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#taehyung fluff
v-hope · a day ago
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»part forty three — service error
»belong
»artist!kim taehyung x heiress!reader
one year to prove you can fend for yourself. one year to keep your parents from making the most important life decision for you. one year to still carry the perfect life for the media whilst carrying a simpler one for yourself... and way less than one year for you to realise you belong in the latter, with that cynical new roommate of yours.
a/n: well this was quite long, wasn’t it? lol i don’t have much to say this time so… hope you enjoy!
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moon-write · 2 days ago
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like you.
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summary:  after finding out taehyung is struggling with his image recently, you tell him why his looks have a far bigger meaning to you. pairing: kim taehyung x reader genre: fluff rating: pg word count: 900+ tags/warnings: taehyung struggles with self image, kissing
a/n: for ❤ anon, i loved the involvement behind your request. thank you for taking the time to send it in. i hope it translates well here <3
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You cling around his waist, resting your chin against his chest while he peppers several kisses against your lips that make him giggle.
“I missed you all week,” you groan longingly against his lips.
“Me too,” he whispers, hiding his face in your neck, “feels nice here.”
You tighten your hold around him, “I saw the live you did this week, with Hobi and Yoongi, it was cute-“
He stiffens a little, nuzzling further into your skin. He doesn’t respond other than that, seeking solace inside of your arms. You smile to yourself, enjoying the feeling of a needy boyfriend.
Combing your fingers back through his hair, you tread lightly, “so, what’s this about not liking how you look?”
He laughs again, brushing his lips against your skin before straightening up. He runs his palms against your cheeks, shrugging. You frown a little, his quiet demeanor since getting to your apartment alerts you to a much more serious undertone. You tug your arms around his waist, urging him to give you a real answer.
His brown eyes blink at you, a window into his secrecy, the dark parts that shine through when he is more silent.
“You can tell me, you know,” you let go of him this time, wrapping your hands around his forearms and rubbing them, “whenever you’re feeling like this.”
Taehyung tries to hide behind a smile, finding your hands and intertwining them with his, “it just slipped out, nothing serious.” He kisses you before moving into your living room. Your fingers stay attached to his until he slips away completely, leaving you to stir in your thoughts alone for a few minutes.
His eyes follow you when you sit next to him, you look at him and the both of you share a hushed chuckle.
“Ah,” he sighs, laying his head back against your sofa, “it all catches up with me sometimes, baseless comments and even the ones that talk about how handsome Kim Taehyung is,” he shakes his head, “so many titles and pictures to keep up with, sometimes I just don’t want to see my face all over the Internet, so why am I going to post selfies that will only add to that?”
You exhale, taking his hand in yours, “you’re always pretty,” you say and it makes him laugh, “to me, you always will be.”
He twists his head, pulling your eyes to him. Wide smile, he’s trying not to blush, “will I?” You know he’s just teasing you now, but there’s still a weight to his words.
“Tae,” you breathe slowly, “it breaks my heart you don’t see yourself as I do.”
He wears a crooked smile this time, wrapping his hand around your cheek, “why, why does this bother you?”
You whine, “because babe, don’t laugh at me,” you pat his chest, allowing him to pinch your cheek before he presses his hand over yours, “I-I’ve always wanted our future children to look like you.”
His breath catches in his throat when he looks at you with glassy eyes, “what-are you serious?”
You feel heartsick, smiling back at Taehyung, stroking his chest and nodding. Before anything else, he pulls your face closer with a fervent need to feel your kiss. He smashes his lips against yours and you have to pull away with a bashful laugh.
Taehyung has you sit in his lap, resting his arms around you, “like what?” He pouts, gently pulling on your fingers. You can’t help but giggle at the childlike expression on his face but he looks at you with all sincerity.
“Okay,” you sigh, settling into him, “these for instance,” you start poking the moles scattered around his face while he fights off a smile, “if our baby-“
“Babies, honey.” He says seriously.
You chuckle, kissing his cheek, “sorry, if our babies have one or more of your moles, I will simply melt. Because whether you like to believe me or not, I think about your cute moles quite frequently, Tae.”
He smirks, flighty eyes looking your way, “even this one?” He points to the one just under his lip.
“Mhm,” you chuckle, shaking your head. He puckers his lips for you to kiss them-it would be a crime not to.
“What about this one?” He leans his head back and pokes his neck, entirely missing where the mole is. You snort, moving his finger to the right spot and nodding when his mischievous eyes find you, “but we’ll save those kisses for later, my love.”
He straightens out and rolls his eyes, lips curled upward.
“You know how much I love your hands,” you pull his up in front of his face, allowing him to watch as you intertwine your fingers with his, “they’re not only pretty but, they make me feel nice,” you kiss his knuckle, “and I can’t help picturing you holding our future baby with these hands.”
Goosebumps grace his skin as he watches you, imagining the future he is certain you will share. If there’s anything that can settle any of his anxieties, it’s talking about settling down and having kids.
“Is that fair? You know my weakness,” he jests, tightening his hold around your hand and mimicking the kiss on your fingers before resting back again “you really want our kids to look like me?”
You chuckle, “I mean, I hope they look a little like me too, but yes.” You brush his bangs back and press a kiss on his forehead, “Kim Taehyung, you are a beautiful man,” you practically sing when your eyes settle on one another again, poking the area right above his heart with a gentle press, “I love this about you most of all.”
He chases after you, planting a big smooch on your lips that forces a belly laugh out of you. His giggle is a heavenly sound; “thank you,” he answers soothingly.
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minyfic · 2 days ago
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hell is empty - JJK, KTH | M
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Series Masterlist
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↣ life has a tendency to throw things your way when you least expect it, when you’re content, and the ominous presence knows exactly how to steer your existence back into the darkness.
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pairing: drug lord!jungkook x reader, hotel owner!taehyung x reader
genre: heavy angst, smut, fluff
warnings/tags: love triangle au, single parent!reader, dad!JK, ex-boyfriend!JK, CEO!taehyung, strong language, explicit smut, drug use, mentions of violence, toxic relationships, near-death experience (will update)
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playlist🎵
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part 01
↳ a small escape from the stress leads you into the arms of a stranger with lots of stories to tell, stories that involve endless touches and caresses, however, the plans you’ve made to never see him again is forgotten; that stranger is your new boss.
part 02
↳ the story of your life is not something you’d like to share, but he finds out eventually and you’re surprised by his reaction, however, an old friend makes a special appearance.
part 03
↳ you aren’t thrilled to see your old friend, like he’d hoped you would be, and you show him exactly why he is unwelcome in your son’s life, however, he isn’t too happy after he hears the stories that you’ve gathered in his absence.
part 04
part 05
part 06
part 07
part 08
part 09
part 10
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POSTING NOVEMBER 2021
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taglist? here
ahh I can’t wait for you guys to read this!!
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⤺Main Masterlist
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© minyfic 2021
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taestefully-in-luv · 10 hours ago
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The Island | KTH (Fourteen)
Summary: You’re just two strangers waking up in a room on a lonely island where a company in the business of love has placed you. They believe that thanks to their in depth research you two are destined soulmates. What happens when your ‘soulmate’ and you want nothing to do with each other but falling in love is the only way to leave?
Pairing: Taehyung x Female reader
Genre: strangers to lovers, very slight enemies to lovers, soulmates au, roommate au, slow burn, fluff, smut, angst, slight crack, and drama.
Word Count: 11.2k
Warnings: swearing, alcohol consumption.
Notes: This chapter took forever for me to write but then suddenly I wrote it very quickly hahaha. Please look forward to the last arc of the story. Enjoy the chapter:) Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist, or send an ask if just want to chat about the stories!:)
Taglist: @ggukkieland @707sblog @peacedreamer14 @dopedreamfireparty @taebae19 @typicalgenzworld @mooniyooni @helenazbmrskai @justinetingball @jpeachytaev @marplest @calling-dips-on-j-hope @lecavivien @fancycollectormoon @mawwnsterr @siredsong @happyhrsme @storms-and-stars-blog @mingi-banana @soeur-de-ame
© taestefully-in-luv
Previous---Next
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“A long, sweet night.”
“A long, sweet night.”
“A long, sweet night.” You decide to repeat out loud. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Well, you know what it could mean. But there’s no way, right? You hold your phone close to your face, your features lit up with the dim blue light. Your eyes squint as you read over his text again and again.
You start to feel the crushing weight of his text, his words causing an undeniable pain in your chest. Your heart beginning to become chipped away piece by piece, each letter of his words cutting at it.
“Now you fight.”
Your mother’s words echo in your mind, her words making you grip your phone tightly in your hand. She’s right. If you don’t fight then you’re running away aren’t you? This is the point. This is the point she is talking about, this is the point where if you do nothing you are now a coward.
“You did the work honey.”
Yes, you did. Growth is forever but you’ve come a long way. You think you have done enough. You are enough. You have done so much and you deserve this, you deserve a happy ending. An ending you have worked for.
You sit at your dining room table, your phone in hand still. You finally click it off and set it down onto the wooden table, it lands with a thump but you don’t even flinch. There isn’t currently anything you can say to him. You have no response. You know that was the end of the conversation. But you know this isn’t the end. It can’t be. It won’t be.
You stand from the table and drag your feet towards the living room and head towards the couch. It’s cold when you plop down onto it, the cushion doing nothing to make you feel comforted. A long, sweet night, huh? Well, you don’t want this sweet night to end.
~~~~~~
“y/n you’ve apologized like 8 times already,” Marcus chuckles, “You don’t have to say sorry anymore.”
“I know, I know.” You bring the croissant to your mouth and take a generous bite. “I really didn’t mean to run out on you though.”
It’s early the next morning, you are treating Marcus to breakfast as a way to apologize for running out on him the night before. He’s kind and understanding as usual.
“So you ever really going to explain?” Marcus murmurs as he takes a sip of his coffee.
“Explain?” You peak over the croissant, your eyes finding his. “Explain what?”
“Come on.” He sets the coffee mug down, “Him. Tell me about the guy who…you know, has your heart or whatever.” Marcus looks down at his hands that are firmly gripping the mug, his cheeks turning a nice, soft pink.
“Oh.” You say, “That.”
Your eyes lower until they are set on the floor, you notice little things like the cracks in the tile. You finally bring the croissant back to the plate on the table, it’s half eaten state taunting you.
“Well,” your eyes find Marcus, “That’s a long story.” You admit softly.
“You gave me a very brief explanation the night I asked you out,” Marcus blinks at you, “But I don’t really understand the…depth…I guess you could say.”
“I kind of told you about the island…” That’s where you decide to start, “But I barely got into my trip to Korea.”
“Right.”
“Well, things didn’t go as smoothly as I had wanted.”
“Are you in love y/n?” Marcus turns redder than a ripe tomato. “You don’t have to an—”
“Yes.” You tell him bluntly. “I am.”
Marcus looks taken aback for a moment, his expression slightly surprised until it’s softening.
“I see. Well, it’s not like I didn’t know. But you two aren’t even talking right?”
“Right.” You admit, your breathing picking up just the slightest. “Barely, anyway.”
“He’s an idiot.” Marcus lets the words spill out between his lips.
“Why is that?”
“I just…I wouldn’t ever let…I would never let you go.” Marcus’s blush deepens as he avoids your eyes now. You can’t help but let a small somewhat pitiful smile paint itself on your lips.
“Well…” you bite down on your bottom lip, “It isn’t that easy.”
“Why not?” Marcus shakes his head. “If he really loved you—”
“Sorry Marcus.” You cut in. “But I think you are overstepping a little bit…”
Marcus scrunches his brows together.
“How so?”
“You don’t know the full story or his perspective.” You tell him, your eyes going back to the floor. “I’m not perfect in this.”
“You are perf—”
“No.” you say sternly, your hard eyes going back to his. “I’m not.”
You push the plate forward on the table, the sound of it gliding against the wood making you shiver.
“You just don’t…you don’t know what I put him through…” you say bitterly, “It wasn’t kind of me, I wasn’t perfect, I wasn’t the best, I wasn’t a lot of things. But I have accepted that and moved forward with that.” You tell him honestly.
“Shouldn’t he try harder…if he loves you?” Marcus raises his voice just the slightest, “If.”
“I don’t know how he feels anymore.” You feel yourself grow tired from this conversation, “But it doesn’t change things.”
“Sorry y/n.” Marcus looks down at his hands again. “I shouldn’t…I shouldn’t have brought this up—”
“I talked to him last night.” You blurt out. “I want to see him. I want to try.”
“But why?” Marcus is growing tired as well. It’s clear he isn’t seeing things the way you do.
“Because he’s my soulmate.”
~~~~~~~
You lay on your stomach, the soft feeling of your bed making you feel so warm. Your phone is in your hands as you struggle to press the ‘call’ button. It shouldn’t be such a big deal, it’s just Yuna yet you are having a hard time.
“Come on y/n.” you whisper to yourself. “Come on.”
You nibble on your lips, waiting for your fingers to find the courage to press the god damn button. It shouldn’t be this hard, no. If it’s meant to be it should be easy.
You press the ‘call’ button and wait not so patiently as it rings and rings on speaker. She’s taking too long, you think. Then finally—
“y/n!!!” Yuna exclaims loudly, her voice booming throughout your small room. “What’s up girl!”
“Yuna…” you hesitate to say her name, “Your birthday…two weeks…”
“Yes?” She tilts her head to the side through the camera. “It is?”
“Is that offer still on the table?” you gulp. “For my flight.”
“Huh? You mean to fly you out here for my b-day?”
“Yeah…” You gulp again, “If it’s okay—”
“Wait!” Yuna yells out with an excited smile, “Jiwoo, get over here!!!!”
“Jiwoo is with you too?” You can’t help the small smile. “You should have said something.”
“Jiwoo! y/n wants to come for my birthday!”
“What???” Jiwoo’s voice is heard, “Eh?”
“y/n..” Yuna points the camera at her mouth, her lips curving into a wide smile. “You really want to come here?”
You nod your head eagerly, a timid expression on your face.
“I do. I want to see you and celebrate you, of course…but I also…” your words get quieter and quieter as you speak.
“You want to see him, don’t you?” Yuna asks softly, “I’m rooting for you.”
“Me too!” Jiwoo says with her fist in the air, “You got this!”
“Guys.” You whine cutely, “Thanks.”
You chat with your friends for a little while longer, you tell them all about Taehyung’s song and his words to you through text.
“It’s definitely not the end girl.” Yuna pouts, “You guys still have so much more to give…”
“It sounds like your mom really came through too…” Jiwoo points out, “She makes a good point.”
“Yeah,” you agree easily, “I just have to figure out where Taehyung stands in all of this.” You look down at the duvet that covers your bed. “I’m going to really put myself out there but there is a chance I will be rejected.” You tell them with a softness in your voice. “He is moving forward and that could really mean without me.”
“I hate to admit it but I think you are right.” Jiwoo murmurs, “He’s really put a lot of effort to move past everything.”
“I know.” You bite down on your lip, just hard enough that you feel something. “I know.”
“But don’t lose you momentum girl!” Yuna cheers you on, “He’s going to lose his mind when he sees you.”
“You think so?” You laugh lightly. “I think I might be the one who loses my mind.”
You swing your legs in the air back and forth until you lay them down on your bed. You nibble on your lips again as you think about it, seeing him. “Yeah. I’m going to lose it.” You laugh again.
“He hasn’t RSVP’d to my party yet…I’ll ask him about it this week when we all go out.” Yuna tells you with a tiny smile on her lips. “I won’t say anything about you coming.”
“Thanks…I’ll tell him myself.”
You finally bid farewell to your friends, clicking the end button on your screen and setting your phone down on your cozy bed. You’re really doing this. This is really happening. Does he really believe you two were just ships in the night? Was your time together really just the equivalent of a long, sweet night?
You roll off your bed and head towards your desk, you pull out your rolling chair and take a seat. Your desk is covered in papers from work, your journal, small decorations, a pile of glittery gel pens and a half drank Starbucks drink. It’s kind of a mess. You decide to clean up a bit and then take your journal and a purple glitter pen and start writing.
“Time and timing is everything in this universe. Everything pans out the way it’s meant to…I do believe that. I have to believe that. I have to have that kind of faith. But I can’t just stand by and let the universe do all the work, can I? I should put some level of effort too…right? Is time in my hands?”
You stop writing, the pen staying still, bleeding its purple ink into your paper. Is time in your hands? You bring the pen to your lips and chew on the end, your teeth digging into the plastic.
“Is it?” you repeat out loud.
~~~~~
Wow, you haven’t felt this nervous in a while. Your nerves are absolute killers right now. They are shaking you to your death and throwing you over a cliff, they are slapping you in the face repeatedly, they are making you feel so completely helpless.
Your hand trembles furiously as you hold your stupid phone, your whole body is vibrating in terror. You fly out in the morning and you haven’t told Taehyung that you are going to Korea yet. He has no idea that you two will be breathing the same air soon. You try your hardest to take a few deep breaths but you fall short, your breathing quick and sharp instead.
The boys promised not to say anything and you’re counting on it. Jimin is on the verge of tears from his excitement, he’s been waiting for you to visit for the past year. Jungkook is anticipating your arrival as well, his bunny grin imprinted in your mind when you told them you for sure were going. The rest of the guys cheered and sent you a million texts about how happy they are. Everyone knows about your upcoming arrival…everyone but him.
After staring at his message thread for what seems like an eternity you finally decide to chicken out. You click your phone off and throw it on your sofa, it slides against the cushions and somehow falls between the cracks. But you don’t care. You’re happy your phone is out of sight.
You decide to take a walk in the city, the evening air is brisk and the sky is glowing in pinks and purples. You tug your jean jacket closer together as you walk through a cool breeze, it feels nice actually. Like you can breathe again. Your phone is still lost between your couch cushions and you couldn’t feel happier about it.
You decide to stroll around until you find yourself at Cozy Coffee, the shop making you feel welcomed and at home. You head to the counter and order a latte, the warm drink making you melt into some slightly pathetic puddle. Only pathetic because at the end of the day you know you are just avoiding what you must do. But somehow you approve. You just want to enjoy this evening before your trip to Korea. You have no idea what this trip might hold. You have no idea of the experiences you will encounter. You just really have no idea.
You sip on your latte in the corner of the shop, your mind starting to ease as you down your drink. Are you really prepared for this? Are you ready to face him? To be honest, you haven’t even thought about what you might say…you just know the first step is seeing him. Face to face.
You finally head back to your apartment, the sky now lit up by the illuminating moon, guiding you on your path. You feel relaxed again, the moon giving you peaceful energy. You know this feeling is only temporary so you try to embrace it.
Your apartment is chilly inside, the air matching the air from outside. You head towards the thermostat and turn it up a few degrees. You rub your arms in attempt to warm yourself as you head towards you sofa, you look at it with disdain as you remember your phone hiding in its cushions.
You take a deep breath and lift one of the cushions up and search for the damned thing. Your hand finds it and you throw it on the other side of the sofa as you place the cushion back in its place. You finally take a seat and reach for your phone, you take another deep breath as you click it on, seeing you have a missed called from Jimin and also your mother.
You decide to call your mom first, you video chat her right away, waiting for her to answer.
“Hi sweetie.” Your moms voice comes through your phones speaker. “I tried calling a little while ago.”
“Sorry…” you mumble lamely. “What’s up?”
“I know you leave for your trip tomorrow and just wanted to see how you were doing.”
Your mouth opens a little…like you are going to speak but really it’s just from the pleasant surprise you are feeling from your mothers words. The past couple of weeks you two have been chatting more and more.
“I feel…” you feel your body tense, you try to take a deep breath but it feels mostly impossible. “Mom.” Your bottom lip begins to tremble, “I’m scared.”
“Things like this are scary honey.” She breathes out, her eyes soft and on you. “But you aren’t living life unless you are taking leaps of faith.”
“There is a strong chance he won’t want me.” You tell her, your breaths shaky. “Can I handle that?”
“Honey…” Your mom closes her eyes for a second before they’re back on you. “You can handle anything. I believe that. I know in the past…it might not have seemed that way but you’ve grown so much. You are so strong y/n. And I know you want to make things work…” she pauses as you try to calm your breathing, you are trying not to cry. “But…” your mother continues, “But you are complete on your own too. And you will find some epic love or whatever no matter with who. You deserve it so therefore you will have it.”
“He’s my love, mom.” You finally feel your eyes wet with tears. “He’s been my biggest supporter this whole journey and he doesn’t even know it.”
“Well y/n.” your mom exhales through her nose as she smiles for you, “It sounds like you have an important mission for this trip. I hope you really convey your feelings and most importantly…I hope you listen as well. Really listen. Listen to his thoughts and feelings too and be considerate.” She softly advises you. “Communication really is key.”
“I know…” you sniffle.
“Did you know…” your mother hesitates to continue, she exhales a long breath before setting her lips in a firm line. “Your father and I were close to divorcing around the time you were born.”
“Wait what?” you blink at the screen, feeling caught off guard.
Your mother slowly nods her head and closes her eyes.
“We just…didn’t feel like we were on the same page anymore. I didn’t know what he was thinking anymore and he had no idea what was going on in my mind either.”
You pull your brows together as you listen intently, your mom’s words making you feel a little anxious.
“We just didn’t click anymore, it felt like. We were struggling financially at the time and you were…an unexpected surprise. It truthfully further strained our marriage…” she tells you honestly. “But we loved you so much. It was the only thing holding us together.”
“How did you work things out?” you ask quietly.
“We talked. Really talked. I remember we went out on the patio after we put you girls to sleep and we just finally looked at one another and knew we had to have…you know, an important discussion.” She takes a moment to breathe evenly. “I finally let it all out…I told him about how lonely I had been feeling, I told him how I missed him…he was working a lot you know…I told him I just wasn’t happy anymore.”
You feel your heart ache a bit at her words, you never knew this about your parents.
“He ended up crying…nodding his head over and over and telling me he knows how I feel. Because he was feeling it too. The disconnect was hurting the both of us.”
“I had no idea…” you admit, still sniffling. “You and dad always seemed so…okay, all the time.”
“We didn’t want you girls to ever worry. Your father and I have shared bumps in the road but we found a way to cope. We expressed ourselves honestly, the vulnerability creating a closeness I cannot even begin to describe.”
“So you are saying…me and Taehyung—”
“You need to share everything…really everything. This is how you truly move forward.”
“Thanks for sharing that stuff about you and dad…”
“I want to help any way I can honey.” She smiles a smile you rarely see on her, it brings you automatic comfort. “Get some rest and let me know when you land. Goodnight.”
You agree and say your goodbyes to your mom as you both hang up. You sit on your couch still sniffling as you think deeply about what your mother shared with you.
After a few minutes you decide to clean your face with your sleeve and call Jimin back. The ringing only goes on for a second or two before he’s picking up.
“He isn’t going.” Jimin huffs on the video chat. “Said he isn’t in the mood to party.”
“Huh?” you blink at Jimin a few times before you’re realizing. “Oh.”
“You need to tell him you’re coming then maybe he will change his mind…”
“Yeah y/n!” You hear Jungkook yell over the phone, “tell him already! It’s killing me keeping this from him.”
“Well, first of all, hi guys.” You wave at the camera. “Second…” you chew on your lips. A horrible habit of yours, you know. “I will tell him when I get there.” You mumble.
“Oh my god, are you fucking kidding?” You hear Jungkook groan. “Just do it now.”
“Chill!” Jimin scolds Jungkook, “But he’s kind of got a point y/n…”
“Trust me…just let me tell him when I get there. Also, Jimin.”
“Yeah?”
“You’re sure it’s fine that I stay with you?” you look into his eyes through the camera and you see his thick lips curve into a wonderful grin.
“Of course my bff.”
“I want to stay over here too…” Jungkook grumbles, he finally shows himself on screen. “We can all have like a …slumber party or whatever.” His eyes slide to the side as he grows red with embarrassment.
“A slumber party?” Jimin begins to tease, “What are you, a 12 year old girl?”
“I happen to like the slumber party idea.” You nod your head approvingly.
“Seriously though y/n.” Jungkook’s eyes find yours. “Tell him you’re coming.”
“I will, I will.” You wave him off, “I’ll send a text before I fall asleep or something. Happy?”
“Yeah, a bit.” He smirks at you. “Right, Jimin?”
“Yeah.” Jimin grins again, “I’m really hoping for the best, girl.”
“Me too guys…me too.”
~
You double check to make sure you’ve packed everything for your week long trip, you then triple check just to be sure. You feel anxious again but somehow you feel okay at the same time. You think the talk you had with your mom kind of helped you.
You had no idea she and your father shared such “bumps in the road” as she had mentioned. Is talking it out really such a magical solution? Will you and Taehyung really be able to share everything…like everything, everything?
You take one huge deep breath as you pull your phone out…you find Taehyung’s name and begin writing your text.
y/n 9:04pm
I’ll be in korea for Yuna’s birthday. Will I see you there?
You quickly click your phone off and toss it to your bed and squeal. Yes, squeal. You finally did it. Now you wait for a response.
~
It’s 6 am and you are sitting on your flight waiting for takeoff, you stare at your screen as you see the fact that Taehyung read your message several hours ago. He left you on read. You could honestly throw up. You’re anxious all over again.
~~~~~~~
“You belong here!” Jimin is squeezing you so hard it’s almost crushing your very bones. “Just move here already.” He whines into your neck as he continues to embrace you. “Please.”
“My turn…” Jungkook huffs, “I said my turn!”
“Patience, brat.” Jimin teases as he leans away from you, his hands still on your arms. “So how was your flight?”
“You’re really going to try to have a whole conversation with her before I get to hug her? Really dude?” Jungkook shoves Jimin to the side before his arms wrap around you. You return his hug with your own arms circling his tiny waist.
“You missed me, Jungkook?” you inhale his scent, he smells of fresh laundry.
“Whatever.” He grumbles with a toothy grin. “So,” he pulls away from you and gestures you to come inside Jimin’s place. “How was the flight?”
“Long as hell. I’m glad to finally be here.” You walk through, setting your luggage in his walkway. “And I am so damn hungry.”
“Well, we can definitely order some food.” Jimin cheeses, “How does that sound?”
“Sounds perfect.” You take your shoes off and walk further into Jimin’s home. “Smells good in here.” You comment nonchalantly.
“I lit some candles before you got here.” Jimin scratches the back of his neck, “Wasn’t sure if you would like the scent so I blew them out.”
“No, no. I like it.” You find your way into his living room, his black leather sofas taking up much of the space. You find a spot near the window and take a seat.
“So, did you even tell Taehyung? We saw him earlier today and he didn’t say anything so I am assuming you didn’t tell him.” Jungkook says with a serious tone.
“Actually I did.” You pick at your nails, but raise your head as to not look bothered.
“Wait…really? He didn’t say anything?” Jimin questions with the tilt of his head.
“He left me on read.” You say as plainly as possible. “Guess he doesn’t want to see me.”
“He…he left you on…” Jungkook looks over at Jimin, their eyes meeting with curiosity. “But he….?”
“Yup.” You go back to picking at your nails, trying your best once again to look unbothered.
“Well!” Jimin claps his hands together, “What should we eat?”
A few hours pass, night time quickly approaching. You, Jimin and Jungkook wait for Yuna and Jiwoo to arrive at Jimin’s place. You three drinking soju, giggling while resting on the sofas when you hear knocking on Jimin’s front door.
Jimin hurries to answer when you hear the voices of your two friends echoing lightly throughout the place. Yuna appears first, she rushes to your spot on the couch, jumping on you and quickly embracing you. You can’t help but laugh out loud, inhaling her sweet, sweet scent as you two hug one another. Jiwoo joins you both by sitting next to you and wrapping her arms around you.
“H-Hi Jiwoo.” Jungkook quickly stands up when Jimin is coming to his side and nudging his shoulder.
“And Yuna.” He reminds him with his teasing voice.
“Right.” Jungkook clears his throat. “And Yuna. Hi.”
“Hey.” Jiwoo replies cooly, “You guys started drinking without us?”
“You guys took too long!” You slur happily. “We only have had a little, little.” You show her how little with your pointer finger and thumb.
“Sure Miss Drunkie.” Jiwoo laughs, “Yuna I think you can let her breathe now.”
“One more minute!” Yuna rubs her face on your shoulder as she continues to hug you. “Missed my y/n!”
“Yuna!” you giggle. “You have 5 more seconds!”
“Fine.” Yuna pouts dramatically, pulling off you. She sits on your other side and smiles up at you. Her hair is still a pale pink and her eyeshadow is a glittery art work. You look over at Jiwoo with her jet black hair, it’s gotten even longer.
“It’s good to see you guys.” You chirp, “And oh my god, two more days until your birthday!” you point at Yuna excitedly.
“I can’t believe your dad is letting you have your birthday party at the Mondrian.” Jimin takes a seat on the other sofa with Jungkook. “That place is so nice.”
“I’m spoiled.” Yuna sings, “So spoiled!”
“At least she admits it.” Jiwoo deadpans.
You start giggling some more, reaching for another shot of soju. You down it back and smack your lips in satisfaction.
“Yummy!” you sway into Yuna and Jiwoo. “You guys want to play a game?”
“Like what?” Jungkook asks. “I think Hobi said he wants to swing by.”
“Oh! Yay.” You chirp happily, “Can the rest of the guys not make it?”
“We’re meeting with everyone tomorrow Miss impatient.” Jimin takes his own shot of soju.
“But I want to see everyone now.” You jut your lip out. “Jungkook!” you stand up and stumble to where he’s seated. “Call em and tell em to come here. Now.” You plop down next to him. “Pretty please.” You lean into his shoulder and smile for him. Jungkook turns nice and rosy before he’s lightly pushing you away.
“You have to wait y/n.” he reminds you, avoiding your intense gaze.
“Jungkookie.” You whine, “I said pretty please.”
“Wow, she is drunk.” Jiwoo chuckles, “I love it.”
“Same.” Jimin’s eyes turn to crescents as he grins. “She is so…free.” He says quieter, “She’s changed so much.”
“Jungkookie!” You lean into his space again, your big eyes blinking up at him over and over until he’s groaning.
“Fine!” he throws his hands up, “Who should we call first?”
You end up calling the rest of the guys and chatting for a while, your drunken state only worsening. But it’s nothing but a good time. Jimin ends up tucking you in his kind size bed, he brushes the hair out of your face and watches you fondly as you snore in your sleep. He’s so proud of you. Jungkook walks into the bedroom as well and he shares a knowing look with Jimin and Jimin’s smile fades into a frown.
“Want to have a beer on the patio?” Jungkook nods towards outside the room.
“Sure.” Jimin takes one last look at you before he’s leaving you to sleep. Jimin and Jungkook walk past the sofa where Yuna and Jiwoo are knocked out, cuddling each other for warmth. They make their way outside and take their seats on the patios chairs.
“So.” Jungkook pinches his brows together, “He didn’t say anything to us.”
“I know.” Jimin’s frown only deepens. “He’s probably taking his time to process her arrival, you know?”
“Is it that simple?” Jungkook brows pull together even further. “He’s doing so well and maybe he…”
“He just needs time Jungkook. I know him.”
“I know him too Jimin and he acted like she didn’t reach out to him? That’s not…I don’t know, concerning to you?”
Jimin stares straight ahead, bringing his beer to his lips. He takes a few gulps before facing Jungkook.
“Yeah.” He admits. “It is.”
~
The next morning is horrific, the hangover you have is probably literally killing you. Your head is absolutely pounding and your body feels weak. But you have to admit the sheets in this bed feel amazing so you are tempted to stay here forever—or at least until this killer hangover disappears.
“y/n. It’s like 2pm.” You hear Jungkook’s voice hammer in your ears. “Get up!”
“Nooooooo.” You groggily whine, pulling the sheets up over your head. “Want to stay here forever.”
“Brought you some water girl.” Jimin’s angelic voice is heard, he’s gently pulling the sheets down and exposing your tired as hell face.
“Drink it slowly.” He sweetly advises, “And here’s some pain killers.” He hands you two pills and you eye him up before taking them gratefully.
“Thanks…” you murmur. “Holy hell, soju is no joke.”
“Yeah.” Jungkook laughs. “But you hung in there!”
“Where are Yuna and Jiwoo?” you pop the pills in your mouth and drink back some water. The refreshing beverage already making you feel a little more alive.
“They left hours ago!” Jungkook continues to laugh, “You slept through it.”
“Damn.” You grumble, “Wait!” you suddenly raise your head up. “Aren’t the guys getting here at 3 today?”
“Yes.” Jimin smiles, “So maybe you want to shower….and get ready.”
“O-Okay.” You agree, you pull the sheets back off your body and rise from the bed, the room starts to slightly spin and you whine. “I am not drinking this much ever again!”
“You say that now. But Yuna’s party is open bar so.” Jungkook winks.
You gag just at the thought of drinking more alcohol. You drag your feet towards Jimin’s bathroom and your hand reaches for the shower knob and you turn it on, letting the water warm up.
“Okay, I’ll get ready! You two shoo.”
The shower is exactly what you needed, the warm water making you feel relaxed and comfortable. You’re grateful that Jimin is letting you stay at his place for a whole week…you really wish you saw them more often. You really wish you lived here sometimes.
You admittedly love it here…you enjoy your life back home too, don’t get it wrong but something about this place that feels so fitting.
“Almost done in there?” You hear Jimin softly knock on the bathroom door. “Jin says they’re on the way.”
“Be right out!” you call back out. “Almost done.”
You take a look in the mirror and you think to yourself about how nicely you clean up. You got some ripped jeans and a black long sleeve shirt, some light make up and two clips in your hair. You look cute as hell actually.
“Okay. Time to see my friends.” You give yourself an awkward thumbs up in the mirror before you’re chuckling. “Should I practice my Korean on them?” you ask out loud. Then you nod your head and give yourself another thumbs up before you step out of the bathroom, walk through Jimin’s room and enter the living room.
“About time lady!” Jungkook snickers, “What the hell were you doing in there?”
“You shouldn’t ask a girl that!” Jimin swats Jungkook’s arm. “Feeling better y/n?”
“Loads!” you walk towards them and find a place on the couch. “Are they almost here?”
Suddenly, there’s excessive knocking on the front door. You three whip your heads in the direction and you jump up in delight. You race Jungkook to the door and swing it open and as soon as you do so many arms are reaching out to hold you.
“y/n!!!!” Hobi is the first to wrap his arms around you so tightly, he sways your bodies back and forth. “I missed you so much.” He finally lets go when Jin is automatically pulling you into his chest.
“Your favorite one is here now.” He jokes as he squeezes your smaller body.
“Uh have you guys ever stayed up all night on the phone sharing writing tips for hours? I don’t think so.” You hear Namjoon say teasingly. “Come here you.” He’s dragging your arm until your body is being engulfed by his. “About time you visited.”
“Hey, we don’t have any say on y/n’s timing to come here. What matters is that she is here now.” Yoongi stands to the side, waiting for his turn. “But I would like a hug too.” He smiles that gummy smile and you giggle. You leave Namjoon to give Yoongi a tight embrace, he rocks your bodies back and forth before he’s letting go altogether.
“Good to see you y/n.” he says.
“You too. All of you.” You look at the boys, “You have no idea how much I missed you guys. Talking through the phone just isn’t enough, is it?”
“You could always move here.” Hobi offers with a teasing smile. “But you know that already.”
“She does know that!” Jungkook yells over the chatter. “But she’s a scaredy cat.”
“Hey.” You pout towards Jungkook. “Am not.”
“Then move here.” Jimin gives you his best sly smile, “You can live with me.”
“As tempting as that sounds,” you giggle, walking into the kitchen with the guys following behind you.
“Ah y/n, I think your phone is ringing.” Jin points towards the device on the counter. “Should I answer it?”
You raise your brows and head to the counter to see who is calling. Marcus.
“Oh hold on, let me take this.” You announce to everyone before answering your phone,
“Hello?”
“Hey. Just wanted to check in on you.” You hear Marcus’s raspy voice on the other end. “How is it?”
“Good, good. The flight was good. I’ve just been hanging with everyone. Actually I’m with everyone now…can we talk later?” you mumble into the phone.
“Oh.” Marcus chuckles, “Sure. Call me later?”
“Yeah.” He hears the smile in your voice. “I’ll call you later.” And then you’re quickly hanging up, bringing the phone back to the counter. It’s oddly quiet in the house.
“What?” You ask with big eyes, blinking at everyone. They all give you a curious look before you scoff.
“He’s just a friend.” You say sternly. “So stop whatever ideas your guys are all getting in your silly little heads.”
“Just friends….” Namjoon nods his head slowly. “Right.”
“I’m serious.”
“She’s ‘serious’ mhm.” Jungkook nods his head mockingly. “Right.”
“I am!” you groan, “Seriously.”
“She said they’re just friends, guys.” Yoongi puts a hand on your shoulder, “Right?”
“Right.”
“Right.” Jin nods his head quickly.
“Right.” Hobi gives you a thumbs up before he’s giving you one of his signature grins.
“Well,” Jimin comes up to you and reaches for your hand and squeezing it, “y/n is here guys. Let’s make the most of this week. Tomorrow is Friday, aka Yuna’s extravagant birthday ball and we have a lot of catching up to do.”
~~~~~~~
You lay in bed after a long day of hanging with your friends, your phone up to your face as you stare at the screen that mocks you. He read your message and just…never replied. You are trying your best to feel okay but now that you lay alone you start to feel the loneliness creep up. Does he not want to see you? Is he afraid to see you?
You exit your message threads and go to your photos…you find the selfies from your date and you stare and stare at the screen. He’s so strikingly handsome. You feel your chest tighten as you continue to gaze at the photos, you feel your heart squeeze in your chest. Suddenly there is knocking on the bedroom door and Jimin is walking in…you’re quick to click your phone off and pretend you just weren’t staring at the man you love.
“Hey.” Jimin greets you softly. “You still awake?”
“Yeah…” you turn over to face him, you scoot over and pat the spot next to you and he takes the invitation to slide in the sheets.
“How are you doing?” Jimin asks suddenly, his tone is warm and comforting and you almost burst into tears at his question but instead you clear your throat and nod your head a few times.
“Good.” you lie.
“y/n…” Jimin breathes out slowly, “Really. How are you?” his eyes are full of fucking pity and it’s driving you to feel like a god damn burden.
“I said I’m good.” But your voice cracks, and he’s already pulling you into his chest.
“y/n…” he holds you tight as you try to even out your breathing. “I talked to him today.”
“He’s…” you hiccup, “He’s going to come. I know it.” You say into Jimin’s chest. “I know it. Even if he doesn’t reply to me, he’s going to go to the party.”
“…He…said he isn’t going.” Jimin tells you regretfully. “He seemed pretty serious.”
“No.” you sniffle now, “He’s going.” You feel your eyes sting as you try to blink back growing tears. “He’s going.” You repeat pathetically.
“Okay, okay.” Jimin begins rubbing your back. “Okay.”
“I just need a chance Jimin.” You hiccup again, “A chance to show him that I…” your breathing picks up even more, your sharp breaths concerning Jimin.
“Just relax…” He continues to rub your back, “I’m here.”
“Jimin…” your voice cracks again but this time because of a quiet sob that finally breaks through. “I miss him so much.” You cry.
“I know girl.” His soft voice making you feel comforted. “I’m holding onto hope too.” He tells you, his tender tone only making you cry harder.
“Fuck…” you sob into his chest. “I miss him so fucking much.”
You eventually fall asleep in Jimin’s arms after you spent some time crying it out. Jimin has a hard time knocking out, his mind too busy with thoughts of you and Taehyung.
~
“You look absolutely gorgeous.” Jimin has stars in his eyes as he looks at you, “Right, Jungkook?” he hits Jungkook’s arm and Jungkook awkwardly clears his throat.
“Yeah, I guess.”
“Thanks guys.” You tug on the material over your stomach and frown. “Are you sure though? This dress looks fine on me?”
“Absolutely. Gorgeous.” Jimin repeats. “Stunning.”
“He’s right.” Jungkook shrugs. “You do look nice. Or whatever.”
“Fine, I guess I will have to believe you two. You also look nice.” You gesture towards the two men in suits. “This is about to be super fancy isn’t it?” you pinch your brows together as you chuckle. “Yuna really went all out.” You look up at the building. The Mondrian is a beautiful hotel, very luxurious. You three step through the rotating doors and enter the main building.
“She can go all out when she’s got daddy’s money.” Jungkook big doe eyes look around him, he’s in awe of the hotel, that much is clear.
“Should we find the conference room and find the bar and you know, start drinking?” your eyes scan around, noticing all the people dressed up walking to the elevators. “She said it’s on the 3rd floor right?”
“What happened to no more drinking?” Jungkook nudges your shoulder. “But hell yeah, let’s go.”
“I second that.” Jimin links arms with you and Jungkook, leading the way towards the elevators.
You three find the conference room and your eyes grow twice their size. This room is huge, many tables set up, people dancing to loud music, the bar is poppin with lines of people waiting for a free drink, it’s beyond what you imagined.
“y/n!!!” You hear the high pitched voice of no other than Yuna. She looks so beautiful it actually feels blinding. Her deep green gown, her pale pink hair, her subtle yet gorgeous make up. She looks like a fairy princess. Jiwoo follows closely behind, a bold, blue dress with her hair pinned up. She looks like a model out of a magazine.
“You look amazing.” Yuna points at you, her eyes full of genuine surprise. “Like, what the heck?” she looks you up and down, her hands motioning towards your body.
“This dress is so…” She blinks at you repeatedly, “Do a turn for me!”
You giggle, feeling a bit shy but you do a little twirl. Yuna pretends to faint.
“AND IT’S BACKLESS?! You’re killing me!” she yells out dramatically. “Jiwoo are you seeing this?!” “You do look so pretty.” Jiwoo chuckles. “Yuna, can you ever compliment someone more normally?”
“You like the way I compliment.” Yuna raises her head up. “You know it’s true.”
“You literally pretended to have a heart attack when you saw me tonight.” Jiwoo deadpans, “who does that?”
“Girls who recognize real beauty.” Yuna states matter of fact. “And girl, you are beautiful.”
“Shush.” Jiwoo’s cheeks begin to heat up, you can’t help but giggle at the interaction.
“You both look lovely.” You tell them sincerely. “And happy birthday Yuna.” You lean in for a hug, its tight and quick and you’re pulling away much faster than Yuna’s liking,
“Thanks girl.” She smiles for you. “You really do look so nice y/n…are you hoping to see T—”
“Yuna.” Jiwoo warns, “Let’s get a drink?”
“Yeah, let’s do that.” You say, “Where did Jimin and Jungkook go?” you finally notice they’re absence.
“Probably to their table. With the rest of the guys.” Yuna tells you while she starts leading you girls towards the open bar. “Shots?” She smirks towards you two. “It’s my birthday so you can’t say no.”
“Fine. But you’re trying to kill me.” You laugh, “I’m going easy tonight.”
“One shot.” Yuna pouts cutely, “But you!” She points at Jiwoo. “You have to take two with me.”
“Fine by me.” Jiwoo shrugs. We both know between the two of us, it’s me who’s taking care of you and your drunk ass tonight.”
“Counting on it.” Yuna blows Jiwoo a kiss.
“Ugh, let’s do this.”
You girls wait for the shots, taking them quickly once they’re in your hands. The burn is exactly what you needed to loosen up. You’re nervous tonight. You’re anticipating Taehyung’s arrival. Yes, he never replied to you. Yes, he told Jimin he wasn’t coming. But you feel it in your bones…he’s coming tonight. He wants to see you as bad as you want to see him. At least that’s what you are hoping for.
“You’re too good of a dancer Hobi, I can’t keep up with you!” you whine loud enough for him to hear you over the music.
“You’re doing great!” he tells you, his hands on your waist. “Just move to the music girl!”
“Easier said than done.” You laugh loudly, “Hey, what time is it?”
“Hm..” Hobi lifts his left wrist to look at his watch. “Almost 12.” He tells you.
It’s almost 12? And he’s still not here? No, you know he’s coming. He has to. He will. You feel your chest close in on you, and your heart thumping wildly. You know you’re going to see him tonight. You know it. You excuse yourself and head towards the doors of the conference room. You walk past Jimin who suddenly frowns as he realizes you’re heading out the doors, he tries calling out for you but you ignore him. He doesn’t think Taehyung is going to show up.
But you know.
You stand in the hallway in front of the elevators for who knows how long, you shift from one foot to the other as you wait anxiously. The party is still going hard, but you’ve tuned it all out. The only thing you hear is Taehyung’s deep voice. It plays in your mind, him saying something as simple as your name. You wish you were hearing it for real. You hear the ding of the arriving elevator and go rigid.
The sharp intake of breath your weak body just sucked in has you feeling tense. You knew you were going to see him…you knew this was going to happen but here you are, trying so hard to even out your breathing as you await his arrival. No amount of journaling could calm you, relax you, give you a sense of peace. No amount of alcohol could make you feel looser.
“Jimin just told me…” Yuna catches up to you, out of breath. “y/n…” your name leaves her mouth with pity, “I don’t think he’s going to come.”
“He will.” You say, standing your ground outside the elevator. “He will.”
“At least wait inside…” She gestures towards the conference room, where the party is. “It looks lonely waiting out here.”
Your eyes fall to the tiled floor, the shiny cream colored squares showing a vague reflection of yourself. Maybe it is lonely.
“Okay…” You turn around to face Yuna, a tired smile working itself on your lips. “Let’s dance?”
“Yeah.” She offers a drunk smile.
Then you hear the elevator doors opening, you whip your head in the direction of the doors but inside is only unrecognizable faces.
“Let’s go.” You tell her, trying your best not to feel so disappointed.
You both walk into the room again, the music blaring and the sight of sweaty bodies grinding against one another.
“I need a drink.” You take a deep breath before heading towards the bar. You find yourself downing shot after shot.
“Hey, slow down.” Jungkook’s voice cuts in through the booming music. “Don’t want you to like, throw up.”
“Hey Jungkook…?” You hand him your drink, getting it away from you. “You’re always straight up…”
“Don’t do this.” Jungkook warns you softly, “Not now.”
“Is Taehyung—”
“Is Taehyung…what?” A new voice cuts in, a voice you know all too well. It’s deep, deeper than the fucking ocean. It’s smooth, its charming, You feel your breath get caught in your throat as your ears process the voice they heard. You struggle for a moment, but you finally tilt your head to the side and your eyes narrow at the tall figure.
“Am I what?” he repeats.
Finally, a small gasp leaves your lips as your eyes widen in genuine shock. You knew he would come tonight yet somehow you are as surprised as Jungkook next to you. You don’t notice but Jungkook nods his head towards Taehyung and walks away, leaving you two.
“T-Taehyung…?” you blink over and over, not believing your eyes. “What are you—”
“I’m here to see you.” He tells you bluntly. “And my god woman, you are a sight for sore eyes.” He all but whispers, his expression stiff as he eyes you.
“Taehyung.” You release the shakiest breath as you repeat his name.
“Hi y/n.”
You straighten yourself, trying to show off the fact that you aren’t totally drunk. You look all around the slightly spinning room and search for faces you know. Finally, your eyes lock with Jimin’s. He looks worried but he quickly tries to smile for you. You look panicked to say the least. The room is crowded, loud, hot and sweaty. But all of that fades away when the scent of Taehyung fills your nostrils. You take a second to notice he has stepped forward until he is right in front of you.
“y/n.” he says your name as a command. Your frantic eyes find his and you feel the whole room freeze.
Taehyung studies you, his focused eyes scanning every inch of your body. You watch as he lifts a hand and reaches behind you. Then suddenly you are feeling light fingertips tracing your down your spine. His fingers barely skid across your exposed skin and you slowly close your eyes at the contact. Your breathing slowing as well.
Taehyung’s fingers glide back up your back, his touch so light like he almost wasn’t even touching you. His serious expression beginning to soften as he brings his hand back to his own body.
“This dress is like the one you wore on the island.”
“You like it.” You whisper.
“Yes.” He admits, you two gaze into one another’s eyes until he finally looks off to the side.
“Should we talk?” he asks you, “Or are you too drunk?”
“No, no.” you shake your head, “Let’s talk.”
Taehyung looks you over one last time before nodding his head and turning around to head towards the exit. You gulp as you watch his broad back…you hurry to follow him.
Taehyung glances behind him and he exhales a long breath when he sees you rushing after him, he looks forward again until he’s reaching the elevators.
“Come on.” He gestures towards the open elevators.
You walk quickly, reaching him and the elevator before you’re going inside. He follows you in.
“Taehyung—”
“Wait until we are downstairs.” He cuts you off softly.
“Okay…”
The ride is silent. But your mind is as loud as shrieking ghosts, ghosts that want to haunt and traumatize you. You finally hear the ding, signaling your arrival to the first floor.
“Come on.” He tells you, his voice booming throughout the small space. “Follow me.”
You do as he says, you follow him. Truthfully, you would follow him anywhere. Even to the ends of the Earth.
“Yes, hi.” Taehyung begins speaking to the front desk lady. “I want a room, please.”
Wait, a room? You’d follow him anywhere but a room?
“Taehyung—”
“It’s just so we have privacy.” He assures you, not even looking in your direction.
“It’s expensive…” you slur. “We can just talk outside.”
“It’s fine.” He hands the lady his card, “Which floor?”
“6th floor.” She informs him with a bright smile.
Your eyes find your shoes, somehow they’re more fascinating than anything else suddenly. Then you feel the warmth of Taehyung’s hand wrapping itself around yours, his fingers struggling to intertwine with your own. But then you finally receive the hint and allow him to hold your hand.
“You’re drunk, y/n.” he says, voice laced in disappointment, “I’m sorry for making you wait.” He leads you back to the elevators. You two walk inside and he let’s go of your hand, he runs his fingers through his smooth hair and sighs out in defeat.
“You should just get some sleep.”
“I want to talk.” You slur again, “I have…I have so much to say.”
“We’ll see.” His low voice rumbles. “We’ll see.”
The ride up to the 6th floor is long, but you finally make it out of that small space and stumble towards your room.
Taehyung unlocks the door and you make your way inside…the view is amazing. The city is quite the sight.
“Take your shoes off, I’m sure your feet hurt.” Taehyung loosens up his tie.
“They do.” You admit in a whine.
Taehyung takes a seat on the edge of the made bed and watches you with intense eyes as you get comfortable.
“C’mere.” He pats the spot next to him.
Suddenly you become very shy. You haven’t felt this kind of tension in so long. His eyes boring into every inch of your skin, his eyes trailing along your body and making you feel exposed. Making you feel naked.
“Okay.” You nod your head slowly, “I can do that.” You take your time walking to him, sitting next to him on the bed.
“What is it you want to tell me?” Taehyung gets straight to the point.
“Uh….umm…”
“Words y/n.” he closes his eyes for a brief second, then his sight is back on you. “Why did you want to see me?”
“Taehyung.” Saying his name feels so…exhilarating. You’ve avoided it for so long but now you can say it and it feels like freedom and it tastes so, so sweet on your tongue.
“I don’t know where to start.” You admit. “I didn’t rehearse…”
For the first time tonight Taehyung’s face splits into a small smile as he quietly chuckles.
“Rehearse?”
“Yeah…I didn’t practice what to say.” You slur cutely.
“Just let the words flow naturally.” His eyes light up in slight amusement. “What is it you want to tell me?”
“I miss you.” You blurt out, your hand immediately going to cover your mouth as if you said curse words.
“You miss me?” he repeats your words, “Is that so?”
You slowly lower your hand that covers your mouth and nod your head.
“Yes.” You close your eyes and tilt your head back. “This past year…”
“What about it?”
“This past year I…”
“You?” Taehyung raises a curious brow, “You what?”
“I think I’ve become better.” You slur out your words, “I’m better now.”
“Yeah?” Taehyung asks, his voice low. “I’m happy for you.”
“Taehyung.” You lower your head and open your eyes. They stare straight ahead. “Can we make this work?” your words jumble together as you try to speak. Those last shots sneaking up on you.
“I’ve decided that this conversation is going to have to wait.” Taehyung stands from the bed, “I’m going to get you some water.”
You watch as he walks towards a counter and pours you a glass of water, he comes back and places the cup in your hands. “Drink.” He says softly. “Please.”
“O-Okay.” You bring the cup to your lips, your eyes never leaving his as you gulp back some of the liquid.
“Good girl.” He whispers. “Now, I want you to get some sleep.”
“Are you sleeping with me?” you hiccup.
“No.” he tells you with a tender voice, “But I will stay here until you fall asleep, how about that?”
“Okay….”
Taehyung watches you carefully as you lay down on the bed, your head falling onto the fluffy pillow and your eyes closing almost immediately. He softly groans when you begin snoring only minutes later…his eyes never leaving you.
You’re going to be in Korea? For Yuna’s birthday? Taehyung reads your text like he’s on repeat. He is feeling an array of emotions, he feels good things, bad things, things in the middle. But the bad things…aren’t even very bad. It’s just anxiety…and doubt. Maybe it is that bad.
Taehyung decides not to reply not until he’s talked to his therapist, he wants to thoroughly discuss this over and come to a smart decision. But his heart is fucking fluttering at the thought of seeing you. He really misses you. But are either of you ready to face the other?
The next day Taehyung gets to the old man’s office, waiting patiently outside the door until he gets the signal he can go in. Where does he start? Does he just show the text to his therapist? Does he talk about something else first before nonchalantly bringing you up and this text that is haunting him?
“y/n texted me.” He decides to be straight forward, as usual.
“Ah, really?” the old man peeks at Taehyung through his glasses that rest lowly on his nose. “What did she say?”
“She’s coming here. She asked if she will see me.”
“And will you see her?”
“I…I don’t know.” Taehyung admits between a long breath, “I really don’t know.”
The old man nods his head in quiet understanding, he jots down some notes on his notebook with his pen.
“Taehyung.” The man stops writing his notes to get a look at Taehyung, “What do you want from her? If anything at all.”
“I just want her to live a good life.”
“That’s not what I asked. I asked what you want from her?”
“I don’t know anymore.” He tells the old man, his voice low.
“It’s okay not to know. You don’t have to see her if you aren’t ready, you know?”
“I don’t?” Taehyung asks, but then his lips curve upward like he realizes how silly his question is. “I know.” He nods his head, “But it’s not like I don’t want to see her. I do.”
“Then—”
“But I don’t know how to prepare for that. I don’t know how to face her. What will we even talk about? Why does she want to see me? Is she just being polite because we share the same friends? That she knows she’s bound to run into me? Or is it because she does want to see me? But why? Why?” Taehyung begins to ramble. “Can we coexist? Is this just about coexisting? Is that about us? Her and I? Is this about what we can maybe be? But how do either of us know we are ready for that?”
“Ah, that.” The old man sighs out, taking his glasses off. “I know it may seem like cliché words…but you will just know.”
“You’re right. Those are cliché words.” Taehyung says with a straight face.
“But they are a classic for a reason, you know?” The old man points out with a chuckle. “You will feel it. You will feel it in every fiber of your being of what the right thing to do is. You will feel it. Your bones will tell you. Your heart will tell you. You will realize how simple and easy it is to just know.”
“But I don’t know?”
“Because maybe it isn’t time for you yet to be aware. But the time will come.”
“I think for now…I need time to think. I didn’t have enough time to prepare for this.” Taehyung says honestly. “This is too sudden.”
“You have every right to feel that way.”
“But how does she feel?” Taehyung becomes worried, his soft expression becoming more and more serious.
“We’re here to focus on you.” The old man reminds him gently. “In the end, I believe you will do what you think is best. You will do what you think is right. And coming to those type of conclusions takes time.”
Taehyung sits down in a chair across from the bed, gazing at you as you sleep. He thought seeing you would give him the answers he needs but he’s still lost. It took a lot for him to show up here…it took a lot for him to gather the courage to face you. He thought for sure once he saw you he would know everything. He would feel what to do. But seeing you here only confuses him further. What does he want? What is he ready for? Does he even know you anymore?
Finally, Taehyung stands up from the chair and walks to your side of the bed. He reaches his hand to gently stroke your cheek before he’s leaving the room. Leaving you. He sends a text to Jimin letting him know your room number and that you’re fast asleep. Then he is heading back home.
~~~~
“A movie night?” you tilt your head to the side, “I don’t know…can we just—”
“It’ll be a good way for everyone to unwind from last night’s partying!” Jimin whines, “Please! I promise you can choose the first movie.” He offers with a sweet smile.
“Jimin I don’t know…if I’m up for this after last night…”
“Oh? Didn’t I tell you?” the corner of Jimin’s mouth curves upwards. “He said he was going to come tonight.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah, said he wanted to hang with everyone. Guess that includes you.” Jimin points out knowingly. “You said you guys didn’t really get to talk so maybe…”
“I don’t want to get my hopes up.”
“But you said you were going to give it your all right? This is an opportunity.”
“Oh…” you start pulling at the ends of your hair, “That’s true.”
“So movie night?”
“Movie night.”
You and Jimin clean up his place as you wait for everyone’s arrival. Hobi and Yoongi show up first, then Namjoon and finally Jungkook and Jin. Taehyung still hasn’t shown up and you guys are about to play your first movie. You wonder if he is really coming.
“He’s coming, I just talked to him on the way here.” Jungkook assures you. “Relax.”
“I am relaxed.” You lie, “You relax.”
“He went last night…that’s a good sign, right?”
“I don’t know.” You admit honestly. “We didn’t get to talk.”
Suddenly, you hear the front door unlocking and opening up. You guess he has a key. You freeze on the sofa, you can hear your heartbeat pounding in your ears. He’s here.
“Hey guys.” You hear his deep voice rumble. “I’m here.” He announces but you keep your eyes on the TV. You feel his footsteps get closer and closer, the pitter patter against the wooden floors making you so anxious.
Then you see his figure in your peripherals, he’s standing on the side of the couch, facing you.
“Hi y/n.”
You gulp, your eyes still on the TV when you remind yourself you’re a brave girl. You slowly turn your head to face him, your wide eyes finding his face. His hair is shorter than you remember, still a bit wavy and still dark. He looks so handsome, so mature. He’s got on some comfortable looking pants and a printed button up, his hands in his pockets as he looks down at you.
“Hi.” You squeak.
“Can I sit next to you?” he asks, his low voice barely heard by the others. “If it’s okay…”
“Yeah!” you rush to scoot over, making room for him. “Sit, sit.”
Taehyung gives you a wide boxy grin and nods his head quickly, he takes a seat next to you, his shoulder bumping yours. Fuck, you feel like you’re in middle school. His shoulder is like, fucking heaven or some shit.
“What movie did you guys decide on?”
“I don’t know, something random.” You tell him nervously. “It just started. You haven’t missed much.”
“I don’t think I’ll be paying much attention to the movie anyway.” Taehyung whispers, his warm breath fanning your cheek from how close he is.
“Oh?” you gulp. “Jimin says it’s good though.”
“I’m not really here for the movies, you know?” He leans into you a little bit and you feel a harsh, harsh blush creep up on your heated cheeks. His fingers find your knee and he taps against your jeans. “Can we talk outside?”
“The—The movie….” You whisper, pointing at the screen. “Let’s just watch the movie for now.”
Shit, you haven’t felt this nervous under his gaze in his long. His eyes study you as you watch the film. You can feel his intense gaze. You can feel how he just stares at you from time to time.
You aren’t sure why you are chickening out…maybe because you’re embarrassed about being drunk last night. How you asked if you guys could work on it, but he said he wanted to save this talk for later. It’s just making you more and more nervous.
“This movie is boring.” Jin yawns. “Let’s pause and order some food? Also let’s go to the store and get some beer?”
“Dude yes!” Hobi agrees, “I’ll go. Who wants to come with me?”
“I’ll go with you.” Namjoon raises his hand.
“You’re right I need your muscles to help me.”
“I’ll order the food!” Jimin offers but Jungkook is quick to volunteer as well, something about not trusting Jimin to get all the good meats.
“Sounds good.” Yoongi brings out his phone and starts playing on it.
Taehyung glances over at you and nods towards the patio.
“Shall we?” he begins standing up, he faces you and extends his hand out for you to take. You hesitate but you take it. The warmth of his hand sending tingles all throughout your body, you wonder if he feels it too.
He leads you out to the patio and you both take a seat across from one another. You nervously shake your knee up and down and Taehyung can’t help but chuckle.
“Will you calm down?” He insists, “You’re the one who wanted to talk, remember?”
“I know.” You find his beautiful, brown eyes. “I do.”
“Then talk.” He gestures for you to go on.
“Taehyung.”
“Yes?”
“How has your year been?” this is where you decide to start.
“Hard. Good. Worth it.” He leans back in the chair, “I struggled some days more than others but mostly…really good.”
“Do you think you could…be honest with me? Be open with me?” you nibble on your lips, your knee continues to shake.
“How so?”
“Can you tell me all about your year, what you went through, how you felt. Your feelings in general. Could you do that? With me?”
Taehyung blinks at you in surprise for a few seconds before he is closing his eyes altogether. He leans even further back in his chair and takes a deep breath.
“You want to know me again?” he whispers out. “You want to know me?”
“Yes. And I want you to know me in return.” Your shaking knee finally comes to a stop as you drag your chair closer to his. “I want to…really talk. About everything. I want to understand you. I want…”
“I understand.” Taehyung nods his head before opening his eyes again, they find yours and you’re intimated by his gaze. He observes you for a while, his serious expression making you nervous again.
“What do you want from me?” He asks bluntly. “What is your ultimate goal here?”
“You.” You reply just as straight forward. “I want you.”
“I don’t know.” He says quickly, you feel your heart squeeze in your chest. He doesn’t know?
“I think…” he sighs out, “I don’t think it’s that simple.” And what the old man said is starting to make sense. This is a moment where Taehyung feels it. He feels what the right thing to do is.
“I don’t think we can jump into something like romance, y/n.”
You brows pinch together as you listen to him speak, but you relax your features and nod in understanding,
“Do you want to be friends with me, Taehyung?”
“I think that’s a place we can start.”
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blu-joons · 3 hours ago
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When You Leave To Go On Tour ~ Kim Taehyung
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Watching you begin to throw your suitcase together was far from ideal for Taehyung as he sat down on the end of the bed. Each item felt like another kick in the teeth, another item for yet another day that the two of you would have to ultimately spend apart from one another.
The case was the one he had emptied just a little over a month ago after returning from tour with BTS, and now it was ready to fly around the world again, this time in your company as you travelled around Asia.
There was barely much time at all in between your busy lives when the case would be at home, between the two of you, it got plenty of use, not that either of you enjoyed that part of your lives.
“It sucks that you’re going,” Taehyung soon mumbled to himself.
Your eyes looked across to him as you heard him speak up, dropping another of your shirts into the case. “I know, but it’s only for four weeks, it’s one of the shortest trips either of us have been on in a while.
Although his head nodded in agreement with you, it didn’t make it any easier for Taehyung to watch you packing your belongings up. “Just when I think we’ve really got the time to settle with each other, something else comes up again, another trip to go on.”
You could only smile back across at him, there was nothing else for you to say, other than to agree. It was the way of life you both had chosen, and somehow you had to find the time to fit each other into that structure too.
“Don’t forget to take one of my shirts,” Taehyung called out to you as you finished packing up your own shirts, “I know how much you love to sleep in one.”
Your cheeks darkened in appreciation of how attentive Taehyung was as you made your way around to his wardrobe, picking up the shirt that was on the top of his pile.
“That’s one of my favourites,” he spoke, “so, you can have it.”
“I’ve got to take one of your favourites,” you tried to reason with him, “how else will I have a part of you with me if it’s not with something that you like?”
Rather than speak, Taehyung nodded as he felt a gulp run down his throat. Although he was used to seeing you come and go, there was something different this time around, for once, you’d had a substantial amount of time with one another, more than just a week or two.
“It’s going to be weird not waking up beside you again,” you smiled, perching on the end of the bed, “I’ve gotten quite used to our mornings together.”
Taehyung quickly shuffled forwards so that he was sat right by your side, moving his hand across to relax it against the top of your leg, nudging your side gently.
“I wish that I could go with you, that I could just forget about work and my responsibilities here and spend time with you.”
“I wish that life was that easy too Tae.”
His arm wrapped around you as he pulled you in tightly to rest against his chest, “if I hold you here tight enough, will you be too weak to get away and go on the road.”
“I’ll probably get the sack if I stayed here instead.”
“Would it be the worst thing in the world?”
Your hand pushed against his chest as he tried to convince you to stay, no matter how happy he wanted to be that you were back on the road, he just couldn’t find his smile.
He hated being away from you, whether it was him that was travelling, or you. “This place is going to feel so empty without you here, who’s going to be here to help me when I need it, or play with my hair when I’m trying to get to sleep?”
“You’ll just have to call Kook, I’m sure it wouldn’t be the first time that he’s played with your hair, am I right?”
Taehyung’s mouth opened to protest, quickly closing again when he realised that he couldn’t argue, and that you were in fact right.
“Think of it this way, who’s going to be there when you want someone to play with your hair,” he argued instead.
His hand instantly began to run through your hair, reminding you how much he loved to play with it, and how calming his touch was too whenever it ran along your body.
“You know that I love being at home, and I love being with you, but I’ve got to go,” you sighed, trying to ignore him as best as you could, “I hated seeing you go not too long ago, but I still let you go because I knew you were going off to do what you love.”
“I know,” he whispered dejectedly, “I just hate being the one that’s left behind, at home alone.”
“It’s never easy.”
His head instantly nodded in agreement with you, no matter who left, or how many goodbyes the two of you made, it never got easy for either of you.
“In the blink of an eye, I’ll be back,” you added, “and then we can spend a bit longer at home, together, without either of us going away again.”
With your cycles of work both starting again and plenty of new music to create you both had lengthy spells at home ahead of you, the perfect opportunity after a long time of waiting to really enjoy being at home with one another.
“That’s four weeks away,” Taehyung whined, “four whole weeks away from you.”
Your eyes rolled at the frustration in his voice, “it’s something that we’ve done plenty of times before, we can do it again too Taehyung.”
“I wish it didn’t have to be this way, I still wish that I could just runaway and go on tour with you and forget about everything else.”
It was a thought that had crossed your mind several times too when you’d said goodbye to Taehyung, but sadly for you both, it just wasn’t plausible. You both were busy, and you loved it, but with that came a hatred of constantly being away from each other.
You wished more than anything that your schedules could align, that one day you’d get the chance to go away together and see the world. Whilst the two of you loved travelling with your respective groups, there was a magic that was missing with not having each other.
For all of the memories that you had made, all of them belonged at home, too busy to ever find the chance to escape with one another.
“We’ve still got one last night before I go,” you reminded Taehyung in a whisper.
A soft hum came from above your head as he pulled you into him even tighter, “why don’t I help you finish packing all of this up so that you can get it done quicker? Then we can spend our final few hours doing something fun.”
“You’ll just hide my cases.”
“No!” Taehyung tried to protest, but as his voice faltered you managed to see right through him, “alright, so maybe I would have tried to stall you from going tomorrow.”
Your head shook, hitting gently against his leg, “I’ve got to go, and you’ve got to stay here, that’s just the way that it’s got to be.”
It was the last thing that he ever wanted to admit, but in his heart, Taehyung knew that you were left with no other option. Time apart should have been something the two of you were used to by now, but neither of you could ever quite get used to it.
“And you’ll be back as soon as you can be, right?”
“Of course, I will Tae.”
---
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gukyi · 8 months ago
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love me or we both go down | kth
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summary: after going through with an arranged marriage to please his parents and secure his inheritance of the family business, kim taehyung thinks he’s got it all figured out. he doesn’t. apparently just being married to you isn’t enough, not when everybody and their mother can pick up on the fact that the two of you absolutely loathe each other. but taehyung wants his inheritance one way or another, so he decides that desperate times call for desperate measures: the two of you need to fall in love, and you need to fall in love fast.
{enemies to lovers!au, arranged marriage!au, rich kids!au}
pairing: kim taehyung x female reader genre: fluff, angst, smut (i know, crazy right?) word count: 32k warnings: oral sex (m & f receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, multiple unprotected sex scenes (they’re married y’all), fat cock tae, tae has a wife kink, lots of praise, alcohol consumption (but they’re safe), minor character death (not explicit), mentions of heart attack, slow burn like there is no tomorrow a/n: hello and welcome to the fic everyone, literally everyone, has been waiting for! i am so, so, so excited to share this with you all, especially because none other than rose @kinktae​ helped me write the smut, and i am literally forever indebted to her. you all better go spam rose with all the love and support you can because this fic would not be here without her and i love her so much. 
also, to all my readers who aren’t comfortable reading smut, please know that the smut in this fic is not imperative to the storyline, and you skipping past it will not affect your reading experience., enjoy!
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Never in your life have wedding bells felt so ominous.
The sound of them is akin to the sound of strings, of a single piano note in a horror movie, right when the film opens and someone random is about to die on screen for the sake of proving to the audience that this is, in fact, a horror movie. Make no mistake about it; these wedding bells spell doom for you, too. And the most horrific part about them is that just like that poor, helpless soul in the movie, there is no way for you to escape your fate either. 
With only seconds left to go before you have no choice but to promise yourself to the man waiting at the other end of the aisle, you desperately try to think of any last-ditch efforts to get out of this. Many, if not all of them, are utterly useless. 
Feigning sudden illness won’t work, because then your parents will just reschedule the wedding to a later date. Running away is fruitless. Where will you go? The parking lot?
If only you had a lover out there in the audience somewhere that could object to the marriage when the officiant says, “Speak now, or forever hold your peace.” A knight in shining armor that could whisk you out of the venue and off to a new life, far away from here. Too bad all of the people you’ve dated before hate you now. 
Maybe getting married isn’t such a bad thing after all. Instead of having relationships with multiple people who will eventually despise your existence, you only have to have a relationship with one. And the feeling, as has always been, is mutual. 
You bristle as your assistants do some last-minute prepping, fixing your sleeve and adjusting your necklace and making sure you don’t trip on your enormous train. They flutter around you like a swarm of well-meaning but ignorant butterflies complicit in the agenda of your family. None of them have said a word to you about the wedding ever since you arrived at the venue, choosing to talk more about things like the weather. Not that you were ever under the impression they had been hired to entertain you. Maybe they were told to not engage you, just in case you try to conspire with them.
As if they could be of any use in your wildly unrealistic escape plans. 
The truth is that, unless you were to drop dead on this marble flooring right now, you’re getting married. Whether you like it or not.
The doors open. 
You’ve attended red carpets, galas, award shows, and balls. You’ve had hundreds of cameras flashing in your face, the bright light capturing each and every centimeter of you. You’ve had paparazzi waiting outside the restaurants you eat at, the stores you shop at, desperate to catch a picture of you in sweatpants without a drop of makeup on. You’ve been on dates with ex-lovers that looked at you like you were a piece of meat with a credit card. And yet, for some goddamn reason, walking down the aisle in a white dress the size of Pluto, with the rest of your life waiting for you at the other end, makes you feel fucking transparent. 
Face resolute, you clutch onto your bouquet so tightly the flowers feel like they’re about to pop right out of your grasp. Determined not to look at anybody in the audience, you stare straight ahead, right into the eyes of your future husband.
Kim Taehyung, for someone you have seen multiple times drunk off his ass with hickies dotting his neck and jawline, cleans up pretty well. For someone getting married, at least. He dons a simple black tuxedo that still probably costs more than the average car, his caramel brown hair is pushed back off his forehead, and his expression is firm and still. He most certainly has had an equally expensive team prepping him, but they haven’t done too bad a job. The silver lining is that he doesn’t look any more thrilled than you are to be doing this, right here, right now. But to his credit, this is definitely the best he’s ever looked, as far as you’re concerned. 
When you reach him, he offers his hand out to you, a hand that you only accept for the sake of professionalism. The bouquet in your hands is handed off to one of your bridesmaids, and the two of you take your position at the front. Your train drags along the aisle, draping over the few stairs you had to climb to reach the altar, this satin trail behind you that cements you to the floor. It may as well be a ball-and-chain. It’s about as heavy as one, anyway. 
This is the longest you and Taehyung have ever held eye contact. Not that you’re really keeping track of how long the two of you have met each other’s gazes, but if you had to make an educated guess, this would definitely be the victor. Most of the time you end up sneering at each other ten seconds in, but to be fair, those other times you were also not getting married. To one another. In a ceremony attended by hundreds of people. And cameras.
There can be no sneering here. 
“Don’t you look nice?” Taehyung whispers, loud enough so only the two of you can hear. He has that drawling, sickly sweet tone to his voice, the one that you hate because it makes him sound like he thinks he’s so much better than everyone else. “Surprised they were able to makeup that scowl off your face.”
This, of course, brings on a hearty scowl only he can see, your backs both facing the rows of attendees. “How much concealer are you wearing to cover up all of the hickies on your neck?” You quip back easily. It’s not like the two of you are going to pretend he doesn’t waltz around at every club or bar or private venue he can find, looking for his next treat. 
“Wouldn’t you like to know?” Taehyung grins, and if you weren’t standing in front of hundreds of people about to get married, there’s no telling what next you would do.
The two of you would probably go on like that for another ten minutes if it’s not for the officiant, who coughs once he’s ready and opens the book in his hands. Next to you, Taehyung straightens, hands clasped together at his front, and lips pressed into a neat line. You do the same. There will be no giggles, no laughter nor smiles, nor any genuine emotion at this wedding. This is a wedding for the sake of politics, for economics, for security, and anyone in attendance would be a fool to think otherwise. Especially you. 
“Ladies and gentlemen, family and friends, loved ones, and esteemed guests,” the officiant bellows, listing off as many groups of people as he possibly can in an effort to both include and compliment every person in the audience, “We are gathered here to celebrate the wedding, and future life, of Taehyung and Y/N…”
Taehyung turns to you, grinning in that god-awful way, the way he does when he feels like he’s got something over you. And sure, you can’t think of any punishment quite as bad as this, but what’s Taehyung got to smile about? He’s marrying himself off to a woman he hates, kissing goodbye his days as a free-spirited, heartbreaking bachelor, and promising what may very well be the rest of his life to loving you. That is not cause for celebration. 
But perhaps, to him, your suffering is enough to bring a smile to his face. 
Your vows are, to put it simply, total bullshit. Your family hired someone to write yours and there’s not a doubt in your mind that his family did the same thing. This nonsense talk, this complete and utter garbage that spews from your perfectly-glossed lips, shit about how you promise to love each other until the end of your days, how you promise to take care of each other when you’re sick and accompany each other at every event, every gala, every ball. Shit about how you promise to look only at each other, promise to uphold your family traditions and become a dependable spouse. 
The words don’t belong to you. But the thing is that this marriage was never yours anyway. 
When the kiss comes, there’s a part of you that thinks maybe you should have psyched yourself up a little more for this. When Taehyung pulls you in, placing a stiff hand on your lower back as he brings you towards his chest, your stomach turns and shivers run down your spine. The feeling of his hand on your body, the breath from his lips brushing against your own, are enough to keep you frozen in place. 
He smiles at you, almost as if to ask, “Are you ready?”
And you squeeze your eyes shut, almost as if to respond, “Let’s do this.”
When his lips meet yours, there is almost nothing. Nothing runs through you, nothing explodes, nothing strikes. But when he pulls away and cheers and applause rings out throughout the room, there is something. A little heat, a remnant of a flame, left on your lips. A little sting, just to remind you it happened. 
The entire hall is cheering but nothing about this is worth celebrating. The fact of the matter is that you and Taehyung will never love each other the way that you are supposed to. 
“Ugh, finally.”
The elevator doors haven’t even properly opened by the time Taehyung is loosening his tie, tugging it off over his head as he stretches his head back and runs a hand through his perfectly-styled hair. As he rakes his fingers through his caramel locks, the hairspray and gel loosens, strands falling down by the side of his face, framing his temple.
“Don’t sound so relieved,” you huff out, deciding now is as good a time as any to start getting undressed yourself. Reaching down to lift up the hem of your reception dress, you tug off your heels, already feeling lighter on your feet. Who cares if Taehyung is watching you pull off your stilettos like a defeated movie heroine? You don’t think you can walk another step in those shoes. “We still have to live together, you know.”
“Don’t remind me,” Taehyung says gruffly, brushing by you roughly as he stomps out of the elevator. “I’m just glad the fucking night is over. I swear, seeing that fake-ass smile on your face made me want to gouge my eyes out.”
You storm after him, refusing to be the helpless damsel in this situation. “Oh, like you didn’t also have that exact same fake-ass smile on your face. It almost made me think you were actually enjoying yourself tonight.”
“I was only enjoying the fact that I know you hate this just as much as I do.” It’s perhaps the only thing you will ever be able to empathize with him on. Mutually relishing in the other’s destruction. Taehyung fumbles with the keypad to the door to the penthouse for a moment before you hear the lock click, the door sliding open as the entrance lights flicker on. 
The reason Taehyung’s penthouse is so clean is because he’s never lived here before. Neither of you have—Taehyung’s parents bought it just for the two of you. And as much as you absolutely despise the idea of having to live with him, at least it was not you who paid for your place of residence. 
You can tell Taehyung’s never lived here before because it’s actually quite nicely decorated inside. The ceilings are high and the sleek velvet curtains are pulled open, revealing a shimmering skyline. The furniture is modern and functional, and the whole damn place smells brand new. You’ve had the unfortunate pleasure of entering the place Taehyung lived in before now, and it looked nothing like this. The furniture was worn and stained despite the live-in maid, the house reeked of five hundred different spices that wafted from the kitchen to the living room, and the bookshelves were covered with comics, graphic novels, and old textbooks. 
If it weren’t for the fact that you and Taehyung are rich kids in their twenties that hate each other, you might have actually thought the place looked… homey. 
You don’t have time to be impressed by the interior design and architecture skills of whoever designed this place. Right now, all you can think about is tugging yourself out of your airtight reception dress and passing out on the nearest bed. Which, hopefully, will be as far away as possible from Taehyung’s bed of choice. 
“How many bedrooms does this place have?” You ask, shimmying along the floor so you don’t trip over the hem of your dress. From the looks of it, you can see one giant hallway to your right and a massive, double-sided staircase leading up. 
“Enough,” Taehyung grumbles in response. The hazy stupor from all of the fancy champagne is starting to wear off for the both of you, leaving behind two grouchy, begrudgingly-married individuals who want absolutely nothing to do with each other and have no problems making that known. Whatever golden light of the evening that was making Taehyung at least a little bit more attractive than usual has faded, and now you see him for what he really is: an unceremoniously tired man in a suit. “You want upstairs or down?”
You gaze up at the marble staircase in front of you, then back down at your too-long dress. “Down.” The last thing you want is to trip in front of the man you have to see, every day, for the rest of your life. 
“Fine by me.” Taehyung’s halfway up the stairs by the time he turns back around to say something else. “I’ll see you tomorrow, I guess?”
“Yeah.” There’s no point in being hostile now. The both of you are too exhausted to mean anything by it. Besides, what else can you say? Everything to complain about has already been complained about. At least the two of you managed to wrestle out from your parents the stipulation that you would not be going on a honeymoon together. Now that would have been your worst nightmare. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
It’s as good of a goodnight either of you are going to get. Taehyung heads up the stairs and disappears around a corner, and you start wandering down the hallway. All the bedrooms look the exact same other than different colors on the walls and bedsheets, but they all look serviceable to you. Clean. Empty. Far away from wherever Taehyung is. 
You pick the one at the very end of the hall just to be as much of a diva as possible, and don’t even bother drawing the curtains before tugging off your dress. It’s past one in the morning, and you’re so high up you don’t think anyone will be able to see you anyway. By the time you’ve stripped naked and are tugging up the too-tight sheets tucked into the mattress, your legs are about to give out beneath you. The bed could be made of rocks for all you care. Anything to lie down on is fine by you. 
Sleep comes fairly easily to you tonight. Once your head hits the pillow you can already feel yourself drifting off, eyelids fluttering shut, but you don’t sleep quite yet. Not before you can think about how this is your life now, sleeping in a foreign bed in a foreign place with a foreign husband upstairs. This is what you will be living in now. Now and forever. 
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Living with Taehyung is, in both the best and worst ways possible, like living with a roommate that doesn’t give a shit about the fact that they live with another person. It’s good, because you and Taehyung hardly see each other and speak even less, which was pretty much the only thing you were asking for when it came to living with him. But it also sucks, because whenever you do happen to cross paths, Taehyung acts like you don’t exist, barely sparing you a hello or even that tight-lipped smile you send to drivers on the road when they let you cross the street. 
Not that the two of you ever engaged in energetic conversation before you got married. But at least the two of you would acknowledge each other, even if only to shoot a glare and a scowl the other’s way from opposite sides of a hotel ballroom. Maybe it’s just because it’s him, but you did always find yourself actually relishing in those little interactions with Taehyung. In this strange, twisted way, it seemed to provide some sort of continuity to your ever-changing life. Like no matter what happened, at least you would know that the two of you would always despise each other. 
To be frank, right now you’re not sure if Taehyung even remembers he got married at all.
Nights have been a lot more sleepless since your wedding day. After two weeks, the reality of it has finally started to settle in. This is your life now. And ever since you realized that, your bed has felt much less comfortable. 
“But the place is nice, right?”
You look around the living room from where you’re sat on the sleek, white suede leather couch, eyes glossing over the bookshelves, the floor-to-ceiling windows, the draping velvet curtains. From here, you can see the entire city skyline, flecks of gold from the windows of skyscrapers against a navy blue background. Slowly, as the moon creeps over the sky and the clock gets later and later, those lights will soon begin to flicker off, one by one. 
“Yeah, it’s not bad.” Nothing to write home about. That is, if home were a place other than here. 
“That’s good. At least you don’t live in, like, a total dump or anything,” Victoria says on the other end of the line. “How’s Taehyung?”
His name alone elicits this deeply-exhausted sigh from your lips, like it’s been ten years since you married and every day has felt worse than the last. “Fine.” You can’t really complain about anything yet, considering that you hardly ever see the man. 
“Just ‘fine’?” Victoria sounds skeptical. 
“Yeah,” you draw out the word, as if trying to convince yourself of its truth. “I mean, it’s like he doesn’t even live here. I barely see him. And when I do, we don’t even speak to each other.”
“That’s good though, isn’t it? You hate him.” Victoria says it like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. And in a sense, it kind of is. 
“I mean…”
“I know that your life hasn’t exactly… gone the way you had planned, but isn’t this your best case scenario when considering everything?” She asks. “If Taehyung is as distant as you say he is, isn’t it almost like you never married him in the first place?”
As if on cue, you hear footsteps coming down the stairs, heels clicking on the marble as they make their way to the entrance. You whip your head around to find Taehyung, all dressed up in loose, flowy slacks and a flowery silk button-down, strolling down the staircase as he scrolls through his phone, paying you zero attention whatsoever. 
He notices you briefly when he reaches the bottom, meeting your eyes with his own. He offers this measly, unenthused half-smile your way before he grabs his wallet and some house keys from the table by the entrance, opens the door, and vanishes off into the night. 
If you hadn’t been in the living room, you probably wouldn’t have even realized he left. Not that you being present as he’s planning on leaving would have stopped him anyway. This is the sixth night he’s done this in the past two weeks. You could stand by the door and stare him down as he emerges from his bedroom, all dressed up for something you’re definitely not invited to, and he would offer you that same goddamn smile and walk out the door without even blinking. Who he was before you got married and who he is now are no different. Not even a ring could change that. 
“I guess,” you tell Victoria. At least Taehyung hasn’t turned into a helicopter husband. “I don’t know. Maybe I just wish that I didn’t have to deal with him at all.”
Wish you could turn back time. Wish you could worm your way out of an arranged marriage before it was too late. Wish you could go back to the way things used to be. 
You and Victoria talk for another couple of minutes before she regretfully has to end the call, citing both her beauty sleep and an 8AM meeting tomorrow morning as her reasons for hanging up. The moment you put the phone down, you sink back into the couch cushions, staring out the windows at the world below you.
Here’s the deal. What Taehyung does in his free time is none of your business. But also, it’s totally your business, because you are his spouse. A spouse who is an equal amount in the public eye as he is. What he does and does not do has a direct impact on what you do and do not do. 
It’s no secret that when you catch Taehyung sauntering down the stairs looking like a Gucci runway model, it’s not because he’s planning on catching a movie with a college friend and then playing video games for four hours on a couch in a basement. He is going out. To clubs, to parties, to exclusive events that he’s been invited to by his equally-rich friends, all of whom are acting like he’s the same bachelor he’s always been. 
And maybe that’s the real problem with your whole marriage—other than the glaringly obvious issue that it’s a marriage wholly unwanted by the two parties involved in it. Despite the ring on his finger, Taehyung is going out and pretending that nothing in his life has changed while you’re trapped at home, desperate to save you and your family’s reputation by keeping as low a profile as possible. You would give anything to march around the city all day, flashing middle fingers at paparazzi as you shop at your favorite high-end stores and frequent your favorite clubs. But you can’t, because your family’s fortune and influence is on the line. 
And apparently, Taehyung’s isn’t. 
It sort of makes you wonder why it was even Taehyung you ended up marrying anyway. His family isn’t any richer or more powerful than yours. Your spheres have always been sufficiently separate. What was it about him, and perhaps more importantly, his family that drew your parent’s eye? And what was it about marrying you that prevented him from saying no? Money? Prestige? Influence?
You suppose you’ll never know. But whatever mystical force that convinced Taehyung to agree to this must not be as important to him as your reasoning is to you, because it’s become exceedingly apparent that Taehyung does not care that he’s married. He doesn’t care about the ring on his finger, he doesn’t care about his public image, and he most certainly doesn’t care about you.
Perhaps you were naive for thinking this, but you actually believed marriage might tone him down a little. Might age him into a real adult with real world obligations. Instead, it’s only given you a firsthand look into who Kim Taehyung has been and always will be: a selfish rich kid.
You don’t bother waiting around in the living room until he gets back, but you are still awake by the time you hear the door creak open. Taehyung makes no efforts to hide his return. You can hear him chattering loudly on the phone as he stumbles up the stairs, can tell from his gait alone that he is most certainly wasted. You don’t want to know what he did tonight. You’ll probably be able to figure it out anyway when you wake up tomorrow morning and check your social media. 
What were you thinking, marrying him? That he would change? That he would suddenly become someone that you could rely on? You had no choice when you said, “I do,” but you were at least hoping that maybe one day, one day in a long, long time, the two of you would finally see eye to eye. Maybe there would even come a time when you would genuinely love him. How foolish. 
You close your eyes and try to imagine a world where you have married someone you love, someone who loves you back.
Not unlike the many nights preceding it, tonight is sleepless. 
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Unlike your marital status and general disposition, one thing that hasn’t changed about you is your love for extravagant events. Call you conceited, but there is something so much fun about putting on a fancy, expensive dress that you love and getting your hair and makeup done before going to an exclusive gala and posing in front of five hundred cameras. 
Actually, now that you think about it, maybe your wedding could have actually been pretty good, considering it let you do all those things. It’s a real shame there happened to be a storm cloud in the form of Kim Taehyung there to ruin it. Otherwise, you think you would have rather enjoyed that day. 
Tonight is the first event since your marriage where you and Taehyung are both required to show up and act like a happy married couple. Which would probably be a lot easier if you and Taehyung had exchanged more than ten words over the past two weeks. Maybe it was wishful thinking, but there was a part of you that thought you could use your arranged marriage to actually cultivate some sort of meaningful relationship between the two of you. So events like these wouldn’t be such a drain on both of you. 
When Kim Taehyung comes down the stairs, he actually doesn’t look too bad. You don’t know why this sort of thing keeps catching you off guard—like you don’t expect him to look that good whenever you see him. The problem is that you can’t even chalk up the surprise to him wearing tailored clothes or having his hair done. He just looks… good. 
Well, you suppose you do have to look at him every day for the rest of your life. It’s a good thing he’s attractive. At least he’s not sore on the eyes. 
Taehyung and his unfortunate attractiveness aside, the two of you don’t say a word to each other as you join up at the entrance, grabbing any last-minute items like house keys, chapstick, and whatever dignity you have left to spare. You send forced smiles and tight nods each other’s way in the elevator, staring straight ahead in the lobby of your building as the car pulls up to the front door.
By the time the two of you sit down in the back of the limousine, the built-up tension between the two of you is so thick you’re almost positive that even the chauffeur can feel it through the closed partition. 
