#AND MAL LOOKING AT HIS FUCKING STATUE LIKE THAT!!!!!!!!

[itsalwaysforyou]

hold me together.

kenny ortega, descendants 2 / holly black, red glove / nicole homer, underbelly / ada limon, a new national anthem / k c cramm, christmas eve forever / kenny ortega, descendants 3 / the crane wives, curses / silas denver melvin, let dead dogs lie / natalie wee, least of all

#descendants #descendants web weaving #jay son of jafar #mal bertha #jal #i think i have said everything i could possibly say about them #just. something about mal not telling jay she wants to go back to the isle #not even asking if he wants to go back bc she’s too afraid of the answer #he’s on sports teams and girls are fawning over him and shouldn’t he be happy? why would he want to go back? #and jay. remaining steadfast as ever in his loyalty CONSTANTLY #even when mal doesn’t tell him everything. even when she lies to everyone #he’s the first one to accept her apology. ‘you were just trying to do the right thing’ #like something about devotion corrupting. how jay just wants mal back again. no matter what she does he still loves her #(for better or for worse) #AND MAL LOOKING AT HIS FUCKING STATUE LIKE THAT!!!!!!!! #the one person who truly knows her. gone. he turned away from her before he was turned into stone #oougghhhh #and just. jays presence. the way he stands behind mal in it’s going down. waiting. #they’ve done this so many times before. they’re a well oiled machine. they’re fluid and fluent and have been doing this for a long long tim #anyway. them #jal renaissance baby!!!!!!

[aleksanderscult]

Why do you hate Mal?

(TW!: verbal abuse! slut shaming! alcoholism!)

Well, long story short, he's a huge dick.

I could write three long metas about his toxicity and why I dislike him but I don't want to tire my fingers for him. 😑

Maybe because of his slut-shaming behaviour?

Oh and what is this? Ah yes, Mal being angry that Alina found happiness away from him:

I'm so sorry Mal that Alina wasn't tortured so you could feel okay. I'm so sorry that she didn't feel insecure enough to run back in your arms, needing you and depending on you like you always wanted for her.

You know, that's the thing with Mal. He did nothing to Alina.

Not when his "friend" was mocking her appearance (and yes this is serious for me because I too have a very thin body and people from my own family have mocked me for it. So it's no joke).

Not when she was apparently sad that he fucked around girls knowing that she knew.

He did literally nothing until Alina wanted to fuck the Darkling and showed interest for him.

(slut shaming her even here)

From then on he ✨magically✨ noticed her out of nowhere and he said that "now I see you".

BULLSHIT!!

According to Mal, it's okay if he fucks girls every other night but it's not okay when Alina wants to do it with a man that....I don't know. Supported her power and abilities maybe?

And he seems constantly so concerned that she has fucked him that he apparently doesn't care if she's truly okay.

What a normal person would say to Alina: "Are you okay? Did he hurt you? I'm sorry you had to go through this."

What Mal said to Alina: "FUCK TORTURE! DID HE FUCK YOU BY ANY CHANCE?!?!"

He's so unserious FR

That's his only concern. If Alina likes or fucked the Darkling (sometimes I wish she had done the latter just so I could see Mal's face after it).

Also! He's an extraordinary bad influence for Alina and her confidence! 😍

A few minutes ago, Alina decided to return to the Little Palace to lead. To do the right thing and stand in this war.

And now we have Mal threaten her: "If you go, I might not follow!!"

And that shattered Alina's confidence. Now she feels ashamed ("maybe he doesn't want me", "maybe he'll leave me") and after that passage when Mal exits the tent, Alina starts thinking "What am I doing? I'm no soldier, or Saint. How will I make it?"

Mal is an influence that constantly wears her down emotionally by making her doubt herself, making her have guilts and making her thoughts come back to him constantly ('cause he's always "What about me?? Think of me!! Look at how shit I feel!!").

Again, he makes the whole matter revolve around him.

There is a civil war ongoing and Mal is like "Okay, but what about me, Alina??!!?!"

LIKE BRO NOBODY GIVES TWO SHITS ABOUT YOU!! THERE ARE PEOPLE DYING HERE!!

And another toxic trait of his. Apparently, if a woman says "no" to him, it's unacceptable:

(The first passage is when Mal tried to kiss her but Alina saw the Darkling behind his back and the second one is when Alina saw Mal kissing Zoya, btw)

He gets angry for the fact that Alina withdrew from his attempted kiss. And apparently he "knows what that means" because every girl he had ever kissed was willing to him.

I'm sorry, Mal, for the fact that a girl changed her mind at the last minute.

If a girl changes her mind, then you must respect that. Not shout at her. NO MEANS NO, MAL.

Mal is that type of guy that throws you in bed, you kiss him and all, and at the last minute when you change your mind and don't want to go for it (for whatever reason the girl might have of course) he gets angry and says "BUT YOU SAID "YES" TWO MINUTES AGO!!!"

He gives me the ick for real, guys.

And, of course, his fury for Alina's power and status. Because, since she gained them, she's no longer depended on him.

Yes, people. Mal wanted to take out a piece of her soul essentially, so he could have her! Romantic!! 🤩🤩

Also, the fact that he was constantly looking like shit in S&S because he was drunk every night is also selfish of him. Mal was Alina's personal guard and protector. One of her three closest ones. By doing this, by having this behaviour, he gives a VERY bad image to Alina.

Imagine what the nobles would think if they saw him this way. The power of image is everything. Nikolai knew it. The Darkling knew it. Even Alina came to know it. By having one of your protectors drinking heavily all night, get into fights and look like shit makes Alina feel embarrassed for the image she gives to the other people. And she was actually in a very delicate position at that time, because she had to gain the trust of the King, his counselors and nobles. Mal should know better than embarrassing her.

Imagine if you were in a high position for the first time in your life, trying to make an impression so everything could go alright and, in the meanwhile, your guardian walks around drunk.

This is not good. In today's world, they fire such people from their work.

And all these bullshit from him in R&R saying "I told stories of you from your childhood so they could see the real Alina" is also bullshit. Bitch, if you wanted to do something good, look respectable for the part. If you want to cry and drink kvas 24/7 then resign, lock yourself up and do it. Don't embarrass your boss.

Also, Bardugo had said that after S&S she received a lot of negative comments about Mal's character. So it's no wonder she made him suddenly all "good" in R&R. She wanted to give reasons to the readers to like him and support his eventual marriage with Alina.

Anyways, I know people will say that the Darkling was no better but, guys...

This is not a competition. Of who is better or worse.

And just like another person had once said in this fandom "The Darkling represents a fairytale character while Mal reminds you of every jerk you've met in your life"

And it's a perfect quote to describe them.

The Darkling is the type of guy we all fall in love in fiction. A fantastical character that does bad deeds but still you swoon over.

While Mal is that asshole you met in high school treating you like shit. That boy you were seeing in corridors flirting with every girl he saw and being a fuckboy. That relationship you had that undermined your value.

Mal is a character that hits very close at home for the readers (with his actions and personality).

This post about him and M*lina explains my thoughts perfectly.

Go read it when you can, guys. It's an incredible mini meta.

#fuck that man #reminds me of a relationship my sister had with an asshole #so his character really hits close at home for me too #FUCK! HIM! #the Darkling should be redeemed by the very fact that he wanted to kill M*l #Aleksander + the readers 🤝 wanting to obliterate M*l's ass #anti mal oretsev #anti mal #anti malina #grishaverse #shadow and bone #siege and storm #ruin and rising #grishaverse trilogy #alina starkov #the darkling #pro darkling #aleksander morozova #pro aleksander morozova

[endollvors]

Mal Autonomy Manifesto

She's doing Very bad, for the record.

This is just the highlights of D2, because if I did everything we'd be here forever.

The movie starts with Ways to be Wicked which is canonically a stress daydream Mal's having after being cornered against a statue by a large group of adult press who are actively breaking the law by being there. And they refuse to leave the premises until an authority figure makes them.

Then she's immediately grabbed by the wrist and dragged away for a dress fitting by Evie. We'll get into the fitting in a second but Dark shout out to this moment in the movie Novelization

"Yeah," said Mal, nodding. In a way, she was strangely relieved. More time to rest, she thought. Keeping up this act is exhausting. [...] Evie grabbed Mal's arm and spun her around. Mal cried out in surprise. "If we don't do a fitting for your ball gown right this minute, you'll be dancing in your bathrobe," Evie told Mal. "Bye, Ben," She added as she deftly dragged Mal away. There goes my nap.

At the fitting, the appointment intended to make sure a garment actually, you know, fits, Mal says that the dress it too tight, that she can't Breathe in it. Evie dismisses this concern out of hand. She can breathe after Cotillion.

The secret to fitting in, the book that Evie(veteran of 15 years of fucked up princess training) disparages her for using magic to read is about Courtly Etiquette by the way.

Mal broaches the subject of wanting some of the freedom the Isle provided. "Don't you ever miss running wild and breaking all the rules?" I miss being in charge of my schedule and Evie says "No, We're Auradon girls now." and drags her around the room. "We can be whatever we want to be here." She says. Interesting then, how little what Mal wants matters.

Mal tries to get to class and is stopped by Jane, who immediately launches into a barrage of questions she is uninterested in and unprepared to answer. She attempts to leave, stating both that she is busy, on a time crunch to get to her classes, and that she trusts Jane to pick what's best. Jane ignores this, grabs her arm again, and keeps her there until she answers, regardless of the cost to Mal.

Mal learns that there are aspects to attending Cotillion with Ben that she was unaware of. These are serious, affect her life in the long term, and Everyone knew but her. She's visibly surprised and upset. She asks if her whole life has been planned out in front of her without her say so. Signs point to yes.

Ben interrupts her at her locker. She says she doesn't have time. She has to get to class. Seriously, she's going to be late. Ben grabs her by the arm, "No, come this way." And drags her over to give her his present.

Mal is chased into the boys dorm by a barrage of reporters. They are still trespassing. They are inside the building. Love that. She's clearly visibly stressed, Carlos calms her like a spooked horse and she has an outburst. She says that people are following her everywhere, that there's so much she can't say for proprieties sake. She asks, "Don't you ever miss screaming at people and just making them run away from you?" I miss setting boundaries. Carlos says of course not, do you have the magical gummy that I asked for? Mal asks if he's really committed to telling the truth because she can't be honest without fearing being literally deported. She then shares, halfway to hyperventilating that, at this point, its not particularly unappealing. At least this all would stop, right? Carlos ignores this.

(Denouement, I'm not gonna defend the everything about this but know that I interpret the Spell thing as her trying to undo her mistake, literally turn back the clock so it never happened and isn't considering that she's mind wiping him. This is what she does when she does something wrong. Late to class etc. Like, it's still fucked but you know comprehensible. Adding that he frames her using magic as taking the easy way, like she hasn't looked 40 seconds from curling up in a ball and shivering like a hypothermic kitten all day, and that's with the magic.)

Mal leaves. She packs a bag and writes a letter and goes to the Isle under her own power. Ben follows her, convinced that the fight is the only reason that she would do this, and that he can track her down and talk to her and that everything will be fixed. The others help him do this.

So, he shows up, she physically recoils from him, cries, asks him multiple times to leave her alone, to go back to Auradon without her. he says this. Which is my number one least favorite Ben line of all time. "The people love you, I love you, don't you love me?"

I'm just gonna mention here that Mal never actually agrees on screen to go back to Auradon, she just gets in the car after Ben calls for her.

Ben asks if she wants to cancel Cotillion. She doesn't answer the question.

Girl talk is a mess of a scene. It will be it's own post bc it makes me INsane. But the relevant bit is that she describes her problem as the pressure to be perfect, to be something completely different than she's been her whole life up to now, and under constant scrutiny to maintain an act that exhausts her. Everybody else in the circle reassures her that Ben loves her, Not actually the problem she mentioned but ok, and tell her to attend Cotillion no matter what.

Evie tells her to go if she’s up for it, immediately after saying she’s going to take the some of her extremely limited time that afternoon to alter her dress. Jay told her to go, to try one more time as a condition of the relief they had already denied her.

When she arrives at Cotillion, Evie asks how she's doing and Mal says she feels like she's gonna throw up Evie says, "That's ok, That's fine. We're all here for you."

On the way out the door, Mal is grabbed again, stopped by the Former King and Queen, so they can apologize, and offer their explanations, immediately.

Jane and Lumiere block off the top of the staircase to prevent Mal from being able to escape before they can show her something.

Like. ok. Ben loves her, so what?

It can’t save her. If she could have been saved it wouldn’t have gotten to that point. She wouldn’t have run away, been followed, been emotionally blackmailed, been brought back, been told to go to Cotillion anyway. She wouldn’t be Engaged to be Engaged to be Engaged.

#mal bertha #mal descendants #disney descendants #unhinged descendants opinions #as promised #descendants 2

[thetimelordbatgirl]

So I watched the teaser for Red and I have lots of questions:

Why Cinderella’s hair and Chloe’s hair blue?

