#witness ? me bitch

[peakvincent]

i’m not doing the wrestle big bang not because i can’t commit to writing 10k but because once i finish a fic i refuse to wait literally any amount of time to post it

#* #witness me bitch

[suchawrathfullamb]

the fact that abigail would've probably lived (at least a little longer) hadn't will said "I already did"...hannibal looked baffled, "how dare you?"

he knew will was right. but he felt betrayed. heartbroken. you can see his face journey in this moment, where we goes from being taken aback, to then figuring out what to do, how to respond, and that's when we see him deciding, the best proof that will is wrong is to do the worst, most brutal thing.

"come to me, abigail". let's see how much you've changed me.

#will regretted that answer so much #the CHANGE in his face is so amazing to witness #so petty also like #you think you've changed me? bitch no way #watch this then #hannigram #nbc hannibal #hannibal #will graham #hugh dancy #murder husbands #mads mikkelsen #meta

[noahkirschtein]

i can't believe binge watched all 6 seasons of 9-1-1 in 6 days just for buck and eddie not to kiss. like they're actually married with a child wdym they haven't kissed yet ?? and aren't dating ?? like who the FUCK is even natalia bro.

season 7, abc, my mental stability is in your fucking hands

#i just know chris' teachers gossip about who this “buck” person really is and what his relationship with eddie is #they're married your honor #witness ? me bitch #oh and carla #9 1 1 #9 1 1 buddie #9 1 1 abc #evan buckley #eddie diaz #christopher diaz

[chaos0pikachu]

where's my crackfic where sanji and zoro are constantly bickering and fighting over luffy until nami finally snaps and is like "you can both fuck him, he's rubber"

#one piece #one piece live action #sanlu #zolu #this is not a zosan safe space don't even try it wit me #this is zoro being hella jealous that sanji thought for half a second he knew what luffy needed #and sanji snapping back with don't hate a hot bitch who can cook i can be luffy's malewife #tell me it wouldn't be hilarious that zoro does wild ass crazy sword moves bc he knows luffy will be hella impressed #and then sanji cooks like an entire sea king to one up him #luffy getting spoiled is all i want for my twink pirate son okay #chaos pikachu speaks

[stuckinapril]

Think I’m making communication a non-negotiable for 2024. If you don’t know how to properly communicate like an adult we quite literally can’t be friends

#I’m not trying to be a bitch like I get that this is hard for lots of people for various reasons #i think I’m just at a point where I want people to come correct instead of waiting for them to potentially get better #only for me to learn in the harshest way that they’re only getting worse #I’m not gonna be ur practice run this year. come when ur ready #the moment I sense someone isn’t saying what they mean it’s so over. like I’m flexible on so many flaws but NOT this one. communicate !!! #the people pleasing is literally kicking in rn but I’m just trying to be honest w myself about what my capacity can handle at the moment #and I’m genuinely at my wits’ end when it comes to communication. so I don’t think I’d be the best person for people like that #is this mean?? this feels like a fair boundary to make #p

[brother-emperors]

what's. what the fuck wrong with them. good grief. I need to put the three of them in a jar and study them

Mark Antony: A Biography, Eleanor Goltz Huzar

Julius Caesar and the Roman People, Robert Morstein-Marx

Mark Antony: A Biography, Eleanor Goltz Huzar

#if you follow me elsewhere you may have witnessed me descend into some kind of dolabella madness yesterday #which took an abrupt left turn when i got to the 11th philippic like YEAH ACTUALLY TEAR THE BITCH APART. GET HIM CASSIUS #justice for my man trebonius. cicero's letter to him got me feeling so emotional #this love triangle political clown show bullshit has a body count that makes the tris homines look moderate as a whole good GOD #gaius julius caesar #mark antony #roman republic tag #drawing tag #komiks tag

[mochiajclayne]

Kurama and Sukuna watching their respective vessels interact with their homosexual shounen rival and say silly goofy gay statements™️ like carrying burdens and dying together and/or not affording to die because the other will kill them if they die again.