If you were any more idyllic, you’d probably spend the drive over to the gala staring out the window and imagining yourself in a different life, on a train to nowhere, flowers in your hair and a journal in your hands. Or perhaps you’d be the CEO of your family’s company instead of having that responsibility passed down to a husband you don’t even want, sitting in an office at the top of a skyscraper overlooking the city. Anything. Anything but this.
But the idyllic part of you died when you realized that fantasies like that are nothing but distractions and that daydreams are for romantics and optimists and losers. 
“What’s our plan for tonight?”
Taehyung scoffs. “What do you mean, ‘what’s our plan’?”
You frown. “Well, we’re married, so we at least have to act like it, don’t you think?”
“Isn’t standing there and smiling enough?” Taehyung asks, an unimpressed eyebrow raised. 
You bristle. Maybe that sufficed for your wedding, but there was so much going on it was easy to distract yourself from the gravity of it all. But this event is not about you. It’s not even about either of your families. It’s about someone the two of you are, at best, distantly connected to, through work, through fame, through power. Which means that though the focus will not be on you, there will still be eyes looking your way. Eyes watching your every move. 
“Do you think it will be?” You challenge. Doesn’t Taehyung realize that things are different now?
Taehyung’s lips curl downwards. “What do you expect us to do, shower each other in kisses? We don’t even sleep on the same fucking floor.”
“Maybe I just expected you to act less like a stranger and more like a husband!”
Taehyung sighs. “Don’t.” The word is clipped, short. “Don’t tell me you actually want to be married.”
“I don’t.” It’s a response that you hardly have to think twice about. “But we are, and nothing can change that.” Unfortunately. But it’s a fact that you and Taehyung have both had to grapple with over the past few weeks, and it’s becoming increasingly obvious that you are more aware of it than he is. If Taehyung could have his way, he would ignore you for the rest of his life and keep partying with the rest of his bachelor friends until he keeled over and died. 
He huffs next to you, eyes staring straight ahead. You don’t think the two of you have met each other’s eyes in a week. Maybe more. They’re starting to feel as soulless as your marriage itself. “Whatever. What do you want me to do?”
“What do you think?” You cross your arms over your chest. “Just act like you don’t hate me. Can you do that?” The way Taehyung’s behaving right now, you expect that will be a challenge for the both of you.
“Only if you can. I’ll even hold your hand to prove that we love each other.”
“Fine.”
“Fine.”
The idea of holding Taehyung’s hand makes you want to implode. The mere thought sends shivers down your spine. But it’s better than nothing, and that’s good enough for you. At least you won’t have to kiss. 
The rest of the ride there is silent. You drive to this gorgeous mansion just outside the city, bathed in lights hidden amongst the bushes, illuminating both the architecture and the enormous fountain that sits in front of it. In a house this size, you imagine you could probably go your whole life without ever having to come across Taehyung. It actually makes you consider investing in a home that big. 
Taehyung helps you out of the back of the limousine, a cold hand clasping your own as you rest your palm against his. You can feel the way his fingers hesitate as yours make to intertwine with his as you walk towards the entrance, smiling at whatever camera flashes you encounter on your way. If you didn’t know any better, you’d think you were holding hands with a ghost. 
The moment you step inside and are ushered out of the door’s view, Taehyung’s grip relaxes on yours. For a moment, you think he’ll actually spend the rest of the night like this, a gentle hand wrapped around yours, but then he pulls it away entirely and shoves it back into his pocket. Oh. You frown quietly to yourself. So that’s how tonight’s going to go. 
You don’t make an effort to reach out towards him again. 
For an event concerning people you don’t know a damn thing about, everyone sure seems to know things about you. Other than greetings, you don’t think anyone’s said anything to you about anything other than your recent marriage to Taehyung. Every conversation is punctuated by a Congratulations! you do not feel that you have at all earned, considering you and Taehyung could barely look at each other on the way here.
Maybe Taehyung was right. All you really can do is stand there and smile.
“Oh, don’t tell me… Y/N, is that you?”
The champagne swirls around in the flute between your fingers as you turn towards the sound of your name, looking up to see a familiar face headed your way. 
Kim Seokjin is nice enough. He’s terribly handsome and got a flawless smile, but you know better than to trust those pearly whites of his. The sight of him alone is enough to make your body tense up. There was a reason you had explicitly told your parents not to invite him to your wedding. 
“Seokjin, what a surprise to see you here,” you say, forcing a smile. “I thought you were supposed to be in Switzerland right now.”
“Change of plans,” Seokjin grins back in that awful, awful way, the kind of grin that makes you feel like he’s looking right through you. “I came back early. It’s a shame, though, I missed your wedding.”
You shrug. “It was a humble affair.” It wasn’t. And you’re positive that Seokjin knows it wasn’t an accident that you didn’t extend an invitation to him or his family. 
“Ah, I see,” Seokjin says, nodding his head. He turns to Taehyung next to you, who is making no effort to hide how wholly uninterested in this conversation he is, and holds out a hand. “You must be Kim Taehyung, then. I’m Kim Seokjin. Congratulations on your wedding.”
Taehyung shakes his hand firmly, the air between the three of you growing unbearably palpable. 
“Seokjin’s father is the VP of News Daily,” You explain, eyebrows raised as you try to signal to Taehyung what exactly it means when Seokjin is speaking to the two of you. “And his mother is a popular journalist for the city’s post.”
Seokjin grew up in the world of media, and it seems he’s picked up his parent’s affinity for sticking their noses in places they don’t belong. You know he’s not talking to the both of you out of the goodness of his heart. 
Seokjin laughs, his hand waving away the mention of his parents. “Oh, please. That’s them. I’m just a bored socialite like the rest of you.”
You resist the urge to scoff. 
“Marriage treating the two of you well?” He changes the subject to what he really wants to talk about: you. 
“Of course,” you say quickly, preventing any hesitation on your end. Your empty hand reaches towards Taehyung’s, fingers searching for his between the two of you. But his refusal to join hands does not go unnoticed by you nor Seokjin, who is eyeing the space between your bodies with an eyebrow raised. “It’s just been—well, it’s just been difficult to adjust to a new life. That’s all.”
If you were to describe the face of a non-believer, it would be the exact expression on Seokjin’s face. “Perfectly understandable,” he says, that same toothy smile lacing his features. “But it must be nice, you know, to marry someone you love.”
“I couldn’t be happier,” you say, almost challenging Seokjin to say something even more inflammatory. He must know that all you’re trying to do at this point is save face. Love? Ha! As if. 
“And Taehyung?” Seokjin motions to your husband. 
You can feel the way Taehyung is stiffening beside you. “I suppose we are both lucky and unlucky in many ways when it comes to who we love.”
It’s enough of an answer to get Seokjin off your tail. For now. He bids the two of you a tense goodbye before sauntering off to go poke his nose in someone else’s business, fish for drama, a thread of a rumor he can pick apart with nimble fingers. You wonder if anybody actually likes him. 
The moment he disappears from earshot, you grab Taehyung’s wrist tightly and pull him close to you. “What the hell was that?” You hiss into his ear. 
“What?” You can’t tell if he’s playing dumb or if he really is that dense. 
“You!” You exclaim. “Kim Seokjin is the one person who could easily expose how fake this marriage is and you pull away from me? Right in front of him? You can’t even hold my hand for two seconds, that’s how much you hate me?”
“Who cares what he thinks?” Taehyung says. “He’s just another media rat. No one will even remember we were here tomorrow.”
“But if you keep acting like this, people will start to notice! Why can’t you just act like you don’t hate me, for one night? Is that so bad? Is it that torturous, to spend one night with me?”
“Do not turn this on me,” Taehyung orders harshly. “You’re making a scene. Come on.”
You don’t have time to shout at him for bossing you around like you’re a toddler throwing a tantrum before he drags you out of the venue, the two of you finding a back door to the building that leads outside. The cold air blows against your body, goosebumps popping up against your skin, but you find that the chilly night provides quite the respite after practically overheating indoors. Taehyung makes fire rush through your veins but at least the air can cool you back down. 
Nevertheless, your conversation is not over. It’s just been moved to a more private location.
“You do realize that our marriage isn’t going to suddenly go away, right? That we’re going to have to keep doing this for the rest of our lives?” You remind him, eyebrows raised. There’s a part of you that genuinely thinks he’s completely forgotten that your marriage is permanent.
“Oh, and not holding hands for five minutes for this one event is totally going to change the course of our lives, isn’t it?” Taehyung fights back.
“Don’t act like you did the right thing,” you spit out. “You don’t have to pretend in front of me. I know you don’t give a shit about our marriage.”
“What marriage is there to even give a shit about? Just because we had a wedding and signed some documents does not mean there is a real marriage between us. Look at us,” he motions between the two of you like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “We hate each other. Is this what you would call marriage?”
“But at least I’m trying to get past that!” You exclaim. “You make it seem like being as miserable as possible is some sort of badge of honor. Do you actually want to spend the rest of your life hating the person you married? Or do you want to grow up and try and move on?”
Taehyung frowns. “What I want is for the person I married to stop acting like they’re doing me such a huge favor by pretending to care about us. Especially when all they really care about is their family’s goddamn reputation.”
“No,” you tell him sternly. You are doing him a favor. He just can’t admit that he actually needs help from you. “You are putting zero effort into this. What am I supposed to do?”
“Let it go!” Taehyung shouts. “Maybe one day we’ll actually start getting along, but right now it’s obvious that neither one of us can stand the other. I don’t need you to do favors for me. I can handle it myself.”
You look away, rolling your eyes. “Doesn’t look like it to me,” you mutter to yourself. 
Taehyung cracks. “Fine. You want me to pretend that I actually care about us? I will.” Thank God. Maybe now the two of you will finally start seeing eye-to-eye. “But make no mistake about how I feel about you,” he spits. “Getting married to you ruined my life.”
You stare straight at him and his eyes are swirling, so obscured in the darkness of the night that you might even think he doesn’t have a soul at all. His pupils bore into yours and for once, for once in your goddamn life, after so many years of staring each other down at debutante balls, so many years of witty refrains and snarky insults hurled each other’s way, it feels like the two of you might actually snap. 
Then, a camera flashes.
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Trouble in Paradise! would be a suitable title for the front page of the city’s biggest tabloid… if anything about your life with Taehyung could be considered paradise. Unfortunately for the both of you, that is not the case. 
You don’t need to keep reading the rest of the trashy article on the front page of the daily tabloid to know how much trouble you’re in, nor do you even have time to scroll beneath the terrible photo of you and Taehyung literally shouting at each other before you hear your phone ring. 
You don’t even bother saying hello to whoever’s on the other end. You know it’ll go in one ear and out the other. 
“I assume you know why I’m calling,” your mother’s harsh tone spits from the other end of the phone. There’s no doubt in your mind that she’s standing in the middle of her office, snapping her fingers at her fifteen secretaries as they partake in the worst damage control your family’s had to deal with since your cousin two years ago was caught with a mistress outside a high-profile restaurant. 
“Can I take a wild guess?” You’re about to be scolded into the next century, so you might as well enjoy your last few moments. 
“Don’t get cheeky with me,” your mother warns. “Care to explain why you and your beloved husband made the front page of the Daily Post today?”
“I know,” you sigh, a hand coming up to rub at your temples. It’s eight in the morning, you’ve barely looked at your phone, and you haven’t even brushed your teeth yet. It feels like you’re still asleep, and most certainly lack the energy to deal with this right now. 
Your mother, on the other hand, thinks otherwise. “You know? You know, and you still go out and do this? For everyone to see?”
“We tried to take our argument outside,” you begin to explain, but your mother isn’t having a single word of it. 
“The fact that you thought it was even appropriate to have an argument in a public setting at all astounds me, Y/N. We raised you better than that.” There’s no need for you to even see her face. You’ve grown so used to that disappointed frown over the years that it’s burned into your brain. 
“Maybe you should have thought about that before marrying me off to a man I barely know so I could be someone else’s problem instead of yours,” you bite. 
“We did this for your own good,” she hisses back. “You are married because we love you, and we want you to succeed outside of this family.”
“Then why do you care what the tabloids print about me?”
“Because being married does not mean you are no longer a part of this family,” your mother informs you sternly, lips smacking together. “Your marriage reflects on all of us, and you know that. What will people think of us when they see how terribly behaved you are?”
“Everyone acts like that, and you know it.” How could your mother preach good behavior when everyone, everyone you know, is just as spoiled and entitled as you? There’s no such thing as being altruistic when it comes to people like you. Being genuine, and good, and pure—that will get you ruined. 
You can hear her breathing into the phone when your mother responds, “But not in public, and that is the point. We expect better from you.”
“If you were so worried about me behaving so badly, then why did you even marry me off anyway? You knew that I didn’t want to. What did you think would happen?” It’s a question you wouldn’t have dared ask three months ago. Hell, even a year ago, when it was first revealed you were to be engaged, you wouldn’t have dared open your lips. But things are different now. You’re married to a man that hates you just as much as you hate him. He is making no effort to improve your relationship and seems hellbent on despising you forever. There is no way to get out of it. And if your parents really foresaw all of that, then what was the point in the first place?
“Your grandmother.”
Your mouth shuts. 
“You know she wanted to see you married before she passed,” your mother says, words clipped and biting and harsh. “She cares about you. She wanted to make sure you’d be taken care of.”
“I don’t need anyone to take care of me,” you mutter to yourself like a petulant child. In a way, you sort of are.
“If you want to stay in her will, I suggest you change that mindset.”
You freeze in your tracks. The will?
“Is that a threat?” You ask, positively dumbfounded. Are you being coerced into staying in this marriage because of your grandmother’s will?
You can hear your mother laugh, that muted, knowing chuckle of hers. “It was the deal all along, remember?”
Vaguely, you do. You remember fighting your parents tooth and nail over getting married until your grandmother revealed it was her dream to see you wed. You remember the look on her old, wrinkled face, that soft, sad smile that said she knew she didn’t have much time left. You remember agreeing, because how could you deny her? You remember her promising to remember what you’re doing for her. 
“You’re kidding.”
“I’m not.”
“But—”
“That’s the end of this conversation, Y/N. You fix things with your husband or you’re out of her will. She’s made that clear. I expect you’ll make the right choice.”
She hangs up. 
Well. 
There are a lot of ways to describe how you’re currently feeling, and you most certainly had an expensive education that would provide you with plenty of the vocabulary, but you think the most appropriate words for the current situation would be: you’re fucked. 
At least the feeling is mutual. 
Hardly two minutes after your mother’s brutal phone call, Taehyung comes storming down the stairs, hair still mussed from the night prior, his own phone clenched tightly between is fingers. Even from where you stand in the middle of the living room, you can see the way his eyes are glinting with anger, the veins popping out from his skin. 
“I just got off the phone with my parents,” Taehyung begins, not even bothering to spare a ‘good morning’ your way, “and they are fucking furious about last night.”
You shrug. “Join the club,” you mutter, arms crossed in front of you. What, does Taehyung really think you got off scot-free?
“Don’t act like this means nothing to you,” Taehyung says as he approaches you, footsteps calm despite his demeanor being anything but. “You’re the one who’s so obsessed with keeping up their family’s perfect reputation. You’re the reason we’re even in this mess in the first place.”
“What do you mean, ‘I’m the reason’?” You ask, astounded. Like he’s totally absolved of all blame and just an innocent third party. “You are the reason we went outside. You are the reason we had that argument, because you refuse to accept the fact that we’re actually married and there’s nothing we can do about it.”
“Right, because holding hands is really gonna show all those people how in love we are. I bet your parents are so thrilled right now.” Taehyung drawls. 
“It’s a start!” You shriek. “God, you’re just so—so infuriating! You can’t accept that this was your fault, too. You just have to turn everything against me and you always, always have to get the last word. It’s like you think you’ll die if you don’t.”
“Like you’re any better,” Taehyung huffs back. “You think I’m the villain because I don’t want to pretend to be in love with someone I’m not in love with. You act like us not holding hands is going to ruin our lives. It was one event! One! It’s obvious we hate each other, so why even try?”
“What, do you expect me to just sit around and do nothing? To act like everything’s fine? Like I’m happy?” As if. This marriage is the worst thing that’s ever happened to you. “While you prance around the city with your rich boy friends, going out to clubs and parties and pretending that I don’t exist? Is that what you expect from me?”
Taehyung laughs, this loud, disbelieving sort of noise, like he’s never heard such nonsense before. “Just because we’re married doesn’t mean the rest of my life has to change. Am I not allowed to enjoy myself with my friends? Or are you determined to keep me chained to your side for the rest of our lives?”
“What I want,” you punctuate every word, “is for you to stop acting like you haven’t got stakes in this, too. You think I don’t know how your family works? What being married to me means for you? Because I do. And I know that if we were to divorce, it would be you who would get the short end of the stick. Make no mistake.”
That’s enough to shut Taehyung up for a good few seconds. And it shuts him up, because he knows it’s true. Taehyung’s family may have a little more money, a little more power than yours, but you’ve got a family intimately more connected with the media. One phone call and Taehyung may have a rather messy, rather public breakup to deal with. 
“You wouldn’t,” he says, calling your bluff. 
“Are you sure about that?” You say, sticking your ground. You would never really divorce him, of course, but he doesn’t need to know that.
“I am,” Taehyung says firmly. “Don’t think I don’t know what being married to me is in it for you. What is it? Money? Power? Your father’s CEO position?”
“That’s none of your business,” you snap quickly. Maybe you’re more transparent than you thought. Bristling, you straighten your shoulders and turn back to meet his eyes. “Regardless, it seems we both have a reason to stay in this marriage.”
“It seems we do,” Taehyung agrees with a thin, contained smile. “Then I suppose we can reach some sort of agreement.”
“As in…?” Your interest in piqued. 
“I’ll stop going out with my friends if you stop picking fights with me all the time,” he says economically, like he’s killing two birds with one stone. 
“Only if you agree to also act more like my husband when we’re in public,” you tack on, because you just can’t settle for anything less. 
“Public only,” Taehyung specifies. 
You scoff. “Like I’d even want to pretend to be your wife when we’re in private.”
“Good. It seems we’ve come to a deal.”
“What’s in this for you, huh?” You prod, just to be annoying. Taehyung’s right. There’s a reason you’re not divorcing him the second you get the chance. But there must be a reason why he’s not doing the same thing. 
“Does it matter?” He challenges, a single eyebrow raised. “My life is just as awful as yours.”
Fair enough. 
“Do we have a deal?” Taehyung asks, holding out his hand, that sneaky, devilish grin lacing his features. 
Taking his hand in yours and grasping it firmly is the easiest decision in the world. His palm presses against your own, hot hand meeting your cold skin, and it feels like the two of you are finally finding some sort of balance. You look up into his eyes, burn your gaze into his pupils, watch them glint in the white ceiling light of the living room. 
“Deal.”
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For two people raised on the values of reading the fine print and making educated choices when it comes to business deals, you and Taehyung sure haven’t worked out any of the intricacies of the deal the two of you agreed to. Unlike those business deals your parents constantly agreed to, however, knowing all of the stipulations and provisions of your strange, strange agreement with Taehyung may prove more harmful than helpful. 
Like right now. 
“Wait, we don’t have to be by each other’s side the whole night, do we?” Taehyung asks you, eyebrows furrowed in a knot, as you sit in the back of a big, black van on your way to a mutual friend’s twenty-first birthday bash. 
“There are going to be a lot of cameras there,” you respond. 
“Yeah, outside the entrance to the damn club. You know they won’t be allowed in, so who cares?” Taehyung rebukes. 
You huff out a little sigh, not wanting to get into an argument when you’re literally minutes away from your first public appearance since the whole tabloid debacle from three weeks ago. You and Taehyung could both do with being a bit more relaxed than you normally are when you’re around each other. 
“Hasn’t Clarissa invited hundreds of people? They’ll all notice if we aren’t together,” you remind pointedly. The girl whose birthday party you are attending is an heiress who grew up on the money of two people with a monopoly over the current artificial intelligence market and has millions of followers on social media. There will be notable people there. And people will know the two of you, as well. 
Taehyung rolls his eyes. “That’s the point, Y/N. There’ll be so many people, no one will even care. It’s her twenty-first birthday. Do you think people are going to be sober?”
You purse your lips together. He’s got a point. “How about when we are together, we hold hands. But if you see a friend or something then feel free to say hi.” Taehyung can be afforded that luxury. Especially because the chances of him not bumping into someone he knows is exceedingly low anyway. 
Taehyung nods in agreement. “You too. But I won’t leave you unless I know you’re with someone you’re close with.”
“You don’t have to stay, I’ll be fine,” you say with a small chuckle. What, is Taehyung suddenly worried, or something?
“Yeah, but it would be in bad taste if I left you with someone you didn’t know well. Or alone. Just wanna make sure you’re taken care of.” He shrugs nonchalantly, turning back to look out of the window on his side of the car. 
“Okay.” 
You don’t really have anything else to say to that. You’re sure you can handle yourself if you’re left alone for a few minutes while Taehyung says hi, but you actually find yourself rather appreciative of his resolve to look after you. Or, at least, make sure someone else is looking after you. It’s quite… chivalrous. Strikingly out of character for the Taehyung you’ve become well-acquainted with over the past couple of months. 
By the time you arrive, it’s obvious that Taehyung was right about there being so many people you two practically don’t even exist. Other than the herds of camera crews waiting outside the joint, photographing everyone that steps out of a black car to see what they’re wearing and who they’ve come with, no one seems to be paying you any attention. And in a way, that sort of nonexistence, that anonymity, it’s refreshing. Your entire life you’ve felt like all eyes were on you, like there was constantly a spotlight above your head, but here, the party centers around someone else. 
Despite that fact, Taehyung keeps his promise. He keeps himself pressed closely against you when there’s not enough space for you two to stand side by side, and he makes sure to have a hand gently intertwined with your own as you weave your way through the dozens of bodies in the room. He doesn’t say anything, of course, always looking up and forward instead of beside him, where you stand, but you find that you’re actually quite relaxed with his presence. He spots a bit of a clearing near the back of the first floor of the club, where a whole bunch of leather couches are pressed up against the brick walls, where the two of you can take a breather. 
“Damn, Clarissa knows a lot of people,” you say when you finally settle down, happily plucking a martini from a tray held by one of the many caterers wandering through the venue. 
“I doubt she’s even spoken to half of them,” Taehyung comments. “She and I have maybe spoken once… three years ago.”
“It was enough to get you invited, wasn’t it?” You point out with an eyebrow raised. 
Taehyung nods, chuckling a little. “Touché,” he says, clinking his own cocktail glass against yours. 
You take a swig of the drink, letting it wash down your throat. You’re not exactly sure how else you’re supposed to survive the night. “You must enjoy this, huh?” You muse, looking up at Taehyung from where you’re seated on the couch. He’s standing next to you, looking around the room with a distant gaze in his eye. 
“Enjoy what? The drink? It’s nice,” Taehyung says, having another sip. 
“No, I mean this,” you say, motioning toward the crowd. “The clubbing, the dancing, the drinking. I’ll bet that if you could do this every day for the rest of your life, you would.”
“I’m honored that you think so highly of me,” he deadpans. 
“Just making an observation,” you say, holding your hand up in surrender. “I mean, isn’t this what you used to do every weekend before we got married? Get wasted and party? Wake up in someone else’s bed the next morning? Muscle your way through the week just so you could do it all over again?”
Taehyung shakes his head, a knowing grin on his face. “Looks like someone keeps up with her tabloids. Let me guess, you would scroll through all of those trashy articles on your phone whenever you woke up so you could see what your future husband was doing?”
“I could have never even met you and I would know that that’s exactly what you do,” you say, even though you definitely did do those things before your engagement was announced to the public. “You’re a heartbreaker, Kim Taehyung. I don’t need to read a tabloid to know that.”
“Well, you must be quite the lucky girl, then,” Taehyung comments. “You seem to be taking up so much of my energy that I don’t have the time for that anymore.”
You place a sarcastic hand on your heart. “I didn’t know you were always thinking about me. I’m touched.”
“Don’t get used to it,” Taehyung huffs out, making the two of you both shake your heads as you chuckle to yourselves. First civil conversation you’ve had with each other in a long while, even if there may have been a few blows exchanged. 
The privacy doesn’t last long. Soon after, a huge crowd of people that could honestly still pass for teenagers herds towards the back of the club, all of them wanting to take pictures with each other. You and Taehyung do your best to stay out of the way, but one of the girls recognizes him from the Elle photoshoot he did about a year ago and begins to strike up a conversation with the both of you about your recent marriage. If she was paying attention to anything the tabloids leaked three weeks ago, she doesn’t mention it. Taehyung smiles and happily answers all of her questions, and even offers to take a picture of the group for them. The conversation ends before the two of you even catch her name. 
You’re standing by the line of buffet tables laid out against the staircase leading up to the second floor, no doubt as crowded as this one, when the opportunity for you to speak to someone other than Taehyung finally presents itself. 
“Y/N!”
You’d recognize that voice anywhere. You turn around to see Victoria barreling towards the both of you, not even caring when she accidentally spills a bit of her piña colada on the floor as she does. 
“Hey!” You exclaim excitedly. “I didn’t know you’d be here.”
“Are you kidding? I’m pretty sure Clarissa invited everyone on her, her best friend’s, her best friend’s cousin, and her best friend’s cousin’s dog’s contact list,” Victoria says with a laugh. “It’s nice to see you. I feel like you’ve been holed up in that big ol’ penthouse for weeks.”
“Damage control,” you remind her succinctly. Victoria knows enough that that’s all the explanation she really needs. 
“I don’t know if the two of you have ever met formally,” you say, thinking back to your wedding, where Victoria spent most of her time schmoozing with your parents (who love her) and didn’t even engage with any of the people who Taehyung’s family had invited. “Taehyung, this is Victoria. Victoria, Taehyung.”
“Pleasure,” Victoria says in that loud, unabashedly forward way of hers, holding out a friendly hand. Taehyung smiles back curtly, taking her hand and shaking it gently, so as not to spill any more of her drink. 
“Mine as well. I remember you were at our wedding.” Oh? So he does know her?
“That I was. Oh, I miss that day. The food was excellent. Tonight’s isn’t too bad either. Hope you’re doing well, the two of you. It’s nice to see you getting along,” she says, always the observer. 
Taehyung’s eyes widen a little when he picks up what Victoria is not-so-subtly putting down, but you place a hand on his upper arm to calm him. “It’s okay,” you tell him. “She won’t say anything.”
“My lips are sealed,” Victoria adds. 
“If you wanna go spend time with some of your friends, you can,” you say, giving Taehyung a nudge. He looks positively helpless standing in between the two of you as Victoria out-extroverts him. 
“Alright,” he says hesitantly, even though you know he’s already spotted at least ten people you’re sure he’d want to spend time with over you. “I’ll come find you soon, okay? Don’t go too far.”
You nod, and Taehyung disappears off into the crowd. Not two seconds later, you hear someone else call his name in a familiar tone. 
“I thought you said you hated him,” Victoria points out as the two of you watch his caramel brown hair makes its way throughout the crowd. 
You take another sip of your drink. “I do,” you say. 
Victoria looks at you like you’ve just told her you’ve sworn off custard-filled doughnuts. 
“What?” You ask, feeling suddenly defensive. 
“Nothing,” Victoria singsongs. “It just doesn’t look like that to me.”
“We just need to keep up a good appearance in public, that’s all. You know how mad my parents got when the tabloids leaked all that shit a few weeks ago,” you explain. You’re not sure what all the fuss is about. Taehyung said he would do these things. And he did. That was him upholding his end of the deal. This is you upholding yours. 
“If you say so…” Victoria says, not looking at all convinced. “I guess I’m just surprised that—that you two seem to be getting along so well. Maybe you being married isn’t going to be the worst thing after all.”
You stare back out into the crowd, scanning the top of people’s heads for Taehyung’s familiar locks. In the dim light of the club, you have a difficult time finding his, squinting your eyes slightly as you look around, but eventually you spot him, dancing happily with some old friends of his you recognize. He looks like he’s having a good time. And that makes you feel like maybe, just maybe, this might end up alright. 
“Yeah,” you say, though with the pounding of the bass and the alcohol already rushing through your veins, it doesn’t really feel like your voice belongs to you. You look back at Taehyung, knowing exactly where he is now, and you smile. Just a little. “I guess he’s not so bad.”
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You never do get a chance to meet Taehyung’s friends that night. By the time he joins back up with you and Victoria he’s by himself, a little more drunk than when he left, and ready to go home. And for once, instead of fighting him, instead of insisting you stay an hour more just to make sure you’ve done all of your rounds, you let him take you home. 
Taehyung has been spending a lot more time at the penthouse lately. Perhaps his family’s business happenings are slow, or perhaps he’s actually starting to get more comfortable with inhabiting the same space as you, but he has definitely found himself quite the rhythm in that house of yours. He even comes down to the first floor rather regularly. 
When he’s home, Taehyung is a lot quieter than you thought he would be. Granted, you don’t exactly know what you were expecting in the first place, but it certainly wasn’t him ruminating in one of the home offices while the Beatles play softly on the stereo, nor was it him reading a book in French in one of those big old grandfather chairs in the living room. If you didn’t know any better, you’d probably think he was still absent in that old way of his, ghostlike and silent, like he was occupying the space instead of truly living in it. 
But you do know better, and even though Taehyung is just as noiseless as he used to be, the house already feels a little bit fuller. 
Perhaps the reason you’ve become so keenly aware of his presence over the past few days is because of the notable fact that Taehyung has indeed held up his end of the deal, and no longer goes out with his friends in the evening. Or at all, for that matter. Which strikes you as rather odd, because he’s the epitome of a social butterfly, a thousand contacts in his phone and a whole group of friends he regularly spends time with. Maybe his parents told him to tone down the public appearances, too. And that’s understandable, but don’t they know Taehyung? Can’t they see how much he thrives on social interaction? It almost makes you feel… bad for him. 
To remedy this, you suggest he invite over his friends. Just for a few hours, you swear you won’t mind. 
“Seriously?” Taehyung looks positively shocked when you tell him he can, standing in the doorway of the office he seems to have designated as his own. 
“Yeah, why not?” You say with a carefree shrug. Besides, you’ve never met his friends anyway, and now seems as good a chance as any to introduce yourself. You are his wife, after all. “Unless your parents say you can’t. But it’s not a problem for me.”
“You… don’t mind if I have my friends over for a bit? Honest to God, we’re probably just going to play FIFA for three hours straight,” Taehyung says like it’s some sort of warning. Like the idea of him and his buddies from college are going to sit in the living room screaming at the television, leaving you alone to do literally anything else, is somehow bad. 
You laugh. “It’s fine, really. Call them. I’d actually quite like to meet them.”
Taehyung picks up his phone almost instantly, as if you’ll change your mind in the next five minutes so he better get them over soon, and already you can see the way his face is lighting up, the way his eyes crinkle as he chats to his friends and the way his lips curl upwards when they crack a joke back. Isn’t it obvious? He feeds off of the energy of others. Who are you to deny him such a simple pleasure?
As it turns out, Taehyung’s friends actually end up being quite nice anyway. 
He invites over three, because four people is apparently the perfect number for a hardcore game of FIFA on his Playstation, and they are all very handsome men you have never met before. You suppose like attracts like, after all. 
“You must be Y/N,” says the first one you see when you open the door to let them in. He doesn’t look a day over twenty-one—in fact, he could probably still pass as a college student—and has rather long dark hair that drapes over the sides of his face, covering the edges of his big doe eyes. “I’m Jungkook. This is Jimin and Hoseok.”
“Nice to meet you all,” you say, stepping aside so they can enter.
The shortest one, Jimin, grins in response, and Hoseok, behind him, gives you a wave. It’s refreshing enough as is, not having to exchange formal greetings and shake each other’s hands like you do with everyone else. Hoseok even gives you a bit of a nod, too.“You, too,” he says. “We’ve heard so much about you.”
Oh, have they, now? Interesting. 
“All good things, I hope,” you say awkwardly, forcing a small smile as Taehyung comes bounding into the room, ears perked up at the sound of his friends’ voices. 
“Definitely. Thanks for having us over. We didn’t wanna intrude on the sanctity of your new place,” Jungkook says, gesturing vaguely to the house as a whole. He’s got this excellent, genuine grin on his face, the kind that people who are just happy to be alive always wear. 
Already he’s said enough to charm the shit out of you. Who knew Taehyung’s friends could be so… friendly? “Please, you’re welcome any time. I was just thinking Taehyung was getting a little lonely.”
“There he is!” Jimin shouts excitedly when he spots Taehyung behind the two of you, looking a lot more casual than he normally does when he’s alone with you, having abandoned his usual silky button-down and wide-leg slacks for a loose shirt and some sweatpants. You didn’t even know he had those things in his closet. 
“Hey, everyone’s here!” Taehyung exclaims, just as happy. He squeezes past you to give the three of them a big hug, and it almost makes you feel like you’re intruding on something you shouldn’t be in. Even though this is literally your house. 
“Nice place you got here,” Hoseok comments, eyes drifting around the living room. “Very minimalist, I like it.”
“Sure hope you don’t spill anything on those nice leather couches of yours,” Jungkook says. 
“Yeah, unlike Kook, who has spilled tomato soup on every shirt he’s ever owned,” Jimin jokes, earning laughs from Taehyung and Hoseok and a punch from Jungkook. 
“Moved after we married,” Taehyung says simply, shrugging his shoulders. It’s an easy enough explanation for why it doesn’t look at all lived in. Here’s hoping none of them realize you sleep in different bedrooms. 
“Yeah, congratulations on that, man,” Hoseok says, giving Taehyung a celebratory nudge in the shoulder. “Who’d have thought, out of the four of us, Kim Taehyung would be the first one to settle down.”
The way Taehyung’s body tenses up at that comment does not go unnoticed by you. 
“Seriously, I would have never guessed,” Jimin adds on. “You’re showing us a new side of yourself, Tae. But I’m happy for you.”
Normally, you’d probably take offense at such blatant insinuations that your husband was a former playboy, especially from his equally noncommittal friends. But truthfully, it’s not like you were blind to Taehyung’s transgressions either. And what matters most is the fact that since it was announced publicly, you are the only woman he’s been seen with since your engagement. 
“Me too. You seem to really like her. I’m glad,” Jungkook pipes up, sending a smile your way. You definitely feel like you don’t belong in this conversation. “I think the two of you will be good for each other.”
“Yeah, I hope so,” Taehyung says with a nervous chuckle. His eyes quickly shoot your way, the two of you meeting gazes, your hesitant expressions matching. At least the two of you are on the same page. “Alright, alright, enough,” Jungkook says. “Who’s ready to get their ass kicked in FIFA?”
“You’re on, Jeon. But when I win, you owe me a five-star dinner,” Hoseok challenges. 
“Deal.”
Hoseok, Jimin, and Jungkook immediately crowd towards the couch, and you take that as your cue to leave. But before you can disappear down the hallway, you and Taehyung look awkwardly at each other, hands tied. It’s not like you can say anything to them. 
The truth is that, sometimes, it’s easy to forget that not everyone else knows that your marriage is just for business. Sometimes it’s easy to forget that there are still people out there that believe you marry for love. 
Isn’t it crazy to think that you used to be one of those people, too?
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“Hey,” Taehyung says when you meet up at the bottom of the stairs again. 
“Hey,” you respond. 
“You look nice.”
You scoff a little to yourself. What, are you exchanging compliments now? “Thanks,” you say, looking him up and down. “You’re not so bad yourself.” Like he ever is. 
“I knew you had taste,” Taehyung teases, and it’s the sort of comment that would have earned him a melon ball to the face back when the two of you were teenagers at a debutante ball, but today only earns him a roll of your eyes as you join hands. You don’t have anything big tonight—just a small dinner to celebrate some sort of business accomplishment for your family, which means that all you have to manage is not ending up in some sort of food fight by the end of the night. 
“I didn’t have a choice, did I?” You retort easily as you get into the car. 
You don’t normally speak a lot on the way to events. Not that you ever did, but even as your relationship has slowly faded from pure hatred to attempts at compromise, you both seem to relish in being able to stare out of your respective backseat windows and into the city that surrounds you. Just out of curiosity, about halfway through the ride you look towards Taehyung to see what he’s up to, and find yourself genuinely surprised to see him leaning against the window with his eyes closed. Is he sleeping? A couple more minutes of gazing at him tells you he is, because his body has gone lax and his breathing has evened out, soft snores leaving his mouth. This ride can’t be longer than twenty minutes. Has he not been sleeping well? Up in that enormous second-floor bedroom of his?
He’s awake by the time the car parks outside the restaurant, this fancy name brand steak place that was chosen solely because the biggest beneficiaries of your family’s new business deal are two sixty-year-old men whose entire diet consists of beef and beer. No cameras tonight, just a small family affair. You and Taehyung hold hands as you enter the restaurant and are led to the private room in the back anyway. 
You and him are seated on the far end of the long, rectangular table, alongside all of the other adult children dragged along to celebrate something that has no effect on their lives. But it’s nice, because the space alone prevents your parents from actively speaking with you, and you and Taehyung can stay in your own little bubble, only chiming in for a toast when necessary. 
“What are you going to get?” He asks you, the two of you gazing at the menu. No matter how fancy this place is, all the options seem to boil down to steak, steak, steak, steak, and caesar salad. Classic. 
“Oh, so you actually care now?” You counter, an eyebrow raised in amusement. 
Taehyung laughs. “Aren’t I supposed to?”
You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously, wise to his usual shenanigans. It’s hard to tell if Taehyung really means what he says, or if it’s all for show. But perhaps he’s asking because he’s genuinely curious, since no one else seems to be paying you any attention. 
“The choices on this menu are simply overwhelming,” you say, motioning to the six options in front of you. 
“I know, I’m so torn,” Taehyung jokes, making you huff out a little giggle. At least he’s still got that same sense of humor. 
You both end up going for a pretty classic steak dinner, which neither of the two of you finish because the damn portions are the size of your head. Dinner is, in and of itself, absolutely mindless, all of your parents talking about things that don’t concern you whatsoever, leaving you and Taehyung to your own devices as you desperately try to make the night go by faster. 
At one point, you notice Taehyung’s foot brushing up against yours, the leather of his loafers brushing against the toe of your patent heel. Thinking someone of it, you push back, foot nudging his back to his own chair. It’s not a second later that Taehyung retaliates, the two of you dancing around each other underneath the table. 
If the two of you were any younger, or perhaps any less resigned to your fate, there’s no doubt in your mind you would be attempting to get Taehyung to fall off his chair in an effort to do the same to you. Footsie means war. But when the both of you know that, at the end of the day, you’ll still be going home to the same place, and waking up the next morning in the same house, it doesn’t feel like this is a battle.
It’s just life. 
Eventually, you meet Taehyung’s eyes with a hesitant smile, shoe pressed against his, stuck in ceasefire. And for once, he doesn’t have that devilish look in his eye, that smug little grin on his face that tells you that he’s going to make you regret whatever it is you just did. He’s just smiling back at you, all pink lips, having found real fun in the little things. 
And that makes you happy. 
The rest of the dinner is uneventful, which, in your book, is about as good as a dinner can go. You cheers to the future of your parents’ relationship with their newfound partners and say a quick goodbye to them both, hurrying out of there before they can ask you any questions on your relationship with your husband. But you don’t spend the car ride in silence on the way back. 
Instead, you say, “Have you been sleeping well?”
The question seems to catch Taehyung off guard. He was already getting in position to take a power nap on the ride home, head pressed up against the window of the car. 
“What?”
“Have you been sleeping well?” You repeat. “I noticed you fell asleep on the way here.”
“Huh? Oh, yeah, I guess,” he says, a hand scratching the nape of his neck. “I mean, it’s been hard adjusting, I suppose. But I’ll get over it.”
Hard adjusting? You’ve been together for nearly three months now. Three months worth of sleeping in the same penthouse bedroom, on the same soft-as-a-cloud mattress, underneath the same weighted blanket. And he’s still having trouble? 
“Oh. I mean, I just wanted to ask because you seem really tired lately.”
“I got a lot on my plate, what can I say,” Taehyung says with an empty smile, forcing a chuckle. “I’ll be fine, seriously. You don’t have to worry about me.”
“Isn’t that my job?” You remind him. “I am your wife.”
Taehyung doesn’t say anything to that. He just lets out an audible breath, the kind you let out when you’re amused and have something snarky to say, but don’t have the energy to get the words off your tongue. 
The rest of the ride is pretty quiet. 
When you get home, you place your house keys in the bowl by the entrance and take off your shoes, just about ready to take a hot shower and collapse in bed, when Taehyung’s voice stops you. 
“Hey,” he begins, almost hesitantly. You look back at him inquisitively. “I was thinking, maybe, if you wanted, we could start sleeping in the same bed?”
You scrunch your nose up. Not in disgust, but in surprise. In bewilderment. What brought this on, all of a sudden?
“Really?” You ask, because you can’t help yourself. “I thought we liked the separate bed thing. Gives us privacy.”
“Yeah,” Taehyung says with a shrug, “but—I don’t know, it’s stupid. I just thought, you know, since we’re married and all. And it’s been three months.” He looks about two seconds away from backtracking, from shaking his head and going upstairs before you can say anything else. 
“Alright,” you say quickly, nodding your assent. Taehyung’s eyes widen when he hears the word, like he had completely expected you to shut him down the moment he made the suggestion. “If that’s what you want. We can try it.”
“You sure?” He asks, that same hesitant smile from earlier lacing his features. It’s strange. He almost looks… sweet. Nervous. 
You grin back at him. “Yeah, I am.”
Taehyung lets you grab some of your toiletries and your pajamas from your designated bedroom before you head up the stairs together, towards the bedroom he’s claimed for himself. Funnily enough, this is the first time you’ve been in his room. Three months of living together and you haven’t dared step foot on the second floor. 
You don’t know what you were expecting when he opens the door to let you inside. Maybe a room that screamed ‘Taehyung’ a little more than this one does. One that looks like an actual human has been living here. But other than one of his classic silk button-downs draped over a chair, there’s not a shred of evidence someone has actually been sleeping here. You could honestly be fooled rather easily that the shirt, too, is just decoration. 
“You can pick a side,” Taehyung says casually. He grabs his own sleepwear—an old t-shirt and some sweats—and heads into the bathroom to change. 
You wonder why Taehyung has had such a difficult time adjusting. This room is about as lavish as a bedroom can get. And yet. 
Sitting down on the left side of the bed, you begin to remove your own clothes, unzipping tonight’s dress and stepping quickly into your pajamas, hurrying to make sure Taehyung doesn’t catch you half-naked. How funny is that, you think to yourself. You’ve been married for three months and you still can’t bear the thought of Taehyung seeing you without a shirt on. 
When Taehyung comes out of the bathroom, hair all messy and clothes all casual, he grins lazily to himself. “I sleep on the right anyway,” he comments mindlessly. 
Within twenty minutes the both of you are about as ready to pass out as you have ever been, the only lights still on the ones on your respective nightstands. 
“Goodnight,” Taehyung says, reaching an arm over to switch his off. 
“Goodnight,” you tell him, turning off yours as well. And all of a sudden, the room is shrouded in darkness. 
You fall asleep instantly. 
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When Taehyung wakes up the next morning, the first thing he says to you is that he hasn’t slept that well in ages. 
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“You slept together?” Victoria shrieks, so loud you actually have to move your phone away from your ear as you punch in the code inside the elevator for access to your floor. 
“We did not sleep together,” you emphasize. “Okay, well, we sleep together, as in, in the same bed. But we are fully clothed. And not the slightest bit interested in doing anything other than sleeping.”
“I thought you said you liked having your own space,” Victoria points out. “When was the first time you—uh…” she pauses to find the right words, “shared a bed?”
“A couple weeks ago. It’s really not so bad, I don’t know why you’re so hung up over it,” you say, lips pursed. You squeeze the phone between the side of your head and your shoulder, hands full of shopping bags, the string of the handles burning your skin. Maybe you should look into getting a personal shopper. 
“I’m hung up over it because, for the longest time, you have sworn off Kim Taehyung. Called him dead to you. Insulted him every chance you get.” 
You scoff. You don’t need reminding of how much you hated him, how much you can’t believe you have to spend the rest of your life with him. “It’s different now. We’re married. And he said he wasn’t sleeping well. I felt bad.”
“He wasn’t?”
“Enough about him,” you say, shutting her up. You don’t feel like talking about him with Victoria anymore. “Word through the grapevine says that your parents are actually thinking of letting you start your own company?”
It’s enough to distract Victoria. For the rest of the ride in the elevator, she talks animatedly about a new streaming service her parents are considering letting her launch, under their parent business, of course, but it’s her own company nonetheless. And you’re proud of her. Proud she could do something your parents would never dream of letting you do. Proud she could make that happen. 
You push open the front door with the side of your hip after entering in the security code, phone still snug between your ear and your shoulder, when you hear Taehyung call out your name. 
He comes into view from the kitchen, which surprises you because you have, on multiple occasions, made fun of how much of a disaster chef he is, especially because he’s admitted to you he’s not a very good cook. 
“I made brownies,” he says, holding out a plate of the chocolate treats in front of you. Instinct has you dropping your bags on the floor by your feet and reaching out, but you eye him first, suspicious. 
“I have to go,” you tell Victoria, hanging up before she even gets a chance to object to your sudden departure. “You made these?”
“Yes, I did,” Taehyung says, rather proud. 
“And the kitchen is… still standing?” You ask, skeptical. 
Taehyung frowns at you, clearly unimpressed. “How bad of a chef do you think I am?”
“Pretty bad,” you admit with a shrug. 
Taehyung pouts sadly to himself for a moment. “These are good, I swear. Nothing weird in them like vegetables or anything either. I used a box mix.”
“No wonder they look so nice,” you comment snidely, hesitant hand reaching out to grab one. They feel like brownies. So that’s good. 
“Hey, I was the one who had to crack the eggs and shit. Three eggs! And not one eggshell in the bowl!” Taehyung says, clearly very pleased with himself. 
You laugh at his enthusiasm, taking a bite. It’s good. And exactly what you needed after a long day of shopping. “I’m proud of you. They taste good.”
“I knew you wouldn’t doubt me.” Taehyung grins.
“They’re really good, actually,” You amend, genuinely surprised. And the best part is that you can count at least ten brownies left on that plate, which means that you get at least five more. Which, if you had any less self-restraint, you would probably eat all at once within the day. 
“I’m glad you like them. They’re all for us, you know. No one else to share them with,” he says.
“Honestly, I’m probably going to finish them by tonight. You’ll have to make more tomorrow,” you say sheepishly. 
“We can make some together,” Taehyung suggests. 
“I’m looking forward to it,” you respond. The words come off your mouth easily, tumbling from your lips without you having to think about it. You aren’t saying them because you have to. You’re saying them because you want to. Because baking with Taehyung doesn’t actually sound too bad. Especially if it means more brownies. 
“You’ve, uh, you’ve got something,” Taehyung says, gesturing vaguely to the side of his lip. 
“Oh, I do? Yikes,” you say, a little embarrassed. Your hand comes up to wipe at the left side of your mouth. “Is it gone?”
“Wait, here, let me do it,” Taehyung says, reaching out towards you. He presses his palm against the side of your face, cradling your cheek and jaw in his enormous hands, and all at once it feels like your skin is on fire. 
Your body freezes up at the touch, at the way his thumb swipes at the corner of your mouth, right against your lips, wiping away nothing but a goddamn brownie crumb. You look at him, look right at him, how can you look anywhere else when he’s right in front of you like this, and it feels like you are caught in his gaze, a rain droplet trapped on a web, a bee stuck in its own honey. His big, brown eyes sparkle from the ceiling lights, a chocolate sky that mirrors the food he just made for you. He looks at you and his eyes are so soft, so open, so happy to be looking right back at you. God. 
“There,” he says, a moment too late. 
“Thanks,” you stammer out, speechless otherwise. 
You both stand there, looking at each other, wordless expressions drawn all over your faces, no idea what to do next. 
After a while, Taehyung breaks the silence. “Do you wanna order takeout tonight?”
“Okay,” you nod, still a little breathless. Taehyung smiles before retreating back to the kitchen, leaving you standing in the entranceway, shopping bags abandoned by your side. 
You look over to where he’s vanished. There’s a part of you that wishes he hadn’t left. A part of you that makes you want to see him again. 
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Phone calls from your mother are never good. The last time she called… well, you know how that went. So when you see her contact information light up your home screen, it’s only instinct that you feel your heart rate spike. 
“Hello?” The voice that comes out doesn’t even sound like yours. 
There’s no good way to put what comes next. Your grandmother has died. Heart attack. The paramedics got there too late. It was over before it even started. 
For a moment, for a split second, it feels like everything is frozen. Like the world has come to standstill. Your mother’s voice echoes in your ears, suspended in time, the words turning into stone as they crash onto the floor. And when they do, it is as if everything comes back to life. 
Truth be told, you don’t know how long you stay there, sitting on the edge of the left side of the bed, your phone resting lifelessly in the palm of your hand. It feels at once like an eternity and only a second in time. You spoke to your grandmother two days ago. You had promised that you and Taehyung would visit her soon. How can this be happening?
Your phone buzzes relentlessly in your hands, condolences pouring in from every person in your contacts, sorry’s and heart emoticons and If you need anything, I’m always here’s filling up your screen. There’s a part of you that vaguely registers your mother, alongside some of the other members of your family, trying to call you. But nothing can seem to shake you. 
Until—
“Y/N? You still up here?”
You hear Taehyung before you see him. Hear his voice, hear his footsteps, hear the door creak open as he enters your bedroom. Slowly, almost sluggishly, you twist around to look at him, the mere act knocking the wind out of you. Or maybe you were already breathless. 
“Hey, you alright?” Taehyung knows instantly that something is wrong. 
“My grandmother died.” The words sit heavy on your tongue. There’s no point in not telling him. He’ll find out soon enough. He’s… he’s family, isn’t he?
“What?” Taehyung freezes in place. “I—I’m so sorry to hear that, Y/N. Are you okay?”
“I’m fine,” you say, voice weak but steady. You blink up at him, once, twice, three times, and then suddenly you feel tears running down your cheeks. 
Taehyung doesn’t say anything else. He rushes to your side and sits himself down on the bed next to you, arms wrapping around your body. And you don’t think about the fact that it’s him, about the fact that this is the closest the two of you have ever been. You just let yourself be engulfed in his frame, let yourself be enveloped in his hold as the tears stream down your skin, little hiccups jolting your throat. You close your eyes and press yourself into his arms, head resting against his chest, and wish so desperately that so many things about your life were just a little bit different. 
It must be at least five minutes before either one of you dares to move. Your phone begins to rattle incessantly, that familiar and insistent buzz that the both of you are hard-pressed to ignore. 
“I think you should answer that,” Taehyung whispers into your skin, lips right by your forehead. 
“Yeah,” you sniffle, sitting up next to him and wiping the remnants of wetness by your eyes. Well, Taehyung’s seen you cry. There’s no going back now. “You’re probably right.” You look down at the phone. It’s your father. 
“I’ll be downstairs, okay? Unless you want me to stay,” he offers, looking hesitant. 
You shake your head. “No, it’s—it’s okay. I’ll be fine.”
“Call me if you need me,” he makes you give him a nod of understanding before he finally gets up, hands slowly removing themselves from your skin, leaving little sparks in their wake. Remnants of warmth. Suddenly, you feel much colder. Hardly a minute later he’s out of the room, and you can hear his distant footsteps as they make their way down the stairs. 
Sighing, blinking, and swallowing all at once, you pick up. 
The call passes by in a blur. Your father says the will will take at least half a year to be executed, but that the funeral is already being planned. Your grandmother had hoped you would eulogize her. You agree, but you have no idea what you will say. He says Taehyung is invited but does not need to come if he cannot make it. He says a lot of other things too, about your mother, about your cousins, about your aunts and uncles and your poor grandfather, who passed five years ago, but you can’t even remember them moments after he’s said them. 
When he hangs up, the tears on your cheeks have dried, patches of them left along your skin. You head to the bathroom, getting off your bed for the first time that day, and try to wash away everything that has stained the morning. A part of you doesn’t even want to bother, just wants to slug downstairs and eat as much sugary cereal as you can get your hands on, but you can’t go down there looking like this. Looking so helpless. 
By the time you reach the kitchen, Taehyung is already standing there, on the opposite side of the counter island, a big stack of pancakes in front of him. They look mouth-watering. 
“Hey,” he says softly. “Thought you might want something to cheer you up.”
“Did you make these?” You ask, a little endeared. That was thoughtful of him. 
“Yeah. They’re still warm,” Taehyung says. He holds out a fork. 
You grin. 
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The funeral is a week later. It sucks in every way that something can suck. But not in the same way your wedding sucked, or even the announcement of your engagement. It sucks because it’s a funeral, because you have to stare down your grandmother’s casket when a part of you still doesn’t even believe that she’s gone. Because everyone there is so sad, so melancholy, dressed in all black and looking down at their feet. Because everyone is so sorry for you, so sorry for your loss, everyone has nothing but condolences to offer you. What will those do? They won’t bring her back. They won’t change things. They won’t make you feel even the slightest bit better. 
Taehyung comes. He comes because he offers, and because you want him to. You want someone whose hand to hold. Want someone to smile at you when you’re speaking in front of your entire extended family and trying not to cry. You want someone who is familiar, and warm, and there for you. 
And most of all, you want someone who won’t keep the conversation going when you get home. 
“Do you wanna order Chinese?” He asks, coming into the living room, where you have been sulking on the couch ever since you stepped foot inside the door. 
“That sounds nice,” you force out. 
“Okay. Your usual?”
“Yes, please.” You don’t bother asking how Taehyung already remembers what you like to order when you’ve only gotten Chinese twice in the last three months. 
“I’ll call them.” He disappears off into the kitchen. 
What you do appreciate about Taehyung is how he has defaulted to food as a comfort measure, and how the thought alone genuinely brightens you up a little bit. You don’t know each other very well—still, after three months, you couldn’t even say his favorite color—but he is doing his best, and he is trying his hardest. In some ways, you were unlucky to marry him. To marry someone you didn’t love. To be forced into a union you had no say in, with someone you had so much antagonistic history with. 
But in some ways, your luck has changed. In some ways, marrying him was perhaps the best thing that could happen to you. Taehyung is snarky, a little devilish, and absolutely full of himself, but he is not thoughtless. He is not heartless. He has proven that he is willing to put in the work. That he can grow to care. To change. To compromise. And isn’t that the luckiest thing you could have gotten?
“I’m sure you’re probably sick of hearing people tell you they’re sorry for your loss.”
His voice breaks your reverie, carrying throughout the wide open space of your living room. He’s grinning honestly where he stands, slowly making his way over to you. 
“Kind of, yeah,” you admit. “It’s not going to bring her back. Most of those people probably don’t even mean it.”
“Don’t say that,” Taehyung says, sitting down next to you. “I’m sure they do.”
You look at him skeptically. 
“I mean, they’re sorry for your loss because that loss is causing you pain. And that sucks,” Taehyung explains, albeit a little less eloquently than you thought he would. “I know it sucks for me.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t like seeing you sad,” Taehyung says honestly, shrugging to himself. 
You scoff a little to yourself. “I would have thought my downfall would be the exact thing the great Kim Taehyung would wish for himself.”
“Maybe a couple of years ago.”
You narrow your eyes. 
“Okay, maybe even a few months ago,” Taehyung admits with a laugh, making you smile, ever so slightly. “But it’s different now. I like it when you’re happy. When you’re snarky and funny and a little evil. Seeing you like this… I don’t like the way it makes me feel.”
“That’s called empathy,” you point out. 
“I’m trying to tell you that seeing you sad makes me sad, stop being a smartass,” Taehyung chides, and that really makes you grin. “There. There’s that smile I was looking for.”
“You’re so annoying,” you say, even though there’s no malice behind it. You give him a little push, palms of your hand pressing lightly against his shoulder as you roll your eyes. 
“Only for you,” he promises. He manages to grab a hold of your wrist as your hand meets his torso, pulling you into him as he wraps an arm around your torso. You gasp a little at the sensation, head falling against his body, fitting snugly in the crook of his neck. He gives your side a comforting rub. “I’m sorry today was so shitty.”
“It was,” you agree. “But Chinese food will make it a little bit better.”
Taehyung looks positively scandalized. “What? ‘Chinese food will make it better’? But not your loving, doting husband?” 
You pretend to think for a little bit, tilting your head up to the sky as you tap your chin with your finger. “Okay. Maybe that, too,” you cave after a bit of waiting, just to be extra bothersome. 
“That’s what I thought,” Taehyung says proudly, looking down at you, eyes sparkling. You can feel his grip tighten as he presses you against his body, letting you rest your head on his side. It feels like the longest hug ever, like you’re wrapped up in a weighted blanket. Only it’s not a blanket. It’s Taehyung. It’s your husband. 
He’s your husband.
“Tomorrow will be better,” he says, and it sounds a lot like a promise. 
You nod against him, letting your eyes drift shut. Things are pretty awful right now. Your grandmother’s dead. The funeral was the saddest family event you have ever attended. You have no idea what’s supposed to happen next. 
But he’s right. He seems to be right a lot these days, actually. 
Tomorrow will be better.
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Taehyung lets you sleep in for the next few days. Next several days, actually. Every time you wake up it’s close to noon and your husband is nowhere to be seen, the right side of the bed cold to the touch. It’s nothing to be worried about, though, because you can still see the noticeable dip in the bed from where he lies upon it, sinking his weight into the mattress. Taehyung’s an early bird and you’ve been having fitful nights ever since your grandmother passed. 
Today, you pull yourself out from underneath the covers around noon, sluggish and still tired, squinting as the near-afternoon light streams through the enormous windows of the bedroom. Taehyung must have thought to keep the curtains open today. 
You pull on the first casual clothes you see in your shared closet, some wide-leg sweatpants and a drapey t-shirt, and trudge downstairs like a raccoon to a trash can, hoping to fish through the kitchen cabinets to find something to eat. 
Taehyung is, as far as you can tell, nowhere to be seen. You can’t seem to hear him anywhere, and a part of you wonders where he’s at when you stumble upon the note left on the granite counter. 
Had a meeting downtown, be back around 1! There should be smoked salmon and some cream cheese and bagels in the fridge. 
Taehyung.
You chuckle to yourself as you read his flowy handwriting, amused that he thought to let you know of, of all things, the available breakfast foods in the kitchen. You check the clock. It’s nearly noon. Which means you have just over an hour of the house all to yourself. 
Having the house to yourself for five minutes is infrequent enough as it is, let alone for a whole hour. So often is Taehyung around, somewhere, holing himself up in one of the dozens of rooms or mindlessly wandering down the hallways. And for how much Taehyung is present, the funny part is that you still have no idea what he gets up to most of the time. Despite your voluntary abandoning of the separate bedroom rule, the two of you are still firm proponents of the sanctity of your personal spaces. There are rooms in the penthouse Taehyung has never been in, rooms filled with your clothes and makeup and accessories for when stylists come over before an event. A sewing room that you had specifically asked your parents for, because a part of you never let go of that childhood dream of being a fashion designer. 
And there are rooms in the penthouse that you have never been in. Rooms with dark wooden doors that have always been kept closed, that you have never stepped foot in. It’s not that you aren’t curious as to what Taehyung gets up to. He could have a goddamn evil lair in one of those rooms and you would be none the wiser. But you don’t go, because he doesn’t go into your rooms. Because you two, despite all the vows you have broken, promised each other you wouldn’t.
An hour to yourself is almost a good enough excuse for you to head back up to the bedroom and take a nap. Not that you don’t get enough sleep on a regular basis, or that you even had a fitful night last night—hell, you woke up near noon today and already you want to go back to sleep—but what else is there to do when he’s not around? What new freedoms have suddenly been given to you?
You head back upstairs, much less groggy after that delicious bagel of yours, when you catch a whiff of what smells like wet paint coming from down the hallway. It’s potent and immediately invades your senses, prompting you to wonder if that has always been there, or just magically appeared. Maybe you were so sleepy earlier, you didn’t notice it. 
Well, you notice it now. Unable to help yourself, you start to wander down the hallway, towards the source of the smell. God, it stinks. It takes you back to those days in middle school, when you would spray paint projects inside a tiny little classroom, have to step outside for fifteen minutes while you cracked the windows and aired it out. It gets stronger the further down the corridor you go, like a thick, smelly cloud stationed firmly within the walls of the penthouse. And then you realize where it’s coming from. 
It’s an art studio. 
A very messy art studio, you amend to yourself, as you peek inside. The door is wide open, and all of the windows are popped too, but the extra air circulation doesn’t seem to have made a dent in the scent. And all over the floor, the walls, and the tables are canvases covered in paint, denim jackets and pants and shirts with these wide, unafraid brushstrokes. Open cans of spray paint lie discarded on the hardwood floor stained with splotches of red, yellow, and green. 
Is this what Taehyung does in his free time? Is this where he goes, this bright, sunny room at the end of the second floor hallway? Is this what he is making?
You look down in awe at the clothes resting on the floor, splayed out to maximize dry time. Abstract faces, landscapes, and words are painted onto the backs of jackets, the fronts of old white t-shirts. What hasn’t made it onto the clothes has been put on canvases instead, blurs of color mixed together in this purposeful pattern, confidence emanating from every stroke, every dot. It’s not art in the way that the gorgeous landscapes of Monet, the picture-perfect portraits of Kahlo, the messy, unplanned splatters of Pollock are. It’s art in a different way. In a Taehyung way. 
Who knew he loved it so much? 
You almost feel like an invader encroaching on his territory when you lean down to start cleaning up some of the mess, throwing out empty spray-paint cans and tossing out grey paint water. You don’t dare touch any of the work, don’t dare try to move it. You do what you can, washing out the brushes resting in the water and cleaning up the wet splotches of paint on the hardwood. Over time, the thick scent of still-wet paint slowly fades, disappearing out the window as the fresh afternoon air seeps in. And you stand there, in a room full of art, in a room full of pieces that Taehyung has undoubtedly poured his heart into creating, and you smile to yourself. 
That’s how Taehyung finds you ten minutes later, peering into the room after declaring that his meeting had ended early. 
“Thought I’d find you in here,” Taehyung says with a grin as you jump at the sound of his voice, eyes widen when you turn around to see him standing by the door. 
“Oh, hey,” you say sheepishly. “I didn’t hear you come in.”
“Maybe because this is the farthest room in the house from the front door,” Taehyung teases lightly, coming up behind you. “I see you found my studio.”
“I know I’m not allowed in here,” you admit. 
Taehyung scoffs. “Who says?”
“Didn’t we both agree on that?”
He shrugs. “Sort of. I think we just reached an unspoken understanding we wouldn’t invade each other’s personal space. But it was not in the fine print, no.”
“The fine print of what?”
“That deal we made.”
Right. That deal you made, four months ago, That deal, where the two of you agreed to pretend to be in love with each other during public appearances so you wouldn’t get burned at the stake by your families. Where the two of you agreed not to interact with each other otherwise because you hated each other so much. 
“Oh, yeah,” you say distantly, feeling naive for already forgetting about it. It doesn’t seem to have slipped Taehyung’s mind whatsoever. 
“It’s okay, I don’t mind that you’re up here,” Taehyung says, interrupting that piercing little voice in the back of your head that is asking you why on earth you forgot about that deal in the first place.
“Yeah, I—” You scratch at the nape of your neck, trying to find the words to say. “It just smelled like paint, so I wanted to see what you get up too. And it’s this, apparently.” You motion vaguely to the entire room.
“You sound… surprised,” Taehyung muses correctly. 
“I guess I am,” you surmise. “I’m rather impressed, too, actually.”
“Really?” It’s Taehyung’s turn to sound surprised. 
“Yeah,” you tell him honestly, looking into his eyes. “I—you know, I just came in here because the entire hallway smelled like wet paint and I wanted to know why. But I didn’t know you loved art so much.”
“There’s a lot you don’t know about me,” Taehyung points out. 
You suppose that’s true. You don’t know his favorite color. His favorite song. His favorite book. For a long time, you didn’t know what he got up to on his side of the penthouse. You don’t know how he met his friends. What he studied in university. Who he has loved in the past. Who he loves now. You don’t know why he does the things he does, and why he doesn’t do the things he doesn’t do. 
But you do know his Chinese takeout order. 
And you do know his hobbies. Well, one of them, at least. 
Who’s to say you can’t learn more?
“Well,” you start with a smile. “I’m your wife, aren’t I? Shouldn’t I begin to learn?”
Taehyung picks up what you’re putting down instantly, grinning in response. “Only if you’ll tell me things about you, too,” he requisitions. 
“I will,” you promise. It’s the easiest one you’ve ever had to make. 
His face is light, bright, bathed in the rays of the afternoon sun. His eyes shimmer as they meet yours, golden flecks more pronounced like this, in this gorgeous, open space, daylight streaming through the windows. Looking at him makes you feel like you are surrounded by warmth, makes you feel like the sun is opening its arms out to you. He has always been gorgeous. Beautiful. But looking at him like this, standing in the middle of a room filled with all the things he loves, a yellow halo surrounding him—he is ethereal. 
Taehyung smiles. “Then I will, too.”
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The hand-holding comes naturally tonight.
The funny thing is, actually, you don’t need to hold hands at this gathering. It’s not an event. Or a public appearance. It’s not even a business dinner. It’s your aunt’s sixtieth birthday party, reserved exclusively for family. Isn’t that strange? That Taehyung is, technically, family now?
For so long you had vowed to stay as far away from him as possible. Vowed to stick it to him whenever and wherever you could, do anything you could to get on his nerves, rile him up. Vowed that when you, one day, took over your family affairs, you would never, ever invite him. Make it known that he wasn’t to be a part of your life. And yet, here you are. Clinging to him despite being well-acquainted with—loved by, even—every other person in the room. Holding his hand like a goddamn lifeline. 
To be fair, Taehyung doesn’t look a hair out of place here. Dressed relatively casually, a smart sweater with a collared shirt underneath it, he smiles warmly at all of your relatives and presents your aunt with a beautiful and very expensive scarf the two of you had commissioned from a designer in Italy, which she absolutely loves. She pinches his cheek and proceeds to wear it for the rest of the night. 
“Damn,” you murmur to yourself as you wander around your aunt’s house, hand wrapped around his arm. “This place hasn’t changed a bit.”
“When was the last time you were here?” Taehyung asks. 
The question actually makes you think for a moment. “I don’t know, maybe five years ago? Last couple of birthdays I was overseas or in school. Had to send her a card.”
“Bet your parents were real pleased with that,” he jokes, making you both laugh. At least you two will always be able to share your experiences of domineering and influential parents with each other. 
“Oh, I’m sure. Just as pleased as they were when they realized how much we hated each other.” You expect that little jest to elicit a laugh out of Taehyung as well, but he just smiles tightly, huffing out a breath of acknowledgement. 
“Eh, it’s not like that now, is it?” He offers up. 
“I suppose not,” you muse, sitting down together on her ancient grandma couch in the living room. No matter how rich your family gets, she’ll never get rid of this thing, that’s for sure. 
One thing you’ve picked up over time is that, for every second Taehyung spends basking in the spotlight, he spends an equal amount of time lingering by the wall, watching the rest of the world turn without him. He’s an observer. He is one by nature, feeling an irresistible pull to understand humans in a way only artists could ever do. He sits down next to you and watches your family in an environment where they can relax, where they can feel comfortable and be casual with one another. 
Very seldom have you ever brought friends to events like these. Small family affairs. But Taehyung isn’t a friend, is he? No, he’s your husband. He belongs here just as much as you do. 
“My family seems to really like you,” you point out. Not that anybody has ever harbored as much disdain for him as you. Your parents called him respectable and polite when they told you you were to be wed. Your grandmother had said he was a dashing young man. He doesn’t exactly have to reach far to be loved around here. 
“That’s my job, isn’t it?” He replies snidely. 
“Oh, just take the compliment,” you say with a roll of your eyes. Taehyung always has to be so difficult. “I’m surprised you aren’t nervous as hell. Last boyfriend I brought to meet my parents was shaking in his Louis Vuitton shoes.”
“Last boyfriend, huh?” Taehyung’s interest has been sufficiently piqued. “And, uh, how many of those have you had?”
You narrow your eyes at him suspiciously, smile twitching on your lips. “Wouldn’t you like to know, Mr. Heartbreaker.” Pretty rich of Taehyung to be asking you such a question when he’s probably had more girlfriends than you can count on both hands. “Not as many as you’ve had girlfriends, that’s for sure.”
“Guess I’m a lot different than all those trashy guys you’ve dated, aren’t I?” He asks, an eyebrow raised as he looks at you. 
“You are?”
Taehyung nods assertively. “Well, yeah. First of all, I’m your husband. Second of all, your parents love me. Third of all, you love me, too.”
You scoff. “Don’t humble yourself. You don’t know me that well.”
“Speaking of which,” Taehyung says, eyes wide as he points to you knowingly, “how about you tell me a little fact about yourself? It’s my job to learn about you, isn’t it?”
“That is my line, watch it,” you sneer, pointing back at him. You wrack your brain for a fact that you can tell him, something more exciting than your favorite color but less weird than one of those terrible icebreaker exercises you had to do in college seminars. Something that has pertinence to who you are. Who you’ve become. “Alright. I used to want to be a fashion designer when I was little.”
Now that catches Taehyung off guard. “Really?” He says, genuinely intrigued. 
You shrug. “Yeah. I learned to sew when I was really little. Been tailoring and hemming clothes all my life. But I always wanted to design my own stuff.”
“Is that what’s in your room?” Taehyung asks. “A sewing machine?”
“Bingo.”
“Wow,” Taehyung says. “I didn’t know that.”
“Isn’t that the whole point of this exercise?” You say, just to be smart. 
Taehyung shakes his head, eyes rolling. 
“What about you?” You ask. You can’t imagine what he’ll say. Astronaut. Veterinarian. Or, if he really wants to surprise you, a business executive. 
“A museum curator.”
It is an answer that simultaneously surprises and doesn’t surprise you at all. 
“Fitting,” you muse. “You could have put your own art on display.”
“Pretty sure that’s, like, super unethical,” Taehyung reminds you. 
“So? You’re rich. Start your own museum. Put your own art on display. Live your dream,” you amend. “It shouldn’t be holed up in that studio of yours forever. It deserves to be seen.”
Taehyung smiles at you. “You think so?”
You nod. “Of course. You create beautiful things, Tae.” It’s the first time you’ve ever called him that. And that is not lost on Taehyung, either.
“Thank you,” he says softly, blinking as he looks at you. He doesn’t say anything else. He doesn’t need to.
Later that night, when everyone’s gotten a few drinks into their systems and Bruce Springsteen is playing low on the stereo, Taehyung disappears off towards the bathroom, no doubt because of the excellent soup that was served that night. All by your lonesome, you feel a little stranded, surrounded by your old relatives dancing on the hardwood floor of the dining room, your other cousins too young to actually spend time with. 
In the commotion, your mother comes up to you, swirling a rather large glass of red wine in her hand. 
“Where’s Taehyung?” She asks. 
“Bathroom.”
“No wonder you were alone,” she says with a hearty laugh. “The two of you have been glued to each other’s sides all evening.”
“He’s my husband,” you offer as an explanation. 
“I know, I know,” she says, shaking you off with a smile. Your mother is a lot more casual once she’s had her fill of wine, no doubt her favorite, Bordeaux. A lot more loving, too. “You really made your grandmother proud, you know? She loved you so much.”
“I know,” you say, trying not to get choked up at the mere mention of your grandmother. 
“She was so happy to see you with Taehyung. It made her feel safe that you would be taken care of,” she continues on, barely paying you and your swimming eyes any attention. “She would be so happy to see you with him now, too. How much you love her.”
“I miss her,” you hiccup out, trying to compose yourself. Nothing kills a birthday party like some sad sack crying over her deceased grandmother. 
“I know, darling,” your mother says, calling you by a nickname she has hardly used ever since you turned eighteen. She squeezes you tightly, a small hug of comfort. “I miss her, too.”
Someone calls your mother’s name, distracting her as she wanders off to your uncle, who is asking what the best way to cut the three-tiered cake on the dining room table is. She bids you a goodbye before disappearing towards the kitchen, no doubt ready to make the cutting of the cake an affair all on its own. 
Taehyung comes back soon after, spotting you instantly as you stand around in the living room. 
“Hey,” he says, noticing the wet shimmer of your eyes. “You alright?”
You nod, feeling better already now that he has returned. Now that he is by your side. “Yeah, I’m fine.”
“I hope those tears aren’t because you missed me,” he says, wiping away a stray one that has escaped from your eyes. You close them as his thumb brushes against your upper cheek, your eyelashes, opening them only when you’ve felt his touch vanish from your skin, leaving little sparks in their wake. 
“No,” you say. But the night makes you honest, and a couple of drinks, even more so. “But I’m glad you’re here.”
Taehyung smiles. “Me, too.”
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For all those days you have spent together, never have you and Taehyung had a night in. Which isn’t necessarily completely surprising, considering how many evening events the two of you have had obligations to attend, considering your differing work schedules and meeting times. Considering that, for a very long time, the two of you had no desire to spend any time with each other at all. 
But tonight, there is nothing on your calendar. No galas, no dinners, no meetings, no schedules. There is only Taehyung, who has spent the entire afternoon up in his studio, inhaling spray paint fumes and doing what he loves. And there is only you, who has spent the entire afternoon wondering what the hell you’re going to do tonight when there is nothing else planned. 
You knock on the door to his studio, catching him right as he’s finishing up another piece. This one is a single flower, painted in broad, confident strokes, bright green and red and sunflower yellow decorating the canvas. 
“Hey, what’s up?” He asks, turning around to face you. 
“Wanna order takeout tonight?” You suggest. 
Taehyung grins. 
Thirty minutes and your favorite Chinese food later, you and Taehyung have settled onto the couch, trays of dumplings and noodles and rice in front of you, an unfunny movie playing in the background. 
You can’t remember the last time the two of you sat on this couch together. Maybe that night you had made the deal? Perhaps not even then. It wouldn’t at all surprise you if you found out that this was the very first time you and Taehyung have sat together on your couch, in your living room, in your house. So often is it occupied by others—Victoria, who sometimes comes over to ooh and ahh at your closet, Jimin, Jungkook, and Hoseok, who sit on this couch and play FIFA like it’s their job, your mother, when she wants to make herself at home in a place that doesn’t belong to her—but never you. Never you and him. 
“This is kinda nice, isn’t it?” You ask, swallowing a bite of dumpling. 
“Chinese food is always nice,” Taehyung responds over a mouthful of cold noodles. 
“Not that,” you say with a sigh, “this. Sitting together. Watching this shitty movie.”
“It’s not that shitty,” Taehyung tries to reason. On screen, the main character is getting pied in the face during some weird college fundraiser. “Okay, it’s a little shitty. But it’s good background noise, right?”
You nod halfheartedly. “I guess.” Silence. You take another bite of your dumpling, not really sure how to continue the conversation. “We don’t really get to do this a lot, you know? Sit and eat dinner and watch a movie together. Like a date.”
“We’re on a date now, are we?” Taehyung muses, eyeing you snarkily. 
“Isn’t that what this is?” You retort. 
He shrugs. “I suppose it is.”
“Tell me another fact about you,” you request, looking over to him where he sits on the opposite side of the couch. 
“About what?”
“Anything.”
Taehyung pauses, ponders for a moment. But he could never say anything wrong. Not when there is still so much you don’t know about him. Still so much you want to learn, so much you want to commit to memory. For so long you have stared at the planes of his face, the curve of his nose, the twinkle in those dark brown eyes. Those you will always remember. But what about who he is? What he loves? Those are things you still don’t know. 
“The very first time I met you,” Taehyung begins, “I asked Jimin what your name was.”
“When was that?” You ask. Despite you being someone who has spent the better part of the last several years vowing never to give Taehyung the time of day, you sure don’t remember when it all started. 
“That debutante ball,” Taehyung remembers fondly, “when we were fifteen. I asked Jimin what your name was because I wanted to ask you to dance.”
“Shut up, no you didn’t,” you say with a scoff. 
“It’s true. You were standing there in that poofy white dress and I wanted to ask you to dance,” Taehyung points out. The fact that he even remembers what you were wearing is shocking. 
Who knew. Who knew, back then, that you would one day grow up to marry him. 
“And what did I say?” You demand more. 
Taehyung laughs at the memory. “I came up to you, and I asked you if you wanted to dance, and you said, and I quote, ‘Who are you?’”
“No,” you say, aghast at your own behavior. Were those really the first words you ever said to KIm Taehyung?
“You did. Don’t you remember?”
You think back. Think back to every year you have ever known Taehyung, every year you have spent scowling at him from across ballroom floors, making some snide remark as you pass by each other in the hallway. Every year you have spent cursing his existence, willing him away from you so he could bother someone else. Every year you have listened to rumor after rumor of girlfriend after girlfriend. You think back and somewhere, somewhere in there, in those dusty corners of your brain and cobwebbed boxes of your heart, is that first memory of Taehyung, too. 
Of him standing there in some generic black suit, black hair swept over his forehead, shoes too big. Of him coming up to you, trying to be as suave as a fifteen year old could be. Of you saying to him, instead of a hello, or even a what’s your name, “who are you?” 
Of him saying—
“And you said, ‘your dream come true’.” Like a dam bursting open, the memories flood back to you all at once. “I remember that.”
Taehyung laughs out loud at the thought of him saying something so cheesy. “Unsurprisingly, you didn’t want to dance with me.”
“You were so—” you begin, but you don’t have the words. Don’t have the words to express how you felt about him that night. Don’t have the words to express how you feel about him now. Thinking about this, talking about it, it is a bridge. A bridge between what was then and what is now. A bridge between who Taehyung was and who you were and who Taehyung is and who you are. “—so unthinkable. I couldn’t believe you had come up to me and said that. I couldn’t believe you had the audacity. But something about that night made me remember you. Made me remember your name.”
“You thought about me after that?” Taehyung asks. “Is that what you’re telling me?”
“There is something about you that is unforgettable,” you say, honest and real and true. What else can you tell him? The truth is that you have always thought about him. Whether you liked him or not. 
You finish your dinner and place your trays on the end tables next to you, stacking your empty bowls and plates on top of one another as the movie rumbles on in the background. 
“It is kind of a shitty movie,” Taehyung admits after a while of being wholly unenthused. 
“Yeah,” you agree. “But it’s good background noise.”
Taehyung laughs at your little mockery, warm and deep and from his belly. You look at him. He feels so far away, on the other side of the couch. Feels like he’s miles apart from you. You have spent countless nights clinging to his harm, hand gripped tight in his. And sitting like this, a full couch cushion of space between the two of you—it isn’t enough anymore. So you inch closer. 
And closer. 
And a little closer. 
Until you’re pressed up against his side, legs touching as they rest neatly in front of you, backs stick straight as you stare at the television. 
Taehyung holds his arm up. An open invitation. 
Without asking, you lean into him, resting your head in the crook of his shoulder, in the space right underneath his jaw. You pull your feet up onto the couch and curl into his frame, pressing yourself against him. He is warm and firm and inescapable. He smells of coffee and paint and Chinese spices. He wraps his arm around you and pulls you in, as if there were any other place you’d rather be. 
You sit like that for a while. Wrapped up in each other. Lazing around on the couch as the stars twinkle above your head. The movie ends and the two of you don’t even bother skipping the credits, letting them and the cheesy 80’s pop song play on, a distant soundtrack. 
“I never thought any of this would happen,” you breathe out. 
Taehyung looks down at you curiously. “What? This?”
“All of it,” you admit. “Us. Getting married. That stupid tabloid picture. My grandmother. This. It’s all so new.”
“New things will happen all the time,” Taehyung muses aloud. “We can’t help when things change.”
“You don’t have any regrets?” You have plenty. Regrets that you’ll never become the CEO you wanted to be in college. Regrets that you’ll never become the fashion designer you wanted to be as a little girl. Regrets that you will come to resent this marriage, resent Taehyung more than you have in years past, all because you had no choice. Regrets that your grandmother couldn’t see you now. Regrets that there were so many things in your life you could have changed, but didn’t.
“I thought I did,” Taehyung tells you. “I wanted to spend more time with my friends. I wanted to major in art in college. I didn’t want to marry you. I know you didn’t want to marry me.” He looks down and you look up at the same time, eyes locking, inches apart. “But looking back on it, I’m happy where I am. With what I have.”
“I never thought it could ever be like this,” you say, words falling off your tongue before you even ask them to.
“What?”
“Us.”
There’s no need to elaborate. Taehyung understands. He understands that, half a year ago, you both would have thrown yourselves into a volcano before holding hands with each other. He understands that getting over your hatred for each other seemed like an absolutely insurmountable task. He understands that you had never wanted to marry each other, that you couldn’t believe you would have to spend the rest of your lives with each other. 
And he understands that now, things are different. 
“I’m glad things happened the way they did,” Taehyung begins. “I’m grateful for us.”
You press yourself impossibly closer to him, feel his grip tighten around you. Like this, you can hear his heartbeat. Hear it thump like a drum, steady and firm and unwavering. His heart beats against his chest and you wonder. 
You wonder if he can hear the way yours beats for him, too.
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There were lots of things that made your night in together special. But one of them is the glaring fact that you don’t get them very often. That their infrequency makes them all the more valuable. 
This has become blatantly obvious to you, because right now you are not spending a night in together. Right now you are stuck at a gala that you have to attend for the sake of business, drinking thin flutes of champagne and mingling with people you barely speak to. 
The one good thing about nights like these is that Taehyung looks positively gorgeous in suits. He sort of always has, but you’d never admit that to his face. At least not until now. And as his wife, you are lucky enough to have a front-row seat. 
“I can feel you staring at me all the way from over here,” Taehyung deadpans as he helps himself to a chocolate-covered strawberry from the buffet table. 
You’re too obvious to have any shame about it. “What can I say, I like the view.”
“Hard to believe I was the once the one being shouted at for being inappropriate in public,” Taehyung says with a shake of his head. He bites into the strawberry and eats it all in a single go, tossing the stems into a bin nearby as you join back up in the heart of the crowd. 
“It’s only inappropriate if other people hear,” you tease, letting him guide you, hand intertwined with yours, towards an empty corner where the two of you can snuggle up to one another in (relative) peace. 
“I don’t think the champagne was very good for your filter, Miss Y/N,” Taehyung hisses into your ear, warm breath tickling your skin. 
“Don’t you mean Mrs. Kim?” You pose, an eyebrow raised. 
That seems to do something to Taehyung. It’s not very bright in here, with it being nighttime and all, but even still you can see the way his eyes darken. See the way his lips curl upwards, feel the way his grip on you tightens. It sparks something within you. Something deep in the pit of your belly. 
Something that makes you want more. 
You test the waters. “Mrs. Kim has a nice ring to it, don’t you think, Tae?”
Taehyung looks about a moment away from losing control. But instead of slamming you against the wall in front of all of these people and giving you what you really want, he growls out, low and powerful, “Home. Now.”
He doesn’t need to tell you twice. 
You hail your car outside of the venue and it’s all the both of you can do to not jump on each other right then and there, in the backseat of this giant black van, overcome with want, with need, with everything in between. Taehyung’s leg bounces impatiently the entire ride back, and the feeling of your hand pressed against his doesn’t seem to be calming him down. He pulls you close to him in the backseat of the car, a hand resting on your thigh. You eye him carefully, as if challenging him to be any more daring. He grins. 
Home cannot come soon enough. The two of you tumble out of the backseat and into the elevators, where you mash the top floor button after entering in the security access code, desperate and shameless. The ride seems to take hours, and the heat that surrounds you practically smothers you, covers you, fills up your lungs and chokes you. 
There is nothing left by the time you reach your door. The moment it slams shut behind you Taehyung presses you up against the back of it, pins you against the wood as he hovers over you, eyes tracing your lips. 
“Tell me something,” he demands. 
“What?” 
“A fact. Something I don’t know.”
It doesn’t take much thinking. “I want you,” you breathe out, watch it hit his skin, watch the way his eyes glint in the light of the entranceway. “Please, Tae. I want you.”
It’s enough for him. 
This is not the first time you and Taehyung have kissed. The first time was nearly five months ago, in a chapel, at an altar, surrounded by hundreds of people. It was so unfun that you seem to have eradicated the mere thought from your memory. But you remember that feeling from that day. That feeling you got when you pressed your lips against his, cemented your marriage with a kiss. That heat. That sting. 
Kissing him now—that feeling has returned tenfold. When his lips meet yours, it feels like fire is rushing through your veins, setting alight every nerve it passes, unforgiving and relentless. His enormous hands come up to cup your jaw, fingers pressing against the skin of your cheeks as they pull you close to him, keep you trapped in his hold. This is not the first time you and Taehyung have kissed but it feels like it is—it feels like there is a lotus blooming on a lilypad in your heart, it feels like you have been struck by lightning, it feels like nothing else you have ever felt before. It feels brand new. 
Pressing back against him, he slowly releases you from the cage he has created against the door, spinning around so the two of you can tumble up the stairs and into your bedroom, unable to resist sneaking in pecks here and there as you make your way upstairs. Every step you take you stop, giggle as he presses you against the railing just so he can steal another kiss from you, put his hands all over your body. It’s a wonder the two of you even make it into your bedroom at all. 
When you do, however, all bets are off. Taehyung presses you against the still-made bedsheets with a glint in his eye and a growl on his lips, pupils blown wide as he stares down at you, at your body.
"Aren't you a sight? Laid out so pretty for me," he purrs, robbing a breath from you.
It's a tone you have yet to hear from him. You find yourself growing impossibly hot under his stare, burning with an uncharted desire.
You can hardly wrap your brain around it. Here you are, craving the man you had spent the better half of your young adult life loathing. Maybe it’s the champagne; maybe it’s the way his fingers are running slowly up the length of your clothed torso. Whatever it is, your stomach does flips, unfamiliar to the way your body preens under his touch.
"Don't let it go to your head," you tease, simply because you could.
Taehyung hums disapprovingly, pressing kisses into your neck as he grabs one of your thighs and wraps it around his waist, riding your dress up in the process.
You sigh, exposing your neck further for him as he paints bruises into your neck. It feels like just yesterday you had called him out at the altar for his habit of sporting the very same marks you were soon to wear.
Perhaps you should have thought twice about letting the man you had married purely under business pretenses press his hips against your clothed center, but as he rolls his into yours, your mind falls blank, silencing any and all reservations you should have.
Whimpering, you beckon his mouth back onto yours, tongue meeting his wantonly. 
You feel his fingers creep up the outside of your bare thigh, thrilling you in the most primal way. Reaching the band of your underwear after what felt like entirely too long, he runs the pad of his thumb against the lacy fabric.
 You could scream. He is doing this on purpose. He must be. Surely he knows how badly you were aching for him? For him to fill you– whatever the manner may be.
You let out a whine before you can help yourself, frowning as Taehyung looks pleased with himself, confirming his knowledge of your prolonged pleasure.
"What's that? Did you say something?" he mocks, looking cruel and yet strikingly gorgeous as he smirks above you.
"God, you're irritating,” you huff, hips jerking up against his as he pulls at the band of your underwear, the elastic snapping back into the flesh of your hip. "Just fuck me already."
He tuts, clearly unimpressed by your impatience, "Now, where is the fun in that?"
Your eyes flutter shut as his fingers suddenly snake their way between your thighs. Mouth falling ajar, you grip his shoulders as he runs his middle finger against your clothed slit, trailing up and down your warmth. To think he was still dressed while he was touching you like this...
"No... I think I'll take my time with you," he says.
You mew against his hand, arousal forming against his long digits' ministrations. You have to hand it to him. Taehyung knows what he’s doing. The life of a bachelor has seemingly served him well.
You aren’t usually vocal in bed, but the way he’s purring words of filth to you, breath hot against the shell of your ear as he tells you how hot and slick your pretty pussy felt against his hand, has you gasping and sputtering, your own fingers wrapping around his wrist.
The fabric of your panties provides a friction that toys the line of pleasure and pain, making you thrust up to meet his motions, your humility slipping from you.
Taehyung watches you intently, cock growing hard under the constraints of his dress pants. You look better than he could've imagined, eyes watering and body shivering under his touch, his fingers soaking with your arousal. He can only imagine what you'd feel like with his fingers fully buried into you, rocking them against your velvety walls.
