rockyjulesxx

[rockyjulesxx]

wolfstar angst

“Tell me I’m pretty” 

He wanted to hear him say it. To let his easy words describing his beauty wash over him, and cleanse him of his sins. He needed to know he was still beautiful, even after the acts he was about to commit.

The other took a large step forward, and tucked a loose strand of hair behind his ear. He leaned forward and whispered close to his ear “you’re the most beautiful creature to ever walk this earth. Pretty doesn’t even begin to describe your beauty.” 

who is saying what to who here ? and what is the context ?

#wolfstar angst #wolfstar #wolfstar headcanon #mauraders #the marauders #marauders era #sirius angst #remus headcanon #remus angst #remus and sirius #sirius black #remus lupin #i’m bored and found this convo in my old notes before i even got into the mauraders #thought it fit them though #angst #i’m a whore for angst #dead gay wizards #marauders headcanon

[rockyjulesxx]

sirius angst i want in fanfics

i want to see badass sirius. like actually badass, completely unhinged sirius. i want to see sirius smash bottles on peoples heads, knock them to the fucking ground, step on their balls, grab them by their chin, laugh and spit in their face, and walk away like nothing fucking happened. this mother fucker doesn’t throw punches, he destroys people.

before doing something completely dangerous and reckless, i want to see sirius turn to the person who is trying to stop him from doing said act and mischievously smile at them saying “i am god”

i want to see one of the marauders walking into their shared dorm only to find sirius kneeling in broken glass- some plates from the cupboard had fallen to the ground and shattered all over the floor. in a panic sirius tried to clean the glass up with his bare hands before anyone could see the mess he had made- he started sobbing out apologies and begging for forgiveness to the person who found him bloody and dazed on the kitchen floor and had asked him what had happened

i want to see sirius being selectively mute when he goes through difficult times because he’s used to his mother punishing him by putting him in dark enclosed places for extended periods of time and going days without uttering a word.

i want to read more fics that showcase the real aftermath sirius’s trauma left him with. i want to see the good, the bad and the ugly. i want to see how the abused knows all to well how to abuse, and how they can’t seem to escape their place of trauma no matter how hard they try. i want hurt/comfort that shows what real hurt looks like. some fanfic authors have never experienced trauma, and it shows.

#sirius orion black #sirius black #sirius angst #padfoot #mauraders #the marauders #marauders headcanon #marauders era #fanfic #wolfstar #marauders fanfiction #wolfstar angst #wolfstar headcanon

[rockyjulesxx]

marauders fandom needs to develop a better sense of style

demanding more fics with gender fluid sirius in dresses and skirts

#genderfluid #genderfluid sirius black #trans sirius black #sirius black #mauraders #the marauders #padfoot #sirius in a skirt #not an ugly one either like a cute skirt #or dress #stop dressing sirius in bland ass clothes in your fics #he wore more than leather jackets #sirius is a fashion icon #treat them as such i beg of you

[rockyjulesxx]

the chronicles of remus john lupin: the start of moony’s life viewed through snapshots

remus john lupin is the only child of hope and lyall lupin. born march 10 in cardiff, wales.

at ten years old he got into a car accident that left him with chronic pain for the rest of his life.

a little over a year later, he was fully recovered and finished with rehab. within this time his father had left him and his mother- the medical bills were stacking up and his fathers guilt of being intoxicated while driving the crashed vehicle “forced him to leave,” according to the fair well letter he had left behind. his mother was wonderful however and took care of him and worked 60 hour weeks to support the both of them through this time. hope never seemed to stop smiling and somehow always had fresh baked cookies for her “beautiful boy” ready on the kitchen counter. remus always thought she was magic.

a core memory in his childhood was on his twelfth birthday when he and his mother sang the rubber band album together in their backyard. they had twirled each other around and cooked dinner with the vegetables they had picked from their growing garden . even during in that moment, all remus could think about was how that instant would be a memory he would always remember. the still image that remains burned into his mind of his mother’s fine hair flowing behind her as she laughs half spun around remus’s scarred hand always aches behind his eyes. he searches to find a smile as genuine as his mothers on that day.

