#I think I’m depressed (again)

[nuppu-nuppu]

Ignore if you don’t want to read about me being stupid once again

#pls dont read if you cant handle venting and whining #once again i am here to say that i am the loneliest person alive and i feel like i can’t grasp the basic consept of friendship and do it lol #like idk how to be friends #i feel like i will forever be sad and lonely #and i know everyone will say you can talk to me and i know that but i’ve just been by myself for so long that i don’t remember how to have #actual conversations with people i feel like i am disconnected from reality #i feel like i am an extremely unlikeable person and that’s why i was all alone in highschool and idk i am oversharing on the internet again #because it’s the only place i kind of feel safe doing it #pls take care of yourselves first before comfoting me or anything im sorry i sound very pathetic #how do i start living again #how does one live anyway #im just in my head all the time #this was supposed to be hot girl summer but it’s once again summertime sadness #im so stupid!!! #im so anxious and depressed that i dont know what to do with myself #im so sorry for oversharing i have a therapist dont worry im kind of taking care of myself #but the eternal loneliness just wont let me go #idk how to be a person anymore #i’m just sad #thinking of going to a church and pretend to be a believer so i could have a community again lol

[lunaryuwu]

MY ART FOR THE BMC ZINE!!!

#tbh i think i could’ve done better #compared to all the other art on the zine i just. dhvdhsbsjbsjajak. feel so insecure. #kinda fucked up this one #lineart is my sworn enemy i’m never doing it again #then again i was sleep deprived stressed and particularly depressed while making this so yeah. kinda can’t justify that. #technically this was a semi vent art of my trying to make myself feel better #oh well #didn’t have anybtime to contribute more but i wanted to do SOMETHING #luna’s art #be more chill #jeremy heere

[communistkenobi]

my friend explained to me kafka’s retelling of Odysseus and the sirens and I think that is the perfect way you would write a sith obi-wan arc, following anakin in an attempt to rescue him. like Odysseus ties himself to the mast of his ship because he wants to hear the sirens without being tempted, but he hears nothing because he plugged his ears with wax and goes insane and wants his men to go closer towards the rocks so he can hear them. like I think obiwans arrogance would blind him to any temptation and make him believe he’s completely immune to it, all the while he’s miles deep into the dark side, thinking the entire time that the problem is that he hasn’t heard the sirens yet

#I think the kafka story is more vague and inconclusive than this but I’m massaging it for mind palace purposes #anyway ough if I was less depressed I might be compelled to write fanfiction again #sw.txt #it’s unfortunate that virtually all sith obiwan content is shipping related because I think the concept is very good #alas such is the state of fandom

[wigglys-dikrats]

it’s sad boi hours:

the reason pete was so ready to take the bullet was because he wanted to be back with ruth and richie

#it’s 6 am and i can’t sleep and i’m listening to the show and making myself sad #part of me wishes we could’ve seen pete mourning his friends but another part of me is glad we didn’t get it #because i would not have survived seeing joey cry again #i have seen the show twenty times and cool as i think i am (reprise) still makes me cry #this show makes me sad #pete spankoffski #joey richter #steph lauter #mariah rose faith casillas #lautski #richie lipschitz #jon matteson #ruth fleming #lauren lopez #i am emo #i have depression #and insomnia #npmd #npmd spoilers #nerdy prudes must die #nerdy prudes must die spoilers #cool as i think i am #starkid #team starkid #hatchetfield #hatchetverse #my post

[morkiemcfly]

When you realize that when Link gets the Master Sword, he doesn’t swing it around like usual. Instead he respectfully bows his head to the blade because he now knows what’s up. Just like Zelda did when she realized what she had to do. It’s like he’s reassuring both her and Fi that he WILL do whatever it takes to defeat Ganondorf and save Hyrule.

#I am so normal about this game #literally all my posts about it are either stupid or depressing #the legend of zelda #tears of the kingdom #totk spoilers #tears of the kingdom spoilers #zelda #legend of zelda #zelda: tears of the kingdom #princess zelda #like really at this point he thinks he’s never going to see Zelda again #so it’s like his final goodbye to her #I’m sobbing now

[aceofstars16]

Y’all all know I’m back on a Gravity Falls kick so…I drew my favorite six fingered nerd 🥰

Original art from Lost Legends, I pretty much just did a redraw lol

#gravity falls #stanford pines #ford pines #gravity falls fanart #stanford pines fanart #ford pines fanart #gf stanford #gf ford #gravity falls lost legends #lost legends #so many tags lol #aceo draws things #I will spare y’all the sappy stuff I wrote on my instagram post #but in short I’m very grateful for the break I’ve gotten from horrible depression the past week #and I’m just grateful I can feel happy again thank you God #ford has always been a comfort character to me but I think he’s even more of one now tbh #i understand him and Stan a…a lot more now from own personal experience and it just makes their story more meaningful to me you know?