He lets out a groan of his own, turned on by the idea of you fucking yourself onto his fingers, whimpering out his name in ecstasy.
There’s this part of you that faintly recognizes that Taehyung has done this plenty of times before. Plenty of times with plenty of other lovers. But there is a different part of you, that part that bursts with light and hope, that reminds you that he was never married to those other ones. That his allegiance lies with you. And that thought, knowing that deep within you, he is yours, makes your jaw fall slack, pretty noises tumbling from your lips and your thighs clamping around him.
You were close, closer than you care to admit. Every touch against you is careful yet deliberate as he reads the signs of your body, the way it keens and arches into him, offering you words of encouragement as your climax finally hits.
"That's right. Good girl. Let go for me," Taehyung coos, eyes dark and focused on your writhing form.
You cry out into the familiar space of your shared room, head thrown back as you ride out the high, letting it wrack your body, send jolts throughout your veins.
You barely have time to catch your breath when he presses his mouth back onto yours, kiss still as eager as it was when you both first entered your home. You are alight with satisfaction as he pulls away to press a trail of kisses against your jaw.
"I want—f-fuck," you stutter as he finds your already hypersensitive clit once more, rolling his thumb over your now soaked panties in tantalizing circles, "want to make you feel good, too."
Admittedly, this fantasy had crossed your mind once or twice, brought on by the way he carried himself in a suit and the way his large fingers wrapped around the champagne glass; confident, collected, and entirely charming. Who are you to shy away from a man like him? He certainly has always been rather good-looking. 
He pauses his motions, pulling his hand back to sit on your waist. Your dress is of the finest, most delicate satin, and after tonight's activities, completely wrinkled. You can almost hear your stylist's cries of dismay. Whatever. You have a steamer. And why focus on the dress when it’s obvious the two of you are focused on what lies underneath it?
"Yeah?"
"Yeah." You nod, skin still burning from your past climax.
Helping you back up, Taehyung stands. You lick your lips as you sit back up on the edge of the bed, watching intently as he unbuckles his belt, audibly hissing as his pants fall to his ankles, cock visibly straining against the fabric of his underwear. Thank God you don’t have to stand. With the way your thighs still felt weak and how your husband looks like a goddamn Adonis towering above you? Your legs surely would give out underneath you if you rose.
Brows furrowed, Taehyung palms over himself briefly before pulling down the waistband of his underwear, his painfully hard member slapping against his torso.
Your eyes widened on instinct. While the last thing you wanted to do was help inflate Taehyung's already large ego, you were certainly impressed at his size; thick and girthy, his tip red and shining with precum.
He couldn't help but smirk, thoroughly pleased by the way you stared at him unabashedly, chest rising and falling heavily.
"Open up for me," he orders.
And who are you to deny a request from your dear husband?
Your pretty lips wrap themselves around his engorged tip, all remnants of lipstick long gone by now. Taehyung hisses, a hand finding the side of your jaw as you run your tongue against the underside of his cock.
"Fuck, you're so pretty," he grunts, fighting off the urge to grip the back of your head and fuck your throat. As much as he'd love your have you choking and drooling all over his cock – and boy would he – he lets you set your own pace, not wanting to overwhelm you.
It doesn't take long for you to sink your mouth further down, however, clearly set on making Taehyung feel as good as you could.
A low moan erupts from his throat, digits pressing into your jaw in request to take more of him in, which you happily oblige.
You had your eyes trained on him, completely obsessed with the way he panted through pink lips, hissing slightly every time your tongue rolled over his sensitive tip.
Lolling his head to a side, his eyes meet yours, gaze primal and wolfish as he watches the way you worked his cock.
"Doing so good, love. Doing so fucking good for me,” he murmurs.
You hum against his skin at the sound of the sudden pet name, an unfamiliar feeling fluttering in your belly. You push aside the feeling, focusing instead on the way he grunts at the new sensation you had just given him.
Giggling, you pull off his cock, opting instead to press a kiss against his leaking tip, making sure to hold his eyes as you run kitten licks against it.
"God, you're such a tease." He shakes his head in disbelief. 
He looks so good above you, shivering and cursing out praises on how good your mouth feels, how well you take his cock. Running your tongue along the length of his shaft, you become certain that this is a display you can’t imagine yourself ever getting tired of. But you have all the time in the world, right?
"Y/N,” he gasps suddenly, hips jerking towards your face. "Love, I'm gonna-- gonna cum."
"Cum in my mouth, please." Your voice was pleading and desperate. Taehyung had never heard such words spoken more sweetly. 
"Fuck's sake."
You let out a yelp in surprise as his fingers work their way through your hair, bringing your head back down onto his cock. You relax, though, when you feel the hot ropes of his cum hit the back of your throat, your hands finding purchase on his thighs as you do your best to swallow it all down.
Pulling yourself off him, you let out a small cough, eyes watering slightly as you hadn’t managed to prepare yourself with a breath before his release. His large palm runs across the top of your head as you caught your breath, expression flickering with something unfamiliar. Could it be... fondness? 
Your heart stammers at the thought as you stand, slowly stepping out of your dress, letting it drape off of your figure. Taehyung looks absolutely gobsmacked, pupils dark as he gazes at you, eyes unabashedly raking your body. He’s shameless. 
You both are. 
Slowly, you step towards him, fingers reaching out towards his shirt, carefully undoing the buttons as you gaze at each other, expressions unreadable. 
"Tae?” You ask innocently, blinking up at him. “Fuck me?" 
Your polite request makes Taehyung chuckle. 
"Please?" You bring your bottom lip between your teeth, eyes blinking up at him adoringly for good measure. You reach the last button, let his dress shirt drape open. He brushes it off himself, stands there for a few seconds just to let the way you’re ogling his toned chest go to his head. At least he’s good-looking. 
He sighs, probably contemplating some clever rebuttal, but eventually decides against it as his cock is already twitching back to life.
"Alright, love. Turn around. On your knees for me," He orders, making your stomach flip.
To your surprise, you are hardly in place when the warmth of his large hands finds the soft of your tummy, pressing you back into his chest as he pressed a peck to the back of your neck.
You squirm in his hold, whining as that same hand of his grabs hold of your breast, long digit rolling your nipple between their tips. You can’t help but press your ass back into him. His cock feels hot and heavy, pressing against the back of your thigh, making your pussy clench in anticipation. 
You want him.
You want him so bad that you don't know what to do with yourself, shuddering as his free hand runs along the side of your ass, leaving scorching hot trails on your skin wherever he kneads into your flesh. He's touching you everywhere – everywhere but where you need him the most, and the arousal that drips down your thigh mocks you.
"Dammit, please!" You exclaim, running out of patience.
"Please what?" He says, an eyebrow arched.
You shiver, committing the way his middle finger traced your pelvic bone to memory forever.
You puff out a frustrated breath, nearly at your wit's end. "Please fuck me, Tae."
Taehyung pauses, grip on your breast and hip tightening as he lets out a moan. You let one out yourself as you feel him readjust, cock pressing against your slick entrance.
"Fuck, you sound so pretty when you say my name," He grunts. "Okay, baby. I'll fuck you. Begging so nicely for my cock."
You let out a squeak as you're suddenly pushed down onto your hands, back arching as he pushes his fat cock inside your heavenly cunt. He's thick, so thick, that you instinctively grip the sheet underneath you, fingers curled around them tightly as if it means to hold onto your sanity.
Taehyung lets out a shaky breath, angling your hips up so that you could take more of him.
"You feel—feel so good," he admits above you, and suddenly you wish you could see him. See the way his bangs stick to his damp forehead—see the way his tongue swipes over his bottom lip wickedly.
You let that thought go, however, as he thrust into you, making your jaw fall slack and eyes flutter shut. Profanities roll off your tongue unabashedly, helpless under the way his thick member pulls out of you, only to slam back into you.
You weren't expecting this. The way he stretches you out further than anyone had before. Your pussy clenches around him, reveling in the sweet, sweet burn.
He digs into the flesh of your hips, holding you steady as you mew and cry out, pushing your hips back in time to his, trying your best to meet his movements.
"Tae... fuck, fuck, fuck—"
He was filling you to the brim. Filling you tight and deep.
God, the way he was panting behind you was music to your ears. His cock pulses every time you call out his name, voice muffled and buried as you had your head pressed into the mattress, hair messy and bouncing with every hard thrust.
"S'good! Fuck... so, ah, big..." you cry out.
You feel drunk. Intoxicated off this beautiful man and the way he makes you feel a way only he can.
You nearly let out a sob as the rough pads of Taehyung's fingertips suddenly reach around you and find your neglected clit, rolling light circles on the soft and swollen bundle of nerves skillfully.
You are a mess, whimpering and drooling into your expensive sheets, and he filled every inch of you, leaving no place undiscovered. Your high nears, stewing on low heat somewhere near the pit of your belly, waiting for a chance to erupt and wash all over you. Taehyung must be close to, you realize, as his thrusts began to slow down, slamming into you roughly as if chasing after his high.
"Gonna take this load? Huh? Gonna let me cum inside your pretty little pussy?" His voice is straining, as if trying to breathe evenly but merely moments from falling apart.
If only you could formulate an intelligent response, but instead, you are a blubbering wreck, thighs shaking as they threatened to give out underneath you. But somehow, Taehyung knew. He had you. Quicking his motions against your delicate pearl, he could tell you were close too, and he was going to make sure you got there.
Suddenly, you're crying out and convulsing, tears brimming at the ends of your eyes as you feel Taehyung empty into you, collapsing onto his hands as well.
You feel his hot breath against the back of your neck as he pants, breath growing more and more even as the two of you regain control of your bodies and minds.
Pulling out of you, he plops down beside you, and for a moment, the two of you hold each other's gazes, eyes speaking in ways words never could.
Finally, after what feels both like an eternity and just a moment, you work up the courage to say something, moving closer to him as you place a hand on his chest, cushioning your chin as you rested on top of it.  
"Psst," you beckon, voice hushed.
"Yeah?" His voice is husky and tired.
"I’m grateful, too."
"Huh?"
"I’m grateful for us, too."
Taehyung's gaze is soft, and it lingers on you for a second before the sides of his mouth curl up tenderly. He grins down at you, eyes drifting shut. You feel him squeeze you closer, pressing you against his skin. And then, you hear his breathing steady, see his lips part slightly. 
You lean into his chest, eyelids fluttering. “Thank you, Tae.”
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Not unlike the many other mornings you have awoken in this bed, when you open your eyes as the morning sunlight streams through the windows, Taehyung is nowhere to be found. The sheets on his side of the bed are flipped aside, revealing that soft outline of his body from the night before left imprinted into the sheets, a dip in the mattress where he slept. You had fallen asleep all wrapped up in each other, tangled up like vines, but must have separated sometime during the night. Distantly, you register Taehyung’s voice outside, notice his phone missing from his bedside table. He must be on an early morning call. 
You check your phone for the time. Ten o’clock. 
A late morning call, then. 
Still basking in the afterglow of the night prior, you slowly inch your way out of bed, shivering as you pull the covers off you and scoot your legs around so they hang over the edge of the bed. You rub at your eyes until you faintly remember you did not take your makeup off last night, and when your hand comes away covered with black streaks and flecks of mascara, you wince to yourself. There goes five hundred dollars worth of a skincare routine. 
After washing yourself up and applying as many serums as you can to your skin, you wrap yourself up in one of his button-up shirts, the torso so wide that it drapes over you. The tips of your fingers peek out from the ends of the sleeves, and you cross your arms lightly over your chest as you make your way to the door, ready to entice your husband back to bed for round two. What? It’s Saturday. 
You peer around the door to find Taehyung standing a few feet away, facing away from you. He’s shirtless, and as his wife you have absolutely no problems ogling him, the toned curves of his back, the muscles in his arms. He’s always been a looker. You just finally have an excuse to look for yourself. 
You approach him quietly, not wanting to interrupt nor broadcast your sex life to anybody on the other side who may be listening. Already, the idea of crawling back in bed together sends goosebumps along your skin, makes you giddy with anticipation. You’re just about to tap him on the shoulder, lips curled upwards in suggestion, when he says—
“And my inheritance? That’s secured now, right? Because I said I would pretend to be in love with her in public—?”
And it is as if Medusa herself appeared in this room, turning you to stone as your heart thuds to the floor, a hollow, empty noise. 
You don’t hear the rest of Taehyung’s conversation. You don’t even hear the sound of your own heartbeat. This terrible, aching sound rings in your ears, silencing everything in its wake, drowning out even the sighs of your own breath. It is as if you have been frozen solid. As if you have been shot in the stomach. You stand there, feeling absolutely nothing, and all you can do is brace yourself for what is to come. Taehyung’s words were the knife but his next actions will be its removal, leaving in its wake an irreparable wound. 
He turns around, casual and cool, voice still hushed. As if you were still asleep. As if you hadn’t heard anything at all. But when he twists his body and sees you standing there, staring back up at him, lips parted in shock. 
“I’ll call you back,” he tells whoever was on the other side of the line, looking more panicked by the second. He opens his mouth so he can explain himself, but you don’t need him to. You’ve heard everything already. 
“I should have known,” you say, feeling angry and betrayed and sad all at once. “I should have known it was all an act.”
“Y/N, wait, let me explain—”
“What is there to tell me, Taehyung? What are you going to say? That you didn’t mean it? That you thought I wouldn’t find out? That last night was just a one-off?” You demand. The heat from your veins hasn’t left. Still, it simmers through your blood, burning you up from the inside out. “That you didn’t want to lie to me?”
“It’s not like that and you know it,” Taehyung says defensively, brows furrowed. “Just give me a chance to explain myself.”
“Explain yourself? How you pretended, every day and every night, just so you could get some more money in your bank account? So you could make sure you would get your father’s business when he died?”
Taehyung bites back easily. “Don’t act like you weren’t also faking it at some point. I know you were almost removed from your grandmother’s will.”
Your tongue is bitter at the mention of your grandmother. As if Taehyung ever even knew her. “My grandmother has nothing to do with this.”
“Really?” Taehyung challenges. “So you wanting to stay in her will was just a little bonus, right?”
“Don’t,” you say sharply. “It’s different.”
“Different how?” Taehyung spits. “Because right now, to me, it looks pretty similar to what I’ve done.”
“My grandmother died months ago,” you remind him. Her will is no longer the question. It has been written, settled, and executed. There was no reason for you to continue playing along once she took her last breath. No reason—unless you wanted to. “Meanwhile you’ve been keeping your inheritance a secret from me this entire time.”
“We made a deal,” Taehyung says. “A deal that said we would both act happy and pretend to be in love because we both had things we needed to worry about. Family things. Money things. You were a part of this, just like I was. You pretended, too.”
“Well, maybe I stopped pretending!” 
You can’t take it anymore. All this anger, all this emptiness, it’s been bubbling up inside you ever since you heard those first words come out of his mouth. It spills out of you all at once, an eruption from your lips, your heart’s doors bursting open. You have held his hand tightly in your own. You have pressed your lips to his. You have laid yourself bare in front of him. What is there left to protect? What part of you has not already been stained by him, by his touch, by the feeling of his fingers against your skin?
The hallway is silent, but you can hear your cry echo down the corridor. Hear the way it bounces along the walls before fading away. 
“Maybe I stopped pretending,” you repeat, softer this time. You blink and already can feel the streaks along your skin, the tears falling from your eyes. “Did you ever think about that?”
“Y/N, what are you talking about?” Taehyung looks like he’s in disbelief. Like he cannot believe the words you are saying to him. 
Well, that makes two of you. 
“Can’t you see, Tae? Can’t you tell?” You ask, the nickname falling from your lips before you can even help it. You must remind yourself to change that, later. “I’m in love with you.”
They are words you have never said to someone before. Not even your old boyfriends. Words that you always knew you would reserve for someone special. Someone who would touch your heart and make it their own, someone who would leave imprints of their fingers against your chest. Someone who would brighten you up from the inside out, leave you bursting with light. 
Ironic, that Taehyung has become that someone. When he is the one person you never thought could. 
When he has proven, time and time again, that you two just cannot mix. Oil and water. Pastel and acrylic. Satin and silk. 
“You don’t have to say anything,” you spit out quickly, before Taehyung has a chance to respond. “I know it doesn’t matter to you.”
“Y/N, yes it does,” Taehyung begins, desperate and pleading. “I know you heard what I said, but I swear, it stopped being an act for me, too. Things are different now, just like you said.”
“Don’t. Please.” You pull away as he reaches out towards you. Faintly, you remember that it is his shirt you are wearing. Remember that no matter what you do, he will always surround you. “Please, Tae.” You have nothing left. You can’t bear to look at him, but where else will you go? You cannot believe the things he’s said, the things he’s done, but where else would you go?
“I love you, too,” Taehyung says, and a part of you wants so badly to believe him. 
A part of you wants so badly to ingrain those words into your head, carve them into your heart, let him wrap his arms around you and promise that everything will be alright. But things are different now. Just like you said. You and Taehyung are not the same people you were six months ago. Or six weeks ago. Or even six minutes ago. You are helpless and he has proven that he does not care. 
“I have to go,” you say, looking away. You don’t think you could handle turning back to him again. “Please, Tae.”
“I’m sorry,” Taehyung says, and he reaches out once more but you are not there to meet him halfway. Were you ever?
“I know,” you whisper back.
You duck into your bedroom and pack a suitcase of everything you need. Being here is suffocating. Being with him is like setting yourself alight. 
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Victoria has no questions when you show up at her door later that day, suitcase by your side and this ridiculous bottle of Merlot in your hands. You had picked it up on the way over. You sort of figured you might need it. 
“You don’t wanna talk about it, do you?” Victoria asks. 
“Tell me about your streaming service,” you hiccup in response.
Victoria is happy to oblige. She even tells you that she still hasn’t picked a CFO, and that the position would be open for you if you ever wished to take it. 
Funnily enough, what will become of you once your father retires and passes along the company is the furthest away from your thoughts. 
You remember being so worried about that. Being so worried that, once they married you off like every good daughter should be, you would be absorbed into your husband’s life, cut out of your family’s. Your father would choose a cousin, an uncle, or even a friend to take after the business, bestowing upon you a thoughtful inheritance but nothing more than that. All of those years of schooling, finance in college, your MBA soon after, would be wasted, just so you could hang on the arm of your husband for the rest of your life. 
It’s thoughtful of Victoria to think of you for the position. She knows just as well as anyone else that you would be an excellent fit. And if things were just a little bit different, you would be jumping at the offer. 
But your future career plans are on the backburner, along with the rest of your life. 
All you can really do, right now, at this very moment, is wait for things to change. As they always do. 
“Don’t you have an event tonight?” Victoria asks about three days into your stay. She’s given you her favorite (her words, not yours) guest bedroom and an enormous closet to match, despite you only coming over with a carry-on’s worth of clothes. 
You scoff to yourself. “Like I’d want to go to anything with him.”
“Have you even called your parents?” 
“No,” you say, not even caring about the repercussions. There’s no doubt in your mind that they’ll be ringing you soon. And when they do, maybe then you’ll finally work up the courage to tell them what really happened. Tell them that you can’t go back there. Not yet, at least. 
“I’m sorry that this happened to you,” Victoria says as she hands you a bowl of vegetable soup, homemade from a couple of days ago. You nod to yourself, sniffling as you curl into the couch cushions and wish they would absorb you whole. 
There’s no need to ask her what she means by ‘this’. Everything. From your engagement to the marriage, from those tabloids to the deal, from your grandmother’s death to now. It has all been unfair. Life is unfair. And while you’ve always known that, it has been particularly cruel to you as of late. 
Still, when you wake up sometimes, you can still feel him tracing over your skin. Feel his lips hovering over yours, breath fanning out over your cheeks. You turn over and expect to see him lying there, on the right side of the bed, sheets mussed as they cover his figure. You wake up and for a brief moment, for that split, split second, there is peace. And happiness. And love. 
And then there is nothing. 
“Yeah,” you sigh. “Me, too.”
Maybe he really does love you. Maybe things really did change. But you have always been a pragmatic person, always let your head guide you rather than your heart. The secret’s out. Taehyung had an inheritance he needed to secure. You were his path to doing so. Those things haven’t changed. No matter if his feelings did. 
“Hey, look at this,” Victoria says, brows furrowed as she holds out her phone in front of you, revealing a livestreamed interview from the event tonight. 
You peer over. 
It’s Taehyung. 
Of course it’s Taehyung. Who else would she be showing you?
He stands in a clean-cut gray coat, draping over his figure, black dress shirt and slacks underneath, belt wrapped neatly around his hips. He holds his hand up in a wave and smiles politely to the cameras, to the reporters, letting the flashes wash over him like waves in the ocean. 
“Mr. Kim! Mr. Kim!” Someone calls. “Where’s your wife?”
Oh, God.
Taehyung grimaces a little, pursing his lips. “My wife won’t be joining me tonight.”
“Can you tell us why?” They shout. 
“Sorry, no more questions. Thank you for asking though. She’s well,” he says, quickly ushering himself along, entering the venue so no more reporters can bombard him. When he disappears, the livestream immediately moves on to the next guest, but you hardly pay them any attention. 
“Huh,” Victoria says aloud. 
Indeed. Taehyung’s response strikes you as rather odd. Why would he tell the public that? Why not make up a lie, say you’re sick, or you’re overseas, or you’re just late? Why simply tell them that you won’t be there? Surely, Taehyung is just as aware of the consequences of arriving at an event without you as you are. There’s no doubt that his parents will be in contact with him soon, too. No doubt that this will leave a stain on his family. His image. It might even threaten his inheritance after all.
So why not lie?
You frown to yourself, nose scrunching up in confusion. You don’t like where this train of thought leads.
“You okay?” Victoria asks when she sees the bewildered expression on your face.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” you say. Just completely befuddled. It escapes you, why Taehyung wouldn’t just make up some sort of excuse as to reasoning behind your absence. Why he would even show up at the event at all. Certainly, going to the event without you is worse than not going at all. It prompts questions. It spreads rumors. 
Later that night, you get a call from your parents, demanding to know why you weren’t there with him. You say you got sick. You plead with them not to question anything. 
You wonder what happens next. You and Taehyung still have two more events this week. A dinner and a ball. What will you do then?
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Taehyung goes solo for the dinner. You suppose you could have predicted that, considering his apparent willingness to arrive alone for the first event, too. He hasn’t made any efforts to contact you and for once, you’re glad for his silence. Not that you even know what he would say to you, anyway, but at least he isn’t begging you to come back to him. 
The sad truth is that if he did, if he got down on his knees right in front of you and willed you to come back home, you probably would. He has always been impossible to resist. Even when you first met him, when he sauntered up towards you and told you he was your dream come true. You didn’t know it then. But he was. He was everything you would ever want. 
Why would he lie? 
Why would he do that?
You can’t wrap your head around it. What is he getting out of it by telling the truth? By admitting to the paparazzi, to the reporters and the cameramen, that you won’t be there with him. That you will not be joining him. Nothing, certainly. His parents must be furious. His inheritance may be on the rocks. His image might tank. 
So then, why do it at all?
Could it… could it be?
Is it true?
You have loved Taehyung for a long time. Longer than you probably even care to admit. You have always held your head high at events, spoken loudly and without fear, but being with him made you feel safe. Secure. You would hold his hand and know, know that he was holding yours, too. It grounded you. It soothed your worries. 
Does he really love you back?
Taehyung smiles politely and laughs when he needs to at these events, but he doesn’t look the same. Even through the screen you can see those bags under his eyes, that spark that has faded. You hardly recognize him. He looks so lonely, without someone by his side. So distant. 
When you know the dinner has ended, you almost pick up the phone and call him. 
Almost. 
Instead, when the ball rolls around, you ask Victoria if she’s got a spare dress she can lend you.
 Kim Taehyung, for someone you have seen covered in paint splotches, wearing old college hoodies, and fresh out of a restless night’s sleep, cleans up pretty well. For a married man, at least. 
You wonder what the past few days must have been like for him. If they have been as empty as your own. Wonder what it was like, riding alone in a big black van to this hotel ballroom, no one to tease, no one to laugh with, no one to hold. No one to poke him awake if he accidentally fell asleep. No one to make sure he’s okay. 
Taehyung stands right outside of the entrance, waving politely to all of the paparazzi, smiling as the cameras flash, giving them the time of day for a moment before he heads inside and muscles his way through another event without you. 
Or so he thinks. 
You spot him just as he opens his mouth, ready to repeat those same lines all over again.
My wife won’t be joining me tonight. She’s well, though.
And maybe it’s just because you haven’t seen him in nearly a week. Maybe it’s just because he is about to lie to those reporters once more, ready to face whatever consequences come his way. 
Or maybe it’s just because you miss him. Miss him terribly, have been missing him terribly. Being away from him was necessary, but that didn’t make it any less unbearable. Not getting to hold his hand, see his smile, meet his eyes. You and Taehyung may not have always liked each other, but you saw him every day regardless. He became a constant in your life. Not an if, but a when. If everything went to shit, you always knew he would still be there. 
And there he is. 
“Wait! Taehyung!”
Taehyung’s eyes widen as he hears your voice, gaze darting around wildly, mouth parted in surprise. He looks around desperately, scanning the crowd, meeting the eyes of every single person in front of him until he finally looks to the left, sees you rushing up towards him, hiking up the skirt of your dress as your heels tap against the sidewalk. 
And when he spots you, sees you running up to him, his body relaxes, a weight lifted from his shoulders as he beams back at you, relieved and thankful and filled with joy, all at once. And you know, then. 
You know that everything will be okay. 
“Sorry I’m late,” you say sheepishly, cheeks burning as he looks at you, takes in every inch of you, breathes you in and lets you fill him up. 
Taehyung doesn’t respond. You reach out to hold his hand but he grabs your wrist and pulls you in, presses you against his body as he presses his hands against your cheeks, palms burning as they meet your skin, and he kisses you. In front of all these people, he kisses you. 
And goddamnit, you will kiss him back. 
It feels like lightning, like a thunderstorm, like the waves of the ocean are crashing against your heart. It feels like fire, like flames are licking at your veins, sending sparks through your blood. It feels like home. 
You and Taehyung ignore the shouts of reporters, the flashes of cameras, the honks of the cars on the other side of the road. When you part, he presses his forehead against yours and lets the tip of your nose meet his. And you smile. 
“Don’t be alone any longer, Mr. Kim,” you whisper, loud enough so only he can hear. 
“When I’m with you, I never am, Mrs. Kim,” he murmurs back. 
You wonder what those tabloids will be saying about you tomorrow. 
The rest of the night finds the two of you pretty much inseparable. You wrap yourself around his arm and for the first time in a long time, he presses his hand against the small of your back, keeping you close. Like he’d ever lose you again. 
One of your least favorite parts about attending balls used to be the dancing. As a young and eligible bachelorette, you would always have to lock hands with another, let him awkwardly guide you along to the music as you made the worst small talk imaginable, forcing laughter and smiles whenever he said something he thought was particularly funny. 
But, like so many others, things have changed. Things are different now. 
The waltz comes on and you and Taehyung are the first to reach the center of the ballroom floor, letting him rest his hand on your waist as you press yours on top of his shoulder. Let him twirl you around the room as the orchestra plays in the background, a soft, sweet, light little melody that carries you along. 
“I missed this,” you say softly. 
“I missed us,” Taehyung corrects. He pauses for a moment, swallowing hard. “I’m sorry for not telling you about my inheritance.”
“I’m sorry for storming out. I should have listened to you.” you respond easily. You both have plenty to apologize for. But night is darkest right before dawn. 
“I should have said something,” Taehyung says with a shake of his head. “But I was just so—so worried that something would go wrong. And I didn’t know how to explain how I felt about you. I acted in the beginning, too, but then things changed.”
“They always do,” you muse with a grin. 
“I couldn’t believe I had you,” Taehyung admits. “I mean, look at you. You’re gorgeous. And funny. And true.”
“Go on,” you tease, even though you do nothing to hide the smile inching its way across your face, the heating of your cheeks, the simmering of your skin. 
“Oh, shut up. You know what I mean.” Taehyung rolls his eyes. “I just—I felt something for you I couldn’t explain. I still can’t.”
You don’t have to prod any further. You know. Deep within your heart, you know. There is love blossoming in his to match the garden that has bloomed in your own. The flowers that have sprouted in the ashes. He has them, too. And when those petals open and the light streams in, he will know. He will know, too. 
“You make me crazy,” you tell him, whispering gently into his skin. “But I’m a better person when I’m with you. I know I am.”
“I meant what I said, that night,” Taehyung says. Makes you wonder which night he’s actually talking about. “That I’m happy that things have changed. That things happened the way they did. I’m grateful for us.”
“I am, too,” you say. And you are. 
You rest your head against his chest as you dance together, swaying back and forth to the beat of the drums, to the strums of the violins, all wrapped up together like ivy, like vines. Those, too, sit in that garden of yours. Keep you tethered to his side, keep him close to yours. He holds you in his arms and he smiles, because he knows, too. Knows that that garden in your heart will soon have a matching one in his. A mirror image of who you are. Who you’ve become. 
Things change. They always will. But so long as he is by your side, and so long as you are by his, you know. Everything will be okay. 
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It's different, this time, when Taehyung presses you into the mattress. 
There is no rush. Because now you know for certain that all the time in the world is yours. He is yours forever. You are his.
The two of you are a mixture of tangled limbs and shared breaths, the feverish, irrepressible need to give yourself to each other nearly tangible. He breaks the kiss suddenly, and you’re about to break out in protest. That is, until you see him unbuttoning his shirt.
Inspired, you wiggle out of your own clothes, eyes locked on Taehyung's soft torso and the idea that you had married such a beautiful man, inside and out.
Looking back, you wonder if that was always inevitable. If you and Taehyung falling into each other had been written in the stars from day one, sealed as your fate from the moment he came up to you at that ball when you were teenagers. He was going to be a part of your life no matter what. Whether or not you ended up marrying him. But having him like this?
It makes it all worth it.
"Do you like what you see?" That old cocky smirk of his makes an appearance.
You raise a brow, choosing to omit a response as you unclasp your bra, letting it fall from your chest.
Taehyung swallows.
"Do you?" You tease.
His response comes in the form of bites down your necks and licks down your chest, stealing your breath from you. 
Your clothes are somewhere dispelled beside your passionate bodies, growing cold beside the way your two hot bodies warmed one another.
"You are so beautiful," Taehyung praises, fingers coming up to cup your breast, bringing it up to his mouth.
You mewl, wrapping an arm around his shoulders as his tongue toys with your pert bud, teeth grazing it ever so often just to hear the broken gasp that'd always follow. 
"And so sensitive too," he giggles, making you pout. His hands are gentle as if every touch means something. As if you mean something—no, everything—to him. And the most wonderful part is that he means everything to you, too. 
"Shut up." You roll your eyes playfully, gasping as his palm comes down the side of your thigh suddenly in warning. You bite down your swollen bottom lip at the gush of arousal that dampened your underwear in response.
"Watch your tone, love. Of both our positions, you are in the most compromising one." He reminds you. It isn't a threat, and while usually, that kind of tone would thrill you, you couldn't help but want his mouth back on yours already.
"You talk too much." You flop back onto the bed with a sigh. Taehyung watches with interest as your pretty tits bounce in consequence. Extending your hands out towards him, you give him a pouty look. "Just wanna kiss you."
"Is that all I am to you? Just a pair of lips for you to mack on? I've got news for you, sweetheart, there's a brain behind these ravishing good looks." He scoffs in feigned offense, sitting back on his heels.
You giggle.
It seems as though even during the most intimate of moments, Taehyung still found a way to be, well, Taehyung. At least that hasn’t changed. 
"Whatever, pretty boy. Why don't you come over here and put that mouth of yours to good use?" You purr, making his eyebrows raise in surprise.
"Oh? I don't remember you being this assertive when I was pounding you into the mattress last time."
“What, I can’t have a little fun as well?” You tease, grinning as you look up at him, raking your eyes over his figure. 
"Wanna have fun, love?," He murmurs into your ears, hands gripping either of your plush thighs. "Then spread those pretty legs for me, and I'll show you exactly how much fun you can have."
God, you love this man.
You oblige eagerly, breath quickening as he helped you press your knees by your chest, leaving the wet patch in your underwear on full display. 
"My pretty little wife." He sighs dreamily, making heat rush to your core.
Taehyung's cock stood loud and proud, a hot reminder of where the night would eventually lead to. Seriously, how did you get so lucky? You must've been a saint in a previous life, you decide right then. Or at least, the stars have chosen to be rather kind to you in this one.
"Gonna take these off," he mutters, mostly to himself, tugging the ruined fabric over your ass and down your legs, with your help, of course.
Despite your usual display of confidence, lying beneath your husband, spread out like this, has you feeling vulnerable and slightly insecure. But that insecurity vanishes, however, as he lets out a soft moan, fingers moving to spread your glossed lips apart.
"So fucking pretty, baby. Gonna make you feel so fucking good," he groans, leaning down to press his face near your most intimate part.
Pressing a tentatively lick against, his eyes flicker up to yourself, curious to see if you’re okay with him proceeding. And, well, it’s not like you’re going to say no, are you?
Embarrassingly, you rut against him, making him laugh as you drown in your own mortification.
"Need it that bad, huh?" He coos.
"Yes, please."
The rest of your plea is lost in a moan as Taehyung finds your clit, wrapping his pink lips around the sensitive muscle and giving it a generous suck. Your hands are in his hair before you can think to stop yourself, tugging at his scalp deliciously as his mouth makes its way with you.
Thank goodness for this apartment belonging to just the two of you as the noises that tumbled from your lips surely would've left a roommate blushing.
You're panting, begging for more even though you aren't sure how you'd even handle more. It comes as a delight and slight surprise as fingers suddenly slip inside, wasting no time to rub against your velvety smooth walls, curling themselves inside you.
"Fuck, Tae!" you cry out, eyes squeezing shut.
It was pure reflex. Up until now, you had been watching Taehyung intently, completely consumed by the way his mouth moves against you. How his tongue flicks against your needy clit cruelly. It just felt too fucking good.
You're so wet, positively dripping down his chin as he runs his hot muscle up and down the length of your pussy, devouring you like he hadn't eaten in months, and you were his first meal.
Taehyung’s nothing short of addicting, completely and utterly intoxicating, and you slip further and further to your demise with every lick he takes, every press of his tongue against your clit.
He has a hand pressed against the lower half of your torso, feeling the way you jerk and squirm as he makes a mess of you. You’re close and you know it, too, if not by the way you’re calling his name over and over again, then by the way your thighs tremble, hardly even strong enough to stay up.
"Let go for me, love. I've got you." He sounds so sweet, so angelic, despite how filthy what he was doing to you was.
His words are the push you need, and, like a rubber band that has been stretched past its limit, you finally snap, back arching off the bed as you come with a cry. White fills your vision, and your mind goes blank, only sounds of blissful static filling your ears.
His fingers hold up your quivering legs, mouth pressing kisses onto your pussy encouragingly until you simply can't bear it any longer, pushing his mouth away as you stutter out words of sensitivity and overstimulation.
“I’m going to have to request more of that throughout this marriage.” You manage to say once your vision and breath come back to you.
Grabbing one of your hands, Taehyung brings it to his mouth.
“All you need do is ask,” he replies, making you laugh as he presses a kiss to the back of your hand, always a gentleman
Not long after, you find yourself pressed against Taehyung, tongue running against his as he presses his hips into yours. He isn’t coy about his want for you, rolling his cock against your already sensitive center. Warm precum leaks onto your lower abdomen, and suddenly, all you can think about is having him inside you again.
“Taehyung?”
You don’t even need to ask. Hitching your leg around his thigh, he knows exactly what you’re seeking, lining up his leaking cock with your swollen entrance.
Pressing into you, he buries himself to the hilt, groaning out as your warmth envelopes him. You moan out so prettily for him, feeling tight and full with your first orgasm only minutes ago.
“You okay?” he hums, kissing your cheek.
You nod, ears warm at the intimacy of the moment. In many ways, this is nothing like your first time together. You are face to face, eye to eye, heart to heart. Between your bodies could be found more than just desire, but commitment. Devotion. Love. 
“I love you, Tae.” You gush, sighing out as he begins to rock into you.
He falters slightly at your confession but recovers quickly, intertwining his hand with yours and pressing it by your head.
Faintly, you realize. 
That was the first time you had ever told him that.
You look up at him, expecting some wide eyes or even a bit of a nervous tilt to his lips, but all you are met with is a glow. He beams down at you, and your heart swells. 
“I love you, too, Y/N,” he whispers, but you hear the words in your ears loud and clear.
Soft noises fill the room as the two of you become one—hearts synchronizing with one another in silent promise.
It was a promise unlike the one you had made to each other that day at the altar, for this one was real. This one was true.
You shutter with every thrust of his hips, your abused clit finding itself in the crossfire of Taehyung’s passionate motions.
Whimpering, you cling to him, overwhelmed and emotional, like your heart was about to burst. Taehyung lights a fire in you, sends lightning straight through your core. Every word, every smile, every kiss, every touch, they send shivers down your spine, tingles throughout your skin. It’s like you’re falling in love with him all over whenever you see him, whenever his deep brown eyes meet your own.
You remember being so afraid of love that you broke up with all your old boyfriends because of it. Because you couldn’t commit, because you were worried about your career, because they just didn’t give you that spark. But lying here pressed against him, against your husband, you aren’t afraid. Wrapped up around him, tangled up in him, you know. 
Between messy kisses and words of adoration, you find yourself growing closer and closer to your release. Brows furrowed and neck flushed, you come with a soft whimper of his name, coaxing his own orgasm out of him. He lets go inside you, painting you with his seed in a way that pleases you to no end.
Hand still in yours, he gives it a squeeze, pressing a kiss onto your damp chest, right over where your heart beats for him.
“I love you,” Taehyung says again when you meet his eyes, firmer this time, louder. Like he’s worried you didn’t believe him the first time. 
“I know,” you say with a giggle, the words going straight to your head—and your heart. 
Taehyung scowls. “What, no ‘I love you’ back? Is that what I’m hearing?”
“Well, only because you want one so badly,” you tease, pressing a quick kiss to his round button nose. “I love you, too, Tae. Always will.”
“I think I knew, then,” Taehyung says with a fond sigh, nostalgia overcoming his expression. “That first time we met. I knew you would be mine, one day.”
“You got lucky,” you scoff slightly. “But I’m glad things happened the way they did.”
“You’re my dream come true, Y/N,” he says. 
“And you are mine,” you murmur.
As the two of you drift off, all twisted up in each other, so mixed up you can’t figure out where you end and he begins, you think back to that night. That ball. 
“Who are you?” You ask, nose scrunched up in distaste. Before you stood a boy you had never met before, wearing shoes that were too big for him and a suit that was a touch too small. 
He grins at you, running a hand through his perfectly-styled hair fringe swiped neatly over his forehead, and he says, “your dream come true.”
And so it was. 
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don’t forget to message me! ~ and don’t forget to message rose!
7K notes · View notes
taegularities · 2 months ago
Text
changes in between | jjk (m)
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Summary: “Does that mean that I can kiss you now?”
Becoming the roommate of Jeon Jungkook is the biggest change you’ve ever gotten thrown into - but little do you know that the addition of another man will bring even further turbulence into your (love) life.
pairing: Jungkook x reader (+ some Taehyung x reader)
rating: 18+
genre: roommate au, s2f2l; some crack, fluff, angst, smut
warnings: pining, swearing, mentions of alcohol consumption, fear of the dark; explicit sexual content: multiple smutty scenes (one’s milder and with tae), slight exhibitionism lol you’ll see, soft dom!jk, big dick!jk, fingering, oral (f. & m receiving), handjob on the side, breast play, jungkook sucks some tiddies, some masturbation, dirty talk, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), voice kink lol, some finger sucking, praising, biting, soft manhandling, soft sex and rough sex, cockwarming at the end?, some aftercare; jealous jk :( ... jealous tae :(, jk calls oc a flower <3
word count: 24.7k (sorry, please do still read lmao)
a/n: hi, there !! all hail @taemaknae​​​​ who hit me up with this ingenious idea some time ago and had me intrigued right away. consider this a belated birthday gift, baby, i really hope you like it and i’m SUPER NERVOUS ABOUT IT LMAO :’) this trope is smth entirely new to me and i’m shaking in my boots here - so please let me know what you guys think !! enjoy the freaking awesome (!!!) banner nicole made, pls the talent T_T
betas: @voiceswithoutlips​​​​ @missgeniality​​​​ & @hobiandsprite​​​​, thank you for your suggestions, endless help and for always letting me yell and whine in the dms :’) i love you guys to bits x
uploaded to AO3, too (for those who prefer pdfs or mobile readings!)
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➳ listen to the CIB playlist for the full experience!
MASTERLIST | WIPs
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His eyes keep closing.
You know sleep is washing over him slowly, but all you can do is watch him intently - because even after numerous pleas and annoyed shakes of your head, he is still standing here, back leaning against the wall and wobbly legs carrying him god knows how.
You know that you would’ve definitely given in to the tiredness and weakness by now, understanding exactly that you become a victim to gravity anytime you drink too much. And from what you can tell, he is entirely wasted.
“Jungkook, honestly…”
His head shoots up at your words and he looks at you through half lidded eyes, the exhaustion written in them so clearly that you wonder what is giving him the power to still stay this stubborn. Instead of answering, he smirks as he looks past you, rolling his eyes and burying a hand in the pocket of his jeans.
“Y/N, honestly,” he imitates, the mocking in his quiet voice so apparent that your gaze darkens, “You’re just too scared to talk. You always are.”
“I’m not going to talk to you like this.”
Jungkook scoffs, back arching from the wall as he approaches your figure near the couch. With two idle steps, he closes in, fingers slowly coming up to your chin to meet your frustrated stare.
It’s not the first time he’s touching you like this. After weeks and months, you’ve gotten used to his affection, his presence close to one of a best friend - a soulmate even - and comforting to a pleasant extent. But at this moment, his hand on your face feels suffocating.
Not in a bad way. But more in a can-you-hear-my-heart-beating-for-you way.
If you think about your situation carefully, you might be able to pinpoint when you started feeling this way. Maybe it was before Taehyung - or maybe it just began a few minutes ago. Either way, you hate that you’ve let it come this far, and the way his gentle, sparkling eyes smile at you doesn’t help your ability to keep yourself controlled much.
“Tell me I have no effect on you.”
His voice is covered in honey as he gauges your reaction. The thumb stroking your jaw is cause enough for you to exhibit the effect he is talking about - the goosebumps on your arms and the unintentionally escaped gasp are surely enough for him to interpret your heart for what it feels.
This effect has been prominent for quite some while now.
But maybe it’s smartest to rewind to the beginning of your story.
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Everytime you get nervous, your fingers start fiddling with whatever they can grasp the fastest.
Although your right palm is already holding onto your phone for dear life, your left one is clutching your sweater, the fabric a little too warm for spring. The suffocating feeling brings a tight knot into your throat, one that you try hard to swallow as you finally press the dial button on your phone.
The beeps ring endlessly, and you’re close to hanging up again before a friendly female voice answers. “Hi! Jeon speaking, how can I help you?”
Your grip around the blue fabric tightens and you bite your lip for a second before you say, “Uh, hello. Good day. My name’s Y/N Y/L/N and I’m calling because of the online ad of the apartment you put up for rent?”
“Yes!” she chimes immediately, and you hear shuffling in the background and something moving that faintly seems to resemble the uncomfortable squeaking of a chair. Her enthusiasm puts you at ease - at least she’s not grumpy like the past few people you have called; her tone seems promising and instills hope that you might finally end your eternal search for an ideal place to live.
Since you received the bill for your last flat, your nerves were on edge at all times, the fear of being thrown out and landing on the cold, unforgiving streets ever lingering. The woman you’re speaking to now has a promising alternative though - a perfect place for young adults and those who are in desperate need of a cheap, yet livable apartment.
“I was expecting your call! Thank you for your email and time. So uh - jumping right into it! Two bedrooms, a counter that separates the living room and kitchen with the latter being big enough for two people to work in, a tub and washing machine in the bathroom. I know it’s hard to find something that fits all your needs, but I’m positive this might satisfy you.”
She babbles on some more, tells you about promising aspects of the apartment - and you listen, noting down the pros and contras mentally before you finally chuckle and remark, “Yeah, you see, my current flat has broken windows and a barely functioning air conditioner. It’s expensive and fails in so many areas. At this point, I’m happy with anything that just secures a healthy life.”
“Perfect!” she exclaims, her happiness never faltering while even more paper shuffles in the background. In your head, you imagine her fumbling with pictures of the apartment, trying to remind herself of its features while she advertises the place to you further. “Luckily, there’s already a fully working air conditioner and you won’t have to suffer this upcoming summer.”
This deal sounds good enough to you - until now, she hasn’t named a single factor that might shatter your hopes, and the way she’s talking about the apartment nearly sounds like a passion, a promise she could give without disappointing you. So maybe-
“However, there’s something you might be interested in knowing,” she finally tells you, and your heart stills for a split second as your lips part, your mind dropping dozens of possible scenarios on you that might make you reconsider your decision after all.
“Yes?” Your voice nearly trembles and your eyes shake, your heart thumping in your throat as you imagine another failed phone call and anxious thoughts filling your brain.
She doesn’t help with her dramatic pause, sighing slowly before she finds her gentle voice again and explains, “It’s a shared apartment. You’d have a roommate. But before you decline-”
You are very close to declining. You’re one to live alone - a lone soul wandering through the world and then coming home to a silent room, no noise save for your humming and lo-fi music. But then again, this apartment seems perfect - it’s not only close to your college and job at the mall but offers the opportunity of sharing rent, too. If you thought living there was cheap already, then you’d thrive and swim in money if there was a second person to help you out.
“-he works, too! He just finished his studies and is currently a part-timer at a grocery store before starting his actual desired profession. You wouldn’t have to ever fear being alone - he’s reliable and a good person. I’m sure you’d get along well!”
He.
A sigh leaves your lips as you squint, head tilting while your eyes focus on the sink that is neatly placed in the bathroom of your working place. You wet your lips as you consider your options; but you soon realise that there are no counter-arguments other than your selfish demand to stay alone that would sound logical enough for you to say no.
“What’s his name?”
“He’s my son!” she answers, the insecurity in her voice vanishing as she gathers her convincing tone again, “His name is Jeon Jungkook.”
Jeon Jungkook.
A pleasant name. You wonder whether living with him would be just that, too.
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Apparently, Jeon Jungkook hasn’t returned from his vacation with a friend when you arrive at the apartment, the inside of it still fairly undecorated and dull as you inspect every room. Although you already took a look at the flat’s inner life a few days ago, you’re again struck by the smell of fresh paint, euphoria growing inside you as you realise that you have ten whole days to think about the interior design you want your room to bloom in.
It’s a pity that you don’t know about Jungkook’s taste - and you’re still too reluctant to ask. In any other case, you would’ve already come in with various plants and plate sets, flowers and quotes smoothly decorating the dishes in various colours.
In front of a complete stranger, however, you don’t want to appear strange right away, and you know exactly that quite a number of people question your taste in putting meals on heartfelt, deep quotes.
The afternoon passes fast, your busy mind and chores around the apartment keeping you in check. The ten minutes you spend looking for a spider surely contribute to passing the time effectively as well before you finally let your exhausted body fall on your mattress. Now might be the first time in around two hours that you’re gripping your phone again, eyes widening when you see multiple missed calls and texts light up on your lockscreen.
And strangely, they’re all by your soon-to-be flatmate.
Curiosity rises in your chest as you think back to your conversations - never did he bother to call you, both of you comfortable with and sticking to text messages solely. You unlock your phone as you go through the three messages he has sent.
Jeon Jungkook [3:06 PM]: Hi, Y/N!
Jeon Jungkook [3:06 PM]: Call me whenever you’re free! Need to talk about something.
Jeon Jungkook [3:10 PM]: It’s sort of urgent.
Your fingers flutter over your screen as you think about what to do next. You’re sociable on usual occasions, not one to hide behind a shy butterfly personality. But something about calling him makes you nervous - you’re sure the main culprit is the picture his mother sent you not long ago. Although it was fairly blurred and taken from way too far away, you could see right away that he was a handsome man - you wonder whether his voice is just as alluring as his appearance.
You clear your throat for a moment before you press the dial button, taking a deep breath as you put on a smile on your face that he won’t be able to see anyway. And then, he picks up and quite literally knocks the breath out of you.
Not seldom have you heard your friends talk about their fondness of attractive voices; a concept that has been entirely incomprehensible to you until now. For you, a voice sounds annoying or it sounds pleasant - not sexy.
But Jeon Jungkook’s deep, melodious voice proves otherwise, a strange spark igniting in you when you hear him say, “Y/N, hey! Finally!”
He’s laughing, a breathy, soft chuckle that doesn’t indicate annoyance in any way, although he has every right to be pissed, considering the fact that you’re calling him back almost two hours later.
“Jungkook?”
“Yeah, yeah, it’s Jungkook! I’m sorry if I’m disturbing you. I figured you were busy doing stuff at the apartment.” You hear a voice announce a station in the background, and you feel like you recognise the name of the place, the faint familiarity telling you that he isn’t too far away.
“Ah, yes. I just finished. What’s up?”
He hums for a second, lost in thought as you stare at the dust floating in the air; and then, he talks again, the voice of his mother nothing compared to his honey covered one. “I know I told you I was going to arrive in ten days, but the trip was cut short and I’ll be there this evening! I’m switching trains right now and should be there in around three hours.”
Three hours? From ten days to this?
“Oh! Oh okay, uh- do you want me to prepare anything?”
You’re already on your feet, dozens of thoughts floating through your mind as you hear him pant. From what you perceive, he’s running, the bustling chaos and constant announcements around him so loud that you lift your phone away from your ear.
“No, no! Just wanted you to know. I can bring some dinner if you’d like. What’s your favourite food?”
You scramble your mind for your comfort meal, immediately remembering that it has been weeks since you’ve last eaten your dinner for lazy days. “If it’s not too troublesome for you - how about chicken strips with fries today?”
Jungkook chuckles a little, doors closing around him and muffling the noises temporarily as he says, “Sounds good. I’ll bring some on my way.”
And after that, your nerves go haywire for a whole long while. Living with someone isn’t that big of a deal - you know that. But moving in with someone you know nothing about? Downright terrifying.
Pacing through the living room doesn’t help, you notice that sooner than expected. Concentrating on your hair and make-up seems to calm you down; mostly, because your appearance resembles that of a scarecrow. But finding the make-up at all is a menace, every eyeliner and lipstick you own laying in multiple places and nearly impossible to find as the seconds tick by.
By the time Jungkook finally arrives, all you can concentrate on is the beast that growls in your stomach, the hunger so overwhelming that you nearly sprint to the door when you hear three firm knocks. The fact that you were lying upside down on your couch just a minute ago is immediately forgotten when you open the door, your hair sticking out at some parts as if you’ve just woken up.
But who could care about that anyhow if the literal representation of a Greek god is standing at your doorstep, carrying bags full of food and a smile that knocks the air out of your lungs? Whatever pictures you’ve seen of him, they do no justice to the out-of-this-world existence that is now shifting from one leg to another, greeting you with a saccharine sweet grin as he eyes you from top to bottom.
“Y/N!” he finally says, his voice so much smoother and lovelier in reality than it could ever be via call.
“Jungkook,” you answer, swallowing the knot in your throat before you realise that you’re ogling him entirely rudely with your lips turned downwards. Mustering a smile, you continue, “Nice to officially meet you!”
Going good. At least until now.
Of course no good thing can last - because as soon as the words leave you, you lift your palm to give him a handshake, too soon noticing that his hands are fully occupied. Although it has been barely a minute since you opened the door, you render yourself completely useless as an integrated part of society.
Idiot.
Every social skill leaves you before you disguise your faux-pas as a helpful offer, taking the bags from him gently as you step aside to welcome him in.
“Nice to meet you, too,” he answers, oblivious to your awkward action as he takes in the inner state of the apartment. And then, he looks at you again.
God, Jeon Jungkook is a three-course-meal.
Staring at him nearly makes you forget you’re hungry at all, instead craving so much more than just common food as he watches you with these mischievous eyes. Something behind them tells you that he might be thinking the same, because when you place the bags on your counter and let out a shaky breath, he’s closer to you than before.
He puts his palms on the counter next to the dinner, glancing directly into your soul before he says, “You’re... so pretty.”
Your blood flow seems to stop for a moment as you feel your brain short-circuit. For someone you’ve known for only a hot minute, he makes it easy for you to spiral into a near neanderthal stage, suddenly forgetting how words work before you pull yourself together and somehow manage to answer, “It’s the… make-up.”
And then a shrill laugh leaves your lips, one that dies down immediately when the noises of the opening bags overshadow you. Jungkook’s smirk doesn’t falter as he lays the boxes of food in front of you before he brings his arms down and balances his weight on them.
“I mean, I’ll see pretty soon what you look like without make-up, right? Or do you sleep with it on?”
You furrow your eyebrows at him, calmness slowly falling over you as you get rid of the nervosity you felt all evening long. “Of course not.”
“See?” He lifts his body again, tapping the counter a few times before he grabs his portion and approaches the couch. “How do you like it here so far?”
“It’s cozy. I didn’t get to see your room yet, but if it’s anyhow similar to mine, then you’ll love it here,” you explain, plummeting onto the chair in front of him as you eagerly open your box of food. “Oh, I actually experimented a little with the dishwasher and the washing machine. They’re super easy to use and have some great functions.”
Jungkook laughs again, bunny teeth on full display making you join for a moment before he questions, “That’s what gets you going, huh? Laundry stuff.”
You look at him with a playfully offended look as you shove some fries into your mouth. Words die in your throat as you taste the incredibly greasy food, your expression slipping for the tiniest of seconds before you collect yourself again. Telling him now that he chose an entirely wrong place to buy dinner from seems too rude - so you guess, you have to endure whatever stomach ache this might bring.
“Tell me you don’t like clean clothes.” You try to eat when he looks away, but to your chagrin, he never does. Maybe he really does find you pretty.
He shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly, sniffling as he tells you, “If it was up to me, we’d just go back in time and run around naked.”
You tilt your head when you realise that he isn’t joking, biting your lip at the thought of him being entirely bare before you shake the picture away again.
Don’t fucking imagine this stranger naked, Y/N!
“You really don’t seem to have a filter in your brain.”
He shapes his mouth to an O, bringing a hand to his chest. “Me? What gave that away?”
People are usually not difficult to crack. In your case, most of your acquaintances became acquaintances after you flashed a sweet smile in their direction, exchanging some interesting words until they felt comfortable, home. While you always find yourself at the giving end, it feels different to be the receiver of this feeling - because no matter how short the time was that he’s been here, you feel relief wash over you. You’re sure Jungkook knows how to make his conversation partners like and love him.
“Anyway, these strips and fries are horrible,” he suddenly says, and your eyes widen before you let out an uncontrolled laugh. He joins immediately, endeared by the sound of your voice as he tells you again, “I’m serious! Do you like them?”
“No,” you admit truthfully through your giggle, placing your dinner on the table, “Pretty gross, gotta say.”
“You have to tell me that next time!” he exclaims, gleeful sounds filling the room as you throw your head back, loving the irritated expression that creeps up his face. When you look at him again, you see crinkles around his eyes, small dimples forming on his cheeks and crescent eyes sparkling in the warm light of the living room.
“You know,” you begin when your laughter finally stops, “you’re very handsome, too.”
Jungkook scoffs before he picks up his chicken strips again, shaking his head in disbelief. But the blush on his face is clearly visible to you, even with his head hanging low, beautiful and sweet to look at as you decide that you are already fond of your new friend.
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As it turns out, Jungkook is a pleasant flatmate after all. His tired groans and the sound of the dishes wake you up in the morning; in the evenings, you always come home to the sight of him either playing a game or eating something while watching TV. Most of the time, he keeps to himself and leaves some food for you in the kitchen - and you’re more than satisfied with this.
It only occurs to you two weeks after sharing the four walls with him that Jungkook is utterly and incorrigibly lazy. While you’re a diligent student who keeps track of her laundry and makes sure to wash the dishes on days you’re assigned to, he does not. More than once do you catch him drifting off into sleep with the whole washing basin overflowing with dirty plates and pots, and waking him up always seems like an option you shouldn’t give in to, considering that he is still somewhat of a stranger.
Until today.
It’s the middle of the night when you nearly crawl into the kitchen with half opened eyes, your hands searching for your favourite cup to quench your unbearable thirst. Saturdays are for Jungkook to take care of the pile in the sink, but when you attempt to place the cup under the running water, a loud clang shakes you awake as your eyes shoot open in the darkness.
A sigh leaves your lips as you calm down from the noise, frustration growing hot inside you before you place the cup on the counter and march to Jungkook’s closed bedroom door. Your fist already halfway in the air, you prepare for a scolding speech - but then, you lean in, and even through the thick wooden material, you can hear his soft snores.
You might be angry, but you’re not cruel. Despite all his mess, you know that he works hard, bringing in money for half the rent and groceries, and he definitely deserves to rest at least at the weekend.
Maybe it’s smarter to confront him in the morning when you’re relaxed, less irritated and in a friendlier mood.
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But the friendlier mood soon evolves to sheer annoyance when you see him walk out of his room and throw his dirty shirt onto the couch chair - the one that is only inches away from you as you sip on some coffee and eat your beloved toast with jelly. 
Jungkook has a habit of running around half naked; at first, you were baffled by his shamelessness, and the fact that he didn’t care what you saw surprised you each day you woke up. After the initial getting-used-to-your-hot-flatmate process, you can now merely roll your eyes at him as you place your plate on the table and call his name.
“We should talk.”
He halts in his steps, fingers running through his dishevelled hair and eyes squinting as he looks at you through his tiredness. And when he turns to you fully, you nearly choke on your own saliva.
No underwear. You’re sure.
His sweatpants hug his waist smoothly, the fabric accentuating not only his strong thighs but the clearly visible bulge behind them as well. Okay. Maybe you lied. Maybe you aren’t used to his appearance after all.
You try to avert your eyes from the obviously gracious package as quickly as you can, but the slight smirk that creeps up his face speaks volumes. You feel heat rush to your cheeks before you clear your throat and motion him to sit down next to you.
“What’s up? How are we this fine morning?” he asks as he falls back into the couch right next to you, his body way too close to yours and the loose muscle in his pants bouncing way too much at the impact of-
“We’re good. But we could be better.”
Jungkook leans back against the cushions, head tilting as he opens his eyes entirely, slowly getting used to the light of the day. A glance over to the sink shows the still untouched dishes, and you inhale deeply before you explain the situation. He listens carefully, doesn’t even judge you when you seem to complain about numerous things in one single breath - and when you’re done, he places a soft hand on your shoulder, a genuinely apologetic look gracing his features.
“Why didn’t you tell me before?” he inquires, squeezing your shoulder lightly. It feels good - nearly like a massage…
“Because we barely know each other,” you mumble, trying hard to get your mind out of the gutter as you look into his soft, melting eyes. “I didn’t want to come across as if I had a stick up my butt.”
For whatever reason, his eyes shift down to your mentioned body part at your words, settling there for only a moment before he brings his right leg up to place it over his left, the crooked smile so cocky as he says, “Y/N, we live together. We probably will for quite some time. It’s fine to complain when you’re annoyed by something I do.”
“I get that but-”
“I’m serious,” he interrupts, patting your back once before he stands up again, “I know I can be difficult sometimes, so please let me know when you’re bothered. Ever.”
He buries his hands in the pockets of his sweatpants, graciously moving the fabric in a way that you can cleanse your thoughts. Taking idle steps forward, his eyes settle on the mountain of dishes, but before he reaches the kitchen island, he stops in his tracks, turns around and shoots you a rueful look.
“I’m honestly sorry. I didn’t want to make you uncomfortable,” he admits - and for some odd reason, you falter at his following smile immediately, every annoyance fading as you take in his genuine words.
Whatever effect Jeon Jungkook already has on your emotions and your body has you questioning every doubt you ever had about living with someone.
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As exhausting as the thought of doing chores seemed only a few weeks ago, conversing and getting to know Jungkook is a whole new pleasant experience; a process you embrace openly as soon as you start to understand his mind, hobbies and words. 
It turns out that Jungkook is easy to excite, a bundle of happiness that takes what life gives him; talking to him feels adventurous even in the comfort of your walls, and not once has he managed to not make you laugh about one of his dumb jokes.
And as much as you appeared to be the cute, innocent woman Jungkook met for the first time one month and a half ago, the more he gathered that you’re a loud mess that literally never shuts up. Sometimes, he wonders if you have a filter in your brain at all - and each time you prove that you don’t, he can’t help but look at you in the most endearing way.
Your gentle and yet fierce personality definitely makes it hard for him - and he notices way too soon.
“Look,” he mumbles one evening as you both attempt to cook a newly found recipe. He redirects his attention from the pot filled with rice to your pan, taking the spatula from your hand before he skillfully works his way through the chicken pieces. When he does it, his movements seem so elegant, different from everything you tried to do.
While you’re not the best chef you know, you mostly get the minimal effort done, enough to feed your hunger for the day. But when Jungkook lifts the pan and takes care of the sizzling food in the pan, you stare in awe - if a man while cooking isn’t hot, then you don’t know what is.
“If you keep your eye on the whole meal, you can make sure it doesn’t get burnt. Look, this one,” he explains, pointing at one specific piece that already looks way too overcooked, “was at one spot for too long. Don’t forget to flip.”
The fact that he’s explaining the most basic aspects of cooking to you, should be awkward to you. But something about Jungkook’s behaviour and treatment never allows you to dwell on your mistakes for too long; with him, you always feel more human than you ever have, like you’re allowed to be flawed and short on knowledge in specific areas.
He always assures you that it’s alright to not succeed on the first try. In hindsight, you feel guilty for calling him out the way you did; and on top of everything, about something as small as dirty dishes.
“Open your mouth,” he orders, his fork spearing a piece of meat on it before he brings it to your lips.
“Wow, there are other ways to flirt.” You let out a giggle as you accept his offer, hissing as you throw the scalding food around in your mouth.
Oh, there’s that, too.
Since you and Jungkook have become comfortable enough around each other, your flirting skills have shot through the roof, the subtle jokes and lovely words bringing you closer with each day. Your friendship blooms like your plants do, and it’s almost as if you’re seeing your own progress according to how fast your succulents grow.
“Shut up,” he says before shaking his head, nodding to your mouth as he continues, “If I wanted what you’re suggesting, I’d have my ways to get it.”
You almost choke as soon as he mumbles these words, a breathy laugh leaving his chest when he takes in your shocked expression.
“Two can play the game, lovely,” he tells you, wiggling the fork in front of your face before he turns off the stove. Wiping his hands on the apron, he takes out two plates, shooing you away from his workplace before he ends the cooking process.
One thing you must admit is that everything Jungkook does apart from playing games or watching TV, he does well. In that sense, you have caught him singing from the top of his lungs multiple times, his voice remaining angelic no matter how ridiculously he tried to sing.
He also clearly knows how to move his body, dancing skills so apparent that you feel almost bad joining him at times. You don’t know how to move to save your life.
He shovels some rice into a small bowl before he carefully places it upside down on a plate. Slowly lifting it, you see a perfect igloo-shaped mountain of rice that he decorates with a single leaf of coriander before placing the seasoned chicken around it. He repeats the whole thing as you watch in awe, baffled by the effort he’s putting in your dinner while you’re always one to messily pour food onto your plate and get done with your meals in a heartbeat.
“And voilà!” Jungkook says proudly, presenting you your plate with a wide smile as he hands it to you. “Bon appetit!”
As he repeats the process for himself, you make your way to the couch to place your dinner on the table, waiting patiently before he joins you with a smile as if you’ve complimented him. “You can start first, you know?”
“I like to wait,” you tell him, but as soon as he sits down, you start drooling, quick to set the plate on your lap before you dig in.
He chuckles at the sight as he takes the first bite with you. For a moment, you both hum, nodding in a satisfactory manner before you turn to look at each other.
“Amazing,” you admit, gathering some of the leftover sauce from your lip with your fork. Your cheeks are glowing nearly as brightly as your eyes from the relentless heat. Jungkook’s mind drifts off for a second too long as he takes you in - it’s neither the first time he gets lost in you nor the first time of you not noticing.
“You’re amazing,” he answers in a heartbeat as he averts his eyes, focusing on his deliciously crafted chicken again. “And thank you. A very carefully developed hobby of mine.”
He moves his head as if he’s hearing music in his head and his body moves slightly in a way that faintly resembles lazy dance moves. They say that when someone dances while eating, it’s someone to keep - and Jungkook proves that now. He isn’t just handsome - he is an entire package, sassy one day and adorable the next.
“Cooking, you mean?” Jungkook just nods in response to your question, still dancing to the tune of nothing as you continue. “That’s great. It’s important to have at least one hobby.”
He finishes his bite before he looks at you, nodding again as he ventures into an even deeper conversation, “Especially when it’s in some way important to you. Like - do you know these types of hobbies that just feel so sacred and personal to you, though you know half the world is doing it? Like drawing or uh, I don’t know, pottery?”
“Ah. Yeah, I know what you mean. And cooking is just that for you?”
“Mhm,” he makes, your eyes shifting to his already half empty plate while you’ve only eaten three bites, “what about you? Is there something like that for you?”
In some ways, thoughts like these have even crossed your mind on multiple occasions when you chased your little hobby in your leisure time. It’s fascinating for you that Jungkook feels similar, even if it’s about something as mundane as cooking.
“When I was still in elementary school, my teacher would always gift me a little book with simple poems at the end of the school year. They were just a few lines long and super easy to understand, but my little Y/N brain perceived them as incredibly deep and… strong.”
As you tell him your past tale, he listens intently, maintaining eye contact with a constantly interested gaze as you ramble on. “And I guess this hobby grew in teenage years…”
“Oh, were you one of these edgy teens who read short quotes about dead, bleeding roses and faded love?” Jungkook interrupts, laughing heartily before he puts his plate down and leans back on the couch comfortably.
“No,” you deadpan before you click your tongue; but then you join in his laughter, the shake of your head expressing your simultaneous exasperation and adoration, “I liked Poe and Angelou… a lot of basic poets as well as smaller ones. But yeah, this is probably a hobby I cherish just ‘cause…”
You squint, trying to think of the right words as Jungkook waits, and when you finally find a way to explain, he sees a bulb light up above your head. “Yes, because it always felt like it belonged to me. Like the poems were my possessions. Similar to what you said - half of the world reads these things. I’m pretty sure everyone knows Emily Dickinson. But when I crawled into bed and memorised the lines by reading them over and over again? It felt like it wasn’t the world with its poems but me with these small stories.”
Much like every word orbited around you back then, Jungkook feels his thoughts spin around you. The further you decide to speak, the more he realises that you’re more than just an assiduous student - because your mind runs deep, and your intellect as well as your emotions lie on a pedestal that’s way too high up for him to reach.
He knows it’s probably not smart to put anyone up there - after all, egos shoot up in no time, and people only stay humble for so long. But with a sweet creature like you, it’s hard to not see the beauty of the universe and beyond that you as a being capture so effortlessly.
“That’s an amazing way to see things,” he says quietly, the atmosphere in the flat so serene that you feel your whole body relax, “And I bet those poems love you just as much.”
You giggle lightly, sighing as you bring the fork from your lips back to your plate. “Literature knows only love and comfort without an end.”
“But,” he moves closer to you before he nudges your sides, stealing a piece of chicken as he asks, “what if I told you I don’t know about Emily Dickinson?”
“Then I’d say you’re lying.” You look into his stern face, a gasp escaping you as you move back. But then, he starts laughing, crinkles appearing around his crescent eyes again before you slap his shoulder painfully. “Oh, shut up.”
“Maybe I’ll make annoying you my new personal hobby,” he tells you, ducking a little when you throw a soft cushion at him. He stands up a second before you hit his chest with another pillow, playfully groaning as he hurries to protect the tableware from your sudden attacks.
“And that’d actually be something that belongs to me only!” you hear him say from where you sit, your head falling back as you fall into a spiral of laughter again.
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While the world changes around you and gardens bloom even brighter than when you moved in, your apartment seems to go through similar changes as well. The old couch that stood in your living room has long been replaced by a beautiful, white, faux-leather one. Even the rusty TV that barely allowed you to read the subtitles on Netflix has been sold by Jungkook’s efforts, and instead of it, you gather in front of a flatscreen every weekend.
By now, nights like these have become routine to you both: after interacting less than you want to during weekdays, you mostly crawl into your rooms after work, the comfort of your soft mattresses everything your body longs for at the end of the day. But now that your semester is finally done and summer holidays have approached, it’s easier for you to give in to leisury pleasures.
Jungkook? Not so much.
With his job at the grocery store, he’s busy even on weekends, the only relaxation for him being when he settles on the couch with you or meets his best friend Jimin for a drink or two.
In that sense, you were at first all ready to watch a Ghibli movie of his choice tonight before a heavy storm hit your town, forcing you to return to your rooms and watch the seconds tick by. While you suggested moving ahead with your plans, Jungkook declined, the rainy weather and incessant noise of lightning dampening his mood too much to enjoy the night.
You can’t blame him for his decision - the expression he wore when he came home drenched was one of a wet poodle: helpless and annoyed, entirely pissed off that the weather forecast didn’t inform you of obviously heavy rain today.
As if this isn’t enough, the light in your peripheral view starts flickering as you lay on your bed, your brain contemplating whether you saw it actually happen or just blinked for a few seconds too fast. But then, the light shuts down entirely, and you’re stuck in full darkness before you hear a collective “Oooooh!” through your open window.
You sigh before you turn, burying your face in the pillow and readying yourself for sleep, the hopes of a better morning already high. Because at the moment, you can’t do much more anyway - your idiotic self didn’t charge your phone, the battery almost dying and every other device in your apartment turned off now. The fact that you don’t have a generator in case of a blackout doesn’t help with cheering up your mood particularly.
Soon, you hear three knocks at your door, and after a muffled permission, Jungkook steps into your room. Lifting your head, you notice that he’s using the flashlight of his phone, the painful illumination blinding you as you groan.
“Jungkook, fuck. Turn it off!”
“Y/N,” he whispers back, a contrast to your loud complaint as he leans down impossibly close to you, “you’re still awake?”
“Just pretending.” He places his phone upside down on your night table, lighting up the room enough for you to see his forlorn doe eyes staring at you in something that almost looks like… fear?
You sit up instantaneously, placing a hand on his and pulling him down onto the edge of the bed as you ask, “Are you okay? What happened?”
“I- uh,” he starts, rubbing his face in exhaustion. “Is it okay if I stay here for a while? We could talk. Or play a game as long as my battery lasts?”
You’re still holding his hand, and he relaxes under your touch, entirely sure that you’re not even noticing how your thumb is grazing his skin softly. As his heartbeat slows, he looks at the way the worry is so plainly plastered across your features, and before he can find out why this affects him as much as it does, he feels a sting in his chest. When you nod without questioning him in the slightest, his shoulders fall - nearly as if a weight has been lifted that he carried with him for too long.
You don’t have to be the most Einstein-esque genius to realise that Jungkook doesn’t like the darkness - the way a faint light always glows from under his door at night is telling enough.
You lay back down on your pillow as you try to distract him, listening to the sound of the rain before you ask, “Did you eat?”
He nods. He tells you that he’s thankful that you made the lasagna today and left some for him too, soon delving into details about how the meat was cooked perfectly and the lasagna sheets soaked thoroughly, not one bit still raw. You’re happy he’s the one talking - you mostly feel like your attempts to cheer up your friends fail miserably whenever you try.
Thankfully, Jungkook is excessively into cooking and rambles on, your eyes soon falling shut as you listen to his voice as if it’s a lullaby. And when he notices, he squeezes your hand a little, never letting go of it before he whispers, “Do you want me to leave? You must be tired.”
Your eyelids flutter open before you yawn, shaking your head violently as you pull him down, although he isn’t even in the slightest implying that he intends to stand up. He almost falls on you, his shoulder landing right next to your head and eliciting a coughy laugh out of him as you apologise.
“Don’t leave. It’s fine. Tell me how you feel, though!” your half sleepy voice demands. He can’t help but stare at you in awe - somehow, you’re even prettier when you’re drowsy like this.
Teeth worry his lower lip for a moment before he jokes, “I’m fine. But you seem to be in a cuddly mood.”
“Mmmh,” you hum, flashing a grin in his direction as you raise an eyebrow, “What if I say I am?”
Yes - you flirt all the time. Even if it’s just to tease and without real feelings behind it (or so you think). But when he actually brings his legs up with a grunt and lets your hand go to pull you into his chest, you gasp audibly, eyes shooting open in shock entirely.
“Jungko-”
“Come on. You’re tired. I’ll just stay here until you fall asleep and then leave, okay?” he assures, words so soft and his voice coated in such a tender tone that you feel your heartbeat increase. Slender fingers settle on the small of your back, and you bring your own up to place them on his strong bicep.
You nod against his chest, still wordlessly wondering what confidence overcame Jungkook to find yourself in his arms like this. But maybe, you think, he finds comfort wrapped around you, too - because his heart thumps steadily against your ear, his hands tracing your back up and down soothingly.
“Are you really okay?” you ask him again.
Jungkook sighs; even when he tries to take care of you, you’re worried about him, thinking of every way possible to make him feel better. He noticed this behaviour in you a while ago - especially on days when you paced through all the rooms, calling your family or friends over and over again when they caught something as harmless as a cold.
“I’m alright.”
“Promise?”
You feel him bury his mouth in your hair, the phantom touch of a kiss sending shivers down your spine as he whispers, “I promise.”
Silence falls over you shortly, his breathing and the rain serving as pleasant background music as you feel your body relax. His fingers draw circles on your shirt before he pulls you closer by a bit. His chest rumbles when he speaks again, vibrations in your ear so soothing, so lovely.
“Y/N?”
“Yeah…”
“Do you have a poem for me?”
The question catches you off guard. No matter what you expected him to say now, it wasn’t this request. You search your brain for lines he might like, but the sheer amount of love, hate, sadness, family, friends and society poems that flash through your mind have you malfunctioning for a second.
“Which one?”
“Any poem. I want you to tell me one.”
The floating images in your head come to a halt as you settle on one of your favourite poetic pieces and zoom into the paragraphs you love the most. You clear your mind and your throat, trying to keep yourself awake and picking out a few lines as you recite, “Thy belt of straw and ivy buds, thy coral clasps and amber studs. All these in me no means can move, to come to thee and be thy love.”
You stop, gauging his reaction as you look up at him. His eyes open when yours meet his face, and he smiles down at you sweetly and with unleashed kindness in his pupils. A small nod encourages you further, and when he asks you to go on, you place your ear back to where it was before.
“But could youth last and love still breed, had joys no date nor age no need,” your words become slower, your voice a mere mumble as you start to drift off into sleep, the last two lines leaving you nearly as if you’re drunk, “Then these delights- my mind might move... to live with thee and be thy…”
And then, you’re gone, dozed off against his firm chest as he sighs again, arms loosening around you before he finishes your sentence.
“...love.”
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To think that Jungkook and you would get even closer after that or take one or two steps further was a foolish thought of you, no doubt. Because even now, you think back to the morning after when you woke up to an empty bed, the mattress beside you cold as you blinked into the too bright morning sun.
“How do you feel?” you’d asked when you saw him,  merely receiving a thumbs up as he smiled with a mouth full of cereal. He never approached you regarding last night, never even talked about the touches you’d shared.
With everything you started thinking about him and your relationship, things felt intimate; almost not as if you had been strangers just two months ago. But with your routine settling in and life going on, it soon became evident that Jungkook was destined to be your best friend. One who understands, lets you live, lets you make mistakes and learn.
Someone who you know you can rely on when days become gloomy and have fun with when you get overzealous to try something specific.
And that’s it. Not more, not less.
You sigh as you stroll through the supermarket, glancing at the prices of fruit as you realise that right now is not the time to overthink anything that relates to your flatmate. Instead, you direct your frustration towards the overpriced strawberries, the number shocking you enough to complain out loud, surrounded by innocent customers.
“This economy won’t even allow me to enjoy fruit in peace.”
As soon as the brain outage happens, you glance around, pressing your lips together apologetically until you hear a deep laugh behind you. You’re ready to pout at the man who’s enjoying your misery so blatantly, but when you turn around, you face the brightest light in the universe personally.
His hair is smooth, dark, beautifully shiny as his full lips curl into a breathtaking smile. With eyes inexplicably deep and intense, he looks at you in delight, and you feel your legs give out before you remember that you’re in no place right now to collapse like the idiot that you are.
Superficial, that’s what you are.
You shut your inner voice up as you listen to the stranger explain, “Don’t buy them in this market. There’s another one around the corner, a way smaller shop with way better strawberries.”
“Ah,” you say, blinking a few times before licking your dry lips, “is that so?”
“I swear! Besides,” he tells you, stepping closer to inspect the package you’re holding, “you never know what they inject in these. Better to stay safe.”
You don’t tell him that bio-fruit is even more expensive than these and that his statement of getting them cheaper and healthier somewhere else might not be as valid as he thinks. But you contain your smartass, locking it somewhere deep inside your brain as you tuck a strand of your hair behind your ear.
“I’m Taehyung, by the way,” he introduces himself, a hand coming up for you to shake which you grip gladly, an inviting smile decorating your features as you tilt your head.
“Pretty name. I’m Y/N.”
“Pretty name back.”
His large palm rubs the nape of his neck, toying with his hair as his tongue darts out to wet his lips. You notice that they are mesmerising, rose-tinted, so full and symmetric - they remind you of strawberries, and something in you already wants to have a sweet taste of them.
“So uh, this might seem super sudden, but if you’re free, I would like to invite you to some dessert? I make some mean strawberry shortcakes,” he continues, a shy undertone in his voice that you can’t help but find endearing as hell.
“Dessert without having dinner?” you ask with a tilted head, moving the small shopping cart back and forth.
“Well, I mean, I can… cook some dinner, too, no problem.”
“What if you’re an axe murderer and I just don’t know it yet?”
He chuckles at your words, a boxy grin leaving you speechless as he shrugs. “Yeah, true, you can’t know. But what better way to go than after tasting the best shortcakes ever?”
The laughter never ends as you finally oblige, paying for the few things you’ve decided to buy until you step out of the shop. Taehyung proves to be the perfect gentleman: not only does he carry your bag, but he keeps eye contact as well, always one to keep the conversation going - even when you feel it coming to an end gradually.
You soon learn that he doesn’t live too far away; you must have only walked for around seven minutes until you reach his apartment, a cozy, little one bedroom place that is filled with aesthetic things that catch your eyes right away. You notice that he likes the colour beige - a hue boring for a lot of people you know, but a soft, lovely comfort for you.
“If you want, you can go look for an axe,” he tells you when you enter shyly, winking at you before he adds, “just to be sure.”
You follow him to where he stands with a grin, gulping down a glass of water he hands you to get rid of the heat before you suddenly find yourself in front of his stove. You tell him firmly that he won’t be working here alone - if he wants to make you some cakes, he will have to taste your semi-horrible Pasta Arrabiata.
Surprisingly, it turns out to be quite decent - but nothing can compare to the melting, wonderful, heavenly taste that the bakery spreads across your tastebuds, and for a moment you forget that he’s here before you hum at him with wide eyes.
“Told you!” he rejoices proudly, chest sticking out as he pats himself on the shoulder.
“You weren’t lying, gotta admit.” As you take another bite, your eyes roll back; and Taehyung looks at you in awe - no girl has ever been this open and giving right away, and seeing all shyness leave the atmosphere between you, is something he finds pleasantly refreshing.
He keeps nodding at you, eyebrows wiggling with confidence until he suddenly says, “Just pretty things for a pretty girl.”
You feel something buzz in the pit of your stomach, and you try to remark something in return - but before you can succeed, he leans forward, a thumb coming up to the corner of your mouth before he backs away again. “You had some…”
Heat creeps up your chest and face, and you shake your head with a scoff, whispering “How cliché, huh?” as you finish the last bite.
You decide to stay just a little longer, intrigued by stories of his travels and favourite songs until you find yourself losing track of time. Dusk overcomes your town and stars sparkle outside, the warmth of his light bulbs dipping his room into an even more beautiful museum. It happens sometime after your retelling of personal tales of broken hearts and past break-ups that he leans in and presses his pillowy lips against yours.
The kiss leads to fervent touches, fervent touches to bare bodies and bare bodies to something you would’ve never imagined a few hours ago. In all that fever, you never notice all the incoming messages and calls from the man who’s waiting for you at home impatiently.
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Jungkook hears the school girl giggles before he knocks at your door, heart dropping a few floors when he realises how often you’ve started spending your time on your phone and without him.
His hands are still floury from kneading the pizza dough, so he opens the door with his foot, finding you lying sideways on your bed as you speak into your phone. You look up at him with a smile, telling the person on the other end to hold on before you cover the speaker.
“Hey, Koo.”
“I wanted to uh, ask if you want to help with the pizza? I’m done with the dough.”
There’s a laziness in his voice that seems new to you, a lifelessness that almost sounds like he’s waiting to let something out; as if he’s eager to hear an explanation about things that might be going on with you.
Your lips form an O, nodding enthusiastically as you tell him, “I’ll be there in two minutes, okay?”
“Sure,” he replies before he leaves, trying to close the door with his elbow on the handle; but as he doesn’t manage to shut it entirely, your voice still seeps through the crack clearly.
“Will you pick me up from work tomorrow?” A short pause, another chuckle. “Always a gentleman. Yeah. See you tomorrow then.”
Jungkook steps away from the door when he hears you move, approaching the kitchen counter and keeping himself busy with the dough as he hears you chime, “Pizza day!”
He wished he could laugh at your ardour, but all that floats in his mind is that you’ll be gone tomorrow - on your weekly Friday game night.
But who is he to control your life anyway?
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You’re sure the mirror shows a prettier self of you.
Because the dress that is hugging your waist so perfectly, accentuating your body and emphasizing your ass is surely an apple for anyone’s eye. You turn and pose in a confidence you haven’t experienced for so long - and maybe it’s all of Taehyung’s words that have you feeling this way. But regardless, you know you won’t let go of this euphoria for as long as it so gracefully decides to stick with your insecure self.
You flinch when Jungkook places his chin on your shoulders out of nowhere, meeting your eyes in your reflection before he says, “Why do we look so gorgeous today?”
With a roll of your eyes and a smug smirk, you ask him if he’s talking about himself, but he only scoffs, lifting his head and placing his hands on your arms tightly. “Honestly. You look like a flower.”
“Specify which flower.”
A soft slap lands on your skin and he shakes his head before flashing you a bunny smile again. “Mmmmh.”
You turn around to face him, hands landing on your hips as you watch him stroke his nonexistent beard. “Yes?”
“Blue dress. Definitely a forget-me-not.”
“Favourite.”
Jungkook’s smile doesn’t stay as long as you’re used to, and he buries his hands in the pockets of his shorts as he inquires, “Are you going out with your boyfriend?”
With his insides burning, he admits to himself how much he hates the fact that Taehyung gets to see and touch you like this while he has to wait right here, hoping that you still think of him while you’re away. Jealousy is nasty, an absolutely disgusting poison - but there’s no way he can stop it; not when you look and smile like this, not when it’s you in all your glory and beauty, inside and out.
The glow on your face is the only thing that keeps him from despising Taehyung entirely. The way you seem so happy and content fills Jungkook with fondness and pain simultaneously; loving that you feel good but loathing that he’s not the reason for it.
“We’re meeting in an hour, yeah.”
You look into the mirror again, reapplying the lipstick that hasn’t even faded yet before checking if your teeth have become victim to the nude colour.
But before Jungkook can reply, a firm knock startles you, a guest you didn’t expect waiting on the other side as if on cue. You shoot Jungkook an exploring look, the question “Yours?” written on your face to which he only shrugs his shoulders.
In a few steps, he is at the door, looking through the peephole before he backs away and pushes the handle down. To your utter surprise, both your and Jungkook’s eyes meet those of an exciting Taehyung, his large hands wrapped around a bouquet of beautiful purple flowers and his knuckles pale. But when he looks into the face of your flatmate, he steps away slightly, looking over his shoulder to make sure he is standing in front of the correct apartment.
“Uh - is Y/N here?” his baritone voice asks, looking past Jungkook’s shoulder and finding the answer to his own question when he detects you standing in the middle of the small room.
Your fingers clutch the fabric of your dress tightly, teeth gritting in tension when you realise that you never actually told Taehyung that you don’t live alone but with your incredibly beautiful, currently shirtless friend.
“Tae! What are you doing here?” you breathe, panic apparent in your eyes as Taehyung enters, lowering the bouquet in his hands.
Despite dating him for three weeks already, you failed to give him the most basic information about your life - and you can’t resent him from looking the way he does right now: disappointed, curious, confused.
“So you’re the Taehyung she keeps talking about,” Jungkook remarks behind your boyfriend, an eyebrow raised teasingly as he closes the door with a soft thud.
“That’s me,” the man in question replies, not leaving your face as he looks at you with a question mark written on his forehead, “and you are?”
And finally, he turns around, both men glaring at each other as if they are about to attack each other’s throats like wild cats. For a split moment, Jungkook’s gaze meets yours, and when he looks back at Taehyung, his expression relaxes endlessly - but not in the way you’d like. You wonder what he’s thinking - where the melancholy on his face is coming from suddenly.
But you think you know him well enough to understand that something is wrong. He’s not angry, no - not anyhow irritated either. He looks sad and so, so betrayed. You can’t entirely pinpoint why, but you make a mental note in your mind to ask him later.
“He’s my... flatmate, Tae,” you answer eventually, placing a hand on the nape of his neck as you explain, “we’ve been living together for almost three months. But we’re just friends. His- um-”
You walk around his body to face him, both your palms settling on his cheeks to make him look at you. And when he does, you smile at him softly, his face not pained but still a little questioning. “His mom suggested this apartment since it’s cheaper to share and Jungkook was looking for a co-tenant, too.”
“Just a friend?” Taehyung repeats - and although you can’t see Jungkook, you can almost imagine the way he’s shifting from one leg to another, hoping that the awkward situation ends soon, so he can continue playing his games.
That’s just what you think - with your back turned to him, you don’t notice how his face falls and arms drop to his sides. You don’t see his chest deflate; don’t know that his mouth twitches uncomfortably as he watches you caress Taehyung’s cheeks.
“Yeah. I promise.”
“She’s right, man,” Jungkook’s voice agrees, but you still observe Taehyung, looking for signs of disbelief. And when nothing comes, you feel his body relax, the breath he was holding now finally releasing. “Nothing happening here.”
And then, suddenly, Taehyung laughs, a honeysweet chuckle that allows his eyes to twinkle in genuine happiness and relief. One palm brushing your hair from your face, he leans down before his lips land on yours, electricity flowing through your body as you reciprocate the kiss immediately.
It only occurs to you how weird it must be for Jungkook when he’s already gone, the spot where he was standing just a minute ago empty when you turn around.
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“Is Jungkook in love with you?”
Cuddling on the couch at dawn while solving sudoku puzzles does not include questions like these in your mind. For you, it means happy laughter, stupid teasing and bad jokes. Asking you what your flatmate might or might not feel for you is not on your usual menu.
“What?” you ask Taehyung as you look at his sun-drenched features.
“Listen, I’m not jealous or scared of him stealing you. But if he is in love with you, this might not be the healthiest setup between you.”
With this, he means living together, you’re sure. But admittedly, your thoughts never drifted to this possibility extensively. Yes, when you still felt lost in what Jungkook is to you, you often questioned what he might think about you two, but since Taehyung and you became official, you never bothered to stay hung up on this topic for too long.
Especially since Jungkook never acted like he needed you to be more than this. Bold nature, honesty written in his bones, always direct and fearless - that’s what he is. That’s what makes him your best friend.
“I don’t think he is. And if I’m wrong, then I don’t know it,” you let him know, but he only shifts behind you, pressing the pencil into the sudoku book as he clicks his tongue.
Then, he starts doodling hearts on the paper, sighing deeply as he tells you, “I guess I just don’t want to share you.”
