#Imma fuckin die when I'm done
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Trust is for the Weak Pt. 2
Lunch club!Jschlatt x Fem reader
Requested by: none
Warnings: Dubcon, swearing, forearm, gets spicy.
A/n: 18+ NSFW! If you don't like the warnings please don't read! PLEASE KEEP MY COMMENT SECTION AGGRESSION FREE!
Tag: @goldenstarofthunderclan ❤️ @youngcreatorlady 💜 @ogelizasoot 🩷
___
Y/n pulled away from Schlatt, running out onto the porch and looking around for any sign of Ted.
"Leave him, he's gonna die anyway." Schlatt said from his place in the livingroom.
"You'd love that wouldn't you? You've always been jealous of him, even when nothing was going on. Always so fuckin jealous, I should've seen it before..."
Schlatt turned to you, anger in his eyes.
"Seen what before? That I was the killer? That I was the one who killed Kristen?"
Y/n began backing up, nearly tripping on the door mat. She turned and ran outside and around the house, nearly screaming when she bumped into a large figure.
Y/n was grabbed by the shoulders and slammed into the side of the house, and a hand covered her mouth.
"Mph!" She attempted to speaking, pulling the hand away. "Ted!"
Y/n wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him into a hug, "Are you okay? He stabbed you, I-I thought you were dead."
"I'm alright, the knife didn't get me where it's too serious."
"We need to call the police, where did Charlie go?"
Ted winced in pain, "He ran to the neighbors."
"Alright, we'll go there."
___
3 yrs later
"Hey, Y/n." Ted said, walking up to the counter of the coffee shop. She's been working there for a few months since her, Ted, and Charlie had moved.
"Hey, Teddy. How are you doing?" She asked.
"I'm alright, I asked out this really cute girl..."
"Lemme guess, she said she'll go out with you?"
"Nope, turns out she was over thirty and married with four kids."
Y/n slapped her hand over her face, shaking her head. "Are you kidding? You couldn't tell?"
"No, she's one of those women who developed late."
"Oh lovely, what was your reaction when she said she was over thirty?"
"I spit my mountain dew all over her...on accident of course."
Y/n giggled, leaning against the counter and waiting for another customer.
"When are you off?" He asked.
"45 minutes, wanna hangout at one of the tables till I'm done here?"
"Yeah...Y/n..."
"Yeah?"
"When you are done, imma need to talk something serious with you...okay?"
"Y-yeah...of course."
When Y/n's shift was over, she ast across from Ted in a booth. The look on his face concerned her.
"What's going on?" She asked.
"I got a call from a pal back home, apparently he caught sight of a guy that looked like Schlatt."
"Are you kidding? J probably fled the country after what happened."
Ted gave her a serious look, "Y/n this could get bad. My pal said the guy had the back of his truck packed like he was gonna go for a long trip."
"So? Why is he spying on some poor dude?"
"Y/n it was a black 2016 Ford F-150. Which is the same truck Schlatt has wanted since it came out."
Y/n felt a shiver roll down her spine, "What are you trying to say?"
"I'm saying this guy might be Schlatt, and if it is he might be coming here."
"How the hell would he know where we are?" She asked. "We didn't tell anyone that we were coming here."
Ted looked down at his hands, he wanted to say something and she could see it.
"Who did you tell?" She asked.
"Dennis Michelin."
"You told Dickhead Dennis!? You tell that man to keep a secret from someone and they're the first person he runs his mouth too!"
"I know! I was drunk! It was a mistake!"
"Yeah Teddy! A mistake that's probably gonna cost us our lives."
___
Y/n was walking back to her apartment, the night was cold and quiet. The street was dimly lit by a few blinking street lights. She walked through the grass next to her building and when her feet it the gravel of the parking lot, she immediately stopped.
There in front was a truck she had never seen before, it was a black Ford F-150. Y/n couldn't tell if it was a 2016 or not without opening the driver side door, but it's not like she was gonna break it some poor sobs truck just to see the year.
She went up to the buildings door, typing in the code and slipping inside. Y/n made her way up the steps and took out her key, hesitating to turn it once it was in the lock.
"This is just stupid." She whispered, "He doesn't know where you are."
With that Y/n took a deep breath and pushed her door open. Her apartment was quite, the lights were off. The moon cascading a blue tint through the livingroom and kitchen.
Y/n set down her purse and slowly made her way down the hall, she opened her bedroom door and stepped inside. Nothing had changed from when she left this morning, she took off her coat and set it on the bed.
Y/n held her breath and stayed silent, waiting for any sign of movement in her home. There was nothing but the ticking of the clock and the beat of her racing heart.
She sighed, going back down the hallway and into the kitchen. Y/n opened the fridge, about to grab the bottle of wine when a figure sitting in the chair in front of the window caught her eye.
Y/n spun around and went to grab a knife from the block when the figure spoke.
"I wouldn't do that, Y/n/n." The sound of a pistol being cocked caught her attention. "Be a good girl, and take your hand away from the knife...slowly."
She could hear it was J, is accent was stronger and his voice was deeper.
"J?" She asked.
"Yeah, princess. It's me."
As she turned back to him, he stood. J was bigger than the last time she saw him. His face was still shaded from the light being behind him, but she could see the gun being pointed at her.
"You gonna kill me?"
"Why would I do that?" His tone was calm, it made the butterflies return to her stomach. A feeling she hasn't felt for three years. "Hmm? Why would I kill you when I can just take you with me?"
"W-what?"
"I love you, Y/n. When I couldn't find you after you ran from me it hurt, and I was scared for you...I knew I messed up...I shouldn't have let you run."
"You say you love me...but you're pointing a gun at me."
Schlatt took a shaky breath, but didn't lower his weapon.
"Come here."
She stayed where she was, "No."
"Are you afraid of me?"
Y/n shook her head.
"Then come here."
She slowly took a step forward, waiting to see when would happen. All she could hear was his shaking breaths and that same clock.
Y/n finally got close enough to where their shoes were almost touching. He lowered the gun and set it on the table behind him.
His hand came up and closed around her throat, it wasn't tight enough to choke her but Schlatt could definitely feel her pulse.
"You are scared." He said, resting his forehead against hers.
"You're bigger."
Schlatt chuckled, placing his hand on her hip and pulling her closer. He leaned down and planted kisses against her neck.
"I've missed your scent." He whispered. "Your touch."
He slid his hands under her shirt, making her gasp. Schlatt was so warm and gentle, it was hard for her to see him as the person who killed their friends.
