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l5byrinth · 9 months

Text

dress

“even in my worst times, you could see the best of me”

pairing: cam cameron x fem!reader

summary: in which you and cam have hated each other for as long as you can remember. but what if that hatred wasn’t actually what you thought it was.

warnings: fluff, angst (a little idk), enemies to lovers, lmk if i should add more, not edited

a/n: FINALLY i’m back yall!! i’ll probably disappear for like another few months again but i really had to post this one bc there aren’t enough fics for my bae cam 🫶🏼 and my requests are open!! i don’t want my work copied, translated and/or posted on another platform without it being discussed with me.

my masterlist

Inhale. Exhale.

The nerves were flooding in as you waited for your turn to be ‘presented to society’. Being a debutant and actually participating in the stuff you found nonsense at first was the last thing you expected you’d be doing this summer. What you didn’t expect in a million years either, was falling for the one you sworn you hated with every single part of you.

You couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment it began, but it hit you hard when you heard that Belly broke up with Cam. Thoughts of the two of you being together flooded your mind, and though you tried to push them away, they lingered.

Instead of pursuing these thoughts, you distanced yourself from Cam, which turned out to be more difficult than expected since he seemed to be everywhere you were.

Cam was taken aback by your sudden distance. Although you both disliked each other, you never missed the opportunity to bicker. Now, whenever he tried to engage, you either ignored him or replied formally without any insults.

And if Cam had to be honest, it made him feel this pain in his chest. Especially when you started to hangout him with this guy you had met at the bonfire. The same guy you befriended to try to forget Cam. And also the same guy who was your escort to the debutant ball.

Cam tried to come up with reasons for your distance, and one day, he found himself standing in front of your house. Cam wasn’t sure what he was going to say or do, but he was determined to see you. His heart skipped a beat when he made it to the porch and he halted in front of the door, taking a deep breath in.

He was about to knock, when a thought jumped into his head.

You were scrolling on your phone, trying everything to get Cam out of your head. But everything you saw reminded him of you. You even came past a video of whales and wanted to scream out loud. Why was your phone working against you?

A knock on your window interrupted your furious thoughts and confusion washed over you. You don’t remember meeting up with anyone, or telling someone to come by your window. Scared that it might be a burglar, you grabbed the first object you saw to use as a weapon. However, when you opened your window, the last person you expected was in front of you, heavily panting. “Cameron?” You questioned, lowering your weapon since there wasn’t an actual real threat.

“Hi.” He simply greeted with a grin, before climbing into your room. He stood way too close to you, making your breath hitch as he dusted himself off. But you weren’t going to let him notice what kind of effect he had on you, so the best you could do is just bicker like you used to to mask it.

“What are you doing here? Trying to rob me or something?” You asked as you took a few steps back, “‘Cause I’m not afraid to use this!” You showed the bedside table lamp in your hands.

“Calm down, Y/l/n,” He chuckled as he put his hand on your arm to lower it, and you just allowed him to do so. You felt yourself relax at the warmth and touch of his hand and mentally cursed yourself for this. He liked at you with a small smile, a smile that made your heart flutter in your chest.

Cam’s hand lingered on your arm, before he cleared his throat and quickly removed it. Around everyone, he was always shy and reserved, but with you it was different. You brought out some confidence in him he never knew he had. And Cam never understood why, but with you, he felt at ease and weirdly enough, safe. Whenever he even looked in your direction, his worries would vanish as if they never existed.

Cam walked past you slowly and looked around your room. He tried to memorise every object on your desk, every little detail in your room. “Why are you ignoring me?” He asked, throwing his head over his shoulder to look at you. You were standing there at loss for words, trying to come up with a good excuse. He nodded to himself when you didn’t answer before continuing his walk around your room.

“I should be asking you the questions! Why are you in my room, Sextus?” You crossed your arms over chest and watched him let out a laugh at the name you called him. The sound made you burst of out happiness, but you weren’t planning on showing.

“Please, Ceres, be honest with me…” He started walking back towards you slowly, his eyes never leaving yours. The way he remembered the name you used at the latin convention made your heart skip a beat. “Why would I?” You said with a loud huff and you turned your head to the side with your eyes closed.

When you opened your eyes, Cam’s face was only an inch from yours, and you felt your guard fall down. It would’ve been so much easier if Cam didn’t have this effect on you. Your face fell. “Stop.” You mumbled, inaudible for him to hear.

“What was that?” He inquired genuinely, getting even closer if that was even possible. “Stop!” You spoke out louder, making him jump out of his skin, but soft enough for it to be a whisper. “Stop what?” Cam asked curiously. You stared into his eyes, trying to find something, think of something to make you hate him again. But as you looked into his deep eyes, all you could think about what you could be, as something else than enemies.

You looked at the ground in defeat, before continuing, “I’m trying so hard, Cameron, so hard.”

Cam was quiet as he looked at you with a confused look on his face, and he wanted you to tell him everything that was on your mind. When you looked up at him, Cam noticed that there was something else in your eyes. Something else than what he usually saw, and he couldn’t quite place what it was. “Cameron, I’m trying so hard not to hate you.” You whispered.

Cam’s heart was pounding out of his chest, while he was looking at you with his mouth agape ever so slightly. He hoped your words meant what he thought they meant, and his hand reached for yours.

A yell of your name woke both you and Cam out of your trance, eyes widening in panic. “Is everything okay up there?” Your mom yelled from downstairs, and you heard her footsteps coming up the stairs. Cam rushed towards your window, and you helped him get out quickly. Before he got down, he said something that you spent thinking about the weeks that followed, “I’m really trying hard to hate you too, but I can’t. No matter how hard I try.”

Ever since he dropped by, you had avoided him more than you initially did. And that made Cam wonder what he did or said wrong that day. You were all what he could think about, and if he wasn’t thinking about you, he was dreaming about you or speaking about you.

Whenever you saw him, you would walk the other way, you would pretend you didn’t see him standing. You basically ignored his existence. And for Cam it felt like a stab through the heart, a deep and painful one.

This continued until the debutant ball.

Cam was standing on the flight of stairs behind two other escorts and in front of many others, waiting for the girl’s name he was escorting to be announced. He didn’t know how he ended up here, escorting a girl, who he didn’t even really knew that well, to the debutant ball, But he would do anything to keep his mother happy, so here he was.

He was nervously fidgeting with his fingers, his mind on you like it always has been since the first time he saw you. A part of him wished it was you he was escorting. He wished that he was the one who first saw you in your dress before your presentation.

He fantasised how he actually wanted this day to go. You standing there in a beautiful dress, looking drop-dead gorgeous like you always did. Him being the one to look at you with an encouraging smile and mouthing to you how enchanting you looked. It was all you deserved and more. It killed him he wasn’t the one to be doing it.

When it was Cam’s to turn to go up stage and escort the girl, he imagined it was you by his side. He flashed her a polite smile as she did the same and watched as her eyes drifted off to behind him. Cam followed her eyes and saw that she was looking at none other than the guy who was escorting you.

Cam and the girl got off the stage and walked over to the other debutants, waiting for the next debutant to be presented. And when your name was called, Cam felt a heavy flutter in his chest he most certainly couldn’t ignore.

The girl beside him watched his demeanour change at the sound of your name and smiled to herself. She always had the feeling Cam had a thing for you.

When you appeared on stage, Cam’s eyes were drawn to you. The way you looked in your dress was indescribable and the way you glowed made his heart race a million miles per hour. You scanned the crowd, trying to find a familiar face to ease your nerves. And when your eyes locked Cam’s warm ones it felt as if the world stopped turning. Every single person around you disappeared, it was just you and him.

And your nerves disappeared as quickly as they appeared.

You never pulled your eyes away from his gaze as you walked down the stage with your escort. The escort who had picked up on your crush on Cam a long while back.

Cam tried his best to keep his composure, he was refraining himself from running over to you and holding you like there was no tomorrow, he tried his best not to think about all the ways he would compliment you and make you feel good.

You and your escort halted in front of the table your parents were sitting at and you finally broke eye contact with Cam. Your heart was pounding out of your chest and you were thinking about Cam all the damn time as you waited for the presentations to finish.

When they did, every debutant with their escort bowed down to the table with their family. Afterwards, everyone sat down and waited for some surprise performance the escorts were giving. Your escort waited for you to take a seat next to one of your parents, before he parted as well after flashing you a small smile.

“You looked amazing, honey.” Your mom praised, putting a hand on your shoulder. You thanked her and looked around the ball room, trying to find the one person who lived in your mind rent free. Cam was just walking past to get to the other escorts, when his eyes met yours once again. But this time you looked away after a few seconds, trying to nonchalantly brush off the fact you had a major crush on the guy you had thought was your number one enemy.

After the sudden dance performance, your escort had disappeared somewhere, along with the girl Cam was escorting. But neither of you seemed to care, as all you did was gaze at each other longingly, waiting for the people to announce when the first dance was about to take place.

Your parents, who were seated beside you, had noticed your stares and stolen glances towards the boy and smiled at each other knowingly. You tried to hide it, but they knew you. They knew when their daughter was actually in love.

The sound of glass clinking was heard, before a woman announced that it was time. And at that moment you woke up from your trance, realising your escort was still nowhere to be seen. Every debutant, alongside with her escort was gathering on the dance floor, except for you and, well, Cam.

“Mom, where is he?” You questioned worriedly. “It doesn’t matter,” She answered, making your eyebrows furrow in confusion, “I think there’s someone else you’d much rather want to share this dance with.”

She tilted her head towards a certain direction, and you knew immediately who she was referring to. But your eyes followed the direction she meant anyway, with a racing heart.

Cam was standing there, looking at you like a man in love. That’s because he is. He is in love. And before you knew it, your feet made their way towards him. You halted in front of him with a smile. You were panting like you had just run a marathon, but you didn’t care, because you were right in front of who you wanted to be.

“Seems like we both don’t have a dance partner, huh?” Cam chuckled, scratching the back of his neck nervously. All you could do was nod in respond, the words you actually wanted to speak out seeming to be stuck in your throat.

Your hands reached for his and when your fingers intertwined, you could’ve sworn you heard Cam let out a deep breath. The music started playing, and the two of you were drowning in one another’s eyes as you danced to the music just like you had practiced. The tension between the two of you was unbearable throughout the entire dance.

And once the dance ended, when you were in the end position, his face was awfully close to yours and you had to do anything in your power to not plant your lips on his. He pulled you back up, with way more force than he intended, which resulted into you being flush against his chest. Your faces only a few inches away, which made it even harder to refrain yourself.

You pulled away slowly, even when you wish you could stay like that forever. The words you desired to speak were stuck in your throat, and your eyes fell down, feeling flustered by everything that has happened this night. He wanted to say so much as he looked at you with a lovesick smile, but he didn’t know how. His right hand fine yours as he put his left hand under your chin.

He stroked your cheek gently with his thumb, his eyes fixated you and only you. You were the only thing that mattered to him any day, anywhere, anytime.

Every couple around you started to leave the dance floor, but you and Cam stayed there without a care in the world. “Let’s get out of here.” He whispered, in which you grinned to in response.

He gave your hand a gentle squeeze as you walked towards the exit of the ball room, giggles and chuckles leaving your lips. Your parents watched from afar, knowing you were finally with the one you liked all along.

#cam cameron x reader #cam cameron #the summer i turned pretty #fluff #angst with a happy ending #enemies to lovers #conrad fisher #david iacono #jeremiah fisher #steven conklin

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chiquititaosita · 4 months

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vale valeee 🫣

so, i was thinking, you know how when we get mad, we speak our native tongue? so like, i wanted to request monster trio + law getting yelled at by reader in spanish

(you know how moms be like “ve hacer tal cosa” and we either forget and do it wrong or forget to do it at all?? bueno, reader tells them to help them out with something y como no lo hicieron, reader starts complaining and yelling about “yo hago todo aqui” 🤭)

les da miedito pero la verdd les gusta el matrato 😫

(mentira 👀) idk if that makes sense pero if it doesn’t i can elaborate more ☺️

a/n: OMFG YESSS!!! and I wrote like a slight Drabble for it! On sanjis nickname post oml

˗ˏˋ꒰🍓꒱ yelling at monster trio + law in spanish

˗ˏˋ꒰🍓꒱ Luffy

- if he’s not being serious, or something which is all the damn time

- Consider it’s your job to be like a certain mother figure besides his amor

- first it was the gentle parenting technique,

- “Luffy, can you please move your feet im trying to scrub the deck ?” Y/n is looking over at him, trying to be patient

-“sorry y/n can’t talk rn! Maybe later!!” Luffy will then mess up your whole cleaning

-you didn’t mind it.