“You’re not sharing me, Tae,” you assure, pressing your body back into his as he lets out a small, quiet moan. One of his arms wraps around your torso, the air of the AC grazing your skin pleasantly as you lay under a thin blanket.
Your mother never understood the concept of burying your body under a blanket while having turned on the AC, and you reckoned you were genuinely strange - until Taehyung suggested the same exact thing before you cuddled up in each other’s arms like you are now.
“Can you say that again?” he asks softly, lips ghosting over your earlobe and causing a tremble that takes over your whole torso.
“Not sharing me...”
He pulls you into him after placing the sudoku book on the table, intertwining your fingers with his as his mouth presses gentle kisses on the side of your neck. You hum in content, breathing fastening as you try to concentrate on his words.
“Do you know the fairytale ‘A spoonful of heart’?” he asks you, his voice husky, deep, so inviting.
“Mh, I don’t think I do.” His fingers explore the skin under your shirt carefully, drawing lines and circles onto it as you close your eyes in delight. “You could tell me, though.”
“Well…” He traces your body down, soon reaching the hem of your shorts before he pulls them aside and slips under them to brush his digits against your sensitive bud. It should be strange - talking about fairytales while he pleases you on your couch. But someone like Taehyung can even turn a situation like this into something you welcome.
While his presence and existence proves to be one of an angel on Earth everyday, he never holds back when it comes to physical contact. As adults who are both experienced and deprived when it comes to sex, you didn’t wait for intimacy long, soon noticing that Taehyung liked you enough after just a month and half to take you wherever and whenever he can.
Whether that means to bend you over his desk or push you up against a wall isn’t important - but what you know is that you’re both too hungry to keep your hands off each other for longer than you’re forced to.
“A fairy… almost as pretty as you,” he starts, stopping to moan with you when he circles your clit, “lives in a whole different universe with magical powers. But she’s lonely.”
His lips leave a trail of chaste kisses along your cheek before he bites your jaw gently, continuing as you squirm in his grip, “So she decides to make herself a friend. But anytime she talks to him, he doesn’t answer, no matter how many clothes she brings or how many names she gives him.”
“Tae…”
“And then she notices that it’s feelings that her new friend needs. A spoonful of her heart. So what do you think happens in the end?”
He waits for your answer, gripping you tightly to stop your excessive movements, harmless kisses transforming into open mouthed ones that leave your neck wet, marks already blooming.
“Tell me what happens, Tae…” you moan out, hissing when his actions on your swollen bud speed up.
“Her friend comes to life,” he concludes as you turn to look at him, molten gemstones staring back at you fondly before he adds, “you make me feel like you’re the one bringing me to life in our story.”
And with that, your lips lock, no matter how cheesy his confession was. His mouth swallows your mewls as he brings you closer to the edge - but every good thing comes to an end at some point, and so do your adventures. It’s just tiring that with you, the shift always happens in the most awkward way possible.
You hear the cough before you hear the steps, and you both flinch hard enough for your head to hit Taehyung’s nose, his hand immediately shooting out of your shorts to cover his face in pain.
“Can’t you guys find a room for your escapades?” Jungkook questions with an offended look in his eyes, his hair a complete chaos as he steps closer.
You must admit, not only were your actions a moment ago shameless, but most likely downright rude as well. But in your defense…
“I thought you were sleeping. I’m sorry, Koo.”
With his lips pressed together, Taehyung watches the mood change from hot to near agony, and as you look at Jungkook pleadingly, your boyfriend moves from behind you to stand. Fingers run through his fluffy hair, and before you can think twice, he says, “I should leave. But I’ll be back on Saturday to help you with painting.”
He winks at you before he kisses your cheek gently, squeezing your hand once. Before you know it, he’s picked up his keys, nodded goodbye to Jungkook and exited the apartment - and all you’re left with is a glaring best friend who eyes you with utter disappointment that you can’t find the reason for.
You know all that was awkward, stupid even - but is he really mad about that?
“Hey, I’m-”
“What did he mean with painting? Painting what?” Jungkook asks, approaching you further until he’s hovering above you. With your eyes staring up at him, you look like an innocent kitten, and he has to muster nearly every ounce of strength inside him to not falter and grow weak for you.
“The walls. He offered to help out here and in my room,” you explain, seeing Jungkook’s expression fall with every word you utter as he takes a seat on the table. Maybe, you think suddenly, Taehyung was right about his feelings.
But then, it doesn’t seem to be just that. “You promised me we would do that together. I remember calling you and you said we would go buy the paint together and decide-”
“Jungkook, I figured you’re busy. You work all day and then sleep to compensate. I just wanted to give you a break and-”
“Don’t,” he warns, the fest of interruptions continuing between you until you fall back into your couch under his intimidating eyes. “You meet this guy and forget about me entirely. Make plans with him that originally consisted of us. And you know, Y/N…”
He licks his lips and shakes his head, laughing mockingly before he finally admits what he’s been holding in since he first met Taehyung, “I’m not hurt because you’re happy. God knows I wish you the best you can get. But what hurt was that you couldn’t even tell him one word about us living together. Almost as if you’re ashamed of me.”
You want to tell him that’s not true - complete and utter bullshit. But should you let yourself commit to this admission, then you’d have to elaborate on your real reasons for hiding him for so long as well.
Because Jungkook is perfect in your eyes.
The embodiment of a higher being, a gift that entered your life when you needed him - an utter and undoubtedly wonderful person who understands every aspect of your life and every mood you throw at him. Your relationship isn’t common - but if you told him this now, you’d admit that, until not long ago, he meant more to you than he should’ve.
“And now you’re distancing yourself from me while I try to maintain our friendship. But all you know is him.”
You’re baffled by the outburst of emotions. Jungkook isn’t usually one to be affected by feelings this much, and the fact that he genuinely seems hurt right now, shows you just how much you fucked up.
It doesn’t even seem as if he’s here to draw an apology out of you; because the moment he finishes, he stands up, indicating the end of the conversation before he vanishes into the bathroom.
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Finding out that Jungkook isn't easy to pull into your craziness when he’s angry becomes frustrating. 
The worst thing is that he doesn't ever pout at you; never accuses you of anything; doesn't dare to pull you through a guilt trip as you try to make things up to him. But sometimes, you wish he would - because on specific days, the silence tortures you more than his direct anger could.
But the anger never comes and neither does the atmosphere that you both built together. When the weekend finally rolls around and you enter his room with your hands carrying heavy paint, you find him scrolling through his phone, indulged in whatever he's seeing on his screen.
"What are you doing?" you ask, approaching him with slow steps as you try to look at his phone sneakily.
You think you catch a glimpse of some party photos on Instagram, but you soon push the unimportant discovery aside when he tells you, "Nothing much. Was going to go out with Jimin to play some pool. Why?"
Your smile falters at his words, shoulders falling as you ask, "You're going out?"
"I mean, you're busy with our walls today. So I thought I could have some fun, too."
Your initial intentions were always to bring relaxation to Jungkook, knowing fully well how much he deserves a break from work and dealing with rude customers. If his reaction is to let loose in the form of meeting up with his best friend, then you’re okay with it.
"Alright… but!" You place the colours in the corner of his room next to his closet, rubbing your hands in excitement. "We're gonna do this together. Whether you like it or not."
"Y/N, honestly. I don't need pity or anything. It's fine if Taehyung helps you out."
You notice that he doesn't even look at you while talking to you. You wonder how fine things really are then.
"Come on, I told you I'm sorry, Koo. And I'm honestly trying…" You let yourself fall on his bed, and he immediately locks his phone before finally meeting your eyes.
"And I told you we're good. You're apologising for nothing," he tells you with such finality that you contemplate whether any other word born out of guilt is even necessary. He seems to be at peace.
But then, why aren't you?
"When will you come home?" you ask him, rubbing your naked thigh at the spot where the box of paint hit you multiple times.
"I don't know."
"Do you want me to cook?"
"No." He shifts, snaking his body past you until he stands to find clothes to wear for his outing. "I'll eat something with Jimin. Don't worry about me."
You notice that there are no actions or words left to further fuel the conversation, because you realise that it's dead, anything to be addressed already said. All you can do is watch him dress, look away when you need to and listen to his soft whistle before you're suddenly alone.
With nothing left to do, you decide to call Taehyung, exhaling in relief when you find out that he's at home and free before you tell him you'd be over soon.
Even at his place, the mood seems dampened, and not even his adorable, little dog Yeontan can lift it with his gentle licks until you lean back on the bed in confusion. What you're confused about, you still don't know.
"Baby," Taehyung calls you, carrying Yeontan in his arms endearingly before cooing at him.
"Hm?"
In all honesty, trying to get over your own insecurities and bad days by consulting Taehyung seems surely unfair when all you clearly need is time to think. With all the words Jungkook assured you this afternoon, you should be at ease - but with your head spinning, you start to realise why you're not.
Figuring out why you're confused is hard - and before you can put your feelings into words properly, Taehyung asks the mind-boggling question.
"What are you thinking about?"
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When you come home, the lights are dimmed, shuffling in the living room indicating that Jungkook arrived before you did and is most likely playing his favourite shooter game with his friends. And as expected, you indeed find him sprawled out on the couch, his eyes wide open and mouth agape as he yells into his headset.
“Fuck, Jin, I told you to split! Stop glueing yourself to me, you’re close enough to kiss my ass!”
His eyes flicker to yours only for a moment and then back to the screen when you enter the room, fleeting greetings leaving him as you nod back. First, you decide to hydrate your body, your throat sore from all the yelling and heart heavy from the whole conversation you endured not even thirty minutes ago. 
Standing at the sink, you still hear Jungkook scold his friend, “If I could, I’d lock your character with all the other villains, so they can take care of you.” A short pause. And then, “No, I’m not fucking joking. You’re pissing me off so much, man.”
Something about his voice soothes the innermost parts of you despite all the profanities. Although he’s just screaming about a stupid game, you ease a little. You step into the living room, close to reaching your door when you wish him a good night in a shaky voice. Jungkook registers the tremble in your words instantly as he turns his head to take a better look at you, freeing one of his ears as worry heats up his face.
“Y/N, all good?”
Lips pressed together, you nod slowly - but even you realise soon that your answer seems faked and unbelievable to a point that even a stranger could tell that you’re lying. You hear a distant voice through the headset, now yelling back at Jungkook to fulfil his duty as a diligent army soldier of the nation whatever-the-name-is. 
But he ignores the cries for help as he asks again, “Y/N… are you okay?”
A phenomenon that most human beings are familiar with is the one of holding back until. Sometimes, it only arrives when you’re locked in your room, surrounded by silent walls; and on other times, it happens when you experience one bad thing too often or too intensely.
For you, the breaking point arrives when you look into his big eyes, so shiny and loving even in the dark of the room. And when he whispers his question with furrowed eyebrows, your until hits so hard that an uncontrolled sob escapes your mouth and causes the waterfall to overflow.
The knot in your chest returns with full power, and you watch through your blurred vision as Jungkook mutters apologies and goodbyes into the headset, ripping it off his head and standing up to reach you with two long steps.
“Oh no. Hey, look at me,” he coos as he cups your face, covering his palm with the sleeve of his shirt to wipe away your tears. “What happened?”
“No-nothing.” You shake your head, confirming yourself to be the biggest idiot as you lie to him while breaking down in the middle of the room. And while you know with a great certainty that Jungkook doesn’t believe you, you’re still thankful when he doesn’t ponder but pulls you to the couch instead.
His arms wrap around you tightly as his hand strokes your hair, and he whispers soft reassurances while you cry into his white shirt, tainting the fabric with what’s left of your light make-up.
Jungkook’s comfort is always something else. Neither your friends nor your exes were to this date able to heal a part of you just by engulfing you in their warmth; in hindsight, not even Taehyung’s arms have ever felt like they bring you the solace you so strongly desire at times.
But Jungkook doesn’t even need to work around carefully crafted words, because the way he touches you and looks at you mostly speaks volumes that sentences never can.
As you cry in his embrace, you feel like you’re actually home, entirely unrelated to the aspect of being in your physical home - but when the tears ebb down and silence overcomes you once again, you strongly feel like you owe him an explanation.
“He said he thinks he’s in love with me.”
The ache that floods Jungkook’s heart makes him flinch. While he was sure to hear this admission from you one day, he didn’t expect it to happen this soon - not while he still feels everything he feels for you and certainly not while you cry into his chest as if your world has crashed over your head.
“You should be with him then, Y/N.”
You shake your head slowly, gulping before you confess, “I didn’t say it back.”
“Hmm.” He hates himself for feeling relieved, hates that he’s basking in the comfort of knowing that Taehyung might not be what you want. “Why didn’t you?”
“Because…” you start, shrugging your shoulders as you rub the material of his shirt between your forefinger and your thumb. “I’m an idiot.”
Is that the reason, though?
“Do you… do you love him?”
That’s the question that has made you beat around the bush for two hours now, the neverending talk with Taehyung and the way home torturing you as these words played in your head in an endless loop.
“I don’t know.”
“What did he say?”
You close your eyes as you let your brain replay the evening, trying to put each memory in a chronological order as you tell him, “He asked what I was thinking about. I told him about the things that happened between you and me. He…”
“Didn’t like that you were talking about someone else?”
“Mmh, no. That’s not it,” you say, starting again as you form the sentences anew, “He comforted me to his best abilities. He saw that I was upset and told me things would be fine - said he’ll be there if I needed him. That’s the least he can do for someone he’s... in love with.”
Jungkook pulls you a little closer, one arm reaching back to grab the thin blanket he’d apparently used while you were gone. “Okay. And then?”
“I hesitated too long. Then I told him, I can't say it back with a clear consciousness yet. I mean…” You stutter slightly, shifting as the blanket covers you, the warmth so overwhelming that you shiver. “Koo, he wasn’t angry, ‘cause - he doesn’t have a reason, right? Love happens at an individual pace.”
You feel him nod, his hand still brushing over your hair soothingly as you continue, “But he was clearly disappointed. Claimed he felt terrible and all. But things sort of escalated when he asked if it’s about you.”
His fingers in your tresses stop suddenly, and he freezes under you in a heartbeat as soon as he registers what you just said. “About me?”
“He thinks you’re in love with me. And vice versa, he’s sure you occupy my thoughts too much for me to fully commit to the relationship between him and me.”
A million dollar question floats on Jungkook’s tongue as he clenches his fist and releases it, his heart picking up on pace enough that he’s sure you can feel it. And while your statement of his brain having no filter has become only partially true since you moved in, it proves to be reality at the moment. Without a second thought, he queries, “Is that true?”
And to his surprise, you don’t answer. It’s not because you know it’s true - but because you don’t entirely consider it wrong. You’re stuck somewhere in a limbo, and you don’t know what you know anymore. Decisions, feelings, friendships - everything becomes too much and every word too insufficient to fit into a proper explanation that you could deliver him.
But again, Jungkook doesn’t question your silence further. Maybe not answering is enough for him. Still, you’re not his - you’re still in the wrong man’s hug, and no matter what or for whom you feel specific emotions, you’re not his to claim.
“Don’t cry, little flower,” he says slowly, and you laugh a little, burying your face in his shirt and inhaling his scent as he massages your scalp. He chuckles with you until you’re calm against him, and when he hears your breaths steady, he speaks up again, “Can I ask you something?”
“Mhmm.”
“That poem you recited on the night of the blackout… What was the writer talking about?”
You faintly remember the words you quoted at that time to calm him down as you try to ignore that it was you who fell asleep instead. As far as you can recall, you’d settled for the last two paragraphs of The Nymph’s Reply to the Shepherd. From the research you’ve done and analysis you’ve read about the small piece throughout the last years, you can thankfully provide Jungkook with a satisfying answer.
“It’s… it’s a response to another poem. One in which the shepherd promises his love interest all the good things and assures her that he can give her the love she deserves,” you tell him, fan made powerpoints of the poem flashing into your mind. “But the nymph is skeptical about these things.”
Jungkook tries to bring the words you’d muttered back then into his head, the blurred memory slowly resurfacing before you make it easier for him and repeat them again, “But could youth last and love still breed… she thinks love and good things don’t last. Everything great you experience is fleeting, and not giving in to these things might be the healthiest approach to life.”
He was never someone to drown in literature much. Most of the time, he regards books and complicated words as sleep-inducing, not quite understanding why anyone has to read full stories and analyse strange metaphors when summaries and movie adaptations exist.
Whenever your soothingly soft voice chants such lines, however, a little feeling of heaven settles in Jungkook’s chest. He always struggles to entirely decipher the unknown emotion until he realises that it’s best to just indulge in it without questioning it.
But between your lovely tone and your warm touch, your explanation is drenched in painful and colourless hues, and he hates to grasp that he is the shepherd who keeps calling for you. The shepherd who tries to give you what you deserve; but you don’t seem to believe in whatever could bloom between you two.
“What do you think about this approach?” he asks you after a while.
You hum quietly, reiterating what you’ve written in online community chats dozens of times. “I think she’s wrong. You can still let yourself feel good, right? Things, or even happiness, might be fleeting and be replaced by sadness and dread at some point - but for the time it’s there, we should allow ourselves to enjoy it.”
“Yeah,” is all he answers. You’d chosen the poem entirely randomly, but he can’t help but admire how the content still fits subtly. Jungkook knows that he lets himself feel everything the world can offer - he is never one to decline the pleasures of the universe, freely letting his heart thump to whatever beat of a song it decides to settle on.
But while feeling is so easy, suffering is torture, and in this doomed relationship with you, all he can do is just that - suffer. Because when it comes down to facing reality, Jungkook knows he’s fallen in love with you too much.
And you haven’t fallen in love with him enough.
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Love has become such a difficult concept that you wonder how you still function. The triangle you’re caught in throws you in a gigantic loop, no matter how hard you try to smoothen its sharp edges.
You wish it was easier to hold back what has resurfaced after all this time. Anything you used to feel for Jungkook becomes so undeniably palpable now, and quite frankly - you grow to hate it. It’s too poignant and too present; and even when Taehyung apologises after your fight, understanding your point of view, you can’t shake the thoughts of Jungkook and everything that surrounds his existence.
It doesn’t take long until Taehyung’s smile starts haunting you, begins filling you with an unbearable guilt that forces you to lonesomely withdraw to your room and sip on coke until you fall asleep ultimately.
In your misery, you almost don’t notice that the man causing you this distress barely stays home anymore, showering after his work at the office before leaving the apartment again. Right! He has finally found a job that fits his degree, dumping the grocery stuff which only makes matters worse. Because now, he has even more stress on his hands; and yet, sometimes, he returns late despite his working hours on the next day - on other times, he doesn’t come back at all.
When you do start registering his absence, your mind goes berserk on yourself, despising yourself for coming up with the worst possible scenarios as you wait for him to come home, so you can ask your questions. Mostly, he responds vaguely, giving you answers that barely allow you to think of any further inquiries.
Was with Jimin.
Crashed at Jin’s.
We just drank a little and passed out at a friend’s house.
Then, one day arrives when you start to realise what Jungkook might be doing in the time you spend apart. It’s strange how you didn’t notice the crack between you widen since you told him about Taehyung’s and your fight. But tonight, you find out why.
“Shhh!” you hear on a pleasant evening in late August. Your hand spooning some chocolate chip cookie ice cream between your crossed legs halts as naughty noises fill the room along with those of the bad reality show running on the TV.
You crane your neck as you hear the door fall shut, and soon, two shadows become faintly visible in your sight, doing something that shouldn’t hurt you as much as it ultimately does.
He’s definitely kissing someone - no doubt. The subtle moans and shifting of clothes are indicative enough for your heart to drop, and you wonder how long you should wait until you can ask him what’s going on.
Or maybe, it’s best to stand up and crawl into your room slowly. Yes, this might be your best shot right now. But of course, all angels of luck abandon you immediately as always, Jungkook’s hand shooting up to the light switch to expose him pressing a girl you don’t know against the wall. His lips are attached to her neck, an image you want to burn right in this instant - but before you can look away, his gaze meets yours, face freezing at the spot as his breathing stops.
“Y/N…”
“Jungkook.”
“Jungkook,” the girl repeats after you like a parrot, her hands roaming his clothed chest before she looks at you through thick, dark eyelashes. “Who’s that?”
With furrowed eyebrows, Jungkook backs away as if the girl electrified him, clenching his hands in fists until his knuckles turn pale white. You haven’t done or said anything to him, but the tense look he gives you is full of fright.
Admittedly, you don’t like that he comes home drunk this often, hate that he seems to deliberately avoid sleep and goes to work in a daze. But right now, he has done nothing wrong - technically. Despite all of this, jealousy creeps up your body, threatening to take over your every thought, but you have not one single reason to be mad at him; and yet, his stare is more apologetic than you’ve ever seen.
“Yeona, this is…” Jungkook starts, gulping visibly as he looks between you two in a plea of help, “She’s my room-”
“Cousin!” you interrupt suddenly, flashing your teeth at her in what you hope is a friendly smile. You come closer to shake her hand, the long acrylic nails irritating you the moment they graze your palm. Her expression relaxes, but you know she’s still confused. “I’m his cousin. Just visiting the city.”
Yeona’s lips turn upwards in the next second as you observe the pink lipstick stains under her lips, and again, your stomach turns when you realise that this was most likely Jungkook’s doing. Even his mouth is tainted in the same colour slightly, and you take a deep breath as you watch Yeona shift on her spot uncomfortably.
“Maybe I should leave,” her drunk voice suggests, and when you nod, she pulls down her dress before she approaches the exit - but not without a last message with Jungkook on the receiving end. “My number is in the back pocket of your jeans.”
And with a last wink, she’s gone.
You glance at Jungkook for only two seconds before you grip your box of ice cream tightly, ready to run to your room and cry all night when his warm hand grips your arm and pulls you back.
“Y/N…”
You free yourself from his grip, taking a few steps back until your legs hit the couch. His figure leans against the wall as he waits for you to speak, and when you detect that he does, you cough.
“You’re being reckless, Jungkook,” you simply state, brushing your hair from your face as you think of better things to say.
While he fully expected for you to lash out on him, you keep your voice steady and calm - and for some weird reason, this seems to give him more confidence than your anger could at the moment. He smirks at you before he says anything, and you raise your eyebrows in confusion as you ask, “What?”
“How am I being reckless?”
“You drink all the time. Stay out of the house every day. Jungkook, how many hours of sleep do you get?” you ask as you place the box in your hand on the table, crossing your arms in front of your chest like you’re scolding him.
“Just enough?”
You sigh in frustration, shaking your head as you press your lips together. You’re not sure how much sense it even makes to confront him about this right now. He’s clearly not in the right mind to bring logical arguments to anything that you’re saying. But when he keeps rolling his eyes in annoyance, you can’t help but feel your blood boil hotly.
“Why are you like this lately?”
“How?” he retorts, shrugging in innocence and ignorance.
You motion at him with your hand in an up and down movement, still not over his deranged state as you answer, “Like this. When did you stop giving a fuck about yourself?”
“Why do you care? Why don’t you concentrate on Taehyung and yourself instead?”
You blink in irritation, the name of your still-boyfriend causing a sickening feeling in your stomach by now - but you try to remain steadfast and poised. “What does that have to do with him?”
By now, your nails are digging marks into your palm, and when you release your skin, you feel a sharp pain course through your hand. With Taehyung’s words still in your mind, you gather your strength, licking your lips before you ask, “Are you jealous of him? What’s going on in your mind, Kook?”
For a moment, he stills, the smirk falling with his head as words fail him. But then, his hazy eyes settle on yours again, the universe twinkling in them so painfully that he gives in at last. “You could do better than him, Y/N.”
“What are you talki-”
“Why do you never consider… I don’t know… us? You’ve been here for four months and it’s not like I’m being subtle with you,” he finally lets out, words tumbling out like the walls you’ve built in your brain tumble down. You know he’s right. “Why and… how did he manage to get you this easily, but you won’t even look at me?”
His eyes keep closing.
While his words are sober enough to numb you, his body suggests otherwise, and yet you can’t do more than just watch his entirely drunken state. It’s a mystery to you how his legs are still carrying him, and when you realise that he’s in no shape or form to talk about an intense topic like this right now, you shake your head.
“Jungkook, honestly…”
With his gaze lazy and tired, he looks up at you, but instead of giving in to the exhaustion and going to bed, he smirks again as he rolls his eyes and buries his hands in the pocket of his jeans. A mocking expression takes over his face, and his next words are similarly laced with a ridiculing undertone.
“Y/N, honestly. You’re just too scared to talk. You always are.”
Always? As soon as you can remember, he barely ever tried to talk about this. But then again, maybe it’s your fault too for never elaborating on his questions when he does ask. Just like the night you cried in his arms over Taehyung.
“I’m not going to talk to you like this.”
A scoff leaves his lips as he abandons his place at the wall, his wasted self approaching you slowly until he closes you in. Fingers settle on your chin as they lift your head, his half lidded eyes meeting your frustrated stare.
While you’re used to his touches, his hand on your face feels suffocating, and you’re sure he could hear your heart hammer against your ribs violently in the silence of the room if he listened closely enough. He seems to know what he’s doing to you - and maybe, if you think about your situation carefully enough, you might be able to tell him when you started to feel like this in his presence.
He looks at you intently, his voice sweet and cautious when he says, “Tell me I have no effect on you.”
As if on cue, your heart picks up on pace, the thumb that’s suddenly stroking your jaw so warm that it touches your innermost muscle as you struggle to find your breath again. The way your body trembles and goosebumps erupt on your arms is probably telling enough for him - he doesn’t need an answer when he can obviously see that he has a massive effect on you indeed.
“Jungkook, please…”
Behind his tipsy eyes, the affection he harbours for you is clear as day, the sad gaze burning into you excessively until you get lost in it. It’s not until your noses touch and he breathes against you that you realise what’s happening - because when you smell the intoxicating scent of alcohol, you suddenly back away in shock, eyes closing as disappointment settles in.
All of this is unfair towards Taehyung - your relationship isn’t like that and you’re not like that. But as you understand that you’ve started seeing too much in Jungkook and too little in Taehyung, your mind wanders into a territory that you didn’t think you’d get locked in just a month ago. When you’re not tired anymore and the mechanics in your brain are working again - that’s when you can execute the decision that is forming in your mind at the moment.
But for now, you have to knock some sense into the man in front of you, and if anger is the way to go, then you’ll gladly resort to that method. “Stop! You’re fucking drunk. I’m not doing that while you’re drunk, Jungkook.”
“You know my feelings won’t just vanish when I wake up sober, right?”
“I have a boyfriend.”
And these words seem to shut him up.
Because the only reaction he gives you to that is an irritated scoff and a shake of his head before he steps away. Jungkook knows as well as you that you won’t kiss anyone while you’re with someone else, and he’s entirely sure he wouldn’t go this far either if his brain wasn’t surrounded by a thick fog as it is now.
Feelings won’t disappear when he wakes up, but his shamelessness might.
The tension is achingly tangible when he removes his hand from your face, whispering a solid, steady and final “Being in love with you is so hard” before he nears his bedroom and leaves you standing in the middle of the living room.
The last thing you hear is the shutting of his door - and then his words finally sink in.
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When Jungkook wakes up the next morning, his head throbbing and the light too blinding, memories come flashing back the moment he sits up. Considering every idiotic decision he has ever taken in his life, his action yesterday might’ve been the worst to date.
Affection and alcohol - he should’ve known that this combination would bring nothing but misery over both of you. Now, only regret washes over him as he rethinks the choices of his words last night, grimacing as he recalls what he said to you out of sheer romantic desperation.
But then again, no one comes out of love unscathed.
An aching body forbids him to stand right away, forcing him to lay back for another hour until the pain subsides slightly. The first destination in his mind is you, wherever you are right now, but when he steps out of his room and finds that he’s alone, his hopes vanish into thin air.
You’re probably with Taehyung again, giving in to the comfort of his arms as he showers you in the love Jungkook can’t give you. But then, he detects a piece of paper on the table at the couch, candy tucked in funny wrapping holding it in place. He approaches the table with heavy eyelids, lifting the paper to bring it up to his face before he begins to read.
As a little pre-birthday-warning: I’ll be out today to get some things done. Don’t ask, because I won’t tell you - know that I’m thinking of you x
God, he’s so in love with you - the intensity is cruel, and despite being your flatmate who gets to spend the most time with you, he hates the current distance that has formed the temporary crack between you two.
Anything with you has become so hard to contain. When did you start to affect him this intensely? Considering every ex he’s ever had, he can’t recall ever feeling a yearning as strong as with you; a feeling that makes him count down moments and seconds and minutes and hours until he can see your face again. And without thinking twice, he gives in to it when he grabs his phone, leaving a text before throwing the device onto the couch again.
He only makes it to the counter that divides the kitchen and living room before a text message comes in, his legs carrying him to the furniture speedily as he unlocks his phone.
Flower 😁🌹 [12:16 pm]: i told you not to ask. can’t surprise you that way, right? ;)
The grin that appears on his features is one he hasn’t felt in ages, and the serotonin flowing through his body is enough to give him hope that he doesn’t know what to do with. But for now, he can just give in to the pleasures, no matter how fleeting they are, right?
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“You don’t understand.”
“I think I do.”
Jungkook lifts the weight in his right hand, working out the frustration he’s been feeling all day due to being apart from you - and despite the fact that he should rest more, he knows no better way to do so than to hit the gym with his best friend and complain until Jimin gets sick of him.
“No,” Jungkook says between the tired grunts, watching his friend roll his eyes in the mirror, “you don’t, man. I fucking want her.”
“JK, I know.”
With another groan, Jungkook’s bicep flexes beautifully before he places the weight on the thin mat, breathing having become heavy as he turns to Jimin. He looks at him in question, still dry as he was an hour ago while sweat glistens on Jungkook’s forehead and temples.
“What do I do?” He points at himself with a shake of his head, big eyes widening. “Honestly, I don’t know what the hell to do.”
His best friend nibbles at his plush lower lip, thinking of ways to help Jungkook win his girl over as he watches the man in question tilt his head up to the ceiling as if he’s praying. “Give her time. You know she likes you. She might dump this Taeyeon guy soon.”
“Taehyung.”
“Who cares? I stick to what I said. Just wait for a while.”
Jungkook rubs his face, the damp hair making him cringe slightly before he questions, “Okay, but what if she doesn’t?”
Jimin shrugs as he lifts the weight Jungkook put down earlier, the same grunt leaving his chest as he openly admits, “Then you’ll have to live with that.”
Jungkook takes a careful look in the mirror as he eyes the boy he once knew to be patient, careless and relaxed about anything that happened in life. All he sees now is a pathetic adult who overthinks every single aspect of his romantic life, waiting desperately for love from a girl who managed to secure his heart in an iron strong grip.
And all that a day before his birthday.
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Taehyung is wearing your favourite purple shirt today, a cozy cotton button up whose sleeves he’s rolled up in a way you love. As you sip on your tea, you wonder if he’s done that for you.
He registered that something was wrong the moment he laid his eyes on you ten minutes ago; your hug was too fleeting and your kiss missing. You aren’t even looking at him as he waits for you to speak your mind - something about your demeanor today hurts him in the best way possible, and somehow, he feels like he knows what’s coming next.
“Tae… I think we need to talk,” you tell him carefully, your chest rising and falling a little faster when you see his face drop.
“I think I know,” he remarks, a slight lopsided smile gracing his face that doesn’t quite reach his beautiful, nearly empty eyes.
Even you felt like he knew that was coming - him looking at you as you shifted in your seat constantly was proof enough that he was scared and only sitting tight until you told him what you yet have to tell.
In the bustling coffee shop, time seems to stand still as you lean forward, grabbing his large hand to wrap it around yours as you admit, “I have to let you go.”
Six words aren’t enough to make up for the ache that is to come, and although you repeated this sentence over and over again before meeting him, it seems so insufficient at the moment that you rush to continue.
“It’s unfair towards you. And I’m not like that. But I can’t hold onto this... onto you… if my mind isn’t with you entirely.”
You realise how horrible all of this sounds, can vividly imagine how much it must pain him. But his face doesn’t entirely show, the only indication of his discomfort being the clench of his jaw as he holds back his emotions.
Taehyung isn’t angry or disappointed - in reality, something about this feels freeing, nearly as if the heartbreak is worth everything if it means that he can delete thoughts of indecisiveness about your feelings. In that sense, this separation might help you both, no matter how long it might take to get used to the change.
“I promise this isn’t the same old it’s-not-you-it’s-me-song,” you tell him with a sigh, your thumb stroking the back of his hand gently, “So I won’t say it to you. But I will for sure let you know that you’re truly amazing, Tae. And you don’t deserve to feel like a second option.”
He nods in agreement, catching his lips between his teeth as he asks you in the softest tone, “Jungkook is your first option... right?”
You close your eyes as you lower your head; everything about this situation is so uncomfortable that you count the seconds until it’s over. “I- I’m sorry, Tae, I-”
“No, I swear I’m not mad. It’s fine.”
You know it’s not. But you know Taehyung is too good to admit it.
“I want you to be happy. I fell for you because I loved seeing you happy, and I tried to keep you that way. But we both know it’s not me who’ll do this effectively; and I think you’ve known for a while, too.” His voice is still steady as he gives you his point of view, and when he squeezes your hand back, you finally look up to see that his stare harbours nothing but fondness that is directed to no one but you.
“I’m so sorry, Tae.”
You feel like you’re about to cry - but then, he laughs a little, bringing your knuckles up and brushing them against his lips. “Honestly. You deserve to feel good. And if it’s with him, then I’m okay with letting you go, Y/N.”
“I hope you’ll find someone who gives you the love you should rightfully receive, Taehyung. And I can’t thank you enough for everything you’ve made me feel in this short time,” you confess, trying to somehow ease the goodbye - whether for him or yourself, you don’t know.
“Any guy in his right mind would treat you like this.”
A shaky breath escapes you when he puts some money on the table and stands, hovering above you before he leans down to press a chaste kiss on your cheek. He doesn’t leave right away; instead, he runs the back of his fingers along your cheekbone, asking you quietly, “Do you remember the story about the fairy?”
You smile at him, thinking back to your little living room post-sudoku adventure before you nod. “I do. A spoonful of heart.”
“That one,” he confirms, loving the way you lean into his touch, “I was just thinking that…”
You look up at him expectantly as he pauses, his tongue darting out to wet his lips as he concludes, “Jungkook might have been the fairy to make you feel alive in your story after all.”
And with a last, light pinch of your cheek, he bids you goodbye and buries his hands in his pocket before you find yourself alone surrounded by a crowd.
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“Jungkook?”
You hear an answer in the form of a grunt - a sound that soothes your soul instantly after the break-up you just had to endure. But after you’ve made such a big decision for yourself, it’s time to accept the changes that occur in your life and stride forward to something - or someone - you truly want to be with.
“Where are you?” you ask into the void as you take off your shoes and hang your bag onto the rack.
“Only one or two places where I can be,” he shouts back, and you follow his voice, a small box in your hand as you open the door to his room.
At the sight of you, Jungkook straightens his back, putting a book aside as he takes in your strange smile. You, on the other hand, are too surprised to see Jungkook with a book, making you entirely forget the present you’ve wrapped in pretty, earthy-toned autumn paper.
“What are you reading?” you ask, stepping closer to peek at the cover and title. “Thousand ways to escape your soul. What’s that about?”
“Just a collection of love poems. Stages of affection and all that.”
His gaze never leaves what you carry in your hand, and it only takes him a second before he recognises what these things might be for. He points silently to the flower you’re holding, and you blink a few times before you realise and sit down on his bed.
“You bought me a tiger lily?” he asks softly, taking it from you as you stretch it towards him. He brings it to his face, taking in the scent before he smiles in the sweet way he always does when he thinks you’re not watching. “You remembered?”
Of course you remembered. The moment he’d once blurted drunkenly how he loved this specific flower, you’d immediately noted in your mind that you had to surprise him with it someday. Being his birth month flower, he’s so fond of it that he tells you every now and then how he will definitely get a tattoo of it on his arm one day.
You sigh and nod before you lean in close, pressing your lips gently on his cheek and taking one of his free hands into yours as you say, “Happy Birthday, Kook.”
He looks at you almost shyly, eyes still fixed on the flower as he thanks you quietly. Despite any tension between you, he rubs your skin with his thumb softly. It isn’t until you move your head down to meet his gaze that you see the sadness in his face, the sting in your heart so prominent that you have to resist the urge to throw yourself at him.
“Jungkook,” you try, and then he lifts his face, looking at the wrapped present that you place on his lap, “open it. It’s for you.”
He gulps visibly, his hand leaving yours and placing the flower on the nightstand as he asks, “What is it?”
“Just open it.”
It’s almost as if he’s tearing the paper in slow-motion, and you grow nervous with each moment that the present doesn’t come into view. But when it does, you exhale deeply as you observe his reaction carefully.
A few seconds pass by as he throws the paper to the side, looking at every picture slowly and intently before he takes his lower lip captive. “You didn’t have…”
“Come on, don’t say it. I know I didn’t have to. Not important. Do you like it?” You shift closer, taking a look again at the collage you made of your pictures, still in awe of your own skills of finding a beautiful golden frame that seems to fit his golden personality.
“Of course I do,” he says, glancing into your face with slightly furrowed eyebrows. His eyes glint a little as he stares at you, another gulp following before he adds, “I love it.”
“Hey,” you try yet again, placing a hand on his cheek that makes him flinch slightly. You wonder… when has Jungkook become so powerless in your presence? “Let’s get some dinner somewhere and then hang out at the river.”
He hesitates. Clicks his tongue as he leans into your touch, contemplating what and how to phrase whatever is lingering in his mind. “I don’t know… I don’t really feel like it.”
You let your hand fall into your lap, watching his fingers draw forms on the glass of the frame as he takes a deep breath and admits, “I just… feel bad since that one drunk night. I shouldn’t have said what I said. Or disturbed your peace with Taehyung.”
“Well,” you start with a scoff, thinking back to the man you left behind some hours ago, “There was no real peace between him and me. And it’s nothing we should be worried about now anyway.”
Jungkook’s eyes light up the moment the words leave you, but somewhere behind the happiness, you detect worry, too. The one he always feels for you, no matter if it’s about a bedridden day or a cut on your finger.
You nod, your turn with swallowing the knot in your throat approaching as you stand up and start to back away slowly. “I mean, I was going to tell you that he and I broke up, and then I wanted to take you to dinner somewhere, but if you don’t want to-”
His legs work faster than his mind as he lifts his body in a sudden motion, making you take one more step back when he practically yells into your face, “No! Wait, what? What happened?! I’m so sorry, I didn’t kn-”
“No, no, it’s fine! You said you don’t want to go out, and you should definitely rest and pout on your birthday!” you tell him with a laugh, nearing the door until his steps have closed you in against the wooden material.
“Stop that, Y/N,” he commands, expression stern as he wraps both his hands around your wrists, “what happened? When did it happen? Why?”
You press your lips together, trying to find the shortest summary of today’s events to not elaborate on it further. Frankly, you don’t want to think about it anymore. “Just now. I told him it won’t work between us... because... I can’t possibly be in a relationship when it’s not him who holds my heart.”
The last words you utter fade into thin air, your voice growing quieter with each syllable as your body heats up. Jungkook tries his best to remain calm, but the unsteady breaths that leave him and the thumping heart are hard to ignore, relentless and nearly painful. He thinks he knows what’s happening but asks anyway.
“Who.. does?”
You’re not sure if you want to laugh or cry from the anxiety; the fact that his lips might be on yours soon throws your thoughts and mind into a dumpster fire. He’s close enough for you to hug him, but you contain yourself, look into his bambi eyes as you tell him barely audibly, “You know it.”
Silence returns for a moment and you ponder on just running away as long as you can. But then, he shifts from one leg to another, asking, “What did he say to that?”
“He… nothing much. He understands. Wants us to be happy.”
“Is that okay? Being happy together when you just broke up with him.”
That’s something that has you feeling somewhat ambiguous as well - because even if peace between Taehyung and you had long vanished, you’re unsure. But then, you remember that he pretty much gave you his blessings, and you know he’d want you to be happy - after all, that’s why you parted in the first place.
Leaving him and then not taking the opportunity feels like cheating, too.
“I think it is,” you answer eventually as your eyes drift to his fingers intertwining with yours. You don’t know why everything feels so intense with him - even when Taehyung and you started dating, the breathlessness was missing, this one feeling of bittersweet anticipation that flows through you when you’re in love; truly in love.
“Can you say it?”
You raise your eyebrows in question, blinking twice before you inquire, “Say what?”
“Say what you feel?”
You feel… relief. A new kind of ecstasy that wraps around you like a warm blanket on a late December night; affection that you want to keep inside you until your breaths give out; fleeting thoughts and everlasting promises that you want to hear over and over again. And all of this carries his name.
“I’m in love with you… Jeon Jungkook.”
His hand squeezes yours lightly, the other palm slowly coming up to cup your face as you watch his face glow in the same way as it had weeks ago. You keep thinking it; keep telling him - but his gaze inhabits every star in the world, one exploding after the other until all that floats in his eyes is stardust. Tiny, beautiful particles on a canvas of black - and you don’t think you will ever get enough of staring into the universe.
“Does that mean,” he begins, moving closer, his voice filled with so much sweetness and tenderness, “that I can kiss you now?”
The nervous laugh that escapes you is the same he’d grown so fond of when you first met, and even now, he realises how your effect on him never seems to falter. “Only if you want to.”
He chuckles with you, head shaking as his nose brushes against yours. You shrug, going for another joke, “I’m serious. Maybe you’re asking to tease me and I’ll just-”
“Shut up, Y/N,” he orders, and you go absolutely docile at his words, mouth agape as he presses you against the door. “Seriously. Just for once… shut up.”
The kiss that follows knocks all the available air out of your lungs, forcing you to tilt your head the same time he does. You inhale deeply as your hands wander to his strong bicep, relishing in the warmth of his mouth as he moves his lips slowly, affectionately. You think you feel a hint of desperation in his motions and know that he definitely is when he turns you both around and urges you backward until you fall onto his bed with a gasp.
Any body language that follows from his side from this moment on screams for less conversation and more physical contact; everything you deprived each other of for months catching up within moments.
You notice the urgency in the way he wraps his arm around your waist, placing you in the exact middle of the mattress. You know it when his lips meet your skin again, tracing the goosebumps on your neck, shoulders and clavicles. He gives you ultimate proof of his impatience as his hands roam all of you, lighting up your body wherever he touches you.
As your fingertips meet in zeal, you feel an invisible connection buzz through you like a current. Dopamine induces adrenaline that makes your heart flicker, pleasure and affection lighting up parts of your brain that have you run into overdrive.
There is not enough time to reflect on how your human body reacts to everything he does appropriately, because god - all you want to think about is the fact that he’s in love with you, and that you’re in love with him, that all that matters between you is just that; love, love, nothing else but love.
Swift hands undress you within blinks of your eyes, his shirt and jeans soon following until you’re left panting, writhing, and naked under him while he hovers above you in his underwear. His tongue leaves wet stripes along your sides, nails digging just a bit too hard into your waist; teeth nibbling, biting, marking, tickling…
“Don’t be nervous. Look at me, flower,” he whispers when he sees you clench your hands into tight fists, his chin on your tummy and his fingers opening your palms slowly as he gives you a reassuring smile. He slows down, taking you in and admiring every bare inch you’re presenting so voluntarily to the man that has occupied every waking thought in all those weeks and months.
You don’t know how or when you suddenly got here - to this fever and insanity that threw you into this labyrinth without an exit; but then again, you don’t want to escape anyway.
With time passing, love had become a sick game in your life, and whoever was tossing the dice has apparently gotten bored enough toying with your patience - because now you’re finally where you want to be. After all this time, confusion, fights and heartbreak - you’re finally here.
“Look at you,” Jungkook whispers, pulling you out of your dreaminess and self-reflection as he kisses down your stomach and thighs, “you’re so beautiful, it’s fucking ridiculous.”
He finds himself in a state of utter bliss as he opens your legs slowly to showcase your glistening core to him. A sigh leaves his lips as he takes in the image of your ready cunt, involuntarily making you hiss by breathing directly onto your wetness.
You squirm as he holds your legs steady, waiting in anticipation until you feel your heartbeat slow down. But it doesn’t remain calm for too long before you finally feel his lips wrap around your swollen clit, soft fingertips soon following until he places them at your entrance. He knows he could dip inside easily; he knows you’re already soaked enough to take whatever he gives you.
But instead, he circles your hole as he tries hard to keep you in place, careful to not get your knees into his face or anywhere else that might potentially hurt. And when he finally slides two of his digits into you, you suddenly relax as if he’s pressed down on an acupuncture nerve, your exhale so deep that he wonders if you’re still with him.
“Are you okay?” he asks as he lifts his face, watching the way your breasts rise and fall in awe. You don’t answer, and he’s close to coming up to you and shaking you awake before he sees your slight nod and hears your quiet hum.
“Y/N…”
“Yeah…”
“Do you… like that?” he wants to know as he twists, spreads and moves his fingers inside you, having you arch your back before you look down into his eyes.
You nod again, tongue licking your lips in absolute delight as you admit, “I do… but…”
“But?”
“Tongue, Koo…”
He smirks at you, igniting such an intense fire that you feel your face heat up more than it already has. His eyes never leave yours as he lowers himself again, his tongue accompanying his fingers as it makes its way up in curvy patterns. He circles your clit slowly, making you moan out louder than expected at the warm, wet sensation that runs through your nerves in waves.
Fingers still pumping in and out of you, he continues to draw forms on your sex, alternating between sucking your bud and licking the space between your nether lips. Despite being sexually active for months now, you feel yourself come undone sooner than you would’ve thought, and before you can stop yourself, you utter in a jumble, “Com-ing, I… Jungkook, don’t stop...”
You’re so unbelievably sexy as you beg for more, nearing your orgasm on his first try while he knows how hard it usually is for girls to come at all. The pride that fills his chest threatens his heart to burst, and with it flowing through his veins, he lets out a grunt against your pussy, pushing you off the edge ultimately as you come with clenched hands and a thrown-back head.
“Did you…?” he inquires as you fall back, watching the arousal drip off his fingers and onto his sheets - it might be answer enough, but he still wants to hear it from you.
“Sinfully so. Makes me want you more.”
“Tell me what more you want,” he orders as moves up to you, a clean finger booping your nose affectionately as he awaits your answer.
You hum, playfully thinking as you say, “Want you to pin me down.”
From all the words you’ve ever said to him, he never expected to someday hear this from you, looking down at you like this and fogging your brain enough. Him. Not Taehyung, not any other man, but him, your roommate, best friend, casual guy Jeon Jungkook.
“Fuck,” he voices, head shaking in disbelief, “so hot.”
His glistening lips come back to yours again, but he can only relish in the feeling for a fleeting moment before you pull away and grip his shoulders tightly. “My turn.”
You’re not sure if it’s him who falls onto the mattress by himself or if it’s your strength that turns him around, but soon, it’s your lips trailing down his body in return. You let your palms glide over the strong chest, his bicep flexing when you reach a sensitive spot on his torso and low groans leaving his mouth as you get to the hard bulge that has formed under his boxers.
Your mouth traces the imprint of his cock over the fabric, already eager for the thick muscle that awaits you, standing proud only for you. Your fingers tug at the hem for a few seconds before you pull the clothing down carefully, his cock bouncing out like a spring with a red, leaking tip.
With wide eyes, you stare at the package, standing beautifully like a tower and making you drool uncontrollably; you could guess that Jungkook’s well equipped down there, but this makes your hunger and thirst for him grow tenfold. But despite everything, you can’t contain your laughter as you see it twitch when you place your hand around it.
“What’s so funny?” Jungkook asks, looking at you in confusion and hissing as you start pumping when you see his cock deflate slightly.
“Nothing, I’m just an idiot.”
“Tell me.”
You sigh, licking a strip along his veins before you answer, “I just find dicks funny sometimes. Just hanging there.”
The crooked grin that adorns his face in the next moment leaves you gasping, his head falling back on the pillow with his sharp jawline on full display. “Just suck, baby.”
“Wow. Rude.” But whatever you remark, you can’t ignore that the nickname wets your sex anew, butterflies in your stomach fluttering wild.
But if the name ignited something unknown in you, then you weren’t ready for the sound that escapes him and throws your mind into an abyss when you slide your tongue over the tip of his head and then engulf his cock in your warm, inviting mouth. “Fuck, you’re so good at this. Like that, yes.”
First, you toy around his head, feeling more precum leak onto your wet muscle as he hums quietly and satisfied. He continues to whisper praises and curses under his breath, eyelids gradually closing and fingers coming down to tangle in your already messy hair.
You know combing through it will be hell later, but with the way his cock prods at the back of your throat when you sink deeper, doesn’t allow you to dwell on this thought further. His length throbs inside you as it begs for more, his hand tugging at your tresses to urge you to continue.
And when you start to pick up a steady pace, bobbing your head up and down while your hand moves where your lips can’t reach, he moans out, “Look at you, Y/N… so messy… fucking sexy… mine.”
You bask in his words and enjoy the fucked out state he finds himself in as you start to suck him a little faster, focusing on the pulsating veins along his shaft. Your fingers move down to cup his balls, and he seethes through gritted teeth, abs and chest hardening at your ministrations. Slight squeezes nearly push him into a frenzy, delirious words travelling from his foggy brain to his tongue as you continue to cover his cock in your drool.
“What the actual fuck,” he sibilates before his jaw clenches. With avidity that always resides in his chest when you’re around, the fist in your hair tightens before he suddenly thrusts up into your working mouth.
His movements are uncontrolled, almost harsh, and when the tip of his cock hits your throat extra hard, you gag involuntarily. Your head snaps back to catch your breath, your voice croaky as you call out his name with a cough. His eyes shoot open when he awakens from his haze, suddenly hyper aware of his previous eagerness.
“I’m sorry, baby,” he suddenly apologises as he lifts his body, leaning against the headboard promptly and pulling you up with him. You still cough a little as his hands meet your face, but you catch yourself fast, shaking your head to indicate he doesn’t need to apologise for anything at all. He still does, thumb running over your lips to collect the remaining saliva. “I’m sorry.”
The worried look on his face nearly looks like he’s apologising for more than just that - the agony sits deep, and you’re unable to decipher why until you tell yourself how wrong it is that he’s the one saying sorry. He never did anything wrong, yet faces you with this expression, feeling and shouldering guilt so unnecessarily for both of you.
“It’s okay, Kook,” you tell him, straddling him smoothly. You look into his eyes, somehow trying to amplify your sincerity to negate the guilt trip he’s sending himself into before you continue, “We’re good.”
His eyelids fall shut, breathing calming down and worries vanishing slowly as he asks quietly, “Are we really?”
“I promise,” you assure, trying so hard to convey just through the passion in your eyes that things are fine; that every fight is forgotten and every issue resolved, the world spinning around nothing but you two.
He nods after opening his eyes, brushing his thumbs over your cheekbone once more as he asks, “Condom?”
You shake your head, muttering a simple “IUD” before you grab his wet shaft from underneath, leading the head of it to your dripping pussy and sinking down only a little. Jungkook is thick - big even. You need to adjust before you risk for the slightly painful sting  to settle in.
“Oh shit…” he says, eyes squinting tight as he blows air through his o-shaped mouth, “okay.”
You wince at the same time he moans, his fingers wandering down to your ass and digging into the flesh deeply as he looks at you intently. Your eyebrows are furrowed in concentration, hands holding his shoulders to find a firm grip and mouth agape as you try to take steady breaths.
All this time living together, and yet he affects you in ways a long-time friend shouldn't; and that goes for him too. Your effect on Jungkook has his heart threatening to escape through his chest, every sight of you, every expression you throw at him so radiant, that he can’t imagine going without it a single day.
Every form he’s seen you in has been something new: the shy stranger across the couch table; the endearing literature enthusiast reciting line after poetic line; the glowing angel in front of the mirror, dressed in pretty dresses with an even prettier smile plastering her face.
And even now, you’re so goddamn mesmerising.
He leans forward to place his gentle lips on your neck, kissing in a chaste manner before he lets phantom touches of his mouth drive you crazy. When the pain gives in to pleasure and the stretch becomes bearable, your hips begin their rolling movement, rocking back and forth slowly first as you let him mark the skin of your neck and shoulder.
Everything combined, you moan into the space that carries his scent, throwing your head back as his cock glides in and out of you so easily. Jungkook lets out a frustrating sound, his voice so low and desperate when he cries out, “God, don’t moan like that or I’ll… come right away.”
You shoot a smug grin his way - one that he wants to wipe off your face immediately. And when you whisper “Shut me up then” close to his lips, he takes it as exactly the permission he needed two seconds ago. Not that you would’ve ever said no to his request.
And when your mouths interlock, tongues mingling right away, you begin to move just a little faster. But the feeling of his kiss is so intense and deep that you notice the way your movements falter - and soon, it’s him who’s thrusting up into you, your eyes squinting shut before his fingers tangle in your hair and throw your head back.
More wet kisses on your neck follow, his tongue hitting a spot seconds later that makes you giggle slightly from the tickling feeling Jungkook brings. But laughing while the man of your dreams is trying to please you is awkward, so you go for the next best option and become even more awkward as you ask, “What are you doing?”
But Jungkook isn’t one to get irritated by you fast - the only thing he does is continue his ministrations, answering in between, “Trying to be the sexy dominant guy?”
“Oooh,” you sing-song, just a single vocal draining you off your energy enough to pant as you feel him fuck into you, “yeah… go ahead then…”
His cock wet from your slick soon becomes even more restless than before, the curve of the hard muscle hitting you so perfectly and twitching whenever you let out an extra loud moan. Your mouth hangs open, your tongue wetting your lips as he bites into your neck. Small context-less pleas escape your mouth before he looks back at you, his dark gaze piercing as his pupils shake.
When you place your hands on his chest, forehead leaning against forehead and body trembling, his fingers brush the hair out of your face, thumb running over your mouth until you take it in to suck diligently.
“How is this actually happening, hell…” he says so quietly that it looks like he’s merely mouthing it, “I want to keep fucking you forever, I swear…”
“As… my boyfriend… you can for sure,” you tell him, probably too shaky, probably too soft - but he doesn’t care about the lack of your abilities to form coherent and audibly clear sentences. Because his gaze widens tenfold, lifelines running wild and movements halting for a moment.
“Repeat that… please.”
“My- my boyfrie-”
But before you can finish, he flips you over with a sudden and smooth motion until your back hits his soft mattress, his cock still residing hard and firm inside you before he lifts your legs and places them onto his shoulders.
As his cock hits home, you lose half your mind, arms raising above your head and holding onto the edge of the pillows - and as he watches your tits bounce with his eager movements, he feels his sanity slip just as much.
“Y/N, you be- you belong in a… fucking museum.” By now you can’t even tell what you’re hearing and what not - all sound is pounding and ringing in your ears.
His movements slow, cock coming out almost entirely before hammering into you again - and he watches it all; observes the way you suck him in and loves how he feels you clench around him when he groans. He tilts his head to kiss your leg, relishing in how responsive you are.
And soon, the distance feels too aching, his hands removing your legs from your shoulders and one of his arms wrapping around your torso instead as he leans down to make out with you for the umpteenth time today.
You never get enough of his taste and touch, wondering how much time has already passed and how much he has already wrecked your insides to influence your walking abilities. His free hand moves to your wrists above your head, pinning you against the bed as you previously pleaded.
You know he’s losing control - feel your blood circulation stop as he rams his cock into you and whines against your mouth, the bed shaking with the way he’s fucking you into it. You want to complain about his grip, tell him that your hands are running cold - but before you can say anything, he releases your wrists and intertwines the fingers of one of your hands.
“Beautiful,” he whispers as he kisses down your neck and collarbones, “the sounds you make for me. So pretty.” Your nipples perk up as his lips brush against them, and when he takes one of them captive, your legs wrap around his waist tighter, urging him to thrust harder, deeper, faster.
And he does - fucking you senseless, pounding and putting all his energy into you, teeth biting your nipples just slightly but enough for you to whimper and wince. Your audible desire spurs him on and he sucks harsher, smacking sounds and the vigorous feeling lewd enough for your head to spin insurgently.
When you feel his movements emanate the devotion he harbours for you so excessively, you suddenly feel romcoms start to make sense. Cheesy lines, cheesy smiles and even cheesier descriptions seem logical now, every realisation washing over you with the man’s hands on you who you’re so undoubtedly in love with.
“Touch yourself,” he commands when his lips leave your tits once before coming back again, teeth and mouth pulling and releasing your nipples until you listen. Your forefinger finds your clit in an instant, shaking from the impact of his cock ruining you thoroughly. “Pretty angel…”
He mutters more sweet words and praises, feeling his own movements falter as he watches you come undone with breathy moans and fast breaths, covering his length in the second orgasm of the afternoon.
The arm around you pulls you down on the bed, so your head stops hitting the headboard, your fingers gripping his hair as he kisses you messily, so lost in you and your affection. He holds you tightly, presses you against him, last thrusts following as he cums, too.
Endless, warm ropes shoot through you as his sounds vibrate against your lips, and his fingers in your hair and on your waist are so ruthless that even you let out a surprised yelp. It’s then that his movements drive you into oversensitivity slightly - but his moans and grunts seem to make up for all of it.
“Girlfriend,” he says once he’s empty and has left the kiss, stretching and trying the word as he pants heavily, eyes closed and face sinking in your neck. He doesn’t look at you as he calms down but still cups your face with his hand, fingers tracing your lips without glancing at them.
Without pulling out right away, his head shoots up to meet your gaze, another slow, soft kiss following that differs from your animalistic actions before in its whole entirety. His eyes roam your face and he tilts his head, unspoken worries written in his galaxy pupils that make your own concerns grow and your eyebrows raise in question.
He swallows thickly, a thought obviously weighing heavily on his mind before he mumbles, “Please, tell me if you feel uncomfortable with this, but - I should tell you that… I- I think…”
Fear creeps up your body, and you’re unsure about his next words right after the love-making you two just shared - but his stare is agonising, and all you can do is comfort him in any way, “I know. Say it, it’s - it’s okay.”
Months of pining and weeks of chasing you have affected him rigorously. If he was to count and retell the moments he feared he would lose you because of his own feelings, he would ramble for ages - he’s sure. But with everything you two have endured and fought through, it only seems fair to confess. And yet, he’s sure that you already know.
“I think... I love you.”
Thinking that he does might be the understatement of the decade - if there’s any universal truth in this whole, wide and terrible world, then it’s that he undoubtedly and without a question does just that. But if there is any chance that you don-
“And I think I love you, too,” is what you answer, however, the confession so sudden after the breakdown you had with Taehyung the night you came home after his admission. You see the surprise in Jungkook’s face; think that he might not yet but might know soon that the whole reason for your insecurity with Taehyung birthed from the affection you harboured for the man in front of you.
“You do?”
“I really fucking do,” you confess, laughing as you see his expression change and eyes widen.
An enormous grin appears on his face, relief washing over him in tsunami waves as he answers with pecks on your temple before he finally pulls out with a hiss. He hands you a few tissues quickly before he runs into the bathroom buttnaked, grabbing and bringing you a small towel, so you clean yourself up.
You snort as you watch his bare figure walk towards you, his lips pressed together in a smile as you say, “That’s for our hands.”
“So what?” he says as he throws it at you before slipping into his underwear, “Just use it.”
And with that, he disappears again, almost sprinting into the kitchen before you hear some water run into the basin. Busy with cleaning yourself and the washing-machine-ripe sheets, you notice too late when he comes in with a purple-tinted glass of water. And when you do, you coo in adoration as he puts the tiger lily in the glass carefully, neatly finding a spot for it on the nightstand before he places the framed picture right beside it.
With a pressing urgency, he takes out his favourite thin, blue blanket out of the closet, unfolding it before he joins you on the bed and covers you both. His arm pulls you close, lips kissing your hair softly until he smiles at you, wordlessly gazing into the depths of your eyes without ever drifting away.
“Why are you staring at me like that?” you ask him with a giggle, your fingers running over his chiseled chest in soothing motions.
“Can’t believe just yet that you’re real.”
You raise an eyebrow, looking at him carefully again before you remark, “The prettiest man alive is saying that to me?”
Jungkook laughs at your words, arms leaving your body for a moment as he reaches out to grab the frame behind him, telling you with a groan, “Well- it wasn’t me who Mr-I-can-seduce-your-woman-and-your-man stole you from.”
You give him a pout that he doesn’t see, too lost in the pictures you decided to include in the collage. He holds it up for both of you, pointing at a photo from months ago in which your face is covered in flour - his doing, of course.
“We were baking muffins that day. As a movie night snack,” he tells you, still remembering that it was a Matrix kind of evening. You both had gotten drunk enough to try the dodging-the-bullets-trick yourself, your back consequently hitting the floor and Jungkook having to massage it later as best as he could.
“Can’t believe we didn’t understand how whipped we were for each other.” You point at your smiles on various pictures, the small gazes you both are throwing at each other on every still taking over your heart. “Look at this. It was so obvious.”
Jungkook’s smile widens more and more with each word and glance at the pictures, and you don’t know what overcomes him in the next moment when he suddenly places the frame back to its previous spot and throws himself over you again. He leaves little pecks all over your face, grinning in between as you begin to giggle. Soft fingertips trace your sides until they grab your waist, and then he halts, nose brushing your cheek.
“When you fell asleep at the night of the blackout, you were whispering my name,” he tells you, mouth moving and hovering above yours as his eyes fall shut.
You think back to the night for what feels like the thousandth time, but no such memory comes up - you can’t even remember if it was him you’d dreamed of. “Really?”
“Yeah. I was dozing off, but then I heard my name,” he explains further, stealing a kiss from you before he drops onto his side again. With both your heads placed on the pillow sideways, you watch his tired eyes close here and there. “I don’t know why you were saying it, but it took so much fear from my chest. I was looking at you for a minute or so until I realised that there are worse things to be afraid of than the dark.”
You’re the one with an intense love for poetry. You know words whispered by poets and bards, know them by heart with them engraved in your mind. And still it’s Jungkook you’re in awe of - because the way he twists and crafts his words reaches a core inside you that you didn’t know existed.
“Worse things?” you ask, brushing the hair strands out of his eyes as you watch him nod.
“Like… having to find my new personal flower I can share my rent with.”
You roll your eyes playfully, pinching his arm slightly and making him hiss before you fall into his hug again. Your gaze falls onto the glass filled with water and the tiger lily for a split second before you realise how the simple flower symbolises a new month and new start for you, autumn leaves falling slowly the same way the tension in your heart does.
With Jungkook, you’re ready to experience all the seasons and everything that comes with them - the changes in your apartment, changes in your relationship, changes in the world and all the other changes in between.
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i’ll smooch anyone who can deliver roomie jk to me :] <3
for those who made it to the end and actually read the whole thing - thank you so so much !! if you liked the fic, please leave a like, a reblog & let me know what you think by sending an ask !! feedback is always super appreciated & valuable <3
or you can just chat with me about the story & characters if you’d like !! :)
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chateautae · 23 days ago
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maybe i do | kth. XIII
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➵ summary : maybe you love each other, maybe you don’t. when a deal between your fathers leaves you forcefully wedding kim taehyung, arguably seoul’s most powerful CEO, you’re prepared for a loveless marriage of eternal regret and unhappiness. but maybe, it doesn’t turn out that way after all.
↳  part of the high-class series!
➵ pairing : taehyung x reader
➵ genre : arranged marriage!au, ceo!tae, s2l!au, eventual smut, fluff, angst
➵ rating : 18+
➵ word count : 37k
➵ warnings : swearing, alcohol consumption, ANGST!!, depictions of physical confrontation, violence and injury (none are extreme), depictions of depression, anxiety and despair (please read with caution if this is triggering to you), mentions of online, in-person hate, insulting language and death threats (not extreme nor explicitly detailed), hard dom!tae, spitting, manhandling, pussy slapping, spanking, degradation but praising?, heavy petting, pain kink, brief pussy eating, choking, hair-pulling, angry sex, rough sex, brief male oral, so much cum play, cum tasting, top drop scene, breast fondling, nipple play, biting, loads of pussy fondling, love-making, slow but passionate sex, honestly this chapter is kinda painful but i promise it has a happy ending <3
➵ a/n :  OOF SHE’S ARRIVED!! gosh this chapter really kicked my ass and made me overthink it’s content and i even tried a different writing style so i kept doubting it, it’s been a long journey~ i’m so sad thinking the next chapter will be the last, but these babies really had a great run, please enjoy this mess as usual 💓 thank you to my lovely wife and beta-reader @hantaev​ as always 🥺 and feedback means the world to me <3
➵ playlist : ilysb (stripped) by lany, pillowtalk by zayn
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chapter thirteen : “i had already reached the shore”
prev. ↞ || ↠ next || masterlist
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“What the fuck are you doing to her?!”
The next punch Taehyung lands is so harsh, Hisung nearly tumbles back at the mighty force. He’s winded and disoriented, and the blood trailing from his nose is a telltale sign that Taehyung must have broken it.
The sheer amount of violence in such a small frame of time rattles your bones, afraid for Taehyung’s safety as you jut out for him, but you’re immediately stopped by some of Taehyung’s personnel. The particularly tall, leaner one you’ve come to know as Seojoon holds you back, all while trembling panic spreads across your chest.
“Mrs. Kim, you can’t go!”
“I don’t care, that’s my husband!” 
You fearfully watch as Taehyung dodges a hit from Hisung and nabs him by his collar, only pulling him closer to sock another punch that bloodies Taehyung’s knuckles. Hisung falters, and Taehyung’s voice roars the second he gains enough time. 
“Seojoon, take the rest and get Y/N out of here!” But you immediately scream your protests, fear bubbling in your stomach the second you see drops of crimson blood on his once spotless suit. 
“No! I’m not leaving you Tae!” 
“What the fuck did I say? Get her out of here!” 
But as Taehyung is turned around and instructing orders, Hisung’s already regained himself enough to hurtle at Taehyung. He takes the compromising hit, and nearly tramples to the ground as your worry sky rockets, Hisung grasping him in his grip.
“Taehyung!” You scream, you scream and you scream his name because it’s the only thing you know, because your fear is so overwhelming, though the terrifying possibility of Taehyung getting hurt is what overrides your system. “Taehyung! Let me go, please. Let me go and stop them, somebody stop them!” 
Taehyung escapes the hold, having shoved Hisung off far enough they’re both leveled again, Taehyung huffing and puffing with anger as Hisung tastes the blood in his mouth, spitting some out. 
“Seems those anger issues haven’t changed, have they, Taehyungie?” 
“What the fuck do you want?” Taehyung spits pure venom, fury festering into an infection that taints his entire headspace. “What the fuck were you doing to her?” 
“Nothing much,” Hisung shrugs, having the audacity to laugh as crimson blood paints his teeth. “Though I gotta say, you’ve got yourself a feisty girl.. Feels good when she puts up a fight.” 
Taehyung’s entire sense of logic snaps, lunging forward with a hand that holds Hisung steady and the other swinging a direct hit. Hisung eats it, but also earns the chance to grab Taehyung’s wrist and tug him forcefully forward, unbalancing him and Hisung’s own shocking fist lands a punch. 
You watch with horror, kicking and shouting at the few men around you to say something, do something as you uselessly fight for your freedom. 
“No! Stop it, don’t hurt him!” 
You beg and you plead, the wound on Taehyung’s cheek ripping your heart out of your chest, pushing and shoving at Seojoon to stop moving you and fucking let you go. 
Taehyung rapidly floods with even more anger, and you don’t recognize this person anymore. There’s rage there you’ve never once seen before, a bull with no sight but his target in front, and your chest only swarms with more trepidation. “Taehyung, please, come back! Just stop!” 
But he swiftly ignores you and violently shoves Hisung back, letting him wind up for another hit but Taehyung ducks and grabs hold of his shoulders, driving a knee into his gut that doubles over his victim. Taehyung stares down at the man with pure rage, ordering once again to you and guards that standby with such a stable, terrifying tone, it’s almost scarier than when he yells. 
“Get my wife out of here, or I don’t spare a fucking soul.” 
Taehyung’s guards immediately falter with fear, snapping each other alarming looks as Seojoon uses more force to pull you back, rounding the car with you as you profusely fight. 
“No, no! I’m not leaving him.. I’m not leaving him, Taehyung!” 
You struggle and fight, your strength barely enough to combat any of their force, but your adrenaline, your sheer worry for Taehyung drives you forward. You watch as Hisung resupplies himself air, injured and coughing as he addresses Taehyung above. 
“You’re really this bent up over a girl, Taehyungie? Last time I saw you this angry was when your family busted your little Picasso scheme.” Something ticks inside Taehyung, and he immediately grabs Hisung by his arm. He shoves him up against the nearest concrete wall, contorting the limb in a way it definitely shouldn’t be against his back.
“What the fuck did you do to her, huh? Spit it out before I snap your arm in two.” 
“Didn’t do much of anything, to be honest. We just had a lil’ chat,” Hisung actually acquires the boldness to be obnoxiously cocky, flitting his sight over to you as he sends a little wave. “Didn’t we, Mrs. Kim?”
Taehyung rapidly slams Hisung against the cement wall, bending his arm so violently he’s seconds from dislocating his shoulder. “Tell me what the fuck you told her, you jackass. Why’d you go after her?!” 
Hisung spits more blood to the side, chuckling as though this was amusing to him. “Everyone knows, you fucking asshole. Your marriage.. we know that shit’s not real.” 
Taehyung’s brows pinch together, confused as all hell. “What the fuck?” 
“You don’t remember, Taehyungie? Shit, nice to know you’re still dumb as fuck.” 
Taehyung neglects mercy and this time turns Hisung around, lunging a hand towards his throat and choking him against the wall without a sliver of patience, the volume of his voice rattling. “Tell me!” 
“I found the dirt...” Hisung struggles to speak, grabbing at Taehyung’s wrist but it’s no use. “I know about the deal.. I know why you married her.. and everyone else knows too.” 
Taehyung’s eyes soften with shock, realization dawning all over his features before he wakes himself out of it, anger draping him over once again. “You’re fucking pathetic, you know that? What does any of this have to do with her? Why’d you involve her?!” 
“Because I knew it’d hurt you the most, fucking idiot.”
Taehyung increases the power of his grip, so blinded by rage he can’t see anymore, can’t even hear the way you scream and cry for him to stop. 
“Taehyung, stop this, Just stop! He’s not worth it!” 
But in all that chaos, Hisung manages to kick Taehyung off balance and weakens his chokehold, earning the chance to tackle Taehyung to the ground.
He lands on the pavement, trying to regain himself but Hisung doesn’t waste a second. He uses his advantage to brutally kick Taehyung, who attempts to block the hit but unfortunately takes it. You immediately let out a terrified shrill, fighting profusely. “No! Stop it, stop!” 
“You’re calling me pathetic? You’re the one that needed to fucking fake a marriage!” 
“Get the fuck off me, you didn’t need to involve her! You were never supposed to go near her!” 
Now your panic has reached its limit, watching as Taehyung loses strength and Hisung drives his foot into his ribs so harshly, he lets out a pained grunt. 
“You really think nobody was gonna find out your little marriage was a scam? That you’ve got yourself a little fucking gold digger?” 
Taehyung practically sneers back as he swings his own foot to violently kick his knee in. “Leave her out of this, what do you want from me!”
You finally fight just enough to break out of the guard’s hold, your once heavy feet bolting across the pavement as you watch Hisung draw back for another hit. 
“You’ll never understand!” You hear him yell, but just as he’s about to kick Taehyung yet again, you immediately join him on the ground and protect his body. You shield him in a reckless instant, fearful eyes flashing to Hisung as you beg him with everything you have. 
“Stop it, stop! Stop hurting him!” 
Hisung halts, panting profusely as Taehyung immediately props himself on an arm and hugs your body with the other, clutching you worriedly. 
“Princess, stop, it’s okay-” 
“No, no! Just stop it,” You cry, angry eyes flashing to Hisung. “Don’t fucking touch him!” 
Hisung stares at your entangled bodies still enraged. His eyes locked with Taehyung’s that are blanketed with crimson anger, threatening the man. 
“Hurt her… and I won’t let you live.” 
Hisung registers the seriousness in Taehyung’s voice, letting up as he retracts his leg. You can feel Taehyung vibrating with anger underneath you, but the sight of blood staining his once impeccable suit, replaying the images of him being kicked and his split knuckles, it all comes crashing down on you. You shake profusely as you sob into Taehyung’s chest, so worried for his well-being, so scared and afraid of everything that’s transpired, it’s your only meek response. 
Taehyung’s body is buzzing with adrenaline, his hands are numb and his torso aches like a bitch, knowing damn well Hisung must’ve left bruises on him. But sadly enough, it’s not any of those things that hurt Taehyung,  it’s rather the devastating sound of you crying on top of him, hugging him so tightly while shaking terribly that alarms him. 
Taehyung realizes this was a waste of his time, a useless fight that only caused so much more damage, and has only left you possibly suffering from a panic attack. Taehyung props off the ground and sits up entirely, wrapping both his arms around you and squeezing you comfortingly, attempting to hush your cries. 
“Shh, Princess. It’s okay.. shh.” 
“Why… why’d you do that..” You cry and you cry, your tears staining his clothes. Each second that passes by Taehyung hears your sobs, his heart tears itself into measly pieces, feeling nothing but guilt that he didn’t think of you, and only acted so impulsively. 
“I’m sorry, angel.. I’m so sorry.” 
But you’re too overwhelmed, tears escaping your eyes as you hyperventilate, and Taehyung can only hug you tighter, feeling tears prick his own and praying you won’t have a full-blown attack, let alone have him be the cause of one. 
Hisung watches the ordeal with mixed, indistinguishable emotions, but before he can even speak, Taehyung’s guards immediately snatch up his arms, restraining him. He protests and fights, catching Taehyung’s attention as his empty, distraught eyes meet him. 
“You have no idea..” Taehyung’s voice shakes with anger, “what you just did.” He’s done with playing these games now, and Taehyung’s formidable look alone tells anyone he’s not kidding in the slightest.
Hisung’s attempting to elbow someone when he spits. “That was the point, jackass.” 
“It’s not just about me, motherfucker.” Taehyung’s eyes flit down to you spilling tears on his chest, body dangerously convulsing as you clutch him like he’s your only lifeline, and his heart shatters into more agonizing pieces. “It’s her, too… you don’t understand..” Taehyung loses the strength to speak.
“You don’t understand what’ll happen to her.” 
“Does it look like I give a shit?” Hisung argues. “She’s a gold-digger, wake the fuck up, Kim. She only wants your money just like every other broad that ever wants us.” 
“There’s no us,” Taehyung maintains his anger, using every ounce of his self-control to not let it craze him. He puffs angrily, anguished, pained eyes meeting his once best friend, who he once called his brother. 
“Why her... why’d you have to hurt her?” Taehyung almost let tears escape his eyes, the urgent situation now dawning on him. Everyone knew, everyone knew you were simply an add-on to a business deal, that he never loved you when he first met you, that everything you had in the beginning was a lie, everything was fake, and his family must be quaking in their boots right now. 
And God, he can’t imagine what’ll happen to you. 
“You could’ve done anything.. fucking anything else to me,” Taehyung implores with agony, his voice breaking. “My company, my family, my fucking money...  anything but her.” 
“This is what you deserve for tormenting me for years. Making me live in your shadow like some second-rate choice.” Hisung makes an effort to fight off Taehyung's guards, though only loses the battle as police and authorities make their way to the scene. “And now she gets the consequence of that, this is your fault.” 
Taehyung’s tired now, worn out and debilitated, he can’t even look the bastard in the face without feeling an angry acid bubble in his chest. He shakes his head with a dry scoff. “Get him the fuck out of my face, I never want to see him again.” 
And with that, Taehyung watches as Hisung’s protests are shut down by his personnel. The only upsetting thing he has left to do is stroke your hair as he holds you, all while police sirens blare in the background, and your sad tears fall against Taehyung’s chest.
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It’s been fifteen minutes, and you haven’t uttered a word to Taehyung. 
For fifteen minutes, he watched you search for the nursing kit in your bathroom, seated him on your bed, knelt down before him and swabbed alcohol over his split knuckles, cleaning his wounds precariously. All while tears silently cascaded down your cheeks, and you attempted to sniffle them away. 
His heart repeatedly kept breaking into millions of pieces, this excruciating pain constricting his chest, begging you from the inside to talk to him, to tell him something, say something. 
“Princess.. please say something.” 
“No, don’t call me princess right now.” Taehyung’s heart sinks into his stomach as he endures the sting of your words, watching you intake a deep breath as you focus on the scabs forming over his beat-up knuckles. 
“Baby, please.. talk to me.” 
“There’s nothing to say.” You curtly respond, your heart clenching every time your mind flashes with images of the fight, Taehyung’s red hot anger and the hits he took, his ripped knuckles already evoking your tears. 
“Please tell me, baby,” he implores for what could’ve been the fifth time. “What did he say to you?”
“Nothing.” 
“I know it’s not nothing, Y/N. Please tell me something.” 
You only respond with silence, taking gauze bandage and securing it around his injuries as he tries again. “What did he say to you, Jagiya?” 
You sniffle, more tears spilling from your eyes as you revisit the cruel things Hisung spat at you. “Everything I already know.” 
Taehyung’s chest cinches, the pain he can feel right now is agonizing, smothering his heart as he worries for you. He gulps, voice wavering when he asks, “did he touch you?” 
He juts out his hand to cradle your cheek, but you immediately avoid his touch, composing the foreignness that taints your body right now, as if you could still feel Hisung on you. 
Taehyung’s expression falls once he sees that, and falters once he understands what may have happened. 
You attempt to swallow back tears, believing you could be strong right now, that you can emotionally handle seeing two people fight and that your husband ultimately did what was right, yet, your heart shakes in your chest. Your body feels unsettled, scared as the images keep flashing in your mind. You cry harder, small sobs escaping your throat as you try to wipe your tears away, but your vision only becomes blurier. 
Taehyung’s lungs fill with agony, tears filling his own vision. “Baby..” 
“Why’d you do that, Taehyung? Why?” 
He knits his brows together as if to challenge how that’s a question, answering pressingly. “Y/N, I saw him so close to you.. so close to touching you and I couldn’t.. I didn’t see anything clearly at all, okay?” He detailed desperately. “I don’t know what it was.. but it was like.. I knew something was wrong. I could hear you calling for me.. I knew you needed me.” 
“That’s not an excuse, Taehyung.” 
“An excuse?” Taehyung exasperates. “Princess, he was touching you.. touching my wife and I’ll be fucking damned if I kept letting him do so.” 
“But Tae.. look at you.” You weep as you finish with the bandaging around his hand, and you call attention to his exposed torso, his white dress shirt stained with blood hanging open against his body, and you see the painful bruises that bloomed across his abs and ribs. “You didn’t deserve this.. you didn’t deserve this at all.. it’s my fault. It’s my fault you got hurt.” 
Sobs escape you as you fit your crying eyes into your hands, Taehyung merely subjected to watching you. His chest is pierced through with a knife, the pain too unbearable.  “Oh baby.. this isn’t your fault. This isn’t your fault at all.” 
Taehyung immediately secures his hands underneath your arms and pulls you up, embracing you with all his warmth no matter the pain he feels doing so. You fall into his neck, weeping senselessly and without pause. Taehyung feels your body shake, and it takes every ounce of his being to not entirely break into two. 
“Baby, please.. please stop crying.” Taehyung pleads as his voice weakens, clutching you desperately. “It breaks my fucking heart.” 
You sniffle as you attempt to collect yourself, finding the fickle strength to say something. “I’m sorry.. I should’ve.. I should’ve been stronger.. I should’ve fought him off better-” 
“No, no. Don’t say that to me.” Taehyung squeezes you tighter, hand snug in your hair as yours remain tucked in between your squished bodies. “You did so well. Y/N. I’m proud of you, I’m so proud of how strong you were, baby.” 
“I was such a coward, Taehyung. I should’ve done more, I’m so sorry.” 
“Y/N, please, I beg of you..” You swear you could hear Taehyung sniffling as moisture floods his eyes, throat closing up as he speaks brokenly. “Please stop saying sorry. You were so strong.. my baby’s so strong.” 
The room fills with your crying as you release everything, the fear, the anxiety, the sheer trepidation filling your bones considering everything the bastard spewed out. You and Taehyung were in danger you couldn’t even measure yet, filling you with anxiety. 
“This is only my fault, Princess.” Taehyung declares. “I fought him because I was so angry, I was so scared for your safety I couldn’t even see anymore.” His palm finds the back of your head, stroking your hair gently. 
“You know you mean everything to me, right? I had to protect you.. I’ll do anything for you, I don’t care what happens to me.” Taehyung desperately implores, hugging your shaking figure tighter to hopefully quell the amount in which you quiver. 
You finally find some sort of calm within yourself, settling down as you lose the strength to cry anymore. You lift off his neck, your bloodshot, mascara-ridden eyes falling to Taehyung as you sniffle away your sorrow, hand combing through his hair. “Thank you, Taehyung. You didn’t have to.. I can’t-I can’t say thank you enough.” 
Taehyung’s teary eyes smile, as though it was funny you had to thank him for something so simple. 
“Of course, my Princess.” He laughs a little with liquid pooling his lashes, running a hand through your hair as you lean your cheek into his touch in the most gentle of ways. He brings his nose before yours, and lightly nudges you before finding your forehead, thumb stroking your cheek. “Anything for you.” 
You sit comfortably in his lap, being mindful of putting pressure on his wounds as you simply breathe through the quiet moment, soaking in his loving, warming presence. 
“I should be saying thank you to you.” Taehyung suddenly muses. “You threw yourself over me and protected me. You stopped the fight without a second thought and I..” He stops, needing to collect his emotions as he breaks away and merely searches your eyes, an eternity of love confessions swimming in them. “I don’t think I’ve ever loved anyone else this much my entire life.” 
You smile, as if to say how could he be thanking you for such a simple thing. “Of course, Taehyung.” You whisper against his lips quietly, fingers weaved through the hair on the nape of his neck. 
“Anything for you.” 
His lips curve into a small smile, closing the space between you two. There’s a cut in his lip, but you don’t mind it at all, sealing your lips together for tender kisses. You break away to peck a small kiss to the cut, feeling an ache when you see the wounds on his cheek and lip, but he never reveals any of his pain. 
“What are we going to do.. Tae?” You ask him, a gentle thumb soothing his bruised cheek. “Everyone knows.. and your father-” 
“I know, he wants to see us tomorrow.” Taehyung swallows nervously. Taehyung’s father had called him on the way home, your husband leaving out the details of what he said, though the raised volume of his dad’s tone on the other end told you it was nothing good. 
He’s summoned you both to his study tomorrow morning, fear crawling up your stomach once you evaluate what this may have truly caused. You already know how strict Taehyung’s family reputation is, and immense guilt burrows into your heart once you consider you may have jeopardized the stable, steady relationship he’d spent years building up again. 
“What will we do.. I’m scared.” 
“Don’t be, sweetheart.” Taehyung calms you as he pulls you in for an embrace, injured hand caressing your hair. “Whatever we do, we’ll do it together.” 
Taehyung turns and kisses your hair deeply, taking his time in stroking your strands, feeling your body shake less. You pull away from him, sniffling away the last of your tears as you flit over his wounds, agony filling your chest again. 
You kiss the cut and bruise on his cheek, then kiss his cut lip delicately. Next, you disconnect his hands from your body, bringing them before your lips and kissing his ripped knuckles as softly you can, hoping it could lessen his pain. 
Your thumbs graze over the bandages you wrapped, pensively soothing them as you nibble on your lip, mind a mess of thoughts. 
“I love you no matter what, you know that?” Your peer up at Taehyung as you confess, heart aching as you hold his gaze. 
Taehyung pouts a little, almost sad. He removes his hands from yours and cups your cheeks, pulling you in for a kiss before he winds his arms around you, your head falling against his shoulder. 
“I love you more, Princess.” He rocks your entangled bodies softly, cradling you like a baby. His baby. And even if your mind still weighs heavy with Hisung’s insults, you know in your heart how much Taehyung feels for you, because his tight, warm hug alone speaks a million, reassuring words
“You know I do, and always will.” 
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Taehyung squeezes your hand as you stand before his father’s dark, elm wood doors, restless in your spot. Your eyes flicker towards his, and Taehyung sees the small sight of fear, his irises softening 
“We’ll be fine, Princess. I promise.” Taehyung reassures and takes a deep breath for you, replicating it as you exhale carefully. 
“I’ll always protect you, remember?” You nod to him as he affirms with another squeeze. 
“I’ll protect you, too.” You echo him with a smaller voice, and he cracks a smile before painting on a composed expression, pushing open the grand door. 
This study is familiar to you, and yet it feels nerve-wracking to step aside, your eyes finding more people than just Taehyung’s father. You find his mother seated on a couch with your father across from her, not to mention your mother is also here. 
More than six months ago, you sat here with these same people, and even though you felt nervous then, nothing compared to the fear that sank into your bones this very instant. Your mother is here now, and you immediately swallow as anxiety bubbles in your chest.
 It was funny how the last time you’d step foot inside, you dreaded meeting a complete stranger and entering what you had believed to be a loveless marriage, dooming your life for all of eternity. 
And now, that same stranger you were introduced to squeezes your hand supportively as he steps in front of you protectively, not having noticed you cowered a little behind Taehyung’s frame at the sight of so many distraught eyes.
Taehyung’s the one who speaks up after clearing his throat, his voice powerful and confident. “Father.” 
His father doesn’t even spare him a look, seated in his chair behind his desk as he examines a shelf of his. “Come in.” Is all he says, and the sheer intensity of his tone alone calls for anyone in the room to submit to him. 
Now you know where Taehyung gets it from. 
You and Taehyung step inside further, showing your faces to all the occupants. It felt as though you and Taehyung were children being severely scolded by adults, which ironically was the situation at play when Taehyung’s father spoke, timbre aloof and cold. 
“Do you know why you’re both here?” 
You squeezed Taehyung’s hand, honest fear flooding you simply hearing the controlled anger in his father’s voice. You know Taehyung and his family already have a past of being in situations like this, and you were afraid of such events repeating once again. Not to mention destroying their current relationship. God knows how much suffering and hard work Taehyung had to endure restoring their bond, noticing full well it wasn’t entirely fixed. 
It never slipped past your attention that Taehyung always addressed his dad as ‘father’. 
“We’re quite knowledgeable, father.” 
“And do you have anything to say for yourself?” 
Taehyung swallows, tightening his jaw as he composedly speaks. “We’re aware of the news that’s gotten out, and I apologize deeply for it.”
“We, Taehyung.” You interject, correcting him with a hushed tone. “We sincerely apologize, Mr. Kim.” 
“Apologize..” Taehyung’s father actually laughs here, a dry, condescending sound. His eyes then dart to the two of you, and you also now see where Taehyung gets his intimidating stare from. 
“Do you think apologizing is going to fix this?” 
“I-” 
“No, son. You have no way of defending this,” his father’s voice roared in the room, the grand size causing an echo effect that worsened his rigid tone. “You had one job, Taehyung, one job. And that was to ensure nobody got wind of what the marriage was hiding.” 
Taehyung furrows his brows with offence. “My job was to also take care of my wife. I’m very confused as to why there’s so much hostility in this room.” 
“Because you and Y/N-ie should’ve been more careful, Taehyung-ah.” Your father’s the one who speaks this time, his tone not angry, though instead sounds disappointed. 
“What do you mean we should’ve been more careful, Mr. Min?” 
“It means we gave you two everything with this marriage, and yet this is how we’re repaid?” Taehyung’s mother also speaks with something akin to sadness, sorrow, as though her heart honestly aches.
“Father, you must know I never saw this coming.” Taehyung presents his case. “This was all Hisung’s doing, you know he has a vendetta against me.” 
“And you couldn’t counter it? Calculate the attack? How many times have I told you to always stay aware of malicious people wanting to harm Kim Enterprises? How many times have I told you to be a smarter CEO?!” 
Mr. Kim’s voice resonates in the room with an angry shrill, twitching as the sound rattles you. Taehyung shields your body as he squeezes your hand, requesting firmly. “Father, please don’t yell. You’re scaring Y/N.” 
“Ah, of course. Suddenly she matters more than what I have to say.” 
“Jae-in..” Taehyung’s mother tuts Mr. Kim, to which your father also interjects. 