[cascade05]

Is anyone else obsessed with poetic compliments?

Like… not just calling someone pretty but…

“His hair was like snow and his skin like frost. He looked like a creature made of porcelain moonlight with eyes like glistening stars. Words could not describe how ethereal he looked when basking in the moon’s gentle glow,” she spoke softly.

“And I remember him that way. A man made of stardust, a man who looked to be the very moon itself...”

“I find him in the moon because that was always what he was to me. The moon, soft and gentle. He was brighter than anyone else, as if he belonged in the heavens not on earth as a man, but in the sky as a celestial body.”

“He is the moon in the sense that his pure and beautiful…”

She swallowed thickly, voice soft and tender as she spoke again. “And he is the moon in the sense that he is far out of my reach,” she whispered, a single tear falling from her eye.

And not just saying you like someone’s strength or that you think they’re handsome but…

“You say that as if you don’t look like a fallen star.”

“What do you mean by that?”

She smiled softly, kissing the tip of his perfect nose as her hands moved down his neck then to his shoulders.

“Dark,” she whispered, kissing his jaw, “perfect,” she kissed his neck, “and pure,” she kissed his throat softly.

“It’s as if the sky fell onto earth,” she whispered, her lips ghosting along his throat as her hands skipped over his wounded chest and gently moved against his stomach.

“A man made of steel and rock, my own meteor,” she breathed against him, kissing his collarbone.

“My own piece of heaven.”

Cause shit like that just makes me 🫧🫧🫧🫧🫧 frreeal

#when i wrote this shit i think i cried #the first one 4sure cause that was a daughter talking about how much she missed her father and it was very depressing #plus i was listening to some seriously depressing music #the second one i was just giddy about cause sometimes my brain just works #damn #poetic #writting #the hobbit #thranduil #thorin oakenshield #tolkien elves #dwarves #the elvenking #the hobbit thorin #the hobbit fanfiction #the hobbit x oc #kinda wrote this shit in a moment of weakness and now i’m low key part of the hobbit/lotr fandom again #it’s been so long

[cartoonchaos]

“gee i wonder why there’s still so much more fanfiction about male characters” “we need more morally complex female characters” “i love relationships that are doomed by the narrative” “more stories need to treat mentally ill characters with compassion and respect” “all his problems could’ve been fixed if he only went to therapy” you fuckers can’t even handle the ending of fionna and cake

#i’m not one to go online and complain fruitlessly about how media literacy is in the toilet but jesus christ #it’s actually devastating seeing so many people actively reject a brilliant and emotionally challenging show #all because they refuse to examine anything about themselves #if you’re genuinely pissed petrigrof wasn’t endgame and the show couldn’t quote unquote let them be happy #if you’re seriously mad your favorite doomed yuri was in fact doomed by the narrative #if you can’t enjoy petrigrof anymore because you now know it’s quote unquote problematic or toxic and not a perfect tragedy #please i beg of you watch it again #this show beat you over the head with a children’s book and then you misunderstood it somehow and then whined about your headache #and if you for realsies believe this show is pushing an unhealthy message with how it handled simon’s depression #this show that showed him so much compassion and understanding and gave him closure and let him move on and grow and seek help #if you think betty was too harsh on him #the betty that sentenced the man who doomed her to life #to live a happy and healthy life #to seek help and grow and become an individual not defined by his grief #if you think that’s seriously equivalent to telling a depressed person to just cheer up #then you are legitimately anti-recovery #i really hope you guys learn how to engage healthily with complex media #one would’ve thought steven universe taught us all a lesson #but i guess a million casper and nova level stories won’t be enough for some of you #here’s hoping you don’t just kin simon but actually follow his example #get therapy #loony rambles #fionna and cake #simon petrikov #betty grof #petrigrof #adventure time

[l0vefreak]

Of everything she has you have absolutely nothing, she has everything too much, so you take some. At first just a little. It blooms. You are in agony. Norma Jean Baker of Troy