"Let me feel you, baby." His breath of hot on her neck. "let me take care of you."
"J-....n-no....we can't."
"Shh, I know you want it."
Y/n looked up at him, only this time she could see his face. He had chops and his hair was longer and pulled back with a head band.
She felt heat pool between her legs just at the sight of him.
"Ohh." He whispered, "She likes what she sees."
Without warning Y/n took him by the sides of his face and pulled him into a searing kiss. He picked her up and walked them into her bedroom, laying Y/n down on her soft mattress.
Schlatt began unbuttoning her shirt, planted kisses down her body.
Memories played in her head of Schlatt before that night three years ago. They were so close, she had always wanted to feel his body against hers and his voice as he whispers sweet praises in her ear.
Schlatt gripped her wrists and held her down, attacking her sweet spot and pressing his knee between her legs.
"I'm gonna take you with me, sweetheart. You won't ever have to run again."
Part 3?
THE END ❤️
Hope you enjoyed
Reblogs are welcome 🤗
#fyp#fanfic#foryou#foryoupage#x reader#smut#lunch club schlatt#schlatt smut#schlatt imagine#schlatt x reader#schlatt#jschlatt smut#jschlatt imagine#jschlatt x you#jschlatt x reader#jschlatt
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good evening it is 4am and i have writer's block so imma reread one of my fave recent fics and reminisce about having the ability to write lmfao
so WHOO, eat your young: director's commentary:
the fuckin song gets stuck in my head every time i read the title HJGKFGS originally i was stuck between this one or another title from aNOTHER song but i forgot what that song was so note to self: edit this post when i remember LOL
lines like these are ones that potentially make me dissociate to reread HAHAHA. i don't even know if it quite portrays the atmosphere i'm usually referencing with lines like these (there's something about the lighting that accompanies irl traumatic memories for me that i always end up focusing on and trying to allude to in writing even when i'm not necessarily trying to project... being drenched in darkness with only one point of light to focus on... @_@) but idk its tasty and i love how i opened this fic teehee
this opening scene is very much a love letter (and quick summary of) all the FUCKIN stridercest fics i've read throughout the years, like one of the many things i love about any darkfic niche part of fandom is that there tends to be these few locations that everyone settles on and obsesses over for their ships. for todocest it's the dojo, for goyuu its the basement, for a lot of stridercest fics it's bro's couch/futon. i wanted something that was quickly recognizable for anyone who also has been reading their way through the tag like i have HJSKFG
one of those teeny tiny lil motifs that i had fun sprinkling in ghsdjfkg very fun to play with homestuck's use of color motifs and what it could provide for dave in this new context. it's also a reference to the epilogues, which i'm more obvious about when i bring the motif back later:
in the epilogues, there's a few moments where john waxes poetic about the slightly unsettling environment of earth c
and the thought of that drove me crazy. earth c and the way it's supposed to represent this unfitting paradise that's just a little bit wrong and a little too perfect and the way that perfection grates at you when you start to notice it. i love the metaphor of paradise being uncomfortable because of all the trauma and grief and fighting that preceded it. rly reminds me of how hard it is irl to adjust to happiness and love and comfort after being abused and hurt for so long 😩😩😩
don't even ask me where the bro drinks hibiki hc came from but it's something i carried over from the brorose pornverse because ~consistency~
nothing to say besides being proud of this LOL
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man i have such a love/hate relationship with writing dave dialogue and by that i mean i hate it cuz i never think it's enough LMFAO. i envy anyone who can adopt homestuckian humor and wit easily because i can Not. like i try my best but just know every second i gotta write this idiot talking i'm screaming in agony and bleeding out my ass about it internally JHKFGS
wonder if i'd feel differently if his dialogue was in the pesterchum fonts tho...
CRAZY how much i like that better HAHAHFGKSDFG
one day i'll do a fic where the dialogue is done like the epilogues but until then i suffer and die every time i have to use proper grammar for dave's speech, anyway,
ANYWAY john being a terrible parent is one of the sexiest things that has ever been done with his character i'm so thankful for it godjskfgsdfg and i love thinking about dave's misplaced guilt on the matter. "You want to be on your best friend's side for this, sure, bristling with the instinct to defend him, but you can't commit to it. The sad kid in front of you, put out and missing his father's love, that's who has all your sympathy right now." dave being unable to keep from projecting onto harry from the start, unable to keep from instantly empathizing with the child's point of view in this scenario (partially because he can't unsee himself as anything but an abused child even despite his growing age) and immediately feeling himself distancing emotionally from john at the thought that he could be anything like bro as a guardian.
it's actually a shame i didn't rly get a chance to elaborate on this further because i think there's a lot of fun to be had with thinking about dave's reactions to john's parenting from this point on, like... GOD. when john tried to kidnap tavvy as a kid???????????? feel like that's a fucking GOLD mine of possibly triggering ammo against dave's psyche goddamnit
if harry didn't change the subject here, he would have started bashing john for his drinking habits and canon tendency to traumadump on him while drunk HJSKFG he's made harry incredibly uncomfortable more than a few times doing this and i think it's definitely made an impression on him, but harry decides not to because he doesn't want to do the same thing to dave. he also doesn't want to remind dave that they're doing anything 'bad' here
writing shit like this into a story rly is just for the purpose of practicing interiority in characterization hehe. i feel like it's also a side effect from writing for theatre, trying to mimic as many naturalistic structures of dialogue as possible. fun to fit in tangents that just never really get answered or directly referred to
THE WAY THERE WAS NO ROOM TO TALK ABOUT DAVEJADE FAILED MARRIAGE BUT GOD I WANTED TO TALK ABOUT DAVEJADE FAILED MARRIAGE SO BAAAAAAAD tfw you spend all your free time hanging out with teenagers to avoid having sex with your loving wife
...
this part of the fic is fun because originally this idea came from a discord convo
and it is SO FUCKING FUN to write prose around someone else's dialogue and thoughts 10/10 will recommend
it's especially fun too because all of dave's thoughts and dialogue from around this point on is mostly outlined by my friend, so it was so fun getting to work their insights and characterization into my own interpretation of his character
...
