#I am feeling wildly out of practice with writing

[thebluestbluewords]

S’more gimme s’more

A dishrag goes flying past Mal’s head.

It’s not a bad throw. 

“You’re so annoying,” Mal laughs, snagging it out of the air before it can hit the floor.

She’s not annoyed, not really. Not when she’s got Jay beside her. She feels almost giddy with now not-annoyed she is. They’re really here, in a house that nobody can take away from them, that Evie bought for them to live in together, and they’re been invited to a party. Actually invited, as wanted guests. Not just as tag-along plus ones or the begrudgingly accepted party crashers that they were back home. She can’t be annoyed when she’s all hyped up on the feeling of being wanted. “I should start toasting all the shit you throw at me.” 

Jay throws a plastic spoon at her from across the kitchen. “Ayy, you should. I’ll start throwing marshmallows. Get some s’mores in here.” 

“You wouldn’t.” 

Jay’s eyes go bright in the way that means he wants to smile, but also wants to hide it. “Bet.” 

There’s—oh no, this was a mistake, there’s a bag of marshmallows out on the counter, leftover from the fire they’d made last night, slowly going stale in the bottom of their sticky plastic bag. 

Mal could lunge for the bag, but Jay is taller and faster and starts moving first. 

The first marshmallow hits Mal’s shoulder in a sticky puff of sugar. 

“No, Jay— Jay!” Mal squeals, throwing her hands up in front of her face. “Stop it!” 

“Make me, killer.” 

“Oh, I’ll make you stop.” 

Jay grins, hand already cocked back with another marshmallow ready to fly. “Do it.” 

“I will!” Mal says, grinning back despite herself. She’s too happy to hold on to any real annoyance. “I’ll toast you and the marshmallow, and you’ll have to go to the party with your eyebrows burnt off, and everyone’s going to think you’re repeating chemistry again.” 

“Dude, it’s way too late in the year for that. I’m telling everyone you did it.”

“And I am a proper lady now, and I would never stoop so low as to pull some horrible prank and burn my dear friend’s eyebrows off.” Mal says, grinning. She’s already burned her own eyebrows off once, and the only reason they’re not still crispy is because she found a counter-spell before anyone saw. “It’s slander. You could be hanged for saying something like that about a lady of Auradon.” 

“Yeah, who’re you fooling with that one? Face it, killer. You’re not scaring anybody.” 

Mal opens her mouth just the tiniest bit, and lets the flames she’s been slowly building up with her magic lick their way out. 

“I’ll see what Jane thinks of your blasphemy tomorrow,” she says, teasing just the slightest bit of the fire in her voice. “She’s still scared of me, you know. She thinks we’re just the most wicked, awful people ever.” 

“And that’s why we’re invited to her party?” 

“Shut up. Let me have this.” 

“Sure. You’re awful and scary and horrible, and if I don’t stop throwing marshmallows at you, you’ll what, burn me to a crisp?” 

“Something like that,” Mal manages, but between the fire she’s keeping in her mouth and the way Jay is backing her into the counter, it comes out breathier than she intended. “I mean, I’m the hot one, right?” 

Jay laughs. “I’m the hot one, baby dragon. Evie’s the smart one, C’s the nerdy one, and you’re the dangerous one.” 

Mal tips her chin up to meet his eyes. Stupid boys, growing taller than her. It shouldn’t be such a delight to know that he’s taller now because he’s off the isle, and Auradon has given them all the chance to grow. “You think I’m hot.” 

Jay grins. “I think you’re dangerous.” 

“I think you should stop backing me against the counter and let me get up on it again.” 

Jay moves back a barely-preceptable half of a step, just enough for Mal to get her hands on the counter behind her and use her arms and core to pull herself up to sit on the edge. It’s been hot outside, but here in the kitchen the cold stone of the counter is smooth and shockingly chilly against the bare backs of her thighs. The little lavender tennis skirt Evie told her to wear today is cute, but it’s too short to protect her from the chill. It’s so sort she’s practically exposed already, just sitting up here like this. 

Maybe that’s the point. 

Jay leans forward again, now that Mal is safely on her perch. “You need the high ground to feel strong?” he asks her, teasing. “Little baby dragon wants to feel tall again?” 

“As if,” Mal scoffs. As if she is a dragon, and she could fly anywhere in the world if she wanted to, and it’s just a coincidence that she’s still here in the kitchen. “I just like the view from up here.” 

Jay is so close, and so warm, and so very inside her personal space. “The view, huh?” 

“And maybe the leverage,” Mal admits. From up here she’s able to cup Jay’s face between her palms, her thumbs on the sharp planes of his cheekbones and the heels of her hands at the edge of his jaw. She’s not wearing gloves right now, and the warmth of his bare skin against her own is startling. “You wanna do something about it?” 

Jay leans in, crowding her further against the counter until he’s pressed right into the hollow between her legs, where she’s hot and getting hotter, and plants his hands firmly, one on the counter and one on the curve of Mal’s hip. “I wouldn’t want to disturb the dragon.” 

#some days we SUFFER okay #and thinking about fic is the only way we get through it #is this good??? Perhaps no #is it PASSABLY DONE #yes #my fic #descendants fic #mal bertha #jay descendants #hello Jal enjoyers how do we feel today??? #I am feeling wildly out of practice with writing #despite spending a lot of my free minutes between tasks at work thinking about writing

[hanyacoded]

if i had to choose her or the sun! megumi x reader

repost from old acc! reblogs are appreciated<3

megumi fushiguro x gn!reader

cws; none really, femcoded(?) reader, swearing, reader drinks coffee, megumi whipped for reader, first kiss, small [physical] fight between megumi and yuji for funnies

wc: 1154

writing below the cut

TO SAY THAT megumi fushiguro hates mondays would be an understatement. he doesn't hate them, he fucking despises them. there's nothing he can think of that's even close to likeable about them. the mornings? the worst part of his entire week. the nights? he's so tired he can't even think. and all the time in between? literal ass.

today's even worse. he normally hates waking up to go to class, but even that sounds better than waking up at 5 am to go to yuuji’s stupid sports practice. the fact that yuuji manages the patience or energy for this is astounding. 

it's the worst day in his entire life, he thinks. but then he sees you, and suddenly it doesn't feel so bad anymore. you're dressed in layers and layers of fluff and wool, trudging through the soft layer of unshoveled snow on the ground, making a beeline straight for him.

there's a cute little grin on your face as you bounce towards him. your cheeks and nose are flushed,  and your pretty, sparkly eyes are trained on one single thing: the steaming cup of coffee that he's cradling in his freezing hands.

“hey!” you yell, using your hands to form a makeshift microphone before you reach him. you plop down beside him, onto the bench. 

“what flavour?” you demand, not noticing the way he stiffens, or the way his cheeks turn a even brighter shade of pink, a shade that no amount of cold can ever produce. he shifts uncomfortably as you lean into him suddenly, with no regard to his prsonal space. you take a deep breath, then close your eyes.

“caramel?”

“mm.” he offers it to you quietly, and you happily cuddle into his side as you take a big sip. you always tell him how surprising it is that the two of you, despite having opposite personalities, have the same taste in coffee. the short answer is, you don't.  the long answer, however, complicates things wildly. he's never been a fan of sweet things, but you absolutely adore them. and when you'd told him how much you “love, love, love!” (your words, not his) sweet things. and of course, the one day he'd tried out caramel coffee, you'd tasted it too, and decided that you loved it.

“homemade?” 

“yeah,” he murmurs. somewhere along the line, he's started making it at home. just for you. he enjoys seeing your little reactions every day when he hands it to you, and it goes without saying that being unable to savour his own coffee in peace is so worth watching you savour yours. he's used to it now anyways, choking down his own black coffee in seconds before setting out with “his” coffee, that's actually always been yours.

you tug at the thick muffler that's hanging half off your neck with one hand. 

“wait– lemme–” you pull again, and the coffee almost spills out of the cup. he takes it from your hand gently.

“there, do it now.” 

you rip off the muffler gratefully and reach for the cup. but before you can take your coffee back, yuuji jogs over and snatches it up, pouring some into his mouth. megumi grabs it back from him, annoyed. 

“stop touching my stuff!”

“why are you always mean to everyone?” groans yuuji, collapsing onto the bench.

“wh’d’ya mean?” you ask, voice muffled by your megumi’s coffee cup. you put it down beside you. “i don't get it, he's never been mean to me!”

“nyeh!” yuuji sticks out his tongue at you. “that's cause he likes yo–”

your eyes widen. you've never seen megumi move this fast before; he lunges at yuuji, hissing “why'd you say that in front of–”

“i’m sorry, it just slipped out!” he gasps, trying to wriggle away–but even though he's stronger than megumi, the angle at which he's being held down is enough to hold him in place. and that's when it finally clicks.

“megumi… you like me?” your eyes are filled with wonder and surprise as you stare down at the pair, unmoving on the ground against a striking backdrop of snow.

yuuji shakes his head vehemently. “no, i was joking, i swear!”

“that's not true!” yells megumi at the same time. but then he sees how you seem to deflate, and your bright eyes dull. fuck it. he twists around to look at you properly. “i mean, it is true, but–”

he sees the way a small smile plays up on your lips. it's the prettiest sight he's ever seen–and distracting enough for yuuji to shove him away and take off running. beinf an s-class track star, he doesn't have to run for long before he's out of view. now it's only you and megumi left.

he's sitting on the floor of the pavilion, in front of the bench, scared to talk to you. you, on the other hand, have never been so bold. you walk over to him, and kneel between his spread out legs. you touch his face.

“hey, megumi.”

“yeah?” his voice is nervous, shaky.

“can i kiss you?”

he nods.

taking a deep breath, you lean forward, pressing your lips tentatively to his. megumi freezes, before pulling you closer to him, hand on your waist. holy shit, your lips are soft. but what if someone sees them? it would be so embarrassing. he pulls away briefly to catch his breath, but you look disappointed, like you wanted more. and then he's effortlessly pulling you up onto his lap, embarrassment be damned. your hands are tangled up in his hair, and he kisses you again, fervently. 

“we should,” he gasps, out of breath. “we should really go somewhere more private.”

“oh,” you say, surprised. “we're still in the pavilion.”

he nods, lifting you off of him, then gets up. he pulls you up too, but then his eyes widen as soon as he sees your lips. picking up your muffler, he wraps it securely around your neck and the lower half of your face, so they're no longer visible. 

“what's wrong?” you ask, confused.

he shakes his head, cheeks dusted a pretty pink.

“your uh,” he clears his throat. “your lips are swollen, it'll look weird.”

your laughter is infectious, and he's also laughing by the time you get to gojo’s car. when the two of you get in, his chauffeur–because when is gojo not going all out over little things–starts the car, and you immediately cuddle into megumi's side.

“so.” 

you ignore him, eyes closed.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

LATER

“wait, so you actually like me?” you ask, peering down at the heart-shaped box of chocolate in your hands. there's a note stuck to it that says, happy valentine's day. you look up at megumi, who's holding a bouquet of flowers and the three stuffed animals you've won from the claw machine at the arcade.

“baby,” he groans. “we've been over this already, we've been together for two damn years!”

#♡ hanya writes #jjk #jjk fluff #jjk x reader #megumi x reader #megu #megumi fushiguro #jjk megumi #megumi x you #megumi x y/n #megumi fluff #jjk fic #jujutsu kaisen #jjk x you #jjk x #jjk x y/n #jjk x gender neutral reader #jjk oneshot #jujutsu sorcerer #jujutsu megumi #megumi #jujutsu kaisen megumi

[milkywaydrabbles]

Can I request a sencario with #37 (overetimulation) with souya for kinktober?❤️ nothing better than a super sensitive or needy souya.

Can't wait to see how you write him🥹

-🐇

A/N: I took my night night meds so I am falling ASLEEP as I write this omg but I think this turned out okay! This was the first time writing for him so I'm not sure if I captured him correctly or if it's wildly OOC. Please let me know how you feel about it! MWUAH (PS I had to go back and read the last chp. because TR wiki wouldn't just tell me what the gd twins did when they were older god)

Overstimulation x Kawata Souya

The twins had hired you months ago, when their ramen shop picked up in popularity and they found themselves needing extra hands around the restaurant to assist with front of house duties. They went through interview after interview, candidates either not fit for the job or those who were too scared of Angry to stay longer than a week. It was frustrating, he was trying--it wasn’t his fault he had a natural scowl. Angry would only try to help the newcomers, giving them helpful tips and tricks on how to do something easier, or learn all the soup bases. Everyone took it as scolding, not willing to look past his demeanor and listen. And then you came along. A bit quiet, but level headed and kind. You’d worked in an izakaya before this, needing something not as aggressive--your temperament couldn’t handle the drunks for long periods of time.

Nahoya liked you immediately, glancing over to his twin who said nothing a majority of the interview and just stared. He couldn’t help but snicker once you left, rustling his hair while he earned a glare from the younger twin. You were eager, starting off strong but noticing you needed some help with memorizing all the bases. Souya had hoped his brother would take over and just help you instead, he wasn’t ready for another runner. Instead, you had personally asked him for his help, wringing your hands together as you nervously waited for his response. He helped as normal, though his angry demeanor was still present it never scared you off. You listened diligently, smiling at him with each trick he had up his sleeve. After you learned your way around the shop easier, the conversations flowed easily between the two. Sure, Nahoya would give his input here and there--but he saw the way his brother would look at you. Really look at you. He’d tease him whenever he knew you weren’t listening and kept on his way. The twins would try to send you home early here and there, give you a break from the long hours of the restaurant, but you’d simply smile and shake your head. “I like it here.” You’d reply, turning over to Souya, eyes softening. “I’d rather be here.” 

He confessed to you a few weeks later, and the rest was history.

Now he had you under him, writhing in pleasure and whimpering his name. The room was filled with pants and the squeaking of the bed underneath you, air heavy with the smell of sex. Souya had filled you up with his cum earlier in the night, but he couldn’t help himself and keep fucking into you. “So-oouya, s’go-ood” You whimpered against the pillows, clawing at the headboard with each hump against you. Angry couldn’t help himself, not when you were working so hard at the shop today. You looked so good, diligent in your work, making sure everything was running so smooth with him today. Nahoya had to take the day off, feeling a bit under the weather. But you made sure everything was kept under control, dealing with all the customers and making sure Souya had help when he needed it. He was practically on you the second you both crossed his door. “A-ah, fuck, you feel so good, angel--fuckfuckfuck, pussy’s so good.” His arms were on either side of you, fucking into you harder, his cum squishing around him oozing on the sides. “Can’t--aah, can’t hold on-fuck” Souya clenched his jaw holding in a whine while he came inside of you again, stilling while he filled up your creamy pussy. He panted, catching his breath before pulling out and fucking into you again. You whined underneath him, already feeling so full of him. 