#rgu #revolutionary girl utena #utena tenjou #anthy himemiya #sku #shoujo kakumei utena #Anne Carson quote hehe I’m so silly in my depression month 💕💕💕💕 #art #(utena has sword at end but I don’t think that’s as clear as I wanted it to be lol maybe I’ll do the same shtick again

[monsterrae1]

✨Inspiration Saturday✨

Welcome to me once again collecting tags through the week and doing them all in one tag game, thanks to everyone who keeps tagging me all thing through the week, I love seeing what y’all are cooking up! Here’s a moodboard and snippet of something I'm currently calling the Hire to Kill Au:

Tagged through the week by: @jesuisici33 @spotsandsocks @heartbeatdiaz @rogerzsteven @prince-buck-diaz @panbuckley @honestlydarkprincess @buddierights @the-likesofus @hippolotamus @shortsighted-owl @ebdaydreamer @bekkachaos @cowboydiazes

Snippet:

He had designed his life to be devoid and empty of things that made him feel anything, afraid that once that he gave in into it, it was going to destroy him and crumble the image of himself he had worked hard for years to maintain. Maddie sometimes looked at him and her eyes filled with sadness, wiping away tears that she thought Buck hadn’t seen, probably mourning the bright and loud child he had once been.

That Buck wasn’t dead, he was just buried so deep inside this new Buck that he wasn’t sure he was ever going to see the light of day again. Maybe if he ever got out of this business, but Buck didn’t like to busy himself with these kinds of hypotheticals.

He was a killer, truth be told, he was probably going to die on the field, with a knife strapped to his calves and another in his thigh, and a gun in his hand, covered in blood.

He had gotten a ping earlier in the day letting him know that there was a new target waiting for him already, so after he was done with his workout, he ordered in some food, took a shower and then went down to the lobby of his building to pick up his food and his mail, making sure the “amazon” envelop was secured under his arm and then made his way up the stairs again, sitting down on his couch once he was back and opening the parcel.

EDMUNDO “EDDIE” DIAZ. Was the name printed on top of the folder, it would be the last name Buck ever read on a folder like this, it would be the name that would change the course of his life, but Buck didn’t exactly know that yet, for now all that he knew was that Eddie was a widower, he used to be an army medic - honorably discharged with a silver star, which was impressive - and he currently was a firefighter living in L.A.

Buck frowned, he had never gotten a local job before, and while he wouldn’t complain about cutting down on his travel time, he felt weird about it. He felt even more confused when he saw his timeframe, three months. Buck had never been given so much time before to complete a mission.

Something wasn’t sitting right with him. Whoever this Eddie dude was, there was something different about this assignment.

Tagging if they wanna share anything at all @brokenribsdiaz @loveyourownsmiilee @cowboy-buddie @gentoodiaz @alyxmastershipper @heartshapedvows @satashiiwrites @mysteriouslyyounggalaxy @exhuastedpigeon and whoever else wants to do this!

#inspiration saturday #I am once again apologizing for disappearing all week #buddie #buddie wip #wip you had to kill me #this is going to be a dark comedy cause I’m depressed and think I’m funny

[ghosts-cyphera]

Hello! Just wanted to check in, I've gotten the notification that you posted something twice in the last few days, and both times the post just wouldn't load and doesn't appear. Is everything alright? Did you delete the posts or it's just tumblr being weird?

aaaw hi darling !!

it’s just lo being lo. one was a shameful sleepy horny post, and the most recent one was a selfie that I posted for a full minute before chickening out of it, lol.

thank you so much for checking in. that’s very sweet of you but I’m also very sorry to have worried you 💗 !!

#I always forget that some of you absolute sweethearts have your notifications on for wee me #feels so crazy aaa #and that’s why I always think that no one will notice if I take down a post #anyhow !! for the past week or so I actually felt really really incredibly good for the first time in months #and for a little while I allowed myself to hope that my depression had finally eased #but now the past couple of days have been tougher again and I notice all the warning signs of another rough patch coming up #so I’m focusing on self-care and on trying to be patient with myself #healing is not linear and all that !! #I adore you #thank you for checking in #lo answers

