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slapshot-to-the-heart · 4 years

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Four Times Nathan Proposed and One Time He Meant it

Hi! This is my humble contribution to @nolypats and @hockeyboysiguess campaign for Nathan MacKinnon for Hockey Boy of the Month. Please see their blogs for more info, also just because they’re amazing writers. This is my first time trying a 4+1, I thought it would be nice to put something out before the next chapter of Flatbush & Atlantic. It was genuinely so much fun writing this, so please let me know what you think!

Wine pairing: Rotari rosé. @hockeyboysiguess and I have started to pair all of our writings with their own wine, bearing in mind that neither of us knows anything about wine. It’s all about the VIBES.

4 times Nathan proposed and 1 time he meant it

The first time (February)

Jordan knocked on the door, a glass dish balanced precariously on her hip. She and Nathan tried to have a standing date night every week, something that wasn’t grabbing lunch when they were both free or meeting for coffee before she had to head to work and he went to practice. That was, unless there was a game. Or a roadie. Or a team event. So needless to say, the two had been a little strapped for “couple time” recently, and they were both feeling it. She had an article due the next day, a co-write about the use of illegal dark money in a recently-elected congressman’s campaign. Nathan had a long practice that morning and wasn’t feeling too up to anything that would require him to move too far from his couch.

He opened the door, giving her a quick kiss. “I pulled up a few movies I thought you might be into, but didn’t want to pick anything until you got here.”

“You’re so considerate, I think I’m going to swoon,” Jordan said.

Nathan shrugged. “I’ll catch you if you fall.” Deep down, he really was a romantic, though the boys would chirp him endlessly if they knew.

Jordan padded into the kitchen, setting the dish onto the counter and opening up the cabinet right above the toaster oven, grabbing two plates. Even apart from date night, it wasn’t uncommon for them to eat in; partly due to the fact that there were few things in this world Nathan loved more than being able to fly under the radar, something that was a little bit difficult to do when you wore the A for the Colorado Avalanche, but partly because in his own way, it was letting Jordan into his life. “What movies were you looking at?”

“Depends what you’re feeling,” Nathan replied. “We’ve got...Star Wars, Captain Marvel, and 10 Things I Hate About You.”

Her ears perked up. “The one with Heath Ledger?”

“That’s the one. Sound good to you?”

Jordan had always had a penchant for movies of the late-90s and early 2000s, especially if they were romcoms, and especially if said romcoms starred Julia Stiles. As a little girl, there was definitely more than once where she had herself entirely convinced that her life would turn out exactly like The Prince and Me. Minus, of course, the fact that the beginning of Paige and Edvard’s entire relationship was built on lies. Mainly, she was just really into crowns and big poofy dresses as a little girl. “Sounds good to me!” She said brightly. “You want a brownie?”

Nate craned his neck to look at her in the kitchen, looking expectantly at him with one hand holding a spatula. “You made brownies?”

Jordan giggled. “I did. I take it that’s a yes?”

“That’s a definitely, please, my God give me one right this second or I might combust.” She slid the plate onto the side table a minute later, grabbing two napkins. “Are these normal brownies?” Nathan asked, picking one up and inspecting it with a semi-confused look on his face.

“They’re triple-layer, it’s an old recipe for slutty brownies from when I was in college. Bottom’s cookie dough, then Oreos, then fudge brownie on top of that.”

Nate raised an eyebrow. “Slutty brownies?”

Jordan swatted at his shoulder. “I know it’s a weird name, just give them a chance. I know you’ve been feeling a little down with the losing streak, and thought you could use a pick-me-up. They were my go-to for breakups, always seemed to help the girls feel better, so I thought it might work for you too.”

He wouldn’t admit it, but Nathan’s heart skipped a beat with Jordan’s words. “Guess I’ll have to see,” he said, taking a bite out the corner. His face melted. “This is...literally the best thing I’ve ever tasted. Seriously, it’s so good. So good. Oh my God, marry me.”

Jordan flushed, turning to take a sip of water so he wouldn’t see. “I’m glad you like them.”

The second time (May)

It was 11:38 on a Friday night, and Jordan and Nathan were at a bar. To be precise, Jordan, Nathan, and pretty much the whole team were at a bar, plus what seemed like the entire population of Denver. Springtime meant playoff season for the NHL, and winning a series meant going out. Jordan normally had to pass whenever the team decided to hit up a bar or club after a win; as much as she would have liked to go, she was a journalist who kept a 9-5 job, which meant that she had to at least get some modicum of sleep if she was going to be able to function in the newsroom without an injection of caffeine straight into her veins. But it was the weekend, and she’d be damned if she was going to miss out on this.

For the most part, the fans weren’t making a fuss; there was the occasional picture taken or pat on the back for winning the conference semifinals for the first time in twenty years, but nothing out of hand. Sipping her Dark & Stormy, she looked fondly over at Nate, who was having what looked to be a very animated conversation with Burky. Already two and a half drinks in, Nathan was starting to act a little tipsy; while he was normally more reserved about public displays of affection, he kissed Jordan more than one as the night went on. Not like she was complaining. Picking up a refill from the bar, she scooted back into the booth next to Nate. He planted a messy kiss on her cheek. “Where’d you go, Jo?”

Jordan rolled her eyes. “Unlike some of us, I can’t just snap my fingers and have alcohol appear at will. I had to actually go to the bar for another drink,” she teased.

Nathan threw his head back laughing. “‘S’pose you’ve got a point there, babe.” He slung one arm over her shoulders. Jordan unconsciously leaned into his touch. “What’d you think of the game?” She wasn’t able to make it to every game, but was lucky that she could get down to the Pepsi Center more often than not. The Avalanche had beaten the Flames in 6, after dropping the first two games in Calgary and being pegged as another likely sweep, they had come back to win the next four and the series.

“Just trying to stroke your own ego, eh, MacKinnon?”

“Picking up some Canadian slang, eh, Murphy?”

She tilted her head. “Maybe, maybe not. But the game was amazing. You know that. You did amazing, Nate.” In the 3-1 win, Nathan had scored two points, an assist and an absolute beauty of a power-play goal that just barely squeaked into the top left corner above Rittich’s shoulder.

“Sure, maybe I do know,” Nathan admitted, “but it’s one thing hearing it from fans and the media and even my teammates. It’s another hearing it from you.” Jordan loved Nathan, but he wasn’t always the best at expressing his feelings out loud. She was the first one to say “I love you, to introduce him to her parents, to take just about any step forward in their relationship. It was something he was getting better at, slowly but surely, and it meant the world to Jordan that he was trying so hard. Maybe it was the liquor, or the atmosphere, or the excitement of the night, but it meant just as much to her to hear it as it probably did for him to say it.

Half an hour and several drinks later, the last few people left were trickling out. Most had carpooled to the bar, leaving their cars back at the arena to get the next day. Jordan would have ordered Nate an Uber and then just hitched a ride with someone else back towards her apartment west of downtown, but Nate was pretty far gone. And he was a cute drunk, all things considered, but she was on her way to sobering up and felt an obligation to at least get him in bed safe. Their car pulled up, Nathan clumsily ducking in ahead of her as she shut the door behind him, buckling first his seat belt then her own. They walked through his front door fifteen minutes later, Jordan dropping him off in his bedroom to get undressed before grabbing a glass of water and a bottle of Advil. Nathan was in his boxers when she walked in, struggling to pull a t-shirt over his head. Jordan laughed, walking to his side of the bed before gently tugging it, handing him the water and two Advil. “If you take it now, it’ll help with the hangover later.” Kissing his forehead gently, she turned to leave.

“Where are you going, Jo?”

She stopped at the door. “Home?”

“I want you to stay.”

She sighed gently, smiling at him. “Okay, I’ll spend the night.”

“No,” Nathan interrupted, grabbing her wrist lightly as she turned to grab one of his old World Cup shirts to sleep in. “Forever. I want you to stay forever.”

The third time (August)

It was the middle of August, and Jordan and Nathan were in Canada. He had invited her earlier in the summer to visit for a few weeks, and as soon as she got the time off approved, she booked her flight. Getting to Springhill wasn’t the easiest — she flew to Toronto, had a layover, flew to Halifax, then got picked up by Nate for the two hour drive to his hometown. He had flown out in June, about a month after the Avs lost to the Kings in the conference finals, so the couple hadn’t seen each other in nearly two months. Jordan wasn’t about to complain about a few more hours. His parents had been so generous letting her stay for two weeks, and hadn’t batted an eye when Nathan had moved her into his old room. “Just don’t wake us up,” his mom had said, causing Nathan’s cheeks to turn scarlet.

Jordan had met them a few times before; they had flown out for the All-Star game the previous January and had gotten together during the team Moms’ and Dads’ trips. And if she was around when Nathan was FaceTiming them, she always popped in for a few minutes to say hi. But she still hadn’t quite expected the ceaseless hospitality she had been offered over the past week. Maybe Canadians really were just that nice.

Halfway through Jordan’s trip, they decided to throw a barbeque. And by they, that meant it was Nate’s idea and he roped them all into helping. Jordan had already been introduced to a few of his old friends, they had gone out for drinks to the one bar in town on her second night, but she was excited to meet everyone else. His dad Graham was keeping an eye on the grill, Nathan had filled the cooler with drinks, and Jordan was helping his mom carry out the fruit bowl and salad to the backyard. Nathan ran up to his room to change right as people started trickling in, and came back to a yard full of family and friends. He craned his neck, trying to figure out where Jordan had wandered off too, before his sister pointed to where she sat with a few of his cousins.

Nathan opened his mouth, about to ask her something, when Jordan quietly brought a finger up to her lips. “She’s sleeping,” she whispered, gesturing to her arms, where a tiny baby was nestled, eyes firmly shut.

He remembered that his cousin Rachel had had a baby not too long ago, but didn’t realize she’d be old enough to travel yet. “Is this Natalie?” he asked quietly, sitting in the chair next to Jordan. Rachel nodded. For a few moments, Nathan was lost in the scene, lost in how damn perfect Jordan looked with a baby in her arms. They had spoken about those sorts of things — future things — enough to know that marriage and kids were something they both wanted, but this was the first time it had hit him, like really hit him, that that could be them down the line. Over by the fire pit, his mom watched, a soft smile on her face.

Nathan stood in the kitchen with his mom a few hours later, drying off dishes from the party. Handing a plate to him, Kathy shot a curious glance at her son, as if a thought had just popped into her mind that hadn’t been there before. Nate looked back at her, confused. “What is it, mom?

Kathy nodded out the window, where Jordan was laughing at a joke his dad had just made, balancing the last round of dirty plates to bring in on her arm. “When are you going to put a ring on it, Nathan?

Nathan wasn’t particularly prone to blushing, but he had been doing a lot of it lately. “I—uh—” His mom rested a hand on his shoulder with a knowing smile. “Okay, I’ll admit that I’ve been thinking about it.”

Kathy was beaming. “I knew it. When?”

“When am I going to propose?” She nodded. He shrugged. “I don’t know when it’s going to happen, Mom, but it’s going to. I’m going to marry that girl.”

The fourth time (November)

Jordan grimaced, breathing in sharply as she braced her elbows on her desk. Elisa, her friend who worked in the cubicle beside her, looked over, a concerned expression on her face. “You good, hun?”

Jordan nodded mechanically, opening a drawer and pulling out a bottle of ibuprofen, swallowing three with a gulp of water. “Yeah, I should be fine. I should be starting my period in the next day or two, so I’m pretty sure it’s just cramps.”

“Are they usually this bad though?” Elisa had always been a worrier.

She shook her head. “No, not since I went on birth control a few years ago, but who knows. The ibuprofen will help, and it’s probably normal anyways. I’m sure it’ll go away.”

It didn’t go away. Two hours later, when Elisa was finishing up the last paragraph of her analysis of the Broncos’ new coaching hire, Jordan suddenly shot up from her desk, running at breakneck speed towards the women’s bathroom with a queasy look on her face. Elisa followed, bursting through the door to the unmistakable sharpness of vomit. She knelt down next to Jordan, pulling her hair back with the spare scrunchie she kept on her wrist. “Jordan? Are you okay?”

Jordan shook her head. “I feel awful, El.”

Eliss touched the back of her hand to Jordan’s forehead. “You’re warm. Have the cramps gotten better.”

“Worse,” Jordan admitted, wiping at the beads of sweat that had started to accumulate on her forehead.

Elisa pulled out her phone from her back pocket. “I’m calling an ambulance. I don’t think this is cramps, Jo.”

Jordan didn’t have the strength to argue, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to anyways. The ambulance arrived ten minutes later, carting Jordan off to Denver Health Medical Center. “Any chance you could be pregnant?” one EMT asked.

“I could be, but I shouldn’t. I’m on birth control and my boyfriend always uses protection,” Jordan said weakly. The EMT made a scribble on her paper. She barely registered pulling into the hospital, nurses pulling her into the ER, or a doctor wheeling in an ultrasound machine. She was conscious enough to recite her name, date of birth, and insurance number before being taken into the operating room, and then a mask was placed over her nose and her world went dark.

The first thing Jordan did when she woke up was check the clock in her room. It was 3; from what little she remembered, she had been taken to the hospital sometime a little after noon. “Oh, thank God,” she heard from her left side. She recognized that voice. It was Nathan’s voice. He grabbed her hand — the one that didn’t have an IV drip in it — and kissed it quickly, smoothing back the pieces of her hair that had come out of the hair tie. “Elisa called during practice, and she told me what happened, but she didn’t even know what happened, and then I left and drove over here, but then—”

Jordan laughed softly, feeling a dull pain in her lower abdomen. “It’s fine, Nate, I’m fine. What happened, anyways? I don’t remember anything after I went into surgery, I have no idea what it was even for.”

“You had appendicitis, your appendix was about two seconds away from bursting.”

Jordan let out a low whistle. “Glad that didn’t happen. Hey,” she added as an afterthought, “I thought visiting hours here didn’t start until 4?” Jordan had visited a college friend of hers who had had a baby a few weeks prior, and could have sworn that she wasn’t let in until later.

