#back to useless lyrics edits <3

[myymi]

ohh if you can i would appreciate some tips!! honestly writers are so admirable we dont give yall enough credit🙏🙏🙏

well, for me to give you the absolute best tips i can to help out, i need to know what exactly you're struggling with when it comes to writing. there are about a million different tips i can give you for about a million different things and some of those tips will be completely useless to you

for now though, i'll give you the things that help me getting into a writing mood + general tips i give to new writers and if you still need further help you can explain what exactly you're struggling with and ill do my best to help out;

1) whatever you learned about formatting essays; forget it.

a common thing i see in new writers is they try to write it like an essay. which isn't a bad idea really, but it is restricting. your paragraphs don't have to be four or more sentences. they can only be one if you want. it's your story, format it however you want. you don't need to follow rules

2) listening to music

this is mostly for when you have that one specific scene in your head but have no idea what to do for the rest of the fic. listening to music and connecting the lyrics to the characters you're using is a great way to get your mind thinking. one song can give you several different ideas depending on how you interpret it

3) make sure you are in a good mood

personally, i cannot write to save my life if im upset or just generally having a bad day. i know some people can use creating as a way to cheer themselves up, but it just doesn't work out for me lol

4) if you don't need background noise, don't use it

it's pretty easy to get distracted when writing, especially when you have something new playing. if you do need background noise of some kind, i would advise playing instrumental music or that one movie/show that you've seen a thousand times and could quote in your sleep. keep your focus on your writing

5) brackets will be your best fucking friend when writing

one of the most important things about writing is keeping your flow going. if you find yourself writing sentence after sentence for a good while and then you suddenly hit a stop because you don't know how to word what happens next; throw it in brackets and write the scene after it. its the same reason why you're told to skip questions you get stuck on when taking a test. let your brain do what it knows it can and come back to the tricky stuff later.

6) you don't have to write anything in order

you don't have to write a story exactly start to finish. you can jump between any scene you'd like and find out how to connect it to a different scene another time. this kinda ties into the last tip in the sense that you gotta let your brain do what it knows. if you only know the beginning and the end then write those first and figure out the rest as you go. if you need to edit either one of the previous things then that's okay. there's no shame in changing things around, it's just how creating things go. sometimes change is needed

7) writing prompts

for new writers, i like to tell them to find a prompt online to write a story for before they start their own. using a prompt someone else made keeps your brain from getting overwhelmed, allowing you to focus more on finding a writing style that works best for you. using writing prompts also lets your brain find ways to contribute to a story without having it make everything while also figuring out how to put it on paper. it's easy to overwhelm the brain, so let it get used to writing before you start creating your own ideas. (this is also something i advise to people who experience burnout or just cant think of anything to write. your brain just needs a break from creating ideas right now, go and find a prompt for it)

8) word count

listen to me because this is so important; ignore the word count. you need to focus on learning, not how much you're writing. it doesn't matter if you only wrote 50 words when other people have fics well over 50k. ignore it. you are learning, you'll get there eventually. if you focus too much on how much you're writing you're going to stress yourself out and ultimately drive yourself away from ever writing again. treat word counts as milestones. start with 50, then 100, then 150, then 200, etc. let yourself work towards it slowly rather than push yourself too hard right out the gate. you can't expect to draw the mona lisa the first time you put a pencil to a paper, so don't expect to write thousands of words the first time you write a story. it'll take time, and that's perfectly okay.

9) analyze the shit out of your characters

this is easier when writing fanfiction, but take a few hours to learn your characters. find the content they're in and hyper-focus on what they're doing. pay attention to their speech patterns, their body language, their relationships with others, etc. if they're not in a scene, try to imagine they are and what'd they do and/or say if they were. it'll help out with keeping them in character when writing

10) if you get to a point where you can't write anymore even when using brackets; stop writing for the day

we have our limits. you will get to a point where you can't get another word down and that's okay. it doesn't matter if you've only written a handful of words, close your program and wait until you feel motivation hit you again. if you keep trying to force yourself to write when you just can't then you're going to burn yourself out. the most probable reason for this is writer's block, which means you need to focus on other things for a while. give your brain time to recollect itself. it's annoying, i know, but it's better for you if you just let your brain do what it needs to. it knows how to take care of itself, so let it.

i also have a tag i use whenever i give tips, so you can check those out as well to see if anything helps! it's just writing tips

#if these end up not helping you that is okay #everyone is different #what works for me wont always work for you #mess around with it until something does work #just remember not to push yourself too hard #learning takes time. don't rush it #writing things #writing asks #writing tips #anon #anonymous #anon ask

[beautifulpersonpeach]

GODDAMMM JIMIN YOUR VOICE!!!!!

