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clarktooncrossing · 5 months

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Giraffe's Eye View: Christmas Specials Special | Klaus

Chestnuts are roasting on an open fire. Jack Frost is nipping at your nose. Mom and dad can hardly wait for school to start again. All the dogs in the neighborhood somehow learned to bark Jingle Bells in sync. Yet retail workers are still more annoyed with Mariah Carey. Snow is getting shoveled, tossed, and formed into sentient beings leading parades without permits. It makes for an excellent distraction as the Krampus abducts children for bad behavior. Fruitcake is exchanged only to find its permanent home in the garbage. Terrorists have hijacked the Holiday office party right before your boss can give you a Jelly of the Month Club membership as your bonus. And of course, the Turducken has returned to wreak its fiery vengeance upon an unsuspecting world! If all this doesn’t put you in the Christmas spirit, perhaps these following Holiday specials will!

Greetings people of today and robots of tomorrow! It is I, Santa Clark, your geeky giraffe friend with a deep love of Christmas! My obsession for the yuletide is rivaled only by Maleficent’s hatred for it, which is saying a lot considering she once teamed up with Mad Madam Mim to kidnap the literal Spirit of Christmas. Yes, that really happened. I know this due to my annual pilgrimage to the Island of Misfit Specials, home to obscure or nerdy festive media ranging from movies, TV episodes, and comics. It’s no easy journey. Constantly I find myself confronted by sinister snowmen, genocidal gingerbread men, and worst of all, crappy commercials. Getting stabbed in the foot by a candy-cane wielding cookie is one thing, but I swear I’ve seen that ad for Wilbur’s White Elephant Gift Emporium more times than I’ve seen Miracle on 34th Street! Sometimes at night I catch myself reciting that jingle. Wilbur’s White Elephant Gift Emporium: Where Christmas meets Convenience! Huh, maybe Maleficent had a point.

Nah, my deep-rooted appreciation for this time of year can weather even the most moronic marketing! It helps that most of the merry media I’ve seen have put me in the perfect Holiday mood! Examples include the time a Ninja Turtle found himself trapped in a truck full of stollen toys, a drunk department store Santa stumbling onto a wish-granting magic bag, Big Bird nearly becoming a popsicle, Gwenpool waking up in a world where Galactus took the place of jolly ol’ Saint Nicholas, a terrifying tree stump trying to slaughter some saps over a stupid ship war, and the year when Death gave the Little Match Girl the greatest gift of all. Needless to say, I thought I had seen it all. That is, until I took my friends on a trip to the Island, tasking them to find me new, strange, seasonal specials to review! Some of them were fair, finding me festive favorites as comforting as coco in front of the fireplace. Others were fiendish, wanting to feed off my misery like Gremlins after midnight. Regardless of how naughty or nice my companions were, I’ve compiled all of their suggestions into a makeshift advent calendar! So stay tuned everyday until Christmas to see how badly my buddies can shred what little sanity I have left.

On the seventh day of Christmas, my buddies gave to me...

Netflix has never made my Nice List. Even back in their Blockbuster killing days I thought they were overrated. After all, what’s so cool about an overpriced service that didn’t have Jurassic Park? Now that they’ve spawned steep competition, heightened their prices, and constantly cancel any popular series they produce, it seems the rest of the world is finally singing the same song. Welcome to the Netflix Sucks Club, everyone! However, in defense of the house Stranger Things built, they are running circles around Disney in regards to cartoons. Along with streaming sensational shows like She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, Jurassic World: Camp Cretaceous, and The Dragon Prince, they’re also home to some equally amazing animated movies. Movies such as Nimona, The Mitchells vs the Machines, and of course Klaus. Their origin story for Santa came out at just the right time and has quickly become a seasonal staple for many peeps around the world. Including in Barcelona, home to the artistic android AN-D (Void-Android). So how did this flick become so instantly beloved?

For starters, it’s unspeakably gorgeous! Good lord, I’d be insane not to praise the phenomenal talent poured into every frame. The expressive characters, their energetic motion, all of the breath-taking backdrops enhanced by enriched lighting, this is easily one of the prettiest pictures of the past few years. Words fail in describing how amazing the art is. It’s right up there alongside Spider-Verse or Puss in Boots: The Last Wish. Makes sense considering all three utilize a style combining the hand-drawn animation of yesterday with the technological trickery of today. Everything is so beautifully blended that I genuinely have a hard time telling where one method ends and the other begins. Which was the point. Director / Character Animator Segio Pablos theorized the reason 2D animation had yet to make a comeback was due to how it had failed to evolve. Features like Treasure Planet or The Princess and the Frog paired their riveting plots with visuals trying too hard to recapture the magic of the old days. So when Pablos formed his own studio, the cleverly named Sergio Pablos Animation, he was determined to make something special. In his own words, “It was important to me that the film did not feel like it could come out of any other studio, and that it had its own personality without losing the broad appeal that’s expected from a high-end holiday film.”

