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#and imagining said chaos
aza-trash-can · 10 months
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I have splatoon music playing rn, and I can't take anything seriously
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oatbugs · 14 days
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last night i got home kind of tipsy and very much in tears and my mother told me the force you exert to keep someone in your life is proportional to the force with which they will leave your life. if you have to fight tooth and claw to keep them, their leaving will be just as hard, just as harsh, and just as definite.
#she said it like a law. its just momentum.#also she told me to get a therapist and start archery ASAP bc i need to get it together#and also she said even granting that this person u were in love w was So Special . as in hot motorcycle-riding iranian masc lesbian in ldn#they arent the only one on earth and that once i start my proper adult life outside of studies etc etc i will probably no longer live in th#UK. she said most non straight iranians u would like have left the country anyway . where do you think they went? theyre out there#and also she asked me to imagine how many hot gay iranians there may be in italy or amsterdam or smth and i was like ok points 😭 maybe#ur right. anyway i was having a feeling of dread bc crying into the arms of ur strict asian mother while buzzed usually results in#death chaos destruction etc in the next few days but actually i think maybe she has genuinely changed as a person and the fear is#unwarranted#anyway i need to eat breakfast and study w the date person i met yesterday#they are so nice ??? genuinely so so sweet i dont feel attracted to them at all omg i genuinely think i have a thing for hot evil ppl 😭#but we could b besties . theyre a lot more romantic than the ex situationship person too like generally . ugh they should be perfect but#alas it appears i am shallow as fuck or potentially a lesbian actually#OH THEY MIGHT ALSO BE POTENTIALLY A LESBIAN BTW#i think i just tend to not date cis ppl entirely by accident#....feel free to rb if u want btw sorry for the rant
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rustytrident · 1 year
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seeing all these mixed opinions ab nightbringer and here i am giggling and kicking my feet cause we get to rizz up the demons all over again
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elcucurucho · 8 months
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between cucurucho making him delete his drill, foolish saying he wants to arrest him to become employee of the month, and the “friendly” mines fit and baghera left around his base tubbo is coming to the slow realization that literally everything and everyone on this island is Not Normal
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4seasonsofart · 6 months
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ingravinoveritas · 25 days
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Michael wanting to play the Master opposite David as the Doctor has me convinced that Michael has been mainlining smutty Doctor/Master fanfic and fanart and between that and his full-time job reading and writing Ineffable Husbands smut I really do wonder when he finds the time to breathe...
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croneboulder · 5 months
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if you’re wondering whether I’m still using weirdass non-divination decks for totally serious (ish) readings these days
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yes
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skyloftian-nutcase · 6 months
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Fluffvember prompt - Going on an adventure // Malon and Link go to Castle Town and chaos ensues
(Featuring Malon and Link in an established friendship with a hint of something more <3)
“Oh… I don’t know, Link, I can’t go like this!”
Link threw a confused look over his shoulder, feeling his chest bubbling with both excitement and bewilderment. “But Malon, you always look like a mess when you work in the field, anyway.”
Malon froze, cheeks as flushed as her red hair, eyes widening. Link stared at her a moment longer and then realized his mistake. Before he could hastily backtrack, though, Malon groaned.
“That’s the point though – I wanted to look nice today!”
“That’s not the point of today,” Link replied, easing Epona’s steady trot so he was alongside his friend. He reached out to her, only a little shyly, and twirled one of the little bits of hair spilling out of the cloth she’d tied around her head. “Besides, you always look beautiful when we go to Castle Town.”
Malon watched him for a moment, face softening, and she leaned in just enough that his finger brushed her cheek. Link took the invitation, letting his thumb trace along her face a moment before Epona nickered a little and the pair pulled away from each other. Malon huffed, “Oh, fine, Epona, I’ll stop complaining.”
Link chuckled and watched as she took off the handkerchief, revealing two braids she’d interwoven on each side of her head. They were a little frizzy, but they looked pretty nice, and it reminded him of some of the Gerudo warriors he’d interacted with in the past. Seeing as they’d been the inspiration for the hairstyle, he wasn’t surprised.
“Does it look okay?” Malon asked.
Link smiled. They’d already agreed that today was just for fun – no worries, no cares about chores or responsibilities or appearances – but he knew she still needed the reassurance. “It looks great.”