Isn’t the actress for Chloe half white?

Why there’s a Merlin Academy hall of fame in Auradon?

Why Queen of hearts have a beef with Cinderella? Isn’t that supposed to be Lady Tremaine?

Why Uma is principal?

Why didn’t they change Beast’s statue to Ben’s?

Isn’t Wonderland an imagination in Alice’s head?

Why the Villains are considered VKs?

Why the heroes are in school with the villains? Especially Jasmine, Aladdin and Cinderella?

What’s going on with this?💀

Answering in order here:

*Honestly no fucking clue- I assume its because they want their main characters to have colorful hair like the prior main characters in Descendants 1-3, but even their hair looked better then Cinderella's, both young and old, and Chloe's blue hair. I really don't get why they were allergic to just, letting Brandy and Malia keep their normal hair instead of shoving ugly blue wigs onto them, but... *I do not know about Malia Baker's ethncitiy, I just know with the ugly blue wig and the lighting on that photo shoot, she looks light- not as light as Audrey did at times in D3 with her blonde hair, but you know, its up there. I do know Descendants fucked up when announcing this whole film, aka implying Dara Renee was casted as Chloe, but nope, turns out Dara is playing Ulyana, Ursula's latest younger sister, and Malia Baker is playing Chloe...so don't know what the fuck happened with Descendants there but....and if Malia is half-white...yeah I guess I wouldn't be surprised with Descendants and their track record with POC....or actually Hollywood in general, sufferer of Fate the Winx Saga here... *I can only assume its because Auradon Prep took Merlin Academy's place when Beast established it and such. How it affects what Ben said in D1: "Auradon prep, originally built over 300 years ago and converted into a high school by my father when he became king." can only be described as contunity/timeline breaking....aka Descendants favorite past time- but because of this, I just guess they count Merlin Academy students as ones to honor, since they learnt here once as well. *I have zero fucking clue WHY Cinderella and Queen Of Hearts have beef beyond someone in the Descendants writing room likely threw darts randomly and whoever they landed on would be parents of main characters and also have random as fuck beef- though bold to assume they'd allow Tremaine and Cinderella to have beef, D3 basically at the end was pro-forcing victims to forgive their abusers so like...

*Uma's teaser established that she was asked by Mal (no D*ve means get used to Descendants finding ways to mention Mal in this film) to become principle of Auradon Prep, so uh, that's why- no clue where Fairy Godmother is but she is confirmed to be returning in the movie so like- personally, I don't think Uma as principle makes sense character wise, but I do also see the reasoning other's have used for this character decision so like...its not the worst thing in this film. *I'm pretty sure the statue is less of a current ruler thing and more of a founder thing, since Ben said his father wanted it to remind people anything is possible when Beast founded Auradon Prep. I also don't really see Ben caring much for a statue of himself, since he doesn't give me the vibes of that. Plus, bold of you to assume Descendants films would give Ben a statue, they'd give Mal one over him with how Ben was treated in D3 in comparison to Ben, the actual ruler, during the meeting scene. *In terms of the animated film only? The vibes are that yes, Alice imagined Wonderland after dozing off, since she wakes up back in reality just as shit is hitting the fan. But let's be real, Descendants stopped caring about keeping to the animated films a while back, so they just gonna make Wonderland a real place and roll with it basically. *Answering those two together really on the VKs thing and the school thing: because Descendants is now entering EAH/SFGAE rip off terrority really, aka the idea of future fairy tale heroes and villains attending school together basically. Therefore, all animated films stuff and Descendants contunity/timeline is thrown out the window in favor of this. Like Jasmine and Aladdin logically should not be meeting at this point because they meet first time in animated and Jasmine was kept inside the palace her whole life?? Cinderella at this age would technically be being forced to be step-family's servant and therefore not likely allowed to attend school even? FUCK IT- rip off time! Not like EAH can do much since Mattel basically killed it in the end and SFGAE is doing god knows what right now...

And to that last question: "What's going on with this? 💀" Good question! I do not fucking know. I just know I wish someone would put the dumpster fire out already, but when this movie was announced, it was two movies, so god help us if they go ahead with the second one...

#disney descendants #descendants #descendants the rise of red #the rise of red #again i need to emphasis on the malia thing i have zero clue what her ethnicity is #i just know shes definitely looking light in that wig and shit #also like if your curious if im watching...i dont really plan to #while i joke i torture myself with shit like this i really have no reason to want to check this mess out beyond maybe uma #but china confirmed her part in the film is small so like #i manage to avoid watching the mcu nowadays which i used to watch for torture in the end so like #for the weird space all i can say is ask tumblr why i kept getting an error when publishing before i decided to put the space in

[bucket-barnes]

What a fool you were

Guess who was feeling Stabby 😀…it was me. I crave violence and have some lingering bisexual rage against Harry Hook- here’s some angst! Hope you like poison!

TW: someone’s gonna die and I do not shy away from trying to make you cry. If you’re unable to handle depictions of sickness and death, feel free to pay this no mind and keep scrolling. If you’re here to let me make you cry, read away.

(Characters: sea three, sorta but not really core four+ben, hook siblings, lost revenge crew)

He was a fool

He was an absolute fucking fool

They were sent on a diplomatic mission in Camelot, King Arthur wasn’t willing to comply with some of king Ben’s new laws regarding the…villains. Uma and her pirates had been sent to deal with the problem, since, no one would dare mess with Uma and with her entire crew to back her up, there was no way this could go wrong…right?

It took ten minutes for the meeting to derail and turn into a battle. King Arthur refused to compromise and Uma wasn’t backing down, after a few pointed comments at the young sea witch, sword were drawn and a fight ensued

Metal clashed with metal, swords and daggers flew across the room, breaking statues and knocking lights off the walls, one pirate’s sword ended lodged in the round table. Uma was preoccupied, fighting two knights at once, it was honestly child’s play for her. The knights were trained to fight with honor and uniform, Uma was trained by pirates, to never let her enemy know her next move, it was almost too easy

And then she heard it…that unmistakable yelp

Uma turned around and saw Harry collapse to the ground, his hand clasped over his abdomen…and a knight, with a now bloodied dagger clutched in his hand

Uma saw red. In a flash, the knight was pinned to a wall and the room went silent, weapons clattered to the ground, and knights tossed up their hands in surrender. The lost revenge crew were gathered in a circle around Harry…he wasn’t getting up

Uma ran to her first mate. He was lying on the ground, his hand shakily covering his wound, his breath was uneven and his forehead was beaded with sweat. Uma moved his hand, and then she saw it…dark purple mixed in with red

No…no, no, no. Not him, anyone but him

Uma’s hands began to tremble, traveling up to Harry’s cheek. She looked up at Gil, who already had tears in his eyes

“…Call Ben” it was supposed to sound like an order, but it came out as more of a desperate plea. She looked at Jonas and didn’t have to say a word, he simply nodded and lifted Harry into his arms.

The next couple days were dark. Ben had called every doctor in Auradon, all coming back with the same answer, that there was nothing they could do, it was a kind of poison no one had ever seen before and nothing they tried was working. Mal begged, pleaded with Hades, her own father, to do something, anything to save her friend…but not even the gods could help…all anyone could do was wait. Wait for the inevitable

Uma never left Harry’s side. She stayed with him on the ship, crew members rotating shifts on guarding the door of the captain’s quarters, if they weren’t guarding the door…they were saying goodbye

Harry had changed a lot in the past few days, both physically and mentally. His skin had become a sickly pale, almost like porcelain, his once piercing blue eyes were now cloudy and distant. He didn’t talk, he really only had the energy to mumble and whisper, even then his words would often be interrupted by coughing or moans in agony. He’d try to put on his same suave exterior, not wanting his loved ones to be sad when he eventually passed, though there was only one time he couldn’t keep it together

…with his family

His father was off getting drunk somewhere, unable to cope with losing his only son, his boy. Harriet and CJ were there. Harriet held his hand and knelt down to kiss his forehead, her own eyes glassy with tears, trying so hard to stay strong and not cry in front of her little brother…she could really only manage one phrase

“I love you” the words coming out as a choking whisper. Harry squeezed her hand as hard as he could, as if to tell her “it’s ok”

It was much harder when it came to CJ. Callista Jane, his baby sister, she really did look younger to him. Her features looking more innocent and child-like as she held her brother close and cried into his shoulder

“Please don’t leave” she cried. Harry let a few of his own tears fall as he whispered “…I’m sorry” he couldn’t make that promise, he knew his time was coming, that no one could do anything about it…all he could do was apologize

Harry’s last day was peaceful. It was just him and Uma in the captain’s quarters, she held his hand while he looked into her eyes and smiled, it was a weak one, but he could still see her and that’s all he needed. Uma didn’t let him talk, she knew it’d be too much energy for him and she wanted to spend as much time with him as possible, however much time that was

Harry managed to muster enough strength to tuck a piece of Uma’s hair behind her ear, he always loved her hair. Seeing those teal waves always made his day, whenever she asked him, he’d help her braid it, he loved watching it blow in the wind…he’d miss that…he’d miss her

It took some convincing, but Harry got Uma to lay with him, wanting to hold her one last time. She had her head on his chest and his face was buried in her hair, taking in that one last smell of the sea. They laid in silence, coming to terms with the inevitable. Uma took to listening to Harry’s heartbeat. It was uneven and strained, like his body was fighting to keep going. She began to notice a pattern

One, two…three, four. For every two beats, there was a pause, almost like a very slow, ticking time bomb of death, she stayed on his chest for the rest of the day, her tears falling on his skin as the pattern broke…and his heartbeat faded

One, two…three, four

One, two…three…four

One, two…three…

One, two…

One…

…

Numb, that’s what she felt, Uma felt numb. She felt Harry’s hand still wrapped around her arm, it felt cold and empty. She slowly moved his arm and sat up, she stroked his cheek…and she moved a little closer

Maybe, just maybe…

…Maybe the fairytales are right…

Ooooo~ it’s open ended~ you decide how it ends! Is this penance for writing this sappy piece of shit? Yes, do I regret it? We’ll see in the morning! If I made you cry that means I did my job. If you’re wondering “Bucket, where did you get this demented idea?” I couldn’t tell you, but I hope you liked it! Even if I just made you sob

#disney descendants #harry hook #disney #descendants 3 #gil descendants #ben descendants #carlos descendants #evie descendants #jay descendants #descendants 2 #descendants fanfiction #descendants fandom #angst #poison

[artzychic27]

Another random thought: Sparky and I have done a few of these, but I would love to see your take on the VK/AK kids meeting the Class of Heroes/Villainy gang, who are essentially alternate versions of their parents.

Roselle: *Squishing Ben's face* JULEKA! LOOK HOW CUTE HE IS! Don't you just wanna hug him?!

Julebeast: Sweetie, let him breathe... But, I agree, he is so fucking adorable.

Ben: Aw, thanks... This is gonna sound weird, but you remind me a lot of my parents.

Roselle: Well, as your stand-in parents for today-

Ben: I never agreed to that.

Roselle: We are going to tell you how your relationship with Mal is built upon lies.

-

Mireides/Juleficent: *Staring at Mal* ...

Mal: ...

Mireides: Let's uh... Let's never speak of this again.

Juleficent: That is completely fine with me.

Mal: Same.

-

King Marc: Well, I must say, your makeup work is resplendent. Your Prince is a lucky man.

Evie: Well, actually, I'm dating Dopey's son, Doug.

King Marc: ... You're joking, right?

Evie: No. He likes me for who I am and sees me for things other than my beauty.

King Marc: ... I don't understand the words you are saying. Does he see you for your vast riches?

Evie: No.

King Marc: Your royal status.

Evie: No! That's so shallow. He sees me for my intellect and my goal to become a successful fashion designer.

King Marc: ... Have you hit your head, dear?

-

Sleeping Nath: Look, I probably would have done the same.

Audrey: Really?

Sleeping Nath: Of course. Who wouldn't become a badass spell-caster with a just as badass song, and try to get revenge on the person who stole your significant other? And let me just say, you deserve so much better.

Audrey: Aaw! Thank you.

Sleeping Nath: No prob... *Falls asleep on the grass*

Audrey: ... I... Anyone?!... He just collapsed!

-

Gil: Dude! How much you bench?!

Kimton: How much does an oven weigh?

Gil: Awesome! You know, it's weird, you look a lot like my old man, down to the colors, and- Oh! Hey, babe!

Kimton: You've got a girlfriend?

Gil: Actually... *Harry makes his way over and kisses him on the cheek*

Harry: Hey, love. *Notices Kimton* Who's the musclehead?

Kimton: ...

Captain Reshma: I know, it's weird. But, queer pirates. * Taps Harry's hook with her own*

-

Uma: *Gripping on one Mylensula's tentacles* I'll ask again. Who's the most badass of the seven seas?

Mylensula: You are! Just let them go!

-

Darcy: *Putting Ivan Oogie in a headlock* I'll ask ya one more time, ya ant-stuffed potato sack! Who's the true scare master! HUH?!