the build-up where dave and harry start snuggling drives me fucking crazy every time like every time i reread this bit i'm always biting on my knuckles and screaming goddamnit goddamnit dirty wrong awful intimacy that suddenly overwhelms you and crushes you and you don't even notice the way you're dissociating from your every action but you aRE
originally this paragraph was also supposed to have a davejade mention but i just couldn't figure out how to make the thought flow well with everything else. originally there was supposed to be something about the way he always shrinks away from jade's touches, how they always make him feel worse and feel colder than he did before she'd tried, but yeah... didnt fit... and ultimately i think the fic is stronger as is. jade being an afterthought that only vaguely gets talked around feels very ic for candy dave anyway HJGFK and rly everything that he feels towards her is more just a side effect of everything he's suffered by bro's hands. no need to focus on his discomfort about jade when his discomfort about harry is more than enough
that being said every time i remember everything i had to omit i WAAAAAAIL
"Syrup clogs your throat. Your throat burns dully, your tongue feeling heavy with that leftover numbing weight of sugar and liquor." lines i cant reread without rly badly craving booze
literally the biggest challenge of this fic was the fact that its secretly a johndave/daveroxy/daverose fic HAHAHGFJG like trying to balance the fact that one of dave's biggest driving forces when it comes to his attraction to harry is that he's just been hosting a million and one ultimately unrequited crushes all his life that he's now projecting forward and trying to showcase that without drawing tOOOOOOOO much attention away from the other main driving force (brodirk and the incest fetish he'd instilled in him)... so sooo hard to balance but i like to think i did a decent job
'let him escape this feeling like he might still be a good person' is such a fucking good line/thought/sentiment that i'm so upset i had no room for cuz it's so good HJGKFSGS who knows maybe one day i'll be able to figure out a way to squeeeeeeze it into an edit cuz god knows i still tweak this and all my fics every now and then
😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love this part... go off past ricky... do find it funny tho that i was ~vibing~ so hard with the prose that i forgot dave's canon ages just a tad HAHA shhhh
these are some of my favorite kisses i've ever written goddamnit
literally the funniest and most inspiring words my writing partner has ever said like LEGEND... it was this phrase specifically that made me drop everything and start writing this fic cuz i KNEW i needed to slap that onto the summary pls JGKLFSG
(Did you ever have a chance? Did he?)
i feel obligated to speak on this line because it's like. one of the huge major themes of the fic HJSKDFGSFG the inevitability of dave continuing a cycle that he's been trying to avoid. really, what can i say, though. this fic follows a timeline that's alluded to but still has yet to be written out (and who knows if i ever actually will write it out, i'm kinda just updating this fic series based on impulses) where dave moves on to project all his trauma with bro onto dirk after they win the game. i love the thought of them trying their best to keep up the brother routine before dave's need to retraumatize himself and dirk's own fucked up inclinations results in them becoming sexually involved. like, honestly, i could go on forever about dirkdave and the ways they make each other better and worse but yeah. the second dave gave into that self destructive urge, he was done. and it's something that bled into his marriage, that bled into his inability to rly engage with karkat, that fed on his ability to be his own person and work on his own recovery. dirk died and the universe went stagnant and with it, dave's ability to grow out of the mold he was forced into by bro
so yeah. he's already at this huge disadvantage. and while this fic focuses on dave's perspective, there's a lot to be said about harry's mindset as well. the way he's egging this on, the way he's encouraging it, the way he's trying to poke into any sort of vulnerability that dave may or may not have. the way he wouldnt quite have the words to pinpoint and identify shit like emotional incest or grooming but he can see that there's something wrong and exciting about what they're doing that he wants to take part in. being set up to failure because of john's neglect, already thinking he's more mature than he is because of it, perhaps knowing just a bit too much about romance and sex because of whatever weirdass confessions about his own relationships john had unwittingly given him. not to mention his feelings for dave and the way he makes him feel like they're equals and the way he gets attention and affection freely from him without really having to fuss and fight for it like he does with vrissy.
so yeah. these two were doomed from the start 😌💙
'That saccharine sear of shame that washes over you then only makes it worse. You can’t fucking believe you’re popping a boner ten seconds into a make-out session.'
so like, i wrote this before getting deep into the show succession and thank god cuz this def would have turned into a ramble about how dave probably was completely unable to get it up during sex with jade. that absolutely was the case because i like to think that dave really is just hardwired into having rly bad sexual hang-ups where his body is just so conditioned to react to a lack of consent and boundaries and an abundance of incest but now thanks to my intimate knowledge of roman roy i also know now that dave occasionally (frequently) has rly bad erectile dysfunction in the face of anything '''healthy'''. thanks a lot succ
this isn't where the wordplay starts but it's where a good amount of it is HJGKFG i feel like 'bro' is a silly word to use in big deep serious prose sometimes HAHAH so my reluctance to use it here is part of why this wordplay started but the other reason is because i have a BIG stylistic thing(tm) about playing with pronouns and names and what omitting them can do for the narrative. blurring bro and dirk by refusing to name them but letting their actions speak for which splinter is being referred to was a very fun experiment (though, perhaps less successful than other iterations of mine where i did this same sort of pronoun play... OH WELL they cant all be perfect)
mentally dave switches from aggressor to aggressor. this possessive need to destroy harry starts to bleed in, inspired by bro and what he'd done to dave and what he'd taught him of sexuality and domination. a part of him resists that, reminding him of the terrifying impact of it all, the horror of initiating and acting on a fucked up desire, and then he switches to dirk, projecting that forward instead. dirk, who he is currently choosing to see more as a victim, who was just trying to help dave as he pushed and pushed at him. it's simultaneously a moment where he can start to blame harry just a little bit about what's happening instead of himself (because harry keeps pushing, he keeps begging to do this, he thinks it's what he wants and dave is just helping him because he doesn't feel he has a choice) and it's a moment where he finally puts himself in dirk's shoes and realizes (fears) that maybe dirk didn't want this as much as he might have acted. that dirk had likely gone through a similar internal conflict that started to kill him inside.