“Sososo good, honey, pussy so good” He was slurring his words together, fucked out and losing control. Souya was drunk off the feeling of your cunt, whimpering when you clenched around him with the praise. He knew he should stop, he’d already came twice and his cock was becoming sensitive. But he was still rock hard, and the way your ass rippled each time he pummeled into you looked too good for him to stop. The younger twin became noisy when he got like this--nothing else on his mind except his beautiful darling girl underneath him crying and full of his cum. “Feel so good, nngh, such a good baby” He whined, face relaxing enough for his nose to scrunch up and tears prickle at the corners of his eyes--his cock was aching, the feeling of your gooey walls overstimulating him in the best way possible. But he wasn’t done yet. Souya had pressed his chest onto your back, turning you so he could fuck you on his side. A hand snaked in front to rub your clit, fucking you from the back with vigor. You couldn’t help the sob that escaped your lips, tightening your core around his dick when he rubbed you like that. “S-Souya, g’na cum again, m’g’na cum.” You repeated, whining when you felt your orgasm come crashing over you. Your legs trembled, but his pace kept up just a brutal. You closed your legs, trying to retreat but Angry just kept fucking into you. “S’too muuuch” You whined, but he never let up. “Ca-haa-can’t stop, honey, feels good.” You knew he was just as overstimulated, you could hear it in his shaky voice, thick with tears and the sniffling behind you. His cum was sticky on your ass and the fronts of his thighs, webbing and sticking on your skin with each pull. It kept you connected to him, pulling apart each time his hips weren’t on yours. “Gonna cum again, oh fuck, gonna cum again.” Thick sob bubbled in his throat as his arms wrapped around your waist and pulled you down, grinding himself deeper into your cunt--you felt his tip kissing at your cervix, and it felt like he was in your throat. 

The two of you stayed connected, and sticky, nothing put panting messes until he swallowed and rubbing circles into your stomach. “Are you..okay?” He murmured, embarrassed. Souya really could never believe you were with someone like him, so it took a lot for him to acknowledge that you were still around after sex. He felt you nod against him, legs still quaking from the strength of your orgasm. “Mhm” you turned in his arms, feeling him slip out with more of his gooey cum oozing out. You hitched your leg onto his hip, uncaring of the mess below you. “Are you?” 

Bashful, his face turned a pretty shade of pink as he nodded in return, scowl slowly returning to his features. “I’ll clean you up, just stay here okay? Have to make sure you’re okay.”

Kawata Souya was a lot of things. But ‘angry’ was never one of them. Not with you.

#souya kawata #souya x reader #souya smut #kawata souya #kawata souya x reader #souya kawata x reader #kawata souya smut #souya kawata smut #tokyo revengers souya #tokyo revengers angry #tr angry #tokyo revengers angry x reader #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers #angry x reader #tokyo revengers smut #milk writes #milk kinktober

[sunghoons-mole]

My Angel

“can i get a dom!hoon thats possessive and gets jealous whenever reader tries to talk to other members? thanks!” ~

umm, absolutely, anonnie!! here ya go ;)

GENRE // dom!park sunghoon x afab!reader

WARNINGS // MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! smut, jealous sunghoon, possessiveness, slight degradation kink, unprotected sex (be safe, yall!) breeding kink

FROM THE AUTHOR // hi, this is my first official request! if anyone in the future would like to request a fic for a gn!reader, amab!reader, etc. please specify in your request so that i can be sure to write the optimal fic for you! (if none is specified, the default will be afab!reader, since i am afab and most familiar with that character.)

“What the fuck is your problem?”

You yank your hand away from Sunghoon’s grip, rubbing your wrist. He slams the door and locks it, turning to face you. His expression is something you can’t quite read, but it seems to be a mixture of anger and concern.

“What’s your problem, Y/N?” He gestures wildly towards the closed door, clenching his teeth. “You know exactly what you’re doing out there. And it’s not funny.”

His eyes flick down to your short skirt, thighs pressed together. The sight makes him weak in the knees, and he had to bite his tongue when you showed up and all the other boys began practically drooling. 

You were still confused, crossing your arms at him and pouting. “What exactly are you referring to?” 

The sight of your crossed arms pushing your breasts together slightly had Sunghoon’s breath escaping his throat. His eyes flicked back up to meet yours, looking up at him with frustration. Something about the blush on your cheeks, your delicate lips frowning at him - it all suffocated him. He felt like his heart was being constricted by a deadly snake. You had a tremendous grip on him, and you didn’t have a clue about it.

“You’re putting on a show for them,” he whispered, lowering his head. His fists were balled up at his sides, knuckles slowly turning white. “You’ve been flirting with the guys nonstop all evening. You think you’re the star of the show, do you?”

You let your arms fall back to your hips, surprised at his comment. “Excuse me?” 

He sighed and rubbed his forehead with one hand, the other going to his hip. “You like that all of their attention is focused on you.” He gestures toward the door again, smirking. “Don’t you?”

“I-” you falter, then huff, annoyed. You wondered if Jay, Jake, and Heeseung were still in the living room. Would they wonder where you went? Could they hear you and Sunghoon?

You and him had started a fuck-buddy dynamic a few months back, and had been trying to hide it from the rest of the guys. But lately Sunghoon had started to feel more like your boyfriend, and you weren’t sure what he was to you anymore. Or what you were to him. 

You decided to test the waters. Maybe he’d ‘fess up if you played with him a bit. “What if I do? What’s it to you, Park?”

Something wild flashed in his eyes, and he smiled devilishly. “You like being the little whore of the group, yeah?” He stepped forward and grabbed your chin with one hand, his nose brushing against yours. You could feel his hot breath on your lips, and you wanted them closer. But you wanted him to make the move, so you continued to provoke him with one last jab.

“If I could bend over that couch and have all three of them line up to take their turn with me, I would do it in a heartbeat.”

The sentence had barely left your mouth when Sunghoon let out a low growl, pushing you towards the door and holding you against it. His lips met yours with haste, and he wasted no time in slipping his tongue into your mouth. You met it with your own, sighing into his kiss and grabbing his jaw. 

He pulled away just an inch, forehead pressed to yours as his hand snaked up your bare thigh and under your skirt. “They’re about to line up and take their turn hearing me fuck you through this door. Doesn’t that sound much better?” 

You whimpered and tried to lean forward to kiss him again, but he pressed you against the door harder, stopping you. “Bad girls don’t get kisses. Not unless they’re good for me.” 

His hand finally met your bare core, and he hissed. “You didn’t even wear any panties?” He backed away, releasing you. “Turn around.” 

You obeyed, facing the door. Your heart was beating so loud you wondered if the boys could hear it in the living room, and you were so wet you wouldn’t be surprised if it started dripping down your thigh any moment now. 

“Against the door, angel.” He said with a low voice. You obeyed, as you always did, pushing your hands and cheek against the wood.

“Good girl.” He walked behind you and lifted your skirt. The cool air on your ass made you shiver, and Sunghoon’s kisses on your shoulders only amplified the goosebumps. 

All of a sudden there was a slap, and a sting against your skin. Your attitude had earned you a loud smack on the ass, and you let out a sigh. 

“Are you going to flirt with the other guys, Y/N?” He rubbed the red skin of your ass, fingers inching towards your pussy. You couldn’t decide if you should obey so that he’d finally touch you, or make a smart remark so that he’d spank you again.

“No Hoon. I won’t flirt with the other guys anymore.” You squeezed your eyes shut, leaning into the door. “Please, just touch me. Please.” 

His finger grazed your wet hole, rubbing your essence around the rest of your core. “Who’s pussy is this, love?” 

You let out a moan that you were sure the others heard. “Yours,” you whispered.

Sunghoon grabbed a fistful of your hair and inserted a finger. Your pussy clenched around his digit, and his dick twitched. “Louder, Y/N. They need to be reminded.” 

You couldn’t speak, only moans escaped your lips as he inserted a second finger, kissing your neck as he went. When you didn’t respond, he sank his teeth into your skin, gently but rough enough to leave a mark. You began to reach your high shortly after, and Sunghoon knew it. He could read you like a book by now, knowing all the right moves and memorizing your responses.

So before you could tell him you were about to cum, he pulled his fingers out of you and released your hair, making you open your eyes and look back at him. 

He was pulling his dick out of his sweats, looking you straight in the eyes as he did so. “If you won’t tell them who’s pussy this is, I’ll just have to be sure they hear.” 

He dipped his fingers back inside you for only a moment before pulling them out, rubbing your wetness on his dick and pumping it a few times. 

“Hoon, we can’t. Not while they’re- oh, fuck.”

He wasn’t even halfway inside of you, and already the stretch was euphoric. One of Sunghoon’s favorite parts about fucking you was how deliciously tight you were. He let out a low groan, grabbing hold of your hips and bottoming out, which earned a whimper from you. 

“I’ll ask you one more time, Y/N.” He stayed still inside you, planting wet kisses on your shoulders. “Who does this pussy belong to?” 

He was thrusting then, and you tried to keep quiet against his wishes, but you couldn’t help moaning with each movement. He was in the perfect position to hit all of the best places, and you were on the verge of forgetting where you were. 

“Fuck, Hoon,” You cried, “Please. Harder. I need you.”

“You need who?” he growled, smacking your ass again. You cried out at the impact, thinking about how if the boys hadn’t heard you before, they surely had by now. Here you were, against the door to the hallway, which led to the living room where they were playing games - and you were being fucked senseless by Sunghoon while they all definitely listened. 

“I need you, Sunghoon! Fuck me, please.” Your nails scratched the wood, and your cheek rubbed against the door with each thrust of his hips. 

“Of course, angel. Since you asked nicely.” He whispered in your ear as he leaned forward, wrapping one arm around your stomach and reaching down with the other to rub your clit. “Relax, baby. Let me take care of you, yeah?” 

The sensations heightened with his chest against your back, fingers rubbing your clit and dick hitting your sweet spot as he fucked you relentlessly. The door banged against the frame, and you cried out louder than before, a sobbing mess submitting to pleasure. He knew you were there once more, and this time he let you cum, shaking and clenching around his dick. 

Soon, his thrusts became sloppier, and he groaned in your ear as he released himself inside you. The warm, sticky substance dripped out of you, and as he slowly pulled out, it ran down your thighs. 

Your legs were weak, and Sunghoon held you up for a moment before you regained your strength. Your skirt fell back over your ass, leaving you commando with Sunghoon’s release leaking out of you between your thighs. 

“Don’t clean up,” He said, pulling his sweats back up. “I want them to see what they’ll never be able to do to you.” He grabbed your tear stained cheeks and planted a kiss on your forehead, then pulled you into his chest. 

“My angel.”

~

thanks for reading ! with love, sunghoons-mole

#enhypen #enhypen fic #sunghoon #park sunghoon #sunghoon enhypen #smut fic #enhypen smut #sunghoon smut

[writersmess]

Hi I was wondering if you could write an evan buckley x female reader where the female reader is a firefighter that got stuck at the top of a tall building when on a call out and the reader has a bad fear of heights so she has a panic attack but buck is there to help her and comfort her (if you could include a smidge of hen being mother hen I would be so greatful🥰)

I would love it if you could do this☺️

I’LL BE BRAVE | EVAN BUCKLEY

Pairing: Evan Buckley x fem!reader

Warning: panic attack, fear of hights.

Word count: 1.5k

a/n: this is my first request everrr! I am super excited! I apologize if there are any mistakes, english is not my first language. I hope you enjoy it!

Masterlist

...........................................

Today was being a good day. A few months had passed since you had been transferred to 118 and you were officially part of this crazy family. You loved them. You had a special bond with Hen. Your sister worked with Karen and since the two of you started living alone after your parents death, Karen and Hen practically adopted you. You had dinner at their house almost every night and as soon as they heard that you had become a paramedic, Hen made sure to take you to 118.

And it was the best thing that ever happened in your life. You were now part of a family that you hadn’t had for a long time. Bobby and Athena loved you and your sister as if you were their own daughters. Chim and Maddie adored you, and Eddie made you babysit when he needed to solve some things or even go to dates, not that you’re complaining, you absolutely loved being with Christopher.

And there was Buck.

Your relationship was complicated. Nobody could ever contain their surprise when they realized how similar you and Buck were, your (bad) jokes, your charm, your humor. You were practically the same person. And the sexual tension that swirled between you was frighteningly visible. The jokes about you getting a room were constant. Until you got one. And you had simply the best night of your lives together.

The problem was the after. You didn’t know how to react around each other, everything was so uncomfortable. Until one day you realized that you were developing feelings for the blue-eyed fireman. This scared you so much, that you decided to distance yourself. You were giving him the cold shoulder for a few weeks now, and it was making buck feel really uncomfortable. He didn’t like not hearing your contagious laughter, your ridiculous jokes or not being able to have some of your warm hugs. The two of you were so confused.

“you should talk to him, I can’t stand you two idiots acting all weird anymore” Hen had been trying to make you talk to him for days and today as you were on the way to a call was no different.

“oh sure- Buck, after an amazing night together I found myself completely in love with you. How does this even make sense” you mocked as you prepared to get out of the ambulance and you heard Hen’s laughter.

“first of all, too much details. Second, you could just have a mature conversation together and it would all work out.” You rolled your eyes and Hen held your arm. “if you could only see the way he looks at you.”

Hen released the grip on your arm and you ran towards Bobby who was shouting orders to the team. Today was a tough call. A residential building on fire. You prepared triage for the arriving victims while the firefighters rushed with their equipment into the burning building.

“Cap, I need some help over here. A victim on the second floor with a piece of wood stuck in his chest. I won’t be able to transport him that way.”

You could hear Eddie calling the captain over the radio and your gaze crossed with Hen’s. When she made mention of moving, you were faster.

“Cap let me help. The wood needs to be stabilized and if that doesn’t work, they'll need someone with enough medical knowledge, or that person won’t make it out of that building alive.” Your heart was beating wildly in your chest. The adrenaline was extremely high and you could feel your hands sweating.

You noticed the look Bobby gave Hen and saw when she nodded slightly. The minute you finished gearing up, you saw Buck leaving the building with another victim and when his gaze met you, the desperation was clear on his face.

“Cap no, she can’t go inside. It’s too dangerous.” He tried to persuade the captain, but it wasn’t Buck who was going to undo his decision.

“Buck, you don’t give the orders here, she’s already prepared to go in. Either you will go inside with her, or I will'

He didn’t have to say it twice and in a few seconds you were inside a burning building. Buck was directing you where it was safe to step, when to duck or sneak. Your heart was pounding, your breathing was heavy. It was so hot. As soon as you found Eddie, he gave you the same surprised look, but let you do your job. When the patient was stable, he could finally be transported without danger.

Eddie and Ravi went ahead and you stayed behind for a few seconds. Long enough so that when you went to cross the same hallway you came in, a burning beam fell in front of you. Buck pulled you to his feet just as the beam passed within millimeters of your face. You were in shock for a few seconds.

“We have to go up, it’s the safest option.”

Before you could think, Buck pulled you in and you ran up the stairs to the top floor. As you went through the door that led to the terrace you could hardly breathe because of how many floors you ran up. All you could hear was Bobby’s orders to evacuate the building. It could collapse at any second. Buck radio him your location and the captain said that they were going to position the ladder for you to get out of there. Buck ran to the edge of the building and when he made mention of pulling you in, you could see how high up you were and you got desperate.

“cmon, we have to be prepared to jump on the ladder” He tried to pull you again but you were faster and took a few steps back.