Ivan Oogie: *Screaming* YOUR DAD!

Darcy: Yeah, that's right, he is! Don't YOU forget it!

-

Doctor Cabello: I've gotta say, sugar, your taste in fashion is impeccable.

Celia: Hey, you're not so bad yourself. Your shadow's got some spunk to it, though. But, I've gotta know, why are you dating that holy roller?

Doctor Cabello: I like to see him get all worked up whenever I "sin."

Celia: Okay, valid.

-

Zoé: You, uh... You really live up to your name.

Chad: What's that supposed to mean?

Zoé: Oh, nothing.

-

Carlos: JAY! HIDE ME! *Hides behind Jay while he's talking to Jafadrien*

Jafadrien: Wow. Rude much?

Jay: Bud, what's going on?

Carlos: I'm being chased by an evil, malevolent creature!

Jafadrien: *Looks to where he's pointing* That'sss jussst Mari. And she'sss more sssadissstic than malevolent, but you're on the right track.

Jay: Whoa, she looks like your mom.

Carlos: That's why I'm running!

-

Fairy GodBro: So, you're this world's version of me.

Fairy GodMother: You bippidi boppidi better believe it!

Fairy GodBro: Oh my gosh! You do that too?! Does it annoy everyone else?

Fairy GodMother: It's why I keep saying it.

Fairy GodBro: Oh, you and I are gonna have some fun.

@imsparky2002 @msweebyness

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous #class of heroes #class of villainy #mlb ocs #mlb au #mirrorverse #answered ask #ask me stuff #descendants

[breadvidence]

'72 part II in detail, part 1. My overall feelings are still "hmmm", but now they are "hmmm" backed with line-by-line film analysis. I'd emphasize that this adaptation accomplishes a lot that's interesting and fresh, and you can dig in to it critically in a way that would collapse a film like '52 or '98. Ultimately it fails for me as a whole, but not without me being glad to have the pieces in hand that are good.

Julien Verdier plays the best Mabeuf, which—well—just because the competition isn't brisk doesn't mean you didn't win it, right? We open part II with a little speech of his that if I'm not mistaken (correct me if I'm wrong!) does not come from the Brick, but is a bit of freewheeling on the adaptation's part. Given the placement, it seems significant, and the temptation to boil it down into some straightforward political sentiment is strong, given the series' overall sense of politicalness. Eventually this man's degradation (his priceless books being made cheap by the necessity of their sale to literal goods) makes him a revolutionary of sorts, if a very wobbly and incoherent one—some counterpoint, a complication, maybe, to the fact that poverty in this story otherwise leads to crime? Not sure.

Thénardier continues to have far more status in '72 than in the Brick or other adaptations. The musical master of the house wishes. You see, the narrator takes us on a breakneck adaptation of III.VII: we open with III.VII.I "Il y a sous la construction sociale, cette merveille compliquée d'une masure—" and skip mid-breath to III.VII.II "—et il y aura, tant que l'ignorance ne sera pas dissipée, la grande caverne du mal," it is a charge through a very dense section of novel, and these are as far as I can be fucked to pick out all direct quotes until we get to the very end: "Avoir faim, avoir soif, c'est le point de départ; être—" Well, in the novel, Satan. In '72? "—Thénardier, c'est l'arrivée." The camera zooms in on Alain Mottet's best quivery stare; his beard is very bad. I am of several minds: on the one hand, if you don't know the original sentence culminates in Satan, you wouldn't think it's odd to find Thénardier, and it's perfectly possible the script writer was only thinking, I've got these badass lines but I really need my tv series to be a little more concrete than Hugolian, and Alain Mottet is more concrete than the Father of Lies. On the other hand: perhaps they're saying that the original text sees the outcome of all this to be the Catholic concept that is Satan, but they see it to be the concrete harmful/harmed individual human. Or, on a foot: '72 Thénardier is the fucking Devil. Whatever the case may be, in the Brick Thénardier does not even appear in III.VII—Hugo is talking about Patron Minette, and he's not a member. Given Thénardier's importance to this series, I don't mind this change at all.

After this really significant and interesting alteration to its source text '72 proceeds to decide Brujon is now a fifth main player in PM. lol, ok.

Nicole Jamet looks stoned off her gourd this entire series, with an expressive range from numbly dull to a ghastly blank smile. I hunted down clips of her in La piovra to see if this is her acting style overall, and while she's a little flat there as well, it's more in the line of being afraid to show a wrinkle and less whatever's happening in Les Misérables. Since it's paired with Georges Géret's Valiumjean I derive this is a directorial choice. It's our luck she only appears in, generously, 20 minutes of part II. I don't think I've ever wanted less Cosette in a LM adaptation, but she's such an unpleasant take on the character that I'd rather simply not.

I re-read IV.V.VI to see whether my harsh judgment of Nicole Jamet's performance in this scene was unfair—maybe Hugo also described Cosette as baked, I've been wrong before, and I won't blame an adaptation for fidelity. But, nah. Jamet more or less stands and stares, a little head shake here, a little lips parting there. In the novel, while we aren't given as much of Cosette's interiority as Marius' (thanks, Hugo) and we don't hear her voice at all as much (THANKS, Hugo), we see her first caught between two impulses: "Cosette, though ready to swoon, uttered no cry. She retreated slowly, for she felt herself attracted." and then a point of drama, "And she sank down as though on the point of death." I'm not saying you have to be howling and flailing your way through it, but c'mon, there's life to be found in this moment, and Jamet is a stiff. There is the issue that Marius monologues and we have zero idea in the novel of Cosette's actions during this time—a challenge, yes; one the film doesn't meet.

Now I'm being a petty bitch, but I don't like that they changed the exchange from "Vous m'aimez donc?" "Tais-toi! tu le sais!" to "Et vous, est-ce que vous m'aimez?" "Je t'aime." Please, let someone tell Marius "tais-toi". (To be clear, I think it unfair to expect an adaptation to completely follow the source text. but. y'know. If you're going to have this many direct quotes, maybe don't put in bland substitutions where your deeply invested viewership will notice them.)

Great adaptation of Gavroche and the mômes in this. The whole exchange around "monsieur, pourquoi vous avez pas un chat?" "j'en avais un, mais les souris l'ont mangé" kills me, it hits the pitch perfectly of the combined humor and horror of the situation.

In continued "Thénardier is the main character of '72" news, the scene in which he's saved from the top of the wall takes about four minutes—about a minute and a half more screentime than Marius and Cosette's first love confession. Not to get into the nitty-gritty of what this series cares about, or anything.

By the by, Claquesous rather than Montparnasse comes to fetch Gavroche, a small change that I suppose is irrelevant overall when the series doesn't have the time to draw the Montparnasse-as-future-Gavroche connection anyway, but which falls into this pattern '72 has of odd small alterations to Patron Minette.

Hermine Karagheuz's performance is uneven overall, in my opinion, but I could watch on a loop as she replies to Thénardier's "Faut bien qu'on vive, tout de même" with a raspy "Crevez". Having driven off the would-be thieves, she takes a few shuddering breaths, she collapses back against the gates with a gagging exhalation, she looks like she's going to be sick. Is it dramatic? Hell, yes. I'm into it.

We cut to Jamet, who cannot even fake weep.

I feel awkward that I've got nothing meaningful to say as we swing into revolution mode even though this is an essential pivot point in the series. Shrug emoji.

I have a very bad ear for French but one of the terms I can pick out reliably is now "mouchard". Thanks, Javert. I got nothin' deep to say still as he is uncovered at the barricade, but I did laugh when the revolutionaries steal his hat in the process of searching him. Did they think he was hiding something up there? Better check in his whiskers next.

This adaptation really suffers from the lack of Le Cabuc.

On my initial watch of this series the poetry recital wrecked my shit, here we have one man say "Do you remember our sweet life, when we were so young, we two, and we had in our hearts no other desire than to be well-dressed, and to be in love," another responds "We... We lived hidden away"———the combination of the stutter and the furtiveness, y'all, I did a double take, I knew fandom would've alerted me if there was explicit homosexuality in this, and still I had a moment when I thought I saw the ripples in a waving rainbow flag.

They pull directly from Hugo's aside about civil war in IV.XIII.III for Enjolras' speech—I'm not sure how often '72 actually puts narration into characters' mouths rather than into the narrator's, now that I think about it (would have to re-rewatch which isn't going to happen anytime soon). This is interesting to me; we have here a character who makes several speeches, all pertinent to the politics of revolution, and yet instead the show decides to have him recite—a passage which occurs in the inglorious context of Marius justifying to himself that he is fine to shed French blood when his father shed that of foreigners.

I'll come back for the final thirty minutes another time—that's enough for now.

#les misérables 1972 #les mis

[descendantofthesparrow]

Not so abandoned manor - Harry Hook x reader - Halloween one-shot

inspired by the invitation~!! also less of an x reader and more of a “has reader character in it and Harry clearly has a bond with them” lol

=

This was stupid, this was so fucking stupid; why was he doing this?!

Chad had dared him, that’s why. Stupid fucking prince Chad Charming. Harry swallowed harshly, spinning on his heel as he trekked through the dark forest that surrounded him; autumn leaves crunching beneath his feet as shadows danced behind his back-the moon being his only other light.

Harry let out a shaky breath as he broke through the forest line-coming upon the abandoned manor that sat deep within the Whitby forest. There had been rumors of a monster within its walls; with gleaming red eyes and fangs of a beast. Back on the isle, he would’ve been one of the first to storm the abandoned white and black stone walls-but in Auradon; he wasn’t as keen.

Considering in Auradon, death was much more…permanent.

Harry must’ve stood at that forest line for a solid hour, staring hard at the foliage and dust-covered manor, not a light to be seen from the window, nor a life wandering the grounds. It had been abandoned for years, built in the 1800s, and collecting dust since the 1980s.

“New Carfax abbey” Harry muttered to himself as he read the faded sign that sat on the pathway toward the manor. He took a deep breath, clutching his hook in his left hand with the flashlight held strong in his right; his phone sitting fully charged in his pocket-ready to text Uma and or Mal to get him out of there-just In case.

They had all grown up in a place where monsters reigned supreme, so the rumors here-could hold all too much truth for kids like them. Harry slowly walked up the gravel pathway, furrowing his brows as he got closer to the manor, seeing what looked to be scorch marks upon the white stone, buried underneath vines and natural decay.

“oookay” he muttered, taking one final glance around him, his hook still tight in his hand; before he made his way to the grand front doors, pushing them open with his shoulder with great difficulty. One was nearly off its hinges and the other had clearly gone too long without some oil.

He jumped at the sound of snapping twigs and crunching leaves behind him, he whirled around, pointing the flashlight in the general direction he had heard the noise come from.

He saw nothing, nothing but the shadow of trees, and a fox. The fox spotted him and froze, but it almost looked like it wasn’t looking at him, but over his shoulder. He learned a long time ago, that animals didn’t just-look at random things. Harry whirled around again, seeing nothing within the void that was the main hall. Harry took a deep breath, carefully stepping further into the manor, his flashlight scanning back and forth until the feeling of being watched faded away.

“fuck this, fuck this, fuhuhuhuck this~” Harry sang to the tune of that one Mozart song to relax his nerves, which were going through the roof. “this is stupid, this is so fucking stupid-I'm going to fucking kill Chad” Harry continued to try to calm himself down as he walked further into the main hall, his eyes catching onto a cobweb-infested statue that depicted a dragon overtaking a knight-a stone spear pointing directly at him “not creepy at all” Harry grumbled, seeing the long-rested ash resting upon the curves of the statue.

And well-everything else. It almost looked as if the place was set ablaze, and then was-magically put back together-because the only burn damage was ash and the scorch marks from outside. Harry turned, pointing his flashlight into a dark corner of the room, furrowing his brows at the stone hallway; it looked old-very old. He leaned to the side, licking his lips; as the feeling of being watched suddenly returned.

“nope,” he muttered, turning away and jogging up the stairs, nearly breaking into a sprint as it felt like something followed him from that stone hallway. He quickly turned, holding his hook defensively as he pressed his back against the wall; pointing the flashlight every which way. “is-is anyone there?” Harry called out, nothing answered, but he heard the flutter of feathered wings as his voice spooked a bird.

He hated this-he absolutely fucking hated this. He wanted to go home-he wanted to fucking run. You know what, he wanted his sister! He genuinely wanted his big sister, he felt like a scared little kid again. He jumped as his phone buzzed against his thigh and he fumbled to take it out, sliding his hook into his belt loop as he did so. He huffed the text he got.

‘prince asshole-

Remember, no leaving until you get a picture of that chapel’

Right, the stupid rumored chapel of the abandoned manor. Apparently, the place used to be owned by some lord of whatever-and he was into weird shit-like demonic weird shit-holding blood ceremonies in a hidden chapel within his manor.

And if that wasn't a recipe for a horror movie? Harry didn’t know what was.

