#and guillermo needed to leave! because everything WOULD stay the same. it IS staying the same. | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

mothguillotine · 6 months

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Is There A Vampire Dentist?

CW: smut at the beginning, slight dub-con but idk if it really counts, just wanna be safe

The dinner with your parents had shaken you up. You know that they could never force you away from Staten Island (due to your strength), but they will definitely try. Them showing up and ruining your new relationships is a likelihood. You have no idea how Nandor, Laszlo, or Nadja would react to your parents' overall shittyness.

Unfortunately, the vampires noticed the change as soon as you came back home. Guillermo had promised not to tell anyone what had happened that night, even though he encouraged you to tell Nandor. You knew Guillermo wouldn't judge you. After being alive for centuries, vampire standards are really high, and the idea that they could think less of you because of it was probable.

Nandor had been the first to notice, and then when he told the others they came to the same conclusion, you must miss some of your things. After you were attacked, you never went back to your dorm to get anything. It wasn't like the vampires were lacking in the cash department, so they just bought you things.

The things they bought you just weren't enough, though. You needed your things, not just new everything. So the vampires sent Guillermo to get your things. After asking Oscar where you used to live, he heads over to the university you stayed at. When he gets to your dorm room, he knocks on the door and is greeted by a tall ginger woman, Ness. When Guillermo talked to Oscar earlier, he had warned him about her. You did NOT like Ness. That wasn't unknown information to Guillermo, but why you didn't, he did not know.

“What?” she asks.

“I'm here for your roommates stuff,” Guillermo explains, “she isn't coming back and-,”

“I don't care,” she says, moving out of the doorway for Guillermo.

“Okay.” Guillermo says, going in the room with trunks. When he enters, he sees another woman in the room sitting on presumably your old bed.

“Kelsey, get off the bed,” Ness tells her, “he's getting her shit out of here.”

“Whatever,” Kelsey says and gets down.

Guillermo quickly shoves your drawers of clothes into the trunks. He then removes all of your desk supplies and grabs your laptop. After that, he grabs your clothes and shoes out of the closet, as well as your make-up and hair stuff.

Finally, he grabs your bedding and blankets. Luckily, no further was in your room that wasn't university property, so he was done. Then he drags the trucks out in the hallway, and then he goes in to double-check he got everything. When he confirms he is done, he turns to leave and sees Kelsey and Ness looking way more than friendly.

“You slept with your girlfriend's roommate?” Guillermo asks Kelsey.

“Ex-girlfriend.” Kelsey says, “Anyways why the hell does it matter to you? You are just picking up her shit.”

“Well she's my friend, and both of you don't deserve her.” he tells them and leaves without another word.

_________________________________________

Back at home, you are sleeping in front of a fire. The night prior, Nandor (probably Guillermo actually) had set up a spread of furs and candles around the fireplace in your room. The gesture had really touched you, and so did he. You both had been occupied all evening, and after everything, you had fallen asleep in the arms of your lover.

That day, you slept exceptionally well, and so did Nandor, who had woken up a bit ago and was observing you as you slept. Every day that you spent together had made him more and more sure that you were it for him. The night before had proven that Nandor was falling fast.

He was disappointed that he had to leave you for a whole weekend but he also knew that it was probably a good idea to spend a few days apart, at least that is what you told him. Which at first made him upset until you explained that ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’.

Nandor knew he had to leave soon to meet Sean and Laszlo at the car, but first, he wanted to have you. The night before, you both had fallen asleep without getting dressed, so he simply moves the fur that was draped on you. For a second, he is worried he woke you up when he sees you move, but when you stop, he continues on his path between your legs.

He starts with small licks directly on your clit to which he watches your reaction. When you don't move he presses harder to which you moan in your sleep. Nandor continues to pick up the pace until you wake up.

“Fuck,” you say, grabbing his hair. Nandor moans on you when you pull at his hair ever so slightly. You can feel yourself starting to get closer to your orgasm.

“Nandor!” you moan loudly, “I'm- fuck, I'm so close.” He then switches to sucking on your clit which makes you spiral over the edge. You pull Nandor up to kiss you as soon as you are done and you taste yourself on his tongue.

“Are you ready?” Nandor asks you.

“Yeah,” you tell him, and he moves to enter you.

He goes slower than normal due to the lack of warming up, and when he is about halfway in, he stops.

“Are you okay?” he asks you.

“Yes, Nandor, I promise.” you tell him, “Just fuck me already.”

After a bit he is fully in you, he brings his lips down to your neck. While his hickeys won't last long it doesn't stop him from trying, leaving your neck full of them for the next few hours. When Nandor is happy with the amount of hickeys on your neck he finally moves. One of your hands moves to grab his bicep. Nandor continues to pound into you and both of you are moaning a lot.

Suddenly there is a knock at the door.

“Hurry up old chap you are gonna be late.” you hear Laszlo yell.

“Go away Laszlo!” Nandor yells at the door and goes back to the matter at hand.

“Fuck,” you say, “I'm gonna come again.”

He feels you tighten around him and knows that you are right so he moves one of his hands to your clit. To which you are immediately coming around him. This makes Nandor in turn also come and you feel him inside you. When he pulls out his cum spills out of you. He falls down next to you on the pelts of fur.

“Good morning,” you tell him smiling, “What did I do to deserve being woken up like that?”

“Did you not enjoy it?” Nandor asks you.

“Oh no.” you tell him, “Quite the opposite, my love.”

“Good,” Nandor says and moves to kiss you again to which you let him.

“Babe you have to go or you are gonna be late.” you tell him when you pull apart. He instead goes to kiss you again and this time you move away.

“Nandor,” you tell him, giving him a raise of your eyebrow, “Laszlo is waiting for you.”

“I don't want to go to Sean's cabin,” he tells you, “I want to stay here and be with you.”

“Nandor, you have to go babe.” you tell him.

“Do I have to?” he asks, looking at you batting his eyelashes at you. To which you push his face back and stand up off the furs.

“Come on, they are all waiting for you,” and offer him your hand to stand up.

“If I knew any better I would say you are trying to get rid of me,” he says and takes your hand and stands up.

“Good thing you do know better,” you tell him and kiss him, “I will be here as soon as you are back on Sunday. Me and Nadja just planned on staying in and watching mamma mia.”

“Okay,” he says, giving up arguing with you.

_________________________________________

Both of you get dressed and head downstairs where Laszlo is waiting. Nadja and Guillermo are arguing in the corner while Colin is standing with many bags and camping equipment next to Laszlo. There also are a few trunks in the foyer which makes the space almost nonexistent.

“What are all these?” you ask confused.

“Surprise!” Nadja shouts, “We got your things.”

“My things?” you ask.

“Yes, from your university.” Laszlo says.

“Thank you guys, so much,” you tell them, “I thought I was never gonna get it back.”

“Of course we did,” Nadja tells you, “this is your home now.”

Nadja moves to hug you and when you do you also feel everyone else join. You all stand there until Colin joins in and Lazlo breaks off.

“Nandor, we have to go.” Laszlo says.

“Yes, yes.” Nandor says and turns to face you, “I will miss you.”

“I'll miss you too,” you tell him, moving to kiss him gently, “I lo- I hope you have a good trip.”

“I hope you have a good weekend as well, my love,” Nandor says, “Good bye.”

“Bye,” you tell him, and he leaves.

_________________________________________

The first night was easy, you and Nadja got drunk on many cocktails she called ‘Throat Juice’. Mamma Mia and Mamma Mia 2: Here We Go Again are played at some point in the night as well. By the end of the night both you and Nadja are laughing so hard that you are tearing up, until Guillermo tells you both its time for bed.

“Come on,” Guillermo tells you both, “You both should have been asleep an hour ago. The sun is coming up soon and-”

You and Nadja start to laugh again uncontrollably. Guillermo looks completely done with the both of you at this point.

“We wanna stay upppp!” you tell him, “We just won't sleep! No sleep!”

“No sleep! No sleep! No sleep!” you both start chanting.

“You both have to go to sleep.” Guillermo says seriously, “If Nandor and Laszlo came back to both of you burned to a crisp because you didn't want to sleep they would probably kill me.”

“Okay fine,” you say, “I don't want you to die or anything.”

Nadja makes a noise that seems like she disagrees and you elbow her.

“Okay,” Guillermo says, opening the door, “Here is your room, go to bed.”

“Okay,” you say sadly, “Good night Nadja!”

“Good night! Sleep well!” she shouts from down the hall with Guillermo ushering her downstairs.

_________________________________________

When you wake up you feel nasty and take a bath. The tub is filled to the brim with bubbles and is lavender scented. It's also very hot. You start by washing your hair and then your body. You take a mental note to have Nandor join you in the bath when he returns.

The peacefulness in the bathroom is quickly finished when Nadja knocks on the door.

“Do you want to go hunt down at the bars?” Nadja asks you through the door.

“Yeah!” you yell back, “Give me like 30 minutes!”

“Okay!” Nadja yells.

So you hurry up and finish up. You dress yourself in dark clothing so that way the shadows will hide you and the blood doesn't stain as bad. When you are all ready to go, you meet Nadja downstairs.

_________________________________________

Saturday night was not unusual. Both of you had drained a few drunks outside of a bar downtown and, in doing so, had felt the effects. You both were at the very least tipsy.

As the night drew on, Nadja and you returned home to watch some movies, and when the hours passed, Guillermo got you both ready for bed. The next morning you wake up and get ready for the day excited that Nandor is coming home today. You brush your hair and your teeth. While you do so you can't help but wonder, do vampires go to the dentist?

_________________________________________

“Yeah, I'm really excited about Nandor coming home soon.” you tell the camera, “It feels like he's been gone forever, even though I know it's only been a few days. I just really miss him and-”

You are cut off by loud pounding at the door. The knocks startle you. They are loud and echo throughout the house. You stand from the sofa and take off your mic. When you get to the foyer, the knocks happen again, which causes Guillermo to come down the stairs and Nadja from down the hall.

“Who is it?” Guillermo asks.

“I don't know.” You tell him.

“Gizmo, go open the door.” Nadja says, and then it happens again. This time, though, someone yells your name through the door.

“We know you are here!” your dad shouts, “Open this door right now!”

“It's my fucking parents.” you whisper, “shit, shit, shit.”

“Why are they here?” Nadja asks you, which causes Guillermo to give you a look as if to say ‘tell her’.

“They want me to leave with them.” You tell her, “The other night I went to see them and they told me they were moving back to Michigan.”

“Where is Mich-e-gan?” she asks you, “Is it far?”

“Yeah,” you tell her, the pounding continues as well as the shouting, “I don't want to leave but what happens when they call the cops? Because trust me they will.”

“We have to hypnotize them,” Guillermo says.

“No,” you say, “I can't.”

“It's the only option,” he tells you.

“Gizmo is right, my dear.” Nadja says, “They must leave before they draw too much attention to us.”

“I don't know if I can,” you tell Nadja honestly, “I mean they're my parents.”

She pulls you in for a hug and then says, “You have to, my dear.”

“I know,” you say and make your way down the hall to the front door. After taking a moment, you open the door to find your parents standing there.

“We have been standing outside, freezing.” your mom says.

“It is extremely rude not to let us in.” your dad follows with.

“Why are you guys here?” you ask.

“Sweetie, we know you haven't been going to classes or staying at the dorm. You are living here with a bunch of weirdos,” your mom says, “We are just concerned about you, and we think that moving back home with Nani and everyone else. Your cousins miss you so much.”

“I'm not coming back home.” you tell them, “I'm not moving back to Michigan. I'm not going anywhere with you. You guys can't control me anymore.”

“Sweetie, it's not like that.” your mom says.

“Yes, it is. My whole life has always been about what you guys want. You want me to be a perfect student. Done. You want me to move to Staten Island. Done. You want me to go to college here so that way I don't leave you. Done. You want me to be the perfect fucking daughter? Well I tried my hardest and it still wasn't enough for you. I'm done, I'm staying here.”

“You have obviously been brainwashed.” your dad says.

“What is a ‘brainwash’?” a voice says from behind your dad, Nandor.

“Your home!” you say, ignoring your parents for a moment as you run to him and pull him in for a kiss.

“I said I was coming back today.” he tells you, “Who are they?”

“uh, they are my parents.” you tell him.

“Oh, hi, I am her boyfriend, Nandor.” he says happily waving.

“How old is he? Forty?” your mom asks with a disgusted look on her face.

“No, actually, I'm 761,” Nandor says to which you cringe.

“You need to come with us. You aren't safe here.” Your mom says.

“Know if anyone is not safe here, it's you two.” Laszlo says.

“Laszlo, stop.” You tell him, but you go unheard.

“That sounds like a threat.” your dad says.

“Oh no, it's a promise.” Laszlo says.

“Oh I'll have you know that I've been in a few fights with my day, and I can definitely take down a brit.”

“Guys, stop!” you shout.

“I'll have you know I've lived here longer than you have been alive.” Laszlo says.

“STOP!” you shout louder than before stomping your foot down on the concrete path which cracks under the pressure, everyone stops.

“What is going on?” your mom asks.

“Mom, dad, listen to me,” you start and then hold out your hand, “I command you to leave and go to Michigan. You both decided to let me stay here. When people ask about me, you will give them vague answers and tell them that I don't talk to you anymore, I went no-contact.”

“We will do as you please,” they both say and walk down the steps. After they leave, you go back inside and sit down in the library on the sofa. A few moments later, Nandor follows you in and sits next to you.

You lean over on Nandor, to which he pulls you close. After that, you can't help but let the tears fall as Nandor comforts you. Soon enough, you are sobbing against him.

You both stay like that for a while until Guillermo comes in and gets Nandors' attention.

“What, Guillermo?” he asks, “Can't you see I'm busy?”

“Nadja and Laszlo have something to cheer her up.” he says, “If she's up for it?”

“Yeah, I could use a distraction.” you tell them both.

“Okay they would like to play a song for you.” he tells you, “They have been practicing for a while.”

“Okay,” you say and a little while later you are all gathered around the piano. The tune that Laszlo plays is familiar but you can't quite put your finger on it until Nadja starts singing.

“Ooh, You can dance. You can jive.

Having the time of your life. Ooh, see that girl. Watch. that scene. Digging the dancing queen,” Nadja starts and you clap along enjoying the song, “Friday night and the lights are low. Looking out for a place to go Where they play the right music. Getting in the swing You come to look for a king. Anybody could be that guy. Night is young and the music's high. With a bit of rock music. Everything is fine. You're in the mood for a dance. And when you get the chance,”

Laszlo joins Nador for the chorus, “You are the dancing queen. Young and sweet. Only seventeen. Dancing queen. Feel the beat from the tambourine, oh yeah. You can dance. You can jive. Having the time of your life. Ooh, see that girl. Watch that scene. Digging the dancing queen.”

You know, right then, watching Nandor, Laszlo, Nadja, Guillermo, and even Colin, that you would be okay. You love these crazy vampires and their fierce bodyguard. This is everything you've ever wanted and more. A real family. You smile as Najda and Laszlo finish the song.

“What did you think?” Nadja asks you.

“I love it,” you tell her.

Masterlist

#nandor the relentless #nandor the relentless x reader #what we do in the shadows #wwdits #lazslo cravensworth #nadja of antipaxos #wwdits nandor #guillermo de la cruz #female reader

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patheticpaprika · 1 year

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Just found this completely written in my drafts from January cause I got incredibly annoyed at it and abandoned it, but feck it posting it anyways, why not. So you know how in wwdits when the credits hit in the cult episode (s3 ep8) this song comes on to punch you in the gut after everything you've just watched?

"Have you ever considered for one moment that I might be happy for the first time in decades?! DECADES!"

Nandor hates being a vampire. He sees it as constant sameness that weighs down on him and washes away any purpose or belonging. But Guillermo brings him back. To him, vampirism is nothing but a gift and a reason for respect.

Now imagine a future episode, after Guillermo has been turned by Dereck. He's returned to the house and refuses to play the familiar anymore. He refuses to be their inferior. He's determined to change the sameness. Yet Nandor is too busy being upset that he wasn't the one to turn him and fully expecting him to finally leave for good causing him to be extra prickly and dismissive. The others just treat him like he was still human. How can anything truly change if they refuse to acknowledge anything has?

"Nothing ever changes in this house. Nothing is ever going to change. Unless I change it."

He had already become stronger than them. He had already demanded respect before. He had grown confidence and strength in himself. He'd done this all before. Vampirism solved nothing because he wasn't the one that refused to change.

He'll never be enough for Nandor, will he? He was never inadequate, Guillermo had long since grown past that. He just had always believed he was.

He is finally done. He says his goodbyes and leaves to be his very cool vampirey self without them. He's left, and this time he has no reason to come back. Nandor believes Guillermo only stayed to be turned into a vampire. Nandor's worst fears have finally been "confirmed," although only caused by his own manifestation.

Guillermo was his catalyst. Without him, the sameness of forever bores down on him. Guillermo makes him happy. For so long he'd been searching for someone that would make him like eternity but he'd been there all along. Yet all he had been doing was expecting he'd leave. He craves change but is terrified of its uncertainty. He desperately seeks closeness but is too scared to believe he can ever have it. No one could ever see him in his entirety and ever want to stay. This was simply further proof. He loved and was loved back but he refused to accept the possibility and hid behind his wall of indifference.

Mr. Emotional-Inteligence-of-A-Brick finally does a little self-reflection and realizes he needs Guillermo there. He makes him happy. He tries to get Guillermo to come back, but it's too little too late.

"Have you ever considered my happiness, Nandor?! You say you need me there and then act like you don't care about me. I'm done being not enough for you. I'm far better than that." "I am sorry Guillermo... I did not realize I made you so unhappy." "Yes because you never realize! Why do you even try to act like you care?" "I do care!" "Oh you do? Then tell me why." "...I" "Goodbye Nandor."

