#This ws supposed to be longer

[myfictionaldreams]

Hi, hello! I see requests are open and if you’re liking this idea, I hope you enjoy writing it. If not, it’s more than okay🙈🥺

OKAY OOKKAAAY!!

What if the winter soldier was triggered because of the high amount of stress + torture Bucky goes through while kidnapped by whoever.

Yes the Wakanda’s deprogrammed the soldat but no one really thought pass that. So when Bucky is kidnapped and put under that stress the WS is triggered, comes out to save himself/ Bucky from it

My Little Sun // Bucky/WS x fem!reader

A/N: Thank you so much for the request! I hope you enjoy ღ

Tags: sfw, lots of angst, fluff, description of injuries, reference to torture, trauma response, anxiety, crying, overprotective (to the absolute max), possessive, sam wilson is a great friend

Words: 5.3k

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The days were endless but the nights were torturous when he wasn’t there. The silence, the coolness of the sheets, the empty coffee cup left on the side, it wasn’t how it was supposed to be and that only made it all the more difficult to be in your home.

“I’ll be back in a few days Doll, it’s not supposed to be a big deal anyway, Sam just needs an extra pair of super strong hands”. Bucky always attempted to use his humour to try and ease the anxieties he knew that would be your worst enemy whilst he was away.

Hundreds of missions you’d been there to wave him off, and welcomed him back without even a scratch but this only made it worse, your luck had to run out eventually, right?

Not that your and Bucky's story was the happiest, to begin with. The two of you had been together since Hydra days, having been the Winter Soldier’s nurse until Alexander Pierce noticed the Asset responded better to your orders. For years and years, he only trusted you, even through the mental “resets” or being frozen, the Winter Solider would only trust you. This had its positives and negatives that Pierce liked to use against you but, when Steve Rogers finally found out about his best friend was alive, everything changed. This wasn’t the end of your story though, for two years following this, the two of you were on the run, then lived in Wakanda, saying a farewell to Winter Soldier, then the blip. Both of you were gone for five years which you were in a way thankful for, not sure either could cope without the other and now, after Steve was gone, Bucky was on the road to recovery - with the additional missions with Sam Wilson.

This wasn’t as bad for you but having returned to nursing meant that you couldn’t always be there when he returned or be able to check your phone for updates. At least the role kept you busy, as the days ticked by and finally, as the day of his return was due, you were stuck on restocking, which meant you could stare at your phone, waiting for the jet to return.

The second the phone buzzed, you were off, heart hammering in your chest with the adrenaline, rushing to the headquarters.

Maybe it was your anxiety that overthought the atmosphere in the room, overthinking why it was so quiet, no rushing of agents to unload the jet. It had to also be your anxiety as to why no one seemed to look into your eye or even smile and wave at your arrival, everyone was probably tired.

As you waited in your usual spot, your foot tapping anxiously against the stone floor, it was taking a lot longer to unload the jet. Eventually, an agent approached, suggesting you sit in one of the conference rooms, at least there you could sit down with a glass of water. They were just being polite, there was definitely nothing wrong, even as the 30-minute wait time turned into an hour. You tried to keep your spirits up, knowing that if those negative whispers at the back of your mind started to shout, you’d lose all composure. It was only a few days that they’d been away, only to infiltrate some stolen goods from being trafficked across the borders.

But then, it was strangely close to a known Hydra camp that had been whispered about throughout the underground market with recent activity. A shiver passed through your body at even the mere thought of the name that had ruined so many people's likes, it was almost like a swear word you weren’t allowed to think about.

The years of torture, life-ruining time spent with those demons and through it all Bucky was your saving grace, he always had been, even with the Asset’s mindset. There had always been hope and that had come in the shape of Steve Rogers and most importantly Shuri, giving the Winter soldier the peace to be deprogrammed and allowing Bucky to try and proceed with the life he should have had. Even though it had been years, there was always a small inkling in your mind that the Winter Soldier was ready to be released beneath the surface, something just holding him back and with one wrong move he would be set free and chaos would be caused. 

So as the minutes ticked by, waiting and waiting, the anxiety soon felt like impending doom, your chest ready to split open in fear.

Then finally, after nearly two hours of waiting, it all came crashing down as Sam Wilson slowly opened the door by himself, shutting it soundly behind him. He was still in his Captain America uniform, blood and dirt coating it.

You had stood as soon as the door handle turned, facing Sam, tears welling in your eyes, all control disappearing. Attempting to look into the light in the ceiling to stop the tears from falling, something wasn’t sitting right in your gut, it hadn’t for days, almost like an intuition.

“Is he dead?” your voice wobbled as you tried to hold on from having a complete meltdown, knees locking to stop from shaking and falling.

Sam took a deep breath, making sure to look you in the eye. “He’s not dead, but he hasn’t returned with us. We were ambushed”.

“Who…”

“Hydra”.

That one word, the tainted ugly word was enough to have your body giving up on any strength that it had retained. Sam was quick to catch you before you slammed to the floor, easing the seat beneath you and pouring a glass of fresh water, making sure you took a sip before sitting in the seat next to you.

His hand rested on yours as it lay in your lap, as he began to explain the situation and you were so very grateful for your friend, not trusting yourself to speak at that current moment.

They’d been ambushed, the entire operation was a setup and even the agents, specifically, Bucky was able to hold the enemy back, eventually, they had surrounded him and before Sam could reach him, they had gone.

“I knew this would happen” you eventually declared, looking at Sam’s tired face. “I knew they would get to him, I’ve heard the rumours and the threats but no one seemed to take them seriously! Sam what if they-”

“I know what you’re going to say but that will not happen, Ok? Zemo’s tried it, and others have attempted it. Bucky is just Bucky, Shuri has made sure that the Winter Soldier was deprogrammed so let’s try not to lose control here, we need to concentrate on getting him back and safely.”

There was no reason to disagree with him but the thoughts continued to send you into a panic, spiralling through your head causing only more detriment to your mental health but you wouldn’t verbally say them, wouldn’t want to manifest them into a reality.

“He’s not dead, I would know if he were”, you knew it didn’t make sense, you didn’t have a tracker on his heart but through everything the two of you had shared, it was almost like a silent connection. He often joked that you were both two of the same coin and you truly believed that too.

“He’s not, I believe that too, they wouldn’t want to kill him so quickly”. Saying it like that had sour bile threatening to spill from your mouth so you forced yourself to drink another sip of water, silent tears dripping down your cheeks.

“So what do we do now? Are there people searching for him?”

“Of course, we have everyone out there searching the area, drones are scanning the ground to sense any underground holdings. We aren’t stopping for even a moment. The only reason I’ve returned is that I wanted to be the one to tell you and get some more supplies”.

You tried to half-ass a smile, looking back at Sam with sincerity. “Thank you, I do appreciate it coming from you Sam. What time do we go-”

“That’s the other reason I’m here because I know you’d somehow get involved in the search and I’m sorry but I can’t have you anywhere near the site.”

The overwhelming urge to shout took over your body so much that you had to take a deep breath, rolling back your shoulders, ignoring the heat that had settled in your cheeks. “Listen, Sam, I can be useful please, I know what Hydra are like”.

“I understand that but, you’ve got to see it from my perspective as well. They’ve got Bucky, now what would happen if they also captured you too? What could they make Bucky do if you were in harm's way?  Even without the Winter Soldier, Bucky would kill anyone if it meant keeping you protected so there’s no way I’m letting that happen.”

This also made sense but it still didn’t stop your stomach from clenching as you refrained from arguing. As you tried to settle your emotions, you took in your friend, really looked at him and saw the overwhelming exhaustion and fear settled within his eyes.

“We’ll find him, Sam. Come on, I’ll clean you up, that’s a nasty scratch you’ve got there”, referring to the gash across his forehead. You wanted to be a good friend as much as he has been for you but also, it was a good distraction to fall into work habits.

Working soon became your only salvation, after looking after Sam and watching him return to the jet, you’d made your way back to work yourself. It was the only distraction that had worked and after nearly three days, it had quickly consumed your life, having not returned home once since discovering the news. If you weren’t working, you were sleeping in the changing rooms, showering there, eating vending machine food and returning for the shift.

If you didn’t do this, you’d have a complete and utter breakdown and it also stopped you from getting into a car or plane and going out to where he had been taken. You were sure that the agents were becoming fed up with your ungodly amount of phone calls but every update was needed, even though there had currently been absolutely nothing.

Eventually on the fourth day, your superior ordered you to go home for a full 12 hours but this only meant that you could go back to the office and watch the agents work. None of them asked you to leave which you were thankful for but it was an endless cycle after this, working as a nurse and then sitting with agents.

Four days soon turned into eight which was also when Sam returned again. He’d been out there every single day searching for Bucky, trying to find any clues and it was mostly his activity that you’d watch on the screen day after day.

Sam approached behind you, laying a hand on your shoulder, “let's go for a walk”.

You didn’t want to argue, following behind him as he led the way to the grounds, it felt odd to be outside for this amount of time.

“They called you back to talk to me, didn’t they?” You knew that your behaviour wasn’t normal but it was the only coping mechanism that you could handle right now and you weren’t interfering with anyone either.