two weeks later remus received his second letter. this one retrieved from his mother’s will. she had hung herself amongst the trees in their backyards forest. march 24 was the first day remus ever experienced pain.

by thirteen remus was well accustomed to being in group homes in london england. he always carried his mothers old books, records and golden locket that held a flower petal from his old garden from home to home.

by fourteen he was already developing a smokers cough, and constantly got caught up with older group home boys who introduced him to the night scene in london because “who had never been to leicester square after living in london for a year?”

at fifteen he met lily who was drawn to him because of his intelligence. she wanted someone to study with after her last and only friend and her had a bad falling out. she quickly found out that remus wasn’t as aloof and punk as he appeared to have been walking down their school’s corridors. he was much more kind and compassionate than she could have imagined her study partner ever being.

on new year’s eve that same year in a crowded bar that lily suggested they visit, remus had his first kiss of the new year from a boy adorned with leather pants feather boas. a boy with long dark hair who danced his way through the crowed with not a care in the world. every eye was on him and every hand stretched towards his direction, but only remus saw the smile that evoked just has much joy from his soul has his mother had on that day. in that instant love at first sight was made for more than just the movies.

sirius and remus were forever, that remus made sure of. he vowed to never see sirius’ smile as just a smile. he knew there was more, more pain and sorrow that hid beneath it that no one was ever supposed to know about. but remus knew that smile- it was his mothers smile. and this time remus isn’t twelve and naive, he’s 16 and determined to make a forever a reality.

#remus john lupin #remus lupin #wolfstar #remus headcanon #remus angst #remus and sirius #remus and lily #marauders #the marauders #young remus lupin #hope lupin #lyall lupin #punk remus #marauders era #moony #padfoot #remus being remus

[rockyjulesxx]

the correct marauders & co. head cannons pt. 2

Lily Evans

bisexual icon. uses she/her pronouns but does not correct someone if they use something else because even though she loves womenhood and feels connected to femininity, she doesn’t really care about gender.

raging activist. this is seen through her style because even though she dresses very light in pastels and soft skirts and dresses, all of her tote bags have activist propaganda sewn onto them.

she knits all of her hats and sweaters and makes a bunch for remus too.

she loves her light cottage core aesthetic, but she also heavily delves into grunge styles.

she has long wavy red hair, styled with curtain bangs.

she’s plus sized and loves showing off her tummy.

freckles <3

she has some light patch work tattoos that aren’t very noticeable across her body.

she has beautifully sculpted eyebrows that are frequently complemented upon, and has rich forest green eyes that james won’t shut up about.

shes 5”3-5”6 in height but will stomp on you with her chunky heels.

lily is welsh and loves talking to remus in their shared native tongue.

Marlene McKinnon

RAGING LESBIAN.

loves her punk style constantly says “it wasn’t a phase mom.”

she has platinum blonde dyed hair that she purposely let’s her natural hair peak through at the roots. it’s roughly shopped just above her shoulders with bangs.

has a medusa piercing along with many others and tattoos.

wears an excess amount of rings and eyeliner.

docs everyday all day with leatherjackets she steals from sirius’s closet and decorates with her own patches and buttons.

shes 5”6-5”9 in height (constantly tries to gaslight everyone that she’s taller than sirius even though they’re clearly the same height. she refused to see it though because “she’s not the same height as a little bitch.”)

loves boobs, especially her own, and often wears bralettes as shirts.

she’s an italian immigrant and constantly tells everyone that italy is better than britain.

she’s also bipolar and originally bonded with sirius due to similar struggles he experienced with bpd. she was the only person sirius felt comfortable with telling everything about how his mental illness truly effected him.