Nate smiled sheepishly. “Yeah, they do. I couldn’t even figure out what room you were in at first. They wouldn’t tell me anything, so I told them I was your fiancé.”

“Oh, did you now?”

Nathan rubbed his thumb over her finger. Her ring finger. “I mean, it’s pretty much true. All I’ve got left to do now is ask you.”

“And get the ring,” Jordan added.

“Nope.”

+1 (January)

Family skates had quickly grown to be one of Jordan’s favorite parts of the season. She had loved the first one, but had felt just a tiny bit out of place; her and Nathan had only been dating for a little over six months, and it seemed like almost everyone else had known each other for years. But she’d forged some amazing friendships with other WAGs over the past year, trading babysitting duties for pies and meeting to watch the game while the boys were on a road trip, sharing new Spotify playlists and learning how to support each other along the way. The team had become her second family, even though her parents only lived an hour and a half away.

Jordan had been a competitive figure skater throughout high school and into college, so she was no stranger to the ice. She obviously couldn’t get out nearly as often as she had before, but her skates still fit and she could still land a triple salchow after warming up. She and Nate had been skating around for an hour or so, taking a break after some “friendly competition” where Josty had made the mistake of challenging Jordan to a race around the rink. She beat him by two seconds.

Jordan unscrewed the top of her water bottle, taking a few grateful sips before putting it back in her bag. “Babe!” Nate called from a few rows away, where some of the younger kids were gathered next to what looked like pastels. “Want to face paint?”

She smiled, raising her eyes playfully as she popped on her blade guards and walked over towards the bench. “You sure about that one, MacKinnon? I’m not much of an artist.”

He nodded enthusiastically. “It’s okay, I bet you’ll be great!” He was so sweet for believing in her.

“Alright,” Jordan said, straddling the bench and picking up the box. “What would his highness like for the design? Bear in mind you’re working with a beginner here.”

“Butterfly!” He chirped excitedly. “There’s been a whole bird and insect theme going on here,” he pointed at the kids’ cheeks, covered in bees, ladybugs, and one demonic-looking...crow? Was it a crow? Did they even get crows at this time of year? “and I wouldn’t want to break the trend.”

“We couldn’t have that,” Jordan agreed. Ten minutes later Nathan had a very blue, barely-acceptable-looking butterfly on his right cheek, but he was beaming like the sun as soon as he pulled up his camera to look at it. “I love it, Jo. Thank you,” Nate said, giving her a quick kiss.

Activities wrapped up not too long after, and Jordan and Nathan walked out of the rink hand-in-hand towards his car. They had moved in together two months earlier, and Jordan had been more than happy to move out of her tiny studio into Nate’s giant apartment, where you could see the Rockies from the rooftop on clear days. Plus, his building allowed dogs. As Nathan drove home, one hand on the steering wheel and the other tangled with hers by the center console, Jordan looked over at him, with the little blue butterfly on his cheek, and she suddenly felt so unbelievably happy. So unbelievably full. It went without saying that she loved Nate. She loved him like she had never loved anyone before, and never would again.

At the same time, Nate’s heart was beating faster than it ever had in his life. He wasn’t scared, he wasn’t surprised, but he had just realized something. He already knew that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with Jordan. Nathan had realized that months ago. And he hadn’t been lying at the hospital, he had already bought the ring. But Nathan wanted everything to be perfect when he proposed; it couldn’t be rainy outside, because what if she wanted pictures? It couldn’t be too soon after her older brother’s wedding, because then she might think that was the reason why. It couldn’t be in the summer, because then he’d go back to Nova Scotia for the summer and his mom might scalp him for leaving his fiancée in another country. But, Nathan realized as they pulled into the underground lot, there never was going to be a perfect time. He knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that he wanted to be Jordan’s husband. There shouldn’t be anything stopping him. There wasn’t anything stopping him.

“I’m going to run to the bathroom,” Nate said as Jordan slipped off her shoes. She nodded. Nathan went up the stairs, but past the bathroom. He walked into their bedroom, into his closet, to the shoebox that had his old atom league medals. He grabbed the velvet box, opening it and taking one last look before taking a deep breath and putting it in his pocket.

“You want to watch SVU reruns?” Jordan asked as he ambled back into the living room.

His mouth opened and closed like a fish. “Uh—can I say something?”

Jordan looked over. “Yeah, go ahead? We can totally watch something else if you’re not feeling Law & Order, I think I saw Chopped on the Food Network, or Jurassic Park is halfway through…” She trailed off.

Nathan shoved his hands in his pockets, turning the ring box over and over. He bit his lip. “You know how much you mean to me, right?” Jordan nodded slowly. “When I met you, I wasn’t looking for anything. I had just had my heart broken by someone who I thought would be my forever, but then you came into my life and suddenly...suddenly, it all made sense. I thought I knew love, I thought I knew what it was to be in love, but I didn’t, really. Not until you. You bring me down to earth, Jordan, when I’m too far in my head. I know you’re on my team even when we’re losing, even when it seems like nothing in my life is going right I know you’ll always be there to pick me up when I fall. And I don’t ever want to take that for granted. You challenge me in the best way, you always push me to be a better partner, a better teammate, and a better man. I wouldn’t be where I am today if it weren’t for you.” Jordan was tearing up, starting to figure out where his whole speech was going and hoping beyond hope that she was right.

“I know I’m not always physically here, but I promise to always be there for you, Jordan. I’ll hold you when you’re crying, I’ll buy your favorite chips when we’re out, I’ll pay the utility bills because I know you’re terrible with remembering dates. It was eight months in when I realized you were the one.” Nathan bent down on one knee. One of Jordan’s hands was over her mouth, the remote having long since been abandoned on the couch. “I can’t wait to see where we go, Jordan. I can’t wait to get a nice house with a big backyard, go down to the animal shelter saying we’re only going to adopt one dog but come back with three. I can’t wait for the day you tell me you’re pregnant, and we get to hold our child for the first time and I get to see you be a mother. I can’t wait for us to start our lives together. I can’t wait for you to be Jordan MacKinnon.” He opened up the ring box. “Will you marry me?”

Jordan fell on her knees, hands on both sides of Nathan’s face. “Yes.”

#hockey imagine #hockey smut #nhl imagine #nhl smut #nathan mackinnon #hockey #hockey imagines #hockey writing #nhl #nhl imagines #nhl writing

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choicesfanatic86 · 4 years

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Almost: Chapter 7

DISCLAIMER: All characters belong to Pixelberry Studios, except characters unique to my story. Those belong to me. ;)

PAIRINGS: Liam x Riley (MC)

SUMMARY: Riley Lawson didn’t believe in second chances, until one night a face from her past makes a shocking reappearance in her life.

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06/08/2020 - Ahhh here it is! A long awaited updated. I’m always so busy, but with summer starting and some much needed vacation days on the horizon, I’m updating everything. If Only & TTS will be coming along shortly. :)

Thank you! As always if you want to be tagged, send me a message!

Chapter 7

It didn’t take long for Riley to jump into action when Liam agreed to her offer to see the Statue of Liberty. She started to text furiously on her phone, and when she wasn’t getting a response quick enough, she resorted to actually calling up the friends she knew would still be up at that hour. After all, she lived in the city that never slept, and a good chunk of her friends were in line with that mentality. At first it seemed like she wouldn’t have any luck making her plan happen, but eventually one of her friends pulled through. Matt Dennison had owed her a favor from ages ago. She had never expected to actually stake a claim on said favor, but here she was at some god awful hour staring at the boy that had stolen (and ultimately broken) her heart eight years ago, and all she wanted to do was make his dream come true. So, desperate times called for desperate measures and she had absolutely no qualms about waking Matt up from his beauty sleep.

Matt was a frequent patron of the bar, and he and Riley had struck up a bit of a friendship. He was a lot nicer than a lot of the regulars, because he never tried to make any sort of pass at her. That in and of itself had won him a bunch of brownie points. One night last October, an out of towner had come into the bar already reeking of alcohol. Daniel had refused to serve him the three tequila shots he had ordered because he couldn’t bring himself to serve the guy any more alcohol when he had already stumbled into the bar clearly intoxicated. The out of towner didn’t take too kindly to being told no and started to scuffle with another patron, sucker-punching the guy in the stomach for no apparent reason. Seeing this, Matt tried to intervene. His Good Samaritan behavior landed him with a black eye and a set of handcuffs. It didn’t matter who did what, when the cops had shown up; everyone got taken in, leaving Matt in a very serious bind. He had no money to post bail, and everyone he thought would come through hadn’t even returned his calls. Riley swung by the jail at the end of her shift in the hopes of explaining things to the arresting officers. She was an eye-witness after all, but no one wanted to take her statement. She couldn’t see Matt spending the night in jail, so she decided to come to his rescue. She bailed him out and posted the thousand dollar fee without even spending a second to think about it. Ever since then, he had been eternally grateful to her. A month later, he paid her back in full plus interest and told her that if she ever needed anything, he’d make it happen for her. She had brushed the comment off, never really intending to take him up on her offer, but tonight . . . tonight she was ready to cash in.

Matt owned a small boating business that offered tours of the harbor. It was a great way to get some pretty nice scenic photographs of the New York City skyline. His business wasn’t at all like the fancy ferry lines that also ran their own tours out of the docks, but Matt’s tours were a whole lot more inspirational and weren’t the cookie-cutter spiels that the other ferries tried to sell. It also helped that he didn’t price gouge the hell out of the tours that he sold. So, although he wouldn’t be a multi-millionaire anytime soon, he did all right for himself. He had always offered to take Riley on a free tour . . . but he probably never meant for it to be well after midnight. Regardless, he had come through for her, and was on his way to the docks to take them to see Lady Liberty in all her glory.

“Ha!” She exclaimed giddily. “You’re in luck,” she beamed, a large grin forming on her lips. “My friend Matt is going to help us out,” she explained. “The thing is . . . we’re going to have to walk . . .” she said hesitantly. “It’s about a twenty minute trek to the docks. Think you can handle that,” she looked down at his dress shoes.

“Perhaps I should be asking you that question,” he motioned to her high heels. “This isn’t the easiest terrain to take a hike on,” he reasoned. “Especially in those,” he pointed out.

“I’ll be fine,” she said confidently, brushing off his concern. “I’m a New Yorker, remember? Walking around in heels is a thing here,” she chuckled.

Liam glanced back briefly at his friends. They were still entirely wrapped up in what they were doing. They didn’t even seem to notice that Liam and Riley had wandered off on their own.

“Do you think they’ll be angry that I left without telling them?” He asked hesitantly.

Riley took a quick peek behind her shoulder. She didn’t know them well enough to say either way, but based off of the earlier conversation that she had with Drake, this was definitely something that Liam needed to do – regardless of whether or not his friends would be angry with him. He needed to put himself first for once in his life, especially if, for whatever reason, he wouldn’t have the opportunity to come to New York again. She shook her head. “I’m pretty sure they’re having a grand old time without you,” she murmured.

Liam’s eyes shifted to their direction once more. Riley could see the hesitation building in his eyes. He was having second thoughts about the whole thing, and she couldn’t let that happen. “Hey . . . don’t look so guilty,” she nudged his shoulder playfully. “You wanted to see the Statue of Liberty, and it’s going to happen,” she assured him. “Besides, if they get antsy and want to head back to the hotel, you left the car with them. You can always meet back with them later if they’re still on the whole party roll,” she reasoned.

Liam nodded, finally pulling his gaze away from them. “You’re right. I should take full advantage of the fact that this is my last night in New York . . . and . . . well I’ll have more responsibilities after I go back, so maybe it won’t be so bad being a little selfish tonight,” he said simply.

Riley pondered his words thoughtfully for a moment. Oh right, he was getting married. He wouldn’t just be able to hop on a plane on a whim. He’d have a wife’s opinion to consider. She thought on his words again, and she couldn’t help but think that he was giving his words served more as a confidence booster for him to actually go through with it he was trying to rationalize his decision to take her up on her offer. The Liam she knew in Germany would never turn down an adventure, so it was a bit surprising to see him behave so cautiously. She supposed getting older and being swamped down with more responsibilities had changed his outlook a bit. It was strange to think that over the years she had become more adventurous and outgoing. She supposed that it was her time with him in Germany that had really allowed her to branch out and experience new things.

“Exactly,” she agreed.

They walked in silence for a few minutes. She could feel his gaze wander over her a few times as they walked, and she briefly wondered what was running through his head as they walked together side by side.

“So, why did you stay in New York?” He asked, trying to engage her in small chit-chat.

“What do you mean?” She looked back at him.

“Well . . . you weren’t always a New Yorker, right? If I remember correctly, you were from Virginia?” He said thoughtfully. “Or was it New Hampshire,” he said uncertainly.

“West Virginia,” she corrected him. She licked her lips anxiously. “It just wasn’t home anymore,” she shrugged. “I made a life for myself here,” she responded simply.

“Right. West Virginia,” he nodded. “How are your parents doing? Did they end up moving out to New York, too?”

Riley stiffened at the mention of her parents. They had a falling out shortly after she came back to the States from Germany. She had been devastated after everything that happened there, and she had hoped that going home and spending time with her family would help her clear her head, pull the shambles of her life together, and figure out where to go from there . . . but it hadn’t. Instead, she came home to judgment and disappointment, and she felt her life fall apart all over again.

“We don’t talk anymore,” she shrugged, becoming a bit uncomfortable.

Liam’s eyes widened in surprise. “You don’t?” He paused for a moment, trying to formulate the right words. “I’m sorry. You were always so close to them,” he said, a look of regret in his eyes. “Did something happen?”

Riley frowned. She hadn’t intended for the conversation to stray in this direction. It wasn’t something she was necessarily ready or willing to talk about. “We had a disagreement about my life choices,” she said vaguely. “I did what I thought was best, and they didn’t agree with me,” she shrugged. “Case closed,” she said coldly.

Liam studied her carefully. She hated the way he was analyzing her. She knew he could probably sense that she was keeping something from him, but in that moment, she just couldn’t bring herself to get into things right then and there.

“I just find it so odd that you wouldn’t be in contact with them,” he frowned. “You spoke with them nearly every single day while we were in Germany . . .” he trailed off.