“I’ve had my boss and your boss on the phone with me so yes, you’re quite the hot topic. I know you’re worried, I get it, I am too. But you’re going to kill yourself waiting around or working too hard. You need to go home, sweetheart, get some rest, and have an actual meal. If anything happens you’ll be the first person that I call.”

“I can’t go home Sam, not without him, we were supposed to go back together!”, any hope of salvaging the tears was useless as they began to drip down your cheeks.

“I understand that, but you know Buck would kill me if I didn’t look after you so for all of our sakes, let me please drive you home and I’ll even pick you up in the morning but I need you to look after yourself for once.”

The exhaustion truly hit you then, hoping that maybe you were so tired that you’d get in and fall asleep immediately, not having to think about the empty apartment. Eventually, you agreed to Sam’s request, letting him drive you back to your building which you stared at for a few minutes upon arrival, not making any effort to actually leave the safe space within the car. 

“You can do this, if you need anything I’m just at the end of the phone”, he attempted to motivate you, which you were thankful for.

Turning to him in the car, you smiled softly, probably for the first time in eight days, “thanks Sam, I’m lucky to have you in my life”.

“If you keep talking like that you might even make me cry”, he tried to joke, pulling a genuine smile to your cheeks as you exited the car and finally made your way into the apartment. For a good two minutes, you silently stared at the front door, taking a step forward and as the key entered, a small sob escaped your mouth.

The apartment had never looked so dark before as the sun began setting outside, much too quiet as you stepped in. Bucky liked to always have noise even as he slept, mostly from a distraction from his thoughts so you took a leaf out of his book and rushed to turn on the TV.

The background did help slightly, rushing to shower and load the washer but the place felt haunting, even though this was all in your head. Attempting to keep busy, you cleaned the apartment, emptying the contents fridge that held a lot of gone-off food, the milk having solidified so quickly, you threw it into the trash.

Heading downstairs, you disposed of the trash bag into the dumpsters, taking your time to go back as the stars twinkled in the night sky above.

Just as you were outside your apartment door, you stopped. On the floor, was a singular drop of blood at the threshold of the door, that you’d left open as the area was usually secure.

Patting your body quickly for your phone, you cursed for leaving it on the side. Also, you checked that somehow you’d not scratched yourself or even had a nosebleed but there was nothing. The sensible decision would have been leaving the building and not coming back but something within you drew you into the apartment, stepping quietly and turning on the main light, illuminating the kitchen and living room area.

Bucky’s name whispered at the back of your thoughts but you couldn’t let your hopes be lifted. There were no further blood spots anywhere in your home, and as you entered the bedroom, the last room to check, there were no signs of anything wrong, nothing was out of your place, even your phone was still left laying on the side as you reentered the main living space.

This was when a force bulldozed into you, a large hand covering your mouth and a sharp knife held at your throat, pressing over your artery as the weight pushed you back until colliding with the wall. Momentarily you were winded but the sight before you had instant tears welling in your eyes, a sob bubbling in your throat, the hand over your mouth stopping you from crying out the name, Bucky.

There he was, standing over you and there was so much to take in. He was coated in dirt and blood, fresh and dried. Cuts, grazes, gashes, bruises, every form of injury littered the exposed parts of his body, the rest were covered in filthy joggers and a shirt that you suspected to once be grey but now were mixed between black and red, especially the large blood patch in his abdomen that looked fresh.

Bucky had super soldier serum, he would always heal quicker than others, in fact, the paper-thin scratches that you noticed should have healed as you looked at them to nothing more than a pink line but they stayed, unhealed.

However, through everything, it was his eyes that had your thoughts screaming on red alert. The eyes, the stare, that you hadn’t seen in years.

Not panicking was key so even with the knife at your throat, you dropped your shoulders, showing you had no fear, the Winter Soldier always hated when you looked frightened of him. The usual soft clear blue eyes of Bucky were now hard and slightly glazed over as he looked down at your shorter form.

Trying to maintain your courage and not falter, you began to lift your hands, palms up, showing that there are no weapons and you meant no harm but the Asset already knew this. Taking a risk, you wrapped your hands around his wrists, gently earring them away from their hold against you.

The Winter Soldier did not fight it at all.

“Soldier?” you asked tentatively as his hand was removed from your mouth.

The Asset collapsed and any attempt you had to catch him was in vain as he weighed a lot more than you could carry but thankfully, you managed to cup the back of his head before it collided with the floor.

“Buck- Soldier? Open your eyes, please!” desperately you cradled his face, stroking both thumbs against his bruised cheekbones but he was out cold, not even his eyes flickered.

Nurse mode kicked in as you instantly went to the dark area at his abdomen, lifting his shirt to see a stab wound that was still bleeding slowly. Rushing off your feet, you grabbed the first aid pack from the cupboard as well as your phone, leaving it at your side to quickly put pressure onto the wound. 

This woke him up as he grunted in pain, his breaths leaving him in quick bursts as he attempted to grip your wrists.

“Shh it’s ok, I’m going to look after you, I just need to stop the bleeding, I know it hurts, I’m sorry”.

“Солнышко”, he whispered a name that you had not heard in a long time. Years ago, the Soldier had whispered it to you so no one could hear. Eventually, it was the only name he would call you, and one day, it was translated for you. “Little sun”. As he began to regain his memories after escaping Hydra, he would talk about why this name, only repeating that you were his light in a world full of darkness, therefore, his little sun.

“It’s ok, Soldier, you’re going to feel better, I just need you to stay still, let go of my wrists”.

He did instantly, always listening to you.

The wound was still bleeding, and you silently cursed at yourself for not having more resources to care for him but every time you’d care for his wounds after a mission recently, it had been at the facility. “What did they do to you?” your words were only a whisper, a question more for yourself as the panic began to set in. 

Glancing up into his eyes, you found that he had passed out again, allowing you to call someone. Easing one hand off of the wound, quickly unlocking your phone and selecting the first name to pop up, it answers within two rings.

“It’s not even been two hours yet, that’s not enough time-” Sam tried to joke on the other end of the line but you had to cut him off.

“He’s here”.

Sam paused for a second like he didn’t quite understand what you’d said. 

“What? What do you mean he’s there-”

“I mean, what I said Sam! He’s here, passed out on the floor and he's injured sam, I need some help, please!”

“Ok, ok I’ll get the medics to go to your apartment, I’ll head there now as well.”

“Wait Sam, that’s not the only thing. He’s not- He’s not Bucky”.

“Shit.” Sam cursed loudly.

“I can’t have them taking him away again”, you needed the medics but the risk of the Winter Soldier waking up in a room full of strangers was only bound to end in danger.

“They won’t take him away sweetheart, I’ll contact Shuri, it’ll be ok, we’ll sort out a plan.”

And this is exactly what they did. Turning up in force, you rushed to grab the equipment, ignoring the guns that were being pointed at Bucky.

“No one touches him but me, do you all understand?” Everyone agreed, Sam thankfully then turned up and was able to have the guns pointed somewhere than where you were. Eventually, it was decided that they would sedate him which was probably the best option compared to being on guard with guns. Even on transfer to the facility where he would heal, you stayed by his side, cleaning his wounds and suturing a few gashes. After all the scans and investigations, it was determined that other than the stab wound, he had a broken wrist, cracked three ribs, several fingernails missing and head to toe, covered in bruises, cuts and grazes and IV lines were giving him pain medication and antibiotics, he looked a mess.

He had stayed sedated for another day, allowing his body to try and heal. Sam had attempted to send you home once more, but in the end, you had agreed to change into some cream joggers and a t-shirt and then made a little nest next to his bed in the most comfortable chair available.

You’d dozed in your chair for a couple of hours, waking up to find Sam standing behind you but luckily no one else was, the armed guards currently waiting outside as the sedation was wearing off. 

This wasn’t the only precaution and even after arguing about it for hours, they still placed, large cuffs across his body, particularly his metal arm, just in case he woke.

“He’s just gotten out of imprisonment and now he’s back in it”, you mumbled quietly, looking up and down his body.

“It’s not forever, it’s just a precaution”, Sam tried to ease your anxiety, something he seemed to be doing a lot of these days but you were thankful for your friend staying until Bucky woke up.

Leaning across the bed, you held the metal hand, the feeling giving some comfort.

“This feels weird waiting for the Winter Soldier to wake up and you’re just casually there holding his hand.”

Smiling sadly at Sam’s statement, you continued to watch Bucky, or should you be say the Winter Soldier? It was all so confusing, and there was still some hope that it would be Bucky waking up. 

Just as your eyes became heavy, Bucky’s hand suddenly flinched in yours and instantly you were sitting further up on your chair, leaving over him.

“Bucky?” your fingers drifted through his short brunette hair. At first, his eyes didn’t open but he furrowed his brows like he was willing himself to wake up. “It’s ok, I’m here, I’m not going anywhere”, you whispered, leaning in to kiss his forehead, mindful of his injuries. Standing back up, his eyes were now open, staring at you and now it was noticeable that the whites of his eyes were stained with red but at least he could open them properly.