'Jade tries, but something about her touch disgusted you.' IT WAS SUCH A STRUGGLE TO FINALLY MENTION HER LMFAOHSDJFKG such a relief... altho the line after this one rly kicked my ass i could not figure it out for the longest time hjskdfgsg jadey i love you im so sorry
this was an interesting divulgence from the original thought:
which i couldnt rly fit in especially with how balls deep we're into dave's thoughts at the moment but i love it
this line is so stupid HAHAJFGSFG its so funny to me. its a shoutout to me realizing halfway through the initial outline that they're actually half brothers instead of JUST uncle/nephew AND it's a reference to this specific incest joke in the epilogues
(the way harry is there to witness this moment and also say the word incest right after dave... a ship made for mE)
i love this sequence so much i'm so proud of it like FUCK
some of my friends have started to use this line as a copypasta now and it cracks me the FUCK up every time they do HJSKFDGSDF
generally, whenever i write stream of consciousness fics, i'm always building up and waiting for the moment where the stream suddenly goes off track. there's always gonna be a super fun part where i get to just ramble out a bunch of run-on sentences and hopefully even format them in a fun absolutely-inspired-by-poetry way. and i can't stress enough how fucking SATISFYING it is to get there and have it come out (almost) exactly how you thought it would whee
THOUGHTS THAT GOT LOST BUT GOD HARRY CRACKS ME UP... and i love that part of john's personality... and i love the way it unknowingly grates on dave hjsdfg he definitely has a very clear image of victimhood and the way harry doesn't fit into that mold drives him fucking crazy.
one of my favorite parts of dave's unreliable narration, him projecting onto dirk because of his own guilt. it's the only way he can really bring himself to admit that, in that moment, after everything he's done, he's immediately feeling suicidal and bereft with his guilt on the whole situation.
i mention this in a comment as well but i love to think about ult dirk and dirk's internal corruption of his own character. i think it's a fun chicken or the egg scenario, trying to decide if dirk was still himself when he allowed dave to seduce him into this, if dirk's guilt helped guide him into his eventual instability, or if that instability is what lead to him acting on his incestuous urges. did his actions lead to him being labeled a villain, or did he decide to prove his villainy by lashing out?
and it is VERY fun to have this be something dave had done, knowing that in the future, he will be guided into his own metaphorical and literal suicide, abandoning a life he's more than ready to run away from =u= and the cycle continues nyehehe
final thoughts that may or may not be used in a future fic (i'm the black):
what the hell is wrong with harry in d e e d... stares at john
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8 GET KNOW ME BETTER/CATCH UP WITH ME QUESTIONS
Tagged by: @deedoop
Relationship Status: Single and still swinging violently between periods of 'imma independent woman who don't need no man' to 'i don't wanna die alone' to 'i hate all men.' 😅 Not currently able to date because of my class schedule and crippling self esteem issues. But when I have dated, I can never stand most men for more than three weeks. My therapist and I discuss this often.
Favorite Color: I am just shy of obnoxious about how much I love blue. Like, I would be blue (da boo dee...) If I could. Love everything blue. A fair amount of my favorite clothing is blue, mostly pastel or navy. Blue phone, blue laptop, blue coat... You get the picture.
Song stuck in my head: Looooooonely, I'm Mr. Lonely, I have nobody to call my oooooown! 😩🎶 - Mr. Lonely by Akon. Just an earworm I got today. No explanation.
Current song I’m listening to: Just the Girl by The Click Five
Last thing I googled: 'top songs of 2005'. Don't fuckin judge me or my 12yo self.
Three favorite foods: Ice cream 🍨! I will completely put off eating for an entire afternoon if I know there's a pint of Ben and Jerry's in the freezer. Love ice cream it's probably my soulmate. It understands me on a molecular level. Second, is a medium done steak (or steak tips for my New Englanders here) so good. Instant foodgasm. Third is definitely going to be classic plain cheesecake. I like mine with strawberries. I also like New York style best, but Italian cheesecake is pretty good too when it's made with ricotta.
Dream trip: Honestly, just abandon me anywhere in western Europe and I'll be so happy. The rich history, humongous amount of museums, architecture, oodles of food, different landscapes, and beautiful people would let me die happy. I will however say that I would love to go back to France. I still want to spend more time in the west and interior regions.
If I could have anything: Time travel. And yes I would use that to fuck with my or loved ones timelines in ways that would make Loki look so benign compared to me. But also I would love to see historic events first hand.
Tagging anyone interested in this!
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Episode 5: The Tarot
So last we left off we got this dead guy to the church so that his last rites can be done, and he can go and get buried. Before getting there though in the distance we see the priest drag a body into the chapel.
We needed to persuade him to hurry and do the last rites
We don't see the body he dragged in
#sus
Then we hear "FATHER IM HUNGRY" being bellowed from a mysterious basement
He just wants us to take him on a late night McDonald's run. No biggy
We ask the priest what's up with that
Hes shifty as fuck, says nothing is wrong
So Kai, Fauna and Amahlia go and see what's up with that while Lucerian and Lilliya are focused on last rites
We find tracks, locate a room with the body stashed in and a trap door to the basement. Very normal stuff. The priest begs us to not go down there. Informs us that his son was visited by Strahd and now required uh. A special diet
Kai prods a bit and confirms that the priest is in fact killing people for his son
Amahlia is like "imma kill him"
Amahlia No
Lilliya convinces the priest to let us kill his son, putting his son out of his misery
Priest is a broken man. Says "just make it quick and painless"
Kai, Lilliya, and Lucerian go to the basement to kill the lad
We forbid Amahlia from going with us because Amahlia is kind of a murder hobo. So we have Fauna babysit her outside
The vampire boi is scuttling around in the dark. We locate him, and Lilliya offers to let him drink from her wrist so that they can talk
His name is Dorul
Doru is like "but I wanna drain you all the way tho. All of u"
We tried to the very end to make his death quick and painless but Doru has like… 1 brain cell and that brain cell is hungry
He fucking lunges at Kai because he thinks she'll be easier to take out
Surree go for the blind bitch. I see u
Combat is initiated
He did try to bite Kai but failed.
Not sure if you'd even wanna drink cursed blood but idk
Our "quick and painless" attempt to put Doru out of his miserable existence becomes a bunch of loud noises and him screaming
Dorus father listening to as the adventurers loudly struggle to kill him quickly
At the end he is in the bargaining stage of grief
Begs us to not kill him and instead use him
Says he'll eat our enemies
When that doesn't work he says "I'll do anything you wannt"
Lilliya is like "we want you to die"
which is very 'Mr Obama I'll do anything for uuu' 'Then perish' energy
He eventually dies. Heath ledger does superstitious rituals like cutting off Dorus head, burning the remains, shoving garlic in Dorus mouth, normal shit
Btw it was pretty funny at the end of Dorus fight because we had him in a corner and we were just beating the shit out of him
A weird side note: the dm showed a picture of him from the book and like. Every woman with an inkling of maternal instinct was like "aweee" meanwhile I'm thinking he looks like a younger Tommy Wisau (if he ever did look younger)
Anyway after we successfully killed him quick and painlessly we find the father being a fuckin mess
Hes eyeballing a rope hanging from the ceiling
Lilliya does talk-no-jutsu to keep him from killing himself and to instead try to bring hope back to the village. Heath Ledger is like "oh shit that's a fire idea. Sorry sister, I know I said I'd escort you to that safer village but I now have a new purpose. Hey adventurers we just met, can you escort her?"
