going with them? #I dunno man this reptile has far too many layers to him I can't tell what's going on in his head

[theblackphoneislife]

You're here..? Robin Arellano x Vance Hopper (Dead/Ghost! Vance x Suicidal! Robin)

Summary: Vance died three years ago. Robin and him were bestfriends before Vance was kidnappedand killed by the grabber. They spent every waking second with each other, from the time they both got up, meeting up to walk to school together and then walking back, spending their evenings together splayed across the roof of Vance's house.

Tw: description of gore, death, suggested suicide, boy x boy

This is part One! Part two is titled: You're here..? (Part two!)

Robin had believed that the rumors of a ghost residing in his house were merely fabrications, stories designed to frighten young children.

"It's not even real, Vance isn't haunting my house, okay?" He told his friend over the phone, as he lay on his bed. "Yeah, I live in that house he was buried in, but it doesn't mean anything!"

That was five hours ago, and now he'salone in the middle of the night, staring at a fucking ghost, Vance Hopper.

Robin sits on his bed, staring at the ghost of Vance- Fucking -Hopper. How in the actual Fuck!? He's a ghost. How can he see Vance!? Why was he here!?

He just sits on his bed, not moving to get up or lay back down. He just sits with his back against the headboard, staring.

"...Robin?" Vance called out, with a slight waver in his voice as he took a step into the room.

He was a mess, from the dried blood all over his clothing to the gash across the back of his head, he looked like he'd just survived a murder scene. Except.. he didn't.

"Hey, Robin...?"

"Vance.." Robin answers, voice shaky as he looks at Vance's ghost. "You fucking douchbag. You said you'd make it out."His breath is shaky, trying to sound angry, and he pats the spot next to him on his bed, practically begging for Vance to join him.

"I tried!" Vance replied with a yell, making a face as if he was hurt by the fact that Robin's still mad at him.

The ghost takes another look up and down at the state of the bedroom...his room, and makes a face as he takes a seat next to his friend. "Christ...what a mess."

"Look, I'm sorry..." Robin starts, voice still shaky as he reaches out for Vance, a pleading look in his eyes for Vance to come to him and not keep them apart."You just... it got worse after you left and... and I miss you so much..." He whispers, loud enough for Vance to hear as he tucks his thin legs under the rest of his thin body.

He continues holding his arms out for Vance to come closer.

Vance hesitates for a moment, trying to fight back the feeling of comfort he craves, to not give into Robin.

"…Ro...I-" He began, until he finally caved and moved closer to Robin. "...I miss you too, you idiot."

It'd been three years since he'd seen the boy, and yet it felt the same as the last time they'd met, the same warmth he felt from his hugs he could feel right now.

Robin hugs Vance tightly. Even if he can't feel any warmth coming from Vance's ghost, he tightens his arms around him and buries his face in Vance's cold chest.

He shakes a little while mumbling into Vance's chest, "I f-fucking miss you.." it's meant to be a little harsh, like he'd had a horrible time without Vance and wanted to hurt him by saying it, but it comes out soft and shaky, almost like a plead.

Despite his ghost-like form, Robin would feel Vance shift and adjust to face the boy a little better before pulling him tighter into the hug and wrapping his arms around Robin.

"I know..." Vance said, voice shaky. "I wish we'd been able to meet again."

Robin could feel Vance's hand stroke his hair, a comfort he was familiar with. Vance would always do it when they were together. It makes him take a deep breath and calm slightly.

#cw: gore #death tw #Willing suicide #robin x vance #Robin Arellano #Vance Hopper #Dead! Vance #Suicidal! Alive! Robin

[happyk44]

Just. Thinking about Percy who wants to die and would willingly kill himself if he ever got to that point versus Jason who wants to kill himself but can't because suicide is dishonourable so instead he'll just go through dozens battle after battle and hope he gets an injury that will cure all his problems versus Hazel and Nico who don't want to die because there is so much to live for but would be content to sacrifice their lives if they had no other choice because they do not fear death

Like I'm just. Rotating that in my head on repeat right now and feeling THINGS about it. I mean Percy is always on the lookout, waiting and fearing for the overflow that'll make him turn Riptide on himself, because it's not an "if, it's a "when", he knows it in his gut it's just a matter of time, and Jason is always prickling with an unending internal distress he doesn't understand because what even are emotions and campers cheer him on as he seeks out worser and worser monsters, no one ever knowing he's holding back screams when the battle ends and he's still alive, no life-threatening incurable injuries to land him in the underworld forever and then there's Hazel and Nico, who both have suffered so much, dealt with so much heartache and pain, as though the Fates themselves had been told that children of Hades, children of Pluto, are not supposed to live and be happy, but nonetheless they carry on, air in their lungs, heart pumping, knowing that the world has so much to offer and there is always something to do, even if that's extending your help, your life, to others.