#sasunaru #itafushi #yes I've been watching jjk for like a while now #imagine being alive for thousands of years and witnessing your vessel pining for their black haired crush #naruto #naturo shippuden #jujutsu kaisen #like I just know these two would drink tea together and bitch about naruto and yuuji lmao #kurama: your brat is whipped too huh #sukuna: bold of him to say he can't afford to die as if I DID NOT RIP HIS HEART OUT #but like imagine them talking shit about sasuke and megumi #kurama: the brat can't even handle me as hatred incarnate lmao the audacity to say he'd save that uchiha brat from his hatred #sukuna: (jjk manga spoilers) lmao I stirred the pot between them so let's see if their gay love can beat the king of curses #mochiajclayne.txt

[dukeofqueers]

Ser Fel, the Chimera Knight or Unmoored Knight

i love my arisen who was so cringe and fail that he got removed from his own world. get ratio’d by the Endless Cycle idiot

Thora, the other Arisen in the nihilism meme belongs to @missszena​ <3

in game featuring his pawn Leoris

#dragon's dogma #dragon's dogma dark arisen #ddda #fanart #sketch #art #artists on tumblr #ddda arisen #dragon's dogma oc #my art #screenshots are a bit outdated he has the diabolic shield now. i grinded for this bitch #fel isn't from gransys but don't ask me for names i'm entrusting the sequel to give us more world lore #he defeated his dragon but didn't kill it and got fucked over when he was lured to bitterblack. got lost there and was displaced entirely #thora is the one who stumbled on him and he's wound up in her world but hasn't managed to get back to his #he goes back to bitterblack after witnessing this cycle gets lost and turns into a living armor #note to the cycle maybe next time don't pick the depressed jaded knight as ur arisen. bro couldn't even be arsed to finish his quest #i think often about the lack of mystic knights and most of them appearing as undead. inherently doomed vocation or whatever #anyway i'm terrible at finishing any art for fel sry #i'm gonna go make myself emo over fel's relationship with leoris now. see you whenever

[oonajaeadira]

listen. This is for your own good.

If you ever have children and decide to bring them to Disney, that's expected. And if you insist on keeping them in the park for longer than they can walk, that's on you and nobody will think twice about you carrying them. They are yours, and therefore yours to bear.

But when you use a stroller at Disney--remember, this is because I love you--you are actively making yourself into an obstacle and therefore making your child everyone else's issue. I mean, I get it. Raising kids and keeping them happy is a big job. You do you.

But I want you to take a deep deep breath before you enter that park with a stroller and repeat the mantra, "Today, I make myself an enemy to everyone here. I accept this, and I have nobody to blame but myself." This will be helpful to you and everyone around you. Do not go feral on people when they won't make way for you. Trust me, it will not end well.

Unless you're pushing a double-wide.

Then I hope the devil screws your skull through both eye sockets.

#Balls lady. #Just because you have reproduced your bitch genes does not mean the sea must part for you. #You are not Walt's chosen one. #Not me but witnessed

[visceravalentines]

so I teach at the local community college right

one day in class last semester my laptop flipped out and all the sudden I was projecting my half-written dilf Bo smut fic on the big screen for a good 8 seconds (had NOT gotten to the good part yet thank fucking god) and the students were literally like "uwu what's that??"