Dorcas Meadows

unlabelled but used they/them pronouns.

they’re very spiritual and love astrology. they keep crystals on them nearly all the time.

they're black and have their hair braided (they braid their own hair and think about opening up a small business to do others). they weave castles and charms into their hair too <3.

loves wearing long skirts with crop tops. it’s their go to staple outfit that never fails.

they love walking around barefoot. they say it feels more freeing (very much daisy johns and the six of them).

doesn’t really like to be called a hippie, they think that they dress more grunge than anything.

they’re about 5”5-5”7 in height. (marlene loves that they never wear heels, she likes being a lot taller than her partner).

they don’t mind being referred to as feminine terms such as girlfriend because they believe that “feminine” words are just words and have no real meaning because societal gender ideals are fake.

Regulus Black

asexual and biromantic. uses he/him or they/them pronouns because they’re autistic and don’t really care or align with societies ideals on gender.

he has a constant frown on his face that causes his brows to pinch together (sirius always tries to smooth the line forming there, telling reg that “wrinkles aren’t pretty, what does he have to be frowning about anyways?”)

whereas sirius has high cheek bones, regulus has a strong jawline and a prominent chin that points out.

they also have a very prominent brow bone that casts a dark shadow over their eyes, making them look almost black instead of blue. this eye structure is different from sirius’ double lidded eyes (regulus hates when people say that he looks similar to sirius and constantly looks for facial differences between them- there are a lot, the two don’t actually look THAT similar).

his style is very minimal, he often wears a plain white tee with black jeans.

their hair is short, dark and curly. they let their curls fall over their face and refuse to slick it back because that’s that his father used to do.

he’s 5”8-5”10 in height (he loves the few inch difference between him and sirius because it annoys his brother to no end).

they’re also half french and east asian.

i could honestly make more for the rest of the gang, this headconnon shit is fun because i’m just so right

#regulus black #marlene mckinnon #dorcas meadowes #lily evans #the marauders #marauders era #marauders headcanon #oppsimadethemallgay #dead gay wizards

[rockyjulesxx]

the correct marauders head cannons

Sirius Black

GAY AND TRANS ASS MOTHER FUCKER!! #endthecisaficationofsiriusblack idc if it’s genderfluid, non-binary or ftm this bitch is trans and loves men.

he’s like 5”6-5”9 in height.

obvi has black hair that is up to his shoulders/ collarbone and is also very layered.

he’s tattooed and pierced. some tattoos are of the moon cycle, his and regs stars, dog foot prints and something prongs and wormtail related. he also has multiple ear piercings with a side nose stud, a navel and a bottom labret piercing.

he loves dressing hyper feminine but also masculine. he doesn’t have a set style, he just dresses to serve cunt and have clothes that match his docs and chunky rings and leather jackets.

he has borderline personality disorder that he is very ashamed about because the characteristics of his mental illness remind him of his mother. he also has ptsd that affects him the most through nightmares. he also gets a lot of gender envy that fouls his dysphoria from his friends, but refuses to tell them about it because he doesn’t want to make any of them feel bad.

he’s pale and has silver eyes that can be kind of intimidating.

he’s half french and east asian ( him and james first bonded at hogwarts over being the only asian kids in their year) .

EYELINER!!

Remus John Lupin

bicon. no other acceptable answers.

sweaters. knitted sweaters. lots and lots of knitted grandpa sweaters. (many gifted to him by lily).

his style is very cottagecore, but also mixed in with some street style. he loves his beat ass crusty ass converse that are breaking at the seams, but he also wears docs when he wants to feel superior. he is either spotted in heavy knitted sweaters or old band tees. and a book bag. he cannot go anywhere without his fucking book bag.

he has tattoos. idk what tattoos, but definitely tattoos. and maybe a few ear piercings.

he’s 6”- 6”4 in height.

loves david bowie and sometimes wears makeup inspired by him.

wears fishnets under his jeans that are visible on his waist when he wears crop tops. this is slutty remus.

he has honey brown curly hair. it’s soft and bouncy and sometimes falls into his eyes that are obviously hazel.

freckles scattered between scars <3

has a physical disability that requires him to use crutches or a wheelchair from time to time. he also suffers from severe migraines that leaves him unable to leave his room.

he has ptsd and severe anxiety that went years without being medicated because of his “i can handle myself” mentality.

he’s welsh and/or jewish or maybe even latino anyone of those work tbh. he has soft tan skin that very glowy.

long eyelashes. like incredibly long eyelashes that are light brown and always curl towards the sun.

