#WITHOUT KILLING ANYONE

[themthistles]

whenever i see another tiktok girlie talking about how she wishes to have been a fangirl in 2010s i feel like a seasoned veteran overhearing a foolish youngin boasting about wanting to go to war for glory and adventure. you naive little idiot. you know nothing. you understand nothing. you weren't there in the trenches. i have seen things, terrible things. i cannot plug in my phone charger at night without being plagued by the visions of Him

#you wouldn't be able to keep calm and carry on through these years #you can't even say kill without censoring it in a million ways #2010s were a bloodbath be glad you were a baby at the time and didn't witness it #on another subject anyone remember that short period of time when everyone was into moustaches for some reason?? #what the fuck was that about

[moonlightdancer26]

Snape haters: How do people even like Snape?

Also Snape:

“Yes, it is easy to see that nearly six years of magical education have not been wasted on you, Potter. Ghosts are transparent.”

*****

“Would you like me to do it now?” asked Snape, his voice heavy with irony. “Or would you like a few moments to compose an epitaph?”

*****

“I was just showing Harry my grindylow,” said Lupin pleasantly, pointing at the tank.

“Fascinating,” said Snape, without looking at it.

*****

As Harry raised himself into a sitting position, his head still swimming from its last contact with the ground, he saw Snape running as hard as he could, the enormous beast [Buckbeak] flapping behind him and screeching as Harry had never heard him screech —

. . . Snape had managed to Disapparate just beyond the school’s boundaries.

*****

Snape gave her [Umbridge] an ironic bow and turned to leave.

*****

“The mind is a complex and many-layered thing, Potter — or at least, most minds are.” He smirked.

*****

“Potter, when I want nonsense shouted at me I shall give you a Babbling Beverage. And Crabbe, loosen your hold a little, if Longbottom suffocates it will mean a lot of tedious paperwork, and I am afraid I shall have to mention it on your reference if ever you apply for a job.”

#what if i told you snape had that dawg in him #snape outrunning a hippogriff has to be the most iconic thing anyone has ever done #like it’s actually insane how jkr expected us to just get over that #like ma’am #he just #outran #a HIPPOGRIFF #without even harming it #keep in mind that he just killed the only person who knew of his loyalties and was a 36 year old guy #he does all this crazy shit with such casuality #anyway i’ll never move on from that bc my fave just casually outran a hippogriff???? what has YOUR fave achieved in life?? #he is such a little shit i love him sm #severus snape #pro snape #pro severus snape #snape #harry potter #hp #shitpost

[a-dauntless-daffodil]

imaging early charlie's struggles with newly not-as-much-of-a-murderer vaggie like-

Charlie: (shows of a doodle of vaggie) "This is you!"

Vaggie: "Okay?" (she drew FANART of me???)

Charlie: "And this red color-" (points to doodle) "-is you anger level."

Vaggie: "....all of me is in red."

Charlie: (contemplative) "Yes. It's unusually high, for someone of your size."

Vaggie: "Look. If this is about that demon from yesterday-"

Charlie: "It's about that demon from today."

Vaggie: "What, her? She bumped into you! On purpose!! She basically walked herself right onto my spear-"

Charlie: "You threw it at her head from across store!"

Vaggie: "And if it wasn't for her stupid, perfectly-timed sneeze-"

Charlie: "You're lucky she sneezed right then- she was giving you weird looks the whole time I was yanking the spear outta the wall and dragging you away!!"

Vaggie: "I could've taken her."

Charlie: "She was an overlord, Vaggie, and six feet taller than you."

Vaggie: "She'd've been a foot and half less taller with her head missing."

Charlie: "Okay."

Charlie: (drawing a new doodle of vaggie) "This is you ALIVE. THIS-" (taps doodle aggressively) "-is our long-term goal!"

Vaggie: ".....our?" (gay) (disbelieving)

Charlie: "..." (bi) (desperate)

Charlie: "...SO! WHO WANTS PIZZA!?"