“Well, Germany was a long time ago, Liam,” she said a bit shortly. She started to feel tears form in her eyes. He was right. She had been exceptionally close to her parents, especially her mother. It killed her to not have a relationship with them, especially after everything she had been through. She just couldn’t bring herself to forgive them after everything that was said and done.

She turned to Liam, ready to tell him to just back off and drop the issue about her parents, but when she met his gaze, she saw the concern in his eyes. She bit her lip. He was worried about her. Even after all this time, there was still a part of him that wanted to make sure she was all right. She debated letting everything that was on her mind flood out from her right then and there, but she knew that once she spilled her heart out to him, there would be no taking the words she said back. She’d likely never see him again after tonight. So why should she bother? What good would it do except to stir up unnecessary pain and heartache of something that had long happened years ago?

He slumped his shoulders a bit, the concern never leaving his face. “I’m sorry. I didn’t intend to upset you,” he said quietly.

She shrugged. Her family was a sensitive issue. He was right. They had been exceptionally close. Her parents had always been wonderful . . . until, well, they weren’t. She remembered the screaming battle they had when she had gone back to West Virginia. Her life had changed so much in a few short months, and they couldn’t understand that she was her own person . . . who was able to make her own decisions. The life she had decided to lead didn’t correlate with the live they had envisioned for her.

“If it makes you feel any better, I’m at odds with my family as well,” he sighed.

“Not speaking to them?” She asked in surprise. Liam had always spoken very highly of his parents. He admitted that they were a bit overprotective, but she had never gotten the feeling that things were strained between them.

“Oh no, we’re speaking . . . let’s just say that it’s all . . . an act,” he sighed wearily. “I play my part, and hell doesn’t get raised,” he said vaguely.

“That sounds like there’s a story there,” she commented. Her curiosity was piqued. Just moments ago she had wanted him to butt out of her personal affairs, yet here she wanted to know about his own rift with his parents.

“You have no idea,” he sighed as he tried to keep pace with her. “So whatever happened with your parents may be minuscule compared to what I’ve been dealing with my father and Regina,” he sighed in frustration.

Riley snorted. “I doubt that.” She sighed, letting the topic drop. Talking about her parents always put her in a foul mood, and she had a sneaking suspicion that Liam now felt the exact same way about his parents. “We’re here,” she motioned to the rickety dock in front of her.

He looked at her in surprise. “Really? That didn’t take too long . . . this doesn’t really look like an actual dock area,” he said as he looked around.

“That’s because it’s not,” she explained. “Well, it used to be, but no one ever really uses it anymore. This is one of my favorite spots in the city,” she said quietly as they waited for Matt to show up. The dock overlooked he entire city’s skyline. Over time, newer docking areas were built on the opposite side of the river, and boats started to frequent the newer docking stations. The older docks sort of just got left behind. Riley gazed out into the night sky - the different towers were all lit against darkness. There was faint music playing in the background from one of the yachts off in the distance. It was actually a really nice spot to just think. Riley supposed that’s why she had enjoyed it so much. Because no one really used the dock anymore, there wasn’t really all of the hustle and bustle like the main dock areas.

“I can see why you like it so much,” he said, gazing out into the sky. “The view is spectacular.”

She nodded in agreement.

“Now what?” He asked, looking around.

“We wait,” she said simply.

“For?”

“A magical boat I’ve summoned just for you,” she smiled. “Just enjoy the moment, will you? The old Liam would have embraced every second of this adventure so that he could remember everything about it,” she said.

“Yeah, well the old Liam also learned that sometimes being adventurous can lead to loads of trouble,” he sighed. “The new Liam tends to err on the side of caution nowadays.”

“That’s too bad,” she said sullenly. “Old Liam was a pretty fun guy,” she said nostalgically. “So . . . what made you want to see the Statue of Liberty? You talked a lot about it back then, but I don’t think you ever told me why you wanted to visit it so much.”

He shrugged lightly. “You of all people should know why.”

She arched her eyebrow in question. “What do you mean?”

“She represents something that I so desperately want,” he sighed.

She looked at him curiously. “Freedom?” She guessed.

He nodded sullenly.

She furrowed her forehead in confusion. “And why would you want freedom, Liam?”

He stuffed his hands in his pocket, his eyes gazing out onto the skyline. “It’s not easy when your life is under a microscope,” he explained.

“I’m not sure I understand,” Riley said as she stepped closer to him.

“The life I lead is under constant scrutiny. Every decision . . . every action may reflect poorly on myself and my family. Something I’m never allowed to forget no matter how badly I might want to,” he said sadly.

“Liam . . .I’m sorry . . . I didn’t know things were that difficult for you,” she cleared her throat. “That sounds awful,” she reached out placing her hand lightly on his shoulder. “It must be difficult for your fiancé to live that sort of life, too,” she commented.

There eyes meet for a lingering moment, before Liam tears his gaze away. “Riley, I – “

The horn from the boat blares, and a man dressed in worn overalls and a torn up hat waves haphazardly at them from the side. The moment between them wanes as Matt pulls the boat as closely to the dock as possible

“Riley!” He called out to her. “When I said I owe you one, this wasn’t what I had I mind,” Matt chuckles loudly. “Leave it to you to call someone at one o’clock in the morning. I had to refuel and everything,” the man bellowed.

Liam’s words became forgotten as Riley snapped back into high gear remembering the mission set before them. “I know! You’re the only one who picked up,” she shrugged. “I know this is a bit . . . unusual . . . but my friend here leaves tomorrow and he’s never seen Lady Liberty. We’re hoping you can make that happen for him?” She asked.

“Of course I can make it happen,” he smiles broadly. “Just wish we were doing this a tad bit later in the morning than one o’clock,” he laughed. He started to pull down a plank onto the deck so that Riley and Liam could board the ferry.

“Is that?” Liam looked at her with concern.

“Our ride,” she nodded.

Liam looked at the large, rickety ferry, his face turning into a frown. “Are you sure he’s reputable?” He looked at Matt and the ferry with skepticism. “I mean . . . I hear the horror stories about these sorts of situations that go awry,” he whispered. “I have a . . . thing about boats,” he trailed off.

“Beggars can’t be choosy, Liam. Besides, I know Matt looks a bit rough around the edges, but he’s a decent guy . . . Just don’t think about how it all looks . . . push that aside and think about the bigger goal . . . you want to see Lady Liberty don’t you?”

“Well, yes,” he nodded. “I just didn’t imagine it would be on this sort of vessel.”

“It’s now or never, Liam. You leave tomorrow. Who knows if you’ll ever make it back to see her,” she motioned behind her. “Do you really want to live with the regret of not having at least tried? What if your wife doesn’t want to travel to the States? Or if you have kids right away? This could be your last shot to ever see something as grand as the Statue of Liberty. Are you really going to let the shape of Matt’s boat turn you around?” she asked.

He shook his head. “I suppose not,” he admitted.

“Excellent,” she beamed. Hop on. You’re about to see Lady Liberty in all her glory.”

As Riley and Liam boarded, Matt pushed the ferry into high gear. “Hang on, guys. Next stop, the Statue of Liberty.”

They stood on the edge of the ferry, and after ten minutes of not so smooth sailing, they could see the Statue of Liberty gleaming out in the distance.

“Wow,” Liam murmured.

“Aren’t you glad you decided to take a chance?” Riley chuckled as her own gaze lingered over the majestic beauty of the statue.

He nodded, his eyes never straying from the sight of Lady Liberty in all her glory. “She’s amazing,” he murmured.

“Isn’t she?” Riley sighed, she too couldn’t help but be mesmerized by the sight of her.

The boat neared closer and closer to the statute’s base, and Liam’s smile was absolutely blinding. He pulled his cell phone out, snapping different photos at different angles. He was acting as if he’d never see it again.

Riley paused with the thought. That very well could be true. After all, she had said the very words to him only moments ago. What if he never did come back to New York? Let alone back to America? Whatever it was that waited for him back home seemed like an anchor. At least, that’s how he seemed to describe it. Life under a microscope? She couldn’t imagine spending every single day of her life worrying about what other people were thinking about her choices. It made her wonder why Liam’s life was like that. Had he been some sort of celebrity back home? Riley watched him with intrigue as Liam happily gazed up at the towering beauty. For a brief moment, she saw the carefree Liam she had fallen for back in Germany. She didn’t see the boy who broke her heart and left her without even a single word. Instead, she saw a man, so bogged down with secrets and troubles that such a simple thing like seeing the Statue of Liberty brought him so much joy. She almost felt sorry for him. How troubled was his life that he couldn’t even steal a few moments of enjoyment for himself back home?

“I didn’t think you could pull this off. I should have known better,” he let a small chuckle escape as he turned to face her.

Riley snapped out of her thoughts. “What do you mean?” She looked at him a bit puzzled.

“Admittedly, I may have had some skepticism about this whole thing working,” he smirked. “Especially when I saw the state of his . . . . boat,” he cringed looking around.

“It floats,” she chuckled. “And it’s given you the chance to see your life-long dream,” she eyed him. “Be grateful,” she chuckled, nudging his side slightly.

“I am,” he held his hands up. “I just . . . well, I suppose I haven’t done anything this . . . impulsive in quite some time,” he mused. “It feels odd.”

“Yeah . . . tonight is full of impulsivity for you,” she smirked.

Liam burst out in a hearty laugh. “Says the girl who doesn’t have an impulsive bone in her body.” He rolled his eyes jokingly.

The playfulness in his tone caught Riley off guard. Riley feigned offense. “I’ll have you know I’ve done tons of impulsive things in my life. You haven’t seen me in eight years,” she pointed out.

“I suppose . . . I guess I have a hard time reconciling the you now with the you back then,” he shrugged.

She looked up at him, completely understanding what he meant, and nodded.

“Hey . . . “ he said a bit excitedly. “Do you remember back in Germany when you tried to convince me that you were a rebel? You told me about this time when you were in high school and you held a protest against your schools’ science program because one of the teachers scheduled an assignment to dissect a rat?”

Riley’s face flushed in embarrassment. “Of all the things to remember, that is something you bring up?” She sighed heavily. “Hey, don’t judge me for the stupidity of my youth,” she forced a chuckle, but the embarrassment was still going strong. “At that point in my life . . . yeah that had been the craziest, most rebellious thing I had ever done. You were always so worldly and daring . . . I just wanted to impress you,” her blush deepening.

Liam chuckled more. “Oh, you’ve certainly proven to me that you have a rebellious streak, Riley Lawson. You’re certainly a lot more adventurous and fascinating than I remember,” he commented.

“And you’re not,” she mused. “The Liam I knew eight years ago would have dropped everything at the chance for an adventure. He wouldn’t even think about a rough looking boat stop him,” she pointed out.

Liam’s smile and playful demeanor changed suddenly. His back stiffened, and eyes saddened a bit. “I’m afraid that Liam grew up a bit over the years,” he murmured.

The boat began to take a slow u-turn, heading back in the direction they had come from. Riley looked up toward Matt in the captain’s control cabin. “Going back so soon?” she called up to him.

He nodded from the control cabin. “My first tour is at 8 am tomorrow. Don’t want to be out too late so that I sleep through it,” he said. “Don’t worry, next time your friend comes back to New York, I’ll give him the full tour . . . during the waking hours of course,” he laughed.

With Matt’s words, Liam’s shoulders slumped a little.

Riley nodded slowly. “Got it. Thanks for bringing us out here, Matt. Now I feel like I owe you one for waking you up at this hour,” she chuckled lightly. Matt waved her off, before turning his attention back to the wheel.

“Well, I suppose our adventure has come to an end,” Riley sighed. “But at least you got to see her . . . maybe not all up in person, but now you can go back home with a pretty cool story from your bachelor party. It would totally blow to go back home and tell everyone that you sat at a table in a club by yourself all night while your friends partied without you,” she joked.

She turned to face him when he didn’t respond and noticed the forlorn look on his face. “What’s wrong? I was just joking about the whole club thing . . .” she trailed off.

“I just can’t believe its over,” he said quietly. He sighed heavily as he leaned against the boat’s railings. “I always thought I’d have more time.”

“Hey, maybe you can convince your fiancé to come to New York for your honeymoon . . . unless that’s already planned . . . then maybe you guys can plan a vacation or something down the road?” She tried to say cheerily.

“I’m never coming back to New York, Riley. At least not without being on a tight leash,” he raised his voice. There was an underlying sense of anger in his words. It took Riley aback.

She paused, not really understanding the shift. He had been so happy only minutes ago. “Liam, you’re being really cryptic. You sound as if you’re going to be put to death once you return home,” she said concerned. “I mean . . . okay maybe that’s a bit dramatic . . . but still. Do you not want to go back? I know this isn’t my place to say anything, I don’t know what you’re going through right now, but if I were the one getting married, I’d be over the moon with excitement. And it is clear to me that you’re not. I don’t know if it’s cold feet or something else, but it’s not fair to your fiancé if you suddenly don’t want to get married. Tell her. Talk to her about how you’re feeling,” she reasoned.

“If only it were that simple,” he sighed.

Riley’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion. “Why isn’t it simple? I feel like I’m missing something major here, and I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s going on,” she said angrily.

“Do you remember my brother Leo?”

Riley nodded. “He was a thrill seeker, right? Always bouncing from country to country . . . He was always a bit reckless about it though,” she nodded. “Well, so you told me,” she shrugged. “What has he got to do with anything?”

“Well, let’s just say he hasn’t changed and his recklessness has forced me into a bit of a predicament,” he sighed. “His choices inadvertently solidified mine, if that makes any sense,” Liam murmured.

“It doesn’t,” Riley shook her head.

“My family is important to me, Riley. Our legacy . . . the business that we are in . . . all of it . . . it means the world to me. My brother . . . well, he’s never been one to follow the rules. I envy him a bit. One of us had to become the responsible one, especially after . . . well, let’s just say that my family went through a rough patch and needed all of us to step up and help. Leo couldn’t . . . more appropriately, didn’t want to do it. He enjoyed his adventures too much, and being stuck to one place for the rest of his life would have killed him. So . . . my family turned to me.”