*

Ask 2: What’s your verdict on Vibe bpp? Im not very knowledgable but it sounded like what i heard in radios back in the 2000s, i saw people say that its not very kpop, do you agree? I wasnt into it until jimin came in dunno if I was just biased lol.. I’m was very surprised at the level of participation Jimin had in this song.. Turns out he even wrote some of the lyrics enough to get credit.. and i feel like he got half of the verses And spotlight in the MV too! Maybe cuz its his first official collab but I was surprised at him advertising it in his ig lol he’s never done that before.. it looks like theyre planning on doing music shows too!!! Curious to see how this collab will do in the charts too.

*

Ask 3: So. What did you think of it? Doesn’t Jimin look absolutely gorgeous? My heart.

#Vibe #ParkJimin #KillMe #WhatImDeadAlready

*

Ask 4: WILL HE BE PERFORMING AT A SHOW?!?! LIVE?!?!?!

*

Ask 5: heyyy bpp!! with the bigbangtan collab turning out to not be a hoax a lot of people are now hoping for a blacktan collab someday. do u think its possible? imho it might be a possibility but tbh i just cant see there styles and philosophies meshing well at all at least not until bp comes out with music that is very diff from what theyve done so far and i just cant see that happening any time soon bec even their solos so far arent that good imo. what do u think?

***

Hi Anon(s)!

VIBE is very much giving me 80s groove mixes, stripped back. Only thing missing is a Kenny G saxophone solo.

My favourite parts/timestamps:

1:55 - I love how they stripped back the instrumentals in Jimin's chorus so we really **hear** him. God, his voice. It's almost acapella and I'm glad Teddy had the sense to not bury that magic under useless synths.

2:17 - What is it with Jimin and bridges? He understands the assignment. Every single time.

*

Because I was aware of my bias going into it, I gave this song a few more listens than I typically do before forming an opinion. And like I suspected, the only reason I like this song is because of Jimin.

Taeyang gave me nothing to work with I'm sorry. The D'Angelo aesthetic failed to land, the only person who brought sauce to this joint is Park Jimin. I think even Taeyang, Teddy and co recognize that too, because though it's Taeyang's song and technically a feature, it feels like Jimin's song with Taeyang featuring. (The lines split is also smart from a business POV because it will get ARMYs and Jimin solo stans to buy/stream it more). Jimin has writing credits [*] so I can only assume he wrote his verses because the difference between his verse and Taeyang's is like night and day, and in Jimin's verse, the lack of gendered pronouns is something I can't help but notice.

In terms of jikook/ML collabs so far, I actually prefer this to Left & Right and Dreamers, but I like Bad Decisions more. So I'm giving this song a solid 6.8/10. It's a decent track and the hook is fun to sing. And thankfully, the song is short enough.

Frankly, if this single was supposed to whet people's appetites for Taeyang's album, it does the opposite for me, but it does do that for me with Jimin with PJM1. I **need** to hear more Jimin.

Anon in Ask 4, Taeyang has said there's a live performance so it's possible we get to see Jimin perform it live with him. (Jimin is blonde right now, in case anyone forgot)

Anon in Ask 5, you might not have heard, but ARMYs have a running joke that the tannies collab with people unlikeable to the fandom. I think a collab between Blackpink and BTS/any of the members is certainly possible (everything is possible in Chapter 2), but it will be a character building exercise for everyone involved.

And y'all know all I really do in those sorts of situations is laugh.

My favourite shot:

*

It's a bit unfair to Taeyang to have him dance beside Jimin, honestly. But he managed to hold his own for the most part. The live will be fun to watch.

*

*

*

(Jimin's dance lines are perfection)

***

[*] EDIT: Updating this to correct that Jimin has composing credits on Vibe, not writing credits. Only Taeyang and Vince have writing credits. So for Jimin’s verse I can assume Vince did the writing, and if Taeyang did then even more kudos to him honestly (though it begs the question… you know what, I’ll drop it lol). And again, the lack of gendered pronouns for Jimin’s verse sticks out (which is probably true for any queer listener tbh).