-But the then there’s him trying to help you, when you don’t need help.

- “Luffy did you and ussop take out the trash like sanji asked y’all too?” You ask him as you’re trying to make some

-he’s nowhere to be found when you ask him this. but then after

-“ah ah ah! ¡Lávate las manos, Cabron!!” You’ll slap Luffys hands and speak in a semi- stern tone but in a calm manner when he tries to eat the carnitas you have.

-“come on just a little bite babeeee!!!/——“

-“NO!” You’ll explode and the whole ship hears you. You’re so angry and tired of trying from being stressed out.

-“I have to do everything around here god damn it! Please just help me with shit if you want to be a good boyfriend por favor!!” Y/n is just thankful to have some shit being done.

-“NOW HELP ME OR YOURE NOT GETTING MY PORTIONS OF FOOD!!” Then he IMMEDIATELY STARTS TO UNINTENTIONALLY CLEAN THE DECK AND HELP SORT OUT HIS LAUNDRY… let’s be honest luffy never does his laundry

˗ˏˋ꒰🍓꒱ zoro

-will instantly yell back at you

- “y/n why are you mad at me!?”

- “YOU BROKE THE LAUNDRY BASKET!”

-“IT WAS IN THE WAY WHEN I WAS TRAINING!!”

- you slap him and groan mumbling you have to do shit. You’re not even going to complain with him right now

- that is until a couple of hours later some random ass bitch at the bar y’all were at, was literally trying to pick a fight with zoro. And talk shit. And you were sober the whole time.

-“HIJOLE a chingada wey!! Nobody talks shit about my man but me!!” You slap the guy with a chancla aiming like a super Latina mom. And literally defend your moss head novio whose found a nice sleeping place, sitting down.

-“NOW YOU YOU NEED TO LEARN HOW TO WIPE AMD CLEAN THE TOILET BEFORE YOU FLUSH MR!”

-“Y/n you’re embarrassing me!-“

-“I DONT GIVE A RATS ASS IF IM EMBARRASSING YOU! I ONLY ASK YOU TO DO ONE THING ONE THING!! AND YOU BARELY DO”

-he’s picking you up and you’re kicking his chest to put him down.

˗ˏˋ꒰🍓꒱ sanji

- “Y PUTA ALA MADRE WEY!!” You’ll be storming out angry. if sanji sees you angry it’s best for him to not try and ask…

- he’s learned the hard way.

-“VINSMOKE SANJI!!” You know when a Hispanic woman yells your government legal name, you’re fucked

-“Yes Mon amour??” He’d asked you in a kind manner

-“why isn’t the FLOOR MOPPED!?”

-MALE WIFE.EXE ACTIVATED

- the last time he talked back to you he cried, and begged for forgiveness like down on his knees and holding your legs.

-“Aye cabron get off!!! i forgive you i’m just telling you next time to use fabuloso.”

- he finds it adorable when you’re mad and punched your cheeks

-you’ll bite his finger and he’s gonna be like. “OW!!”

-“beloved what’s wrong?”

-silent treatment and he has to start guessing and do everything around the house. but really it’s because she’ll only yell at him without her goodbye kiss. or her love letters on the napkin with her liquado (smoothie en español de tex-mex)

˗ˏˋ꒰🍓꒱ Law

-oh hell no

-he forgets what he signed up for.

- “CALLATE WEY!!!” The minute you throw a chancla at his head he’s not even pissed he’s just laughing because you got him good

- “shut up for one minute will you y/n-ya.” He regrets it. You start causing a scene and then embarrass him, if his crew steps in. They’re not gonna like it they just say out of it.

-last time penguin almost lost a finger. While doing the chores. Doing the laundry’s and cooking.

-“ NO YOU LISTEN TO ME GOD DAMN IT!!!! MOTHER FUCKER WHO HATES IT WHEN HIS FOOD IS TOUCHING BY A SMIDGE!”- you grab him by the ear. “Ugh I have to do everything for him.”

-“oh really?” Law would reply out of frustration, and throwing you over his shoulders just to fuck some sense into you. Because you got mad you needed dick in his office. Now you’re still complaining, because his room office is a mess.

#monster trio x reader #law x y/n #law x latina! reader #monster trio x Hispanic! reader #˗ˏˋ꒰🐄 ꒱ one piece x reader #˗ˏˋ꒰🐄꒱ one piece imagines #˗ˏˋ꒰ 👹 ꒱ monster trio #˗ˏˋ꒰🕊️ ꒱ sanji #˗ˏˋ꒰🗡️ ꒱ zoro #˗ˏˋ꒰☠️ ꒱ luffy #˗ˏˋ꒰🩺 ꒱ law #monster trio x hispanic reader #༊*·˚ ositas master list #one piece x latina! reader #ੈ♡˳ one piece x latina reader

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myloveforhergoeson · 10 days

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wait actually thinking more about that follower gap post, what is the tasw universe btr fandom's feelings towards roxy? i guess we see a bit of it in the tour letters chapter, and hopefully more in big time contest? are they public at this point? is she, as a girl their age on the team, being shipped with any other member?

hi!! the answer to this is simultaneously simple and complicated. as usual i have a long answer for you!

in short: no, btr fandom doesn’t know more than she’s their touring guitarist and if they did some research they’d find her listed as the writer on many of their songs. james and roxy aren’t public and there’s a few reasons why! as far as the fandom is aware, she just works with the band. after carlos told her he loved her at that one show tho some people might think they’re cute together but more on that later

in long: ah! i’ve already tried to incorporate this in so many ways and i have not found a way i like quite yet. i’ve set many little things up - you are so right about the letters chapter! rox makes a comment about getting some boos when carlos kisses her because we all know what fandom typically does to women who date guys in boybands 😭 in roxy’s birthday chapter, she and james get stopped in santa monica and people start taking pictures of him and he throws his coat over her head and pulls her away from the pier because of some “media training” he said he got from gustavo. jo mentions the same thing happening to her while she was out with kendall before the pair were forcibly made public by her publicist (which is also briefly mentioned; skipped that ep bc i didn’t like the sneaker storyline sorry!) so there’s little crumbs im attempting to put in here and there i just can’t decide what to do with them. i thought about adding another section onto the minnesota chapter where roxy convinces her old boss to let her have her show again for a night where she can “interview” (read: fuck around with her boyfriend in the radio studio for four hours) james and he’d forget to turn his mic off before calling her babe or something and accidentally make their relationship public but 1) the chapter was already way too long and 2) like what do i do then. write an even longer chapter the next time around to fix what i wrote previously? i do not have the same time i used to when i started writing this to just get down like 20 pages a night LMAO. i loveeeee writing don’t get me wrong but it’s just hard for me currently and low interaction on original portions of the story are not very motivating. (but i’m not writing for the engagement don’t worry! it’s just a bonus!!!)

so yeah like it’s THERE it’s just not there.

besides. i want james and roxy to have a conversation about it too but i think he’s probably tweaking out about it bc of gustavo’s “training” and she would love to be public i just don’t think she understands what being in the spotlight really means and she doesn’t want to come off as too pushy because he hasn’t brought it up. neither of them really know what to expect from a public relationship with a public figure. but i mean. they’re out to their friends and stuff obviously! so maybe that might come back to bite them in the butt later idk. i have literally so many thoughts about this i promise itll be in there at some point i just don’t know when :)

i imagine at this point in time the band members each have like the lower end of a 60-100k follower count? i really have no basis for this though. i’ll have to give it some more thought!

tysm for your question eeee!! love seeing things tagged rames on my dash :) <3

#thats all she wrote fic #ash talks tasw #:)))!!!

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pepsiiwho · 7 months

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Thank u for rb-ing the ask game. Here are 5000 asks: ♥️, 🎁 , 👓, 💕, 🍬, and 💌. These are just for you to keep: 💖💓💓♥️💞💕💘💞💘💗❤️💘💘♥️💖💓💖❤️💖💞💓💞💖💗

So many things here should I even answer this in one big thing....

This one is getting it's own post I have too much to say for it but the short answer is "[sound here] sounded like rocks hitting a wall" if you actually read my work you should know this one it's my calling card at this point.

It gets long after this sorry guys

2. This one isn't anything you'd like, a shame I just sent it to you but here's a little piece of the most recent WIP I have as of (checks watch) 3 hours ago. BG3 WIP Title pending.

The woman walks out with her tail between her legs, literally, and Alabaster watches the door close soundlessly behind her as if commanded. The silence between them sits for a moment a second or two before Alabaster speaks. “She's pretty. You might have a type though.” “What are you doing here?” She didn’t think a sleep-ruffled Astarion would be the one she’d be interacting with when she decided to pay a visit today, but the sight is pleasing all the same. His hair is as white as it’s ever been, only a touch longer. She isn’t sure if actual vampires are capable of being surprised (something something the alertness of darkness or something) but the expression on Asraion’s face was what she would coin as ‘your lover coming home to see you with your mistress' . “You missed me?” He asks. It doesn’t come out like a question, as breathy as it sounds. “I missed you” She responds. She rolls her shoulders, getting ready for the dance that is talking to Astarion. “I also need your help.” “You came back because you need me?” There's a sharp smile slowly making it’s way onto his face, laughlines bending to build the expression. He’s sitting up, moving to reach her height. She nods, pulling at the tightly wound strings in his chest, plucking absently. “I need you.” She responds. Talking to him feels like playing an instrument you haven't touched in a long time, slowly allowing muscle memory to take over so the music can once again be moved by your masterful hands. He smiles full now, as if realizing something she doesn’t know, and she’s reminded that you never really forget how to tune an instrument.

3. What helps me focus when I write... booty shaking music for throwing ass OR hating whatever is happening around me. no in-between.

4. This is a really hard question because if we mean like, emotionally? I could cop out and give a three way tie between Complimentary Soap (it isn't good I'm just nostalgic), Nintendo Direct (Circa June 2021) (it is good and I'm nostalgic) and Like A Brick In The Wall (good and new but god it's chaptered.) But, right now I'm gonna say my most recent fic I posted Going Home; All Over Again. I really love it even tho no one will ever read it (save you). The curse of rare pairs.

5. Okay another long one let's go. I'm only counting things with multiple pics posted...

HADES -

I Missed You Terribly And Like A Dream— You Appeared, Smiling At Me, Just So

Most of my stuff from here isn't good anymore, and while there's another that's more self indulgent and scratches the itch inside my body that aches dully for more Hypnos content at all times, this one reads the best rn. So it win.

HAIKYUU-

Tequilas, Margaritas and Seawater

everything in this fandom is old and arguably bad so nostalgia points carry weight here. This. one was a gift and idk why but it reads amazingly. holds up still

FE3H -

Like A Brick In The Wall

All fe fics are the DEVIL because of any in this list I CARE about these the most no competition. Anyway. This fic didn't win the previous bracket of my fav fic ever but it is my fav in the tag. Don't ask me to explain. I'm sorry.

CSM -

I Squint Out My Peripheral, Peaking Through My Fingers To See You

I don't work here man... I hate this goddamn pic its so good.

DRV3-

Nintendo Direct (Circa June 2021)

She's gonna do it every time... V3 hospital au I lOVE you.

(Listing out my written fandoms like this is the saddest thing ever my GOD I'm cringey)

6. I feel like the tropes I love most I never write myself... it's honestly kinda fandom specific but across the board...? Royalty au. not regency but kinda. A little to the left.

#the funnies #there's so many fandom here I'm not tagging it #read my pics and comment #fanfiction #read it do it #plwease

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my-strange-attraction · 7 months

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Man people really do be straw-manning you and then interpreting all of your arguments in the worst faith possible and acting like that makes them So Smart And Correct. I’m sorry you gotta deal with all these bozos with zero reading comprehension or critical thinking skills. Just wanna add because it’s been seriously bothering me and I don’t remember you ever bringing it up: one of the core tenets of the original op’s post that you responded to was basically ‘this identity is bad because I’m a lesbian and those people aren’t lesbians in the exact same way as me so they’re hurting the lesbian community because I don’t want to see them when they don’t share all of my experiences and (gasp!) talk about men and their relationship to men sometimes because *I* don’t want to hear about men’ and I just. Idk man if that’s what his argument boils down to its kind of a shitty argument. Even ignoring all of the terf rhetoric (which you correctly pointed out) I can’t even begin to understand why someone would want to be in a queer community where everyone fits into neat little boxes and everyone with your label experiences their orientation exactly like you. Aren’t they forgetting that the whole point of the queer community is that larger society attempted to put us in boxes we didn’t want to be in and categorize us into labels and lifestyles we didn’t want? Why would someone ever parrot the actions of our oppressors and do that to other queer people, when they know what it feels like? I can’t even fathom being that selfish and closed minded

>your argument is chock full of straight up lies Love how this was said in response to your rebuttal of an argument that CONTAINED ITS OWN “STRAIGHT UP LIES”!! Like pot meet kettle lol. Specifically referring to that one bit that was like “uwu bi women tried really hard on purpose to distance themselves from the lesbian community” because that is straight up not what happened!! I haven’t said anything yet but it’s been bothering me for a while and that one ask has so much fucking Audacity that I couldn’t stop myself from Pointing It Out this time. Ahistorical bullshit and they’re accusing YOU of lying. The audacity of it all I can’t

Anyway these guys are just mad that bi lesbians get more bitches than they EVER will. I heart bi lesbians I love you bi lesbians I hope y’all stay winning mwah <3

I'm assuming these are all from the same person because of the timing? If not, sorry for not doing separate responses.