Malon beamed. “Okay. I always wanted to try it – the Gerudo have such pretty hairstyles! There’s no way I could ever have that fancy jewelry they wear but this’ll have to do.”
The pair continued their trek towards Castle Town in peace, and Link found himself almost giggling. Two days ago they’d agreed to take a trip to Castle Town purely for fun – no milk runs, no errands, no melancholy gazes towards the castle. This day was just for them to explore Castle Town in ways they hadn’t – Link recalled running around the area as a child, but as his journey had continued it had become less of a priority.
Not to mention seeing what Ganondorf had done to the place had messed with his mind a fair amount. He’d spent his first return to Castle Town after that just roaming around making sure everyone was alive. He still sometimes found himself staring into dark alleys too long, wondering if a ReDead was around the corner or if he’d find another dying soldier.
But today wasn’t about reassurances, nor was it filled with the busyness of doing work for Talon.
Link discovered, though, as they reached the moat, that he had no idea what to do if the day was just about him and Malon.
His friend seemed to retain her excitement, though, and she nearly leapt off her horse, handing the reigns off to a stableman at the gate. Link followed, smiling at her infectious cheer, but mind scrambling for ideas as to what they should do.
“Okay,” Malon said with a happy clap of her hands as they stood at the entrance to the city. “…Now what?”
Link couldn’t help the laugh that escaped him. Apparently he wasn’t the only one feeling a little lost.
“This is fine!” Malon argued at his cackling. “We said we’d make today about ourselves, and we will! Okay! So! What’s a place in Castle Town you always wanted to visit but never had time?”
Link hummed, thinking about it. “Bombchu bowling?”
Malon looked at him, nose scrunched. “I thought you had gone bowling?”
“Once,” Link answered before shuddering. “But one of the rounds… it was fun, but… well, maybe it’s changed since then.”
His friend continued to give him a bewildered expression before shrugging. “Well, let’s try it!”
Before Link had a second to register her words, she had grabbed him by the wrist and was dragging him through the market square. Running around with Malon without a care in the entire world was honestly more exhilarating than he had expected, and he laughed as he passed her, turning it into a race. Malon yelled in protest and the two practically barreled through the entrance and nearly ran over a patron already inside.
After a sheepish shrug from Link and an embarrassed apology from Malon, the two got their bombchus and headed to the bowling lane. Link recognized the first round immediately – they’d upgraded the device a little, and it looked like it had seen some wear and tear, but the blade trap still looked roughly the same as it had when he was a child.
He got by it just as easily as he had back then, too. Malon cheered him on with delight.
The next round, however…
“A cuccoo?” Malon questioned as the little feathered terror traipsed about. “What if it gets hurt?”
“They’re indestructible, Malon, don’t worry,” Link grumbled.
“Oh!” Malon scoffed. “They’re not and you know it! Is this why you stopped playing this game?”
Link sent the bombchu rolling, watching as it climbed the wall and made it into the next goal. “No…”
The destroyed wall crumbled, revealing the final round, and he saw his adversary, much to his dread. He felt the bottom drop out of his stomach, as if Ganondorf himself were standing there and cackling evilly. “That’s why.”
The final barrier to get through, beyond the blade trap and the cuccoo was a monstrous sized cuccoo, large enough to rival Link in height and twice his girth. Malon’s mouth dropped.
“What kind of cuccoo is that?” she asked.
“A demon,” Link answered.
“So did you never get passed it?”
“Passed it?!” Link repeated, motioning wildly at the beast. “Why would I even try? Do you want to anger that thing?! I had hoped I’d outlived it by now!”
“I’m still trying to figure out how it got so big,” Malon said thoughtfully, staring the monstrosity down.
“You’re not actually considering getting near it, are you?” Link asked worriedly.
“Well, the good news is that if the bombchus don’t bother the little one, this baby definitely won’t care if you miss!” Malon noted with a laugh. “But my goodness, it sure is big. You could ride it like a horse!”
Link felt the blood drain out of his face at the mere thought of it.