“Liam, that still doesn’t make much sense,” she murmured.

“Getting ready to depart,” Matt yelled from up above, interrupting their conversation.

Riley’s looked up and saw that they were pulling in near to where Matt had picked them up from earlier. Her heart suddenly felt very heavy. She didn’t want this night to end. Not when something was clearly bothering Liam. How crazy was it that after all this time, she still felt something for him? A sense of protectiveness . . . a sense of worry. She paused, was she falling for him again? No. She shook her head, trying to make sense of everything that was happening.

“Forget I mentioned anything,” Liam said, clearing his throat. “I got a bit sentimental back there, and my judgment became clouded. I’ve got a lot on my mind, and shouldn’t have burdened you with my problems,” he explained.

“Liam,” she started before Matt blew the boat’s horn.

“Alright, guys. Back to land,” he called out to them.

Riley looked back up and saw that they had docked, and Matt was already situating the plank to let them off. Liam was waiting patiently and stepped hurriedly off the vessel as soon as the plank was down. She headed toward them, and clasped Matt on the shoulder.

“Thank you, for doing this,” Riley said softly. “I know I mentioned this before, but he has wanted to see the Statue of Liberty for ages . . .” she sighed.

“He got his wish,” Matt nodded toward Liam. “But something tells me he’s wishing for something else now,” Matt nudged Riley’s shoulder.

Riley looked at him puzzled. “What?”

“Uh . . . you and he? Aren’t you a thing?” Matt asked.

“Nope, it’s nothing like that. We just knew each other from way back when. It was purely a coincidence to run into him tonight,” she brushed off his hinting with a wave. She didn’t need another person’s thoughts adding to her own jumbled emotional mess.

“Well, I’m thinking he’s seeing you in a whole new light,” he said, pressing on. “That guy has eyes for you, Riley. The way I saw him looking at you . . .and you looking at him . . . could have fooled me,” he shrugged, patting her on the back.

Riley bit her lip, even more confused than before. She trudged toward the plank shaking her head at him. “I’ll see you around, Matt. I better get this guy back to his friends.”

She walked off the plank toward Liam who was gazing at the New York skyline deep in thought. The worry lines on his forehead were prominent, and his eyes looked deep with sadness.

“Hey . . . we were having a pretty deep conversation on that boat . . . then Matt interrupted and you seemed to close yourself off again. I don’t want to forget it, Liam. We were friends once. More than friends,” she sighed, closing her eyes at the memory. “I don’t want to spend another eight years wondering about you . . . wanting closure . . .” she trailed off.

“Why do you care so much?” He asked.

“Huh?” She questioned.

“Several hours ago you were dumping a pitcher of water over my head. After that, I assumed you never wanted to see me again . . . then I saw you at the club . . . and then you took us to the cove,” he trailed off. “You went through all this trouble to make this happen for me tonight . . . then you tell me you’re worried about me . . . about my happiness,” he shakes his head as if in disbelief. “What changed?”

“I – I don’t know,” she shrugged. “I can say the same about you,” she turned it back on him. “Eight years, Liam. Eight years without a single word. I sent to hell and back after you left, then you waltz back into my life and I’m finally ready to tell you off for leaving me back in Germany,” she sighed. “So yeah, at first . . . well I guess my anger got the best of me. Then,” she trailed off. “I guess I wanted closure,” she said softly. “I mean, back at the cove, you talked about your family obligation, but then something changed. You seemed sad and lost and I don’t know . . . I just wanted to do something for you to make you feel better,” she shrugged. “I suppose talking to Drake may have triggered me being a bit more open-minded about things . . . and well, how you saved me back at the club certainly opened my eyes about a few things,” she reasoned. “I guess I built up this terrible image of you in my head, and you’re just . . . you’re not. You’re not terrible, Liam. You weren’t a terrible guy, then either. There was a reason why I cared about you so deeply . . a reason why you leaving without saying goodbye hurt me so terribly . . . I cared for you,”

She loved him then, but she certainly wasn’t going to admit that to him. Not when he had warned her that they could never be together. It was her own fault. He had told her that they could only have the summer together, that realistically anything beyond that summer would lead to something that could never continue. At the time, she was okay with that, but then, he left before the summer had even ended, then her world turned upside down and she just crumbled.

“We should talk,” Liam said lowly, his gaze turning steely. “You deserve to know the truth . . . about everything. Why I left, why I couldn’t stay in touch . . .” he trailed off, his hand suddenly reached for hers, and she felt a tingle as their skin touched. Her body hummed in anticipation and longing.

Riley looked up at him, tears beginning to form in her eyes. The emotional whirlwind of the night was finally catching up with her. There were so many emotions that she had pushed away for far too long. Now, they were all bubbling back to the surface, and she didn’t know how to feel? What was she doing? He was engaged. He was going to leave her again. This little reunion was exactly as she had told Matt – a pure coincidence. There would be nothing beyond tonight. She wasn’t the type of girl to cheat and she certainly didn’t want to cause any turmoil between Liam and his fiancé. It didn’t matter if she loved him first. It didn’t matter what happened between them. She just wanted to make him happy, and mission accomplished. He saw the Statue of Liberty. Now it was time to part ways and go back to their lives . . . separately. She pulled her hand out of his grasp, shaking her head.

“I can’t do this. I should go home,” she said hesitantly. Here he was offering her everything she had wanted – an explanation. Not some bullshit about some sort of family obligation, but a genuine, honest to God explanation about why he left her shattered in Germany all those years ago. She finally had her opportunity to confront him about everything that had happened, and here she was chickening out. Perhaps not knowing was better? She’d wanted an explanation for so many years, she was suddenly afraid to have it. Or more appropriately, she was afraid of what was now happening between them. Talking to Liam had always been so easy . . . too easy. She remembered being able to tell him anything. She remembered feeling so comfortable around him. She was feeling it again. This thing between them was dangerous. It would hurt too much to fall for him again. That would be the worst thing to happen . . . considering he was emotionally and physically unavailable to her. He was about to be married for God’s sake. It was time for her leave.

She shook her head quickly. “I have to go,” she murmured, taking a few steps back. “I take it you can find your way back to your friends?” She asked, without really waiting for him to answer.

“Riley,” he said softly.

“I’m glad that we saw each other again . . . but maybe it’s better if we just leave things as they were.” She started to wobble down the path, overwhelmed by the surge of feelings that flooded over her. “I am going to call myself an Uber, go home, sleep this night off, and start fresh in the morning,” she rambled on to herself as she walked away.

“Riley James Lawson,” he called after her, she paused, too afraid to turn back.

“Riley James Lawson,” he called out after her again. “I owe you an explanation . . . I owe you a whole lot more, too . . . It might be eight years too late, but I’d still like you to hear it. If you’d like,” he added.

#almostseries #theroyalromance #trr #choices trr #trr fanfic #trr fic #Royal Romance #choices the royal romance #choices fanfiction #liam x riley #trr au fanfic #trr au #choices: stories you play #playchoices #liam x mc #second chances

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fallinfor-youreyes · 4 years

Text

Catch Me Off My Guard

Dani forgets her lipstick, and ends up learning something new about Malcolm. Post 1x05. Ao3

She forgets her lipstick at his house.

Dani’s not sure how she does it, but she assumes it something to do with sleeping on the counter and dealing with a highly drugged Malcom Bright.

And honestly, if it were any other lipstick, she would have already forgotten about it. But it’s not any other lipstick. It’s her favorite lipstick. Her favorite lipstick that is no longer sold anywhere, that she had bought as many as she could when she heard it was being retired. It was the last tube of her favorite lipstick, and she had been an idiot and decided to wear it out that night because she hadn’t been out in ages. Even if it was for work, and a very stupid idea in the first place.

She had looked literally everywhere else for it, but she remembered seeing it in her bag on the subway to Bright’s, which meant she probably lost it as his place.

Which is why she was here, standing outside his building on a freezing Saturday morning, because she couldn’t bring herself to text him about it, and apparently just showing up at his apartment made more sense in her mind.

If she hadn’t already rang his doorbell, she would already be walking back home. But she had, so she was here, hands stuffed in her pockets, hoping he was actually home so he could let her inside before she got frostbite.

“Hello?” His voice crackles out of the speaker just as she’s about to turn around, and her stomach plummets to the floor. She should have never left her apartment today.

“Bright, it’s Dani.”

“Oh! Hey, come on up!”

The door buzzes, and then she’s inside the blissfully warm hallway, and Malcolm’s head pops out from the top of the stairs, and this is a bad idea, she thinks. They are work friends, people who see each other in the office and sometimes at home when he needs someone to take him there, but it’s a Saturday, and this has nothing to do with work.

She should have just texted him.

“Hi!” His hair flops into his eyes, but he’s smiling at her like nobody’s business, and a weird feeling settles in her chest.

“Hey,” She says, making her way up the steps, taking in how the hall looks different in the early morning sunlight. The colors are different, and she can see the pictures on the wall, and then way too soon she’s turning the corner and almost running straight into him where he’s waiting for her at the door.

Saturday morning Malcolm is different from any other Malcolm she’s met before. His hair is soft and falling in his face, not arranged in the way she’s used to it.

He’s also wearing sweatpants. And a faded Harvard sweatshirt, and it's almost too much for her to handle.

She shrugs off her jacket and he takes it from her before she can hang it up herself, so she busies herself with unzipping her boots so she can leave them at the door, not wanting to track the gross half-snow-half-mud slush through his apartment.

“I don’t mean to barge in, but I think I forgot something here the time I was over.”

“What did you forget?”

She pauses to say hi to Sunshine before making her way inside. “My lipsti-“

Dani freezes, her eyes falling onto Malcolm standing in the middle of the room. His entire kitchen is covered in pastries. Desserts of all sorts sprinkle every available counter, and the oven timer is slowly counting down to whatever is next.

“Lipstick?” He asks, casually as he’s pulling on a pair of oven mitts, like the scene in front of her in completely normal.

“Yeah.” Dani stops at the edge of the counter and tries to count the amount of different food in front of her but she can’t. She’s pretty sure there’s more dessert than weapons on his weapons wall, and it’s making her question everything she’s ever know about Malcom Bright. “Wait, sorry, I didn’t know you baked.”

“Oh,” his cheeks flush pink, and Dani likes the sight of that way too much. “Yeah, I’m what some people might call a stress baker.” He offers her a plate of cookies, and she’s so confused that she takes one.

“I thought you couldn’t eat most foods.”

“Can’t.”

“Then what-“

“Edrissa like brownies,” he says, pointing to the corner full of brownies and cookies. “Ains likes fruit pies and tarts, Gil loves breads, J.T. like donuts, my mom likes cupcakes, and I occasionally can get through a whole slice of crumble.” He opens the oven and glances inside, frowning at whatever is still baking. “Everything else ends up in the break room at work.”

“So you’re the reason the break room has been incredibly popular the last few weeks?”

He shrugs as he closes the over door, pulling out one of the fanciest toothpick holders she’s ever seen.“What about you? I haven’t figured out your favorite dessert yet.”

Dani settles herself into the chair she unfortunately slept in a few weeks ago, right in front of an apple crumble. “I’m known to like a bunch of different things.”

“Good to know.” He flashes her a smile and then moves to wrapping up one of the pies with tin foil. “So, you were saying you lost your lipstick?”

“Yes!” She pushes herself off the chair, because she is not supposed to be getting comfortable here. “I have looked everywhere else for it, and this is the only place I can think I left it.”

“It might be in the bathroom cabin-“ the timer goes off and he glances between her and the oven and his ridiculous fancy tooth picks, and she can tell he’s going to choose the currently unknown pastry, so she nods, and starts making her to the bathroom.

“I’m not sure though. My mother sends her cleaner over here because she doesn’t think I can take care of myself and most of the time, I end up not knowing where anything is.”

Dani opens the cabinet, and it’s surprisingly bare, considering the rest of his bathroom is a full of things. Surprisingly bare, except for a perfectly sized tube of lipstick. Her lipstick. A sigh of relief falls from her mouth, and its a little ridiculous how happy she is have found it, but she has her lipstick and now she can stop feeling weird about coming over to Malcolm’s apartment on a random Saturday morning.

“Found it!” she says, when she comes back into the kitchen, and she’s about to go and get her boots and be out of his hair when she sees he’s placed a cup of tea in on the counter for her. He’s resting on the other side, his own cup of tea and plate of still steaming lemon bars cooling in the space between them.

And she knows she should leave. She got what she came for, and staying would that turn this trip into something else. But she’s curious. She has questions. She puts the lipstick in her pocket and drops herself into the world’s most uncomfortable sleeping chair, and grabs a lemon bar.

“So, where did you learn how to bake?”

“Technically, my mother.”

Dani can’t stop her face being surprised, and he laughs at that, and it makes that stupid dumb feeling in her chest grow a bit more.

“See, you’ve met my mother.” He takes a sip of his tea and plates her a bar. “She would never cook or do anything when we kids. Or now, for that matter. We always had staff for that. But on Christmas, she would always make this apple crumble, and Ainsley and I would sit in the kitchen with her. It was the only time she would ever talk about her family.” Malcolm shrugs and cuts piece of his bar. “And then when everything happened with my dad, she would start making them all the time. It became the only time I didn’t feel like the world was falling apart around us.”

He pauses for a moment, the weight of his words just hanging between them, and Dani doesn’t know what to do say. “Bright I-“

“But mother only cooked crumble, and only for a few months, so then I started sitting in with our cook when she would bake. And then whenever I was over at Gil’s house, I would ask Jackie to teach me everything. So I have a rather rounded baking education.”

“Crumble’s your comfort food?”

Malcolm blinks. “Hmm?”

“You’re comfort food. When you were high you wanted to make crumble. And I made you grilled cheese, because that’s my comfort food.” Dani tucks her hair behind her ears and grabs a bit of the lemon bar. “My mom would make us grilled cheese whenever we had a bad day, and it’s like the only meal I can make without fucking up.”

“From what I remember, it was a pretty fantastic grilled cheese.”