In the background Kai is getting the rope off the ceiling and stashing it in her bag
The last rites for Heath Ledger's dad are done and we have lowered the body into the grave. It's midnight and we get to see what this "midnight parade" the locals are talking about is
It's a long line of the ghosts of adventurers before us who tried to take on Strahd just walking off a cliff single file
And while this is intimidating the idea is kind of funny to me because the line just keeps fucking going and never stops. Like I get it- holy shit how could we succeed when so many failed- but at the same time this is a very comical amount of dead people
So as Fauna watched a comically long line of dead adventurers go off the cliff edge of Strahd's castle (which is perched on a mountain) she has a breakdown
Fauna in the midst of the meltdown asks “Does a place like this even need heroes?"
Kai says "well I'll die anyway. May as well die faster"
Amahlia: "I can help"
Liliya: “It’s places like this that need heroes the most”
3 kinds of people
We stay the night at the church as the priest is under suicide watch.
Kai is the guardian of the rope.
The priest before bed has pie with Fauna. Causing them to have blissful dreams (the pies have that effect)
The next morning we set out to meet madam Ava, who according to the group of Vistani wanted to see us. We're taken to a clearing next to a lake full of tents.
Btw at this Vistani camp there's a Ton of roguish looking dudes who are total snaccs
RiP Kai is dead
Pour one of for Kai 😔🍾
and Rip to the mammoth tusk she carries with her
We go straight for madam ava
And are like
Because it's the fucking lady that brought us here and gave us the tarot cards
She tells us in very riddle-y vague terms how to stop Strahd and where everyone should start on their personal goals. Each character got a tarot card.
“ 3 treasures to help kill Strahd”
“The avenger- (Luciren) this treasure lies in a dragon's house. Hands was once clean, now its corrupted Knowledge of the ancient will better still help you understand the enemy.”
“Healer (Amalia) Tells of a powerful force of good and for protection, a holy symbol of great hope, Look to the west. Find a pool blessed by the white of the white sun.”
“Charlatan. (Fauna) This is a card of power and strength. Tells of a weapon of vengeance. A sword of sunlight. I see where you can find it. A lonely mill on a precipice”
“Seer (Kai) This card sheds light on one who will help you greatly in the battle against darkness. Look for a dusk elf. He has suffered a great loss and is haunted by dark dreams. Help him and he will help you”
“Marionette (Liliya) Your enemy is a creature of darkness whose powers are more than immortality Look to great heights. Find the beating heart, the castle, he waits nearby.”
With the direct yet vague instruction of what they should do next, the party must figure out their next move
Please remember to keep Kai in your thoughts and prayers as she survives these trying times of being trapped in a camp of hot guys
😔🙏
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Study week is coming and I generally like to type a whole summary at the end of the semester when one ends. Holy Fuck I've been at home most of this semester. Like the amount of times I've actually went to my Uni is either at the single digits or barely past the double digits. So yeah. I wonder if it wasnt for the pandemic how often would I actually be at school. I asked my sister and she just said that I probably would've been there a whole lot. So yeah Fuck. Anyway as an art major looking back I made more shit I like I did this semester compared to last. Which I would probably upload images of but no. I keep my Uni art away from my big tiddy Tumblr Twitter art. Which I haven't done in a while but I'll get back on the horse. Soooo...... A painting I did do that I really liked is this weird nun painting and honestly...
Imma make a big tiddy spooky nun! If the good ol book is telling the truth I'm probably going to hell but considering how I like cute guys and scary chicks I'm probably going to hell either way so that's groovy.
So now I only have two semesters of uni left. It would be one but the art higher ups like to fuck over students so a class that is required that I haven't taken yet is only on during the fall semester. So I'm just gonna be getting as much credits I need this semester and finish up the last class next semester. And then I'll probably get a job for some experience.
Who knows maybe the winds push me a different way and I'll be married to a rich older woman (still like milfs) and live a comfortable life or a cute dude whose is a hard worker. I didn't say dilf cause I don't like dilfs. Hell who knows maybe I'll be a vtuber or get back into IT. (I hated IT)
But let's get a bit existential since like only two mutuals will read this also hey love you and appreciate you homie! Are you ok I hope you are. Anyway the existential dread I wanna hop onto for awhile. Not what happens when I die but more so do you ever wonder what happens to where you live in the next 10 years? Now I'm not talking about family I'm talking about landscape and environmental shit because holly balls to the walls when the city you live in is extremely reliant on a lake that is drying up and you live in a desert. Boy howdy are you fucked! Because the lake I live next to or too is gonna be gone in the next 10 years. Which bring some to this. Where would I go? Who would I be by that time? Will I still be the guy I am? Or maybe something new?
And you know what the answer to all those questions are. Who fuckin knows.
Right now however you know what I'm thinking about?
THIS FUCKING BITCH WHO IVE BEEN TRYING TO SUMMON GOD DAMMNIT FIRST THEY DIDNT GIVE RAIKO, THEY DIDNT GIVE ME VAN GOGH, THEY DIDNT GIVE ME, RAIKOU AGAIN, AND THEY DIDNT GIVE ME A COSMIC HORROR GIRL, AND THEY WONT GIVE ME THIS SNAKE BITCH GOD FUCKING DAMNIT JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH HAVE PITTY ON ME IVE BEEN GETTING SERVANTS I DONT FUCKING WANT LIKE COME THE FUCK ON JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH IM NOT SINKING MONEY INTO FGO SHES THE ONLY SERVANT I WANT FOR A GOOD WHILE COME THE FUCK ON I BLAME MY WEIRD FUCKING LUCK FOR NOT GETTING HER I SWEAR TO GOD AN I GOT COCK TEASED BY SUMMONG A GOLDEN CARD SABER WHO WASNT FUCKING IBUKI DOUJI AKA SNAKE BITCH INSTEAD I GOT SOME SABER FACE I COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT JUST GIVE ME THE SNAKE BITCH
Also it turns out I haven't been eating Philadelphia sandwiches I've just been eating fajita burgers with cheese
#i hate fate grand order#if it wasn't for Scherezade i would've quit#also fuck you i love Scherezade#fgo
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It's time to end it
The final prompt is in progress
It's a biggie
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CLASS 1-A BOYS WITH A CONFIDENT S/O
Hello hello hello! Its ya girl Liya back at it again with some MHA!