“Buc- … Soldier? How do you feel?” at the near mention of Bucky’s name, the heart rate monitor began to increase in speed so you resorted back to trying to calm him. “You’re safe, it’s ok. Your wounds aren’t healing like they usually would so I’m just keeping a close eye on you.”

“They laced the knives with a special solution”. You’d not expected him to speak so soon, it was gruff from lack of use but his tone was softer than anything the Soldier had ever used.

“What?”

“They bathed the knives in some green solution before cutting me and it’s stopped me from healing.” The sick feeling returned to your stomach with full force, dreading to ever find out what had happened that they had tortured him enough for the Winter Soldier to come out.

“You’re healing well now though which is the main thing. It just might have to be at the same rate as us normal lot”.

Leaning forward once more, your lips softly kissed his temple, fingers still coming through his hair. The sound of his shackles shaking had you looking down at his hands, he’d tried to reach for you too but had been restricted. The Asset also looked down in confusion as to why he was being chained up but his eyes didn’t even glance at the straps, instead, he saw Sam at the end of his bed.

“Soldier, it’s fine, they’re friendly, they just want to help you.”

This wasn’t enough for him, the heart rate spiking to a dangerous level as his muscles struggled against the cuffs, his body straining as he tried to escape. “Calm down Soldier, listen to me Buck-Soldier, stop please, it’s safe!”

It was no use as the more he struggled, the more the guards were getting antsy and before long they were entering the room and pointing their guns at him. Sam began shouting now but that made no difference as the Asset had ripped his arms out of the shackles and the other cuffs were like pieces of string, easily ripped off.

“Point your guns somewhere else! Please get out, I don’t want him to hurt you”, it was complete and utter chaos, you were sure your heart was beating as fast as the one displayed on the monitor. “Stop pulling them out, they are there to help you”, you shouted at the Soldier as he ripped the IVs out of his arm and detached himself from the monitors. 

In the next second, his metal arm was gripping around your middle as he raced out of the bed, staggering slightly with his injuries but that didn’t deter him from pushing you into the corner, standing in front with only his hospital gown on. 

Now you were even more confused. The Winter Soldier was the world’s most dangerous assassin and on many occasions, he had killed to protect you but here he was, not making that step to kill anyone, simply just standing in front of you, being a barrier between the guns and your person.

“Everyone needs to stop this, now!” Sam shouted, holding his hands out in front of the guards.

Placing your hand in the middle of the Soldier’s back, you tried to speak to him, “you- you don’t need to protect me from these people, they are your friends Soldat”.

“I know who they are”, he revealed, looking at Sam now. “I’m not the Soldier, not to the fullest extent. I still have my mind but he’s there at the forefront, I want to kill you all but not because I’ve been ordered to but because I need to protect- WE, need to protect her but I can’t get through to him that you’re safe to be around.”

“Oh Bucky”, you muttered, laying your forehead against his back for a second, savouring his warmth before standing on your tip toes to look over his shoulder. “Please can you leave us for a moment, even if it's just outside the door, I just need you all to leave us”.

It took some stern words from Sam and arguments before they relented and exited, with Sam giving a final nod before thankfully closing the door, leaving the two of you in peace.

“Sit down before you hurt yourself anymore”, you encouraged Bucky as he held onto the stab wound, turning to face where you stood in the corner of the room. Your breaths were coming out in quick bursts, as your eyes flicked between his two confused ones.

Lifting his metal hand, he gently cupped your cheek which you thankfully grabbed, holding it there, having never been more grateful for a moment until now.

“You look sad, and you haven’t been eating properly”, he uttered, looking across your face.

Brushing away his hands, “Yes well, I’m going to be pissed if you don’t get into this bed right now!”

“Yes ma’am” he retorted with the sarcastic tone you’d grown so fond of. Bucky grunted as he eased himself into bed, brushing away the mess left behind by the destroyed cuffs. 

As you began to sit in your seat, he requested, “lie with me”.

“Nice try Barnes but there will be no lying with you, not on that tiny bed, now lie back and heal”. It sounded like you were chastising a child but it was for his own good, the stubborn man.

At the mention of the name Barnes, his eye twitched slightly before rolling his neck and settling back into the pillows. Even though you would lie with him, you still sat as close as you could, holding his flesh hand which was covered in bandages.

“What did they do to you?”

“You don’t want to know Doll”.

He never hid anything from you, maybe it was for the best that he didn’t give you the details whilst everything was so fresh for him.

“Explain to me what you meant that he was in your mind, so you’re Bucky… but you aren’t?”

“Sort of. I think it got to a point where something snapped in my subconscious and he came out but I mean, it worked. His ruthless aggression was just the push I needed to snap my wrist out of the chains and get me or us- out of there”.

You weren’t sure what to say so he continued his explanation. “I have enough control not to kill them lot out there, but he’s still in here, lingering, ready to kill if needs be”, he pointed at his head.

“Well I’m very glad you didn’t kill poor Sam, he just about shit himself”.

Bucky laughed but then winched, gripping his fractured ribs.

“So what do you want to do now? I think Shuri is coming here”.

“That’s probably for the best, it would be nice not to want to kill my friends. I do ask one thing of you though, don’t leave my side”.

Your heart broke at the sincere note to his tone, tears threatening to spill enough that you had to look away from him.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to make you upset”, Bucky tried to sit up to comfort you but you were quick to push his shoulders back into the pillows, moving to now sit on the edge of his bed, cupping his cheek as he continued his explanation. “I just meant, that if you weren’t here, I can already feel how agitated he is thinking about it. What I’m getting at is for everyone’s safety, don’t leave the Winter Soldier. You’re going to have to just deal with us overbearing pair for a little bit, that’s also why we came straight home rather than a hospital”.

“I think I can deal with that for a little while longer”, finally you were able to grin and truly mean it, leaning in to kiss his lips softly.

It was only a second long but he was already trying to deepen it which caused the pain to flare in his face.

You laughed sitting away from him, “you need to heal first Romeo, both of you do”.

Bucky’s eyes softened, before revealing, “he’s missed you. I’ve missed you”.

“I’ve missed you both too, my overprotective murderer”, you joke, kissing his bandaged hand. At this point, Bucky’s eyes had begun to become heavy, dropping slightly. “Get some rest, I’ll be here when you wake up.

“You better me, otherwise I’m killing everyone in that hallway, Солнышко”.

A/N: Солнышко - little sun. I must admit that I used google to find the translation so apologies if this isn't correct.

#bucky barnes #winter soldier #bucky one shot #bucky x reader #winter soldier x reader #bucky barnes one shot #marvel one shot #winter soldier one shot #mine*

[reineyday]

in a mishanks winter soldier au, i cant decide who id want to be the winter soldier. even just picking based on the reveal scene where buck's goggles fall off to reveal only his eyes (bc the mask stays on), i cant choose!

rambling about the pros for each under the cut lol.

with mihawk, the goggles fall off revealing his piercing yellow eyes, immediately recognizable and standing out from his dark hair and black face mask. ws!hawk could also give us longer-haired mihawk, and his return to himself could include shaving his sideburns and facial hair to the sharp style we all recognize, and maybe even a return to the sword if they still have the winter soldier specialize in guns. maybe extra angst of him losing an arm and then retraining with the sword once he gets back to himself. and ofc shanks as his counterpart would be unequivocally considered a good guy by the general public, and very wholesome and charming. closer to the cap mold than mihawk, in any case, lol.

with shanks, i'd say he seems like the more obvious answer for the winter soldier if we're thinking 1:1 comparison to bucky, since he's got the sunshine personality pre-turning, and he even loses the same arm bucky does. his hair would be signature for the ws in this au, ans his goggles would hide the scars. when they fall off for the reveal, not only would the scars stand out from the face mask, but his eyes would look kind. a different but just as effective sort of jarring from ws!mihawk's eyes in the big reveal.

a ws!shanks, however would make mihawk his cap counterpart, which is more interesting bc mihawk is really not a team captain type. in this au, i imagine the shichibukai would be the acting "hero" team, but they'd function more like the suicide squad and they'd overall be pretty infamous in the public eye, not having great reps as everyone would know they were "villains", too rowdy or troublesome to deal with and so they got offered a gov't contract instead. got frozen in time and the gov't was too unnerved with him to let him go off-leash, and mihawk signs on bc what else is he gonna do? and it became clear that they wouldn't stop bothering him 'til he does.

i suppose story-wise i'd be more tempted to pick ws!shanks bc i find mihawk in this strange position of being equivalent to captain america more interesting to write, but i also just can't let go of the reveal scene with mihawk's eyes standing out. and ws!mihawk could come with the angst of cap!shanks thinking that mihawk is just a rival who tolerates him until he saves shanks's life, and then he finds mihawk again as the winter solider...

but then there's cap!mihawk wandering around listlessly in the future bc his best rival sacrificed himself to save mihawk's life, and for what? but when he finds shanks again (he's only ever known one person with hair that vibrantly red, but that can't be... but then the goggles fall, and those gentle eyes!), shanks doesn't know him and he's nothing like his rival used to be, even if their skillsets are still on par, and cap!hawk has to contend with the fact that he doesn't miss a rival, he misses a friend--maybe even smth more than a friend, which he sees in hindsight shanks, his shanks, his old shanks, knew even if mihawk himself didn't, and now shanks is standing in front of him again and he needs--!

idk. idk!