Yet with all his sulking and frustrated (not to mention terrible) attempts from his housemates to talk to him and cheer him up, Mr. Emotional-Inteligence-of-A-Brick finally does some reflection. He finally asks himself (maybe with some prompting from someone else) why Guillermo leaving was his worst fear in the first place. Why does he even care? Cue:

B-roll footage of Nandor drifting around the house before cutting back to him just standing there staring at the floor with a 1000 micro-expressions fliting on his face. But before the chorus kicks in. The music stops just long enough for Nandor to look up to the camera, absolutely terrified. (He cares for him. He needs him. He loves him. But it's too late, isn't it?) The credits hit and the song continues. So, when you're near me, darling, can't you hear me? S.O.S The love you gave me, nothing else can save me, S.O.S

#should I be making a fanfic for this lol #parallels my beloved #bonus points if it was episode 8 #although it'd be far too good of a season finale cliffhanger #wwdits #nandermo #wwdits s4 spoilers #wwdits speculation #although more like wishful thinking lol #Spotify #paprika's pantry of posts

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msfilmdiary · 3 years

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The Twilight Saga: Breaking Dawn–Part 1

Starring: Kristen Stewart, Robert Pattinson, Taylor Lautner, Nikki Reed, Ashley Greene, Kellan Lutz, Jackson Rathbone, Peter Facinelli, Anna Kendrick, Elizabeth Reaser, Billie Burke, Michael Sheen, Dakota Fanning, Jamie Campbell Bower, Christian Serratos, Chaske Spencer, Mackenzie Foy, Rami Malek, Christopher Heyerdahl, Alex Meraz, Bronson Pelletier, Julia Jones, Booboo Stewart, Sarah Clarke, and Jodelle Ferland

Screenplay by Melissa Rosenberg

Directed by Bill Condon

Cinematography by Guillermo Navarro

I do not own any of the pictures posted.

SPOILERS AHEAD

Breaking Dawn–Part 1 begins a few months after the events of the previous film, showing us many of Bella’s loved ones receiving invitations to her and Edward’s marriage. We see Jacob receive an invitation, and as a result, he turns into a wolf and skips town.

The night before the wedding, Bella has a dream of the event with all her friends and family there, and like her, wearing white. The dream ends with both her and Edward covered in blood, with them standing on a the ever-growing pile of Bella’s dead loved ones from bites of a vampire.

After this dream, Bella, with the help of Alice and Rosalie, gets ready for her wedding. She enters wearing a simple-yet beautiful white fitted gown to a a crowd full of her family and friends, with Edward waiting for her at the end of the isle. They marry, and all is to celebrate.

During the reception, Jacob returns after he had skipped town after receiving an invitation for the wedding. Bella and Edward happily exchange their vows and are married. Bella is thrilled to see Jacob, and the two share a dance in the woods. Bella admits that she and Edward plan to consummate their marriage on their honeymoon while she is still human, and Jacob becomes furious, knowing that this could possibly kill her. Sam and the other pack members restrain Jacob before he phases, and they leave.

After the wedding, the now married Bella and Edward spend their honeymoon on Isle Esme, and they have sex for the first time. The morning after, Edward realizes that Bella has numerous bruises and is upset at himself for hurting her, and vowed to not have sex again until she is a vampire.

Two weeks after their wedding, Bella vomits after waking up and notices that her period is late. Alice called Bella to ask if she was alright, as she saw a vision of something happening to Bella. She then talks to Carlisle, and Bella tells him that she believes that she’s pregnant. Edward is distraught because he knows that it’s highly unlikely that a human will survive giving birth to a vampire baby. Edward tells Bella that Carlisle needs to remove the baby, and Bella refuses, wanting to keep the child. She confides in Rosalie, and she acts as her bodyguard. They fly back home to Forks, Washington, and the baby rapidly grows.

Jacob rushed over to Cullen's house to see Bella. Bella is now heavily pregnant and is pale and underweight. Jacob is upset by Bella’s daily health and says that Carlisle should terminate the pregnancy to save Bella. Bella ignores both Carlisle's medical advice and Alice’s visions of her pregnancy, allowing the pregnancy to therefore progress. Bella soon realizes that the baby is craving human blood and she begins drinking human blood supplied by Carlisle from the local hospital. Bella’s health improves and the baby grows at an alarming rate, and as half-vampire, the fetus’s growth is accelerated more than a human one. Edward’s dislike for the baby lessens when he begins reading the baby’s thoughts, and Bella and him share a tender moment with their unborn child.

Then, Bella’s backbone breaks, and she collapses. Edward and Jacob realize that Bella cannot cope with the pregnancy, so Edward, Jacob, and Rosalie begin a C-section on Bella. Rosalie begins the procedure as Carlisle is out getting blood, but due to her hunger for human blood, Bella’s blood tempts her greatly. Jacob stops her and Edward picks up the blade and finishes the procedure. The morphine that Bella was given has not spread yet, so the pain she is experiencing is excruciating, and she falls unconscious.

After Bella wakes up and sees her healthy daughter, she chooses the name Renesmee, a combination of both her and Edward’s mother’s names. Before anyone knows it, her heart stops beating. Jacob desperately tries to resuscitate her with CPR while Rosalie takes the baby away. Edward then injects Bella’s heart with vampire venom in order to transform her, but it appears to be futile as Bella remains completely lifeless.

Panicked, Edward begins chest compressions. Jacob tells him that he won’t kill him, as it will be greater punishment for Edward to spend eternity knowing he was the reason for Bella’s death. Seth and Leah tell the pack that Bella didn’t survive the birth, and Jacob goes back inside in an attempt to kill Renesmee, as he believes that she is the reason for Bella’s death. After locking eyes with Renesmee, Jacob sees all the future versions of her and decides not to kill her, but imprints on her instead.

When the werewolves learn of Bella’s “death,” they travel to the Cullen’s in an attempt to kill Renesmee, fearing that she is too great of a threat. Edward, Alice, and Jasper defend their home with the help of Leah and Seth, later assisted by the rest of the Cullen family. Edward reads Jacob’s mind, and announces that Jacob has imprinted on Renesmee. The wolves’ absolute law is that they cannot harm anyone who has been imprinted on, so they leave.

Edward’s venom heals Bella, and she is cleansed and dressed. Over the course of a couple days, her bite marks heal, and her broken back and chest repair. Finally, the transformation is complete, and when her eyes open, they are blood red.

In the mid-credits, Aro, Marcus, and Caius receive a letter from Carlisle announcing that they have a new member of the Cullen family. Aro informs the two that their feud is not over yet, as they still have something that he wants.

Breaking Dawn–Part 1 translates key events from its source material onto its screen. The film is followed with romance, passion, and of course, none other than Bella and Edward’s wedding, honeymoon, and long-awaited consummation.

When compared to Eclipse or even the first installment of the series, Breaking Dawn–Part 1 gets pretty underwhelming after Bella and Edward’s honeymoon. I feel like this big moment between these two characters was built up to a point where me, along with the millions of other teenage girls watching the series, were disappointed. I knew what was going to happen, Edward would somehow hurt Bella (destroying what seems to be every piece of furniture in the process) and still give off this “I’m dangerous, stay away from me” vibe.

That being said, Breaking Dawn–Part 1 and Part 2 come from the same source material, so it's understandable that one feels a little more underwhelming than the other. The most excited I got when watching this film (after the honeymoon scene, of course) was when Bella woke up from her seemingly dead but not dead vampire transformation, and her eyes were blood red. There’s something about watching a character completely transform into something else. Bella, for three movies prior, was written to be sweet and demure, and give off this “damsel in distress” sort of feeling. But when she wakes up with blood red eyes, it's saying, “Everything now, as you know it, is about to change.”

I could only imagine seeing this film in theaters on opening night. Sadly, I was eight and a quite bit too young to see any of the installments in the series. However, I remember that the series was everywhere. You could not escape the Twilight craze, or the teen romance vampire craze, for that matter. Breaking Dawn–Part 1 changed the course of the whole series. We get the excitement, but dangerous, and sometimes bothersome Cullen clan dealing with a new matter–Bella Swan becoming a vampire.

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chelsfic · 4 years

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A Familiar’s Familiar - Guillermo x Reader (Gender Neutral) One-shot

Summary: Guillermo serves Nandor. You serve Guillermo. You are an under-familiar. That means you're responsible for all the household grunt work, specifically: dead body disposal. When a careless mistake results in injury, Guillermo has to pick up your slack and he's not happy about it. The guilt and shame you feel at disappointing your master is intense. But Guillermo knows just will make you feel better: a spanking.

Warnings: Dom/sub, spanking, Mean Guillermo

A/N: Pure fantasy.

“How many fucking times do I have to tell you to be careful with the lye?!”

Guillermo holds your hands under the faucet as ice-cold water rinses and soothes the angry red burns. His fingers are tight around your forearms, digging angrily into your skin.

“I’m sorry, master,” you whimper, hanging your head in shame. You can feel his disappointed eyes burning holes through the top of your head. What would he see if he could look inside? Would he recognize your pitiful love for him? Would it look anything like the feelings he has for his own master?

“I bet you are,” Guillermo responds, shaking his head. “You’re going to be useless to me for days because of this.”

Your breath catches and tears sting your eyes worse than the damn burns. “No, please, master!” you beg, hating the sound of your own voice, so whiny and cloying. “Please, I can still be useful!”

Guillermo turns off the tap and grabs a towel from the rack, gently wrapping your hands in the fluffy fabric. His touch is kind and soft even as he speaks with steel in his voice. “How, when you’re too stupid to do the simplest chores without nearly crippling yourself? I can’t believe how much time I’ve spent training you and still I have to deal with this shit.”

You sniffle and bite back the words that come automatically to your tongue. Simplest chores? You’ve been dissolving human remains in a solution of lye and water! Your more gruesome familiar duties include grave digging and dismembering corpses! And you work so hard to be good at it. Why? You don’t give a shit about Nandor. It’s all for Guillermo.

You swallow the angry words, and what’s left is the hollow ache of disappointing your master. Tears finally spill over your cheeks and you collapse forward, leaning your head into his soft chest and sobbing. Guillermo wraps his arms around you and rubs a few soothing circles into your back.

“Alright, that’s enough,” he sighs, pulling away after only a few seconds. Shame burns in your throat as you try to follow him, unwilling to let the embrace end so quickly. He retrieves a roll of gauze from the medicine cabinet and takes your hands in his, delicately covering your burns. “You think you can manage folding my laundry after this?”

---

It’s freezing outside but Guillermo’s forehead glistens with a thin sheen of sweat. He grunts as he hauls the heavy cadaver over the threshold, tossing it down the steps with impressive strength. You’d be swooning if you weren’t currently being eaten up with the guilt of your beloved master having to do your work for you.

“I’m sorry, master,” you say for the thousandth time as he turns to retrieve the next body from inside the house. You’re holding the door open, your bandaged hands hanging limp and incriminating at your sides.

“I don’t want to hear it,” Guillermo snaps.

His glasses are slipping down the bridge of his nose and you yearn to reach out and fix them for him, but that level of presumption is unthinkable at this very moment. It’s not that you don’t share soft moments with your master sometimes. At the end of the night after he’s tucked Nandor into his coffin, when everything is quiet and still, you turn down his bed for him, collecting his dirty laundry as he undresses and changes into his pajamas. You hardly ever speak during those moments but the quiet intimacy between the both of you is enough to fuel your hopeless fantasies. You pull the covers up over him and let the backs of your fingertips graze over his body as you do so. You dream about climbing into that big, soft bed with him, cuddling up and pressing your lips to his…

But Guillermo is not in the mood for soft indulgence. He’s annoyed and exhausted. The heavy burden of his disappointment weighs on you. You’re jumpy and nervous; you feel like at any second you’ll either burst into tears or scream at him to forgive you. Possibly both.

He comes back out with another wrapped bundle, significantly bigger than the last. He pauses in the doorway and glares at you; his cheek is spattered with blood. You might faint with how sinfully attractive he looks while giving you murder eyes.

“You know what?” he says. “I think you did this on purpose. When was the last time we had five bodies in the cell?!”

Nadja and Laszlo had themselves a blood feast last night. You’d spent ages scrubbing the fancy room before starting the grisly job of dismembering and dissolving the first corpse. Your accident had cut things short.

“No, master, I wouldn’t!” you plead. “Please let me help you!”

You bend down to grasp one end of the bundle but Guillermo stops you with a sharp slash of his hand through the air. “What did I tell you? You need to let those heal or you’ll have permanent damage.”

You’re forced to stand by and watch as your master painstakingly saws, hacks and cuts the bodies down to size. His jacket and apron are covered in blood by the time he finishes stuffing all the parts into the large, heavy-duty trash bags that you awkwardly hold open for him. He’s panting with the exertion and the job still isn’t done. Now he needs to carry everything into the basement where the vats of lye solution stand ready to do the job of dissolving the evidence.

He pauses to catch his breath. You catch his eyes and it’s suddenly too much to hold everything inside. A sob wracks your form and you drop your head, hiding your face as tears fall. Guillermo sighs and you imagine him rolling his eyes at you as he gathers the bags and trudges around to the basement entrance.

“You filled the tubs up too high,” he comments. “You need to leave some room at the top otherwise they’ll overflow like earlier, okay?”

He puts his hand up to the outside of one tub, indicating the fill line and you nod your head, eager to appease him even as exhausted, overwhelmed tears sting your cheeks. Guillermo is so strong. He lifts the deadweight of each body part with seeming ease, carefully lowering them into the tubs until each one is filled. When he’s finished he turns back to you and regards your crying, whimpering form for a moment before speaking.

“I’m going to go take a shower. There’s nothing more for you to do. I want you to go to your room and stay there. You’ll just be in the way, otherwise.”

---

The next day is the same, although thankfully Laszlo and Nadja refrain from another blood frenzy. But, again, you’re forced to stand idle as your master toils with the tasks that should be your responsibility. You can practically feel his aggravation with you bubbling beneath the surface of his cold demeanor, and it sends you into an anxious spiral. You live for Guillermo’s praise, for the rare little smiles he gives you when you’ve done something particularly good. For those coveted words as he strokes a hand through your hair. “Good familiar.”

This just feels awful.

You want to be good again but you don’t know how. You can’t make your body heal any faster. You can’t think of a way to make it up to your master. Well...certainly there are ways you’d like to make it up to him, but Guillermo has never indicated that he’d be interested in you in that way. Why would he be interested in you? A worthless, stupid excuse for a familiar who can’t do anything right…

You find yourself standing outside his bedroom door, heart in your throat as you rap your knuckles on the solid wood. His face is a stoic mask when he lets you in. As soon as the door shuts you fall onto your knees at his feet, wrapping your arms around his legs and pressing your face into his thick thighs.

“Please let me be good again, master!” you cry, not even knowing what you mean by the words.

But Guillermo sinks his fingers into your hair and you weep with relief. Guillermo knows what you need, doesn’t he? He’s served his master for so long, he must know how to help you.

“I wondered how long it would take you to finally come to me,” he muses, his fingernails dragging lightly over your scalp. You mewl and nuzzle your face into his thigh. For a fleeting moment you think about shifting over a few inches and pressing your mouth to the crotch of his khaki pants, wantonly rubbing your face against him and begging for the chance to pleasure him. But that would be for you, and that’s not what this is about, is it? He says your name and a shiver runs down your spine. “You won’t feel better until you’re punished.”

The revelation is so simple yet so fucking profound. You can earn back your place as Guillermo’s good familiar. Oh, god, you’ll let him do anything to you if he’ll only scourge the shame from your soul.

“Please punish me, master,” you tilt your head back and look up at him with wide, pleading eyes.

Guillermo’s lips curve into a smile. It’s not his “good job” smile or his “secret joke” smile and it’s certainly not the smile he reserves for Nandor. This is a smile like a knife’s edge and a sudden qualm echoes through your stomach. You’ve devoted yourself to this man, making it your goal to please him in the pathetic hope that he might simply like you. But you’ve never been at his mercy before.

“Wh-what are you going to do?” Your voice quavers.

Rather than answer you, he shows you. He helps you up, grasping your elbow rather than your injured hand, and walks you over to the bed. He sits, regarding you with cold, expressionless eyes and indicating your pants with a nod of his head. “Take those off.”

For a brief infinity you are struck motionless. Like a squirrel who, seeing a car on the road, cannot decide whether to sprint across to the other side or turn back to safety. You don’t have to do this. Guillermo might be mean and exacting, but he wouldn’t force you. Your fingers tremble as they move to the button of your jeans. Popping it open feels like opening Pandora’s box. What are you starting? And is it something you can ever come back from? Would you even want to?

“Good familiar,” he purrs, his voice soft as always. All doubts fly out of your head at those words. You scramble to shimmy the jeans down your legs, discarding them in a crumpled heap on the floor. Guillermo eyes you with a single arched brow and he doesn’t even need to say anything; you pick up the jeans and neatly fold them, setting them down on the bed beside him. His smile waters you, makes you feel stronger even as you’re putting yourself under his control.

He pats his lap and you step closer, stopping right next to him, unsure. It’s obvious what he intends to do but you’re horrifically shy about it. Does he want you to drape yourself over his knee? Or should you sit on his lap to start? What if you look like an idiot--a kid sitting on Santa’s lap? The questions and worries chase each other around in your mind until you’re paralyzed with indecision.

“Hush,” Guillermo says, reading the panic on your face. He puts his hands on your hips, turning you and pressing down on the small of your back until you’re lying across his lap, pinned. You sigh in pure relief, melting against him and shutting your eyes. Guillermo will take care of you. You don’t need to worry about what comes next or how to behave; you don’t even have to worry about displeasing him. Guillermo won’t let you mess up. He’s in charge now. A tiny sob escapes you at the thought.

“Thank you, master!” you cry, rubbing your cheek against the side of his fleshy thigh.

Guillermo’s hand smooths over your backside and goosebumps break out on your flesh. His hand is soft, delicate. He strokes you through your underwear, circling each round cheek before taking hold of the waistband and pulling down to expose you completely. From your position you can’t see his face. Is he looking at you? Inspecting you? Is he pleased with what he sees or is he detached and clinical?

“Don’t thank me yet, my little familiar.” There’s a smirk in his voice and then the first smack lands.

What did you expect? For a man who regularly lures people to their deaths to be gentle? His hand lands on your quivering flesh with brutal force. You hiss, tears springing to your eyes on impact. Before you have a chance to grapple with the pain of the first blow, a second one is falling on your other side. This time you moan and cry out, squirming on his lap.