This time around we got some headcanons abt the boys from class 1-A with some confident black/poc baddies! For the amount of shit we get on a daily basis, we still be out here proud and unapologetically ourselfs. I've had this in mind since this morning and thank God I'm finally writing it down before it leave my brain.
Warnings: expect some cursing, blushy izuku, fem!Black/poc! x mha, and overall giddiness
If you like what I write don't be shy to request something! I'm in the process of setting up my account to look nice for you guys, but I'll still be writing in the process. Now let's get to these headcanons!
BAKUGO KATSUKI
Fucking adores it
Like when you show your confidence it just makes him so proud
Homeboy can't take his eyes off of you, he just finds it so sexy
He'll also take jabs at you just to see how far your confidence can go, and gets surprised when you go all out in your war of teasing
Training together is always exciting cuz he knows you won't hold back and actively encourages giving it your all.
"I know thats not all you fuckin got,(y/n)"
"Oh you thought I was done, YOU THOUGHT I WAS DONE-"
Proceeds to rock his shit
E admires how even tho you get a low score on something you always have a positive thing to say about it
"Hey dipshit, what'd you get?" "A D." "How the fuck are you not raging, you worked your ass off for that test!" "Eh, always next time. I still, get to eat your ass in training!"
MIDORIYA IZUKU
Blushy boy izu
I headcanon izu being ambivert with an introvert lean, so he may let his S/O take the lead on some things
Your confidence does sort of filter into him though, and he likes that
He loves how you can say whatever you want with no hesitate or waver (although he does get a bit nervous from those death glares Bakugo gives you)
When your confidence shows his mind is like "no thoughts, head empty, just (y/n)"
Like damn girl you live in his mind rent free, right next to All Might
Omg if you drag him to do TikToks he's gonna be like "no babe pls imma die"
But then you'll give him them puppy eyes and pull that "but iiizzzzuuuuuu" and he just busts the fattest uwu
"Fine, but just one, babe"
Fucking taps out half way through
Ngl he was a bit intimidated by your aura
Like you just radiated confidence and power and he just could not for the life of him find the balls to talk to you
So Denki did it for him
"Yo so I got this one friend who want to talk to yo-" "KAMINARI NO PLS"
Can't help but stutter sometimes around you
You can't help but love the stuttering mess of a boy though
KIRISHIMA EIJIRO
Okay but this is your match
Says your confidence is manly
Will show you off if you show him off
Like yes thats his girl right there
You each give each other confidence boosts when you're low on it
Like with Bakugo, training with Kiri is amazing because you don't hold back and you continue to improve and find out new interesting moves with your quirks
"Yo babe that move was sick! Where did you learn that?"
"I dunmo, just kinda happened!"
"Omg we gotta train that, imagine using that out in the field!"
You're each others personal cheerleader
Your confidence to Kiri is so endearing and he loves that about you
Will 100% back you up anything cuz his baby isn't wrong abt anything!
TODOROKI SHOUTO
He also finds your confidence endearing
Like what why are you so cute like that
The thought of dating someone more out there than him never crossed his mind until after people pointed it out
Knows it'll tick off his father but fuck Endeavor we don't support child abusers
He will make sides jokes about you giving him some of your confidence.
"Love, could you spare me some of your confidence. "
"........what-?"
"Your concidence. Can I have some please?"
"Babe that's not how that works."
And he would say it with a straight face, with his whole chest
Shouto wouldn't like someone too clingy I feel, even if he's a touch starved baby
So to have someone who has the capacity to be happy in their own space without needing his presence would be a huge weight off his shoulders i feel.
You two would be out on a date or something and you'd ask him to take some pictures of you in your outfit
Okay but Shouto is the BEST photographer
He gon make sure his love has the perfect lighting and angle for your pictures
And then youll give give him a lil kiss kiss on the cheekie and he'd stand there for a minute wondering what just happened before letting the TINIEST smile form on his lips
You den made his heart go boom boom.
KAMIMARI DENKI
See this fucking flirt right here
He's all over you
If you're a confident flirt prepare for flirting wars.
"Damn, is it hot in here or is it just you?"
"Careful, don't look to long or you might short circuit."
Definitely short circuits from looking at you
cuz fuck how do you wake up looking so amazing
If you could you'd pull up to class with joggers and a t-shirt
And the confidence you give off from wearing something so simple as loungewear would make this boy shock himself
And and he loves the competition
"Its the blindness for me"
"Its the thunderbolt clip for me"
"Its the inability to do math for me"
"Its the short circuiting as soon as you get the test for me"
"Its the- WAIT BABE THATS MEAN!"
He needs someone to go back and forth with until you're doubling over laughing your guts out, and you are the person he can do that with
SHINSOU HITOSHI
So like people have told me that to them shinsou seems like a total bitch and im like EXCUSE YOu
Him just a lost boy who needs a lil guidance
I actually headcanon him wanting a confident s/o who can bring him out his shell a lil
coughcoughherecometheshinkamishipperscough
He does adore how you seem not to care about the world around you and wishes he had that luxury
Will also probably joke about you giving him some of your confidence
"What do you want for your birthday, 'toshi?"
"Some of your confidence would be nice."
"Babe, seriously, whatcha want?"
"I am being serious."
"Omg thats not how this works."
Probably calls you his lil headache
Peep the word his 👀👀
Like with Izuku your confidence will help pull him out his shell little by little
He's not gonna like it though!
But would rather you do it than anyone else
Its been watered down since this morning when the idea first came to mind, but I hope everyone likes it! For some reason, my tags aren't working though I guess its the same for everyone else. Hopefully this gets through though.
Leave a comment, a like, reblog for others to see, and do g hesitate to send me a request!!
#my hero x reader#my hero headcanons#my hero academia#black reader#black tumblr#black academia#poc reader#poc academia#katsuki bakugo x reader#bakugou imagine#bakugou katsuki#bnha bakugo katsuki#bnha headcanons#bnha imagines#midoriya imagine#midoriya x reader#midoriya headcanons#bnha kirishima#denki kaminari imagine#mha kirishima#mha kaminari#shinsou hitoshi#bnha shinsou#black bnha#black mha#todoroki shoto scenarios#todoroki shouto#shouto headcanons
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I know this has probably been done, but IMMA DO IT FOR MY VERSION OF THE BEET!!!
SFW BeetleBlum Alphabet
A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)
Baby is SOOO AFFECTIONATE! Just random compliments throughout the day.