#hazbin hotel #charlie morningstar #vaggie #chaggie #silly headcanons #incorrect quotes #inspired by: that one scene from lilo and stitch XD #charlie and the struggle to keep this smol angry woman alive #and NOT let her get killed MURDERING anyone #charlie doodling little hearts around “full of anger” vaggie later on without realizing it #then burning the evidence in a panic #then doing it AGAIN with the other doodle of vaggie #and keeping that one #for um #future reference #^w^;

[imminent-danger-came]

But you are, my love, the astronaut Flying in the face of science I will gladly stay an afterthought Just bring back some nice reminders Yes! You are, my love, the astronaut Crashing in the name of science Just my luck, they sent your upper half It's a very nice reminder

—Astronaut by Amanda Palmer

#*crying* and can you see the means without the ends #in the random frantic action that we take #the Wukong - MK - Macaque 3 way foil fucking kills me dude #whatever #why didn't he just stop. right here? he was already so much stronger than anyone ever needed to be #*ugly sobbing* #lmk #lego monkie kid #lmk edit #lmk MK #lmk Macaque #lmk SWK #my edits #shadowpeach #yes the last one is about wukong's lack of freedom what of it #also I don't think I need to specify this but I hope no one thinks this is me shipping MK & Wukong lol #cause it's not #Really this is just part of my queer platonic shadowpeach agenda

[vita-divata]

They are ready to take down some bad guys

#my art #tiger and bunny #im redesigning Yuri's suit to be similar to Kotetsu's and bunny's #it's still in development so this isn't his final look #this is my fav au for Yuri's redemption ark #here's some more notes for this au: #he's still a rogue hero so he doesn't have sponsors or anything like that #he's not in the taibani team but they help each other sometimes #they're poly because i said so #this time he's redeeming himself by saving people without killing anyone #if canon can't do my boy justice then I'll do that myself 😌 #yuri petrov #kotetsu kaburagi #barnaby brooks jr #usatoratsuki #i was too tired to color it properly so it looks lazy #don't mind that

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Frank! fantasy flavor!

rambles:

i really wanted to blend that monk-class inspiration w/ Frank's personal vibe... i like to think that i Succeeded!

i turned his tie into a sort of brooch since, yk. bowties aren't all that Fantastical. they miss the style. also i think they'd be more comfortable with something smaller since he's very active and needs a wide range of maneuverability

i bet Eddie or someone wheedled them into adding the leather shoulder pauldrons - leather to keep it a bit more flexy, and also. it just looks Cool!

figuring out what would replace his vest was tough. i didn't want them to be entirely unprotected, but i couldn't give him straight armor. though i will admit! a sort of tight-fitting crop top was Considered! but i landed on a gambeson vest as the best fit - comfortable, flexible, a Vest, while providing some level of protection! also, gambesons are quilted, which fits Frank's diamond-checkered vest!

ive already mentioned that one of my favorite outfit things is Flowy Pants Tucked Into Boots, so... that choice wasn't very character driven. except the boots are a tall ankle wrap - for that extra stability and strength! their shoes are pretty flexible and are only a few steps away from being slippers.

and the half-skirt - open skirt? - thing (still don't know what its called) is purely some self indulgence. i think Frank looks great in skirts!! also imagining him Throwing Down w/ the added flair of the skirt... damn. it'd probably help confuse enemies too - what're they gonna do next? who knows! the skirt is in the way and adding extra Movement!

i like to think that his knife is either in a sheath attached to the back of the belt, or they have it on their thigh (under the skirt) like Wally's bag. he probably never uses it... punching is the way to go for Frank methinks. it's probably reserved for cutting ropes and fruit

speaking of punching.... wrist wraps! inspired by boxing gauze! pads his knuckles, keeps his wrist compressed, its the best choice for physical combat. though the wrapped knuckles probably always have blood showing through anyway... or no yeah it's mostly other people's blood...

as for scars - Frank probably has quite the collection! i imagine that they've been picking fights since a young age, and in such a dangerous world he probably got hit a Lot until they learned how to hit back. and hit back Well. still, i wanted to give him a cool face scar with a very lame backstory - a book with a crisp, sharp spine corner fell off a high shelf and bonked them in the face at juuuust the right angle <3 he probably stays very fucking quiet about it which makes everyone think there's some intense traumatic backstory behind it. there isn't. Frank's just embarrassed.

closing note: i imagine that Frank has zero magic. literally none. cannot wield it for shit cannot utilize it. he's just like Howdy fr