Yeah, this whole thing has been pretty frustrating to be honest. In a way it's even worse than actual terfs, because these are people who are philosophically not that different than I am, and if we met in real life we probably wouldn't even know that we disagree. I mean, I do talk sometimes about label anarchy with some of my friends, but we have to be close and you have to get me in a philosophical mood. It's really frustrating to be openly disrespected as a person for one opinion that, though it does happen to be really important to me, doesn't come up in my everyday life (or, likely, theirs either).

The whole pronoun thing really got to me too. I KNOW they were just strawmanning, and I KNOW it wasn't really a valid critique of anything I said, but the suggestion that I would even consider purposely using the wrong pronouns for someone is upsetting. I don't think he even noticed before an anon pointed it out as a way to invalidate my argument. I don't think it upset him (or the anon) as much as the anon said it did. I still apologized though because I'm not going to not apologize for using the wrong pronouns.

Also I know jack shit about history because it doesn't stay in my break but yeah actually I do remember reading about that! That's crazy, I can't believe they called me a liar when they don't know their history. I mean, I don't either, but at least I'm honest about it.

Thanks so much for sending these messages! Not gonna lie, I was going a bit crazy with all this and the only anons I was getting until now have been the hate ones that I've shared and a few hate ones that I just outright deleted. I know people agree with me because I've seen the likes on my posts, but it's nice to have someone defending me as well, so thank you <3

#ask #labels #queer #identity #cloudy rambles

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lionofstone · 2 years

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Malevolent Part 25 reaction post bc my friend who listens to it is asleep and i don’t want to spam them so i’m compiling my thoughts here so i can send one message lets gooooo

all i’ve been told is that there are ‘sweet moments’ in the first ten minutes so i am :))

arthur talking about farou </3

“a bleeding heart is only going to get us killed” AH

“we need to stay mindful of this, of us.” they’re an us.... my venom bias is showing again lol

“don’t be disappointed that we didn’t help them” “i’m disappointed that you don’t seem to care” AHH JOHN IS BECOMING HIS TETHER TO HUMANITY,,,, they are swapping roles,,,,

“have you ever picked a lock like this” “i may have, yes” listen ik this is probably Private Investigator Related but my brain did in fact go “criminal arthur 👀” so. yknow.

“we’re not like other people are we” OH AH that line is made for me... the way he sounds when he says it... AHHHH

when arthur and john work together 😭😭😭😭

yes that is literally the plot of the whole podcast yes it still gets me every time

“i am glad you’re surviving for us” :((((

john is literally so sweet he’s trying so hard to be Good and Kind and Human and i adore him

this is also the ‘sweet moment’ quinn mentioned i am sure

“arthur you fucking did it!!” i love when he celebrates he is everything to me

they are being Awkward with each other and it’s very entertaining but also i am Worried i want them to have an actual conversation again please i like when they talk about their feelings

i’m so focused on the arthur & john dynamic that i just. forget to pay attention to the plot

every time they’re like “oh what should we do? which direction?” i’m like. yeah there’s the patreon choice. there it is. idk if i’ll ever join the patreon bc i think it’s fun to have no idea & also interacting with the story feels like it would break suspension of disbelief (for me) (unless it eventually Came Up in the narrative a la Bandersnatch) (but this is just a personal preference)

“there was a time when [bloody footprints] would’ve chilled me to the bone” arthur my guy you were a private investigator??? presumably you were in crime scenes at least occasionally???? also u killed a man in episode one (ok like technically john did but you were Very Close)

“the cold has taken me” “i can’t feel as much” “it’s nothing that doesn’t come with experience, i suppose” once again: they are swapping places!!! arthur feels less human!!!!

also i am glad they are talking about emotions again <3

“i never thought you’d be cold” :(

“i am not a callous man, john” “i’m saying your words are taken to heart”

“really?” “yes!” i love when they Communicate <3 besties <3

John demanding answers about their time apart ahhhhhhhh

“tell me everything” YEAH

(also whenever they do these ‘recaps’ i can’t help but think that it’s a clever way of helping the audience along since it’s usually about a month between episodes which is A While but also the recaps just. make sense in universe so i’m never too mad about it)

arthur always talks about them going home together and it makes me :)

john asking “how do you picture that” and arthur answering with practical things like getting a car etc etc AHHH it’s so !!!!! bc i def interpreted that question as john being more like “what happens to us/me when you go back home/to your life” and arthur answered it like it was “how do you think we’d manage the journey” and it’s just. good good emotion soup

like on one hand i think it’s arthur subconsciously being like “we’re going to stick together ofc” bc that’s not in question for him but on the other i’m like. arthur. please do some reflection and then use your words

WHY DID THAT “WHO ARE YOU TALKING TO” MAKE ME JUMP SO BAD

this voice sounds So Scared

Matthew ahhh

“who are you talking to” “no one” :(((

“tell us—tell me” arthur is so bad at pretending to be a single person

“i’m not supposed to tell you...yet” UH MATTHEW? WTF DOES THAT MEAN?

arthur interrogating matthew makes me really sad for some reason

i think bc there was a time when arthur would’ve opened the door no question

“some seek a power they never had and some people seek power they once did” that’s a very good line

why is john so panicked about getting information about new york did i miss something

“HIS EYES ARE BLEEDING ARTHUR”

DID MATTHEW JUST EXPLODE

DID HE JUST

ALKFHAG ????

“his head split in two” YEAH I GATHERED THAT THANKS JOHN

and ofc they’re fighting again <//3

“arthur...” “i know. you don’t know.”

john is so gentle with arthur in his tone

“what a waste” “...a waste?”

“a man is dead, arthur.” john :(

ahhh like on one hand i’m enjoying arthur’s corruption arc but on the other i miss when he was kind & and john was leaning from him

i do love a good role reversal i’m just also Worried about what’s going to happen to them & their dynamic yknow

OOOH THREE SOLDIERS i love when things Connect

“the coin i flipped—” “what?” PLEASE JUST EXPLAIN THINGS TO JOHN ARTHUR PLEASE HE DESERVES TO KNOW AND MAYBE HE CAN HELP YOU

“matthew said he wasn’t part of it—” “who?” ARTHUR 🔪

“they needed help” “so do we!” ARTHUR 🔪 🔪 🔪

“this is how we stop them!” “is it?”

“HOW EXACTLY WAS YELLOW THE MONSTER BETWEEN YOU TWO” GET HIM JOHN!!!!!

“BECAUSE HE WAS JUST LIKE YOU” ARTHUR I AM COMING FOR YOUR KNEES

PARASITE PARASITE??????????? wtf i am so :(

“too inconsequential to exist on his own” ARTHUR WTF

like..... is that not exactly what the king in yellow was getting at?? essentially??? “oh john shouldn’t be on his own he needs to be part of the whole” like??? ARTHUR WTF HOW DARE YOU

john bitterly describing things i am :(

“arthur” “what” “i’m glad i’m not like you”

“the feelings mutual”

HI HOW TF AM I SUPPOSED TO WAIT ANOTHER MONTH FOR CLOSURE ON THAT ONE

remember what i said about not getting patreon? i am second guessing that now ajfgkaasfkjgs

i am feeling a lot of terrible emotions

quinn i hate u for getting me into this podcast but also tysm <3 mixed bag with me

gonna just. go back to listening to you call it madness (i call it love) on repeat bc that provides Happier Thoughts

devastated rn

#malevolent #malevolent podcast #ljs life #gonna insane over this podcast but what else is new

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vinmauro · 1 year

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wip search game

i was tagged by @quinnkeerys thank you!! my words are: sweet, deal, touch, wish, secret. i currently only have 3 wips so let’s see how this goes. forgot to post this the other day and have since finished the last chapter of don’t so this is my celebration.

from tied me to you (cheerscoops part 1)

In effort to forget about Chrissy Cunningham and her stupid smile, her stupid hair, Steve headed straight bore the backyard. Instantly met with cheers and immediately asked if he’ll raise his personal keg stand record. With a quick look at the keg and the guys surrounding it, the charming smile he’s known for slipped on and he gave one nod. “Fuck it, let’s do it.” King Steve does what King Steve does best. Later he ended up in bed with someone he’d never see again and it didn’t bother him. Truthfully, it doesn’t. By the beginning of November, Chrissy was out of his mind and replaced with another sophomore. Someone equally as warm and sweet, with sharper angles but beautiful eyes, a shy smile. She cares about school and grades and doing well. She’s so much better than any cheerleader. Nancy Wheeler felt right.

from cos you live in my daydreams (jargyle)

Did he? Things don’t feel the same anymore and Jonathan liked to believe it just had to do with the move, missing their friends and Hawkins, and that they’re going through the same trauma that he is. They’re still healing and maybe it’ll be a long while before anything will feel close to how they used to feel. El was still trying to get used to not having her powers and dealing with the loss of Hopper, all while trying to navigate high school and being a kid. Will is more withdrawn, missing his friends but it’s something more than that. Jonathan may see that they’re struggling but he’s finding it hard to reach out. Because a part of him wants to withdraw too.

from tied me to you

But nothing could ever touch Richard Harrington. Not even after getting caught with his assistant, Julie, and it’s why Steve’s mother can’t leave Richard alone on work trips. Richard Harrington is perfect. So his family had to be too. Fuck perfect, Harrington, live a little. Tommy’s voice wheedled into him, with a laugh and a shit-eating grin while Carol’s was milder, a pop of gum for emphasis while her laugh grated him. There is no angel that lives on Steve’s shoulders. He had a devil and a devil and they were apparently in love with each other.

from the last chapter of don’t don’t don’t throw it away (edancy)

*wish came up 4 times just from eddie’s pov. “Shit.” He scrambled getting up, not bothering to pick up any of their stuff, “hey! Come on. Where are you going?” “Away from you before I decide to kill you,” luckily she had stopped walking shortly after speaking, leaving them to be coated in darkness, the music barely reaching them. He wished he could see her properly. “You’re a fucking idiot, you know that?”

from the last chapter of don’t

*secret came up three times in this chapter Instead, Holly had been the one who had pulled the whole thing into light. She had grown attached to Eddie after their one time hang out, evident enough to Nancy whenever she would ask and often reminded Holly not to say anything in front of their mother. It was supposed to be a secret between sisters. Well, six year olds aren’t the best secret keepers in the world. She asked, rather loudly, if Eddie would be coming to Nancy’s graduation dinner. All while Karen was still holding on her hand and Eddie had walked up at the same moment.

tagged: @stargyles @iero @willaferreyras @rejectofsociety and if you feel like doing this at all just feel free to say i tagged you!! idk who writes anymore bc i’m self absorbed 💀

your words are: alone, control, pieces, home, stay

#acey writes #anyway i feel very 🥺 abt tagging so don’t feel the need to do anything

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rolling-restart · 1 year

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Hey, I'm the one who was unnecessarily worried about her English skills yesterday and I promised to come back. Here I am hehe.

Firstly, I’d love to claim an emoji, I love the idea and I’m planing on staying here on the journey of desecration as I already love it so much.

Can I be the ☂️?

Okay, so I read 🌻’s thoughts on the teaser of chapter 13 and your response to it and couldn’t stop thinking about the fact that rich or super rich people are pretty much able to do and get whatever they want. We do keep forgetting this a lot since we obviously don’t just hire someone to take care of a person we just abused.

It helps getting a better view of how fucked up it all is (not that we don’t already know) but it’s a nice reminder of power and the kind of guy Toto is in this story.

It also makes so much sense that he might have gotten George spied on sometimes. It fits perfectly to everything you said in your character study of Toto like this sentence:

He sabotages George by not letting him free to choose a different way than he dictates and then by hating him for it.

The fixer or whatever she might be called is an interesting add. These kind of people know a lot, they see a lot, they can become very important if they choose to leave the passive side of letting things be..

Toto said he would come back. Was he still mad? Why wasn’t he there instead of a stranger? Was he afraid of facing his handiwork?