That’s a quote from Ramin Zahed’s Klaus: The Art of the Movie, a book I highly recommend reading. Not only are you treated to page upon page of fantastic behind-the-scenes concepts, but you also get to hear how Batman Begins served as inspiration. Honestly it matches up once you dive into the plot.

People need dramatic examples to shake them out of apathy. Or laziness, in the case of Jesper Johanson (Jason Schwartzman). He’s a millennial mailman so spoiled he nearly rivals the Kardashians. Key difference being Jesper’s genuinely entertaining. Furthermore, this brat has a father who actually cares about him, threatening to cut off his trust fund unless he delivers six thousand letters by year’s end. Should be easy given this takes place long before email was invented, right?

Wrong! Like any good parent, the Postmaster General knows his son will be forever doomed to fail if he doesn’t exercise some tough love. It doesn’t get much tougher than sending him to the small, northern island of Smeerensburg. Here the bitter chill of winter is rivaled only by the searing hatred between the town’s two prominent families; the Ellingboes and the Krums. Neither clan remembers how their feud started. Really, when did details like that matter? It’s tradition! What’s important is the disdain that divides them! A mindset later adapted for Twitter! It’s an ideology that’s sadly enforced onto their offspring, too. Snow will fall in Southtown, USA before they allow the spawn of their sworn enemies to mingle! Shun out those who are different from you, even if the only separating factor is their hair color! Wow, it’s so realistic it’s painful. They’re not even allowed to attend school together, much to the frustration of the local teacher Alva (Rashida Jones). Arriving eight years ago hoping to guide youths towards a bright, better tomorrow, now she’s selling fish so she can escape this dump. Getting away from this petty rivalry is all that matters. Both sides are firmly set in their ways, not letters needed to express any ire. Looks like our desperate protagonist needs a miracle!

Enter our titular Klaus, a bearded behemoth voiced by the legendary J.K. Simmons. Contrasting other cinematic Kringles, our initial impression of this legendary figure is that of a gruff, grumpy loner longing to be left alone. He’s a man living far out in the woods building birdhouses in memoriam of his long lost wife. Yup, Mrs. Claus is dead! Merry Christmas! Before the two had hoped to fill their house with happy children, the gentle giant filling his barn to the brim with hand-crafted toys in anticipation. With those dreams dashed, he has no purpose other than waiting to die. That is until Jesper accidentally drops off a depressed drawing swindled from a sad boy. Seeing someone in need, the weary woodsman wrangles the wormy weakling into helping him deliver one of his many toys; a wind-up frog. It’s while watching the kid playing in the window that we get our first glimpse of the good man inside. For the first half of the runtime, Simmons scarcely says a word. You’d be forgiven for forgetting he was in this at all! Yet like any great animated feature worth its salt, the visuals express everything. A spark can be seen in Santa’s eyes when he witnesses the happiness brought onto another. In that moment he’s given a reason to live again.

Lucky for Jesper, said reason is his ticket out of here. Turns out the kid had caught Santa staring through the window. Presuming his letter’s what led to a shiny new toy, word is quickly spread amongst his peers, all quickly forming a line around the post office. Seizing the opportunity, the courier convinces Klaus to donate more of his toys for tots, under the condition they do so in secret under nightfall. As more gifts are given out, legends of the mysterious merry man grow. Most of it predicated on lies and deception. It’s an aspect of the story that really bugs me, sad to say. Personally I prefer how Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town handled this detail, organically explaining how a humble toymaker became the mythical figure we know and love today. Sure, most of it is based in magic, but we’re talking about a guy who traverses the world all in one night on a sled led by reindeer. As I hope my earlier rant in the Flash made clear, logic need not apply here. Layering Batman in a grounded reality makes a strange sort of sense, not so much Papa Noel. For example, the reason Klaus swaps out his horse for reindeer in the first place is because Jesper doesn’t want to lighten the load of presents. More presents equals more letters! Worst of these fabrications is the Naughty List. One little snot found a clump of coal in his stocking, threatening to make like the Power Rangers and mutilate the mailman lest he get answers. Putting aside that it was in fact Jesper who pulled the dirty deed, he terrifies the tubby tike by stating Santa knows when he’s been sleeping. He knows when you’re awake. He knows if you’ve been bad or good, so be good for goodness sake. Only the ornery ones end up on the Naughty List.

