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#I’m on book 33 so I’m sure I’ll get to Law eventually
shanalikeanna · 9 months
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Okay anon you got me haha, I love this too much not to post.
I just started reading One Piece, and I haven’t met Law yet. But Rachel told me that him and Chopper have something in common and this is my own personal headcanon.
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chateautae · 3 years
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maybe i do | kth. I
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➵ summary :  maybe you love each other, maybe you don’t. when a deal between your fathers leaves you forcefully wedding kim taehyung, arguably seoul’s most powerful CEO, you’re prepared for a loveless marriage of eternal regret and unhappiness. but maybe, it doesn’t turn out that way after all.
↳  part of the high-class series!
➵ pairing : taehyung x reader
➵ genre :  arranged marriage!au, ceo!tae, s2l!au, eventual smut, fluff, angst 
➵ rating : 18+
➵ word count : 11k
➵ warnings : swearing, alcohol consumption, anxiety, lots of feels about marriage, a stupid ex (reader’s), mentions of bad sexual experiences with ex (there’s consent, just bad sex that makes the reader feel shitty), does ceo tae count as a warning? 
➵ a/n: hello my first fic of my favourite trope arranged marriage, AND with kim taehyung?? yes pls !! this will be a series and I’ll be actively working on it so you don’t have to wait too long for chapters, i hope you can follow this series with me <33
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chapter one : “my forever’s falling down”  
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“Another one, Father? I thought I told you my secretary would be handling marriage profiles from now on. Stop concerning yourself with who I marry.” 
“But I do, son. Trust me, I know this girl, she’s the daughter of a trusted friend and I think she’s a good match.” 
“Father, everyone you choose for me I dislike and it’s distracting me from my work. I don’t need this right now.” 
“She’s different, Taehyung. I personally know her and I’m certain you won’t say no.” 
“And why is that?” 
“There’s something about her you won’t refuse, son, you’ll notice it when you meet her.” 
“I don’t want to meet her, Father. Like I said, I need to work.” 
“I just knew you’d act this way. Want to know something, son? I’ve made her part of a business deal, you can’t back out of this.”
“What? You made her part of a business deal?! Why would you-”
“Because you wouldn’t have given her a chance otherwise, you haven’t been giving anyone a chance since I’ve been setting up potential partners for you and I’m sick of it. You said you were open to an arranged marriage, where’s that attitude now?”
“Because, Father, I have a company to run and that’s-”
“No. I will not allow you to reduce your life to just this company. There are far more enjoyable things in life than a business.”
“But Father-”
“No, Taehyung. One thing you need to learn is balance. If you don’t give anyone or anything a chance you will live a lonely life behind your desk. Even in this cutthroat world of business where you can lose money or be betrayed by anyone at any moment, the most painful thing to suffer is loneliness, and I won’t let you live in this world alone.”
“Dad-”
“You will meet this girl, Taehyung, end of discussion.” 
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“Dad! I told you I want nothing to do with your company, how could you let me get dragged into this?!” 
“Y/N-ie, I know you value the life you have without any of my help, but let me help just this once, especially with finding a husband. I’m being offered the deal of a lifetime and I can’t refuse, he just happens to be part of it. I need this for the company, please.”
“But Dad, I don’t even know him. And if he’s the CEO of some rich company he’s probably an asshole, I’m not doing this.” 
“Y/N-ie, trust me, I know his son. He’s a sincere, hard-working man, I promise.”
“Yeah, right. Even if that’s the case, I still don’t know him, let alone love him, Dad. How can you make me marry someone I don’t love?”
“Because you can learn to love him. There are no rules concerning the way two people should fall in love, love doesn’t always need to come first.”
“But Dad-”
“My daughter, I have not asked you for many things in my life, but this is one thing I must ask of you. Please, just meet him, don’t say no without even trying.”
“Dad, I don’t know-”
“Please, Y.N, do it for me. If not for the company or money, please do it for me.”
And here you were, fidgeting with the tips of your nails, tuning in and out of the present world and overthinking every aspect of your life that somehow lead you to this moment. Sitting on a Leather Italia couch in what was described to be Mr. Kim’s study; listening to your father’s incessant, albeit wholesome chatter next to you with your future in-laws across. 
And next to them was their suave, unreadable son sitting in a relaxed manner, flipping his attention between your fathers’ conversation and anything else in the room.
You on the other hand, were utterly high strung due to the fact that your father failed to mention your future fiancé’s identity until 30 minutes before arriving here, having done a quick search in the car to unveil who he exactly was.
And that’s when it hit you. You weren’t marrying just anyone, you were getting married to Kim Taehyung. The infamous CEO of Kim Enterprises—Korea’s largest software development and manufacturing company, rivaling to be one of the largest in the world. He was part of Seoul’s most prestigious circle of businessmen, having made multiple Forbes international lists of Most Successful, Youngest, Richest, and is even one of Korea’s most eligible bachelors, not just Seoul.
If this wasn’t already taking you out, then it was definitely the fact that his photos through a measly Google search did him absolutely, utterly and completely no justice. They simply could never capture the truth of just how handsome Kim Taehyung was in real life. You couldn’t deny it, he wasn’t just good-looking, he was stunning, gorgeous, seemed as though God had created the universe, heaven and hell in 6 days and left the 7th just to create him. 
He was like a work of art, worthy of being placed in the finest of museums and left untouched, unsodden by the ugliness of humanity. It made you feel extremely inferior to him in an instant. It was sickening, he was sickening, intoxicating, and quite frankly, intimidating.
It was his look, his undivided stare when he eventually settled his sight on you. It didn’t matter his dark hair that landed and perfectly curled above his eyes, the way he occasionally licked his plush lips or how his long, tall legs spread out before him, it was his look that made you want to turn tail and run.  
It seemed to reach into your soul, peer straight through whatever façade, walls or defense mechanisms you could spend years building only to have his simple look tear it down in minutes. He was alluring, captivating, left you wanting to cower into whatever hole you could dig yourself into or discover all the secrets he hid behind those enchanting eyes.
Kim Taehyung was many things you couldn’t quite wrap your head around, though you assessed your priorities and decided they didn’t just include him, but mainly the significance of the current meeting taking place right now. 
It wasn’t a mere one-time business deal to discuss a project, it was a meeting that entailed the partnership of both your family companies and would define the next however many years of your life. More specifically, spending it with the exact same man that looked at you without a single readable expression on his face. 
You distracted yourself by trying to observe as many useless things as you could, flitting around the room many times before suddenly glancing at Taehyung’s index finger coming up to rest against his lips.
You zeroed your vision in more. 
Is that a cut on his finger?
“Jae-in, of course! This is just as important to me as it is to you, your son is a remarkable CEO, and I’m sure he’ll make an amazing husband.” 
“Aish, Namhyun, you flatter me too much. My son may be handsome, though your daughter is even more beautiful. I’m very sure she will make a wonderful wife.”
“Yes, Namhyun, your daughter is absolutely gorgeous! Just as gorgeous as her mother. I know she wasn’t able to make it, though may I ask where your wife is tonight?” 
“Ah, unfortunately, she’s out of the country. Though I was hoping my presence would be enough to fill in for her, am I doing a bad job?” 
Laughter erupted from the parents in the room, meanwhile, Taehyung couldn’t help but notice the way you immediately winced at the mention of your mother. Something he definitely wouldn’t miss with the way he found himself examining your every move. 
It was habitual to him, something born out of his roots in business, only for the purpose of calculating and reading people like an open book. 
He knew you’d also become victim to that habit, though oddly enough, he found himself quite interested in observing you. He had already figured you out; you hated business, there was a clear disconnection between yourself and your father’s company and you reeked of a sense of independence that funnily contradicted the antsy way you bounced your leg. 
Your way of speech, however, mannerisms, gestures, your look; it was all professional enough you clearly have some sort of background in business. You seemed like an heiress to Taehyung, which you were, though you oddly had no interest in business?   
All these details piqued his interest, curious of just who you exactly were, but he was mainly intrigued by the mysterious claim his father made upon mentioning you for the first time. 
‘There’s something about her you won’t refuse.’
That had raked Taehyung’s brain consistently for the past hour now, crossing his legs loosely and his arms folded over his chest, contemplating over and over again as he looked at you, what’s so damn special about her? 
‘You’ll notice it when you meet her,’ the words rang in his ears.
That was the driving force behind his calculation, observation, near inability to take his eyes off of you as he learned new things nearly every minute and led him closer to understanding his father.  
He could tell you were an anxious person, though hid it behind a persona of false confidence. You had a tendency to stick close to your father despite observing you don’t rely on him for much of anything, even less your mother. The softness behind your every movement despite being from a business background where you should be harsh, rigid, rough around the edges, and yet you seemed entirely different.
Taehyung then realized how inherently dissimilar you were to many of the other women he met. They were all relatively of the same cut and look. Cold, sharp, cunning. All women of pure business; daughters, granddaughters or straight CEOs of wealthy companies, simply interested in marriage as a deal or an advantage rather than a commitment. 
And there was absolutely nothing wrong with that. Taehyung was a man of business himself, married to his work, his home behind a desk and the company the only thought occupying his mind 24/7.
But with you, you were interesting, unlike the others and it made him curious.
Taehyung also couldn’t help but notice you were...pretty. You weren’t too overly sexy nor too innocent, you were pretty. There was an elegance to your looks, features like your hair and eyes complementing you as a whole, and he couldn’t miss that you felt oddly...warm.
Taehyung found himself beginning to understand his father’s original viewpoint, considering the possibility he could’ve been correct. 
You just seemed different. 
“Ah, that seems to be everything. Exact details about the wedding have already been put in place by us.”
“Yes! We’ve been waiting for our TaeTae to get married for so long. We’ve had plans for months now and we can finally move forward with them! You and Y/N don’t need to worry about anything!” 
“Mom, did you really just call me that in front of my future fiancé?” 
“Oh, let it go, son. It won't be long before she calls you that, too!” 
Taehyung could only playfully roll his eyes at his overly excited mother, you scrunching your nose at the embarrassment.
“That’s incredibly generous of you, Mr. and Mrs. Kim, though my conscience is not one to let such things go. My family should contribute to the wedding in some way. Y/N and I would be happy to do so.”
“Why don’t we discuss that outside? I believe we should give the future couple some time alone, shall we?” 
You and Taehyung exchanged a quick look before standing up and respectively addressing either’s parents, Taehyung shutting the door behind them once they exited and having turned to look at you, an awkward silence piercing the air. 
There it was again, his look. It was irrefutably the one reason you avoided eye contact with him, you felt he would swallow you up if you shared even 5 seconds between each other.
“So...” Taehyung suddenly broke the ice, eyeing you.
“So...” 
“Marriage, huh?” 
“Yeah, marriage. Never done that one before.” If there wasn’t a time you vehemently hated yourself, then it was undoubtedly now. You internally facepalmed at your dumb comment, adding a laugh at the end in embarrassment only to look away. 
“Uh..yeah.” Taehyung laughed awkwardly. “Me neither, if you didn’t already know.” He tucked his hands into his pockets and looked away, you fidgeting by the couches everyone previously occupied. 
A beat of silence passed as you both exchanged looks between objects in the room and each other, either of you pursing your lips or blowing light raspberries to cut the awkwardness. 
“I wanted to ask you something.” 
“Hm?” You turned towards him, lips just a pout as your doe-eyes awaited him. 
Taehyung didn’t miss that at all. 
“Um, your mother. I apologize if this is intrusive of me, though I couldn’t help but notice I’ve never actually met her. May I ask where she is?” 
You let out a dry chuckle before answering, another detail that didn’t slip Taehyung’s attention. “Trust me, Taehyung, one thing you’ll never have to worry about during this entire ordeal is my mother. She should be the last thing on your mind.” You assured him with what he could tell was your fakest smile, distracting him from the realization you’d said his name for the first time.
“Are you sure? I’ll be meeting her at the wedding so-”
“You won’t. I don’t think you will. Even if she does make it, it takes very little to impress her, just be yourself and she’ll love you.” You stated with a sense of finality, as though the topic should be dropped. 
“Be myself? I’m one of the best businessmen in Korea. It’s my job to get people to like me, easy stuff.” He casually gloated. 
“You don’t only have to be a businessman to do that,” you paused and looked at him, “you can just be Kim Taehyung, too.” You spoke nonchalantly, eyes lingering with his for longer than 5 seconds and he, in fact, had not swallowed you yet. 
Taehyung instantly furrowed his eyebrows, taken aback as if your suggestion was something outlandish, absurd, maybe even offending.
Nobody has ever said such a thing to him, not throughout the entirety of his life. 
Taehyung tried his best to recover, searching for another topic of conversation before he was cut off by your rather soft voice, he noticed. 
“Oh, I wanted to give you this.” You stepped towards him, reaching into your purse and retrieving something Taehyung couldn’t quite see. You strided over and extended your hand, Taehyung finding himself even more confused.
“A bandage?” 
“Mhm. For the cut on your finger. You should probably clean it and apply something before putting this on.” You stated nonchalantly once again, offering him a small smile whilst holding out the bandage. 
“Uh...” Taehyung started but couldn’t complete his sentence, lost on how you even observed something as small as his cut and spoke of treating it like it was an actual injury.  
After his struggle to form a sentence, you grew bold enough to gently remove his hand from his pocket and place the bandage in his palm, looking back up at him. You shared a momentary look with his chocolate eyes, instantly scrambling after realizing your hand was still in his.
He has really big hands. 
“We should um...probably go.” You avoided his eyes, stepping aside quickly to pull the door open.
Taehyung’s mind felt displaced, eyebrows furrowed in confusion at the fact that someone had actually left him with nothing to say, an extremely rare occurrence in his book.
He was even more displaced looking at the measly wrapper in his hand, then at the cut on the side of his finger, playing through the last 5 minutes of what just happened.
He scoffed to himself.
‘There’s something about her you won’t refuse.’
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It had been 3 weeks since that meeting, not having seen Taehyung once as you wasted your time enjoying single life luxuries before you prepared for one of marriage.
It still felt odd to say such a thing, marriage, because it didn’t even feel like one, or a real one at that. It was forced, fake, a pressured one out of convenience. It felt more like a deal, something Taehyung and yourself had to settle for in order to keep your parents’ minds at ease.
That thought racked your brain all those 3 weeks; Taehyung had to settle for you, he didn’t choose you, just as much as you settled for him and didn’t choose him either. You both had ultimately agreed to the marriage only in an effort to optimize your parents’ happiness, not your own.
You had no clue how he felt, a mystery as much as the Bermuda Triangle, knowing he most certainly had a grand pick of women to choose from and you were most definitely his worst option.
You knew you were suddenly dumped on him, leaving him no choice in the matter as you learned your marriage entailed a beneficial business deal between your fathers’ companies, and Taehyung couldn’t really refuse you with so much on the line.
You had already felt inferior to Taehyung since the moment you met him, though your insecurities seeped further into the crevices of your doubtful mind the more you thought over that sad fact, contemplating a married life with him. In your opinion you were pretty much undesirable to him, Taehyung probably kicking himself knowing he had to unwillingly call you his wife for the rest of his life. 
You just knew you weren’t good enough for him, you would never measure up no matter how hard you’d try and that utterly terrified you. You were confident and independent when it came to yourself, though wedding a near perfect being regarded as one of Seoul’s finest in terms of a CEO and a man? 
Confidence be damned, this dude was intimidating. 
These were the feelings that swarmed your head as you sulked at your over-the-top engagement party, set up in a prestigious buildings’ gorgeous 37th floor riddled with baroque styling and embellishments, classical music gracing some of Seoul’s wealthiest patrons as their flutes clinked and snobby chatter filled the hall. 
It was all extremely high-status, reeking of upper class supremacy and quite frankly, it made you want to throw up.
You distracted yourself by bringing any and all types of alcohol to your lips, trying to focus on anything but your daunting thoughts.
The entire night you hadn’t talked to Taehyung, both of you having been too occupied with the numerous amounts of people meeting and congratulating you. This became a genuine nuisance as you’d mentioned before, this marriage was of convenience, one that brought families and companies together merrily and constituted hundreds of people attending your engagement party you didn’t really know.