Guillermo’s quiet voice reaches into you and tugs you back from the pain. “My good familiar,” he says and delivers another bruising smack. “Look how well you’re taking your punishment. I’m so proud of you, chiquis.”

His words unlock something inside of you and all of your anxiety, your shame, your sorrow and your love comes pouring out. You weep; big, wracking sobs shake your shoulders and you dig your fingers into your master’s leg, desperately clinging to him.

You cry out your thanks as his hand continues it’s merciless assault. The violence of that soft, delicate hand is shocking. He hits you over and over again, never landing on the same place twice, but always leaving behind a stinging, burning ache that feels like a brand on your skin. A brand of Guillermo’s dear name. You belong to him. The thought sends a thrill of arousal straight to your groin. He’ll never be yours but you don’t care if he’ll only allow you to be his .

Eventually the pain eclipses everything else, even the sweet surrender of giving in to your master’s justice. Even the revelation of his hard erection thrusting against your belly. The pleasant, fuzzy cloud that’s enveloped your senses begins to thin and you jump and sob with every slap.

“Please, master,” you finally cry, flinching and trying to pull away when you sense his hand raising for another blow. “Please stop.”

Guillermo’s hand comes down one last time, resting gently on your burning, bruised flesh. He brushes his palm over his handiwork and asks, “Do you feel better now, little one?”

It’s like waking up from anesthesia. The pleasant buzz of submission fades from your mind and you feel shaky and vulnerable, but also clean and renewed. “Yes,” you breathe, affection and gratitude filling your voice. “Was I good, master?”

Guillermo replaces your underpants and gently tugs you off his lap, laying you down on the plush fabric of his comforter. “You did so well, chiquis. I’m proud of you.”

You’re in your master’s bed, your head resting on his pillow. You’re shameless, burying your nose into the pillow and inhaling Guillermo’s scent. Your eyelids feel heavy and you really shouldn’t fall asleep here in your master’s space but oh, how you wish your little fantasy could come true.

“Am I a good familiar, master?” you ask. Your voice is tiny and afraid in the soft quiet of Guillermo’s bedroom.

He strokes his hand through your hair, pressing a kiss to your cheek and whispering, “You’re the best familiar.”

You laugh sleepily and scoff, “That’s not true, master. You’re the best familiar.”

Your eyes have somehow drifted closed and the next thing you’re aware of is the mattress dipping behind you as Guillermo climbs under the covers. He manhandles you a bit, until he manages to drag the blankets up over your body.

“Well…” he finally answers, reaching over to click off his bedside lamp. “Then you’re the best familiar’s familiar.”

#Guillermo de la cruz #guillermo de la cruz x reader #guillermo de la cruz fanfic #wwdits #wwdits fanfic #guillermo de la cruz imagine

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mollyencrypted · 3 years

Text

A Virals Valentine's exchange story for @fandomowltrash, for the prompt 'I hate Valentine's Day'! Sorry there's not much Tory&Ella here, but I hope it will suffice!

[AO3]

🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡🧡

Ben Blue hates Valentine's Day.

As far as he's concerned, it's a stupid piece of crap commercial trashfire. He's never understood why everyone behaves as if this one day is treated as the benchmark for how much you love somebody. (His parents used to go for dinner every February 14th, and look how that turned out for them.)

Fortunately for him, none of the rest of his pack like it much either. Hi and Shelton have been loudly lamenting their 'terminal datelessness' for as long as they've been interested in romance, Tory's always been utterly uninterested, and Ella swore off men forever after the Great Chance Claybourne Disaster. 'Forever' turned out to be just over a year, but she still distrusts socially mandated grand gestures on principle so as far as Ben's concerned it still counts, and whilst Jason and Madison are very much into Valentines' Day he will deny liking either of them until his dying day. Cooper, the lucky thing, lives in blissful ignorance on account of his being a dog.

They've been living crammed into the same apartment since college, or rather, the core Virals and Ella have, and Jason and Maddy have their own place but come over so frequently that they might as well be on the lease, and they've settled into a comfortable routine for That Day.

Jason and Madison go out for the stereotypical candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, and dress up nicely, and he holds the doors open for her and pulls out her chair for her and all that weird gendered crap because apparently that's a thing people do (holding the door for people is just polite, but she can pull out her own damn chair and most of the year she does, but something about Corporate Romance just rots people's brains).

Ella, Hi, and Shelton go to the cinema for Single People Movie Night and watch something as unromantic as possible before getting burgers and excitedly discussing whatever they just watched. This is a flawed endeavor, seeing as just about every film seems to have a shoehorned romantic subplot in it somewhere, but horror is generally a safe bet and all three of them love Guillermo del Toro. 'Single People Movie Night' is something of a misnomer, seeing as at least one of them has been dating someone on each night in question, but they regard it as a Sacred Institution (it's always capitalised when it's discussed in the Discord server) that is not to be interrupted for something as trivial as romance.

Tory and Ben...well, they could just stay home and take advantage of the lack of roommates, but it always feels too quiet in the apartment without the chaos of the pack around them, and so they walk down to the docks with Coop, and watch the sunset from Sewee, and wait for the stars to come out if the sky is clear enough. And it is absolutely not a Valentine's date, not even slightly. Ben likes his boat and the sea and the stars, and Tory likes the stars and the sea and Ben, and Coop likes going for walks with his favourite people and stopping along the way in order to be petted by various other people, and it doesn't need to be anything more or less than the warmth of his wonderful girlfriend pressed against his side and their enormous wolfdog lying sprawled at their feet, and the rocking of the waves beneath them all. It's sweet, and simple, and costs nothing, and Ben would spend the rest of his life like this if he could.

This year, however, their happy routine is disrupted.

Everything starts out as normal, with Hi and Shelton and Ella heading out for the first Single People Movie Night that can honestly be called that, all jingling of keys and 'See y'all later!' (Ella) and 'Bye, guys!' (Shelton) and 'USE PROTECTION!' (Hi), and Tory lacing up her sneakers as Ben grabs Coop's leash.

And then Coop throws up.

There isn't anything wrong with him, he's just eaten too much, but neither Tory nor Ben want to drag him outside and he doesn't seem in a hurry to move off the Best Couch anyway, so they end up sitting there with him and watching an episode of a wildlife documentary. Coop is utterly fascinated by the sea lions and is shamelessly exploiting Tory's concern in order to be cuddled and petted and fed treats. Neither she nor Ben are giving him any more food until morning, but they're both happy to give him the requested affection. And Ben has his girlfriend and their dog, and he can see the sea and the stars on TV, and it's not a bad way to spend an evening, aside from the dog vomit.

And then there's a commotion at the door and Shelton and Ella and Hi almost collapse inside, because apparently there was a mistake and the screening was overbooked, and they've been refunded and given replacement tickets for tomorrow afternoon, but that leaves them nothing to do this evening because nothing else playing appealed to all three of them.

They all fuss over Coop for a while, and then Hi suggests they just have a movie night at home instead.

They have movie nights most Saturdays, sometimes with Madison and Jason and sometimes without, but it seems like a good idea considering that none of them are going anywhere and at least one of them needs one eye on Coop.

Half an hour later they're crammed together in comfy clothes and finishing the sea lion documentary, because Coop refused to let them watch anything else until after it was over, and none of them mind because sea lions are cute. Ben's at one end of the couch, with Tory beside him and Coop's head in her lap, with the rest of him taking up the rest of the space. The others make a nest out of pillows and blankets on the floor, Ella leaning against Tory's legs and Shelton between her and Hi, and their shared mindspace humming with comfort.

They re-watch Pacific Rim, because it has mental bonds and friendship and family and dogs and giant fucking robots punching giant fucking monsters, and is therefore an excellent choice for a pack movie night, and when that's over they order pizza and re-watch Pacific Rim: Maelstrom and make fun of the terrible movie they almost made before del Toro stepped back in. They pause it at the scene where Mako and Jake are about to encounter Pentecost in the Drift because one of them needs to get the pizza, and then they carry on, and they make plans to go and see the third film as a group when it's released, and find some terrible movie to make fun of when Maelstrom is over, and it's perfect, and they all go to bed warm and happy.

Jason and Madison have a perfectly nice, utterly non-disastrous meal together. They're happy, and Ben doesn't begrudge them that. He's hate it, but it works for them. They can have their candlelit dinners and roses. He has his friends and his girlfriend and their dog and pizza and movie nights, and the sea and the stars.

And really, what could be better than that?

#virals series #tory x ben #fanfic #viralsvalentines

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demaury · 5 years

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the best of me (chap.2)

“If anything bad happens I flush the rings, I leave my bestman spot to Baz, and I fly back to Paris.“

OR. Eliott and Lucas have never worked up the courage to actually make a move, and thus spent years dancing around each other without ever acknowledging their feelings. However, an engagement party gone a little too wild, an hotel room and a very bad idea might be all it takes to make everything blow up. (read on ao3)

“LALLEMANT’S HERE.”

Lucas should have known that having Arthur and Basile at the same time around a pool wasn’t a good idea, yet it wasn’t until he heard his two friends wail as soon as he set a foot on the deck installed on the rooftop that he realized it was a completely fucked up idea. He barely had any second to blink before two pairs of arms grabbed him like vices; next thing he knew he was sputtering water after getting back to the surface.

At least he had the bright idea to change into swim trunks before coming there.

Bless him.

“You,” he scowled, hair dripping all over his face as his two friends were laughing their asses off, “I swear to God you both are dead.”

“Oh, c’mon, don’t say you didn’t expect it,” Arthur snorted, hands falling to his hips.

Lucas lifted himself up onto the edge of the pool in a splash of water, warily accepting the hand Basile landed him. “Astonishingly enough I thought that we were between civilized people. My mistake,” he groaned as he grumpily fistbumped them hello, before going to see the girls.

Only Nola and Manon were there, but he wasn’t surprised since Emma had already been told by the girls herself that Daphné, Alexia and Imane were held back in some shopping session but had promised to run back to the hotel as soon as possible. Yann’s girlfriend-turned-fiancée had been a part of the group for almost two years now, and since she didn’t have a weird obsession with how hot Eliott and Lucas getting it on together would be — Arthur’s ex had one of those and Lucas had wanted to strangle her more times he could count — she had been welcomed to stay. She and Yann had met up through Imane, both working as interns in the same hospital, so it had been easy from there, Lucas could only guess.

“Consider yourself lucky,” Manon pointed out from her spot on one of the deckchairs, closing the book she was reading as she pushed up her sunglasses, “you’ll never have to worry about keeping a wedding dress clean for a whole day with these two around.”

Next to her, Nola paled. “Oh please no.”

“Already talking about wedding dresses but I don’t see any ring yet,” Arthur snickered.

Nola grinned. “My fiancé couldn’t wait to propose, I guess? We’re gonna go shopping when we get back home.”

Lucas turned to Yann with a shocked expression. “Who does that?”, he scoffed.

They were at the beginning of their relationship. Lucas didn’t know much himself about functioning relationships but he could only guess that technically those kinds of inadvertent dick moves happened later down the road, usually.

Yann looked a bit sheepish. “I wanted her to pick something she likes,” he mumbled. “She’s gonna wear it after all.”

“Didn’t you pick your wedding suit for your dad’s second marriage, like, two days prior or something?” Basile quipped.

“I didn’t want to go,” he grumbled. “That’s different.”

“I don’t think any of us particularly wanted you to livestream us the whole thing but I guess we all take one for the team, uh?” Eliott casually chimed in, joining him on the edge of the pool and letting his long legs dangle in the water.

Since Lucas was mature, and a very functioning adult at that, he stuck his tongue out as a response.

“It’s too bad we’re only here for the weekend,” Eliott complained with a sigh as he flopped down onto Emma’s bed. “Remember those three weeks after your BAC?”

Lucas snorted as he kept rummaging through his travel bag, squatting at the foot of his bed. He hadn’t wanted to take everything out but now he was starting to rethink his decision as he exhumed a wrinkled denim button down. Daphné, Basile, Eliott, Yann, Nola, Imane and him had gone out for lunch in a restaurant nearby, while the rest was dispersed in the city to do some shopping, then everyone had flocked back to the hotel and they had spent the better part of the afternoon by the pool occasionally trying to drown each other when they were mostly alone, on the seventh floor. It was the coolest thing Lucas had ever seen. It wasn’t so much that he had never seen something like that before, but he just had a thing for climbing and rooftop activities — back in Paris he had specifically chosen his new flat according to whether or not he had access to the one of his building. And well, also if he could afford it or not, but that was another story.

“We were young and wild and free,” Lucas commented dramatically.

He eventually set the shirt down, before grabbing his travel bag and emptying all of its content on his bed. It wasn’t like Eliott of all people would bat an eye at his calvin kleins. He reached for a pair of black pants finally standing out on the white comforter now that they weren’t lost in the deep end of the bag.

“I’d pick the black shirt,” Eliott said casually.

Lucas quirked a brow at him. “You just say that because it’s the one you bought me.”

Eliott grinned, making his eyes crinkle. “Well, yeah. Precisely,” he said, shrugging a little.

“I’m not going to dress all black, that’s right up your alley,” Lucas quipped.

“I’m trying to bring a little bit more colors, if you must know,” Eliott retorted, tugging at the hem of his light grey tank top as if it was a proof that it was a color. “Besides, the jeans you had this morning were fine, and they would look even finer with the black shirt. Who bought them for you?”

Lucas pondered the question and considered telling him to fuck off, but instead he just sighed. “Manon,” he grumbled, and Eliott started laughing like an asshole. Which was kind of sweet, but vaguely irritating. Lucas glared at him. “Someday I’ll claim back my closet, and you and Manon will finally stop dressing me up like I’m some sort of baby doll.”

“Wrong choice of words on every level.” The bastard smirked cheekily, regardless of the unimpressed look Lucas sent him. “Plus, we dress you up because you’d still be wearing sweatpants to your dates if it weren’t for us meddling in.”

“You’re admitting you’re meddling in, we’re getting at it,” Lucas bit back haughtily.

“Just admit I care about you, you little shit,” Eliott snorted.

Lucas cocked an eyebrow. “What did we say about size jokes?”

“It was a term of endearment,” Eliott protested, sitting up on Emma’s bed and leaning back his weight onto his hands.

It cruelly emphasized the veins on his arms and the sun was shimmering onto his skin and the tattoos he had on the underside of his arm. Not afraid? Not afraid. It had been a recurring joke between them when they were younger (a lifetime ago) and someday Eliott had snapped and just gotten it inked for good. Lucas had almost chocked himself when he had seen it on Instagram.

“And I’m feeling so endeared right now.”

Eliott flipped him off and Lucas chuckled. “Who are you rooming with anyway?”

“Arthur,” Eliott said casually. “Why, needed me to brush your hair?”

“Not really, but who’s gonna read me stories about hedgehogs and raccoons?” Lucas deadpanned.

“Hilarious,” Eliott deadpanned with the same voice.

Lucas laughed and went to push open the bathroom door, then stopped halfway and turned back. “Hey, I was meaning to ask. You still have the address of the tattoo parlor where you got those?”, he asked, gesturing at Eliott’s tattoos with his chin.

Eliott glanced down at his arms, a little bit lost, then he grinned. “No way, you’re gonna get one? After all this time?”

Lucas huffed and shrugged. “Dunno. Maybe? I’ve been thinking, you know. So you still have it or not?”

“Yeah, no problem,” Eliott smiled with a nod. “I’ll send it to you. They’ve got an Instagram page and all, no bad surprise.”

“Nice,” he nodded, almost to himself.

“What are you thinking about getting?” Eliott asked, curious. “If you don’t mind me asking, of course.”

Lucas pondered the question. “It’s not really- I don’t know, I was thinking about maybe getting something about my mom, but it sounds- I don’t know it seems kinda stupid.”

He scrunched his nose, mostly to himself. Now Eliott was gonna imagine him with a real-size portrait of his dead mom tattooed on his chest or something equally weird. All he had thought about so far was something small and rather casual, like a date or something no bigger than that. He had debated for months about it, thinking that it was maybe a bit hypocritical — after all he hadn’t really been the best son towards the end and he still had to live with a sense of relief that had washed over him after she had passed, before the actual pain could settle in — but now he considered that it didn’t mean he couldn’t honor his mom anyway simply because she wasn’t there anymore.

“It’s not stupid if it means something to you,” Eliott said.

Lucas huffed a laugh, which was his number 1 reaction whenever he had shared too much and just wanted it to stop. “Yeah, well, I’m just thinking, you know? Plenty of time for me to chicken out.”

“Not afraid. Remember?”

“Thank you Octavia Blake. I’ll remember that,” he snorted, pushing past the bathroom door.

Everything was fine, Lucas thought.

Absolutely, a hundred percent fine. He was fine. Yann was fine. Nola, Imane, Manon, Arthur, Basile, Daphné, Emma, Alexia were all fine. Eliott was fine. And the waiter who had been painstakingly hitting on him for the better part of the past hour was absolutely fine too.

They had all reunited at a bar down the street to get predrinks before hitting the clubs to celebrate, and Lucas was happy about it, he really was. Having all his friends gathered in one place and a free night to remember the good old times, what more could he ask, right? The third time Guillermo or Guz or whatever that stupid nametag read came around and eye-fucked Eliott without even the slightest hint of embarrassment, he genuinely thought he would burst though. The problem wasn’t that anyone was hitting on Eliott — water under the bridge and all — but it was rather that everyone seemed to find it the funniest thing on the goddamn planet.

Daphné certainly didn’t need another umbrella in her stupid cocktail.

Arthur didn’t need a refill.

And no one cared about the goddamn tapas and their fucking recipes.

As soon as the stupid waiter had gone back to the kitchen with a bright smile and a lingering look on Eliott, Emma leaned over the table. “He wants to give you the d so bad,” she grinned devilishly.

Eliott snorted and shook his head, leaning back against the backrest of his chair. “Maybe hookups at the back of a restaurant are your thing but they aren’t mine.”

Yann laughed, making his glass spin a little between his fingers. “Mr. Demaury’s a romantic, we been knew after all.”