“Oh, stop being silly!” Malon huffed, nudging him aside with her hip. Electricity shot through him as she did so, unaware that he was now trying to catch his breath as she bit her lip in concentration to figure out how to aim the bombchu properly. When she released it, it managed to pass the blade trap and the little cuccoo, but the large one inhabited too much space to bypass. The bombchu let out a boom! and Malon gasped, covering her mouth.
The cuccoo clucked, unimpressed, before taking a small step to the left, foraging for food.
“I should’ve used that thing to fight Ganondorf,” Link muttered.
“We only have two left,” Malon noted, sounding a little disappointed. “We’ll have to try harder.”
Link looked between his friend and the cuccoo. This was definitely the stage that he had given up as a child – he’d had more pressing matters to attend to anyway, and there was no sense in risking his life when Hyrule needed to be saved. But now… watching the sad pout to Malon’s face emboldened him, just as seeing others in need always did.
Besides, the prize was a heart piece, a magical item that could grant some protection and healing enchantments. It could certainly come in handy. And it would look pretty on some jewelry for her.
Link took a fortifying breath and gently pushed Malon aside, taking the bombchus. “I’ll handle it.”
He calculated the path he would need to take carefully. Bypassing the first two obstacles was easy. He’d probably have to let the bombchu climb the wall to access the goal and get around the gigantic cuccoo.
Link released the bombchu and the pair watched it go. When it got through the cuccoo without a hitch, Link couldn’t help the little cheer that escaped him, only for his face to fall in disappointment as the bombchu exploded outside the goal.
Well… great. Now they only had one left.
A devious idea popped into his mind, and he paused, considering it. Doing what he was planning would technically be cheating, but… it was already an unfair advantage to have such an adversary on the playing field without a way to defeat it.
Handing the bombchu to Malon, Link said, “Wait for my signal and then send it off.”
“Your signal?” Malon repeated, confused. “What signal?”
Link surveyed the area, knowing he’d caught sight of it earlier—ah, there it was. A large pot, tucked into a corner, and filled with a familiar scent. He traipsed over to the pot and turned sharply, his shoulder hitting the rim and knocking it clean over.
Wheat grains spilled everywhere, and, as predicted, the cuccoos immediately squawked in excitement. Malon hastily let the bombchu loose as Link ran for his life from the oncoming feathery horde, yelping to avoid the frantic owner of the bowling alley. The bombchu hit its target, knocking the final wall away to reveal the heart piece awaiting its victors.
“Was that really the best way to do that?” Malon whispered as Link shrugged at the owner with a sheepish smile.
“Listen,” Link fired back quietly. “That blasted bird has been hoarding that heart piece for almost a decade. Which means people have been throwing bombchus at it for a decade. This way, the bird finally gets to retire from being attacked.”
Malon scrunched her nose in the way that he loved, the way she would when she was debating a matter. Her eyes narrowed looking at him, reading through his excuse but giving in to it nonetheless. “I suppose you’re right.”
The pair blinked as they went out into the sunlight once more, and, after Link offered a giggling Malon the heart piece, found themselves stuck again.
“Now what?” Link asked.
“This is ridiculous, we should’ve planned an itinerary,” Malon huffed with some amusement.
“I think that was against the whole idea of the day,” Link offered with a small smile.
“Well clearly we’re not good at being spontaneous!” Malon sighed.
That didn’t seem true at all, but Link wasn’t going to argue the point. What they clearly were awful at was not having something to do. Both kept themselves busy, either with farm work or adventuring, and that was the reason Talon had suggested they take a day off.
“You two work so much you’ll work your lives away,” he’d said. “Go to town and have fun! The ranch will still be here and intact when you get back.”
It had taken a few more days to convince Malon that her father wouldn’t be sleeping on the job before they’d finally agreed. And here they were, barely at midday and already over it.
“I see people throw rupees into the fountain,” Link commented. “They do it all the time. Maybe there’s something to it?”
“They just do that to make wishes,” Malon commented, though she guided him to the fountain nonetheless. “I’ve heard people talk about it. Dad and I did it once – I wished—”
Suddenly, she cut herself off, stopping short of the fountain. Link paused, peering around her shoulder to look at her face. Malon swallowed, chewing the inside of her lip and hastily moved ahead. “Well, never mind that, maybe we—”
In her haste, Malon lost her footing, tripping on uneven cobblestone, and she nearly faceplanted into the fountain itself. Link moved forward quickly to catch her, grabbing at the back of her shirt and instead successfully falling with her. He pulled her to him and turned to take the brunt of the fall, and they both nearly gasped in a lungful of water as the cold temperature shift shocked their systems. Thankfully, the fountain was shallow, and the pair instead lay half soaked in the water, blinking at each other in bafflement at what had just happened.