Your friends were excited, over-the-moon you bagged a man like Taehyung and chastised you for not having told them about your engagement to him earlier. Your relatives similarly scolded you, pinching your cheeks and praising Taehyung like he was a God while they scrunched their noses at you for concealing him.
How could I tell you when I didn’t even know myself?, you thought.
It was funny they praised your ‘choice’ of a fiancé, positive nobody was saying the same to Taehyung without at least lying. The public only knew of you as your father’s daughter, never having seen you due to your vehement absence from anything remotely related to his company, and much of the business world in general. 
You weren’t part of that world, a world of greed and money-driven lunatics. It just wasn't you. It never suited you, left you with a bad taste in your mouth you constantly grimaced at and thought maybe you were the insane one for not understanding its flavour. As you grew older, however, you came to realize it simply wasn’t the path meant for you, someone who valued the independence and achievement of earning something for yourself, by yourself.
Ever since the inception of that principal, your young teenage self resolved you didn’t want to rely on your father’s wealth, especially not his influence or power to achieve your own place in life.
Your father had worked determinedly hard for years in order to stand as high he does now, warranting your acute admiration for your role model of a father, his now successful architecture business landing him a few buildings part of the Seoul skyline.
And after finally achieving his dream, it suddenly morphed into your own aspiration. His hard work drove you to want your own design part of Seoul’s breathtaking scenery as well, by means of your own effort, your own hard work. You didn’t want your father’s help. It felt wrong, like you were cheating if you used him to gain your place and so you condemned your life to one that separated yours and his. 
So you lived, worked and earned money without any of his influence.
You worked for an average architecture company where you felt comfortable, happy that you were away from the suffocating high-status business of your family. And although your detachment left your identity a mystery to many, your situation on the other hand was an extremely infamous one.
‘The-runaway-heiress’, was your staple trademark. The judgmental comments about your choice of life and the insults it warranted were never-ending, subjected to that criticism all your life.
There was no doubt Taehyung was hearing all of that, people probably warning him to step out of the marriage before it was too late. You weren’t like Taehyung, who was perfect, desirable, someone everyone either wanted or wanted to be. It left you glad and quite frankly, proud to be wedding a man of such caliber and incredibility, though left you wondering why in God’s name he would ever agree to marry someone like you; average, average and well, average.
“That’s your 5th shot, Y/N, slow the fuck down.” Your best friend Hana’s voice pulled you out of your thoughts, snatching the shot glass from your grasp. “It wouldn’t be cool if you were trashed at your own party, dummy.” 
Her sudden appearance brought a smile to your face. “I know, I just don’t feel well.” You sighed by the counter of the bar, seated atop a stool as you circled an empty shot glass mindlessly. 
“I get you, there’s like, hundreds of people here and you’re probably hearing a lot of different shit.” Hana appealed to you, having read your emotions like an open book. “Speaking of people, I wanted to ask, what’s up with Taehyung and his stare?”
You stifled a snort, looking at Hana’s incredulous face. “It’s just a habit of his. He stares at everyone.”
“Okay... sure, but I didn’t mean everyone, I meant you.” Hana emphasized, comically pointing.
You furrowed your eyebrows at her, arm leaning against the bar’s counter as you questioned, “What do you mean?”
“He doesn’t really stop staring at you, which is kinda weird. Unless you like that, I don’t judge people’s kinks.” Hana mockingly held her hands up in surrender, gauging a reaction out of you. 
You instantly grimaced, “It’s not a kink, Hana. Nice joke by the way, wanna sign up for SNL with that one?”
“I’m serious! I’ve been catching him just looking at you and I don’t know if it’s weird or hot.” Hana informed as you became more puzzled, her becoming oddly excited, “Awh, maybe he’s concerned with how much you keep drinking! That’s so romantic.” She chimed, looking off into the distance dreamily.
“Shut the fuck up, he wouldn’t do that.” You smacked her arm, snatching your shot glass back from her. “Besides, you’re one of the rare people who knows this marriage is fake, you know he doesn’t care.”
“Jheez, way to kill romance?” Hana rolled her eyes, smacking your arm in rebuttal before continuing. “I’m serious, though. This may be fake but he really does keep looking at you, and I don’t know what it means.” Hana speculated, contorting her lips as if in thought.
“It means nothing, Hana. You’re just seeing things.”
“Then why has he been staring at you depressed by the bar for the last half an hour?”
You nearly spit out your drink, “What?”
“Are you clueless or just dumb? He’s been talking to someone for 30 minutes but most of the time he’s been looking at you, and he still is, how haven’t you noticed?”
You creased your eyebrows in surprise as you slowly lowered your shot glass. You turned away from Hana to scan the small crowds of people mingling, eating, drinking in the hall.
You searched the room, drink still in hand until your eyes caught tall, dark and handsome in his finely pressed suit, casually standing with a drink in his hand by a table speaking to someone. You nearly jumped when your eyes locked with Taehyung’s, every cell in your body caught off guard.
What made your heart specifically race was the way he didn’t even look away from you. He held your gaze, casually conversing with the person in front of him, eyeing you until he finally cracked a small smirk before turning back to his companion.
Your eyebrows practically shot up to the sky.
“See, weird or hot? Am I even allowed to say hot?” Hana blurted as she reveled in your reaction. “And you really thought I was joking. You don’t believe anything I say, I could tell you the world’s ending and you wouldn’t believe me. I could tell you aliens finally invaded the planet and you wouldn’t believe me until the green motherfuckers knocked on your door themselves and-”
“Hana, shut the fuck up.” You cut her off abruptly and made a face at her. “Why did you even come here?”
“Grumpy, aren’t we?” She flashed you a sarcastic look before sighing. “Your dad wanted me to find you. You and Taehyung have to meet someone important, so you should stop drinking like an alcoholic, dumbass.” Hana informed hastily as she grabbed the shot glass from you and downed it herself.
“Your dad’s by the entrance, go before he gets mad!” She shooed you away, pushing you up until you whisper-yelled and smacked at her to let you go. 
You began stepping towards the entrance, smoothing over your dress and this was the moment you realized you may have drank a little too much. You were quick to reprimand yourself, cursing your unprofessional behavior as your inner equilibrium became slightly woozy, senses drowning out a bit, every sound hazed over with a buzz in your veins.
You sucked in a breath to pull yourself together, knowing your dad valued this person enough you and Taehyung had to meet them together. 
Taehyung.
You decided to glance in his direction, lips pursing seeing he wasn’t in his previous spot. You chose to ignore it, walking along until you felt a looming presence behind you, almost having time to acknowledge it before a hand suddenly touched the small of your back. 
“Looking for me?”
You nearly squealed, jumping with a hand ready to punish before calming down at the sight of Taehyung, sighing with relief. “Jheez, could you use my name? I thought you were a stranger.” 
“Well, hello to you too.” Taehyung quipped sarcastically. “And why would a stranger touch your back? Of course it’d be the only man in this room marrying you.” Taehyung narrowly eyed you, scrutinizing your reaction with his hand still pressed to you.
“People do a lot of whatever the hell they want, Taehyung.” You responded turning away from him, heels clacking as you continued to pace towards where your father stood. “W-why’d you do that, anyway?” 
Taehyung furrowed his eyebrows. “Because we’re engaged?”
“It’s not real, though.”
“It’s as real as it gets.” Taehyung finalized, making it a statement to smile at everyone you passed, to which you realized just how many pairs of eyes glued themselves to you. “This may not feel like a real marriage to us, but to the rest of the world it is.” 
He then suddenly leaned himself down to your height and lowered his tone, breath just ghosting your ear. “Y/N, we have to make this seem real, it’s the only way we’ll survive.” Taehyung was the closest he’s ever been to you, and the deep baritone of his voice as he called your name did absolutely nothing but manifest butterflies in your chest. 
Why was his voice so deep?
You shook the thought out of your head, ultimately choosing not to say anything because he was in fact, correct. You grinned widely continuing to mask the truth of your arrangements, leaning into him more as you settled for his hand on your back.
You’d noticed it before, but his hand felt particularly large against you now that he was so close. You glanced at his other hand resting by his side, impressed by how masculine they appeared; long fingers with running veins and a roughness to them, sculpted so well you were sure they deserved to be referred to as art. It tickled your giddy side for a second when they seemed to perfectly contrast your more feminine and smaller hands. 
It was kinda cute. 
You neglected your thoughts once you neared your father, warm-heartedly conversing with a well-dressed man you just about recognized. 
“Ah, there you both are!” Your father cheered, reaching out his arm so he could envelop you in a side-hug, returning Taehyung’s bow and addressment.  
“Dad, I heard you wanted us to meet someone?” You perked up in a superficial tone, at least attempting to act as though everything was fine and dandy in your life; maybe owing it to the alcohol to endure all the falsehoods.
“Yes, Y/N-ie, I wanted you to meet Mr. Won. Chang-in, my lovely daughter and whom I guess you already know, her fiancé and CEO of Kim Enterprises, Kim Taehyung.” Your father proudly presented you both.
“Nice to meet you, Mr. Won, Kim Taehyung.” Taehyung was the first to address the man, extending his hand and bowing as he greeted him. You were almost taken aback by how polite he could be, the way his charming smile graced his features and attractively displayed his perfect teeth. His manner of speech and etiquette were all refined with a high degree of professionalism as well, internally gawking at his duality.  
Wasn’t he acting all entitled with you just now? 
“Nice to meet you as well!” You collected yourself and cheered, a little baffled as to why Taehyung still rested his hand against your back. “I’m hoping my father has only said good things.” You earned a laugh from the group, Mr. Won responding by receiving your hand with a firm shake. 
“Ah, Namhyun, you forgot to mention how beautiful your daughter has grown, and your future son-in-law has me jealous! What a handsome and accomplished young man, the perfect match, the two of them.” Mr. Won praised you both kindly.
You and Taehyung both smiled and thanked him humbly, feeling some heat collect in your cheeks upon Mr. Won’s words. You two? The perfect match? Unless he believes a rock and a Greek statue belong together, then he’s absolutely correct. 
Other than that, you chest swarms with butterflies thinking you’re now referred to as ‘two’. 
Taehyung for some odd reason encircles the curve of your waist suddenly, pulling you closer to him. You last minute sputter at the intimate action before leaning into him, one arm nervously encasing his torso as the other rests against his chest. 
You feel him tense underneath you. 
“Aish, you’re such a flatterer. Y/N-ie, do you remember Mr. Won? My friend from university? You haven’t seen him in a while.” Your father rested a hand on your shoulder, trying to jog your memory. 
“Oh, you mean Mr. Won from SNU?” You suddenly remembered, looking to your father for confirmation. 
“Yes, so you do remember!” 
“Of course I do, how could I forget!” You smiled brightly and returned your gaze to the familiar man. “Mr. Won used to sneak me ice cream when you wouldn’t let me have any, Dad.” You scolded him with a playful jab to his arm, inviting more laughter. “I apologize for not recognizing you right away, it’s been a long time, Mr. Won, forgive me.” You solemnly apologized, Mr. Won giving you a look of understanding. 
“Ah, forget it, Y/N. Don’t worry about it, although since it’s been a long time I hope you remember my son? He should be here somewhere..” Mr. Won trailed as his eyes fished over the grand hall, scanning around. 
“Your son..” You repeated to yourself, realizing there was a familiar connection itching at your mind, he was your age actually-
Wait. 
Oh God, not him. 
Anything but him. 
You felt raw panic seep into the spaces between your ribs, your chest filling with a constricting feeling of anxiety you couldn't shake off. Your heart picked up speed and the alcohol coursing through your veins didn’t help your judgement or memory at all, mind fogged over with the poison we dare call alcohol.  
You felt stupid, so utterly stupid. How could you forget Mr. Won and who his Godforsaken son was? 
You felt an anxiety attack riddling you, shifting your weight on your feet as you tried to bite back your uneven breathing. You just couldn’t see this man, especially in a situation where you were standing next to your husband-to-be. 
Taehyung wasn’t so invested in the conversation before him, mindlessly nodding along before he felt you physically freeze next to him, his glance to the side confirming your pale look, watching as your panicked eyes faltered to the floor and revealed... fear? 
He registered your odd shifting and your failed attempts at plastering a smile, confused if you knew this guy and if you did, why were you freaking out so much?
Were you in love with him or something? 
The thought minutely bugged him until he watched you turn straight up uncomfortable, horrified when Mr. Won called out his son’s name. 
“Kiseok-ah! Come here!” 
You stopped breathing when you heard the name, eyes going wide as you avoided eye contact with anyone in the group, but caught Taehyung’s undivided attention. He grew curious when Kiseok sauntered over to the group, your hand on his chest suddenly squeezing his suit as the mysterious man greeted everyone respectfully.
Taehyung watched as his intrigued eyes locked on you, eyebrows perking up amusedly as his lips curved into a smile Taehyung honestly couldn’t admit to liking. 
“Y/N? Wow, long time no see. It’s been what, a year?” The man Kiseok called out happily, like there was absolutely no problem occurring here but as Taehyung felt your hand clutch onto his suit, lips just about quivering before you forced a smile, he knew there was most certainly a problem. 
“Yeah.” Your voice was weak, small, and Taehyung found himself wondering how a courageous person like you was all of a sudden cowering. 
He’d heard it all night, all the accounts of your other life away from the business world. He wasn’t going to lie, he heard a multitude of opinions concerning you, many of which including either looking down on you or telling Taehyung there’s many other, more powerful women in business he could’ve been marrying instead. 
But Taehyung didn’t care for their opinions, he found you the most powerful woman he could ever marry, and agreed to do so because of that very prospect. Sure, you were estranged from the business scene and practically abandoned any role you’d play in your father’s company in order to pursue your own personal aspirations, but if anything, Taehyung found it highly commendable. 
Taehyung knew it took guts to do what you did, a bold and daring act that no other heir or future heir of a wealthy company could ever think of doing, including himself. 
What he found to appreciate most was your unwillingness to give in, where you had to have heard all the back-handed and snobby comments, yet you still held your head up high, remained rooted and adamant in keeping your current way of life. It instantly signaled to him you were courageous, fearless, unable to be stopped in your tracks.
So when he watched you become smaller and smaller the more you stood in the vicinity of this Kiseok, he knew something was sincerely wrong. 
“Ah yes, it’s been quite some time. Why don’t we step away from you three? You could do some catching up.” Your father urged as he motioned Mr. Won to step away with him. You lightly addressed them only to have your hands neglect Taehyung entirely and start fidgeting, attempting to calm your nerves as the alcohol inebriated your system and magnified your anxiety by tenfold. 
“Ah, yes, Kim Taehyung, CEO of Kim Enterprises. I’ve been meaning to meet you.” Kiseok extended his hand as his voice irked you with every syllable, trying your best to seem like absolutely nothing was wrong. 
Taehyung reached out his hand in response uneagerly, giving a small shake while wondering why you let him go. “That’s news to me, nice to meet you.” Taehyung responded, already feeling an intense aura of discomfort and tension between you both, sensing he was missing out on something that seemed 6 ft deep. 
“Likewise. Y/N..” Kiseok suddenly turned towards you, making you wince. You painted on your smile as you lifted your vision. “Kiseok.” 
“How’ve you been?” 
“Better than ever. You?” 
“Marvelous, just wondering what your life’s looked like since I haven’t been in it.”
“I believe I said better than ever, didn’t I?”
Kiseok scoffed unamused, “So a year, huh? In all that time you suddenly found yourself a fiancé, and Kim Taehyung at that?” Kiseok seemed to be making light-hearted conversation to anyone outside of your group, though you knew deep down the hostility behind his words.
“Yeah, I did. It just happened.” You shrugged, gaining the confidence to counter him. “And you? Plan on putting a ring on any of your girls? Maybe the 5th or 7th one you liked?” You sarcastically questioned, furrowing your brows in mock contemplation. 
“No, you know I’ve always had my eye on one girl when it came to marriage.” Kiseok eyed you knowingly, purposefully, like he was trying to make it obvious.