“Mr. Kim, you know I’ve apologized on Y/N’s behalf-” 
“And I won’t accept it. My son should’ve been paying attention to his company and working hard to ensure its future success, yet there he was uselessly vacationing around with your daughter.” 
“Excuse me?” Taehyung cut in. “I was at the annual tech convention, father. That was work.” 
“And yet I see you on the cover of every tabloid lollygagging around and partying as though you hold no reputation? Jeopardizing the Kim family name for a girl you barely know?” 
“She’s not just some girl I barely know, father!” Taehyung suddenly raises his voice, capturing everyone’s attention. “You don’t know anything, alright? We’re genuinely in love.” 
Taehyung’s father scoffs, ticking his head to the side derisively. “Love. I told you to get married and have a wife, son. Not to waste your time with what you believe to be love.” 
“I am in love with her, father, and you don’t get to speak above my feelings anymore.” Taehyung immediately dismisses his father, to which he raises an audacious brow at his son’s attitude. Your husband turns to your father, pulling you forward encouragingly as you come out of hiding from behind him, letting Taehyung encircle an arm around you. 
“Mr. Min, I’m not lying when I say this.” Taehyung states with sincerity. “I apologize for any bad press, media or trouble at all I may have caused your daughter and your family. I mean it when I say my feelings for her are real, and I’ll do anything in my power to protect her.” 
“Is my presence being seen in this room at all, or am I a ghost?” Your mother finally has the audacity to speak, making you clench your hand in Taehyung’s, and he responds with his own squeeze. 
“Why aren’t you speaking, Y/N? Is your husband suddenly your representative?” She spits venom your way. “Stop troubling the Kim’s more than you already have.” 
“What do you mean I’ve troubled the Kim's, mother?” You question her. “This was because of Han Hisung, he did this.” 
Your mother laughs, the kind where it’s derisive and sarcastic. “Y/N, have you always been this intellectually-challenged?” 
You grow offended immediately, stepping forward to counter her but it’s rather Taehyung speaking up. “Mrs. Min. I understand this is our first time meeting, but with all due respect, don’t speak to my wife like that.” 
The room’s taken aback with surprise, your stunned mother attempting to stutter a remark. “What-what an insolent boy.” 
“Kim Taehyung, you watch your mouth.” His father threatens with a scold. 
“Son, you know that’s not how you speak to your elders.” His mother reminds him. 
“Then where’s your respect, huh?” Taehyung asks the room angrily. “Nobody has the right to speak to Y/N like that when none of this is even her fault, it’s mine.” 
“You truly believe none of this has to do with her?” Taehyung’s father queries with rage, and all you can do is remain silent with fear, the way he doesn’t even address you by your name, meaning he’s extremely upset with you. 
“It doesn’t. What did she even do that’s making you treat her like this?” Taehyung counters. 
Mr. Kim then rises from his seat, rapidly pulling out a drawer from his desk and accessing an unnamed portfolio. You watch him toss the folder over his desk and it lands flat against the coffee table, an abundance of photos suddenly spilling out. 
You feel bile instantaneously crawl up your stomach, Taehyung’s eyes widening as he mindlessly speaks. 
“That’s…” 
“Explain this then, son.”
The entire room is privy to images taken of the moment Alex confessed to you outside your work building, the angles and shots in which the photos are captured having caught every piercing detail of the interaction. You can see the way Alex looks at you, the way he holds your arm, your wrist, your face as he pleadingly confessed his feelings for you. 
And it all looks like incriminating evidence. 
“Do you even know how Han Hisung found any of this out? It was these photos. Apparently the media’s been keeping them due to our deal with the press but the Han’s offered them more money, and now the photos are being used to discredit your marriage.” Taehyung’s father explained through a locked jaw and angry eyes, Taehyung wetting his lips with frustration. 
“Son, what is this? Do you not understand how terrible this looks on your father? Our family? You?” Taehyung’s mother softly explained. 
“Y/N-ie, how could you do this to the Kim’s? I trusted you to be forthcoming and honest, to do a good job with this marriage and this is how it turns out? After all that I tried to do for you?” Your father upsettingly details as you fill with overbearing, sickening anxiety. 
“D-dad, you know I’d never…” Your voice wavers, attempting to quell your racing heart as you speak, and Taehyung detects it, rubbing your back soothingly. “I’d never do something like that, dad. It wasn’t me at all, a co-worker was just speaking to me and he got a little too intimate. I was denying and pushing him away but he never listened to me.” 
“Do you think the media cares for any of that? Do you not understand how they’re now twisting my son’s name and our family in the papers because of you?” 
“Father, you can’t blame this on Y/N,” Taehyung argues as he shelters your figure, palm squeezing your arm supportively as you attempt to control your turbulent emotions. “Her co-worker approached her and confessed his feelings, she had none for him and was simply denying him. What I chose to do after they spoke was of my own volition.” 
“Really? This has nothing to do with her? Just like what happened to your face?” 
You and Taehyung collectively gulped at that, your husband faintly touching his cheek wound in a failed attempt to hide it. “It’s-it’s nothing.” 
“Nothing?” His father yelled. “Look at your face, son! I know it’s the result of fighting the Hans' son over her, that girl is no good for you!” 
“I chose to fight him because I was angry, father, stop blaming everything on her!” 
“Namhyun, look.” Taehyung’s father then directed his attention to your father, eyes a crimson red of anger as he wagged a finger. “I gave your daughter and you a chance knowing her reputation, knowing that she was the runaway heiress and I truly believed her befitting of my son. I do not appreciate this being how your ignorant daughter repays me for my kindness.” 
“Jae-in,” Your father rises from his seat with a disappointed sigh. “I apologize, I deeply apologize for my daughter’s actions and her affairs with your son. I’m truly sorry for the trouble I caused your family.” 
“Dad!” You shouted at him, disbelief flooding your system as he allows Mr. Kim to speak to him like that, to speak about you like that. It was as though all those times your father had similarly bowed his head and allowed powerful people to step all over him flash through your mind, horrifying you. “How could you?!” 
“Y/N-ie, we’re not in a position to be arguing. The Kim’s provided us with a lot we should be grateful for, and I’m very disappointed in you for throwing that away.” 
“Please, Namhyun. You should know by now all your ungrateful daughter does is destroy anything she touches.” Tears pool your eyes now, not even at your mother’s insults or her hurtful way of speaking, but your father telling you he’s disappointed in you. 
He’s never said that to you your entire life. “Dad..” 
“Kim Taehyung, our discussion isn’t finished, either.” Taehyung’s father speaks up. “You had no right to fight that boy and make matters worse. Do you not understand that the Han’s can file a lawsuit against you? They can press charges and send you to prison?” 
Taehyung grimaces as he musters the capacity to deal with this bullshit. “And I don’t care, father. Hisung was physically harassing Y/N, my wife and if you truly believe it wasn’t right of me to hurt him in that case, then I will never be your son again.” 
Taehyung’s father pulls back the ends of his suit as his eyes blanket over with fury. “And you believe breaking his nose and nearly his arm was the answer? All because you’re supposedly in love with this girl?!” 
“I am in love with her! I’ll do anything for her!” 
“I told you to find balance, Taehyung,” his father composedly says, trying to reach his son. “Balance, to be able to keep both sides of your life equal. I told you to stop focusing too much on work, not shift it all onto another side. I told you to find balance with your life!” 
“She is my life now, father, don’t you get it?!” Taehyung shouts so loudly in the room, you almost quiver too. Everyone’s suddenly shocked by your husband’s outburst, falling silent as he continues. 
“Look, I-I understand the photos are damning and they look suspicious. But I promise you, I acted the way I did because I was jealous and concerned.. because I’m in love with Y/N and I didn’t want just any man touching her without her permission.” Taehyung explains, running through his thoughts as he expresses them as eloquently as he can. 
“And we fought about it already, okay? We fought and we exchanged terrible words but it led us to confessing that we’re in love with each other, truly in love.” Taehyung wets his lips as he squeezes your hand, pleading eyes flitting down to you, irises swirling with nothing but endeared love. 
“This isn’t her fault, and I won’t stand for anyone insulting or rudely regarding my wife.” Taehyung’s tenacious eyes look at your pairs of parents, speaking earnestly. “I’ll do anything, give anything to protect her. I know my feelings may not matter much right now, because the situation is dire and I understand that. But the one thing I want to make clear is that I love her, and I will not let anyone speak ill of her.” 
Taehyung specifically flashes a look to your mother, and the hushed silence that befalls the room after Taehyung’s confession invokes your own. 
“It’s true, Mr. Kim.” You choke up, tears pooling your lash line as they threaten to spill. “I wouldn’t do anything to hurt your son, or you or your family. I didn’t do anything with that co-worker of mine, and Han Hisung approached me himself and.. and he said and did awful things.” You shake as you recall the memory, blinking tears away but they only roll down your cheeks, Taehyung worriedly squeezing you tighter.
Then, to everyone’s surprise, you let go of Taehyung’s hands to fit your knees to the ground, leaning over and bowing your head to offer Mr. and Mrs. Kim the sincerest of apologies. Taehyung’s eyes nearly fall out of his sockets, kneeling beside you as his hands worriedly shake your shoulders. 
“Y/N, stop! Lift yourself up, please lift your head!” 
But you ignore him, knowing that deep down, and truthfully, this was all your fault. Maybe if you were more assertive with Alex, maybe if you didn’t freeze up and kicked Hisung in the balls as self-defence to run away, maybe this all would’ve never happened at all. 
Mr. Kim is right, you ruined their reputation, you ruined Taehyung and his image, even after the plentiful times you vowed to never do such a thing. 
But most of all, your mother was right, you truly do destroy everything you touch. 
“I’m sorry, Mr. and Mrs. Kim. I didn’t mean to tarnish your name or your son’s, I didn’t mean to cause him and your family all this trouble.” You weep as you barely speak stably, sniffling between your words. You neglect to hear Taehyung’s pleas to lift your head, that you don’t have to do this and none of this was your fault. 
Because ultimately, it was. 
“I’m ignorant for having taken the compassion you showed me, the opportunity you gave me by offering your son’s hand in marriage, for allowing me to stand next to him and be his wife for granted. I’m deeply sorry I’ve only caused him difficulties, and I know I’m undeserving of your son..” You couldn’t even complete a sentence, Taehyung profusely begging you to stop as he cradles your shoulders. 
“Y/N, stop.. please, please don’t say this!” 
“Y/N-ie..” You can hear the sadness in your father’s voice, knowing this must be shattering his heart, and it only wilts your own considering you always cause him so much trouble. 
“I promise I will try to fix this, to show you I truly, truly do care about your son. That I love him more than my own life, that I’ll do anything for him.” You were sobbing now, everything boiling over to the point in which you couldn’t bear it anymore, couldn’t fathom the situation. 
Taehyung’s voice breaking is what lifts your head, turning to him to find his eyes glassy and pained, shaking his head profusely. 
“Princess.. take it back. Take it all back, please. It’s not true, none of that is true.”
You couldn’t handle the tears in his eyes, though you had to say this for his family, to own up to your useless worth, to acknowledge that you were born to only taint everything you touch with nothing but misfortune and ruination. 
Taehyung’s father takes a deep sigh as he watches the entire scene unfold, finding the smallest sliver of mercy as he absorbs your apology. It’s funny he’s not the one that speaks though, rather your mother.
“What a disrespectful girl. You apologize to the Kim’s but offer no apologies for your father and I?” She spits. “Do you not understand how much the Min family name was tarnished in those papers too?” 
“Seyun-” 
“No, Namhyun.” Your mother shuts your father down. “I have grown tired of you letting your precious daughter get away with things. She is to be held responsible for this, for everything she’s ruined after how hard you worked!” 
The wad of agony in your throat only multiples, sitting on the floor on your knees as your breathing dwindles out. 
“How could you have not been more careful, Y/N? Did I not tell you you’re lucky Kim Taehyung even put a ring on your finger? When will you begin to understand your place and worth?” Your mother’s words only felt like daggers to the heart, festering your pain into an irreparable wound that stung incredibly deep. 
“Your brother Yoongi’s having issues in America now, your father has to deal with the company’s image. My name’s being thrown around in these papers and now you’re dragging the Kim’s into this? When will you understand your selfish actions have consequences? When will you learn to appreciate everything you’ve been granted despite ruining it all?!” 
You can’t take it anymore, you can’t. Your chest is losing air and your stomach churns with sickness. Your lungs constrict, your heart hammers dangerously in your chest and you can’t see, can’t feel anything but raw agony, sheer panic flooding your bloodstream. Acid bubbles up your throat and you immediately feel sick, beginning to heave and hyperventilate.
Taehyung’s entire body leaps into panic mode, rapidly clutching your arms as his concerned voice calls you. “Y/N.. Y/N!” 
“Ah, would you look at that, now she’s having one of her attacks.” Your mother chides with folded arms and an unbothered eyebrow raise, your father cutting in. 
“Seyun, that is our daughter!”  
“Your daughter, not mine!”
Your head’s spinning, the room’s too bright and all you can hear is panic blaring in your ears, telling you to run, to hide, to just get away.
“I can’t.. I can’t do this..” Is all you say, feeling stomach bile crawl up your esophagus and you bolt out of Mr. Kim’s study, scrambling to get yourself outside as you clutch your hand over your mouth. 
“Y/N!” Is all you hear faintly in the background, the familiar timbre of Taehyung’s voice calling you but you don’t hear it at all, running and running and running until you reach the front door, prying it open to quickly lead yourself outside. 
Your knees buckle the second you start sprinting, passing by the opulent water fountain the Kim’s had in their front yard. You run to the left side somewhere, falling against the cobblestone ground and throwing up whatever contents filled your stomach into the grass. 
You cough and wheeze as tears spill from you, the disgusting taste of bile in your throat as your hair obstructs your path. You empty out your stomach again, hyperventilating and sobbing as your tears fall into the impeccable lawn, almost a reminder of how you truly do ruin anything you touch. 
Suddenly another pair of hands wrap around your hair and casts it away, soothing your back as they kneel down beside you. 
“What are you doing? Go away.” You rasp with a cough.
“I'll never leave you, Princess.” 
You feel sick again, the nauseous feeling returning as you throw up an additional time, Taehyung encouragingly comforting you through soft back strokes. You blubber as tears escape you, the pain in your chest excruciating, the ache in your heart insufferable. 
You didn’t even realize your body was shaking until Taehyung winds his arm around your shoulders and squeezes you. He hushes you, cooing gently. “Shh, baby. You’re fine, you’re okay.” 
Your lungs fill with misery, your eyes flood with tears and everything spills out of you into desperate words. “I can’t.. Tae.. I can’t.” 
Your breathing is awful, you feel like your lungs are on fire and the world’s worst migraine plagues your head, begging through sobs for any mercy. “Taehyung.. it hurts.. it hurts so much. It’s so painful.” 
Taehyung’s eyes give out now, sniffling as he watches you in such terrible pain, and yet he can’t do a single thing. “I know, baby, I know.” 
Taehyung pulls out a small cloth from his suit, pressing it to your lips to clean you until you take it yourself, using it to dry some of your tears and runny nose. 
“I’m so sorry, Taehyung. I’m so, so sorry.” You sniffle senselessly, figure shaking uncontrollably in his arms. “I’m such a terrible person.. I’m so sorry, baby.” 
“Don’t say that. It’s not true at all, Princess.”  
You could only feel your chest horribly tightening, heart thudding rapidly as you double over in pain and tears, the amount of agony, sheer torture shrouds your insides unbearably. 
“I can’t do this.. Taehyung, I can’t.” You weep like a child. “I’m so fucking useless, I’m not worth a single fucking thing. All I ever do is ruin everything, I ruined everything.” 
“Y/N..” Taehyung desperately calls, pulling you into his embrace in an instant and hugging you to his chest, hand brushing your hair delicately. 
“It’s all my fault. I’m so fucking stupid.” You sobbed through your words. “I should’ve pushed Alex away, why wasn’t I thinking? You were right, you were right this whole time..” You remembered your fight over Alex suddenly, revisiting his words. “I should’ve understood the repercussions. I’m sorry I didn’t. I’m-” Your breathing destabilizes again, the panic, the pain so agonizing you couldn’t find air, physically heaving for more.
“God, Y/N, please breathe. Just breathe, baby. Look at me,” Taehyung softly takes your cheeks and beckons you to look at him, meeting his gaze. He demonstrates deep breaths and you follow him, broken sobs escaping your lips. 
“Remember what we talked about when this happens? What does a pencil do, baby?” Taehyung redirects the conversation. The discussion had surfaced when Taehyung inquired you seriously about your anxiety, and specifically wanted to know how to defuse your more severe panic attacks. You’d instructed him that the best option is to focus on one, simple thing that’s completely different from the attack, deterring the victim from their anxiety-inducing thoughts; like a distraction. 
“It.. it draws.” You stutter, hiccuping as your body hyperventilates, your head pounding. 
“It draws, that’s perfect. You draw, don’t you?” 
“Yeah..” You nod slowly, sniveling like a child. 
“What do you draw, baby? Tell me about it.” 
You swallow as you muster the strength to speak, intaking bouts of air as your body quivers, tears staining your face. “I-I draw.. buildings.”
“You do, don’t you? You draw these gorgeous, gorgeous buildings. And sometimes you draw for fun, right?” Taehyung questions softly, thumbs stroking your cheeks. 
You nod, wiping your eyes. 
Taehyung chuckles gently, recalling a memory. “I remember when I walked in on you trying to draw me once, you hid it so quickly.” 
You breathe the smallest of laughs as you remember, lips falling into something opposite of a frown and Taehyung’s face lights up. 
“Ah, there’s her pretty smile.” 
You laugh again, hands hooking onto his wrists as your eyes find his, sniffling as you inhale another deep breath. “I’m.. I’m still sorry, Taehyung. I-I really did make everything worse.” 
“Shh, let’s not talk about that anymore.” Taehyung hushes you considerately, pulling you into a tight hug as his chin rests atop your head. “You’re all that matters to me right now.” 
Your eyes give away hearing him, another round of tears escaping them. You’re just so moved, so touched by his comfort it’s your only reponse, your only reaction. 
What did you ever do to deserve Taehyung? You have no clue. 
“It doesn’t matter to me what the world thinks of us right now, okay? You’re all that matters, Princess. Your health and safety are my number one priorities.” Taehyung cradles you tightly, his deep timbre, the vibration of his voice soothing. 
He gives you a few more strokes to your hair, feeling for the way your breaths stabilize and level a bit before he’s breaking away, eyes scanning your features as he tucks some hair behind your ear. His eyes speak a million words when he looks at you these days, a stark contrast to months prior when you met him for the first time, and all they ever revealed was mystery. 
“Do you feel better?” 
You let out a shaky breath, feeling your head pound less, finding some peace in your chest even though despair runs rampant within. “A-a little.” 
“Does it still hurt? Do you still feel anxious?”  Taehyung’s thumbs smooth the apples of your cheeks, lightly shaking your head as you attempt to collect yourself. 
Taehyung feels peace at that, lacing his fingers with yours as he stands to his feet. “Let’s stand, Princess” 
He gently tugs you up with him, meeting his stance as you dust yourself off while tears still blur your vision. Taehyung also fixes you up, swiping his thumb underneath your eyes to clean your mascara and setting your hair. 
He removes the tears from your face and presses a kiss to your forehead, long and deep. Your gaze fixates on him, still feeling your breaths clip, but he returns you an angelic smile that feels hopeful. 
Your world’s interrupted by your father approaching you two, your attention along with Taehyung’s shifting as he instinctively shields you in his arms.
“Taehyung-ah, your father wants to speak to you.” He informs, a hand in his pocket as he stands quite restlessly. Taehyung supplies a simple nod, though doesn’t leave right away as he watches you intently. 
You swallow as you peer at your father, feeling too vulnerable to face him and you cower into your husband, hiding your body in his as Taehyung embraces you gently. 
“Y/N-ie..” He begins, sighing. “I’m.. I’m sorry, okay?” You absorb his words though they don’t do much for your pounding heart, shrinking into Taehyung’s hold.
“Don’t worry about the Min family affairs, alright? I’ll handle it all, same with your mother.” You twitch at the mention of her, not giving your father an answer as you instead turn your cheek on him, resting against Taehyung as you clutch his chest. 
You feel your husband’s arms shelter you, a hand caressing your back. 
You hear your father sigh, his shoes sounding against the ground as he makes his way back, though stops before swiveling around. 
“Taehyung-ah.. son.” You feel Taehyung’s head shift in his direction. 
“I know I don’t have to say this, but take care of my daughter, please.” 
Taehyung sends your father an understanding nod, pursing his lips with a miniscule smile. “Of course, Mr. Min. Anything for her.” 
Your father nods back, returning to the Kim house as Taehyung leads you to his Mercedes, opening the door for you. 
“Stay inside for me, okay? I’ll be right back. I don’t want you in that house by yourself.” Taehyung instructs gently as he seats you, suddenly his fingertips meeting his charm that decorates your neck. 
“If you start to feel an attack again, hold my necklace and think of me, okay? And if you feel like it’s too much to be alone, call me right away, promise?” 
You intake a deep breath as you hold it together, mustering the courage to be left alone because you know you’re strong, you know you can do this. 
“Promise.” Taehyung’s lips curve gently, and he presses his lips to the tip of your nose before he lets you settle inside the car, shutting the door and locking the Mercedes for your safety. 
You hope his talk with his father goes well.
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Taehyung slams the door of the Mercedes shut before locking the car, not having spoken a single word to you as he sped you two home. You were too rattled to really ask him anything, knowing that certain scowl on his face indicated he’s been pushed to his limits. 
And for a patient man like Taehyung, that’s seriously alarming. 
You vacate the car as well, Taehyung unlocking your front door and holding it open for you to walk in, shutting it behind himself as he enters. He abandons his shoes like useless objects, stalking into the main area with a hand on his hip and the other massaging frustratingly at his forehead. 
He paces as he thinks, anger evident on his features. You hesitate saying something, merely standing with your arms crossed as you contemplate what to do. 
With a shaky voice, you finally address him. “Taehyung..” 
“He’s so fucking..” Is all he mutters, scoffing as he stands still and taps his foot. He tongues his cheek as he no doubt feels rage eat him from the inside. 
“Baby..” 
Taehyung doesn’t hear you, or if he does, he ignores you. He leans himself over the back of a couch, puffing out a frustrated breath as he attempts to control himself. He can’t think straight, can’t see straight and he uses every ounce of his being to not break everything in this fucking house. 
“Baby.. talk to me.” You say in that sweet voice of yours, and Taehyung’s head ticks as he squeezes his eyes shut. 
“I can’t.. I fucking can’t.” 
“What do you mean, Tae?” 
“I can’t.. I won’t let my anger out on you.” Taehyung profusely shakes his head, gripping the couch in almost a deadly hold and you soften at his words. 
“You can tell me anything, Taehyung.” 
“No.. not again. I’m done unloading all my crap onto you.” Taehyung counters, and it makes your heart sad he thinks he’s burdening you. 
“But.. I’m your wife, Taehyung. We’re in this together.”  
“I can’t..” Taehyung whispers, having avoided eye contact this entire time as he attempts to pull himself together. “I can’t let my anger control me anymore.” 
Before Taehyung could even think further, he felt your hand press to his broad back, soothing him as you peek at his distraught expression. “Taehyung, baby, look at me.” 
With great hesitation, Taehyung meets your eyes, finding his jaw locked and sheer fury flaring in his irises. You know you’ve been in this situation before, where Taehyung’s anger is getting the best of him, and so you bring your hand to his cheek, eyes conveying comfort and support. 
“You have me,” you say, recalling an old, old saying between you two. “In whatever way, you have me.. Tae. You know that, right?” 
Taehyung swallows, his fingers boring into the couch’s back as you continue. “It’s not healthy to bottle everything up.. the way you’re feeling.” You explain softly. “You have me, and whatever you say will never be a burden. Do what you need to do. Let that anger out, my love. Talk to me.” 
Taehyung’s eyes flicker away from you. He doesn’t say a word, his eyes blanketed with a dark cloud of nothing. You feel for him, your heart aching that he’s subduing his emotions to make sure you’re okay, and you implore with your heart as your hand combs through his hair. 
“Taehyung.. please.” You beg. “Do something.. anything.” 
Taehyung remains unmoving, as though he’s going to leave you hanging again. Just as you begin a sentence, however, Taehyung snatches up your wrist and drags you to the nearest wall. He suddenly cages you against it and your back hits the cold paint, gasping. 
This scene is familiar to you, Taehyung’s hot breath fanning your skin as his hands rest either side of your head, his anger boiling. Except this time, his lips are mere centimeters before yours, so, so proximal his plushy petals brushed dangerously against yours. 
“Taehyung…” 
“I need to fuck you senseless.” 
Your guts immediately twist with arousal, squirmy as his deep, husky tone leaves your panties suddenly dampening. 
“Tae..” 
“I need you in whatever way I want..” He confesses, his breaths hot and heavy. “I can’t.. I can’t let it out in any other way.” 
Your heart thuds in your chest, tasting his hot breath as he refrains from kissing you, his lips just right there but holding himself back from touching you. 
“But I don’t have your consent, and I won’t-” 
“Use me, Taehyung.” 
Taehyung lifts his head and meets your gaze, shocked. “Baby..” 
“Use me, Tae. It’s okay..” You cup his cheeks then, pressing your forehead to his, knowing you’re rationally making this decision, that this is what you want. “It’s okay.” 
“Princess.. I told you to never force yourself-” 
“No, no..” You deny him, feeling his palm curl around your wrist. “I want this.. I hate that you’re feeling like this.. please.” You implore him, and Taehyung swallows as he exhales a shaky breath. 
He just barely nods, composing himself as he collects the courage to do this. He wets his lips against you before he slowly, but surely takes a step back. In a single moment, his aura completely transforms. He looked at you with a gaze so dark, you were sure his pupils were far from dilated. 
“Raise your hands.” 
The authority in his voice submits you immediately, crossing your wrists and lifting them above your head. You don’t know what he’ll do, but before you could even question him, Taehyung suddenly steps forward and pins your hands against the wall above you, invading all your space. His body presses against yours as he towers over your figure, sucking in a breath. His mouth hovers above your lips, nearly kissing you, but never granting the opportunity. 
You jut forward for his lips but he denies you, his energy palpable, intoxicating as his proximity permeates through you. 
“I’m gonna be a little rough, do you understand that?” 
You nod with a gulp, comprehending that Taehyung’s serious with that baritone voice of his, but you know you want this with your whole heart. 
“Repeat your safe word.” 
“R-red.” 
“Say it clearer, and don’t stutter.” 
His authoritative command makes your pussy gush, squishing your thighs together as you answer him. “Red.” 
Taehyung’s eyes flit down to you squirming, a light smirk painting his lips. “Does this fucking turn you on?” 
You bite your lip to contain a shudder, his sudden heated energy making you far more than just horny.  His dark persona, his onyx eyes, his goddamn broad body caging you against the wall doing you in. 
Taehyung tightens his grip on your wrists, leaning forward to brush your ear with his lips and a dark growl.
“I asked you a question.” 
“It does,” you swallow, feeling his hot breath tickle your ear, his voice downright sinful. “It does.. Taehyung.” 
He releases a small puff of air as though in satisfaction, relishing in his lips lightly traversing your ear before Taehyung pulls away. You attempt to peer at him though Taehyung doesn’t spare you a look, suddenly grabbing your wrist and tugging you forward, leaning down to grab your leg with his free arm and you're thrown over his shoulder. You panic in the slightest, his strength surprising you as he walks his way to your staircase. You don’t speak, however, knowing he’s not a fan of speaking unless you’re asked. 
Taehyung throws you on the bed, body springing back on the mattress as you prop yourself up on your hands. Your puppy eyes look at his onyx ones but they don't do much of anything to him. 
Taehyung has officially let the beast inside him loose. 
He immediately drapes over your body and crashes his lips onto yours, hands either side of your head burying into the sheets. The sheer power of his kiss surprises you, letting out noises of humming and pleasure against him and he doesn’t let up.
Your hands move to wind around his neck, but Taehyung denies you as he rips your hands off and forces them back on the bed, squeezing them down harshly. The roughness makes you moan into his mouth, Taehyung only drawing away to catch his breath. You watch as he blinks and his eyes finally reveal your husband to you again, his breath running rampant as he swallows. 
He doesn’t need to say a word for you to understand. He feels guilty, you can see it in the way his irises glisten. It feels selfish doing this, using you for his pleasure because you know just how selfless Taehyung is. How much he’ll prioritize your needs over his. The reason why he can never be a hard dom alone stems from his need to do the most for others, to think of them before he thinks of himself. 
But this time, you wanted him to be selfish. You didn’t care anymore, Taehyung deserved a chance to let it all out, to set himself free of every negative emotion that weighs down his chest. The pressure must be hitting him so hard right now, he has an entire company to contemplate the future of, his reputation as a CEO and his unreasonable family that’s placing the blame on him. 
He’s carrying the world on his shoulders, and no matter how strong you knew he was, everyone meets a breaking point. 
You cup his cheeks, glossy eyes soft and kind as they peer at him, nodding as you speak. “It’s okay, Tae, it’s okay.” You assure him. “Use me, baby. I’m yours.. it’s okay.” You watch his eyes plead, warning you that he doesn’t want to hurt you. 
“I trust you, baby. Use me.. use me..” You tell him gently, and Taehyung nods again as he swallows nervously, squeezing his eyes shut to control his raging emotions. He opens them to reveal a different colour, Taehyung wasting no time in colliding his lips with yours desperately, and fuck, does he kiss you hard.
He devours you, tongue invading your mouth plentifully and you groan as you taste him. Taehyung breaks away, grabbing your chin and forcing you to look at him, his index finger and thumb squishing your lips into a pout.
“Open your mouth.” 
Your pussy flares up at the sound of his deep voice, letting your lips fall open. Taehyung collects saliva in his mouth before spitting it into yours. It feels erotic when his spit hits your tongue, letting a noise escape as Taehyung’s eyes darken. 
“Swallow.” 
You close your mouth and do as you’re told, licking your bottom lip after you’re done. You feel Taehyung shift his weight into his elbows as he lays atop, holding up your chin while hovering above. 
Taehyung darts his tongue out to lick your lips, dragging his tongue over them in slow stripes. It leaves you sloppy and wet but his tongue pries your mouth open for more, kissing you hard and messily. 
“Wanna fuck this face full of cum,” he suddenly confesses with a growl, gripping your face in place as he shoves his tongue down your throat. “Watch you swallow it like a good cumslut.”
The name is new, and it left your guts twisting with pleasure, squirmy underneath him. Taehyung immediately takes a hand and smacks your pussy through your clothes, harshly and with force. You gasp quickly, surprised eyes meeting his. 
“Did I say you could move?” 
You shake your head, laying yourself more still as his authoritative voice submits you.
“Good, now don’t move.” 
Taehyung’s hands then immediately rip your clothes off your body, quite literally. He tears open your blouse within seconds, breaking some buttons as he throws away the useless thing. He unbuttons and tugs your pants and panties down in one swift motion, unclipping your bra as your tits fall out. 
You sigh out a moan, left completely naked underneath a clothed Taehyung. He engulfs you back in a kiss, roughly swallowing up your mouth and tongue as much as he can, as hungirly as he can. His movements are so unhinged, hands fitting around your waist and holding you in place as he kisses you like an animal, starved and ravenous. 
His teeth come out to play, biting and nipping your plushy lips before popping off your wet mouth. “Fuck.. I want you,” he breathes harshly, returning for more kisses in between. “Want you so fucking badly.”
“Then have me, Tae..” You whisper against his lips. “I’m all yours.” 
Your words only rev Taehyung’s engine, returning so much harsher this time, your lungs fill with his passion and desire. Your hands make way for his neck, attempting to grapple into his hair but Taehyung snatches up your wrists and slams them back on the bed, making a noise he swallows. 
“Who said you could touch me?” 
Your cunt floods with arousal, curling up your toes as a little moan escapes the back of your throat. “I-I want to touch you.” 
“Did I say you could?” 
The deep timbre of his voice and dark colour of his eyes are too intimidating to deny, not even daring to be a brat or disobey him. He was a beast now, and you would allow whatever he needed to satiate his hunger. 
You shake your head, nibbling on your lip as Taehyung dips down to your ear, breath tickling your shell. “What did I teach you about words, sweetheart?” 
The baritone sound of him ripples through your ear canal and travels into your gut, hitting you where it hurts. You shiver, his large hands already wrapped around your wrists above causing sparks to fly around in your belly. 
“No, Taehyung.” You breathe, chest falling and rising. “You didn’t say I could touch you.” 
“Good girl,” Taehyung coos, lifting himself to meet your innocent eyes with wild ones. “Now, you’re gonna listen to me, right?” 
You nod as you reply. “Yes.” 
“You’re gonna be my good girl?” 
You bite on your lip as you respond, “yes.” 
“Such a good girl” Taehyung praises as he kisses your nose, before he lets out a sudden growl that shakes up your core. 
“Get on all fours.” 
Taehyung removes his touch as he stands by the edge of the bed, watching you intently as he makes towards his belt and begins unbuckling, unlooping the leather material as he raises a brow at you, as if urging you to move. 
You forget that you haven’t. Taehyung just looks so irresistibly sexy, your cunt pools with arousal faster than you can breathe. He’s wearing an Armani suit that hugs his masculine curves and broad body delectably, and God does the image of Taehyung unbuckling his belt light a lusty fire inside you. 
He’s tonguing his cheek as he uncuffs his sleeves and rolls them up, just about ready to destroy you into little pieces as he stares you down. He unclasps some buttons at the top of his shirt, loosening up his tie. He tugs it down and watches you still, not having moved yet. 
It’s so goddamn hard. You didn’t know being a hard dom could look so sexy on him, that draw of his brows, his tongue poking at his cheek and shit, did his carnal eyes scream the millions of dirty things and seventy positions he wants to put you in. 
“Did I not give you an order?” 
You immediately snap out of your daze, stuttering as you attempt to find your voice. “I-” 
Taehyung scoffs, finishing with his sleeve and pulling a smirk as he peers off to the side.
“Bend over.” 
You sputter like a daft idiot, clamouring as a response. “Tae-” 
“I said bend over.” 
You gulp, following his instruction and crawling over the bed. You situate yourself over the sheets and let your breasts press into the mattress, holding out your naked ass in his direction. Taehyung licks his lips as if he’s eyeing up his meal, and you shiver when his warm palm curls around your waist. He strokes you almost condescendingly as his free hand falls to an ass cheek, bending down so that his voice is mere centimeters from your ear. 
“You didn’t listen when I told you to do something,” his husky voice spills into your ear, and you intake a shaky breath as it invades your insides. You bite your lip as your chin presses into the mattress, something about this position and knowing he’s clothed behind you squirming your legs. 
Taehyung seems to detect it too, his hand traveling down to your core and moving your flesh back to catch a better view of your already dripping, glistening pussy folds pulsing. 
“This turns you on, huh?” He’s amused, oh, he’s so fucking amused. His voice drips with lust and a fiery, hot flame, knowing Taehyung’s going to have the fun he honestly, rightfully deserves. 
“You’re a little whore for when I’m rough, aren’t you?” Taehyung growls, hand suddenly cupping your wet sex and you buckle forward, gasping into the sheets. “Want me to spank you fucking pink?” 
“Yes, Mr. Kim.” Your whimpering voice comes out weak, and Taehyung can’t help but grow hard himself watching you fuck back into his hand, grinding for some sort of relief. He grants you the wish and begins rubbing at your warm cunt, fingers grappled onto your hip as he pleases you from behind. 
You mewl as a result, the rub of his metal rings and the sudden attention to your most sensitive area causes your clit to pulse rapidly. 
You’re just too fucking horny right now, and you’re not exactly sure why. Maybe it’s the comfort you feel being with Taehyung, having always felt safe, sound, protected in intimate moments like this. Or maybe it was your husband handling you like his personal ragdoll, a wish you’ve had ever since you witnessed his large, veiny hands. 
In all your thinking, Taehyung suddenly lands a hand on your pussy, slapping you hard as the sound echoes in the room and you buck forward, gasping loudly. “Taehyung!” 
“Why the fuck can’t I hear you? Did I tell you to be quiet?” 
You fill with arousal, chest full of butterflies considering how much Taehyung loves hearing you. You stop nibbling on your lip now and allow yourself sounds and noises, his hand playing with your pussy too hard to deny. “Ah.. Taehyung.” 
“Mmm, dirty little Princess.” Taehyung hums, absorbed in his powerful role. “Loves being played with like my little slut, huh?” 
A whimper escapes you as his fingers begin toying with your hole, watching you pulse and ache as arousal rakes your neglected clit. You’re so fucking needy it’s easy for noises to spill from you, whines and cries that elicit Taehyung to only play with you more, fingering and fucking with your cunt like his own personal little toy. 
“God, look at this pussy. Always so pink and pretty for me.” 
“Tae..” You moan, face falling into the sheets as he continues his pleasurable onslaught. He hums and moans satisfyingly as he rubs  and sloshes his fingers through your wet folds, enjoying the way you squirm and wriggle around, mewling out desperate noises.  It’s only a hard smack to your ass that suddenly wakes you up from your trance, Taehyung hoisting you up higher for him. 
“Can’t you fucking stay still?” Taehyung spits, and God, did it light every nerve inside you on fire. He laughs then, and you realize he’s a demon now. “Fuck, I forgot this is a punishment.” 
And Taehyung smacks an ass cheek hard, squealing when he contacts you. His hand hovers over the afflicted area, kneading at your ass as he soothes you. “You just don’t like listening to me, do you, Princess?” 
You’re about to answer, but Taehyung interrupts with another harsh spank, absorbing the sting and arousal collects in your gut, your cunt pooling with more of your essence as you attempt to stay still. 
“You just love disobeying me to get punished, huh?” He spanks you again, Taehyung watching your ass cheek turn red and goddamn enjoy it. “Love being treated like a little whore?” 
You moan erotically, something about the way he’s holding you and massaging wherever he hits twisting your gut. You’re just so fucking horny for him all you can see is fire, his sexy dominance rattling your insides. 
He smacks your ass again with much stronger force, this time screaming a little. “What the fuck do you do when I ask you a question?” 
“Yes.. Mr. Kim.” You indulge in the smooth circles Taehyung rubs over the sting, massaging yourself back into his hand for more. “Just-just wanna be your little whore.” 
Taehyung seems to notice you indulging in his touch, suddenly leaning down over your back and pressing soft kisses to your shoulder blades, other hand rubbing your tummy. 
“Was it too much, baby?” His tone softens, palm pacifying the afflicted area as you shake your head. 
“No.. no. Just want you, Taehyung, so badly.” He hums in acknowledgment, and begins breathing down your back as you shiver at the sensation. He presses his lips to the stings he left on your ass and reaches your sex, planting his lips there for open-mouthed kisses. 
You gasp, moaning loudly when Taehyung pushes your cheeks apart for more access, playing with them as he dutifully makes out with your cunt. You groan in sheer ecstasy, his wet lips smacking all over your palpitating pussy winding you up like his favourite toy. 
He pulls away suddenly and stands to his feet, admiring your dripping pussy from the back with a tilt of his head. 
“Top of the bed. Ass up, face down.” 
You comply immediately, crawling your way over to the pillows and situating yourself comfortably, offering your ass to Taehyung with your face buried in the sheets. Taehyung doesn’t even bother undressing, only pushes his pants and boxers down to his thighs as he joins you on the mattress. 
You shift your head back for a look at that gorgeous, fat cock of his but Taehyung suddenly slaps your pulsing pussy, fitting snugly in his palm as he rubs your juice all over his hand. 
“Stay still,” he orders harshly, and you let out a moan at the ripple he sent through your sex. You grind your ass back into his hand and Taehyung scoffs a laugh, imagining that devilish smirk on him. 
“Such a dirty fucking girl for my hands, huh?” You bite your lip as a sigh escapes you.
Taehyung doesn’t verbally respond though. Instead, he brings his thick cock to your core and slaps it right down on your pussy, immediately jolting forward with a hiss. 
“Ugh.. baby.”
He slaps a little more again. “That’s not what I taught you, sweetheart.” Taehyung then secures a hand around your hip as his other snakes around your throat, choking you with a light squeeze as he growls. “What’s my fucking name?” 
“Mr. Kim.. Taehyung, oh my God.” You shiver at the compromising position, feeling him slide his hard dick through your pussy folds and your clit beats with an eager urge to be satiated. You let out a mewl and your head dips as Taehyung rubs up and down some more, slathering your pussy with his pre-cum and his dick with your essence, creating your favourite mess. 
“Dripping like fucking honey, baby. So dirty.” 
“Only yours, Taehyung. Only-” You’re cut off by a sharp moan when Taehyung suddenly plunges into your pussy, neglecting all pace and shoving his thick cock inside you. You careen forward, letting out a squeal as your walls fit him inside you. 
“Taehyung, fuck!” 
“Shit, so warm, so fucking tight.” 
He groans as he drives himself in, growing high off your fluttering walls until he bottoms out inside you. You nearly scream when his tip nudges your fucking stomach in this position, pulsing around him so tightly Taehyung threw his head back. 
“Jesus, baby, stop doing that,” he groaned. “I’ll fucking cum.” 
“You’re so big, daddy. So fucking big.” 
Taehyung hisses at the name. “Yeah? You like being filled up with this big dick?” 
You nod like a madwoman, fucking back on him to feel that sweet drag. “Yes, yes, yes, Taehyung.” 
A hand comes down on your ass and spanks you yet again, gasping pleasurably when he does. “My needy little slut, look at you hungry for my cock.” 
“Taehyung, please.” You beg, suddenly the stopped motion of him ravaging your clit. He even dares to swivel around and torture you some more, wishing he would just fucking move. “Fuck me like a little slut if you want me to be yours.” 
Silence. Dead silence. Your eyes immediately widen realizing what you said, sputtering like a fucking idiot as you attempt to look back at Taehyung. “Tae, I-” 
He suddenly wraps his hand around your throat and presses his front to your back, completely flush with you as he spears his cock deeper into your pathetic pussy, squeaking helplessly. 
“Yeah? Is that what you want? You wanna be fucked like a slut?” Taehyung’s index finger and thumb fit under your chin, squeezing lightly as his other hand dips down to brush your clit, making you shudder indefinitely. 
Taehyung laughs into your ear, the sound deep and downright ominous. “You better hold onto something, sweetheart. You don’t seem to remember,” his tone ripples through your ear canal and makes your heart race, his lips pressing to your ear.
“I rule this game.” 
And fucking hell, did you play the wrong move. Taehyung pulls out of your pussy in one swift motion only to fuck back in deep. You reel with soul-shuddering pleasure, his proximity and this lewd position making him reach places inside you that felt like heaven. 
“Oh God-Taehyung!” 
Taehyung transitions from holding your throat to snaking a hand in your hair, grabbing a fistful as he straightens himself up and begins a pace that absolutely destroys your pathetic little pussy. He pulls out and thrusts back in with such monstrous speed, you were already seeing stars behind your eyes. 
His tight and quick fucks make you sound like you’re in an erotic film, breasts dangling back and forth as Taehyung drills you into the mattress. He hisses with utter pleasure behind you, keeping your head up with his harsh hold on your hair as he cradles your hips, fucking into you with precision and hunger. 
“God, shit shit shit, Taehyung, fuck!” 
You sound crazy and you know it, he’s fucking you like a goddamn animal and you feel like one too. He’s so rough it’s shaking up your insides and the godforsaken bed, knowing damn well you’ll break it one day.
Taehyung moans in ecstasy, relishing in your tight walls hugging around his cock so desperately, almost begging him to be fucked harder. 
“Listen to you, my pretty little cockslut. So pathetic for my cock.” His deep voice infiltrates all your insides, shivering with more pleasure as he rapidly fucks into your warm and gushing sex with vigor, repeatedly shoving himself to the very brim. 
You gasp and whine as he continuously fills you up, absolutely wrecking your shit as your face buries into the pillow, moaning his name louder than you ever have. “Taehyung.. Taehyung! I swear to fucking God!” 
“Don’t swear on God, baby” Taehyung grunts behind you, hot breaths leaving his lips as he focuses on fucking you with such unhinged speed, he doesn’t even feel human. 
“He can’t help you anymore.” 
Your eyes rolled back, your pussy so destroyed, your arms gave out and grappled onto the headboard in front of you, Taehyung railing you so good you were mewling like a deranged woman. You were loud and you knew it, thankful you two never had neighbours because if you did, they’d be privy to something better than any conventional porn. 
“Taehyung, shit-so big, so fucking big!” 
“I know, baby. But my pretty little cockslut can take it, yeah?” 
You sigh out lewdly, gripping the metal bar before you so hard you’re losing strength, faltering from your position until Taehyung wraps an arm underneath your waist, jerking you flush with his front.
“Already tired, baby?” His condescending voice makes your gut twist. Hearing his harsh breaths in your ear makes you desperately fuck back on the demonic man. “Thought you were my little whore? Wanted to be fucked like a little slut?” 
“I am-I am, Taehyung. I do.. ugh.” You mewl loudly as you whine and cry out, his strong and quick fucks transforming into crazy thrusts, absolutely ruining your pussy as your body jolts forward with every penetration. 
“Fu-u-uck! Taehyung!” 
“That’s it, scream for me,” Taehyung grunts into your ear, feeling his hot breath fanning you and he uses every ounce of his strength to fuck you like a wild animal. “Fucking scream my name, baby, my filthy little slut.” 
And you do, you scream and whine like a crybaby as tears pool your eyes and you work for that goddamn orgasm raking your guts, letting Taehyung rock into your sex so quickly he truly did seem like the devil. He’s grunting and groaning and moaning like a mad man, completely relishing in your divine pussy as he lets any and everything out of his system. 
He pours all his energy into fucking you insane, your head gaining whiplash from his speed alone. You’re beginning to see real stars until Taehyung abruptly stops, letting out a cry when he pulls himself out. 
Within a second, he’s got you flipped on your back and you’re suddenly face-to-face with him, confused as all hell. Your questions are answered however when he begins fucking right back into you, drilling your sex as if he owns it because fuck, does he ever. 
“Wanna look at you when I ruin you,” he grunted, peeking down at his thick, long cock slamming into your pussy. 
“Look at you, so fucking pathetic for my dick.” Taehyung scans over your features and adores every single one. Your running mascara, your messy hair and moaning lips. God and it’s all just for him. 
“My pretty little slut,” Taehyung hovers his mouth above yours, his fast, hot breaths against your lips as you whimper and practically scream for him. “Whose pussy is this, huh? Who does this pussy belong to?” 
“You, Taehyung, oh God-oh God!” 
He’s angling upwards and stroking that damn g-spot, pressing down on your clit with his abdomen and you cry, your pleasure so overwhelming it’s making your body buzz uncontrollably. 
“Yeah? This pussy is mine? All fucking mine?” 
You nod profusely with noises of a yes, pining for that snap in your gut so, so badly. “Tae, fucking shit-I’m gonna-!” 
“You’re gonna cum, baby? All over my fat cock?” You nodded like you were insane, focusing solely on that winding up in your stomach as you lost your mind, letting every sound in the world escape because you didn’t care anymore, the dick you were getting was too good. He kept fucking and fucking and fucking into your cunt so fast and hard you were shivering and whimpering like his personal fuckdoll. 
“Fucking drench me, sweetheart. Lose your mind.” 
Right then and there, you gushed out your orgasm so hard you jolted up violently, Taehyung immediately wrapping an arm underneath your back and pressing you to his front. His mouth latched onto a nipple, sucking soft circles with his tongue as he slowed down his monstrous thrusts, only adding to your euphoric release. 
His sucking on your tits calmed your body, Taehyung so in love with licking your nipple it’s all he wanted to fucking do, and continues to do so as you came down your high. 
But Taehyung wasn’t done, popping off your tit and staring into your very soul with those bewitching eyes, snatching you up by mind, body and soul. 
He flashes you a smirk, pulling out of your warm cunt and allowing your oozing slick to drip down to your ass. You watched him carefully as he straightened himself up, catching a glorious view of your sexy husband in all his nakedness. 
His hand fits around your cheek, thumb stroking lovingly before his hand slid down to your throat and grabbed your jaw, gasping with pleasure. “I said I’d fuck this pretty face full of cum, didn’t I?” 
Your eyes widen, but your pussy tells a different story when your clit jerks at the very words. Taehyung’s eyes flit down and watch you spasm, tonguing his cheek as he smiles proudly. “Such a dirty little whore, aren’t you?” 
You bite your lip and Taehyung hisses, throwing his head back. “God, do you know how fucking weak it makes me when you do that?” 
You do it again, Taehyung groaning as he dips down to press kisses to your mouth. He puckers your lips with his grasp and lays loud, wet kisses with passion. 
He pops off to thumb your lips, whispering against them. “You’re my fucking canvas, understand that?”
You nodded with your little pout. 
“Gonna paint you with my cum and you’ll lick it like a good girl, yeah?” You let out a whimpered ‘yes’ and Taehyung hums in satisfaction, pressing one last peck before he’s straightening up again, hand curled around his shaft. 
“Open.” he demands, and your lungs lose air at the greedy, leaking tip of his flushed cock. Taehyung smears some of his pre-cum over your lips before he plunges it into your mouth, taking him eagerly. 
You prop yourself up onto your elbows, improving Taehyung’s angle and you flit up to see him groan euphorically, throwing his head back as he begins fucking your mouth for his pleasure. You watch his throat bob as your lips wrap around his hard cock tighter, sucking on him as he thrusts into your throat. 
You gag when he hits the back, but swallow as a result and Taehyung’s carnal vision snaps down to you, dark and hungry with desire. He soaks in the image of your pretty face taking his cock, so enamoured by it he was driven wild. 
“Fuck fuck fuck, not gonna last. Such an obedient little cumslut.” He groans in ecstasy, deciding to give him hell and you bob a little for him. Taehyung immediately releases a throaty grunt and secures his hands on your head, bringing you over his cock hard and fast as you gag and spatter all over him. 
“Fuck, shit-!” Taehyung’s insane, breathing harshly and groaning as he fucks and fucks until his hot cum shoots inside your throat. You squeal as the white, salty liquid invades you, ropes and ropes of his semen spilling inside. Taehyung’s guttural grunts make you horny all over again, watching him throw his head back and his abdomen tighten. He draws his cock out only to pump some cum onto your neck and collarbones, falling back on the bed and letting him paint you as he desires. 
Taehyung watches eagerly as he angles some onto your face, spilling over your chin and lips as you stick out your tongue. You meet his wild eyes and watch him groan as cum lands on your tongue. 
“Fucking hell, such a nasty girl.” 
You catch the last drops on your tongue, closing your mouth but not swallowing just yet. Taehyung comes down his high and breathes harshly, carnal vision only on you as he adores his hot seed littering your body.
“Show me my cum,” he orders between uneven breaths, eyes obsidian. “Wanna see my cum in this pretty mouth.” 
You open up for him, letting him catch a sweet view of his filthy, white cum in your throat. He smirks happily as a hand grabs your chin, shifting you around to look properly. 
“Tongue out, my little whore.” 
You comply and do so, some of his cum spilling out of your pliant mouth and Taehyung licks his lips at the sinful image. It’s dripping out of the corner of your mouth and fuck, do you look like a perfect mess of his kids.  
“Fucking hell, I swear I’ll come again.” He groans because he can’t take it, his cum’s already hot on your skin and now tears and saliva riddle your face and body, biting his lip to contain a feral grunt. 
Taehyung thumbs the cum that spills out of your mouth back in, eyes darker than space and pupils dilated with wonder. “Don’t waste my cum, pretty girl.” 
You wrap your lips around his thumb and watch him intently, hands holding onto his forearm. 
“Swallow for me, sweetheart.” Taehyung encourages with a coo, and you confidently swallow as you suck on his thumb. Taehyung groans with pleasure, eyeing you like his favourite meal. 
“Fuck, such a good fucking girl, my good girl.” 
You hum in satisfaction and he draws his thumb out, pressing a kiss to your lips as he removes himself from your body and sits back on his shins, still breathing harshly after the way he exerted his body. 
His eyes flit over your figure and his once dark, dark eyes lighten into his chocolate brown ones, wetting his lips as it seems he returns to earth. You lay back and allow yourself to catch your breath too, not having breathed enough through your nose when you were stuffed full of his cock. 
Taehyung oddly swallows as you see his expression change, suddenly all smirky and confident to one of hesitancy, his flushed face losing that confidence, almost as though he felt.. ashamed?  His eyes shift away from you then, crawling off the bed and standing to his feet. 
You watch him with confusion as he simply doesn’t even look back at you. You lift off the bed onto your elbows, questioning him of his destination and he quickly steps towards the bathroom as he mumbles ‘gonna take a shower’. You open your mouth to query him further, but he’s already disappeared by the time you can. 
You enter the bathroom carefully, listening to the shower water running as you spot Taehyung simply standing under the water stream in all his beautiful bareness. You pout your lips with concern, stepping over to the shower door and carefully sliding it open. 
Taehyung seems too caught up in his head to even question why you’re joining him, rather rubs his face as he lets the water beat down his body. He inhales a deep breath, attempting to disassemble the stress on his features. 
You press your hands to his back, sliding them up to his wet shoulders as you feel for his tension, and alarmingly feel far too much. You become concerned, hugging his shoulders as you press your chest to his back, the water now streaming down your body too as you whisper. 
“Tae…” 
He doesn’t say anything, it’s merely silence, only the shower water creating any sound. He doesn’t shrug you off either, however, knowing he’s taking his time to respond, and you’d allow him whatever time he needed. You begin caressing his shoulders as you lay against your husband, trying again. 
“My love, what’s wrong?” 
“I... I don’t deserve this.” Is all he mutters, his head hanging low as the water coats both your entangled bodies. You squeeze him into a tighter hug, pressing your cheek to his wide, sulking back. 
“What don’t you deserve, baby?” 
“You…” He whispers, his voice wavering in strength. “I just… I don’t deserve you.. or your love.” 
Taehyung breathes harder as he grows upset, shrugging off your touch and seating himself on the shower bench before him. The water continued to run over him, his vision fixated on the floor as you could practically see a gloomy, grey cloud of rain haunting him. 
“Why do you say that, Tae?” 
“You’re just.. so loving and caring and I don’t even deserve it. I don’t deserve you.. I cause you so much pain.”  Taehyung tucks his forehead into his palm, rubbing it with distress. 
“Hey, Taehyung, talk to me,” you step closer to him and snake a hand through his wet hair, another one falling to his shoulder as you gently hug him to your bare stomach. “Why are you saying this?” 
“I just fucking-” He began, but composed himself better, restarting his sentence. “You’re in such a vulnerable place right now and I just.. used you for my pleasure? And I enjoyed it? What the fuck is wrong with me..” Taehyung reflected on himself, deeply conflicted as he ran through the scenario in his head. 
“That was so fucking selfish of me, and you let me because you wanted to take care of me… not even thinking about yourself.” Taehyung’s tone is far from strong now, slowly losing its composure as his head falls into his hands. “You’re so caring. So, so loving and kind.. I don’t deserve you.” 
You feel your heart fracture listening to him, rubbing his shoulder pacifyingly. 
“What is wrong with me?” 
You could feel the sheer guilt radiating off his body as he agonized over this, all of this, and your chest floods with sadness. You assumed this is what’s called a top drop. All the endorphins and feel-good chemicals from sex have left Taehyung’s body, and now that he’s returned to earth, he’s been sadly reminded of the dire situation at hand, your heart-breaking reality. 
He must’ve been feeling the weight of that; the frustration of his talk with his father, the exposure of your relationship, the guilt of using you for his pleasure and it was all crashing down on him hard. You immediately soften for him, embracing his shrunken form as you press him to your stomach and soothe his back, imbuing in him all the love and care in the world. 
“Baby, please don’t say that. You know you had my full consent and I wanted it.. I wanted you to be selfish for once, Tae.” 
“But I just feel so-” He took another deep breath, hands falling over his knees. “I feel so bad, I feel so terrible.” 
“But you aren’t, Tae. I wanted you to do those things to me, I trust you, okay? You know I would’ve used the safe word if I felt uncomfortable, but I didn’t, right?” You lightly massage his wet hair, leaning down to press a chaste kiss to his head. “You’re my husband, and if something affects you, it affects me too, baby. I wanted you to let it out… I love you.” You spoke to him in a quiet, soft tone, attempting to quell the storm that shrouded his heart. 
“I know we have a lot on our plate right now, but a wise man once told me that whatever we do, we’ll do it together, right?” 
You earn a small laugh from Taehyung then, inviting a smile to curve your lips. “Ah, there’s his cute laugh.” You booped his nose gently and felt Taehyung relax in your hold, finally raising his head and gazing up at you. 
“Whatever we’ll do, we’ll do together.” He repeated the words, watching the smallest of smiles etch onto his lips as your hands cupped his beautiful bread cheeks. 
Taehyung stood to his full height before you, engulfing you in a sweet kiss as his palms cradled your waist. He held oh, so close that entire dreadful night, sheltering you in his arms as though he were protecting his most precious treasure. 
All while wondering what he ever did to deserve you. 
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It was the next day, and you convinced yourself that everything was going to be okay. Taehyung had to urgently return to work and so did you, having spoken your supportive little pep-talk to each other in your foyer this morning. 
“Look, big news is out, and you may encounter reporters trying to invade your privacy and snap photos of you.” Taehyung explained as he fixed your blouse’s cuffs, speaking encouragingly. “Don’t let it get to you, okay? We’re going to do our daily routine of me dropping you off at work, but I know loads of people will be outside your company’s building to bother you.” Taehyung sighed after that, bringing his fingers to run through your hair until he cradled your cheek, thumb stroking your skin. 
“I’ll protect you until you get to the building, but I can’t help you when you’re past those doors.” Taehyung informs you sadly. “I’m sorry.” 
“Don’t apologize, baby.” You reassure him, bringing a hand over his holding your cheek. “I’m strong, remember? I can do this, Tae, I promise.” 
Taehyung smiled warmly at that, leaning down and capturing your lips with his own, kissing you as tenderly as he could. Your heart fluttered with butterflies, suddenly the dread of today becoming less daunting. 
He breaks away after soft, gentle kisses, his forehead pressed to yours as you squeezed his hand against your cheek. He replicated a deep breath for you to follow, and you do so with a nod to yourself that you’re okay, you’ve got this. You can handle any and everything that comes your way, you’ve been doing so for many years and can do the same once again. 
But the one crucial detail you conveniently forgot is that if you apply tension to something over, and over and over again, it will eventually break. 
You wouldn’t remember that for a while. 
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You swallow as you enter your department, having already dealt with the cameras outside snapping innumerable photos of Taehyung and some security helping you into your building. 
Taehyung had trouble letting your hand go before you would vanish behind the doors, finding his once mysterious eyes revealing a multitude of concern and worry, so much so it seemed he would cry at any moment. 
It clogged your throat with unbearable agony, squeezing his hand back that you’d be alright, and Taehyung understood. It still didn’t deter him from pulling you close so he could embrace your form however, engulfing you in his warm hug as his nose pressed into your hair. 
“I love you.” Is what he whispered by your ear, and you whispered it back as your arms winded around him, gripping his suit like your lifeline. 
“I love you more, Tae.” 
But now, as you stand in the hallway leading to your department, you couldn’t help but notice the impertinent way every eye openly stares at you, gawking, sending dirty looks that make your heart nestle itself further into the pit of your stomach. 
They were all judging, boring black, searing holes into your back, and it's as though every hushed whisper was suddenly blaring in your eyes, louder than any alarm in the world. You were on edge now, contemplating the millions of terrible things people could be thinking about you, and it wasn’t healthy for your overthinking mind. 
You pass the doors after you push them open, feeling more pairs of once occupied eyes flashing to you immediately. You keep your head down, attempting to be furtive as you pace over to your office as quickly as possible. Pulling out your phone as any sort of distraction, you try to keep yourself from meeting anyone else’s judgemental gazes.
But your phone wasn’t any different, either. 
When you clicked your phone, all you saw appear right above your precious selca of you and Taehyung on your Greek trip were a multitude of comments and notifications. 
Your father, your brother Yoongi, Hana, even your mother had attempted to call you. You had texts that consisted of multiple people questioning the recent news, and even what was meant to be your private social media was being flooded with nasty comments. Your heart sinks. 
‘Why would he say yes to someone like you?’ 
‘Everyone knew it was fake, he would never willingly marry you’ 
‘You don’t deserve him.’ 
You can’t believe what you’re reading. You already feel sick, your chest filled with this wad of agony you couldn’t chase down. In all your reading of the vile comments, you end up bumping into your co-worker Yeji, nearly running her over. 
She fumbles a little, and you immediately scramble for an apology. “Yeji, oh my God! I’m so sorry.” 
“Y/N, God. I’ve been looking for you! Come, come,” Yeji links her arm with yours and flashes everyone staring a scolding look. “Let’s get you out of here.” 
She ushers you through the daunting hall and into your office, shutting the door behind you both before she turns to you. 
“Y/N, what’s going on? I’m literally hearing a million different things about you.” 
You worriedly set your things down as you silence your buzzing phone. “What.. are you hearing?” 
“Is it true, Y/N? About your marriage with Kim Taehyung?” 
You slide off your coat as you send her a pained look, but hide your troubles behind a composed face. You wonder when you got so good at it, most likely a habit you picked up from your husband. 
“Y/N, c’mon. You know you can tell me anything. I’m really worried for you, babes.” She tells you sincerely. You soften up listening to how earnest she is, sighing before you reply. 
“It’s true, Yeji.” You inform her. “Our marriage was arranged at first but we really did fall in love. I really..” You pause, growing emotional, running through every awful thing that’s happened lately. “I really do love him.” 
Yeji didn’t need to hear you say more in order to distinguish the truth, the look in your eyes alone confesses your genuity. She sighs, feeling your pain from across the room. 
“It’s okay, Y/N. You don’t need to explain it to me.” She softly assures you. “I can tell you’re both really in love, I just hope things are okay for you right now.” 
Your vision flits down to your screen that flashes horrid notifications, gulping down as you return a half-smile to her. “Yeah, I hope so, too.” 
Yeji sees your distracted eyes and sullen figure, trying to change the subject. “Hey, we’ve got that meeting with Mary. Remember how much she loved your pitch last week? Today’s the day to really convince her, huh?” 
You crack a smile at that, thankful that you had at least one person in your corner, and maybe this wouldn’t be as hard as you first thought. 
“Yeah, let’s give it a try.”
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Tick. Tick. Tick.
You were waiting for the breaking point. 
It’d been a few days since the incident first hit the news, and you’ve been drained of all your energy to the lowest point you’ve ever reached in your life. 
You nibble on your index finger as you silently watch the news broadcast from the crack in your office window blinds, the rest of your department all turning heads to everyone’s laptops and computer screens alike. 
It’s the broadcast of Taehyung standing before an army of paparazzi and reporters, accompanied by some personnel and officials as he publicly apologizes for what’s been deemed a scandal now. You feel your heart clench, contemplating how much stress is most likely weighing on Taehyung’s broad shoulders. 
And still, he seamlessly prevails, having made a sincere apology and bowing to everyone with the utmost respect. You feel like crying all over again,watching him apologize for something that was never his fault. You’ve attempted to catch any wind of Taehyung, but he’s been nowhere in sight, too occupied with the company these last few days to even come home some nights. 
Your anxiety has reached its maximum point, even now as the broadcast switches to the new rundown of the current situation. Some eyes flash to your office and you immediately jump back, having spent much of your time hiding in here. 
You fumble back against your desk, hand hitting your phone that suddenly lights up with a call from an unknown number. Knowing you shouldn’t answer, you still do, acknowledging that any call could be something important. 
But to your loss, it’s rather an anonymous person spewing curse words and hurtful insults you’ve heard enough times now. You let out a deep sigh, letting them ramble on before you end the call and block the number, tossing your phone onto your desk roughly. 
You lean against the desk to take deep breaths, remembering the exercises Taehyung took his time to study and then taught you. You try to envision him here, that he was breathing with you and holding your hand, whispering sweet encouragements as he embraces you. 
You were drifting off into that daydream before a message popped up on your screen.
Your eyes widened in horror, swallowing thickly as you read the graphic contents of a death threat. You felt tears pool your eyes, wondering how ghastly people could be. The insults were brutal, but wishing such awful things upon a person was a line you couldn’t believe others so easily crossed. You wonder how much longer this is going to continue, how much longer you’ll have to deal with all this until you break into millions of pieces. You feel your chest tighten with this certain pain that never goes away. 
The messages keep rolling in, in almost an ominous sequence and you muster the courage to simply block the number, throwing your phone away again. 
You want to call Taehyung, text him, something just to keep yourself from adopting an anxiety attack, having told you that if anything ever gets too much to simply call him, and he’ll drop everything in a matter of seconds. 
But you couldn’t do it, you already felt sick. Every time you opened your phone you were waiting for a malicious comment to pop up, to get another phone call or death threat message sent to you. Your email was flooded with a myriad of hate, your work email wasn't even safe. 
You couldn’t even leave your office without wanting to hide behind a paper bag, everyone’s prying eyes boring holes into your figure each time you passed by. It’s not like you hadn’t heard the comments being said about you either. Every trip to the women’s bathroom was a nightmare, simply sitting in a stall as you listened to women gossip and say the awfulest of things. 
Some of your male co-workers talked the cruelest shit about you as well. One time you approached a group to work the fax machine, only to walk in on a conversation detailing what extravagantly exorbitant things you fuck your husband for. 
‘It’s gotta be for the vacations, did you not see them in Greece a week ago?’
‘Nah, it’s the brand name shit. She probably sucks his dick just for a Prada purse.’
‘And he probably shuts her up by doing it again.’
Their hearty laughs bring tears to your eyes, feeling violated in ways you couldn’t even describe. You remembered telling Taehyung you were strong, promising him you’d be okay, that you’d truly be able to get through this tough time and his support would be enough. 
Turns out you’re one hell of a liar. 
You feel ill again, heaving as the graphic details of the death threats mixed with the mistreatment at work churn your stomach. You simply grab your things and make a run for your boss’ office. You inform her of your dwindling health and she worriedly grants you permission to head home, too far in your head to even consider what you’ll do. 
Home was the same as work anyway; you still received the calls, the messages, even watching TV was hard knowing that with Taehyung’s reputation and almost world-renowned company, you were headlining too many news channels. 
You clutch your purse as tightly as you could, swallowing thickly as you keep your head down and pass by everyone again, feeling the hostility and negativity through the tension-filled energy. 
Placing a foot in front of the other was easy until you smack dab bumped into someone’s frame in the lobby. You peer up to find Alex, feeling every single one of your nerves going into panic mode and you immediately attempt to scamper by him.
He pulls you back, and your heart races.  
“Y/N, wait,” 
“What do you want?” You spit at him, eyes already bordering on tears. “Don’t you dare even talk to me.” 
“But Y/N-” 
“God, Taehyung was fucking right.” You sneer, clutching your purse for dear life. “Can you not take no for a fucking answer?” 
“Y/N, I just wanted to apologize to you. I’m so sorry about those photos that got out, I didn’t think anyone would photograph us.” 
“Well now they have,” you state the obvious with hostility. “Why would you even touch me knowing I’m married? And to a famous CEO at that? What is seriously wrong with you, Alex? This all happened because of you.” 
Alex takes offence to that, immediately countering. “Me?” 
“Yes, you. You should’ve never done anything knowing I have a husband. What did you even think to gain out of your confession?” Usually you wouldn’t be spewing such rude words, but your mental state was too fragile now to be kind. You’ve had the same insults, death threats and detrimental thoughts swarming your head for days now, letting it all out into some sort of outlet.
“I was concerned for you, Y/N. You don’t understand the rumours about Kim Taehyung’s anger issues that have always been going around.” 
You pinch your brows together, baffled. “What?” 
He scoffs, almost derisively. “You don’t get it, do you?” 
“Get what?” 
 “Did you know he dislocated the CEO of Han Co’s knee when he was in high school?” 
You're thrown off by the information, Taehyung never having mentioned such a thing. Alex watches you hesitate, catching you off-guard in that moment. 
“See? You didn’t know. He’s also torn someone’s ACL and broken a jaw too. He has a history of violence and being unable to control his anger, but his family kept it all under wraps ‘cause he was fucking spoon-fed everything his entire life.” 
You immediately scowl at him. “Talk about my husband like that again and I’ll kick your knee in, asshole.” 
Alex scoffs. “Whatever. The point is I was scared for your wellbeing and when I saw your injury and the fact that you disappeared for two weeks, I thought he had you trapped in an abusive relationship. You can’t fucking blame me for thinking that knowing his past.” 
This information is fairly new to you, and Alex does have the slightest bit of right in that, but it was never right of him to assume such immoral things about someone he didn’t know, and touch you without your permission. 
“I don’t give a fuck, Alex. You don’t even know Taehyung at all, how would you feel if someone used your past against you to assume the worst?” 
That’s when Alex was taken aback, letting up his argument as he let that sink in. 
“Exactly. You can’t do that without knowing someone’s present, let alone touching someone without their permission who is literally married.” You lecture him, knowing he needed to hear this. “You ruined two people’s lives because of it, this is all your fault.” 
“Please,” Alex laughs disdainfully. “Faking your marriage with a rich CEO for money was all my fault?” 
Your heart cinches, tired of this same shitty narrative. “It had nothing to do with money. Never speak to me again, Alex. Goodbye.” 
You hear him laugh as you make your way to the front doors, listening to him yell out. “You’re forgetting you work here with me, Y/N! And I can either make your life very easy or very hard right now..” 
You sensed the threat in his tone and had to stop your tracks, whirling around with a raised brow. “Did you just threaten me?” 
“Maybe I did, maybe I didn’t.” He shrugs condescendingly. “Either way, I think you should act a lot less like your husband and be friendlier these days. You’re not exactly on people’s good side anymore.” 
Your eyes flash to the amount of people once again, eyeing you as though you were an alien from outer space, finding the very, very small strength to survive the way their horrifying eyes bore into your soul. 
But you didn’t care. No way in hell would you fold to this sorry excuse of a man, using this opportunity to rather threaten you than apologize for his indecent behaviour. 
“Fuck you, Alex. Don’t let HR hit you on the way out.” You send him a saccharine smile and a condescending wave, busting out of the doors and immediately being whisked with fresh air. You soak it in, earning a mere second of peace before the flash of a camera suddenly stuns your vision. A few stray reporters come out to begin hounding you all over again, cursing yourself for not having texted your personal guards Taehyung hired for your convenience. 
Thankfully you spot the familiar car parked by the curb and scramble for it, catching the attention of the guard inside as you avoid the cameras as best you can. You ignore all the questions and demands for comments, slipping by them and thankfully settling inside the car once you’ve escaped them. 
You ask the driver to step on the gas home, not even taking a look back at what you leave behind. 
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“Did you get home safely, Princess?” 
You relished in the sound of your husband’s velvety voice, the only calm you knew with a roaring storm outside, one also inside your heart.
You’d arrived home and simply wallowed around, attempting to subdue your sorrow though only found your mind revisiting all your troubles. Alex’s words are what clouded your thoughts, never having known those untold things about Taehyung. You didn’t care much though, Taehyung is not the person he used to be, and you wouldn’t allow the past to define his present. 
Your phone wouldn’t stop bothering you, having nearly ripped your hair out over the fearful notifications. You attempted to silence all of them but couldn’t because the only means of communication with Taehyung was through your phone. 
You laid in bed now, watching the rain pour outside through your balcony doors as you attempted to sleep. Your phone buzzed and thankfully revealed your husband’s name very late at night, having called you knowing your fear of thunderstorms, and ensuring you were okay after the usual reporter raid. 
“I did, thank you.” 
“How was your day?” Taehyung asked so softly, you felt tears flood your eyes, recently the question of how you are provoking your immediate tears. 
“It was okay… how was yours?” 
“Don’t lie to me, Princess.” Taehyung’s warm, dulcet voice speaks. “You know I can tell.” 
You clutch your hand over your mouth, holding back the tears that threaten to spill until they eventually escape.  
“I’m not lying, Taehyung. I’m okay.” 
You’re not sure where Taehyung is, but you do hear the evident sound of him sighing. 
“Jagiya..” 
“I promise, Tae.” You sniffle a little, squealing slightly when the sound of thunder suddenly roars. Another flash of lightning strikes as well, listening to the wind howl dangerously outside your window. You begin to worry for Taehyung and his whereabouts, hoping he’s close to home and not a prisoner to the storm. 
“Taehyung, will you be home soon?” You cling to your covers harder as you manage your fear, sniffling yet again. “Please tell me you’re close.” 
Suddenly the sound of your bedroom door swinging open alarms you, turning around to find your suit-cladded, damp husband standing with his phone clutched to his ear. 
“I’m right here, Princess.” 
You’re in shock for only a second before you lose all composure. Your facade crumbles before him, having needed him more than you needed air. You immediately begin to cry as emotion clogs your throat, phone forgotten.
And Taehyung felt himself break as he rushes towards you. “Y/N...”
Taehyung forgets his phone on the nightstand and quickly slips into bed with you, sliding in right behind your crying form and wrapping you in his arms, squeezing tightly. 
He hushes you as his fingers card through your hair, clasping you even tighter when a bout of mighty thunder booms outside again, and you flinch with fear. You weep into his chest harder as he tightens his embrace, so consumed by everything, so overwhelmed and overrun with emotion it was too painful to bear. 
“It’s okay, Angel. Shh,” he gently soothes you, lips and nose pressed to your hair. “I’m here… I’m right here.” 
You snuggle into him closer, sobs catching the back of your throat as you wail, the thunderstorm only heightening your turbulent emotions. 
“I’m sorry, Taehyung… I’m so sorry.” 
“Don’t be, Princess.” Taehyung comforts you. “It’s okay.. shh.” 
You were eternally grateful for his loving, kind soul, discrediting anything Alex had to say about him. You knew Taehyung, and he was the most selfless person you’d ever met. 
“You don’t have to say sorry, pretty girl.” He kisses your hair, and the iteration of your pet name eases you, making your heart flutter. You peer up at him with your red, puffy eyes and slightly runny nose, but Taehyung still thinks you’re beautiful in every right of the word. 
He cracks a wholesome smile, delicately removing a strand of hair from your cheek. 
“I love you,” he whispers, as if it were your own little secret. “You know that, right?” 
 “I love you more, Tae.” You whisper back, feeling happiness for the first time in days. You realize it was also the first time you’d really seen your husband, noticing the slightly pale look of his skin, his tired eyes, evident of how much the recent events must’ve been taking a toll on him. 
And yet when he looked at you, he gazed at you with the world in his eyes. 
He reaches over to his nightstand and pulls out some tissues, bringing them to your nose and wiping you clean. You grasp them in your hands and tidy yourself, tossing them in your trash can.
You settle into Taehyung’s arms then, telling him he should change after his long day, though he said he felt comfortable enough being with you. You both fell into a comforting silence, simply laying in his arms as his fingertips tread through your hair. 
“Everything will be okay, Princess.” He reassures you quietly, kissing your cheek as you feel sleep beckon you. “It’s hard right now, but we’ll find a way.” 
You nod to him, sniffling as your crying finally comes to a still. You lean in and kiss Taehyung’s neck deeply, the breadth of his hug so very warm, safe.
“And we’ll do it together.” You say, feeling Taehyung smile against your hair as he clutches you indefinitely. 
“You mean everything to me, you know?” He tells you sincerely, finding peace in the calm beating of his heart. “If something’s happening, you can tell me, baby.” 
You wanted to tell Taehyung about everything, wanted to relay all the terrible and awful things that have been happening, to tell him about Alex’s cruel words. 
But instead of burdening him with the information, you merely nestle yourself further into his arms, allowing yourself the tranquility of slumbering in his embrace and a peaceful, quiet mind with the love of your life. 
“I’m okay, Tae. As long as I’m with you.” 
He smiles, but you didn’t know he could detect something was going on, even if he didn’t know exactly what. 
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‘Did you hear Kim Taehyung’s actually violent?’ 
‘God, and she probably only stays with him for the money and sex.’ 
‘I would never degrade myself like that.’ 
‘What a gold-digging whore.’ 
Tick. Tick. Tick. 
You wouldn’t break, no, you couldn’t. 
It didn’t matter the vicious looks coming your way, the new headlines parading rumours of Taehyung’s allegedly violent past. They were resurfacing old dirt on him that barely seemed incriminating, but was being utilized as a weapon by the media. 
You had no clue how the Kim family was handling all the accusations, you didn’t know how Taehyung was handling it either, worrying for his well-being above everything. 
Your phone incessantly buzzed and lit up with notifications; more online hate, more calls and texts, more harassment. Every news article was filled with the most vile of words, your email either had graphic death threats or horrid images that disturbed your very insides. 
And every ticking of that goddamn clock in your office sounded off new daunting, soul-crushing thoughts that plagued your mind. 
Tick. 
‘What if I’m really not good enough for him?’ 
Tick. 
‘Why does he even love me?’
Tick. 
‘This is all my fault.’
Tick. 
‘I don’t deserve him.’ 
Your mind was spiralling, tumbling down a proverbial black hole that threatened to swallow you whole. Every place you knew wasn’t safe anymore, nothing was safe. 
Your workplace had disastrously deteriorated, Alex having taken your last comment and driven it right to the ground with having strategically spread the word. He really transformed into the epitome of a douchebag having talked up rumours and assumptive falsities to worsen your reputation and Taehyung’s. 
You had to laugh, and men say women are snakes. 
You couldn’t even eat your lunch without wanting to throw it up, the embarrassment of always eating alone in your office, the work that gets purposefully piled on you. The messes people leave behind for you to clean up, the secrecy, the exclusion, the blatant neglect of your presence. The ignoring, the shit-talking behind your back, the gossiping, the looks, the rumours; it all amalgamated into spelling your insanity. 
The ticks were beginning to eat at your already collapsing brain, wondering when that clock got so fucking loud. Why does it feel like you can hear what everyone’s thinking? Why can you feel the way everyone hates you? Sense the hostility and awful things they’re wishing upon you? 
This feeling in your chest was unbearable, attempting to breathe through the almost normal intrusion but only felt a heavier wad of anxiety suffocating you. Even your management treated you differently, they didn’t choose you for any projects considering your reputation now, your creativity was dwindling along with your mental state and you were more scatter-brained and out of it than you’ve ever been. 
Sickness was an understatement by now, you felt so incredibly ailing you needed to get away, needed a break from everything. 
Needed a break from life. 
Tick. 
‘Why am I still here?’ 
Tick. 
“I’m no good for him.’
Tick. 
‘I only ruin Taehyung’s life’ 
Tick. 
‘I ruin everything I touch.’ 
You grunt in frustration at that fucking clock, snatching up the damn thing and violently prying out the batteries, tossing them in the trash with uneven breaths. You feel light-headed now, reaching your limit as multiple thoughts swarm your head, though a distinct one screams out to you like your true calling. 
‘You need to leave.’
You had to, you were no good for anybody. You were truly worthless, wasting everyone’s time and energy, wasting space that could be easily filled by someone much better. You’ve made the stupidest of mistakes that have only now ruined other people’s lives.
You escape your building once the work day is over, thankful for the rainy, downcast weather having warded off the reporters and conveniently masking your tears. You were driven home, quickly shedding off all your things as quickly as possible in a panic. 
You zoom past Mrs. Choi and Seo, immediately booking it for your suitcase with a racing, incoherently thinking mind. 
What good are you truly? Wouldn’t Taehyung’s life just be simpler without you in it? All you seem to do is cause him misfortune, everything has always been your fault. 
Your first ever argument due to your jealousy? Your horrible fight all because you couldn’t tell a pushy coworker no? Your inability to fight off a sleazy man because of fear? 
It was always you, it was never him. Why does Taehyung even stay with you? Is what Hisung said true? 
‘He only keeps you to fuck you.’ 
No, no. Taehyung’s not like that, Taehyung loves you, and he would never do such a disgusting, atrocious thing. You love Taehyung too, more than anything you have your entire life. 
But maybe this is for the better. 
Taehyung deserves someone much better, you’ve always thought about this notion. The online hate and comments only fueled your insecurities, contemplating everything you’ve read is true. Taehyung should be with someone richer, prettier, smarter, skinnier, someone with a better reputation than you’ve ever had. Someone much more respectable, someone who would look stunning by his side. 
Someone that wasn’t you. 
You hurtle your belongings into your suitcase, forgetting all forms of organization and simply stuffing what you could inside. You needed to leave, you needed to remove yourself from his life and watch from afar how much easier it would be without you. Maybe subtracting yourself from the equation truly fixes everything, maybe Taehyung’s father was genuinely correct. 
It’s all because of you, isn’t it? 
Tears flood your vision as you rapidly pack, nabbing at things to include as your mind races a mile a minute.
“What are you doing?” 
You snap behind you to find Taehyung standing in the doorframe, practically horrified as he watches you pack. 
“Are.. are you leaving?” 
A single word doesn’t escape you, only acknowledging your husband’s presence and returning to your packing, shutting everything out of your brain until you ultimately, shut down yourself. 
As though you’d already reached the shore. 
“Why are you packing? Where are you going?” Taehyung worriedly queries to get an answer, but only hears crickets. 
He grows panicked beyond anything he’s ever felt before. He steps towards you and places a hand on your shoulder. “Are-are you leaving me, Princess?” 
His touch and the sheer sorrow in his voice clog up your esophagus, burning your lungs to hold back your tears, to keep it all locked up inside. 
“I have to go,” you quietly sniffle, rapidly wiping away a tear as you continue to pack. 
“What?” Taehyung exasperates. “No, you can’t just go.” 
“And why can’t I?” You counter as you turn around and shrug off his touch, eyes watery as you meet Taehyung’s glossy ones. 
He looks utterly terrified, but most of all, Taehyung looks betrayed. It was the look of betrayal that tainted his features, hurt beyond words as he struggles to even speak. 
“How-how could you?” His voice breaks, stepping back in shock. “Why are you doing this, baby?” 
You bite your lip to contain your emotions, swallowing it all down. “I have to leave, Taehyung.” You return to your messy packing, Taehyung’s wounded voice barely able to be heard. 
“You.. you said you’d never leave me..” He mutters. “You said I had you.. you said I always had you. You said that, baby, why would you leave me?” 
The shatter of his timbre crushes your heart, tears spilling from you as you tuck everything into your Godforsaken suitcase. “I’m not good for you, Taehyung. You need to accept that.” 
“No.” He denies you, the miserable look on his face utterly agonizing. “Why are you doing this, Princess? We’re supposed to do this together, how could you fucking leave?” 
“Because I ruin everything I touch!” You suddenly screech, reaching your breaking point. “I have broken… everything I touch. My family, your family, your company, and now you. I’m good for nothing, Taehyung, and you need to let me go for your own good.” 
Taehyung seems as though he didn’t understand anything, stepping towards you and grasping your arms desperately. “What do you mean? How could you say that to me? It’s not true..” Taehyung’s eyes are glassy, rimming with tears. “I’m barely fucking holding on these days, you know? The company is a mess, my family’s been of no help and you’re the only thing I have left. You can’t do this to me, to us.” 
“Don’t you get it, Tae?” Your pained expression searches for his distraught eyes. “I’m doing this for us, I’m doing this for your sake.” 
“How is this for my sake?!” Taehyung raises his voice, more lost than he’s ever been his entire life. “Do you not love me anymore, is that it? You can’t find it in yourself to love me after all of this?” 
Your heart shatters into pieces, holding your hand to your chest where you ache profusely. It feels suffocating, like you can’t breathe, and tears begin to cascade down your cheeks uncontrollably. 
“Baby, please. I’m doing this because I love you, because I want the best for you and it’s not me.” 
“You are the best for me, Y/N!” Taehyung pleads with you, his grip on your arms tightening. “Please, please don’t do this. You’re all I have left.” He begs of you as small tears escape him, swallowing through the pain. “You’re all I have. I’ll do anything, okay? I know how much pain you’ve been in and I’ve been such a terrible husband for not being here enough.” Taehyung suddenly puts all the blame on himself, your lungs deteriorating into ashes. “But I’ll do better, I’ll come home more often and try harder, I promise.” 
“This isn’t about you, Tae..” 
Taehyung laughs, but it’s more like he’s exhaling to release the tension in his chest, eyes brimming over with tears. “‘It’s not you, it’s me’, right? Is that really what you’re going to say to me?”
“Tae.. I’m serious. I need to go because seeing the pain.. the trouble I cause you is too unbearable. You deserve someone better than me.” 
“Don’t say that!” Taehyung uncharacteristically yells, his breaths heavy where his heart most likely thuds. “You don’t get to decide that. Don’t you understand that I can see the pain I cause you?  That it’s so much worse than mine? When will you understand that your pain is my pain, too? I’m your husband, Y/N, seeing you hurt hurts me more than anything I could ever imagine.” Taehyung argues passionately as he gestures between you both, tone rising in severity. 
“But you know what makes it easier? Knowing I have you, knowing we’re together and we’re in this together, that it’ll always be us against the world, just like you said.” He presents his words pressingly, eyes a mess of pleas. “So don’t do this, baby. Don’t walk away from us… don’t walk away from me.” 
“This hurts me more than it’s hurting you, Taehyung,” you explain, clutching your palms into fists that so, so badly want to hold him, but you refrain knowing you need to sever yourself from him now. “I can’t stand by your side knowing I caused this, knowing I only ever cause you pain, ruin everything I touch because that’s all I’m good for.” 
“Stop saying that, stop it!” Taehyung shakes you as he begs, not understanding this, not seeing anything clearly as the rain outside drowns your room in darkness and gloom, already dooming this conversation with misery. “You don’t ruin things, baby. It’s not your fault. Please, I love you.. more than anything in this world. If I don’t have you, then I have nothing…”
You see his soul breaking in his eyes, and God, you can’t even breathe without it burning everything inside you. “Without me.. you’ll lose your problems, baby.” You tell him softly, sniffling as you attempt to reason. “You’re better off without me, so please.. just let me go.” 
“No!” Taehyung stresses, only releasing you to pace the room all of a sudden, appearing distressed, almost crazy. Too many thoughts swarm his head as his mental state nose-dives into a pit of despair. He runs a hand through his hair as he wraps his head around this, tear-ridden eyes meeting yours. 
“I will fight for us.. I believe in us.” He tells you seriously. “Tell me you love me enough.” Taehyung suddenly pulls back the ends of his suit and wets his lips, hands on his hips awaiting you. “You said even when I had nothing that I’d always have you, so say it.”
“All I ever do is bring you unhappiness, Taehyung.” You emphasize. “I ruin everything I touch, and I don’t know what to do anymore.”
“You promised,” Taehyung whispers in a tone of betrayal, steely eyes meeting yours as he pierces your wounded soul. “You promised me you were my person, that you’d always stay by my side. You promised me.”
You couldn’t take it anymore, your pain was festering into a wound so severe nothing could remedy it at all. You shed profuse tears now, but nothing ever quells that stabbing pain in your chest, the pit in your stomach, the cinching of your heart begging for any relief as you watch Taehyung crumble before you. 
“Love me enough.” Taehyung’s timbre breaks apart as he beseeches. “Love me enough, Y/N. Love me enough to stay.”
You struggle watching him, looking up to the ceiling for a higher power, an angel, something to get rid of this terrible feeling in your chest. More tears escape as the pain only multiples, all your weeping catching in your throat with sharp breaths.
Taehyung joins you in crying, tears trickling down the cheeks of the usually stoic man. He paces towards you and engulfs your cheeks in his warm, warm palms, pained eyes locking with yours. 
“Stay,” he whispers in a quiet coo, his forehead falling against yours, almost as if all the sincerity that lies in the world now lies within this simple, simple request. 
“Just stay...” He entreats, a tear rolling down his cheek as his thumbs swipe the trails of yours, his voice so defeated and weak, and yet it remains strong with adamance. 
“Stay with me, Y/N.” 
And as you feel his hands holding you so desperately, hear the shattered state of his voice, see the way he squeezes his eyes so tightly shut as though he were hoping this was all a nightmare, suddenly moves you to the ends of the Earth. 