“A romantic who’s single and isn’t getting any,” Emma commented, nose in her glass.

“That’s comforting, Emma, thank you.”

The table started laughing, but apparently Emma’s remark had sparked some interest in Daphné’s mind. Lucas knew something stupid would come out of it even before she opened her mouth — it wasn’t that she was stupid, it was just that this whole conversation was.

“She’s got a point,” she said thoughtfully. “You’re like one of the hottest guys I know, don’t tell me you’re still hung up on Macha.”

“Macha’s hot,” Alexia added, widening her eyes comically. “You guys were goals.”

Lucas almost snorted, but managed to hide it behind a coughing fit. Everyone knew that Eliott was bipolar, but he didn’t like to bring it up or to speak about it to all of them; in the end Lucas was generally the only one, sometimes along with Alexia or Basile whenever he needed advises, to know the extent of his low lows. The fact that at least one of Macha (her name was Marie-Charlotte, but beware to your nuts if you dared to call her that) and Eliott’s many breakups had been caused by a tantrum she had thrown because he wasn’t answering her texts fast enough, when he had already made a supreme effort to write her, with words, that he wasn’t feeling alright at the moment, was one of the things that only Lucas knew, and sometimes he wished he could share this information and the resentment towards her without betraying Eliott’s trust.

It was a tough balance to maintain, but he was managing it most of the time.

“Yeah, well. Macha’s busy these days,” Eliott shrugged. “It just wasn’t working with her in Berlin and me in Paris anyway. We’re both better apart.”

“Maybe we should try to set you up instead of trying to set up Lulu,” Basile said. “That’d make for a nice change.”

“I’ve never asked anybody to set me up,” Lucas scoffed.

“My bestman isn’t going to attend my wedding as a single man,” Yann retorted. “If by then you don’t have anybody to rock your nights, I’ll have to provide.”

“You wish you could, Cazas.”

On the other side of the table, Eliott grinned at him with a knowing look. “Spikey much, uh?”

Lucas rolled his eyes and downed his drink when he saw the waiter come back to their table with something they hadn’t even ordered, everyone holding back their breath with conspirator looks.

The first club they went to had a fifteen meters queue spilling outside the entrance and the slowest bouncer of the century. It took him an infinite amount of time to decide whether or not the group of five boys at the top of the line should be let in, before eventually deciding to ask them for their IDs. They all pretended to fumble for a while — or maybe they truly were this intoxicated already, hence why reaching for one of the four pockets of their jeans was so hard in the first place. In the meantime, Lucas was repressing the urge of constantly rolling his eyes by chatting away with Alexia and Eliott, until both got hooked by two girls (Dutch, apparently) from the group behind them. It wasn’t like he could really blame them. Eliott was Eliott, and Alexia radiated the cool vibe every single breath she took. It was rather the feeling of being left out that he resented always a little bit more than he was supposed to, and not just because people were hitting on Eliott.

Why should he care, after all?

If Eliott had game, he was happy for him.

Okay, maybe he was a bit upset. For the first time in forever they both happened to be single at the same time, and thus had no one clinging onto them for attention. This time, Lucas was clingy. Problem was, Eliott was one of those people who could fall in love with a doorknob, and when it was paired with good looks and good personality, celibacy wasn’t bound to be Eliott’s strong suit, and up until now Lucas’ theory had been pretty much verified. With a huff to himself he lost interest in trying to keep up with the conversation with the Dutch girls. On his other side, Daphné and Basile were happily sucking faces, which kept grossing Lucas out even after all these years, so he sidestepped them to reach Nola, Imane and Manon and finally find civilized people to talk to.

When they got inside, the club was packed, the walls thrumming to the beat of the music, the air stuffed and the bartenders busy for a while. Arthur, Manon and him lost a few more minutes of their time, trying to get their attention for drinks, while everyone was flocking into a booth somewhere on the side of the dancefloor. Apparently it was vodka night, a weird mix that made the drinks a blue as icy as the neon lights spread everywhere around the club. Two of those helped him relax and enjoy the night, and from his spot in the nearly desert booth his friends had managed to get a grip on, he could see them dancing the night away. Yann and Nola were giggling stupidly while doing those sickeningly couple dance moves, Alexia was busy making out with one of the Dutch girls from before, and Eliott was laughing with some girl in a corner, her extra-long, extra-straight hair cascading to her hips Ariana Grande style.

He blamed it on Emma’s insistence during their flight, on the drinks he already had, on the colors of the neon lights, but suddenly he was sixteen again, and he was kissing Chloé until he jaws hurt, while his eyes were desperately glued to Eliott’s as if he needed those stormy grey pools to breathe. What was that party called again?

Right. Kiffance.

What a joke.

He had only scarce memories of the second club, probably because it was not all that different from the first one. The third one, however, was in one of those underground locations that tried so hard to look grunge and hipstery — not like he minded. He was on whatever beverage Basile and Arthur had deemed fit for the occasion, and it tasted a bit weird and was strangely colorless, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as what he feared at fist. The floor swayed a little when he got up, but it was a fun feeling that made him giggle for almost nothing. He felt warm and fuzzy and his accent in English had gotten so thick that he wasn’t sure anyone could get a single word anymore, but it didn’t seem to put off the guy who had pressed him up against the wall a while ago, and who was slowly climbing his way in the top 5 of the best kissers Lucas had come across in a long time. He was kinda hot too, the kind Lucas wouldn’t mind letting in his pants. In their booth, the boys were apparently cheering on him for some reason, and Yann raised his glass to him, making Lucas huffing a little breathy laugh between wet kisses.

When the guy reached for him to drag him in a more secluded corner, he followed suit.

For some reason though, the memory of a pretty brunette with bangs and a chirpy voice stuck at the back of his head while they walked around the dancefloor.

What time was it? He had no idea. All he knew was that, while he was making his way back towards the booth after maybe or maybe not giving a blowjob, ‘fuck yes’ was the answer he had given when Arthur had come across him with the promise of some fresh air and some weed. Like the good old times. The air hit him in the face as they got outside through the back door, a welcomed kick he didn’t know he needed that made his head spin a little. They settled against some sort of railing, taking a hit every now and then.

Emma showed up at some point, and Lucas vaguely heard something along the lines of the girls minus Daphné going back to the hotel, and Arthur probably needing to find a place to crash because she was sure she had seen Eliott leave with someone.

Lucas handed the joint to her then went back inside. There was probably some room left in his system for another drink.

There was some room left for one, but probably not for three. The fact that the ground now swayed dangerously should have disqualified him from dancing, but the beat was just so alluring and the movement of the other people helped him steady himself and follow — to a certain degree. People and faces and neon lights kept printing themselves a second too long in his brain each time he blinked.

He tripped over his own feet in the stairs leading up to the street, nearly falling face first in a fit of giggles. The others were lost to the crowd, for those who still remained at least, and his mind kept skipping what looked like a frame every now and then.

Wow, what the fuck, you okay? The voice was familiar. French? Maybe. He didn’t know, and suddenly the brick wall next to him grew alarmingly close.

Fuck he was gonna regret this. A giggle burst out of him.

Lucas cracked his eyes open with the feeling of rising up from the dead. His brain was fuzzy and his throat dry as a desert, and if there weren’t many pleasant occasions on which those two things gathered at the same time, this one was definitely not one of those. He found himself staring at the void, eyelids heavy, for at least good minute. The blinds hadn’t been shut at all, and apparently all the sunlight in the world had decided to flood in this particular room in order to make his eyeballs melt. With a wince at the pounding headache, he closed his eyes and tried to swallow down some saliva. Which, in fact, wasn’t that good of an idea. Lucas winced some more in disgust at the bad taste, curling a little bit on himself. The question was now how much courage he had left to get up, for a total of three minutes, just enough to grab a glass of water he’d probably apply first thing on his forehead, then go to the bathroom to relieve his bladder from all the liquid he had the night before. Good plan. Good. Plan. That was a good plan, Lucas thought sluggishly. The major flaw was that he didn’t know if his stomach would make it.

Said stomach started gurgling and Lucas felt a chill run up his spine.

Okay. The bladder would wait. It would. He squeezed his eyes shut, digging his face deeper in his pillow. Fuck. How many fucking drinks did he have? He hadn’t had a black-out since college, and now he was starting to remember why he had stopped pushing himself to the breaking point.

Because it fucking sucked afterwards.

A quiet huff echoing in the room and a movement on the other side of the bed made his eyes snap back open, the mattress dipping a little bit.

Oh no.

Oh no, no, no.

He forced his last two surviving braincells to connect together, but his mind was blank. All he could hear was the birds chirping aggressively outside, a few cars passing down the street and someone walking outside the room, feet digging into the thick carpet.

Thomp, thomp, thomp.

He didn’t remember hooking up with anybody. Let alone bringing them back to the hotel afterwards. That being said he didn’t remember much at all in the first place. He tried to scan his memory for any available clue but the only that came to his mind was Yann happily cheering on him for some reason, a very colored cocktail he didn’t remember the name of and-

Oh. Yeah.

He had hooked up with someone. Some guy. In a club.

Now he recalled. He also recalled getting down on his knees and he humfed to himself.

Yeah. Great. He didn’t dare to move now. It wasn’t his first one night stand, don’t get him wrong. He had had his share of those. But rarely ever with a hangover of this magnitude. Fuck he wasn’t in the right state to have the awkward morning after talk. No matter if the guy was all casual about it — they lived in two different countries and Lucas was literally there for two days, it wasn’t like something else would happen anyway. It still felt impossibly awkward regardless and the prospect of dealing with it didn’t help his already unsteady stomach. Particularly when he couldn’t get out. Because it was his room, right? Lucas squinted his eyes. It must be. Who else’s would it be?

It didn’t make sense. He spared a glance around. The armchair in the corner. The table aligned against the wall. The commode with a small tv screen. He could make up the dark shape of a building towering outside, across from the street.

It wasn’t his hotel room, Lucas thought.

Unless they had built whatever that building was last night.

He knew the hoodie thrown carelessly on the armchair though. And the sneakers near the foot of the bed. Heartbeat rising as realization downed on him, Lucas mustered enough courage to sit up, and after taking a deep breath, he turned his head to the other side of the bed, hands clutching at the sheets pooling low around his waist, where Eliott was still dead to the world.

#skam france #this one turned up longer than i thought #and a bit different?#i don't write like that usually i hope it's still good regardless #elu fic #mine #*#*tbom #lucas lallemant #eliott demaury #eluficrecs #elu

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queermequeeryou · 5 years

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XIV.

Rubi sat down and breathed deeply. “Qué pasó?” asked Blanca getting a similar position near her and putting hand on butch’s shoulder. “That was my mother. Angie was killed during trans rights movement manifestation. I’m shocked” suddenly, it has made Rubi felt like she was not able to inhale. Like something was pressuring on her head. Everything was too heavy now. However, it was all inside. No tear appeared on her face. She did not know how to cry and it was like that forever. She was struggling inside, never allowing people in. Blanca faced her and embraced. Rubi looked at her and kissed lady’s hands. “Thank you for being here. Could you go with me to Madrid, I have to see my mother and Ruby’s. Maybe, go to a funeral. I.. for a first time in my life it feels like it is too much. I don’t know why. I didn’t love her. Being honest, I think what I had towards her was sympathy. She was a close friend but she loved me, I know that. She loved me deeply all the time. Even after I met you and I started to behave strange, not appreciate her enough..” Rubi hid her face in her hands for a longer moment. “I wish I loved her the way she loved me. That was the problem. I couldn't force myself. She was perfect and she treated me so well. I couldn't offer her same thing. I was lying to myself, trying to believe love will come or that love is not that important or that it is love, I just have a wrong impression about what it is. When I met you though...” Rubi looked Blanca deep in the eyes and took her hair, then Rubi’s fingers caressed lady’s cheek. “I understood what is love. What is passion. How it really feels to be crazy for somebody. First, I tried to forget about it, then I thought that maybe after I will realize my sexual phantasies with you it will pass and I will be able to get back to my old life. It didn't happen. Instead, I found out I’m falling in love. Blanca, I love you” she said that in a serious tone, looking into that woman’s eyes. She smiled not leaving Rubi from her vision. “Rubi, you are a person I looked for all my life” said Blanca and after that, Rubi kissed her with desire and love. “I will go with you to Madrid and support you with everything you need”. Kisses continued. “If you also want, we can finish, pack and go there right away” she said while leading Blanca back to bed. She nodded and took off Rubi’s robe. However, she was quite surprise that after that news Rubi still wanted to go on. She realized that butch’s movements were stronger than usually, she did not say a thing, it turned her on more because usually she touched her with desire but more intensively than strong. When Blanca finished, Rubi let her lick her fingers. It was strong, releasing.

Few hours later they were dozing off but Rubi woke up and kissed Blanca’s shoulder. She felt it and also opened her eyes, then moved to be facing Rubi. The butch touched her hair, face and neck with affection. “You are not only terribly smart but also you look so beautiful I can’t believe it” said Rubi and gave Blanca a kiss between her collar-bones” Blanca laughed loudly which was very usual and charming of her. However, with Rubi she was not doing it for a while because it seemed like quite sarcastic way to react in formal situations or to flirt. However, without any doubts Rubi loved the sound of her laugh. Also her face, lips, wrinkles looked beautiful when she did it. “I will pack” said Rubi standing up from the bed. Blanca kissed her on the cheek. “Do you need help?” asked the lady. Rubi gave back the kiss. “No, love. I will be fine”. Blanca went on packing her stuff instead.

On the road, they were very silent. They were just holding hands. Smoking sometimes. Certainly also listening to Rubi’s cassette tapes.

When they arrived, it was an early morning but Dolores was up, probably for many hours because her coffee mug was suggesting that, also the general state of her workroom. She was probably painting all night after hearing about Angie’s death. They were very close. Rubi knocked on the door in a certain way she used to knock while visiting her there and after hearing low voice allowing her to enter, she went in holding Blanca by her hand. Dolores looked at them patiently. Rubi embraced her mother for a longer moment instead of any greeting. “This is my love, Blanca” she said after a moment. Dolores smiled and shook lady’s hand. “Nice to meet you. I’m Dolores. Rubi spoke about you very warmly. I’m glad to meet you, however not about the circumstances” she said and dried her painted hands in her apron unintentionally. Her hands were all with paint but it not wet anymore so she could not just wipe it out, it was her usual mechanical gesture. “I’m deeply sorry for your loss.” said Blanca meaning it “I’m also very thankful that we can be introduced to each other, doña Dolores” Lady looked at Rubi and she smiled. There was so much love in their eyes. “Coffee? I can’t cook but we can also make some scrambled eggs and sandwiches for breakfast” Dolores was very straight-forward, hippie type. Her days were filled with art, painting, friends and smoking weed. She did not care much about cooking and being a perfect house-wife.

Later, they were eating breakfast, drinking coffee and talking. About Angie, life, Seville, their relationship. Blanca excused them to go the toilet. “You know what, daughter?” said Dolores a moment after the lady left them. “Thank you for breaking up with Angélica. I know, you cared for her deeply. But you never loved her. You would be hurting her trying to lie to yourself, darling. Don’t feel guilty. I see it in your eyes when you look at Blanca. And the way she looks at you. That’s love, Rubi. Take care of it and be thankful. I’m glad to know you have somebody like each other”. Rubi sighed. “You were close with Angie, weren’t you? Dolores nodded. “We had same spirit. Free. Bold. Ambitious. Sometimes stupid. In your years I was exactly like Angie. Willing to change the world. We spent dozens of hours talking and smoking weed. She knew long before you told her. I think she knew long before you even. You were the love of her life, darling. At first we thought you have a depression, you were so closed but Angie knew. She told me, Dolores let her be, I’m her to support her and she still comes back to me so she is loyal even if she sleeps with somebody else. I want leave her.” Dolores looked at her painting and messaged her daughter’s shoulder.

Rubi and Blanca have decided to stay few days but they had to go back on Saturday to have the last rehearsals weekend before the premiere. They also thought they need to practice during the week. Angélica’s funeral was scheduled for the next day, two days after she was killed. That day, Angie’s father visited them. She was Dolores’ friend so they spent few hours talking when Rubi joined them. Blanca decided to stay in Rubi’s bedroom. “Don Guillermo” said Rubi and shook his hand politely. Their families were friends, she knew him for years. “My condolences”. Guillermo Echevarria knew about their break up but he was not upset. He thought they were both adults and families friendship was more important. He wanted to be loyal towards Rubi’s mother. They have always supported each other and he had strong feelings towards her.

In the evening, Guillermo still has not left. Rubi went back to her room to be with Blanca but she decided to go back to bring tea for them. She heard a talk in the kitchen. “These are not the good circumstances. We should let her know in a better way”. “But when? Honey, I want to go with you to a funeral. I want us to support each other. Let’s finally tell your daughter about our love”. Rubi was very surprised. She was not expecting that but also she had nothing against it. They realized she was there. “Rubi? I...” Dolores was a bit nervous. Rubi embraced her mother. “When you were together, Guillermo and I were not that close, we...” “You don’t need to explain to me anything, I’m happy for you” Rubi smiled to her mother and towards Guillermo as well. Dolores was very shocked but also happy. Rubi was glad her mother has had somebody like him around. It was very important, especially now.

They were sitting and smoking weed. In the same place were sometime ago, they did the same thing with Angie. It was like a katharsis. Everything was being cleaned and they were starting to work this out. Slowly.

#lesbian #story #lgbt #fuerzas de los abrazos #writer #queer

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evecoombs-blog · 5 years

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Eve's FMP About Beds!

I have chosen my subject area to be about beds. The reason I chose beds is that I was in Bath with my friends staying with them at university. I woke up from my sleep thinking about how reliant I was on this thing, a bed, and how I start and finish my day in the same place. This made me wonder how other people relate to their beds and whether they have ever questioned what it means to them, how it affects their life and how controlling it is of their lives. It also made me think about how I was sleeping on a blow-up mattress with a duvet and so that was a bed and therefore what is classified as a bed; is it just an area of comfort and why do we rely on it so much?

COMFORT OR A TRAP?