I’m looking at this part in two ways. George may not be in a state that we consider good or healthy or let’s say on the way out of the „relationship“ he’s in but he’s still asking questions in his mind.

If he could go from questioning whether Toto is afraid of facing his „handiwork“ to realising and processing it fully, in a way that’s not „Why isn’t he here?“ That’d be great. Well, I guess I have to have a lot of patience with George’s inner conflicts and that’s what makes it realistic.

Let me just say, while I don’t like that he’s so almost vacant right now, it still shows us so much of him.

He didn’t want to inconvenience anyone and that lady sounded upset.

This is so sad! You definitely manage the art of making the reader want to go up to the character and shake sense into them while we all know very well that it would not work at all. :’)

Hi dear, firstly quick psa. Speaking proper english is overrated and language shaming is actually a very harmful thing. As a person who had to learn 2-3 languages in her life and always felt the pressure of speaking them in the most correct way possible, I figured out that the internal pressure mostly about a systematic cycle of abuse that makes us feel ashamed. Idk, it’s very important for people to understand that. Anyway…

Emoji added to your pinned post! I am glad that you are planning to stay!!

So as I mentioned, I read a reddit thread recently talking about the stuff rich people buy that we don’t even know exist and that really inspired this whole fixer scheme. The fact that Toto doesn’t choose to overpower him at all times doesn’t mean that he couldn’t if he wanted to.

This is something I saw while looking for inspo for Nico. It was about his relationship with his team mate at the time, Michael but I think it also fits well with George/Toto.

I am very intriguied by our fixer, I haven’t developped and oc in this story yet but I did it in other projects in the past so I am half confident. Do we want our fixer to be more involved?

I think the reason why it is very hard for George to get rid of his tunnel vision comes from him believeing that Toto loves him, that he is nothing without Toto and he has no actual real worth without what Toto provides for him. I think this action could be a huge blow to this mindset because if he actually loved him, he would be there to help him. He feels like he lost everything by losing Toto’s good graces so this can empower him to actually discover what he has regarding self value outside of Toto’s all consuming presence. To him, he is abandoned by Toto even in reality, Toto wouldn’t leave him that easy because he is actually all Toto has.

Let me explain. George might have been a project for Toto after Nico brutally left his enclosure so George as a project mattered him a lot. However, while everyone around him worships him for his power and his wife is, I mean, just his wife who can see him what he really is, a human being, George is the only person loves him unconditionally and I don’t think Toto would be willing to let that go that easily.

Let’s take our time to remember that George also despises Toto for not seeing George’s struggle regarding physical intimacy. So even though George is the person closest to love Toto unconditionally, he also despises him but also makes up excuses for him. Therefore George is not entierly delusional and with a correct nudge, he can be weaponized against Toto. Aka. George villain era.

Of course, there is a lot of things that must happen in coordination for that but we cannot forget that George doesn’t love Toto with pure, spotless feelings. He is cautious, like you would be around a tamed lion but since he is much less cautious than other people and also self destructive, Toto can perceive this as love. Just a thought.

George’s lack of self value usually manifests itself as fear, fear of disappointing people and maybe even slight, involuntary age regression. He is not equipped to navigate conflicts and since he doesn’t think that he has the right to exist with all his rights and wrongs, he always thinks he is an inconvenience.

I know you all want to shake him so badly, who knows, maybe someone will soon!

Thanks a lot for your feedback, I really appreciate it!

#answered asks #desecration: gr/tw fic #☂️

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luvlyhyunjin · 1 month

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Yeji had me hopping up and down in one place fuming. I was so mad when she said she knows him better because she’s his best friend almost made me forget that we both have known him for about the same amount of time😭.

I honestly didn’t expect her to snap so hard with Yeo but it almost gave me a mirrored reflection of how y/n was acting in the beginning of the situation towards Yeji…

Omg also now that she finally mentioned her mom has a private investigator and knowing that her dad doesn’t want her and Hyunjin to be together and with Yeo’s craziness. I wouldn’t be surprised if they’re all in kahoots with each other or at least her dad and Yeo. It will make sense how the gossip page has the capability to stay hidden in capture moments of only them two to post about, but the problem is why post it who would care sure everyone loves gossip, but what’s the purpose? You can’t tell me that Yeo threatened to tell Hyunjin about all of y/n’s secret agendas in the next day, Hyunjin’s family is attacked. He had told her father, and he set up the attack IDK IDK IM JUST TALKING. Can’t wait to hurt myself finding out 😭.

THANK YOU FOR THIS BEAUTIFUL PIECE OF WORK🌻🤍

omg that’s so true yeji is kinda acting like how y/n acted in the beginning it really shows that both of them are just insecure in different way or maybe yeosang just brings out the worse in everyone 🤓🥰

ohhh that’s a really interesting theory and it makes sense mhmm i wonder if that’s true🧐🧐 IM EXCITED FOR YOU GUYS TO READ EVERYTHING TOO AAA thank you so much for reading and writing baby🥰💕💕💕

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cassandralexxx · 9 months

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...

You know the drill when I have nothing and a cut its going to be my should be diary level rambles that I should probably go to therapy to examine instead of publishing to the internet (ie meant to be ignored)

I don’t know why it is so hard for me to confront the fact that I will never be married in the eyes of my God. like I keep trying to find excuses or work arounds or reasons that that wouldn’t be so. but I am a Lesbian. I can no more be attracted to a man than I can do any number of impossible things. Idk. I was thinking about this because many things but today I was thinking about how I probably should go to confession again soon. Because its been several months and the last priest had mentioned that I should go to confession monthly (still something that is sticking to me). But like in a Catholic confession if you don’t confess to all your sins then your confession is invalid because if you aren’t truly sorry and aren’t truly trying to repair your relationship with God than why are you even doing all of this yknow? So I was thinking about what I would need to include and idk if it would be right for me to mention *drum roll please* that one church group that i haven’t gone to this semester. because I lied about how busy I am to get out of attending. and lying is a sin. but ofc when i go to confession i don’t usually detail scenarios but it wouldn’t be a full confession if i didn’t confess to the gravity of that. but also i think i’m quitting the group in total. so like... even though i am sorry am i truly that sorry if i would do it again for fall? but also! i am genuinely going to be busy this fall. so much to do with extracurriculars, classes, and such. anyways this is so off topic but yeah idk i just thinking about that reminded me to the first time I had come out to someone,, summer after my sophomore year of highschool and it was at confession at a well known catholic summer camp. I say this every time the priest was very kind and whatever but he also told me that I should pray the rosary every day until I stopped being confused. and idk how to take that. idk how to internalize that and accept it. i’ve also mentioned that another priest absolved me of the daily rosary thing but like it is still so ... I often wonder how this one friend of mine would react if i ever talked about my struggle with faith and sexuality. like idk if I mentioned that last spring I signed a lil contract stating that i would not engage in relationships counter to the church in order to be in attendance of a book club for other queer catholics it feels so insane to say to think. and like if we ever think about doing so or do do so tell the leadership of the org. like ikd it distresses me I know her reaction would be akin to wtf yknow. like there is no chance it goes over well. because of that i don’t know why i am so fixated on that then. I have mentioned my lack of joy over my sexulity to my other friends before but not very frequently because it feels so embarassing. like i think last january at my friends bday me mentioning i was gay was brought up because one of my friends would always forget and be like “oooh“ when i was around a guy. but anyways in that moment i said something along the lines of yeah no unfortunately i’m not straight. another time fall 2021 ig was talking to my then roommate and I verbatim said “If I could choose I would be straight“, like that is such cringe loser behavior fr like i only remembered about it because girly pop posted about it on her sc story at the time saying that quote her roommate said what i said which like ugh bad. and like its just so bad memories that i said that out loud. and also just me last year telling a girly ik that i’m not really comfortable with my sexuality and would prefer if she didn’t like broadcast it like it is just idk. its so lame that i can’t get over this. because i never know which side i’m falling to when i say get over this. like some times when i want to get over it i want to turn to God and have Him take away this struggle and then others I’m like my God will love me anyways and even so I don’t want to deny myself forever. i’m a mess. I am constanlty flip flopping between wanting to be true to myself and wanting to push it way down. it was 2021 when i realized that being gay meant that i wouldn’t be married in the eyes of my God. I cried to myself as I lay in bed at night when I realized that. I had known I was gay for like 2 years and it was only then that it truly hit what that meant for my future. I was never the kind of girl who pictured my wedding but now i wonder what it would be like if it ever happened. it would’t be in a church and i’m not out to my dad right now so I wonder if he would walk me down the aisle. i think one good thing is that at least my father has already seen me in a “wedding dress“. (for context my senior year of high school i was a debutante for my city and debutantes wear white dresses and mine was an alterred wedding dress,, like it was gorgeous). anyways the concept of not being married is so sucky, like not being able to be i mean like in the eyes of my God i mean. like i comprehend the vast socioeconomic and legal protections and benefits normal marriage has but like i’m speaking religosity here. and it sucks because i think its right. like i would be kinda like idk if thats right if they did start having gay marriage in the church and isn’t that shitty. like damn. I turned to that one church group and church as strong as i did this past spring because i was hurting. i was hurting so much and i thought only in the prescence of God could I be helped. but now i’m sad for different reasons and idk. every one of these just has me thinking i don;t know i don’t know i don’t know. I used to think about the song “i can only imagine“ rather frequently. like the whole “will i stand in your presence or to my knees will i fall will i sing hallelujah will i be able to speak at all.“ and its like rgis much doubt makes me feel so doubly worried of being worthy to exist in His prescence. anyways this is all so dumb and just rambles from someone who doesn’t know what to do with her life. I make plans and form ideas that are contradictory in the hopes that the right one will rise to the top but that is never what really happens. circling back to marriage though i’m thinking about that one quote from the book from Jae like the i think second book after backwards to oregon and how Luke tells their daughter what it means to be married and what it is to be married even without the legality of it bc lilke the whole she’s a lesbian thing. idk that quote hit. i’ll have to look through the book for it later and post it on my blof lmao. anyways signing off this was a bit incoherent and yet id still say rather telling.

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appreciatingtokrev · 1 year

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hi! sorry for disappearing, i was feeling a bit down and then i 🫠 for a little while after that. yes, nfsw is a massive no but like you said there are other topics that shouldn't be discuss about. it actually is but a person will either get upset or find it rude, depending on their mindset but i suppose it's both like a double edged sword. those relationships def are treated as inferior but the friendships that turn into relationships are probably criticise most esp if the parties been friends for years but you can't force feelings to come out at an acceptable time if it ever happens 🤷‍♀️ that's true, a relationship need to be stable before progressing more.

it is a bit unfair esp if the newer users become massive fans, there are playthroughs on youtube but from what i've seen, it is a bit jumbled up and all over the place. i'm assuming you must have a lot of weapons then? oh i see, are they both mobile based? fans want a nintendo switch port for GI. it is a bit of a random topic lol. that's true and it would be super hard too, the spellings for my mum and her siblings overlaps a lot, they have double e in all their names. it's been a cool topic to talk about but it's finished now 🤣 that sound like an awkward situation to be in, i hope your teachers never thought that for like signed permissions slips for school's trips 😭 did you guys ever have problem with telling which one is your mail/posted package considering the initials thing. ah my dad and my names spelling are very similar (we have the same letters expect for one that isn't in mine) along with the initials so someone accidentally gave my option of voting to my dad because they skimmed through our names 😂 i did asked my dad if this was planned regarding our names and he said no.

also, i saw a short animated of koko accidentally confessing to inupi and it made me wonder what happened to inupi in the bonten timeline and his relationship with koko.

oh don’t worry, i’m glad that you’re back & feeling better again! <3

yup, agreed

yep. my ex & i tried to love each other romantically and force the feelings, aaand it did not work out lol. in hindsight i’m amazed we managed to go 8 months lmao. funny story too bc we’re both aroace now so it was double stupid. we also didn’t talk at all for 2 years (bc i had them blocked afhjfhg) but we started talking again last week and it’s going great now that we’ve both grown and realised that we’re way better off as friends so i’m not too upset abt our past mistakes anymore lol. anyway, lesson learnt, forcing relationships or love does NOT work out, no matter how desperately you want it to. also agreed, relationships definitely need to be stable to move on bc if they’re not it just keeps getting harder to somehow make them stable (again).

yeah, true. i mean yes.. to be fair i’ve been playing for a really long time and for most of that i’ve been playing it daily so,, hoyoverse (i think i called the company mihoyo in my last reply? they used to be called mihoyo but changed their name to hoyoverse idk a year or so ago but i keep forgetting adhjf) now releases all of their games for both mobile & pc, and i think gi, hi3rd, and hsr are for ps4 & ps5 too? honestly not sure, i play them all on pc. ah yes, the switch port... i used to be kinda excited for it but i’ve lost hope for getting one soon (if ever) bc we were promised one two and a half years ago and nothing’s been done ever since 💀

funny thing my dad is a teacher at my school so he knows some of my teachers a bit & even is friends with one lol so i never really had any problems with our signatures after explaining why they’re so similar. idk abt other places but on the post here there’s always your full name so we never had problems with that. tho i’ve had a bunch of other teachers from my school text me on teams thinking they were texting my father bc our usernames on there (bc school) are almost the same afhjgfjshd

ah lol, that seems annoying

oh i think i know which animation that was bc i think i’ve seen it too! i personally hc that they went no contact or at least barely have any contact even if they’re both not really happy with that (especially koko) but they think it’s for the best. i just think inupi wouldn’t want any associations with criminals and koko wouldn’t want inupi to have associations with criminals bc of him either, so... tho that’s pretty sad afhjggfh but imo the most realistic version of them in bonten

#tho i have a ton of diff hcs n dislike choosing between them #i just mostly see inupi with draken (romantic or platonic) in the bonten timeline & i think he’d like to settle down & distance himself+#from crime and stuff. he just wants a peaceful life yk #and koko thinks that inupi deserves a happy peaceful life and if inupi can’t have that if he’s still part of his life... he’s fine with+#not being part of his life anymore. bc it’s for the best. and possibly inupi’s happiness #tho i also think they will always miss each other when apart even if the hurt grows to be less it’s always there somewhere #☆—`ask #anon: z

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selfcarecap · 3 years

Text

Big Dick Energy [p.p]

Summary: Peter overhears you say something, making him worry about the size of his dick.