#hazel levesque #nico di angelo #do you ever think about how hazel sacrificed herself and died horrifically after years of trauma but said yeah why not when offered rebirth #percy jackson #jason grace #happy talks pjo #suicide tw #im sure you guys are tired of me babbling about suicidal percy and jason and willing to live hazel and nico #but i am simply vibrating with feelings and vibes and mininal concrete thoughts so this what we getting

[balasha7sanbardo]

there’s so many people under the palestine tag talking about how “how can you be happy about murdering people” referring to what happened yesterday morning and the ongoing events of the Palestinianian resistance. I would like to introduce y’all to ✨colonialism and genocide ✨

Palestine has been under occupation for 75 years. 75 years of murder and genocide. Millions upon millions martyred, tortured, in prison without reason, stripped of their humanity, apartheid, sieged and annexed from their lands, their homes, every fucking human right violated. They have practically near nothing to this day. Is that not terrorism? Is that not extremism? Where were your cries about that?

So no, I recognise my own and people’s humanity and I don’t want people to die, but if you’ve been killing me and my family and community and destroying my land and stripping everything away from me - reducing me to nothing - you bet your fucking ass I’m gonna throw punches and fight back whether it hurts you or not.

We are not going to sit still and wait for our murder. Resistance is about standing up for what is right. It has never ever been done without death, discomfort, fear, or pain. I want people to be safe and ok on both sides because its not black and white - but I also want my people to fucking live. They are the oppressed. My people know that if they are going to die, they want to die fighting. This is just the reality. We will not just sit and wait for our deaths. You can mourn and be scared and worried for everyone involved. No one really wins in this fight. We lost so much. People will die on both sides, but the fight matters. The resistance matters. Their lives matter.

#stop taking away from that #fuck the Israeli occupation #anti zionisim #zionists fuck off #anti semites fuck off #free palestine #palestine #palestinian resistance #save palestine #from the river to the sea palestine will be free #my posts #balasha7sanbardo #also acknowledge that a retaliation is going to cost us lives 10 folds of israelis #just fyi #so what we’re doing here is suicide #but we’re willing to do it anyway #Palestinian liberation #ok to rb

[everything-stays-here]

Parallels

The virgins suicide - Young Royals

(1999) (2021)

#parallels #the virgins suicide #young royals #wille young royals #yr parallels #young royals netflix #young royals season 3 #crown prince wilhelm #wilmon #wilmon endgame #wille x simon #movies #mixed media

[magz]

The criticism make sense n necessary - because of consequences of the internalized transmisogyny of article "I Am A Trans Woman. I Am In The Closet" by Jennifer Coates,

Especially with how harmful spread rhetoric uncritically was as part excuse for MRA rhetoric n "misandry real" logic grow even more in LGBT n feminist spaces online

But cannot help but be remind of some the depressed trans women (of color) am known n friends with for several years, that have been in abusive irl situations n feel like there no escape there n no escape of closet ...

Especially in those moments when the weight of the world caves in on them.

They aren't feeble or weak ... Magz love them, are our friends, n it painful see go through that whenever have happen - at risk of suicide.

N the harshness can sometimes make it worse n they deserve our love n patience when possible ... So am kind of. Try be delicate too, on personal level. As am TME person with several transfems important to us in our life.

Still - Those article thoughts shouldn't have been spread publicly as "how all trans women think like" n that centering men n thinking of men all as potential trans women was somehow good - was not. We have even more rampant misogyny n transmisogyny.

- when instead should have been explicitly as acknowledge the effects of systemic and internalized transmisogyny has, or not spread at all.

#am miss you. #Basically: is bit different if magz as a tme person rb a criticism that call depressed transfems weak-willed. am have no excuse. #text post #o post #transmisogyny #sij #suicide mention

[mercymaker]

Shame on us, doomed from the start May god have mercy on our dirty little hearts

#baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #bg3edit #bg3 oc #bg3 tav #drow tav #oc: maleane #this is all for the photoshoot reasons and me being a dramatic bitch sdfsdfs #she would NOT on her own volition i don't think BUT #it did make me think of the fact that years and years and years later #when mal is just absolutely fucking going through it #astarion becomes almost convinced that she might one day absolutely off herself and with that leave thoriel to starve or something #which motivates him to come back more and more often #and also makes the idiot realize and accept that he actually does fucking care more than he's willing to admit #anyways there's that on that #also that song is SO fucken mint #suicide cw