James Fleamont Potter

a pansexual himbo at his finest.

he’s from south asia, more specifically india.

he’s super sporty but not overly buff. he has the body type of a football player (or soccer player, whatever you call it).

his style is very relaxed in a man whore kind of way. he loves his red converse- they’re his staple piece.

he has one ear piercing he got with sirius. he thinks it looks stupid but sometimes puts it in when he wants a different look.

first started wearing skirts with sirius so that he felt more confident, but actually really liked how they looked on himself. he has slutty skirts he wears when he goes to the gay bar.

he has adhd and maybe anxiety that somehow went years without being diagnosed.

he has deep brown hair that’s messy and could possibly curl but always remains more fluffy than curly. it’s short cut but falls into his eyes that are a dark brown but look burgundy in the light.

he’s 5”9-5”11 in height. (sometimes he purposely tells people he’s shorter so that he makes guys who said they’re 6” feel stupid).

obviously wears glasses (he’s technically legally blind and has a lot of anxiety of loosing his vision. he got eye sugary once and had to wear an eye patch for a week. he still wears it sometimes for halloween or just for fun).

has a beauty mark under his left eye (lily likes to kiss it).

Peter Pettigrew

he’s asexual.

has a baby face and is often mistaken for remus’s little cousin.

he gets rosey cheeks very easily.

he doesn’t have tattoos but he has a few piercings.

he has a unibrow (it’s very pretty and has a beauty mark in between closer to his right eye).

short king! 5”4-5”6 in height.

his style is cardigans with jeans that are cuffed (half because of his height and half because of fashion).

he has dirty blonde hair that’s straight and cut short.

he has bright blue eyes.

he has body dysmorphia and social anxiety.

he has a very small gap between his teeth that he hates and tried to get braces for but couldn’t afford. everyone tells him it suits him though because the gap adds to his charm.

he’s a brit through and through, a full englishman

i’ll make a part two of this with all the other marauder icons.

#sirius orion black #sirius black #remus lupin #remus john lupin #james fleamont potter #james potter #peter pettigrew #wolfstar #marauders #marauders era #the marauders #marauders headcanon #dead gay wizards #padfoot #prongsie #moony #wormtaiil

[rockyjulesxx]

oh look! it seems as though i’ve reentered my “all my friends hate me, and are pretending to tolerate me” phase

#unhealthy coping mechanisms #friends #mentally unstable #mental illness

[rockyjulesxx]

the sexual tension between me and changing my instagram pronouns so i don’t have to come our irl is getting a little too heavy

#lgbtq #genderfluid #non bianry #trans #gender stuff #gender identity #genderqueer #coming out

[rockyjulesxx]

only hot people can dress like a damn professor with cable knit sweaters one day, and slay the next looking like everyone’s friendly neighbourhood slut in fishnets

and yes, i am hot people.

#hot people #genderfluid #i am hot #fashion

[rockyjulesxx]

i want to be masculine in the way girls are masculine, but also i want to be feminine in the way boys are feminine. oh but i also want to be super, super androgynous in the “i’m that hot person little kids tug their parents clothing on in order to ask if i’m a boy or a girl” kind of way… and somehow people still ask me why i have no real perception of what i really look like. smh

#non bianry #lgbtq #genderqueer #trans #gender stuff #gender identity #pronouns #what is this #confusion #genderfluid