She stuffs the lemon bar in her mouth to shut herself up, but it’s a mistake. She wasn’t really expected anything much, but she can’t help the moan that escapes from mouth.

Malcolm laughs into his tea, and Dani can only nod and try to not stuff the rest of the dessert in her mouth.

“That’s not fair. How can you be so good at this?”

Malcolm’s smile grows. “I’ve been stressed since I was 8 years old. Lot’s of practice.”

Dani grabs another bite so she doesn’t have to say anything right away. There’s a lot about Malcolm Bright that she doesn’t know yet. And there’s a lot about her that he doesn’t know. But she does know that this conversation could be about a lot more than baking, but she needs to know if she’s prepared for that.

They are sort of friends. She remembers his face when he asked her if they were really friends, and how it fell when she said no, because she’s not good at friends. She’s not good at the trusting people and letting people in, and she has zero filter which gets on people’s nerves, and she’s been through a lot. A lot that can scare people away and a lot that has, so she guards herself.

But he looked so crushed when she said they weren’t friends. And against all odds, she likes him. He’s one of the few people she’s met who has been through even more than her, who knows what it’s like to scare people away. They haven’t know each other for long, but for some reason, she knows she trusts him. Which is pretty big for her.

“You know, if you ever need someone to talk to about whatever’s stressing you out, I’m always down for a lemon bar. Or a blueberry muffin,” she grabs her cup of tea, the scent of earl grey greeting her as she pulls it closer. “Or just a cup of tea, with a friend.”

Malcolm ducks his head and tries to hide his smile, but he’s not very good at hiding his emotions. His face is an open book of possibilities. That’s something she knows about him. She wouldn’t mind getting to know more.

“Thanks, Dani. And speaking of thanks, I want to take you out to dinner, to properly say thank you for taken care of me. Twice now,” he says.

She stuffs another piece of lemon bar in her mouth instead of answering.

Dinner outside of sharing a hotdog on stake out is more than just coworker things. Dinner on a Saturday is so much more than just coworker things.

A part of her feels like it could even be a more than friends thing. That part of her also kind of likes the idea of it being a more than friends thing.

“It’s not even 11:30 yet,” she says, because it’s the first rational thing that comes to her mind. She should have waiting for the first smart thing to come to her mind.

Malcolm nods, like what she said was an actual response, folding his hands together so he can place his head on them.

“What about brunch then? I know a great coffee place that has one of the most impressive tea walls I have ever seen.”

She should say no. She should have left as soon as she had her lipstick, but she’s still here, sitting at his counter on a freezing cold Saturday morning.

“You don’t have to take me out to thank me,” she says, trying one last time.

Malcolm’s face brightens. “But I want too.”

And it shouldn’t, it really shouldn’t, but it makes her heart jump in her chest. It make her cheeks heat up, and she tries to squash the smile from erupting on her face, but all it does it make her entire face scrunch up like she’s some 16 year old with a crush on a boy who just told he he thought she was pretty.

But maybe that’s what she is. A 25 year old with a crush on a boy who she trusts more than she should. A boy that smiles at her and has even less of a filter than she does, a boy who is currently watching her like whatever she says next going to determine the fate of the universe.

“Okay, I could be down for some more tea.”

“Great!” Malcolm’s up in the next instant, and then he’s holding out her jacket for her once she’s finished zipping up her boots, and when she turns, he’s close to her. As close as they where when he was high and wanted to dance with her.

Close enough that she can feel his breath wash over her skin he breathes out.

Close enough, that the part of her brain that she’s allowing to have a crush on him is now thinking about kissing him.

But she doesn’t. She’s not good at friends, and she’s definitely not very good at relationships, and the last thing she wants to do is mess up whatever fragile thing they have between them right now.

She she takes a step back. Tucks a piece of hair behind her ear. Turns to the mirror in the hall while Malcom pulls on his jacket, and grabs her lipstick from her pocket before smoothing it over her lips.

“It’s a good lipstick,” Malcolm says, as he finishes zippering his coat. Dani raises an eyebrow at him as he pulls on his gloves. “I understand why you came back for it.” He offers her his elbow, and it’s so very upper class New York of him that the only she can do is roll her eyes and take his arm.

When she gets into work on Monday, there’s a blueberry muffin sitting on her desk.

And if a warm feeling settles in her chest at the sight of it, then that’s her problem to worry about later.

Right now, she has a muffin to eat.

#prodigal son #prodigal son fic #malcolm bright #dani powell #brightwell #post 1x05 #look baker!malcolm got stuck in my head #and then this disaster happened #i miss them already

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darylandbethfanforever9 · 4 years

Text

Downfall Of Us All: Chapter 8

Downfall Of Us All

Chapter 8

AN: Thank you, to everyone who is enjoying the story and thank you to @jtargaryen18 for sending me positive thoughts.

Link to master list:

Warnings: Character death, mention of past sexual assault and PTSD.

They reached the kitchen without anyone catching them, but Grace swore she could hear the soundtrack for Swan Lake playing in the distance. Maybe it was just her imagination. Clint grabbed a pack of chocolate cookies, while Grace made the popcorn, and some salted caramel brownies. There was plenty of stuff left over, as they sneakily went to Clint's bedroom. Clint was amused to see Grace's cats were asleep on the lounge near his bed, with Lucky settled peacefully on the large dog bed. He turned on Netflix, and found a film called Mission Impossible: Ghost Protocol. He waited until Grace was comfortable and played the film, as they sat together in a comfortable silence while watching the film. Grace felt safe around Clint, he reminded her of a fierce hawk. She smiled, and offered him the plate of brownies, he took one and bit into it with a smile of thanks. They both watched the film, and were impressed so far.

Bucky found himself unable to sleep again, his nightmares were constantly waking him, and it made him hate what he was even more. He hated HYDRA, and he hated the KGB for turning him into the Winter Soldier. At least he wasn't that anymore, he preferred the name White Wolf that the Wakandan children had given him during his stay with the kind, gentle villagers. He heard music playing from the ballet studio, and curiously went to see what was going on. He was surprised to see it was Sophie, and she was dancing to Swan Lake, her movements graceful. It was reminding Bucky of Natasha, if he thought about it. "You're up late, doll." Bucky said quietly, Sophie jumped at hearing his voice, and turned around to face him. "Sorry, I didn't mean to wake up anyone. I just couldn't sleep, my mind's just a jumbled mess," Sophie explained shyly, she was wearing a grey tank top with a pair of black sweatpants. Her eyes strayed to Bucky, he was in a pair of black sweatpants and shirtless, his left metal arm glowing in the dim lighting. She could see the gold outlines on his left metal arm. He looked intimidating but at the same time gentle, she cautiously put a hand on his left arm feeling him shiver against her touch. He swallowed roughly, and turned his face away. "Monster," he said bitterly, Sophie shook her head and squeezed his metal hand gently. She didn't think he was a monster, he'd been used as a weapon by HYDRA and the Soviet Union. "I think you should be calling me that, James. I was born out of rape, a lot of people would think I'm a monster." Sophie said quietly, feeling heartbroken at how terrified her mother must have been as had their father had been. "You weren't given a choice Sophie, your father...I remember him vaguely. My memories are slowly coming back, I write them in my journals," Bucky explained quietly, and Sophie looked at him quietly. "So, they're memory books?" She asked stunned, a part of her felt terrible for how Bucky must feel having to have these horrific memories of his crimes. He was a victim, just like her parents and Grace had been. The thought of what Grace had been put through, horrified her when they heard Jarvis speak. "Shall, I turn off the music Miss Sophie?" The AI asked politely, Sophie nodded in agreement at his suggestion. "Yes please, Jarvis." She said softly and looked at Bucky who was fussing over Raymond who'd come to visit. The Bengal rescue cat purred loudly and allowed him to stroke his chin.

Bucky nodded. "Yeah, I started journaling not long after S.H.I.E.L.D. fell and I was a fugitive for a couple of years." Sophie stopped to consider that. "You must have been… I can't imagine what that was like for you. All of a sudden you were free in a world that was so different from the one you came from. Was there no one to help you? Anyone?" Bucky shrugged, continuing to pet Raymond. "I could have gone to Steve. I should have gone to Steve. I spent most of that time avoiding him and he was just trying to help me." "Did you remember him at all?" Sophie wondered. "I know you were close before all of that happened to you." "In bits and pieces, Sophie," he admitted. "What I read about him in the Smithsonian seemed like an encyclopaedia next to what I remembered about him then. He said he was my friend but… I didn't know who to trust." His gaze met hers, the sympathy in her expression made him pause. "That's why I want to help you and your sister, I guess. I have an idea of what it's like to be tossed away when you're no longer useful and have to try and survive in a place you're completely unprepared for." He handed her Raymond, glancing around the ballet studio. "I'm grateful that you and Grace are here. This might not be what you wanted but it's better than falling into HYDRA's hands." Wrapping her arms carefully around her cat, she nodded. "I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous about all of this, Bucky. I'm used to making cakes, not kicking ass." He laughed at that. "You'll do better than you think," he told her. "You showed a lot of promise today." "Yeah." Rolling her eyes, she put Raymond down at her feet. "I appreciate you trying to make me feel like I was… getting somewhere with that." "You did great," he told her. "And you weren't acting at all?" she said with a challenge. He'd kind of guessed that she was proud. He was starting to realize that he'd only just scratched that surface. "I wasn't acting at all," he said seriously. Sophie seemed to consider that. "I guess it wasn't terrible then. Grace showed me up." "She took down Peter." He snorted. "He wouldn't have gotten up off that mat so fast if you'd been the one who nailed him." She nodded, seeming embarrassed by the praise. "We could match you up with someone else to spar if that would help," he offered. "If that would make you feel better." "No," she said quickly, her face darkening. "No, I'd rather work with you. I don't want easier to feed my ego. You give me something to work towards. If I ever get to a point where I can take you down, well, I'll have some sense of accomplishment." "You will, huh?" Sophie was flustered, and it was adorable. "Don't make fun of me," she said with a nervous laugh. "Wouldn't dare, doll," he said with all honesty. "There's a lot of things I can't do. I couldn't make a cake to save my life. Hell, I can barely heat canned and frozen stuff when I have to." Her laugh was a warm, beautiful sound. "I sure couldn't dance like that," he admitted. "You can't dance at all?" She quirked a brow at him. "I didn't say that," he explained. "Used to love going dancing before I went into the army. I'd stay out on the floor with the dames—ladies for hours. Used to drive Steve nuts when I'd set him up on a blind date and drag him along." "Show me," Sophie challenged him. "We're up anyway. Dance with me."

"You're on doll," Bucky said intrigued, and he gently held her by the waist as Jarvis began playing slow jazz music on the speakers. He effortlessly spun her around, and pulled her into his arms, as they began doing a very intimate dance. He distantly recalled dancing before the war, and Sophie smiled at him as he threw her over his shoulder in an effortless move. She laughed, and they continued to dance. He didn't feel like a monster and smiled as the music changed to swan lake. He watched impressed as Sophie pointed her toes and leaned against the bar up against the mirror. She smiled at him, and he pulled her into him as they did pas de deux, and he smiled when she did the spin with attitude. She was like one of those miniature ballet dancers in a music box, spinning around delicately. "I'll catch you, trust me," he said quietly, she nodded at him and did the split leap, landing gracefully in his arms as the soundtrack finished dramatically. Neither of them had noticed Steve, and Natasha watching them.

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"It's like watching a Soviet Union version of Swan Lake, you know?" Natasha said softly, as they both watched Bucky and Sophie perform ballet. Steve nodded in agreement, he couldn't help but admire Bucky's dance moves, which clearly had ballet incorporated into the choreography.

Sophie performed a split leap, which would make any gymnast jealous as the music began ending dramatically. She landed gracefully in Bucky's arms, and Steve smiled.

Bucky looked relaxed, and happy. He was happy that Sophie had been able to make him, smile.

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Clint woke up to see that Grace was fast asleep, and it was three AM in the morning. He vaguely remembered that after watching Mission Impossible, they'd brushed their teeth and put the food away. He quietly put the quilt around her, and she curled up into him even more, seeking his warmth. He stilled, but relaxed and laid down beside her. Laura hadn't liked him holding her too much, that should have signalled warning bells, but he'd been in love with her. He had genuinely thought she had loved him and look how that turned out. Last night, Grace had comforted him and confessed that she felt the exact same way as he did about her son. She knew his pain, and the terrible heartache it left. Unlike Grace, he had closure, but she didn't have that small comfort. She'd been left in an agonising limbo with her sister, ever since S.H.I.E.L.D had taken Zach away. Hopefully they would find him, he felt Grace trembling in the bedsheets and saw she was crying fearfully. "Please don't do this, just let me go home. I swear I won't tell anyone," she sobbed frightened.

"Grace?" He muttered, his voice rough from sleep. "Please don't," she began to cry in her sleep. "Don't touch me. Please. I just want to go home—" "Grace!" Clint had firmly grasped her upper arms and shook her enough to awaken her but not enough to make her terror worse. "Gracie, wake up." Her eyes flew open, rolling around wildly until she began to focus on him. Her palm smoothed up to his face, staring hard at him for a moment as if she didn't know him. "Grace, it's Clint. It's me. Breathe," he whispered. Tears ran over her cheeks. Christ, she looked so scared. "Clint?" She asked, sounding so small. "Yeah, it's me," he told her, keeping his voice calm. "You're safe. I've got you." Her eyes scanned the room frantically, she seemed to be remembering how she'd got there and why. "He's not here?" "No, honey, he's not. Just me. You're safe with me," he whispered. "Please breathe. You're scaring me." It reminded him of the nightmares Cooper used to have when he was small, worried about monsters killing his daddy. She sucked in air before a sob ripped from her chest, a low painful sound that broke his heart as he watched her crumble. "Come here," he whispered, pulling her to his chest and holding her close. "It's okay. I've got you. You're safe with me." "Oh my God, Clint," she managed between sobs and breaths. "He's… he's still out there." "Not for long," he swore. Brock Rumlow's days were numbered. Clint would personally guarantee that. "What if he… f-finds me?" Her voice sounded so broken. "One day," Clint told her, rubbing small circles on her back, "he will find us. You and me. And we'll finish him, Grace. We'll keep him from ever hurting anyone else. I promise." Her arms wrapped around him, held him tight. He felt her nod against his chest. "Yes… yes, we will. I want to be there, Clint," she said, sounding stronger. Pulling back, she stared up into his face, her eyes filled with shadows of the pain he felt. "I want to be there to see it." Pressing a kiss to her forehead, he pulled her into his chest and stretched out on his back. "You'll be there, Grace. You'll see it." Nodding, she rested her head on his chest, throwing one slim leg across his own as she sought comfort. Trusting him as her sobs faded and her breaths slowed down into the cadence of sleep. Clint, who had a hard time sleeping himself, just enjoyed holding her. Her sleep seemed peaceful now and he'd take that. She'd need her sleep for the days ahead. He wasn't just telling her nonsense to get her to go back to sleep. He'd meant every word he'd said. He didn't care if Rumlow found him or it was the other way around. The outcome would be the same. Rumlow was already dead.