This was just a super random idea i had and i thought it was just cr*ck my mind would forget in 20 minutes, but suddenly i turned it into a whole one shot sksjsh don’t judge me (if this is your first fic of mine that you’re reading... pls go read another one first to decide if you like my writing lmaoo😭)

Warnings: this was not supposed to be anything serious lmao, this has smut but ... idk the talk leading up to the smut is the weird thing here ahah, um squirting, mention of blood, sorry if there’s weird spacing, i’m posting this on my phone. Overuse of the word dick. Peter referring to his dick as ‘he’?

word count: 3.8k

-this is a repost of an old fic- idek if i like it but it had over 1k notes so i figured some people don’t want it deleted?

gif not mine <3

Peter isn‘t eavesdropping. He just feels like he‘s been neglecting his enhanced hearing lately, so he wants to appreciate it more by putting it to good use— by listening to your voice. He loves your voice.

He just so happens to listen to you while you‘re having a rather private conversation with your friend Betty.

“So she told me they had sex for the first time last night and she said it was really as big as she‘s seen in porn, and there was blood everywhere,“ Betty says, a dramatic tone in her voice.

Even though your back is turned to him he can picture you scrunching up your nose, “Oh god. People don’t say have your first time with someone who has a small dick for no reason.”

Peter’s eyes immediately drift down to his lap.

Wait what? He thought girls preferred big dicks and now they prefer small dicks? He thought his dick size was never something he had to worry about, as his dick always seemed quite decent to him. If anything he did worry that he’s not quite big enough, and now he might be too big?

That night he sits down on his bed with a ruler and his phone.

Turns out he’s at least average, even a little above - depending on the website. He frowns when he measures his hard dick for the third time. It’s not going to get smaller the more he measures, so he pulls his pants pack up and goes to bed with a frown. He doesn’t even want to jerk off anymore.

All he can think of is you, and not in the way you would expect while he’s hard. He can’t touch himself while he’s worried about you not liking his dick. He wants you to like his dick.

Oh. And then there’s the fact that you’re not even together, so you might never see his dick. But Peter is nothing if not hopeful.

Then Peter’s mind starts racing. What if you were talking from experience? What if you have had sex already? You two are best friends, but you’re still a guy and a girl, and talking about sex is already awkward enough when Peter and Ned talk about it, so he never thought about talking about sex with you. Not that he has much to talk about anyway.

He wouldn’t care if you’ve had sex already, he wouldn’t judge you. But his blood boils when you just hug another guy, so thinking about you having sex with another guy, and not telling him on top of that, makes him want to punch something.

Peter barely sleeps that night.

He just can’t stop thinking about it.

He must have misunderstood you. He was so sure that big dicks are considered good, and small dicks are bad. Why would you suddenly prefer a small dick? He tries to replay your conversation he overheard earlier in his head, but all he can remember is you talking about having sex with someone with a small dick.

Maybe you were being sarcastic, and he didn’t get it because he couldn’t see your expression.

Peter was never one to worry about his dick. Now he hears you say one sentence and he thinks about it for days. He’ll have to ask you about it or he’ll go crazy.

You’re studying together a few days later, separately doing your college assignments. Peter finished his studying a few minutes ago, and now he’s just waiting for you to be done, so he can ask you… about dicks. He tries not to think about it too much, otherwise he’ll chicken out.

He’s distracting himself with some Subway Surfers to pass the time, and he doesn’t notice how you clear up all your papers. All he knows is you’re doing a whole body stretch right next to him, your limbs spreading out over the bed- and now him.

He’s about to break his record on the game when your arm brushes against his thigh, dangerously close to his lap.

Peter drops his phone, jumping as you touch him.

“You okay?” You ask, turning around to face him.

“Y-yeah, I didn’t notice you were done already.”

“Yup. All done for the weekend. So, what do you wanna do?” You’re lying on your belly now, head resting on your folded arms.

Peter tries to find the words he wants to say to you. He’s about to ask if you were being serious when you said it, but then he remembers he was eavesdropp—... appreciating his enhanced hearing, and you don’t know he was listening at the time.

“Um, I heard, actually I read something the other day and I wanted to ask you about it.”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“But it’s a weird topic, and it’s okay if you don’t want to talk about it or something.”

“Why, what is it?” you ask, sitting up. You lean against the headboard next to him.

“Uhh well. I read that girls- that girls. Uh, when they have... sex, they try to have sex with a guy who has a small dick. And I thought, well, I thought that girls like big dicks. So, uhm, I was just wondering what you, as a girl, think about that.”

You stifle a laugh. You thought Peter was about to ask something serious.

“Actually, Betty and I were talking about the other day. One of her friends wanted to have sex, and she wanted to quickly have her first time to get it over with. And she apparently chose a guy with the biggest dick ever, and she was so surprised that it hurt.”

“Wait what?” Peter asks.

“So, if you want to have sex, then it makes sense to go for a guy with a small dick because it hurts less,” you explain with a shrug.

“Oh. Ok. Yeah, that makes sense. Wait so it’s just because of the pain during the first times?”

“Yeah.”

“But what if your boyfriend has a big dick. I mean would you have your first time with a guy who has a small dick? Um, assuming you haven’t had sex yet,” he mumbles the last part. Even though he knows you’ve never even kissed anyone.

“Of course I would. No girl goes around asking boys how big their dicks are to determine who she should have her first time with. It’s more of a joke, or if anything just for people who want to get it over with, their first time, I mean,” you see Peter slowly become less tense.

“So yeah, of course I’d have my first time with a guy with a big dick as long as I love him. But honestly I kind of have hope that it's not going to hurt too much anyway. If I liked the guy I’m with then I should be.. you know,” you motion with your hand, hoping he knows what you’re trying to say.

“Um. I don’t know where you’re going with this,” he shoots you an apologetic smile.

“I just mean, I hope I’ll be wet enough anyway, so that it just … like… slides in.”

“Oh- yeah of course, mhm,” Peter swallows and looks away.

“Why?” you ask, as the purpose of his questioning slowly sinks in, “Are you afraid that your dick is too big?” You purposely lie down on his thighs that are stretched across the bed.

He doesn’t look at you.

You sit up again, “Wait really? Can I see?” It just slips out, you don’t know why you said it. But also, you really do want to see.

“What, no!” He pulls his legs against his chest, “It’s not big, but it’s not small either. I was just wondering because of what you said- what I read, I mean.”

“So it’s like average?”

“I don’t know how many inches exactly,” you raise your eyebrows, and his cheeks turn a deep red, “but I guess a bit more than average.”

“The thing is, Peter, I don’t know much about... dicks or how big average is,” He doesn’t say anything, so you try again, “You’re just gonna tell me about your dick and then not let me see it? That’s kinda mean. I’m your best friend, don’t you trust me?”

You don’t know why you’re so persistent about this. If any other guy told you this much about his dick you would have kicked him by now.

“That’s not- that’s not how it works.”

You can tell Peter doesn’t want to show you his dick. But you also know him, and he’s not truly uncomfortable. He’s just a little embarrassed. You’ll stop as soon as you sense that he’s genuinely upset.

You’re about to make a joke, but he says something first, “It- he’s not fully hard right now, so you wouldn’t see him in the um required state for sex-”

“Not fully hard? But a bit hard? And.. he?”

“I can’t control it, okay? And I can’t call him it. He has quite a personality, you know?” Peter says, a slight smile on his lips before he pushes a pillow against his face, letting it fall into his lap afterwards.

“But wouldn’t... he be in the ideal state like that? It.. or he won’t be too big so that it would seem intimidating, you know?

You really want to see Peter’s dick. You don’t know why, but you do. You’re really trying to convince your best friend to show you his dick.

“Anyway, it wouldn’t be fair. So I show you my dick but what do I get in return?”

Without so much as a second thought, you pull up your shirt, exposing your chest. You’re not wearing a bra, and your nipples harden against the cool air. Peter’s eyes go wide, and he pouts when you drop the hem of your shirt again.

“Now you,” you smile, voice a bit quiet.

“Woah- wow. I was not expecting that. You weren’t wearing a bra this whole time?”

“Nope.” You pull your legs against your chest, feeling your nipples poke against your shirt uncomfortably.

“O-okay,” Peter says.

He throws the pillow that was on his lap off the bed, readjusting his sitting position. You see his fingers tremble as he undoes his belt.

“Hey, Pete, wait. You don’t have to do this if you’re not comfortable. We can just forget it.“

He gives you a shy smile, “No, it’s only fair. A deal’s a deal.”

You lick your lips in anticipation, and it feels like he unzips his jeans in slow motion.

A few seconds pass while he pulls down his jeans and boxers in one go, and then he’s holding his hard cock in his hand. It’s glistening at the tip.

Your breath hitches but you try not to seem too bothered. “You’re right, it’s definitely not small. But... I think I could take that,” you say, surprising yourself.

“Y-yeah?”

“Mhm,” you nod, getting under the blanket and pulling off your sweatpants.

“W-what, right now?”

“Yeah. C’mere.”

Peter joins you under the blanket, getting between your legs.

“Can I kiss you?” You ask, and he nods eagerly.

You move to place your hands on his cheeks but his lips are already on yours. Your heart beats wildly as his lips move against your own.

He’s only semi stable on top of you, holding himself up awkwardly, with his cock in his hand, holding it back so it doesn’t touch you.

You notice his hand and look up at him, “It’s okay.”

He reluctantly lets go of his cock and you reach down, wrapping your hand around him.

You start jerking him off, unsure if he’s enjoying it, “Does that feel okay?”

He takes your hand, bringing it up to his mouth. He licks up your palm shyly and guides it back down to his cock.

This time he lets out a breathy moan as you go up and down his cock. He looks so beautiful with his eyebrows scrunched together, biting his lip.

“Wait, I’m not gonna last if you keep doing that.”

“Okay,” you smile nervously, dropping your hand. You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling your panties to the side so you can find out what it feels like to have him inside of you.

Peter looks down and smiles, leaning down to kiss you again.

His cock brushes against your inner thigh for a second, and a weird feeling shoots through your whole body. You immediately let go of your panties, letting them slide back in place, and you roll to the side, away from Peter.

“Wait, I’m not ready. Sorry.”

He backs off as soon as you say that, “No don’t apologise. I- I don’t really know if I was ready either.”

You stare at each other for a few seconds, Peter clutching the blanket while he pulls his boxers back up.

“Sorry,” you repeat, feeling bad for leading him on.

“Don’t say that, there’s really no need,” he smiles.

You lick your lips as you see the bulge straining against his underwear, scooting closer to him, “I could still... help you with that.”

“You don’t have to.”

“I kinda liked watching you when I was touching you just now.”

A blush coats his cheeks, and he can’t help but smile, “If you’re sure you want to, then yes please.”

You nod, pulling his cock from his boxers, spitting in your hand as you start again.

Peter leans back on his hands, throwing his head back as your thumb rubs over the tip.