It leaves you stunned. Taehyung deeply remembers that promise of yours, contemplating it may have meant just about everything to him, could’ve been something he held onto dearly and the fact that you were invalidating that promise, running at the first sign of trouble? 
It’s not what he deserved, and you knew Taehyung’s feelings were real. He wasn’t lying or fabricating anything. He genuinely, and wholly-heartedly loved you more than anything in the world, and you couldn’t stand to be the reason his heart breaks even further. 
You sniffle as you peer at him, hooking a hand onto his wrist. His eyes meet yours searching for something, anything from you to convince you, to beg you with everything his sad, sad heart has to offer. 
You brush your thumb against his warm skin, the smallest hint of a smile gracing your face.
“Okay,” you whisper back, eyes lightening up as you exhale deeply. “Okay.. Taehyung.” 
Taehyung’s entire body takes a breath of relief, settling down as his shoulders relax.
“Thank you.. thank you.” He shows his utmost gratitude, immediately engulfing you in his arms as he hugs you dearly. You embrace him back, having missed his arms and the warmth of his body, leaning into his strong frame. 
“We’re gonna do this together, okay?” Taehyung gives you an affirmative squeeze, speaking in his dulcet, honey-like voice. “I know this is hard, but you’re not alone, Princess. You have me and I have you. We’re gonna get through this together. I promise...” 
Taehyung’s supportive words despite just having his heart ripped out touches you, crumbling at just how much he disregards himself and always puts you first, always ensures you’re okay before he even considers his own well-being. It makes tears flood your vision, truly believing he’s the most amazing person you’ll ever know, and there’s just no way you could ever leave him. 
“Us against the world, Tae..” You sniffle as your weak voice utters, hugging him tighter than you ever have. Taehyung squeezes your smaller frame with his entire being, hoping to transfer all the love he has for you in a single touch, glad that no matter how broken your heart must be, he’s grateful it still beats.
“Us against the world, Princess.”
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Taehyung takes a deep breath. 
He adjusts the lapels of his suit as he once again prepares himself before entering what’s now coined the battlefield; or in simpler terms, work. 
It hasn’t necessarily been kind at all. He’s swamped with paperwork, his stocks are plummeting further than they ever have and reporters and the media alike are practically harassing him for interviews. 
He’s never felt so much anger his entire life. 
Though still, those trivial things aren’t what cloud his mind. As he clutches the sink and composes himself in the mirror of your shared bathroom, Taehyung can’t help but find himself revisiting the last two weeks that have transpired between you two. 
More specifically, you. 
Taehyung was alarmingly concerned for your wellbeing now, and it’s reaching a severe level. Your argument the other day led to a very important discussion between you two, finally figuring out that work has become a hellzone for you, and you needed to desperately leave. 
“Who the fuck dare treat you like this? Give me names, Princess. I’ll buy that company and fire all those motherfuckers. I always knew Alex was an asshole too.” 
“It’s okay, Tae. I think I just need to.. leave.” 
“You should, baby. My Princess doesn’t deserve this at all.” 
“I think I will, I can’t believe I work with such terrible people.” 
“I can’t even live with myself knowing you’re experiencing such awful things at work. I don’t want you in that hostile environment. Maybe I could find you a job at my company?” 
“It’s okay, Tae. I think for now it’s best I lay low and just stay home, it’s the only peace I know.” 
“I’m still worried about you, baby.” 
“I’ll be fine, Taehyung.” 
But you weren’t, not exactly, and Taehyung could tell you were slowly losing something within yourself. He didn’t want to believe that something was severely wrong with you. However, he’d soon realized it was the case when you stopped picking up his calls, and only scarcely texted him whenever you could.  
You stopped smiling, you stopped laughing. You didn’t even eat your kiwis Taehyung would always leave behind for you at breakfast, knowing how much you love them. You didn’t make your usual coffee in the morning anymore, nor really drink much of it at all. You didn’t step foot inside your studio, let alone design or even pick up your sketching pencil.
He even noticed odd moments of you standing in front of a mirror and almost.. inspecting yourself, scrutinizing yourself. Feeling at your body or peering at certain features for far longer than you should, until eventually, you stopped looking in any mirrors at all. 
You rarely ever watched TV nor did he find you perusing your phone, rather choosing to abandon it in your bedroom. He would often find you sleeping now, or locked up in your room with some tea, sometimes staring out your balcony window without a word escaping you. 
Things had gotten so severe you’d gradually, and slowly reduced the amount you spoke. You went from unenthusiastic answers, to non-committing noises until eventually, you stopped speaking altogether. 
You barely ate anything, Taehyung noticing the way you’d always brush him off about food, or lie about having already eaten. The only times Taehyung would get anything out of you were the long, long nights. 
And God, how terrible they were.
He’d frequently find you crying, either out on the balcony or simply in bed, and Taehyung felt as though he was being slowly, though excruciatingly tortured. His chest cinched with agony anytime he heard your cries, anytime the bed shook with your sobs and every time he heard your painful intakes for air. 
The nightmares were the worst, Taehyung subjected to waking up to your screams that always jolted him awake. He’d have to gently coo and soothe you until you’d fall back asleep, or hold your quivering figure in his arms until you found a peace of mind.
They soon turned into night terrors, too, and they were far worse when you didn’t find Taehyung in bed with you.
He scanned through papers working another late night in his study, glasses adorning his face as he diligently analyzed and strategized plans for the recent incidents at work. He tossed a pen onto his desk and reclined back on his couch with a tired sigh, fingers running through his disheveled hair. The back of his eyes ached with the need for sleep, but he only cracked his neck as he mustered the willpower to carry on. 
He can’t, however, because Taehyung hears the usual shrills at 1AM in the morning. He bursts through the bedroom door almost instantly, worry flooding his airway as he finds you clutching the covers to your thinly-dressed body. 
You’re loudly crying and hyperventilating, just like you usually were, and Taehyung speedily crawls onto the mattress as he shelters you in his arms. He pulls you in tight, squeezing your figure for dear life and hoping it rids you of the God awful shaking.
“Y/N, shh. It’s a dream, it’s just a dream.” He coos his routine words, feeling your body raked with shallow, quick breaths. “It’s not real, baby, it’s not real.” 
The sounds of your sobs ceasing relax him, tension lifting off his shoulder as he takes a deep breath, and strokes your back until you fall into a slumber again.  
Whether you’d recline on his shoulder, cuddle up in his lap or lay your head against his thigh in moments like this, Taehyung never minded, always silently, and gladly comforting you with his constant presence as much as you need. 
 It was the only thing Taehyung could offer anyway, himself. 
Every time you’d awaken with scared eyes and a panicking heart, he’d hold you and gently sing to you just to let you have some shut eye. Every time he’d find you up on your mattress and simply sobbing, he didn’t need to question it. He would sit up with you too and pull you into his lap, embracing you from behind. He would whisper to you that everything would be okay, that you would both find happiness together, until your cries eventually came to a silence. 
But Taehyung could tell something had changed in you. No, something had broken inside you. And he prayed to his angels every night that you’d be okay, that whatever’s so deeply troubling you would pass, that you’d find the power to heal. 
Even if you never elaborated on what’s wrong any time Taehyung asked, even if he didn’t hear your voice for a long, long time; he still hoped for the best of your well being. 
Still hoped that somewhere inside you, your soul wasn’t screaming in pain. 
Pain, it’s really all you felt. With a mix of regret, guilt, embarrassment. It just felt easier like this, to not say much of anything, to not talk. You couldn’t bring yourself to, not when all that swamped your cluttered mind were vile insults, hate, sheer guilt and regret. It was eating at you so profusely you couldn’t even think straight, couldn’t inhale a breath without feeling immense pain. 
You were eternally grateful for Taehyung, his loving, patient, gentle presence was the only strength you had to keep going. 
Taehyung had actually hired a lawyer to protect you and your image in the media. He wanted to create a safer environment for you, and took the necessary precautions for any future lawsuits especially after finding out about your workplace, and the intervention did in fact help you feel more at ease.
Though nothing could exactly repair the damage people had embedded inside you, too miserable to do anything, too sad to live the way you used to. 
You felt empty these days, as though your heart had been ripped out of your chest and withered away, now left a mere empty husk. A void shrouded your chest in perpetual darkness, the bile in your stomach constantly churning into the distasteful, bitter bubbling of agony. 
There was no strength in you to leave your bedroom some days, some days reading a book couldn’t keep you company. Some days eating was a task, some days Taehyung had to constantly bug you for a meal, even feeding you soup when you couldn’t muster the strength to lift your arms. 
He’d enlisted the help of the highest-rated psychiatrist in the city, desiring their expertise to get you the best of help and rightfully diagnosed. Your husband watched intently as Dr. Yang sat down with you on your bed, conversing with you through typing on a laptop and writing on a notepad. He examined a multitude of things; your mindset, your thoughts, what’s troubling you so deeply. You shed tears while writing to him and listening to his words, Taehyung’s soft holding of your hand having kept you afloat. 
“It’s a serious case of depression, dear.” He told you softly, a sympathetic smile adorning his face. “The events in your life have just.. hurt you very deeply.” 
You nodded as you understood, having known for a while now that was the case. Dr. Yang explained to a worried Taehyung that it would take you time to heal, and he couldn’t pinpoint timeframe of recovery considering this was a mental health issue. He also explained your inability to speak originates from the trauma of everything, and that speaking would only return to you naturally, over time as you heal. 
Dr. Yang then took your husband outside your room, and spoke to him about God knows what. You didn’t have much interest, and simply slinked back into your bed as you dozed off into a slumber, the feeling of your melancholy the only thing you remembered. 
Nothing changed about your behaviour at all as time passed, a routine for you to be like this. You hated putting all this pressure, work and burden on Taehyung, who would often return from chaotic days at his company to you, his sad and clinically depressed wife.
 Though you couldn’t find it in yourself to do anything about it. 
You couldn’t find it in yourself to do much of anything.  
You really do love Taehyung, you realized over the weeks of psychological torture. He was your rock, your anchor, the only pillar in your life that kept you from drowning. He’s the only reason you harbour any strength to keep moving forward, to stop the terrible, terrible thoughts haunting your mind.
Taehyung assisted you more frequently with any mundane tasks you couldn’t do by yourself; dressing yourself, brushing your hair, showering and bathing most days.
He undresses you now in your shared bathroom as you remain silent, unmoving as he takes the last of your garments off. He steps over to the bathtub and begins running the water, letting it fill up the tub as he rolls up the sleeves of his high-end, brand name dress shirt, and leans down to check the temperature of the water. 
He then looks over to you, standing with your arms crossed over your chest, listless and empty. He offers his hand. 
“Come, Princess. It’s warm.” he calls you gently.
You settle into the tub, Taehyung carefully helping you sit down. You’re submerged in the warm water as Taehyung removes the bath spray and checks the setting of the stream, seating himself on his stool by the edge of the bath. He begins gently dousing your hair with water. 
“Too warm?” He asks, and you give him a tentative shake of your head. He smiles to himself in the slightest, letting the water drown your hair as he delicately runs his fingers through your strands. 
It was the usual for you two like this; Taehyung trying his best to keep you and himself together while you remained a heavy burden on his shoulders. The thought alone made you clutch your knees to your chest, intaking a shaky breath to mask the feeling of sheer guilt that constantly washes over you. 
Your husband moved on to slathering shampoo in your hair, carefully working the soap through your locks as you silently let him, agonizingly drowning in the sorrows of your thoughts. 
With a sigh, you acknowledge Taehyung’s phone by the edge, your gaze falling to Taehyung above. His gorgeously handsome face catches you looking, and his eyes meet yours as he lightly tilts his head in question. “What’s wrong, angel?” 
You dry your hands on a towel before reaching over and grabbing his phone, unlocking it and accessing his notes. You linger over the screen, typing out a message. You then flash the screen to Taehyung with your innocent, doe eyes, Taehyung breathing a little laugh as he falls for them all over again. 
‘I have a question.’ 
Taehyung reads it, warm eyes flitting to you. “Go on, baby.” 
You type again, thumbs moving over the screen before showing your husband. 
‘Do you ever wonder what would've happened if you were successful running away from your family?’
Taehyung’s caught off guard, surprised by the sudden inquiry. He purses his lips as he thinks, his contemplative eyes falling to yours for where this is coming from, though answers nonetheless. 
“I don’t know,” Taehyung says simply, his soapy hands now dormant in your hair. “All I know is if I ran away.. I would’ve never met you.”
Taehyung sees the comment leaves you with indistinguishable emotions, swallowing before your little thumbs conjure up more text, Taehyung leaning in to read it. 
His heart sinks.
‘Maybe you would’ve been better without me.’
He sighs as his chest feels a sting he can’t remedy, wetting his lips. He simply reaching over and presses a long, deep kiss to your forehead, pecking another gentle before he grabs the bath spray, and turns it on as he offers you a wholesome smile.
“Let’s get you cleaned up, sweetheart.” 
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Error. 
“What the fuck?” 
Error. Error. 
“Why won’t this stupid thing..?” 
Error. Error. Error.
“Oh fucking..” Taehyung immediately rises from his seat as his annoyance boils over, bursting out of his office and towards Mrs. Lee’s desk with a frustrated huff.
“Mrs. Lee, my computer isn't letting me send an email to my wife. Could you please try to send it?” 
Mrs. Lee contorts her lips. “Really, Mr. Kim? That’s quite odd.” 
“Right? I’ve been trying to send the information of this company in search of a head architect to her, but for some reason I can’t send her anything.” Taehyung laments. 
“Hmm, that’s very strange. You could forward the email to me and I’ll try sending it myself, Mr. Kim.” Taehyung nods affirmatively and whips out his phone, sending the documented email to Mrs. Lee and she receives it just fine. 
Taehyung and Mrs. Lee both note that Taehyung’s email is working properly, understanding it must be yours causing the trouble. Mrs. Lee drafts her forwarding and searches your email, clicking the send button and finding the same error appearing. 
“See? I don’t understand why her personal email doesn’t work.” 
“Has Mrs. Kim not told you anything about her email? Possibly changing it?” Mrs. Lee queries him. 
Taehyung instantly feels a sting of pain, revisiting the last weeks he’s been with you. “She.. hasn’t really been talking much.. at all.” Taehyung admits, his demeanour clouded with a grey colour, and Mrs. Lee softens. 
“I have her friend Yeji’s phone number for emergency purposes. Would you like me to call her? She could possibly know what happened to Mrs. Kim’s email.” 
“That’s a great idea. Thank you, Mrs. Lee.” 
Mrs. Lee makes a gesture as though to not mention it, immediately softing for the contact and calling your ex co-worker. Taehyung watches Mrs. Lee converse with her over the phone, not really able to make out much of the conversation. 
He waits for his secretary to finish, watching her place her phone down as he nibbles on his lip nervously, tapping his foot to distract himself. “So?” 
“Apparently Mrs. Kim deleted her email, Mr. Kim.” Taehyung knits his brows together, confusion riddling all his features. 
“What?” 
“Her ex co-worker informed me she deleted her email. She’s unsure herself as to why and hasn’t been able to contact Mrs. Kim through text or call either.” 
Taehyung’s puzzled as all hell, tonguing his cheek as he contemplates the new information. “Deleted her email? Why would my wife delete her email..?” Taehyung asks himself as he attempts to piece together an answer.
Mrs. Lee begins clicking at her keyboard as well, Taehyung trying to sort through his thoughts though keeps getting distracted by the clicking noises. 
“Mrs. Lee, what are you doing?” 
“I’m just doing a quick search of Mrs. Kim on the internet to see...” And Mrs. Lee freezes, her finger having stopped scrolling and her face stunned as she peers at her screen. 
Taehyung questions eagerly. “What? What is it?” 
“Mr. Kim..” Mrs. Lee beckons Taehyung over to her, and he quickly rounds her pristine desk to settle by her side, scanning over her screen. 
And what he sees leaves him absolutely horrified. 
Taehyung’s privy to hundreds of comments on an article about your relationship with him, not any different from the usual self-acclaimed scandal articles discrediting your marriage. Though it’s a specific comment not only spewing vile hate towards you, but also leaking your personal email that alarms Taehyung. 
“Holy shit..” 
“Mr. Kim, if your wife’s email was leaked like this then..” 
“Oh my God.” Taehyung immediately goes into panic mode, already reaching a new height of concern as he reads the God awful words people had to say about you. Insults, rumours, gossip, completely untrue and false statements regarding you, but seeing your personal email up in the air like that is what sends him into overdrive.
He can’t even imagine the terrible things you must be receiving, though another daunting thought then suddenly pops into his mind. 
If they could get a hold of your email, what else could they have gotten a hold of? 
Taehyung’s brain goes haywire, immediately shoving his phone into his pocket and making a break for his elevator down the hall, hollering back to Mrs. Lee. 
“Mrs. Lee, cancel all my meetings, I have something important to do!” 
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Taehyung settles onto the bed comfortably, snapping a glance at the door to ensure you hadn’t somehow snuck up on him, despite having come home to you sleeping angelically in the main area downstairs. 
He kissed your forehead as an apology before scampering his way upstairs, having swiped your phone from the nightstand to do something he swore to himself he would never do. 
Break into your phone. 
It feels like a ghastly invasion of privacy, but Taehyung knows just how important this is. 
He taps open your phone, cracking a smile at the cute wallpaper you’d kept. It was the same selca you’d taken together with his newly-gifted Leica camera in Greece; arm clutching you tightly as his nose and lips pressed to your cheek with his own bread-cheek smile, and you’re happily grinning.
He encountered your password screen then, bypassing easily remembering his birthday is the 4-digit code. He accesses your home page and lingers over the many apps you have, deciding first to maybe visit social media. 
Taehyung couldn’t bear the thought of you hiding things from him. Suffering all alone the hurtful things coming your way considering the nasty comments on just one article. 
Is this what’s been troubling you so deeply, Princess?
And what drove you to delete your entire personal email? It didn’t make sense to him, needing more information. 
He thinks you must’ve backed up the data of your old email considering how often you used it, especially for exchanging your designs and work you created digitally. 
Fingertips typing away, he finds your stored email data and opens up the files, expecting to see designs and your work riddled all over the folders, only to be clutching his palm to his mouth. 
Taehyung’s disgusted by the amount of horrid images he sees, the graphic content of hateful messages saved as well. He’s disturbed to the core, immediately clicking off the content as his features twist into disapproval. 
‘What the fuck?’ Is all Taehyung can think. Is that why you deleted your email?
Taehyung feels anger boil within him, moving to delete the images and content before he receives a text from a random number, clicking to reveal the content, and only finds the beginning of a very graphic death threat. Taehyung’s utterly nonplussed, disbelieving that even your text messages are littered with random numbers that have either sent or texted terrible things. 
He scrambles for your social media and finds that you’ve logged out of most applications. He pensively wonders your passwords and remembers you mentioning that all of them are the same. He begins a guessing game of combination words and numbers then.
Taehyung knows you like the back of his hand, and for fun attempts to input the full date of his birthday with his initials, surprisingly getting in. 
Despite the situation, he chuckles a little. 
He bypasses your social media and finds what should be your private accounts flooded with hate messages and comments. Taehyung reads over some and only finds malicious content that infuriates him, letting out a disappointed sigh.
His protective senses immediately overtake him, waiting to deny every person spewing bullshit about you, only to be frustrated knowing that he can’t do much of anything. He only knows as soon as possible, he’s completely revamping your contact information; new number, new email, new phone for fuck’s sake. His lawyer is definitely getting wind of this and he will be pressing charges for defamation. 
He swears on his life he won’t rest until he sees people paying for this. 
Taehyung sighs as he leans back against the bed, feeling incredibly guilty, exhausted, running through the vicious, cruel things people are saying about you. 
Is this what you have to read? Is this what you wake up to in the morning? 
Taehyung reads the last disgusting comment, and he intakes a breath as he sets a goal for tonight, the goal he’s determined will come to fruition. 
Because if there’s one thing to be known about Taehyung, is that once his mind’s set on something, he’s not a man to be deterred.
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A nightmare again, Taehyung thinks. 
He lays in bed as he attempts to catch some shut-eye, though heard the sheets rustling as your body remains restless in bed. You face the balcony as Taehyung peers at your back, watching the way you move around in distress, the faster sounds of your breathing. He feels his chest ache.
Taehyung naturally slips his arm around your waist as he shuffles closer to you, pulling you into his warm embrace. He squeezes you tightly, lips nuzzling into your neck as he lays soft kisses. He feels the way your body relaxes, breaths becoming steadier, and he sees your precious eyes flutter open. 
He cards his hand through your hair to see you better, lips pressed to your temple. “Y/N..” he whispers, and though he doesn’t receive an answer, he knows you hear him. 
“Are you awake?” Is what he quietly asks, and he feels you nod, nestling into his arms closer, hugging him around you. 
Taehyung bites his lip as his mind races. The last time you’ve both had sex was weeks ago, and he didn’t know how willing you and your body would be in a fragile, vulnerable state like this. But after sensing the sheer amount of tension in your body after all that’s happened, considering all the thoughts that probably storm around in your mind, he comes to his assured conclusion. 
His lips kiss your temple before finding your neck again, Taehyung dipping inside the crook for slow pecks. The noises of his mouth leaving those kisses fill your ears with music, your own personal symphony as you relish in the softness of his lips. 
His hand begins to travel higher, steadily sliding up until his palm gingerly tightens around one of your breasts, letting out a sound akin to a moan. He lightly begins to fondle, feeling at the flesh. It’s almost as though he’s watching your reactions, testing them out before he ventures any further. 
“Is this okay?” he whispers.
You nod to him shyly, feeling your body welcome the touch.
The mix of his hand fondling you and his lips kissing your neck elicit your soft sounds of pleasure, instinctively leaning your body back into his. Taehyung puffs hot air into your ear once your ass meets his crotch, nibbling on your earlobe. 
“You’re so beautiful, Y/N,” he breathes, and means it from the bottom of his heart as he watches the moonlight bounce off your supple cheek. “Love touching your body.”
You bite your lip to manage the arousal sparking through you. Taehyung hooks his fingers onto the neckline of your nightgown, slowly tugging it down to expose a tit. You gasp when his large, masculine hand suddenly cups you, nipple brushing against his palm. His fingertips soon greet you too, rolling the small nub between them. 
“So pretty when you moan, baby,” he praises, the sound of his dulcet, baritone voice vibrating in your ear. “My pretty girl.” 
Taehyung switches his hands, and allows one to knead your bare breast as the other slowly snakes down your stomach, long fingers reaching your abdomen. Taehyung props himself up on his elbow behind you, biting back a groan at your pliant body. 
His fingertips canvas lower, hovering above your pulsing cunt. 
“Can I?” He breathes, and you nod faintly
Eyes shut in pleasure, you indulge in his masterful hand groping your breast. Taehyung proceeds with the other and slowly hikes up your nightgown, presenting your panty-clad core to him. He first slides his hand over your naked thigh, pressing the softest of kisses to your cheek as he strokes your beautiful skin. 
“Such a pretty body, you know that?” Taehyung coos with another delicate kiss. “Always love what I see.” 
A small whimper escapes you once his fingertips glide towards the inside of your leg, stroking your inner thigh in almost teasing touches. You shift further back on Taehyung as you request for more, and he gladly grants you your wishes. 
He sneaks up to your panties and cups your sex in his palm, moaning quietly at the electrifying, searing feeling. He begins soft circles over your pussy that ignite your bones, the slow, tender movements of his hand suddenly everything you needed. 
“My wife is so gorgeous.. so beautiful.” Taehyung kisses the corner of your mouth, one hand playing with your nipple as the other toys with your folds through your dampening underwear. You hear a hiss from Taehyung as he touches you deeper.
“So wet, baby.” He takes your ear lobe between his teeth for a soft bite. “Love your wet pussy.” 
You grow restless with arousal in your spot, squishing his hand between your thighs to manage the sinful movement, but Taehyung only pries your legs open. He simultaneously slips past the barrier of your underwear and begins touching you bare down there, cunt flaring up the second you feel his fingers.
A gasp escapes, shoving your face into your pillow and gripping the sheets hard, managing the pleasure spiking all across your body. 
“Fuck, so hot.” Taehyung breathes, the heat of him behind you so intoxicatingly hot. “So sexy, Princess.” 
He bites your ear again before rubbing his middle finger over your clit, drawing patterns over the sensitive bud. You shiver, walls clenching around virtually nothing. Taehyung adds his pointer finger and begins stimulating your pussy in the spot he knows all too well, listening to the sound of you hissing wildly. 
He hums in satisfaction, letting out hot puffs of air himself as he readjusts behind you and presses his cock against your backside. He improves his position and begins picking up speed with his fingers, rapidly moving over your sex and feeling you leak all over his hand. 
“Dripping wet, baby. Just love when I touch you, huh?” You nod to him as you bite your lip, small whimpers escaping you as pleasure floods your stomach, the familiar fluttering of your walls and guts welcoming an oncoming high. 
Taehyung latches his mouth onto your neck, laying open-mouthed kisses all over your pulse point. He sucks the skin sensually once kisses aren’t enough, his three-way stimulation overriding your senses. You moan and gasp as you indulge in his ministrations, adopting a rhythm of rutting with his body behind you that’s now driven you insane. 
Your husband seems the same, whispering curse words and praises into your ear as he relishes in the feeling of fondling your body, the sensation of your squirming for more. He grows too turned on, the press of his cock against your ass cheek fuelling the dirtiest of thoughts within your mind. 
“Do you want me inside, angel?” Taehyung asks as though he reads your thoughts, showing you the utmost, tender love and care in the world. His passionate neck kisses, his hand caressing your nipple and fingers treating your clit, all combine to create a peaceful, euphoric environment for you—where only pleasure exists. 
You nod to him as confirmation, and Taehyung quickly shuffles down his boxers and frees his thick cock, feeling the hard flesh practically slap against your ass. Taehyung sneaks it between your legs, your essence having coated much of your pulsing pussy.
His cock is met by the slick of your warm cunt, Taehyung moaning into your ear once he feels just how much honey you’re dripping. You gasp as well, the feeling of his meaty cock sliding between your folds head-spinning. 
“Deep breath for me, baby.” Taehyung encourages sweetly, and you inhale deeply as he simultaneously pushes in his cock inside your velvet sex. You let out harmonized moans, the wet drag of him slipping right in melting into your two bodies. 
Taehyung hugs both arms around your waist and begins slowly, carefully pumping himself inside your slippery walls, feeling the way you squeeze his cock, your soft moans his very own ecstasy. He groans at the fit of your tight pussy. 
“So tight, baby.” He dips down to kiss your neck again, craning it to grant him better access. “The best pussy ever.” 
You gasp at the slow drag of Taehyung’s fat length, slowly driving himself in and out, the rhythmic steadiness of his thrusts downright intoxicating. Your stomach fills with butterflies when he shoves himself particularly deep, indulging in the way your cunt traps him inside. 
“God, Princess..” He groans, maneuvering himself around as though your heat were his home. You shudder in his arms, softly moaning as your fingers grip onto his forearm. “Just so pretty, so fucking pretty.”
The need for more increases as Taehyung fucks you nice and slow, lazily, as though there was no hurry in the world and he could spend a millennium simply fucking you just like this. You let out an indulgent moan, hand jutting back to grasp his hip and pulling him towards you for more. 
Taehyung reads your sign, breathing hotly into your ear. “I’m gonna have to lift your leg for that, yeah?” 
You nod incessantly, feeling Taehyung’s palm curl underneath your leg and elevate it, granting him more space to fuck as he begins an improved speed. Taehyung sheaths his cock inside you a little harder and faster as his other arm still cradles your body, holding you in place as he thrusts into your dripping sex. 
Eyes fluttering shut and open, pleasure speckles across your skin as the added spread and intensity tighten your walls, the delicious penetration of his cock sickening. You lay on your back a little and face up to find Taehyung’s hung open lips and a sheen of sweat coating his forehead, no doubt from working himself into your pussy. 
A hand of yours landing against his cheek transfers his vision from his cock slamming into your pussy to your face below, gladly able to see your fucked out expression and parted lips exhaling breaths. 
“There’s my pretty girl.” He coos with a small smile, scanning your every feature as though he desires to memorize each one, embed every cut and curve into his mind to view even after he dies. 
His throbbing, elongated dick drives into your sex as you feel your lungs fill with air and lose it, each thrust of his somehow rocking your world every glorious time. And your eyes locking with each other only increases the temperature, the passion, the sheer heat of your bodies radiating against each other. 
He dips down and connects your lips for a nearly lethal kiss, drunk off the feeling of him working his mouth against yours, swallowing you up. The combination of him shoving his tongue down your throat and similarly his cock into your heat drives you insane, breaths hitching repeatedly as you grind against him. 
Taehyung pops off your mouth, and he can see in your eyes there’s curiosity there. Questions floating around in your head as you contemplate why he’s doing this, why he’s suddenly treating you to all this pleasure, and Taehyung commits another act of telepathy. 
His forehead falls against yours gently, a stark contrast to his hips slapping against your ass, drilling your pussy as he lifts your leg higher for better access. 
“Because I love you, Y/N.” He says, eyes only on you. “I just love you. My beautiful wife.. with her gorgeous body.” It’s as though the passion and sincerity in his words leak into his thrust, Taehyung fucking you faster as he feels your walls tighten harder. Your breaths clip, and the nails previously against his cheek falter to his neck and dig into his skin. 
“The prettiest eyes.. the cutest nose.. the softest cheeks.” He goes on and on, pressing small kisses to your face as he showers you in affection, so soft and tender you could’ve melted into a puddle. “My baby’s so pretty.” 
Slapping sounds resonate in the room as Taehyung increases his speed once more, picking it up a notch once your breaths begin to hitch quicker and your fingers grip him like a lifeline. He watches your pleasured out features as his cock slides in and out, indulging in the tight fit of your pussy like the perfect cocksleeve. 
“God, I love you.” Taehyung confesses, his own breath harsh and uneven with pleasure. “My pretty wife.. so perfect just the way she is.” 
Your heart melts, and you feel so touched tears brim your eyes, emotion catching your throat. The amount of love and warmth in this simple interaction brightens up the dark, dark places inside you. Those flowers that had withered away in your chest gradually see hope for better days, and it’s all because of your loving husband. 
“I love you, Y/N. I love everything about you..” Taehyung speaks between hard and deep thrusts, his voice thick with emotion. “Your scars, your faults, your cuts and bruises. Everything, baby, everything you hate.. they’re beautiful to me.” 
You can’t help it, tears escape your eyes as you grip the collar of his shirt and tug him towards you, needing him closer, needing him right there in that one spot inside you and Taehyung ups the ante, fucking harder into your cunt with heated passion. 
Taehyung makes love like no other, hooking your leg between his to hold you open, while he snakes down to your pulsing clit and begins rubbing circles all over the bud, gasping loudly at the intoxicating touch. Your eyes could’ve rolled back, but you wanted to focus on Taehyung’s beautiful coffee eyes, the moonlight illuminating their true hue of honey. 
But his hand on you is so dangerously good, you’re falling into the abyss of his perfect ministrations, fucking and touching you just like you wanted to be.
“Are you gonna cum, baby?” 
You nod, tears cascading down your face as the pleasure of his cock and the emotions brewing within your heart do you in. Taehyung continues to touch your sex as he stimulates your clit, rubbing tight patterns over the slippery pearl as your walls flutter around his thick cock. 
“Cum, my pretty girl.” He kisses your nose, breaths running rampant as he begins stimulating your nipple as well, ramming himself into your pussy. “Love watching you cum.. wanna see you cum.” 
The passionate fucking and quick rubbing all amalgamate into a wondrous orgasm, lips falling open as a mewl and whimper escape you. Your chest rises and falls as your pussy walls hug Taehyung’s cock indefinitely, a warm, tight fit Taehyung can’t help but adore. He feels you calm down as he rubs out your release, letting you ride his hand and cock for more until oversensitivity taints your guts. 
He removes his hand and to your surprise, also pulls himself out very slowly. You grip his shirt and shoot him a look of questioning, eyebrows furrowing. 
“Don’t worry about me, angel.” He simply says, with a whole-heartedly content smile on his face. “I can take care of myself.” 
But you want his cum, you want him to chase his pleasure just as much as he supplied you yours, and you grip him back harder in place as you scrunch your eyebrows harder. He chuckles softly at the image, brushing some hair from your flushed face as he presses a peck to your lips, gazing into your eyes. 
“Don’t wanna mess up your pretty pussy.” 
You still flash him a concerned look, and Taehyung simply softens as he kisses you another time, instead settling himself behind you into a laid position as he pulls up his boxers. He readjusts the blankets over you, tucking you in and pulling you snug against his back, spooning you comfortably. He kisses your hair as he indulges in the scent of your shampoo, transferring all his warmth into your body as he fixes your gown and panties. 
“Sleep, my Princess.” He whispers, feeling your body become heavy with sleep, wondering when you had felt so much.. Lighter? Was it the sex? You couldn’t tell, you were too sleepy to think. “I’ll see you in the morning.” 
And you indeed did fall asleep in Taehyung’s arms like a baby that night, your husband rejoicing at the thought that this may have supplied you even the smallest bit of happiness.
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Taehyung's feet felt heavy, walking towards his home as if he were a zombie. He lugged himself inside, trudging tiredly as he removed his shoes from another gruesome day at work. He sighs greatly as he slips into his house slippers, though finds a smile etching onto his lips when he remembers the passionate love of last night. 
The sounds of your moans burn into his brain, the images of him touching your body and the desperate grip of your hand on his neck. Taehyung rubs the red trails your nails left behind, the subtle sting there, but it’s a hot reminder that last night was real. 
Taehyung blinks profusely to dissipate the flashes of your clipping breaths and whimpers, stepping inside his grand residence. He spots Mrs. Choi and Seo working away in the kitchen, perking up as he stalks over to the marble counter and musters up the courage to ask the questions he always does. 
“Mrs. Choi, Seo.. did she speak today?” 
They both presented Taehyung with sad looks, shaking their heads. “No, Mr. Kim.” one of them answered. 
Taehyung nodded as though he didn’t really expect another answer. “Did she eat anything?” 
“Only some crackers and soup as usual, Mr. Kim. She’s still the same.” They both offered their most sympathetic smiles, wanting to lay it easy on Taehyung, though nothing could truly keep him from the pain he feels, anyway. 
He gives them a comprehensive nod, treading off glumly to his study in hopes of completing some work. It was simply routine for him now to hear those answers, a new normal he didn’t know could still hurt him so terribly. He plops down in his study chair. He leans back in it as he runs his hands over his face with exhaustion, taking a frustrated sigh. 
He didn’t know what to do, everything just seemed so.. normal now, that it was normal to see you like this. A solution seemed too out of reach and your condition irreparable, as though any effort he made wouldn’t change anything. 
He earns a notification on his phone for the front door in all his thinking, sliding left to open up his security system, alarming him of a presence outside his door. He finds a friend visiting him, having forgotten he was supposed to come by today. 
Taehyung doesn’t remember much of anything these days.  
He opens the door to reveal his best friend, Jimin greeting him with a hearty embrace. He hands Taehyung what looks to be a care package afterwards. 
“Oh? What’s this, Jimin?” 
“It’s for you and Y/N. Well, mostly Y/N. My.. betrothed? Almost-fiance? Whatever, we both kinda assembled it together.” Jimin laughs, Taehyung lightening up at the sight of his eye smile. 
“It’s got both your favourite snacks in them and gift cards to all kinds of places. There’s self-care stuff for the both of you and I even got Y/N this special Chamomile tea that could maybe help her sleep.” Taehyung feels grateful as he accepts the gift, giving Jimin another tight hug as he swallows down his overbearing emotions. 
“Thank you, Jimin. Thank you so much.” 
“Never mention it, man.”
Taehyung shuts the door and allows Jimin to enter, stepping into the main area as he removes his jacket. “Hey, have you been getting the guys’ calls, Tae? They’ve been texting and leaving voicemails.” 
Taehyung purses his lips as his grip on the basket tightens, exhaling a sigh. “I have but.. I don’t feel like talking to anyone really.” 
Jimin nods, understanding his friend. “It’s alright, whenever you’re comfortable. They’re just really worried for you both, I’ll send them your regards.” 
Taehyung sends a tight-lipped smile as he makes his way towards the kitchen, Jimin’s eyes scanning over the main floor. “Where’s Y/N? I wanted to see how she’s doing.” 
“She’s in our room,” Taehyung gestures as he points upstairs, setting down Jimin’s gift basket on his counter. “Let me take you to her.” 
Jimin waves a kind greeting to Taehyung’s housekeepers, following him up the steps.
Taehyung carefully opens the door to your bedroom as he meanders in, letting Jimin follow him but making as little noise as possible considering you may be asleep. 
And to his best guess, Taehyung finds you soundlessly slumbering in your bed, tucked into the covers like a little angel as your body rises and falls. Taehyung smiles slightly as he peers at your endearing position, always having slept like a baby. 
“She’s asleep, Jimin. I’m sorry.” Taehyung whispers to Jimin who stands not too far, his friend immediately waving him off. 
“It’s okay, she needs her sleep.” Taehyung grins as his eyes fall to your adorably puffed cheeks, hands in his pockets. 
“How.. is she these days?” Jimin asks tentatively. 
Taehyung shrugs, sending his friend a wishy-washy expression, eyes vacant. “Managing.. I guess.” 
Jimin grows a little sad, a gloominess casting over the room. “Do you think she’s getting any better?” 
“I’m not really sure,” Taehyung explains. “She doesn’t really sleep at night because of the nightmares.. and most of the time she doesn’t eat.. nor leave her bed.”
“How are you both?” 
“We’re good, we’re fine..” Taehyung toes the ground. 
“Are you guys okay intimately and stuff..?” 
“Yeah, I’ve just been taking care of her, whatever she needs.”  Taehyung replies. “We’ve had sex but only a couple times, I don’t wanna push her body.” 
“No, I get that. I’m really glad you’re both doing well at least.” Jimin speaks quietly, a smile on his lips. “Well, actually very well.” 
Taehyung shoots him a confused furrow of his eyebrows. “Hm?”
Jimin gestures at his own neck with his nails, replicating the image of someone scratching him. 
Taehyung has an ah-hah moment and his hand curls around the scratch marks littering his pulse point, cracking the smallest of smiles. “Told you she’s a scratcher.” 
The two friends chuckle a little as Taehyung rubs the trails, before his vision falls back to you. 
He inhales painfully as he watches, feeling his heart tighten. “She’s here.. is what I’m glad for.” 
Jimin sends Taehyung a sympathetic smile, hooking a hand onto his shoulder supportively. “She’ll get through this, Tae. Y/N’s a strong one.. and you’re strong too.” 
Taehyung sends a half-smile before his eyes find you again.
He steps towards you, trying to make minimal noise as his gentle hand falls against your hair, running through the soft strands as he admires you. He kneels down by the edge of your bed, and presses soft kisses to your face. He meets your lips and plants a deep, longing kiss, pulling away and letting his thumb stroke your temple. 
Jimin watches with a warm heart at the scene, considering how much his friend is truly in love, just how much you mean to him. 
Taehyung rises as he decides to let you sleep, leading Jimin out of your room and leaving the door open a crack. He redirects Jimin to his study where they’ve both opened Taehyung’s bottle of Crown Royal. He already found himself halfway through it as he confided in his best friend, growing progressively more drunk as he relayed his sorrows. 
“D’you know he told me the only thing he can do is prescribe pills? Fucking anti-depressants?” Taehyung’s speech slurs as he pins down a glass against the desk in his study, scoffing when he recalled the information Dr. Yang told him about your diagnosis. “Fucking anti-depressants, Jimin. As if I’d let my wife take those life-draining-ass pills.” 
“He didn’t suggest therapy or anything else?” Jimin asks as he holds onto a glass, not having filled it with alcohol as frequently as his friend did. 
Taehyung lazily poured himself another shot of whiskey, practically spilling some over as his deliriously miserable mind brewed. Jimin grows concerned and pries the bottle out of his friend's hand, letting Taehyung at least bring the glass to his mouth. 
“No.. he said therapy can’t work right now ‘cause she’s stopped talking.” Taehyung sniffles after he downs his liquor in one swig. His glossy eyes stare at his glass as he brings it down, thumbing the intricate pattern. A moment of silence passes, Taehyung exhaling tiredly. 
“I just wanna hear her voice again, you know?” His pained, quiet voice is heart-breaking, and Jimin sighs as he listens to his drunk, downcast friend. “I’m starting to forget what she sounds like.. Jimin. Do you know how fucked up that is?” 
Jimin frowns as he watches his friend try to hold back tears, rimming his shot glass without much precision. 
“I’m really sorry about this, Tae. You and Y/N never deserved this.” 
Taehyung swallows as his throat clogs up, leaning back in his seat as his finger poked at the glass. “The last time I heard her laugh was on our trip in Greece,” he says with a smile that’s nowhere near happy, suddenly remembering the pretty sound of your giggle, wondering how much longer he must go until he can hear it again. 
“I had one job, Jiminie.” Taehyung grips the glass as he broods. “I just had to make her happy as her husband; take care of her, give her a good life.. and I can’t even fucking do that.” 
“No way, Tae,” Jimin immediately stops his friend, latching onto his hand to speak seriously. “Taehyung, you make Y/N immensely happy, okay? She may be in this state right now, but you’ve been taking amazing care of her and I know she’s happiest when she’s with you. Haven’t you ever considered maybe you’re the only reason she’s still holding on?” 
Taehyung’s eyes flicker to Jimin, the smallest bit of hope flashing in them once he sees the sincerity. “You really think so?” 
“I know so, Tae.” Jimin states matter-of-factly. “I think she’s always had a good life with you, and I think for as long as you’ve known her you’ve made her happy. None of this is your fault, man.” 
Taehyung’s empty expression shows he understands Jimin’s sentiment, but nothing could quiet the storm in his heart. He just felt so lost, so hopelessly broken he couldn’t contain it anymore. For weeks he’s tried to compose himself, to be the strong one in your relationship, keep you afloat as each day threatens to drown you. 
But little did you know, Taehyung was close to drowning himself. 
Work had him in shambles, attempting to defuse the many situations the supposed scandal had caused, not to mention dealing with his now tainted reputation. His parents hadn’t spoken to him either since that conversation in his father’s study, his mother having only called him to check up a couple times after the allegations of his violent past.
His family didn’t take that news well at all.  
Other than that, Taehyung has been shouldering everything himself. He’s been suffocating ever since, having carried the weight of it all until his back physically hurt. Taehyung was being tried and tested, pushed and pulled until he felt himself slowly tearing apart, something dying inside him. 
“I can’t do this.. Jiminie.” His voice broke, the pain in his chest, the state of his heart too fragile. “I just can’t.” 
Taehyung accesses his video on his phone, clicking on the one snapshot that he always found himself revisiting in his darkest of moments. He presses play and watches the video of you drunk on his chest, putting up the volume because it’s the only source of your laughter he has, the only source of his composure. 
“Why can’t things just be like this.. Jimin?” Taehyung flashes his friend the screen, showing him the video as Jimin watches his friend crumble. 
“Why did this have to happen.. why did he have to hurt her?” Taehyung couldn’t even find it in himself to sob or entirely break down, only feeling the type of sadness where it gets caught in his throat and makes his head ache, tears silently spilling from the corners of his eyes. 
“It’s so hard, Jimin.. It’s so hard seeing her like that everyday.. every fucking day. I can’t do it anymore.” 
Jimin bites back his own tears as he watches Taehyung in such anguish. Although he doesn’t possess the power to exactly help his friend’s pain, his words are his only offering. “I know, Taehyung. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” 
“I don’t know how much longer I can do this.. it’s just so much.. I’m feeling all this pain and emotion and it’s too much.” Taehyung sets his phone down and attempts to breathe properly, tears silently leaving his vulnerable eyes. 
“I think what you need is some closure, Tae.” Jimin speaks up, clutching his friend’s hand supportively as he advises him. “Look, I know you already beat Hisung’s ass for screwing with Y/N but maybe.. maybe you need to convey that what he did was wrong without your anger, finally settle things with him to find some peace within yourself.” 
Taehyung’s eyes flit to Jimin, surprised by his friend’s instruction. Jimin smiles a little, understanding Taehyung’s stress. “I think you’re very frustrated and angry, Tae. I think you still find this situation completely unfair, and you need to find some closure with the situation.” 
Jimin straightens up as he seriously speaks to Taehyung, presenting a healing opportunity. “Maybe speaking to Hisung could help. Let him know that this rivalry.. this petty back and forth is something you can’t tolerate anymore, especially after hurting someone who means so much to you.” 
Taehyung wipes away his tears as he absorbs Jimin’s words, finding his eyes with some positivity. “Do you think it could help?” 
“Of course it will, Tae.” Jimin reassures him. “If you let him know how you feel, and how terribly wrong it was for him to do this, I think you’ll at least be able to let go of your frustration. Work through that anger, find the strength to keep moving forward, focus on Y/N and her mental health instead of feeling like this. You’ll have less on your plate that way.”  
Taehyung nods as he sniffles, seeing the reason in Jimin’s words. “I think.. that’s great advice, Jimin. Thank you.” 
“I told you, Tae,” Jimin pats his hand good-naturedly. “You never have to mention it with me.” 
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Taehyung stands before the doors of Hisung’s office, having been able to luckily catch him. 
He pulls open the door after a pensive second, clearing his throat as he steps inside. Hisung swivels around in his chair, and Taehyung watches as his eyes widen in complete surprise. Taehyung finds the man with a small bandage still over his pretty fucked up nose, though it seems to be healing.
“Hisung.” 
“Kim.” 
“Your nose looks ugly as fuck.” 
“Says the jackass who did it.” 
Taehyung scoffs as he tongues his cheek, hands in his pockets. His eyes flit around the space to subdue the rage he feels even seeing the bastard right now, jaw locking.
“The fuck are you doing here, Kim?” 
Taehyung exhales sharply, he already feels like kicking his face in. He bunches up his fists in his pockets before he takes a breath, remembering the instructions you once gave him to simply breathe through his anger, to cool down in a healthy way. 
“I’ll get to the point,” Taehyung begins. “I’m using every ounce of my self-control right now to not shatter all your bones.. especially after what you did to Y/N.”
Hisung shifts in his seat as his elbows reach his desk, opening his mouth for what Taehyung knew to be a snarky remark, but cuts him off. “But, that’s not what I’m here for. I’m here for Y/N.” 
Hisung rolls his eyes, clearly uninterested. “And what about your little wife, Kim?” 
“I think you owe her an apology.” 
Hisung furrows his brows, acutely confused. “And why the hell would I do that?” 
“Do you seriously not see the fault in what you did, Hisung?” Taehyung speaks argumentatively. “She’s feeling pain right now.. this awful pain she doesn’t deserve because of you.” Taehyung stresses pointedly. “This rivalry or whatever we have.. it needs to end. I’m done playing these games, I’m done entertaining your hatred.” 
“It’s not really my issue, Kim. Whatever happened to your wife isn’t my fault. All I did was expose something that should’ve been known.” 
“But you did it to hurt me.. and you instead hurt somebody that never deserved to be hurt in the first place.” Taehyung explains seriously. “You need to stop acting like we’re teenagers, we’re fucking grown adults, Hisung.” 
“Even as adults you still do the same shit, Kim. Always walking around on your high horse thinking you’re superior with your Kim reputation, do you really think this is just about when we were in highschool?” Hisung argues. “You took everything away from me when you fucking swayed my shareholders!” 
Taehyung feels fury boil under his skin, growing angry over the same narrative that Hisung constantly spreads. His hands tighten into fists by his side, though this time, Taehyung finds it in himself to rather relax, to subtract his emotions from this conversation and carry on with a clear head. 
“I know that’s what you think, Hisung. And I could tell you a million times I didn’t do it with you never believing me. But I hope you know when I say this, I mean this man to man, human being to another.” Taehyung gestures between them both. 
“You truly did something terrible. You did wrong by someone completely innocent. You’ve taken her life and now caused a wound you, me, nobody else can heal. So please, find it in yourself to understand.. to understand that fucking hurting people to get to me is wrong, that you need to let whatever vendetta you have against me go.” 
Hisung seems to almost absorb Taehyung’s comment, though quickly responds with aloofness instead. “Don’t lecture me on the fucking good human will, Kim. Go back to your wife.” 
Taehyung sighs as he realizes his efforts may not have gotten him far, though feels at least satisfied he’s gotten to say everything he could. He steps towards the doors of Hisung’s office, opening them as he makes his way out, though doesn’t leave without saying what he needs most. 
“Hisung, I never knew I made you feel that way when we were friends, I never meant to make you live in my shadow.” Taehyung squeezes the handle, choosing his words carefully. “I may not understand it, but whatever it is, I’m sorry.” 
He listens to Hisung shift in his seat, knowing the apology has caught him off-guard. 
“Don’t think I’m doing this for you, though.” Taehyung clarifies. “I’m doing this for myself and my wife, because what you did to her was truly cruel. And if you ever even breathe the same air as her, I’ll really shatter every bone in your body, and pay whatever price I have to. ” 
With that, Taehyung doesn’t allow Hisung to finish, shutting the doors and feeling a weight lift off his chest as he makes his way out. 
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The sun seems to shine more often these days. 
It’s an observation Taehyung had recently made, the weather letting up as a certain tropical storm crossing over Seoul had subsided. 
He welcomes the sun happily, supplying him the Vitamin D he truly needed. He tucks his shoes into the foyer as he enters his home, head popping around to look for his usual two housekeepers. He finds the kind ladies bustling about in his kitchen as normal. 
“Mrs, Choi, Seo, good evening.” 
“Good evening Mr Kim!” They both beam identically, and Taehyung’s eyebrows furrow with confusion. Their good energy evokes his own as he asks through a small smile. 
“You both seem happy, is there something I should know?” Taehyung queries before his usual questions pop up. “Did Y/N eat today?” 
They both squeal together as they regard Taehyung, their happiness brimming over as Mrs. Seo speaks up. “It’s actually about Mrs. Kim, sir.” 
“Yes, yes, all about her.” Mrs. Choi giggles. 
Taehyung laughs a little. “What about Y/N? Is she okay? Where is she?” 
“She’s in the garden!” Mrs. Seo excitedly cheers and Mrs. Choi bats her hand, tutting her about saying it too early and elaborating. 
“She’s in the garden out back, Mr. Kim. She decided to indulge in some light yard work today.” 
Taehyung’s eyes light up immediately, practically stupefied as his heart somersaults inside his chest. “She’s-she’s in the garden?” 
The two housekeepers replicate Taehyung’s happiness, chiming together. “Yes!” 
And before they could say anything else, he began bolting through his main floor towards the back french doors. He rapidly grabs the handle and swings it open as his heart thuds in his chest. He breathes unevenly as his eager eyes land on your delicate silhouette sitting on a bench. 
Taehyung’s eyes almost water, biting his lip to contain a foolish grin as he steps out into the grass, carefully approaching you. He genuinely believes he's in the midst of a dream. 
From the back, your hair reflects the sun that is slowly shying away into the horizon, the clouds painted a blushy pink as the sky eases into an indigo hue. A light breeze whisks your locks around almost lovingly, as though Heaven’s wind had decided to grace you tonight. 
Taehyung swallows down the wad in his throat as he slowly steps towards you, his feet dragging across the yard. You seem to hear the sound. Turning around, your face immediately brightens up at the sight of Taehyung, adorning a smile that he can tell so easily now, is your real smile. 
You don’t say anything, but Taehyung doesn’t need you to. All he feels is the wind caressing his face, sees the sunlight imbuing your eyes with almost empyrean colour, and he feels his heart become the lightest it’s felt in a long time. 
“You’re smiling,” Taehyung whispers to himself, almost in disbelief that he's seeing such a sight. You cast your hand over your lips and actually laugh a little, Taehyung snapping out of his daze and attempting to control his idioctic grin. 
You gesture for Taehyung to sit next to you, shuffling over and Taehyung gladly seats himself, never taking a single moment to diverge his eyes from you. 
It was funny to you almost; in a garden full of beautiful things, he seemed to only want to look at you.
“Hi,” Taehyung sheepishly smiles. You return the grin, taking your phone out from your wooly cardigan’s pocket and accessing your messages with Taehyung. 
The action calls his attention to your attire, jutting out to feel at the fabric with a chuckle. “This is mine, isn’t it?” 
Your doe eyes go wide, almost as if you’d just realized the cardigan did in fact belong to him. You instantly begin to remove your arms from the item until Taehyung stops you. 
“No, no, it’s okay. It looks better on you, anyway.” 
You send him a grateful grin, returning to your chat and typing something out until you click send. Taehyung feels his phone vibrate in his pocket and finds a message from you popping up. 
Princess ♡ : Hi
He cracks a content grin, having missed seeing your name on his screen. 
You watch Taehyung’s smile inch up onto his gorgeous face, sending him another message just to see the way his cheeks rise. 
‘How was your day?’ 
“Normal,” Taehyung shrugs, though he can’t wipe the grin off his face, finding himself far too giddy to stop adoring how cute you are. “Although, you won’t guess who called me.” 
You tilt your head in confusion as you type out another message, Taehyung’s phone buzzing yet again. 
Princess ♡ : Who called you? 
Taehyung grows excited as he leans a hand against the edge of the stone bench, his arm loosely encircling your frame as he amusingly jerks his brows. 
“Let’s just say he has the tendency to look like a cat.” 
Your entire system lights up like fireworks. Your eyes widen in surprise, clutching a hand over your mouth before your thumbs quickly tap over your screen, texting Taehyung. 
‘Do you mean my brother??’ 
Taehyung’s got a charming smile on his face, trying to contain his happiness as he nods. 
You physically brighten up as you begin to flap your hands, Taehyung laughing at just how endearing you are. It almost seems as though all your excitement can’t fit into your smaller form, and Taehyung doesn’t mind at all that no words come out of your mouth. 
He would love you dearly either way. 
‘What did he say?’ 
“He’s been trying to call you is what he told me, though I had to tell him you’d gotten a new number since.. everything.” Taehyung explains as his eyes flicker to the sun slowly setting, having shuffled closer to you as he admires the orange hues decorating your skin. He sees a joyful smile etched onto your lips, simply grateful for being able to see that precious smile again. 
“He really hopes his baby sister’s okay, and he misses you.” Taehyung curls some hair behind your ear. “He also said he’d kick my ass across the Han River if I wasn't taking good care of you.”
You let out a little giggle that Taehyung’s always found downright adorable, turning over his phone when you message him next. 
‘You should’ve told him to not worry. As long as I’m with you, I’m okay,’ 
Taehyung laughs as you send a little narrowed-eyed look with crossed arms, elated that he could see cracks of your true self coming through the darkness that had recently clouded you. 
Your gazes lock, and it’s as though you were both transported to the earlier days of your relationship, always having this innate sense to get lost in each other’s eyes. 
Looking for the sole purpose of looking. 
Taehyung smooths your hair a little, until he weaves his fingers through and holds your cheek gently. His thumb lightly plays with your soft earlobe as he gazes at you, his chocolate eyes saturated with a beautiful honey, and you smile when you find his lips perpetually curved. 
“What’s gotten into you today, pretty girl?” Taehyung asks with his warm, dulcet voice. You relish in the feeling of his thumb caressing you, leaning into his touch. “This is new of you.” 
You take a deep breath as you remember something, flickering your eyes to the sun before you type in your chat. 
‘I overheard you and Jimin the other night.’ 
Another message lights up his screen. 
‘I should’ve thought about your wellbeing more, I began to really feel like a burden to you.’
‘I’m sorry.’ 
Taehyung’s lips pout a little as he eyes return to you, conveying reassurance as he strokes your hair. “You’re never a burden, and you don’t have to say sorry to me, Princess.” He presses his lips to your forehead, kissing you sweetly. 
The touch of his lips feels wonderful, allowing those flowers in your chest to find the strength to bloom again. You tear up at the feeling of something other than sadness tainting you, swallowing before your tears could spill. You gaze at Taehyung, realizing that having spent all this time wallowing in your sorrow, only made you miss him so, so dearly. 
You sniffle as you nuzzle into his frame and throw your arms around him, hugging him as tightly you can. Your nose pressed into his chest as you caught a whiff of his rich, Invictus cologne, his scent having always felt like home. 
Taehyung similarly encompasses you in his big arms, embracing you with all he had to offer. Being this close brings your eyes to happy tears, feeling joy you didn’t think you’d ever feel again, or at least for a long time. 
You rapidly wipe at your eyes as you send him another message, attempting to keep yourself from crying. Taehyung seems similarly emotional as he reaches for his phone, watching the three little dots hover in the chat until it reveals your texts. 
‘Thank you for everything, Taehyung.’ 
‘I love you.’ 
Taehyung’s eyes swirl with numerous emotions as he peers at you, casting his phone aside and cupping your cheeks in his warm palms. He ensures you can see right into his soul, to see the truth he felt deep within his heart. 
“I love you more, Y/N,” he whispers. “So, so much more. And I will for the rest of my life.” 
Maybe it’s the sun setting beautifully, the flowers scattering the Earth with their gorgeous colour, or maybe the gentle breeze that sweeps Taehyung’s hair almost ethereally, that presents him to you as an angel. The sincerity in his eyes, the honesty in his smile, the way you could almost hear how ardently his heart was beating all made yours beat again, made you feel as though maybe you weren’t a mere husk simply stalking around, that you’d been revived. He fills you with light, this certain, hopeful light that you can’t describe, but can only say makes you infinitely, and absolutely happy. 
You touch foreheads with him and nudge your noses, Taehyung delicately holding your hands in his as he leans forward and pecks your lips. You smile as you bask in the moment, something suddenly popping into Taehyung’s head as he grins sheepishly, snatching his phone. 
He rises from the bench and works his phone, watching him with a tilt of your head and a confused, though amused smile. 
“There’s this new song I found,” Taehyung elaborates, setting the phone down on the bench. “I wanted you to hear it.” 
Finger tapping the play button on his screen, you and Taehyung are both privy to a sweet, slow ballad from his phone’s speaker. Taehyung grabs your hands in his and lightly encourages you to stand, joining him with a little laugh as he begins to gently sway your arms to the music. 
You seem unwilling at first, only a shy smile on your face as you move around to the beat Taehyung motivates you with. He begins to shift his feet and dance along with you, giggling as his movements influence you to finally adopt his rhythm. 
Sooner than later, you’re slowly dancing to the soft music. Your hands land against his wide chest as Taehyung encircles your waist, laughing when Taehyung holds you out and spins you into his arms, catching you like the utmost gentleman.
You both step around to the soothing lyrics and melodious music, comforted by the presence of each other. Your face presses into Taehyung’s chest, and he leans down until he rests his cheek against your hair. He kisses it somewhere while the song plays, feeling your heart flutter like the first time it did when Taehyung held you this close, a time that now seemed to be ages ago. 
“I love you,” Taehyung whispers against you, holding you closer as you listen to the beating of his heart. “I’ll love you for as long as I live.. always.” 
You feel your heart cinch with uncontrollable love for the man before you, keeping yourself from tears as you step around with him, chest lighter than air. 
‘I love you more, Tae. I always will.’
And even though Taehyung doesn’t get his reply aloud, it’s as though he reads your mind, feeling him smile against you.
His thoughts race as he clutches you tightly, reminded of dancing in an exotic kitchen with you in Greece. 
Everything was so happy then, a time where you and Taehyung could’ve been described as infinite. Every content memory then flashes through Taehyung’s mind; when everything used to be okay, when you were simply two people in love, two clueless humans trying to work together for a convenient marriage. 
It’s almost funny what became of his life, meeting a stranger he wasn’t sure of and convinced would only be an add-on of stress, now meaning the world and more to him. That same stranger having now become his muse, his everything, a part of him he would traverse the highest of mountains to keep safe.
Taehyung thinks love is just so funny like that. 
So as he steps with you in a slow, unhurried rhythm, he reminds himself that as funny as love is, it’s also pure and true, a feeling he didn’t know would mean baring his heart to someone and trusting them with it. That love would entail pain, sorrow, trial and error, though Taehyung believed that there would be nobody better to place his heart in the hands of. 
Because no matter all the awful things you’d both been through and are still trying to survive, he’d trust for eternity you’d never crush his heart.
 And he would do everything in his power to protect your precious one.  
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Taehyung rips open a tea bag as the water finishes boiling, slipping in his organic green tea. He plops the bag in a few times until the colour changes, and his tea presents itself to him warmly, fogging up his glasses as he looks in. 
He clears his throat as he brings the cup to his lips for a sip, feeling slightly under the weather these days, though yesterday filled him with almost vibrating content. Taehyung’s felt more alive ever since then, often recalling the sweet moment whenever he could. 
Things were changing, and he couldn’t have been happier. Just simply seeing the smile on your face meant that you were getting better, slowly but surely, and maybe things wouldn’t always be so awful anymore. 
The simple prospect makes him joyful, smiling to himself as he remembers your little conversations yesterday while sipping his tea. He licks his lip as he stares down at the warm beverage, content to be soon joining you in bed and snuggling up by your side. 
He jogs up the stairs with his cup in his hand. He pushes open the door to your bedroom, ready to see you sleeping peacefully in bed, though oddly doesn’t find you in place. He instead sees the sheets of the bed ruffled to the side, and his mind spirals with confusion in a matter of seconds. 
He slowly, precariously steps to the other side of your bed, and that’s when his entire system erupts with panic. Taehyung drops his tea within an instant, and rushes to you immediately as he tries to breathe. He attempts to think logically as he finds you unconscious on the floor, heartbeat on a highline.
“Y/N, Y/N!” It’s all he yells, he yells and he yells as tears flood his eyes and he feels pain he’s never experienced his entire life. Through his excruciating breathing, he manages to scramble for your pulse and finds a steady one, feeling some sort of relief. 
He clutches your limp body in his arms and reaches over for your phone on the nightstand, calling 911 while a few scared, worried tears of his spill onto your white nightgown. 
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“Mr. Kim, you need to step back.” 
“No! How could you ask me to step back when my wife’s in there?!” 
Taehyung begs for anyone to let him into your hospital room, demanding an explanation for what’s happening to you. 
“Please, just please tell me what’s wrong with her. She was fine yesterday, she was fine!” 
“You need to let us run the necessary tests on her, Mr. Kim. I assure you your wife is fine, please remain seated in the corridor until we can let you in.” The doctor dismisses Taehyung as politely as he can before disappearing, leaving Taehyung anguished and frustrated in the hospital corridor. 
He can feel himself crumbling, his entire system has reached his breaking point and he feels like he can’t breathe, can’t speak without it burning his lungs. He feels like he’ll collapse, seconds from giving away until he hears familiar voices rushing towards him, suddenly engulfed in his friend’s Jimin’s arms. 
“Tae, hey, hey. What’s wrong? What happened?” 
Taehyung can’t even find it in himself to speak, his throat clogging up. He feels an immense amount of pain in his lungs, feels sheer worry for your well-being as his mind spirals into a sickening abyss.
“J-Jimin..” He begins, holding onto his friend to remain stable. His entire consciousness is breaking apart, his heart is pounding in his chest as he feels gravity weighing him down. He’s suddenly joined by some of his other friends in the hallway, providing him some strength to stand. 
“Tae! Holy shit, are you okay?!” Jungkook immediately catches Taehyung other side as he arrives. 
“Tae, oh my God, is Y/N alright?” Hoseok comes rushing in, soon joined by Seokjin and Namjoon as they run into the scene. 
“Tae..” Seokjin watches him try to breathe, his eyes watery and distressed as he swallows down his emotions. 
“Jimin, she was fine. I promise she was fine yesterday..” He imploringly tells Jimin, desperately attempting to wrap his head around the situation as his friends look on. “She was okay.. She-she smiled for the first time and we were okay and we-we danced together and she was okay..” 
Taehyung truly can’t take it anymore, this is his breaking point. 
“She was fine, she was fine and I found her on the floor collapsed and I-” 
“Hey, Tae, shhh.” Jimin hushes his friend, walking him towards the chairs as Taehyung visibly can’t seem to hold himself upright. “She’s gonna be okay, Tae. She’ll be okay.” 
“Why was nobody looking after her? Why didn’t anybody look at her health?!” Taehyung yells to not exactly anyone, speaking aloud as his words soon make him realize that out of everyone, he should’ve been the one looking after you. 
Not just his housekeepers, not your parents or his friends, it should’ve been Taehyung paying attention to your health. He should’ve been checking with you more regularly, should’ve hired a nutritionist or a nurse, tried to balance the messes at work with taking care of you more often. 
And Taehyung painfully snapped into two. 
“It’s my fault..” He whispers quietly to himself, vision falling to the ground, realization washing a cold wave over him. 
“What?” Jungkook queries as he and Jimin get him seated on a chair, but Taehyung’s long gone by then, eyes glossing over as he drowns in his mind. 
“It’s my fault.. this is all my fault.” Taehyung lifelessly stares at the ground, clutching his palm to his mouth as he attempts to subdue his tears, swallowing them back in excruciating pain. 
“Taehyung, no, this isn’t your fault. You were..” 
Taehyung can tell it’s Jimin talking, soon joined by Namjoon detailing how the blame can’t be put on him, but he doesn’t really hear anything. All he hears is white noise, and the world around him disappears as his mind silently storms with a hurricane of regret, guilt and worry, wondering where he went so wrong, wondering every single little thing he could’ve done, should’ve done.
Wondering what he’ll do with himself if he doesn’t get you back. 
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It’s the hushed sound of the TV that you hear first, stirring you awake. Your eyes slowly flutter open, and meet a white, plain ceiling above you. 
You swallow once you feel the sandpaper-dryness of your throat, attempting to move, however, your body feels much too limp and weak. You produce a little noise of pain, flitting to the side once you register your hand feels warm with a certain weight. 
It’s being held by someone else you discern, shifting your line of sight over to find the one person in your life that makes you believe in galaxies. 
“Taehyung..” 
You say it so breathlessly, raspily as Taehyung’s listless eyes remain focused on the TV, flickering to you once he feels your fingers clutch him back. He seems to have heard you too, and you see something inside him that glistens faintly, though powerfully. 
Almost like a glimmer of hope.
“You talked,” Taehyung seems caught in a moment of strong emotion, tears evident in his sunken, tired eyes. His expression erodes into one of infinite, though silent happiness however, his eyes communicating the relief he feels. “It’s been a while.. since you’ve said my name.”  
You flood with tears as you see the sheer happiness in his eyes, his surprise at simply hearing you speak crushing your heart. Then, you notice the pale, pale look of Taehyung’s skin, wondering when he lost that gorgeous tan, honey glow to him. Then, it was his sullen eyes, the dark colour underneath them indicative of his lack of sleep. He seems skinnier now, his cheeks having lost their bread-like poof and are now more hollowed out. 
Your husband looks drained, as sickly as you almost, and even if Taehyung still manages to appear handsome, your chest is inflicted with a century of emotions that rip you apart. 
You did this to Taehyung, all you ever did was make him worry for you all this time, and you didn’t consider enough how much he must’ve been hurting too. Yes, it crossed your mind, but seeing the physical effects of that pain and sorrow left you emotionally reeling. 
“Tae..” 
Taehyung smiles, clutching your hand tighter as his eyes flood with tears, though he keeps a cool, composed face. “I thought I’d never hear you say my name again.” 
Emotion builds up inside you too profound to handle, intaking a deep breath to control them as you clutch his hand back. You attempt to get up, but you immediately ache all over and exclaim in pain. Taehyung rises rapidly from his seat. 
“Woah, hey, don’t.” He holds out his hands. “The doctor said you need to rest, don’t strain yourself.” 
You settle back into your bed as Taehyung lays you down, fixing the covers for you. You watch him do so as your eyes can’t help but admire his beauty, his warmth, him. 
“What happened, Tae?” You inquire, your voice quiet, delicate, coarse from not having spoken in weeks. 
He looked at you carefully, ensuring you were fine before he found his seat. He slithers his fingers into yours again and presses the back of your hand to his lips, swallowing. 
“You passed out, malnourishment and dehydration.” Taehyung explains, his tone steady, but his eyes a stark contrast. “Your body was running on practically nothing. You were low on water. If you’d gone any longer without it..” Your husband purses his lips as he seems to run through what he was told, wetting his lips before he bleakly answers. “Hypovolemic shock was on the table.. I may not have seen you again.” 
Guilt immediately infiltrates your mind, feeling the weight of what you put Taehyung through. He appeared okay now, but the very idea of not knowing your condition must’ve killed him on the inside, you could see it in the way his slightly bloodshot eyes revealed signs of crying. You feel regret as you contemplate what you would’ve done if it were him, and can only imagine how he felt. 
Just as you think of the possibility, Taehyung silently, and very quietly, lets tears escape his eyes as he simply holds your hand to his lips. He blinks, the salty water rolling down his cheeks as he stares at nothing in particular. 
“Baby..” You coo gently, free hand finding the strength to touch his cheek and wipe his tears, soothing him. “I’m sorry, Taehyung. I’m really sorry.” 
“Don’t be, angel.” He laughs a little, clasping your hand that holds his cheek as he sniffles. “You never have to say sorry to me, remember? All I need is your health and safety.” 
“But-but I put you through so much.” Your guilt eats at you from the inside, losing your composure once your more conscious mind wraps itself around the situation. 
You were currently laying in a hospital bed, looking to your left to find an I.V drip; electrodes attached to your body and connected to a heart monitor. Not only were you malnourished but dehydrated as well? Hypovolemic shock? That wasn’t something to be taken lightly at all, and to think Taehyung had to deal with all this by himself. 
To think he could’ve possibly lost you because of your negligence of your health. 
Tears escape your eyes once you understand the severity of everything, catching a glimpse of some of the guys sitting outside your room, and your heart aches. Taehyung immediately hushes you once he sees the tears, bringing his forehead to yours.
“Shh, don’t cry, my Princess. It’s over now, you’re okay.. you’re okay.” Taehyung reassures as he brushes his thumb against your hand, pressing his lips to your cheek for soft kisses. “You’re here, that’s all that matters.” 
You attempt to find strength within yourself, following Taehyung’s example of perseverance as you sniffle away your tears, gulping them down to appear more put together. Taehyung draws back and searches your eyes, wetting his lips. 
“I have news, baby.” Taehyung begins. “Everything that’s been happening.. all of this pain you had to go through.. I’m going to fix it.” 
You sniffle as you tilt your head. “Fix? How will you fix it?” 
“I have a plan, and I will fix things for you, for us.” Taehyung tenaciously voices as he clutches your hand, almost solidifying his promise. “I’m done watching people speak ill of you, push you and us around like we’re some freakshow.” Your husband argues passionately. “I’m taking charge, and I’m ending this for good.” 
Taehyung's sudden burst of confidence and assurance almost inspires you, though you still remain with a million questions. “What do you mean, Tae?” 
He looks at you as though you were his most precious treasure in the world. And little to your knowledge, that’s exactly what you were. 
“It means I’m going to protect the person who’s most dear to me” 
Your heart flutters as you return his affectionate gaze, suddenly missing the warmth of Taehyung’s arms around you, too far away from each other as you sit apart. You let go of his hands to hold out your arms like a baby, doe eyes and pouting, and Taehyung cracks a chuckle at how wholesome you are. 
He removes his shoes as he flips open your covers a little, slipping into your hospital bed with you. He fits in with you perfectly as you shuffle to create space. Taehyung’s arms wind around your figure as he pulls you close, pressing you to his chest. 
Your bare legs in just a hospital gown tangle with Taehyung’s clothed ones as you both lay on your side, hands draping his chest as you nuzzle into his cozy neck. Taehyung dips down and kisses your forehead as you purr like a kitten, feeling the safety of being in your husband’s arms. 
You allow your mind to enter a near matrix-like space, finding peace within his hold, serene quietness in your heart. Taehyung squeezes you tightly as his lips remain pressed to your hair, thumb soothing your arm. 
“What will you do, Tae?” You whisper to him, genuinely inquisitive. 
“I’ll do what I need to,” he answers simply. “As your husband, your partner, your person.. I’ll do what’s right.” 
“You don’t have to, Tae.” 
“It’s alright, Princess.” He assures you. “I told you I’d fight for us, didn’t I?” 
You nod against him, sniffling. Worrying about what he’ll do still clouds your mind, however, questioning again. “Will it be something difficult?” 
“With you by my side? Nothing’s ever difficult, Princess.”
You swallow at the vagueness of his response, though trust Taehyung as you feel the beating of his heart, thudding with a true rhythm that speaks a thousand honest, genuine words. 
“I won’t be doing it alone, though,” Taehyung adds on. 
“You won’t be alone? Who will you be with?” 
“Someone who’s been dying to see you.” You can tell Taehyung says that with a smile, though just as you’re about to query him, you hear a little knock to your door as it’s pushed open. 
“Bad timing?” You see an elated Jimin in your doorway, suddenly joined but a brawny bunny you know all too well. 
“Y/N, you’re awake!” 
“Oh thank God, Y/N. We were so worried!” Seokjin holds a hand to his heart. 
“I started praying all of a sudden, and I don’t even believe in God.” Namjoon hilariously remarks and the group snickers, Hoseok chiming in next. 
“I second that. I ask God for loads of things but never have I once prayed for anything harder in my life.”
The guys all merrily laugh as they pile into your room, finding Jungkook and Jimin happily accompanied by their fiance’s from what you know. You greet everyone jovially as their company brightens up the room that had grown dark, something about their positive energy so infectious, you forget this is a hospital room. 
You laugh and smile as you lay in bed and are constantly entertained by everyone’s shenanigans, feeling at home in such a loving, warm environment. Though what feels most like home is laying in your husband’s arms as he clutches you closely, feeling the familiar vibrations of his beautiful, beautiful laugh.
And suddenly, nothing felt so dark anymore. 
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“Yoongi.. I’m really scared.” 
“Shh, Taehyung’s got this, Y/N. You don’t have to sweat a thing, he’s planned everything meticulously.” 
You cower into your brother’s frame as he rubs a supportive hand to your arm, soothing your anxiety. You gulp as Taehyung breathes carefully, stepping onto a podium among a room of reporters, broadcasting networks and channels. 
Taehyung had called an emergency conference meeting that meant practically every media outlet in Korea was privy to this right now. You feel fear crawl up your stomach as you nervously watch your husband. 
“He still hasn’t told me anything, Yoongi. What is he going to do?” 
Your older brother sighs, side-hugging you as he peers down and speaks kindly. “You just have to trust him, baby sister. Let him do this for the both of you, alright?” Yoongi squeezes you tightly as he presses a kiss to your head, feeling warm inside with your brother’s support. 
You take a deep breath as you view Taehyung standing confidently before everyone, no paper or pen in hand, all but his dignity and honour to offer the audience. You watch him swallow as he looks at all the cameras flashing before him, everyone in the room coming to a silence. 
He flickers his vision to you, indistinguishable emotion in his expression as you return him a smile, silently encouraging him that whatever he’s going to do, he’ll do it just fine. 
And so, as your heart hammers against your rib cage and you clutch your clammy hands over your chest, you watch Taehyung tap the mic precariously before he begins.
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prev. ↞ || ↠ next || masterlist
final chapter teaser: 
“I do.” 
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tags:  @thedarkwinterrose​ @ayujaded @couldbeyourlast @ladyarmanto @anpanman-sonyeondan @apollukee @blueevelvt @taesluttt @scalubera @laurynne5 @dreamsindreamss @thequeen-kat @awsome-small-k @wrecklesssly @kweenhu @jalexad @koorby-blog @bangforever @dyriddle @aianloveseven @waves-and-woods @hoefortaeshands @veronawrites @nightapple4jk @wataemelonz @aomi-nabi @katbonv @hantaev @jinpuddin @usamizuki @wooya1224 @bambuzlee @jenotation @tangledsparkles @forbts-only @dumplingley @ccmemoirs @kleritata​ @thelilbutifulthings @maygem2780 @lachimolala95 @betysotelo18 @prettycoolting @jeonlovers @honeyboocal @preciouschimine @enchantaeduniverse @hakko-bby @mrs-jeonjk @marvel-ing-at-it-all @rvdls96 @vaekth @taehyungkittyuwu @multistanbitxh @vantaesy @invincibletaetae @hisbutton-nose @cafe-gemini @ot7central @iwanttohitmyself @rlynotme @heyitsgracex @mama-m0chi @derinxj @crystalizedmagic @yoonchrisgullwrites @allie-mcginn @vintageroses10 @ephemeralkookie @rocketxme @honey-littlegirl @croctusjuice @k-fb @itzybitzylovebug @sunas-bby @sugaslittlekookies @kimsamsoon95 @ppeachyttae @defjjks @sakurauchiha2018 @kbiancahirang @highkey-fangirling @bangtan-uwu @3sriracha @lovelyseomin @zippytheshark37 @my-current-mood-is​ @seolarsyj @drumsofheaven @moonsjoons @svftbaby @geekz077 @jeonchokoolate @honeyspillings @bigtiddies44 @sereineity @nikkiordonez12 @sugasbabiie @hadatita @fromthedt @blancheinneverland @jinsonaz @bluesharksandfish @longtimenospooning-luci @aishdere @levrantae @imaginereaderonly @taehyoungmoney @defnotjolie @worldofhyeri @neverthefirstchoice @blvckbarnes @taebabie11 @pootaetoo @veryberysleepy @btsmakesmehappy @hobipaint @btseditsworld @btsmylife21 @scxrlettkx @almosthappysublime @infernal-alpaca @yeotan07 @bloomytaee @lovelyloverlia​​​ @jimilter @yoonlilacfairy​ @bangtannoonalvg​ @bangtanhome​ @haniiii @i9hyuck​​ @yiyi4657​ @vantedmp​ @kurooslilbish 
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helenazbmrskai · a month ago
Text
Bad Alpha, Sweet Alpha KTH (m)
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BAD ALPHA, SWEET ALPHA
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Pairing – Alpha! Taehyung x Human (Female)! Reader
Genre – Werewolf AU, Smut(y smut), F2L, Angst (very tiny), PWP, Alpha Going Into Heat AU, Straight Up Filth AU, fluffy fluff, humour
Summary – [You’ve been in love with your best friend for years. Now here’s the problem Taehyung’s wolf hates you. But why he hid the key and then refused to tell you and Taehyung where he put it? Nonetheless just before his heat is about to start.]
Warnings – rutting, heat sex, oral (f + m receiving), dry humping, dirty talk, handjob, blowjob, vaginal fingering, unprotected sex, creampie, multiple orgasms, a lot of cum and by a lot I mean a looot, knotting, cum eating and stuffing, cumswallowing, gagging on your alpha’s cock, alpha kink, standing sex, cock riding, underwear sniffing, size kink, cockwarming if you blink, Taehyung is chained up but later OC releases him, he cries at one point but not in a sexual way (?), love confessions, Taehyung eats his cum out of your pussy, talk about breeding kink, teasing, overstimulation, one (non sexual) choke scene but nothing serious, sexual tension, sorry if I forgot something as you can see there’s a lot on my plate this time to present you
Word Count – (12k); 
Author note. Even I am getting fed up with sex after I pushed this baby out in one sitting (you will understand my reference after reading). I don’t think I’ve ever written down ’cock’ this many times before. Also, this is my longest smut so far so I hope you’ll guys enjoy some heat werewolf sex. I don’t know why but writing this was easy the word count just flown over the roof and I planned to make this maybe 6k or something. I don’t know if it makes me naughty af but I guess I am and I offer this piece to all the nasty and kinky asses out there to enjoy this as well.
Masterlist –
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”No. Don’t even try to persuade me to stay a few more days. You know your wolf hates me, he’s always so mean when you’re around the time to go into heat.” If your scowl’s sharpness could manifest Taehyung is sure their tv would be already sliced in half. You’re currently flipping through the channels with your legs in the wolf boy’s lap not amused in the slightest when he started to whine about being alone before his heat hits. You know it’s the preheat that keeps him agitated and clingy like a lost puppy. He’s always more affectionate and needy in terms of physical contact.
You’re only here inside the bagtan pack’s cabin tucked in a secluded area lined with trees and nature, arguably the best hiding spot for a feverish wolf with little to no possibilities to break loose and run around town, because your friend asked you to stay for exactly an afternoon and keep him company. You reluctantly agreed as none of the boys were available but you refuse to stay when it’s just 24 hours before the shit hits the fan.
”No! That’s not true! He doesn’t hate you Y/N he’s just having a hard time showing his emotions.” Rolling your eyes at his pathetic excuse, it’s obvious that neither of you believes it he’s just saying that to appraise you. His tactic is clearly not working to get you to stay as you’re being the more rational one out of the two of you, for one crazy moment, even if you believe that his wolf is just rough around the edges your stay would risk him have a harder time sensing your pheromones and shit like that in the air while experiencing his actual heat.
”The problem with that statement is Taehyung that you two say very different things.”
You’re not exaggerating thinking that his inner wolf is not very fond of you. Taehyung is not always aware when his wolf takes over but he’s nothing but rude when he catches you hanging out with your friend. Most times he only takes over when he’s on the brink of passing out from exhaustion or his heat coming soon. In order for his wolf to get into the forefront of his mind he needs to disconnect from his body, it could be achieved either by exhausting himself or being in a frenzied state that comes from the heat taking over his senses and thoughts.  
The last time his wolf graced you with his presence he kindly told you to fuck off because you stink. He always watches you with narrowed eyes and nitpicks at anything you do telling you how much he doesn’t like you hanging around Taehyung.
Letting the remote land on the couch between your bodies you twist your body out of his hold to get up. You need to catch the last bus and it’s quite the walk to get there you don’t want to commute in the dark and it wouldn’t be the wisest to stay the night.
”Tae, did you lock the door?” Said man arches a brow after you accuse him of tampering with the front door and casually walks to where you stand with your backpack in one hand and the other on the knob that doesn’t budge no matter how hard you twist the handle. Taehyung shoos you away grabbing the knob as well but even with his strength, it doesn’t move an inch.
”Huh, I didn’t lock it though.” He wonders aloud trying again and again but with little progress in the department of freeing you.
”If it wasn’t me and you then there’s only one person who could have done it. Ask your puppy why he locked us in.”There’s a growl unconsciously slipping letting you know by Taehyung’s widened eyes that he was not the one who growled at you but the little shit inside his mind. He looks at you sheepishly before raising a finger for you to wait probably to talk to the brat who’s responsible for this mishap.
Taehyung’s perfect eyebrows furrow as he silently converses with his other half, seemingly getting frustrated as he gnaws on his lower lip. He catches your gaze a few minutes later laughing awkwardly while massaging his neck that’s his habit when he’s nervous.
”He won’t tell me where’s the key.” Taehyung’s eyes dart over the room just to avoid your death stare, failing as he feels it on his skin making a shiver run down his spine.
”Taehyung.” You warn him, your hands grab his t-shit and get in his personal bubble to appear more threatening. He might be an Alpha but Taehyung still cowers under your intense gaze. Right then and there his eyes flash gold and his avoiding eyes fill up with cockiness as if daring you to do something. You know that it’s not Taehyung you’re dealing with anymore. What a coward letting his wolf face your wrath.
”Where. Is. The. Key.” With each word, your tone gets dangerously lower as your faces get closer to the point where you could count every individual eyelash if you wanted to. Taehyung’s smirk only grows as you impatiently wait for an answer or even an insult. You can’t possibly come up with an explanation why his wolf would hide the key. He sure doesn’t want you here when Taehyung’s about to go into heat.
”I don’t know what you’re talking about but better watch your bratty mouth. Taehyung might be intimidated by your glare but I don’t fall in that category. I could easily snap your neck right here right now.” To emphasise his point he curls his long fingers around your throat and squeezes it a little not enough to hurt you though.
”Why would you lock the door? I need to leave before Taehyung’s heat arrives. Even though you hate me after it affects your thought process you wouldn’t be able to stop yourself from wanting to fuck me. Unless that was your plan all along.” You say the last sentence as an afterthought but then you see a weird glimmer in his golden eyes bleeding into Taehyung’s familiar black like he’s fighting for his control back.
The amber hue leaves after a stinky eye roll to your way from the wolf and the next minute you have Taehyung’s wide ones back. He immediately lets go of your neck apologising for doing it in the first place.
”What if we break a window?” His idea would work in any other place but this cabin was structured to house a horny wolf, the door and the windows are foolproof there’s no chance you could break it with anything you have here inside considering that there are no knives and other objects that could potentially harm someone. Even the damn forks are plastic.
”Well, we searched for the key everywhere in the house. That fucker hid it well I’ll give him that.” You fasten the straps around his ankles to be sure they won’t budge if he pulls on them. ”Pull. Great, they’ll hold.” You hum before moving on to lock the metal cuffs around his wrists too.
”Our only bet right now is to chain you up so you wouldn’t jump my bones and fuck me into the next Sunday.” Your blunt words force a pink blush to spread across his cheeks, your words affecting him in an embarrassing way knowing how close the hours are to start his rut. You don’t blame him when he pops a boner just by talking about sex.
You take a minute to study his face after you’re done locking him up. There’s a light sheen of sweat lingering on his skin a telltale that his temperature started to rise to prepare him for the upcoming days. Taehyung’s face is already pained when he shifts around sitting on the floor. Not the best design as the chains could only connect to the opposite wall, it would be a lot more comfortable if he could lay on the bed but the chains are not long enough to extend to that part of the room.
On top of that, he has to suffer to have you right beside him but unable to relieve himself the boys won’t come until his heat passes and that means you’re stuck.
”I’m sorry Tae. This is exactly why I wouldn’t want to stay, you’ll suffer smelling me.” You watch him with a pout as soon as you cup his face with your palm he nuzzles into your skin like a touch starved puppy, his breath hits the inner part of your wrist letting you know how he not so subtly inhales your scent.
”It’s ok. You smell delicious anyway.” It doesn’t make much sense to you but you don’t ask him what he means by that and simply card your fingers through his hair, he’s sweating even more now. You could spear him some light touches before you have to keep your distance.
You have a feeling that his heat will come sooner than he predicted it’s probably your scent that triggers his heat to hit earlier, one more thing to feel bad about as you watch his eyebrows pinch together in discomfort. If only his wolf didn’t hide the key.
There’s this twitching thought surfacing from time to time as you think about what his intention might have been to do something reckless like this. Frankly, you know that his wolf acts on the deepest desires Taehyung has. Tae and his wolf are not that separated from one another that’s why it disheartens you whenever his wolf rejects you so harshly. There’s a part of you who mulls over the fact if perhaps he doesn’t want you around and his wolf is giving you hints to get lost. But on the contrary, you don’t get the vibes from Taehyung that he doesn’t cherish your friendship.
Even when you settle down on the bed at a safe distance from Taehyung’s chained up form you can’t stop thinking about the other possibility. It’s ridiculous considering how his wolf was ’playfully’ choking you almost half an hour ago. If you think of it as a theory you doubt it he hid the keys to force you to stay. Taehyung did ask you to not leave him earlier and maybe if it was an unconscious decision from his wolf to hide the key so his other half’s desire for you to stay get fulfilled. There’s this other thought that kinda links them together and that would mean he wants you to stay because he wants you to help him out. He wouldn’t want to suffer otherwise being this close to you if he truly didn’t want you.
He never asked you though. It’s not like it never crossed your mind to help him if he wants you to but you always felt weird bringing it up in a conversation and he never indicated that he would even like that or not. Maybe you should talk about it with him before he entirely gets under the influence of his heat. You wouldn’t have a peace of mind if he doesn’t give you his full consent. As soon as the urge to mate gets too strong he would say yes in a heartbeat but it wouldn’t be his objective decision and you don’t want to take advantage of him.
”Hey Tae. Are you up?” He jerks when you try to touch his shoulder his sudden movement makes you pull your hand back. His eyes started to turn gold again but he’s still Taehyung, the black part is larger for now that hints that you should hurry up and talk.
”Sorry. I won’t touch you.” You step back confused when Taehyung whines at the distance and tugs on his chains.
”It hurts.” He grits out, his canines are larger than before as they sink into his bottom lip tasting the blood.
”If it gets unbearable do you want me to help you?” Taehyung snaps his head once you leave the question in the open. You can see he’s contemplating what to say so you wait patiently for him to gather his thoughts. It must be harder as his focus slips ever so often.
”I’ll be ok. I don’t want to force you.” His words are only half-hearted as you see how dejected he looks after rejecting your offer. It gives you hope to approach the topic again as he doesn’t seem to be opposed to it he just doesn’t want you to feel like you have to help him.