Clint had never hated someone as much as he did about Rumlow, and Laura but he did hate them. He'd make Rumlow suffer for what he'd done to Grace, and all of his other victims. He held Grace close and leaned back against the pillows as Starling came over and sat by his feet. The black cat purring lightly, as he lulled Clint into a restful sleep.

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Jarvis woke up the team for their morning training session, causing a bleary-eyed Tony to stumble out of his bedroom. His dark brown hair was tousled, and his Metallica t-shirt looked like it was covered in motor oil. "Eat breakfast, then we'll be doing team training," Steve said amused, when he saw Bucky and Sophie coming together, Bucky had a peaceful expression on his face while Sophie looked more at ease than she had yesterday. "Who's turn is it to cook?" Natasha asked curiously, the team had come up with a weekly rota, so each team member could cook breakfast, lunch and dinner. "Mine, Sam cooked yesterday." Bucky answered, as he began getting the ingredients out for Belgian waffles, pancakes and beef sausages. "Are we doing the training, and then eating?" Sophie asked tentatively, she didn't know how this worked out but was curious about how the team did it. "We'll be eating breakfast, and then doing training, shortly. We want you to build muscle, not waste away." Natasha explained patiently, and Sophie smiled in understanding. "Mr Stark, there are two police officers wishing to speak with you," Jarvis announced, Tony frowned but nodded at the AI. "Let them in, Jarvis." He said wearily, and they heard a car driving into the car park before seeing on the security camera two non-uniformed police officers entering. "Mr Stark, I'm Lieutenant Olivia Benson and this is my partner, Detective Amanda Rollins. I'm afraid, something has happened to Happy Hogan." The woman said gently. The room became quiet, everyone looked worried and Tony had paled considerably. "Is Happy alright? Where is he?" Tony asked worriedly, he cared a lot about Happy and the man had always supported him. "I'm so sorry Mr Stark, but Happy Hogan was found murdered this morning outside Stark Industries. Do you know where we can find Virginia Potts? She was the last person who Happy spoke to." Olivia explained sympathetically, her hazel eyes meeting his. Tony opened his mouth to speak, but no sound came out. Happy was dead......someone had murdered his close friend, and he felt sick to his stomach. The others looked at him worriedly, wanting to say something to try and console him. "I haven't spoken to Pepper since yesterday morning, she wants a divorce and I'm signing the papers today," Tony said quietly, feeling distraught. Who would want to kill Happy?

"Are you… are you sure it's him? Has the body been identified?" Tony tried, praying with everything he had that this was a mistake, that he and Happy could laugh it off later.

"You can help us with that, positive identification," Detective Rollins told him. "If you'd come with us."

Natasha gently embraced Tony from behind. "Maybe this is a mistake," she whispered.

Tony felt fragile at the moment like Nat was holding him up.

"Stay here and manage things," Tony told her. "I won't be long."

To Steve he nodded. "Take care of things, Cap."

Steve's face mirrored the sadness that was crushing him from the inside. Steve clamped a hand on his shoulder.

"Whatever you need," Steve told him.

Tony saw Bucky and the one spider girl, read their concern. Since when did people feel sorry for him? Pity him?

At least he had his shoes on as he trudged after the two policewomen and headed out of the front of the compound. The detective – her name was Amanda, right? – turned back to him as she motioned to their unmarked sedan.

"Would you like to bring someone with you, Mr. Stark?" she offered.

Tony felt lost, realizing everyone was back up in the kitchen. Glancing up and down the sidewalk, he saw one small woman coming up the walk, lugging a bag as big as she was. Her dark brown hair had gold highlights in the sun and it looked like she'd spent some time styling it. Her blouse and skirt looked professional, the heels he could tell she wasn't used to walking in were scuffed already and there was a huge runner in her stockings as she carried the bag up to the sidewalk.

Deliberately he came to a stop in front of her. "Who are you?"

Her mouth dropped open when she glanced up at him, her grey eyes wide. "Lillia Dumitrescu."

"Do you work here?"

The young woman nodded. "It's my first day."

She was adorable, and she would do.

"You work for me?"

"Yes, Mr. Stark."

"Okay, we're going to the police station," he told her before opening the back door and ushering her in the back of the car, huge bag and all. "Get in."

Once they were settled, she sat demurely in the back with her hands folded in her lap. "Am I in trouble, Mr. Stark?"

Tony shook his head. "I just need someone to come with me to the police station."

"Okay."

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Tagging list: @jtargaryen18, @marvelfansworld, @sapphirescrolls, @kitkatd7, @sweater-daddiesdumbdork, @nomadicpixel and @queenoftheunderdark, and @my-favourite-fics

#Hawkeye Fanfiction #Ronin Fanfiction #Clint Barton Fanfiction #Clint Barton x OC #Winter Soldier Fanfiction #Bucky Barnes x OC

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pinkykitten · 6 years

Text

Madly, deeply, truly, passionately in love

Bright

Kandomere x half elf/half human! female reader

Warning: A little bit of angst, insecure reader, some bullying.

Specifics: Angst, fluff, romance

People: Kandomere, you, Montehugh, and three elf women.

Words: 2,580

Requested by: @jinx-is-fire Okay so a really fluffy Kandomere x reader where reader is a half elf/human. Reader gets harassed by some coworkers at the MTF and when they both get home reader thinks he should leave her because she isnt good enough for him. Kandomere doesn't stand for this and decides to show reader how much she means to him. 😍

“Honey look over here at mommy.” Seeing the year on the right corner of the screen from when your parents recorded you throughout your life. You smiled at seeing yourself as a baby. You liked doing this. Just sitting in your room watching clips of your childhood. See that time you didn’t know about the hard aches of life. You didn’t know that everyday people were segregated from others. Your life was easy, its was fun, but that was all in the past.

Your father was a human and your mother was an elf. As a little girl you would stare in amazement at your parents when they told the story of how they fell in love. You remember your father telling you, “your mother was the most beautiful woman and still is. My heart fell in love the first minute I saw her.” Your parents would tell you how difficult it was for them to meet. Back then and now you should associate with your kind. Even in the womb your parents always taught you to never treat anyone with disrespect, don't judge a book by its cover. Now that took tremendous amount of work. In school you weren't sure where to fit in, and you really didn’t. You didn’t fit in with the elves or humans. You felt alone since there were no elf half human there. But still you respected everyone around you, even if they didn’t deserve it.

Here you were now, a grown woman. You got your own place and got a job at the Magic Task Force. You worked till you had bags under your eyes. See your parents always told you to slow it down a bit, take a break, but you couldn’t. You felt in your heart that maybe one day, just one day if you worked hard enough people would actually like you or at least stand you. You also worked more hours for your parents sake. Already they were older folks and they could not work. Your mother suffered from back pains and your dad messed up his knee pretty badly. They always tell you to use your money on something important but you always respond with, “you guys are important.”

Beep, beep.

“Ugh,” you groaned. You tried to turn that dang clock off but instead you hit the invisible table and fell off your bed. Your face on the ground you moaned again. You got up with your cupcake slippers on, your comfy womfy pj pants, and a t-shirt that says “life behind bars” and it has a bicycle bar handle as the picture. You stretched and yawned saying hi to your pug Édgar (yes because Édgar Ramírez plays Kandomere and a pug cause Pewdiepie has a pug named Edgar) and giving Édgar a kiss. He glances at you with his cute eyes looking very lazy. “That's why you’re my dog,” whisper while heading to the bathroom. You give yourself a look before you start the day and if you didn’t scare the mirror then you surely scared yourself. You can tell you just had awoken from a deep sleep.

“I LOOK TERRIBLE,” you half yell half whisper to your reflection. You had to look nice today. Tomorrow was a special occasion, it was your 2 year anniversary with Kandomere. “Man, we’ve been boyfriend and girlfriend for 2 years. I thought he would of left me by now.” You cleaned your house and when you mean clean you mean clean. You scrubbed till you had sweat on your brow. See, Kandomere was going to be sleeping over tonight and spending the whole day with you the next day, the actual date of your anniversary. You peer at the list that is on your phone while your getting ready. You have so much planned for tomorrow. The whole shebang. Your heart sped fast at just the thought of spending all night with him and all next day. You squealed aloud making Édgar jump. You made a delicious breakfast for yourself and gave food to your chubby pug, got dressed and ready putting your makeup on feeling super confident, then you sat down while putting your shoes on to see the news. “Great,” you spoke. “More orcs fighting and being blamed for everything possible. I tell you this world is going nuts.” You were actually talking to Édgar, since he was sitting next to you on the couch. You put your face close to his and pat him vigorously at the back of his ears. “You excited to see Papi?” Édgar opened his mouth a little and barked the lowest bark ever…”Me too,” you cheered.

You left in your car to go to the building of the MTF. To be honest you sometimes didn’t want to go to work. You knew your co-workers made fun of you. You were different and that was something that some folks didn’t like. You walk in the facility trying to make people believe you are so confident when in reality you’re not. But everything in your life turns so much better when you see that handsome face from across the room. You sprint over to Kandomeres office, greeting Montehugh on your way.

“Hi baby,” you beamed crouching down a little to give your elf a kiss on the lips. Ugh those lips, you couldn't get enough of them. You turned around to shut the door, and walked to one of his seats on the other side of his desk.

“Hola sweetheart,” Kandomere smiled.

“So, guess what? I have everything planned out, we’re gonna go to the fair, the nice one of course. Then we’re gonna eat at many restaurants and go in the pool maybe after and IT’S GONNA BE SO MUCH FUN!”

Kandomere giggled at your cuteness. He brought his hands forward to grasp yours and kissed them.

“I can’t wait to spend all those hours with you, mi amor.”

“Awww thanks babe,” you say as you stand up, then to sit on his lap. “I love you.”

“Love you too.” You give tiny kisses all over his face. “See you later,” you wave to Kandomere.

“Bye honey.”

You loved it when he called you all those names, especially his Spanish. When he speaks Spanish that's like your drug right there.

That whole time at work you examine cases that have come around. Sometimes those cases can be such a headache to you. But today was different, you were going to have a blast. That is all you cared about. You looked at your electric clock on your desk and it read 4:00 PM. “Whelp time to go home. Gonna make some brownies and cookies.” You dance a little as you hum in excitement. You grab your purse and make you way to the elevator. You were going to meet Kandomere in the parking lot. As you walked out your door to your office these female elves came up to you with a sour look. “Where do you think you’re going...freak,” one girl said. She was super lean and tall. She had black hair ice blue eyes and big, pink lips. You had to admit she looked like she could work as a model for victoria's secret. “Oh I’m just going to the elevator, excuse me,” you replied.

“Really? Well if you’re going with our Kandomere, you got another thing coming.” The second one said. She had red hair, was shorter, and had nice curves. Her eyes were white, with angled eyebrows.

“Yours,” you began. “He belongs to no one, not even me.”

“Look at you, you know what I hate the most? I hate when I see people like you that try to fit in or that want to. Just look at yourself sweetheart. You’re ugly, and you’re not even human or elf. You will never fit in with society,” the third elf spoke up. She had blonde hair in a bun, her eyes were a light pastel pink, and her jaw was very pointy.

Her comment hurt you a lot. You were doing all these things to try to fit in society, to try to be normal. You tried to speed walk past them, making it seem like the words they said didn’t hurt.

The elf one with black hair spoke up again, “why would Kandomere want someone like you. You know what I think? I think she has some orc in her girls don’t you think. She looks very much like a pig. Hahaha.”

You closed your eyes to fight your tears. Why did people treat you like this? All the other elves nodded their heads, cackling away at your insecurities.

“Don’t pay attention to them y/n, they are just trying to put your down,” you tried to convince yourself but you knew you believed them.

“You also don’t even know how to work correctly. You look, smell, and do your job like a slob. You should go back to the farm where you were born or maybe the zoo. I heard they were wanting more whales there.” The red head elf laughed and the others joined her. You ran to the elevator and tried to close the door quickly.

“Don’t worry retard, I don’t want to go in an elevator with a person like you. Were your parents drinking when they had you. Seriously, an elf and a human. I guess that's where you get your stupid from.” The blonde hair yelled as the elevator door closed.

You just started sobbing, they were so mean to you and your family. You rubbed the tears away from your eyes and looked at yourself in the reflection of the elevator. You tried to compose yourself to make it look like you weren’t crying. As you looked at your reflection you muttered the words, “disgusting.” The elevator dinged and you made your way out.

Coming into the parking lot you look around to see Kandomere. He had a big smile on his face while talking to the phone. Seeing you walking to him made him happy but then he realized your face. You weren’t beaming like earlier, your eyes were red and you had tear stained cheeks.

“Baby what's wrong,” Kandomere whispered as you came up to him.

“Nothing, can we just go to the house already.”

Kandomere nodded and opened the car door for you. “We can just pick up my car later or whatever,” you mumbled.

“Sure no problem,” Kandomere said to you. The whole car ride was quiet, a little awkward considering you were all jumpy in the beginning.

Once you both made it to your house you honestly didn’t feel like doing anything except lay in bed and cry forever. As you both walked inside you set all your belongs on a nearby table, Kandomere doing the same. Kandomere knew something wasn’t right.