One year, when I was 14, except for school, I didn’t leave my house and spent most of my time sitting in bed. At the time, as a teenager, I was not wanting to speak to anyone, I wanted to isolate myself from everything around me. However, after some time the comfort disappeared and was replaced by a sense of disappointment in myself and sadness about the person I had become; someone who didn’t want to socialise with anyone. The bed became a trap – I thought it was a place of safety but it wasn’t safe as it made me feel I wasn’t living my life properly and made me confused about what I wanted to do or where I wanted to go. When I look back on that year, I think about what was going on in my mind and why was it that space that I chose to stay in? I think we see a bed as a sign of comfort but you can be in it too long and it can become uncomfortable, e.g. when people are bed-bound they can’t physical leave and the one thing they would want to do is leave and be anywhere else.

PERSONALITY

Tracey Emin’s bed also came to mind as I was thinking about how does your bed reflect your personality? It reflected her life at a point in time but did it actually reflect her real character? This made me think about what happens in a bed. You mainly use it for sleeping but what else happens? Obviously, sex happens but you eat in bed, you watch TV, you’re on the internet, etc. but have these things changed over generations and do they change through the different stages of your life. How much importance do these activities have at a given time?

HISTORY

Historically, beds and their usage are linked closely to the social norms of their time and have been used for different purposes. Privacy was not an issue in Medieval times when people shared large communal beds, made of a sack stuffed with straw and a cloak or blanket to cover you, with an etiquette about how you took your position in that bed. There are accounts that show that children would sleep on either side of the bed but when a wife did not want to have sex with her husband she would make the children move position and sleep in the middle of the bed separating her from her husband. There was a sleeping arrangement, known as bundling, when an unmarried young man and woman were allowed to sleep in the same bed – either tied down or with a board between them – to chat to each other to see if they liked one another enough to get married. This aloud you instead of your parents to choose who you would marry.

The Victorians moved away from sharing – and the social issues that brought with it – to creating a private sleeping area. A bed, in a wealthy home, was made up of many elements in the Victorian era – an iron bedstead, horsehair mattress, feather mattress, top and bottom sheet, blankets, eiderdowns, pillows and pillowcases – to create the most comfort. Servants were essential to make these elaborate beds, turn the mattresses daily, etc.

After the World Wars, the social system was destroyed and domestic service declined. People made their own beds and to facilitate this in the 1970s the Scandinavian duvet was introduced into our lives and a brought simplicity back to the bed.

PHYSICALITY

How is a bed made? Materially how is a bed made and how does this affect your experience with it? How do different materials affect your experience in a bed - a water bed, a bed made of jelly? After thinking about what makes a bed physically, I also thought about why are they always in bedrooms? Why can’t you have a bed in a park and would people feel uncomfortable with a bed outside the bedroom? A bed is an intimate thing so how would it feel making it open to the public.

We think of a bed as an everyday object but it plays a key role in how we sleep and, so, how effectively our bodies repair themselves through sleep. This also makes me think about how hospital beds are designed – are they designed to help repair the body through sleep or are they designed purely to facilitate medical needs only?

Does having a bed matter and, if so, why? Is there a sense of freedom not knowing where you are going to finish or start your day or do we need the security of the known?

Could a perfect bed be made for certain types of people, e.g. hermit, traveller, light sleeper, sexually driven person, insomniac, etc.? Or is there a universal bed that would suit everyone? What would be the worse bed you could make?

How does a bed physically vary from country to country and how is this a reflection of the society?

CULTURE AND ENVIRONMENT

Geographically beds reflect the natural elements of a country and its culture.

America – Massive beds demonstrating the wealth/greed and feeling of world dominance of Americans. Some beds are called Cesar or Emperor beds as they are 12ft long. This is reflected in Rihanna’s lyrics : ‘In this California King bed we are a thousand miles apart’.

South America – hammock – originally made from Hamack tree bark – protect sleeper from snakes and other poisonous animals.

Africa – first humans thought to have evolved – 77,000 years ago – evidence of sleeping mats from plants – so we have been looking for the perfect bed for thousands of years. Always have nets around their beds because of mosquitoes – its about staying alive whilst sleeping.

A Manji in SE Asia is their traditional bed - consists of a wooden frame and ropes – complete simplicity.

China – a Kang bed-stove for the whole family – large brick or clay platform with interior cavities which spreads heat from the stove to keep it warm and the whole family sleep together on it.

Japan – futons – occupy the entire room – tatami on the floor first – a mat made of rice straws on top of compressed woodchip boards, thin mattress on top of this (can be folded up to optimise storage). Large population with little living space.

Norway – ice beds.

ARTISTS

I am interested in some artists who have used the bed in their work to evoke the psychological aspect of sleep and, through their absence, reflect on the traces of those who have slept there.

Janine Antoni: Slumber 1994

In this work the artist is looking at how the unconscious mind can create art. Between 1994 and 2000, the artist slept while an electroencephalograph machine recorded her eye movement. During the day, Antoni would sit at the loom and weave shreds of her nightgown in the pattern of her REM. The patterns were woven into the blanket that covered the bed as she slept at night. Her dreams were turned into a sculpture.

Urs Fischer has created several beds that reflect his themes of tension and instability. Some have buckled under pressure and others because of the material used. There is an invisible force creating this pressure. Untitled (Soft Bed) 2011

Rachel Whiteread: Untitled (Air Bed 1992

Whitread makes casts of everyday objects, usually showing a negative form but in this unusual case she is showing a positive cast of a bed. She has two consistent themes of comfort from objects in our daily live together with bodily absence and death in her body of work. She is interested in the human traces left on the bed and the memory of this and how this highlights absence or death.

Guillermo Kuitca: Untitled (1992)

Kuitca uses maps in his work to evoke a memory, dream or personal history. In this work the mattresses represent home and sleep but the maps represent the non-physical, the emotional element absorbed from those who have slept on the mattresses.

STARTING POINTS

Potential starting points for me would, therefore, be: how people relate to and use their beds; how beds control our lives; what makes the perfect/imperfect bed; what is the purpose of having a bed; how does the material of a bed affect your experience in it; how does a bed reflect different societies; how does it affect our health and when does a bed become too comfortable; how is your psychological state affected by the bed you sleep in?

WHAT CAN I DRAW ON FROM MY OWN EXPERIENCE?

I chose an everyday object for my FMP because when I did my mugs project I realised how everyday objects that we don’t think that much about really impact our life subconsciously: the relationship we have with the object; the emotion it creates; how it influences the way we live. We use them for a functional purpose but don’t realise the emotional benefits that they can bring. For example, I realised that in conversation we use them to block out awkward silence; we use them to release tension by tapping or moving a mug; when we drink from them they can be calming and pleasurable as they deliver a warm, comforting drink. They also demonstrate dead giveaways about your personality: the way in which you hold the mug; the mug you choose; where you leave them; what you choose to drink from them. I have also looked at other everyday objects in a similar way: food, buses, coffee, shoe laces.

I can envisage using many of the techniques and materials that I have worked with so far including 3D design, film and photography.

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romancevsreality-blog · 6 years

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vanderpump rules, season six, episode two: three cheers for jax’s taco bell sweater!

I was fully prepared to write a whole long opener for this but then as soon as I did my computer was like “lololol suck it” and restarted. I had literally written one word and now I am enraged so let’s just get it poppin, daddy.

We open back at Scheana’s birthday party, and Schwartz is like, “My instinct is to protect Jax,” and Sandoval is like, “I gave him a heads up.” These boys are so loyal to Jax and Jax will shit all over their parties as soon as he can if it helps his bottom line. Jax is the absolute worst and these boys are simultaneously the worst (less Tom Sandoval than Schwartz) for protecting him1.

Meanwhile, Kristen is butting her head in where it doesn’t belong (#ClassicKristen) and trying to get Faith to talk to talk to her. Jax also doesn’t understand why he’s being “attacked” for “somehthing he didn’t do.” Faith says she has proof that she’s telling the truth and that Jax made all of these false promises to her about leaving Brittany and being with her.

Lisa reminds us that most of the stories we hear about Jax turn out to be true. For some reason, Jax doesn’t understand why Brittany is so quick to believe someone else’s story. Kristen’s pissed because Brittany’s easily the best thing that’s happened to - really, to any of the people in that group because Brittany at least seems to have a soul and Jax left his in a basement in Miami in 1879. He’s not allowed home, at least for now.

Scheana goes to have a shot with The Toms, DJ James Kennedy, J.D., and Jax Taylor, who literally looks like the bloated corpse of Hugh Hefner in his velvet suitjacket. Sandoval is vehemently defending Jax, saying there’s no proof that Jax did or did not sleep with Faith and it’s not fair to say he did. Jax is like, “I’m not going to chase Brittany down the street”, and Scheana tells him no, that’s a good idea.

I mean, as someone who has been chased after by a love interest both romantically and maliciously, I... just don’t do it? Scheana says that if she and the girls find out this rumor is true, they’re going to go Lorena Bobbitt on Jax.2

James revealed that Faith missed her period, and Jax is pissed. Those kind of lies ruin people’s lives but also, so does behaving as if your actions have zero consequences, JAX.

The next day, we’re at Villa Rosa, where Lisa Vanderpump’s car broker has arrived. I want to be the kind of rich where my car broker just pops in for tea like it ain’t no thang. Ken’s treated Lisa to a Rolls Royce that she’s apparently hinted to to Ken for a while then. Stassi rolls up like, “I literally don’t have air conditioning in my apartment and here you are getting a Rolls Royce on a Tuesday.” I agree with Stassi and now that she’s my Worst Enemy I hate myself for it3.

Stassi’s come over to meet with Lisa because she’s interested in getting into event planning as a career. She’s come to Lisa for advice because Lisa seems to know what she’s doing, and she needs a reason to get back to Sexy Unique Restaurant that isn’t working there. Lisa likes the fact that Stassi has a je ne sais quoi and gives her a chance to decorate and plan for Guillermo’s party. I know we talked about how Patrick and Stassi are back together, but even Lisa knows it’s not a good idea for them to be back together. Lisa’s like, “Why wouldn’t you get back with Jax?”

Y’all know I am pro-Jax and Stassi.

Lisa asks what it is about Jax that Brittany and Stassi can’t stay away from, and Stassi reminds us that he’s charismatic and manipulative and is such a people pleaser that he’ll say exactly what you want to hear, regardless of the truth. I really think that’s Jax’s inherent problem - he’s such a people pleaser while simultaneously being a narcissist. He wants everyone to like him so much he’ll say anything to get them on his side or get their attention - I mean, Stassi and Lisa are talking about him and he’s not even there - but when all of his lies come to a head it’s everyone else’s fault and not his. We get a great montage of Lisa pointing out that Stassi and Brittany were treated the exact same way by Jax. Stassi sadly thinks that Brittany’s better to Jax than she was, and Lisa reminds her that Stassi loved Jax just as much as Brittany does and regardless of that - it doesn’t make the way Jax treats them alright. We’re allowed to be just as mad for Stassi as we are for Brittany.

I’m sad they kind of blew past this, because I’ve always thought that was interesting. Stassi was the villain in the first season because she was the Woman Scorned and she wasn’t the nicest in general so it was okay for Jax to treat her like shit, especially after the way she treated Laura-Leigh. I think Stassi’s internalized a lot of that, and it’s now manifesting itself in her relationship with Patrick. She allows him to treat her like shit over and over again because everyone around her made it seem like that was okay before, so why wouldn’t it be okay now?

Stassi makes me sad. I don’t think she intends to do harm, I really don’t. I just think she’s naive, book-smart, and desperate to come across a way that she really isn’t.

Katie’s picking up a bunch of Miller Lite cans around her apartment and every time I see that spray-painted BUBBA canvas I want to scream. Everything about Katie feels like a Pinterest fail, including her personality4. Brittany’s knocking on the door and comes in with no makeup so you know she’s sad and mad. Brittany’s embarrassed because realistically - why did Jax do this with one of their friends, and who else has he done it with that she doesn’t know about? It’s sad because it seems like that’s the part she’s truly angry about - he cheated with someone she knows - and not the fact that Jax cheated in general5. She had a feeling he’s cheated, even found someone else’s fake eyelashes on the counter6. Everyone’s truly baffled and this proves that if Jax will cheat on Brittany of all people, he’ll cheat on anyone.

As if we didn’t know that already. Jax would cheat on a broom with a dustpan if that’s where his sexual predelictions lied. Brittany’s bought a ticket to Vegas, she’s gonna hang out with her friend from childhood, and she’s gonna party like a single girl with a reality show does in Vegas (aka: for free). Snaps to you, Brittany. Let the fake boobs breathe and get some creepy dudes to buy you overpriced drinks in a loud nightclub with dancers with eyes so dead and hair so long you’re genuinely concerned for their well being and then binge the next morning on a $50 unlimited buffet that never seems to end. I really love Vegas.

Oh, shit. Jax arrives at Katie’s7. Awkward. Brittany can’t even look at him and Jax is like, “why are you believing this?” She asks to see his phone, and clearly he’s cleared out his texts - WE’VE SEEN HIM DO THIS BEFORE - and it doesn’t prove anything. Jax remains defiant that He Has Done More For Brittany Than She Has For Him as always, and she’s done. She says she hates him in a way that seems so real and genuine I can’t handle it. If it’s fake, someone give Brittany a god damn Emmy.

We’re at PUMP, where Raquel and James have come to meet with Lisa. Racquel’s wearing the shortest of shorts and Lisa of course points them out first thing. Raquel’s gotten some new colored contacts that make her frighteningly catlike8 and she’s interested in working at Vanderpump Dogs. Doesn’t she know cats and dogs are the major enemy of the animal kingdom?! Lisa’s like, “so what do you do?” and because Raquel is a college student, she doesn’t know how to answer any questions other than, “How are you?” and “What are you studying?” The first time anyone asked me what I ‘did’ I was baffled by the entire notion of people not being in college.

Raquel is apparently a model and also is studying Kinesiology, something Lisa is a little impressed by. Raquel’s probably better off volunteering and dressing appropriately at Vanderpump Pups9 than actually working there. There’s more shit picking-up than shit stirring there.

Oh, and James is there to beg for his job back. Lisa was so proud until that moment because she thought James was there for Raquel but GUESS NOT. James is given a trial on Tuesday, which is more than he deserves, tbh. But again, these people have to be working in order for this show to remain about its central source: Lisa Vanderpump Promoting Her Restaurants.

It’s Ariana’s brother Jeremy’s birthday, and I cannot be bothered to care. We see Peter for the first time this season and he’s with Tom Schwartz who pulls into first place for My #1 Most Hated in this episode by whinging about how he misses Katie. I don’t miss her. It’s the second birthday in 12 hours that Katie wasn’t invited to and isn’t that TELLING? Tom’s pretty wasted and it’s not a good look on him at all. Jeremy’s moved into Tom and Ariana’s apartment again and this time, it hasn’t killed their sex life because their sex life was already dead to begin with.

James is shocked that Faith isn’t coming, because it’s not like anyone there is pissed off at her. Everyone’s in pretty much agreement: Faith fucked up, but it takes two to tango, Jax.

Brittany heads back over to her apartment with Jax and starts packing her things. Holy shit, their apartment has a set of stairs up into their bedroom. I would like that in my life, please. Brittany’s rearing and ready to go for Round 2, asking Jax if he fucked in their bed. And then, holy shit:

Jax admits to having sex with Faith.

Oh my god.

Oh my god!!!!

Y’all, I’m not even shocked he did it.

I’m genuinely shocked that he didn’t do the Jax Special: deny it, gaslight the shit out of Faith and Brittany, drag it out for half of the season, and then spend the other half begging for forgiveness to get it in the season finale.

I mean, we all know what Jax is doing at this point. He so badly wants out of this relationship but he refuses to break up with Brittany because he knows that he’ll be the bad guy who broke the sweet girl’s heart, so he continues over and over to fuck up in hopes that she’ll break down and dump him. He always fucks up and says “I understand if you want to break up with me.” Every time. EVERY TIME!!!! He constantly talks about her looks, her work ethic, her desperation in his talking heads. He embarasses himself and her in front of her family and in front of their friends. And now: he cheats on her, which is his last resort. But she refuses to give up because she knows what he has with him is more than without him, and he doesn’t want to deal with the social ostracization that would come with him breaking up with her at this point.

Jax cheated when Brittany and him were having a hard time, and even though that’s not what you should do, Jax did it anyway because he’s a god damn monster. He doesn’t have a good excuse, and then you realize that the sweater he was wearing over the polo is a god damn TACO BELL SWEATSHIRT AND I CAM CRYING LAUGHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The editors of this show are my favorite people.

Lisa is being honored at Long Beach Pride, and the Toms and Ariana are going to support Lisa because they have to make sure that Lisa knows they support her. Basically, they’re going to kiss ass. They’re all still baffled by the notion of Jax cheating on Brittany, and James is like, “Faith told me they didn’t use a condom and she missed her period.” That’s when Tom Sandoval does a complete 180 and flips - JAX IS LITERALLY 1000 YEARS OLD. Jax has literally used every single type of birth control ever created on the planet and he does not understand the basic idea of using a FREAKING condom.

There are far many more black people at Jeremy’s birthday than I ever expected and I honestly want a webseries about the black people of Vanderpump Rules now more than ever.

James and Kristen apparently talked last night, and Schwartz is both wasted and being a tattletale. He goes to talk to Jax about how everyone is gossiping about him and Tom Schwartz starts crying. He’s wasted, and he’s realizing that he has no drive. He’s under new pressures - marriage, a future family, and he’s feeling it for real. Tom Sandoval gets my award for Favorite Person in this episode when he tells Schwartz that he is lucky and blessed to have him as a friend and that he’s excited to open this bar with him.

I’m not crying, you’re crying.10

Brittany’s sobbing and on the phone with her mom. She tells her that he admitted to cheating and her mom just sounds like she’s trying to feel bad for her. Jax watches Brittany get into her Uber to the airport fromt the balcony in his Taco Bell sweatshirt and it’s so dramatic but untintenitonally hilarious because of that sweatshirt.

We’re at Long Beach Gay Pride, and Lisa is wearing a white jumpsuit with a cape, so she’s beeng oing through my pinterest board, which is 90% jumpsuits with capes. Lisa is Grand Marshall of their parade, and she’s emotional. Tom and Ariana flag Lisa down and she stops and is like, “Where’s Schwartz?”