Once you get a good rhythm, you look into his eyes, and he can’t seem to look away, even though he’s blushing up to the tips of his ears.

“Fuck I-” He squeezes his eyes shut as thick ropes of cum shoot out of his cock, painting his grey shirt. You barely manage to hold in your own moans as Peter tips his head back, groaning as he cums more.

You slow your movements when Peter opens his eyes again, looking refreshed. Letting go of his softening cock, you wipe your hand on his shirt. He pulls his boxers back in place, looking down at his shirt with a red glow on his face.

“Um, I should probably...” he mumbles, pulling the shirt over his head and throwing it to the floor.

You give him some space, scooting to the other side of the bed with your ankles crossed.

“What about you?” He asks, licking his lips.

“What about me?” I-I’m fine,” you say, hoping he doesn’t notice how horny you still are.

“I can kinda see how wet you are,” he smiles.

You close your legs quickly, feeling your cheeks heat up.

“I don’t have to but uh. I can try to make you feel good.”

You think for a second, looking down at his legs.

“You know, I always liked your thighs.”

“My thighs?”

“Mhm,” you crawl over to him, straddling his leg. Your pussy is pulsing already, and you hope he can’t feel it, “Is this okay?”

He still looks a little confused, but he nods, pulling you closer, your pussy rubbing up against his thigh in the process, and you hope he doesn’t hear the small whimper that slips out.

With the way he smiles at you, you can’t tell if he heard or if he’s just smiling because you’re straddling him and you’re half naked.

You wrap your arms around his neck, and you start making out again. It’s more steady this time and after a while you feel comfortable enough to start grinding against his leg.

His hands wander down to your ass, supporting the movement of your hips.

He pulls away shortly, “Fuck, you’re hot,” he whispers, and crashes his lips against yours again.

You’re so wet that it doesn’t matter how you move, as long as there’s some kind of friction. But when Peter starts flexing his thigh you wonder how you ever got off without that feeling.

You try to keep on kissing him, only so his eyes remain shut.

You’re not too shy to shamelessly grind against his thigh but you can’t have him watching you so closely while you do it.

When you can no longer concentrate on making out with him, you bury your face in his neck. For the first time you notice that you can hear how wet you are.

But Peter flexes his thigh again, and before you can become embarrassed by how horny you are, the pleasure takes over.

You bite into his shoulder to muffle your moans as you keep grinding against him, your pussy pulsing against his muscles.

Peter kisses the side of your face once you stop moving. You pull back, not daring to look at him, and you bashfully get off of him. You’re surprised that his thigh isn’t coated in your arousal.

You finally look up at Peter who has nothing but adoration in his eyes. He tries to get words out but he’s speechless, making you giggle.

“God, I’ve never been this wet. Do you think you could...” you stop before the words leave your mouth.

“What?”

“Nevermind.”

“No, tell me,” he insists, a hand on your leg.

“So... I’ve never fingered myself, mainly because I can’t find the right angle, but I was thinking since I’m really wet and you have a different perspective and better angle maybe you could…”

“Finger you?”

“Only if you want to,” you brush a hand over your hair.

“Yeah- yes of course.” He eagerly gets between your thighs, a bright smile on his face.

As you slip out of your panties you’re nearly embarrassed to see what a mess you made in them.

He stares at your dripping pussy for a bit, and you see a new bulge forming under his boxers.

“Peter?” You nudge him.

“Yeah- sorry, so um, is it here?”

He spreads your legs, placing his index finger right at your entrance.

“Yeah, right there.”

He starts sliding his finger in, slow at first. But with all your arousal he slides all the way in right away, shooting you a worried look to see if it hurts.

“Can you do another finger?”

“Mhm. Tell me if it hurts.” He changes the position of his hand, sliding in another finger.

You arch your back, pushing against him, “Can you um. Can you-” you’ve forgotten nearly every word from how good he feels.

He guesses what you want, and he guesses correctly, his fingers now thrusting into you at a slow pace.

“Yeah- just faster,” you say.

You feel his thumb on your pussy, not doing anything, and it distracts you from the delicious feeling of his fingers inside of you.

“Can you do something else with your thumb,” you complain, and Peter’s mouth falls open as if he’s been caught red handed.

“I-I‘ve seen that in porn so I thought it might feel good but uh.”

“If you’re looking for my clit, that’s here,” you guide him. You’re so wet and swollen, it feels like he could just rest his thumb on your clit for a few minutes and you’d cum.

He gets into it again, his tongue pressing against his lip in concentration as he fingers you.

Peter is good at following your instructions, getting even quicker and more rough every time you ask him to.

His thumb brushes against your clit with every thrust and it adds to that special feeling that brings you closer to your release with every second.

You’re scrunching your shirt between your fingers harder with every time Peter moves his fingers in and out of your wet pussy. You whine when he hits a particularly deep spot inside of you, and he presses his fingertips even deeper inside of you.

Peter pushes his fingers up and into you and suddenly you feel the urge to—

With a high pitched gasp you squirt all over Peter’s chest, as the most intense orgasm you’ve ever had washes through you.

Your mouth hangs open, so does Peter’s. While his eyes tell you this is the hottest thing he’s ever seen you can’t stop the embarrassment you feel just a second after your orgasm is over.

“Wow-” he starts.

“I’m so sorry,” you say at the same time.

“W-what, no? What? I deliberately did that. That was so sexy, no need to say sorry at all.”

“How do you know how to make a girl squirt?”

He blushes, his fingers still inside of you, “I, when I googled the thing about um dick sizes I came across the whole C spot thing.”

“It’s G.”

“What?”

“Nothing. You’re cute,” you say. You press your lips against his, but his fingers push into you further again and you jump.

“Sorry,” Peter mumbles, pulling his fingers out of you. He casually licks his fingers that are coated in your arousal, humming to himself at the taste.

You don’t comment on it, fearing you’ll become horny again if you think about it too much.

He lets you go to the bathroom first, and when you come back you see his stained shirt on the floor.

“Should I help you wash that? It’d be a bit awkward if May found that in the washing.”

“Oh yeah, thanks. Uh I’ll just do it.”

He comes back a few minutes later in a fresh shirt and boxers, the bulge now gone. After throwing his wet t-shirt over the radiator he joins you on the bed.

You both lie there in silence, tired but also tense as you wonder what this means.

“You know for some reason I always imagine having my first time with you. Even though, up until today at least, I didn’t think of you as more than a friend,” you admit, quickly adding, “I mean if today even meant something…”

“I hope it did. It meant something to me,” he says.

“Good.” You take his hand, and you smile at each other.

“I always imagine having sex for the first time with you too. That’s why I was so worried in the first place when I heard that girls are so concerned about the pain and would prefer someone with a small dick for their first time... So you don’t think my dick is too big?”

You giggle, “Your dick is perfect, Peter. And I’m sure we’ll make it fit once we’re both ready.”

“So you want us to be together?” He asks, hopeful.

You simply kiss him, your hands cupping his cheeks. You feel him smile into the kiss.

“You just made me squirt, Pete. You’re not going anywhere,” you smile.

“Good, because I wasn’t planning on leaving,” he says before he kisses you silly.

#peter parker x reader #peter parker smut #peter parker x you #spiderman x reader #peter parker #fem!reader #selfcarecap #let me quickly post this at an unconvenient time 💀

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mypoisonedvine · 3 years

Text

𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙫𝙮 𝙢𝙚𝙩𝙖𝙡 𝙡𝙤𝙫𝙚𝙧 (𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐𝘐) || sub!bucky barnes x dominatrix!reader

(𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵 𝘐)

𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙨𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮 || your newest client asks you to give him a real challenge, and you’re happy to oblige.

𝙬𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝙘𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩 || 6.3k

𝙬𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨 || smut but no actual sex (lots of handjob stuff though and some brief oral m receiving), overstimulation, multiple orgasms, more cnc (because of the overstimulation), bondage, edging, impact play (riding crop), brief cock torture (she just hits him with the crop a couple times), implied “kink as trauma response” (this is gonna be a theme throughout the whole fic), forced to break a rule/doomed to fail/impossible challenge (idk how to warn for this but yeah), forced voyeurism?, thigh riding (reader rides bucky’s thigh), some degradation/dumbification, brief/implied dacryphilia, a bit of angst/feelings

new parts posted on thursdays! join the taglist here

“Can’t,” he sighed, “can’t come again.”

He looked so painfully adorable when he begged like that, his brow glistening with sweat as he jerked under your touch. “Aw, poor baby,” you pouted, twisting your hand when it stroked over the head of his cock, “yes you can. I know you can. Just gimme one more.”

“F-fuck,” he whimpered, “Mistress, please— just stop, please, I can’t… can’t take any more…”

“I know you can, sweetheart— I know you can be my good boy and keep coming for me. Tell me your color.”

“Yellow,” he whispered.

“Think you’re almost done?” you pressed, smiling when he nodded breathlessly. “Yeah, there’s my good boy— gonna come again for your Mistress?”

“Yes,” he breathed, baring his teeth as his hips bucked wildly to try to avoid further sensation, “y-yes, one more, just one more, I’m gonna— fuck, gonna come, just don’t stop… fuck, it hurts.”

“I know, but you’re being so good for me,” you purred. “You like it when I milk your pretty cock, don’t you? Even though it hurts?”

He winced but nodded. “C-coming, Mistress, fuck, I’m coming…!”

Since it was his fifth of the evening, he could only give you one thick drop of come that gathered at his slit before running down over your hand which finally slowed to a stop.

You both sighed with relief as you pulled your hand away and leaned back, admiring how beautiful he looked as he caught his breath, covered in come and sweat.

"Good job," you praised with a chuckle, "I hope I didn't go too hard on you."

"N-no, that was… that was really good," he sighed, slumping back onto the bed. "Can I use your shower before I go?"

"Yeah, totally," you nodded.

After a long pause, you gave him a confused look.

"I thought you were gonna shower?" you reminded him.

"Oh… I guess I have to get up for that," he sighed, making you laugh.

"Rest a bit longer. You've had a… challenging afternoon."

He nodded a little and you got up from the bed to go wash your hands and freshen up a little, smiling at your own appearance in the mirror— sometimes you forgot how you looked when you did this, but there was an undeniable aura of power around you… especially after a session like that.

This was only your third week with James, and already the dynamic felt so natural between you— and yet, so fresh compared to your other clients. Normally it took longer for a newbie to get comfortable with you, yet most of them had had multiple doms before and here was James, totally inexperienced and taking it all like a champ. There was an air of innocence about him, you figured, in contrast to this undeniable strength and intensity that you caught glimpses of from time to time.

Sometimes, it felt like he was chasing an innocence he lost a long time ago. Whatever it was that drew him to this, you were happy to help him along the way.

It was probably a little dangerous to enjoy sessions with a client so much; even though you often pretended that everything was about your pleasure and not theirs, obviously since they were the paying customer it was the complete opposite in reality. But there was an equity to the dynamic with you and Bucky, he served you with a real dedication rather than for his own gain. And you, meanwhile, had rediscovered the fun in this career that had originally drawn you to it in the first place. It was less like a science now, more like an art— you let yourself go with your instincts and do whatever felt right in the moment, and both of you benefitted for it.

“Come on, get up and clean yourself off,” you encouraged— gently, of course— as you left the bathroom and returned to find James laying sprawled out on the bed.

“I know you said falling asleep here was a one-time courtesy,” he remembered with a smile, “but I could use it now a lot more than I needed it then.”

Honestly, you didn’t see him smile that often. It was pleasant; you hoped to see it again. He did get up, though, and take the washcloth you handed him to wipe off the come that had gotten all over him. “What are you thinking for next week?” you asked as you leaned against the wall. “Any special requests?”

“We can discuss all that over the phone,” he decided. You still didn’t understand fully why he didn’t like to discuss future scenes in person; it was like he wanted the in-person interactions to be as ‘in character’ (if you will) as possible.

“Alright, just keep me updated,” you requested with a shrug.

You got changed while he took his shower, and when he emerged to the living room he seemed surprised to see you sitting on your own couch. After a moment, you realized it was the fact that you were in normal clothes that threw him off. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen you in jeans before… or pants of any kind.”

You looked down at your outfit with a smile, glad it was at least still professional and not sweats and a t-shirt or something. “Yeah, I guess you haven’t. First time for everything, right?”

“Yeah, had a lot of first times with you,” he chuckled. “Most significantly less mundane than this.”

A brief silence filled the room but it wasn’t exactly awkward, at least not for you.

“Well, I’ll see you next week,” he decided as he grabbed his jacket from your chair and slipped it on. You’d been spending most of this session trying to forget how good he looked in the leather motorcycle cut, so that was out the window now as you tried to keep from visibly biting your lip while he walked towards the door.