“Well y/n what do you want to do?”

You shrugged while slowly walking to the coach. Plopping yourself on the comfortable cushions, you grabbed the remote turning on the tv. Kandomere shook his head then walked up, got a hold of the remote and turned off the tv.

“Baby talk to me, whats wrong?”

“Nothing Kandomere,” you said harshly. Getting up abruptly. “Nothing's wrong, just can you please leave me alone.”

“Yes there is. This morning you were so happy to be with me, now you’re acting like this!” Kandomere moved his arms out to your actions.

“I don’t want to repeat myself Kandomere, nothing happened just drop it!” Now you were raising your voice. Couldn’t he just see that you didn’t want to talk about it.

“Y/n just tell me what's wrong. I promise I will help you. Just tell me,” Kandomere begged.

“I’m not good enough okay! There I said it, I’m not good enough...I don’t want you to date a failure like me. A disgust like me, an idiot like me. A mistake...like me.”

“Y/n…,” Kandomere whispered stepping closer to you.

“No you can’t be with me. I am not good enough for you. You need someone prettier, better than me. Please Kandomere.”

Kandomere came up to you and hugged you with so much force that you thought he might break your ribs. You sobbed harder now and limped falling in his arms. He bent down now cradling you like a ball. Comforting you.

“Its okay sweetheart let it out,” Kandomere breathed. You felt tears on your face and you opened your eyes to see your sweet elf crying with you.

“Please my love don’t ever think that about yourself. You are so much more than that. You make my life complete, you make me a better person. You mean the world to me and so much more. When I see you I feel safe and loved. I only want to be with you and only you for the rest of my life. Even when I die I want my spirit to be with yours for eternity. My heart belongs to only you and no one else. Everyday I breathe and live is because you exist. You are my wish that came true, you are the angel I think of every night in my dreams. You are the one person I can depend on in life. You are the one that makes me feel it's okay to be myself. You make me feel loved y/n, I don’t think words can describe how perfect you are. You are my everything and I will always love you no matter what you look like. Heck, I wouldn’t care if you were a piece of bread. I love you y/n forever and always.”

You looked up at Kandomere and cried more.

“I’m sorry baby did I say something wrong,” he cringed at his actions thinking he said something wrong to make you cry.

“No sweetie, I love you so much. Thank you for always making me feel like a queen, for making me feel...beautiful. For always making me feel better in these times.” You gave Kandomere a big kiss on his lips, savoring the taste and feel. After you kissed him you gave him small pecks all over his face. Kissing every inch of his face. He and you giggled, placing your forehead on his. Kandomere kissed your nose. “I love you baby,” Kandomere whispered.

“I love you too my love,” you whispered back as if your love, this moment was only for you and him to see.

Later on

While you guys were laying in bed watching Caso Cerrado you explained to Kandomere what all those elf women said.

“Don’t worry I’ll take care of them,” Kandomere hissed. You look at him puzzled, thinking, “what in the world is he going to do?”

So what Kandomere did was not too harsh, no it wasn’t. He fired all those elf women and gave them a discourse of how if they ever disrespected you he would do something that would make them wish they never yelled at you. He also gave them a speech of how they should not judge people. So Kandomere does not mind that you are different. If you think you are ugly and imperfect Kandomere will make sure everyday that he proves to you, that he shows you, that everyday he will make it his mission to make you see how beautiful you truly are. He is madly, deeply, truly, passionately in love with you even with all your imperfections. You are perfectly imperfect to him. And he wouldn't have it any other way.

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squishysvt · 6 years

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Bellaria

Member: Doyoung (NCT) Genre: Fluff Word Count: 2.2k *this is in Doyoung’s POV if anyone is confused* A/N this wasn’t requested but it’s something I had written for Admin Sierra’s birthday :D sorry for being so inactive ;n; please enjoy! -Admin Madi

Doyoung’s friends thought he had some sort of odd infatuation with sweets, but it turns out that the reason he frequented the quaint bakery on the corner wasn’t just for the delicate desserts, but for the girl who made them.

Doyoung would be the first to admit that he wasn’t all that crazy about sweets. They gave him a stomach ache and made his teeth hurt if they were too sugar filled, but he decided that maybe the dainty delicacies weren’t so bad if it meant he got to see her in return.

It started when he was looking for a gift to buy Taeyong for his birthday. He didn’t want to buy him clothes as he knew he had enough, and he didn’t want to just give him money and look lazy, so he found a happy medium that Taeyong would thoroughly enjoy and appreciate; chocolates. He pitched the idea to himself and was hesitant that maybe Taeyong wouldn’t like just plain old bars of chocolate from the store, so Doyoung made it his mission to find the best chocolate he could find in the city.

With his phone in one hand and other stuffed in his coat pocket, Doyoung perused the city streets until his eyes caught a glimpse of a pink awning with pristine golden letters indicating a confectionery shop. It was right on the corner, both hidden and on full display to traffic depending on the time of day. He wondered if he ever noticed the small business before on his way to work, but was grateful nonetheless that it seemed to appear out of nowhere. As he came upon the door, the bright pastel colors of pinks, blues and purples pulled a smile from his face and warmed his insides as the smell of freshly baked goods wafted from the shelves as he stepped inside. There wasn’t anyone in the entirety of the store it seemed as the only sound he could hear was of soft piano music playing from the back kitchen along with the occasional beep of an oven.

Despite not being the biggest fan of sugary goodness, he indulged in looking down each aisle, each shelf and in every nook and cranny that was visible and lined with food. The prettily decorated cakes and ooey gooey cookies fresh from the pan had his stomach rumbling in hunger, and his face was as close to the display case as possible as he took in the sights of the colorful cupcakes that almost looked too good to eat. He wondered if it would be wrong to try and sneak a bite of something since it appeared no one was in sight, but he glanced around before slipping behind the counter and sliding the glass of the display to the side. His fingers danced over each item, hovering over the cupcakes, wiggling above the brownies and eventually finding themselves on the cookies. The chocolate chips melted into his fingertips and the dough threatened to fall apart with how warm it was, so he wasted no time in bringing it to his mouth and taking a particularly huge bite. His mind was filled with immediate happiness as this was not only the best cookie he had ever eaten, but he knew Taeyong would adore anything he were to buy him from here.

The sound of someone clearing their throat pulled him from his sweet induced high, and he turned to find a girl standing in the doorway of the kitchen. Her hair was messy and face a bit covered with flour, but he thought she was cute despite the frown on her face.

“You’re not allowed back here,” Her voice was soft, light and angelic, really, because it turned his flushed, embarrassed cheeks to those of nerves and blush.

Doyoung pulled the cookie from his mouth and immediately apologized, rushing to explain himself and what he was doing behind the counter. “You see, I wasn’t trying to steal or anything, I was going to leave some money by the register...but everything looks so good that I couldn’t resist the temptation.” His hands were moving as he spoke, as animated as the rest of his face, and his expression of worry turned to confusion as the girl began to laugh.

“W-What is it?”

“Your mouth,” She pointed and smiled, covering her mouth and shaking her head, “The corners of your mouth are covered in chocolate.”

“OH, uhhh shit, sorry,” Doyoung looked around for a napkin in a frenzy, but was handed a cloth instead. He hesitated before accepting it, and the girl wondered if he was scared of her or the rag itself.

“It won’t bite.”

“Yeah, I know that. It’s just that it’s so clean and I don’t want to dirty it.” His lips fell into a frown that mimicked her own from earlier, and she shook her head in response.

“That’s sweet of you, but it’s okay, I promise.”

He hesitated again. The light pink color was too intimidating, and the girls stare wasn’t helping the situation. Doyoung wasn’t normally awkward, but he really wanted the floor to open up and envelope him right about then. But he sighed, locked eyes with the pretty girl and cleaned himself up timidly.

“So you work here, I gather?”

“Yep, I own the place actually.”

“No way, you can’t be old enough to run this place by yourself. It’s impossible!”

She shook her head again and Doyoung thought it was funny that her whole body swung with the movement.

“Nothing’s impossible, especially when it comes to me.” She was beginning to turn from him, but he poked her shoulder to regain her attention.

“Can I ask you something?” He didn’t know why his stomach was so nervous. It didn’t seem like she would yell at him or refuse a simple question, hell, she hadn’t even kicked him out for being somewhere he shouldn’t have.

“Only If I get to ask you one in return,” She stuck her hand out, eyeing him with amusement as he shook her hand and bit his lip.

“What’s your name?”

“Oh, that’s what you want to know?” She laughed again and Doyoung started to feel a little light headed at the sound. It was sort of intoxicating in a way. “I thought you would ask me to not call the cops considering you’re technically breaking a law right now.”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry-”

“I’m kidding!” She hit his shoulder as she laughed and some flour from her fingers transferred onto his black t-shirt. “I’m Y/N, it’s nice to meet you….” She waited.

“Doyoung. My name is Doyoung.”

A smile and nod as thanks, “Doyoung, it’s nice to meet you. It’s not everyday that a cookie monster wanders into this part of town.”

Doyoung rolled his eyes in a playful manner, but let a grin encompass his lips. “Yeah, yeah, make fun. I know I look like an idiot, just ask your question already.”

She looked at the discarded cookie that he had taken a bite from and looked into his eyes. Left then right, back and forth, again and again until she settled on looking into the right one. “Did the cookie taste any good?”

Doyoung hadn’t expected that.

“I’m sorry, what?”

“You know, did the cookie taste decent? I tried a new recipe and I need feedback.” She shrugged her shoulders casually but a deeper look was evident on her face. She genuinely didn’t know that she was possibly the best baker Doyoung had ever encountered.

“That’s a joke, right?” He shook his head and took another bite from the cookie. It had cooled since the first bite, but the inside was just as gooey as ever, “they taste amazing.”

“Really?” Her eyes had brightened at the compliment, and it tugged at something in Doyoung’s heart.

“I’m serious. I don’t even like sweets but everything looks so damn good in here I’m willing to gain 50 pounds if it means getting to eat at least one of everything.”

Her smile looked as if it would reach her ears, and she clasped her hands in delight.

“I’ve never gotten so much wonderful feedback before! Thank you!”

“For stealing your cookie? Anytime if it means that much to you,” He teased but found himself suppressing a laugh of his own. She was so unique, her personality so refreshing.

“Hey uh, I actually came in here looking for chocolates for a friend. Think you could help me out?”

She pursed her lips and tapped a finger to her cheek, “Hmmm, it depends. Do you want normal chocolates? A special flavor or anything? I just finished making some before I came out here. You know you make this kind of unnerving sound when you’re eating something you really like. It alarmed me.”

His cheeks flushed again at that. “Whatever you think is best for a chocolate loving fiend. I’ll trust your guidance.”

She crossed her arms but nodded, “Okay, follow me then.” She turned back and walked into the kitchen and Doyoung merely stuck his head inside the doorway.

“Are you sure I can come back here? Didn’t you say it was like, illegal earlier?”

“Nah, you’re fine. I just wanted to scare you a bit, see how you’d react and all.”

“Dammit, Y/N.” He quickened his pace until he found himself standing next to her, towering over pans of small and intricately designed chocolates that were cooling.

“Woah, these looks really good.”

“You can have one if you want. I can even turn around and you can pretend to steal it too.” She leaned her head on the palm of her hand as she joked.

“You’re certainly something special, Y/N, I’ll give you that.” But he didn’t oblige and took a piece from the table and popped it into his mouth. It melted against his tongue and drove his taste buds into some sort of heaven it never reached before.

“Holy, you must be the confectionery goddess or something. Being this talented isn’t normal.” Doyoung nearly went in for seconds before he caught himself and stood a little taller.

“Can I get these for my friend? I think he’ll actually have a heart attack on the spot.”

She covered her laugh and threw her head back, “God, please don’t try to kill someone with my chocolates, I’m not looking to go to jail anytime soon.” But she moved around him and took the coolest ones from the pans and placed them gently into a box. She held the box against her chest as Doyoung held his hands out.

“Does this mean you will or will not be back after this? Considering you’re not a sweets person after all.” She frowned a bit and Doyoung didn’t know whether it was the fact he didn’t like seeing that look on her face or whether it was because he had a sudden change of character and developed a love for her sweets and her sweets only.

“I will. Just for you.”

She looked away at that and pushed the box into his hands, muttering something under her breath that sounded like “what a flirt.” It made Doyoung feel a bit tingly inside as he never really felt this way before. He was proud of himself for having the confidence to say that and throw her a bit off her game. His witty and fun personality was truly shining through as her face flooded with color and hands laced together behind her back. Her voice was soft once again, but Doyoung had no trouble picking up any words this time, as “I’d like that,” would be the only thing replaying in his mind for the rest of the night.

Doyoung never tripped up on his word. He came back again and again and again. He came so often that she would tease that he should just work with her to give them something to do other than pig out of the leftover pastries. He’d bring her flowers some days because they “complimented the aesthetic,” and other times he brought in small cakes and cookies he made on his own to have them evaluated. They didn’t taste near as good as hers, but she never let him know that. The way his smile grew and legs bounced with delight as she took a bite and gave him a thumbs up was her favorite part of the whole ordeal, and Doyoung didn’t fail to notice the small glances they would sneak at each other during the days.

Doyoung had a weird infatuation with sweets, and it had everything to do with the girl who made them for him. Drawing hearts on the cookies, decorating the cakes with red icing and leaving sugary sweet kisses on his lips was what had Doyoung completely and utterly hooked. The girl who had witnessed his chocolate covered lips and still felt something was head over heels for him, and so she put more chocolate chips into his cookies just for that reason.

Pastries, cookies and cakes are as sweet as can be, but love is something that doesn’t need that added sugar to have a certain sweetness to it.

#doyoung #nct #kim doyoung #doyoung scenario #doyoung imagines #nct scenario #nct imagine #kpop #kpop scenario #kpop imagine #nct127 scenario #nct127 #nct127 imagines #admin madi

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littlefanfics · 6 years

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Things You’d Know if You Could Spare a Moment to Talk to Me

a/n: just a rusty draft. I had inspiration!