He’s pooping. The least surprising thing ever.

Tom Sandoval has a glorious glitter highlight and Schwartz starts straight in with defending Jax and feeling bad that Jax is at home crying to himself on the couch alone. Lisa shuts that shit right down and tells him he’s going to look like a fool if he wants to be on Jax’s side. They’re happy he admitted to it, and Lisa is just hopeful Brittany dumps him 5ever.

One of the rare things in life I didn’t realize I needed was Lisa Vanderpump going to a leather tent. Tom Sandoval decides to get flogged by Ariana to hopefully get some of their issues out via BDSM. Every conversation has devolved back to Jax and Brittany - Lisa asks where Brittany is now, and Tom Schwartz is certain they’re going to get back together because Jax just can’t help himself. Ariana calls bullshit on that and so do I, especially when Schwartz tries to claim it’s in his DNA to be a manwhore.

Cheating is prevalent in Jamaican culture and the burden is always placed on the woman, it’s never then man’s choice to cheat. They’ll justify it with the bible and with science and whatever logic they need to but the truth is, it’s just not right. If you really can’t avoid your carnal urges don’t pull other people into it.

Tom and Tom both tell Lisa they love her and they’re just passionate and enthusiastic about what’s to happen with TomTom, and maybe that comes across as little too much at times. Lisa admits what’s true - she doesn’t need the for their expertise, just for their vibes and general essence. She wants them to help curate a cocktail menu and create an ambiance but leave the design to her.

How many restaurants has Lisa Vanderpump opened?

How many restaurants have Schwartz & Sandoval opened?

I rest my case.

Kristen has arrived at Stassi’s apartment and immediately starts shopping Stassi’s closet, something I do whenever I arrive at a new place after asking if you have any La Croix. No, I don’t want a glass of water11. Stassi’s getting ready for dinner with Patrick and she’s nervous. She’s obsessively putting her hair back because he like it when her hair is pushed back. This is already making me so sad. Kristen is basically staring at Stassi the way Jennifer Jason Leigh looked at Bridget Fonda in Single White Female.

Stassi talks about how she didn’t want to be judged for going back to Patrick after they broke up so she didn’t tell anyone, but she’s thrilled to be back with him. Considering we already know that he broke up with her on their anniversary, this is all so depressing. Especially when Kristen’s like “I’m already planning Stassi and Patrick’s wedding!!!”

Patrick comes over and...

Wait, what?

That’s what Patrick looks like?

No. No. NO! Nonononono.

You’re telling me Stassi left this show for a greasy red-faced coke bloated guy who chose man bun in 2017?!?!?!?!?!@?!?!?!

I AM HAVING A MELTDOWN.

I want to die. Stassi likes him becuase he’s straight out of Game of Thrones and I am gagging. No.

Scheana and Ariana are at work, and Brittany’s returned from her vacation with my favorite revenge look - refreshed and glowing.

Amanda’s Favorite Revenge Looks:

Hydrated, refreshed, good-night-of-sleep, lit from within “I’m not affected at all”

Full glam, tits out for the girls, eyelashes, painted for the gods realess - this is saved for major events

“Oh, I just happen to look this good on a day when I just happen to run into you at this annual party we’ve attended before together”

Brittany had a great time in Vegas, but she’s still going through it emotionally. Scheana tries to be like “I totally know, I was just there,” BIIIIIITCH you were dating Rob five seconds after Shay moved out. Brittany was grossed out by everyone in Vegas despite going there to party like a single girl and like Brittany... did you forget you’re in a relationship with Jax Taylor? Like, Vegas guys are gross, but he’s a decaying specimen dripping venom and STD sludge on everything he touches. She just wants to be alone for a bit and she’s gonna go to work and focus. Because Brittany is smart.

Stassi dressed for Patrick that night, and he’s happy. She asks if he she looks like a skank and he’s like, “Definitely.” Patrick starts immediately questioning Stassi’s ability to be an event planner becuase she’s never done it and knows nothing about it but somehow managed to convince Lisa that she could. When she mentions that his podcast makes her feel insecure about her podcast12, and he condescends to her by using bigger words than she knows like “juggernaut”. Patrick’s going to Amsterdamn without Stassi and he’s like, “Hey, I was without you for eight months, six days ain’t shit.” He doesn’t really let her speak, he just kind of talks AT her - “What lesson did we learn? The lesson is don’t talk when you’re apart and when you get back together, don’t talk about what happened when you were apart.” Stassi want so badly for this to work this time - if you get back together after dating for three years and breaking up for almost a year, it’s embarrassing if it doesn’t work out in the end. Patrick’s freaked out by all of this. She fully says that if Patrick tried to break up with her that she’d be like, “Nope, not happening.” He thinks people don’t realize how crazy she is, and he has no idea.

Jax shows up to work not in uniform - he’s wearing a navy shirt - and Ariana and Tom bought a whip. Of course Tom is turned on by Ariana with a whip, Tom just seems like the type to be turned on when Ariana takes a breath and I love that about him. Jax is probably going to see if he can trade with someone so things aren’t awkward with Brittany, who conveniently walks up and asks for a vodka soda at that moment. A drink that takes five seconds to make magically takes five awkward minutes because Tom Sandoval is the only bartender in America that doesn’t have lemon slices.

Jax is like, “I should go talk to her,” and Sandoval reminds her that’s a terrible idea. Lisa goes to talk to Brittany and tells her that she’s young and doesn’t need to put up with this shit. Tom tells Jax that he probably needs space from their apartment and he needs to get some help. Scheana and Ariana go to help Brittany, and Jax rants about how if anyone not involved - Scheana, Kristen, Ariana - tries to come at him, he’s going to lose it. Tom Sandoval reminds him that he’s the one who put himself in this situation and now he has to deal with it all. Even Sandoval is pissed. Jax is in denial - he’s like, “I’ll go to a hotel, but I don’t think that’s what she wants,” and Sandoval reassured him that yes, Brittany wants to be alone right now. She does not wantt o be around you. But oh, Brittany slept with Jax earlier that day.

Brittany, gurl. Come on.

I get that it’s hard to move on past him but you don’t have to fuck the dude.

Next Week: Tom brings Lisa a gift, Stassi is throwing a “Fuck Jax” party, and Jax flips out. OH, HELLO, LALA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Random Assessments from the Desk of Amanda:

My favorite part of this episode is drunk Tom Schwartz admitting he has Stockholm Syndrome and Ariana and Tom just talking over him.

I’m so proud of the people on this show for their ability to keep storylines under wraps. I was convinced from social media this season was ging to be boring and everyone getting along and it is so fire.

I’m loving the small doses of Katie and Kristen. It’s the perfect amount, espeically after last season being 100% Katie, 100% of the time.

Another Lala-free episode, what ever will I do?

Seriously, the reason why #MeToo is happening is because men are now realizing that even by sitting back and saying nothing they’re complicit in sexual harassment. “Protecting” your friend makes you culpable. Stop asking women to make men better. Men should be doing that themselves and holding each other accountable. ↩︎

Just here to remind you that Lorena Bobbitt was a woman who was abused and raped in her marriage in a time when no one did shit about women being abused and raped in their marriage and she should have sparked a national discussion about spousal rape. Instead, we get her name tossed around willy-nilly as a form of a crude punchline. What Lorena Bobbitt did was never about cutting off a dick, but the story turned into that. ↩︎

I also wish I was the kind of person who was impressed by cars. Like, I can see that it’s a gorgeously crafted piece of machinery but... eh? I much prefer Lisa’s house porn. ↩︎

Holy SHIT she even has the peephole frame from Friends on her door… but THE PEEP HOLE IS TO THE RIGHT OF THE FRAME. I fucking hate you, Katie. Oh my god. ↩︎

I think she realizes what she gets out of being in a relationship with this guy, unfortunately. I mean, she has @brittany on Instagram. I can’t imagine what she paid for that handle, and she certainly only got it because of her notoriety from being on this show. I would love for @amanda on insta, but I have to settle for @lochnessmanda (shameless plug, follow me!). As we (I mean y’all, not me) have seen from the Kentucky spin-off, her family so wants her to get married to this dude they’ll put up with anything except homosexuality. ↩︎

Fake eyelashes are expensive, if I’m sleeping with a guy with a girlfriend I’m definitely not leaving THOSE behind. Slip those in the sunglasses compartment of your purse!!!! I really should write an article about “nasty beauty hacks” like “no hair-tie and you’re sleeping at a guy’s house? Use your underwear!” I’m disgusting. Didn’t I spend a paragraph talking about how not trashy I am last week? Pfft. ↩︎

Jax is everything I hate about men’s fashion - the chunky sweaters, the collars under crew-neck sweaters, ugh. It’s all awful. He looks terrible in clothes, how did he have a modeling career. ↩︎

Like Michael Jackson in the Thriller music video. ↩︎

Vanderpups is such a lost opportunity here. ↩︎

As a person who is very insecure about the kind of friend she is, it’s nice to see people who are genuinely good friends to others. I’m very lucky to have the friends I have in my life and I hope I regularly remind them of how important they are to me. And now I’m really crying. ↩︎

Honestly, though, growing up in Metro Detroit, this was not a strange question to be asked. I honestly taste Tangerine La Croix when I hang out with my friend Celia’s mom. I would go over there to hang out with Celia, and stay for the La Croix. ↩︎

Speaking of podcasts... ↩︎

#vanderpump rules #GIVE ME LALA #WHERE IS LALA #omg i'm just glad i'm done #bachelor bios are coming this week aren't they #good god i am busy #recap #tv recap #reality tv

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blschaos3000-blog · 5 years

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Its 5:17 pm

Welcome to “8 Questions with…..”

I recently was approached by a producer named Chris Morrisey about talking with our next guest Emmanuel Osorio,a 19 year old film director who is prepping his first film for release. Now normally interviewing a artist with no track record is a high risk because there isn’t anything the public can actually see for themselves. But as anyone who knows me either through my blog or in real life can tell you,I love to find new voices no matter where they may come from. Giving a young man like Emmaunel a platform to share his story is no different from giving a band their first show or in my own case,sharing my first film review. We all have to start with step one,right? Besides,I could sense that same excitement I feel when I was talking with Chris,he has found a talented director and smart young man in Emmaunel Osorio and believes he is destined for big things….and my gut is telling me that Chris is right. With that in mind..let’s go ask Emmanuel his 8 Questions……

Please introduce yourself and tell us about your current project.

My name is Emmanuel Osorio and I am a 19 year old Latino filmmaker, writer, actor, producer and film buff. I was born and raised in the amazing city of Los Angeles and I am currently working on my first feature film titled “BLASÉ L.A.” Blasé L.A. is a semi-autobiographical time capsule of Los Angeles that follows a group of young millennials growing up in this fame and selfie obsessed city. Prior to Blasé L.A., I had a huge interest in photography and visual art. I have photographed everything from editorial fashion shoots to landscapes and everything in between. I also have directed and acted in several plays prior to jumping into filmmaking. It felt like a natural transition to combine the best of both worlds and explore what comes out of it.

While you’re only 19, Los Angeles has a way of making folks grow up a bit faster. What three impressions has growing up in Los Angeles left on you?

Growing up in the city of Los Angeles has very much shaped me to be the person I am today. Hollywood and the entertainment industry made a huge impression on me early on, it is hard not to be dazzled by the glitz and glamour of it all. I always enjoyed reading books and watching movies as a child but I didn’t always have time or access to it because I was busy with school work. My mother always pushed me to attempt new things to the best of my ability. She constantly placed me in environments that I would learn from. When I was able to, I would focus on music, dance, art, acting, and sports. At a very young age, I was hand selected from a group of children to participate in an all-paid dance scholarship in Downtown L.A. While doing that, I started to notice that opportunities for success can be found anywhere if you are determined and willing to put in the effort, so I tend to strive for perfection as much as possible in anything I do.

I feel that L.A. is so diverse with many different cultures and that made a great impression on me as well. Most of the people I met growing up moved here from somewhere else to pursue their dreams in the entertainment industry. I feel that I learned a lot from just hearing people’s various stories about life before arriving to L.A. and I got to witness the ups and downs and see how much dedication is involved if you want to become successful in any type of career. I decided early on that when I finished high school I would focus on making my goals a reality. This city offers so many opportunities and there is room for everyone to succeed.

After high school, I got a scholarship to a college 60 miles outside of Los Angeles and my family highly encouraged me to accept it. I was torn because this college is in a very secluded location and I knew it would isolate me being so far away from L.A. While there, I felt very sheltered and continued to work on writing and photography as a creative outlet. It was easy to get distracted because the other students there didn’t have many career goals and were just attending classes on auto-pilot. There was a cabin fever vibe with everyone being stuck on the campus with nowhere to go, so the kids were all about partying at night and oversleeping the next day, then showing up late to classes — not caring if you completed the assignments or received good grades. It, unfortunately, was a toxic environment and I realized that if I stayed there, I would never be able to focus on achieving my dreams. I needed to take a leave and come back to L.A. On the bright side, the college party lifestyle experience gave me a lot of material to put into my script. I was able to make lemonade out of lemons, so to speak.

What led you into making your own films?

I always have been fascinated by movies and the stories people tell visually. In my early teens, I began to discover a lot of classic Hollywood films and game changing movies by directors like Stanley Kubrick, Quentin Tarantino, Francis Ford Coppola, Guillermo Del Toro, Alfred Hitchcock, Steven Spielberg and Robert Rodriguez. Watching their films inspired so many ideas of my own, I decided that I want to do what they do. These filmmakers have opened up a whole new creative space for me to play in and I am loving every minute of it!

I read the synopsis for your film,do you feel your generation is shallow and materialistic? Is film one of the last things that will bring people together for a face to face interaction?

I do notice people of all ages with those traits but it’s all because of smart-phones and advanced technology. I feel that going to the cinema is one of the only places right now where you have to shut your phone off for two hours and focus on something other than social media. I think it is great that a lot of movie theaters are very strict about making sure nobody can interrupt a film. During High School and my short time in college, I felt a lot of the kids there were all about social status and there is a huge obsession with the internet and how many “likes” and comments you get on your social media photo posts. At times, It all seemed like a competition. I love that technology has evolved and that we have access to use these tools to our advantage, but I remember recently sitting at a restaurant with a group of friends and some of us were texting each other even though we were sitting directly across one another at the table. The minute the food was served, everyone whipped out their phones and took photos of the food for their instagram feeds. Times like that make me feel like my generation can be superficial and shallow. Going to a movie theater with a group of friends and then talking with each other about the film after it ends feels special. I appreciate that outlets such as Netflix and Hulu exist and people have more access to discover films, but I truly hope people continue to keep movie theaters in business by taking the time to escape and experience the stories we dream up and create for everyone. I want my films to be seen on the big screen in dark cinema. If someone watches on their cell phone or laptop there are too many distractions and you don’t get the full experience.

What are three things that surprised you the most in directing a film for the first time?

The first thing that surprised me was how easy things started to come together once the script was completed and I started to map out how to turn this all into a reality. I was able to get great feedback and suggestions from people I met in the industry through networking. They happily gave me great advice just by politely asking a lot of questions.

Another thing that surprised me was how comfortable I was at solving problems by finding creative solutions. Instead of being stressed or disappointed if we lost a certain location or couldn’t get a brand we specially wanted for a scene, I was able to tap into my creativity as a writer and tweak the script or dialog to make things work and still be satisfied with the changes.

I also wrote the main character in the film for myself to perform as an actor since the storyline is semi-autobiographical. I think it was surprising was how challenging, yet rewarding it was to direct myself and rely on my crew and producers to guide me through it. There was a huge trust involved and I couldn’t have an ego or be too self conscious when we filmed the scenes I was in.

How did you go about gathering the resources and money for your project? Why would investors gamble on a newcomer? How did you pitch your film?

That was a big challenge in the beginning and very intimidating while writing my script. I asked a lot of other filmmakers what avenues they took to raise money or find investors. Most of them suggested crowdfunding or making a short film as a calling card to show to film studios and possible investors. I was lucky enough to meet my producers through networking at film screenings and various film events. Everyone I met told me they were impressed that I have such a drive and determination at such a young age. One producer said I should just be daring and make the full film and skip making a short. This producer introduced me to other people he knew in the industry that he felt would connect with the storyline and overall vibe of the project. Things clicked and came together and I was lucky enough that people believed in me and the project and decided to take a chance on me. Things came together very quickly which was a little overwhelming, but it all felt right and as if it was meant to be, so I am even more determined now to make sure this film is a huge success. I truly want to have a long term career in this industry and continue making films for years to come so I am willing to invest in myself and work as hard as possible to achieve my goals.

What three directors working today do you admire most and why?

Quentin Tarantino is a huge inspiration to me! I regularly go to see films at his movie theater, the New Beverly Cinema, to discover many classic films I didn’t have a chance to see growing up. I feel like his career and the success of his films have paved the way for people like me by proving that anything is possible. Guillermo Del Toro also inspires me. He is so humble and I recently attended the unveiling presentation of his star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. It made me think that one day I might be able to have my own star as well. Robert Rodriguez is another huge inspiration. I read his book Rebel Without a Crew early on and it gave me so much confidence to take chances. His motto is No risk, No gain.

What kind of films do you want to make? Do you feel the bigger the budget the less creative freedom you lose?

I want to make films that open doors for other people and inspire others to follow my footsteps. If I can do it than anybody else can if you put in the hard work. I want to tell compelling diverse cultural stories and come up with original ideas that Hollywood hasn’t showcased yet. I want to have creative freedom at any budget. I feel like if you stay true to your creative vision you can tell stories with any size budget. I hope to continue to surround myself with people who believe in me and believe in my art to be able to do this for as long as possible because I love it!

What is next for for you after this film?

BLASÉ L.A, is currently in post production and should be ready to premiere in early 2020. Cannes Film Festival is a big goal. I would like to tour the film in as many cities and countries as I can. I want it to be seen in as many theaters as possible. I have some other scripts I am starting to write but my main goal right now is to present BLASÉ L.A. to the world. I definitely have a follow-up film in mind but I think it will all come together once this film is released.