I shut it down real quick, shrugged it off, said "I write sometimes in my spare time" and figured that was that

well

today's the last day of my lab this semester and one of my students from that class and this one gave me a super sweet card about how much she's enjoyed the course and having me as an instructor. and at the end she put "we only got that one glimpse but your writing is really good. keep it up!"

crash bang boom kablam fatality blood on the carpet see you never bye forever

#gave me six new gray hairs over that one #close ur got damn word docs people #learn from the error of my ways #the best/worst part is i KNOW some of those students are ao3 bitches and i KNOW they know what second person is for #brb entering witness protection

[spinosaurusenjoyer]

I hope obnoxious Astarion fans, specifically the ones who:

- Gleefully post on every single piece of Wyll content about how he’s boring and doesn’t deserve more content from Larian (vile)

- Who also sometimes comment similar shit on Karlach and Lae’zel content

- Who treat SHs entire character as “Astarions cunt bestie” and that’s it like that’s the entire point of her (and again wrap content about her back around to being about Astarion)

- Who pick at every trauma response or mentally ill behaviour Gale has while excusing it when Astarion does similar behaviours or worse ones

- Who gleefully shit on Halsin acting like he’s just a worthless creepy old pervert (WHILE AGAIN LIKING ASTARION MIND YOU) and delight in commenting on Halsin content (so at his fans) about how they just use him as Orin bait

- Who go to every piece of Minthara content and are frothing at the mouth with the urge to immediately tell her fans about how they revel in killing her on every single play through so they can take her armour for Astarion and because she’s apparently “a worthless character not worth knowing”

I hope all of *those* Astarion fans break their arms and legs lmfao. I am so tired.

#these are all real behaviours I’ve witnessed!!!! #Astarion critical #I guess? I mean it’s nothing against him at all even #fandom critical #bg3 critical #larian critical #normal Astarion fans this isn’t about you. kisses you on the mouth #some of you are so funny and good and creative #and I love him too bitch! #but those types oh my fucking GOD #literally just be normal on content of other characters?! #I don’t care if you don’t like them #but why are you SO eager to unload onto me your glee at killing Minthara #like. okay? #why are you coming into spaces for Minthara fans and doing this? #I don’t go and hype up staking Astarion on your content #leave us alone #my post

[thelastharbinger]

Tidbits of ATSV That I Enjoyed (Or Alternatively: Just Miles Being The Most Endearing Spidey Ever)

Miles patting The Spot's head after successfully webbing him (I don't see this as condescending, but rather him still engaging with the humanity of a villain like Spot) and ~very assertively~ telling/asking him not to escape.

"I'm like Robin Hood-if he gave to himself."

Miles' spidey senses going off when he arrives late to his dad's party because there's nothing more frightening than Brown parents when they're mad at you. Beware the chancla or correa!

O.k. So we all know there are different versions of the movie out there. You may already know that one of the slight differences is when Miles goes to save Inspector Singh. There's a version where you can hear Gwen's voice in the distant background yelling no! when she thinks Miles gets crushed under the rubble, and there's another where she's silent as she webs to him. Now, I have found ANOTHER version (online) where her shouting is even more at the forefront. She's practically screaming and sounds more desperate, (prolly because it's close to the same way her Peter Parker died so she's reliving trauma) and the fear in her voice is palpable. That one haunts me.

Jefferson trying to equate studying for his police exams to childbirth, which Rio quickly nips in the bud.

Ganke having a soccer poster of Son Heung Min, a famous Korean footballer who currently plays for the Premier League Tottenham Hotspur and is captain of the South Korean national team.

Miles having a Sashimi (his universe's version of Supreme, but I just like the idea that Miles loves eating sashimi. Like I know that kid has good taste in food) poster in his bedroom.

The fact that Miles kept in touch with Aunt May for long enough after the events of ITSV that he helps her move.

The Spot saying he was one of the more handsome scientists at Alchemax according to his colleagues.

Miles and Gwen having the same collectible toys, the only difference being that he keeps his in the box and she doesn't.

"Hey, don't try to wow me with big words, man," *in deep manly voice* "I do crosswords every day"- Miles after Spot points out Alchemax as "the crucible of our connection!"

Miles going, "This job is so dumb sometimes" after he tries to web Spot at the deli, but it goes through a hole and lands on his face.