“i can’t- Buck i can’t”

“What are you talking about, we have to-“

“Buck i CAN’T” you shouted the last word and he could see the desperation in your voice. You started to hyperventilate, your head was spinning, and you fell to your knees on the floor before Buck could hold you.

“w-what is going on? are you o-okay?” He asked holding you in his arms but could see you had difficulty in drawing in air. Buck quickly took off your oxygen mask and saw the tears streaming down your face. He started to panic.

“i-i can’t, it’s too h-high” You stuttered and he finally understood. You were afraid of heights.

“hey, hey look at me” He held your face firmly and tears were streaming down your face. “We need to get out of here, the building is going to collapse any second. I need you to trust me because I don’t want to lose you today, okay? I don’t want to lose you without having a chance to tell you how I feel about you, us”

Your eyes widened and he continued talking. “I need you to take a deep breath for me okay? Do it for me please"

You nodded desperately and drew deep breaths. You could hear Bobby yelling at you to get out of there soon, the building was about to collapse. Buck stood up and held out his hand to you. “Do you trust me?”

You nodded again and Buck guided you to the ladders.

"i need you to be brave"

He never let go of your hand, and when you were halfway down, the building collapsed. Buck held you as tight as he could as everything came crashing down behind you.

As soon as the smoke cleared enough for you to finish coming down, everyone rushed to meet you.

“What happened, are you okay? Are you hurt?” Hen ran up to you checking you out and you hugged her tight, assuring her that you were fine. Either way she put you in the ambulance to check your vitals and give you oxygen for inhaling smoke.

“Don’t ever scare me like that again, and don’t ever try to be a smart-ass again. Next time you stay and I go” she complained as you parked at the station and you smiled.

“Okay okay, sorry for the scare mama Hen.”

You scoffed as you opened the ambulance to organize the supplies and noticed when a pair of blue eyes walked past you. You quickly pulled him aside and he had his eyebrows raised. “I believe you commented something that if I didn’t die today, you would have a confession to make” you noticed his cheeks turning pink and you laughed.

“thank you for helping me there. I didn’t imagine I would have a panic attack in the middle of a burning building, but my fear of heights took me to a very dark place and if you hadn’t been with me, I probably wouldn’t be-“ You had tears in your eyes and buck’s arms surrounded you.

“you don’t need to thank me, I will always have your back” You broke away from the embrace and you saw that damn smirk on his face. “I hope we can continue this conversation at my place after the shift?”

“asshole” You laughed and went back to the ambulance.

You were so screwed.

#911 imagine #evan buckley imagine #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley #911 fanfic #evan buck buckley #buck x reader

[chaoticspeedrun]

Hi! I don’t know if you’re taking oneshot requests right now, but I have a suggestion for a Leo x Reader one:

The reader has long hair and always keeps it up in ponytails or braids due to low self esteem, and Leo is naturally curious about what they would look like with their hair down. During a mission, he and the reader go hide from a villain, and he notices that the reader’s hair is all let down. He thinks they look beautiful, and after talking for a bit, he says “You should keep your hair down, it looks better that way.”

That’s all I could come up with.

AN: I'm back baby! I'm alive! I am writing! I am working on the Anastasia AU and requests! I wanna draw *cries* thank you guys for being patient for me and the nice messages throughout my terrible burnout :')

Finally getting back to the asks and is one for Skittles! <3 I hope you like it!

Ponytail

Pairing: Rise!Leo x GN! reader (No use of Y/N)

Type: Oneshot

Summary: Leo was touchy with you, but he only seems to realize when he starts braiding your hair.

Warnings: None, reader has long hair.

MASTERLIST

You felt your throat burn with your heavy breathing while trying to reach the lair as fast as possible, the moment you caught sight of the manhole you jumped in, thankfully not hurting yourself in the process, and just sprinting at full speed the moment your feet touched the ground.

You’d gotten an emergency message from Leo just a couple of minutes earlier, telling you to get to the lair ASAP, you were silently grateful you hadn’t been too far from the lair, but the fact that Leo hadn’t just opened a portal for you to go through just made you feel like the emergency might be just that much worse; your heart sank just thinking about Leo being too busy fighting to create a portal for you.

Your thoughts made your body go that much faster, soon enough you saw the light of the lair’s entrance, you slowed down, trying to hear anything that might be happening inside but you were greeted with silence, worried at this you walked in, your eyes searching wildly until they collided with Raph’s.

“Oh, hey! You made it, come on!” Raph smiled at you contently while you tried to catch your breath; you noticed with a frown that he was holding a bowl of popcorn, the cogs started turning in your mind, making you bristle while you followed Raph deeper into the lair, and just as you thought: The other brothers, including Leo, were all hanging out calmly in the projection room, surrounded by snacks and laughter.

Leo caught sight of you from the corner of his eyes, you were about to berate him, angry at him for making his message so cryptic and scary when you noticed an innocent happy beam take place in his face at seeing you, he immediately jumped off the back of the couch, striding towards you and making your words get stuck in your throat with that one look.

Sometimes, once you were alone back in your own room, you’d think of these moments and curse yourself for giving in so easily to him, right at this moment however you were being pulled towards the couch by his hand and your thoughts were too scrambled between his expression, touch, and smile.

“You would never believe it, we were at Marcus Moncrief’s apartment after you know, doing us, being heroic and all that,” Leo startled rambling to you, practically vibrating with excitement “And he gave US, his biggest fans of course, a copy of the lost episode from the memories of Jupiter Jim’s saga! The 32nd episode of the eleventh trilogy! The limited edition one that was taken out of the market.”

You were sat on the couch with Leo at your side moving his arms wildly and sitting with his legs right against yours as he explained how important the movie was to the saga and how it would solve so many inconsistencies that happened later on, your anger left your body, replaced by that warm feeling that Leo brought you when he wanted to include you in things like these, his interests, his life.

Soon you were all squeezed up comfortably around the room as the movie began, it was all fine until Donnie seemed to startle and look around the room.

“Uh, does anyone else hear a beeping noise?” Donnie asked and everyone immediately perked up, trying to listen to anything.

You finally heard what Donnie was talking about, a beeping becoming stronger and suddenly Leo was pushing you to the floor behind the couch, a second later the tape exploded, and a maniacal laugh could be heard in the sewer tunnels.

“That’s right Jupiter Jim! You cannot hide from me any longer! I have been waiting so long for you to activate the tracking system in the tape!” The voice you didn’t recognize at all yelled and Leo groaned loudly.

“Awh, come on! Why does everything have to be some mortal trap?!” He yelled standing up and taking his swords out to the villain whom you think you’ve seen before on one of Leo’s infodumps of the series.

A full battle broke out in the lair until someone decided it would be way better to avoid the destruction of their home by guiding the villain away into the sewer tunnels while he kept attacking and asking where Jupiter Jim was.

“I think you need to stop visiting that old actor!” You exclaimed while trying to avoid a laser, this guy had lasers!

“I mean it’s not his fault—Look out!” Leo stopped his phrase to pull you away from danger once again, everyone spread out and Leo created a portal, taking your hand and pulling the both of you through it fast before the villain could reach you.

A laser beam went in through the portal alongside you but didn’t hit you by mere chance, Leo and you tried to recover your breaths, you were now far deeper in the sewers, completely quiet except for the sound of running water and your panting.

“We should really go back to look for the guys,” you said trying to take a look from the end of the tunnel, but Leo pulled you back by the hand which was still enveloped by his.

“No, look, Donnie knows the layout better than anyone, he’ll be activating all sorts of traps for this guy to fall into, Raph and Mikey will surely stick together, and bam! He’ll be gone before we know it!” Leo dismissed easily, his lazy smirk returning to his face while he leaned back against the wall, his hand finally letting go of yours “Let’s just wait it out and hide here for now instead of getting messy” Leo finished with a shrug.

A part of you was telling you to go help the guys, but the other one that trusted Leo’s impeccable intuition (though you would never tell him that) told you to hide there instead of attracting the attention of a crazy laser-happy villain with an obsession for a sci-fi actor.

You sighed and crossed your arms in front of you, resting your back on the wall right next to Leo, but you felt a soft snap on the back of your head and suddenly your hair was falling around your shoulders, quickly reaching back with your hands you felt the hair tie you had been using to hold up your ponytail falling into them, you took it to see it had been singed slightly, probably by the last laser that had followed you through the portal, you huffed at it and reached back to check your hair and make sure it hadn’t been singed with the tie.

The whole time you checked for it Leo had been strangely quiet, your eyes looked up to check on him and you caught him staring at your hair with a wistful expression, you tilted your head sideways and when he noticed his expression was back to his lazy grin, though a bit of color laced his cheeks.

“Well would you look at that, finally got rid of that hairband and it only took some deathly lasers to do so.”

As he teased you rolled your eyes, letting go of your hair as you made sure it hadn’t been too damaged.

“You could have just asked me to remove it if you hated it so much you know?” You chuckled “Though maybe I wouldn’t have removed it, just to spite you.”

Leo stuck out his tongue at you and took a strand of your hair between his fingers “Ah come on, it’s fine I was just curious about how it would look; you wear it up religiously, can’t blame me for wanting to find out how it looks down”

You shrugged, his hand never once stopping his trail over your hair, but you didn’t mind, Leo had been getting touchier with you, it was just an extension of that “It’s more comfortable, it doesn’t get in the way like that.”

Leo hummed in response, but he looked a bit absent minded, his other hand reaching up, like he was trying to braid your hair clumsily “You should keep your hair down, it looks better that way.”

The compliment wasn’t surrounded by flowery details, dramatic manners or his usual smirk, just a couple sincere words while his hand traveled lazily through your locks, he looked so calm as he said it it flustered you slightly, and you must have reacted weirdly because suddenly the hands on your hair stopped and Leo looked you in the eyes with his own wide open before he leaned back against the wall again chuckling awkwardly.

“Oh, the woes of being bald, I have to live vicariously through you, so you need to let your hair down for me!” He expressed to make light of everything, but his cheeks had darkened, and his gaze flittered about tensely without going back to you.

You chuckled beside him, seemingly calming him down, you were so lost in thought neither of you reacted to the sounds of yelling coming your way from down the tunnels.

Maybe you would wear your hair down more frequently.

#rottmnt leonardo x reader #rottmnt leo x reader #rise leo x reader #rottmnt fanfiction #rottmnt x reader #rottmnt #leo x reader #leonardo x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rise! leo #rise leonardo

[queenofmistresses]

Hi!

If you haven't already written one x fem!reader fic with Colin with the "I miss you" scene from one of the teasers, could you do one then and have him call on her in a few days groveling or smth like that.

Anyway, no pressure to write it

A/N i’ve been fantasising about this since the teaser came out, absolutely I will write this thank you very much for the request!!

Spiteful

“The truth is, I miss you y/n.” He says, towering over me, it makes me scoff and roll my eyes. In truth, there is a part of me that wants to just give in and forget what happened, but the bigger -and more spiteful- part of me isn’t going to let that happen.

“You miss me but you would not court me is that correct?” I snap back, watching as it takes him by surprise and he looks at me confused. “I heard you at the end of last season, at my mama’s ball, saying you would never court Y/F/N.” Now he looks regretful but I’m taking none of it, I’ve had enough of being treated this way by him and the rest of the ton. “I am the laughing stock of entire ton no matter what lengths I take, it just never occurred to me that you, of all people, could be so cruel.” I practically snarl, something I never thought I was capable of, before turning and walking off to my carriage to take me back home.

I spent the next day as expected, waiting around for all of zero suitors to call on me. This season is shaping up to be just as the last, no prospects whatsoever. Looks like I will be a spinster as Cressida always said. I really had hoped to prove her wrong.

I didn’t even bother preparing myself for a potential suitor calling on me the day after, I knew it was pointless. I saw the lines of men pouring out of the houses surrounding mine, the most exciting part of my day was when breakfast was served. What? We have a great cook.

It’s the late afternoon now and I’m playing a game of chess with my papa, I’ve much improved recently and it looks like I might even win this time. Then I’m told I have a visitor, and my mama gets much too overexcited. I insist it is probably just a friend, a suitor would not come this late in the day surely?

Colin Bridgerton. Stood in my hall, looking like a puppy that’s been kicked rather brutally. Perhaps he feels like he has. He asks to take me to promenade and insists that he has brought his own chaperone. Honestly I think he’s acting rather strange. He had his opportunity to stop playing the pitying friend so why didn’t he take it? Why is he here?

He leads me to his carriage and, the gentleman he is, helps me inside. When we’re in the carriage I quickly realise that there is no chaperone. “I know how this looks but I swear I mean nothing untoward.” I level him with a glare, waiting for some kind of explanation for hiding wildly inappropriate behaviour. “I needed to talk to you in private and this was the only way. I- I need to apologise. I was wrong at your mama’s ball, I shouldn’t have been so cruel. It was unfair and- and it wasn’t because I think badly of you.” I raise an eyebrow, wanting to interrupt his ramblings but allowing him to continue. “I spent all of yesterday pacing around trying to figure out why I did it, why did I act that rash and respond the way I did. And I figured it out!” He looks at me almost excitedly. I gesture for him to continue.

“Go on then, why did you say what you did?” I ask flatly.

“Because they were right! Or at least I wanted them to be. Y/n I would be lucky if you allowed me to court you, I just had no idea that that was even what I wanted. The whole summer I was away I was consumed with thoughts of you. Every letter I wrote to you I prayed that you would respond, every day I didn’t receive a letter from you my heart would ache, and I had no idea as to why. Why it felt as though my very soul was missing you, needing you. I tried to ignore it, convincing myself I was merely homesick.” He scoffs at himself, he’s so far forward he’s barely on his seat anymore. “I have never wished to be home the way I have wished to be with you. You took over every part of my life, so much so it was inescapable, and truly, it became addictive.” He stares me dead in the eyes now and takes my hands in his. When did I stop breathing? “I know I have been cruel, I know I am not deserving of your forgiveness, let alone your love, but I beg you. I beg you take pity on me, let me try to make it up to you. I would give you the world if you asked for it, I would grovel at your feet in front of the entire ton if that is what you wished, you’ve become my reason to breathe, my reason to live, my everything. I could not carry on knowing I had hurt you so without paying penance for what I’ve done. Please, allow me to make it up to you.”

A pull in what air I can manage, trying to stop the tears streaming down my eyes. Even the most spiteful parts of my mind do not speak. Only a small part of my mind, one I have pressed down for many a year now whispers, ‘kiss him’. But I won’t, I won’t take that risk. What I do do though, is squeeze his hands gently. I try to muster up some kind of coherent sentence but I don’t think anyone could after that. I nod. “Okay.” He looks almost shocked, as if he didn’t just recite the most beautiful love confession I’ve ever heard to me. “Just, take it slow, okay?” I manage to get out.

He laughs, triumphantly, and squeezes my hand even tighter, thanking me far too much and swearing he will be the best suitor ever known. I believe him.

He does take me promenading, his mama chaperoning. It’s one of the nicest days I have. Now a part of me is really glad that the spiteful part of my mind couldn’t let it go.