The cheetah and I flying to watch your latest film project but we are a day early and you are playing tour guide,what are we doing?

The great thing about L.A. is that there are so many different things to do within a short drive (as long as you don’t run into too much traffic). L.A. is a place where you can go to the beach in the morning then drive two hours to the mountains and play in the snow. It is a melting pot of so many different cultures and amazing mini cities. You can go to downtown LA and feel like you are in New York, then head over to the beach and soak up the artistic hippie vibe of Venice Beach. You can get a gourmet latte and window shop at all the posh designer stores in Beverly Hills then head to Disneyland and be a kid again. There is a place to basically fit every mood. There are so many famous landmarks and historic places that all can be seen in just a few hours. Hollywood Boulevard is a must if you are into anything movie related. I love this city and my film BLASÉ L.A is also a loving tribute to it.

I like to thank both Emmanuel for the interview and Chris for helping secure it.We will be looking forward to seeing “BLASE L.A.” in 2020 and reviewing it as well We wish nothing but the best for Emmanuel….

You can follow Emmanuel a couple of different ways:

You can follow him on his very busy InstaGram page. You can also see whats coming next via his IMDb page.

Its been an incredible time as of late with all these interviews but don’t worry,the cheetah and I are still reviewing films/TV shows as well and have some great films coming up.

Feel free to drop a comment below and thank you for your support! 8 Questions with………film director/writer Emmanuel Osorio Its 5:17 pm Welcome to "8 Questions with....." I recently was approached by a producer named Chris Morrisey about talking with our next guest Emmanuel Osorio,a 19 year old film director who is prepping his first film for release.

#8 Questions With #Chris Morrisey #directing #drive #Emmaunel Osorio #experence #goals #Hard work #indie film makers #interview #Life #Los Angeles #Screenwriter #writer

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tedcatchpole-blog · 7 years

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Narcos season 3 review

Narcos. Season 3 episodes 1-3

I went into watching this, knowing that there have been parts of the previous seasons I have not enjoyed but that the overall entertainment I received certainly made it worth my while sticking with it. It is quite often the case with recent TV series, I think of Hannibal and Boardwalk Empire , particularly the latter with killing off, to my mind, the strongest character at the end of season 2 (Michael Pitt as Jimmy Darmody), that you get episodes that do not live up to previous standards. Sometimes this can be more than just one or two episodes, sometimes half a series. This is particularly risky when (as in the aforementioned Hannibal, it is the first episodes in a new season. That is how you lose a viewer. Hannibal nearly lost me in the first tedious half of season 2 but I was very glad I stuck with it as I found the latter portion of said series to be impeccable entertainment.

So in series 3 of Narcos, I have found both aspects. They have killed off a major character, pretty much the main character, especially considering the blandness of the narrator and hero of the first two series, Steve. He is rather an empty vessel, and more so up against the colourful and grandiose Pablo Escobar, who was (more or less) in sync with history, killed at the end of the last series.

So we have gone into the new series with the charismatic villain dead and some businessmen and a playboy taking over.

When the new series starts we are left to deduce for ourselves that the main protagonist from seasons 1 and 2, Boyd Holdbrooks DEA agent Stephen Murphy, is not in in with us for season 3. Our new narrator is the womanising previously decamped agent Pena. A man with a Derek Zoolander approach to facial expressions, except he has two looks, apologetic and sorry.

He is back in the fray due to his knowledge of the current antagonists, the Cali Cartel. The rivals to Escobar who have taken over in his absence and increased cocaine production and distribution to the USA, particularly New York as we find out. I did like Javier Pena. I wish they had eased up on the reluctant womaniser cliche, it's very tired, but if the first episode is anything to go by. They are not.

He is back on the case. After a really arbitrary group of scenes at his home town, one of many really clumpy and lazy season 3 exposition scenes, where he meets an old flame who he apparently treated badly but has forgiven him because after he left her she found true love, then with his sage-like father warning him, just as he did years before, to not be naive in the big bad world, we see him back in Colombia. He has been asked back but told it has to be by the book. He has a well meaning but geeky team under him, and he is told that it is not a gunfight. It will not be like Pablo. It will be intelligence led. A welcome return is made by the convincing Bill Stechner as the contentious CIA station chief who previously ousted Havi Pena only to be the one who called him back. They get off to a predictably unfriendly start as they meet in a bar (halfway through agent Pena picking up on a woman in a bar when he is feeling down about things ...yawn…) but I think he is a better foil for Pena than the beige-misted Steve Murphy.

As far as the baddies go, as the end of season 2 showed us, its the Cali Cartel. They are very different to Pablo and his Medellin outfit, they are known as the “Gentlemen of Cali”, where Pablo welcomed publicity,fame, and public adoration, they eschew it. In the last series, they were shown to be very tough but not as ruthless as Pablo. In the last series we were shown that they were like bankers. They were cutthroat but only in a business sense, at least at the top.

However, at the beginning of series 3 we have been shown, rather clumsily I think, that they can be as violent and brutal as El Padrone was. For example, the non-related member of the Cali bosses, Pacho Herrera, was shown to be as sadisticly violent as anyone else when he had a rival narco with whom he had an undisclosed beef, ripped limb from limb by motorcycles. Unfortunately this incident was so clearly nothing more than a force-fed way to show the audience that the Cali guys were also tough and nasty that it felt obtuse and clunky. Remember in the Godfather II when they have the prostitute murdered by Al Neri just to blackmail the Senator? Apparently that was included to remind the audience how vile the Mafia was, after the seemingly quite forgivable actions in the first made them come across as sort of rough diamond bad guys killing worse guys. So imagine if that subtle and excellent subtext had been done at the end of the first movie in a post credits scene, if Al Neri after he had expertly gunned down Don Barzini went to his hideout apartment and after a hallway encounter over nothing more than a loudly slammed door had been shown gutting an innocent mother in front of her children and giving a wink as the camera closes in on his eye, then that is what we have here. Anyway, they are all reintroduced, the leader, Gilberto Rodriguez, is cold blooded, yet maybe a bit distanced from the day to day cocaine business and therefore not maybe as aggressively ruthless as the more involved bosses of past and present, but it seems in no way unclear, he is numero uno. Then his brother Miguel, a rather enigmatic type, who seems to have a motive in playing saviour to a rival's wife (the aforementioned chap ripped apart by suzukis) but it appears sex is not the reason. It leaves a question open but I am not sure if it is interesting enough to take up much screen time.

The main issue, revealed at the close of the first episode is that the Cali cartel is disbanding, withdrawing from Cocaine and will hand themselves in. This is to happen in six months. The plan is for deals made through bribery and legal manipulation, the top guys will serve no time and will have plenty to retire on, and for the mid levels who will serve some time, they have six months during which they are to go all out to make as much money as possible, to go totally balls-out so they can serve a few months and have plenty saved to make it a worthwhile sacrifice to be able to live free of legal scrutiny. This decision was made purely by the top bosses. Obviously there were voices of dissent. The way they are discovered is classy television. Great editing and gripping action. The goal will now be for the authorities to get them before the six months expires.

We have the snidey accountant. The immensely well played (by Javier Camara) Guillermo Pallomari. A man who seems to be what the Nazi propaganda tried to make Jewish people look like to German children in the mid 1930s. Slimy, unethical, selfish, and happy to see others suffer. He is certainly likely to be a pivotal role in this seasons shenanigans. Also there is the equally enjoyable yet far more likeable Jorge Salcedo. He is the Cali’s head of security. A tortured man, he was planning on leaving to start his own security firm but after being told of the six-month plot he is asked (“asked”) to stay on. Alongside a burgeoning resentment from the obviously spoiled and incapable David Rodriguez, son of the Cartel's boss,Gilberto We see soon how he is not a man of cartel ethics. At the party where the Rodriguez brothers announce their grand plan he discovers a waiter who is wearing a wire. We also see what a fully competent security operative he is. HE shows the waiter he knows who has sent him and why and gives him a final and clear chance to leave Cali, he then disorientates the DEA agents who set the trap with consummate ease. Also we see him expertly foil a DEA raid to the aforementioned icky accountants office. The accountants arrogance nearly cost the Cali boys everything but Jorge using his strength, guile, and wit prevents it. I really do look forward to seeing how he arcs through the series

Agent Pena is for some reason being cited as a hero at the agency. He has gone from a regular agent to some sort of supercop, which given the sacrifices made by the Colombian forces and the other domestic and foreign agencies coupled with the fact he was not present at Escobar's death seems a little unlikely. Anyway, with this status he is in some sort of role (referred to as a “promotion” but at no point yet given a title or description) that leaves a vacancy for the roles filled by him and the strangely unmentioned Stephen Murphy. So step forward agents Feistl and Van Ness. Introduced as such a blatantly low grade version of Pena and Murphy I thought I had tuned into a franchised remake on a public access channel. They even look the same, but come across as….remember the movie The Beach, the two air head surfer stoners Sammy and Zeph that end up ruining it all with their stupidity? They reminded me of exactly those guys (not the book characters, for those who remember the book will know why).

They are made out to be bumbling and incompetent. One (Feistl) is played to be over zealous and naive and the other one (the other one) is played as phoning his job in and completely disinterested.

However, they appear by episode three to actually be very able, determined and, were it not for the sharp response of the Jack Bauer-esque Cali security chief, the guys who could have bought the Cartel down.

So If you want to know is it any good? Yes it is. If you had asked me that after episode 2 I might have replied differently, but episode three just like in Hannibal and Boardwalk, has made me glad I persisted and reminded me why I liked this series so much.

There are many careless scenes. Some really clunky exposition, and there are gaps left where there needs to be a bridge of some sort.

If I am asked can this series survive without Escobar, I would have said after two hours, no. Yet I am starting to think that the threads cast by the accountant, security chief, new agents, and the political tension wickedly stirred up by CIA spook Stechner are all going to weave into a really gripping re-telling of real life events

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footballghana · 4 years

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FEATURE: 5 footballers who have performed far better for their national team than their clubs

As prestigious and glamorous as it is to play for a big European club, nothing can ever beat the feeling of laying your palm over your homeland's crest, beneath which lies your heart, beating rhythmically to the tune of the national anthem.

There is a sense of pride involved in representing your national team that is greater than any other football can offer. While most top players turn up in equally good spirit for both club and country, there is always an odd bloke or two who ups his game to an unforeseeable level, as long as his national team endeavours are concerned.

Mexico's 2014 World Cup hero Guillermo Ochoa is a fine example of a player who never quite managed to replicate his national team form for any club with consistency.

Chilean Mauricio Isla is a mainstay at right wing-back for La Roja, but has been flipped by one club too many since he left Udinese for Juventus. He has therefore failed to make as much of a mark for any club as he did for the Chile national team.

Today we will be looking at five of the finest examples of such national heroes who could never really hit the same heights at club level. While different players have created different legacies for their respective nations, there is one thing common to all - they absolutely adore international breaks!

#5 Mario Yepes (Colombia)

Caps: 102

Goals: 6

To be fair to Yepes, he was considered one of the better defenders in the world around the middle of the first decade of the millennium when he played for PSG in France. However, his greatness in club football would not last long.

He moved to Italy in 2008, where he stayed till 2014, playing for three different clubs including AC Milan. However, he never managed to feature for Milan in more than half of their league matches in any of the three seasons he was part of the Rossoneri. All in all, he was just another brick in the wall.

The same cannot be said about his international career, which ended in 2014. Mario Alberto Yepes Díaz retired as one of the greatest representatives Colombia has ever had in the world of football. He represented Colombia on the global stage a staggering 102 times, only bettered by Carlos Valderrama.

He was a part of the 2001 Colombia squad that won the Copa America. He also captained them to their best ever World Cup finish in 2014, where they bowed out to Brazil in the quarter-final.

There's no denying that Yepes enjoyed a respectable club career, but his greatness will always be measured by his national team heroics, and rightfully so.

#4 Lukas Podolski (Germany)

Caps: 130

Goals: 49

Lukas Podolski's club career was by no means unimportant, but his contribution for the national team was so much greater that it far overshadowed everything he did at the club level.

He is 3rd in appearances for the Germans. The players around him are Lothar Matthaus, Miroslav Klose, Bastian Schweinsteiger and Philipp Lahm. That alone is proof enough of his greatness. To add to that, he is also 3rd in the list of goalscorers for Germany, with 49.

Compared to that, his club level CV makes for interesting reading, with clubs like Bayern Munich and Arsenal amongst others. However, as long as major honours are concerned, he only managed to win a Bundesliga title, to go with an FA Cup and one DFB Pokal.

Furthermore, he wasn't either club's go-to star man. Clearly his club career is a shadow of his international career at best.

To think he was rejected by Poland in his youth when he was still eligible to represent them, is quite baffling now that we think about it. Podolski played for Germany in four Euros and three World Cups, and won the 2014 edition.

A true grit-and-grind player who had a hammer of a left foot, he called it quits against England in 2016, fittingly after scoring the winner in an enthralling encounter.

#3 Sergio Romero (Argentina)

Caps: 96

Clean Sheets: 47

Despite being a goalkeeper, Sergio Romero has not made more league appearances for any club in his career so far than he has won caps for Argentina.

Admittedly, he played at a time when Argentina were only blessed at the forward spot and he perhaps did not have to face extreme competition for his place in the national team. Having said that, Romero did a fantastic job once he did get the starting role, though, keeping nearly a clean-sheet every other game.

He, just like his Argentine peers, is perhaps unlucky to not have won anything except the 2008 Olympic gold, despite coming very close a number of times. He has always been a very dependable presence under the post for La Albiceleste, and although it cannot be said he was poor for any of his club sides, he was certainly not the same player.

He was an important part of the AZ team that won the 2008-09 Eredivisie, and an important understudy of David de Gea at Manchester United. Obviously, though, his club achievements are a far cry from his international ones.

#2 Eduardo Vargas (Chile)

Caps: 91

Goals: 38

When we talk about legendary Chilean strikers, Marcelo Salas and Ivan Zamorano come to mind. Eduardo Vargas has more goals than both of them. Although that fact in itself is enough to prove Vargas' international legacy, there's an even more deciding factor.

Vargas was a very important figure in Chile's two back-to-back Copa America titles in 2015 and 2016. In comparison, neither Salas nor Zamorano managed to win a major trophy with their national team.

As long as his club career is concerned, it is hardly anything to boast about. He played only 19 league games for Napoli in three years, often going out on loan. One may also be forgiven for forgetting he played for Hoffenheim less than three years ago.

He has found some much needed stability with Tigres, and has played over 100 games for them now. However, there is no denying that when he hangs up his boots, it's his international career that people will talk about.

#1 Asamoah Gyan (Ghana)

Caps: 109

Goals: 51

Asamoah Gyan is the most capped Ghanaian player of all time, and the only one who went over the century mark for that matter. However, when you look at his peers just below him, including Richard Kingson and John Paintsil, it somewhat tarnishes the achievement.

He manages to shine much brighter than them, with a ridiculous strike rate of 51 goals in 109 appearances. He is by far the nation's highest goalscorer.

Gyan is quite possibly the greatest national team only player, because one would struggle to even name his former clubs, bar Sunderland, maybe. Including the English club, his record for Rennes and Udinese are quite impressive as well, and he scored at least 11 times for each club, despite playing less than 50 league games for any of them.

He sent shockwaves around Europe when he decided to leave European football, when he was clearly good enough to play there. He instead opted to cash in, and played for Al Ain, where he scored more goals than games he played. He most recently plied his trade for Indian Super League club North East United FC.

His international career on the other hand, is the greatest by any Ghanaian ever. He led his country to their best ever World Cup finish in 2010, scoring an extra-time winner against USA in the Round of 16.

Then, in the quarter final against Uruguay, he made history for all the wrong reasons, and missed the penalty that would have surely taken them to the semi final.

However, his legacy is unlikely to be tainted by those lows. He scored plenty of priceless goals for the Black Stars, and is also their highest ever World Cup goalscorer, scoring one more than Roger Milla.

In fact, he may further better those already amazing numbers, as he overturned his decision to retire from international football in 2019.