#im Very happy with this outfit ngl #they probably know a bunch of different fighting styles... #and then stitches them all together into a Frankenstyle #get it? frankenstein's monster + frank + style - yeah yeah i know im hilarious #he probably stresses everyone tf out with how gung-ho they are in a fight Without Much Protection #like yeah gambesons can cushion blows and depending on the quality can lessen or even stop arrows / stabs #but frank's is a Vest. yeah it covers his vital organ area but like. their face? arms? legs? its free target practice #everytime eddie sees frank throw himself at an enemy w/ magic or Much Bigger Than Frank #he has about 100 heart attacks #catch him sprinting to cover's franks ass. they need it #frank Will look at someone way above his pay grade and go 'yeah i can take em' #(and that's why they consistently end up under poppy's healing wing) #julie unfortunately is on the same bullshit as frank #so if frank takes on someone he cant handle - so will she. without blinking! #though when she (or anyone else) tries it that's when frank goes 'are you crazy?! dont fight them they'll kill you' #frank has common sense when it comes to other people <3 not themself <3 #scribble salad #wh fantasy au #ah yes and the tiny knife... the glorified cheese knife... #even sally has a nice dagger and she's got some Powerful magic on her side #meanwhile frank is bringing fists to a gunfight smh #tryin ta think of a backstory for him for this au... #im thinking... he was either an orphan or his parents straight up Ditched him as a kid... #and he was taken in by a... fuck im missing the word. monastery? or something? #whatever it was it was run by somewhat spiritual people that raised & trained highly skilled/disciplined fighters #with the intent of 'you will fight for good blah blah blah' #maybe frank would sneak out and thats how he met julie? and he taught her some combat skills maybe... #& then he wound up running away w/ her or somethn #or he completed his training and went out to be a Soldier For Good but wound up following his own path & moral compass... idk

[imakemywings]

I do love Celebrimbor takes where post-death/rebirth he actually has very little to say to his family until they show some signs of remorse or personal growth from the atrocities they committed in Middle-earth.

#let him be angry!! #he left for a reason!! #and I don't think he wants comfort from a guy (MAEDHROS) who slaughtered an entire culture and killed and kidnapped children #if he's going to anyone for comfort it's cousins and other extended family #he left Curufin and Celegorm before the Second Kinslaying was even on the horizon because he couldn't defend them anymore #I cannot IMAGINE the horror of learning from a distance of the things they did after that #I honestly cannot imagine he is very interested in having a relationship with his father/uncles after this #at least not without some SERIOUS repenting on their parts #rambling #celebrimbor

[greasby]

i have become extremely fond of this man

#team fortress 2 #tf2 #saxton hale #tf2 fanart #my art #yes hes crazy and would kill me without a second thought but i think hes cuteyyy #i think hes one good steak dinner date away from falling in love with anyone

[rottengurlz]

lover, don't touch me // leave, i am a danger to you // but ooh, i hunger for you

#this is leona's vampire lover audra #i guess you could say the first time they met was when audra nearly killed her in a blood lust because she hadnt fed in so long #idk how to describe it well but audra suddenly stopped devouring her when leona looked at her with no fear in her eyes #but looked at audra like she was something to worship #she whispered that audra was so beautiful even as her own blood was splattered between them and staining her lips #leona had never seen someone or something so perfect and powerful #power that she wanted and knew exactly how to get when audra whimpered over the slightest bit of praise #i never talk about them but i am CONSTANTLY thinking about them <3 #some fun little facts is leona killed her husband in cold blood because he was pitiful and boring #she married the first person to show any interest in her just to get away from her family #he would have been a perfectly good husband for anyone else #but the best part of their marriage was when she stabbed him in the stomach 47 times and felt his blood splatter against her skin #for audra OBVIOUSLY had to make another oc who would do anything to be loved even if it means destroying herself #audra was turned very suddenly and without any guidance #she murdered her lover without even realizing it she opened her eyes to find them splattered across every surface of the room #because of that shes done everything she can to protect herself from others even if it means starving herself of blood #until she goes into a frenzy #leona is the first person she has ever willingly fed off of #idk if willingly is the right word since leona practically begs her to do it #i really want to remake leona now......... #i like how leona looks but i want her to match audra better #mysims #the sims 4 #simblr #sims 4 screenshots #sims 4 cas #ts4 cas #sims 4 edit #ts4

[maeamian]

Not sure I'm the exact right person for this oral history, but since the birdsite is imploding and advertisers might fucking try some shit over here it's a good time for all of us to remember everyone's favorite meme: "John C Miller, CEO and President of the Denny's Corporation, is a Capitalist Running Dog and his wealth must be seized and redistributed to the people”

Back in '16 or so, Denny's had a reasonably large presence on this site, from a non-artistic standpoint it's fair to say that whoever was running that blog did a pretty good job of keeping up to date on the current memes and staying relevant. Many of us, myself included, kinda just got used to them being here and let it happen, gave it little thought, maybe gave it a chuckle from time to time. At some point someone was like 'actually it sucks that a major corporation is trying to hang out with us and be our friend, they were, of course, absolutely right, and their genius response was to create a meme that they couldn't fucking coopt, hence "John C Miller, CEO and President of the Denny's Corporation, is a Capitalist Running Dog and his wealth must be seized and redistributed to the people" became the fun new thing.