"Nahhh, he seems more Dominican to me." Kinda want Miles to meet a native Dominican Spidey because that dynamic would highkey fuck hard *pun not intended*. They would repair relations between our two islands-PR&DR.

"Almost there Mami *smiley face* *cowboy* prayer hands*"

The college admissions coach at Visions Academy straight up saying, "That's your story! Now, just stick to the script..." Ma'am what???

"Calmate Mami, eso no es my fault."

"I've hit a lot of different villains with a lot of different food...I'm just trying to lighten the mood."

Miles in his angsty teen era and smart-mouthing everyone around him. Love that for him.

"He almost killed his mom as a baby, I mean, look at those shoulders." No but for real tho. Those shoulders are as wide as a truck. Kim Seokjin who??? (if you understood that reference, ily).

Miles writing a love letter to his dad in 2 cakes.

Gwen at the water tower chowing and saying how feelings make her hungry after her and Miles talked about how they can't be together cause it would end in tragedy. Like Gwen, come again?!

Also, Miles' and Gwen's talk at the Williamsburg Bank Building being lowkey the catalyst for the 2nd/3rd acts of the film. Without them both kind of silently admitting their feelings for each other, Miles probably wouldn't have chased after her the way he did. Pretty sure you know the rest.

"I bet she doesn't even speak Spanish," and Jeff going "Que barbaridad" in his very broken Spanish. Queue Rio's bombastic side eye.

Both Gwen and Miles referring to Spot as a Villain Of The Week, even though neither of them have spoken about Spot to each other.

"I was bitten by a-wouldnt you like to know? Know what I mean?" SIR. Chill. This movie is for children.

The Spot inverting himself, going from a white mass with black spots to a gaping black hole with smaller white spirals. It's giving Junji Ito.

The irony of Pavitr exclaiming, "Well that was another easy adventure for Spider-Man!" right before an incoming canon event. HIS. He was about to experience his first big loss, and his happy-go-lucky nature would've been challenged.

Miguel saying conyo! when all the Spideys start pointing at each other.

"!Cállate!" "Nosy!" Sidebar: we don't talk about Gwen's banter with bad guys enough. She's so funny!

A lot of the Peters saying hi to Gwen as she passes HQ because she is canonically the one lost love--the love interest they all would've ended up with had she not died, so they all have an affection for her.

Web-Slinger going "Giddy up!" Cause he's swinging up.

Miles offering his fresh new takes on how to deal with the Spot upon meeting Miguel, saying "He just wants to be taken seriously. Like we all do." MILES YOU BEAUTIFUL, COMPASSIONATE GOLDEN SUNFLOWER BOY I LOVE YOUUUUU.

Hobie referring to Peter B. as Humbling Reality Spider-Man, which considering how steeped in tragedy the Spidey lore is, is really saying something.

Miguel's nonono no puedo más no puedo más. His misery is very funny and delightful to me. Little bitch ass.

"You know you're the only Spider-Man who isn't funny." Yes! More Miguel slander in the next one, please! Little bitch ass.

"Snitch!"

Miles shouting out Peter's name for help whilst Miguel pins and lays into him the fact that he's an anomaly. This after he momentarily glitches back to his ITSV store-bought suit. Mimicking the way-in also the first movie-Miles shouting out Peter's name for his own rescue as Doc Ock attacks him at the research facility. Because even though he feels hurt by Peter at this point, that's still his dad mentor and he still instinctively looks to him for protection. Rip my heart out why don't you!

Gwen sneaking back into her and her dad's place just to get that printed polaroid of her and Miles, a pic she already has on her phone.

Earth-42 Miles wearing Nike while our Miles wears Jordans.