#colin bridgerton #bridgerton #colin x reader #colin bridgerton x reader

[joekeerysguitar]

erasing the lies

not friends/slight enemies to lovers <3

overview: you are an a+ student who is well rounded, very disciplined, and hard working gets asked to tutor the most obnoxious, lazy, and rude boy who ever stepped foot on this planet… steve harrington. unable to say no, you help him.. but what you uncover is something completely unexpected..

included: angst, fluff, mutual feelings, happy ending, cursing, relationships, use of y/n

authors note: heyy everyone! sorry about not uploading or writing anything in a longggg time. i’ve been super busy lately and just trying to enjoy the summer but i’m back! came up with this super cute idea and i hope you enjoy! thank you for all the love on the rest of my fics!! much love, nina <3

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“Mhm… yes.. she’ll be down shortly” The phone hits the receiver as your teacher spins around catching your eyes. “Y/N, the principal would like to see you.” She smiles her fake toothy grin as she resumes her lesson.

You feel the eyes on you as you quickly stuff your bag with your notebooks and pencils trying to get out of being the center of attention. You could hear the slight whispering of the class which feeds your inner thoughts.

“Oh shit, what did I do?”

“Am I in trouble?”

Quickly shutting the classroom door behind you, you exhale taking in the stale air of the empty hallway of Hawkins High School. You quickly walk down the hall as your heart beats wildly out of your chest. You can feel your stomach churn as you reach out for the door nob of the brown glass door that reads “Main Office.” The small bell at the top of the door rings alerting the secretary as you quickly step inside and shut the door gently. Taking a deep breath, you chase the butterflies away in your stomach as you loosen your shoulders and walk up to her forming a smile with your cherry lips.

“Uh hi, I was called down by the principal.” You mutter with a small smile.

“You must be Y/N?” She asks reading at a post it note on her desk. You nod trying to quickly get this interaction over with. “Have a seat dear.”

You walk over to the small sofa chair in the corner of the office. Bouncing your leg, you can feel the nervousness creep up from your core once again as the same questions float through your mind like clouds on a breezy day. You look around the room and notice old school yearbook photos, sports championship awards, and other boring memorabilia. Before you get a chance to read any, the door swings open to the person you did not want to see… the principal. He is older, with short small wisps of hair that adorn his mostly bald head. He is wearing a blue suit and you can see his beer belly slightly protrude from his attire.

“Come on in Y/N”

You quickly get out of the seat and follow him into the small crammed office. Your eyes immediate lock onto a very recognizable face here at Hawkins High. This face belongs to someone who’ve you have despised since elementary school. Someone who used to practically rule over the school, date every girl in the 5 mile radius, and keep his hair perfectly in place every single day. The King of Hawkins High was sitting right before your eyes.. the one and the only Steve Harrington. He just feverishly looks up at you before darting his eyes away and fiddles with his fingers embarrassingly. Your mind floods with endless questions as you take a seat next to him.

Steve Harrington is known for being the arrogant and snobby rich jock who’s only personality trait is hooking up with 50 girls a month. Rumors go around that his ex girlfriend Nancy Wheeler broke up with him because she cheated with Jonathan Byers and didn’t want to get risked getting caught. All you know is that you don’t want to mess with him or even talk to him. He fails all his classes, always goes to parties, and barely has his parents home.

Trouble.

The principal clears his throat, “I probably assume you two have never met. Let me introduce you two. Y/N this is Steve, Steve this is Y/N.”

Being polite you turn your head and put on a fake smile as he returns the favor before you both quickly look at the principal once again.

“Now I called you two down here not because you’re in trouble but I have an important question to ask.” He says flicking his eyes between you two.

Okay not in trouble.. that’s a good sign.

“Y/N, now I know you are in many advanced classes and receive very high grades.” You nod and smile agreeing with his statements. You feel Steve shift in his chair uncomfortably as you look over and see his face blush as red as a tomato. “Well, Steve here does not receive the best of grades. Right now, if he doesn’t pass his classes, he will be unable to qualify for graduation.” You nod you head as your head whirs with millions of thoughts…

“Pfft, no shit it’s Steve Harrington”

“Unable to graduate? I could never.”

“What does this even mean?”

“Well I was wondering if you would be interested in tutoring him? Either once or twice a week would suffice.” He says with a smile as he looks at you.

Your heart drops just like the roller coasters at amusement parks. Your stomach does a flip as you can feel your organs rearrange from inside. Your face starts to heat up as your palms begin to get sweaty. You’re bad at making decisions especially ones that require things you don’t like.

Tutor Steve Harrington? Shoot me now!

Looking over at Steve you notice him look up at you reading your face for any response. You just look at him and look at the principal as the thoughts zoom around your brain.

You don’t know what to do.

Should I be the better person? Should I help the douchebag? You decide to go with your gut, you can’t ever say no.

You look up at the principal. “Sure, why not.” You smile as you look over to Steve who just looks at you like his prayers got awnsered.

He knows your really smart. Really really smart. And pretty cute too. You know, maybe this whole tutoring thing would work out in his favor. He passes his classes and he gets a new chic.

“Perfect, thank you Y/N!” He smiles as he hands you Steve’s grade sheet. “He specifically needs to work on Physics and US History.”

You glance at his grade sheet as you read the grades.

Physics- D

English- C

US History- F

Geometry- B

Oh boy, these grades aren’t looking too hot.

The principal buds in again. “Tutoring could be 1-2 hours at either persons house. He must be fully prepared by the last month of school.” You nod your head placing his grade sheet in your bag.

“Steve why don’t you thank Y/N for helping you with your studies?” He demands looking at Steve.

“Thank you Y/N.” He says timidly looking up into your eyes for a split second.

His eyes were really pretty. Brown with a hazel undertone. They shined with the morning sun glimmering through the half drawn shades.

You just smile back at him and reply “You’re welcome. Does tomorrow night around 6:00 at my place work?” He nods as you exchange addresses.

You leave the office with a million thoughts in your head.

How are you supposed to tutor someone you hate. Out of all people it is goddamn Steve Harrington. The rich, snobby, and rude jock who knows nothing but of parties and alcohol. You’re not gonna enjoy these sessions, you already know it. Seeing him is bad enough, how you have to talk and teach him twice a week for the next several weeks. Might as well just dig your grave now.

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

“He will be here any min- ding.. I’ll get it.” You yell through the house. Steve had just ringed your doorbell. Your blood pressure just rose off the charts. You quickly run over to the front door and open it. There is Mr. Pretty Boy himself with his books cradled in his hands. He is wearing a dark green polo shirt with his usual blue jeans. He flashes you a charming hello smile as you step to the side and let him in.

That smile. Oh boy, made you feel different.

“Hi, how are you?” You ask watching him look around the house.

I’m sure he’s definitely judging it. Rich boy isn’t used to small rooms…

“I’m fine, how are you?” He asks catching you in the eye as you find yourself get lost in them.

Shake it off.. you gotta hate him…

Steve knows that he has this horrible reputation and he knows that people who don’t know him see him as what he used to be. His goal is to change that, whatever way possible. He hasn’t had a ton of friends since the whole situation. Heck, he dropped Tommy and his silly girlfriend. He really had no one.

He had hope.

Maybe you could be his first actual friend…

If he could prove to you that he changed…

He could even prove to himself that he won’t make mistakes ever again..

“Follow me.” You say tucking your hair behind your ears as you guide him to your room.

Your room was small and quaint. White walls with white decor. The accent the room was baby pink as you had several pictures of flowers or beaches on the wall. It was your comfy spot. Made you feel safe.

As you enter the room you walk over and sit down on your bed swinging your legs as they dangle off the floor. Beside you are the books you set out to study and practice with. Steve just looked around with a curious gaze in his eyes before he set his stuff down on your desk and walked over to sit beside you.

“Let’s get started.” You say turning to face him while you grab the Physics book from off the pile.

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“What’s the awnser to Question #7?” You ask as you stare at his pondering complexion. You wait a few seconds. “Hello? Earth to Steve?” You ramble as you wave your hand in front of his face.

“What.. sorry.” He jumps back into reality looking bored.

“Are you okay?” You ask softly as he looks up into your eyes.

“Can we do something else?” He asks trying to read a reaction from your face.

“Yeah, Math or Social Studies?” You ask totally clueless.

“Not school Y/N.” He drags readjusting himself on your bed.

“Then what?” You ask a little harsher then expected. He looks surprised at your response.

“Jeez, you’re a little cranky.” He says sarcastically as he takes the book from your lap and places it on the ground. You watch as he fixes his hair after it gets into his face.

His hair is really nice. Dark thick hazelnut colored hair that is always perfectly styled and hair sprayed. They don’t call him “The Hair” for nothing.

You zoned out for a minute while studying his lucious locks and now he is taping your shoulder lightly to regain your attention.

“Sorry, just confused what you wanna do since the whole reason why you are here is to pass school.” You brush a piece of fallen hair from behind your ear.

Steve is not gonna lie to himself. You’re pretty cute, even when your cranky.

“Did I do something wrong?” He asks looking confused as he looks into your darting eyes.

You search your brain for a response. You question telling him a lie or telling him the truth. Taking a deep breath you spit out the truth.

“Not currently. I mean it’s just a weird situation. You know, you’re popular and a jock and every girl on the planet is obsessed with you. And I’m not popular, a nerd, and never has had a boyfriend. So yeah this is a little awkward. Plus considering the fact that I thought you absolutely 100% hated me prior to this.” You blurt out with a nervous chuckle as you examine your fingers.

“What did I do to make you think that I hated you?” He asks inquisitively while still looking at you as he sees the blush to your cheeks.

“I mean in elementary school you did push me into a muddy puddle.” You say looking back up at him and smiling a bit.

He chuckles and says jokingly, “That’s the reason why? I’m sorry I did that Y/N but… maybe you deserved it.” His voice turns serious. “But on a serious note, let’s just scratch this whole stereotype thing and start fresh, okay?” He asks looking right into your ocean blue eyes as he extends his hand forward.

“Deal.” You laugh as you shake his hand. “I’m Y/N, nice to meet you!”

“I’m Steve, nice to meet you too!” He smiles brightly.

Hard feelings vanished..

For the remainder of the night, you two talk small talk about what you two enjoy and things that are happening in your lives. To be honest, you don’t mind him. You enjoy his quick remarks, his flirty attitude, his humor, and most of all his company.

On the other hand, Steve never thought he would speak to you a day in his life. But here he is, talking about movies, people, etc with someone he just met 24 hours ago and hell he was enjoying it too! There was something about you, something that made him incredibly happy inside. Something that filled a void no one has even filled before.

By the time the night was over, you already exchanged phone numbers and planned your next session.

Steve nor you could not wait for the next time you saw eachother!

Something definitely changed with him over the years. You’ve learned so much from him and how he has grown to better himself. It feels like someone took a pink eraser and erased all the lies right off the paper. It was good as new!

Deep down you had a feeling though and Steve was definitely feeling it too..

Deep down you had a crush..

On Steve Harrington..

The person who you refused to even speak to about 24 hours ago..

And he had one on you too..

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

It was three days later and you and Steve were in the exact same spot practicing questions. You could tell by his body language that he was getting tired and bored. He got up and started to wander around your room with his usual playful smirk tugging at his lips. Steve was bored of studying, you two have been studying flash cards for two hours and he was at his wits end. Steve loved the little breaks or stupid activities the two of you would do when you both were tired and needed a break. He loved spending time with you, either if it was teasing you or just having a simple friend to friend conversation. You guys have gotten closer over the time spent together and he clearly recognizes that. At first, you used to be shy and more reserved but the more time you’ve spent with him, the more you’ve come out of your shell. He loves your fiery remarks or playful teasing you always delivered right back to him after he said something to you. He loved watching you become pissed at him or become sarcastic and quick-witted with him after he would ask a stupid question or pull a dramatic stunt. So, per usual he decided this was the time to do yet another stunt he had brewing in his heavily hair-sprayed mind.

“Steve, what the hell are you doing?” You question as you watch his eyes glaze over your desk as he reaches his purple sleeved arm over towards a book on it. “Put that down.” You bark as you get up and race towards him. The smirk only growing bigger on his face as he hears your distress.

“What is this?” He asks with squinted eyes as he begins to open the pages but before he could get a good look, you reach for it. Using his height advantage, he stretches his arm towards the ceiling which now suspended the book over your head.

“Give it to me! It’s my diary, put it down!” You beg as you brush up against him as you try to grab and reach it. He laughs as he stands in his tippy toes to get it higher as you jump to try to reach it. You’re practically chest to chest as you can feel his chest bounce quickly with each sharp laugh. He is getting a kick out of you freaking out. Suddenly, you realize you two are really close, too close for comfort. He senses your body language switch and suddenly returns to a more calm and collected state. He can feel his laughter fade as a small smile sits on his lips. He can feel his heart pick up as he locks eyes with yours as he resists the urge to pull you closer or look at your lips. You look even more beautiful up close as he notices the faint freckles peppering your cheeks and nose.

You stop as you lock eyes for a minute. Steve is a few inches taller than you but you two are face to face. Inches away from eachother. You examine his face close up. His hair is slightly disheveled with strands hang in front of his eyes. He has moles freckling his face like stars on a clear night. Your eyes flit down to his lips as you notice how cheery red they look close up. Quickly you look at him again, fearful of getting caught staring. You could feel your cheeks slightly blush and turn warm as you just stare into Steve’s brown sparkly eyes. The more you try to pull away, the more they pull you in. Steve feels the same way as he feels nervousness creep up from his core as his lips curve into a slight smile. He pulls the book down as he continues to lock eyes with yours. He has no idea how long it’s been. His mind is mush as he finds himself darting from your eyes to your lips..

“Here.” He whispers breathlessly as he hands you the book slightly backing up but keeping the eye contact.

“Thanks.” You reply as you blush a little harder now as you walk to your desk to place the book down and then you both return to the spot on the bed and continue.

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

In a matter of a two weeks, you two have gotten extremely close. You would if never imagined that you would be good friends with the most popular guy in school, the one all you’re friends tell you to stay away from.. yet he just draws you in. The endless amounts of nights where he calls you on the phone asking about homework as it suddenly turns into a three hour call where you two ramble about random topics. You’re falling faster than you thought you would.. crumbling as he created cute nicknames for you and knows everything that makes you tumble over in laughter. He’s a complete opposite of you and your morals, yet you two seem to attract like a magnet.

Steve has learned to know you like a book, using his charismatic and charming personality he knows exactly what makes you blush or makes you laugh. As the study sessions go on, he picks up on your body language and your habits. He enjoys listening to you ramble for hours on end about friends or your family. He’s never really felt such an instant connection with someone before especially only knowing them for a few weeks now.

Today marks the last study session before Steve’s test. The last time you’ll see him roll his eyes at a physics question, the last time he will tease you about your stupidly high grades and how smart you are, the last time you two don’t focus on the task and do other things. You feel sadness forming in your heart hoping that after this, he continues to want to talk on the phone or even hang out. You love seeing him wave and smile at you in school or meeting you at your locker to talk. But you’re scared, you’re scared that he’s gonna put on his cocky jock attitude and won’t speak to you again… completely cut you out. You’ve seen a different side to him that you’ve never seen before. He’s sweet, considerate, and gentle around you. Never fails to have you think about him endlessly once he leaves your house or you hang up on the phone…

Little do you know, he feels the same. The same feeling poking him in the gut, the feeling where you want to hold on and never let go.