"Coopt this you old so and so" was the idea and it worked pretty well, they did try it, but in a way that clearly was dancing around the central premise everyone knew they wouldn't be able to engage with. They stuck around for a little while longer, but it was clearly a major turning point in their ability to use this site to hang out with us, a good thing.

The point, as advertisers try to find new, less feral places to spend their advertising budgets, is that we don't have to just ignore them, that's a good start, but we can bite their fucking hands if they try it. We do not have to play nice with advertisers trying to be our friends, we can be feral.

Anyhow, I definitely am not positive I've gotten every detail right, so if there's any major corrections anyone needs to add, feel free, memedoccumentation had a post about it that helped me refresh my memory although my analysis of aspects differ from this point in history, as it were, but if you want to read up a bit more this is a solid starting point that has some fun examples

#Mostly they're right Denny's trying to respond killed the meme #But it also killed the Denny's account #So it was IMO a pyrrhic victory for them #in a way that the contemporary documentation of the time probably couldn't've known #We should probably ignore the celebrities cause they're just people #and while I don't care for them I also think that as people we shouldn't be assholes to them without cause #but advertisers inherently give you cause to bite them by being advertisers IMO #Mostly just haven't seen anyone else circulating anything about this #And given the overall discussion on the site about how to handle contingencies from what's happening over there #This seemed at least worth putting back into the public consciousness

[mayasaura]

Actually. Looking at the chronology. The last time Gideon and Harrow talked alone before the pool scene, Gideon accused Harrow of being a jealous creep for telling her to stay away from Dulcinea.

A whole lot of stupifying things happened in between, but really, it wouldn't be surprising if her first panicked reaction to Harrow disrobing was to think Harrow was making a move on her. Relationship definitely hurtling toward something.

#the locked tomb #gideon the ninth #griddlehark #so much happened those last two days at Canaan House #I lost track of just how much relationship upgrade Gideon and Harrow went through #Gideon goes from insisting Harrow is jealous over her and not envious (guarding something that's hers and not coveting something that isn't) #to lashing out at Harrow in the worst way she can manage without physical violence (threatening to leave her) #to assuming Harrow is a murderer and resolving to kill her herself rather than let anyone else touch her #to finding out Harrow had a good reason for everything she'd done and just didn't trust or respect Gideon enough to tell her #to finding out Harrow's worst secrets and swearing herself to Harrow #....in the span of about. mmmm. three hours? ish? #probably less #depends on how long she was wandering around or with the Sixth really #I'd say someone give that girl a nap but for once she actually got one

[tanglepelt]

Dc x dp idea 8

What if Danny was actually Bruce’s son

Bruce is full aware he had a kid. Dick and Bruce actively knew Danny when he was a baby.

The kicker is that a natural portal opened up under him and stole him. Like they were at a park or something and with a green glow poof he is gone.

I’d blame clockwork for it. He want pariah sealed away and without Danny no one fixed vlads screw up

So danny as a baby is now in a different dimension. Fentons adopt (kidnap) the baby they find in the woods. Jazz wanted a baby brother and this baby came from a portal from the ghost zone.

They discover Danny is phantom. He didn’t know he was stolen from the woods. Jazz is panicking cause that’s her baby brother and there parents are insane. Cue parents wanting to poke and prod not nicely

Danny goes and gets Ellie cause he cares about his clone and they flee. They get in the ghost zone and clockwork does his messing around with time lines. Now Dani and Ellie are in the dc universe.

On the dc side. The same glowing green portal that stole Bruce’s son just opened and spit out Danny and Dani.

#danny fenton #danny phantom #dc x dp #dp x dc #dp x dc prompt #dani phantom #dp dc crossover #Damian is not the only blood child #Danny loves his clone sister #Bruce probably hates magic a lot cause of this #he somehow has even more trackers on his kids #like they can’t go anywhere without like 4 on them at any moment #he is paranoid #he has also tried to find the portal and failed #Danny would fight anyone who touched his little sister #Bruce is like 2 for 1 #no point in killing a non violent clone

[theoppositeofhero]

Not them serving looks…

#ncis hawai’i #kacy #kate whistler #lucy tara #my favourite scene of this ep #not that anyone asked but my fav scene from ep 1 was ernie and sam hanna where ernie spoke of Whistler without mentioning Whistler #I am so happy that they are back! #Schrödinger's looks where the looks may or may not kill you

[tennessoui]

oh ho ho au where there’s been a brutal murder and all signs point towards anakin being guilty….but during the trial prep work, obi-wan, not on trial at all btw, confesses to the murder.