Damn, he was fine. But there were more pressing matters at hand. Like preparing yourself and your apartment for your next appointment. This guy wanted to get slapped around until he cried… shouldn't be too difficult, but your arms would probably be sore tomorrow.

Opposite of last week, I really want you to edge me tonight, as long as possible.

Don't go easy on me, make me hold it in. I need a challenge this week.

-J

It was odd how emails from James made your week.

He seemed to prefer to communicate his desire with you this way; maybe it was easier for him, and you couldn’t really blame him for that. The nice part was that you didn’t have to temper your reactions, if you had any, since you were always alone when you got his messages. You might be old hat at it now, but you could remember a time that you had to hide a grimace when a client told you to your face what he wanted. Not that you would shame them for it or anything (unless, you know, they paid you to), but you didn’t enjoy everything you did with these men.

Did you enjoy everything you did with James? Yes, but you were pretending not to— for your own sake.

You dressed a bit differently for today’s session, more conservatively… not that it was especially conservative by any other person’s standards. But it left your legs and chest covered, somewhat in the spirit of ‘mean corporate businesswoman’ aesthetically. For some reason you felt like using a riding crop required wearing pants.

James certainly didn’t seem to mind, with the way he nervously cleared his throat after you opened the door.

“Good to see you again,” you greeted formally, “please, come in.”

He stepped past you, still looking at you and not at what was in front of him, meaning he ended up slamming himself gut-first into your kitchen island.

“Oh! Are you alright?” you smiled when you noticed.

“Yeah, I’m good,” he nodded, rubbing his stomach for a second but recovering quickly. “I told you I can take a lot of pain,” he joked.

“Well, we’re going to put that to the test today,” you promised cryptically. “You must’ve seen the crop on the table.”

He nodded again. “Yeah....”

“Are you looking forward to it?”

“Yes,” he answered, a bit too quickly.

“Then let’s get you tied up, James.”

Straddling his lap, you realized the rope was a bit too tight when you saw it digging into his skin; maybe he wouldn’t mind that, but you did, so you pushed the rope back through itself to loosen it slightly.

“How long did it take you to learn all these knots?” he asked casually, watching your fingers nimbly work the ropes around his wrists.

“Not too long,” you shrugged, “I’ve only been doing this a few years… but I knew them before that.”

“Boating school? Boy Scouts?” he suggested jokingly.

“Just a hobby,” you decided, dodging the covert question about your past. “Were you a Boy Scout?”

“Do I look like a Boy Scout?” he countered with a scoff.

“Not anymore,” you shrugged, “but I bet you did once. You’re sorta innocent, you know.”

He swallowed dryly, and you raised an eyebrow as you glanced from the knot you were tightening to his face, which looked a bit flustered. “R-really?”

“Yeah,” you confirmed, leaning back on your heels to look at him straight-on. “Are you surprised to hear that?”

He nodded quickly, and you laughed.

“Aw, you thought you were so kinky, huh? So dirty,” you purred, running your hand up his leg until he tugged slightly on the newly-tied ropes— a subtle way to get him to test them for you. “But you’re really not. You’re just my sweet, innocent boy.”

He whined— really, properly whined— and you dug your nails into his skin until he hissed instead.

“I don’t think you believe me,” you noticed, leaning back to reach for the crop behind you. “You think you’re so filthy and perverted, right? Are you a pervert, James?”

“Yes,” he breathed, shivering as you let the crop slide gently over his skin— his abs, his hips, his legs which were already quivering so adorably. “Yes, Mistress.”

“And how’s that?”

“I think about… getting hurt,” he admitted weakly, “when I touch myself. And I touch myself all the fucking time.”

“Yeah? How many times a day do you stroke that pretty cock, James?”

“Twice every morning,” he blurted out, “after that it depends.”

You didn’t let yourself show your surprise at that number. “Depends on what?”

When he hesitated, you hit him sharply on the thigh and he winced. “Depends on what I… what I end up thinking about. Sometimes… sometimes something reminds me, and I have to get off.”

Something told you not to press on what it was that he needed to be reminded of, and why it made him want to jerk off so bad. Something told you he wasn’t ready to tell that story yet. “Did you touch yourself today already?” you asked instead.

“No, no ma’am,” he shook his head, voice wavering as you brushed the crop over his chest, “it’s… it’s different with you.”

“Yeah, I bet it is,” you smirked, hitting him on the stomach quickly. “I bet you’re finally satisfied, right? Nothing’s ever worked for you before.”

“Yes,” he moaned, crying out slightly when you hit him on the arm (flesh— you were too afraid what sound the metal one would make) much harder than before. “The nights I see you, I… I can sleep.”

“You sleep better?”

“No, I just… sleep.”

You tried not to react to that, moving to a new question instead. “Do you want me to hit you again? Or do you want me to stroke your cock for you?”

An obvious choice to some, surely, but he seemed to really struggle with it.

“Which one do you think you deserve?” you asked instead.

“Hit me more,” he decided.

Instantly, you struck him once on the face and again on the shoulder, then moved down to his legs for three in a row in spite of the way his body jerked away instinctively.

“Fuck,” he sobbed, “don’t stop— I need more…”

You focused on his legs, on the inside of his thigh where he seemed the most sensitive. His twisted joy turned to true fear, though, when you brushed the end of the crop over his balls. “Do you want me to hit you here?” you challenged.

“I… I don’t know,” he stammered.

“Let’s make a deal, James,” you offered, “wherever I hit you, I’m gonna kiss it to make it better.”

“Then hit me wherever you want,” he nodded, almost smiling at you. He cried through his teeth when you whipped his shaft with the crop— not especially hard, in fact quite delicately, though the second was harder. And the third, though not much more aggressive, was right on the sensitive tip; his eyes shot open and his hips jerked away.

“So good, such a good boy,” you whispered proudly, putting the crop aside to lean in and kiss his cheek where you’d hit him before, his shoulder, his arm.

You worked your way down carefully as he breathed heavily beneath you, whimpering slightly when you kissed his thighs and notably ignored his flexing, leaking cock. “Please,” he whimpered.

“Shh, be patient,” you soothed, “be my good boy.”

“Your good boy,” he repeated, trying to restrain himself but already bucking up into the air again, “fuck, wanna be your good boy, Mistress.”

“Are you already close, pet, just from getting hurt?” you asked in a faux pout. “You’re not gonna come if I give your pretty cock some kisses, right?”

“I— I won’t come,” he promised. “Not until I get permission.”

“Baby, it’s gonna be a long fuckin’ time before you get permission,” you promised with a toothy grin. “Look down at me, honey, I want you to see this.”

He hesitated for a second but obeyed, looking down at you with an expression that was full of awe as you gripped his cock and gave gentle, teasing kisses up his shaft. It bobbed in your hands with each one, and he let out the most beautiful sigh when you kissed the tip carefully.

A wide lick made him jerk beneath you. “F-Fuck,” he stammered.

“You said you wouldn’t come,” you reminded him. “Can I keep going? Are you gonna be a good boy?”

“Don’t stop, please,” he breathed, “I’ll be good.”

Taking the head between your lips, you suckled gently as he shivered and moaned. You weren’t sure you’d ever been with anybody— on or off the clock— who was so sensitive. And you loved it, honestly; who could resist those precious noises he made?

As much as part of you wanted to go nuts and really push him to the edge, you tried to be gentle and careful so as not to make it impossible for him to hold back. But even then, when you gently grasped his balls in one of your hands and squeezed them, he apparently couldn’t take anymore.

"S-stop," he hissed, and you pulled back, sitting up.

"You were close?" you asked, and he nodded a little. "Oh, what a good boy."

He whimpered briefly. "Yes, your good boy, Mistress…"

Your fingers trailed delicately up the underside of his cock, making him shiver violently. "I know you want to come, but you want to be good even more. You're such a sweet little pet."

It seemed like the praises did more to keep him on the edge than the touches, so you kept both going; wrapping your fingers around the ridge of his head, you gave the most gentle and subtle strokes, and leaned in to whisper against his ear.

“Is this why you wanted me to edge you today, James? So you could show me how good you can be?”

“I-I don’t know,” he blurted out, rocking his hips as best he could while restrained, “I just wanted to… I just wanted you to make me wait.”

“Well, you don’t need to worry about that,” you laughed slightly, “I can make you wait all day. Is that what you want?”

“No, that’s— not that long, I can’t wait that long,” he shuddered.

“Mm, that sounds like your problem, not mine,” you smirked. “Not sure why I asked what you want, honestly… cause I don’t fucking care.”

His choked-out whine was too perfect to ignore.

“Oh, what a pathetic little moan that was, poor baby,” you cooed mockingly, “are you regretting it now? You’re probably wondering what you got yourself into, ‘cause you’re worried Mistress is never gonna let you come.”

“No, I don’t regret it,” he denied weakly, “whatever you want— do whatever you want to me, just… give me what I deserve, please.”

You stopped touching him completely and he straight-up sobbed. “You don’t deserve anything from me, James. You don’t deserve me at all.”

He told you before that he liked when you rapidly cycled between soft and mean. Kept him on his toes, apparently. Honestly, you felt a little guilty talking to him that way sometimes, but his cock leaking enough pre-cum to soak the bedsheets beneath him was a sign you were doing something right. “I know!” he cried. “I know, fuck, I’m sorry, but I need you. I fucking need you, Mistress, please— you know I’ll do anything.”

“I’m feeling generous today,” you shrugged, “so I won’t ask you for much. Just beg me a little more.”

“Please, pleasepleaseplease,” he rushed, “touch me. Anywhere, whatever you want, I just need to feel you. I know I… fuck, I know I don’t deserve it, but let me try to— to earn it. Please.”

You knew if he had it his way, he wouldn’t do much talking at all. But you couldn’t just let him have it his way, now could you? It was better to make him just the right amount of nervous, just the slightest hair uncomfortable, by making him talk to you. And, of course, you liked the way his deep and rough voice got all whiny and needy like this.

One finger under his chin guided him to look up at you, those pretty blue eyes watery and sparkling and wide with misplaced innocence.

“Tell me who you belong to, James,” you instructed darkly.

“You, Mistress,” he whispered, “I’m yours, I— oh fuck…”

Unshockingly, he was reduced to only moans again when you started stroking his cock, the slick precum making every movement smoother. “All mine, huh? My little toy?” you confirmed, but he could only nod and swallow thickly.

You sped up quickly, getting faster and faster until you were really, properly jerking him off and he was biting hard on his lip. Just when he seemed to really fall into it, get almost comfortable, you had to stop.

"Oh, fuck—" he gasped, bucking his hips up to try to chase your hand when you pulled away, but it was no use with him tied up. You watched his cock bob in the air and smiled.

“Did you think it was going to be that easy?” you smirked.

Shaking his head, you tilted yours to look at him, reaching up to trace your fingers over his chest.

“Don’t lie, baby, you thought I was gonna let you come, didn’t you? You’re so sweet, James, and so, so stupid.”

He gasped, and for a second you thought you might’ve gone too far, but it shifted to a moan quickly and you realized he was having the time of his life.

“Just my dumb, brainless little toy,” you continued with a snarl, watching him tug at the ropes as his eyes fluttered shut. “It’s okay, James, it’s okay… you don’t need to think, I don’t want your mind. It’s useless. I want this pretty cock, that’s all I want from you.”

“It’s all yours, Mistress,” he promised, cheeks burning bright red and eyes forced shut. “All of it, I swear.”

“I know,” you cooed, holding his face gently to soothe him a bit. But then your other hand wrapped around his cock and he was anything but soothed. “Shh, shh, don’t make any sounds, you’re just a toy and toys need to stay quiet.”

You missed his noises, actually, but he looked so cute biting his lip and struggling to suppress them. His cock was so swollen in your hand that you honestly wondered if it was somehow getting bigger. Was that even possible? Your mouth was watering regardless.

“I’m gonna give you a little break,” you promised gently, “but I’ll be honest, pretty boy… I don’t think you’re gonna like it one bit.”

The look he gave you beautifully balanced fear with anticipation, and you stopped stroking him to reach over towards the bedside drawer and pull out a vibrator.

“Your Mistress is feeling a little.... self-indulgent today,” you winked. “And since I, unlike you, don’t need to hold myself back from coming, I think I might as well get myself off if I want to.”

His throat bobbed as he swallowed dryly, watching you closely as you stood up off the bed and started to carefully undress yourself. It was a lot more fun to get naked when you were wearing something that didn’t actually show much skin— the button-up seemed to really get him going, his tongue mindlessly darting out to lick his lips as you opened one button at a time.