You snorted and glared at him, “If I remember correctly, your attitude said otherwise.” hatred began boiling under your skin. You felt yourself growing angrier by the second, memories between you two coming back in flashes. You didn’t even realize you were shaking until Taehyung’s hand suddenly entangled with yours, pulling you towards him almost defensively. 
You were surprised, looking at your connected hands and back up at Taehyung. He returned your look, peering down at you as he smiled warmly, affectionately. 
“I’m sorry, Kisook? Was it? My future wife and I have plans for tonight. May you excuse us?” Taehyung didn’t even let Kiseok respond before he was pulling you away, in complete shock at his first lack of manners you’d ever seen. You were only left to watch Taehyung as he lead you along, gaining the timely opportunity to realize he was taller than Kiseok, and in fact significantly taller than you. 
Taehyung was a large man in general, you noticed. His shoulders looked broad from behind, accentuated by the fit of his suit which also emphasized the expanse of his chest, tastefully exposing his sculpted neck. His legs were long, proportioned perfectly in accordance with the rest of his model-like figure, which was ideally fit and contained just the right amount of muscle. 
Dear God, you took your time with this one. 
You didn’t even realize Taehyung had pulled you into a secluded hallway or that you were ogling him when he suddenly stopped, turning in your direction and snapping you out of a near fever dream. 
Yeah, alcohol was not a good idea tonight. 
“Who the fuck was that?” 
“What?”
“That douche, who was that?” Taehyung inquired slightly pissed, in need of the asshole’s identity after watching whatever shitshow he didn’t pay for. 
“Nobody, Taehyung, he shouldn’t concern you.” You looked away from him, pouting in a way that made Taehyung momentarily notice the plush of your lips. 
Again?, was all he could think, first, your mother, and now this guy? Just how many people did you have bad connections with and he needed to ignore? 
Why were there so many intricate pieces to you? 
“Are you kidding me? He concerns me now, your mother I can understand but this guy? Nothing to me. I could step on him.” Taehyung proclaimed confidently and stood up broader, conviction written all over his face.
You couldn’t help but giggle at his remark, resembling the thought you had earlier. “I was just thinking, you’re a lot taller than him.” 
Taehyung couldn’t help but bite back a smile, watching you giggle like a shy high schooler and his ears gladly welcomed the soft sound. “Damn straight I am.” He adjusted the jacket of his suit suavely. It was then he remembered what his other hand was doing; still holding yours. 
His eyes suddenly gleamed with mischief. 
He squeezed your hand a little tighter and yanked you towards him, bodies just centimeters apart as you crashed into him, all up in each other’s personal space.
Your eyes widened in complete surprise. 
 “So you were thinking about me, huh?” Taehyung teased with a stupidly lowered tone, a smug grin decorating his face. 
You ignored the electricity shooting through you, rolling your eyes and playfully sneering at him. “Shut up, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see you’re taller.” You forced space between you two and tried snatching your hand from him, but his grip transformed into an iron lock. 
“Says the one who was thinking about me.” 
“Taehyung, shut-” You almost huffed out but as soon as you stepped away, your copious consumption of alcohol suddenly attacked you all at once, vertigo making you lose your balance until Taehyung reached out to steady you. 
“Jheez, did you have to drink tonight?” Taehyung chastised you as you fell into him, head spinning with disorientation and growing flimsier by the second. “You’re probably a lightweight at your size.”
“I am not a lightweight. You don’t even know how much I drank, it was a lot.” You bit back in rebuttal, hooking onto his taut forearms as he supported you. 
“But I did see.” He voiced barely above a whisper, causing you to snap your vision up at him incredulously. “What?” 
“Nothing, it shouldn’t concern you.” Taehyung mocked, though still tried to fix you onto your own footing.  
You didn’t even get to scrutinize him further when you felt another round of dizziness plague you, balance faltering again. Taehyung huffed out and finally flanked you on his side, arm encasing your shoulders as he adjusted you. “Okay Miss I’m-Not-A-Lightweight, you should eat something.” He fit you beside him, beginning to walk you towards the main hall. 
Taehyung in this moment didn’t understand what he was doing, utterly clueless as to what was fueling his actions. He was uncertain why he found himself.. caring? He didn’t even know you, yet he couldn’t help but become a little concerned when he watched you down drinks like it was New Year’s Eve. 
How can all that alcohol fit into one tiny person?
What was he even thinking when he dragged you away from that Kisuk guy? Why did he feel like protecting you all of a sudden? A near sense of possessiveness? He wasn’t even your real husband. 
It started giving Taehyung a headache. This was all strange, a foreign concept he wasn’t familiar with and he didn’t know if it was the result of his considerate personality or only manifested solely because of you.
The same way Taehyung dealt with his inner turmoil, you dealt with yours; you were always so adamant on independence though ironically found yourself leaning on Taehyung.
Oddly, you let him carefully guide you back into the hall with no protests. 
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It was the day of the wedding. 
You wish you could recall your emotions throughout the day, certain there would be at least a sliver of a positive one. Though as you remained unmoving, nearly catatonic, unresponsive to your surroundings, you knew there wouldn’t be a single happy memory in the tsunami of sorrow that attacked you today. 
Emotions of grief plagued consistently as you realized the loss of everything you valued most in your life. Your happiness, your freedom, your ability to choose. The stripping of all those bundled into an stifling wad in your chest that left you in a perpetual state of wanting to cry.
The sting in your heart when you realized your mother didn’t bother to come, the excruciating smile you forced onto your features when Taehyung’s mother delicately placed the veil atop your head, the secret tears you shed after adorning your body with a wedding dress you didn’t even choose; it all left you internalizing feelings of utter agony. 
And none of it was your real choice. 
Even the flowers at the wedding weren’t your favourite. 
This day was horrifying. You couldn’t believe you prided yourself on your independence, refusing to give in despite numerous challenges and never taking a word of what anyone said to you. Even when someone begged you to change or come back to your old life, you always chose for yourself. You never allowed someone to push you around, seldom coerced into anything solely based on the wishes of another. 
Yet here you were, standing just before the grand doors of a wedding you never asked for, having easily followed every word of your father’s and sacrificed your deepest principles in order to make him happy, to appease and live up to his expectations that weren’t your own. 
It was utterly frightening, appalling. As if you had lost the one true commendable feature of the intricate character you were, suddenly lost the acclamation of others even if they didn’t know the true nature of your marriage. 
But what disgusted you the most was truly, that you had lost respect for yourself. 
These grim thoughts were the ones that attached themselves to you as you hesitantly hooked your arm with your father’s. You used every ounce of strength to not flee, to remain here, to still walk down that isle with your head held high like you always have despite abandoning every foundation of the character you’d spent years working on.  
You didn’t care that your eyes watered, masking them with the facade of happy tears from the blushing bride. You didn’t care when your father looked incredibly concerned and wondered what was so wrong, you didn’t care how sorrowful you may have appeared to anyone at this ironically glamorous event. 
Though what you did care for was that you couldn’t hold your head up as you walked down the isle, vision fixated on the ground as your tears betrayed you, spilling out at the traumatizing feeling of not being able to stand tall like you always did, something stripping you of your self-reassurance, your strength, your confidence.  
It all spelled the requiem of your soul as you reached the end, dwelling in the impossibility this was happening to you until you felt the touch of Taehyung’s fingertips, guiding you up the stairs. It was then confirmed to you this was in fact real, part of your new reality you had no choice but to accept. 
You suddenly felt eternal gratitude for the veil that now covered your face, hiding the tears you cried at mourning the loss of everything you worked for.
While the priest’s words were read, you didn’t exchange a single look with Taehyung, knowing you’d only want to evaporate into the air, to run away at light speed or have someone in a turn-of-events suddenly take your life, just so you didn't have to face the humility of giving up the life you’d spent blood, sweat and tears building if you looked him in the eye. 
You felt the weight of your unknown future crushing you, pushing you towards the precipice as you gripped Taehyung’s hands harder to ground yourself. 
You were to rely on Taehyung, to share a bond with him you had never spent time cultivating, expected to live a life next to him while never being able to truly understand him, know him, love him. The natural process of falling in love now tainted with the coercion of a pressurized marriage, losing the opportunity to achieve any true sense of love. You’d never experience finding the one anymore, your soulmate, the other end of your red string of fate. 
That realization made your tears spill harder, disconnecting your hand from Taehyung’s to prevent your choked sobs becoming audible, holding your palm against your quivering lips. 
To anyone beyond you and Taehyung, it would look as though you were crying tears of happiness, joyously weeping at your matrimony with the love of your life, though as Taehyung felt the shaking of your hands, your refusal to meet his gaze as you reluctantly walked down the isle, the agonizing pain he could see through the sheer of your veil, he knew you were far from happy. 
He couldn’t help but purse his lips together tightly, knowing you were probably swallowing insurmountable torment down your throat because of this marriage, and tears pricked at his own eyes finding himself able to relate. 
He wasn’t just upset for you or himself, it was the entire situation, quite frankly the fucking world. The fact that the universe planned this as your destiny, his destiny, that the happiness of your parents and two companies came at the expense of both yours and his.
He knew you didn’t hate him, that he wasn’t the reason just as much as you weren’t the reason either, it was the arbitrary nature of the arrangement. That whatever version of true love and happily ever after you and Taehyung had separately dreamed of, it could never come to life. 
Even if the company meant everything to Taehyung, his CEO position more important than whatever position he’d play as some husband, seldom having time to consider love and relationships, he still harboured the same wants and desires any human would. A partner, a companion he truly loved with whom he’d start a family eventually, create a life for them and himself defined by love and comfort.
Though Taehyung only knew now you would both die with your decision-making capabilities robbed of you, bound to each other forcibly without the ardor of real love. 
Taehyung’s every thought was proven correct when the two of you exchanged your vows in near strangled chokes and shaky tones, appearing as happy emotions to the guests of the wedding though only you two knowledgeable of each other’s suffering. 
Your vision finally met Taehyung’s once you heard the rawness in his voice, your miserable emotions doubling when you registered he was just in the same pain as you. It was in that moment the priest’s words became audible and rang loud in both your ears, suddenly grounding you two to earth and reminding you of your reality. 
“You may kiss the bride.”
Both of your eyes grievously locked for a moment of horrified realization; that you were seconds away from going through with this, throwing each other’s lives away for the utilitarian benefit, abandoning any sense of choice in whom you both would spend a lifetime with.
Taehyung swallowed thickly as he removed your veil, feeling his eyes fill with tears again when he laid them upon your utterly devastated, tear-stained face. You were using every nerve in your body to stop yourself from sobbing and caving into the ominous thought of fleeing the ceremony.  
Taehyung’s sight wondered to your lips as they still quivered, nearly swollen red at the intensity in which you bit them, awaiting the kiss you were certain would be filled with frustration and hatred, hatred for the mud you were dragging him through, hatred for pressuring him into suddenly valuing something more than his work and his company, to suddenly become a husband to you. 
Though as he watched the terror flashing through your eyes, tears watering your lash line, he knew he could never feel anything so ardently negative towards you, remembering exactly what he was stripping you of. 
The life you built on your own, defying any and everyone’s expectations of yourself, cursing your heir status to hell, your strength, your independence. Now? Your life was bound to his, bound to one where you were obliged to sacrifice yourself for your father’s company and the upper class cesspool you’d spent so long trying to run away from. 
So as Taehyung began closing the gap between you two, nearing your shaking figure, he resolved he wouldn’t make this hard. He would try, try to accept that his life now entailed you, would try to work towards the balance his father insisted he needed, try to understand that you were now part of his priorities and could never simply ignore you.  
He glided his thumbs against the back of your hands that held his pacifyingly, leaning down until he was just inches from your lips as you squeezed your eyes shut. He unexpectedly spoke quietly, meaningfully, seconds away from sealing the deal of an uncertain future, though, remained certain of this one thing. 
“I’ll take care of you, Y/N, I promise.” And he kissed you in a single breath, no haste, no pressure, only the gentle touch of his lips as they met yours, soft and light. 
Maybe Taehyung didn’t know the exact feelings behind his promise, but he knew the meaning; that no matter the arrangement, the non-existent feelings, the loss of choice, he would at least take care of you like any husband would, a good husband.  
He at least owed you that.  
You were left shocked at the nature of his kiss, Taehyung’s warm lips connecting with yours tenderly. You were convinced the tears you saw in his eyes were enough to assert he hated this, frustrated he had to sell his soul, wishing to only rush the kiss so he could call it a day and ignore you for the rest of his life. 
Though what you never expected was the promise he made, or the way he kissed you with such intimacy you found yourself melting into his touch, reciprocating. He kissed you like you were fragile, locking your lips in a way that solidified his promise, as if out of all the empty vows you spoke today, this was the one, true vow he would keep. His lips felt plush against yours, catching his mouth just a little more before the bittersweet disconnection. 
You and Taehyung exchanged a poignant look, small smiles decorating both your faces with a mutual understanding swimming in your eyes as you gripped each other’s hands. You let his promise permeate the air between you two, finding solace in his words as the applause of everyone attending the ceremony filled the hall.   
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Maybe it was the warm way Taehyung always pressed his hand to the small of your back when you spoke to others the whole night, maybe the way he veered you away from excessive amounts of alcohol with a light-hearted scolding considering that last time you drank, or maybe even the way he gently held you during your first dance..
Maybe it was all these considerate, kinds act that made you view Taehyung in a less negative light and rather a favourable one, that maybe he wouldn’t be the asshole CEO you’d first accused him of being.  
You would also be an idiot to not mention how completely and utterly handsome he was, looks carved by the Greeks themselves, quite possibly the hottest, most attractive man you’ve ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on. 
And maybe all that accumulated into your assured opinion that when it came to consummating your marriage with Taehyung, you’d have no qualms or worries whatsoever. You would be absolutely willing, ready to take the night on and maybe even have some fun for yourself with whom you could tell was a really, really nice guy.
Though as Taehyung walked calmly in front of you towards your hotel suite, reaching into his suit pocket for the card key he’d retrieved at the front desk to swipe against the lock, your chest clogged with a crushing feeling of anxiety you couldn’t subdue. 
These weren’t the same nerves of maybe being not pretty enough, body insecurities or fear of what to expect from Taehyung, no, these nerves came from the utter panic of having to experience sex with another man.
Especially since your last partner. 
It always started with your permission, that wasn’t the issue, Though what left you afraid, so utterly frightened with the thought of spending a night with a man like this came from the treatment you received from that partner. 
Safe to say, you weren’t treated kindly. Far from that, actually, you were treated as though you had no needs or were a means of simple use. Your last partner was the opposite of giving, he was selfish, self-absorbed and only concerned himself with his own pleasure, going on and on only until he was satisfied and neglected you in every sense of the word, sometimes even refusing to listen to you if you protested. 
To make matters worse, he wasn’t faithful. 
You knew he slept around, a lot, it was the number one reason you never agreed to actually date him, never make things official. 
But the reason you would end up sleeping with him was because of the most perfectly imperfect concept among the human race; love. You believed every time with him was a new chance to make that love real, that it was the genuine manifestation of your feelings for one another, thinking maybe he wasn’t the asshole he always portrayed himself as and could man up enough to love you unconditionally. 
And he completely reeled you in, made you fall in love too quickly and made you believe he was capable of love. This grew exponentially when you were often described as ‘the different one’, the one he always came back to, that you were special. You clung onto those words as much as you could, convinced each time you were in fact the one for him, that maybe one day, he’d wake up and abandon his fuckboy lifestyle and mature.
But everyday that went by, every promise that was never fulfilled, every word that wasn’t met with an action, and especially after every hook up that resulted in nothing new, you began to understand you were everyone’s favourite role in a Shakespearean play. 
The fool. 
You were a joke to believe anything he said, the most naive person on earth to think you were any different from the others, when every night simply ended in rough fucks, virtually no orgasm and miniscule aftercare.
It left you essentially scarred, traumatized that every man in the world was built like this. It didn’t help that whenever you look back, many of your ex partners were of the same cut, the same trope of assholes that don’t seem as bad but end up being exactly so. 
It was what made you swallow thickly as Taehyung opened the door to the suite, holding it open as he moved aside to let you enter first. You walked forward and unintentionally brushed against him, realizing how much smaller you were in comparison to him all over again. 