[myfriendtheghost]

had a GVF dream last night and naturally in my dream I had to log onto tumblr and tell everyone about my experience

so here I am fulfilling the prophecy

#I miss them 😔 #I dreamt that I went all the way to LA to see one of their shows at a small outdoor venue #very intimate and there was no pit !!! It was GA but no pit !!! CHAIRS #and the venue accommodated for my visual disability and let me in early so for the first time in my life I had a good view at a GVF show LOL #Jake was wearing the dragon suit from DIG #I think Sam was wearing his original DIG suit too? it was also black #Danny was wearing his Starcatcher outfit #and Josh was wearing a new jumpsuit that was white and BEJEWELED FROM HEAD TO TOE #it was sooo sparkly and pretty #so then they played a song and it was a cover (I don’t remember what song) and I was like well that’s kinda weird #and then oomf showed up and talked through the ENTIRE SECOND SONG (also a cover that I don’t remember) #and I was like well if he keeps doing this after the second song then I’m gonna tell him to be quiet #BUT THEN THEY LEFT AFTER THE SECOND SONG AND I WAS LIKE 🧍🏻‍♀️ #but then I was like … well that’s the best view I’ve ever had seeing GVF so at least there’s that #anyway I haven’t listened to the boys in a hot minute but I might have to jam out on the way to church idk! #after that I had a different dream that I flew to Texas with my friend and I wanted to go to the American Girl store so I did and he left me #behind and got another flight without me KDHSJSKA ?!???? #I had a lot of random and vivid dreams last night lmao #anywho…. love yall miss yall !!!! #life is finally calming down a bit but my depression is also starting to rear its ugly head again so WOMP #u win some u lose some

[shima-draws]

Big shoutout to One Piece for awakening my motivation and inspiration to draw when it was dormant for *checks calendar* over a year

#It’s been a LONG ass time since I’ve drawn this much. And this often #Like I want to say since 2022 probably #I think depression was a big part of why I just. Did no art last year #(And also the fact that I was physically unable to for 6 months haha thanks back problems!) #But yeah. YEAH. I haven’t been this motivated and hyperfixated since I was churning out Tododeku AUs #I missed this I really did 😭 It’s soooo nice to want to draw and have ideas and be willing to actually sit down and do it #Thank you OP for my LIFE. #Shima speaks #Again I’m just sitting here and letting the inspiration lead me #Another reason why I’ve been drawing so much is bc I KNOW I’ll hit a wall at some point #So I want to churn out as much art as possible before then…LMAO #Me to me: Draw draw draw DRAW DRAW BEFORE YOU STOP WANTING TO #Me: Yes boss okay boss on it boss!

[wiiwarechronicles]

Insane to me that even friends of mine will admit they just see me as girl lite. Sick dude sick to know you only refer to me with female pronouns in private and find it funny to compare me to real boys because of the juxtaposition that’s really awesome.tell me again about how your gender is little guy

#im so constantly depressed I barely dress myself every day and I never cut my hair nd despite everything I’ve said to them im still a woman #to other high schoolers because I’m not decked out nd don’t fit into a specific style subculture #my face is so feminine and the only people that ever compliment it think im a woman #but again I don’t get many compliments on it at all because I’ve got autism face and constant eye bags #it’s really not as funny as people think to constantly remind me how weak and small I am #im. so weak #ahhhhahahaaasaaaaafalls on my face #she was completely right im good to have around but in more of a pet way than anything else #because the minute I expect respect from people I’m setting myself up for disappointment #lol #maidsmess

[finneyblakes]

maybe an unpopular opinion but i really don’t think tbp needs any sort of sequel or prequel, especially not one focused on the child rapist antagonist lmao. it just completely goes against the point of the movie in the first place and what made it an effective and immersive story about victims prevailing against abusers.

the only way i could see it maaayyybe working is if it’s max-centric, oddly enough, because i don’t even particularly like him very much and he’s kind of a comic-relief character. but if they were to go the prequel “origin story” route i think that would be the best way to maintain the essence of the original while also exploring uncharted territory. idk man

#and tbh i’m just tired of the ‘abhorrent POS man origin/redemption’ stories in general lol #they’re rarely done tastefully and tv/movies r just way oversaturated with it now #but even in the case of max i can’t see any way to do a prequel without it being extremely dark #which isn’t necessarily bad of course. dark and depressing movies can be good. but again #hard to keep it in good flow with its predecessors if it’s overly dark #but yeah i just think any sequel/prequel would be hard to pull off and just generally not necessary #¯\_(ツ)_/¯ #the black phone #text #mine