#rei rambles #mishanks #akataka

[sailorblossoms]

Simon and middle grounds...

Unpacking what Simon calling Baz a creep could mean got me thinking into how much of CO “post-kissing Baz” (and even during) puts Simon into this sort of middle place, where he can’t fully let go of the assumptions and narratives that shaped almost half his life, but he can no longer deny himself what he feels for Baz. When Simon is calling Baz a creep in his own house or something like that and in his head he’s like “I used to mean that but he’s the most familiar thing here and I sleep better listening to him breathing” he’s in a middle ground. Not fully letting go of that nasty little impulse to be antagonistic (and frame Baz in an antagonist light, or at least try to) but also communicating that Baz is home. “He’s a creep and his presence soothes my heart and soul, clearly I hate him.” Ah, Simon. 

His “I’m not even remotely ready to think about me being gay” would naturally extend to “I’m not ready to admit I dated a girl I have no feelings for and unpack what would that mean.” So when he can no longer deny that he felt jealous because of Baz in the woods, he completely avoids thinking about Agatha and settles for “I was jealous over both, I guess.”  (“I guess” “I suppose” is a Simon who’s not at all giving you his true feelings) (I have said it many times: Simon’s romantic jealousy is only about Baz – he has such a strong reaction at the idea of Baz being with someone else – his deal with Agatha is different. He’s not ever concerned about her love life! And he already indirectly admits in WS he was neither in love nor attracted to her when goes “Baz is the only I ever wanted and loved like this” in the context of thinking about romance and sex). 

There’s also Simon being like “he’s not a villain, he’s just a bully” – he’s taking an elevated idea of bad, as in actual evil, and grounding it into a normal level of bad (he’s just a boy) because he’s not ready to admit the narrative he asigned to Baz is 100% wrong... What I just said was pointed out to me by someone else, in one of my first posts in this fandom “the boy has a degree in assholery but I know we don’t genuinely believe Baz was an actual bully. What are we even doing here.” The essence of what I said iirc is that Simon is full of shit and we can’t really think he was a poor helpless victim and Baz his biggest tormentor based on what he says/how he frames their interactions, the Cinderella to Baz’s wicked step-sister ways, or that their dynamic was bully-victim. The point is that they were equals. They went out of their ways to be equals (reflected in Simon thinking of this period of their lives as him being Baz’s match!). I’m remembering that someone wanted to counter this with “the power dynamics of Baz being from a powerful and rich family vs Simon being a poor orphan” which got me thinking...

Simon, Baz and location...

I don’t think that power dynamic really applies inside the bubble of Watford (which is a hell of a bubble). I mean, what the fuck is Baz’s money doing for him there? What does being a part of an old powerful family do for their offspring in the mage’s school other than potentially turning some kids into annoying posh brats during those first couple of years? Other than putting them in disadvantage while in the mage’s school, rather than in a privileged position, when the war gets serious? (Penny talks about boys being taken out of the school as a sign of “shit is about to hit the fan”). Maybe I’m overlooking something, I don’t know. I just don’t see how Baz’s family and money do much (beyond making Simon feel less sophisticated and educated) to alter their dynamic in a way that makes Simon an actual victim/target. Especially given that Simon is the protégé of the guy running the school... (If the mage was a different kind of fucker and didn’t have “endangering Simon” as a hobby, one might wonder whether the mage’s heir wouldn’t have more “power” than the children of disgraced families while in the mage’s school... but that’s a moot point) (and Baz’s “powerful family” is literally just Fiona and Malcolm. Just Fiona if you only think about Pitches by blood. What the fuck kind of influence do they have over that school when Baz is a student? Fiona’s plots include leaving actual shit on the mage’s bed. They’re deeply unserious people!). Hell, one even has to note that Baz being from The Powerful Pitches does jackshit for him in the mage’s school outside of painting a huge target on him whenever the mage remembers who is his mother. It’s a disadvantage for him, one might even say. 

I’m saying all of this because my point is: while in the bubble of Watford, there are many forces driving them to fight each other, building walls between them, giving them tools of perhaps equal destructive force, but they go out of their way (Simon never turns his crazy magic on Baz, Baz never pushes Simon harder than Simon can push back) to stay equal, to be two boys beefing rather than victim vs tormentor (they both break each other’s noses). Baz can be a huge asshole; so can Simon. Baz can be cruel; holy shit, so can Simon!.... Which got me thinking about location beyond Watford.

Baz and Simon don’t ever meet outside of bubble Watford, where the mentioned power dynamic would matter, when they’re “enemies.” That only happens when they have a truce. Simon doesn’t show up in Baz’s house until he feels that Baz and he are on the same side (when he doesn’t think but might feel, even subsconciously, that Baz would shield him from his family... he spends most of his visit in Baz’s bedroom) He’s side-eyed and there’s tension, but he’s relatively fine in that house because he comes as Baz’s visit (until he blows it all up). 

This also makes me think how, when Simon and Baz are together, but not living together, Baz spends most of the time in Simon’s flat. Baz goes to Simon’s “turf” – Simon isn’t “exposed to those dynamics” then, either (nor is Baz living in the place that was once associated with that anymore). 

When Baz and Simon start living together, money or those type of dynamics aren’t a problem, either. They’re beautifully using the money of the dead man responsible for so much of the bad things that happened to them to fund their homosexual bliss. I mean, said man would certainly have a problem with that, but the bitch is dead. Who cares. And by the time Simon visits Baz’s family again, we know he too has a rich family (and a haven in Ruth’s home) so none of that is a concern then, either. 

#snowbaz #simon snow #baz grimm pitch #baz pitch #awtwb #wayward son #snow for christmas #baz x simon #simon x baz #carry on

[afreakingdork]

Miss dork, after looking at the ask where the reader calls ws Donnie their meow meow (I love how we take big intimidating men and just call them meow meows or baby girls) I just imagined reader driving their car (does reader even have one?? I don't think she does since i don't remember it being mentioned) with Donnie being a passenger princess and stuff- idk it would seem almost comical lol

On a unrelated note, do you know any foods that are good to eat in summer that dont make you feel like you ate molten lava or make you die inside? (Please it's 30 degrees inside my house my fan alone can't keep me alive for much longer... Last night it was 32 and the temperature will keep increasing)

-formal anon

Reader does not have a car as they're living the classic lower middle class New York lifestyle. Donnie would be such a passenger prima donna while never outwardly complaining 😂

Cucumbers are supposed to be quite refreshing! I'm a big fan of Korean or Japanese pickled vegetables. That vinegary ice cold burst in your mouth just HITS when it's hot! Then the classic bevvies, though I steer towards clear ones on really hot days (usually iced flavored teas as opposed to say milk tea) and finally ice cream, which I'm not a huge fan of, but will eat on occasion. I hope that helps and you stay cool, my formal friend!

#ask

[woodblxssomcrowned]

Headcanon/Brainstorm :: Shinobi children fighting during the later WS era and early policies of the shinobi academy

Some two hundred years before Hashirama's birth, those under thirteen would rarely be given missions, much less be a part of open combat. If they were brought into the field, their involvement in actual combat was minimal at most, and instead served to help out at the campsites, help care for wounded and such things. They were still trained hard from early childhood, and were expected to be fit for combat by fifteen at the latest, but by then most would have been able to form enough strength and ability to actually keep up reasonably well with the adults.

It was during a period when many clans lost huge numbers of particularly adults and teenagers who were encamped, due to an disease that ravaged the continent for several years, that it became necessary for anyone who could hold a blade to participate. Even ones that were still far from able to use it properly.

Finding and drilling in justifications for it became necessary to cope.

Nobody wanted to send their young and far from able children into combat, but it was needed. And many had lost their families to the disease, and picked up the blade with a sense of duty to what was left of their clan, even very young ones.

The mentality and excuses and justifications, and sending children that were far from actually full-fledged shinobi into combat, ended up sticking around longer than was necessary.

By Hashirama's time, the clans have regained enough of their numbers to no longer be needing these measures, but sending children who have only just mastered basic motor skills has become habit and tradition based on a desperate survival-mode from several generations prior.

Once they took over leadership of their respective clans, both Hashirama and Madara ended up forbidding anyone under fifteen to participate in open combat, regardless of skill-level or previous participation. Some questioned this, stubbornly stuck in mentalities of the past, but most knew better and did not argue with them.

And when the village was founded along with the academy, the goal was to maintain this progress.

In the early days of the academy, Itachi and Kakashi would never have been allowed to graduate at the age of five after just one year, no matter how fast they progressed in the courses. When the academy was founded, it wasn't just about progressing fast and efficiently. It did not matter how much of a genius you were - how much of a prodigy you were - or if you by all estimates was seen as a full fledged shinobi by that age.

The academy was as much about training and preparation for life as a shinobi as it was to serve as a buffer - to prevent children from being pushed into real combat too soon.

In Hashirama's vision, anyone under the age of ten was not supposed be anywhere near even a D-rank mission, and nobody under fifteen could qualify for the rank of chūnin, and during his tenure as Hokage this was largely accepted and applied successfully.