You’re suprised when your doorbell rings earlier than usually. You glance at the small watch on your left wrist as it reads “4:00 pm.” But you two agreed on 7:00 pm the night prior. You quickly brush your hair behind your shoulders as you open the door.

“Hey Steve, you’re early.” You say with a smile as you notice him blushing a bit in embarrassment. His cheeks are a slight pink as he smiles at you.

“Uh hey Y/N, sorry I’m early.” He pauses for a second. “Are you busy? Am I interrupting anything?” He asks a little more concerned now as the blush intensifies on his cheeks.

You shake your head as you chuckle a bit. “No.. no.. you’re not interrupting anything.”

“Okay good, I was wondering if I could just come now.. I know it’s our last night so I wanted some extra practice before the test tomorrow morning.” He says reading your face for an answer.

Now if he was Pinocchio, his nose would grow larger.. because he is lying. His pants are on fire.

“Of course, come on in!” You say with an enthusiastic smile as you move to the side to let him in.

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

“Okay last physics question, I promise.” You say with a teasing smile as he rolls his eyes. You ask him a pretty difficult question as you could see the gears practically turning in his head. He answers correctly as a beaming smile forms on your lips. You notice the pure excitement on his face at your reaction.

Steve cannot help but to feel his heart flutter to see the reaction you just gave him. A huge proud beaming smile.. one that makes him want to melt into a big puddle on your bed. He thinks your reaction is the cutest thing, you’re the cutest thing and he feels like it’s the right time to ask his question.

Once you two calm down a bit and all the books are put away, you’re staring Steve right in the face. He’s just smiling gently at you, his eyes dazzling in the soft light of your room. You feel the butterflies form in your stomach as you break the comfortable silence.

“How do you feel for tomorrow? Good? Bad?”

“I think I’ll be okay, pretty nervous” He says with a shrug as he smiles a bit hesitant at you, you notice how his demeanor has changed. He seems more nervous and quiet now.

“You’ll do great, trust me!” You say trying to lighten the mood as you earn a smile from him. You give him a comforting smile as you grab his hand and hold it in yours gently squeezing it.

Your touch practically sends Steve to the moon. He just feels so happy, he feels all the nerves and worries washing away as you gently hold his hand in comfort. He truly believes every word you’re saying.

He clears his throat before asking a bit nervously. He’s been thinking about this plan all night and all day. He wants to celebrate with you, regardless if he passes or not. He wants to treat you for volunteering your time to help him. And of course, he just wants to spend some time with you. You make his day with these sessions as you constantly giggle at his jokes making his heart soar or seeing you smile so beautifully. You’re like treasure to him, he wants to cherish you forever.

“Y/N, do you possibly want to go and get ice cream with me when it’s all done and over with… like a celebration type of thing?” He asks with a gentle smile as a hint of pink crowds his cheeks.

You let his statement settle in the air as you feel your heart pick up at the words. Without a second thought you reply, “I would love too, Steve!” You can feel the heat rise to your cheeks as you smile unstoppably at him. You see his eyes open wide in happiness in response as the smile grows bigger on his freckled cheeks.

Head over heels..

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

Steve has refused to tell you the outcome of his test until you two were seated on the back trunk of his car indulging in your ice creams. His treat, of course.

“So Steve…” You say pausing to swallow. “What did you get?” You push the spoon around the sprinkled covered ice cream as you wait for him to respond.

Steve places his icecream down as you copy him looking at him more curious now. You watch the sides of his mouth curve into a grin. “I passed, everything!” He says excitedly. You can’t help but to squeal in surprise as you wrap your arms around him for a hug.

“I’m so proud of you!” You say muffled against his shoulder. You can feel his broad arms wrap around your lower back as he hugs you back. You can feel the sudden chill from the ice cream melt away.

You pull away as you look him dearly in the eyes with a sincere smile on your face. “See, I told you that you could do it!” You say smiling even wider. You’re so so so happy, this made your day.. your week even.

Steve has never seen you this happy for anything ever. Heck, Steve has never even had anyone this happy for him. He just feels this overwhelming sense of accomplishment and joy that fills his entire body.

You both are now just looking at each other with huge smiles, enjoying the comfortable silence. Steve feels like he should make a move, before he loses you. He’s afraid that after this, your friendship could disappear. You would go back to your friends and he would hang out with his. And he didn’t want that. He wanted to be with you.

“So what was the final sc-“ You’re interrupted mid sentence as he presses his lips delicately against yours. You gasp into his lips as your eyes dart shut. His hand gently caresses your cheek as your body freezes. He pulls apart smiling and blushing madly as he looks at you lovingly. You just stare like a dear in headlights at him. You’re shocked and can’t even process what just happened.

Steve Harrington just kissed you.

Your cheeks are a crimson color now as you smile shyly at him. Without a second thought, it’s your turn to confess how you feel. And by this, you press your lips against his once more. His lips are pillowy soft and taste sweet from the ice cream. One of your hands cups his cheek while the other rests gently on his shoulder. You can feel his hand come and press against your lower back as he pulls you closer to him as the other pulls hair behind your ear delicately. You pull apart with a smile as you become nervous and shy around him. You can feel the absence on your lips as butterflies course through your tummy.

Steve is genuinely surprised that you feel the same way. He would never think that you, a smart and determined girl would ever fall in love with a dumb, cocky jock. He’s only known you for about a month now but it feels like it’s been years. You two just instantly clicked. Maybe opposites do attract..

He just feels overwhelming happy as he just stares at you with the biggest gushy smile and sparking eyes as he wraps an arm around your shoulder and pulls you close to him. You rest your head on his shoulder as you two just watch the sun set behind the trees, feeling totally in love.

Maybe people aren’t as bad as they seem..

People can change, people can grow..

And all you know, is you love Steve for who he is and who he became..

Because the lies were erased clean off the page.

¡! ❞ ˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥ ↳ ❝ [] ¡! ❞

thank you for reading!! <3 hope you enjoyed the fic!!

#joe keery #steve harrington #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington x reader #stranger things #fanfic #joe keery stranger things #steve harrington stranger things #steve harrington x y/n #fluff #steve harrington angst #steve harrington fanfic #enimes to lovers #school

[milkybellybites]

Pink Hope - Lee Anton

Pink Hope - Lee Anton

Pairing Anton x Reader Genre Fluff Warnings None! WC 675

Masterlist

Chapter One

—----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7:26AM

Look at me, I’m as helpless as a kitten up a tree. And I feel like I’m clinging to a cloud, I can’t understand. I get misty just holding your hand.

Misty by Lesley Gore blares through my headphones as I read the twenty second chapter of my favourite book Little Women. Being a hopeless romantic means rereading the same fifteen romance books over and over again, obsessing over said books, and finally, daydreaming about feeling that kind of love. Everyone always says that certain kinds of love only exist in movies and books but I dont believe them. How can someone write about experiencing such amazing love without feeling such amazing love?

“Morning Sunshine, lets get going. We are going to be late.” Chaewon chirps as she bursts through my bedroom door, “Gosh Y/N, how many times have you read that old book.”

I roll my eyes as I take out my headphones and place the old tatty book in my bag, “Don’t knock it till you try is Chae. You never know, you might like romance books.”

“What? And be like you? Listening to lovey dovey music while reading your silly little romance books all day.” She laughs, standing up from my bed bumping shoulders with me, “I could never spend my days swooning over men who dont even exist.”

“Hey, Laurie and Amys’ love story is perfect. You cant deny it.” I replied as we make our way downstairs.

“Actually I can. I never read the book. Bye, Mom!” Chaewon waves a goodbye to my Mom as she opens the front door. Chaewon started calling my Mom “Mom” only one year into our friendship after she had a nightmare during a sleepover and my Mom comforted her. Ever since that night Chaewon has had two Moms.

“Bye, Mom! See you tonight.”

7:47AM

“Y’know, if you spent more time studying and less time listening to Mac DeMarco you wouldnt have a 62% in Japanese.” Chaewon exclaimed wildly as we exit the convenience store.

“Y’know, I dont think I’m going to take academic advice from someone with an average grade of 54%.” I laugh, cracking the lid of my iced coffee bottle.

“Hey, I am not taking any kind of sass from a person who reads for fun.” Chaewon grumbles at me.

“Maybe you should pick up a book. Try expanding your pea sized brain.”

We both laugh as we make our way into the school gate.

8:01AM

“Morning Eunseok.” I smile at my seat mate.

“Hey Y/N. How are you.” He questions.

“Good,” I say with a small smile while turning to get my books and pencil case out of my bag, “Did you have practice this morning?”

“Oh, yeah,” He replies, looking down at the rumpled up practice bag that is covered in dirt, “Lots of running this morning.”

I laugh quietly and turn back to my books but not before he could ask, “Is Chaewon here today?”

“Yeah,” I reply pointing a few rows ahead of us, “Why?”

“Oh, no reason.” He quickly and quietly covers the creeping blush on his cheeks.

8:12AM

The classes quiet and comfortable atmosphere is abruptly disrupted by a group of teenage boys barging in hollering and whooping like a group of baboons. They are so not like the boys I read about.

“The gang is back together!” Sohee - the self-proclaimed “Ladies Man” - exclaims while sitting down in his seat.

“I am so happy you're back Anton.” A voice I recognise as Shotaro hollered from the back of the group.

Anton? I wonder who that is. I turn to look at Chaewon to find she is already looking at me. She gives me a confused look and I simply shrug my shoulders.

“Yeah guys, its pretty cool.” A small unrecognizable voice mumbles. 

The group of boys start to disperse out to there seats as the first bell rings, leaving a lone boy standing in the middle of the class, nervously grabbing his backpack straps.

Oh.

Oh. That was Anton.

#riize anton #riize #antonlee #anton #eunseok #riize x reader #riize imagines #shotaro #leeanton #anton x reader #kpop #anton x y/n #sohee

[ventiswampwater]

invasive

bo sinclair x afab!reader

rating: explicit

wordcount: 941 

Reader POV. Your dreams take you to different places, but you’re never too far out of reach. 

EXTREMELY dubious consent as always. Mostly weird prose, but there’s some smut thrown in here as well. Somnophilia, cockwarming. 

A/N: It’s been raining for nearly a week straight where I am. Every single day has been grey. This idea burrowed into my brain and now I’m inflicting it upon you. Similar vibes to poacher’s dream. I just...really wanted to write something that reminded me of the feeling I was trying to capture with that fic. Somnophilia’s been on my mind ever since I read this absolutely electric fic by our lord and savior, @visceravalentines​. Definitely go read it if you haven’t already. It features a lovely man who is not at all like the one in this fic. We should all make out with him instead, probably. We won’t.

You’re lost in a quagmire of green, knee-deep in muck.

You’re running from something, but you aren’t sure what. You feel like it must be close. You can hear crashing, the sloshing of something at your heels. The water is dark here, it’s deep. You need to watch where you’re going, but you won’t. It feels familiar.

Maybe, if you push a little further, you’ll reach the edge of the marshland.

The trees crowd around each other, their bulbous trunks bursting out of thick green algae. It’s so dense here, impossibly heavy with warmth. It soaks through your clothes, bleeds under your skin. If someone sliced you open and cracked your bones apart, you’re sure you'd flare hot. Chalky white and exposed, scattering chunks of marrow over the swamp. 

Things end up here when they have nowhere left to go. They get caught in the hanging moss and become part of the scenery. 

You’ll make a mess of this place, but it won’t matter. There are animals here, bigger than you, and they’ve been waiting. You couldn’t ever run very fast. These kinds of games are about losing.

It wasn’t behind you, anyway. It caught your ankle underwater and pulled you down, tumbled you underneath its weight. You’re spinning wildly, rolling and churning, filling your lungs with water (but it’s so hot here, and you like that stuff).

It’ll play with its food until your neck snaps. Trailing blood in the water, dragging you back to a den squashed in the mangroves. A place of dead things, hobbled together out of reeds and a dozen people’s bones. You wonder if they sparked like yours, if they’re kindling too.

Your body is perched on top of a waterlogged tire and hid away until it starts to rot. It makes it easier to eat when it’s soft like that, when the botflies come. Practical things are sometimes the cruelest.

God, you’ve never been anywhere this hot.

You wake up with your face pressed into the pillow, huffing out shallow breaths. The room is bathed in pale light, milky grey with the faintest wash of blue.

The grey disorients you. There was so much light before. You blink a bit in the gloom. Water is still rushing away above you, beside you. It’s impossible to tell what time it is or how long you’ve been asleep. It feels like forever. You lived and you died long before you were spat out here.

Out of the heat of your dream, you’re surprised to feel your skin prickle with goosebumps. You must have thrown the sheets off in your sleep. The position you’re in feels unnatural, one leg hoisted away from you. It rests on something solid, something warmer than this room.

You feel so full (of water, of bugs in your belly eating away the soft tissue, of life).

Stop, look at the window. You’re not underwater. It’s raining, dripping tears down the glass. You’re awake again and the fullness is the pressure between your legs.  

Bo’s hand cups at your breast, jiggling the flesh to test its weight in his palm. He catches your nipple between his fingers, tugs at it. When he rolls his hips, you let out a soft little noise, mouthing at the pillowcase. His cock pulses inside you, thick and warm. 

He’s already so deep.

“Couldn’t help myself.” He murmurs into your ear. “Not with you movin’ round like that.”

His hand wraps around your thigh, easing you down. You let out a whine as you feel your walls stretch around him. He hisses out a breath, digging his fingers into your skin.

“You’re so wet, baby.” His voice is husky, the rasp of sleep still thick around his words. You can feel how slick you are, how easy it is for him to push in. “What were you dreamin’ ‘bout?”

“You.” You’re not lying, not exactly. He doesn’t need to know the specifics.

It’s the right answer, or, at least, the one he was expecting. You’re never really sure with him. It doesn’t matter, really. Your dream is getting away from you now, chased away by his hands and his lips and his cock. You were somewhere. He was there. You remember heat, you remember weight. 

(Or maybe that’s all there is now and you’re getting things confused.)

“Thought you were tryin’ to kill me, baby.” He nips along your neck. You clench down around him, moaning into the pillow. “Asleep, squeezin’ me like that.”

Good, you almost say. If I wrap myself around you enough times, you can’t breathe. Neither can I, but I only need to do it once. 

People get rid of snakes, throw them off into the swamp. They’re not supposed to be there. But this looks enough like their idea of home, doesn’t it? They’ll adapt or they’ll get eaten, and that’s all you could ask for. 

His breath is warm on your skin. You reach back, your fingers curling into his hair. 

“You ready to stop teasin’ me?”

(I couldn’t stomach you if I did. I’m not supposed to be here, anyway.)

You almost ask him if he had the same dream. Was it hard, waiting for the rot to set in? Waiting for softness? Did you taste better like that? Would he do it again if you asked him to? Could you return the favor?

Your hand tightens in his hair, giving it a sharp tug. His teeth are on your neck and it hurts in the way it’s supposed to hurt—scorching away inside you.