He towered over you, and it made you more nervous. 
You looked up at him momentarily and quietly thanked him as you stepped inside, setting your sights on the large, king sized bed situated on one side of the room, a lounging area with couches to the other side which lead to a bathroom. Seoul’s breathtaking skyline was visible in the dark of the night through wall-to-ceiling windows opposite to you, covered by flowy, sheer curtains. 
You took a deep breath, trying to remind yourself Taehyung was not the same. Not all men are the same, you can’t inflict the mistakes and wrongdoings of one man onto another, categorize them into one kind. You wanted to think this way, and you knew it was the humane way to think. 
But as the memories of those heart-aching nights filled your head, the empty words, the lack of care or concern, the neglect, the feelings of pure abandonment and use only caused your heart to beat profusely in your chest, clutching onto the neckline of your dress to breathe. 
What if Taehyung really was no different?
It then suddenly hit you you didn’t know him. All you knew of Taehyung was that he was a fiercely successful business man, sitting atop Seoul’s most prestigious with Godly looks and a stare that could kill a man. You remembered your initial feelings about him; his stare in fact intimidated you, quite frankly all of him intimidated you, he was the epitome of perfection and you were far from that very notion. It left you thinking you didn’t measure up, and that he could view you in a dissimilar light than you viewed him; an unfavorable one. 
He could simply not want you, but is forced to.  
You’d observed his kind behavior and actions over the odd two days you met him, though that was exactly the inculpatory factor; you had only met him twice. You didn’t know what he would be like alone, when it was just the two of you, when there weren’t eyes scrutinizing him and cameras snapping shots of his every move. 
You didn’t know how he would be like in the bedroom, either. 
Your mind raced as you conflicted with yourself, trying to understand that Taehyung could be different, though apprehensive with the miniscule knowledge you actually had of him. 
You discerned after that last asshole of a partner you needed the love and care of a real partner, someone who would tend to your needs, adore you in the midst of their actions, be a giver and not just a receiver.  
And you didn’t know if Taehyung would be that partner. 
“Y/N...” Taehyung called out to you rather softly as he removed his suit jacket, the rustling of the cloth signaling he had indeed done so. His footsteps were hard to miss, the soles of his shoes sounding against the hardwood floor as he neared your lonesome figure standing in the middle of the room. 
Your breathing quickened with nearly every step he took, attempting to resolve the civil war you were battling within. You were trying to convince yourself Taehyung would be a nice man, a nice husband; though couldn’t help but feel deflated by the fact it was all mainly coerced out of him.
Your thoughts overwhelmed you as Taehyung finally stood behind you, mere inches from your back as he watched you from behind, unbeknownst of any feelings or thoughts currently riddling you.
He hesitated, though gently placed his hand against your bare arm, the sudden warmth of his hand against your skin causing you to flinch. He peered down at your smaller self squarely focusing in front of you, anticipating your response. He grew slightly soft when you tentatively looked over your shoulders, clearly teary-eyed. 
Taehyung couldn’t miss how scared you seemed, and he his heart inexplicably stung at the thought you were afraid of him. 
“We don’t have to do this.” Taehyung’s voice was low and resembled warm honey, reverberating in a way that made you ease up. 
You worked towards a stable voice. “W-we don’t?” 
“No, we don’t” His voice held no disappointment, only the intention of seemingly wanting to assure you, firm and oddly comforting. 
“I’m sorry, Taehyung. I’m really sorry.” It was hard to keep your tone leveled, clutching your hand over your mouth as you swallowed your emotions. 
“Don’t be sorry, there’s nothing for you to apologize for.” 
You strangely felt the desire to hold his hand that rested against you, though you ignored the urge and simply stepped out of his touch, clutching your chest tightly in an effort to cower away from him. But it was here you suddenly remembered that he kissed you, and the way he did so. 
It made your cheeks fill with a rosy blush. 
“Do you mean that?” You’d finally turned to meet his eyes, his face only visible by the moonlight illuminating the room. He seemed to have retracted his hand and stood with both tucked in his pockets, relaxed. 
This became the first time you noticed just how ravishing he looked tonight. 
His dark hair was slicked back loosely and left enough pieces to fall as a comma, graciously exposing his forehead, his Tom Ford suit attractively hugged his model-like body, watch and accessories accentuating his expensive look. 
His features were casted over by soft lighting, somehow adding to his beauty as the glow made him appear... less intimidating, dare you say warm or inviting. 
His expression was funnily enough, one that you could actually read. He held no contempt, no impatience or anger, only a hint of consideration as his calm eyes looked at you. His face may have been predominantly blank, void of a smile, though certainty held a form of reassurance.  
“Of course I do, why would I do anything with an unwilling person?”
You scoffed lightly, “Not a lot of people would say that.” Your eyes faltered from Taehyung’s and clutched yourself tighter, expression completely telling of trauma.
Taehyung instantly picked up on it, eyebrows slightly furrowing at your words though softening once registering their weight. He felt an overwhelming sense of apology take him, thinking of his next sentence before his mind oddly flashed back to the night of the engagement party.
“Y/N, did Kiseok..?” Taehyung trailed hesitantly. 
You winced at his line of thinking, “No, no...not what you’re thinking,” you immediately denied. “Just, shitty experiences.”
“Shitty, as in...?”
“As in only seeking self-satisfaction, neglect, lies, infidelity. Can we go to sleep?” You deflected with a heavy sigh and a hand at your temple, the day’s events catching up to you.
Taehyung nodded in agreement, “Yeah, sleep. We both need that.” His eyes then landed on the bed, registering even if it were large enough you two could sleep apart, he still opted for caution. 
“Um.. you can take the bed, by the way. I’ll sleep on the couch-”
“No, don’t do that.” You replied quickly. “I can’t sleep on a king-sized bed all by myself, it’s huge.” You side-eyed the massive mattress and laughed a little, lightening the heavy aura casted over the room. 
“Are you sure? I don’t want you to be uncomf-”
“Don’t worry, Taehyung. You don’t make me feel uncomfortable.” You smiled at him lightly and received a small one from him, both your eyes mirroring the same sense of understanding you exchanged at the altar. 
“I’ll let you wash up first, your overnight bag should be in the bathroom closet.” Taehyung informed, pointing towards the direction of your things. 
“Thank you.” You voiced with an amount of warmth that made Taehyung want to genuinely smile, though crushed the weird urge and nodded agreeably instead.
You began walking away from him until a nuisance suddenly occurred to you, cursing yourself as you came to a full stop. “Um, Taehyung.. I forgot but could you..?” You angled your back towards him to call out to the ribbons tying the back of your dress, knowing you would’ve taken 20 years just to untie your bodice yourself. 
The fact that you weren’t looking directly at Taehyung made him feel relieved, glad he wouldn’t embarrass himself with the his eyes slightly widened. He was quick to reprimand himself, it’s just a woman’s dress, why the hell are you shocked? 
Taehyung swallowed dryly before replying, “Uh, yeah I’ll--I’ll do that.” He walked towards you sparingly and positioned himself behind you.
He’d noticed it before, but you were relatively small compared to him in size and it continued to poke at his brain, maybe even momentarily think it was cute. 
Cute? When have I ever found a girl cute?
Taehyung exhaled before his hands carefully made for the silk ribbons, his tentative fingers fiddling with the ties until he eventually began loosening each one. He started unlooping your bodice, breathing out considerably when each loop began exposing your back inch by inch.  
Taehyung’s sweet, hot breath fanned your skin, tensing each time as your every nerve went haywire feeling just how close he was. His slender fingers brushed against your bare skin here and there, making heat collect in your face.
You grew even hotter when your kiss with him suddenly crept back into your mind, unknowing of the reason why excitement and electricity shot throughout your body because of it. The way his soft, full lips met yours, mouthed at you tastefully repeated in your head, making you extremely nervous at how much a measly kiss from him was occupying your mind; it was just a kiss. 
Taehyung found himself tensing by the intimacy of the moment, remembering the way he so boldly kissed you. He found that he liked the plush of your lips, the way he had to bend down to your smaller height to lock lips; and it made him feel strange. 
How the hell was he taking interest in something other than his work? No, this isn’t interest, Taehyung thought, and would spend however long denying it. 
He’d finished the task throughout all his thinking, unrealizing of how proximal he was to you. He oddly hated that the moment was over, coming back down to Earth.
“There you go.” He cleared his voice and stepped away from you. 
You held your bodice up against your chest, realizing Taehyung had a full-access view of your back and you grew 10x hotter. You gulped at the thought before hastily turning around to thank him, quickly disappearing into the bathroom for a moment of reprieve. 
You shut the door and instantly breathed out a breath you didn’t remember holding, looking at your hot mess of a face in the mirror trying to cool down, reliving the last 10 minutes of what just happened. 
You took a deep breath. 
Maybe Taehyung is different after all. 
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theheroheart · 3 years
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New Years Meme 2020
@arqueete:  “This survey is a meme that has been passed around among my friends since back in LJ days. If you want to join in, please consider yourself tagged.”
I used to journal more, and stuff like this is really nice to look back on, because I have terrible memory for life stuff or the passage of time. So here, for future me.
1. What did you do in 2020 that you’d never done before? Uhhhh wear a mask to the grocery store? This was not a groundbreaking year for new experiences.
2. Did you keep your New Years’ resolutions and will you make more for next year? I didn't have any. I don't make any. I mean, sometimes I make them in the vague "I want to focus on this in the future", but I'll already have forgotten by March, like I don't really PLAN my life in such a way. I just have goals that aren't tied to specific points in time. You get there when you get there, and you choose what you want to prioritise.
3. Did anyone close to you give birth? No, but my brother got married, which was very exciting because he's 40 and has never had a girlfriend who he considered important enough for me to meet. (And my sister-in-law is delightful.)
4. Did anyone close to you die? My (half-)brother's dad died a few weeks ago (cancer), but I didn't really know him, so I wouldn't say he was close to me. I did spend almost a week at my brother's place to be there for him though. And honestly, I kept thinking about how my mom's dead this year, because in a way I'm glad we didn't have to deal with this year together. She already died from respitory failure, had poor impulse control and sense of safety, and I would've been CONSTANTLY worried about her.
5. What countries did you visit? I was gonna go to Malaysia (for my brother's wedding celebration), but that didn't happen. (Flatmates were gonna go to Japan.) So. Yeah. Home country all the way.
6. What would you like to have in 2021 that you lacked in 2020? A driving force to move forward in my life?
7. What date from 2020 will remain etched upon your memory, and why? I don't think... that there is one specific day? I guess the US election? Despite me being Norwegian, it's still fairly historic.
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year? /stares blankly at the wall I did do some nice art pieces? I coped? I managed to have good times and make friends despite everything else.
9. What was your biggest failure? I dropped out of two classes specifically because I couldn't do remote learning and self-structured study (BECAUSE ADHD YO), even though it wasn't even that HARD subjects, which was very frustrating. It hasn't set my study plan back, thankfully, but it still felt like a waste.
10. Did you suffer illness or injury? Only mental. And thankfully not as bad as it could've been, but hell yeah there was some strong anxiety in there.
11. What was the best thing you bought? I've bought some great video games this year. Animal Crossing brought 250 hours of fun, Hades brought 100 hours so far. Good investments.
12. Whose behavior merited celebration? // 13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed? Both of these are related to pandemic behavior so I think you can guess.
14. Where did most of your money go? Entertainment? Also, god, I spent so much money on theatre tickets that are now just vouchers for non-specific future performances. I'll get my money's worth eventually, but right now it's hundres of dollars worth just sitting in vouchers. OH, and, digital D&D books.
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about? I had tickets for Chess. Several tickets, for multiple performances. STILL HAVEN'T SEEN THIS PRODUCTION THOUGH. But they're still doing it so hopefully it will still happen.
16. What song(s) will always remind you of 2020? Not sure I have any specific ones, actually. No iconic music.
17. Compared to this time last year, are you: Last year I was feeling very accomplished. I was challenging myself, had befriended lots of classmates, had gotten through some stuff I was quite proud of managing. This year has been... not that. But on the other hand, I'm not as exhausted from school stuff, and I'm ready to actually go places and try to do things, as opposed to just wanting a month long nap.
18. What do you wish you’d done more of? General life maintainance stuff. Not just school work, but like, focus more on money sensibility and try to get on disability, go to the dentist, work with my doctor more... All of that got a little bit just... postponed indefinitely.
19. What do you wish you’d done less of? Uh, can't think of any notable negative behaviour. It's mostly stuff I didn't do. Like, I had some bad anxiety in the spring, but honestly I think I did an appropriate amount of worrying.
20. How will you be spending Christmas? Had my first christmas with my flatmates (whom I love very much), and had my dad over as well. It was very lovely, and socially way less draining than usual.
22. Did you fall in love in 2020? lmao I'm aromantic
23. How many one-night stands? lmao I'm asexual
24. What was your favorite TV program? There were a few this year! Good Omens, The Queen's Gambit, Julie and the Phantoms, Avenue 5. There were more I watched and enjoyed, but I think those stand out the most. Also, does Critical Role count? OH, The Baby Sitters Club! A lot of good stuff.
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year? Nah. I don't hate a lot of people.
26. What was the best book you read? Don't think I read anything notable this year. Don't read a lot of books, I prefer to consume stories in other media.
27. What was your greatest musical discovery? Julie and the Phantoms. Not because the music is astounding or anything, but it was very feel-good and fun. Don't think I had a lot of new music.
28. What did you want and get? D&D campaigns? Have gotten really invested in one of them in particular, it's delightful.
29. What was your favorite film of this year? Hmmm. The only one that stands out was The Old Guard. I watch more series than films. 2 hours isn't long enough for me to get properly invested AND satisfied.
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you? I turned 33 and I don't know that I did anything special. I think I just chilled? Flatmates made me a nice breakfast!
32. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying? Having the energy for essays/exams, probably. Just feeling like I actually had some accomplishments. OR LIKE. If Norway did like New Zealand and just wiped the virus out.
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2020? Pyjamas. Occasionally 'apocalypse chic'.
34. What kept you sane? My flatmates and my dad. Reliable social interaction with people I care about.
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most? Matthew McNulty, which applies to every single year. But this year I started both a gallery website and a discord server for him, so it was a particularly good year for him.  (Special mention to Paul Spera, who I finally talked to face-to-face, through Zoom, but still.) Also I'm using 'fancy' platonically.
36. What political issue stirred you the most? Ha aha hah all of them, oh god. BLM, probably, though. That was when I still had the energy to get invested.
37. Who did you miss? So many people. Like, come on. I don't know that it was even specific people so much just... being in a group? Like, my choir gang?
38. Who was the best new person you met? Met a guy I ended up playing a LOT of board games with. We haven't really talked in a few months now tho. And there's a friend I didn't MEET this year, but I really connected with, who's also now my DM, which was really nice.
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2020: It's not necessarily new knowledge, but this year has really driven home the need for both community solidarity and governmental support/leadership.
40. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year: I'm alone in my apartment, that means I can do anything / I'm not wearing pants (alone in my apartment - Brian David Gilbert)
Summary: It's been a conflicted year, a lot has felt like it's been on stand-still, but there's still been some good things in there.
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Hello !! I’m a high school student interested in classics. I know a little bit from english classes and I’d love to learn more, but I have no idea where to start. I was wondering if you have any advice on how to start learning about classics, what to research, what book to read, where to start, etc. Thank you
Hello, there, Nonny! There is a lot of material, so I understand it can be overwhelming. I have a couple of other asks that you might find useful, so I’ll link them for you because it might give you a little bit of guidance:
Advice for Aspiring Classicist Ask: https://theancientgeekoroman.tumblr.com/post/179847323830/hi-im-a-high-schooler-who-wants-to-pursue-aSuggested Reading List Ask: https://theancientgeekoroman.tumblr.com/post/179972282550/hey-sorry-to-bother-you-but-i-recently-went-to-a
One of the things that might help you with where to start is making a list of why you’re interested in the Classics. Do you like the languages? If that’s it, which language is what interests you the most? You can find a lot of different things that can help you to get started there. Is the culture what interests you most? What part of the culture? For me, it’s the religion and architecture of the ancient world, with very specific interests. But remember, I started my undergraduate career in 2007 and the introduction to everything was broad. My particular research interests and ideas have had over a decade to develop. Start broadly and then try to narrow it down. 