Harry turned, seeing a hallway to his left, and another to his right. He took the left first, ending up down another hallway that just led to a set of bedrooms. “Alexander suite” he muttered, shining his light onto the rusted gold plate. He opened the once lavish door, slowly creeping inside the dark room. He took a deep breath, this room felt much less-heavy-then the rest of the manor.

The moonlight easily illuminated the room, making it much easier to see. He closed the door behind him; he didn’t like his back to the void that was the rest of the manor. It wasn’t a gigantic bedroom, nothing compared to bens, but it was a good size; his eyes glazed over a set of Russian dolls, all painted white yet cracked with age. He ran his fingers over the painted wood before his eyes met his own, a cracked mirror sitting atop the dresser he now stood in front of; the four-poster bed and windows behind his shoulder. 

He hummed, furrowing his brows as he saw…a shadow, a human figure; standing just behind the flowing curtains. He slowly drew a pocket knife from his pocket, flipping it open and skillfully throwing it at the shadow-swallowing as it landed in nothing but wood and fabric.

He quickly stalked over, ripping the knife out and pushing away the curtains, that feeling of being watched returning heavily. “I swear to the gods if this place is fucking haunted” Harry grumbled to himself, flinging the curtains away and turning; screaming as a pair of red gleaming eyes met his. He fell on his butt, holding his hand to his chest as the sudden figure burst into laughter, stepping into the moonlight to reveal-

-you.

“You should’ve seen your faaace~” you laughed, kneeling in front of him and taking his face, his cheeks ice cold but warming with the flush that was appearing. “(y/n)!” Harry snapped, his breathing rapid and heavy as he glared at you, pouting as you continued to laugh “ye scared tha’ hell outta me!!”

You just scrunched your nose at him, taking his hands and helping him up, grabbing his flashlight and knife while you were at it-Harry having dropped them in his fright “kinda the point baby blue,” he flushed at your stupid old nickname for him, you meant with absolute fondness, but it didn’t mean he didn’t find it a bit-embarrassing. You didn’t use it around anyone other than him thankfully. “What’cha doin’ in a place like this anyway?” you just watched him pout as he pocketed his knife and grabbed his hook from his belt “Ah, Chad?”

Harry nodded once, walking over to the door, and glancing at the painting that sat on the wall next to it, it felt….odd-for some reason. Like It was watching him, no-warning him; telling him to leave. He brushed off the feeling; opening the door and walking out, huffing as he stepped back into the void of the manor, turning the flashlight back on, and walking back down the hall-this time; with you at his back.

Which honestly, made him feel a lot better-because who better to roam an abandoned manor with-than a vampire? Who was the descendant of Blackbeard no less. He froze as something ducked behind the corner, the floor beneath it creaking. He reached back, grabbing your gloved hand. “Harry?” you asked quietly, you knew he wasn’t a fan of places like this-even back on the isle. But something was setting him off.

“Shadow, saw it with the flashlight,” Harry muttered, bringing you towards him till you were practically against his back, your chin resting on his shoulder. “Floor creaked too.”

You furrowed your brows, you didn’t hear anything, and your hearing and sight were 12x better than the average human, you could see near perfectly in complete darkness and hear whispers through walls. And you heard nothing from the floor except your footsteps. You didn’t tell this to Harry though, you would not send him into an episode.

So you squeezed his hand instead, following him down the hall and around the corner, his shoulders dropping a bit as you saw nothing but old carpet and an empty hallway. Harry sighed, shaking his head “I swear,” he muttered, ending the sentence there as you both continued down the hall; passing by a small kitchen, several bedrooms; and entering a very big bedroom, clearly the master bedroom.

“Wow” you muttered, closing the door behind you and spinning on your heel to get a good look at the dark-colored room; the darkness of the night nearly blending in with the walls. The sheer curtains flowed with the wind that came from the shattered windows, the moon barely illuminating the large four poster bed-the sheets stripped and a large dark blanket lay decaying on the floor.

“(y/n)?” Harry called out to you, voice meek and-scared. You hummed, turning to look at him, seeing him locking eyes with a faded portrait of a man…a man who looked-all too much like him. “Harry?” you whispered back, walking up to him and taking his arm; squeezing it as he keep staring at the portrait. Their eyes matched, that ocean blue; one painted and the other pinpointed in fear.

“let’s find that fucking chapel and get out of here” Harry snapped, taking your hand and nearly storming out of the room, the shadows that danced around his feet and back almost coming to life as he raced through the halls-just wanting to leave already.

“Please tell me you’re hearing and seeing things too” Harry muttered as he came to a sudden stop, the two of you finally on the ground floor once more; standing in the middle of the main hall. You glanced up at him; then shook your head. To you, this place was just an abandoned manor, not a lick of supernatural to be seen or heard-other than that portrait. Harry sighed, rubbing his eyes; his brain was fucking with him. which wasn’t uncommon, he had a plethora of mental issues that made him hallucinate in many ways; tonight seemed to be audible and visual.

He had seen shadows, heard creaks of wood, eyes flashing in the dark, whispers in the back of his mind, dark chuckling, and sets of claws retreating from corners. He was going to fucking lose it, and he needed to get out of this stupid fucking manor before he had an episode. “It’s a hidden chapel right?” you asked, pointing his flashlight towards the stone hallway Harry had noticed upon his entry. Harry hummed, nodding a bit as he tried to ground himself in reality. “Then it's probably going to be through that-like-through servants' quarters, something only those who live here can access easily.”

Harry blinked, well-if anything-it wouldn’t hurt to look. “let’s go, if it’s not there, I’m going to hang Chad by his thong” Harry muttered, grabbing your shoulder and tugging you into his side, keeping you close (mostly for himself) as you ventured into the stone hallway. It was long, damp, and just-so creepy. But it wasn’t for naught, because at the end of the tunnel, and to the right-was the chapel.

It was covered in scorch marks and ash, the pews cracked and near destroyed from fire damage, the stone roof practically a void of soot. “Well, we found it” you muttered as Harry snapped a picture with his phone, happy to be done with it all. “let’s go baby blue” Harry grumbled at the nickname and went to follow you out; but paused, his eyes locked onto the alter. “Harry? Harry come on, your brain is playing…tricks…on you” your voice fell into a whisper, Harry’s hand reaching back to grab your arm as you both stared into the reflective eyes within the darkness that was the alter-buried in wood and ash.

Whatever it was-chittered like a wild animal, a clawed hand slowly reaching out to push itself out. It hissed and Harry screamed, chucking his flashlight so hard it cracked on impact-the impact being the beings nose and forehead. It grunted in pain and fell back, giving you and Harry enough time to turn on your heels and run for it; Harry’s hand never leaving yours as you heard something-two somethings-chasing after you, both snarling and chittering like feral animals.

“Go go go!” you yelled, shoving Harry forward and swinging around; your eyes gleaming in the dark as they met three sets of reflective eyes. Vampires, not of your “updated” kind, but of the old word.

And one looked too much like Harry to be comfortable. You snarled, taking your pistol, your real loaded one and not your prop one Ben made you get; and shot point blank, the one with long dark hair screeching in pain as it went right through their forehead and they dropped. You drew your short sword and sliced at the shortest one, its black blood dripping from your blade as the third one, the Harry imposter, met your fist.

It flew back, crashing into a support beam as you turned and ran; meeting Harry outside and grabbing his hand “Run, gogogogogo!” you rambled quickly, the two of you disappearing into the forest as the three beings stayed within the ‘abandoned’ manor; all staring after the pirate teen who looked very much like the master of the house.

The imposter smirked, his eyes flashing in the dark.

-

“Sooo how was-oh shit what happened?” Chad’s smug smirk dropped at seeing the two of you; completely rattled. Uma leaped up to check on Harry, his eyes far off and flickering to red. “vampires” you answered breathlessly “and-not me, vampires, the old kind-the dangerous kind.” Chad went pale, vampires had always been a rumor about that manor-but he never expected them to be-well, real. Since all the vampires of the last few decades were sent to the isle. But apparently, not all of them had.

“Please tell me ye didn’t dare anyone else ta’ go there” Harry whispered, his hands clutching onto Uma’s as she calmed him down. Chad shook his head, for once; telling the truth. “Good. Dare me ta’ do anything like tha’ again, and I will strangle yeh.” Chad swallowed harshly and nodded; very much knowing Harry wasn’t joking-not after something like that.

“Are you both okay?” Evie asked, holding out two caramel apples, the caramel still soft but not dripping. You both took them eagerly, needing some sugar in your bodies after the insane adrenaline rush. “yeah, Harry threw his flashlight at one, I think he broke its nose” you chuckled, and Harry finally smiled, quiet laughter coming from his throat “and then I shot one, got another with my sword, and got the first one in the face with my first-yes there was three. And I swear to the gods, if anyone goes there to try to prove us wrong, im not saving anyone's ass.”

Everyone nodded, and very soon-word had spread about the encounter- the people of Auradon were warned to NOT go to the manor. Some tried, even with the deadly warnings from Uma and Mal, but were thwarted with a magical barrier; put up by FG herself to protect those stupid enough to try to go to the manor anyway.

Only glimpses were seen then, of three figures, one looking all too much like one; Harrison James Hook.

-end-

ye, the other fic i was writing for Halloween took me forever to get past a page-and yet this flows out in like-a day n a half-i really do still love Harry, but its not as easy to write for him anymore :c 

anyways, permtaglist!

@queer-cosette @sephiralorange @lunanight2012

@daughter-of-the-stars11 @musicarose @rintheemolion

@random-thoughts-004 @anythingbutmar​ @dai-tsukki-desu​

@imtryingthisout​ @remembered-license​ @thecaptainsgingersnap​

@thetrueghostqueen​ @littlewierdalien​ 

#harry hook descendants #disney descendants #the invitation #harry hook x reader #vamp reader #descendant of blackbeard reader #reader ages but gets all the cool powers n shiz #so like-more half human than vampire #harry has hella mental isses #one of which is hallucinations #schizophrenia

[thewingedwolf]

i am rewatching shadow & bone bc, once again, i am a parody of myself, and i really am so fond of Mal in the show, i am deeply nervous about how he’ll be written in s2 lol. not as nervous about almost everyone else - i say ALMOST bc i was not impressed with the way Jesper & Nina weren’t shown to be bisexual, like, at all, & while i think it was just clumsy writing & not malice (the same as the clumsy way they wrote Alina’s race), that doesn’t mean it’ll get better lol. also pls understand i spend half my time shitting on the darklng, ben barnes does an excellent job reminding me why i hate that bitch okayyyy

Mal already knows that Alina’s tent with the other cartographers was moved, and knows where it moved. We first see him fighting but seems like he got there, immediately attempted to find Alina, figured out she had been moved and was wandering around, then said fuck it she’ll find me or i’ll find out she got thrown in lock up again, and decided to go beat someone up so he could show off his kruge in front of her lmao

Alina is interested in the grisha. she’s smiling and curious, clearly thinks Zoya looks cool af (she’s right, Zoya is cool af). Mal spends the entire time frowning at them lol. Could be bc a grisha just crashed his party, could be mal’s general dislike of grisha and the upper class. it’s very funny either way that he just Refuses to smile until Alina distracts him

Alina experiencing A Racism but still thinking quick enough so her team can eat makes me emo but also Mal immediately being like “time to commit some crimes” every single time someone is racist to Alina is so great, get u a real man like Mal

Racism is done very messily in the show and i’m hoping it improves bc like - Zoya is insulated from most racism due to her status, but we still get that comment about “YOU from Novokribirsk?” comment from another Grisha, which seemed like a pretty obvious slight at her being Suli. Alina experiences racism everywhere she goes from nearly everyone she meets - random cooks, cartographers, servants, Zoya, and the Darkling himself. Even Genya sort of brushes off the comment about her eyes as like, typical bullying and not something very different & much more insidious. Mal looks uncomfortable at the anti Shu Han propaganda & I think that’s it? Which feels weird bc he doesn’t have the class protection Zoya has, but maybe he doesn’t *look Suli* culturally the way Zoya and Inej clearly do. Or are Mal AND Alina both supposed to be Shu Han? We know from Inej and Nina (and maybe Zoya, idk, i never read king of scars bc i would have to acknowledge Matthias & David’s deaths and I refuse) that the Suli are still mistreated on a legal level in addition to social, but are maybe treated marginally better than the Shu that live in Ravka, bc Ravka is in an active war against Shu Han. Is that the difference in what Mal experienced vs what Alina does? lol or i’m overthinking something that clearly wasn’t thought out very well before they put it in the show. I just like. Do Not think Mal is meant to be a white Ravkan, firstly bc Archie isn’t a white brit, and secondly because - look at him aksjdjd that is not a man that can really pass for white. I hope they handle Alina’s background better, especially since she’ll be interacting with other Shu characters, in s2 but i also want an explanation for Mal’s background!!!