the prosecution knows he didn’t do it, but his dna is at the scene, there’s security photos of him close by the murder scene, there’s enough circumstantial evidence that it makes it incredibly hard to prove that he didn’t do it. there’s a ton of evidence to prove that anakin did it, but there’s also not a small amount of evidence that obi-wan did it which makes it really difficult

(anakin definitely definitely did it. but obi-wan feels an incredible amount of both guilt for the loss of life at the hands of a boy who he has vouched for so ardently in the past and also a fervent and insane devotion to anakin, and he can’t let him suffer for his crime when obi-wan could suffer for his crime instead <3 that’s the way things should be)

(anakin would snap out of his stunned stupor and tell the judge and jury that obi-wan is innocent and he’s the actual murderer, but like. it’s really hot. it’s like really hot that obi-wan’s going to give his freedom away so that anakin can live untroubled. no one’s ever loved him so much, not even the devoted wife of his sitting in the audience. this is different. this is everything. this is like. breathtaking.)

#Kit’s silly lil AUs #obikin #im imagining this in a gffa setting #the chancellor has been killed by anakin #but way before anyone thinks the chancellor is a bad guy #or corrupt #so it’s like a crime crime #and obi-wan is like no that’s my padawan if he learned how to (checks notes) brutalize a persons skull with a paper weight then #I taught him that #so he confesses and uses their training bond to pull all the details and story from anakins mind #without anyone knowing #anyway of course obi-wan is sentenced and anakin breaks him out and they go live amongst the stars #as fugitives #and it’s pretty easy to convince obi-wan into bed with anakin when they’re both fugitives #like he already gave his freedom up for his padawan #what’s his body compared to that? #what’s his heart?

[wellthebardsdead]

Isobel: that- Glaive… I… I remember it- I remember… *looks from the sorrow glaive to Halsin, remembering a crown of madness overtaking her mind and her charging to attack the druid, leading him no choice but to wield his weapon up in self defence* how I died…

Tav: I… are you saying- Halsin killed you?

Halsin: I did… and for it ketheric unleashed the shadow curse as per Shars wish… it is a guilt I have harboured for a century…

Isobel: it- wasn’t his fault. I attacked him first but- I can’t remember why- one moment we were on each others side against my fathers army and then… it was like my mind wasn’t my own. *smiles up at him* there are no hard feelings on my end.

Halsin: but there is a heavy grief left in my heart… my actions lead to ketheric unleashing that unspeakable curse. And with it thaniel was torn from Oliver, countless lives taken… and all from blood spilled by my hand.

Isobel: … *reaches up and hugs him tight* you aren’t responsible for my fathers madness.

Halsin: … *sighs and hugs her back* and get forgiveness does little to ease the ache in my heart… but I thank you for it, Isobel.

#so Halsin was the one who killed Isobel but he did it in self defence #I can’t imagine Isobel or Halsin turning violent on each other or anyone without some sort of outside force #it’s entirely possible ketheric had already turned to shar before Isobel’s death as his brother openly worshipped her #after his wife’s death he probably already jumped off the deep end #halsin baldur's gate 3 #isobel bg3

[spectrum-color]

Truths the aSoIaF fandom isn’t ready for: Jaime is just as deluded as Cersei in Feast.

The man spends his chapters patting himself on the back and talking about how he’ll be remembered as the legendary Goldenhand the Just after he goes after a few outlaws while he has spent the entire book…trying to forcibly consolidate the Riverlands under Lannister rule after his family terrorized them for years, sent brutal gangs of mercenaries to rape and burn peasants, and broke guest right (and thousands of years of Westerosi tradition with it) to murder their Lord Paramounts daughter and their king, whose corpse was mutilated and paraded around after the fact by the family his father installed in their traditional Lord Paramounts seat. All of this for a war he started because he was having an incestuous affair with his sister. Sure Jaime, you’re gonna be a beloved figure!

#a song of ice and fire #asoiaf #jaime lannister #like the lannisters managed to burn their bridges with both the lords and the smallfolk #and thoroughly piss on the ashes #he’s lucky any green eyed blonds are even able to walk around there without getting jumped #btw don’t forget the original reason tywin sent his murder gangs to the riverlands #because jaimes brother was accused of trying to kill bran stark #something tyrion didn’t do but both jaime and his son did #I will have no sympathy for anyone but tommen and myrcella when house lannister goes down #hell I didn’t have sympathy for joffrey even though I know grrm intended for it #they made their bed #and none of them have really reflected on it