For example, if you’re more interested in Ancient Greece, find a comprehensive book of the history of Ancient Greece. These might be good places to start:
Ancient Greece: From Prehistoric to Hellenistic Times by Thomas R. Martin
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0300160054/
Ancient Greece: A Political, Social, and Cultural History by Sarah B. Pomeroy et. al
https://www.amazon.com/Ancient-Greece-Political-Cultural-History/dp/0199846049
Similar books might be helpful, or reading historiographers such as Herodotus might be another way to get into it, but I find his materials challenging to get into as a beginning scholar. 
From there, try and see what continues to interest you about the history you’ve read; did the military history interest you? Then you move to books that focus on that, and you might find out you’re interested in a specific war. And you continue to do that until you narrow down your interests to specific things that might be a bit more difficult to find material for. 
For example, my interest started with Greek mythology as a child. As I got older, I got more interested, and I began reading history books. The idea of religion being so interconnected with politics and other daily life began to intrigue me. Eventually, my interests moved to the relationship between the religion of the ancient Greeks and how it related to sex and gender in the ancient world. Figuring out how to tackle this is similar to how you would tackle a research topic: start general and narrow it down from there until you find a niche that you want to learn everything about. 
If you’re not sure precisely where to start, I would suggest reading through this book: The History of the Ancient World: From the Earliest Accounts to the Fall of Rome by Susan Wise Bauer (https://www.amazon.com/History-Ancient-World-Earliest-Accounts/dp/039305974X/). This book doesn’t focus just on Europe, either, but on other areas as well. You might be surprised at what interests you!
Additionally, explore related fields to Classics, like Near Eastern Studies, because you might be interested in those fields as well. The people who often interacted with the Ancient Greek and/or Roman people are often overlooked or kind of peripheral for Classics students (at least it was the case for my experience in my coursework). For example, I knew nothing about the Thracians until I went to an archaeological field school in Bulgaria and the place where we dug was a Thracian trading post. Had I heard of them before? Yes. Did I learn extensively about them in any of my courses or hear them mentioned more than in passing? No. But I want to learn more! So, don’t be afraid to expand on your exploration beyond just the Ancient Greek and Roman people. 
So, start extremely broad, then narrow down as things pique your interest. Classics has so much to it that you can pretty much pursue anything under it - history, politics, law, religion, architecture, art, war, etc. are all general things under “Classics” but before you know it, you might be interested in the way Roman rulers are depicted on coins during a specific century and whether this is considered a form of art or the mythological representation of Ancient Greece in early historiography. 
Explore everything! Look up recent scholarship and see what current Classics scholars are writing about! You’d be surprised at how many things relate to Classics and the connections that are made between Classics and several other areas. (Usually, universities will have lists of what their current students are working on and recently completed dissertations, but Academia.edu, Google Scholar, and JSTOR will have some useful information). 
I hope this gave you a little more direction (be sure to check that other ask with the reading list, too), and please let me know if I need to clarify anything!
All the best,
Tychon, the Ancient Geeko-Roman
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owlish-peacock36 · 6 years
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Time Stays; We Go On: Ficlet
So, the consensus was that you guys wanted it tonight, so here it is! Enjoy!!
FF Master List (That hasn’t been updated in months. Oops!)
The decorations were painful to the eyes. Lime green was a garish color to begin with, but when strewn around the gym in every corner? Absolutely vomitous.
Jamie wasn’t sure who approved such an awful color for their 15 year class reunion, but he knew he’d never forgive them.
15 years? God, was he already 33? That didn’t feel right. He wasn’t married. Didn’t have children. Hell, some months it was difficult to pay rent on time. But, the years didn’t lie.
He wasn’t an old my by any means, not yet. But, the days came and went faster than they used to, and he knew one day he’d blink and be 70. Christ, he was halfway to 70 now!
“Yer brooding.” Jamie’s sister, Jenny, sidled up beside him, navigating treacherous terrain with her large pregnant belly. Although the two were born five minutes apart, their appearances begged to differ. Where Jenny was small and dark, Jamie was large and fair. The only characteristics they had in common were their blue eyes and wide mouths.
Their personalities, however, were a different story altogether. They were too similar, both stubborn and determined. They fought often, but made up even more.Thick as thieves. A cliche, but the truth often was.
“I’m no brooding.”
“Aye, ye are. Ye’ve got yer brows all drawn together, and yer mouth all puckered.” Jenny imitated ‘the look’ surprisingly well, but Jamie was not impressed.
“Ye look like yer in pain.”
“Isn’t brooding emotional pain?” Her face was still stuck in ‘brooding’ mode.
“Yer face will get stuck like that, and I’ll no be the one to explain it to Ian.”
“Explain what to me?” As if he were the devil summoned by his name, Ian appeared at Jenny’s other side. Married for eight years, they were the definition of ‘opposites attract.’
“Jamie’s brooding.”
“I’m not. I’m just��� thinking. It’s been 15 years since we graduated. We’re getting old.”
Ian looked positively offended. “Dinna put me in an early grave! I’m still a spring chick!”
“It’s strange though. I mean, I dinna recognize anyone here.”
“Really? Everyone looks the same to me. For instance…” A sly smile grew on Jenny’s face. “Is that no yer ex-girlfriend?”
Jamie followed Jenny’s gaze to a small blonde leaning against the punch table. Laoghaire MacKenzie--though, it probably wasn’t MacKenzie anymore--was a pretty girl at 16, and not much had changed in the years that followed, it seemed. But, Jamie was aware of the new, tight lines around her mouth that showed unhappiness, even when smiling.
“Aye, it is.”
“Why do ye no go talk to her?”
“Because, we dated for six months, and she gave me a black eye when I broke it off with her. I’ll no be going down that road again…”
Jenny sighed. “Perhaps thats for the best. She looks a right bitch nowadays.” Jenny was never one to mince words.
The heavy beat of an early 2000s dance tune shook the floor, and struck Jamie right in his nostalgic heart.
“Come, my dear. Let us dance!” Ian held his arm out formally for Jenny to take, but she was hesitant.
“Ian. Ye canna dance.”
“O’ course I can!” Without another word, he swept Jenny into the  midst of the twirling bodies in the dance floor. Using this time to take a break from socializing, Jamie wandered over to an empty seat next to an unfamiliar brunette.
“Is this seat taken?”
Her eyes widened at his sudden presence, but she shook her head and motioned for him to sit. “No, it’s all yours.”
Jamie watched his sister spin gracefully around the rhythm-less Ian. Jenny was right; he really couldn’t dance. He couldn’t help but smile, though. Those two were still so much in love, even after ten years and two children. Happiness radiated, and they glowed.
Jamie turned his attention back to the woman next to him. She was quietly nursing her spiked punch, staring out at the dance floor with a smirk on her lips.
“Hello.” She turned, surprised at the sudden conversation. “I’m Jamie. Fraser.” He held out his hand for her to shake.
She took it immediately, her hand cool and damp from her cup’s condensation. “I remember. I’m Claire Beauchamp.”
He remembered, as well.
He was pretty sure he never spoke more than ten words to her in all their schooling, but he had seen her many times. She was quiet and bookish, her dark curls always falling over her face when she read, like a ‘do not disturb’ sign. But, she was whip smart—salutatorian, if he remembered correctly—and intimidating as hell. Her gaze was calculating; the gears in her head were in constant motion. There were rumors that she only dated older men, and Jamie was inclined to believe them at the time. He would admire her from afar, the rumors keeping him at a safe distance.
He glanced at her hands, as was the habit of 30-something bachelors around attractive women. Her fingers were bare.
She was single, then.
“Weel, it’s a pleasure to meet ye, again.”
She laughed, a low throaty sound. “The pleasure is all mine. Again.”
They sat in silence again, Jamie tapping his fingers along to the song’s beat. Claire was the first to break it.
“So, Jamie… at the risk of sounding super cliche… what do you do nowadays?”
“I’m a book editor. Well… assistant book editor.”
Claire’s eyes grew wide and shimmery. “Wow… That’s great!”
“It’s okay. I would like to take the ‘assistant’ off my title eventually, but it’s fine for now. And you, Claire? What is it that ye do?”
“I’m a doctor.” Jamie saw her shoulders straighten and her lips quirk; she was proud, as she should be.
“Ye were always smart. I do remember that.”
Jamie thought he saw her blush, but the lights were so dim, he couldn’t be sure. “Thanks, Jamie.”
The music shifted to another fast-paced, beat heavy song.
“Claire?”
“Hmm?” She was nose deep in her drink.
“Would ye like to dance?”She spluttered a bit, coughing against her cup. “Ye dinna have to, of course.”
“No, no! I was just surprised you’d ask, is all.” She wipes her mouth with the back of her hand. “I would like to, and don’t think this is a stupid excuse not to… But I was actually going to head to the snack table before you sat down. I’m starving!” As if I’m cue, a small growl sounded from her midsection. Jamie chuckled. “So, can we head over there first?”
“Of course.” He stood up, holding out his hand to her. “Let’s refuel before we dance.”
***
Jamie and Claire milled around the food table, catching up in between mouthfuls of cheese and pretzel bites.
“So, She showed up in a white dress… for your sister’s wedding?!”
“Aye! It’s no a good idea to invite yer ex to yer wedding, I expect. And Ian wouldn’t have invited her, but their parents are good friends. But, that was remedied fairly quickly, I’d say.”
Claire rubbed her hands together mischievously, itching for the gossip. “Oooh, do tell!”
“Weel, our mam and Ian’s mam worked up a plan, see? That involved two full glasses of wine…”
“Oh, no!”
“Oh, yes! They were walking and talking, pretending to be minding their own. Then, they walked right into Em, spilling their drinks all over her.”
“I’m assuming red wine?”
“Of course! They were good actresses too. Apologizing, trying to wipe her dress. But the damage was done, and Em went home crying.”
“That is… amazing!”
They both doubled over, laughing. Jamie wasn’t sure of the last time he laughed this hard, so carefree. Sure, it was partly because they were both a bit tipsy, but it was also something about Claire’s presence that lit him up from within.
The mood shifted, as did the song. Slow and steady. Claire looked up at him through her lashes, her dark eyes flashing from the dance floor lights.
“I think I’m ready for that dance now.”
***
It had been a couple years since Jamie had been this close to a woman. A beautiful woman, no less. Claire’s body held a pleasant softness within the confines of a thick wool dress. She was fire, warm and engulfing. He would gladly burn.
Jamie’s hands tightened on her waist, pressing his nose against her curls. What they were doing could barely be considered dancing. They swayed a bit to the beat, but remained happily in each other’s arms.
“You want to know a secret?” Claire whispered against his cheek. Her breath smelled of rum and sweetness.
“Hmm?”
“I had a crush on you in school.” She spoke as if were the most casual comment, but for Jamie, it shook his world.
“Ye did?”
“Mmhmm. But you were too intimidating to talk to.”
“Me?” He tilted his head backward to look into her owlish eyes. “Ye were the most intimidating woman I had ever met!”
“What?”
“Aye. Ye were smart and beautiful and ye didna take any shite from anyone.”
Claire giggled low in her throat. “Well, I appreciate that.”
“I thought ye dated guys in college?”
“I date one guy in college and suddenly it becomes a habit. No, I was your secret admirer for many years.”
“Yer joking! I… I liked ye for so long. But, those rumors… They kept me away, see?”
“Well, damn.”
Jamie pulled her even closer, so their bodies were flush, knee to chest.
“And how do ye feel now?” The alcoholic mixture from earlier was making him bold.
But she was bolder. “My feelings haven’t changed.”
“Nor mine.”
Their lips collided, mouths open, breathing each other in. Jamie’s hands found Claire’s curls, wrapping them around his fingers. Her fingers found purchase on his shoulders, digging into his flesh.They were pulling each other closer, closer…
“Would it be forward of me to ask ye to come to my flat?” Jamie panted.
“Would it be forward of me to come to your flat?”
“Nay. I’d say it was a long time coming.”
“Then let's go.”
Jamie grabbed Claire’s hand, and, without a second glance backward at his sister and brother-in-law, walked out the door. He would have much to answer for later, but for now, he was glad to be out of that lime green hellhole and in the comfort of Claire’s arms.
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airbookworm · 8 years
Text
Secrets of the Past
~with Aden (36) and Jinora(33)~
Aden
Well over a decade had passed since the unlikely pairing had taken the next step and wed. The years had brought the couple two children even with Aden’s fear of passing on his ‘curse’. Everything seemed to be going well, but as the children grew and eventually went off to school, Aden’s worries grew.
The children would bring home Republic City history books and homework that included lies about the ‘terrorist’ group that attacked the benders of the city. Years of keeping his past a secret was starting to wear the former equalist down. No one, but his loving wife, knew the truth of Aden’s past. Of how his parents died, of his few years in the Threats, and especially not of his time as an equalist. Everyone had to learn the truth. Jinora’s parents, their friends, their kids.
One night after a trying day at the docks and an afternoon of helping the children with their homework, Aden spoke up. “I can’t handle this anymore, Jin. I can’t keep lying to everyone.”
Jinora
“So stop lying and tell them that you still hug the kids each and every morning. No one will think that’s a bad thing, they’ll think ‘oh, such a good dad,’ which you are,” Jinora responded tiredly without looking at him. Instead her attention was on the basket of clothes by her feet, which she was steadily folding and sorting into piles. She had meant to get to them earlier, but the day’s events hadn’t allowed it until she and her husband managed to get the kids to bed.
The couple’s lives had always been hectic it seemed, and being married with kids was no different. It made her wonder just how her mother and father managed four kids during everything that had happened. She always made a note when she thought of it to tell her parents she loved them and was thankful for them and all their help. Having someone who loved the kids and loved to watch them was always nice when she and Aden needed some down time.
Today hadn’t been one of those days. The entire day had been hectic and busy, both at home and work, and she was glad to just sit and do something mundane without serious thought for a few minutes. When she realized he hadn’t responded to her words, she looked up at him, brow furrowing slightly.
“You’re not talking about morning hugs , are you?”
Aden
His wonderful wife was so busy with her own work that she really didn’t know what he was talking about. Most afternoons it was Aden’s job to make sure homework got done while she finished whatever air duties she was tasked with. As Jinora spoke he responded with a shake of his head. “My boss knows I have to help with the kids in the morning, that’s not a problem anymore.”
Grabbing the extra basket, he started placing the folded clothes that were to be taken up to the couples bedroom inside. Jinora was in her own mind right now, she looked exhausted. He leaned down to kiss the top of her head while she finished folding the clothes.
Maybe now wasn’t the best time to start this conversation. They could talk when she wasn’t so out of it. “No. It’s not the morning hugs. Just when you have some free time, look at Navid’s latest lesson.”
Jinora
Jinora paused in her folding, giving her husband a curious look. “Navid’s lessons? What about them?” she asked, folding the shirt before pausing completely. She leaned back into the couch, looking at him carefully.
“Aden, talk to me. I probably won’t get to look at his homework tomorrow morning, and I’d like to avoid talking to his teacher. The man doesn’t know his gurus from his Water Tribe leaders,” she muttered offhandedly before putting the shirt in the basket. She covered one of his hands with her own, tangling her fingers with his.
“What’s the deal with the lessons, honey?”
Aden
As Jinora wrapped their hands together, he brought them up to kiss the back of her hand. “It’s not Navid or the teacher.” He sighed. This stuff should not bother him. Amon and the Revelation fell over 20 years ago, and he still couldn’t help but feel something when his old cause was brought up. Especially when everything he had read earlier in the day was completely false.
“They’ve started looking into a little more recent history. They’re going to start getting into Avatar Korra’s arrival to the city. You remember what was happening then..” He looked up at Jinora, face showing the slightest bit of sadness.
“I don’t want to lie to everyone anymore.”
Jinora
Automatically Jinora moved closer to him, her free hand reaching out to touch his cheek as she leaned in to kiss him. She pulled away after a moment, squeezing his hand as she looked at him seriously.