I do think it’s funny that the sickness grisha get if they don’t use their powers is very informed in the show. Mal makes a few comments about Alina being sick all the time but she doesn’t actually look or act sick at any point in the show aksksk

Mal is so strong, like the dude is fuckin ripped, a fucking volcra tries to rip Alina away and he’s just like “yeah i can take this bitch with one hand” aksjsj

I feel bad for that lil blond boy that clearly has a thing for Alina lmao he really tries to stick up for her and she does not even notice a little bit and then he dies bc West Ravka is like “anyways don’t get captured even tho we’re at war with half the world and you have no resources, crew, or family over here” ya, they’re way better than Old Ravka smh (Zlatan is just as big of a bitch as the king and darklng dammit)

Interesting that Zoya only gets shitty with Alina after both the Darklng & Mal clearly choose her over Zoya. Mal she probably doesn’t gaf about, but it definitely stung her pride that she can’t even pull an orphan from Keramzin but Alina can. Before that tho, even if she’s thrown by Alina, she clearly sees Alina as One Of Us. She even looks visibly annoyed when everyone starts laughing at Alina and her “i’m a mapmaker” response & seems to pick up on the implied racism of the “what are you” question. It’s an annoying response that after being rejected, Zoya uses that racism against Alina to put her in her place but like…I guess it’s not wildly ooc? bleh.

Ivan and Fedyor purposefully ignoring the Shu Of It All when talking about power and privilege is 100% why Alina takes so long to trust the grisha, and so easily turns against the Darklng imo. For all they understand the danger of being Grisha, for all Ivan wants to lecture Alina about her privilege at dinner, none of them even bother to understand what it’s like now, right now, for the poor of Ravka. You serve in the army & let the Darklng indoctrinate you with his nonsense, or you flee like the mother in the first episode does, taking your chances with the slavers & the volcra & the Fjerdans. There are no good choices for the grisha, no good choices for the non grisha peasantry, and Alina’s entire existence, from the never ending racism she experiences, to the death and starvation she’s surrounded by, is a constant reminder how few choices that exist no matter if you’re grisha or not.

So like, most of the bad guys have Weird Foreign Accents and I dislike it. All the Ravkans should have Russian accents but it’s only Fedyor & a few mean servants that do. The Fjerdans all have accents. Pekka has an accent. Everyone else is just a brit, including people in Kerch, even tho they don’t even speak the same language as the Ravkans do, they speak Kerch! Why does Kaz not have some country bumpkin accent dammit

“When our closest friend is in trouble, we do foolish things.” Smash cut to Kaz doing the Dumbest shit in an attempt to protect Inej from Heleen l m a o it’s not one whipped bitch in this show it’s two (it’s three actually, Matthias just hasn’t shown up yet lmao)

When Mal & Alina are both envisioning each other & reach out to hold the others’ hand, hundreds of miles away but desperate for comfort, THAT was the moment i fell for them. Archie & Jessie are just so Powerful okay aksjdjd

feels more obvious in retrospect that he’s not trying to train her to do anything but answer to him. he doesn’t even bother preparing her for the king bc he knows he can amplify her powers, so long as she’s not fighting him.

I do not buy Baghra’s insistence that Alina’s feelings for Mal hold her back. She’s able to summon her powers when she’s angry, and Baghra takes that short cut by continuously pissing Alina off. But Alina also uses her powers whenever she thinks of protecting Mal; she protects him on the skiff & when she remembers trying to run away with him for protection, she can summon a bit of her power. It’s Alina’s compassion that gives her abilities, but Baghra has spent so much time nurturing her own bitterness, watching her son nurture his anger, it just never occurs to her that Alina’s strength comes from her desire to protect the people she loves. Alina goes from wanting solely to protect Mal to channeling her power through her anger and rejection & Baghra treats it like a win but it’s just another shortcut that clearly makes her more susceptible to the Darklng whispering in her ear, not less, and if Baghra had any goddamn sense, she would have seen that she was making her son’s job easier. But like, the darklng didn’t just come out of nowhere lmao, and you can clearly see where he gets his defeatist, manipulative, and bleak ass outlook on life from.

As a certified Matthias stan still refusing to acknowledge the end of crooked kingdom, i think it is genuinely so funny that Mal gets chest wound after gut wound after chest wound in s1 and shrugs it off, but Matthias gets shot one (1) time and dies immediately & cannot be saved by the most powerful heartrender that ever lived. leigh PLS

“you are my true north and i can see my way to you now” IM JUST.

Genya has to hurt Alina’s feelings by lying about Mal, then immediately and smoothly changes the subject to something that will make Alina laugh. She knows she has to betray Alina and she tries her hardest to soften the blow, encourages Alina to return to the blue kefta instead of going too hard towards the Darkling so she has the protection of a color and a people, warns her as best as she can to be wary of the Darklng, even while she’s helping isolate Alina from anyone who could help her escape. i’m so depressed about Genya.

Enter David and Genya loses her damn mind ansjsjdjdjd Alina is doing miracle sun summoning and Genya just watches David the whole time, who probably cannot fucking believe his luck that his weird ass boss for ONCE is letting him hang out with the meanest, coolest, smartest person in the palace instead of Ivan & Fedyor, who spend all their time flirting with each other and bullying him

Fjerda is lichrally trying to commit genocide against the grisha & Shu Han does…some jacked up shit to their grisha lol, and i did a whole post about how the Darklng is just more of the same, but so is Baghra. All their talk of looking out for Grisha, but they both treat the peasantry of Ravka as disposable. Nikolai is theeeee only valid ruler specifically bc he does think of the cost to the peasantry & to the grisha before he makes decisions (something his father and his brother also don’t do lol). And both Baghra & Aleksander allow this “us vs them” bs to permeate through their own people - no grisha healers help the first army, and Ivan reads the dead but glosses over the Otkazat'sya deaths to focus on the grisha. but this is on purpose - if you make the grisha other the Otkazat'sya, you can easily turn them against one another. neither baghra nor aleksander ever work towards like, actual freedom for the grisha by building bridges and relationships between the grisha and the Otkazat'sya, they just turn the grisha into weird, insular child soldiers.

Alina realizing she can just swing on the racists now love that for her

Mal tends to deal with his feelings for Alina bubbling to the surface by purposefully breaking the tension; closing his eyes & going to sleep when they’re thrown in the brig, cracking a joke about going to Ketterdam when he steals her food. But their convo in the woods after they’re reunited is the first time he doesn’t try it - you can almost see he wants to, when she says she cheated on the grisha test bc she didn’t want to leave him, his whole brain short circuits at what it could mean, and it’s a moment where he might have purposefully broken the tension but instead he takes a minute to think before he tries to open up abiut his own feelings - only to get derailed & heartbroken by the realization that the stag drawing wasn’t Alina trying to communicate with him, but Aleksander manipulating & isolating her. But he still doesn’t break the tension - he lets Alina hold him, and he holds her in return, & stops running from his feelings for real this time.

I do find it so funny how Aleksander sees David raising his hand to speak, initially starts to tell him to knock it off, and then realizes David will not understand why Ivan and him find it annoying & just decides to choose his battles aksjjdjd.

Also, him going through the five stages of grief when he realizes Mal & Alina are together, and overdramtigcally monologuing about the orphans of Keramzin being reunited to this random dude who has no idea wtf he’s talking about. Perfect, no notes.

Episode 7 is just very well written. All the conversations are tense, all the action is painful, all the acting is amazing. From David half in tears as he helps enslave Alina, all the anger going out of Alina when she realizes the king was raping Genya, Genya’s guilt & shame over her own hand in betraying Alina stopping her from talking even though she’s usually so composed, Mal’s helpless snarl when he says Aleksander will wish he’d killed him, even Aleksander’s inability to look Alina in the eyes because he knows she’s right to hate him it’s just that he thinks she’s a justifiable sacrifice. Meanwhile the Crows are being the most chaotic idiots ALIVE akskdkdk just perfect, excellent writing.

What i think is interesting is that Alina makes the hypocrisy argument to Genya, and it works. Genya appeals to Alina’s compassion when she admits the king has been raping her, but Alina pieces together that Aleksander placed her in front of the king to begin with. Not a soldier, just a pawn. And Genya is so struck by this argument she has no counter; she just leaves in tears. Alina tries this with Aleksander as well, to get him to see the hypocrisy in his actions - of killing the king because the king is a monster, yet using the fold as a weapon. It has the complete opposite effect because whereas Genya is aware on some level that she’s being used, Aleksander is so far removed from his own experiences as a pawn, as a target, he can’t see her point.

“all countries will answer to us. for who would oppose us now?”

means Something to me that Immediately after that nasty comment from that heartrender, Zoya sees another Suli girl (who, if we remember, someone she is friends with just called Suli trash before getting got by said Suli girl) who is about to be killed, witnesses the destruction of her home and what she will find is the death of the only person who ever loved her as a child, and makes the decision to betray the only stability she’s ever known for the glimmer of hope that Alina can offer her.

It’s also exactly what I mean when I say I hope we get an explanation for Mal’s background. In Inej’s chapters we get the sense that the Suli are a people that draw close together, even outside Ravka. Her curse on Bajan clearly hits him hard; even clearly trying to assimilate into Kerch culture, the thought that his Suli ancestors may forsake him for harming a fellow Suli really gets under his skin. So in the show, what I love is we get a small exploration of this bond that exists between all Suli as outsiders in their home countries - Zoya and Inej instinctively working together, Recognizing that bond in each other, with Inej even attempting to stop Zoya from going back to the ruins of the city, of wanting Zoya to stay with them. And Zoya, despite her pained history with her own people, despite her comments about Alina being [redacted], clearly returns those feelings. She’s so much warmer with Inej, and vice verse, then say, Jesper is with Mal (he’s not cold to Mal, he’s just Typical Jesper). The thing is - maybe you could argue Zoya and Mal kind of take a small interest in each other because they recognize the other is Suli, but Inej and Mal don’t really have that connection in the time they know each other, and Zoya and Mal are much more cordial with each other than Zoya and Inej are. OBVIOUSLY there are other factors at play. But. Whereas we get a hint of Zoya’s own complicated past, and Inej is defined by her ties to her culture, Mal doesn’t really show any of this beyond one single uncomfortable look at a Shu Han propaganda poster, and that’s likely more to do with Alina than his own background. I JUST THINK ITS WEIRD AND CLUMSY OKAY.

idek what to say about Alina’s amazing speech besides HELL YEAH THATS MY WIFE. she’s so fucking cool.

Ivan’s lil bitch ass being like “know your place” RIGHT AFTER Alina gives her “you asked WHAT I am” speech and then Jesper being like “i think the fuck not” and tossing him overboard. absolutely perfect i love that man.

Zoya looks so uncomfortable during the whole conversation by the fire. For the first time, she’s the outsider - the lone splash of color against the browns and blacks of the crows and malina. But when Zoya says she has to go back, Inej shoots up to stop her, and even Kaz attempts to dissuade her from what he thinks is no better than a suicide run. Since her childhood, Zoya has seemed alone, but just as her aunt stepped in to save her then, and the crows attempt to console her now, Zoya is never as alone as she feels.

And neither is Alina! Knowing where their stories end up going, i think it is interesting that both Zoya and Alina are very adaptable and very adept at making very loyal friends. Despite all the odds against them, with them being Suli and Shu, with Zoya being a huge bitch (which I love) and Alina constantly struggling with her own self worth, other people see just how amazing the two of them are and are willing to fight for them, with them, to be near them. Sankta Alina and the Grisha Queen. Wonderful.

#shadow and bone #grishaverse #rani's liveblogging tag #anti darkling #ben barnes is a magnificent actor who imbues a lot of depth into a character that is a textbook abuser & i love him. aleksander can choke. #i’m in mobile so i can’t put it under a cut i’ll do that later probably #rani attempts meta #there’s a lil meta here so it’s going in that tag #if u want to comment u can. u can even disagree but if ur a bitch about it i will be a bitch back

[antimony-medusa]

How TommyInnit Went Viral In A Snowstorm

Ice rasped across the front windows of the McDonalds, just audible over the radio Tubbo had cruelly set to hip-hop with the argument “I’m the supervisor, fuck you, go clean”. Visibility from the storm was so bad he only saw the edge of the parking lot in snatches. Tommy leaned on the counter and watched the swooping patterns made by the snow illuminated in the streetlights.

“Not getting any better out there?” Ranboo said, coming out of the entrance to the kitchen and leaning on the head-lamp-lit delivery station. He put his elbow on hot metal and snatched it back, hissing.  

“It’s getting fucking ah-bys-mal out there,” Tommy said, draping himself over the counter in an attempt to stretch out his back. “I haven’t even seen any plows for like, a year.” His headset chimed and Tommy straightened like he’d been shocked. “Welcome to McDonalds, may I take your order?”

There was no response from the speaker. Tommy and Ranboo looked at the drive-thru monitor, which showed an empty order lane nearly full of drifting snow.

“Probably the wind,” Ranboo said unnecessarily.

“Fuck you, bitch,” Tommy said, going back to leaning over the counter again.