You’ve never been anywhere that hot, but maybe he has. Maybe he’ll take you there.

“Yes.”

#something something burmese pythons swallowing alligators whole in the everglades something something invasive species something something #house of wax #bo sinclair #bo sinclair x reader #slashers x reader #slasher fandom #x reader #my fics #I've been under a lot of work stress lately lmao and I've been having a lot of weird dreams #bingo bongo himself featured in two of them. for the first time ever surprisingly. #u would think w/the amount of space I give him in my mind palace I'd have dreamed of him already but nope #my brain summoning this hick like. BITCH!! shut tf up about work for two seconds and look @ this jdshjhfdjjhfdj #peanut brain PEANUT BRAIN this week #so it felt fitting to write somethin weird n dreamy (nightmarish) w/him. idk #it's the vibe on this accursed day #this is...............somethin. idk what. but it's somethin.

[drdemonprince]

How do you feel about “weaponized incompetence”

I see a lot of people talking about it, and I know it can definitely be a thing that people do purposefully, but so many things that fall under the umbrella seem like things that some neurodivergent people tend to struggle with.

I don't think a person needs to be consciously or intentionally weaponizing incompetence in order to leverage it for their benefit. Due to forces like systemic sexism, sometimes a weaponized incompetence dynamic plays out without anybody meaning it to.

Now of course, weaponized incompetence is absolutely a dynamic that some people deliberately create (famously, a husband or boyfriend knowingly washing the dishes poorly so his partner never asks him to do it again), but more often than not, it's the byproduct of capitalist overwork and alienation meeting sexist norms that play out on an intuitive level rather than some malicious, evil plan.

My ex-partner absolutely benefitted from weaponized incompetence; he was also almost certainly an undiagnosed ADHDer who was struggling, and not a bad guy. From my perspective, it didn't matter. I still ended up having to pay the bills, sign us up for all the utilities, figure out a new place to live three different times when our rent went up, hire the movers, remind him to get a new ID when his old one was expired and we had a flight coming up, find him a dentist when his tooth was aching, help him write emails for his work when he first got a job, ask him to clean things rather than being able to trust he would contribute, make all the decisions regarding decluttering the house, take care of our pet, etc etc etc.

He deserved more help than he ever got, as a (very likely) disabled person living under capitalism. But I also covered him and shouldered his life burdens in a way that made me miserable and offloaded a lot of his responsibilities onto me. It drove me nuts and made me dysphoric to admit it, but a large part of how we wound up in that dynamic was systemic sexism, because he was a cishet man and I wasn't.

All that said, and my considerable real-life biases having been put on the table, I do think it's the case that many disabled people are unfairly accused of 'weaponizing incompetence' when all that they've done is express a limitation as clearly as they possibly could, which ought to be a good thing. There is nothing wrong or manipulative with asking for help, or for articulating what you are and are not capable of as honestly as you can. (And this honest communication piece was absent in the relationship I am describing; he wouldn't even acknowledge that he wasn't and could not contribute to maintaining a life together in any practical way. When I tried to name that dynamic, he would shut down, walk away, say things were going to change without any plan for how that might happen, etc).

In much the same way that an excited Autistic person who is infodumping or communicating super clearly in order to be helpful can be unfairly branded a "mansplainer", lots of disabled people are seen unfairly as manipulative, lying about their limitations, taking advantage of other people, lazy, and weaponizing incompetence.

The trope of the fake disabled person who is just gaming the system cuts deep. It's pervasive and it's responsible for a lot of social problems that disabled people face, from impossibly difficult benefits applications programs, to cruel teachers who refuse to provide the accommodations to which their students are entitled, to abusive and neglectful partners who fail to meet their disabled loved one's needs. Arguably I even was one of those partners, even if I did have genuine reasons for grievance and very real disabilities of my own.

The reality is that the lines between all these things can be blurred, as a person's intent and their impact can be wildly different. people who are doing their best can still leverage sexism and leave a partner feeling taken advantage of. And a partner who feels taken advantage of can have real reasons for feeling that way and can also still be ableist, or even cruel and unfair to their disabled loved one. it's tough.

Thanks for the great question, it is one I think about a lot for obvious reasons.

[mitochondriaandbunnies]

Miami Vice S1E18: Made for Each Other

Larry's house burns down, and Izzy and Noogie are sent undercover.

Made for Each Other suffers immensely from coming right after The Maze, which is a true "the system is broken" classic Vice episode. Made for Each Other is a comedy breather, and actually kind of great in its own right, but where it sits in the progression of the series feels more like a deflation than a break.

Made for Each Other is also almost comically homoerotic-- it's the episode that convinced me that Sonny is supposed to be a textually closeted bisexual man on my first watch through of the series, but on a repeat watch it's somehow even more obvious. Why are there all those half-naked bears on a boat? Why is the entire plot basically "Stan and Larry sort of have a breakup because of Stan's new girlfriend and then get back together at the end?" Why does Izzy keep saying things like nubile and anal? Why does the camera linger so very long on his and Noogie's cigarillos touching? What's up with the repetition of 'shafted'? Why are all the guests at Noogie's wedding like, extras from a Boy George video?

Why does this happen?

(plz draw your OT3 like this)

Anyway I actually really like Made For Each Other upon rewatch, it really just should have been placed elsewhere in the season. It's a fun, silly episode, and a little levity is necessary in a series that is often so very bleak.

The episode opens with Sonny and Rico trying to catch a counterfeiter, and Rico is bitchy and condescending to Sonny in a way that I think is supposed to be "ha ha, my criminal persona is a dick," but actually just comes off as "ha ha, I am a dick." It seems like he's trying to impress the counterfeiter by throwing Sonny under the bus. This occasional cruelty towards someone he does genuinely like is a fascinating part of Rico's characterization, and part of what elevates his character writing to "actual nuanced person" and not "nice Black sidekick who always supports the main white guy." Rico absolutely sees himself as more educated and worldly than Sonny, and occasionally he lets that slip. He has a very complicated relationship to both class and geography-- he's a New Yorker (...from the Bronx), he wears a perfectly tailored suit everyday (...and is a poorly paid cop), he idolizes Sonny for his football career but also thinks he's a bit of a yokel. As someone whose own class status is a bit shaky, Rico tends to get a little mean when it seems like he might be 'found out.'

Zito almost gets blown up in the ensuing warehouse fire, and Switek flips out. A short while later, a surprisingly chill Zito says he believes things are "either in whack or out of whack," shortly after while they discover that his entire house is on fire.

Please note the company that moves Zito's stuff to Switek's house:

I am dying

Trudy and Gina, in their only real appearance in the episode, very sweetly present Zito with a new fish as an office gift. Sonny is a dick about it.

Swi and Zito go to investigate BONZO BARRY who is a shady stereo and computer system dealer who has a FUCKING SEAL in his store

Michael Talbott is wildly overacting this entire episode, like to the point that I wonder if they had to turn down his mic

Noogie is marrying a stripper(?) named Ample Annie. They argue about going to Disneyland while she's practicing her routine. She does a striptease down the aisle. She is perhaps the only person bonkers enough to keep up with Noogie.

Stan's girlfriend, Darlene (who was Larry's girlfriend a short period of time ago), is extremely unhappy with Larry staying at their house, and spends the entire episode either complaining or being upset that the conditions are not right to bone; frankly, Stan does not seem to like her and she does not seem to like Stan. The most likely reasoning behind this is "bad 80's hurr hurr the ol' ball and chain" comedy, but considering the homoeroticism of the episode I'd like to think it could be a comment on compulsory heterosexuality

Izzy and Noogie show up at Stan's and, in one ridiculous whirlwind, declare the current case "theirs," ask who is the "Captain Kirk of this Enterprise," and start eating Stan's breakfast

In one scene Tubbs asks Zito and Swi if they want backup and they both very loudly yell NO like he's the reason everything has been on fire in this episode

Switek asks Zito at one point, "do you ever think about the future, Larry?" and Zito answers No.

This is funny the first time you watch the episode!

This is not funny anymore after Season 3.

The bad guy (whose crime seems to be like. Selling stolen stereos or something equally stupid) has a boat full of half-naked men with guns. This is not remarked upon.

Then we get to the Night Talk scene. I've talked at length about this scene before, but basically: Zito has been kicked out of Switek's and is sleeping at the station; Sonny comes in, romantic music plays, Zito basically describes Switek as the perfect man, and Sonny tries to get Zito to come back to his place (and fails.) It's very gay. I like to think that Sonny has a burgeoning crush on Rico at this point but is certain Rico is straight (and also. Y'know. Was a bit of an asshole at the beginning of the episode.) and takes desperate, tragic shot on Zito because of that. Zito politely declines because his heart is already spoken for.

Meanwhile, Stan is unable to perform sexually because he's thinking about Larry.

I'm sure that means nothing.

The outfits at Noogie's wedding are just. They are. Truly they are something.

The priest is a leather daddy. Many people appear to be in space blankets, including Noogie. Annie has a tearaway wedding dress. The pianist has the world's most incredible zebra shirt. There are headbands and weird hats abound.

By contrast, all the members of Vice look like they're supposed to be at a PTA meeting. (Also Sonny looks like he wishes he could ask where the punch is but doesn't want to bother Gina and Trudy, who are clearly each others' plus-ones.)

And the episode ends with Switek and Zito, side by side, at a wedding.

#miami vice #miami vice s1 #s1e19 #made for each other #larry zito #stan switek #izzy moreno #noogie lamont #sonny crockett #my gifs

[howtofightwrite]

Hello! I have a very particular sort of scene that I've been trying to get right for over ten years now and I can't make it work; I hope perhaps you can help.

A husband and wife duo who have Mixed Feelings about one another are trying to break out of a facility. (He was recently discovered to be a spy, she is a conscripted soldier in the facility. She was sent to escort him to execution but hesitated - I'm not sure where, in the cell, in the hall? - and - he took advantage of this hesitation? she was arrested as a traitor? - I don't know that either, yet - and they end up running through the halls together to escape)

The facility is vaguely sci-fi; think Star Wars Original Trilogy-style weapons, and there is space travel, but technology isn't... wildly advanced. Like it's not all digital and holograms and hand-wavey stuff, it's only a little more advanced than what we have available now. (Like SW OT.)

Point A is them in the cell. Point B is them on a spaceship breaking free.

I cannot get them from Point A to Point B with any kind of plausibility, or without staggering incompetence on the part of the soldiers and commanders in the facility.

They would likely be armed with only her sidearm, unless they happened to grab rifles off of further escorts sent with her?

I'm sorry this is so vague, thank you in advance for any help!

Personally, I’m of the opinion that any scene that’s been marinating in the brain for a long time (especially for years) has deeper structural/internal issues than just putting together action. Just from reading your question, I can feel the way you’ve laid this specific scenario out breaking your own suspension of disbelief. You’ve got several problems that have built up over time and, now, they’re all working against you.

Change if it’s Not Working

One of the best pieces of writing advice I ever got came from being forced to memorize my martial arts school’s Ten Steps to Mastery as part of my first test for black belt. I only remember the first five and I can’t guarantee they’re all in order.

Set a goal

Take action

Pay attention to detail

Practice, Practice, Practice

Change if it’s not working

Regardless of whether you’re practicing a front kick or writing a full length novel, flexibility is important. The more we try to force something to work, the less likely it will. Training flaws into your technique means they’ll be more difficult to correct later. So, don’t forget to stop and look at the larger picture if you feel yourself getting stuck.

Remember, change isn’t failure. Writing is a complex process and not every idea, plotline, character moment, or scene is going to work out when fit into a larger context. And that’s okay.

Outside emotional exhaustion and stress, my writer’s block kicks in when I’ve taken a wrong turn in the narrative or am avoiding a difficult emotional moment that my characters need to face before their story can progress. Something has made me/them uncomfortable and instead of facing it, I’m attempting to avoid the uncomfortable feeling by throwing some other distracting piece, usually action, in the way. I call these moments false notes. I usually hit them when I’m coming at the story from an external perspective (what have I seen other characters do in other stories/films?) rather than an internal one. (What would this character do?)

If something isn’t working, stop trying to make it work. Instead look for what you’re missing, and where the pieces aren’t connecting. It’s usually further back than the scene you’re working on.

My characters are always right. I’m either not listening or going about it the wrong way.

Food for thought.

Your Heroes are Reactively Active

We hear a lot from the writing community about the importance of Active Characters. These are characters who are doing things to move the plot forward. They make choices. They take action. Then, there are passive or, what I like to call, reactive characters. They are characters who react to things in their environment, whatever that is, but they’re not actively making choices. Passive characters get a bad rap in American storytelling tradition (more so than in the wider Western storytelling tradition.)

Passive characters really shine when working with characters who are in settings where they’re struggling to survive. In the real world, passivity is one of the best ways to survive abuse. Any victim of long term or systemic abuse can tell you that standing up and fighting back, especially in situations where you have no power or means to change your circumstances, makes the situation exponentially worse. You’ve got to gray rock it out, suppress, and survive.

Lastly, there are characters I like to call reactively active. These are characters who feel like they’re being active but are actually just reacting to actions taken by other characters. They appear a lot in YA Fantasy, but they’re everywhere. And, because these characters are always reacting to another character’s (usually the villain’s) actions and choices, they get an easy out when it comes to escaping narrative consequences for the things they do. It’s a deceptive sleight of hand used to maintain a character’s moral purity. These characters appear active on the surface, but, underneath, they’re passively reacting to the narrative events inflicted on them. They don’t take action. They respond to action with action.

Let’s get back to your scenario.

We have a husband and wife in some sort of heavily or, at least, decently fortified, military installation. The husband has been outed as a spy, put in whatever functions as a prison or holding cell within the complex, and scheduled to be executed. The wife is a loyal soldier who must now choose between her love for her husband and her love of duty.

This has the makings of some good drama.

The first obvious problem point is that these characters are trying to do too many things at once. They’re coming to terms with their deep feelings of betrayal, experiencing a last minute change of heart, making a snap decision to escape, and rapidly coming up with a plan to escape in the heat of the moment. If this feels unbelievable, it’s because it is and, even better, doubles for putting the characters in a reactive or passive state. The wife character isn’t acting, so much as she’s reacting last minute to the immediate, impending danger. That would be fine if she wasn’t also having to help carry the burden of coming up with The Plan.

There’s the surface level here, where the last minute change of heart is mimicking the kinds of behavior seen in countless other forms of media regarding escape scenes. However, this narrative decision happening in the heat of the moment is also allowing the character to skate over the emotional consequences of her own betrayal. She’s not choosing so much as she’s being forced to make a choice. And that is removing her agency.

If she makes the choice earlier, starts putting The Plan in place with the help of some friends/colleagues (even if it happens largely off page) then executes at the cell, she takes back her agency and retains her status as an active character.

The difference here is in the processing time. Characters can’t plausibly escape fortified lock up without a plan or, really, The Plan.