“So don’t,” she said simply. “Don’t lie about this. I know, and I love you. We can tell the kids, and they’ll both love you. Navid will think you’re the toughest, coolest dad ever and Sesi will think you’re even more amazing than before. We’re not going anywhere, and no one can make us leave you. You don’t have to keep the truth a secret anymore.”
Aden
Aden can’t say he wasn’t a bit shocked by the kiss. As Jinora broke it though, he pulled her up onto his lap and returned the kiss. The former street rat was definitely blessed with such an understanding wife, but it didn’t help with his worries.
“You didn’t read the stuff he brought home. It’s all lies. Everything was so exaggerated. And what about your parents? Sesi and Navid are with them so often. And the people at school and they’re gonna learn about what w- what the equalists tried to do to you. Your family.”
He closed his eyes for a second. “I’m scared, Jin”
Jinora
She settled in his arms, cuddling to him as she thought. Admittedly they had never really planned something like this happening, or discussed it much. Telling her parents about the past had always been something they’d disagreed about on some level, but these were their children. They couldn’t be arguing about what to tell their kids.
“No need to be scared,” Jinora muttered, lifting their joined hands to kiss the back of his hand. “The kids will still love you and my parents.. they’ll understand, they’ll be okay. I can talk to the teacher and tell him I don’t want him teaching Navid about the movement, tell him I’ll take care of Navid’s history lessons. I can teach Sesi history when her class gets there as well.”
“We can do this, Aden. We can be us, we can be honest, and it’ll all be okay. No need for fear.”
Aden
This is something Aden should have been able to leave in the past. The movement was dead and he had nothing to do with it or his former allies anymore. He was happy. Finally actually happy but for some reason he still felt attached to the dead cause. Maybe he should have listened to Jinora all those years ago and told her family. Everything would be so much easier.
“I can’t ask you to do that just because I’m sensitive of my mistakes. You’re far too busy to be adding history lessons to your plate.” He sighed laying his chin against her. “How to you know your parents will understand… That they’ll be okay knowing that their eldest daughter became friends with and married an equalist”
“I hope you know what you’re doing, love, cause I sure don’t.”
Jinora
“I know they’ll be okay because you’re family to them now,” she said confidently, lightly shaking their hands, as if in triumph. “You’re not just some guy who married their daughter, you’re their son-in-law, a third son. Father of two of their grandkids, you are family. Family makes mistakes, it happens, but there’s forgiveness for everyone. Family, friends, rude neighbors, mean shoppers, thieves, equalists; everyone is deserving of forgiveness, and you’ve had it for such a long time, even if you didn’t know it.”
Jinora shifted in his arms again, making it so she could comfortably rest her head on his shoulder. “I don’t know what I’m doing wither, but I know we’re doing it together. Marriage is a team, and you’re my partner- I’d bet on us in a parenting competition against the other parents from school.”
Aden
Aden stayed quiet for a few minutes as Jinora spoke. She was right. He had long since become a member of the airbending family. Everyone treated him so nice and even Tenzin didn’t act like he was just someone who took his daughter away. The news would probably come as a shock, but they would understand. Jinora was always right.
Squeezing her hand, Aden finally spoke. “After a life of mistakes, I don’t know how I got so lucky with you. You’re just.. You always know what to do and say.” As Jinora adjusted, Aden released her hand so that he could wrap his arms around her with a little laugh. “You’re weird sometimes, Jin”
“And I know that you’re right.. But I’ve kept this hidden from them for so long. I can’t help but be a little scared.”
Jinora
“Not always,” Jinora responded, stifling a yawn. “I’ve made plenty of mistakes, said and done the wrong things; Ikki and Meelo will attest to that. And you love my weirdness.”
“I’m a little scared too, but I’ve got you. I know we’ll make it through it all together. We always have, remember?”
Aden
“Seems like you always do and Ikki and Meelo just love proving you wrong.” Aden kissed her cheek. “We somehow keep making it through to the other side. Don’t know how we keep doing it.”
“I do love your weirdness. Now why don’t you head up to bed? I’ll finish folding the laundry and we’ll figure out how to bring up this topic tomorrow.”
Jinora
“I’m the lucky one,” Jinora muttered with a grin. “Two great kids and a loving husband that sends me to bed so he can finish the laundry; how did I get that lucky, hm?”
She let out a light chuckle before moving so she was next to Aden instead of in his lap, pressing a kiss to his cheek as she did so. She then leaned forward to grab another shirt and folded it. “Team effort, honey. Team effort.”
Aden
A smile crossed Aden’s face. “You gave a street rat, who would do anything to make the ones he loves happy, a chance. Your kindness is how you got lucky.”
Aden sat back up as Jinora moved off his lap. Returning the kiss as she folded a shirt. Once the shirt was set down, Aden stood up in order to pick Jinora up. “You are not folding any more clothes. I am taking you upstairs to bed and I’m going to finish these.”
Jinora
“Aden!” Jinora laughed, wrapping her arms around his neck as he picked her up. “Aden, put me down. You lift heavy things at the docks all day, no reason you should be picking me up at home,” she argued, even as she lifted her feet so she didn’t knock a vase of flowers down as Aden walked past it.
She let out an exaggerated sigh as he started up the steps, making sure her legs were tucked down to avoid scraping against the wall. “You should come to bed with me; laundry can wait until tomorrow.”
Aden
“Shhhh Jin. You’re gonna wake the kids and I don’t want to have to tell Sesi another story.” Aden stated in a hushed voice. “Exactly. I lift heavy crates at work. You’re far from heavy, love. Plus you deserve a little spoiling sometimes.”
“Do you really want it to wait until tomorrow?” He asked as he carefully set Jinora down on the bed. “I can go down and finish it so we don’t have to worry about it.”
Jinora
“Stay- you get up early for work too, you need sleep more than I do,” Jinora responded, refusing to unlock her arms from around his neck.
“Laundry can wait. It never goes away, and Navid would probably knock the basket over in the morning anyways and I’d refold it all tomorrow. Stay, sleep.”
Aden
“Everyone in this house wakes up early. I do not need more sleep than anyone else. You deal with all the air acolytes from all the different temples daily. Along with training and household stuff. You’re always so busy.” Aden kissed her head with a smile.
“You will not. I’ll fold it. I told you that I would so I will in the morning.” He shifted slightly so that he was laying next to her. “Okay? Now you sleep. I won’t go anywhere.”
Jinora
“You lift heavy crates all day, said so yourself. You need rest and relaxation at home, not carrying your wife and staying up to finish folding clothes,” she muttered, rolling onto her side and snuggling up to him.
“Hey,” she mumbled after a few minutes of silence, her voice sleepy. “We can make the kids fold the clothes. Try to fold, anyways. They can sort at least.”
Aden
“I don’t need rest and relaxation. I’m perfectly fine. Plus I enjoy carrying my beautiful wife and helping her with stuff around the house.” He waited until she got herself comfortable before wrapping his arms around her.
“I think that’ll end up being more trouble than it’s worth” he stated with a yawn. “Now sleep. You sound exhausted”
Jinora
“Worth a try,” she chuckled. It felt like a perfect golden moment, both of them sleepy and in each other’s arms. A perfect shining moment to be added to their growing collection, and despite all the dark and scary moments, Jinora wouldn’t have traded any of them in. They simply added to the happy times in their life, partnership, marriage. It was simply them, and it was perfect.
“You sleep,” she mumbled once more, already half asleep herself. “Love you, Aden..”
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cyberkevvideo · 4 years
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Throne of Night Theory Builds Part 22: Appraisal Golems
What’s funny is until today, I hadn’t even considered making this a build. It was reading the background for the build I was originally going to release that I realized that this was supposed to be one. Whoops. I’m taking care of that right now.
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As always, for space reasons, I’ll be cropping the encounter build.
All images shared here were done by the forever fantastic and amazingly talented Michael D. Clarke, aka SpiralMagus
Won’t be sharing this all that often, but want to make sure it’s seen. It suggested I make one because there are those who’ve expressed they want to reward my efforts, so I made a Ko-Fi page. No pressure in supporting it though. I know we’re all experiencing financially trying times right now.
Finally, before get to it, I hope everyone’s staying safe right now.
When I saw the art, I originally thought it was an iron golem, but was surprised when SpiralMagus specified that it was actually a stone golem. I found that odd considering there was a very obvious stone golem watching over the secret entrance to Dammerhall, the dwarven kingdom. Reading the background, there’s apparently two: one to test your worthiness of find the entrance, and another to test your worthiness as ruler. So, I did what I could to augment the second one, but still give the first one something extra as well.
The template I gave it is from 101 Not So Simple Templates. I really love that book. As for the abilities, such as Chassis of Intuitive Items and Appraise Worthiness,  I just made them up. The Self Repair I took from combining a 3.5 ring of regeneration and mixing a little of a lich’s and a graveknight’s ability to rejuvenate itself. If this thing is supposed to be able to stick around to judge worthy rulers, it needs to repair itself. The other modifications came from Ultimate Magic. Lastly, the “worthiness”, while I made it up, I took inspiration from the relics from War for the Crown Adventure Path. You have to prove your worthiness in order to wield them or access their full power. So, same idea but different concept.
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PROCTOR GOLEM    (CR 13; 25,600 XP) Modified combat clairvoyant rune-carved stone golem N Large construct Init +4; Senses darkvision 60 ft., low-light vision, see invisibility; Perception +4 DEFENSE AC 31, touch 13, flat-footed 31 (+4 insight, +18 natural, –1 size) hp 140 (20d10+30) Fort +11, Ref +11, Will +11 Defensive Abilities improved evasion, improved uncanny dodge, rune of shielding 1/day, stalwart; DR 10/adamantine; Immune construct traits, magic OFFENSE Speed 20 ft. Melee 2 +1 hammer fists +33 (3d10+10) Space 10 ft.; Reach 10 ft. Special Attacks precognitive advantage, rune of lightning 2/day, rune of terror 1/day, slow Spell-like Abilities (CL 20th; concentration +16)   Constant—comprehend languages, magic fang, see invisibility, resistance   At will—detect alignment, mending (self only)   1/day—greater make whole STATISTICS Str 28, Dex 11, Con —, Int —, Wis 11, Cha 1 Base Atk +20; CMB +34; CMD 48 Feats Improved Natural Attack (slam)B SQ appraise worthiness, chassis of intuitive items, self-repairing SPECIAL ABILITIES Appraise Worthiness (Ex) A proctor golem tests the worthiness of the kingdom’s future ruler. To be worthy, the creature must perform any number of the following: not run from battle in fear, successfully prevent an innocent from being slain by the golem, protect allies by either healing them in battle or drawing the golem’s attention, or the proctor golem being reduced to one-tenth its hit points. When protecting an innocent, the creature must be half or less than the hit dice of the creature being tested. The testee automatically fails if the innocent creature is purposely put in harm’s way, only to be “rescued” afterwards. A creature that the proctor golem detects as evil may have additional tests programmed into it (determined by the GM). Chassis of Intuitive Items (Sp) The golem’s chest plate is able to produce any one item it requires as a swift action. The item cannot be worth more than 100 gp. This ability can be used once every 1d4 rounds, up to a maximum of five times per day. Detect Alignment (Sp) At will, a proctor golem can use detect chaos, detect evil, detect good, or detect law. It can only use one of these at any given time Immunity to Magic (Ex) A stone golem is immune to any spell or spell-like ability that allows spell resistance. In addition, certain spells and effects function differently against the creature, as noted below.  --A transmute rock to mud spell slows a stone golem (as the slow spell) for 2d6 rounds, with no saving throw, while transmute mud to rock heals all of its lost hit points.  --A stone to flesh spell does not actually change the golem’s structure but negates its damage reduction and immunity to magic for 1 full round. Precognitive Advantage (Ex) A combat clairvoyant creature gains a +4 insight bonus to attack rolls, saving throws, skill, CMB, and initiative checks, and AC. It also knows an opponent’s weakness, likely tactics, or some other vital bit of information ahead of time and prepare accordingly (it has a weapon to overcome a creature’s damage reduction; it has a vial of acid to overcome a troll’s regeneration, etc.), Further, it is never caught flat-footed and as such can act in surprise rounds (though it must still roll for initiative). Rune of Lightning (Sp) This rune is triggered when the golem is hit by a melee attack. The rune releases a 5-foot-radius burst of electricity (CL 5th) dealing 3d8 points of electrical damage to all creatures within the burst. A successful DC 12 Reflex saving throw halves the damage. Rune of Shielding (Sp) This rune is triggered the first time the golem is attacked with a melee attack, ranged attack, or magic missile. The construct gains a +4 shield bonus to its Armor Class for 3 minutes. This is a force effect and applies against incorporeal touch attacks. Rune of Terror (Sp) This rune is triggered the first time a creature moves adjacent to the modified construct. The rune creates a 20-foot-radius spread of necromantic energy. Creatures in the area must succeed on a DC 20 Will saving throw or become panicked for 1d4 rounds. If the Will save succeeds, the creature is shaken for 1 round. Self-Repairing (Ex) A proctor golem heals 1 point of damage per level every hour as long as it has at least 1 hp. If the golem is destroyed, but its core (hardness 20, 120 hp, break DC 40) survives, it instead heals 1 point of damage per level every day until it reaches 1 hp. Slow (Su) A stone golem can use a slow effect, as the spell, as a free action once every 2 rounds. The effect has a range of 10 feet in a burst centered on the golem and a duration of 7 rounds, requiring a DC 17 Will save to negate. The save DC is Constitution-based.
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This is the original golem you meet, and its hiding the secret entrance that takes you to Dammerhall. This one will have a version of the “Appraise Worthiness”, but a lesser version as you’re supposed to be able to bypass it “either by honest deed or dark deception“, and only one successful test. It might have detect alignment, but probably not. Either way, it’d still end up being your standard CR 11 stone golem from the bestiary.
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If all goes well, this hidden tunnel should take you directly to the underground city. Eventually, once you’ve beaten everyone and taken down the “deathless dragon high dwarf king”, the curse should be lift and you’re finally allowed outside. This will give the PCs their first full view of Dammerhall and all its splendor. That’s my theory anyhow, based on the brief notes Gary left behind.
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thequantumqueer · 7 years
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I was tagged by @batpositivity
Rules: Answer some shit and tag people maybe
THE LAST:
1. Drink: milk 2. Phone call: uhhh my mom probably idk 3. Text message: @thenonbinaryspacegem 4. Song you listened to: idk it was awhile ago. the Neon Jungle cover of Take Me to Church i think? 5. Time you cried: this past saturday afternoon, thinking about CMH
HAVE YOU: 6. Dated someone twice: yes 7. Kissed someone and regretted it: nah 8. Been cheated on: no 9. Lost someone special: absofuckinglutely 10. Been depressed: this implies the past tense so no lmao 11. Gotten drunk and thrown up: hoo boy yes
LIST 3 FAVORITE COLORS: 12-14: purple, lavender, forest green
IN THE LAST YEAR HAVE YOU: 15. Made new friends: yes 16. Fallen out of love: nope :D 17. Laughed until you cried: probably 18. Found out someone was talking about you: i don’t matter enough for people to talk about me lmao 19. Met someone who changed you: idk. im really bad at keeping track of when i meet people 20. Found out who your friends are: a combination of a relatively low-stress year and already mostly knowing who i can count on makes this a no 21. Kissed someone on your Facebook list: well my husband is on there so...