Status: complete, updated 22 July, 6,687 words

Fandom: Dream SMP

Characters: TommyInnit, Tubbo, Ranboo, Philza, Wilbur Soot, Technoblade

Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Minimum Wage, Snowed In, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, this is just silliness, Several years of minimum wage food service went into this, but no I have never been snowed in at work before, This is unrepentantly Canadian, sorry about that, TommyInnit-centric (Video Blogging RPF), Tommyinnit-Typical levels of swearing

__

Here is my gift for @whatsitzface as a part of @mcytblraufest!

I hope you enjoy my attempt at SBI, Bechtrio, and—well it isn’t a coffee shop, but minimum wage work is pretty similar, right? :D

#My writing #tommyinnit

[edgygayguy]

Ok since you're apparently tall asf (and consider me envious I WISH I could reach my highest kitchen cabinets without a stepping stool) how tall is the ideal trump card? Is 7ft enough height difference or does the werewolf need to be on stilts? 🤣

Also while I'm here, got any favorite HCs for Hans and Pip you'd want to share?

Thank you for the ask!

No need for the envy, I may be able to reach far but scoliosis, chronic backpain and shoulder bones that pop as loud as a faraway gunshot is the price I pay xD

7ft is definitely enough, but 7.22ft (pardon my European ass using Google to convert this 😭) would be like, perfection. I'm a smol bean in the body of a enlarged Fran Lebowitz, I want a giant fucking boyfriend that will have to look down at me when talking. With time I've accepted it will never happen, but still werewolf boyfriends are usually tall af and Hans is no exception, always can dream right?

As for Hans and Pip headcannons, I don't have many and the ones I do have aren't very interesting 😭

Hans is very theatrical, as we know, and I always imagined him not really knowing anything about commanding, fighting, and military stuff in general past firing his guns (and kicking huge explosives without them detonating ig). So if Hans and Pip ended up in a fight Hans would just run around doing backflips and shit while Pip would try to yell at him what to do so he doesn't get hurt. I think it would be great in an AU where he joins the wild geese a bit before the events of Hellsing. I Imagine Hans just rushing head first into a fight, having something blow up in his face and Pip going through all stages of grief before he sees that Hans just turned into mist before the explosion. This one is pretty subversive because you'd imagine Hans being the more serious Captain and Pip being not that good at it (tbf idk what he wanted to accomplish by waisting all ammo and explosive they had when the Hellsing mansion was stormed, my dude if you know the vampires are hiding behind hills just stop spamming till they're out smh)

Not really a headcannon but the fact that they both have the status of captain - cute af, great dynamic, maybe if you disregard the previous point they fight who's the better one.

This headcannon is something that kinda goes for every supernatural Hellsing OC I ever made and Anderson. If both Captains were at the Hellsing manor and Alucard was being a "vampiric asshole" Hans would just decapitate him as some fucked up version of "shut up and go away >: (". Idk why I just find it so fucking funny.

Hans and Pip swap uniforms often. Not much of an explanation for this one, just think it would be cute as hell.

Idk why I feel like Hans would be very shy when he's with Pip around other people, at least for some time he would be the stoic cinder block merging with the background like he is in the anime, but after a bit he would soften up. No smiles in public untill the first month, it's not his fault that he's no whore 😔

Pip is obviously the more social one, so whenever they go anywhere he does all the talking, but doesn't pretend that Hans is just not there, he's just more like "yeah that's me and my mute boyfriend" but he'd definitely jokingly tease him with shit like "c'mon at least smile" or "What? You don't even know sing language now? Mal, mal mal..."

Pip is a rainbow pride flag kinda guy and Hans is a mlm pride flag kinda guy (if you know you know)

"Loup garou" is Pip's pet name for Hans, I swear it's cute but even though I've been learning french for two years I can't provide any examples 😭😭😭

This one is stupid and silly as fuck but, at least to me, the wolf-wolf form, ya know, the giant fucking dog form of Hans from the begging of his fight with Seras? Yeah that one. It's impossible that in it he isn't similar size to Baskerville. I imagine Pip riding him in that form like a horse. Just zooming. Like Alice and Bayard in the live action movie.

If you put Pip and Hans in the same room as Integra and Seras and hit record you would get the best "mlm and wlw roast each other" quotes (who am I kidding, only wlw roasting mlm)

Hans likes to turn into mist to sneak up on Pip, no matter how much and how often this happens he just thinks it's smoke from his cigarette

I can't think of anything else of value rn so this is all I got for now 😭. The next part is nsfw, so heads up.

Because Hans is a werewolf this is kinda inevitable, but in my mind Pip doesn't like the idea of sleeping with Hans in his werewolf form at all. Maybe he warms up to it later tho.

To compensate for that the most Pip does for him is pup play

They're both switches

And best for last

Pip will sometimes just leg cling to Hans like a sloth and that is it. He probably did it as a joke once and now made it a habit for some reason. I know it's not nsfw but this one is so random and idiotic I think it's best to hide it at the bottom KWKWKSSKWK

Now that that's over, thank you for the ask @nuclearforest, you're a treasure and a gift to this fandom

#hellsing #hellsing ultimate #hellsing ova #hans günsche #hellsing the captain #the captain #hans gunsche #gay #pip Bernadotte #pip bernadotte x hans gunsche #pip x cap #edited this 3 times for typos #there's probably more but idc at this point 😭

[bloodgulchblog]

The Thursday War

I need to tell you guys what happens in The Thursday War instead of just bitching endlessly about what happens in The Thursday War. An actual effort. I suffer for this blog.

Like Glasslands it’s probably going to just be easier if I lay out the plot threads.

At the end of Glasslands we had a couple things going on:

Kilo Five was investigating the spread of blackmarket weapons on the hive of scum and villiany known as Venezia. (Also, Mal and Vaz had just found out that Naomi-010’s father is an anti-Earth terrorist. In this one, they tell her about it and she incubates emotions about that for the whole book because that’s the plotline for the next book.)

Jul ‘Mdama, Sangheili POW, was being held at the research facility ONI was establishing in the Forerunner shield world at Onyx-AKA-Trevelyan.

Professor Phillips had been invited to visit Sanghelios with the Arbiter’s blessing so he could study language/Forerunner ruins. But then ‘Telcam, the guy Kilo Five had been running weapons for, found him and also a bomb went off and cut Phillips off from contact with Kilo Five’s ship (Port Stanley)thus necessitating going to get him back.

All of that stands. But now we also have Admiral Parangosky and Admiral Hood inspecting the UNSC Infinity, which has been constructed in secret over the last several years. The title of the novel comes from Royal Navy (you know, of course, because Traviss is English) slang for training exercises that are traditionally held on a thursday, and the “Thursday War” in this case is the first time the Infinity goes out and does anything. (The anything in this case is getting involved in the civil war breaking out on Sanghelios.) Halsey is barely in this book but she’s confined to engineering working on the Infinity, she cries herself to sleep sometimes. Huragok are busily outfitting the Infinity with magical slipspace jumping/communications technology to make the Halo universe a little more boring for me personally.

We also have Jul ‘Mdama’s wife Raia kicking her way into the rebellion against the Arbiter because her husband is missing, nobody knows what happened to him, and she’s justifiably very angry.

So. Let’s get on with it.

The explosion that fucks up Phillips’s sight-seeing (and secret intelligence gathering) was set off by some Jiralhanae and incites chaos, which convinces ‘Telcam that he’s going to have to get this revolution started early. He believes Phillips is on his side and that it will be safer for Phillips if they squirrel him away in a temple rather than have him return to the (about to be overthrown, obviously) Arbiter. Phillips uses the opportunity to explore the temple and have BB record as much as he can of the Forerunner symbols.

Unfortunately for the BB fragment Phillips has, the explosion damaged the radio and this triggered the fragment’s failsafe against tampering. He auto-deleted everything classified and greatly reduced his functions, so he doesn’t remember who Phillips is or what they’re doing here but trusts him and tries to help him. (It’s extremely unpleasant for BB to re-integrate his busted up fragment later.) They find a particularly spooky Forerunner panel that they figure out shows the status of the seven Halos, and even more terrifying is Phillips thinks you can arm them from here.

Most importantly, though, Phillips manages to unlock a Forerunner portal that zaps him somewhere else on Sanghelios: a little agricultural province some ways away.

MEANWHILE, Kilo Five. Parangosky leans on Hood to lean on the Arbiter to let them come look for their man. Osman gets into it on the space phone with ‘Telcam about where Phillips is. They wade into the nonsense after the Brute attack and find that Phillips isn’t at the temple. Poking around the temple, of course, pisses off enough Sangheili that it’s a real problem and they have to leave empty handed.

Phillips got dumped into a farm field and some Grunts take him home to the keep they work for, where the lady of the house, Elar, lets Phillips in. While he’s there, a neighboring keep decides to use the excuse of the civil war to try to seize this keep/its territory because the men all went off to fight. The women give Phillips a plasma pistol and he helps them fend off some dudes, meanwhile Elar gets ahold of ‘Telcam to have someone come pick Phillips up. Kilo Five figured out where he is and is also coming to pick him up, though, so when they arrive they wade into the ugly fracas with the other keep, manage to convince Elar to let Phillips leave, and then they run smack into ‘Telcam’s own retrieval party: Jul’s friend Forze and Raia (who is running around with Forze at this point because if she can’t find her man, well, she’s in the rebellion now she guesses.)

It’s awkward, but they manage to get Forze and Raia to understand that they’re the allies ‘Telcam would’ve handed Phillips back to anyway.

Also, after they leave Elar’s embattled keep, Vaz is a dick to Phillips for caring about what happens to Elar and the women and children. (They die, btw.)

At this point, the rebellion on Sanghelios is in full swing and the Arbiter’s people are slugging it out with ‘Telcam’s. Hood (it’s actually Hood and Parangosky but you know who the public face of this thing is) rolls up to Sanghelios in the bouncing baby UNSC Infinity to assist, and by assist we mean also show off to all the Sangheili that humanity now has their hands on the biggest damn set of guns in space.

While the Infinity shoots down several of ‘Telcam’s ships, Parangosky is sending secret messages to Osman on the Port Stanley so that she and BB (who is in like six places at once at this point because lol smart AI) can run interference, shoot down some of the Arbiter’s ships on the sly, and ensure that Sangheili naval power is crippled overall and the sides remain evenly matched. (Because, you know, a prowler can easily shoot down a Sangheili warship, it’s not like we just had a whole war where it was a big deal that human ships were massively outclassed by Covenant ones. Sure.) BB fucks around with sensors to make Port Stanley look like a Kig-Yar ship and, when they try to warn one of ‘Telcam’s ships to prevent it being destroyed (they fail btw, this is how Raia and Forze die) BB makes his voice sound like a Kig-Yar shipmistress.

Also, Kilo-Five’s ground team manages to exfiltrate ‘Telcam before the Infinity blows his shit up. ‘Telcam’s not particularly happy about it and is salty that Phillips figured out so much more about the Forerunner ruins than he ever did, but they set him loose to go continue his fight and agree to keep giving him guns. (These events may have been in a different order based on wiki, but also I don’t think that’s terribly important.)

The situation on Sanghelios semi-stabilizes and the UNSC has made their point about their fancy new ship, job well done, pack it in everybody. Kilo Five visits Onyx/Trevelyan and Phillips talks to Jul ‘Mdama about the Forerunner ruins and how he was reading inscriptions of… some kind of prohibition about not doing something re: a great and strict teacher? The Didact??? He also promises Jul that he’ll try to find out how Raia is doing. (He does later, and has some emotions about her being dead, but by that point he can’t tell Jul.)

After that, Kilo Five has nothing for it to get back to the Venezia job. We get a bit with Vaz and Naomi pretending to be deserters and linking up with ONI’s operative (Spencer) on Venezia while Naomi has Emotions about how her dad is here. (But also: there’s a spooky Kig-Yar around who they know stole a Sangheili warship…..)

Anyway. Jul. Jul’s plotline doesn’t really intersect with anything else. While all the rest of this has been going on, Jul has been in top secret ONI POW town being questioned. Magnusson, the scientist in charge of Trevelyan, finds out about Sangheili staple crops and livestock from him and (under the guise of offering him better food) tests genetically modified grain on him that makes him incredibly sick. This is all according to plan, because ONI intends to seed Sanghelios with the GM grain that will wipe out the native strain within a couple years if they do, allowing them to starve the entire goddamn planet. Which is, of course, incredibly horrifying. (But you know, Catherine Halsey is still probably a worse person than that if you ask the author.)

Because Magnusson wants Jul in okay shape (you know, for further information gathering and testing reasons) Jul is permitted to exercise by walking around inside the shield world while wearing an explosive harness and chaperoned by a Huragok. (It’s Prone to Drift. Hi Prone to Drift!) Knowing he is under constant surveillance, Jul (who is more and more an atheist these days) plays up a religious angle while asking Prone to show him a “temple” (which is how devout Sangheili think of any place with Forerunner language.) Prone leads Jul to a building with a lot of maintenance portals the Huragok can use to get around, and Jul figures out that his captors can’t listen in on him here and this can play to his advantage if he’s very careful about how long he falls off the radar for. (Humans also get lost for a half hour at a time due to maintenance portals all the time, it’s fine.)