Malon laughed. Link found himself laughing too, especially at the exaggerated noises of surprise and irritation from the local women who had been gossiping while waiting in line for one of the market stands.
“Make a wish, fairy boy!” she giggled.
“I wish…” he started uncertainly, still chuckling and coughing slightly on water.
“Not out loud!” Malon interrupted, clamping a hand over his mouth and making them both fall into the water once more with a squeal. After a moment, though, she made a disappointed noise as she looked down at herself. “Oh, this dress is going to be ruined. As if I didn’t look questionable enough.”
“What are you talking about?” Link asked, leaning forward and putting her sopping wet hair over her shoulder. A mischievous glint shone in his eye and pulled at his lips. “You are… more beautiful than Princess Zelda.”
Malon stared at him a moment before catching the reference, poking his chest. “Oh, and you are just as handsome as the King of Hyrule.”
The pair stared at each other a moment longer before the façade fell apart as they burst into fits of laughter. The sour look from the familiar married couple who constantly subjected everyone to such sappy lines with their innumerable public displays of affection was definitely amusing enough to send Link into full-on hysterics.
Eventually, the cold water began to get a little too chilly, and the pair climbed out of the fountain (Link was definitely tempted to fish the rupees out of the water, but he felt that would be rude). They decided spending the afternoon laying outside the Temple of Time might be a good way to dry off and relax. Malon started to doze a little bit, but somehow the idea of sleeping by the temple left Link feeling far too ill at ease to actually get any rest. Instead, he settled for watching Malon and the occasional passerby who went to pray.
When evening fell, both Link and Malon realized they hadn’t eaten since breakfast, and decided dinner at one of the local restaurants was in order. Link had no idea how to order, having never been to a restaurant, and Malon was not of much help since she mostly spent her days at the ranch, but they managed to figure it out. When that was done, most of the townsfolk had begun to head home, and Malon wondered if they should as well.
At least until the stray dogs came out.
Gasping in delight, Malon reached down to pet one, and Link started to chase a few as more chased him. The two giggled and ran all over the city, watched only by the guards leading to the castle, who didn’t bother hiding their smiles.
It wasn’t until the moon was high in the sky that they realized their mistake.
“Wait!” Malon said, stopping suddenly. “The gate! The gate closes at sunset!”
Link froze. “Oh.”
They had to stay the night here.
Well. Unless…
“I could… there is a way…” Link said hesitantly. “But… only if you really want to.”
Malon looked around uncertainly. “Is it dangerous?”
“Not really, no.”
“Oh,” his friend wrung her hands nervously. “Can we? I don’t… I’ve never spent a night away from home. It’s silly, I guess, but…”
Link smiled. “Don’t worry, I got it.”
Pulling his ocarina from his pack (despite Talon’s insistence that he take no weapons to the city, Link had still grabbed all his supplies), he played the familiar song that had saved his neck plenty of times. The notes danced out with a little bit of hesitancy as he tried to remember the fingering on the instrument, but as he gained confidence and added the correct rhythm, he felt the ocarina warm with magic.
In the blink of an eye, the moon nearly plummeted to the horizon, making Link’s heart stop for just a second despite knowing it was going to happen, and the sun sprang up.
Malon’s jaw dropped. “How did you—?”
“Let’s go!” Link said with a laugh, grabbing her by the wrist. The citizens of Castle Town blearily peaked out of their homes, windows opening in as people peered around in confusion. When they reached the guard house at the gate, the soldiers were staring up at the sky, eyes wide.
Link cleared his throat. “Excuse me. Can you open the gate, please?”
The guard stared at him. “W-wh—but it’s—”
“It’s clearly day,” Link said innocently with a smile. “The gate’s supposed to open at sunrise.”
The guard couldn’t offer an argument, and so Malon and Link got their steeds. Epona seemed to be staring at Link judgingly, and he laughed at her expression. She’d seen him do this trick a number of times, after all, and it usually resulted in little sleep for either of them. Thankfully, that wouldn’t be the case today.