GENERAL: 22. How many of your Facebook friends do you know in real life: no idea i dont use my facebook enough to even know who all is on there 23. Do you have any pets: sort of. @selkieblues has a dog and im moving in with her 24. Do you want to change your name: i already changed it. now it’s a question of making the paperwork happen to give the change legal weight 25. What did you do for your last Birthday: i don’t remember and i don’t think that’s because of alcohol i think it’s just my shitty brain 26. What time did you wake up: like 15 minutes ago so like. 1:30am 27. What were you doing at midnight last night: sitting off in the corner at a kink party, talking about the intricacies of consent and taboo  28. Name something you can’t wait for: the sweet release of death  29. When was the last time you saw your mom: like a week and a half ago, but the time before that was almost 4 years ago so dont get the wrong impression 30. What is one thing you wish you could change in your life? it would be nice to be healthy i think. idk im not sure i quite understand what that’d be like 31. What are you listening right now: the sound of the air conditioner and staticky radio signals that the speakers are picking up 32. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom: Yes 33. Something that is getting on your nerves: my nerves lmao 34. Most visited Website: tumblr
LOST QUESTIONS. I JUST PUT IN RANDOM INFO ABOUT ME
35. Mole/s: lots, including 3 on my arm that form orion’s belt 36. Mark/s: freckles everywhere, parallel scars on the back of my left arm, a nasty scar on my right inner forearm, a scar on my right shin 37. Childhood dream: to be an astronaut 38. Haircolor: brown 39. Long or short hair: longish 40. Do you have a crush on someone: i am deeply and irrevocably in love with my husband. i also have a longstanding crush on at least one mutual 41. What do you like about yourself: im a talented writer (yes i mean talent, not skill. ive barely developed that shit at all) and a loyal friend 42. Piercings: industrial in my left ear, daith in my right, and my lobes are 1/2″ 43. Bloodtype: red, usually 44. Nickname: Quantum 45. Relationship status: married and polya 46. Zodiac: libra AND capricorn 47. Pronouns: xe/xem, but anything works 48. Favorite TV Show: dont have one atm 49. Tattoos: a potato above my right ankle, a dr seuss hat on my upper left back, and a black line around my wedding finger 50. Right or left hand: right 51. Surgery: one as an infant, and 6 teeth removed, including wisdom 52. Hair dyed in different color: i had it black once and liked that. i eventually want it purple long-term 53. Sport: no 55. Vacation: there are SO MANY PEOPLE i want to visit 56. Pair of trainers: i am a Clunky Boots Gay™ because ankle support
MORE GENERAL: 57. Eating: nothing but i probably should get something 58. Drinking: ditto the eating 59. I’m about to: do something probably? idk its 2am 61. Waiting for: the 15th, when i’ll finally be moving 62. Want: to see my husband 63. Get married: been there, done that, quite literally got the tshirt 64. Career: i want to support myself with my chain maille
WHICH IS BETTER 65. Hugs or kisses: doesn’t matter as long as there are concurrent cuddles 66. Lips or eyes: eyes 67. Shorter or taller: shorter is good but i have no basis for comparison 68. Older or younger: ive literally never been with someone older than me 70. Nice arms or nice stomach: wtf even is a “nice stomach” all stomachs are weird and gross regardless of size do you realize that’s where your body makes poop like what the fuck nice arms are so much better 71. Sensitive or loud: Sensitive 72. Hook up or relationship: ¿por qué no las dos? 73. Troublemaker or hesitant: i will hesitate enough for the both of us
HAVE YOU EVER: 74. Kissed a stranger: yes 75. Drank hard liquor: yes 76. Lost glasses/contact lenses: yes 77. Turned someone down: yes 78. Sex on the first date: yes 79. Broken someone’s heart: yes 80. Had your heart broken: yes 81. Been arrested: yes 82. Cried when someone died: yes 83. Fallen for a friend: yes
(fuck ive never said yes to literally all of them before holy shit)
DO YOU BELIEVE IN: 84. Yourself: no 85. Miracles: i believe in confirmation bias and the law of large numbers 86. Love at first sight: no 87. Santa Claus: yes (my religious philosophy is super cool ask me about it) 88. Kiss in the first date: yes 89. Angels: see “Santa Claus”
OTHER: 90. Current best friends name: Abby “@greenreticule“ [REDACTED] 91. Eye color: hazel 92. Favorite movie: my top 3 in no particular order are Wonder Woman, The Book of Life, and Wreck-It Ralph
ima tag @jcurnalism @sarcastic-clapping @eyeb0t @hopeandhandler @crpl-pnk @sailorsanghelios and everyone i tagged higher up in the post
and then ima be salty that it wont let me tag @qjusttheletter aka “the husband i keep talking about”
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thiscityneedsyounow · 7 years
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can you answer #1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 39 40 41 42 43 44 45 46 47 48 49 50 51 52 53 54 55 56 57 58 59 60 61 62 63 64 65 66 67 68 69 70 71 72 73 74 75 76 77 78 79 80 81 82 83 84 85 86 87 88 89 90 91 92 93 94 95 96 97 98 99 100 101 102 103 104 105 106 107 108 109 110 111 112 113 114 115 116 117 118 119 120 121 122 123 124 125 126 127 128 129 130 131 132 133 134 135 136 137 138 139 140 141 142 143 144 145 146 and 147?
Good lord. Sure though, I’ll do it. Under the cut~
147: Autumn or Spring: Autumn!146: Chocolate or vanilla: Vanilla.145: Night or Day: Day.144: Oranges or Apples: Apples143: Curly or Straight hair: I don’t care one way or another?142: McDonalds or Burger King: McDonalds.141: White Chocolate or Milk Chocolate: Both!140: Mac or PC: PC139: Flip flops or high heals: Neither, blegh. 138: Ugly and rich OR sweet and poor: I don’t really care? Sweet & poor.137: Coke or Pepsi: Depends on what I’m eating. 136: Hillary or Obama: Wow how outdated is this. #BringBackObama135: Burried or cremated: I’d like to be cremated tbh134: Singing or Dancing: Singing!133: Coach or Chanel: Uhhhh.. Coach?132: Kat McPhee or Taylor Hicks: Who?131: Small town or Big city: Big city, all the way.130: Wal-Mart or Target: Target.129: Ben Stiller or Adam Sandler: Ben Stiller I guess?128: Manicure or Pedicure: Manicure.127: East Coast or West Coast: EAST COAST BEAST COAST @wan-shailu126: Your Birthday or Christmas: Christmas.125: Chocolate or Flowers: Chocolate.124: Disney or Six Flags: Disney.123: Yankees or Red Sox: Red Sox all the way.[ Here’s What I Think About ]122: War: ‘What do we need it for?’121: George Bush: Good lord I’ll take HIM over the orange cheetopuff now.120: Gay Marriage: Dude, love is love. Let people be.119: The presidential election: WHAT THE HAP IS FUCKENING 118: Abortion: Pro-choice.117: MySpace: Never had one.116: Reality TV: Fun to watch when I’m bored.115: Parents: Mine are actually really cool.114: Back stabbers: Fuck ‘em. Betray my trust and I’ll never trust you again.113: Ebay: Kinda cool tbh.112: Facebook: Ehh. I use it like once a month.111: Work: A necessary evil.110: My Neighbors: Chill folks, don’t really talk to them that much.109: Gas Prices: A bit higher than usual right now, they’re ok.108: Designer Clothes: Stupidly overprices and they never fit right.107: College: I still want to go one day.106: Sports: Watching? It’s cool. Playing? fuck no.105: My family: I love ‘em, honestly. A really good family.104: The future: Eh. Your path is what you make it.[ Last time I ]103: Hugged someone: Not too long ago, my little bro.102: Last time you ate: Uhh.. A few hours ago? 101: Saw someone I haven’t seen in awhile: I mean.. I’m talking to an old friend I haven’t talked to in ages if that counts100: Cried in front of someone: Not in over a year.99: Went to a movie theater: Uhh.. Shit Alex when was the last time.. Force Awakens? Deadpool? Whichever came out more recently.98: Took a vacation: Lord don’t ask me this question.97: Swam in a pool: Same as above ^96: Changed a diaper: Not since my little sister wore them, so 5 or 6 years.95: Got my nails done: Never.94: Went to a wedding: Not since my dad’s second wedding. Think I was 9 or 10?93: Broke a bone: Freshman year of high school.92: Got a peircing: 9 or 10? got my ears pierced91: Broke the law: uhhhh90: Texted: Technically? I haven’t[ MISC ]89: Who makes you laugh the most: No one particular person. The people in the pineapple chat do a lot though88: Something I will really miss when I leave home is: My cats, being close to my family87: The last movie I saw: Regrettably, The Bee Movie.86: The thing that I’m looking forward to the most: No idea right now.85: The thing im not looking forward to: Above.84: People call me: Crazy. Magpie. Mira. Yawny.83: The most difficult thing to do is: Overcome your fears.82: I have gotten a speeding ticket: Naw, I don’t drive.81: My zodiac sign is: Virgo.80: The first person i talked to today was: Also my little brother.79: First time you had a crush: Hmm.. 4th grade I think? I don’t remember his name, something with an E.78: The one person who i can’t hide things from: Hydra is one, Sam is another. Alex (both Alexes I know) too.77: Last time someone said something you were thinking: Last night, something about cats.76: Right now I am talking to: Daniel, and the group of nerds in the pineapple chat75: What are you going to do when you grow up: Man, when do we ever grow up? But honestly, being a falconer would be so amazing.74: I have/will get a job: Eventually.73: Tomorrow: Wake up. Cook food. Talk to people. Sleep.72: Today: Same as tomorrow.71: Next Summer: Who knows, we might all be dead.70: Next Weekend: Same as tomorrow.69: I have these pets: Two black cats, Merlin and Gwen.68: The worst sound in the world: Tornado sirens…67: The person that makes me cry the most is: well fuck I dunno66: People that make you happy: See questions 89 and 78.65: Last time I cried: Over a year ago.64: My friends are: All over the place. They’re amazing.63: My computer is: pretty important to me.62: My School: lmao what school61: My Car: lmao what car60: I lose all respect for people who: Betray trust. Aren’t honest.59: The movie I cried at was: Kubo and the Two Strings.58: Your hair color is: Reddish/brown57: TV shows you watch: Merlin, Bob’s Burgers,Raising Hope.. Not a lot else rn56: Favorite web site: Uhh… I spend a lot of time on youtube?55: Your dream vacation: Any vacation, at this point.54: The worst pain I was ever in was: Hmm..53: How do you like your steak cooked: Well done pls52: My room is: A little messy, kinda plain. Like a safe haven.51: My favorite celebrity is: I don’t really have one.50: Where would you like to be: Somewhere up north?49: Do you want children: Ehhh, maybe.48: Ever been in love: Yeah. 47: Who’s your best friend: I don’t really have one best friend.46: More guy friends or girl friends: Most of my friends are guys, yeah.45: One thing that makes you feel great is: Talking to friends, tbh.44: One person that you wish you could see right now: 43: Do you have a 5 year plan: lol nope42: Have you made a list of things to do before you die: 41: Have you pre-named your children: HAH you’re funny40: Last person I got mad at: 39: I would like to move to: 38: I wish I was a professional: [ My Favorites ]37: Candy:36: Vehicle:35: President:34: State visited:33: Cellphone provider:32: Athlete:31: Actor:30: Actress:29: Singer:28: Band:27: Clothing store:26: Grocery store:25: TV show:24: Movie:23: Website:22: Animal:21: Theme park:20: Holiday:19: Sport to watch:18: Sport to play:17: Magazine:16: Book:15: Day of the week:14: Beach:13: Concert attended:12: Thing to cook:11: Food:10: Restaurant:9: Radio station:8: Yankee candle scent:7: Perfume:6: Flower:5: Color:4: Talk show host:3: Comedian:2: Dog breed:1: Did you answer all these truthfully?
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thefvlcon · 7 years
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rules: answer all questions, add one question of your own and tag as many people as there are questions.
i was tagged by @jacesimon, who gives great advice on ingrown toenails and is The Best
1.coke or pepsi: coke
2. disney or dreamworks: disney
3. coffee or tea: both??? B O TH ???
4. books or movies: listen....i love reading.....but nowadays i like movies more
5. windows or mac: mac
6. dc or marvel: marvel, but i kinda grew up with dc cartoons (the justice league cartoons???? a gift from up above)
7. x-box or playstation: neither
8. dragon age or mass effect: neither
9. night owl or early riser: night owl
10. cards or chess: chess bc i can’t play cards lmao
11. chocolate or vanilla: both
12. vans or converse: converse
13. lavellan, trevelyan, cadash, or adaar: w h a t
14. fluff or angst:  i’m always down for some Angst
15. beach or forest: beach
16. dogs or cats: both?? i can’t decide??
17. clear skies or rain: rain (unless i’m swimming)
18. cooking or eating out: eating out bc i can only cook rice and chicken nuggets and eggs
19. spicy food or mild food: BRING FORTH THE S P I C Y FOOD
20. halloween/samhain or solstice/yule/christmas: christmas!! CHRISTMAS!! C H R I S T M A S
21. would you rather forever be a little too cold or a little too hot: a little too hot bc i am a fragile tropical bird who can’t stand it even when it’s just a little too cold
22. if you could have any superpower, what would it be?: telekinesis or teleportation idk?
23. animation or live action: why are you asking me this question......as if i could ever choose one over the other......
24. paragon or renegade: again......w h a t
25. baths or showers: showers
26. team cap or team ironman: team cap
27: fantasy or sci-fi: both
28. do you have three or four favorite quotes, if so what are they: 
1) “Stones are just stones and rain is just rain and misfortune is just bad luck.” - Anthony Doerr, All the Light We Cannot See; 
2) “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.” - C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves;
3) “I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo. "So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.” - J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring;
29. netflix or youtube: both
30. Harry Potter or Percy Jackson: percy jackson
31. when you feel accomplished: when i (eventually) finish a project i’ve started and when i get good grades on exams and make my parents proud
32. star wars or star trek: ...both
33. paperback or hardback: paperback
34. horror or rom-com: rom-com
35: Tv shows or movies: both
36. spotify or pandora: spotify
37. zootopia or inside out: zootopia
38. favorite book: east west street by philippe sands
39. favourite flower: sunflower
40. what field of study are you in (or aspire to be in): international law
41. song lyric you really love: 
Hold me in this wild, wild world / Cause in your warmth I forget how cold it can be / And in your heat I feel how cold it can get - Bastille, Warmth
OR 
Yes, it's easier to bury / My head in the sand sometimes / And I know, I know, I know / It's not the right way to go / But I pray for the ground to swallow me whole - Bastille, Snakes
42. what’s your MBTI type? intj
43. what is your zodiac sign? sagittarius
44. what is your favourite place to go? home
45. favorite stuff animal as a kid? it was a giant killer whale and i named her fluffy...now it’s my elephant pillow pet
46. at a movie: candy or popcorn? popcorn i guess?
47. lord of the rings or narnia? shit why did i choose this question.....i grew up with both narnia and lotr but i think i’ll have to go with lotr (i can feel c.s. lewis frowning at me i’m so sorry man)
tagging: @coopersbettie @ahvenjers @kokoiki @therussobrothers @persiancap @thelastjedl 
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adhdchipmunk · 6 years
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ADHD, IBS, and existing
Growing up I was always scatterbrained and messy, and once in awhile I'd get horrible horrible stomach attacks. Doctor's never figured it out, and with how rare theu were, didn't really try. My Grandparents raised me and didn't believe ADHD was even a thing, and being a girl who was mainly expected to get married and have babies, not go to college and persue a career, no one bothered diagnosing me. Yes, my family was every inch that sexist. I on the other hand wanted to be Something of my own. Not so and so's wife or so and so's mom. I wasn't sure What I wanted to be though, that changed with my current interests. The only constant about me was reading. I'd go through 2 to 5 books a day. I read while walking, eating, sitting in class, riding on the bus. In retrospect, I suspect this was because books were, for me, the perfect hyperfixation. Constantly changing and offering new stimuli, without requiring me to negotiate with my lack of executive function to get started.
I graduated at 17 (summer baby) and moved out, ran back into my best friend and sweetheart from when I was 15 (grandparents seperated us cause I was 'too young' to date), promptly fell back in love, got married and popped out a little boy. Things went straight to hell. Our house was a complete disaster, we had lost our first pregnancy 2 weeks before she was due and I was already heavily deprssed. I was almost constantly exhausted, I'd wake up long enough to feed my little one, or change him, or burp him, or what have you, and then pass back out, but then it was time to introduce solids, well, babyfood solids, and I had a complete meltdown. I couldn't take care of him. I felt utterly isolated. I didn't think anyone would help me, I thought I had to do it all myself. My hubby tried to help in a way thst just made things infinitely worse. Basically, he'd watch our son till he'd need something, then wake me up to come out and take care of the thing. Whereas, when he wasn't helping, I co-slept and would only have to wake up enough to handle the situation and then go back to sleep. What I really needed was someone who'd clean all the baby spoons and take out the trash with the diapers and maybe was the onesies???