'She almost misspelled throughout.'
B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)
He is so easy to be friends with. It's almost impossible to not be his friend.
'Mmawww, stahhp.'
C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)
KING OF CUDDLES! He likes being both spoons. (He asks to be little more though)
'You ask me to be the big one!'
D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)
Ummm... depends on what you mean by settle down.
'I'm dead.'
Like be a husband? More like a hubby. He can't cook.
'I CAN SO!'
He won't clean.
'.....damn.'
E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)
'Never! Nope! Stop! I don't like this question!'
F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)
'OOOooohhhh!'
Look what you did.
'Marry me?'
We are married.
'Again?'
.....mokay.
G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)
'Hehehehehe...'
Stop! Nnoo! Don't!
'No? Don't stop? I like what I'm hearing.'
He is physically a plushie.
And he is an emotional rollarcoaster.
'That you love to ride!'
STOP!
H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)
He hugs me all the time... he's never not hugging me... he's hugging me now... he's just nodding at me, smiling... and hugging me.
I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)
'I love you.'
That fast.
'You love me?'
Yes.
'Promise?'
Yes.
'.....pinky promise?'
If you hand me a pinky from a corpse, I swear.
J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)
I spoke to Tom today.
'..........'
K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)
Magic kisses! I love kissing this boy!
Where do you like to kiss me?
'Here... and here... and here...a-'
OKAY, Okay, okay... where do you like to be kissed.
'Hmm... lips?'
Classic.
L = Little ones (How are they around children?)
'I hate kids.'
(He loves kids)
'I do not!'
You like kids.
'Kids... are.. okayyy..... I don't love kids.'
Anastasia.
'The only kid I love. She's lucky.'
M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)
'I'm sleeping. She's sleeping. We sleep in.'
N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)
I'm sleeping, he's bothering me.
'I bother you?'
I... no... I'm just trying to sleep.
'I'm just fuckin' with ya.'
O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)
I know everything.
'Don't tell them anything.'
He likes bubble baths.
'AHHH!'
P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)
.....poke.
'Don't touch me.'
He's not easily angered, but... pissed, most def.
Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)
He doesn't remember much.
'I remember tons!'
When's my birthday?
'June 14th.'
No.
'Damn.'
R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)
Well?
'Anytime she compliments me. It's a big self-esteem boost.'
S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)
'Haha, touch her, you die.'
Hey!
'I..... am KEEPING YOU!'
O-okay...geez.
T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)
.....
'So, um... did you like the earrings I got you?'
The ones you made? .....yes.
'I thought the butterflies looked stunning on you.'
Yes... real. Dead. Butterflies.... that were actually moths.
'They looked cute with your sweater!'
U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)
'Uh-oh.'
He over eats, over sleeps...
'Okay. Yep.'
Never exercises. Rarely bathes...
'Right. Sure.'
And lays around the house.
'.....yeah.'
But, I do all that too, so...
'Aww, you really do love me!'
V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)
'Babes'...
You look the same. All the time.
'Gorgeous.'
Dead.
'Drop dead gorgeous.'
W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)
'If you're even thinking about taking her away from me, I will destroy everything you hold dear. No place will be good enough to hide. I will find you. I-'
Yes.
X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)
He totally doesn't care about your hygiene. Like at all. He's dead and been so for a long time. Your personal scent is refreshing to him compared to the sand dunes. Is smelling like soap nice? Of course. Does he care enough that you don't die? Oh, my, yes. But, he truly doesn't care how you manage. Bodily functions do not bother him.
'Everybody shits.'
It's poops.
'Not in the Netherworld.'
Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)
'In general, Delia... but it's like a fuck, marry, kill deal.'
What?
'Wha- huh- I totally married you...'
Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)
He sleeps a lot. Which is fine by me. I do too.
Depression is a bitch.
'She's worse than my mom.'
Your mom's worse than your mom.
'You've never met my aunt.'
#self ship positivity#self ship#self insert#self ship community#self insert community#self ship ask game#self shipper#self shipping#self shipping community#selfshipping#selfshipping community#f/o community#f/o post#f/o#f/o stuff#f/o tag#romantic f/o#beetlejuice#sfw alphabet#sfw#F/O Interviews#53xy
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SG1
Season 5 episode 2
"THRESHOLD"
Notes by me
- PREVIOUSLY - they brainwashed my beefcake!!!!
- pls tell me Jack can make him remember with the power of Bros
- he lying aint he
- BRATAC??? MY BOY???
- bratac knew with just a look that he was lying bro he could tell by his goddamn aura omg
- UM GET YO HAND OUTA THERE
- why you take tealcs baby!!!
- tealc needs to remember his friends OR ELSE
- bra'tac please. All of your methods are violent
- but honestly I cant wait to watch it
- 'let him stew in his own filthy brain until he remembers' is basically whats happening
- bratac saying fraiser is one of tealcs friends and she needs to stay to help him ❤❤❤❤❤
- "I am 100% sur-.........99% sure apophis is dead"
Daniel giving Jack a tiny head shake bc THEY DONT KNOW BITCH!!! EVERYTIME APOPHIS GETS BLOWN UP IT TURNS OUT HE SURVIVES BC HE fuckin CALLED AN UBER TO SAVE HIM BEFORE THE EXPLOSION REACHED HIM or something I dont fuckin know
- omg apophis literally told tealc that his dad shouldve died at an unwinnable battle and his now torturing him and there are still jaffa that stay loyal to them!!!! What the fuck!!!! They treat all the jaffa like shit and they still- I cant take this
- cure for brainwashing: strap him to a bed and have story time about all the memories of you guys braiding daniels hair or something Idk
- this better not awaken anything in me
- "life for the sake of life means nothing"
- I dont want bratac to die :(((((
- story time with Daniel and Jack
- akdhdjdb Daniel sitting down and his mind just goes blank. Head empty no thoughts
- "as your best friend-" !!!!!!!❤❤❤
- "that would make you the most ineffective double agent in the history of double agenting"
- seeing tealc without his gold scar and its just a drawing instead
- "Valar?"
"It sounded like Valour"
"The fabric?"
"Sounded like it"
"WHY would he say that"
"Why would he say Valar???"