After all, he could make it night again once they got back to the ranch.
“Link, how did you do that?” Malon asked as they rode out into Hyrule Field.
“Just a trick I learned on the road,” Link tossed back casually.
“You know you can’t keep dodging my questions about that stuff,” Malon replied.
No, he supposed he couldn’t. But not today. Today was just for fun. And it had been fun. He hoped it could end that way too.
When they got back to the ranch, Link was endlessly entertained (and unsurprised) to find that Talon hadn’t even noticed the daylight and was instead snoring loudly in his room. Link played the ocarina again, and the sun and moon traded places once more.
“That’s… disorienting,” Malon noted as she stared at the sky.
“It could get that way, yeah,” Link huffed. When he looked back down he saw Malon staring at him. “Uh… what is it?”
Malon sighed, looking at the ground. “Nothing. I just… wish you’d talk to me. I know I’m just a dumb farm girl, but—”
“Malon,” he interrupted hastily. “I don’t think—you’re not—”
“I had fun today,” she interrupted with a small smile. “Did you?”
Link stumbled over all the words that had been spilling out of his mouth, and he took a breath, returning her smile. “Yeah… yeah, I did. And…”
He trailed off, uncertain how to continue. Malon watched him curiously, though she still held a degree of coolness after her previous statements. Clearly he’d hurt her feelings a little, and he felt awful for it.
He still struggled to figure out what to say. So instead, he stepped forward, planting a chaste kiss on her cheek. He felt her face grow warm under the touch, and the blush he saw confirmed it as he pulled away. “I thought today was nice too.”
Malon fanned her face with an exasperated, “Oh, you! That wasn’t funny!”
Link laughed nonetheless, pulling her into a hug, and she laughed with him, returning the embrace in full.
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hms-incorrect-quotes · 2 months
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Demon: Now, in exchange for this deal, I require...your SOUL.
Heart: (Alright, I'll go bring him over.)
Demon: ...wait, what?
*Heart walks out of frame.*
Soul, off camera: {Oh, hey Hea- ...wait, what are you doing- N-NO- HEART-!!}
*Heart walks back into frame, dragging Soul behind him.*
Heart: (Got him!)
Demon: ...you know what..? K...Keep him.
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aaandbackstabbed · 4 months
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Matilda McDuck and Goldie O’Gilt would be best friends
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natolesims · 7 months
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I tried to get past uni legally and it failed. I tried cheating and I also failed. You know what? Mint, baby, it's a sign. You're not meant to have quality education.
The moment Mint headed back home, a meteorite decided to crash rudely at the side of the road. I... I don't know how to take that.
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j-wilson-md · 7 months
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supernatural au where amara also resurrect john and adam (+michael)
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lesbianbanana · 6 months
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Nah because if the big 3 took the oath in 1939 that means from then to 1955, there still would've been the risk of the prophecy coming true so what happened to all those big 3 kids??
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irondad-defensesquad · 11 months
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peter, miles, and harley if they were ever in the same room together
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meownotgood · 1 year
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forcing aki to become my sugar baby/stay at home wife
i WILL treat him good
no because I need to make him my wife so badly and no-one understands
stay at home housewife aki... you spoil him so much and make sure he never has to worry about a single thing. he spends his time at home cooking or doing chores or learning and enjoying all of the hobbies he never got to when he was a devil hunter. sometimes he's almost overwhelmed with how much love and care you give him. he was certainly confused at the beginning of your relationship when you'd constantly shower him in gifts and presents and things he doesn't even know what to do with. but he's so grateful for you, he loves you and appreciates everything you've given him more than anything in the world. hopefully, he'll be able to give you a comfortable home and lots of love in return.
he's just so cute and husbandly I must put a big shiny ring on his finger at ONCE
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nanoyoru · 6 months
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I forgot I had this Pot/Chaos I drew like a week or so after I bought the game. I've always wanted to do the thing where I could ship my main with my partner's main in something and now I get to finally do it with Guilty Gear ehehe As soon as we locked down our mains I got to work o7
((Also initially I forgot the halo on HC when I posted it on Twitter but I added it for Tumblr release dfgjhgjfds)
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