Source: sportskeeda.com

source: https://footballghana.com/

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soccernetghana · 4 years

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5 footballers who have performed better for their national teams than clubs

[caption id="attachment_806668" align="alignnone" width="600"] Asamoah Gyan[/caption] Asamoah Gyan is the most capped Ghanaian player of all time, and the only one who went over the century mark for that matter. However, when you look at his peers just below him, including Richard Kingson and John Paintsil, it somewhat tarnishes the achievement. He manages to shine much brighter than them, with a ridiculous strike rate of 51 goals in 109 appearances. He is by far the nation's highest goalscorer. Gyan is quite possibly the greatest national team only player, because one would struggle to even name his former clubs, bar Sunderland, maybe. Including the English club, his record for Rennes and Udinese are quite impressive as well, and he scored at least 11 times for each club, despite playing less than 50 league games for any of them. He sent shockwaves around Europe when he decided to leave European football, when he was clearly good enough to play there. He instead opted to cash in, and played for Al Ain, where he scored more goals than games he played. He most recently plied his trade for Indian Super League club North East United FC. His international career on the other hand, is the greatest by any Ghanaian ever. He led his country to their best ever World Cup finish in 2010, scoring an extra-time winner against USA in the Round of 16. Then, in the quarter final against Uruguay, he made history for all the wrong reasons, and missed the penalty that would have surely taken them to the semi final. However, his legacy is unlikely to be tainted by those lows. He scored plenty of priceless goals for the Black Stars, and is also their highest ever World Cup goalscorer, scoring one more than Roger Milla. In fact, he may further better those already amazing numbers, as he overturned his decision to retire from international football in 2019. Caps: 109 Goals: 51 #2 Eduardo Vargas (Chile) When we talk about legendary Chilean strikers, Marcelo Salas and Ivan Zamorano come to mind. Eduardo Vargas has more goals than both of them. Although that fact in itself is enough to prove Vargas' international legacy, there's an even more deciding factor. Vargas was a very important figure in Chile's two back-to-back Copa America titles in 2015 and 2016. In comparison, neither Salas nor Zamorano managed to win a major trophy with their national team. As long as his club career is concerned, it is hardly anything to boast about. He played only 19 league games for Napoli in three years, often going out on loan. One may also be forgiven for forgetting he played for Hoffenheim less than three years ago. He has found some much needed stability with Tigres, and has played over 100 games for them now. However, there is no denying that when he hangs up his boots, it's his international career that people will talk about. Caps: 91 Goals: 38 Sergio Romero Caps: 96 Clean Sheets: 47 Despite being a goalkeeper, Sergio Romero has not made more league appearances for any club in his career so far than he has won caps for Argentina. Admittedly, he played at a time when Argentina were only blessed at the forward spot and he perhaps did not have to face extreme competition for his place in the national team. Having said that, Romero did a fantastic job once he did get the starting role, though, keeping nearly a clean-sheet every other game. He, just like his Argentine peers, is perhaps unlucky to not have won anything except the 2008 Olympic gold, despite coming very close a number of times. He has always been a very dependable presence under the post for La Albiceleste, and although it cannot be said he was poor for any of his club sides, he was certainly not the same player. He was an important part of the AZ team that won the 2008-09 Eredivisie, and an important understudy of David de Gea at Manchester United. Obviously, though, his club achievements are a far cry from his international ones. Lukas Podolski Caps: 130 Goals: 49 Lukas Podolski's club career was by no means unimportant, but his contribution for the national team was so much greater that it far overshadowed everything he did at the club level. He is 3rd in appearances for the Germans. The players around him are Lothar Matthaus, Miroslav Klose, Bastian Schweinsteiger and Philipp Lahm. That alone is proof enough of his greatness. To add to that, he is also 3rd in the list of goalscorers for Germany, with 49. Compared to that, his club level CV makes for interesting reading, with clubs like Bayern Munich and Arsenal amongst others. However, as long as major honours are concerned, he only managed to win a Bundesliga title, to go with an FA Cup and one DFB Pokal. Furthermore, he wasn't either club's go-to star man. Clearly his club career is a shadow of his international career at best. To think he was rejected by Poland in his youth when he was still eligible to represent them, is quite baffling now that we think about it. Podolski played for Germany in four Euros and three World Cups, and won the 2014 edition. A true grit-and-grind player who had a hammer of a left foot, he called it quits against England in 2016, fittingly after scoring the winner in an enthralling encounter.#5 Mario Yepes (Colombia) 5 Mario Yepes (Colombia) Goals: 6 To be fair to Yepes, he was considered one of the better defenders in the world around the middle of the first decade of the millennium when he played for PSG in France. However, his greatness in club football would not last long. He moved to Italy in 2008, where he stayed till 2014, playing for three different clubs including AC Milan. However, he never managed to feature for Milan in more than half of their league matches in any of the three seasons he was part of the Rossoneri. All in all, he was just another brick in the wall. The same cannot be said about his international career, which ended in 2014. Mario Alberto Yepes Díaz retired as one of the greatest representatives Colombia has ever had in the world of football. He represented Colombia on the global stage a staggering 102 times, only bettered by Carlos Valderrama. He was a part of the 2001 Colombia squad that won the Copa America. He also captained them to their best-ever World Cup finish in 2014, where they bowed out to Brazil in the quarter-final. There's no denying that Yepes enjoyed a respectable club career, but his greatness will always be measured by his national team heroics, and rightfully so. Guillermo Ochoa (Mexico) As prestigious and glamorous as it is to play for a big European club, nothing can ever beat the feeling of laying your palm over your homeland's crest, beneath which lies your heart, beating rhythmically to the tune of the national anthem. There is a sense of pride involved in representing your national team that is greater than any other football can offer. While most top players turn up in equally good spirit for both club and country, there is always an odd bloke or two who ups his game to an unforeseeable level, as long as his national team endeavours are concerned. Mexico's 2014 World Cup hero Guillermo Ochoa is a fine example of a player who never quite managed to replicate his national team form for any club with consistency. Chilean Mauricio Isla is a mainstay at right wing-back for La Roja, but has been flipped by one club too many since he left Udinese for Juventus. He has therefore failed to make as much of a mark for any club as he did for the Chile national team. Today we will be looking at five of the finest examples of such national heroes who could never really hit the same heights at club level. While different players have created different legacies for their respective nations, there is one thing common to all - they absolutely adore international breaks! Source: Sportskeeda source: https://ghanasoccernet.com/

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cryptodictation · 4 years

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The Copa de Suárez Mason and his son Marcos | When e…

May 25, 1980 Diego Maradona was the promotional face of the Kirin Cup in Japan but he was in the Villa Crespo neighborhood. He couldn't play in Tokyo and Buenos Aires at the same time, 18,376 kilometers apart. It was not possible for Argentinos Juniors either, who beat Tigre on the Atlanta court and on that national day put a youth team on the other side of the planet. If the civic-military dictatorship had taken over the country, the genocidal Carlos Suárez Mason made and broke at his whim at the La Paternal club. It was partner 322,082, but much more than that.

Outside the institution he decided on the life and death of millions of Argentines, inside he had certain tastes. Her son Marcos Agustín went on the Asia tour as “reinforcement” with some of the '79 world youth champions. He was a striker who was older than the rest of the squad. He was born in 1954 and most of his circumstantial companions in 1961 and 1962. But he had had a brief stint at the first one in San Telmo in 1975, a credit with which he perhaps intended to justify his presence. When they returned from the trip – which included two games with two defeats – their father was waiting for them in Ezeiza. José Luis Lanao, witness of that moment, played in Vélez and had also been summoned for that excursion which ended 4-0 against England's Middlesbrough, the winner of the contest that gave a few thousand dollars in prize money.

Maradona made one of two goals at 2-1 with Tigre on May 25 forty years ago. The other was converted by Silvano Espíndola. Argentinos was second and ran from behind to the River leader that finally would stay with the 1980 Metropolitan tournament. Diego's team was runner-up; Platense and third workshops. The Kirin Cup was too far from the showcases of La Paternal but the maximum figure of the '79 world youth champion was essential to advertise it. There was no question of despising her. There was money at stake that the club needed. Lanao was joined by another member of that great team led by Flaco Menotti: Jorge Piaggio from Atlanta. The defender recalls today that Marcos Agustín Suárez Alais – one of the seven sons of the former head of the First Army Corps – “was a right-wing leader and in Ezeiza he made us pass without any control.”

The general's son never made his debut in the Primera de Argentinos Juniors – he had two dates in the substitute bank at the Metropolitano in 1978 – something he had achieved with San Telmo in 1975. He came to play four games, scored a goal against Estudiantes de Buenos Aires on the court of Isla Maciel and contributed to the promotion to A. Quilmes was champion and his team was second. They both went up. In that same tournament Claudio Tamburrini debuted as Almagro goalkeeper on April 19. He was one of the few detainees-disappeared who managed to escape from a clandestine center, I will be Mansion, the morning of March 24, '78. Today he lives in Sweden and holds a professorship as a philosopher at the University.

Suárez Alais's trail as a footballer was lost in '78, perhaps because he turned to study at the University of Buenos Aires from which he graduated in 1982. He did so with the title of electromechanical engineer with electronic orientation, according to the CV that he posted on Linkedin. Have a prolific and diversified curriculum where he declares that he is a technician in Social Psychology at the Pichón Riviere School, secretary of the Sai Baba Foundation where he has volunteered from January 2011 to the present day and also He says to collaborate in the care of a children's dining room in the town of González Catán. He defines this task as “a human experience that has given me a compassionate view of my own life towards everything around me. I have received a lot from all the people I have met there and I am grateful to life.”

Although he does not count it as a background, his experience in the Kirin Cup should be an indelible memory for him as a footballer. Maradona did not travel to play it but Suárez Alais had a round trip ticket to do so. Javier Roimiser, the head of the Department of History of Argentinos Juniors provides valuable data that he treasures in his personal file: “Maradona was going to the Cup with the entire First Division team, although he did not finally travel. These were the '61 and '62 categories, with players who reached the First Division like Carlos Olarán and Caruso Lombardi, also a goalkeeper, Enzo Farías, who was part of the reserve. “But the one who would go further than all is Sergio Batista, world champion of 1986 who played on tour as center midfielder.

The announcement of the participation of Argentines in the Cup with Diego

Argentines He debuted against the Japanese team on May 25, '80 and lost 3-1. Four days later the Middlesbrough thrashed him English who came as the pointer of group B at the end of the tournament. In the decisive match he beat Espanyol de Barcelona on penalties after drawing 1-1. It was the third edition of the cup where Suárez Alais and Lanao integrated the lead at the end of the tour. The first – could be said with a certain license – as a free player and the second as reinforcement provided by Vélez. His journey was more extended than necessary: he made stops in Los Angeles and Anchorage, the capital of Alaska. The sports experience in the Kirin ended badly, but the heir to Suárez Mason made him want to debut in an international championship.

Her father kept strutting around the club like the first time, when on April 13, 1977 he broke into the sports complex on 1271 Punta Arenas street. “I was that rainy afternoon at the club, at the sports center and I see about eight or ten Falcon arriving. The doorman approached and said: 'The military, the military.' Then I replied: 'Look if there is any leader and he is escaping. If they come looking for someone to leave because we don't know if they are going to kidnap him, “said the ex-vice president of the club, Alberto Pérez, many years after that visit by the military man. For more than two decades, Suárez Mason influenced the club's main decisions, he was granted the status of honorary partner and chaired his Heritage commission.

He would not be the only repressor who passed through Argentinos Juniors, as in most clubs during the dictatorship. His brother-in-law Félix Alejandro el Oso Alais was the owner of the Fast security company that guarded the Malvinas sports complex in those years. The former commissioner who joined Triple A He died in prison on August 6, 2012 without receiving a conviction for the crimes against humanity of which he was accused. On March 8, 1983, a couple denounced him, the Federal Police inspector officer Rodolfo Peregrino Fernández before the Argentine Commission on Human Rights (CADHU) in Madrid. He said it was “highly probable” that he had intervened in the murder of the national deputy Rodolfo Ortega Peña.

The result (in original language) of that Middlesbrough 4, Argentinos 0. (Courtesy Javier Roimiser)

Suárez Mason was expelled from Argentinos Juniors and his status as honorary partner was withdrawn on April 7, 1999, as recorded on page 224 of the club's minute book. In the register it was listed as Guillermo Suárez. His first name, Carlos, did not even appear, much less his second surname. He died at the age of 81 in the Devoto prison on June 21, 2005. But he received no conviction for any of the 635 crimes he was investigating. At the height of his power he controlled some sixty clandestine detention centers.

The shadow of his macabre presence remains in the institution of La Paternal, a controversial farewell barbecue that was made by some nostalgics, his son's unusual participation in the 1980 Kirin Cup, but above all the majority repudiation of his partners and fans.

In 2013, on the eve of a March 24 such as today, a plaque was discovered in the Diego Armando Maradona stadium with the names and photographs of seven missing detainees identified with the club's colors: Américo Jorge Marchetti, Néstor Julio Sanmartino , Gregorio Nachman, Guillermo Moralli, Ernesto “Jaio” Szerszewicz, Héctor Horacio Moreira and the filmmaker Raymundo Gleyzer. The Commission for Memory and Justice of La Paternal and Villa Miter and the Supporters of Argentinos Juniors for Memory organized the event. It is one more brick in the construction of a new subjectivity that makes clubs a space where the frontiers of sport, leisure and education are overcome. Your partners do not forget.

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Gary Russell Jr. vs. Tugstsogt Nyambayar Final Press Conference Quotes & Photos

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Published: February 07, 2020

WBC Featherweight Champion Russell Takes On Unbeaten Contender Nyambayar & Former Champions Guillermo Rigondeaux & Liborio Solis Battle for Vacant Bantamweight Title Live on SHOWTIME This Saturday, February 8 in Premier Boxing Champions Event in PPL Center in Allentown, Pennsylvania.

ALLENTOWN, PA. - WBC Featherweight World Champion Gary Russell Jr. and unbeaten mandatory challenger Tugstsogt "King Tug" Nyambayar went face-to-face at a final press conference Thursday before they headline action live on SHOWTIME on Saturday, February 8 in a Premier Boxing Champions event from PPL Center in Allentown, Pennsylvania.

The press conference also featured former champions Guillermo Rigondeaux and Liborio Solis, who battle in the co-main event for the vacant WBA Lightweight Title, plus Jaime Arboleda and Jayson Velez, who compete in a 12-round WBA Super Featherweight Title eliminator to open the SHOWTIME CHAMPIONSHIP BOXING telecast at 9 p.m. ET/6 p.m. PT.

Tickets for the live event, which is promoted by TGB Promotions and Kings Promotions, are on sale now and can be purchased through www.pplcenter.com/events (direct link HERE).

Here is what the fighters had to say Thursday from the Renaissance Allentown Hotel:

GARY RUSSELL JR.

"We had a great training camp. I have my younger brothers on the card with me and in camp, pushing me every day. We're ready, focused and hungry.

"Tug will be the best he possibly can be because he knows he's facing one of the best fighters in the world. He has everything to gain and nothing to lose. He's going to leave it all on the line.

"I think Tug is a lot more technically sound than a lot of the guys who I have competed against. He's another guy with everything to gain and nothing to lose, so I'm anticipating a tough fight.

"If it were up to me, I'd be facing Leo Santa Cruz or Gervonta Davis, but this is what I have to face. I'm here to defend my title in style once again.

"It's amazing to watch my younger brothers and to have them on the same card. I'm excited to work their corners. There's never been a set of three brothers to become world champions, and I think we'll do that real soon. They're both extremely talented and hungry. I expect them to be better than me by the time they're at this point in their careers.

"I was the first fighter to turn pro on ShoBox, and I went on to win my title on SHOWTIME. The fact that we're still doing it now speaks wonders. I work great with their team and I'm grateful to be in this position.

"You should expect to see what you always see with me. Boxing at its best. A great deal of ring generalship. Good boxing IQ. Hand speed. Punching power. The total package as a fighter. As a matter of fact, I'm trying to figure out why I'm not on the pound for pound list given all of that. That's an issue."

TUGSTSOGT NYAMBAYAR

"I'm very excited for this fight. It's going to be a good fight for the fans. Gary Russell Jr. is a great champion, but watch on Saturday night, when I become the new featherweight world champion.

"I just have to be better than Gary Russell on Saturday night. The past experience won't matter. If he thinks I'm too inexperienced for this fight, he is going to be in for a surprise Saturday.

"I know that I'm the underdog, but that doesn't affect me. I don't care if I'm the favorite or the underdog.

"I'm not worried about any ring rust. I've worked so hard in the ring during training camp to make sure I'm the best I've ever been.

"Working with Ismael Salas has been very good for me and I think it's taken me to another level in my career. All of skills, all of my power and speed, it will all be with me on Saturday. I just have to put it together for my best performance.

"I'm very ready for this fight. I want to be the first WBC featherweight champion in history from Mongolia. I'm ready, you just need to watch on Saturday."

GUILLERMO RIGONDEAUX

"Bantamweight is my division. I have no issues making that weight. I want to thank my team for getting me prepared and getting me to this position. All that's left is to fight Saturday night.

"I want to also thank Ronnie Shields for how he has prepared me for this fight. It's been a great training camp and I can't wait to step into the ring and become champion again.

"I feel 100% and I believe that bantamweight has always been my best weight. I did well at 122 pounds, so i stayed there. My plan now is to dominate this division.

"Me and Ronnie Shields have great chemistry and worked well together. Ronnie is a great trainer and I'm looking forward to a long run that we're going to have together.

"I'm going to be phenomenal in the ring. I'm going to unify 118 pounds just like I did at 122 pounds. I'm excited to get started.

"My strategy will depend on the fight that Solis brings. I'm a veteran in this sport, dating back to the amateurs, so I'm used to seeing so many different styles. I'm to fight the way that gives me the best chance to win."

LIBORIO SOLIS

"Thank you very much to my team who has backed me and supported me leading up to this fight. I'm very grateful for this opportunity. My opponent has been a great champion and I'm very excited to be here to fight him.

"This is obviously going to be a great fight. I'm a warrior who always comes to fight. He can pick his strategy however he wants. But I just want to get in there and put my skills on display.

I was already a champion in one division and I had a fight taken on the scorecards at bantamweight, or else i would already be a two-division champion.

"Saturday is going to be different than my last fights. Both me and Guillermo give our heart and soul and we're going to fight until the best man wins. I'm not leaving that ring without a championship.

"I'm going to come with everything on Saturday. I come to fight and I come to win. I'm sure Guillermo is the same. The difference will be my determination to win this fight.

"I don't think anyone's weight or which division we fought at in the past will be an advantage. I'm sure he could have always fought at 118. The person with the advantage is who wants it more."

JAIME ARBOLEDA

"I want to thank all the great champions up on this stage and everyone on my team who made this fight happen. This opportunity has been a long time coming and I've been preparing hard to make the most out of it.

"On Saturday, I'm very confident that this is going to be a great fight and end in a knockout. I'm prepared and I know that I'm going to win.

"This is a great chance to get one step closer to my dream of becoming a world champion. I know what I have to do and I've prepared every day to make sure that I fight my best on Saturday night.

"We have a lot of respect for each other and we're looking forward to Saturday night. Don't miss this card because it's going to be action packed from start to finish."

JAYSON VELEZ

"I'm happy to be here again and back in a big fight. My last time fighting on SHOWTIME was in 2012 and I'm very thankful for this opportunity to compete on this stage once again.

"I'm blessed to be able to do what I do every day. I've fought professionally since 2007. This is the dream that every boxer has. When I win on Saturday, I'll be the mandatory for the belt and that's the opportunity that I want.

"I've been training hard for this fight and I'm ready. I've won three fights in a row heading into a great fight between two hungry fighters. We want to add each other to our record and I believe that this fight is ending in knockout.

"Don't miss this fight because this is going to be great. There's going to be a lot of action. Every time I step into the ring, win or lose, I will leave everything in there. I fight with my heart and I fight for Puerto Rico."

(Featured Photo: Amanda Westcott/Showtime)

#HF #Gary Russell Jr.#Showtime Sports #Premier Boxing Champions

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