Sadly, as time went on, the requirements surrounding the academy would shift.

This was partially due to trial and error, with initial ideas ending up not being very good and needed to be changed, but also due to the conflicts and wars that would regularly start, taking many lives and prompting a demand to quickly fill up the ranks. The entrance and graduation requirements of the academy, as well as the minimum age for promotion to the chūnin rank, would shift to accommodate that need.

The academy system Hashirama, Madara and Tobirama helped put into place during the founding days would be very different by the time of the 5th Hokage, for better in some ways*, but mostly for worse.

* As happened to Kaname, Rock Lee would not even have been accepted into the academy back in the earliest days of the system due to his inability for Ninjutsu and Genjutsu. The change was suggested by the 2nd Hokage, and put into effect during the early years of the 3rd Hokage.

#;;headcanons #v; main #v; warring states

[glynnisi]

Marvel "Solo" Films- Unpopular Opinion

I don't know if there will be a 3rd solo/stand alone Black Panther film, but so far I'd say the Black Panther movies are the most consistent stand alone films in the MCU.

Black Panther was a cultural phenomenon with one of the best villains in the entire MCU. The cast, the world-building, COSTUMES, music. The only downside was that the 3rd act fight was dark. Wakanda Forever was a meaningful study in grief with perhaps the best teaser trailer EVER. Again, great cast, music, costumes, world-building. HEART. Namor was compelling. A little overstuffed w Iron Heart & Val on top of well-done Talokon. M'Baku stands out in both films. Nakia, Ramonda, Okoye & the Dorae. The tone from one film to the other is CONSISTENT.

Iron Man trilogy- the first Iron Man movie was awesome. Darker, grittier than much of the rest of the MCU. RDJ becoming Tony Stark. Cool suits/tech. Funny. Sad. Awesome. And then... the sequels kind of sucked. Yes, they had cool tech & stunts & RDJ carried them. But Tony pissing the suit? Bird? Fake Mandarin? *Cringe* They were bad.

My beloved, Captain America. Chris Evans did a great job as Steve Rogers. More nuanced & less flashy/quippy than Tony Stark, but great. CATFA was a sweet little comics movie w vintage vibe. Red Skull is a campy villain done as well as they could. Pretty good movie, not groundbreaking. BUT THEN- Captain America the Winter Soldier happened. It made Cap a badass. Fight scenes were AMAZING. Elevator scene! Cap & WS in the streets & at the end! Cap vs Quinjet! Nick Fury car chase. Black Widow badassery. Winter Soldier was scary & Hydra menacing. A tight, well-directed, well-written, well-edited, overall great FILM. Best of the MCU. PEAK Steve Rogers characterization. Yes. LOVED CATWS. So, then, Marvel said... "fuck Steve Rogers and his fans" (forever bitter & fuck you too Marvel). "RDJ's aging out & he makes $$$$. Let's give him Cap's 3rd film cuz BatmanVSuperman is coming & we're scared." IF you look at CACW as a Cap film, then Tony would be the villain. He's the 3rd act fight, the other face on the poster, the one trying to kill Steve. But, it's NOT a Cap film because Marvel couldn't suck RDJ off enough & could never nuance Tony's lack of emotional control as villainous. Nope. They made him Wooby crying out for his Mama. Waah! It's Avengers 2.5. It introduces Spiderman & Black Panther. It features every Avenger. It starts w Tony's early life trauma/loss of his parents/intro of his loving mom. (NO Sarah Rogers in Cap3, tho.) Then his guilt over lying & making Ultron & nearly ending the world. The longer end scene is Tony tending to his BF's injuries & sulking over Steve's apology. THEN we get a glimpse of Steve rescuing his friends from The Raft. Steve BARELY had more screen time than Tony in supposed Cap3. So, it's not a stand alone film. Cap fans were robbed.

The Thor films? Well. Uneven is an understatement. 1st Thor is kind of like the first Cap movie. Different tone. Deals well with campy comic elements. Branagh directed it as Shakespearean dramedy in space. Asgard is beautiful. Movie was made for the female gaze (like Mr. Hemsworth) and is a female fan fave. Thor the Dark World... is a dull follow-up. Malekith is the dullest villain ever. Dark Elves are so generic looking it's sad. If they'd been done differently, it could've had real menace. Lots of people are afraid of the dark, after all. Instead, Dark World is the most panned of all early Marvel films. Ragnarok is its polar opposite. Bright, colorful, comic-beautiful, but too funny. There's zero gravity to anything. Asgard explodes? Time for another joke. It's a fave, especially male fans. Thor is more badass in it, too. Loki is great. The faux tease of World War Hulk had fanboys delirious. And then there was Love & Thunder. Oh, L&T. Female fans were so excited for Mighty Thor/Jane Foster. Male fans were delirious that Gorr was coming & being played by Christian Bale. And, it's a huge flop. Again, comics beautiful. Too quippy, Taika. Not dark enough/wasted Gorr. Honestly, I enjoyed the kids/kiddishness because we took our son & he loved all that.

AntMan? The first was well done. Offbeat. Paul Rudd is CHARMING. Luis was the best thing in it. Scott's love for his daughter gave it HEART. Funny & fun. Great tone, though villain was meh. AntMan & the Wasp? Less fun. In big part that's because there were cast members phoning it in. Fishburne doesn't realize he was in it, FFS. Positive fam dynamic was too cheesily played. Meh. Then, Quantumania. Wait that may be the biggest flop of all MCU now. No stakes. No LUIS??? Exposition that something's coming? Lots of "care about these quirky characters you just met" and "listen... we're telling you Kang is bad... what? why should we show you?" Sigh. And... visuals were murky when the Quantum Realm should be vivid and sharp and vibrant and the most important element of the film.

Marvel is lucky so many fans have good imaginations and make their characters better than they did.

#Marvel stand alone films #Gimme Cap3 you jerks

[hazel-wand]

for the WIP ask meme: Memories & Untitled A/B/O fic

For the WIP Ask Meme (please feel free to send an ask - I’m enjoying going through old fic and it’s nice to share bits)

Memories is probably not going to get written. It’s also one of those fics where I’m not even sure if the idea for it is mine or whether I read it somewhere (I’m sure the idea has been written before). It was going to be a post CACW Wakanda fic, where Steve visits Bucky shortly after he wakes up. Steve is being ridiculously careful of Bucky - doesn’t want to stall his recovery or bring up trauma. Bucky, meanwhile, has most of his memories back, but fantasy and memory have blurred in his mind, so he’s not completely sure what’s true or not. He loved Steve before the war, and thinks they were in a relationship because he has so many ‘memories’ of kissing Steve, telling him he loves him etc (Steve erroneously confirms this in a fit of miscommunication). So when Steve tells Bucky that he isn’t expecting - doesn’t want - things to go back to how they were before (because Steve isn’t expecting him to be the Bucky from 1938 or 1944), Bucky takes it to mean that Steve no longer wants a romantic relationship with him. Bucky figures it out when he mentions Steve coming to rescue him in the early WS days and realises that of course Steve never did, it’s just that newly-captured Bucky had waited and hoped and imagined so much that when Shuri restored his memories, she’d restored Bucky’s fantasies of Steve as fact rather than fiction.

The untitled A/B/O fic is again inspired by a post someone made somewhere which said that alphas would be like the ‘mom friend’ who always has snacks. I liked the idea of a pre-serum Alpha! Steve who needs to be needed by his friends - needs to be able to take care of them/feed them, except that none of them really need him (like Sam is a good buddy but is a level-headed Beta who doesn’t need to be fussed over; Natasha allows Steve to put her back together after a mission goes south, but then she’s off on her own again). So Steve uses his small-for-an-Alpha size to help people get over Alpha-related trauma/abuse, because he smells like an Alpha but is much less physically threatening. Meanwhile Bucky is a Winter Soldier-sized Omega whose war experience has left him down an arm and with a phobia of Alphas.

Here’s their first meeting:

“Meeeeoooow!”

Bucky pulls his pillow further over his ears and tries to escape back into sleep.

“Meeeeeeooooooowww!”

He rolls over and fumbles for his phone. 9:15. Fuck.

Alpine, his white-furred, blue-eyed menace of a roommate continues singing the song of her people outside the bedroom door until Bucky can’t take it anymore and, grumbling to himself - and her, he staggers out of bed and heads to the kitchen in search of cat food and coffee. In that order.

Alpine weaves around his ankles as he fills up her bowl. His dad had suggested one of those feeding machines, which would feed her at a set time, but Bucky had said no. Feeding Alpine would get him up on time and get him home on time. He’d thought it would be good for him. It is good for him, he supposes, as it means he’s up and awake and won’t be late for the VA today, even though he hadn’t fallen asleep until almost 5 in the morning. He grimaces at the first bitter sip of instant coffee. He needs to buy milk.

Bucky stops at three bodegas before finding one that doesn’t smell too badly of Alpha on his fourth attempt. He keeps his nose pressed into his scarf and doesn’t dare to shop for longer than it takes to grab the milk and a new bag of cat food (he has enough cat food, but the thought of running out and failing Alpine terrifies him, so he makes sure to buy some every time he shops). By the time he gets outside his face is hot and his breath is coming too quick. He hurries home to drop off the shopping, and then it’s time to head to the VA.