#jimin #park jimin #jimin x taeyang #vibe #bts #bts in chapter 2 #bts chapter 2

[farewell-persephone]

2, 21, 37, 48 😎

2. One of the most meaningful things someone has said to you?

tried to think of something more specific but just keep coming back to the fact that every time I see my friend Zach he tells me he loves me before we part ways. helps with the feeling that I'm a burden or an embarrassment that I always experience when I'm around anyone, especially this last time given everything that happened.

21. Share a song or two that you find calming?

this is harder than I thought it would be because "calming" kind of implies "neutral" to me and I just don't listen to music that makes me feel neutral. this is probably the closest I can think of. Japanese train nu-jazz

37. A show/game/book someone could consume to know you better?

show: maybe Dark idk

game: Fallout New Vegas

book: Acceptance by Jeff VanderMeer

48. Ah, 48. This question is very important

Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart displayed scatological humour in his letters and multiple recreational compositions. This material has long been a puzzle for Mozart scholarship. Some scholars try to understand it in terms of its role in Mozart's family, his society and his times; others attempt to understand it as a result of an "impressive list"[2] of psychiatric conditions from which Mozart is claimed to have suffered.

Examples[edit]

Self-portrait in pencil of Maria Anna Thekla Mozart, from 1777 or 1778

A letter dated 5 November 1777[3] to Mozart's cousin Maria Anna Thekla Mozart is an example of Mozart's use of scatology. The German original[4] is in rhymed verse.

Well, I wish you good night, but first, Shit in your bed and make it burst. Sleep soundly, my love Into your mouth your arse you'll shove.[5]

Mozart's canon "Leck mich im Arsch" K. 231 (K6 382c) includes the lyrics:

Leck mich im A[rsch] g'schwindi, g'schwindi!

This would be translated into English as "lick me in the arse, quickly, quickly!"

"Leck mich im Arsch" is a standard vulgarism in German, euphemistically called the Swabian salute (German: schwäbischer Gruß). Although contemporary German would rather say "Leck mich am Arsch."[6] The closest English counterpart is "Kiss my arse".

Context[edit]

Musicologist David Schroeder writes:

The passage of time has created an almost unbridgeable gulf between ourselves and Mozart's time, forcing us to misread his scatological letters even more drastically than his other letters. Very simply, these letters embarrass us, and we have tried to suppress them, trivialize them, or explain them out of the epistolary canon with pathological excuses.[7]

For example, when Margaret Thatcher was apprised of Mozart's scatology during a visit to the theatre to see Peter Shaffer's play Amadeus, director Peter Hall relates:

She was not pleased. In her best headmistress style, she gave me a severe wigging for putting on a play that depicted Mozart as a scatological imp with a love of four-letter words. It was inconceivable, she said, that a man who wrote such exquisite and elegant music could be so foul-mouthed. I said that Mozart's letters proved he was just that: he had an extraordinarily infantile sense of humour ... "I don't think you heard what I said", replied the Prime Minister. "He couldn't have been like that". I offered (and sent) a copy of Mozart's letters to Number Ten the next day; I was even thanked by the appropriate Private Secretary. But it was useless: the Prime Minister said I was wrong, so wrong I was.[8]

Letters[edit]

Benjamin Simkin, an endocrinologist,[9] estimates that 39 of Mozart's letters include scatological passages. Almost all of these are directed to Mozart's own family, specifically his father Leopold, his mother Anna Maria, his sister Nannerl, and his cousin Maria Anna Thekla Mozart. According to Simkin, Leopold, Anna Maria and Nannerl also included scatological humour in their own letters.[10] Thus, Anna Maria wrote to her husband (26 September 1777; original is in rhyme):

Addio, ben mio. Keep well, my love. Into your mouth your arse you'll shove. I wish you good night, my dear, But first, shit in your bed and make it burst.[11]

Even the relatively straitlaced Leopold used a scatological expression in one letter.[12]

Several of Mozart's scatological letters were written to Maria Anna Thekla Mozart, his cousin (and probable love interest, according to the musicologist Maynard Solomon).[13] These are often called the "Bäsle letters", after the German word Bäsle, a diminutive form meaning "little cousin". In these letters, written after Mozart had spent a pleasant two weeks with his cousin in her native Augsburg,[14] the scatology is combined with word play and sexual references. American academic Robert Spaethling's rendered translation of part of a letter Mozart sent from Mannheim 5 November 1777:

Dearest cozz buzz! I have received reprieved your highly esteemed writing biting, and I have noted doted thy my uncle garfuncle, my aunt slant, and you too, are all well mell. We, too thank god, are in good fettle kettle ... You write further, indeed you let it all out, you expose yourself, you let yourself be heard, you give me notice, you declare yourself, you indicate to me, you bring me the news, you announce unto me, you state in broad daylight, you demand, you desire, you wish, you want, you like, you command that I, too, should could send you my Portrait. Eh bien, I shall mail fail it for sure. Oui, by the love of my skin, I shit on your nose, so it runs down your chin...[15]

One of the letters Mozart wrote to his father while visiting Augsburg reports an encounter Mozart and his cousin had with a priest named Father Emilian:

[He was] an arrogant ass and a simple-minded little wit of his profession ... finally when he was a little drunk, which happened soon, he started on about music. He sang a canon, and said: I have never in my life heard anything more beautiful ... He started. I took the third voice, but I slipped in an entirely different text: 'P[ater] E: o du schwanz, leck mich im arsch' ["Father Emilian, oh you prick, lick me in the arse"]. Sotto voce, to my cousin. Then we laughed together for another half hour.[16]

Music[edit]

Mozart's scatological music was most likely recreational and shared among a closed group of inebriated friends. All of it takes the form of canons (rounds), in which each voice enters with the same words and music following a delay after the previous voice. Musicologist David J. Buch writes:

It may seem strange that Mozart made fair copies, entered these items into his personal works catalogue (in which he tended to omit ephemeral works) and allowed them to be copied. The reason he favored these small and crude pieces in ways similar to his more serious and important works remains a mystery.[17]

Reactions of family and friends[edit]

Historian Lucy Coatman argues that Maria Anna Thekla and Mozart likely had a shared sense of humour, something which she believes has been "discounted throughout much of the historiography on this set of correspondence".[18]: 3  While scholars are not aware of her replies to her cousin, it can be assumed from what is known of their relationship and his continued correspondence that she was likely not offended by Mozart's vulgar references.

In 1798, Constanze sent her late husband's Bäsle letters to the publishers Breitkopf & Härtel, who at the time were gathering material in hopes of preparing a Mozart biography.[19] In the accompanying letter she wrote "Although in dubious taste, the letters to his cousin are full of wit and deserve mentioning, although they cannot of course be published in their entirety."[20] K.A. Aterman suggests that this ambivalence is a result of the "change in the taste and the 'refinement' spreading to, and in, the rising middle class" in the early 19th century.[21]

In the 18th century[edit]

Gottfried Prehauser, an actor of 18th-century Vienna, playing Hanswurst

Schroeder (1999) suggests that in the 18th century scatological humour was far more public and "mainstream". The German-language popular theatre of Mozart's time was influenced by the Italian commedia dell'arte and emphasized the stock character of Hanswurst, a coarse and robust character who would entertain his audience by pretending to eat large and unlikely objects (for instance, a whole calf), then defecating them.[22]

Schroeder suggests a political underlay to the scatology in popular theatre: its viewers lived under a system of hereditary aristocracy that excluded them from political participation. The vulgarity of scatological popular theatre was a counterpoint to the refined culture imposed from above.[23] One of Mozart's own letters describes aristocrats in scatological terms; he identified the aristocrats present at a concert in Augsburg (1777) as "the Duchess Smackarse, the Countess Pleasurepisser, the Princess Stinkmess, and the two Princes Potbelly von Pigdick".[24]

In German culture[edit]

The folklorist and cultural anthropologist Alan Dundes suggested that interest in or tolerance for scatological matters is a specific trait of German national culture, one which is retained to this day:[25]

In German folklore, one finds an inordinate number of texts concerned with anality. Scheiße (shit), Dreck (dirt), Mist (manure), Arsch (ass), and other locutions are commonplace. Folksongs, folktales, proverbs, folk speech—all attest to the Germans' longstanding special interest in this area of human activity. I am not claiming that other peoples of the world do not express a healthy concern for this area, but rather that the Germans appear to be preoccupied with such themes. It is thus not so much a matter of difference as it is of degree.[26]

Dundes (1984) provides ample coverage of scatological humor in Mozart, but also cites scatological texts from Martin Luther, Johann Wolfgang von Goethe, Heinrich Heine, and others who helped shaped German culture. Karhausen (1993) asserts that "scatology was common in Mitteleuropa [central Europe]", noting for instance that Mozart's Salzburg colleague Michael Haydn also wrote a scatological canon.[27]