As Jul investigates the control facility bit by bit and manages to drag information about it out of Prone, he learns it’s a bank of portals that should lead to other Forerunner shield worlds. They mostly don’t work anymore. He also learns about the Didact (enough to get extra irked when Phillips also knows about him) and how the Huragok are like we don’t know where Requiem is but please god nobody go there, nobody wake him up, it’s super not allowed.

He likes the sound of this Didact, though. A man who knew only war, and hated the humans? His kind of dude.

Hmm.

Hmm.

Anyway, after talking to Phillips, Jul decides he’s going to have to make his escape immediately. Do or die. Time to risk it all. He goes out to the control center again with a handful of rocks and shells and uses the threat of setting off his bomb vest (by trying to remove it) to stop Prone from interfering, because if Jul blows it up it will damage the Forerunner structure (which Huragok can’t abide.) Jul throws rocks through portals until one of the portals appears to work and coerces Prone to get his harness off him without detonating it as he slips through the portal.

(Parangosky is highly unamused to discover this happened 15 hours later. She shows up to have Magnusson imprisoned in the Midnight Facility for incompetence. I really have no patience for Traviss showing off how ruthless and cool she thinks Parangosky is by this point, tbh. All that really matters is nobody knows where he went and the portal’s not working again so they can’t go after him.)

Jul appears at a Forerunner structure on a Sangheili colony, shocking and amazing the locals that someone just stepped out of the holy gateway that has never done anything before. He finds out that this podunk end of Sangheili space hasn’t even heard that the war is over, so he gives them his specific spin on the situation re: the Arbiter and humanity and especially how the latter just imprisoned him. (He’s valid, tbh.) They’re much more religious than he is so he has to flub a little, but he just stepped out of a holy gate so Jul is their new golden boy anyway.

He manages to get ahold of his home keep on the space phone and finds out from his uncle that Raia and Forze are dead, which devastates him. While having a moment about that he goes out to the portal site to be alone, and ends up talking to a kid about the Forerunner writing. While on Trevelyan, he was scratching the Forerunner symbols he found into his belt so he could keep track of them.

The child shows him some that match.

Some that talk about the Didact.

Jul gets super excited because he is pretty sure the inscription includes the location of Requiem, he could go there. Maybe he could release the Didact and get his revenge on humanity. He rallies the Sangheili he has befriended and they agree that they’re going to help him find Requiem.

SO ZITA, WHAT DO WE THINK OF ALL THIS?

I don’t have grand new revelations about this one, we can get this done in one post: Traviss continues to tell a story that is mostly pretty entertaining (despite lore details I’d fight about) while the primary flaw is her really troubling framing of events that betrays horrible things she thinks are okay about war.

We’re supposed to be gutwrenched over what was done to Naomi’s family and how obviously Naomi’s father became a space terrorist over the loss of his 6 year old daughter. We get lengthy passages of Vaz putting himself in the man’s shoes and being terribly consumed with how important it is to get truth/justice for him, a man who he has never even met. But also, we are supposed to ride along with Parangosky and Vaz (because these are once again the two viewpoints where this all pours out the most) while Parangosky makes contingency plans to starve an entire fucking world full of people, Vaz thinks about how killing civilian women and children (who are in peril right in front of him!) is fine and the Sangheili aren’t people to him and it’s fine because of his trauma, and it’s all just really, really awful to feel like you’re reading a book that wants you to sympathize with this and think it’s justified.

In the realm of half-formed thoughts about writing: The Thursday War doesn’t reach the extremes of sheer intolerability as anything that has to do with Halsey in Glasslands. But also, I think Kilo Five’s characters are a lot weaker in this one. Mal and Vaz have started to blur together, with perspective focusing on Vaz more. Osman’s off the front lines so we get scenes of her on Port Stanley having emotions about becoming the head of ONI in the future, but her remoteness means we don’t get as much of her. Naomi’s just kinda there waiting for her plot to come up next book. We learn more about Phillips but the book wants really badly to gloss over Phillips’s ethical objections in order to keep getting on with the cool war crimes.

The best plotline is Jul’s because Jul is extremely justified in everything he’s doing, because everything ONI has done has been so legitimately disgusting he cannot be blamed. Jul is the only valid bitch in this house, and the fact Jul is apparently only mentioned and never seen in the third book tells me a lot about how much I’m probably going to be annoyed to death by that one.

BDG, why did you have to tell people this is the best part of Halo?????

(If you have found this far after the fact, feel free to peruse my thursday war tag for more play by play complaining about specific things.)

#halo: the thursday war #kilo five trilogy #summaries of things

[mangosimoothie]

4, 12, 20 for Attica. 16 & 18 for Esther if that's alright <3

Thank you for asking! <3

ATTICUS:

4. If your OC likes art, talk about which piece they would love best.

DEFINITELY Le Génie du Mal! It's a sculpture of Lucifer commissioned by the Catholic church in the 19th century. The church fired the guy they commissioned in from because he made Lucifer look sexy ("this devil is too sublime") so they commissioned his brother instead, and he just made an even SEXIER version. So they just got rid of the statue all together lmao. It's everything Atticus loves - art history, blasphemy, homoeroticsm, and shady behavior

12. What is their character theme song and why? If it has lyrics, which line best fits them?

This song ALWAYS makes me imagine Attica. It's just 100% the type of song she would perform it's so sexy and evil sounding Attica would eat this the fuck up - Shoom by TR/ST

I wish I could eat your sun as I see you in a model light

20. What was the moment at which they knew they were in love, or was it a slow buildup?

Atticus was fascinated with Ryan from the moment they met. When they would meet up in the cameras' blindspot late nights during The Bachelorette they would have long conversations about mortality and complicated family relationships and existential crisis. There wasn't a lightbulb moment, but it didn't take long at all for Atticus to realize just how deep his feelings for this peculiar, anxiety-ridden, irritable, but complex and beautiful and brilliant human were.

ESTHER:

16. What trait do they find most attractive/appealing about others?

The ability to just go apeshit. You gotta be able to keep up with her or she'll get bored. Someone who'd break their nose in a mosh pit and keep going like nothing even happened. Someone who'd spit in a cop's face. Someone who embodies chaotic neutral.

18. What is one thing that they only let those closest to them see?

Uncertainty. There are only two people she would ever go to for advice (Ko and her sister). She likes to present as 100% decisive and confident in everything she does.

From this prompt!

#ask game #oc:esther #*atticus

[somegirlsnerdywords2]

Anime i've Watched

Hell's Paradise (Jigokuraku):

Synopsis: Sentenced to death, ninja Gabimaru the Hollow finds himself apathetic. After leading a blood-soaked life, Gabimaru believes he deserves to die. However, every attempt to execute him inexplicably fails. Finally, Sagiri Yamada Asaemon, a fledgling member of a famed executioner clan, is asked to take Gabimaru's life; yet Sagiri makes no move to kill him as requested.

Insisting that Gabimaru will not die because of his love for his wife, Sagiri instead offers him the chance to obtain a full pardon for his crimes. If he can travel to the island of Shinsekyo and obtain the Elixir of Life—which supposedly grants immortality—and bring it back for the shogun, then his freedom will be assured.

But of the many who have traveled to Shinsekyo in search of the mythical Elixir, not a single person has returned sound of mind, if at all. Though unaware of the numerous dangers ahead, Gabimaru decides to accept the offer—alongside ten other death row convicts—in hope that he and his wife may finally live in peace.

[Written by MAL Rewrite]

Status: Completed

My Rating: 9/10

Finished airing in 2023 with a total of 13 episodes.

Badass opening theme, moving ending theme and an amazing anime overall. It likely would have benefited from being a 24 or more episode run, even more so considering the manga is already completed but these first 13 episodes (there better be a second season) were enough to really draw me in and leave me hungry for me.

The art and animation were appealing and smooth, the fight scenes cool. My only real issue, not really an issue with the character design was the lack of nipples... it just looks silly. I have theories why it was done ranging from artist just doesn't do nipples to rating reasons and more. It really isn't an issue but I am curious if the artwork in the manga differs in this particular instance. And, if it was a rating issue I mean come onnnnnnn, the anime is incredibly violent and gory, there is literal boob groping that just seems completely unnecessary and the slime... like the fuck. My little rant there may have turned you off checking this particular anime out but i promise the ick isn't more than most of the anime bullshit you're bound to find in a shounen aimed more towards late teens or adults. Hell, in my opinion it's less ick than Chainsaw Man... though that may not be saying alot. I'll just keep digging a hole.

I am also now starting to question whether or not i've ever seen a nipple in an anime before, men or women... Surely the swimming anime had nipples right? I also wonder if saying nipple so many times is going to get this post flagged. Ahaha oh well.

Anywho, the characters were interesting and what we've seen of their backstories moving though I am interested to see if we get even deeper into them in any following seasons. I very much hope we do.

Overall I really enjoyed this one and am looking forward to more. Anime or manga, whichever comes around/ i get to first. I didn't loveee where they ended the season, but it is what it is.

Ahh be warned, not for those sensitive to gore or just straight up dark topics. Not a lighthearted anime.

#Hell's paradise #anime #jigokuraku #action #adevnture #fantasy #gore #historical #shounen

[doberbutts]

Anyway things I think all breeders should do or I personally wouldn’t consider them for my own dogs:

keep a detailed pedigree of at least 5 generations regardless of purebred or mixed breed status for each of their owned and produced dogs

health test at least the bare minimum for their individual breed (if purebred) or of all involved breeds (if mixed)- better practice is to fully health test above and beyond bare minimum by also including other known, testable concerns that maybe are not specifically required but are a good idea to do

support their buyers! I have paid 700 for Tater’s neuro freakout and that was all done within the first 24 hours and the only reason I even paid that is because I got the bill for treatment before her breeders could give me their credit card number, which is now attached to her file and they pay all neuro-related expenses. I pay for medication because it’s $12 for 6 months but they offered to do that for me too. Tater also was free rather than cost-of-spay fee as a result because I paid more than what her spay would cost at the ER. This is really above and beyond but it’s made my standards raise quite a lot.

be careful who they sell their dogs to. If their dogs are constantly winding up in shelters or in byb or puppy mill hands then they clearly are just selling to the first buyer with money or worse, selling through a pet store, and it only worsens our shelter dogs problem

take their dogs back for any reason whatsoever or at least help the owner find a new home. So many people I know have been abandoned by their breeders when health issues or personal problems come up and the dog has to go. When I was in my car accident, Creed’s breeder super didn’t have space for him and she still offered to take him for however long I needed to recover. The chihuahuas’ breeders and Sushi’s breeder likewise have told me multiple times that even if it’s just to board my girls over the weekend, if I need them to be somewhere that’s not home they are happy to hold onto them for me for as long as I need.

does breed-specific, proveable temperament testing or working aptitude testing if purebred, or actually does the thing they’re saying they’re breeding towards if not. Nothing that annoys me more than people going “I don’t need a show dog I do WORKING DOG STUFF” to justify their breedings and then their idea of “working dog stuff” is like. Dog sometimes does tricks, looks cool on social media, maybe gets a FastCAT title.

This is not Jaz Is A Purebred Snob (hi my name is Jaz and I think terrier mixes are super cute and want about a billion, I keep heavily considering a mal/whippet if dobe plans don’t work out and talking myself out of it for the sake of my chihuahuas, and I think the most successful doberman outcross thus far is a dobe/bandog cross that I’m closely watching grow up) it’s Jaz Was Raised Really Fucking Amish And Has Seen Some Shit re: Puppy Mills. Personally I really don’t fucking care what other people do but if folks are gunna bug me about whether or not I like a breeder (or a breeding program) if it’s missing one of these things the answer is probably no.

#there's some other stuff but that's stuff I'm highly picky on #like I'd consider the breeder good even if they're missing the stuff I didn't explain but maybe not a good fit FOR ME #like for me I'm really focused on certain sports and I don't want to change my lifestyle so I'm looking for a couple really specific things #a breeder not producing dogs for my lifestyle or choice in sports can still be decent I just am not interested in buying from them

[greensaplinggrace]

So you mentioned in another post that you have some strong thoughts on Baghra, especially about how the story frames her as one of the good guys. I would love to hear about it.

@youremotionallystablefriend: I would love to hear you rant about Baghra if you feel like it (and haven’t already)! Personally I don’t think she gets enough constructive critique in the fandom for being the one that brought Aleks up and for the way she treated her pupils and especially Alina :/

Anon: Hello! I love your thoughts on the grisha books. I'm actually interested to hear your take on Baghra

@misku-nimfa: If you are up for it, I would love to read your thoughts on Baghra or your full critique of society in the Grishaverse. Your analysis is really well structured and interesting! ^.^

Anon: Hi! I saw your recent post and was wondering if you'd share more of your thoughts on Baghra?