Upon learning of the list, an unexpected domino effect triggers throughout the community. First the kids start behaving better, performing good deeds such as shoveling snow, painting over graffiti, cleaning clarinets, helping out with the laundry, picking berries, nursing a stubborn senior who broke his foot, even going to school at Jesper’s suggestion. An astonished Alva learns to love teaching again, going so far as to spend her savings to spruce up the schoolhouse. Now some may argue this is only happening because these brats want a reward. Fair enough, it’s not an unfair assumption to make. Provided you ignore the adults mirroring that attitude. Despite nobody giving them anything, they’re still acting neighborly towards each other. Why? Because kindness is infectious! It’s a mindset the cynics of the world will undoubtedly scoff at. Let’m keep their dour worldview. Humans are far more hospitable than given credit for. Klaus himself puts it best: a true selfless act always sparks another. Jesper himself scoffs at first, until he meets a sweet little Sami girl named Márgu (Neda Margrethe Labba). Look up ‘cute’ in the dictionary and there’ll be a picture of her. Those protesting otherwise may also expect clumps of coal in their socks! Good gosh, she deserves all the hugs! Although she’ll settle for a sled. Throughout the picture we see her ask Jesper for help in writing a letter to Klaus so she can receive one. Eventually he concedes, asking Alva to translate before helping Klaus build the sled himself. It’s when he delivers it and sees Márgu eagerly ride it that we see that same spark twinkle in the mailman’s eyes too. Perhaps his colossal colleague was onto something after all.

Do the clan elders care? Nope. Realizing their resentful lifestyle is fleeting, both agree to a ceasefire to cancel Christmas. Now that’s the true reason for the season: uniting under a common hatred! Joy to the world!

By then, Jesper’s forgotten about his selfish status quo, contempt with settling down in Smeerensburg. He’s ready to help his friend deliver more presents to the pipsqueaks, now aided additionally by Alva and Márgu’s Sami tribe. Imagine his surprise when dear daddy arrives to escort him back home. All six-thousand letters have been delivered, partially thanks to the malicious machinations of the elders. One would assume they’d burn the barn down due to its location being public knowledge, but then we wouldn’t be subjected to the liar revealed trope. Now in fairness to this classic cliche, How to Train Your Dragon demonstrated that it can work well to strengthen the story. Stoic is a stubborn man set in his ways, it makes sense that he’d ignore anything Hiccup has to say. Jesper's pals suddenly acting pissy doesn't. What, because everything he said was a lie? Okay, but he still changed all your lives for the better, so what does it matter? In her review, Cellspex proposes that Jesper’s friends should’ve allowed him to leave, a true selfless act that in turn would’ve prompted him to stay. That would’ve tied back to the thesis of the narrative while also feeling less forced. Otherwise it’s so obnoxious going through the motions. Inevitably Jasper returns to save the day, they partake in a chase scene minus Klaus flying on rooftops in a big, black tank, and all is forgiven. In the end the elders are forced to reconcile as two of their own fall in love, Jesper lives a happy life with Alva and their kids, and Klaus eventually dies. Merry Christmas! Or does he? As a man Santa is flesh and blood. He can be ignored, he can be destroyed, but as a symbol? He can be incorruptible! Everlasting, even. Jesper can’t comprehend what happened to him after that. He stopped trying to make sense of it a long time ago. What he does know is that once a year he gets to see his friends again. So long as love, generosity, and devotion still exist, so too does Klaus.

Overall, Klaus is a flawed masterpiece that’s earned its seasonal staple status. Artistically it shines like a diamond! Storywise is where the smudges are shown. Pablos accomplished his agenda in elevating the animated artform, but failed to do so narratively. Ironically it's the opposite problem he proclaimed most cartoon pictures once had. This feels like what happens when The Emperor’s New Groove, Santa Claus is Comin’ to Town, Cars, and Batman Begins are all mixed in a blender. It’s a familiar flavor, though not a terrible one. If nothing else, it's a fun, festive film with vibrant visuals, a charismatic cast, and at least one sensational song. I sincerely hope more movies are made like this in the future, even if they end up on Netflix. The future of animation looks bright! Wait, that’s not the future. Some random Christmas carnival is on fire! Quick, throw cards at it!

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