”I. Look. I want to help you Tae. Be honest with me. Do you want me to help or not? I swear I won’t be mad if you don’t want to have sex with me...if you find me repulsive or-”
Taehyung growls when you mention the last part, he looks actually angry that you mentioned it so you shut up immediately.
”I would never find you repulsive Y/N. You can’t imagine how many times I imagined fucking you in different positions just today.” He shivers as he seems to remember those fantasies but his eyes clear the next second to regard you a few steps away from him.
”If I let you help me our friendship will be over. I don’t want to lose you Y/N. I want you but I can’t have you.” Your head tilt tells him that you’re not catching on to his secret code. He didn’t want you to find out this way but he knows you’re stubborn and you’ll pester him until he spills the beans anyway so here goes nothing.
”If I fuck you there’s no way I could go back to being your friend. It’s all I want and it’s not just only the heat talking. I want to hold your hand and kiss you do couple-y stuff and fuck you till you’re full of my cum. I love you so much but not as your friend.”
You’re confused, to say the least after his confession. Your heart beats so fast that you’re afraid it will break free from your ribcage. Never in a million years you would have thought Taehyung has feelings for you. You want to believe him but your insecurities are holding you back.
”B-But your wolf hates me.” You trail off at the end of the sentence avoiding eye contact as Taehyung whines and you hear the chains rattle as he tries to move around.
”He doesn’t hate you. He’s just scared. I’m scared.” The way he pleads with his eyes to believe him makes you recoil. All this time you thought that he hated you but he sure would tell you the truth right? You hope he’s not just saying that to spear your feelings. Because you experienced enough heartache while thinking that his wolf rejects you. It prevented you from making any move on him as you thought he’s not interested in you being as anything other than just his friend.
”Are… are you saying that your wolf acted like that because-” You don’t dare finish the sentence in case your wrong but the recognition in Taehyung’s eyes tell you that you two think alike.
”Because he doesn’t want me to get hurt if you… reject me.” The wolf boy bashfully finishes it for you and you swear your heart skips a beat. Taehyung indeed was projecting his deepest desires and fears and it turns out to be that he treated you like this because he was afraid you’ll never reciprocate his feelings. He told you to stay away because he was protecting Taehyung from you. He recognised his feelings for you and since you didn’t make any move to indicate the attraction is mutual he went defensive.
”I’m not rejecting you Tae.” This time when you reach out to press your palm against his cheek he lets you, his whole body shutters when you caress his cheeks with your thumb. There’s a low rumble coming from the back of his throat that reminds you of a happy cat purr. Once his heat is over there’s so much you need to talk about that’s for sure but right now you’ll solely focus on Taehyung getting through it and help him satisfy the hungry wolf inside him. Even though you’re kind of pissed at his wolf right now. The gold colour of his eyes slowly swallows the black as more of his carnal side shows itself as his preparation for heat reaches its peak.
”I’m mad I’m not gonna lie but I can understand why you would be hostile towards me. It doesn’t make me just forget about it though.” Just an hour ago you didn’t think that he’ll go from the cocky wolf who threatened to snap your neck to become this whimpering mess to beg for your forgiveness. He can feel your slight anger and confusion while his head tells him to mate you but he’s tied he can’t do anything and it’s killing him. The swelling inside his pants is getting harder to ignore the more closer you get.
”I want you so bad. Kiss me. Unchain me.” If you were a wolf just like him maybe his command would have made you snap into action but you’re not a wolf. Just a human. Somewhat you’re guilty of wanting to prolong his condition knowing that you’re his only release. It’s not like he’s the only one to blame in this situation, you were a fool too. You push his jaw up with your pointer finger kissing just under his ear softly that earns a needy moan to rip from his throat.
”Your smell is driving me crazy. Unchain me. I want to taste you I’ve been waiting for so long.” Taehyung is desperately rutting against your thigh his erection poking you through the rough material of his jeans. His eyes are closed in agony as his humping barely lessens the boiling desire to have you, all the blood rushes to his cock, throbbing for your cunt. You grab his chin to look at you, one more line of pretending before you help him through the pain, you decide.
”Funny I think you said that I stink. Should I leave you like this since I smell so bad?” The prospect of you leaving him hard in his pants and chained to this wall pains him, his mind tells him to please you. His mate. He should fuck you deep until he empties every drop of his cum inside. He already knows that barking commands won’t make you follow through you’ll just leave him hanging so he begins to beg for your pussy. He’ll literally die if he can’t be inside you, lust is burning him from the inside out. Taehyung whimpers and stutters like an omega in heat as if you’re the alpha he dutifully begs you and rubs himself on your thigh without his release in sight.
This is your first time experiencing how a wolf gets a one track mind nothing else is occupying his thoughts only sinfully explicit images as his rational part of him recedes and lets the carnal needs dictate his words and actions. This vulnerability is why they spend their heats in solitude until they find a mate to take care of them. Suddenly everything the boys told you about the experience makes perfect sense.
”I’m so sorry please don’t leave me. I’ll never do that again. I don’t hate you in fact the exact opposite of that. You’re the best smelling human on Earth, want you closer. I didn’t mean the things I said before. Believe me. Sorry for hurting you. So sorry.” The wolf in him is desperate, his instincts dictate to please you but can’t do that while he smells your reluctance. He knew that his words hurt you because he could always see it in your eyes but at that time being harsh seemed to be the best solution not to go crazy and bend you over the couch. Frustrated tears are rolling down his cheeks unable to think what else to do to get your forgiveness. Mixed with his unsatisfied state the tears easily gather behind his eyes.
”Don’t cry. I believe you.” Now you’re guilty to make him cry for something so insignificant when you finally got your confession. The other negative emotion that washes over you makes him cry harder. His vulnerable state prevents him from thinking rationally and make sense of the thoughts behind your emotions he could only tell that they’re negative. You kiss him slowly moving your lips over him until he reciprocates it just as carefully. Your heart flutters when he licks your lips asking for permission to taste you and you let him in happily.
”I’m sorry for making you cry. I like you too so don’t worry about anything right now and let me take care of you.” You whisper the words into his mouth, swallowing his moans with your lips as you caress his sides under his shirt moving lower to palm him over his jeans. Taehyung protests when you part from his lips he watches you with unfocused eyes as you walk to the bed and snatch a pillow from the pile.
You place the pillow on the floor and slowly kneel in front of him. His cock twitches when you’re close Taehyung eagerly lets you take off his pants and underwear in one go letting out a pleased sigh when his member is free from the cage of his clothes.
”I can’t release you just yet. You’re still too affected by your heat and you know a human can’t handle how rough a wolf can get. I’ll let you go after your head clears ok?” You rub his hipbone to make him relax, you can see from here how the chains strain against his red skin he wants to touch you so bad but he’s too strong to handle you carefully. Taehyung barely registers your words only hears that you won’t unchain him and he whines again loudly, the tears stopped but his face is still pained. You shouldn’t waste any more time he deserves his release.
”Order me. Do you want me to take you in my mouth Taehyung?” You taunt him with a small lick just long enough to taste his salty precum. The guttural moan he releases makes your core tingle with a new wave of arousal, you’re sure he can smell you in the air as you get wetter. Seeing his cock leaking so much precum turns you on. He’s so long and thick pretty veins are making sure that he’s as hard as a rock, ready to pound into your cunt. In your current state, you wouldn’t be able to take all of him, he’s too big for you. The thought excites you, you want him to stretch you out and make you cry out in pleasure as you feel him so deep inside, leaving barely any space for him to move. After he’s done with you you bet your pussy will be too stretched to go back to its original tight size for hours.
Your plan seems to work as you see the alpha getting riled up. ”Suck me off. I want to see your pretty lips stretched around my cock.” You obey immediately. You place both hands on his hips preparing with a long inhale of air to take him down your throat. He’s so big he won’t fit entirely in your mouth but damn if you are not going to try.
The wolf almost howls in pleasure as your mouth finally wraps around his dick, your mouth is tight around his shaft as you try to take more than half of him in. Taking breaks between your swallows you lick his tip in circles breathing in and out trying to regulate your heartbeat as you push down on his length as far as you can go. Some spit escapes from the corner of your lips rolling down your neck as you try to reach his stomach with your nose but you gag before it can happen. With blurry eyes you can see that all Taehyung wants is to keep your mouth in place with a firm hand in your hair when you withdraw after the gag. He would make you repeatedly gag on his cock loving how your throat constricts around him forcing the loudest moans out of him to reward your hard work and undoubtedly sore throat after you’re done. You know he’s close as his grunts come out more frequently and drop an octave. To make up for not being able to take his cock entirely you speed the bob of your head sucking and licking not caring that your saliva drips down to his balls. Taehyung’s body shakes you can feel it where your hand firmly grips his hips, your nails digging into his skin as you dare to swallow around his cock gagging when he repeatedly hits the back of your throat. Tears are sliding down your cheeks now without stopping while your throat begs you to stop you’re encouraged by the rhythmical throbbing of his shaft that he’s about to cum.
You’re careful to withdraw until only half of him is inside your mouth to avoid his hot cum spurt down your throat and instead opt for swallowing it at your own pace to avoid coughing since he has way more cum to offer you than a human male could. Taehyung’s undoing comes in the form of you moaning around his cock his entire body freezes every muscle in his body tenses until he’s done with emptying every drop into your mouth. You swallow diligently but it’s too much and some escapes to drip down mixed with your spit. Taehyung follows the route of his cum sliding down the elegant slope of your throat soaking your shirt as it continues its journey between your breasts where his eyes can’t see anymore.
”You ok little one?” Your fogged up mind catches his worried voice, you look up to convey a smile. You nod. The chains only let his fingertips reach your face but he’s gentle to rub your skin moving down to massage your throat and relieve the tension in your muscles.
”Did I do a good job Taehyung?” You ask him mischievously once you find your voice. The smirk he gifts you is enough to focus back on the throbbing of your pussy. You were able to forget about your own pleasure in favour to see Taehyung’s face as he reaches his high but now you want your release too. Your underwear is soaked, uncomfortably sticking to your folds. He’s already half hard as he responds to your increased arousal. Taehyung observes you for a long minute or two, his eyes are a lot clearer but his wolf is still present repressing the real Taehyung to come out and take over his body again. His heat is a lot stronger than any of his before.
”So good. You did a good job with following your alpha’s order. You deserve a reward.” Your eyes widen as Taehyung lands on his knees your kneecaps knocking together as he mimics your position. He leans in for a kiss that you immediately grant, his tongue pries your lips open to taste his cum mixed with your special taste and he’s pleased to find out you two taste divine together like this. Abruptly parting from your lips he licks the corner free of your saliva and rolls his tongue around your jaw and lower to your neck slurping up his cum and your saliva that he admired from afar. You place both hands on his broad shoulders to keep yourself upright, moaning softly when he leaves hickeys.
”Stand. I’ll taste you now.” His eyes are glowing gold leaving no room for further questions and you obey once again. Taehyung chuckles at how wobbly your legs are you have to stabilise your posture with your hands on the wall in front of you to prevent your fall. You didn’t think you soaked through your leggings as well until Taehyung rubs his nose to your clothed centre. He inhales your scent deeply licking a long line up faintly getting your taste on his tongue but he’s getting impatient as he can’t reach his hand out enough to rip your clothes off. You’re somewhat thankful because these are your only set of clothes here.
Taehyung lowers his hands to rest them on his knees watching you with predatory eyes as you get rid of your leggings and underwear with shaky hands. You’re so excited to get some attention that you almost trip on your discarded pants. If Taehyung’s mind weren’t so clouded by the thought of tongue fucking you the minute you close the distance he would have most probably laughed at your clumsiness.
”B-Be gentle at first, please. I’m sensitive.” You warn him timidly forcing Taehyung’s eyes to lock with yours. He simply nods waiting for you to come close enough to eat. After you release a deep breath you comply and step close that his nose nudges your mound. Taehyung kisses the top before doing the same with your folds, your shaky sigh is enough for him to poke out his tongue and lick but nothing past your pussy lips, he really is taking slow for you. Growing confident as he’s present enough to listen to your request you place one hand on top of his hair waiting till he tilts his chin up. He hums when you comb your fingers through his messy hair loving your affectionate gesture that he buries his face into your thighs to soak up the feeling of you being so close to him. He can feel your femoral artery pump your blood quickly just as your heartbeat quickens.
”Make me cum alpha, please.” You test the words if they will affect him the way you expect them. He growls hungrily his biceps are flexing to hold back as you guide your left leg to wrap it around his shoulder opening up your folds for him. He licks slow, at first only testing your wetness Taehyung finds your clit with ease applying pressure to his up and down motions to stimulate your little throbbing nub.
”A-Alpha.” You moan when he dips his tongue into your opening, tonguing your insides while continuously rubbing your clit with his nose, eagerly swallowing down your arousal welcoming every drop as it keeps coming, some running down your thighs that escapes his attentive mouth. He never tasted something this regal in his entire life. He gets bolder burying his whole face into your pussy wrapping his puckered lips around your clit and suck until your greedy hole clenches around nothing. You need his fingers there’s no way you can take him without proper prepping but you’re not sure he could hold back if you release him from his binds and not bend you over the bed to take him as it is.
”W-Wait. Taehyung.” You grip his locks at the base of his neck he can’t hear you it’s evident as he keeps his mouth on you licking your entire pussy like a madman to get more and more of your arousal straight from the source like an addict. Just when you tug harder that he looks up with his eyes unfocused and his mouth open. Chin and cheeks are wet with your essence that would make any woman blush.
”I need your fingers, let me get the key for your wrists.” You’re panting heavily, you almost think he wouldn’t let you go but he does with a rigid nod of his head. You walk to the bedside table and pick up the key Taehyung waits as you release one hand with shaky fingers you need to poke around the lock before you succeed in freeing him partially and then you slide the key farther away on the floor so he’s unable to reach it but you could easily go and fetch it if needed.
”You said you need my fingers. Release my other hand.” Taehyung barks displeased that he’s still bound. You want nothing more than let him have his ways with you but it’s dangerous while he’s in this frenzied state he can’t think clearly and his impatient glare is the answer you needed that you’re right. He can’t control his strength right now and you know he’ll feel bad if he hurt you so you need to be the stronger one for the both of you.
”Growl at me one more time and I’ll leave.” You need to show him that you’re not his prey to feast upon. As expected your words thankfully knock him out of that state, his scowl fades.
”If you want my pussy to come any near to your dick you’ll need to use one hand and prep me. I won’t release you until I know you can think rationally. I know you don’t want to hurt me so please-” You kiss him with half lidded eyes.
”- please trust me.”
The gold hue around his irises ebbs into a darker amber after your soft plea. Taehyung cups your cheek with his one free hand and caresses your jaw in a silent promise. This is different from all the shared kisses before, you can feel the longing and all the love he has for you through his sensually moving lips.
His hand leaves your jaw to travel down your neck and clothed chest, he continues to swallow your moans as he covers your breasts with his palm squeezing softly until your chest heaves faster. He can feel how quickly your heart is beating under his fingertips.
”So soft.” Taehyung grips the flesh of your hip kneading it with calluses fingers. You relax into his touches not alarmed at all when he lifts your leg to rest it against his shoulder like before to get a better angle. The pad of his fingers makes the first connect with your wet folds, softly rubbing you with two digits gathering your slick for the purpose of easy penetration. Soon Taehyung deems it’s slick enough for him to slide two inside slowly slipping them in to the knuckle. Your hand finds leverage pressed against the wall the feel of something filling you up gives you a short relief. He curls them searching around for a spot that makes your moan sweeter to his ears not letting up with his slow strokes.
”Ah so tight, I need to do a lot of prepping for you.” He’s adding a third finger just after as to reply to his statement. His wolfish smirk back on his handsome face, nothing like the boxy smile you’re so used to seeing. You press your cheeks to the cool surface of the wall, eyes falling shut to give in to the feeling of long digits exploring your core. You never expected to feel him this way, fingering you open to take his cock. You know that after he’s done with you you will never be able to go back to enjoying your own hands when you got a taste of what he can do to you.
Taehyung works in his pinky opting for slow half hearted strokes not pulling out much they’re solely there to stretch your walls. Not wanting to rob you of your pleasure he uses his mouth to stimulate your clit by sucking on it. Licking sloppy eights to feel your pussy close down on his fingers. It slightly burns, your walls want to close in on them but his fingers prevent you from the act. Using your previous tactics against you Taehyung hums making the vibrations throw you over the edge as he relentlessly sucks on your little bud. Your eyes are closed tightly until red dots fill up your black vision as waves of your orgasm wash over you. It’s embarrassing enough to feel your cum drip down your thighs escaping from the stretched hole as Taehyung keeps his fingers deep inside not letting you close your legs as he watches your thick release ooze out. If you were looking you would have witnessed his eyes following it with mesmerizing eyes. Shameless as he feels his cock throb with the desire to finally bury his length inside your sweet pussy.
”Thank you.” Your voice is soft there’s red colouring your cheeks in embarrassment while Taehyung just kisses your bitten lips as a passionate ’your welcome’ using his tongue as the messenger to deliver the words straight to your mouth.
His fingers slip out with a wet squelch throughoutly coated with your nectar Taehyung licks each digit clean before gripping his cock with one hand pumping his shaft to get himself wet and ready for you. He doesn’t need your cum as he has plenty of precum dripping down his entire length just from fingering and eating you out before.
You rub your legs together at the uncomfortable feeling of your walls closing without his fingers to keep you open. Taehyung catches the motion with hungry eyes he has enough strength in one hand to close the distance between your bodies with a single pull, chest to chest, with his cock resting right against your folds.
”Let’s start before your tight pussy gets even tighter.” You nod with a gulp so wound up that all you can think about is his cock parting your folds. Taehyung guides his wide tip to your opening pushing past the soft tissues that guard your cunt. The widest part of his length is still ahead of you to take four of his fingers stretched you out well enough to only feel pleasure when he pushes in the tip and a few more inches. You wiggle your hips as he stalls his fingernails are digging into your soft flesh as he tries to take it slow and not bury himself down to the hilt with one go.
It requires extreme self control from his wolf to be this gentle when all he wants is to break you in half. The sentiment makes your heart swell and you lean in to steal a kiss. He hums against your mouth like he understands your sudden thoughts, he pulls out a moment later until just his tip is surrounded by your tight heat and slides in a few inches more than before testing out how much can you take without making it uncomfortable for you. You only feel the burn again when your hips almost meet. Taking his cock was never the question what he’s worried about is how well can you take his knot. You’re too tight, your cunt was not made to take a wolf’s knot. He’s still hoping that you can, considering that the moon gave him a human mate, you should be able to fulfil the mating. It’s the first day of his heat he knows once he starts fucking you there’s no way he could muster the self control to pull out before he gets locked in your pussy.
”I-” Taehyung grunts when he bottoms out, your walls are hugging him warmly that he could cum right then and there if it weren’t for his thoughts. He’s forced to think about his pack members to keep his dick in check. Let’s think about unarousing things like Namjoon reading a book on the sofa or Jungkook yelling ’let’s get it’ before going on a run through the woods. Definitely working as he’s able to come back from his high. ”I don’t want to hurt you. I don’t think I can stop if I start.”
”You feel so good-” Taehyung swears under his breath when he feels your cunt tighten around him because his words turn you on. ”Fuck, I almost came just being inside you.”
You dare to chuckle while he has his cock in you that pisses his alpha wolf off. How dare you laugh and make fun of him when he’s stretching you out so greatly. Taehyung would laugh with you but his wolf is hungry for your submission he’s not letting you off the hook before you’re a moaning mess and beg him to let you cum. He’s in charge now, not your sweet Taehyung. The ends of your laugh turn to a moan when he slips out just to thurst back with greater force. If it weren’t for his hand around your waist you would have landed on your ass.
”Are you going to laugh now too?” The golden eyes remind you that he’s still deep in his lust filled mindset. You know a little about his switches. While his heat makes his wolf surface from the depth of his mind after you make him cum inside you and let his knot swell he’ll most likely go back to his dormant self and give back the blackness to his irises.
”N-No.” You shake your head.
Remembering what one of his pack members told you you bare your neck to him to show his wolf your submission. They told you this in passing as a bit of advice if someone attacks but you hope it can be applied in a situation like this as well.
Your vision blurs as he turns your body around to push you against the wall, the chains dig into your back but you don’t complain when the pleasure outdoes the pain. He thrust back into your inviting heat after he secured your new place. He keeps the slow pace but reaches deeper with each slap of your hips. Taehyung kisses your lips roughly while jerking your leg to curl it around his hips making the angle even deeper to satisfy the both of you equally. Your wanton moans are fueling him to keep fucking you letting out his own sounds of pleasure.
He could tell you’re nearing your high once again as you clamp down on his cock.
”I bet no male fucked you this good before. Are you going to cum this soon? I barely started and you’re getting so tight around my dick already.” He mocks you without the actual bite to his words he’s pleased with himself to make you cum so soon. Even as you’re itching to say he was about to blow his load as soon as he entered you you keep your mouth shut and moan louder to encourage him to finish you off. You don’t want to challenge an alpha.
”I want your cum. Please give it to me.” You keep convulsing around his length a telltale of your fast approaching orgasm even more blinding than the last as your thighs shake around his waist. Taehyung’s previous concern if you could handle his knot disappears as you keep pleading to release his load inside of you. Never wants to disappoint his mate Taehyung keeps up the fast pace outdoing each wet squelch your pussy makes with his low grunts against your ear.
He continues to fuck you like he means it. He doesn’t stop when you explode around him thrown into the biggest orgasm you’ve ever experienced making you numb to every other sensation that’s not sheer pleasure. It makes your blood boil and causes your eyes to roll back into your skull. Sensitivity hits you soon when he keeps fucking you fast and hard. Not even an ounce of doubt is there that you’ll have so many purple and green spots on your hips where he drags you across his cock.
He’s so hard inside you. Seems like he never gets tired as he pushes his cock in and out. Tethering around the edge of his orgasm when you feel the base of his shaft slightly swell against your opening. You know that he’s close but still fights against the knot. He fights the need to let his dick enlarge and lock you in place until he could paint your walls with his white cum.
”Let go. It’s ok.” You place a sweaty lock of hair behind his ears to gain his attention. His cock twitches inside as you kiss his temple Taehyung slows down his thrust to grinding to observe your expression and when he only sees your sincerity and love swimming in your blissful orbs he lets out a shaky exhale. He’s less animalistic with his thrusts than before he makes sure you feel good too as he drags his cock in and out.
He knows you won’t like it much when the base of his cock swells to prepare for his release. Taehyung doesn’t force himself to hold back anymore as now you can clearly feel the stretch bordering to be painful. Your walls are stretched to the limit but he’s still not there. Needs something more before he could go over the edge and let go. You force your hips to buck into his movements. Give his cock a tight fit as you make your muscles clench and bring him his well deserved release.  
”I want my alpha’s cum inside me. Want you so much, please.” Taehyung’s hips stills as you beg him to cum. Paired up with your sweet moans and his mate’s begging he comes with an outdrawn moan. Feeling the fullness you scratch his skin with your nails as you grip his back. Taehyung hisses at the pain but lets you hold onto him as he knows this is not the best feeling in the world. He peppers your face with kisses to distract you from the swelling and how much his cum make you feel a different kind of fullness. You try not to tense up but it’s hard as you never felt something like this before.
”Shh. So good. You take my knot so well. Just close your eyes and listen to your breathing. The pain will pass soon I promise.” You follow his instructions relaxing your muscles and focus on your shaky exhale. He’s not expanding anymore so you have time to get more accustomed to it. Taehyung does a good job of showering you with his affection. He keeps stroking your cheeks and caressing your stomach.
It takes thirty minutes in the position until you can separate. You curse yourself for kicking the key that far as you need to walk with Taehyung’s cum dripping down your legs. There’s so much coming out that you’re surprised your cunt could even store so much. Taehyung is smug as he watches you rub your legs with a towel, you don’t even want to think about the mess that’s on the floor.
”Let me help you beautiful.” You give him the towel and sit on the bed it’s only fair if he cleans you up considering it’s his cum that’s all over you but he surprises you by dropping the towel to the floor and instead crawl between your open legs.
”No, there’s no way I can cum again, you, animal.” The whiny edge of your voice only makes him chuckle into your soft inner thighs as he licks up a drop of his cum you left behind. He knows you’re tired that’s not what he’s trying to do even though the proposition is tempting.
”Relax I’ll just clean you.” Taehyung carefully licks your mixed cum still coming out of your spent pussy, rolling his tongue around your opening. He avoids your clit that makes it more believable that he’s not trying to rile you up again.
”Be a good girl and clench for me.” You do as he says without questioning him, the motion gets more of his cum to ooze out of you so that he can lick that as well. Realising his intention you blush a deep red to the tip of your ears. Fuck he’s so hot like this. Eating his own cum out of your pussy. If you wouldn’t feel too beat you would have definitely let him make you cum again. He flicks his tongue over your clit that would make your hips jump if he didn’t have his hands holding you down.
Once he’s done he kisses your quivering thighs and lets you close them with a gentle palm resting on your kneecap. Taehyung walks to the nightstand while you get under the warm covers, to pick a few tissues out of the box and get cleaned up as well.
You faintly feel his chest pressed against your back and two hands around your waist but you don’t open your eyes. There’s a dreamy smile on your face when you feel his lips press a light kiss to the crown of your hair. It’s hard to believe he’s the same person who has been fucking your brains out but you’re sure there’s still a gold hue around his eyes, reminding you that Taehyung and his wolf are not so separate as you sometimes think. He’s still your Taehyung at the end of the day.
You’re fast asleep as the exhaustion gnaws at your bones, there’s a heavy feeling that keeps your limbs from lifting a finger off the comforting bed and you succumb to the darkness.
Taehyung is up before you, it’s several hours later now with the sun nowhere near the horizon as the stars shine on the sky like small dots but you’re feeling as sore down there when it was still up. He knows you’re awake because there’s a spike in your heartbeat when he snuggles his nose to your pulse point. Taehyung feels more coherent than before his eyes are back to their perfect obsidian colour.
”Let me sleep a little more.” He wants to comply with your wishes but he’s so horny. He can’t wait another minute. He can smell his cum on you and it drives his senses crazy. If he closes his eyes and thinks hard enough he can still taste your arousal in his mouth. You’re such a delicious treat he wants to choke on your pussy and die as a happy man.
”Just let me put it in. I swear I’ll let you sleep a little longer.” You’re sceptical if he really has the self control for that but you still let him lift your leg and position his tip to your swollen entrance. He has enough precum smeared around his cock by his hands for the both of you to slip right in without the uncomfortable dry feeling.
His lips are close as you hear his moan directly hitting the shell of your ear. He sounds hot you admit it in your head. Your walls are still loose enough to take him in with one thrust no need for prepping you this time around. He pulls out halfway to push in just as softly testing the waters as he expects you to whine and remind him what he promised.  
”You’re such a liar Taehyung.” He sheepishly smiles into the crook of your neck but shamelessly starts a slow pace of his hips, driving his cock into you languidly.
”I can’t help it. You’re too irresistible and I’m still in heat.” You feel the need to roll your eyes.
”You won’t knot every time we have sex right?” You check with him as you move your hips in perfect sync. When you intentionally clench your walls around him he ruts his hips into you as thanks. Taehyung palms your ass under the covers careful not to lift it too high and let the cold air inside. He only wants you to shiver because his cock feels so good inside of you. His body heat makes you feel plenty of warmth though.
”No. I can control it later it’s just hard to hold back for the first time. I know you’re still sore I won’t knot again.”
You reward his words by pushing your ass against him clenching hard around his cock to make him moan.
”Pull out I want to ride you.” His fingers dig into your waist as soon as you tell him to pull out. He does and impatiently flips over to be on his back. Your eyes crinkle seeing his childish pout when you’re not moving fast enough to straddle him it’s comical since his cock is hard against his stomach with a pretty curve. It shouldn’t make you wonder how cute he is.
”Don’t pout. It should be me considering how hard your wolf made me cum just a few hours ago.” He knows you’re just messing with him you can practically see the wolf in him roll his eyes. You place a palm on his stomach with your other you fist the base of his cock to align it with your wetness playfully you rub his cock head up and down your slit letting the tip catch the hood of your clit and make the both of you moan.
”I’m certainly not calling him a puppy anymore.” Your smile is temporary as you choose that moment to sit down on his dick. It’s the best angle to show off how well you can take him even though it will be more tiring for you than for him as you’ll have to do all the work bouncing on his dick. He has a first class seat to watch your soaking wet folds stretch around his big cock. Or perhaps you have a first class seat to see him with his mouth open and pleasure hiding in every cervix of his expression.
”Fuck you feel even better now that my head is in the right place.” You let out a chuckle that if his wolf will be in control by this time you would have been flipped over to your back as he pounded into you like there’s no tomorrow. Instead, Taehyung shows you a smile in return. He places both hands on your love handles but doesn’t try to make you speed up he lets you have control, for now, that reminds you of something you discovered last time and you feel good enough to tease him about.
”You know Tae-” You start with a growing smirk that he can’t see while he moans with his eyes closed. ”I think you said something along the lines that ’I did a good job with following my alpha’s orders.’ does it spark recognition in you?” You lick your lips like a vixen. It’s impossible to not see the pink tinted cheeks. Unlike his other half, Taehyung is shy about showing you how much he likes when you call him your alpha.
”Is my alpha going to cum? Already?” You taunt him the same way he did. Taehyung’s cock twitches inside you at the name he loves how natural it sounds coming from you. He can feel the familiar tension build up in his muscles. You’re absolutely right that he’s close. Your pussy is so wet and tight around his length that it’s a miracle he could even last this long.
It’s good because you’re just a stroke behind to release as well. You cum first as Taehyung holds back like a gentleman. You ride out both of your highs until your leg muscles burn with the strain of riding his cock. You don’t know what to expect but you were hopeful he’ll have a little less load after that second orgasm when you took his knot. It’s his third orgasm but he still has so much cum that you need to take but without his knot to seal everything in place, it immediately started to flow out around his dick down to his balls and onto the sheets.
”Fuck. We’re a mess.” Even though all you want is to take a cold shower and get rid of all the stickiness either from the sweat or his cum you lean your forehead on Taehyung’s shoulder nuzzling up to him touching the sensitive part of his neck with your nose. Feeling how he shudders under you. He casually winds his arms around your form not bothered in the slightest by the mess you two made he’s just happy to have you in his arms. He knows it’s still not the time to talk about your feelings for each other at least until his heat entirely passes.
It’s the same routine for the remaining two days. You wake up to him either humping your ass or moaning so loudly while he masturbates right next to you on the bed that you have to lend him a helping hand. It’s a hard task to get him to do mundane things like eating and showering as all he wants to do is bury his dick in your pussy or eat said pussy.
After the third day, his heat is officially over. You were never one to say no to sex but you straight up told Taehyung to get ready for a dry two weeks because your lady parts need their recovery time. It’s a feat to drag yourself to the bathroom the next morning, you know one of the boys will stop by soon and you need to look like a human being again before that happens. You can’t even wash up without wincing in slight discomfort. Your pussy is so puffy and pink that you’re somewhat concerned.
Well, you did choose a werewolf as your boyfriend. At least there will be another couple of months before you have to deal with his horny ass again. The sex was great but you’re only human.
You soak yourself in warm water until your fingers turn to an old woman’s hands. You dress in one of Taehyung’s long t-shirts and boxers pulling your own pants over the fabric. You rummaged through his things as you didn’t plan to stay more than a day you didn’t have anything to wear and you weren’t going to pull your ruined underwear on your freshly showered body. Taehyung has enough change of clothes for the both of you, fortunately. It’s not like it will conceal much a wolf’s nose will easily tell that Taehyung’s scent is all over you. It’s a disturbing fact that they will be able to smell his cum on you so you try not to dwell on it too much.
Once you padded into the bedroom Taehyung looks at you from the bed with a lazy smile on his face. He greets you with a hoarse ’hi’ that would definitely have your panties in a twist if not all you two did was fucking for three straight days. Yeah, that’s not happening.
”Go shower and put some clothes on. Someone will be here soon to free us.” You peck his lips, catch him smile into the kiss as you start taming his curly locks with your fingers.
”It’s not like they haven’t seen me naked. Wait, are those my clothes?” His eyes grow big as he gives you a once over, you pleasantly smell like soap and his special scent mixed with yours. His big shirt is too big for you as it reaches just a little above your knees. You look good and smell like him that makes his heart flutter.
”I needed something to wear, you ruined mine.” You play with the end of his shirt, it’s big but comfy, you might just steal it.
”Anyway I’ll start on breakfast so go shower. I have your clothes already sorted out and placed on the counter for you in the bathroom.” Taehyung flashes you his boxy smile as you give him one last peck before you walk out the door to the stairs that will lead you to the kitchen. You know the cabinets are filled with food because one of the boys always make sure there’s enough before the date of someone’s heat.
Pancake butter is easy to mix and filling so you decide on that. Knowing that Taehyung must be famished after going like rabbits but not enough food to keep the enthusiasm now that there’s no longer a burning need to fuck you left and right.
You’re sore and exhausted and you didn’t even do most of the work you can’t imagine how sore his muscles must be.
You search for a medium sized pan thinking that it’s better to make smaller ones just like a snack. Soon the delicious smell of your pancakes lures your wolf boy into the kitchen. Freshly showered there’s still droplets of water clinging to his skin as he hugs you from behind.
”Smells great.” He hums, with one hand he pushes your hair to your other shoulder so he can kiss the skin there.
”I’m almost done.” You nod to the pile of food on one plate. ”You can have some if you’re hungry.”
It’s filled with honey brown coloured pancakes smelling indeed delicious. Taehyung doesn’t let you go even when you accidentally jab him in the rib while flipping a pancake on their other side.
”Oh I wasn’t talking about the pancakes baby.” He emphasizes his words by licking the patch of skin where your neck meets your shoulder, watching the goosebumps cover your heated skin not a moment after. You can feel his shit eating grin pressed onto your shoulder.
”Don’t even try if I have your hands wandering anywhere near my pussy I’ll push my boots up your butt.”
You feel Taehyung’s body shake as he laughs. He pats your hip twice before letting you go with his hands up in the air in a defensive stance just to humour you further.
”Yes, Ma’am.”
Your light hearted banter is interrupted by a key turning in the lock. Taehyung’s sensitive ear hears it first while you only realise there’s someone else in the house when his black mop of hair sticks through the kitchen door.
”Nice to see you two alive.” You should have guessed it will be Jungkook to check up on him. For a while, as you serve the pancakes for the boys you don’t realise that he addressed the both of you.
”Hey Kook. Why you don’t look surprised to see me here?” Taehyung perks up as well. It’s not like the boys had no idea Taehyung has feelings for you for them it was quite obvious from the get go.
”Ah right. We called you a million times so we went to your apartment to see if you were alright and your roommate told us that you went to see Taehyung at the cabin so we kind of put two and two together you know.” You think it makes sense, you’re friends with them it’s not unusual for them to call you for whatever reason.
Jungkook doubles over with laughter when you tell him what happened. Tears are streaming down his face by the time you tell him how his wolf hid the keys to the front door. It seems to happen ages ago while it was just approximately four days before today. You left out that part when he playfully choked you in the living room and you were dead set on not telling anything about your sexual adventures to his packmate.
You threaten Taehyung with not having sex with him for a month if he even thinks about telling your mutual friends about it. It shut him up immediately that kinda makes you smug.
You go back separately from the cabin Jungkook lets you take his car while he rides with Taehyung back to the packhouse. He kisses you goodbye with a promise to talk to you about everything later when you finish work and he’s done with his duties as an alpha.
You’re late by a minute to work but even your grumpy friend from the coffee shop you work at can’t make the smile disappear off your face. She regards you with narrowed eyes before she sniffs the air around you and crunches her nose in disgust. Right, you sometimes forget that she’s a wolf too. She probably sensed the sudden change in your scent that’s why she was looking you up and down with a scowl.
”You smell like you were just dicked down by an alpha.” Your face heats up at her blunt words but a customer saves you from having to answer her immediately as you take the patron’s order and silently start making a frappuccino with extra shots. Unfortunately, it’s still the morning so not many people come by and get their coffee it leaves plenty of time for her to interrogate you.
”Who is it?” Mina asks as soon as the boy leaves the shop with a cup. You know she’ll breathe down your neck if you prolong answering her so you turn around and start making your latte.
”I’ll answer your questions after I have my coffee. Everything hurts Mina. I don’t think I can ever get wet at this point.” She knows what you’re talking about it’s even taxing on a shewolf’s body not to mention that you’re just a fragile little human. She’s actually impressed that you had the energy to come to work today.
Mina only waits till you have the first sip of your coffee to bombard you with questions again.
”Wait till you come off your contraception pills. Their breeding kink is no joke I’m telling you.” You share a laugh however considering that she’s Jimin’s mate you don’t doubt the truth behind her words.
”Taehyung’s kink is to be called alpha in bed. He almost came just when I mentioned it.” The coffee Mina slurped on comes out of her nose. She wheezes at the mention of Taehyung. Oops, maybe you left out that part.
”Holy shit. You fucked Kim Taehyung?” You side eye her with a glare to keep her voice down, you don’t need to make sure the whole shop hears that you fucked your best friend. Not that the couple or that old lady knows who the fuck is Kim Taehyung.
”It’s crazy actually. His wolf hid the key to the door so I chained him up but then he kinda confessed that he’s in love with me and then I made him cry and you know… the rest is history.” She can tell that you’re quite guilty in that aspect so she pats your shoulder like an older sister who’s about to share the world’s wisdom with you.
”It’s not a big deal he cried Y/N, horny wolves are emotional wolves. Jimin cried after I told him he can fuck a baby into me.” It does make you feel better as the rest of your shift goes well. There was one rude customer who complained about his coffee being ’too hot’ but even that wasn’t enough to sour your mood. Taehyung likes you and that’s all you need to know.
”How’s that baby making going for you?” You ask her once the rush hour passes by and things get slow having only one or two people wandering in to order something.
”Ugh. Don’t even want to think about it. As soon as I get home he’s waiting there with his stupid sparkly eyes and his hard dick in one hand telling me how pretty I’ll be with his pups inside my belly. He was always a horny fuck but as soon as I gave him the green light to have our own family that’s all he’s thinking about.” You pat her back encouragingly as she rants. A few days ago you wouldn’t see why it’s a bad thing that Jimin has a one track mind as sex feels amazing but after Taehyung’s heat, you can understand her struggle.
”Tell him to give you some time to recover I’m sure he’ll understand. It needs to feel nice for you as well conceiving a child should be filled with lovemaking and not thinking about when he’ll jump your bones again.” Mina knows that you’re right but she’s afraid he’ll take it the wrong way and think that she changed her mind which she didn’t.
”I’ll talk to him tonight.” She tells you with conviction in her voice. When Mina is thinking she has this adorable pout on that just calls out to you to pinch them. The world is truly unfair to pair up two beautiful people like them to be mates. Now you can say that without meaning it as you snatched an equally as attractive mate for yourself. You can still hardly believe that you can associate your best friend with that word it seems too good to be true. Straight out of your dreams.
You arrive at the packhouse with Mina in different cars. She promised to drive you to your place after you leave Jungkook’s car just like you promised the boy that he won’t be late for the gym the next morning since you hogged his only means of transport. You call bullshit but in the end, you still let him have his bratty way. Mina is immediately swept off her feet by Jimin he could smell her from miles away. You could never surprise werewolves as their nose is so sensitive to smells after the first five tries you gave up organising surprise parties as they were never surprised to see you.
”Hi baby.” You blacked out for a minute when Taehyung pecked your lips to greet you. It’s something you’re looking forward to getting used to. You smile at each other like fools but what can you say. You are a happy fool.
”I’m still in shock that Y/N and Taehyung are a thing now.” Jimin next to you giggles into her girlfriend’s neck.
”Yeah can you go back to your oblivious pinning? I’m getting sick of these Lovely Dovey couples all around me.” Jungkook interjects but there’s no real bite to his words you know that he’s happy for the both of you. It doesn’t mean he’s not going to tease the shit out of the both of you.
”I smell a Y/N. Is that-” Jin emerges from the room next door with a neatly tied apron around his waist. He stops to regard you from head to toe sniffing the air before his eyes go big. ”Why do I smell Taehyung’s cum on you?” The horror on your face makes the males around you laugh so hard that Hoseok who has been silent so far rolls down the sofa holding his stomach. Even Mina joins in rather than helping you to save some of your dignity in front of your friends.
”But I showered twice!” You shrink under their gazes as a last resort you bury your face into Taehyung’s t-shirt who finally tells the boys to stop with their teasing. Ohhs and ahhs filling the air as he scoops in to play the knight in shining armour for you.
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©️ HELENAZBMRSKAI
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jungkxook · 9 months ago
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—backseat serenade. (m)
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⟶ pairing: taehyung x reader
⟶ genre: punk!taehyung / band au / brother’s best friend au + smut 
⟶ words: 10,790
⟶ rating: 18+
⟶ summary: falling in love and having weekly sex with kim taehyung is wrong for a number of reasons — and, no, that’s not including the whole other issue that he’s also your brother’s best friend
⟶ warnings: multiple sex scenes, slight exhibitionism if u look hard enough, wall sex, car sex, unprotected sex, all the sex (seriously), fingering, pussy slapping (also if u look hard enough), lots of teasing, doggy style, riding, creampie
⟶ disclaimer: this story is another repost of an old one (although it’s basically been entirely rewritten lol)!  
⟶ this is part of the melodrama tour series!
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“We have to hurry. I don’t have a lot of time.”
Taehyung says this with much difficulty, of course, especially when considering you’re currently pressed up against him, his fingers digging crescent-moons into your hips ━ but he knows you’re teasing him now.
You can’t help it, though; he just makes it so easy for you.
He can be so stubborn and impatient at times that poking fun at him brings you quite a bit of joy. Maybe not so much to him, as he often whines and complains that you like to torture him, but, really, how could you not? When you think about what he’s usually like in bed, away from prying eyes, it’s entirely different. So to see that dominance in him fade into nothing short of helpless is simply satisfying ━ even if you know you’ll pay for it at a later time. It doesn’t always happen either but when it does, you bask in it for as long as possible.
Which is why you seem to take the liberty of “torturing” him so sweetly now, just before the boys are about to play a gig at a bar late one night. Taehyung had found you the moment he and the boys had finished soundchecking for the evening, then had you pinned up against the brick wall of the dingy washroom, his hips digging harshly into yours, and his hand now gripping your thigh around his waist. It might have been you who instigated it, hooded eyes and fluttering lashes and shit-eating grins meeting him in secret from across the room as he stood on stage before you with his bass guitar in hand, but Taehyung was the one to put it into action just like he always does, pulling you in there even despite the fact that they were scheduled to play in twenty minutes.
But who could blame you? Taehyung is always so charming, and tonight he was looking extra irresistible. Maybe it was the silky blouse, the first few buttons left open so that the floral tattoo on his chest pokes through, leaving very little to the imagination, or maybe it was the way he had let his hair grow out a little longer than usual, soft dark curls pushed back by a single bandana.
“You’ll be late,” You warn him in between heated kisses as he pecks his way down to the underside of your jaw where he tongues a warm pattern there.
“Just a quickie,” Taehyung promises gruffly. His hips rut against yours again and you feel his straining erection against your inner thigh. Poor thing. “Been dying all day to feel you on my dick.”
You only hum in response, a small amused smirk plastered on your face. He’s sucking a hickey onto your neck when he speaks next.
“Had all these thoughts but I was all alone. It was terrible.”
“What kind of thoughts?” You pry, quirking a brow. Your fingers toy at the top of his belt buckle, pulling him towards you. “Let me guess. Were you thinking about what it feels like to have my mouth on you? All warm and wet.”
He doesn’t move a muscle when he feels your hand trail lower past his belt only to grab at his crotch through the rough material of his jeans. You press your palm against him and he hisses.
“Sucking you off nice and slow, just how you like it?” You probe, teeth tugging at his lower lip when he catches your mouth on his once more. Your voice is low and sultry and invokes something in him that has him tensing. “Or maybe the way it felt when you had me bent over your kitchen counter the other day. You know, you always make me feel so good, Tae━”
He growls against your mouth but the harsh sound dissolves into a strangled whine. “Don’t start something you can’t finish, love.”
“And I always love when you pull at my hair too━” But you continue on as if he hadn’t even spoken, the thrill of the moment coursing through your veins like crackling electricity. “And when you grip my thighs so tightly when your head’s between my legs━”
“Y/N,” he says your name in a strained warning, bordering on a desperate beg if you listen close enough. He gets distracted when you suck delicately on a spot on his jawline and has to take a few deep breaths to calm his nerves. “Please. I’ll do anything. Just let me fuck that pretty mouth of yours.”
“My mouth?” You ask, tantalizingly slowly. “Or me?”
“I’m a simple man, I just wanna cum,” he hums, earning a delighted snort from you. “I’ll take whatever you give me, Y/N, please.”
“Hmm…” You trail off. You press your palm a little harder against him, rubbing your hand across his length. “Think I want you inside me, Tae. Wanna be wrecked by you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Now, this seems to excite him to no end. He fumbles with his belt at once. A devious cackle meets his ears and he knows you’re purposely toying with him. The next few moments unfold in a blur as his eager hands join with your own nimble ones, having his belt undone in a matter of seconds and your skirt hitched up nearly to your waist. With one hand gripping his straining and leaking cock as he pulls himself free from his pants, the other hitches one of your thighs to his waist. He pushes into you at once, the familiar feeling of your wet walls coaxing him in further and further as he sinks against your chest entirely, a beautiful luscious moan falling from his lips and a hiss of glee from yours. And, then, all at once, it’s as if all the pressure that has been building up inside of him tumbles to the forefront to be released.
“Jesus, fuck,” he grunts. He buries his head against your chest, one hand feverishly grasping at your breasts from under your shirt, fortunate you chose to forgo a bra for the night.
“Ooh, Tae━” Your own arms wrap around his neck, holding him tightly to you, but you don’t think he’ll bother going very far when his own weight slumps against you entirely, pressing you against the wall roughly. And even though he’s quick to fuck himself into you, his hips hardly stray far from yours too, causing you to bob violently up and down the wall behind you, the rough brick structure scratching at your flesh paling in comparison to the cool metallic rings on his fingers holding you up and the burn between your legs as his cock stretches you open.
“Nice to know that’s all I am to you━” Your head falls back against the wall as he continues. “Something you can use to get off. Not that I mind.”
“Nah, that’s not all you are to me,” Taehyung sharply inhales, and then shudders. In the heat of the moment, you miss the sentiment in his voice. He lifts his head to yours finally, smothering your lips with his. “But your pretty little cunt sure is nice.”
A maniacal cackle bubbles at your throat as you nip at his lower lip. Before you can respond, outside the washroom Jimin’s voice can be heard calling out aimlessly for Taehyung as the boy most likely wanders by, oblivious to what’s unfolding only a few feet away from him. “Has anyone seen Tae? Taehyung! Get your ass back here or we’re gonna be late━”
Taehyung groans out of frustration and buries his face in the crook of your neck, grumbling angrily, “Fuckin’ hell.”
But despite the Jimin’s close proximity and despite Taehyung’s bitter resentment for it, his hips still continue to rut into yours. You do manage to pull apart from his mouth and giggle when he chases after your lips desperately. “Think that’s your cue, baby.”
“There’s no way you’d be that evil,” he protests like a whining child.
“But Jimin sounds pissed.”
Taehyung finds it hard to focus when your fingers tug at the collar of his shirt, absentmindedly (or so he thinks) running your hands under his shirt and over his chest. He cradles you close to him, following your every move. That, and the way your walls clench around him drives him wild. “Heaven forbid we let down Jimin.”
“Nnng━” You choke back a whimper. “He’ll be mad.”
“As if he wouldn’t already lose his shit if he found me here in such a compromising position with you being that you’re his sister.”
Compromising is certainly one word for it. So, maybe Taehyung had a point, but that never stopped him or you before. In fact, it only seemed to add to your lustful endeavours, as if you both enjoyed seeing how far you could push the boundaries before getting caught ━ or not.
It hadn’t always been like this. For a period of your life, you had somehow forced yourself to believe you had despised Taehyung as much as you claim, as much as you lie. You wondered just how Jimin could ever be friends with, or be as inseparable with, Taehyung as he was. Whereas Jimin is timid and shy, gentle and caring, like a soft breath of cool air on a hot summer’s day that sways the knee-high grass in meadows behind your house, Taehyung is energetic and effervescent, reckless and wild, akin to that of a sudden flash of lightning that breaks apart the calm sky, a clap of thunder that shakes even the very core of sleeping Gaia. Though, somehow, their two vastly different personalities come clashing together in a harmonious perfection and create something that is entirely too rambunctious for you to handle, even as a young child.
But now? Now you’re positive neither you nor Taehyung would stand a chance against Jimin’s wrath if he found out his best friend enjoyed weekly sex of all sorts with you, sometimes even when he’s asleep in the next room over in your shared apartment with him and Taehyung had somehow managed to sneak in during the night.
“You know he’s already suspicious,” You moan as his cock angles upward into you in such a way that makes your body tremble. You jut your hips forward, meeting his halfway. “Now━ Fuck, Tae━ you wanna… You wanna risk getting kicked from the band for not showing up to your set?”
“There’s still ten minutes,” he hisses hotly. “Ten minutes is more than enough time.”
“Then you’ll really be late.”
“It adds to the rockstar brand, doesn’t it?” he asks hastily. “Fuck, baby. You’re so fucking wet and you’re teasing me?”
He’s met with a roll of your eyes, and then a drunken snicker as you retort, “Maybe being fashionably late will be more acceptable when you’re a big celebrity.”
“Did you find him?” Another voice suddenly sounds from outside, this time resembling Hoseok’s. Taehyung wonders how they haven’t heard either of you yet, the lewd wet noises of his cock burrowing into your cunt seeming to grow louder each time. Surely, you would have been caught by now had it not been for the thudding bass of the music playing at the bar.
“No,” Jimin grumbles, closer this time.
A dangerously loud whimper tumbles from your lips and Taehyung hurries to clamp his hand over your mouth. You’re fortunate when he does, clinging to his hand as he pumps himself into you. At the very least, no matter how cocky Taehyung got with you or how many times he teased the thought of getting caught, he would never actually risk facing Jimin’s mighty wrath. Still, he finds a way to have fun with it.
“Uh oh.” Taehyung meets your darkened stare, lids heavy, as his other hand leaves your thigh to stick between your legs, fingers rubbing circles against your clit. You know he does it on purpose, judging by the broadening smirk on his face when the added stimulation makes your hips jerk instinctively beneath him. He’s surprised when you hardly let out a noise, safe for a sudden gasp for air. “Not even one tiny moan? Come on, baby.”
“Fuck it. Wherever he is, he better know we’re on in ten!” Jimin’s voice carries back to the two of you. Then, a little more faintly as he wanders off, you can hear him grumble, “I swear to God, this asshole━”
“Wait, wait━” You rasp suddenly, twisting and turning beneath Taehyung and the boy stops at once. You try not to let your heart swoon at the way his hands are all soft and gentle as they touch you now, sliding his palm off your mouth if only for it to fall to your hips where he rubs at comfortingly.
He tries to ignore the way his cock twitches, shoved so deep within your walls. “What’s wrong?”
You slither from his grasp, unraveling your leg from his waist and delicately pushing him away, trying not to focus on the way your pussy throbs at the sudden missing warmth of his length. Taehyung is suddenly even more concerned, the poor boy gawking at you helplessly, his swollen cock completely forgotten as he fixes himself back into his jeans, his attention solely focused on you and your wellbeing now.
“What happened? Did I hurt you━”
“No,” You promise. “No, I just━” You look sheepish, and he wonders why, up until he sees you fidgeting with your skirt in an attempt to fix it and the mischievous twinkle flashing in your eyes. “I just figured maybe we shouldn’t risk it tonight. I mean, you heard Jiminie.” You pat Taehyung’s chest once, smoothing out the material of his now crumpled shirt. “So, I’ll see you out there.”
Taehyung blinks once. “What the fuck.”
It doesn’t seem to hit him at first; not until he spots your wicked grin as you lean past him to look at your reflection in the mirror, fixing your clothes and hair. You wipe at a smudge of lipstick in the corner of your mouth, and Taehyung gaps.
“Y/N, what the fuck?” he whines. Needy and desperate hands try to grab at you on your way to the door, but he ultimately lets you weave your way out of his reach. “What are you, the antichrist? Don’t be such a tease. I’ve got a problem that you helped start. It’s only fair if you help finish it.”
Admittedly, it is cruel. He looks both shameless and shameful, an exasperated and flustered expression to match the helpless state he’s in. Shirt askew on his shoulders, hair a wild mess, and his painfully obvious boner struggling against his jeans. You almost feel bad, until you realize you shouldn’t be. Because this is all it’s ever been between the two of you ━ sex, and more sex, no feelings attached, but lately something seems off…  Either way, Taehyung will get over it, and he’ll still come crawling back for more which is why you have no qualms when you leave. Just, maybe, not in the way you would like.
The last thing he sees of you before you flee the washroom for him to fend for himself is a seductive smirk and a wink being thrown over your shoulder as you remark innocently, prettily, “You have hands.”
And then you’re gone, leaving him alone in the dingy washroom. He doesn’t come out right away, though it leaves the restless boys that make his band awaiting him to speculate some more.
“He’s gonna totally screw us over if he doesn’t show up in the next two minutes,” Jimin is saying hotly to the boys behind the stage when you rejoin them. The bar is already filling up with partygoers but mostly fans of the band, eagerly anticipating the set.
“Relax, Jimin,” Namjoon says carelessly. “He’s probably getting blown in the washroom or something. Can’t rush a man through these things.”
Jimin rolls his eyes as the others snicker. When the others have distracted themselves by discussing other business, you approach your brother casually, saying as inconspicuous as possible yet reassuringly, “Everything will be fine. I’m sure he’ll be here any second.”
“Wouldn’t be surprised if he throws this all away for a girl,” Jimin shakes his head. “It’s a miracle he ━ or any of the guys, for that matter ━ hasn’t tried anything on you yet.”
You try to laugh, though the sound is more forced and strained than you would like. At least Jimin doesn’t seem to notice. “But he’s your friend. Don’t you trust him?”
“I do trust him,” Jimin replies. “He’s a good guy, he’s just too caught up in all this band life. We’ve both seen it with the guys, especially with Taehyung. They take advantage of this stuff in the early stages.”
“Well, you don’t have to worry,” You promise. “I’m not interested in your friends and never will be ━ especially not Taehyung.”
Fortunately, the dreaded conversation doesn’t last much longer. Taehyung does end up making it to his own set on time, and when he finds you out in the crowd, you’re smirking deviously up at him for a secret that never has to be told aloud to the world and certainly not to Jimin.
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You don’t quite remember when you and Taehyung started hooking up behind your brother’s back or what exactly caused it.
If you think back long and hard enough, you’re positive it was the result of some sort of drunken one night stand that elapsed into sober days and conscious decision making, which then turned into weeks, then months, which leaves you to where you are now. Almost a year of sucking your brother’s best friend’s dick and you’ve somehow, miraculously, never been caught. But aside from occasionally sleeping with one another, there was nothing more to be exposed to Jimin in terms of romance. Because, as far as he was aware, you and Taehyung were still embroiled in your childhood rivalry with one another that was less violent now than when you were younger and more civil, aside from the offhanded jabs and retorts shot at one another. And, as far as Taehyung and you were aware, the charade and the hook-ups all resulted in a peculiar sort of friendship between the two of you that was certainly as far as either of you would take things. Supposedly.
But between sexual teasing and taunts, you sometimes wonder if the lines have begun to blur, and if you’ve gotten too comfortable with Taehyung asking to sleep in your bed. Which is why, maybe, you overcompensate by “torturing” him on the days that he really needs you, like the night before in the grimy washroom of the bar. He hadn’t joined the real world or the band until the very last second they were meant to go on stage, looking all the more discomposed and flushed in the face when he rushed out, though at least he had somehow managed to tame his raging boner.
Now you were certain the universe was toying with you, bittersweet payback coming to nip you in the ass.
You hadn’t been so bothered the night before, leaving with the boys when their set was done and returning to your home with Jimin, not a word being uttered between you and Taehyung, even up until the very next day where you find yourself now. Crammed in a local studio run by some friend Yoongi had known from college, you were quite used to watching the band brainstorm new lyrics and record songs in real time, all from the sofa shoved up against one wall of the small space. You had been there every step of the way ━ their first rehearsal as a formed band, the day they discovered the group’s name in almost a dreamlike epiphany, the release of their very first full-length album produced and recorded all by them and promoted all by them, their very first gig with a decent following and the jittery anxiety they had all been troubled by, and every gig following it in which their nerves subsided and their effervescent charm and credence began to finally show through. But they had never been as disconcerted as they had now ━ which, really, you don’t blame them.
“Bro, this is stressing me out.” This aggravated groan sounds from Jungkook, the band’s lead guitarist.
He’s currently splayed out on the ground of the sofa you’re seated on, head thrown back against the cushions. Every other boy in the studio bare a similar wearied look ━ even Jimin, as their usual spritely lead singer.
You suppose that’s just the inevitable stress bound to occur when a scout from the infamous Columbia Records had somehow found the band either in person at one of their gigs or online and taken an interest in them and were interested in signing them. After weeks of back and forth discussion, Jin had been fortunate enough to land a meeting with the label in New York City, looking promising enough to excite even the stoic Yoongi. And after a month of planning, their meeting was set to take place finally only a week from that day. The issue seemed to arise when the label claimed they wanted the band to bring a set of new songs to the table to discuss at the last possible moment, sending the boys into a chaotic frenzy as they had only just released their first album a few months back. You had come to help the boys, though they were lucky enough to have found a handful of pre-written songs from their repertoire that still, unfortunately, needed fine tuning, vocals, and melodies. After working meticulously all morning, they were only just now deciding to split for a much needed lunch break.
“Same here,” Jimin says glumly, rubbing at his tired eyes. “Can’t wait to get out of here. I feel like I’m going insane.”
As the boys begin to shift and move, Jin gets to his feet and clasps his hands onto Jimin’s shoulders, giving him a reassuring nudge. “Just think about it: international success and Grammys await.”
“If we don’t fall apart before then,” Namjoon stifles a yawn as he stretches out his arms. He tosses a glance at you and Taehyung. “You guys coming?”
“Yeah,” You say, though you hardly move from your seat. “I’ll be there.”
“I’ll catch up with you guys in a minute,” Taehyung nods. He’s sat across from you on the couch, journal propped on one knee as he scrawls away in it, a jarble of chord progressions and lyrics. “Just gonna finish cleaning up in here.”
It seems convincing enough to Namjoon and the rest of the boys, even Jimin who is already out the door, not in the least bit suspicious of you or Taehyung. Honestly, you’re sure not even Taehyung is suspicious of your unmoving presence beside him until the boys leave and suddenly the room falls silent.
“You’re stressed,” You point out in a gentle musing. Which is true. You don’t usually see Taehyung riddled with anxieties, typically keeping to himself and maintaining some sort of effortless and mysterious coolness around the others.
The boy quirks a brow as he lifts his gaze to look up at you, tossing the journal onto the ground. Whether or not he seems to catch the underlying suggestive and sultry tone in your voice, you’re not quite sure but could you really blame yourself? It was difficult having to watch Taehyung all morning in his element, gazing at him whenever he was in the recording booth, headphones dangling from his neck and bass guitar in his lap as his expert fingers thrummed away at the strings. He always looks most attractive to you when he’s so utterly consumed by his work and his art, whether it be on stage in front of hundreds of people or in a more intimate setting at recordings or practices.
“What happened to you not wanting to disappoint Jimin by getting caught or whatever it was?” he asks, waving his hand dismissively. “Staying back with me is definitely gonna catch his attention.”
“Maybe,” You shrug. You catch his hand as he brings it back down, raising it to your lips to kiss at the tips of his fingers slowly, one-by-one, never once breaking eye contact with him. “I was just thinking you could use some help. And an apology for yesterday.”
Despite the way Taehyung’s dark gaze scrutinizes you in a taunting manner, he still watches as you take his hand and place it between your thighs, over your core. At least today you chose to wear leggings, the smooth material allowing for very little obstacles standing in his way as you press his fingers against you. A wolfish smirk tugs at his lips. “You think your pussy’s gonna help me?”
“Yes, actually, I do,” You say, matter-of-fact. “And I don’t think it will; I know. If I remember correctly, you were begging to use me as a stress-reliever before your set yesterday.”
Taehyung clucks his tongue. “Sounds a lot to me like you just want my fingers in you. Not so nice now being the needy one, huh?”
“I want you to do a lot of things to me, Tae.”
“Careful, baby. You’re playing a dangerous game,” Taehyung says. Still, he entertains the idea. Pressing his thumb harder against you, he rubs leisurely at the sensitive part of your clit over your clothes and the sudden feeling makes you pur with glee. “Besides, why should I be so nice and help you after what you did to me?”
You roll your eyes. “You’re still on about that? You’re a grown man, you can pleasure yourself.”
“How mean.” He feigns a look of mock hurt. “It doesn’t feel as nice when it isn’t you.”
“Taehyung,” You scold his name in a warning, but it mostly comes out as a contented sigh. You know you’ve already won him over, though the impatient tug you give on his arm as you clutch at his wrist of the hand still between your legs is a wordless reminder. Your fingers flutter up to his face, pulling him down for a kiss which he gladly obliges to. “Think they’ll walk in?”
“Nah.” His voice is a throaty murmur. “We’ve got some time. The boys’ seem worried enough as is; think they’re already halfway to that pho place around the corner they wanted to try, and they’re probably not gonna wanna come back here for at least another hour. Plus, I think we’ve given the producers a raging headache with all our requests so they definitely won’t want to be back in here for a while.”
You snicker at the thought, humming into his mouth as you pull him down with you onto the sofa, bending your knee so as to let him slide into place between your legs more comfortably. He pulls his hand away from you only long enough to lick at his digits before slipping his hand past the waistband of your leggings this time. Nudging aside your underwear, he swipes his fingers at your clit, marveling at your stickiness.
Your breath hitches in your throat. “What do we say when they ask where we went?”  
“Doesn’t matter,” he grunts into your mouth. “Fuck, tell them we were busy fucking for all I care.”
You swat at his chest playfully but lose your spirit when he presses his thumb against your clit, causing your hips to rut forward in a silent plea. Taehyung’s right, you think. Your excuse for the boys can be worried about later. Now, Taehyung slides a finger into you, then another, stretching you open experimentally, causing you to croon.
Face warm and head spinning, a sudden thought pops into your head that seems much more intimate than his fingers in you. “So━” You bite your lip to stop a moan. The question that forms on your tongue is timid despite the lewd things that threaten to run through your mind at his every touch, “S-So, what happens when you’re a big and famous rockstar, touring the world now?”
“I’ll take you with me.” Taehyung tongues a pattern down to the underside of your jaw, sending shivers down your spine. He curls his fingers upward, sinking further into you until he’s reached his knuckles, enjoying the way your hips twitch beneath him. “Fuck you in every city we go to, in every fancy, over-the-top hotel we stay in. New York, L.A., Paris, London, Rome…”
“Romantic,” You snort, although maybe it kind of is if you think about it long enough. He slides a third finger into you then, fucking his digits in and out of you at a gradual pace that has your core aching. You’re all warm and wet around him that it goes straight to his dick, the thought of him tearing you apart as he plunges his cock into you making him grow antsy. It does the same to you. “Nnngh, Taehyung━ We’ll see about that when you meet pretty girls thousands of miles away who can offer you so much more than me.”
“Hmm… Dunno about that,” he hums. “There’s only gonna be you.”
You wonder if he knows what he’s doing, the way his words make your heart stutter in your chest. But then you start to wonder why you’re even feeling such things for him. Pretty words promising you that you meant more to him than sex meant little to you in comparison when he never acted upon it ━ but could you blame him? Even you were apprehensive of ruining what you already had with him, his friendship with Jimin if you told him how you were feeling lately, and the integrity of the band.
Your legs tremble as your orgasm approaches. Taehyung busies himself by nipping and sucking at your neck and all you can do is puff and pant, the lewd wet noises of his fingers penetrating you filling your ears. “Taehyung━ God, I wanna feel your dick so badly.”
“Yeah?” he growls. “Gonna let me fuck you finally? You’re so wet right now, could slip right in. Fuck, look at what you do to yourself by being so mean to me.”
He twists his finger up into you in such a way that has you grinding against his knuckles. “Please, Tae━”
“Got you stretched so wide too,” Taehyung hums pensively. “Your pussy always takes me so well too, doesn’t it?”
“Hmm, Taehyung!”
“Look at you,” he hisses, quickening his pace. Your back arches until your chest is pressed flush against his, walls quivering around his fingers. You reach out desperately for his face, smoothing your lips over his but you fail to really make any sort of connection. Instead, your jaw unhinges in a breathless moan against his mouth as he rests his forehead against yours. “Wanna come around my fingers so badly, don’t you? So close too.”
“Fuck, fuck, I’m━” Your hands ball into fists around the collar of his shirt. Your eyes threaten to roll back as you get closer and closer, your aching pussy so close to feeling its much needed relief when━ “What the fuck, Taehyung?”
He pulls his hand from your core before you can cum, leaving you a sweating and panting mess. The sudden loss of contact leaves you dumbfounded, gawking at the boy who’s suddenly grinning in a similar ungodly manner to your selfish response to him the day before. Payback has never tasted so sweet before to him, and so bitter to you.
“You did that on purpose,” You whine, jutting your hips forward desperately to meet his hand again. Instead, he gives your leaking and sensitive pussy one slap, the pleasant jolt shooting up your spine making you moan. “You’re so mean. I thought you were over it.”
“Well, now I am.” He pulls his hand out from between your legs and licks at his fingers. “Have you had your fun?”
It takes you a moment to respond as you gather yourself. He finds your sulking a little hilarious, and maybe also feels a little bad. “For now.”
“That’s a good girl.” He leans down to kiss your mouth hungrily, enjoying when you suck eagerly at his lower lip. “Because I’ve had my fun.”
You open your mouth to say something more but are stopped shortly when, somewhere outside the recording room, you can hear the sound of footsteps rapidly approaching, followed by the sound of the doorknob turning and Jimin’s curious voice, “Tae?”
You and Taehyung have stumbled off of one another within seconds, listening to the way Taehyung curses under his breath as he flings himself off the couch and a few feet away as you sit upright on the sofa. You have to only pray and hope that you both don’t look too obvious, though you think it’s too late for that. Either way, you cross one thigh over the other, biting down harshly on your tongue as Jimin stumbles into the room. As his gaze sweeps fleetingly across the room, he hardly takes note of both you and Taehyung.
“There you two are,” he says. “Was wondering where you went off to. And━” His stare flutters over to Taehyung for a moment and you hold your breath, fearing he may know a little too much, when━ “There’s my wallet! I knew I forgot it here.”
He crosses the room swiftly and plucks his abandoned wallet from the desk, holding it up to show the two of you. You smile nervously and Taehyung takes it upon himself to answer, clearing his throat in the process. “We were just gonna catch up with you, actually. Y/N was just helping me finish up here.”
You’re fortunate that Jimin’s probable sudden panic of trying to find his wallet and the relief of realizing he hadn’t lost it to the ether is what distracts him. He seems hardly intrigued by your lack of presence or yours and Taehyung’s odd companionship without the other boys. Whatever the case, you both manage to make it out of the recording studio unscathed and Taehyung does a well enough job at deflecting from any further suspicions by talking as normally as he usually would with Jimin on your walk over to the restaurant the rest of the boys are at.
Well, as unscathed as you can be, the tragedy of your lost orgasm still haunting you even as you sit across from Taehyung at the table.
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“Now you’ll really be late.”
You say this as a heedful warning, though you’re fortunate when you find that you’re both distracted this time.
You know you have Taehyung under your spell that morning when he catches you purposely wandering his apartment in nothing but a pair of your panties. It’s not as if it’s uncommon to see you naked in his kitchen, making breakfast. That morning, when you walk into the bedroom holding a cup of tea, Taehyung almost chokes at the sight of your bare chest. It’s early the day of the band’s flight to New York City for their meeting with Columbia Records, and though Taehyung has roughly an hour before he has to leave the apartment, you’re worried he might just miss the flight altogether when he pulls you onto his bed again after a night of fucking.
“Don’t care. Come here.” His large hands are on you in an instant, roaming your body as he kisses the underside of your jaw and pins you beneath him. You let him get carried away, let him leave a trail of sloppy kisses from your lips down to your collarbones and in between your breasts.
“What are you gonna tell the boys when they’re on a flight to New York and you’re still in your apartment?” You rasp, fingers threading in his hair.
“Was busy spending the last twenty-four hours making hot, passionate love to you.”
The wry grin on his face makes it come across as a joke and makes your heart skip a beat. Admittedly, that was partly the truth. He had invited you over the day before and you had spent the better part of it in his bed in every position imaginable. Have to make up for the three days we won’t see each other, he had said after your first round, head between your legs and mouth on your cunt.
You snicker now but the sound falls short when a moan replaces it. “Don’t think you can call it passionate love making when you gave up halfway and made me ride you like you always do.”
He gasps and bites down teasingly on your skin but not with enough pressure to hurt. “Was that a jab at my manhood?”
“Of course not.”
“Besides, I like it best when you’re in charge.”
You roll your eyes but pull him up to your face so that you can kiss him again. It’s an odd shift in atmosphere when you find him kissing you in a chaste manner, despite having marked you red all over and legs still shaking from how many times he’s made you come in the last twenty-four hours. But it wasn’t all sex for once. Falling asleep in his arms left you still dreaming even when you were long awake.
“Gonna miss you,” he whispers once he parts from you. He rubs soft circles against your hips, nuzzling his nose against your cheek.
“It’s only for three days,” You say.
“I know,” he sighs. “I just━ God, I’ve gotten so used to you being here. I’m just sick of sleeping alone all the time. Shit, I don’t think I’m making any sense anymore. All I know is you’re driving me crazy.”
“Taehyung…”
“Am I wrong to feel that way?” He lifts his head now to look at you, ardent sincerity glazing over his eyes as he gazes at you.
You’re too caught up in the moment, the lustful afterglow of sex and whatever else is starting to emerge however blurry it may be now, to not notice right away the sound of knocking on the front door. Instead, you reach out to push his hair out of his eyes. You think you know what he means; you just want to hear him say it aloud. Your question is a gentle probe. “What are you trying to say?”
“I━”
But Taehyung’s voice is cut short by the sound of Jin’s shouting from the front door. “Taehyung, you in here?”
Wide eyes meet with yours in the sudden alarming panic of Jin’s arrival. Taehyung grumbles mostly to himself, “God dammit, what’s he doing here?”
You can hear the band’s manager talking aloud, quite possibly to another one of the boys that he’s dragged with him, and you and Taehyung scramble to react. Taehyung only has enough time to clamber out of his bed and pull on a pair of discarded sweatpants from the floor as you pull on one of his sweaters and grab the bedsheet to cling to your chest if only so it can hide the rest of your bare legs.
“Are you alive?” Jin’s asking, closer this time.
“We had to come check on you━” You don’t register the second voice until it’s too late.
Because there, standing at the threshold of Taehyung’s door to his room, is not just Jin but your brother. Jimin’s familiar pop of bright blue hair and nonchalant smile are much too hard to forget. But, upon stumbling across Taehyung’s room, they each come to a stuttering halt. It doesn’t take long for the realization to dawn on them ━ and how could they not piece together the puzzles painting such a painfully obvious picture? The dishevelled bed, the clothes that litter his floor, your clothes that litter his floor, Taehyung’s shirtless and sloppy attire, your own half-hearted attempt at dressing yourself and the marks that riddle your body that you were banking on fading completely by the time you were reunited with Jimin after their return from their meeting.
“Uh…” Taehyung trails off awkwardly. “What are you guys doing here?”
“Oh shit,” Jin curses under his breath. Despite having no idea whatsoever about you or Taehyung (though maybe having a better inkling than the rest of the boys), he turns hastily towards Jimin. “Maybe now’s not a good time.”
But Jimin hardly budges. Instead, he looks enlivened, jaw setting harshly in place as his brows furrow into a scowl. “Jin knows I have a spare key to your place after that one time you locked yourself out and he wanted to make sure we all met up before getting to the airport. You weren’t answering our calls, thought you were dead. Guess now I know it’s because you were too busy fucking my sister.”
“Jimin,” You hiss sharply.
Taehyung shakes his head wildly. “It’s not like that.”
“Really?” Jimin retorts. “‘Cause it sure seems like it is.”
Taehyung grimaces. “Okay, yes, but not in the way you think. It’s not some meaningless fuck. I care about her.”
But that only seems to be the wrong answer. Would there ever be a right one? Taming Jimin’s stubborn anger and protectiveness over you was hard enough on any other day. Now that he knows you’ve slept with Taehyung, Taehyung felt as if he were a lost cause.
“How long has this been happening?” Jimin asks, tight-lipped.
You can’t bring yourself to answer, neither can Taehyung, and that seems to be enough to answer his worries. Maybe if you had acted faster, said it was only a one night stand, he wouldn’t have been able to read your mind so easily. Yet your silence was enough to make you guilty.
“Shit,” Jimin runs a hand through his hair. When he speaks next, he’s looking only at you. “Do you love him?”
“I━” You open your mouth, as if to explain yourself. This time, the answer came much easier. You know what you want to say, but voicing the truth out loud in front of your brother and Taehyung, who might not feel the same way, makes you clamp your mouth shut. Whatever your answer anyway should be for Taehyung only. Instead, you frown up at your brother. “I don’t get why you’re so upset anyway. Who cares if we’re in love? Who cares what we are? It’s not like you can control me. I can make these sorts of decisions myself, Jimin. This is ridiculous.”
“No. I get that,” Jimin says firmly. “But you’re my sister, and your wellbeing comes first to me. So, Tae━” Now, your brother turns to look at Taehyung. You’ve never seen him so furious before, disappointed even, and certainly not when it comes to Taehyung. “If you care about her so much, when were you gonna let her know?”
This seems to catch your attention, sending a curious gaze between Jimin and Taehyung. “Let me know what?”
“That he’s been screwing some other chick he met at the bar a while ago,” Jimin says. “Walked in on them once by accident and, after the fact, he said some similar bullshit about how it wasn’t meaningless or whatever.”
You blink.
The blow to your chest, and subsequently your heart, makes you teeter on your frail legs. Because if what Jimin was saying was true, then were all the sweet sentiments Taehyung whispered to you even yours to begin with? Did he care about you as much as you cared about him? But, the worst part of it all, is how utterly foolish you feel. Because when Taehyung doesn’t immediately answer, your question about whether or not Jimin was telling the truth was confirmed; and you had let yourself almost willingly fall for Taehyung despite all the warning signs. Despite the fact that you had both initiated your relationship on the basis that nothing would ever blossom from it.
“Is that true?” You ask Taehyung.
The boy hesitates. He meets your stare solemnly, flinching when he notes just how hurt you seem. “Partly.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You demand. But before he can respond, you scoff under your breath as you begin to gather your belongings. “Oh my god. I’m so stupid━”
Taehyung starts. “Wait, Y/N━”
“Just leave her alone━” Jimin interrupts.
“Hey. Hey!” Jin snaps abruptly, the firm tone in his voice catching the boys’ attention. “We gotta go. Now. Taehyung, get yourself decent; Jimin, in the living room. We leave for the airport in five minutes.”
You decide you no longer want to wait for an answer. Your own embarrassment is far too much to handle for the moment being, and you favour the idea of fleeing from Taehyung’s sorrowful gaze, Jimin’s heated one, and Jin’s scrutinizing scowl.
You’re long gone before Taehyung can even think to stop you.
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The three days in which the boys find themselves in New York City for their meeting with Columbia Records is the longest three days of your life.
Taehyung never bothers to call or text you ━ and the looming swell of concern of awaiting to hear his voice or your brother’s or any answer of how the meeting has gone fades in comparison. Because every sweet nothing he ever said to you suddenly means nothing, and you don’t know where that leaves you.
Just when you think you can take the torture no longer, the band returns. Jimin comes bounding into your shared apartment the moment his flight lands and the taxi has brought him home, greeting you with the wonderful news that the band’s been signed, and a celebration is in store consisting of their closest friends and family members. While you initially bask in Jimin’s excitement, mirroring your own, it quickly fades as you fear you’ve lost Taehyung for good.
“You’ll come to the party, won’t you?” Jimin asks hopefully at some point. “The boys will want you there.”
You shift warily in your seat on the sofa across from your brother who stands in the midst of the room after having animatedly relaying the story of the past three days to you. You shrug now, and when Jimin shoots you a quizzical look, you decide to approach the topic cautiously, dancing over your words slowly. “I dunno, Jimin. If he’s gonna be there… I don’t know if I can face him right now.”
Jimin comes to an immediate halt. His face falls and he sinks onto the seat beside you. “Y/N… Look, I was wrong, and I’m sorry. While we were away, Taehyung and I talked and he’s gutted about what happened. But that’s all I can say. I think you should talk to each other. No, I want you to talk to each other. I know now that you’re meant for one another.”
“Are you only telling me this because you’re being your best friend’s wingman, or because you’re being my brother?” You ask, a weak lighthearted attempt at a joke.
“Both,” Jimin says warmly. “Because I care about you both, and I don’t want to have to live with the regret of being the reason two people perfect for each other aren’t together.”
And when your brother says it with such earnestness, you have no choice but to believe him.
So, despite feeling like a fool for potentially crossing paths with Taehyung again, you muster the nerve and motivation to go, and arrive at the party with Jimin later that night. The impromptu last minute party itself is held at Namjoon’s home, filled to the brim with mostly familiar faces and a few unrecognizable ones that must be acquaintances of the boys you’ve never met before. You make your rounds and congratulate the boys one-by-one, being enveloped into a tight hug with each one, safe for Taehyung whom you don’t see at first.
You’re fortunate when mutual friends of yours and Jimin’s arrive, spending the majority of the night with them as your brother wanders off to get wasted. At some point, as the night drawls on, you catch sight of Taehyung and the presence of him is enough to dampen your mood entirely. You decide you’re no longer in the mood for a party, and make haste for the door, stumbling out onto the lawn. You only make it so far, coming to stop at the foot of the curb to breathe in the cool night air around you, before you notice Taehyung hurrying out after you, calling your name.
Almost as soon as he’s able to catch his breath and you lock gazes with the boy, he asks aloud, “Where are you going?”
You hadn’t expected him to follow you, nor the terrible nearly tangible awkwardness that hangs heavy in the air. Still, the concern in his voice and the corners of his eyes softening at the sight of you makes you want nothing more than to forget all the heartache. “Home.”
“Let me drive you?” he asks delicately.
You hesitate before responding. You know the simple offer of a drive is more than that. It’s an invitation to talk to him, sort things out. And you, of course, can’t possibly deny him. As soon as you’ve followed him to his car and he starts driving, everything goes silent. It’s almost unbearable as you shift uncomfortably in your seat and gaze out the window, hoping the long car ride will pass by rather quickly. You thwart his attempts at starting any conversation by turning the radio up and letting the music ━ a mix from Taehyung’s phone filled with pop-punk and indie classics ━ fill the emptiness but it doesn’t work with distracting you. He takes a detour from the path to your apartment, driving instead to a nearby lookout point of a hiking trail, now abandoned and desolate this late at night.
It’s quiet even long after he shifts the car into park, leaving only the sound of the stereo to fill the void. Then, at long last━
“You didn’t call,” You say.
Taehyung swallows thickly. “I know.”
“That’s all I wanted. An explanation.”
“I know,” Taehyung shifts in his seat to look at you. “I’m sorry. I messed up.”
“I know I have no right to feel like you’re mine when the reason we started seeing each other was casual, but everything you’ve been saying to me lately━” You rasp, “that I’m the only one for you and that you were gonna miss me because you were tired of being alone ━ did all of it mean nothing?”
The boy’s stare hardens. “No. I was never lying when I was with you. Everything I said, I meant.”
“Then why didn’t you call?”
“Because I was scared I had lost you,” Taehyung grovels all at once, silencing you. “Because things were starting to finally change between us ━ where it wasn’t just sex all the fucking time, but something genuine ━ and I didn’t want to face the reality that it could all be gone, just like that.”
“Well, what did Jimin mean, about that other girl? Was he telling the truth?”
“Yes.”
“Did you fuck her?”
“Yes.”
“And did you fuck her while you were still saying there was only me in your life and pretending you meant it?”
“I was never pretending,” Taehyung protests exasperatedly. “We had a fling, but that was months ago, when you and I first started whatever the hell this is. But Jimin was wrong. I never told him she was the one, or whatever. I said I didn’t want it to be meaningless anymore. That I want something more. I thought I had found it with that girl; but it was really with you.”
“Taehyung…” You whisper his name now, a delicate utterance.
“You can’t tell me I’m the only one feeling this way about us,” Taehyung beckons desperately. “I know you’ve been feeling it too.”
You purse your lips; then, you let out a small exhalation of air. “Tae… I think I’ve been in love with you ever since we were little kids.”
Now, Taehyung’s stare softens. He reaches out to grab at your face, gingerly pulling you into him, thumb caressing your cheek.
“I want you,” he promises. “God, I want you so bad. Do you really think I’d risk getting kicked from the band for anyone else but you? Or let anyone else tease me so bad but you?”
You can’t help but snicker. You shake your head at him as he pulls you into a kiss. He grins against your mouth and, this time when he kisses you, it’s hot and needy, a whole three day’s worth of pent up emotions and desires pouring into your every touch. Your hands fumble to undo your seatbelt and then you’re climbing over onto his lap and he’s welcoming you with open arms, the skirt of your dress hitching up higher on your thighs. Your knee, or maybe it was your foot or elbow, accidentally hits the horn of the steering wheel and startles the two of you, earning a squeak from you, before you both erupt into laughter. Taehyung reaches down to push the seat back a few inches to give you more space in the cramped driver’s seat and then he pauses to look up at you with mesmerized eyes. He kisses you again and again, as your hands come up to grasp at the sides of his neck.
“Had enough of the bullshit, have you?” he asks humorously. “Gonna take matters into your own hands?”
“I’m tired of all this teasing and chasing,” You pout. You’ve already begun grinding your hips against his, enjoying the way his face pinches in pure delight. He burrows his face into your chest, breasts soft against his head. A soft moan bubbles at your lips as you plant your own hands onto his chest. “I think so are you. We’ve both got a taste of it, haven’t we? We need to make up for lost time.”
“Fair enough,” he rasps. “What do you want from me, baby?”
“You, all of you,” You murmur. “Want your dick in me.”
“Gonna let me finish this time?” he tuts.
Your amused giggle meets his ears and he wonders how you can be both cute and sexy at the same time. “Mmm, I wanna be filled with your cum.”
“Oh, fuck,” Taehyung grunts. “Okay, okay. Here━”
Somehow, he’s able to gesture to the backseat and you and him clamber your way there until you’re finally both situated once more with you straddling his lap. There’s a mutual understanding that there’s no point, nor time, for foreplay but it’s not as if either of you mind. Taehyung’s surely had enough and so have you because while teasing him may be fun for a while, it certainly can feel like torture trying to stay away from him in the meantime. You help him fumble with the belt of his jeans so that he can unbuckle them and watch as he grasps at himself, pulling his cock free. Immediately, you’re lifting your hips to pull the skirt of your dress up higher and his hands help aid you clumsily, palms gliding up the smooth expanse of your thighs.
Then, fumbling to push you on your knees before him, with one hand on the small of your back, he pulls you towards him and gazes down between the two of you as he hooks a thumb over the material of your panties to push it to the side and teases the tip of himself over your slick folds. Your hands flail outward, palms pressing against the windowpane as he somehow situates himself behind you in the cramped space on his knees. He grunts from behind you at the feeling and then slowly and carefully guides you down onto him. It takes a moment to adjust but as you sink fully down until he’s balls deep, his cock coaxed easily by your leaking wetness, the both of you come to a halt, sputtering for air.
“Wait, wait,” he gasps. “Oh, fuck━ Stay put for a sec.”
“Why?” You ask, jutting your hips backwards teasingly. “Gonna cum already?”
“You’re such a fucking tease,” he mutters. He thrusts up into you without warning as payback, causing you to gasp out loud and flail forward. “No, you brat. I just want to enjoy it a little bit longer.”
He’s right. It does feel nice to finally feel some sort of friction after three days of nothing. To him, you just feel so nice and warm and snug and, to you, he fills you up so perfectly. So you stay put for a little bit, adjusting to the feeling as you kiss each other slow and steadily. His dick twitches inside you, warm and wet and so fucking hard. He’s just so big, your head is spinning. It’s almost as if you feel him in the pit of your stomach, legs trembling at the feeling. He yanks impatiently at the top of your dress, pulling it down so that the material pools at your waist now, reveling in the way your bare breasts spring free. At once, his hands are reaching around your front to palm at your breasts, grasping at your hips and navel.
“Wanna wreck you so bad,” Taehyung growls roughly against the shell of your ear as he presses his chest against your back. “Gonna fill you up so good, make your pussy all mine. How does that sound?”
“Want it so bad,” You whine, one arm hooking behind you so that your fingers can scratch at his hair. “F-fuck, Taehyung━”
When he tugs lightly at your hips, you take that as his gesture for you to move and start grinding your hips against his.
“Been waiting so long,” he hisses. “Feels good, doesn’t it? Don’t know why you always gotta tease me.”
“Taehyung,” You choke out. “Oh, f-fuck━”
“That’s it, baby girl. Doing so well,” Taehyung grunts as your walls quiver around him. He starts grinding into you, rough snaps of his hips sending you jolting forward each time. “Gonna take my dick like a good girl?”
“Y-Yes━ God, want it so bad,” You cry out. “Give it to me harder, please, Taehyung━”
He gladly obliges, quickening his pace until he’s slamming his hips into yours in thrusts that tremble you to the core. Tears begin to prick at your eyes at the glorious sensation, your cunt throbbing with each thrust. You’re so wet, he almost slips from your walls each time he rolls his hips into yours.
“Fuck━ Want you to ride me,” he rasps at some point. “Show me how your pussy belongs to me. Can you do that for me?”
You nod blindly. You try not to whine at the sudden loss of contact when he pulls out of you, the tip of his cock glistening with both of your leaking cum mingling together, the sticky strands pulling apart midair as he fumbles. Soon, he has you straddling his lap, sinking onto his dick once more. You grip his shoulders this time, bouncing on him as he buries his face in your chest.
A sudden thought has him groaning aloud. “Your brother’s gonna fucking hate me.”
“I thought he said you talked things over,” You gasp. “That everything’s okay.”
“I don’t mean that,” Taehyung’s head rolls back, eyes squeezing shut. “He’s gonna murder me if he ever catches us like this.”
“Think he knows it happens by now,” You giggle. You moan when you drop your hips on him completely, swiveling around his dick.
“Still don’t think that means he wants to see us making love on the couch in your apartment. Not gonna be able to keep my hands off of you,” Taehyung points out. Then, adding hastily, “Fuck it. Can we not talk about your brother? It’s killing the mood.”
Another delightful chuckle bubbles from your lips though it’s quick to dissolve into a splintered cry as his dick angles upwards into you.
Your back arches until your chest is pressed against his. It’s almost embarrassing how fast the two of you become complete shambles, a sticky mess forming between your legs. It comes to that point where you don’t care about being careful and where you decide to adopt such a reckless pace, fucking yourself on him, your breasts bouncing wildly before him. Taehyung moans and eagerly latches his mouth on one of your breasts, sucking hard.
“Taehyung,” You whine. “I’m not gonna last.”
He hums against you, pulling you closer to his mouth and chest and wrapping you in his heat, as if to urge you on. Your mewls and whimpers ring in Taehyung’s ears as beautiful sounding as the music that plays in the background. You begin to give out, your tiredness mingling with the intensity of pleasure, and you collapse against Taehyung’s chest, huffing for air. He quickly replaces your efforts, grabbing your hips tightly and plummeting his upwards into yours so hard that you feel each thrust shake you to the core. You know you’ll have bruises in the morning but you don’t mind. You’re leaning entirely against Taehyung now, your arms wrapping around his neck, as cries of his name and choked whimpers continue to tear from your throat and mouth.