The Narrative Structure of Last Minute Rescues

The first problem in your scenario is that you have two characters, neither of which are doing the pre-planning legwork required to successfully execute The Plan. Rescues are like heists, they either take a village or require characters who are extremely meticulous and actively manipulating the village to fill in the gaps. (James Bond does Option 2 beautifully, but even he has a team behind him.) Usually, both happen to some degree. The burden is segregated out into different pieces for different characters. Normally, there’s at least three. The character locked up is trying to figure out a way to escape, but comes up short. The one on the outside who is putting together the pieces needed to execute the rescue/get away. And, sometimes, the one on the inside who is experiencing a change of heart, who, at the very last minute, turns heel and assists with the rescue (most often in the turn of misfortune where a piece fails and the rescue is at risk of being bungled.)

All of this additional weight/build up/expectation of the non-existent plan is being put on two characters and crammed into a single scene.

Think about the rescue of Princess Leia from the Death Star for a moment. How many characters are required to make that escape work?

Seven.

All of them. If a single character in the entire group is missing, the whole thing falls apart. Even Threepio is necessary, mostly because Artoo can’t talk. This off the cuff, by the seat of our pants rescue requires all seven characters and they still end up bungling it to kill their samurai master.

You need one to turn off the tractor beam so they can actually escape. (Doing the real work.)

You need one to figure out where the princess is being held, unlock the doors, and figure out where they are.

You need two to bullshit past the guards going in and one to pretend to be a prisoner.

You need one to bullshit past the guards a second time to save the one that can’t talk with the floor plan.

You need the princess to be the one to get them back out because she’s the only one with balls.

And none of it mattered because the escape was a trap all along.

While you don’t need these specific roles for everything, escaping from a heavily fortified facility is not a two man job. That’s where the feelings of implausibility and extreme incompetence are coming from. There aren’t enough characters helping to clear the way or be there as a safeguard for when things go wrong. This feeds into the next problem.

Soldiers, Spies, and Their Squads

We have another unintended scenario brewing at the same time. And that’s the exhausted retail employee going on a rampage and slaughtering their surprised colleagues. This really knifes your tension. By reacting to the immediate danger, the wife is not making an active, conscious choice with full knowledge of the consequences, and those consequences are killing people she knows, respects, is friends with, shares a camaraderie, or who are at least familiar to her. These other soldiers aren’t faceless goons. It’s a lot harder to pull the trigger on someone you know than someone you don’t, especially someone who has the same values that you do.

Soldiers aren’t characters who work alone. They have a squad. They’re part of a unit. They have a support network surrounding them that allows them to do their job to the best of their ability. Spies are the same way. They also have a support network which allows them to act to the best of their ability, even when it feels like they’re acting alone. Spies have handlers and they have assets, their job requires they build their own support networks so they have someone who can get into the places where they can’t. Those people may be witting or unwitting assets but they’re still there.

Both of these characters should have fairly extensive support networks to fall back on when in crisis. They’re in crisis. The crisis is both physical and emotional. Where are their people? Two characters who are social archetypes whose jobs and survival during wartime are reliant on building trust and skillful communication have no one willing to put their lives on the line to help them out? They only have each other? That’s staggering incompetence.

Spies aren’t assassins. They’re social animals. Soldiers aren’t lone wolves. They’re social animals. If there’s a structural failure here, it’s happening with your secondary characters.  Ignoring the importance of secondary characters is a mistake that a lot of new writers make and I can feel those early mistakes being carried forward in this scene. This is what Hemingway meant when he said, “kill your darlings.” If an idea isn’t working, if it’s holding you back, kill it. Look at the problem and your work from a new angle. One good line or one good scene, regardless of your emotional attachment to it, doesn’t outweigh the entire work.

Plans and Floor Plans

If you’re having trouble coming up with a character’s escape, step back and take a look at the facility itself. Whether it’s breaking in or breaking out, you, the author, need to have a clear visualization of the entire picture so you can find the weaknesses or fracture points.

Plans are easier to conceptualize when you know what the dangers are and what defenses have been put in place to prevent what your characters are attempting. Which parts of the fortress are better fortified than others? Where does this military expect to be attacked? What have they done to prevent it? What are the patrols? Who are the techs? How does the military support itself while fending off attempts to damage its resources? Who handles the supply lines?

The boring minutiae of your world is what makes it feel real. Action is dependent on your world building and this goes deeper than just their weapons. The social systems in place guide how your characters fight. It’s there in how they perceive their environment, and how they recognize usable tools. If you build a functional and consistent world, the action will take care of itself because violence is a natural response to environmental threats. Violence seeks to exploit established systems, to gain an advantage over them. If the violence is imagined separately from the environment, the violence won’t feel real because it’s not reactive and it’s not reacting to environmental stimuli. From there, it’s not logical.

Ask yourself, why do we use guns?

Then ask yourself, why do your characters use guns? What does it allow them to do that they wouldn’t be able to do otherwise? Or, what does the gun do better than other weapons that makes it the preferred choice?

The answer for the real world and your setting might be the same, and they might be different. Both will influence how the character uses their weapon. How they use their weapon guides how they fight. If you’re lost, ask yourself questions.

For example, let’s take a last look at the prison.

Prisons are built with the expectation of keeping multiple people contained for an extended period of time, preventing them from leaving in the event of an escape, and preventing those who are sympathetic from breaking in to rescue them. What have the characters in your setting (not your protagonists) done to facilitate that goal? What safeguards have been put in place to prevent someone from leaving and entering?

In the real world, prisons are built in a way that two people can’t just walk out. There are points of entry and exit that are designed to be remotely controlled from secure locations and cannot be operated or accessed on the ground. You’d need someone (like R2-D2) who can access the remote functions to get someone past the exits that they can’t open themselves.

-Michi

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#howtofightwrite #Michi answers #writing advice #writing reference #writing tips

[bomberqueen17]

adderall day 1

I'm not going to have any particular deep thoughts about this, but I feel like I should write stuff down. Several people have advised that.

I still don't know how much this is going to cost me, as my insurance couldn't be verified and I'm going to have to do messy things probably to find out. But I've got the pills in my hot little hand, 16 of them, and a follow-up appointment, and perhaps by then I'll know what this is actually costing.

It seems that it varies wildly how people manage to get ADHD dx's. Many many PCPs will not diagnose it or prescribe for it. It seems extremely gatekeepy to me, and not in a helpful way. my own PCP, as I describe more and more of my struggles to get healthcare in general, is being revealed to me to be less and less of any kind of a good fit-- she just seems baffled by everything I say. She asked if I have heartburn, for example, and I said, truthfully, oh yes, if I don't eat regularly, one of the ways I realize I've gone too long is that I start to have heartburn. So I've learned to be conscientious about my eating schedule, and eat small meals and snacks at regular intervals throughout the day, and that has cleared up the problem. And this actively baffled her, she was like "i've never heard of anything like this", and I can't imagine what she thought I was saying. Does no one else in the human race ever get queasy/stomach-acidy from going too long without food? Especially eating heavily and then not eating for a long time afterward? That's the worst for me, so I avoid that. I highly doubt I am the only person ever to experience this. But she seemed convinced that I must not know what heartburn is.

That's just one example. So. If I can get my head on straight at all, I am going to start looking for a new primary care physician. I'm sure this doctor is fine, just not for me.

(She is obsessed that my fasting blood glucose levels are too high. I read an article about it, in the 2010s sometime the CDC decided that 5.7 was a new worrying number (I don't know what the units are, but 7 is what people with well-managed diabetes shoot for), and now they were going to declare this new number "pre-diabetes" and start medicating it. The WHO has refused the concept of "pre-diabetes", pointing out that about 2% of people with this number wind up developing full-blown diabetes whether medicated or not, and that's about the same number of people who develop diabetes without having had this diagnosis, so it is in fact not any kind of reliable indicator of looming diabetes, so it should be referred to as "elevated fasting blood glucose levels" and not the new fictional "pre-diabetes". But there's money in selling that medicine, so American doctors are encouraged to make this diagnosis. And my doctor has put it into my chart that she plans to start me on Metformin if this number does not go down.

I'm refusing that. Medicate me for diabetes if I develop diabetes. I can be annually screened for it just like anyone. Sure, keep an eye on it! I take this seriously. But i am not getting medicated for a condition the WHO thinks is fictional. Thanks.)

Anyway that was a digression.

I'm hoping to at least make a start on dialing in my meds with this online guy, so that when I switch PCPs I can show up with the ADHD treatment as a fait accomplit and not have the new PCP throw a fit. I might try it with the current one too-- "Idk you told me it was incredibly complicated and insurance doesn't cover it so I went to my insurance company and they sent me to this guy and it wasn't complicated at all and I'm responding super well to the treatment so I guess this is what I do now?" but I am just anticipating her throwing a fit of some kind, since she is absolutely convinced I have major depressive disorder and has been trying to get me to go back on Celexa, which did me so much no good that I cold-turkeyed off it and gave myself horrible brain zaps. Don't fucking do that guys.

(It was with this same practice! It's on there, I no-showed to an appointment because I had so little executive function I wasn't even able to keep track of it! And she's still like yah medicating u for depression is super what's going to work. ma'am i have never been suicidal but I remember being on Celexa and most of it was my shitty life situation at the time but mostly it is a gray expanse of despair and ineffectualness, and getting inexorably fatter whilst starting to develop an eating disorder about it, and getting benched by my roller derby coach despite exercising myself to constant exhaustion and performing better than I ever had on the track because she saw my spreading waistline and assumed I was slacking off, and anyway. Yeah no.)

So anyway. I'm letting myself be stream of consciousnessy because it seems right. I had a reasonable breakfast, a lot of water, some coffee, a multivitamin, and my first pill about an hour ago, and am now ensconced in the recliner with the cat because the cat insists. I have started to feel.... kind of... like my throat feels kind of dry so I'm drinking more water, and I just got a little bit not quite dizzy and am acutely aware of all my eye movements, so I guess that's notable.

OK the plan. I would like to someday be able to make to-do lists, that's a medium-term goal. Meanwhile I'm still doing narratives of how i'd like a day to go. I have fallen off that a bit; I've been trying to do not a bullet journal but a just regular day planner in this new year (i got something on clearance off amazon lol) and mostly what I've used it for is as a diary post-hoc, writing down what i got done, and making little notes of what I want to get done, because otherwise my memory wipes itself and I don't know what I did all last week either. I fell off it this week because Dude was out of town and I was off kilter. But I'm going to fill back in what I can remember-- I'm keeping track of what meals I cook, what exercise I do, things like that-- and hope to keep it up going forward.

Routine, I hope, is what will help me.

Today. It is rainy today. I didn't get some of my stuff done while Dude was gone because of course the list I made would have taken six weeks of work, that's how my lists go. But I did get a lot done, so I'm going to write all that down. And today it is rainy, so I can spend time in the basement. What I want to do is empty out all my nice baskets I use to tote craft things around, and re-fill them with more curated selections. I think one basket for like, all the sewing tools, just all of them, in one place, and then another basket that is like, all of the embroidery supplies, and then a container that is An Adequate Selection Of Thread and also machine-sewing supplies? maybe? and then Active Projects can go into a third container that may or may not travel with me. Anyway, thinking about that is a work in progress.

I need to pack for my first trip of the season to the farm. I need to put away all the supplies from painting the kitchen, because I am finally officially totally completely done with that. I need to then tidy the kitchen counter and there's a little wooden cart that used to have our coffee stuff on it and I've been using it to dump all the shit and assorted project detritus from the ongoing painting on, and I need to then move that cart somewhere once I've put away all the things on it.

That seems like a reasonable amount of things to expect to complete today. OK I need to get out from under this cat because I have to pee now. All right. She'll be fine she just wants the chair really.

Yah ok i really gotta pee and dude is in the shower so i'm going to go get dressed and dance around a little lolsob. wish me luck.

#about the author #B vs ADHD

[claymoresword]

The Queen And Her Knight | Chp: 2

Alicent Hightower x Knight Fem!Reader

Summary: Alicent Hightower against her better judgement, falls in love with her sworn protector. Can she bear to fight her feelings or will she finally just give in?

Pairing: Alicent Hightower x Reader

Wordcount: 3.6k

Warnings: Smut(?), Angst, Harsh language, Mention of abuse, Aegon ii targaryen sympathiser, Reader and Alicent can't stay away from each other if they tried

Note: Bare in mind that I am writing this with very surface level knowledge of the Greyjoys and asoiaf in general so apologies if i write anything wildly inaccurate its not my intention to offend! Also disclaimer: i aged dalton greyjoy up in the story to make the narrative more logical

As usual i hope you enjoy and let me know what u think!

Chapter 3

Alicent awakes from her restless slumber. Her body was exhausted beyond belief pleading for sleep to take over and yet her mind had other plans.

She had spent the entire hour of the wolf weeping. Recalling her encounter with y/n and everything she had said. Everything she wishes she could have said.

It was now dawn, only a few minutes until the sun rises. Moments until she will never have to see you again.

Alicent gets up from her bed, situating herself beside it. On her knees, she begins to pray. She prays for strength, she begs to the gods to make all of this bearable. She wants so badly for her feelings for you to be squandered. Alicent spent countless nights praying for the same, she quickly realised it doesn't work that way.

The Queen was prepared to spend the entire morning practicing her faith, asking for forgiveness as the events of last night haunted her. Looming over her like a dark cloud. She feels guilty for kissing you, even more guilty for enjoying it.

Alicent couldn't help but feel entirely responsible. Her status meant she had dominion over you. She blames herself for allowing you to grow fond of her. It is her fault for abusing her power, you are entitled to your own feelings but she is far from innocent.

Alicent recalls her mother's words, her father's abhorred gaze.

She had been through this with the Princess and now she had done it again with you.

Rhaenyra.

Tears flow out of the Queen's eyes again and she shuts them tightly. Her childhood companion threatening the forefront of her mind, demanding to be remembered.

Alicent begins to pray again, she recites loudly. A desperate attempt to silence her mind, her heart.

A knock at the door and the auburn haired woman lets out a sigh. She glances over at the window, the sun streaming in. Alicent feels relief and dread all the same.

She stands up and grabs her robe, covering herself up for modesty.

"Come." Alicent announces.

Her handmaiden Talya walks in and does a curtesy before speaking.

"Lady y/n has began her departure your grace. I came to see if you would like my help to get dressed, if her grace would like to see the lady off?" Talya asks earnestly.

"Yes, Talya thank you. Help me dress, but I will not be seeing lady y/n. I would like to attend to the King and get started on my duties for the day."

Talya doesn't not attempt to hide her confusion at the Queens words but decides to question her no further.

"Ofcourse, Your Grace."

--

Alicent had been at the sept for all hours that morning. She missed breakfast and hadn't greeted her children yet, a routine she rarely broken.

Alicent couldn't bare to face them, she had no desire to see anybody.

Heavy footsteps approach her, interrupting the Queen mid prayer.

"Mother!"

She recognised the voice immediately. Her son. His tone had quickly given him away but the look on his face solidified it. He was angry.

Alicent swiftly stands up and faces her son.

"Imagine my surprise mother, when I took to the field prepared to spar with my usual partner and yet Ser Criston was sent for me instead."

Alicent breaks her son's gaze and glances down but says nothing. 

Aemond continues.

"Please allow me to understand dear mother, why did you send her away?"

The prince's tone now gentle, a rather abrupt shift of demeanor from just a moment ago.

"I no longer saw need for lady y/n services. I am perfectly content with Ser Criston as protector."