Things happened and my mother in law ended up taking our son full time for about 4 years. It was not easy, but she'd raised all 5 of hers and they were alive, albeit not all fantastic people. But at least, I felt, he would survive her parenting. I didn't feel the same about mine.
Some time in that 4 year span, I stopped having stomach attacks once or twice a month, and started having them literally every day. I'd gone back to school, but couldn't keep up between my constant struggle to try to adult and being sick enough I could barely get in to classes most days.
A trip to the ER at the pleading of friends led to a doctor suggesting gallstones, which was not the problem, but in turn led to figuring out my trigger... eventually. Took awhile. First we tried cutting down on fats. Thing was, I could eat half an avocado (16g fat) without repercussions, but a nutrition bar with only 1.5 g fat killed me. And no, it wasn't that the one was processed and the other raw. That 1.5 g? All saturated and concentrated in something smaller than an average candy bar. And thus we discovered my primary trigger. Not fat, but SATURATED fat.
I got my diet under control and went back to school, we reclaimed our son and continued the struggle of existing, I switched colleges and majors, twice in the case of the latter, and, thanks almost entirely to my hubby, managed to eak out a 3.2 at my first school.
The move to the secpnd signaled a dramatic and incredibly stressful period. My hubby's health suddenly went to hell. Massive BP spikes, basically went narcoleptic, falling asleep anywhere and everywhere, (except behind the wheel somehow), dizziness, painful lumps in three unrelated places (all of which ended up being seperate things, blood tumor, cyst, and plantar fibromitosis, basically a thickening of the connective tissue in the foot that can be, and in his case is, very painful).
Additionally, our son was acting up in school, if anothet kid picked on anyone, he'd pick a fight, if he got upset or overwhelmed at school, he'd pitch a fit, including threats of self harm. Around that same time, my sister git diagnosed with ADHD, she told me about how it had effected her and it was basically a recitation of my life, not to mention a quick google search sounded an awful lot like my little man. So we got appointments and got checked out. Our respective shrinks agreed. We definitely had (have) ADHD.
I'm still struggling. Atm I'm not on medication because reasons, my son on the other is, and is on the right one because he's doing great in school, no more ourtbursts and he's on his way to honor roll. He's still definitely got symptoms, particularly at home. He's forgetful and he has the Worst problem with impulse control. "I wanna play on my switch, I'll just sneak into mom and dad's room (against the rules) and sneak out with the controller (he could literally have just asked)" or "I wanna watch youtube, but I'm grounded, I'll just sneak in and take my phone and watch anyway... at 11 pm ... at night... when I should be asleep..." drives me nuts, but at least I get it. My 'demons' are just as bad. Daddy, on the other hand, does Not get it. It's kind of a constant struggle trying to figure out how to get little man to follow the rules and keep his papa from making things worse by trying to discipline him like he's an NT kiddo.
And now I'm 33, just lost my job, hubby's health is finally on the upswing, and I'm suddenly going crazy wanting another kid? And he wants another kid too, but I have no idea if we can make this work. I know so much more now, I know I can ask for help, and I know the kind of help I'll need, but, how can we afford another kid? I don't know if I can honestly hold a job. I did finally graduate in March, and I love the kind of work I'm educated to do. Problem is that I'm not well enough trained and with my ADHD... I struggle to learn things independently without a road map, and programming doesn't really have a road map. It's more like a loose collection of landmarks that may, or may mot have half scribbled notes warning of a pitfal or tip about a shortcut or safe path. And when the notes pay off, I'm golden, but when they don't, I get frustrated and stressed and I ask for help, and apparently this is why I lost my awesome job that I loved.
Anyway, I decided this is just going to be an amalgamation of all the peices of me. ADHD, IBS, programmer, woman, gamer, part time wannabe activist (when I don't get overwhelmed to the point of feeling suicidal, which seems to be my default reaction to failure, stress, and spilling milk, which I do much, much too often to understand how my ancestors survived to reproduce), mother, wife, wannabe lifelong student (no really, can I just go back to school so I can get a masters so maybe when I'm 40 someone will decide I'm worth hiring???).
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venofire-moved · 6 years
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01 03 10 11 15 18 23 25 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 39 (I'm not sorry. I had to stop there though since so many already.)
(fantasy) writer ask meme!
01. which world/region is your favorite? least favorite? why?
   Personally, I really love both Evoles and Hana. My least favorite used to be Vousili until I revamped it. Honestly, there’s not really one I dislike, but I guess if there’s one I’d have to choose it would be between Sindora and Sorestras. 
   Evoles is one of my favorites because it was the first that I made. It’s Tya’s country, and it’s always the one I can most vividly imagine in my head.
   Hana is the other one because it’s just honestly so damn beautiful. I love the dark history of it as well as the customs, the clothes, the buildings, the government.
   Sorestras honestly just hasn’t had a lot of development which puts it low on the list. 
   Sindora isn’t a big problem to me, I just don’t have a whole lot of attachment to the story over all, so I guess it would be low?
03. is there a character without abilities? why are they unique?
   Yup, quite a few! Out of my main characters though, only Leera Fae and Sayka Faire don’t really have abilities. Leera is unique because she’s a pretty powerful lady. She was a part of her country’s forces until she was killed by a shapeshifter. The Matriarch of her country took interest in her ridiculous will power, and sat back to watch what she’d do, which eventually led to allowing her restore completely with the promise of returning a soul back to the Matriarch. 
   Sayka didn’t originally have any abilities at all, but what makes her unique is the fact that she got… so fucked up. In an attempt to help her father, Sayka worked to kill one of the Matriarchs, the collectors of souls, with the Ancient’s Maiske, a sword imbued with the Ancient’s will. In doing so she just displaced the entity that was the Matriarch herself, and ended up possessed as the next host. 
10. what type of clothing do your characters wear?
   That depends on which character it is, where they come from, and their status, honestly. Tya always bundles up in baggy, dark greens, blues, and browns, because those are common fashion in Evoles. Lucien and Sophie kind of wear whatever they find, though they mostly bundle up in cloaks and stuff both to block out the sun and keep warm in Alkais’ freezing temperatures. Rori tends to wear sleeveless things with a low cut that cover her legs and her stomach as well as a lot of gold jewelry just because that was always what she was most comfortable in. Emtirian fashion is a lot of firm fabrics in dark blue, silver, and gold, yet Rori never really wears that stuff. Her attire is closer to what you’d see the Saburan women wearing casually. 
   Anhalia wears things that are kind of like sleeveless vests with light clothing underneath and gloves that cover her arms, as does Veselin because that’s Amaloran fashion. Then Asher and Lacey wear a lot of furs and floral print because those are key points of hannic fashion, as well as flowing fabric. 
11. are there any fancy balls and festivals held in your book?
   I haven’t decided yet whether any of the festivals will actually be present. There’s a gathering present in Tya’s involving the celebration of a new queen but it’s not really a ball or a festival. The only one I know for sure that’s in any of the books is one I haven’t got a specific name for, but in Hana hold a lot to celebrate specific flowers where they harvest them in bulk and make art / clothing out of them.  
    But there are a lot of festivals, like a specific one in each season to celebrate a designated Ancient, and then harvesting festivals are common, then the one where they paint the snow in Alkais. 
15. is any part of your book inspired by fairytales?
    I’m not sure? Maybe unintentionally? But I don’t know a lot about most fairytales, so if it is, it’s subtle or I don’t know it’s there. 
18. what kind of jobs exist in your fantasy world? what is the career of your main character(s)?
   Well there’s a ton. Anything ranging from crate carrier to leader of a country. And it ranges with the characters as well. Tya has had two jobs, both working class, until Lillia named her queen. She was first a stablehand when she was still making her body, occasionally helped on her father’s farm, and then she was essentially an errand runner for Lillia after that. She was supposed to be named Lillia’s first knight but.. that didn’t really get a chance to happen. People in her group all had different jobs- Melody Visser was a hunter that brought fresh game in to restaurants that hired her, Skye Cailbane was an apothecary for the Aikali Queen’s, aka the leaders of Vousili. 
   Lucien and Sophie are both unemployed and find work through flyers mostly. What they do is mostly like the sidequests you’d find in a video game. ‘Go find this in a cave and I’ll pay you’. 
   Anhalia and Leera were both infantry in different countries. Lacey was the Princess of Hana’s body guard.
   Rori wasn’t necessarily employed because the Saburans don’t really do that- they designate jobs to people in the community and if you don’t do the job you’re required to do you don’t get food / shelter. But she was a night guard at the prison. 
   Kiara Razir cut wood and served tables at an Inn as well as occasionally sung. 
   Aspen Varro has a little stall where she sells imported crystals and herbs. 
  There’s a bunch of jobs, I can’t name all of ‘em. 
23. what type of jewelry is typically sold/worn, if any? who would be the one to purchase it?
   All kinds honestly. Again, depends on the country but there are y’know big things and little things, chains, spikes, a whole variety. A lot of my characters wear them. Tya wears a particular fire opal ring, Lucien has a little skeletal hand. 
25. what type of food do people eat in your world/region? is there some only few can afford?
   Evoles is known for really good quality vegetables, Alkais for it’s nice elk / deer meats, Hana for it’s seasonings, Sindora for mushrooms, Amalar for poultry, and Emtiris for rice and bread. Alkais and Evoles are opposites in their food- In Alkais greens are expensive and Evoles meat is expensive. In Amalar, vibrant seasoned meals are the more expensive ones because a lot of the food there is bland and dull colored. 
30. what kind of folklore exists in your world? are there stories people tell their children?   
   There’s a couple myths that are pretty widespread in Arantis- things such as the Matriarchs rise from flames when they collect your souls, and because of that they use ‘flames’ as a curse. 
   There’s also stories such as the Ten Mothers, where it’s said that if you do the thing, and you do it right, and you don’t fuck it up, you can have an absolute mastery in anything you desire. 
   Melborn’s Blood tells of this very precise and difficult ritual that will bring unending happiness, but if you fuck it up you’ll end up crazy. 
   But those are tales. There’s lots of little customs here and there in different counties, like hanging certain herbs outside your home in the fae touched cities in Hana to keep them from messing with your stuff and in Sindora, you never look the snake statues in the eye. 
31. are there prisons in your story? any form of a criminal justice system?
   Yup! The biggest prison in Arantis is called Azenty and it’s in the northern desert of Sorestras. It’s in the middle of nowhere and the only water supply for days on the inside of a massive wall. It harbors the worst of the worst criminals, needless to say. 
    The criminal justice system is different in each country, obviously. In Evoles, the bad crimes are dealt with by the leaders of each city, and generally kept in the dungeons beneath the castles for their terms. Evoles also offers forgiveness systems for example, for Tya after being imprisoned for Arson, she worked off her sentence by helping the High Queen directly, as did Vaisa for his of treason. Of course that’s only really applicable if the High Queen thinks there is something on the same level as the crime to tend to meaning Arson and Treason = saving the country from mass genocide. 
   In Alkais they have trials, and in Vousili, the Court of Queens oversees every decision.
32. how do your characters tell the time of day in your fantasy world/region?
   They tell through the placement of the sun and moon in most places, but clocks are a thing too.
33. do you experiment with government in your story? if so, how?
   Not really. I’m admittedly not overly interested in politics, even if it’s mine. 
34. are there any parts of your world/region that are more industrial than the others? what is produced?
   Yup! In Evoles, the tetranian province is pretty industrial. They work on technology and advancements mostly, and have lately been working on trains. Amalar works on weaponry a lot and glass. Emtiris’ industry is mostly for processing fabric. 
35. are there any laws in your world/region that are important to the plot? any restrictions on magic?
  Well aside from ‘don’t burn down historical monuments’ not really. They aren’t overly fond of teleportation magic and people trying to resurrect other people, but honestly none of them are really illegal.  
36. how do the higher class live? how do the lower class live?
   The upper class have the usual, you know, bigger houses nicer, clothes things like that. There’s also the fact that they can keep food in the house- in Evoles particularly it’s a noticeable thing because the lower classes flock to the Queen’s homes for dinners because they usually have nightly meals to feed the people and things like that. 
    In Hana the upper class is evident in the fact that they’ll live in places like Ashvale, the capital, or Visticaria, the most elaborately beautiful city in all of Hana and possibly the world. The lower classes in Hana travel with the seasons a lot so they can find work wherever the flowers are growing. 
    In Amalar, wealth is really widely shared. Of course not everyone gets it but honestly there’s not really a big differentiation between wealthy and poor aside from those that are really really really poor to the point they don’t even have homes. 
   In Alkais, a biiiiig tell between the classes is the types of furs people keep warm in. Stupidly wealthy people wear more exotic and more embroidered furs whereas poorer people will wear just kind of whatever they can get their hands on. They less money you have, the more likely you are to be bundled up because what you have is thinner. Wealthier people also tend to wear brighter colors. 
   In Sorestras, education is a very big tell. The more intelligent you are, the wealthier you are, and because of this people tend to really really flaunt their degrees, their souvenirs from travels, things like that. Along with that, it’s also a big show of wealth to have a big library in your home. A wealthy Soresean has likely traveled to every country at least once.
   In Emtiris, colors are also a show of wealth, particularly dark blue and silver. It’s worn a lot by the wealthy. Because of Emtiris’ view on people that give birth, the wealthy are generally women which flock together. It’s a really big tell for wealth when you live with a bunch of other women. 
   In Vousili, no one is wealthy- Vousili works primarily under a bartering system and doesn’t accept the world-wide currency at all. You work for what you have or you have nothing- the only people that could be considered wealthy would be the Aikali in the Court of Queens, but really, they are wealthy in respect and power but nothing else. 
    In Sindora, it all depends on the clan you’re under. In the southern clan, wealth is shown in protection and power. Generally those that work for the Sindor militias are more wealthy, so weaponry and muscle is a sign of wealth. Those that are wealthy generally also have more people with them? They live in larger homes with more people, usually lower class, that are willing to defend them and fight for them in exchange for food and shelter.    The northern clan has an elected official and they are the only one that is wealthy. They don’t really have much more than other people- their house has a treasury in it, and is therefore slightly larger than everyone else’s. Mostly the biggest thing that differs in the way they live is the fact that they hold more responsibility as they aim to create complete equality among everyone on their side. 
37. what do people in your fantasy world/region do for entertainment? are there games that children play? do people go to the theatre?
   Of course there are games children play. I don’t know any specifically, the kids make them up as they go rather than having widespread ones, though I don’t doubt there are a couple that are more known than others. 
   As for other forms of entertainment though, reading is a very big one. A lot of people do that, as well as play sports- don’t ask about them I haven’t actually made much of any of them because I know 0 things about sports and have to figure out all the fun gameplay things. 
    And yes, theaters are very popular. Street plays and various sorts of street entertainment, and concerts too. People really enjoy music. 
    Gardening is something people really enjoy, hiking, playing outside in general, swimming, then there’s inside things like card games and board games.  
39. are there any customs followed at important gatherings (e.g., funerals, weddings, birthdays, etc.)?
   Oh yeah. Weddings aren’t REALLY a thing in most countries in Arantis? It’s an elven tradition mostly that means very little in legality and is more a show of love to one another. It’s common to tattoo the inside of the couples hands with specific symbols that the couples have made- one half for each of them so when they put their hands together it’s a full picture. 
   Funerals in Amalar and Evoles are dealt with pretty simply- people bury their loved ones and mourn, you know, the usual basic shit. In Hana, it’s tradition to have your loved ones cremated and ‘fed to the land’. In Emtiris.. they take that same sentiment farther? It’s widespread tradition to have the dead butchered and spread in composting lots. 
   Birthdays are kinda celebrated case by case? They aren’t really a big deal unless the person thinks they are. The only time they are celebrated is for the gods and for people like Sancor The Great, since every birthday he’s had for the past few centuries has been a blessing given by the people themselves. 
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