“F-Fuck!” You cry. “Taehyung, faster━ oh my god, please━”
Your pleas drown out when one long moan escapes you. You can feel the muscles in your core tighten and loosen in a constant battle that has your head swimming in a good way, your heart pounding in your chest. Taehyung grits his teeth, focusing on bringing you to your high, and, before you are able to even comprehend what’s happening, you’re toppling over the edge. You’re still on top of Taehyung, whimpering profusely and crying his name in a beautiful mantra as your high shakes you from head to toe.
“Fuck, that’s it, baby,” Taehyung hisses. “Cum for me. Cream all over my dick. You love it, don’t you? Love having me fill you up like this?”
“Yes, oh my god, Tae, yes━ faster, please━”
Taehyung obliges, sweat forming on his forehead. He feels you squeeze around him so tight that he fumbles for a second, sputtering for air. Then, he feels your cum pulsate out of you, leaking down his length. You’re instantly floating up high with the stars, relishing in your high and the way Taehyung rides it out as he also fights for his own sweet release. As your hips come to a stutter, he grips at your waist and pummels his dick up into your aching pussy.
His tongue continues to lav lazily at your jawline and, by the time he reaches his own high, you are beginning to cringe from the sensitivity. Yet, you hold on, pushing away the slight sting as you help coax him to his high, squeezing your muscles around him. He cums moments later, releasing into you warm and wet, crying your name.
“Fuck, Y/N━ Gonna fill you up, baby, just how you like it━”
He rams his hips up into yours for one final effort, shuddering in elation as his cock twitches every last drop of cum from it. Then, both breathless and panting, covered in a thin sheen of sweat, you slump against his chest, resting your forehead against his. The car instantly goes silent and the foreground music that was the radio comes to once more. You listen to the soft lyrics as the two of you bask in the afterglow of sex and he kisses you all over.
You don’t know how much time passes as the two of you lay there, his hands rubbing comforting circles on your hips as your own fingers trace the tattoos that ink his skin.
“You know━” Taehyung speaks up eventually, his voice a low mumble. “Gonna be extra hard not to be late getting to gigs now.”
“Uh oh.” You roll your eyes. “Think we’ve got all the time in the world now for sex, Tae.”
Taehyung grins. “I was thinking more about the fact that I’m not gonna want to get out of bed in the morning, whenever you fall asleep beside me.”
Your heart swells at his confession and you peck his cheek quickly before burying your face in the crook of his neck. It’s his own serenade of sorts, his small promise in the backseat of his car, that makes it all okay in the end.
“And,” Taehyung admits cheekily this time, “knowing we don’t have to keep us a secret anymore, even to ourselves━ I'm definitely not gonna be able to keep my hands off of you now.”
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⟶ All rights reserved to © jungkxook. I do not allow reposting, translating, or any sort of modifying and reuploading of my work.
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v-hope · 19 days ago
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»part forty one — give up
»belong
»artist!kim taehyung x heiress!reader
one year to prove you can fend for yourself. one year to keep your parents from making the most important life decision for you. one year to still carry the perfect life for the media whilst carrying a simpler one for yourself... and way less than one year for you to realise you belong in the latter, with that cynical new roommate of yours.
a/n: i feel like there’s gonna be some slaughter here either directed to y/n, tae or me lmao, so i will just go back to study and leave you guys to it 😌 i hope you enjoy!
563 notes · View notes
minyfic · 11 days ago
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spice - KTH | M
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↣ you and your best friend, Jeon Jungkook, take it upon yourselves to help the community when you find out that an ancient building that acts as a shelter for the homeless is to be demolished. All efforts are fruitless, but there’s one more thing you could do; approach the mayor’s son, Kim Taehyung, who’s scarier than the mayor himself.
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pairing: playboy!taehyung x reader
genre: crack, fluff, smut, angst, s2l
word count: 14.7K
warnings/tags: bi!tae, long-haired tae, strong language, soft girl aesthetic, virgin!reader, best friend!JK, Y/N is afraid of dicks & sex, rich!tae, mentions of homeless people, mentions of masturbation, mentions of infidelity, explicit smut- first time sex, fingering, grinding, hair pulling, lots of talking + dirty talk, pet name, oral (f), hickeys, clit biting, multiple orgasms, protected sex, slight scent kink, praise kink
a/n: gentleman tae is it
‘You have reached your destination.’
You whip your head around to stare at Jungkook who sheepishly stuffs his phone into his jeans pocket.
“Seriously?”
He unclicks his seatbelt, speaking with a pout, “what if you got lost?”
“Are you being serious right now? Who could miss that?!”
You point to the blinking, neon red sign, that sits above a very large doorway, shaped in the word ‘SPICE.’
“I mean, I’ve never been to this side of town so…”
You roll your eyes, switching off the engine and gesturing for him to follow you into the dimly lit building.
“Wait,” Jungkook yanks you away from the large mahogany doors, “we can’t just enter.”
You watch two women take the steps that lead to the entrance, sauntering through the doors.
“I think we can.”
“Okay but. Have you ever met him?”
You groan, “no. I haven’t. But what does this have to do with anything? We’re just going to have a decent conversation with him, get him on our side and ask for his help.”
Jungkook laughs, sarcastically, rubbing his forehead in exasperation.
“Listen,” he holds up both his hands, tracking his words as he speaks, “you can’t just talk to him.”
“Why? Is it because he’s the mayor’s son and he acts like some hot shot?”
“No,” Jungkook sighs, seemingly losing his patience, “it’s not because of that. Remember the fundraiser we held last year? The one you missed because you were sick?”
“Stomach flu,” you nod, “yes? What’s your point?”
“Well, I met him there. And he wasn’t very…welcoming. He refused to take the pamphlet I was handing out and my handshake!”
“Jungkook, no one takes the pamphlets you hand out and maybe he was having a bad day. He doesn’t usually attend fundraisers…he probably didn’t want to be there.”
“No, Y/N,” Jungkook’s voice has a slight tremble to it, “you didn’t see him before. In real life! You didn’t see the look he gave me.”
“Well,” you grab Jungkook by his shoulders and steer him in the direction of the building, red light beaming down on his terrified features, “put on your big boy pants, because you’re gonna meet him again.”
It smells a lot like tobacco and beer in the large space, dark wooden tables and chairs line each wall with a bar to the far left and a lounging area. You heard that Spice was some sort of club owned by the mayor’s son, it doesn’t look the one you envisioned. Not in the slightest. There’s no loud, obnoxious music, but the lazy hum of jazz which filters through the speakers.
Jungkook tugs your coat, you follow his gaze to a pool table behind the bar area, men with leather jackets and shiny hair, slick with gel, crowd the area, none of whom you recognize. You’ve never seen him in real life, but from the images on the internet and the newspaper articles, he’s handsome. Of course he is, his father is known to be the most attractive mayor in your town’s history. And you obviously know that his son uses his charms to his advantage when it comes to wooing men and women. You haven’t heard unpleasant gossip about him, but you know that he has a different face with him every few months.
“I can’t see him.”
“There-“
Jungkook points to a man with long, brown hair who spins around holding a pool stick, another stick popping out of his mouth.
“It’s him. Come on,” you drag Jungkook in the direction of the pool table, the air thickens the further you walk into the dull space, a few red lights line the couches in the corner.
“Wai-“
“Excuse me?”
Your tone is as determined as your stride, keeping your arms to your side to appear more friendly.
Kim Taehyung cocks an eyebrow in your direction, gaze flitting from you to the possibly horrified-looking man behind you.
“I’m Y/N. Can you spare me a few minutes of your time-“
“I’m not interested-“ deep, baritone voice cuts through your practised speech.
You resist the urge to gasp and keep your professional smile on, poking his back, clad in expensive leather. He doesn’t turn around fully this time, just looks at you over his shoulder, moving the pink lollipop to the other corner of his mouth.
“I just need a few moments to discuss something with you. I promise it won’t take much of your time.”
The group behind him pause their conversation to listen, two men, dressed in leather as well, and two women, you recognize them as the same women who entered the club earlier. Their attentive gazes have you feeling a little uneasy, but your smile doesn’t waver.
“Can we speak so-“
“I’m listening,” he spins around to face you now, sitting on the pool table and resting his hands on his thigh.
If there’s one thing you hate, it’s when people cut you off while you’re speaking. But you take in a deep breath through the nose and call your backup.
“Kim Taehyung,” Jungkook rushes forward and thrusts his hand in Taehyung’s direction, “good to see you again.”
You grab Jungkook’s wrist when Taehyung just stares at his awaiting palm, seeing the group go back to their conversation from the corner of your eye.
“So, what do you two want from me?” He gestures between the two of you with his lollipop, licking his lips before he speaks again.
“I’m single right now, but I prefer to focus on one relationship at a time. Although you two look decent.”
You and Jungkook stare wide-eyed at each when you catch on to his words.
“No no no,” you splutter, Jungkook joins in your laughter, just as nervous, “we have something else to discuss with you.”
He narrows his eyes at you, tan skin being exposed when he cracks his neck.
“Go on.”
“Well-“
“But,” he glances at his watch, “I don’t have much time, so make it quick.”
Jungkook decides to take over when he sees your eye twitch from being interrupted once again.
“I’m not sure if you keep up with the news or anything-“ his chuckle makes you question ever bringing him along “-but we need your help with building 613.”
His eyebrows furrow, obviously he wouldn’t recall a building by its number.
“The face brick one on the fourth street.”
He folds his arms, “what about it?”
“Well, your father had a statement published a week ago that it’s set to be demolished before the end of the month.”
He doesn’t say anything, just watches your mouth as you talk so you take it as your cue to continue, but Jungkook beats you to it.
“There are people living there, it’s a shelter for the people who can’t afford the simplicities of life, the one’s who go to bed hungry each night, the ones who-“
You slap Jungkook’s chest, “what he’s trying to say…if the building is demolished, where would they go? As far as we know that building doesn’t belong to anyone.”
“Alright,” he stands up to his full height and adjusts the collar on his jacket, “can I ask why you are telling me all this?”
“Because you’re…the mayor’s son.”
He laughs, eyes crinkling with mirth, “and you come to me? The person who’s hardly involved in his father’s business.”
“Trust me, we’ve tried everything. This was the only thing we could come up with now.”
Jungkook takes a step forward, “we tried contacting the mayor himself but there was a waiting list, we held a rally, we-“
Your eyes bug out when Taehyung shoves his lollipop in Jungkook’s mouth, who blinks stupidly at the intrusion.
“Listen,” Taehyung grabs the pool stick again, “there’s nothing I can do to help. I’m sorry, it sounds terrible, but you’ve come to the wrong person.”
“Wait, you can’t-“
“Yes,” he spins around, and sits down on the couch behind him, back facing you.
“But but-“ you’re just as frantic as Jungkook now “-kids live there, and old women and men who can’t take care of themselves, they all need each other! And the puppies-“
His head swivels in your direction, eyebrows reaching his hairline, “puppies?”
“Yes,” you fight the lump in your throat, “the puppies, they live on the rooftop, and I have no idea where they’d go.”
“And their mothers,” Jungkook adds, removing the lollipop from his mouth.
You both perk up when Taehyung returns with a softer look on his face.
“I’ll…Can we discuss this in a more-“ he glances around “-suitable setting, like my café? Tomorrow?”
You and Jungkook nod, heads almost popping out with your vigour, “sure. What time?”
He pulls out two cards from his leather jacket, business cards, and hands them to you.
“Text me the details. I’m free from 4PM till 8PM.”
Wow.
You have no choice but to smile politely and agree. You literally get off work at around 6:30PM and by then you’re exhausted. Jungkook leaves after 7. You would have less than an hour to discuss things.
Jungkook lets out a relieved sigh once he enters your car but you’re quick to remind him that this is only the beginning.
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It’s 7:34PM and you’re furiously chomping on a donut. He gave you four hours to work with and he agreed to meeting at 7PM, yet he’s still late.
“Calm down, Y/N. We still have half an hour.”
“Calm down-“ you glare at Jungkook, the corners of his mouth are white with icing sugar, “calm down?! You know how I feel about tardy-“
Taehyung enters the café wearing the same leather jacket and stoic expression from last night.
He pulls out the chair across from you and Jungkook, holding up two fingers to the barista who scrambles to make his drink.
“So,” his eyes flicker from you to Jungkook, “I spoke to my father last night.”
“Really?”
Jungkook laughs in disbelief, “that quick?”
“We…live together.”
“Seriously? I thought someone like you would live on your own.”
You watch Taehyung poke his tongue in his cheek, eyes set on Jungkook now, “someone like me?”
You pinch Jungkook’s thigh under the table, he bites down on his lower lip while you shoot Taehyung a tight-lipped smile.
“And what did he say?”
“Well,” he leans back in his chair, fluffing out the ends of his brown locks, “I told him what you told me about the elderly, the kids and the puppies.”
“And?”
Your place your forearms on the table, listening intently.
“He- thank you sweetheart,” he beams at the waitress who sets his pink milkshake on the table, probably the first time you’ve ever seen him smile. As soon as she returns to the front counter with a squeal, his smile is gone.
“He said that we need-“ he takes a healthy sip of his milkshake, your knee bobs in impatience “-he said that we need to gather the homeless and have them speak.”
You glance at Jungkook, “speak about what?”
“Why the building is so important to them.”
You scoff, mirroring his posture, “that’s really dumb considering the fact that they’re HOMELESS.”
Deep, brown eyes lock onto yours, “well, that’s what Mr. Mayor wants. Now if you’ll excuse me,” he sips noisily, “it’s almost 8 and I have somewhere to be. And don’t worry about the bill.”
He turns on his heel and rushes toward the exit, you run after him and grip his arm, he smirks as he stares at the way your fingers are curled around his bicep.
You retract your hand and adjust the hem of your dress, “what are we supposed to do?”
His hand comes up, index finger rubbing his bottom lip. You’re suddenly feeling exposed under his gaze, shifting from foot to foot.
“Just gather everyone there on Saturday and make sure to grab as much attention as you can on social media. News reporters might be there, and I’ll get a permit to close the road.”
You watch the corners of his mouth lift ever so slightly before he exits the café, a gust of wind lifting the skirt of your dress as he leaves.
“So,” Jungkook questions, wiping his chin with a beige tissue, “what did he say?”
You return to your donut, “he said we should get everyone together and-”
“Oh. It didn’t work the last time.”
“Yeah,” you sigh, gazing into the distance, “but he said that news reporters might be there and he’s gonna get a permit to close the road.”
Jungkook grins, “that might work. I knew this would work! I mean, why wouldn’t it? It’s a direct link to the mayor.”
You place your elbows on the table, “something’s fishy about Kim Taehyung.”
“What do you mean?”
“I don’t know,” you answer, resting your chin on your interlinked fingers, you wonder why a guy like him is so willing to help you out. What’s in it for him? What’s his motive? What if he plans on saving the building, then buys it from whoever and chases everyone out? You need to know why Kim Taehyung, playboy, hedonist, someone who doesn’t get involved in matters like this, is so determined on helping the poor.
When you voice your concerns to Jungkook, he complains that you’re being confusing because his help was what you wanted initially. You can’t help but wonder…
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“Where’s your husband?”
You sigh, adjusting the blush pink coat on the woman’s shoulders, “I don’t have a husband, Mrs. Kang.”
She’s perplexed, eyes darting from the car behind you to your purse then to your face.
“And you live alone.”
“Yes. Mrs. Kang. Now do you remember everything I told you to say?”
She nods, grabbing your hand and pouring out her thanks which you can’t really focus on because you recognize Taehyung’s BMW, with a long procession of cars following.
It wasn’t that hard to get everyone gathered, most of them are unemployed while the others are mostly car guards or take up gardening jobs here and there. But you’re still stressing out. True to his word, Taehyung had someone close the end of the street and the news channel’s van is parked across the building.
Jungkook arrived an hour before you and he doesn’t seem the slightest bit anxious. The mayor’s verdict will determine whether these helpless people get to live their lives in a comfortable home. Although you hope to propose proper housing facilities like running water and electricity. The lack of a shelter is what brought them here, to an untenanted, nondescript building near the end of town.
Taehyung steps out of his car along with two other men and his father who emerges from the black car behind his. The mayor isn’t known for his ostentatious behavior, his son however…
“Good morning,” he greets with a curt nod to Jungkook. The corner of his mouth twitches when his eyes land on you, raking down the length of your dress.
“This is Y/L/N Y/N and…friend, whose name I am yet to remember.”
You resist the urge to laugh at Jungkook’s wide eyed expression and bow when you spot Mr. Kim who appears from behind Taehyung’s lithe frame. You’ve seen him before but haven’t been formally introduced.
“Miss Y/N, I’m sure my son has informed you of my presence here today. Let’s not waste any more time.”
His frown lines drag down into his cheeks as he smiles, gesturing to the man behind him who rushes past you with a microphone and a cameraman following clumsily.
“Are they going to be interviewed?”
He nods, stuffing his hands in his pocket, mirroring his son who keeps an intense stare on the side of your face.
“Yes. I’m not sure why I am needed but my son insisted that I stay,” he turns to Taheyung, “he can handle everything himself.”
You cock an eyebrow, “I thought he doesn’t really involve himself in matters like these.”
Rich, masculine laughter reaches your ears, the corners of their mouth spreading into a box shape.
“He doesn’t. Unless I ask him too.”
You take a step forward, standing next to the sprightly man and observing each of the tenants as they’re being interviewed. You had advised them to not allow anything to hamper with their confidence in keeping the building for themselves.
“What did you plan on doing with the space after the building was demolished?”
He shoots you a grin, “am I the one being interviewed?”
You’re afraid that he may not like the idea of being questioned but his laugh eases your nerves.
“I haven’t planned anything as yet. But I will let you know.”
You take this as an opening to give your ideas some hope.
“Can I…make a suggestion?”
He considers your words for a moment before he’s nodding, Taehyung seems to be listening attentively with the way his head tilts a bit in your direction.
“Well,” you take a deep breath, “I was thinking that instead of demolishing the building. Obviously, everything costs money, why not have some renovations done?”
“Dear,” he purses his lips, “there’s a lot that has to be discussed. I may be the mayor, but I will have to seek counsel from the rest of the head community members.”
“I’m sure that you, along with the other community members, are well aware that this town does not have a shelter for the homeless. What kind of community would we be if we are ignorant to those living on the streets, who knock on our doors asking for a slice of bread? That’s how I was made aware of this building, I never visited this part of town before until I asked a woman, who came to my doorstep carrying a baby with another clinging to her arm.”
Taehyung raises an eyebrow, while the mayor chuckles.
“Well. Let’s see how things go today and I’ll have Taehyung give you a call when it comes to convincing the other head community members.”
You blink, knowing that you have much more to say. Instead, you turn your attention back to Mr. Ahn who rambles on about how no one would employ him because of his ‘nasty’ eye patch.
By the time lunch rolls around, you and Jungkook hand out hotdogs to everyone including the two men who hover near the mayor.
“Hello,” you jump in fright when you feel Taehyung’s hot breath in your ear.
“Yes. Oh,” you had him the neatly wrapped meal, “want one?”
He smiles, “no thanks.”
You shrug and continue to pack the extras back in the crate, Jungkook is busy munching on his fourth one.
“Y/N,” Taehyung holds his fist to his mouth as he clears his throat, clunky watch reflecting the sunlight into your eyes, “where are the puppies?”
You dust your hands, gesturing for him to follow you behind the building, laughing when he grimaces at the wall that’s covered in algae. You guide him up the unstable stairs and onto the roof. Immediately, the seven dogs who were lazing around a minute ago, scurry in your direction. You expect Taehyung to duck in order to protect his expensive suit, but instead he kneels and grabs the brown dog’s face, cooing and scratching. The grin that splits his face is something you never thought you’d ever see on Kim Taehyung.
“You’re so handsome! Yes, you are! Oh hello!”
None of the dogs jump and play with you like they always do, instead they crowd around Taehyung for some of his affections. The sight makes a smile creep onto your face.
“So,” you begin, scratching behind one of the puppy’s ears, wondering when the stench would get to Taehyung, “do you think we have a chance of saving this place?”
You’re not looking at him, but you can hear the smile in his voice as he rubs the other pups’ bellies, “oh definitely. Look at them. Although-“ he turns to you, “-you didn’t suggest an animal shelter for these guys.”
You laugh, “I didn’t get a chance to. But that’s on my long list-“
“Of demands.”
You roll your eyes, “I’m doing this for the community-“ standing up to your full height to peer over the ledge.
“But why are you doing this?”
His lips sag into his usual uninterested expression when he levels you with a stare.
“Are you forgetting that you asked for my help?”
You nod, moving a bit to the side when he joins you at the ledge, “yes, but you could’ve said no.”
He shrugs, “I just wanted to do something good for once.”
Deciding to drop it for now, you spin around and make your way to the top of the stairs, he pats your shoulder as you’re making your way down.
“Yeah?”
“I’m actually going for this…show tomorrow night. Want to join me?”
He bumps into your back as you halt your step, whipping your head around to stare up at him, “why?”
He scans your face, the proximity bombards you with the heavy scent of his cologne, “because…It’d be fun.”
You aren’t going to overthink things, but it sure does seem like he’s asking you out on a date. Why would someone like him be interested in someone like you? But you could be wrong.
“I’m actually working late tomorrow,” you aren’t lying, “maybe some other time.”
His tongue swipes across his bottom lip, nudging you to keep walking, “that’s alright.”
You’re met with the sight of Jungkook with his arms around the mayor’s shoulders.
“What’s going on?”
Taehyung smiles at his father, in a way that seems like they’re sharing an inside joke.
“I made my decision,” Mr. Kim informs, a beaming Jungkook giving you a hint.
“And?”
“I’ve decided to demolish this building, but another vacant building which is still under construction would be built with the intent of a shelter for the homeless.”
You smile, bowing in thanks, while you try not to jump up and down with Jungkook.
“Thank you, Mr. Kim.”
“However,” he adds, holding up a slender finger, “we’d have to raise enough funds to add any extra utilities for these people to live a comfortable and healthy life.”
You’ve done plenty of fundraisers in the past and you have no doubts that the next one would be a cinch.
“Of course. Thank you again, Mr. Kim.”
He waves his hands dismissively, placing an amiable hand on Jungkook’s shoulder, “I should be thanking you for bringing this to my attention.”
Jungkook opens his mouth to speak but you shoot him a glare in warning, knowing what he was about to say.
The mayor says his goodbyes and leaves along with the rest of his posse while Taehyung lingers behind you.
“So.”
Your eyebrows furrow, making your way to your car with the large crate in hand, “so?”
“Sure you’re busy tomorrow night?”
“What?”
“What?”
It’s annoying that he’s calm while you’re the opposite, lips stretched into a smirk.
“Of course! I told you that I’m working late tomorrow. God!”
His smile doesn’t falter as he opens the car door for you, seeing him wave you off in the review mirror.
“He’s so weird.”
“I think he’s nice.”
You groan, “just yesterday you called him a privileged idiot.”
“That’s because he is,” Jungkook chortles, grabbing another hotdog from the backseat, “but he’s still a good person.”
At Jungkook’s words, you think of his interaction with the dogs earlier. Despite the nauseating smell, he still played with them and let them cuddle him. It makes you question your view of him for a bit. It was influenced by the gossip you heard from others, however, you’re still a bit skeptical about his willingness to help.
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You wave Jungkook over to your desk, pointing at the figures on the screen when he stands behind your chair.
“This is good for the first week.”
He clicks his tongue, eyes scanning the numbers, “I’m not sure. Usually, we have a couple thousands more after the first week.”
You sigh, knowing that he’s right. The site you set up for fundraising isn’t doing as well as you thought. But it doesn’t cause too much worry because you still have the fundraising event this Saturday.
“What you two up to?”
Without lifting your head from the screen, you groan in annoyance at the presence of your ex-boyfriend.
“Go away Namjoon.”
He rests his chin on his arms, leaning on your cubicle with a grin on his face, “can’t. This is my working space.”
Jungkook continues with your discussion, ignoring Namjoon who steps around your desk to stand next to your chair, hands in his pocket as he dips his head to stare at your screen.
“What’s this for? The crusty building on fourth street?”
You glare at him, not prepared to argue with him this early in the morning.
“If you aren’t making a donation, please go away.”
He laughs, “you two are always busy ‘helping out the community,’” he points to your screen, “wouldn’t be surprised if you take all the cash for yourselves.”
“Listen buddy,” Jungkook speaks with the same amount of irritation that you’re feeling, “we work hard and if you’re bitter because you don’t do anything to help the community then just let us be.”
He holds up his palms, retreating to his desk, “I’m just saying. No one invests this much time and effort in stuff like this.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, whispering into your ear, “can’t believe you dated that guy.”
“Hey!” You smack his arm, “he was a nice guy, okay?”
“Yeah, yeah. Anyway,” he walks backward, cupping his palms around his mouth as he shouts, “don’t stress too much!”
You laugh when Jimin tells him to shut up.
He’s right, you should focus on Saturday being a success rather than the figures on the fundraising site. Most people prefer to get something out of their money anyway, so the market always contributes a huge chunk to the total funds raised.
As always, you and Jungkook are going to be selling food and you can’t wait to check out the other stalls.
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Market days have always been your favorite. Knowing that people enjoy your food, and the money is being put aside for a good cause is heart-warming. The loud chatter and laughter fill the fresh air, kids lining up to try Jungkook’s fruit lollies while you prepare sandwiches and subs for the peckish customers.
You’re busy stuffing the notes into the tin when you notice someone stand at your table from the corner of your eye.
“Hello. What can I get for- Kim Taehyung.”
You have no idea why you have this reaction to seeing him after a week, but you gather your emotions and pull out your small notepad, ready to take his order.
He smiles, brown eyes travelling to the menu propped up on the side of the table, index finger rubbing his bottom lip as he browses through the options.
“What do you suggest?”
After five minutes, he still hasn’t made up his mind and the queue continues to grow behind him.
“Uhm,” you lean over to peek at the menu, pointing to the large spicy chicken sub.
He shakes his head, brown locks dusting his leather jacket, “I don’t like spicy food.”
Laughing to yourself, you move your pen up on the laminated paper and draw his attention to the mild chicken sub.
“I’ll take three. Thank you.”
You shuffle to the table on your left and he follows you, waiting patiently on the other side.
“What was so funny?”
You glance up at him, spooning the shredded chicken into the bread, “what?”
“Just now,” his nods to the other table, “you laughed.”
And he reminds you of why you laughed, so you laugh again.
“Oh. Nothing. Just-“ your eyebrows pinch together, shrugging as you speak, “you said you don’t like spicy food but you literally own a club called ‘Spice.’”
He chuckles, the sound tinkling in your ears.
“It’s not a club, it’s a lounge and I didn’t name it spice because of its literal meaning.”
You wrap up his subs and hand it to him, then pull off your gloves to stuff the cash into the tin.
“What do you mean?”
He rolls his tongue across his lower lip, leaning over the table to whisper.
“Variety is the spice of life.”
Just then, a cool breeze wafts across your back, involuntarily shivering when he tips his chin to stare into your eyes.
“I’m going for this…car show tomorrow evening. Would you like to join me?”
Your gaze travels to the impatient man standing behind Taehyung, grumbling to himself.
“I-“
He grabs the subs and moves away from the table, your throat feels dry.
“You have my number. Let me know,” with a wink, he disappears from your sight while you fumble to take the man’s order.
Jungkook sidles over to your side, you ignore his pensive stare.
“Was he flirting with you and did you just fall for it?”
You clear your throat, bending down to reach for the pen that slipped out of your grasp.
“I did not. And he was not.”
“I hope not,” Jungkook tails you as you hand the man his order, “you know what a guy like him would want from you.”
You place your fist on your hip and turn to Jungkook, cocking your brow in irritation. This guy has varying opinions on Taehyung.
He shrugs, the corner of his mouth quirking up, “I’m just saying.”
You’re not oblivious when it comes to guys and their different shapes and sizes. And Taehyung is the type you avoid at all costs. You’re cautious when it comes to breaking down your walls, even more after the joke that was your last relationship. Jungkook should know better than to think that you’ve fallen for Taehyung and his charms. He’s handsome, yes he does have luscious hair, and chocolate eyes, and a perfectly shaped mouth and a great sense in fashion. But, you would be silly to be swept away by his allure. Silly.
The rest of the day runs smoothly and you’re more than proud when you tally up your orders and reach the goal you’ve set for yourself by the end of the day.
It’s time for the stallholders to close up when the mayor and his two bodyguards arrive and collect the funds from each of you.
“Thank you for organizing such a wonderful day. The sub was delicious.”
You smile, untying your apron and folding it neatly.
“Thank you.”
Jungkook rushes over and grabs your hand, pulling you to the group of people huddled at the center of the field.
“They’re taking a photo for the newspaper.”
The mayor stands in the middle of the long row of people, Jungkook stands on one side with you near the end. Your breath hitches a bit when the smell of Taehyung’s perfume fills your nostrils.
“Closer!”
The cameraman diverts your attention to the way Taehyung’s hand hovers over your waist, inching closer so he can get in the frame.
Your eyes lock for a split second before you’re facing the camera and smiling, leaning away from him. You ignore the thunderous beat your heart drums in your chest, the way your blood rushes to your cheeks, stomach twisting in a feeling you’re trying to quash as you scurry to your car. You suspect that it’s a harmless crush, a crush on an attractive man that will disappear once all this is over.
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It was supposed to be your day. After slogging all weekend, you were supposed to be lazing around and munching on the leftover subs from yesterday. But all your plans of having a destressing afternoon had to be cancelled because your boss called in and said that you’re needed at work.
To say you’re in a shitty mood would be an understatement.
And on top of that, despite your best efforts of keeping him out of your mind, your dreams were filled with a fanciable male you hope to never see again for fear of your heart being pulverised by your own expectations.
The cloyingly sweet voice of your coworker causes you to scrunch your eyes shut for a while, struggling to keep his words out of your head.
“Saw you in the newspaper. You looked pretty.”
“Go away Namjoon.”
He chuckles, voice becoming louder as he walks behind your desk.
“I saw you with that guy. The mayor’s son. What’s his name?”
He clicks his thumb in an attempt to remember while you crack your eyes open, hoping he doesn’t say-
“Kim Taehyung.”
You keep your eyes on your screen, typing furiously.
“Are you guys together or something? He had his arm around your waist. If I saw correctly.”
Something about his tone irks you, tilting your head to shoot him an unimpressed look.
“He did not.”
He shrugs, “well you two were standing pretty close. Is something going on?”
You have no idea how your love life concerns him, but you hear yourself say: “no.”
His deep laugh makes your eye twitch as he leans back against your cubicle.
“Of course. How could I think that the mayor’s son would date you. You aren’t his type at all.”
You grit your teeth, acknowledging the tiny pang in your chest.
“That’s okay though. Even if he did want you,” he holds up a finger as he walks away, “you won’t date him because you’ll come back to me like you always do.”
“No I won’t!”
You’re fuming, heart thumping in your chest at his words because it’s half-true. You always go back to Namjoon in the end. Because it’s convenient for you, because you’re too afraid to experience other men, too afraid to reintroduce each aspect of your life to someone who may not be worth it. For fear of your heart being torn into shreds all over again.
But you promised yourself the last time, that you would never go back to him, never make the same mistake.
That’s why, you’re sitting in your company’s parking lot, typing out a message to Kim Taehyung with blurred vision.
His reply comes hours later when you’re snuggled up in your nest of cushions, grieving in silence.
[18:10] Kim Taehyung: Hello Y/N.
[18:11] Kim Taehyung: Of course. I’ll pick you up at 8?
You spring up, leaning back against the couch as you try to fight the smile that burns into your features.
[18:12] You: actually. Can I come with Jungkook?
Obviously, you’ve informed your best friend of your impulsive decision and after you were berated for what felt like hours, he had insisted that he go along with you.
[18:15] Kim Taehyung: Sure why not
[18:15] Kim Taehyung: I’ll bring a friend along too
[18:16] Kim Taehyung: Should I text you the address?
You squeal, typing out a message to Jungkook but even more anxious to meet his friend.
[18:17] You: That’s ok. I’ll get it from the internet
[18:18] Kim Taehyung: Alright. It’s the BMW Torque Show.
You’re already fussing about in your room, flipping through your clothes to find a cute outfit and accessories to match.
[18:21] You: Thank you!
[18:21] Kim Taehyung: See you later (;
Half an hour passes, and you settle on a knee-length white dress with little roses on the collar, and boots. Jungkook said that he’ll fetch you a few minutes before 8PM so you scurry to do your makeup and hair, letting it hang in soft curls.
Your nerves heighten with each passing minute and you’re so jittery that you almost forget your phone charging in the corner of your room when you hear Jungkook pull up outside your apartment.
“Sorry, I had to go back ‘cause I forgot my phone.”
He laughs, pulling onto the road while you click in your seatbelt.
“Relax. So, I know I might be a third wheel-“ you give him a discernible look “-but I’m still a bit hesitant to let you date this guy.”
“Jungkook,” you speak plainly, “this isn’t a date. More like friends…I guess? Hanging out. Plus, you won’t be the third wheel, he said he’s also bringing a friend.”
“Oh?” He spares you a glance before he’s turning onto the highway, “you’re friends now? What do you even know about this guy?”
You open your mouth to answer but he cuts you off.
“Apart from what you heard about him.”
Taking a minute to think, you realize that you haven’t had a proper conversation with him before. Maybe that day on the roof?
“I know that he likes dogs.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes, “everyone likes dogs.”
You shove his shoulder, “not everyone!”
“But I mean, you know he’s not the type of guy you take home to your parents and that’s what you’re looking for. Am I right?”
“Maybe we should just cancel because it seems like you’re trying to put this whole thing off.”
“No! No, I’m not. I’m just-“ you give him an empty smile when he looks at you, waiting for him to continue “-I’m just concerned because I know what happened with Namjoon and every guy before that.”
You huff, choosing to stare out the window and ignore your friend who’s bringing up your painful past when you just want to enjoy yourself tonight. Even though cars aren’t really your thing, as long as it takes you from A to B, you’re happy. But you do appreciate a sleek car when you see one.
“We’re here.”
You straighten your posture and notice the crowd near the racetrack, eyes wide in awe at the shiny vehicles parked near the entrance and the massive racetrack.
“I think we need to buy tickets then head down there.”
You follow Jungkook’s line of sight, nodding when you see the table set up at the gates where people are lining up.
Jungkook pays for your tickets and follows you down the narrow pathway into the space where tables and rows of chairs are set up for people to watch the show.
You’re about to text Taehyung to notify him of your arrival when Jungkook nudges you, standing ramrod straight when you see Taehyung and an unfamiliar woman approach you. Why did you expect his friend to be a guy?
“Y/N,” he grins, “and…Jungkook?”
“Hey,” Jungkook rubs the back of his neck nervously.
“Hi,” the woman steps forward, enveloping you in a tight hug, “I’m Jiah.”
She’s pretty, dressed in a charcoal grey coat. You can tell she’s much older than Taehyung and you’re curious about the nature of their relationship.
“She’s my lawyer,” Taehyung nods in her direction, pouting when she smacks his shoulder.
“I’m not his lawyer.”
You force a chuckle out, catching Jungkook’s gaze furtively, knowing he must be thinking the same thing.
Taehyung stuffs his hands in his jeans pocket, gesturing to the racetrack, “shall we?”
He walks with your pace as you take careful steps down the stairs, you can see him glance at you now and again in your periphery.
“Didn’t think you’d say yes.”
“Huh,” you realize that he’s talking to you, already feeling embarrassed in his presence, “well, I’m here.”
You snort, wondering why you’re behaving like an awkward teenager.
“Uhm, yeah,” you decide to add, hearing Jungkook and Jiah laugh behind you, “I changed my mind.”
Joining the crowd at the starting line, you pull out your phone to snap some photos of the luxurious cars parked in a fancy manner, weaving through the crammed-up space to stand next to Jungkook, Taehyung following close behind.
“What do you think we’d be doing if this was a normal Sunday night?”
Jungkook leans down to whisper, ogling the shiny black vehicle while he takes a video of the man speaking on the makeshift stage.
“Probably crying over another romcom we’ve watched over a hundred times,” you giggle, spinning around to look for Taehyung only to be met with his broad chest.
“Enjoying yourself?”
You shrug, tugging your cardigan closer to your body, “I’m not really a cars person but the night is lovely.”
“The night?”
“Yeah, the night,” you repeat, seeing his eyebrows furrow in question. “I mean,” you glance around at the joyful crowd, bright lights shining down on the track, sky spotted with stars, the scent that only belongs to the velvet of the night, “this atmosphere. I like it.”
“I agree. It’s kind of boring right now. Want to grab something to eat?”
“There’s food here?”
With a chuckle, he points to the food truck near the entrance, and you resist the urge to slap yourself. It’s huge. How could you miss it?
He guides you up the stairs, joining the queue while you stand behind him.
Tugging your arm, he points to the menu pasted on the front of the truck.
“We can order together.”
Your heart stirs in your chest at the contact, choosing the mozzarella corndog for you and Jungkook while Taehyung orders for him and Jiah. As expected, he refuses to take your money when it’s time to pay for the order and you argue about it all the way back to the racetrack.
“Thanks,” Jungkook begins stuffing his face with the corndog, while you struggle to finish it.
Usually, you’d be scarfing down the cheesy goodness, but your nerves are preventing you from enjoying the food. When Jungkook is done with his, you hand him yours quietly, thinking that no one would notice because they’re all listening attentively to the man who’s listing the specifications of each model.
“Not hungry?”
You shake your head, about to tell Taehyung that you ate earlier when a booming voice overlaps yours.
“Hi guys! My name is Kai and I’m selling tickets for a spin in one of these bad boys. If you’re interested, form a line behind the tape or head to the seating area and enjoy the rest of the show!”
Spinning around in the direction of the stairway up to the seats, you peer over your shoulder to see Jungkook and Jiah heading over to join the line.
You feel a hand on your arm, Taehyung’s friendly eyes pointing to the cars behind him.
“Wanna go for a spin?”
You exhale a dry laugh, “and waste money? When you could literally take me for a spin in your BMW for free?”
You clamp your mouth shut when you realize what you said, seeing him smirk suggestively.
“You wanna go for a ride in my BMW?”
You splutter, “I-“
He tucks a strand of hair behind your ear while you’re holding your breath, fisting the skirt of your dress when his finger trails down your cheek.
“I’m just kidding. It’s fun on the racetrack. Plus,” he slides his palm in yours, while you’re stunned into silence, staring at the point of contact, “I have an idea.”
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“What do you mean that’s not the policy? I’m paying for it.”
You chew on your nail anxiously, seeing Taehyung try to convince the stern man to let him drive one of the cars instead of “sitting in the backseat and going 50mph.”
“Come on. I’m sure if your boss was here, he’d understand.”
Offended, Kai hands Taehyung the tickets and tells him to head to the other end of the white tape.
“It’s okay. I’m sure we’d have a good time.”
Taehyung glares at Kai, scoffing, “the last time I came for one of these shows they let me drive myself. I don’t know what’s this guy’s problem.”
Taehyung looks…terrifying when he’s angry. But his smile returns when he ushers you to the dark blue car on the other side of the tape.
When the driver steps out, Taehyung’s face lights up and he takes the man into a bone-crushing hug.
“Hoseok! Where the hell have you been?”
“Here and there. So good to see you, bro! Hi!”
He steps in front of you, thrusting his hand in your direction. You shake his hand shyly, eyes travelling to his shiny suit.
“This is my friend, Hoseok. He’s a professional race car driver.”
You smile, “nice to meet you.”
You don’t miss the way he winks at Taehyung as he makes his way around the car.
“Hey, uhm,” Taehyung points to the steering wheel, “can I drive?”
“Woooh, you know I can’t do that.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes, “I did it before. Come on.”
Hoseok cocks his head to the side, eyebrows furrowing, “I cannot do that. We have strict policies regarding the cars and this racetrack.”
Uncharacteristically, Taehyung grabs Hoseok’s hand and pleads with him, smiling to yourself at his childlike behavior that draws the attention of the people waiting on the other side of the track.
Hoseok rolls his eyes, “fine. But I’m sitting with you.”
He hands Taehyung the keys and walks around the car to open the passenger side door, while you hover near the trunk.
“Nice!”
Taehyung is about to put his seatbelt on when he notices you standing near the car, awkwardly.
“Hey. Can my lady sit in the front with me?”
You choke on your own spit, heart stammering in your chest. His voice was so…soft.
“Yeah yeah,” Hoseok holds the door open for you to step in the car, hands trembling as you click in the seatbelt.
You tuck your hair behind you ears, glancing at Taehyung who sports a cheeky grin, one hand on the steering wheel.
“Hi.”
“Hi.”
“Ready to go for a ride?”
Something about the way he said that makes your cheeks heat, averting your gaze to the row of people who are watching as Taehyung starts up the car and revs the engine.
“Yeah.”
Hoseok pokes his head between your seats, placing a concerned hand on Taehyung’s shoulder, “remember start nice and easy because this track is designed for-“
“Yeah yeah. I got it.”
“And don’t forget that-“
“I got it!”
He steps on the pedal, and you’re glued to the seat, a nervous laugh filling the small space as Taehyung zooms around the track, hair flying wildly around your face, eyes going dry.
Maybe you should’ve closed the window because the air gets knocked out of your lungs when he goes even faster, hysterical whoops coming from him and Hoseok.
You’re gripping onto the seat for dear life, boots lifting with each turn he takes, smashing into the door embarrassingly. When he glances at you, you shout for him to watch the road with a dazed smile, knowing that you can’t save your hair. Appearances are the last thing on your mind when you start to ease into the ride, adrenalin pumping through your veins, laughter bubbling from your chest because you can’t remember the last time you had this much fun.
Your tummy hurts, body feeling like jelly when he finally comes to a stop at the starting line, the crowd cheering as Hoseok steps out of the car.
Taehyung’s long fingers pull your hair away from your face, some strands got stuck on your lip gloss and he makes sure to get those out too, heart still racing in your chest.
“You okay?”
He says finally, face a few inches away from yours, heady scent clouding your thoughts.
You nod giddily, eyes flickering to his lips just as his do the same. It might be your mind, that’s still in a muddled lump, playing tricks on you but he leans closer and so do you, puckering your lips, closing your eyes when he tilts his head.
You wait and wait, eyes flying open when he clears his throat, he’s staring out the windscreen, back in a straight line.
Panicking, you jump out of the car and walk around the track, running up the stairs to see Jiah tucked into Jungkook’s side.
“Jungkook,” you say breathlessly, sparing Jiah a smile, “can we go?”
He takes in your frazzled state, and you don’t realize how crazy you must look with your unkempt hair, chest still heaving.
He holds up his hand, glancing at his watch, “err yeah. It is getting late.”
Turning to face Jiah, he wraps her up in a hug and you make your way to his car with hurried steps, mind spinning as much as your heart.
Jungkook unlocks his car, and you jump in hastily, scrubbing your palms down your face.
“Is everything ok?”
“No,” you sigh, “I was having fun and- and we were having fun but then I thought. I thought that-“
You groan, unable to even finish your sentence because you’re so ashamed. For a fleeting moment, you were carefree, you had no inhibitions and you thought that Kim Taehyung, the guy who wouldn’t even spare a girl like you a second look on any normal day, wanted to kiss you.
“Alright,” Jungkook starts his car engine, driving out of the parking lot, “I think I know what you need.”
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Shoving the last bite of your pastry down your throat, you slouch in the sofa, neck bent on the armrest. Jungkook is sprawled across your rug, eyes half-open.
“I can’t believe I thought he was gonna kiss me.”
“Hey,” Jungkook yells, holding up his arm and pointing to ceiling, you know he must be drunk by now, “it’s okay! Just because you thought that he was gonna kiss you doesn’t mean he was gonna kiss you. Wait. Wait- that’s not what I meant to say!”
He laughs drowsily, slurring his words even more after he takes a deep breath and continues with his speech.
“Just because you thought he wanted to kiss you, doesn’t mean it’s your fault. You thought he liked you the whole night?! I thought he liked you the whole night! Jiah thought he liked you the whole night!”
You take a swig from your drink, resting your arm across your tummy, “yeah.”
“And isn’t it funny,” he titters, poking your knee, “isn’t it funny that I kissed Jiah and you didn’t kiss Taehyung.”
Your eyes widen in shock, tilting your head to stare at your goofy best friend who collapses on your wooden floor.
“You kissed Jiah? On the first meeting?!”
He shakes his head, bobbing as he speaks, “now…I know what it looks like. But she’s the one, man! I just know it! Who knew- Who knew-“
“Who knew…what? That you like older woman.”
Clapping like an inebriated seal, he punctuates each word with a burp, “yes! Precisely! Who knew I like older woman and who cares if we kissed on the first date!”
You scrunch up your nose, jealousy slowly pouring into the mix of embarrassment, anxiety, foolishness, disgust, disbelief, and sorrow. Your own feelings caught you off guard, you didn’t realize how deep your crush was after tonight, after the rejection stung more than you anticipated. And he isn’t to blame. You are. For thinking that a playboy like him would be interested in dating you. You should’ve believed your own words. When you said that it was more like ‘friends’ hanging out and not a date.
As the night progressed, you couldn’t help but sense a connection between the two of you, the electricity each time you locked gazes or exchanged smiles. Or when he held your hand, long, dexterous fingers curling around yours, hair flowing behind him, delirious when he was behind the wheel.
You yell into the throw cushion, as if that would get the memories to disintegrate and you would live a life where this night is erased from your memory.
“You won’t see him again, you know,” Jungkook reasons, sitting near the couch now, head in your lap, “only at the opening of the shelter which is in three weeks’ time. You know they already started extending the building.”
“I know,” you sigh, relief and sadness filling your thoughts, knowing that seeing him is tantamount to not seeing him at all.
“So, you don’t have to worry. By then, everything will be forgotten.”
You hum, his words echoing in your head a lot louder than you need. Everything will be forgotten. Him. You. The short exchange that will be ingrained in your heart for the rest of your life probably. The fact that there was so much you didn’t know about him disturbs you even further, because you feel so much.
It was definitely the small touches, his gentle mannerisms and caring demeanor. Even the short while where you saw his playful side pop out. Guys like Kim Taehyung only come around once, and it’s a shame that your experience is over.
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Two weeks pass and you’re driving home from work when you decide to visit your friends on fourth street. Mrs. Kang raves about how she’s going to be the manager of the shelter.
“Mr. Kang would be so happy if he were here.”
You place your palm over hers, reminded of her husband who passed a few years ago, involved in a hit and run accident. Even after all these years, not a day goes by where she doesn’t mention her husband. You hope to find a love like that someday. To love whether they go on or not.
As you walk up the stairs to pay the puppies a visit, your mind drifts to a man with a charming boxy smile. Each day goes by, and you regret ever talking to him, spending time with him, as little as it was, because it hurts even more, and you can’t help but think that this is your fate. To be alone.
When you open the gate, you come to an abrupt stop when you see a man in a black suit crouched down, smoothing his palm over the puppies’ backs.
Your heart skips a beat when one of the dogs bark in your direction and he spins around, smile falling when he sees you.
You twist the fabric of your beige cardigan with your fingers, deciding to stare at the puppy that’s plopped in front of you instead of looking at him as he makes his way toward you.
He stuffs his hands in his pockets, voice timid, “hey.”
“Hey,” you dip down, scratching the puppy’s belly, cooing when he nudges your knee.
“How have you been?”
“Good. And yourself?”
You’re trying your best to keep your feelings out of your voice, but the tense air around you proves that something is going on. Or nothing is going on.
“Good. You uhm. I didn’t see you after that night,” he laughs, it sounds a little hollow to your ears.
You stand up to your full height, deciding to walk to the ledge and peer over, watching the women pack the fruits and vegetables that didn’t sell today.
“Yeah. Sorry I took off like that.”
He stands next to you, much closer than you would expect him to.
“It’s alright. I understand.”
He understands? Understands what?
You didn’t realize that your thoughts were being spoken until he replies.
“I understand that I’m this guy who asks you out and everything is going well but then…”
He trails off. You’re baffled, even more than you were yesterday or two weeks ago.
“I mean. It’s annoying when someone gives you mixed signals.”
Tilting your head back when the warm afternoon breeze billows out your skirt, you shake your head, “I take mixed signals as a no.”
You see him nod from the corner of your eye and then he’s tugging your arm lightly, urging you to look at him, eyes brimming with an unknown emotion. Unknown to you.
His tongue darts out, “I didn’t mean for things to go the way they did.”
He hesitates for a while before he’s smiling, cocking an eyebrow in interest, “can I be honest with you?”
You fold your arms, pretending like his cologne and intimidating stance isn’t affecting you.
“Yeah?”
“I’m not the guy for you. And I realized that when it was too late. When I knew that I shouldn’t treat you like another game.”
“A game?”
He laughs, cheeks tinting a bright pink.
“I mean. Obviously, you’ve heard the rumors about me.”
You roll your eyes, laughing as you speak, “you were under that assumption before you asked me out the first time?”
He shrugs, “yeah, I mean. I…don’t really know. Honestly. I just wanted to have some fun. Like what I always do.”
Then tension in your shoulders deflate a bit, “it’s okay. I understand.”
“Okay.”
Silence falls over the two of you and you take the time to think about what he said. So, Jungkook was right, maybe he was in it for one thing, but you don’t know if you should be flattered that he backed out in the end.
“Do you wanna…check out the new building?”
You nod, “sure. I heard that they’re working fast with extending the building.”
“Yeah,” he holds the rusty gate open for you as you walk down the stairs.
You unlock your car and wave at the ladies as you go. He doesn’t speak during the ride except for when he gives you directions. You’re glad that you decided to wash your car last week after a sudden burst of energy to clean your kitchen, your house, your car, your life.
“Turn here.”
At first glance, the building is huge, even bigger with the extension at the back and the paint is fresh and crisp.
“Wow. This is great,” you squeal, “I’m so happy right now.”
“Thanks to you.”
“No,” you tuck your hair behind your ear demurely.
A man wearing blue overalls runs up to Taehyung, shaking his hand and pointing to the building behind him. You’re standing a foot away, so you can hear their conversation pretty clearly.
“We’re almost done with the first coat. I’ll let you know if we need anything else.”
“Thanks.”
“And congratulations,” he nudges Taehyung’s shoulder, “I hope you know that your selfless act will return to you tenfold.”
Selfless act? You’re curious, seeing Taehyung smile and wave the man off.
It’s only when another man with a mohawk appears with a thick stack of papers do you feel a little curious. Especially when they start talking about a deposit, with Taehyung signing a few documents that look important.
“Do you want to go for a walk?”
You nod, sliding your hands in your pockets, seeing him walk in the direction of the park a few minutes away.
He gestures for you to follow him, turning around the corner to the beautiful view at the end of the street. The lake is calm, golden as the sun beams onto its surface. You sit down on the bench next to him.
You decide to break the silence.
“I didn’t expect you to…be this involved with everything.”
He smiles, resting his hands on his lap, “actually, the building on fourth street belonged to my grandfather.”
He faces you, eyes lit by the golden sun, making your breath hitch.
“Really?”
“Yeah. And after he passed, I inherited it. I didn’t really care much though.”
“Wait wait,” you fold your legs on the bench, holding up your palms, “the building belonged to you? And you knew about the people living there?”
Nodding, he chews on his cheek, scanning your face while you’re stunned. He knew about the homeless who were living in his building for months, almost a year and he did nothing about it. Men of his calibre wouldn’t waste any opportunity to monetize their possessions.
“Well, anyway. Enough about me,” he pokes the tip of your nose, “what about you? What’s your story?”
You fiddle with the hem of your skirt, keeping your gaze on the movement, “my story?”
“Yeah. I know that you’re the head of the HR department at Kim Inc. You’re single, live on the quietest street in town and stay in for fun.”
You gasp, “that’s all there is to me.”
“Is it?”
“Yeah,” you sigh, “life has been pretty boring these days.”
“Yeah?”
He scoots closer to you, arm stretching across the backrest. The sun is disappearing from the sky, streetlights flickering on as you chat.
“Are you single?”
You giggle, covering your mouth with your palm as you laugh. His question catches you by surprise.
“I wouldn’t go on a date with you if I had one.”
“Hey. Anything can happen in two weeks.”
The fact that he remembers how long it’s been since you last saw each other makes your heart soar.
“I don’t,” your eyes travel across the lake, knowing that he’s still watching you.
“I think someone as beautiful as you must have tons of guys lining up for a chance.”
Will he ever turn off his charms?
You roll your eyes, despite the blush that spreads on your cheeks, mumbling, “bad experience.”
“Ohhh. I’m guessing…” He taps his chin, “you got cheated on?”
Your mouth hangs open, “how did you know?”
“I guessed. Wait, seriously? I’m so sorry.”
You shrug, “it’s okay. It was a long time ago anyway.”
“What happened?”
Taking a deep breath, you think that the effects of his charms are making you a little more talkative tonight.
“We were dating for almost a year, and everything was great. I loved him. He loved me…That’s what I thought. I caught him with a coworker of mine. A mutual coworker.”
He smacks his thigh, “what the fuck.”
“Yeah,” you give him a sad smile, “and for months I kept thinking that I pushed him away-“
“You shouldn’t think like that. Some men are cheaters. That’s just the way they are.”
You think about the downfall of your relationship, what led up to the point where he decided to throw everything you had away just because of a stupid fight.
“And I kept thinking that I shouldn’t blame him because men have needs and I couldn’t satisfy his needs because I was stubborn.”
Taehyung clears his throat, “what needs?”
You scoff, “you know!” Eyes on the patch of grass near your shoe, speaking under your breath, “I didn’t want to sleep with him.”
Immediately, you want to swallow your words when you see the indecipherable look on his face.
“Why…Why didn’t you want to sleep with him? If you don’t mind me asking.”
It’s your turn to change the topic but he grabs your hands, pestering you to tell him until you lose your patience and blurt it out.
“I’m a virgin!”
“Wha- Really?”
“Happy?”
You leap up from the bench, but he yanks your arm, pulling you back down with a huff.
“Don’t be embarrassed. You just…surprise me every time I see you.”
“What?”
He scratches the back of his head, “nothing.”
The awkwardness thickens in the air until he decides to speak.
“It’s okay if you’re still a virgin. I’m not sure why you’re embarrassed. If you’re waiting for that special person then-“
“That’s the thing,” you whisper, still refusing to look at him, “I wanted to. So many times.”
“Then what stopped you?”
You’re already so deep in the conversation, you might as well just tell him.
Glancing around, as if you aren’t the only people sitting in the park this late in the evening, you lean in closer to him to whisper, taking advantage of the position to breathe in his cologne.
“I’m kind of…scared.”
“Scared?” He’s whispering too, face a breath away.
“Yeah…That it might…hurt.”
He scratches his chin, speaking in a low tone, “I’ve never been with a virgin before but from what I’ve heard it hurts...”
You groan, slumping against the bench.
“I’ve also heard that it feels really good,” he winks, sending a shiver down the length of your spine.
How did you even end up here, having this conversation with the guy you wouldn’t mind enduring the pain for?
“Maybe you’re just afraid of male…genitals.”
“I don’t know, maybe,” you rush to talk about something else, but he continues with his theories.
“Or maybe, you’re afraid because of what you heard from others. Not everyone’s experience is the same.”
You rub your arms, suddenly feeling the chill of the evening.
He seems to notice because the next moment, you’re being shrouded by his coat, fleshy forearms exposed to your gaze.
“Thanks.”
You’re drowning in his cologne, almost moaning from the delicious scent. It almost feels like he’s on top of-
Where are these thoughts coming from? It’s unlike you to have such salacious images pop into your mind.
“But I mean…if you’re scared, you aren’t afraid to like…you know…explore by yourself?”
You screw up your face, but nod anyway, ignoring the way his Adam’s apple bobs as he speaks.
“But I’ve never…”
How do you even tell him you’ve never fingered yourself because you’re too afraid? And even if you try, it’s like your lady parts cower. You Googled it and you think it’s called vaginismus? You don’t even know for sure. You can’t trust Google.
You don’t even have to finish your sentence because his brown eyes light up in understanding, lip tucked between his teeth.
“You know,” he flicks off a string of cotton from the coat, “it’s not that bad.”
“Easy for you to say. You’re a man!”
He laughs, low and husky, ensuing another hurricane of filthy thoughts in your mind.
“Do something for me.”
Your eyes widen, “here?!”
“It’s not like that!”
He grabs your wrist and closes his fingers around yours, keeping your index finger out.
“Put it in and touch the roof of your mouth.”
Your stomach flips with an unnamed feeling at his orders, even more when his eyes watch the movement of your finger disappearing into your mouth.
You narrow your eyes, “it tickles.”
“Do you feel those bumps?”
You nod, like tiny folds gathered, hot and wet with your spit.
“That’s what it feels like.”
“It doesn’t feel good,” you wipe your hand on your skirt.
“The bumps are similar to the ones inside your…female parts.”
“How do you-“
You purse your lips, hyper aware of his minty breath wisping your hair around.
“How will that help me get rid of my fear?”
He inhales a shaky breath, eyes searching yours, “it won’t. But I-“
Your eyes fall shut when he grabs your cheeks and captures your lips with his, tongue sliding over yours when you gasp. You fist the front of his shirt, quickly matching his pace with soft suckles to his bottom lip. He swallows your moan when his tongue prods into your mouth, curling against the roof of your wet cavern. Your mind is running a mile a minute. He bobs his head, slick muscle staying rigid as he massages the bumps he made you feel earlier, heat collecting between your thighs.
Your hands skim across his chest, laying flat on his pecs as he continues to thrust his tongue. You whimper, grabbing his wrists when your lungs burn, too lost in the pleasure of his tongue rolling into your mouth.
He rests his forehead against yours, chest heaving, “I’m sorry.”
Your palms rest on shoulders, shaking your head, still thinking about the feeling of his tongue in your mouth.
He intertwines your fingers, you follow him giddily as you walk to your car.
When you’re settled in and about to drive away, fighting the simper on your face, he knocks on your window with his knuckle.
“See you on Saturday.”
His lips are more pink than usual, looking even more attractive under the moonlight.
“Saturday.”
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The week drags by, with more work piling and your anticipation building. After that night, you couldn’t get the kiss out of your mind, swirling in your thoughts during the day, preventing you from focusing on your tasks.
You got home that night and called Jungkook, relaying the unexpected turn of events when you saw Taehyung. After you had repeated the entire conversation to him, he still had the same things to say. That he’s still wary, that you should be cautious and to remember who he is. It did annoy you, but you know that Jungkook has a point. Taehyung has a way with words, that’s how he made a reputation for himself in this small town.
But that doesn’t stop you from replaying the kiss in your head a million times, his blown-out pupils and soft lips. His tongue…
And, to your relief, vaginismus wasn’t a thing for you. Because that same night, hand slithering under your sheets, you dared to try something, and it felt…amazing. You’ve never experienced such an intense orgasm in your life and only one name dripped from your lips when you were lost in the pleasure.
You’re touching up your makeup when you realize that it’s almost 4PM. You’re too jittery to even give yourself a once over before you’re walking out the door and heading to the shelter.
Dozens of cars are parked on the sides of the road. You recognize Jungkook’s then Taehyung’s, hair at the back of your neck standing on edge when you see Taehyung near the shiny entrance doors.
You’re forced to park a few miles away from the building, trying not to trip over in your heels as you make your way toward Jungkook.
“Hey!”
He waves at you, one arm wrapped around Jiah’s waist. It’s odd to see Jungkook out in public like this and you’re happy for him. He also had his fair share of shitty relationships.
You’re peering over the crowd to look for a certain male when you feel a tap on your shoulder.
“Hey.”
His eyes disappear into slits as he smiles and you’re unable to speak, blubbering because he’s just a foot away.
“You look pretty.”
You open your mouth to thank him, but the mayor’s voice grabs his attention. He steps forward to stand next to his father, clapping as he congratulates and thanks everyone for their presence and effort.
“But, most of all,” he places his hand on Taehyung’s shoulder, smiling proudly, “I want to thank my son.”
Everyone cheers and hollers, Taehyung’s shy smile making your heart race.
Jungkook leans down to whisper in your ear, “maybe I was wrong about him.”
You turn around to give him a confused look, “what?”
“He sponsored this building. It was supposed to be rented out.”
“How do you know this?”
“Jiah told me,” he shouts in your ear over the ruckus of the crowd, “she said that this building was his and he had plans to rent it out. But he didn’t.”
Your eyes are set on Taehyung, who’s guiding the people into the building for a tour. First, he let the homeless stay in the building on fourth street, then he sponsored another. Your heart is in your throat at his generosity.
When you walk past him to step into the brightly lit building that smells of lavender, he curls his fingers around your hand, pulling you to the side, stumbling along the sidewalk.
“Hey,” he smiles like earlier.
And you’re sporting your own grin this time, having found your voice.
“Hey.”
He thrusts his thumb in the direction of the building, “I can give you a tour another day, but I wanted to talk to you.”
You nod, nerves skyrocketing, blood rushing to your ears, “okay.”
He guides to his car and opens the passenger door for you as you get in, wiping your sweaty palms on your dress as you see him jog to the driver’s side, still smiling as he drives.
“So…What do you want to talk about?”
He licks his lips, brown hair covering his eyes slightly, “I’ll tell you in a bit. Let me find a good spot to park.”
The good spot he finds is the same park where you had your first real conversation, your first kiss. You’re hoping it wasn’t your last.
He combs his fingers through his hair and unclicks his seatbelt, facing you with a serious expression that makes your smile slip.
“I…”
You dip your head, so he meets your eyes, seeing the blank look on his face.
“I am sorry.”
You laugh, “for what?”
“I…kind of…did research.”
A frown replaces your smile, mostly of out perplexity, “research?”
“Yeah. But, only after the night at the car show. I swear.”
“What are you talking about, Taehyung?”
He groans, covering his face as he speaks, “I kind of asked around about you…at your workplace.”
“What?”
“Only because I was interested in you! And I never ever do that! Mostly it’s the other way around, but I know that literally everyone in this nosy town knows about me and my past and my habits.”
You grab his hand, not catching anything else he’s saying because you’re too focused on the first sentence.
“You were interested in me?”
He said he did research on you by asking around at your office? You have no idea what there was to say about you because none of them know you at all. The only thing they could’ve told him was that you throw a tantrum each time the coffee machine is out of order.
“I am…interested in you.”
You gulp, forgetting about your blooming feelings for him, how his pretty eyelashes make your throat constrict, how his lips haunt your every waking thought, how his smile flashes in your mind whenever you’re dozing off to sleep and how you think that if you spend even a second longer with him, you might fall, hoping he might catch you.
“I’m interested in you too,” you admit, appreciating the golden hour that sets a rosy tone to the feeling you haven’t experience in a long time.
He leans over and unclicks your seatbelt, warmth radiating off him while your heart sparks in your chest.
“Yeah?”
You nod, licking your lips reflexively, “yes.”
His eyes flit your lips, mouth appearing still even as he whispers with his low, husky voice.
“Can I kiss you?”
Trying to beat down the urge to jump his bones, you nod and await his kiss as he closes the distance, fingers dancing up your jaw until finally, your lips meet in a searing kiss, wrapping your arms around his shoulders as he places on hand on your waist, pulling you over the center console to sit on his lap.
He suckles on the skin of your jaw, earning a whimper from you when he grips your hair, licking the shell of your ear.
Involuntarily, you rock your hips forward, gasping when you feel his erection press into your core.
He pulls away from you to stare into your eyes, neck exposed to your ravenous gaze.
“Let’s go somewhere else, where you’d be comfortable.”
You swallow, fingers sliding across his collarbones to the sides of his neck.
“Okay.”
He sets you down in your seat and starts up the engine and you realize that this is happening. You’re going to have sex. This was probably how your friends felt in high school.
You don’t know how long he must’ve been calling your name, only when you feel his hand on your thigh do you return to reality.
You blink, seeing him smirk, a few buttons on his shirt undone. Was that your doing?
“Where would you be most comfortable?”
“My…bed.”
He nods, turning onto the road and driving as fast as the speed limit would let him, “your place it is. But…I need to get something quickly.”
Parking in front of the local drugstore, he hurries inside and appears five minutes later with a purple packet in hand.
“Alright. Let’s go.”
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When you arrive at your apartment, you feel like the energy that was surging through you in the car has fizzled out, but when he shrugs off his blazer and stuffs his hands in his pockets like he usually does, you feel it again. The tug between your legs.
You pull off your cardigan and follow him into the lounge, wringing your hands nervously.
“Do you want something to drink?”
He catches your gaze, shaking his head and returning to admiring the ornaments you have kept on your bookshelf.
You’re nervous, you don’t know if you should sit on the couch and wait or strip in your bedroom.
Seeing the purple packet on your coffee table, you reach for it to inspect its contents. A bottle of lube and condoms. Eyes bugging out when you read the size.
You fling the packet onto the table when you feel the couch shift, forcing a nervous smile onto your face.
He takes your hand in his, “we don’t-“
“I want to,” you blurt, seeing something fond swirl in his brown orbs.
He tucks one arm under your thighs and wraps the other around your back, your hands fly to his neck as he carries you to your room.
“Okay.”
He stops at the entrance of your hallway, and you direct him to your room, clutching onto his neck as he sets you down on the bed.
The purple packet is set on your nightstand as he unbuttons his shirt while you move to unzip your red dress.
He pushes your hands away, smoothing your hair to one side as he drags the zipper down, breaths mingling as he tugs it down your shoulders.
He lets his shirt fall to the floor while you admire his sinewy chest, salivating as he unbuckles his belt and pulls it through the loops, the leather joins his shirt on the floor with a loud clank.
“I’m gonna take off your dress now.”
Nodding frantically, you lift your hips as he pulls your dress over your legs, crossing your arms over your chest after a sudden feeling of diffidence.
Your eyes dart to his massive erection straining in his slacks, you lean forward and return the favor, rolling it down his legs.
He pushes your shoulder so you’re lying on your back, eyes stuck to the swell of your boobs.
“You’re beautiful.”
Your breath catches in your throat when he noses through your hair, hands sliding down over each contour of your body, squirming under him. His fingers work on unclasping your bra, tossing it over his shoulder.
He steals the breath from your lungs with a passionate kiss, fingers intertwining with yours as his tongue flicks into your mouth, grunting when you nudge his erection with your knee.
“Not yet, dove,” he begins to kiss down your neck, pulling the skin between his teeth, suckling and leaving dots of purple and pink wherever his mouth rests. Wet patches glistening in the early evening light when he feathers kisses on your stomach.
Nothing you say or do will calm your heart, you’re so lost in his touch, and intoxicating scent that belongs to him only, and you can’t imagine what it would feel like to have him inside you, to be connected to him.
He kneels between your legs, statuesque frame towering over you as he holds up your leg by your ankles, kissing the soft skin there all while holding eye contact. You keep your hands at your sides, pussy clenching when his lips drag down the skin behind your knee, to your inner thigh.
“Have you ever been eaten out before?”
You nod.
You resist the urge to clamp your legs shut when he stares unabashedly at the wet patch on your panties, shivering when he keeps his ring clad fingers wrapped around the supple flesh of your thighs, kneading the meat.
“You smell delicious, dove. Can’t wait to taste you.”
Pussy throbbing at his words, your soul feels like it might leave your body when his warm lips curl around your clit over the fabric of your panties, sucking the bead into his mouth.
His fingers curl over the hem of your underwear, pulling it up until it clings to your sodden folds, whimpers tumbling from your lips.
“Please.”
“Please what, dove?”
You crack your eyes open, it feels like a dream to have him between your legs, lips grazing the sensitive skin.
“Want your mouth,” you pant, lifting your hips when he pulls the thin material over the swell of your ass. A long string of your arousal threads from your folds and snaps against your thigh, knowing that you’re dripping at this point.
He makes a ‘V’ shape with his fingers, spreading your folds, licking his lips as he ogles your glistening pussy.
At this point, the remains of your embarrassment go out the window when his breath fans across your swollen folds, you reach down to twist your fingers in his hair, pushing him to your aching pussy.
The low chuckle he lets out sends a shockwave up the length of your body, fizzing when he finally presses his tongue into your folds, spreading them apart with wiggles of his tongue, ensuing a string of moans from your swollen lips.
“Taehyung,” you breathe, grinding onto his tongue as he flexes it against your clit.
He hums, lips curling around your clit as his tongue switches from rigid to relaxed, dragging along your folds, flicking it against your engorged bud. You mewl, both hands in his hair now as your chase your high, feeling the rush of heat approach with each lick into your drenched pussy.
“I’m-“
You tense when you feel a finger circle your slit, eyes peeling open.
He pulls away, taking a deep breath, mouth and chin covered in your slick. He looks like sin.
“Don’t do that. Relax for me, dove.”
Closing your eyes once again, you inhale a shaky breath as he continues to suckle on your clit. His index finger trails through your folds, you tremble when his finger prods into your slit, legs sliding further apart once he pulls out and pushes in again, quiet moans filling the air with each thrust.
“That’s it, dove,” his soothing voice is what keeps you relaxed, fingers resting on your breast as he continues to massage your walls.
When he hooks his finger, you twitch, almost like there’s a button inside you that has your whole body erupting in a wave of goosebumps.
“Ah. Right there?”
“Mhmm,” you chew on your bottom lip, back arching when he adds another finger into your clenching hole, pants of his name breaking from your chest with each tug, each brush against your sweet spot.
His lips return to your clit, and you cry out, hips jerking off the mattress as he quickens the movement of his fingers, curling them into you until you’re shaking, chest heaving.
Your eyes scrunch shut when his teeth nip your clit, walls quivering around his fingers that still piston into your pussy at breakneck speed, scissoring your walls, spasming with his ministrations as you coat his tongue and fingers.
The heat subsides as your eyes slide open, vision a bit bleary as you take in the sight of him sucking on his fingers, pussy throbbing even more when he moans.
“Can’t wait to bury my cock in this tight pussy.”
He misinterprets your whine, helping you up on the bed so your head rests on the pillow, features morphing into worry.
“I promise I won’t hurt you, okay dove? We’ll take it nice and slow.”
You place your hands on his shoulders, pulling him down for a soft kiss that has you melting into the sheets. He struggles to open his eyes once you lean back to stare at his face, boxy grin making your heart flutter.
“Thank you,” you peck his cheek.
He smiles and crawls down the bed to fetch the purple packet.
You watch him patiently as he takes the plastic wrap around the lube between his teeth, pulling at it until he can get the cap open.
Eyes set on yours, he slowly pulls off his Calvin Klein boxer briefs, you bite back a whimper when his thick, veiny cock springs out, bobbing against his abdomen.
“I promise it won’t hurt.”
You watch with awe as he rolls down the condom and then squirts the clear liquid over the length, eyebrows furrowed as he spreads it all over. He hisses when he does it again, you feel bad for him, his pleasure was neglected for worry over yours. You hope that the next time is better for him. If there is a next time.
He leans over you, one arm holding him up while the other grabs the base of his cock and lines him up with your entrance. Your anxiety builds again, and you feel him tip your chin up.
“Take a deep breath and close your eyes for me, dove.”
Quick to obey, you wrap your arms around his shoulders as his chest presses against yours, feeling the blunt tip breach your slit. It pinches, and you gasp. His hand slides along the length of your arm, face buried in your neck, fingers slotting together.
You feel stuffed, and just when you think he’s going to pull out, he goes deeper. Levels inside you which you never knew existed.
“Is it…in yet?”
He suckles on your earlobe, murmuring in your ear, “almost.”
With a shuddering cry, you feel him hit what you think is the final level, moans heightening in pitch as he drags out, then pushes back in, whispering in your ear.
“You’re doing so good for me, dove.”
“Fuck, so tight.”
“I hope you’re doing, okay.”
It feels like an intrusion, but at the same time, it feels like a gap that needed to filled by his cock, so snug in your warm walls, stretching you open, bordering on pain and pleasure.
He grunts and you assure that it’s okay, that you’re fine, that it feels good to have him on top of you like this, sweaty bodies stuck together, intertwined as he flexes his hips against yours, scent fogging your mind, nipples brushing his chest.
Your teeth pierce into his shoulder when his cock brushes your sweet spot, mewling as he sets a pace.
“Yeah? Like that?”
He continues to roll his hips with deliberate strokes, rubbing along your velvety walls. You feel his cock twitch inside you, nails raking down his back, marking his neck with your teeth as you wrap your legs around his waist, feeling him reach even deeper.
“Fuck,” his thrusts become shallow, reaching down to rub your clit with his thumb in tight circles.
You moan, body prickling with goosebumps as your second high hits you, convulsing with the force of your orgasm. He stills his hips, whispering your name huskily as he spills into the condom, fingers digging into your hips.
He kisses up the valley of your breasts, and you’re only made aware of your tears when he wipes them away, pussy aching as he slips out of you and discards of the condom.
Rolling over on your side, the reality of the situation hits you as you pull the blanket over your clammy body, the air around you slightly stuffy.
It isn’t long before you feel him settle behind you, placing a kiss to your shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
You turn around in his hold, cheek pressed against his chest.
“Yeah.”
Suddenly feeling sticky, you throw the blanket over your shoulder and step out of bed only to fall back on the mattress due to your wobbly legs.
“Woah,” he laughs, arms wrapping around your waist and pulling you back under the blanket.
He smooths a strand of hair over your head, murmuring, “where are you going?”
“To shower.”
“Okay. But wait for a while.”
As you stare into those chocolatey eyes, you wonder what happens now. With the two of you. You’re still interested in him.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing,” you lie, choosing not to kill the mood, pressing your back against his chest. The dull ache between your legs hurts the more you move.
His finger curls under your chin, pulling you to face him, mouth so close to yours.
“Are you having doubts about us?”
“Us?”
He nods, taking your intertwined fingers and bringing it up to his lips, lips moving over the skin.
“Yes. Us. If you want us? I mean, me?”
You giggle, eyes darting to every inch of his face, placing your lips on the little mole on his nose.
“I like you.”
“I like you too.”
Grinning at each other for a few minutes, you can’t help but feel gross cuddling like this.
“Can I shower now?”
He pretends to think for a while before he’s placing a kiss on your temple.
“Only if I can shower with you.”
Mouth going dry at the prospect, you twist in his hold, wrapping your arms around his back.
“Okay.”
His boxy smile returns, eyebrow jumping with mischief.
You’ve never enjoyed a shower more in your life, plus a peaceful sleep, and a calming breakfast. And you wouldn’t mind spending the rest of your life with a tender-hearted man that makes it so delightful.
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a/n: please don’t feel shy to send in feedback, hearing your thoughts serve as motivation :)
talk to my characters
⤺Masterlist
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taglist: @ggukkieland @moonchild1 @mwitsmejk @fancycollectormoon @nglmrk @bex-92br @taeslarityy @helenazbmrskai
720 notes · View notes
ressjeon · 19 days ago
Text
washed on | kth (m.)
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pairing: fratboy!tae x sororitygirl!reader
summary: Taehyung’s heated stares were what drew you in at first and you think he seemed shy since you’re shameless though he’s confusing you the more you see him. Is he just planning all of this or are you also too fixed to see past what he’s been showing you? So who’s really playing here, you or him?
rating: 18+
genre: smut, PWP ig lmao, carwash!au, frat!au, strangers/enemies to lovers?
word count: 5.5k
warnings: dirty talk, use of lube (yes, normalize this), hand kink, size kink, protected/unprotected sex, rough sex, outdoor car sex (at the back of her pick up truck), dom/sub/switch undertones, soap/breast play, brief tit slapping and oral (m.), pussy slapping, riding, finger sucking, handjob, fingering, spanking, orgasm denial/delay (we back), multiple orgasms, overstimulation, brief voyeurism, Tae really loves tits and he fucks reader with his jacket on her ;).
a/n: surprise mfers, this is my first Tae fic here and a PWP of him (acts surprised). this simple sexy banner is made by my marsy @joheunsaram​ who started this Hot Summer Boy collab with six other amazing authors!. i procrastinated as usual so i removed some scenes but idk it's just pure filth so enjoy 😜
UNEDITED (i’m editing rn)
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― masterlist — navigation ― wips
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It’s the way he keeps staring at you thinking that you don’t notice him.
The way he averts his eyes away from you shyly when you smirk at him.
Kim Taehyung, Beta Tau Sigma’s good boy.
Or you think he is?
.
When you first heard the news of their frat’s charity fundraiser, you don’t waste anymore time and immediately pass by their frat house to see the simple car wash set up in their parking lot, with many customers already. Of course, they’re all hot so it’s obvious that people would swarm them at once.
You park your car from a distance across the street so none of them will recognize you of course. Who will think that you’re driving a silver pick up truck when it’s way bigger than you? You just want to, for a change and don’t boys want girls that are different these days? That’s what they always say to you.
You want to find out if Taehyung’s really what he is every time you interact with him. The shy and quiet type that is usually your type, well not really but sometimes you love training them, boosting their confidence until they establish themselves on their own. It makes you proud, how it’s because of you. 
It’s early afternoon when you decide to finally visit their car wash to hopefully woo any of them as what your sorority sisters instructed even if you already told them that you have your pick a long time ago.
You open the door of your pickup truck, slowly coming down from it’s steps and you can already feel their eyes on you. Who wouldn’t look? Aside from your car, you’re wearing this denim shorts that’s almost showing half your ass paired with this loose fishnet top, your bright coloured sports bra on the view.
Taehyung’s heart was already racing the moment he saw your car earlier. He knows it’s you because he always notices how you just pass by sometimes, smirking at him through your window and though his friends keep teasing him how you’re so into him, he won’t falter.
For now.
He pretends to not see you when you’re walking towards him while saying hi to his fratmates, busying himself with pulling the hose and arranging the buckets around.
“Hi Tae~” you smile sweetly at him and his friends whistle at that.
You’ve been calling him that name now, why go on full names when you’ve accustomed to each other and if he didn’t really want you calling him with the cute nickname he should’ve told you off a while ago.
Taehyung tries to ignore you but when you come in front of him, tilting your head while leaning down to watch his expression he can’t help his eyes from looking down at your chest.
where your very tempting breasts are.
He unconsciously runs his tongue between his lips, a habit that you notice since the first time you met him. Cute. You smirk when you noticed and give him playful smile.
“You’re not even greeting me? I was hoping you would wash my car” you pout and that brings his eyes back to you.
“I have many customers waiting” he responds softly with his deep voice, gesturing to the many cars that have been waiting for him.
“You really won’t do me?” 
Taehyung blinks at your question because he can clearly hear the double meaning of it even if you said it unintentionally. 
“Yow Taehyung, i can take hers if you want” his frat mate Jimin muses and he tries his best to not give any expression that will give away anything.
You turn to the attractive boy who's offering you his services and would you say no? of course not.
Besides, you're already lowkey upset that Taehyung rejects you again. It’s humiliating since everyone here knows about your fixation on the boy for a while now.
Your sorority sisters keep questioning your pining over Taehyung when you're capable of sleeping with anyone you want.
But you don't want those guys, you want him.
Taehyung sees your face fall for a bit before you walk away from him to Jimin. He shouldn't feel guilty because he does have a lot of clients waiting already but he still does.
.
The next time you visit, you made sure that his other frat brothers aren't there so you can finally bring your plan into action.
Today, you're wearing even shorter shorts from last time and a plain shirt without a bra underneath. You were in a hurry so you just grabbed the first pair of clothing that you can find, not like you care anyways. You're still upset that Taehyung didn't even give you the reaction you were hoping for last time when you dressed up.
Taehyung is annoyed at being in charge of cleaning up the entire car wash set up on their last day while the rest of his fraters are out eating lunch just because he refused to clean your car days ago. He’s momentarily distracted after hearing a car engine stopping by, turning around to see you again with a pretty scowl on your face.
You're already not in the mood after seeing his frustrated expression so you turn around to go back to your car but a gasp comes out from your mouth when you feel the cold water seeping on your shirt. You turn to him and see that he’s a bit drenched too but not as soaked as you.
"I already got your rejection last week, no need to remind me" you deadpan as you roll your eyes but you raise your eyebrow when he doesn't answer you.
He didn’t mean it, it was an accident but he can already see the growing annoyance in your eyes. He’s just taken aback at you coincidentally coming here when he’s obviously alone. Did you plan this? 
Taehyung gulps while looking at your outlined breasts, your wet shirt making your perk nipples very visible. His frustration seems to vanish the moment he sees them and he slips into his own world that he doesn't notice you walking towards him and grabs his unoccupied hand to your chest.
You smirk as you put your hand on top of his and squeeze one of your tits, the firm touch from his hand making you hiss out loud.
It’s embarrassing how quickly he can make you release those sounds, you're better than this and you were gonna pull back when Taehyung's hand squeezes it again but harder this time, causing you to whimper when he flicks his index finger on your perched nipple.
"i'm sorry.." he whispers and that snaps you out of your trance to look at his captivated eyes that never shifted from staring at your tits.
You remember what he did last time so you bat his hand away from your chest and step back, earning a whine from him when you scoff.
"For what exactly? You only apologize when you finally get to touch my tits that you've been eyeing since day one" you bark and you see his eyes widen even further as he looks back at you.
“I didn’t mean to reject your car i swear, i can wash it now if you want” he reasons quietly while still staring at your tits and you scoff, walking even closer to him than before. 
“Sure, but i was still embarrassed in front of everyone so how are you going to say sorry huh?” you taunt and see the guilt swimming in his eyes.
For a second, you feel bad for being too harsh on him, that is until his hand grabs your waist, resulting in you colliding with his toned chest.
You try looking up at him but you see him staring at your cleavage already, you would’ve thought he’s adorable while getting lost in them but arousal pools on your core when you see his tongue out on his lips again.
"..wanna see" he whines,
And who are you to deny him? 
Seems like this is how he’s going to say sorry so you smile flirtily at Taehyung before pulling the hem of your shirt up to finally expose your breasts to him.
Taehyung’s eyes widened at your bold move, he didn’t think that you’ll actually do it out here in the open but then again, he’s heard of you around so he knows how freaky you could be.
He's still staring at you so you opt to grab his hand and pull him towards your pick up truck, climbing up at the back and you grin back at Taehyung when he follows you.
You instructed him to sit down and lean back on the sides while you strip down the rest of your clothing and hang them on the sides, leaving you fully naked under the heat of the sun that makes Taehyung feel like he’s been hypnotized.
god he looks so hot with his denim shorts bunched up so you can clearly see his legs, finally. it’s a rare sight because he usually wears bottoms that cover them so you’re absolutely smitten right now.
Taehyung breaks away from his trance when he sees you straddling his lap. You don’t do anything but stare at him so he’s quite confused. He tests his theory of what you want when he raises his hands to hold the sides of your breast.
You gasp when Taehyung starts circling his thumbs on your nipples, his eyes are still observing every expression that you make. One of your hands that are on his neck moves to his fluffy, dark hair to move his bangs away from covering his defined eyebrows that you love.
Taehyung surprises you when his head suddenly drops down your chest, you can feel his breath against your skin and you would’ve grab his hair until he suddenly pecks one tit before he bites your nipple.
“so y/n, i’m a good actor aren’t i?” his deep voice startles you and you can feel his lips quirk against the curve of your breast as soon as he releases you. You’re still stunned so you don’t answer him but he tweaks your other nipple so you reply at once.
“i-how?”
“you have favourites, gotta make sure i catch your attention too” he winks before hoisting you up.
Taehyung leaves you to get down from the truck and you’re curious of what he’s searching for. You’re still thinking at what he said about favourites, did he specially acted like a good boy so you would notice him?
He comes back with a large bone-shaped sponge that’s clearly used for washing cars.
"Tae–what are you doing?" you look at him in confusion and he sees the disgust on your face while eyeing the sponge he’s holding.
“Chill, this is a new one. You really think I would use some dirty sponge on these beautiful tits?” you clench at his words and he seems to notice it when his eyes travel down to your bare pussy.
“Did you just clench? Fuck, you’re such a dirty girl” he chuckles and reaches out to slap one of your breast and you moan.
“Tae please” you whine, biting your lower lip and start crawling to him but he stops you.
“Don’t move” he orders and you sit back down above your legs, waiting for him like a good girl.
Taehyung places the bottles that he’s been holding on his other hand on the back seat floor, a bottle of liquid soap and lube.
Your insides thrum in excitement at what he's planning to do. You still can't believe how this boy turned from good boy to this demon who's smirking at you right now.
"Taehyung" you whimper impatiently and rub both of your arms.
The sun's harsh rays are making your skin itchy with how hot they are plus you're literally fully naked at the back of your pickup truck. You see him taking off his light jacket and you smile genuinely when he places it around you.
"to protect your skin" he replies nonchalantly but you beam regardless since the gesture is sweet.
Taehyung doesn’t bother taking his shirt off because it’s soaked already, he just pulled down his now heavy denim shorts after retrieving a foil packet from his pocket. 
Your eyes widen after seeing the size of his dick, it’s very swollen with the tip so red when it slaps against his white shirt. He starts stroking it for a bit while looking playfully at you before tearing up the condom packaging.
You immediately rush to him, kneeling in front of his dick as you grab it and start stroking down, surprising Taehyung at your eagerness that he almost drops what he’s holding.
He groans at the sight of you only wearing his jacket while jerking him off. He notices you staring at his hands and he smirks, moving the tips of his fingers to trace on your lips before urging your mouth to open so he can shove them inside.
You swallow his fingers like how you would swallow his dick and Taehyung curses when your other hand fastens its pace on stroking him.
"you love my fingers?" he rasps while thrusting his hips into your tight fist. 
"mhmm" you moan around his fingers and look up to him, watching him getting lost to his own pleasure.
He’s close.
So you start caressing his wrist, your index finger then tracing the little bone on it while tugging on his thin bracelets.
"fuckfuckfuck, you're a sin, you're a fucking sin" he moans as he fucks your hand relentlessly in sync with your hand. If it isn’t for his occupied hand, he would’ve grabbed your head to suck him off.
You let go of his fingers just in time of his release, leaning your body backwards so the spurts of his cum land directly on your breasts.
“Shit!...damn…” he rasps after looking down at you, seeing you being mesmerized at the sight of him, that your mouth is gaping even when your hand is still milking his dick.
“You came a lot Tae” you whisper in wonder and look down at your tits that are coated with his cum.
“Let’s get you clean up” he sighs with content and gets off the truck to pick up the hose from earlier.
Taehyung climbs back up after turning the water on on low volume, picking up the liquid soap from the floor mat before motioning you to move back and lean on the back window of your pickup truck.
You look up at him innocently but yelp after he sprays the hose on your tits, sighing at the cold water hitting your scorched skin.
"Thanks" you smile and sit up so you can stand but Taehyung stops you.
"I'm not done with you yet" he states, his voice turns deeper than it already is and you raise your brow at him.
Taehyung doesn't wait for you to reply and opens the soap bottle before pouring it on your chest. You let out a shiver at the cold, sticky feeling but you moan right after when you feel a slightly rough material brushing your nipples.
You open your eyes to see Taehyung focusing on rubbing the liquid soap around your tits, sticking his tongue out in concentration and you’re getting frustrated because you want more.
“Taehyung~” you whimper when he circles the sponge on your stiffened buds, grabbing his wrist to push the sponge more to your tits.
“What? Not enough still?” he chuckles and grabs the hose, spraying the water on your chest to wash off the bubbles surrounding them before throwing away the hose and latches his mouth on one of your tits.
You instantly grab his soft, fluffy brown hair but you realize the flowing water on the truck floor so you pull his hair up and turn your head sideways to let him know.
Taehyung just groans and turns to turn it off, mumbling about the water fee and something about saving water. He looks cute while pouting so you grab his shirt and press your lips on him, you did it out of impulse and you are hesitating now when he freezes on the spot. 
You start to move away but Taehyung instantly grabs your neck and opens his mouth to kiss you fully. You close your eyes and let him deepen the kiss when he asks for entrance, pulling him closer to you that your naked chest collides with his clothed one, making you yelp at the contact.
At this, Taehyung descends his kisses to your jaw unto your neck, his other hand that's holding the sponge earlier is now squeezing your other breast. You moan when he tweaks it, pulling his hair harder that earned a groan from him.</