---

Hello everyone! I was honestly very surprised to see so many people interested in my thoughts on Baghra? I'll share what I can, but please know that this is by no means a full breakdown of her character! It’s just some Thoughts I’ve had, and they’re mostly centered around show Baghra because that’s how I was first introduced to her character. Although IMO book Baghra might actually be even worse.

I’d like to preface this by saying that many of my issues with the treatment of Baghra as a character in fandom come from the wild double standard there seems to be regarding her and the Darkling. Darkling Antis and a vast majority of the people in this fandom who don’t like his character have a disturbing habit of absolutely ripping into the Darkling for all of his faults and then turning around and treating Baghra as some sort of pristine mother figure for the exact same shit.

They’ll talk about how badass she is, how strong she is, how they sympathize with her past (although they’ll continue to dehumanize the Darkling and refuse to sympathize with his own past) and sympathize with the fact that she has to deal with the Darkling (who’s always referred to as a monster she must corral or control, as if he is inhumane and beastly. These particular comments always take on the very distinct tone of victim blaming as well). They’ll laud her for all of these “powerful girlboss” moments as if they aren’t carbon copies of the Darkling’s own behavior - as if they aren’t things Baghra herself taught him. Which is why this is the wildest double standard of all to me, because every horrible action they praise Baghra for is something she taught the Darkling, and something they cannot stand to see in him as well.

It’s as if there’s a disconnect between their consumption of the literature when it comes to the two characters, and I’m of the opinion that it’s largely because Baghra is a woman and a mother and therefore infantilized in the fandom quite a bit. In fact, Bardugo herself often infantilizes many of her female characters in her writing. This is mostly through the process of excusing their terrible deeds, not allowing them to do anything remotely dark, or brushing any morally grey actions under the rug without ever touching upon them. Which puts me in the strange position of knowing I’m supposed to sympathize with Baghra for having to deal with the monster she’s created, and instead feeling resentful of the fact that this bitter woman is held up as this wise old strict teacher instead of the abusive mentor/mother she should have been.

Now, here’s what I said to make so many of you send me asks:

Last note, in reference to your first line, and also probably a pretty unpopular opinion. I do not like Baghra. And it legit has nothing to do with the Darkling or with Alina, I just don't like her "I'm going to hit you and berate you and emotionally abuse you and manipulate you and act like the good guy at the end of it" vibe she's got going on. At least Aleksander is acknowledged as the villain within the narrative. Idk wtf Baghra is on but it's absolutely wild to me that people aren't more critical of her actions. Which is, rather fortunately for you, another rant I will save for another post if anybody ever wants to hear it lol. (but like kudos to Baghra's actress. I loved the character as a character, I just don't like the way she's framed as a good guy. Weird. Uncomfortable. She literally set bees on the kids she was teaching).

This basically summarizes most of my thoughts on Baghra as a character and how she’s portrayed. I touched on it a bit above, but the way she’s able to get away with so much and not suffer under heavier critique is honestly baffling to me. There should be a lot more criticism of her out there in the fandom. This is the woman who abused her students and neglected her son. Although to be honest I don’t even know how to quite describe the emotionally neglectful yet unhealthily codependent bond she fostered in him from a young age. IMO, Baghra’s behavior around Aleksander is creepy, and I know she has a history that makes it more understandable, but it’s still incredibly disconcerting to witness.

But let’s get back on track! First of all, her students. Whom she physically, emotionally, and mentally abuses. She’s derisive, she’s insulting, she’s belittling. She works hard to strip them of any self confidence they may have. She uses pain as a means of triggering powers. And the strict teacher excuse doesn’t fly. The “it’s only a training method!” excuse is even worse. This is literal abuse she’s heaping on her students and it’s wretched.

The first thing she does to Alina when they first meet is insult her. Then she hits her. Then she kicks her out.

Second time they interact is a montage. Baghra hits Alina multiple times. She shames her. And then when Alina actually calls a light she tells her it’s not nearly enough, effectively wiping the smile off of her face and every sign of self confidence that had been building. Then we see the door to Baghra’s hut shut in Alina’s face. So now she has been bruised, battered, berated, stripped of all self confidence, and then banished again. As training methods go, this is not only entirely ineffective, but it’s also just abusive.

Then we get this interaction between Alina and her friends:

Marie: One time, Baghra released a hive of bees on me. Nadia: Worst part is, it worked. Marie: It really did. I could summon at will after that.

Which is fucking horrifying and not talked about nearly enough. That goes beyond hitting your students. Baghra used a fear tactic on a young girl to activate her powers. She literally tortured Marie to make her powers work.

Alina throughout this conversation is looking very disheartened. She’s lacking in any self confidence and the comment about the bees has clearly affected her. For someone who’s first words to Alina were “Everyone believes that you are the one. Come back when you believe it too,”  Baghra doesn’t exactly seem keen on Alina actually believing she’s the one. If she did, she wouldn’t be stripping her of every positive emotion associated with sun summoning.

Let’s not forget that Baghra demeans Alina multiple times for her status as an orphan. How she utilizes what she knows of Alina’s emotional weaknesses to provoke her and discourage her and make her angry.

And then Baghra drugs her without consent. To take advantage of any information Alina gives her in that state. To use the way Alina reacts for her own ends.

Because why else would she say this?:

Alina: We planned to run away together. Baghra: You had plans. Perhaps he never did, because where is he now?

Which is, strangely enough, the same sense of isolation and separation from Mal and her past that Aleksander is attempting to foster. Weird how mother and son are both using the same manipulation tactics.

In fact, why does Baghra never tell Alina about the letters until she’s already engaged with Aleksander? Baghra must have known he was taking them. Alina talks about it enough. Baghra must have known he was isolating her from Mal. How could she not, when it’s revealed later that she has spies in the Little Palace collecting information on him? How could she not, when she knows he’s the villain from the beginning - when she knows he’s manipulating Alina?

Baghra knows, and yet she keeps the same lies Aleksander does and furthermore uses that information to make Alina feel even more isolated and weak. Baghra literally just piggy-backs on Aleksander’s manipulation and then exacerbates it. She wants Alina to feel no attachments to her past because she wants to use Alina as well. But for some reason, because this manipulation and treatment of Alina as some sort of tool is done by the woman who opposes the Darkling, it’s suddenly okay. As if it still isn’t the same terrible shit but with a different perpetrator. I mean damn, at least Aleksander feels something for Alina. Baghra’s just cold.

So, point by point. Baghra mentions how Mal doesn’t care for Alina, she mentions Alina’s failings constantly, she mentions Alina being an orphan, she constantly hits her, she guilts Alina about orphans dying, she works to instill a sense of isolation from her friends and her family.

And when Alina finally comes to Baghra, having decided to abandon her attachments to her past and her attachments to Mal, the words that ring in her head are Baghra's words - “needing anyone else is weak.”  Which is honestly just a horrible sentiment in general, but an even worse one when considering how hard these people are working to detach Alina from anybody who can help her or give her an outside perspective.

Strangely, it’s also similar to this line:

The problem with wanting, is that it makes us weak.

...which is spoken by Baghra’s son. You know, the Darkling? Our big bad villain? The one Baghra raised?

Which gives me the impression that Baghra’s teaching methods with her students are really not that far off from the teaching methods she used on him as he was growing up. It’s a horrifying thought, and leads into my problems with her relationship with Aleksander.

First of all, show wise. What the fuck.

Aleksander: They’re punishing us for being Grisha. Baghra: Punishing you. You made him afraid. Now he wants you to fear him. Aleksander: I won a war for him. Baghra: And in doing so, started a war on us.

I get that she’s trying to convey how the king feels here, but it still feels incredibly victim blamey from a narrative standpoint. It isn’t Aleksander’s fault the king fears him when he used his powers under the King’s banner to help him win a war. Aleksander trusted this man who betrayed him and then betrayed his people, and we get a line from his mother, entirely unsympathetic, talking about how it’s his fault all of these people are dying.

Baghra: Where’s the girl, your healer? Aleksander: Dead. She died because of me. Baghra: She died because they always do. They’re not as strong as you and me.

Baghra’s use of the term ‘girl’ and ‘healer' here instead of Luda is pretty telling. She either doesn’t like Luda or doesn’t care for her. Either way, this is the woman her son loves, and Baghra talks about her so dispassionately. Then he comments on Luda’s death and there’s no reaction except to say that they always do.

Like, her son is literally broken up over here. Grieving. Desperate. Run ragged. Caged and hunted. Feeling guilty as hell. Mind running through a million different ways he could possibly save all of these people. And Baghra offers him nothing except a paltry “people die, get over it, we’re better than that, she didn’t matter anyway.”

Honestly, how is Aleksander even still functioning at this point? He has no support system and he’s working against a king and his army to protect a group of civilians he could easily abandon to save himself. The sheer amount of responsibility and mental strain keeping track of a group alone entails is already monstrous, but adding in every other factor? The recent death of Luda, the fact that they’re cornered and they’ve been hunted down while fleeing across the land, the fact that he was just a couple hours ago forced to his knees and entirely at these men’s mercy, begging for Luda’s life. And here his mother is, if anything a negative support system. Offering no other ideas, telling him to give up hope, not even offering the barest smidgeon of emotional support as he grieves, putting everything on his shoulders.

It pisses me the fuck off.

Aleksander: You’re the one who taught me how to kill, mother. Their blood is on your hands as much as mine.  Baghra: I taught you so you could protect yourself. Not them.

Once more, Baghra highlights how he needs to protect himself. How he should abandon the people he’s protecting. How he shouldn't help others and only ever himself. Once more, she says it’s my way or the high way. There’s zero effort to work with him. Zero effort to sympathize or compromise. She’s constantly pushing him to take the one option she knows he won’t take. The hell did she think was going to happen?

Also, Baghra taught him how to kill. Not necessarily great parenting, but understandable given the circumstances of his upbringing. But the level to which she takes it is honestly concerning. Like, look no further than this woman to see where Aleksander got it from lol.

Baghra also forbids him from using Merzost. Which is great and all, she gets to claim the moral high ground. But she doesn’t offer a single alternative except to flee and let everybody die. There was legitimately no other option to Merzost except for torture and death. If there was, Baghra sure as hell didn’t help Aleksander come up with one. Aleksander, who - by the way - is in no fit emotional state to be making any kind of decision right now.

So anyways, that’s just my tv show grief regarding Baghra, and it’s not even really all of it. I don’t want to make this an hour long read though lmao. But I’ll go over a few other things.

First of all, Baghra’s whole “We’re the only two that matter. We have to do whatever we can to protect ourselves,” mentality is one that she actively touts to Aleksander on a regular basis when he’s incredibly young. It’s honestly a wonder he grows up to care about other people at all. But the mentality itself is something Aleksander still heavily internalized in regards to protecting himself and those he deems worthy at any cost.

There’s a moment in the books when Aleksander is attacked and nearly drowned by some kids who wanted his bones (one of which was a close friend of his). He uses the cut in self defense and then blames the nearby Otkazat’sya village. Baghra knows he’s lying, and yet she allows an entire village to get slaughtered for harming him. This is a disproportionately violent act that Baghra approves of, and Aleksander as a kid is definitely internalizing that mindset.

Also, Baghra’s behavior around Aleksander has always been weirdly possessive and controlling. Especially when it comes to the people he loves. Her actions often come across as her trying to isolate him in order to keep him by her side, even when the relationships he has are clearly intimate. Which... is especially strange for a mother to be doing to her son.

She was also an extremely emotionally neglectful mother. Based on the show and what I gathered from her actions there, I’m actually half convinced she was physically abusive as well, in that “I think I’m being a stern, good parent figure when in reality I’m actually harming my child” kind of way. She fosters codependence with her son and then refuses to provide for any of his emotional needs. She drives it into his head that everybody dies, that he’ll always be alone, that love is useless and power is everything. She denies him the opportunity to be soft and works to harden him at a young age. She tells him he must never allow people to touch him, except she doesn’t work to supplement those physical needs in any way. She essentially abuses him.

Honestly, I could go on. But in reality the simple fact is that I just don’t like her. I think she’s a hypocrite. I think she’s abusive. I think she’s a terrible mentor and an even worse mother. And I think the fandom and the books are willing to brush aside so many of her faults simply because she opposes the Darkling.

I’m sorry if this isn’t what you guys were looking for! It sounds like a lot of you wanted a more of a sophisticated breakdown, but my thoughts on Baghra come with a heap of emotional baggage lol. It feels weird to say this now, but I actually do like the character as a character, I just,,, don’t like her in every other aspect. My feelings on Baghra are just a bit personal, to be honest. But hopefully this was at least comprehensible??

#shadow and bone #sab #grishaverse #anti leigh bardugo #anti baghra #baghra critical #sab spoilers #demon in the wood spoilers #aleksander morozova #sab meta #the darkling #fandomcourse #myramblings #leigh bardugo critical #mymetas #anti darklina bs #please dont hate me for this #aaahhhh now im worried #Yikes