Summary: , I'd like to create a private list to Jungkook (never to be shared with Jungkook unless I die): The list of Things You'd Know if You Could Spare a Moment to Talk to Me.

\There's so much to me that is obvious with just a conversation. However my roommate and ex-boyfriend's close friend simply ignored me as he went about his daily life. He had gotten himself a girlfriend a week before I'd moved in, even though they'd long parted, my roommate kept out of sight for the most part, either locked up in his room or out elsewhere.

It was a shame, though I was sure he knew a limited amount of information. Number one, I dated his close friend, Park Jimin, however we both quickly found that he was gay. I wasn't really all that hurt, and being a strong supporter and aly of the LGBTQ community, I'd been happy that he'd found himself because now he seemed so much happier and stronger. In fact, we became extremely close friends, though I knew for a fact our friendship wasn't really a highlight or worth mentioning in their tight-knit friend group. It was only that I needed a place to stay and Jimin was moving out that I'd ended up living with Jungkook and even knowing of his existence.

Number two, while I fooled some, I was foreigner. I may be partially Asian, but I was not of direct Korean descent. I at most had 1% of Korean blood. I don't think that'd particularly count, but in any case here I was in Korea.

And the last would be my name. For obvious reasons, since we were rooming together. We had a system that basically involved Jungkook leaving notes on the kitchen table discussing the bills and whatever had to be done. Usually he did his fair share of whatever and left a note telling me to do the rest.

However, if he a spared a moment to ask me how I was doing, instead of walking out the apartment door without a sign of acknowledgement...

So, without further ado, I'd like to create a private list to Jungkook (never to be shared with Jungkook unless I die): The list of Things You'd Know if You Could Spare a Moment to Talk to Me.

1. My occupation.

I suppose you've probably never been into my room. Today I heard you out in the kitchen, putting away the dishes when you wondered aloud why we had three more knives than you remembered. Had you stepped foot into my room for a second, you'd question whether you've really walked into a college student's room or an assassins.

Ah dear Jungkook, both would be the correct answer. To be fairly honest, I had to pay the bills somehow, and it's not like what I was doing was terribly legal, but I was working under the government. I'm just working in the darker side of the government. Luckily I'm just a small fry, with no need to conceal my identity nor hide what I do. I know it's a little creepy and I don't openly share this information with just anyone, but let's be real. You're my roommate. It's surprising you don't know yet.

Where do you think I get the money to pay the bills? I've already stressed that I'm quite broke, and not receiving any funding from my parents multiple times in your brief presence and on one of the notes in return when OVER NOTE you asked if I could cover a bit of your share of bills. Something about your payment being late. It's strange to have so many serious conversation through sticky notes as if we're middle schooners-except it's all business and no play.

2. My age.

I know perfectly well that Saturday nights are dedicated to your close tight-knit group of friends. My squad used to have that too, but I've moved here, and one girl ended up in France and honestly we're all spread out now rather than close together. Only on Holidays do we gather together now. So I understand how precious your time together is. That's why, despite knowing Hoseok and Jimin incredibly (maybe a little too much so) well, I went straight to my room after returning home from work that night.

However, we're both aware of how thin the walls are. I know we both know it. We've both brought home one-night stands, and I'm perfectly aware that you know. If you slamming the door as you left the apartment one night is any indicator.

So when the huge exclamation "Why does your roommate have blood all over their shirt Jungkook?" followed by a silence I assumed to be your silent response was, I had a confirmation of the first item on the list. I also hear Jimin's perky tone "Do you even know y/n's name?? Or age?" Which of course means I heard your response. I'll admit I'm a little shocked by this one. "Well of course! You just said Y/n's name in that sentence! Which I knew before you added it to the sentence thank you very much."

There was a long silence. I'm sure of it, probably filled with much nonverbal communication, looks of shock being traded among the group maybe, as JImin repeated his earlier question. "Do you know how old y/n is?"

In the tiniest voice I've heard you use (not that I've heard much of your voice), "Twenty... Something?" and you sounded sheepish. The rest of the group exploded into loud exclamations. But they were silenced by my presence as I passed by heading towards the bathroom, having already changed into a fresh set of clothes, impatient to shower and get ride of the sweat riding down my brow.

As I closed the bathroom, the conversation resumed, I heard you guys drop the subject, Jimin still huffing in slight disbelief. You never asked me afterwards. Nothing about the blood nor my age. I asked Jimin later on, who'd shook his head. He said that you were simply unsociable and there was nothing he could do about it. If that's the case, I'd rather like to know where you disappeared every Friday night in order to bring home someone new.

3. My nationality.

I bit back whatever words I said about being sure you knew I was a foreigner. I was home, you were working and I wanted to hook the tv up to my computer for a second screen. And so I did.

I was deep into my Korean geography assignment when you came in. I couldn't quite hear you. You're always so silent on entering the house, but I also had my earbuds in, head facing the TV and thus facing away from you. I was frustrated because it was taking so long, due to me being unfamiliar with the terrain, I was repeated going to maps and searching up where these areas were.

To be honest, I don't even remember what town I was searching for, when I screamed out with frustration "WHERE THE HELL IS [The city in question]" when you snapped, and rather comfortably for someone whose barely held a conversation with me for more than five minutes, "Right outside of Busan you idiot! Are you some foreigner?" And with the shake of a head, disappearing into your room where you resided for the rest of the night... Long gone when I woke up the next morning.

While I'm surprised that you didn't know, to be honest I'm still hurt by that reaction. I don't take kindly to this sort of criticism I suppose. I didn't think you'd feel so... Apathetic towards me. So I'll admit. I texted Jimin, who said he'd "set you straight" whatever that meant. I suppose that means you'll know soon. But you won't know because you talked to me, but rather a mutual friend is going to yell at you.

4. I dislike spicy food. In fact. I can't even eat it at all.

I suppose this one should be an obvious one, considering whenever it's my turn to get the groceries, it's all "bland" food (as one of my Korean friends that you do not know told me). However, you left out spicy food on the table, all wrapped up, with a note. "Sorry, I didn't know you weren't from here. I couldn't tell, which is probably a good thing. Means your Korean is really good. Fighting!"

I opened it up, actually slightly excited, only to find that it was an excruciating kind of spice. I can't have spice at all, Jeon Jungkook. It gives me stomach problems. Too much spice and I'll have an ulcer!

There's a saying, it's the thought that counts, and so I threw it out thinking "thanks" because I felt a little bad. It was a waste a food. Unsure how to respond, I didn't bother leaving a note at all. It's probably not beneficial to our barely existent relationship, but I don't like lying nor do I want to make you upset. I'm not saying that I would be rude about telling you that I didn't eat the food, but that I would feel bad for saying such things.

5. When I binge on ice cream, it's not because of my period. I'm just having a hard time.

I'll admit I'm a little annoyed about this one. Because I was having a netflix binge session with ice cream does not mean that I'm on my period. In fact, cold things induce cramps (for me), and painkillers do not help that pain. So if I were to get my period and had A MOOD, I would probably be munching on cookies or brownies, and definitely have at least one chocolate bar. But I've long got over those monthly binging sessions because life doesn't wait for you, and I just decided to be done with letting mother nature kick me down like that. Instead I limp through hallways whenever I forget the painkillers, and pinch myself any time I get too emotional.

So yeah, it was probably the best call to room for your life if I was sitting there ice cream, because that means I'm upset. And I was. I know that I was upset for a fact. I never did like the part of my job that requires... Torture. I'm definitely not proud of it. Usually I'm given a choice if I want to do it. To be honest, I'm probably the best at getting information out of people before I actually put anything to their skin. However I knew some of the actual torturers at the company and I don't like leaving the people I capture to them. I don't mind killing. It's easy and mindless, and I go back to pretending that I know I'm not hurting people. Usually I'm actually not. I'm not allowed to go into the reasons and the people I kill, but it's much more justified then you'd imagine.

However this guy wouldn't give in. I'd thought I could make him before having to do anything. In the end I ended up crying. He got the satisfaction of making me cry, and the professionals had to finish off the job. I came back home, upset and ready to kill myself.

Honestly I have no right to be this upset, but every time I killed or tortured, it spent a huge weight on me. I was sick of myself. I get sick of everything and everyone around me. "Don't you see I'm a monster?" I'll think.

I was rather satisfied when you saw me, eyes widening, before you rushed off to your room, barely taking off anything or settling down in any way at all. It confirmed that I was the monster that I feel I am.

Yet I heard you speaking into the phone "Yes I'll come over. My roommates got to be on her period. It's vaguely frightening and I can't believe I haven't noticed this before."

That was a little rude, and I sunk back into the couches, pulling the blanket tighter around my shoulders. The mood of my self-pitying took into a different route. It wasn't what I wanted. I was mad at you, but grateful. I didn't want to spend the rest of the night sulking over how I'm a terrible human, but it's not like I wanted to go on a feminist sort of rage (feeling cheated in some odd way). If I were going to be upset I wanted to properly mourn the poor guy I'd unsuccessfully tortured.

6. Your extremely loud arguments bother me quite a bit.

Yes I'm aware that you have a girlfriend. You've had multiple girlfriends. I'm quite aware of more details about your life than I've ever wanted.

While I had to admit it's quite nice to have someone who will clean up after themselves, and will clean up the house (more often than I do). Plus, when you have no one over, it's pretty quiet which is nice. I've had obnoxious roommates, so this is plenty refreshing.

It's the occasional moments that you bring over your girlfriend(s) that bother me. First girlfriend I actually ended up getting acquainted with. She was a sweetheart, maybe a bit loud, but not obnoxiously so. She seemed level headed, so regardless when you started bringing over girls around I was disappointed. She's actually a friend of mine now, which is pretty cool. She's very level headed, logical, she didn't think with her emotions. She considered them a lot sure, but her decision making skills seemed very good. I was surprised to find that you broke up with her and not the other way around, though she's not bitter at all. In fact, she said she was a bit blinded, unable to see it wouldn't work out and was glad that you had broken things off before she grew attached. That also surprised me, but I didn't know a thing about you. I still don't.

I hated your second girlfriend. She was always obnoxiously loud, and glared as well. You guys would fight, and I've heard her accuse you of cheating on her with me of all people. After probably three hours of screaming at each other you guys had obnoxiously loud makeup sex. Notice how I'm using obnoxiously a lot? That's because it was. It was obnoxious. It was unpalatable, distasteful, insufferable, loathsome, foul, intolerable... Except I tolerated her.

By the way, she broke the crystal necklace my mother gave me, and yes. I'm forcing her to pay off the damage. It was not only expensive, but had something of sentimental value to me. That's probably why she slapped you. Sorry about that.

Ahh... This is probably your fifth girlfriend that you've just broken up. You've had six since I've known you, and only one of them have broken up with you. Let me tell you. Girlfriend (or ex-girlfriend) number six was by far the worst. Not because she broke anything, but how insulting she was.

First of all, she's the second girl to accuse you of cheating on her with ME. I barely even know you, so it's ridiculous, and while I'm sure it's merely because we live together it's still vexing to be despised by all these petty women. And treated accordingly.

She broke the TV when you guys broke up. And I know, I won't have to take care of the damage but in the meantime, I'm watching netflix on my laptop and it's just not the same.

Also your makeup sex was the most annoying. Mostly because of her excessive moaning. If she just had crazy kinks I'd be fine. But she'd still mention me while you were probably balls deep in her, and I have a knack for hearing my name. Not to mention HOW LONG IT WAS. I'd be sexiled (sort of. The noise forces me to leave) and by lord. I'll leave, probably do some shopping, and you'd still be at it.

Jeon Jungkook... I'm sorry to have known you so well in this way. It's not like I wanted to overhear such things, but I did.

7. My parents died years back. Oh yeah. And I have brothers.

That's why I have no funding from my parents. Inheritance is all I have, and it's not much. I wasn't the only child. I have two older brothers. Probably why I'm so capable of fighting. While Willy is now a drag queen, and Tommy's an official nerd, they were both the stereotypical boys at one point, and I played with them and their friends which is what helped make me so tough. As they grew up, Tommy began developing as a nerd, and Willy started wearing heels. I wasn't going to let anyone drag (ha! Pun!) them down. So I fought those bullies. It's not like there was a lot, but I was good at fighting.

We had a two minute (recording breaking... Probably. I don't count) conversation about the bills again.

"Sorry could you cover half of my rent? My paycheck is late again." You were stark naked, the towel covering your lower half, leaving your chest naked in all it's fine glory as I stood in my black clothes, ready to go to work, not quite at the door, but somewhere in the vicinity. I narrowed my eyes, because this wasn't the first time, though I knew you would pay me back.

I had recently paid for next semester. I couldn't magically make your half appear. "Sorry I can't." I frowned, pulling my jacket over me, before taking my boots off the rack, carefully unlacing them. I looked up.

"Can't you just like... I don't know. Ask your parents or something? You know I'll give it back." You huffed.

"I can't." I replied sharply, because while I'm not shy about the fact, it's still a sensitive subject, especially since we've gone over this in a note somewhere. I'm positive we have. I finished lacing up my shoes, tying it tightly with anger. As I opened the door, I noticed you were gone.

8. Sorry about your fifth girlfriend.

This might make things weird but I slept with your fifth girlfriend. Her hair was short and choppy, rather small and cute, but she dressed tough. Despite this she still looked adorable, and I have a weakness for cute girls. I'm reluctant to identify as queer, but I was most definitely queer for her.

I know for a fact you don't know this. But she approached me, and rather ungracefully asked if I'd be interested in dating her after you guys broke up. It escalated, and never really became a relationship, though I've had plenty of conversation with her before. I'm sure that if I really wanted to, we could've made a relationship out of what friendship we'd acquired. Somewhere in between making coffee in the morning, we'd grown close. I really liked her. I guess it's a bit of a shame that we only hooked up several times. At the same time, being in a relationship with her while we're still rooming would have created more tension. Probably. And made things really awkward. If we ever get to talking about something other than basic necessities, I'll tell you. I promised myself. I feel bad about it, but that hasn't happened yet. On the bright side (for you), we still can't look at each other after how things ended.

(To Be Continued... (: Probably)

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