His group session at the VA is fine, really it is. Bucky’s always been the type to stand up and say something when no one else will, and while he can’t say he loves talking about his experiences in front of a bunch of Beta and Omega semi-strangers, he feels that at least he’s done what he set out to do once the session is over. It’s hot in the room, even with the windows open, and no matter how generous they all are with the scent dampeners, a group of nervous veterans in a small room on a warm day creates quite a cocktail of scent after an hour or so. Bucky keeps his eyes on Sam, the Beta who leads the group, and who is the only one who doesn’t put on a scent dampener for the session. He broadcasts steady Beta calm. For all that going to group leaves Bucky feeling raw and confronted, the goodness of Sam’s scent is something he looks forward to each week.

It’s only at the end, when the door opens and new air rushes in, that Bucky realises how much distress has still filtered through the air of the meeting room. He stays behind while the others file out, ostensibly to talk to Sam about some of the therapy programmes the VA offers, and mostly so that he can spend a few moments collecting himself under the influence of Sam’s scent, before he heads back to the world.

“Art therapy’s really helped some people,” Sam’s saying. “The main guy who does it is an Alpha, but there’s an Omega who sometimes offers a watercolour class - let me see when she’s running it …” He turns and clicks through some screens on the ancient desktop computer in the corner of the room.

Bucky looks out the open door, watching the rest of the group walk off. Some are walking hunched over, their heads down, while others are chatting as they go, maybe planning on getting a coffee together. A few feet away there’s a large alcove in the hall, and a small guy is hanging up some pictures in it. Bucky’s eyes drift over the art - a turbulent seascape and a canvas filled with burnt orange and red swirls of colour which makes Bucky’s stomach ache - and fix on the man who is currently using a spirit level to check that they’re hanging straight. He’s small, with floppy blond hair that looks soft, even from this distance. He moves efficiently: not hurrying, but working decisively and neatly. It’s soothing to watch.

Or at least it is until the last of the group members filter past him, and Bucky catches the first hint of the man’s scent. Bucky’s heart beats sickly out of time.

Alpha.

The man, small as he is, has the scent of an Alpha, unmistakable even through the distance between them and the dampeners he’s presumably wearing. Too late, Bucky notices the yellow triangle set up saying ‘Alpha at work.’

“Yeah, so Majorie’s not doing watercolours again until after Christmas, but there’s an adaptive knitting class,” Sam says, walking towards Bucky, who is still standing frozen in the doorway, his heart going rabbit fast and his eyes fixed on the Alpha.

Sam stops behind Bucky and swears softly.

As though he’s heard, the Alpha turns towards them, both of them standing in the still-open doorway. Bucky tries to remind himself that he’s safe, he’s home, that the Alpha means him no harm. He tries to focus on Sam’s steady scent, but all he can smell is his own fear, heavy and cloying, a sour taste in his mouth, and beyond that the sharp spikes of Alpha coming from the stranger in the hallway.

The stranger’s face might look concerned, but Bucky can’t really tell as his vision is swirling and clouding, the pressure in his head causing black spots behind his eyes. His throat is seized, his lungs stilled, stifled by his own ridiculous terror.

The stranger moves towards them.

“Steve!” Sam’s shout sounds far away, even though he’s standing right by Bucky. “You can’t be here.”

The stranger’s eyes widen. He looks at Bucky and Sam, then down at himself, and the Alpha scent suddenly explodes around them under a crest of the man’s emotion.

“Shit!” the man says. Even Bucky’s swimming vision can pinpoint the moment the man realises what’s happening and pulls himself back (the Alpha scent - shame and pain - recedes a little). The Alpha starts speeding back down the hall.

Bucky hears Sam’s inhale beside him, although he’s too embarrassed right now to look at him. His heart starts to slow and the pressure in his head dissipates, chased off by the safe, steady, calm that Sam is pushing out towards him.

Bucky screws his eyes tight shut and tries to will down the tears that prickle behind his eyelids. As a child he cried easily, much to his little sisters’ teasing and his dad’s discomfort. Since choosing to join the army, he’s tried to force the emotions back. It’s too easy to be seen as a hysterical Omega if he cries, and he’s not. He’s not.

Bucky shakes as he feels himself come back. “Fuck,” he says. His voice is breath-soft and shivery. “I’m so sorry.” He forces himself to look at Sam, standing still at Bucky’s side, his eyes fixed on the hallway where the strange Alpha had run.

Straight away, Sam turns to him, his brown eyes warm and concerned. “Nothing for you to apologise for, James,” he says kindly. “That was in no way your fault.” Sam’s eyes flick back down the empty corridor. “I’m not sure why he was there, but he shouldn’t have been. This is your space, and you need to feel safe here.”

“It’s okay,” Bucky says, trying to shrug and failing. He suddenly hopes the little Alpha won’t get into trouble for being too close to a group that was for Betas and Omegas only. After all, he wasn’t one of the Alphas who had … - he wrests his mind from that train of thought.

“It’s not okay, and it shouldn’t have happened,” Sam repeats. He shifts his weight on the balls of his feet. “I’ll talk to Steve, make sure it won’t happen again. How are you doing, man? Can I - do you need …? Sam offers Bucky his wrist, underside up.

Bucky’s seized by the desire to grasp Sam’s wrist, pull it to his face and take a deep breath of that calming, soothing scent. He doesn’t get close enough to scent many people, and few offer the same comfort that Sam does, even though he’s only known him a short time, and it’s not like Bucky’s exactly been himself in that time either. He reaches out a finger, lightly touches the soft skin of Sam’s wrist, then pushes it back down with the same finger. He knows Sam wouldn’t think he was weak for taking some comfort, but Bucky’s been called it enough times in his life to not let himself.

“You good, James?” Sam asks, not letting any awkwardness colour his tone or scent. “You want to stay here for a few minutes, get your breath? I can look for a Be-Meg class that isn’t knitting?”

Bucky makes himself smile. He used to be good at this, he reminds himself. “Nah,” he says, forcing his voice to sound strong and casual. “I’m good. Just gonna head off.”

Sam gives him an easy smile which doesn’t reach his scent. “Sure thing,” he says. “I’ll walk you out.”

Outside, it is a relief to be swathed in the anonymity of smells that is Brooklyn on an unseasonably warm October day. Bucky says goodbye to Sam and pulls his bandana around his chin just in case, but outside it’s unusual to pick out any one particular scent, unless it’s someone you know well. Bucky walks almost everywhere these days: it’s the best way to be around people without having to be around them.

As he skirts the building, he catches sight of Sam standing over a small figure slumped against a wall. He sees the mop of blond hair, and recognises the Alpha from the hallways. Outside, and from this distance, he can’t smell anything from the man, but he finds himself standing still and watching. The Alpha has his head in his hands; his posture broadcasts distress and shame. Bucky feels a pang. Yes, the guy had scared the shit out of him, but that’s Bucky’s problem, not his. The little Alpha shouldn’t have been in that hallway during a Be-Meg group, but it’s not as though he’s built like a stereotypical Alpha - all power and muscle. Poor guy can’t be used to scaring people. Sometimes, Bucky wishes he could get angry at people. It would be easier if he could just blame the Alpha and be done with it, rather than feeling sorry for him.

Bucky’s not even surprised when it starts to rain as he’s halfway home. Not only did it take a cat to get him out of bed, an hour and a half to find a place he could buy milk, a panic attack at a tiny Alpha’s scent and a good drenching round off his day. He keeps coming back to the look on the guy’s face - the scent of the Alpha’s shame that Bucky could smell alongside his own fear, and the Alpha’s defeated pose as he waited - for Sam? - outside the VA, downwind from the doorway so that Bucky wouldn’t be able to smell him.

Bucky sighs. The kicker was that this isn’t a bad day. Not really. It’s just another day in his boring, lonely, fucked-up life. And isn’t that just the worst part of all?

#stucky #bucky barnes #steve rogers #hazel writes fic #wip excerpt #wip

[logicalstansadvice]

Yeah…the person who mentioned that he sounded like he was giving Bucky up. He literally said once that “he was dead”….

He can’t talk about stuff that hasn’t been announced yet. Especially Marvel stuff. I still think he’s going to be in Captain America 4. We haven’t even met the White Wolf yet.