Alicent falsely admits, shocked at her own ability to sound poised while telling a blatant fib.

Aemond scoffs, he is no longer angry but in disbelief.

"Did you think to ask me for an opinion? Or even Helaena for that matter."

"You may no longer need her but we do. Cole is competent enough but he provides no real challenge, and he is certainly no confidant. I saw lady Y/n as an equal" Aemond pauses.

"She was my friend."

Alicent's heart shatters. She had been so caught up in her own problems with you that she had failed to considered her own children.

"I apologise Aemond, truly. I did not realise how much she meant to you." The queen admits rather sheepishly.

"Your Grace, I do not want your apology. Please just ask for her return." Aemond storms off quickly, as if incapable of bearing another second alone with his mother.

Tears well up in Alicent's eyes again, perhaps she had acted too rashly. She decides her children's needs far surpass her own, she will make things right.

--

You were in bed at home, two weeks since leaving King's Landing.

The moment you stepped foot in the Iron Islands you had reverted back to your old self. No longer a Knight of the Queensguard you decided nothing you do now will matter.

You took to the brothels, drinking all hours of the day. Sleeping with every and any whore who will have you. You couldn't allow yourself to think of the Queen, you felt you had to either numb the pain or die from it.

Your head pounding from the night before you reached over to your bedside to grab a cup of water, gulping it down.

Soon you realise you were not alone, another woman naked in your bed. You do not recognise her, you try your hardest to recall the events of last night but to no avail.

The woman turns over in her sleep and moves to wrap her arm around your torso.

Her touch felt repellent, wrong. A suffocating feeling overcoming you. You got out of bed and headed towards the door. You just needed to get out.

--

You found yourself by the sea, the smell of the saltwater had quickly calmed you. However, solitude forced your mind to wander. Inevitably your thoughts settled on Alicent. You did not bother to fight them this time. You found yourself wondering about her. Who she's been with today, if she had eaten, if she has slept. Was she truly content now that you were away?

Her absence, it weighs on you heavily. You feel it in your chest, your entire body aches to be around her, to feel her. The only solace left are your memories of the Queen. This fills you with an overwhelming dread, but you are strangely comforted by the knowledge that you still had the power of your mind to rely on.

"Y/n!" A voice breaks you out your thoughts.

You turn to see your brother, speedily walking towards you. A piece of parchment in his hand.

"Rodrik, what's wrong?"

Your brother doesn't respond but extends his arm to you urging you to grab the letter in his hand.

You looked down at it but didn't move, skeptical.

"Came for you from King's Landing" Rodrik explains.

You wasted not another moment and snatched the parchment from his hands. You tear it open and quickly skimmed its contents, you couldn't believe it. The Queen had written to you.

Dearest Y/n,

I would like to first, extend my apology. Sending you away was an act of impulse on my part. I claim to value duty above all, but I let my emotions guide my judgement and for that I am truly sorry. You have served me well and faithfully. I could not have asked for a more competent Knight. I write in hopes that you will find it in your heart to forgive me, as well as accept your previous post as my sworn guard. Prince Aemond has expressed his unhappiness with my decision to dismiss you. My Helaena has also refused to speak to me properly and grown entirely despondent. Prince Aegon may have not plainly stated his thoughts, however, his dejection is hard to miss. I realise now the grave mistake I have made. The children miss you dearly y/n. I miss you. I ask you to please return to King's Landing and serve me once more, I will do everything in my power to make it worth your while. Do consider my proposal. I anxiously await your reply.

Sincerely,

Your Queen Alicent.

'I miss you'.

You read the letter once more. The Queen's words ignited something deep inside you. You recognise how difficult it must've been for her to write to you. She was vulnerable and she let you see it through this letter.

You stood for a moment deliberating, you had so much love for the Queen's children, even Prince Aegon. He has acted disagreeable in more than one occasion but strangely enough you understood his intentions and he respected you the same.

You let out a sigh. To return to King's Landing is to open yourself up to her again. A great risk you are not sure you could bear to take.

You had entirely forgotten your brother was stood beside you, watching you the entire time until he spoke again.

"Go back to her y/n. You are clearly miserable here. I truly had not seen you half as happy as you were when I visited you serving under the Queen." Your brother expressed truthfully.

"Father will never let me go, Rodrik. He was already hesitant to welcome me back after all that time I spent away from home. If I disobey him again he might disown me entirely."

You were conflicted.

Your heart is asking you to return to your queen but logic and reason is telling you to stay.

"You are wise to worry but let me ask you this, has father once ever acted in your favour? We live our entire lives trying to please him but what has he truly done for us? Did you forget the way he treated our mother? You may be right to want to spare his feelings but I swear y/n, we owe him nothing."

There was truth what your brother said. Your father was a selfish man, never once asked what his children needed. Your mother was a kind woman, her fate doomed when she fell in love with him.

She deserved better.

You deserve better.

You decide you will return to King's Landing.

"Thank you brother, you speak the truth. I will begin my journey back to King's Landing come the morrow." You state genuinely.

A proud smile flashes across his face and you smile at him in return.

---

You found yourself in a screaming match with your father, Lord Dalton. You had just told him of your plans to resume your post as protector of the queen.

"Do think yourself above me, y/n? " Your father accuses.

"Now that you have the Queen asking after you, you think you are allowed to do as you please?" He raises his voice.

You suppress the urge to scoff, Lord Greyjoy and his never ending ability to underestimate you.

"I am a woman grown, father. Therefore entitled to my own decisions."

"I will not let you smother me the way you did my mother." You taunted, knowing the consequence that'll follow. You still couldn't deny how good it felt.

Your father moves to strike you but you quickly dodge it.

He tries to gather himself after failing to hit you, face reddened with anger.

You begin to walk away, no longer possessing the patience to be near him.

He grabs your arm harshly forcing you to stop walking and hear his next words.

"If you decide to leave y/n, do not bother coming back." Your father says before releasing your arm.

You look up at him with a scowl.

"You are no child of mine." He says, tone dripping with disdain.

Being a girl in a family that only consisted of boys, your father's rejection was nothing foreign. You were used to it. You had decided long ago to never seek any sort of validation from him as it only led to your disappointment.

He intended for his words to cut you but you stopped giving him the satisfaction long ago.

You storm off without another word and headed to your rooms.

Morning comes and you swiftly aboard the Greyjoy ship supplied by your brother. You were eternally thankful to have him in your life. Rodrik being the only person in your family who truly cared for you.

He grabs your shoulder, urging you to meet his gaze.

"What is dead may never die."

A saying you were all too familiar with.

You nod, understanding the true meaning behind his words.

"I love you, brother." You say before making your way onto the ship, finally setting sail for King's Landing.

--

You arrive at the Red Keep and were immediately greeted by Aemond and Helaena. The Queen stood by them, at a distance.

Helaena meets your gaze and a large smile flashes across your face. The Princess wasted no time, she runs up to you and pulls you into a tight embrace.

"Don't you ever abandon me like that again Y/n." Haelena exclaims.

You let out a chuckle, a true talent for dramatics. Much like her dear mother.

"I promise that was never my intention Princess. I had rather urgent business in the Iron Islands." You lie, hoping Helaena would lessen the blame on her mother and warm up to her again.

You look up at Alicent as she watches the entire interaction before her. She throws you a genuine smile as a silent 'thank you'. You return it.

Helaena releases you from her grip and you turn your attention to Aemond.

He surprises you by also pulling you into a hug. Albeit, the embrace ended quicker than his sister's but you could feel his sincerity.

"It is good to have you back my lady." Aemond's words were accompanied by a fond smile.

"I must admit I have missed your company my Prince."

"I hope your sparring skills have not waned in my abscene, that would be most dissapointing." You jest as Aemond's smile grows.

"Helaena, we seem to be missing your lord husband, where is he?"

"My best guess, he is still asleep in his chambers. I imagine a long night of whoring in the streets of silk can be terribly depleting" Aemond remarks and Haelena shifts uncomfortably.

"Ah, and here I thought the Prince missed me." You quip, at an attempt to lighten the mood.

"I almost forgot, I have something for you Princess." You watch Helaena's eyes light up immediately.

You pull out a book from your satchel. You came across it wandering the city one night and thought of her. You had plans to gift it to her by raven but circumstances allowed you to now hand it to her in person. 

A book detailing all the organisms and insects that can be found in the Iron Islands. It was rather hefty and informational, not a book you'd personally enjoy but you knew the princess found joy in these things.

Helaena pulls you into an embrace once again and you let out a real laugh this time.

"Thank you. I love it." Heleana admits sincerely and it warms your heart.

Alicent finally walks up to you, a look on her face you can't quite read. Perhaps she's glad you are back but embarrassed she sent you away, you could not truly say for certain.

"Come, Lady y/n must be exhausted from her journey. Let us allow her to rest." Alicent says gesturing to her children.

---

You were laying in bed. You had managed to sleep off most of the journey but now that you are energized it was only hours past dinner time and your duties don't resume until the morrow. Right now, you are left with nothing to do.

Just as you turn over to try and resume your slumber there is a knock at your door. You assumed it to be Ser Criston or one of the handmaidens as nobody else visits you this late.

"Yes? Come in"

The door to your chambers open and the Queen walks in.

You stand up, scrambling to find something to cover up with. You were only in your small clothes and breeches. Eventually finding your robe, you put it on.

"Apologies for my lack of decency Your Grace, I was not expecting company."

The queen gestures for you to relax.

"I will only be here a moment."

"My reason for being here is- Well I wanted to say- I would like to just-". Alicent stutters and you fail to hide your amusement.

Your heart swells at the sight of her stumbling over her words before you. The queen has never seemed so ordinary, so human.

"I must admit, during your arrival earlier today I could not find the proper words. I thought to visit you here and try again but clearly, words are failing me still."

You didn't respond, allowing the auburn haired woman to continue.

"I just wanted to thank you. For coming back. I also wanted to again, extend my apology."

You walked towards the Queen, interrupting her mid sentence.

"I do not need your apology, Your Grace. If I truly held any ill feelings I would not be here."

You extend your hand, placing in on top of Alicent's.

It was indecent, but you needed her to know you truly meant what you were saying.

"I forgive you." You admit, maintaining eye contact with the queen.

You watch as tears well up in her eyes and her gaze softens.

She grabs your hand, intertwining your fingers. The feeling of her hand in yours making your heart skip a beat. You had spent countless nights yearning to touch her again. Now that you are, you feel the urge to pinch yourself just to make sure you weren't dreaming.

Your eyes shift to the Queens lips for a moment and you hear her breath hitch. The air in the room feels thick, your own chest heaving as breathing suddenly became difficult.

You knew you had to step away from her, terminate all physical contact.

Instead, you found yourself leaning in. Your lips crashing into hers.

Alicent lets out a noise in surprise but doesn't make an effort to push you away.

You took this as a sign to keep going. Your hands settling on her waist, you grip it harshly as her own hand grabs the back of your neck in response.

You make quick work of deepening the kiss, your tongue enters her mouth and a  moan spills out of her lips.

The both of you now completely overtaken by desire. You walk Alicent backwards pushing her up against the wall next to the window. You disconnect the kiss, to move your attention to her neck, placing wet kisses against it.

Alicent chokes out another moan, one hand still grabbing your neck her other moves down to the hem of your breeches, roughly pulling you in closer to her. Your hips buck in response and you fight the urge to grind into her as you desperately needed the friction.

You lips finds Alicent's again and this time she takes the opportunity to enter her tongue into your mouth. This sends your body into overdrive. You needed to have her now.

"Y/n" Alicents says breathlessly as soon as your lips disconnected. She was asking you for something but you were unsure. Did Alicent want you to stop? Or did she want you to keep going?

As it seems you were not going to receive your answer as the door to your chambers suddenly flies opens.

You quickly stumble back away from the queen and Alicent pushes herself off the wall trying her best to steady herself.

"So it is true! You are back!" Aegon exclaims sauntering over to you.

You do not respond and instead glanced over at Alicent, she looked slightly dishevelled but otherwise a picture of grace. Her hands clasped over her abdomen, she stands up straight. To the untrained eye, absolutely nothing unseemly has taken place here tonight.

She truly is good at this. You were captivated.

"Oh, hello mother." Aegon says.

"I had only wished to get caught up with my dear friend y/n, it has been entirely too long since I have last seen her." The prince remarks.

Alicent smiles at her son, it does not reach her eyes.

"Ofcourse, I will leave you." Alicent says, stealing a glance at you before walking out.

Shit.

You definitely had gone too far once again. The queen may never want to be near you now.

"Y/n , what do you say? Fancy a walk with me around the city?" Aegon asks you joyfully.

"My prince, it is nearly the hour of the bat. I think its wise I rest before resuming my duties on the morrow."

The prince lets out a groan.

"I will not force you out till late, I promise."

You stare at him, genuinely deliberating.

"Come on, where is that sense of adventure?" He urged one last time.

"Fine. I ought to keep an eye on you anyway. I will meet you outside, I need to dress."

Accomplished smile on his lips, Aegon walks out of your chambers.

You sigh recalling what just happened between you and the queen. Anxiety overcoming you once again. You hated being apart from Alicent and yet entirely dreaded the thought of seeing her in the morning.

Pushing those thoughts aside you choose to focus on Aegon and the time you are about to spend with him. You will have to face the queen again soon enough. You decide there is no point in agonizing over it.

#alicent hightower #alicent x reader #alicent hightower x reader #aemond targaryen #aemond x reader #helaena targaryen #helaena x reader #aegon targaryen #aegon ii targaryen #aegon ii x reader #team green #rhaenicent

[fakewaves]

ok listen i don't have the braincells to write proper fic rn but I still need to get some of my servasha thoughts out of my system and this is my blog no one can stop me i will talk abt these women.

the fact that. both of their relationship with their field of science has been wildly tested by someone they genuinely cared for (cocolia, vache) and it's someone whose influence in their life they've not only come to terms with, but each had to find closure with as seen in their character stories.

like i don't think serval would've stayed on jarilo without finally freeing herself of her cocotrauma the same way natasha would've never truly practiced medicine to her fullest potential while she kept living under vaches shadow.

theyre both incredibly smart and self sufficient but they're also — people — two women that had to face that which at that point shattered their whole worldview and were given no choice but to keep going. natasha for the good of the underworld, and id argue serval for the good of her siblings AND the overworld.

music is a form of healing, after all.

not to mention they 1) have met even if werent given much interaction 2) with serval wishing to return to her work and natasha being in a position of power in the underworld the chances of them having to work together are relatively high to me.

i also think it's cute that they're both sisters. the second natasha and serval start dating, natasha is all over serval's siblings. geppie has to deal with two of them now.

anyway! my takeaway is that them having a relationship is not something they need to heal but it'd be a good, mutual respect and uplifting experience. serval doesn't need natasha to get over cocolia but she'd still enjoy feeling loved again. natasha doesn't need serval to know her worth but having someone reinforce it can to a long way.

theyre good! anyway come talk to me about them if you read this maybe i am absolutely starved

#servasha #honkai star rail #hsr #aster musings #pls i just have so many thoughts of them on my mind if only my brain wasnt so fogged