- they picked the worse two people to handle this important assignment
- shirtless tealc in the snow???👀
- "I am not blind" but this was a good training thing from bratac bc in one episode you did go blind!!!! So good on bratac for preparing you
- bratac slipping in little anti gods propaganda into his teachings lmfao sneak100
- we love to see my mans building the rebels up from the ground for his father💪
- this is personal for Daniel. He mad
- "do not test my temper, woman" I LEGIT thought he called Daniel a woman for a hot sec
- drey'ac saying how can he not be a god when he can throw balls of light and shit. Imma quote Star Trek on this one sis
"Any sufficiently advanced extraterrestrial intelligence is indistinguishable from god"
- tealc so confused and conflicted and she said you know what you need? Some pussy
- "did he just call me a woman?"
Sjdjdjejdnfnf
- nooooooo fraiser dont resign youre so sexy aha
- "is it working"
"We talked about fabric briefly"
"He called me a woman"
"So yeah its working"
- love how they do this for him. They just sit and talk with him. My kids are all in love
- when tealc has to kill his friend and the rest of the jaffa are like yeah this is normal. NO
- he used it as a test to see if apophis was all knowing and it worked!!! BITCH my boy is SMART
- can I marry tealc is that possible
- I just realised they put candles everywhere for him. Inside the medical bay. I mean cough fire hazard cough but so aesthetic
- he burned his friend along with a whole village :( my god he has been thru some shit
- bratacs outfit. Work bitch
- "men such as you and I have only the comfort of those times we make a difference.......make a difference"
- flash back of tealc choosing to join sg1 bc he got Good Vibes from them
- I agree with friaser about it being tough to watch but bratac has done this before and its their only option
- "I can save these people!......help me"
"Many have said that.......but you are the first I believe could do it!"
- THE FLASHES OF HIM WITH THE TEAM 💖❤💖❤💖❤💖💖❤💖❤💖❤💖❤💖❤💖💖❤
- "I choose freedom"
- is apophis really dead tho. Thats the question for me
- i am crying I am laughing I am singing the clouds are parting the sun is out. I'm so happy we got my hunk back
- thanks bra'tac , your methods were violent but effective none the less.
~
Whump under the cut
Tealc whump: brainwashed, tied to bed, hospital scene, junior taken out, edge of death, ribbon device to forehead, vivid recall, weak sweating, waking up from nightmare, emotional, lasts through out whole episode
🎶listening to Salt by Bad Suns🎶 this song has many meanings for me but listening to the words made me think of this episode 💖
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hamilton vines
burr: so basically, what is was thinking is -
hamilton: punches him
burr: ah fuck, i can't believe you've done this
-
eliza, watching hamilton and laurens: two bros, chillin in a hot tub, five feet apart cause they're not gay
-
hamilton: is there anything better than pussy? yes, a really good book *piano chord*
-
eliza: i should've left you on that street corner where you stood
hamilton: but ya didn't
-
hamilton: hey thomas you think i can get this egg into that jar without it cracking
jefferson: no
hamilton, throwing the egg full force at jefferson: i guess you're right
-
cabinet members, watching hamilton and jefferson fight: can i get a waffle. can i please get a waffle
-
peggy: jello? more like hello *chokes on the jello*
-
jefferson, skating in on wheelies: good evening
-
lafayette, buried in sand: i am the sand guardian, guardian of the sand
mulligan: POSEIDON QUIVERS BEFORE HIM
lafayette to the ocean: fuck off!
-
hamilton: don't fuck with me. i have the power of God and ishmael on my side. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
-
hamilton: toss me my keys
eliza: *throws a christmas tree at him*
hamilton: i said keys
eliza: i thought you said christmas tree!
hamilton: why the f u c k would you think i said-
-
madison: if i had a penny for every time i wasn't cool, i'd have no pennies
-
someone: who's the hottest uber driver you've ever had
maria: um, i never went to oovo javer
-
angelica: saw you hanging out with caitlyn yesterday
hamilton: re-rebecca, it's not what you think!
angelica: i won't hesitate, biTCH
-
hamilton: yo, what's the scoop?
laurens, biking up: penis
-
burr to angelica: other guys'll just feed you lines. but i'll take you to mickey-deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeees!
-
jefferson, madison, and burr coming to hamilton about the reynolds affair: you ready to fuckin' die?
hamilton: i'm a bad bitch, you can't kill me
-
washinton: people are constantly asking me "what's it like to be a sex symbol?"
washington: *slips and bangs his head hard*
-
hamilton: i'm sucking my own dick and dying
-
hamilton: and they were roommates
jefferson: oh my god they were roommates
-
eliza to phillip: if your name is junior, and you're really handsome, c'mon raise your hand
phillip: *bashfully raises his hand*
-
angelica: hey, i'm lesbian
phillip: i thought you were american
-
maria: hey alexander
alexander: sup bitch
maria: haha stop
alexander: bitch
maria: SFISJOAIFJSOIF UGH
-
jefferson: oh sorry i fell asleep while i was waiting on you to make me a sandwich
angelica: go back to sleep and starve
-
phillip: hey mom say "who want lasagna"
eliza: who want lasagn-
eliza: *runs into the kitchen counter*
-
burr: you know, sometimes i think to myself "what are you waiting for you dumb stupid fuck"
-
angelica: go suck a dick! suck a dick! suck a dick! suck a motherfucking dick
eliza: suck a dick! suck a huge or small dick
-
washington just before resigning: i don't know what fuck just happened, but i don't really care, imma get the fuck up outa here, fuck this shit i'm out
-
peggy: before i die, i'm gonna finish a chapstick without loosing it
peggy, two hours later: i lost that motherfucker
-
hamilton to washington: you are my dad (you're my dad!) boogie woogie woogie
-
angelica: two shots of vodka...
angelica: *pours the whole bottle in*
-
madison: hey how much you pay for that taco
jefferson: hey you know this boy's got his free taco
jefferson: *slips, falls, and drops the taco*
-
peggy: hey do you want to go out to eat
eliza: no, i don't really want to
peggy: you're right, why would we go out when we have
angelica, eliza, and peggy: canned soup
-
lafayette: i'm washing me and my clothes, bitch
laurens: he's drunk as fuck...
lafayette: i'm washing me AND my clothes
-
genie: i am a genie and i will grant you three w-
hamilton: i'd like to immediatly take your place
genie: really? i was trapped in there for 10,000 years of isolated slumber
hamilton, clapping his hands: i know
#hamilton#vines#please ask me to do this for a different show#PLEASE I BEG OF YOU#vines and musicals are the only two things i care about#musical theatre memes#musical theatre#broadway#broadway memes#lin manuel miranda#yall are nasty for making the tag 'linxreader#leslie odom jr#renee elise goldsberry#philippa soo#lams#alexander hamilton
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