Anon #2: I'm pretty sure the WS will be in the Thunderbolts. Just because he was all heroic at the end of the Falcon and the Winter Soldier doesn't mean he truly feels like a hero. Plus it's now Captain America and the Winter Soldier... he never changed. Maybe he has an identity crisis and becomes an Anti-Hero? It would be a better arc then the half assed one they gave him in the series and could lead him to take on his White Wolf persona at the end of it all. It also explains why he's so quiet on the Bucky front, he always gets tight lipped when he knows something, he plays off like he's oblivious then we find out he's known stuff for months. For an actor, Seb can't lie for shit. I'm here for it, i hope it happens 😁

Anon #3: Bucky is back to being the Winter Soldier and working with other vilains?? What happened to his whole redemption arc in FATWS and him saying he is no longer the WS? // The Thunderbolts started as villains who pretended to be heroes but over time morphed into a team of antiheroes—people working for the govt in gray areas that “regular” heroes wouldn’t. They were started by Thunderbolt Ross (played by William Hurt in the MCU) but he’s no longer with us, plus they seem to have set up Val (Julia Louise Dreyfuss) to play that role anyway. She’s already recruited John Walker and Yelena. I can see Zemo in the Thunderbolts as well (and he led them for a time in the comics). I can’t see Bucky wanting to work for the govt, much less be on the same team as Walker and Zemo (!) but oh man, it would be sooooo entertaining. Imagine the banter!!! 😂

Anon #4: What happened to his whole redemption arc in FATWS and him saying he is no longer the WS? istg it’s like Marvel just doesn’t know what to do with this character // Except we don't know the plot yet? His redemption arc could very well continue in Thunderbolts. They're more like reformed villains than straight up villains, so I can totally see Bucky leading them as a guide towards redemption. Also, Kari Skogland said there was more to come in terms of the Winter Soldier name when asked why it didn't change by the end of TFATWS. Perhaps he will reclaim the Winter Soldier title by turning it into something good.

Anon #5: "I still think from the way Seb talks, like that last one with Aniston, Bucky’s days are over. Notice that he doesn’t seem to have more interest than he used to" Anon, he's not going to act all excited. Like Neve Campbell, Seb knows his worth now, and he's not going to turn down, for example, shooting a rom-com with JA or MR next summer so he can have another half-assed role as plot-point Bucky. If they give him an actual star turn as Bucky, pretty sure he'd be happy to do it.

Anon #6: Bucky doesn't make sense in the Thunderbolts because he's no longer a villain. He's a hero, it makes no sense. I don't think he's going to be in it. // there is a storyline where all the villains actually reform and do good deeds. Maybe they're gonna write the script based on that? In an article from Deadline apparently several actors already in the MCU have been contacted about the movie to keep their schedules clear for next summer.

Anon #7: And if he does know something by now (which I suppose he does), he won't give anything away until Marvel makes their official announcements. // Yep. Also, the Deadline article says that Marvel is already talking to some of the MCU actors to make sure they'll be free to shoot Thunderbolts next summer, so if Bucky is in it they certainly have already reached out to Seb, considering he must be getting a lot of offers right now because of all the attention he's been getting.

Anon 3...the banter would be A-1 😂!

One ask got swallowed up in the copy/paste, the one with Bucky grumbling about "the kids", sorry! But yes anon, that would extremely funny.

Remember the scene at lunch with Yori? "Wow, so young." 🤣

💄

#logical stans advice #logicalstansadvice #asks answered

[bestsnow-white]

"Wait what is this?" Emma asked, frantically looking around the room. "Where's all my stuff? " She reluctantly climbed up on the changing table, before quickly climbing down and squatting to do her business , "And what is that?" the blonde asked, pointing at a pink plastic chair in the corner (though she had an idea, it looked similar to the potty chair Neal used).

(Regina, on phone): " Just wanted to check in. Henry's working on a science project right now, Robin and Roland are outside, and I've got one who's supposed to be taking her nap right now" Regina yelled in the background. "Zelena, what are you doing up? Did you need to go potty?"

"This Emma is your new room your going to be wearing diapers and pull ups and we'll get you potty trained so that's all you need to know for now little girl." Snow-White began to explain. "Relax baby your stuff is in storage you'll get it all back when you can prove to mommy that you're a big girl," Snow awnsered hwr daughter's question. " Emma honey are you piipin6 your pants right now?" Snow-White knew the answer but she wants to get confirmation from her daughter. "That going to be your potty chair but seeing that you can't tell we won't be using the potty chair till you're done. While Emma was doing her business Snow wad gathering the supplies for het daughter.

(David on phone): Hello Regina that's nice if you and my thank you for checking in that's amazing I can't wait to see his science project. Snow-White is with Emma. Emma had another accident and Snow is cleaning our baby. I know how that is being outside and I see I bet she's being a little difficult today isn't she."

"Yes mummy I need the potty," Zelena lied she wS already using her diaper she just wanted to play a bit longer and thought she could sneak past her mommy.

[indigo474]

63222

Another month is here. Welcome June. Time is going by at warp speed. I am STILL not feeling good. Its not to the point where i want to go to the Dr. Monday I had off from work and i laid around all day and ate good food and did nothing. It felt very indulgent. I havent done that in a while. I use to fel guilty for doing nothing. I was programmed to think my worth was in how much i could get done in a day- I could never do enough and therefor was never worth anything. THose feelings did creep in on Monday- i tell myself it is ok to rest- because it is. I recently came across information regarding how abusive the silent treatment is.. and why people do it. Out of everything, being ignored hurt my soul the most. I actually started to think i was invisible. there was so much i didnt know.

I am once again going to try this online dating thing. I might have a date Saturday. Here's the thing though- I'm not excited. I wish i was but im not and i dont know if that normal or if there is something wrong with me. I wonder if i will ever be excited at the prospect of dating- also im thinking i would rather go to the park and run rather than meet this dude. I swear the longer i am single the harder it is going to be for me to meet someone.

I went out with Marci this week for dinner- I enjoy our dinners and i am thankful to have her in my life- i asked the universe to send me a mother figure and Marci asked me to hang with her. My Mom has been texting me the usual I love you- I want to text back - why don't you act like it? I must trigger something inside her. She just can't be kind to me. She's also not kind to herself. She let me know she has " suspicious nodules" on her lungs and will find out more information in 2 weeks- thanks for letting me know.

So lots going on and nothing going on. Ohh Last weekend i spent a few hours with Sharon- after i ghosted her for a week because i wasn't feeling well- so i guess that makes it 2 weeks since I felt 100%- I realized why im friends with her. She doesnt ask me t be anyone besides who i am. she doesnt hold shit against me. she doesn't say i need to change.. When i was hanging out with Steph she would say Im going to change you.. that implies there is something wrong with me as i am. I don't need someone to change me. Honestly- Steph ws controlling and i guess she thought she could change me.. she wanted me to be more like her.. Anyway- ive noticed i am becoming less reactive to situations and things i use to react to. There are times I feel like the old me is dead.. i killed her. this is both liberating and scary as hell.. I miss writing as i have not done it all week. I am emotional right now- feelings feelings feelings- i think people are afraid to feel- afraid to heal- hardest thing i have even done and also the most rewarding.. hoping for a good Friday at work- I am enjoying what I am learning and feel grateful for the opportunity- this also brings up feelings- where I could be had i left x sooner.. i cant let myself think like that. i need to trust that all happens when it is suppose to and i am where i am meant to be and my best days are ahead of me... the end.

[marquainequeen]

Luisa and her poor hot chocolate

#Encanto memes #fanart #disney encanto #encanto fanart #encanto #luisa madrigal #luisa my beloved #Mirabel madrigal #Abuela madrigal #Madrigal family #Encanto madrigal #What other Encanto tags #Encanto luisa #Encanto mirabel #Encanto abuela #b99 quotes #b99 incorrect quotes #encanto incorrect quotes #Incorrect quotes #This ws supposed to be longer #Abuela was gonna be asking people who stole arepas in the kitchen #And mirabel was gonna go no way anyone here is a thief #And she'd narrate how she knows everyone #And the reveal about Bruno being the thief #Something about camilo trying to steal arepas but his dad keeps blocking him because he TOO is trying to steal arepas #Madrigal hijinks #what else am i supposed to tag?

[snzical]

can i be so honest. and i'm sorry if this ends with me ruining some people's fun. i love fun i don't want to destroy that. but well i am growing a tad weary of the biblically accurate angel nonsense...

#.txt #its just well im sorry but its just that ive heard too much of it now and im tired of it i suppose... #and maybe its tacky of me but i sort of like the pretty people with pretty wings and nothing scary. maybe thats passe #but its no longer niche or cool you know maybe it ws niche knowledge at some point and maybe it still feels niche to you because anything #you dont get to hear at church thats about the bible its like oh my goodness how scandalous!!! but everybody who read dantes inferno knows #about these guys although how many of you have actually sat down and read dantes inferno at all really and how many of you just watched the #osp video on it and called it a day... be honest. #anyways i dont know i know we all like our eldritch horrors and our impossible to percieve beasts and what have you but honestly i just #think we all need to stop acting like this is such niche quirky knowledge because anyone whos ever done even a little googling knows it #like girls im sure we can find this on the wikipedias... #this is a silly grievance to have im sure and im not really that mad its just that sometimes well i get a teeny bit annoyed #about the whole thing!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[goldkirk]

.