#hi. ive seen this movie 8x in theaters and twice on pirating sites. i am unwell #also sorry not sorry for the miguel slander. i am a miles loyalist thru and thru thst bitch is on thin ice #but also literally can't get over gwen “it really is so nice to get to talk to you. me & him its different. in every other universe...stacy #cause directly underneath that she's actually saying. “i missed you. and what i have with you i literally do not have with anyone else and. #you dont know this but ive met hundreds and thousands of spiderpeople. nd even in my friendship with hobie its not like what i have with yo #and im actually really smitten with you. the one person i shouldn't be smitten with bc there is no happy ending for us. and idk... #if i should hold off. and im letting you know all this so that you can decide for me. whether to take that lesp of faith or not with you. & #hope that say yes and make the first move so that i cant but help to just sink into you.“ #AND IT MAKES SENSE! SHE MET HIM JUST AS HE WAS LIVING THROUGH AN EXPERIENCE SHE DID. OF BECOMING SPIDEY. AND RIGHT AFTER #SUFFERING THE GREATEST TRAGEDY OF HER LIFE WHICH SHE WAS ABOUT TO BEAR WITNESS THRU WITH HIM. SHE WAS THERE FOR HIS UNCLE DYING AND WATCHED #HIM BECOME SPIDERMAN. WE FORGET THAT THEY ACTUALLY WENT THRU SOME HEAVY THINGS TOGETHER. THEYRE TRAUMABONDED. I KNOW THATS NOT WHAT THAT WO #ACTUALLY MEANS. BUT IT MAKES SENSE THAT SHE CAN ONLY TALK TO MILES BC THEY PERFECTLY UNDERSTAND EO. #anyways idk why im shouting. im high rn. but crazy how all of that meaning was subtly thrown in there. like we got a confession scene folks #from gwen of all people! i love that for me. #also back to miguel: so i know he's hot. but if a hot person were to ever be rude to a waiter we agree theyre no longer hot right? right. #atsv #miles morales #itsv #miguel o'hara #the spot #ghostflower #gwiles #gwen stacy #ghost spider #gwen x miles #rio morales #across the spider verse #into the spider verse

[yeetlegay]

Like a kid on Christmas morning who found a can of whoopass under the tree

#the incredible combo of his ‘try me bitch’ vs ‘have you heard of our lord and savior jesus christ’ expressions #he looks like a jehovah’s witness going door to door kickboxing for jesus #but also like his dick is hard you feel me? #it’s called ✨acting✨ look it up #kinnporsche #why don’t queue stay

[trekkele]

role swap that isnt a origin swap ft gothams baby alien princess and her batdad

#something about me is that if i can have bruce and kori interact in any way i will take it #look at me and tell me he wouldn’t lose his mind over giving kori a safe and stable home #that is an baby refugee who was sold into slavery by her own family and then proceeded to escape with nothing but her wits and her teeth #A BABY #koriand'r #bruce wayne #gotham knows shes something else but will cut a bitch who says something about it #she crash landed on earth and the JL stood around arguing while bruce offered her a lollipop #and she imprinted #dick rolls into gotham as an angry 16 year old and falls head over heels #Bruce agrees to train him because Kori asked so it must be important #kori adores her little brother jason #doodles from the discord

[whipbogard]

Do you feel uncomfortable when people talk about Justice for Palestinians? If you do then maybe it’s your Islamophobia and I suggest you go get it checked asap

Also fyi it’s not only the Muslims being murdered rn if you REALLY wanna go down that line so think about it

#cant believe we’re witnessing genocide in real time #and people still has the audacity to say BUTTTT #what have your history lessons taught you? #or did you fucking flunk your history? #also Gal Gadot fans fucking unfollow me rn #I can’t stand that hypocritical bitch anymore

[electras-heart]

what one do i watch first banshee and or outrageous fortune and are either of them good or are y’all just horned up be real with me here

#and do either have anyone serving looks bc a requirement for any tv show i watch is atleast one bitch dressed better than everyone else #cause i’ve seen banshee screenshots and never once have i witnessed an outfit that has been interesting #also i know that’s not a part of the plot but #like whatever ok. level with me here #if that rabbit from zootopia ate while also being a cop well damn so can he 🙄