Once it was off your shoulders and on the floor, and he could see the almost-transparent bra you had on, you moved to opening your trousers as well. Just to be mean, you faced the other way as you pushed them down over your ass; you heard his breath catch and you smirked to yourself, spinning to face him again in just the matching, dark red bra and panty set.

“What do you think, do you like this better than the black ones?” you asked coyly.

“I like you naked better than both,” he answered, and you grinned.

“I’m gonna let that backtalk slide just once because it’s not worth my time to go over there and slap you for it,” you decided. “But don’t test me, James.”

“Yes, Mistress,” he answered dutifully, sounding a bit out of breath as he watched you climb back onto the bed, positioning yourself carefully.

You faced him straight-on and laid your legs over his, meaning your lace-covered pussy was in full view and only inches from his leaking cock— the damn thing looked sore by now, purple at the tip and just as desperate for attention as the rest of him.

When you pulled the fabric aside to show him your cunt, he hissed and looked away.

“Look at me, James, keep your eyes open,” you demanded, seeing how totally wrecked he looked when he turned his head back to you and stared down at your body with half-lidded eyes. “Look at how fucking soaked my pussy is. You remember how it feels to be inside it, don’t you?”

He swallowed, sighed, and finally (just barely) nodded.

“You remember how hot and wet and tight it is, don’t you?”

“Y-yes,” he choked.

“Well, that memory’s all you’ve got to work with, sweet boy, because I don’t think I’m ever gonna let you fuck this pussy again.”

He really, properly sobbed, tears streaming down his cheeks, and those arms flexed against the ropes defiantly. “N-no, please—”

“I’m gonna make myself come with this,” you promised, interrupting him as you grabbed the vibe, “and I want you to remember how it feels when I come around you, okay?

Turning it on, you wasted no time pressing it to your clit, moving the end of the toy in slow circles and keeping a close eye on him as he watched you. Your intention had always been to give him a show, but the embarrassing thing was how little of it was an act. Ironically, even though you’d been edging him this whole time, having to touch him that way without any pleasure for yourself was almost as torturous. You’d soaked through your panties by the time you had him tied up, to be totally honest. So, giving into it and letting yourself feel good was a breeze.

“Think about when I was riding you, James,” you instructed, your own voice clearly affected by your pleasure now. “Think about how good it would feel if I let you come inside me.”

“Oh, god,” he cried, leaning his head back.

“Think about my pussy milking every fucking drop of come out of you. You know I wouldn’t let you stop until I was completely full of your come, I bet you’d like that. I bet you’d like to eat your come out of me, you sick little pervert.”

“Fuck!” he yelped, tugging at the ropes harder now— for a second you thought he might really break them and jump you. And for a second, you knew you’d let him. It made your walls clench as you imagined facing the consequences of driving a man to the brink of insanity until he couldn’t help but fuck you like an animal. It was a good thing he didn’t see you bite your lip as you imagined that.

“You know what I’m thinking about?” you taunted.

“God, don’t tell me,” he sighed through his teeth, but obviously you ignored him.

“I’m thinking about what a good boy you are for me,” you cooed, your hips starting to rock up against where you held the end of the vibrator; you pressed it down harder onto your clit and moaned instantly. “Yeah, I’m thinking about how pretty you look when you’re all desperate and needy and fucking pathetic—”

“Oh—” he choked.

“My dumb litlte whore, that’s all you are, James,” you groaned. “I know you wish you could touch me, it’s all you can think about, right? That pretty head of yours would be completely empty if it weren’t for thoughts of me and how badly you want me. Right?”

“Yes,” he whispered huskily.

A shiver ran up your spine when the vibrator bumped into a more sensitive part of you, and you did it again and again until you thought you might lose it a bit faster than you meant to. “This toy feels really good,” you informed him in a purr, gasping when you slipped the vibrating body of it into your pussy, “but it doesn’t feel as good inside me as you do.”

His eyes fell shut but he still winced a bit every time you made a sound; he couldn’t run from this, no matter how hard he tried.

“Oh James,” you moaned loudly, fucking yourself with the vibe for a moment before you pulled it back out to focus even harder on your clit, “I’m gonna come. I’m so, so close… I can feel it getting stronger, I think I might make a mess on these sheets. And the only way I’m ever gonna let you come is if you watch me do it. So open your fucking eyes.”

He blinked quickly as he opened them, gaze scanning your whole body before settling on your cunt; you were sure he could see it pulsing as you got closer and closer, you knew he was imagining how it would feel. You only spared a brief glimpse at his cock, bobbing between his legs, and wished you could just slip it in you now and come while it stretched you out.

But that wasn’t what he was here for, sadly, and you were sure you were the only being truly denied of your desires, despite how it probably seemed from the outside.

“Oh my god,” you breathed, numbness starting to tingle in your legs as your orgasm built up quicker than even you expected. “I’m coming— James, I’m coming, oh, fuck… right there— yes!”

A gush of heat warmed your cunt at the same time that shocks ran up your spine and down your limbs; you could feel your legs shaking, and you knew he could, too.

It got so intense for a second that you had to pull the vibrator away, though you didn’t stop coming until a few moments later, eyes falling shut without you meaning for them to.

You actually laughed a bit, breathlessly, as you turned the vibe off and set it aside, although you weren’t sure exactly what was supposed to be funny about this per se. When you opened your eyes, you saw James looking down and looking positively defeated. But he looked tense, too, and you sat up on your wobbly legs to get closer to his face.

“Relax, James,” you told him firmly as you examined him.

“I— I can’t,” he whispered.

“Why not?”

“I’ll come.”

Nothing could fight your wide grin anymore, not when you heard that. “Oh, baby… are you about to come without even being touched? Is that how much you liked watching Mistress come?”

He nodded, ever so slightly, and you laughed. Not quite a mocking laugh, moreso impressed. Prideful, even. You leaned in to give a wet kiss to his neck, licking over his pulse as he shivered violently.

“That’s my good boy,” you whispered against his skin. He whined and you cooed soothingly right away, “oh I know, I know. It’s so unfair, isn’t it? Mistress gets to come and you don’t…”

“Please,” he stammered, “I’m so close, let me come, please.”

“But I don’t wanna see you come, baby— I wanna see you cry.”

You started to slide your hand down his chest and he jumped up to attention as he tried to squirm away. “No, please, don’t— don’t touch my cock, not if I can’t come.”

“You can hold it in, can’t you?” you pouted.

“No, I can’t, I can’t,” he sobbed, watching fearfully as your hand moved down to his stomach and over his hips.

“But I thought you were my good boy,” you frowned, suddenly wrapping your hand tight around his cock as he choked on a gasp.

“Mistress!” he sobbed. “Please, don’t— don’t move your hand, I’ll come.”

"Never fucking tell me what to do," you instructed firmly, just barely stroking as he cried weakly. "I'm gonna touch you however I want and you're not gonna come because you're my good boy, right?"

"No, Mistress, I can't stop it, I'm gonna come— stop, please…"

"You'd better not fucking come," you hissed through your teeth, speeding up your movements and watching his eyes shoot wide open, "you'd better hold it in until I'm done with you."

"I'm trying— please slow down, can't take it—"

You shook your head, tutting disapprovingly. "No, baby, I tell you what you can take."

"Oh— oh god, Mistress, please, please stop, please, I c-can't— fuck!"

You pulled your hand away the second his cock started to flex but it was too late: come was shooting from his swollen tip and painting his chest and stomach. You didn't even wait until he was done to backhand him across the face.

"I'm sorry!" he yelled. "I'm so sorry, I couldn't help it…"

You softened slightly when you heard his broken voice, saw the desperation and fear on his face— it was real, more real than the fake ‘no’s and the encouraging pleas for mercy. "Baby, it's okay, you tried so hard," you soothed instantly.

Hope filled his eyes just as much as tears as he looked up at you. "Am I still your good boy?"

"Always," you smiled, caressing his face where it was already turning red from your slap.

You reached down and caressed his cock with the back of your fingers, watching it flex weakly.

“Let’s get you cleaned up, alright?”

His lip twitched, almost like a wince. “Do we… do we have to stop?”

You quickly glanced at the clock. “Um, no,” you mumbled, “we still have time. Just tell me what you want.”

“I wanna watch you come again…” he admitted softly. “Is… is that okay?”

Although you weren’t sure what you’d been expecting, you were still surprised. “Yeah, sure.”

“But… but closer this time,” he added, “not so far away.”

You were literally laying on top of him, how did that count as far away?

“I wanna see your face,” he clarified.

“Okay,” you nodded, deciding to indulge him. It was sort of like aftercare, except that this wasn’t exactly the ‘after’ part yet.

On your knees beside where he was leaning back against the headboard, you slipped your hand down into the lace panties again, finding your clit still swollen but not too sensitive. A little gasp fell from your lips when you touched it, rubbing it carefully with two fingers while he looked up at your face.

You felt slightly exposed when he watched you this close, and you didn’t know where to look to avoid direct eye contact. Looking at his lips was just a little too tempting, so that wouldn’t work.

“My hands are a little tired,” you explained, “they might cramp up. Maybe I could use your thigh…”

“O-okay,” he nodded, and you removed your fingers from your panties to sit down on the thick muscle of his leg. You felt him tense up under you slightly, and you carefully began to rock your hips until your clit rubbed just right against the inside of your underwear. Surely he could feel how wet you were— actually, you both could hear it, almost a wet clicking-like noise as the soaked lace slid against your skin.

The dynamic shifted slightly, not that you minded it, as he watched you ride him carefully. Just as he couldn’t hide much from you when he was naked and tied up and baring his soul to you in the kinkiest way possible, you couldn’t hide your pleasure from him when he was looking at your face so up-close. You let your hands carefully roam his body, narrowly avoiding the trails of cooling come he’d left on his stomach and chest, until you found his strong shoulders and held onto them for balance.

“Fuck,” you mumbled to yourself, biting your lip as your sore clit throbbed against his hard, muscular thigh.

“Will you… could you kiss me?” he requested quietly, and your heart broke a little bit. You shook your head, and he nodded in understanding.

“I’ll kiss you here,” you offered instead, whispering against his skin before you pressed your lips to his forehead, then his cheek, then his jaw. “Is that better, James?”

“It helps,” he agreed in a sigh.

“I’m close,” you warned quietly, pressing your cheek to his and weaving one hand into his hair. “I’m gonna come again, on your thigh.”

“Let me touch you,” he begged, “just a little, please…”

You nodded, about to reach forward to untie one of his hands, but he snapped the ropes and you had totally forgotten he could do that. He quickly ran his touch all over your body, calloused hands and bound wrists in stark contrast to your soft skin. The metal one was a little cold but it didn’t bother you; the other was almost too hot, and it was like being warmed and cooled all at once.

He ran his fingers down your spine, he gripped one of your shoulders, he rubbed your legs: he did everything he must have been wishing he could do this whole time, even gasping as he ran one hand up your chest and over a cup of your bra. Just as you sensed that he was about to ask if he could touch you there, you nodded and felt his metal hand tug down the red lace and grab your breast— thankfully not very hard, though he did give your nipple a quick pinch which made you gasp.

Burying his face in the crook of your neck, he finally settled his hands on holding your hips, just tight enough to slightly guide your movements as you rocked faster and more desperately. “Please come,” he begged weakly, “Mistress, please… use me.”

It sort of hit you all at once then, like a punch to the gut. Except, you know, a lot more fun than getting punched in the gut.

“James,” you gasped, legs quivering where they straddled his as a new patch of slick soaked the lace (and presumably his thigh as well). He held you tight, kept you moving through it while your fingers tangled in his hair and your mouth fell slack for another, louder moan.

The way his lips moved over your skin, laving your collarbones and pulse point and the innermost corner of your jaw, was positively worshipful; reverent. “Mistress,” he whispered, almost sounding like praise but tinted with awe. Your movements slowed down to a stop and the two of you breathed a sigh together, unintentionally. “Thank you,” he mumbled.

“What for?” you asked, blinking quickly and looking down at him, coming back to reality (though you weren’t quite sure where else it was that you had just been).

“I dunno, everything,” he decided.

“Don’t thank me,” you smiled. “Keep paying me, though.”

He laughed a little, glancing away. “Yeah, and I’ll pay you back for these ropes… sorry."

"No, hey, don't be sorry," you dismissed, getting up off of his leg and standing up to go grab a towel for him. "I'm just sorry we still haven't found anything strong enough to hold you."

"It's fine, they're strong enough to make me stop myself when I want to do something I shouldn't, that's all that really matters."

You nodded to yourself as you dampened the towel and came back to wipe him off.

"I can do that for myself," he reminded you, sounding a bit embarrassed, but you thought it was sweet.

“You just focus on getting those ropes off of yourself,” you decided with a little smile.

#sub!bucky barnes x domme!reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut

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