#okay this has never happened to me #befpre when i dissociated it was feeling completely spaced out #and/or like i was off kilter and/or that the world was kinda fake or more like a thing happening in front lf me #but for a few daus now ive just been unable to feel emotions really at all except for a couple bits of crying during yoga and a spurt of #bad feeling super restless bad energy earleir today that made me run to get it out #but i ws doing yoga again trying to see if it could help tonight and i dodn’t get anywhere except a new realization that i am constantly #closing my eyes during it and disconnecting from anything but the instructions and my balance or whatever #and so i started truing to keep my eyes open more and i realized it’s not that im divorcing from my body i do feel myseld physically here #and i’m in control and i can see myself move and be like yep i’m moving #but i do not feel like im seeing MYSELF??? i feel like my whole body should be smaller like a kid #like i’m supposed to be younger but i have too big hands and longer legs and i’m taller and ugh #idk #it’s just #weird and i don’t know how to fix any of this #whatever episode i’m having i just want to snap out of it!!!!!! #shh katie #dissociation

[scientifically-strange]

After Danny joined the avengers how would his meeting with Bucky go ? Would he be Bucky or the WS ?

Danny was excited to say the least.

He was an official member of the Avengers at the ripe old age of eighteen.

He had already met a few members here and there while on patrols. He's had a conversation with Iron Man, and at one point Captain America tried to be patriotic in his general direction. He had accidentally stumbled in a bust happening, and had met Natasha and Clint in the frenzy. And Spider-Man was one of his besties, now.

He had been given the tour earlier in the day, but it was different when all the lights were off. He's about 80% sure he's been down this hallway three times now.

He just needed to find the kitchen, make some cocoa to calm his nerves, and he's be on his merry way, but noooo. He had to get himself fucking lost.

After another ten minutes he finally found what he was looking for. He gave a sigh of relief, as he turned on the kitchen lights.

Now, he had been sure he's met all of the Avengers. He's seen them all over the news, and most of them at this point had actually come up to him and introduced themselves.

But the exhausted brick shithouse sitting at the bar wasn't in his rolodex.

The man looked at him tiredly, and raised an eyebrow when Danny didn't move a muscle. He had on a long sleeve shirt but he could see a sliver of metal peaking through.

"Take a picture, I'm sure it'll last longer," he said. He had the same Brooklyn drawl that Steve did when he wasn't paying attention to the deliberate way he spoke.

"Uh, hi," Danny said, finally willing his feet to move. "I'm Danny. Uh, hero name Phantom. And you are?"

The stranger just stared at him silently. Danny felt like he was back under the microscope. Or maybe it was because that's what his nightmares had been about. He couldn't tell.

"Right," Danny said after a silence that lasted a little to long. He didn't do well with tense silence. He needed some way to fill it. "I'm gonna make some cocoa. Do you want some?"

The man's head tilted to the side ever so slightly, before he gave a small shrug and nodded.

Danny had no idea if he was supposed to be here or not, but none of the alarms were going off, so Danny figured it was more or less okay. None of his personal alarm bells were going off, so it couldn't be that bad, right?

Danny made quick work of the mugs, topping them with whipped cream and this fancy chocolate drizzle that Natasha liked to keep around. If she asked about it in the morning he'd blame Tony.

Danny leaned on the other side of the counter and took a sip as he passed the other mug to the stranger in front of him.

"Thanks," he said. "It's Bucky, by the way."

Danny's heard that name before. He couldn't quite place it, not with how his brain was still trying to wind down from his nightmares, but he knew the name was associated with the general concept of good, so he just nodded and took another sip.

"You the new recruit?" Bucky asked. Danny nodded and set his mug down, letting it's warmth seep into his permanently cold hands.

"Yeah. I blew in from Amity."

"What made you move to the big city?"

It was a normal question. He was getting to know Danny. So why did it make him tremble? Why did it make his chest clench with an unbearable anxiety? Was it the ghosts? Or maybe it was when he had been shot out of the sky and-

"I just needed a change of pace," he says, oddly proud for the way his voice doesn't shake. "You know how small hick towns are."

"Sounds unbearable," Bucky says. He's looking Danny over, calculating, but doesn't say anything more than that. He takes a sip of his cocoa, and Danny can't help but snort at the whipped cream mustache it gives the older man.

It's quickly wiped away, and the silence settles once again. It's not uncomfortable, necessarily, but there's still a small obligation in the back of Danny's head to fill the silence. After a few minutes of debating what he should break it with, Bucky does the job for him.

"For nightmares Bruce likes to keep a collection of teas in the cabinet above the fridge."

Danny just blinks at him, mug halfway to his mouth. He sets it down, eyebrows furrowed. "How did you know?"

"Because that's why I'm up. And if you want someone to talk to, Sam has a pretty good ear on him."

That's what Steve had told him. He didn't know how he felt about using his teammate, his new friend, as a therapist, even if that was his occupation. But the white figures and glints of metal under harsh lighting is a permanent fixture when Danny closes his eyes. It would be nice to go back to stars and constellations and rocket ships.

"Thanks," he tells Bucky. "I'll keep that in mind. It's just-it's a big change. And I'm still trying to get over what happened, but it's...Hard, I guess."

"What happened, if you don't mind me asking?"

Danny chewed at his bottom lip and contemplated. He didn't want to be the odd one out on his first night, but he couldn't keep pushing it down either. He needed to talk to somebody about it. And, well, Bucky looked like he understood.

"Have you..." God, why was it so hard to even say their name? "Have you ever heard of the Guys in White?"

Bucky nods slowly, taking a deliberate sip to gather his thoughts. "They're an old branch of Hydra that specializes in the supernatural, though not a lot of people take them seriously."

"Yeah, I didn't either for a long time. Maybe that's why they finally caught up to me."

And so Danny talked, and Bucky listened. He didn't go into detail about how it felt to have gloved hands rummaging around his insides, or how the smell of bleach and antiseptic send him into a panic attack. He doesn't talk about the way the muzzle bit into the bridge of his nose, or how the restraints on his wrists had been too tights when he had been strapped down to that table. But he tells Bucky enough to where he kind of gets the idea of what happened, and in turn Bucky tells him what happened to him.

And in the morning they will act like nothing happened. Danny will kick himself around for not realizing who Bucky was sooner, considering his extensive comic book collection. But the next evening, and many after, they meet in the kitchen and share stories and tips on how to deal with their respective demons.

The weight in Danny's chest gets lighter, the panic less inhibitive, and in turn Bucky gets another punk to look after. He gets somebody who understand him, who needs him to be more than just a mindless killer.

And if the Avengers find them passed out on the couch together with the Lord of the Rings credits playing on the TV, well, none of them say anything about it.

Though, Natasha does have a few new photos for her scrapbook.

----

Give me big brother bucky or give me death

#danny phantom #danny fenton #avengers #bucky barnes #winter soldier #ask #asks open #bucky

[buckyshusband0]

WIPS

Here are some WIPS you (should) be expecting !! 

Dear, Bucky Barnes (B.Barnes) | Fake Dating

Summary: Bucky has been invited to his sisters’ wedding and nothing can possibly be wrong with that. Right? No, Bucky’s parents are expecting him to have a date and the only person he can truly ask is the person he hates.. you.

Painful Overdose (S.Stan)

Summary: After returning from rehab, you are greeted with the open arms of your boyfriend, Sebastian Stan. When an argument leads you to take drugs again, how will Sebastian handle seeing you harm yourself from drug use?

Love Bites (Vampire!B.Barnes) 

Summary: Bucky is one of the 6 original vampires who have been around for over 1,000 years. Every 600 years, there’s a doppelganger of yourself who Bucky always tries to find. He sets his eyes on a male who works at the bar and needs his touch. But most importantly his taste.

The Manny (C.Evans) 

Summary: After having to work for hours constantly, Chris and his wife decide to hire a manny to watch over their kid. That was until Chris started to fall for his kids’ manny. How will this affect his marriage? 

Ready To Comply (WS)  

Summary: Bucky Barnes, A.K.A, the Winter Soldier is assigned to carry intel of a file you were accused of having. He so happens has to go undercover and pretend to be someone he’s not. What happens when Bucky falls in love with his mission he was supposed to kill?

My Sugar Baby (Sugar Daddy!S.Rogers) 

Summary: You agreed to be his sugar baby when you and Steve agreed to have no strings attached in this relationship. Simple as it sounds, right? It would be if you weren't in love with Steve Rogers, your sugar daddy.

Dangerous Desires (Biker!A.Levinson) 

Summary: Ari Levinson, the land's most feared biker, has fallen in love. He was smitten by you. The biker has a bad boy image to keep, but what happens when Ari can no longer control his dangerous feelings for you? At a run-down bar, the lead singer.

Delicate Pleasures (Neighbor!B.Barnes) 

Summary: When Sam had told Bucky about the amazing wonders of the internet, he didn’t expect to find something so pleasurable. Bucky Barnes so happens to come across your mature content, but there’s one problem. You’re his next-door neighbor...

Hopeless Revenge (B.Barnes) 

Summary: Bucky Barnes, ex-assassin, has finally moved on from the once traumatic life he was once in. As a child, you had to witness your sister get murdered by the masked man. Who apparently, you are sent to kill now.

Judgmental Lustful Nights (L.Bodecker) 

Summary: It's terrible to have a crush on your father's best friend, but it's not wrong when the crush is on Lee Bodecker. Lee has suspicions about your crush and is well aware of your desires. He wants to make your wishes come true by doing something he won't regret...

#bucky barnes x male reader #sebastian stan x male reader #johnny storm x male reader #chris evans x male reader #stucky x male reader