Some of the phrases used by Mozart in his scatological material were not original with him but were part of the folklore and culture of his day: professor of German Mieder (2003) describes the Bäsle letters as involving "Mozart's intentional play with what is for the most part preformulated folk speech".[28] An example given by Robert Spaethling is the folkloric origin of a phrase seen above, "Gute Nacht, scheiß ins Bett dass' Kracht", claimed by Spaethling to be a "children's rhyme that is still current in south German language areas today".[29] Likewise, when Mozart sang to Aloysia Weber the words "Leck mich das Mensch im Arsch, das mich nicht will" ("Whoever doesn't want me can lick my arse") on the occasion of being romantically rejected by her, he was evidently singing an existing folk tune, not a song of his own invention.[30]

Medical accounts[edit]

An early 20th-century observer who suspected that Mozart's scatological materials could be interpreted by psychological pathologies was the Austrian writer Stefan Zweig, who amassed a large collection of musical manuscripts. His collection included the Bäsle letters (at the time, unpublished) as well as the autographs of Mozart's scatological canons "Difficile lectu" and "O du eselhafter Peierl".[31] Zweig sent copies of the Bäsle letters to the psychiatrist Sigmund Freud with the following suggestion:

These nine letters ... throw a psychologically very remarkable light on his erotic nature, which, more so than any other important man, has elements of infantilism and coprophilia. It would actually be a very interesting study for one of your pupils.[32]

Freud apparently declined Zweig's suggestion. As Schroeder notes, later psychobiographers seized on the letters as evidence for psychopathological tendencies in Mozart.[33]

Some authors in the 1990s interpreted the material as evidence that Mozart had Tourette syndrome (TS).[34] Simkin catalogued the scatological letters and compared their frequencies with similar vulgarisms from other members of Mozart's family—they are far more frequent. The scatological materials were combined by Simkin with biographical accounts from Mozart's own time that suggested that Mozart suffered from the tics characteristic of Tourette syndrome.[35] His claim was picked up by newspapers worldwide, causing an international sensation, and internet websites have fueled the speculation.[36]

While often discussed, the Mozart/Tourette hypothesis has failed to sway mainstream opinion on this issue. Indeed, German psychiatrist Thomas Kammer (2007) states that the work proposing the hypothesis has been "promptly and harshly" criticized.[2] The critical commentary asserts both medical misdiagnosis and errors of Mozart scholarship.[37] Kammer concluded that "Tourette's syndrome is an inventive but implausible diagnosis in the medical history of Mozart". Evidence of motor tics was found lacking and the notion that involuntary vocal tics are transferred to the written form was labeled "problematic".[2] Neurologist and author Oliver Sacks published an editorial disputing Simkin's claim,[38] and the Tourette Syndrome Association pointed out the speculative nature of this information.[36] No Tourette's syndrome expert or organization has voiced concurrence that there is credible evidence to conclude that Mozart had Tourette's.[39] One TS specialist stated that "although some websites list Mozart as an individual who had Tourette's or OCD, it's not clear from the descriptions of his behavior that he actually had either".[40]

Coatman, who supports a social and philological explanation of Mozart's scatology, has suggested that such retrospective diagnoses reveal a problem with the perusal of letters as a genre. Following ethicist Osamu Muramoto,[41]. she states that "retrospecive diagnosis can be challenged not only on an epistemic level but also on the ontological and ethical ones".[18]: 5  She notes that by projecting modern sensibilities back onto the letters, scholars from a range of fields have "failed to understand the historical context, language usage of eighteenth-century Salzburg, and indeed, the personality of Mozart".[18]: 2 

Scatological materials[edit]

In letters[edit]

Benjamin Simkin's compilation lists scatological letters by Mozart to the following individuals:[35]

his father, Leopold Mozart: twenty letters

his wife, Constanze Mozart: six letters

his cousin Maria Anna Thekla Mozart: six letters

his sister Maria Anna Mozart (Nannerl): four letters

his mother Anna Maria Mozart: one letter

his mother and sister jointly: one letter

his Salzburg friend Abbé Joseph Bullinger: one letter

his friend, the choirmaster Anton Stoll, for whom he wrote Ave verum corpus: one letter

In music[edit]

The canons were first published after Mozart's death with bowdlerized lyrics;[citation needed] for instance, "Leck mir den Arsch fein rein" ("Lick me in the arse nice and clean") became "Nichts labt mich mehr als Wein" ("Nothing refreshes me more than wine"). In some cases, only the first line of the original scatological lyrics is preserved. The following list is ordered by Köchel catalog number. Voices and conjectured dates are from Zaslaw & Cowdery (1990:101–105); and links marked "score" lead to the online edition of the Neue Mozart-Ausgabe.

"Leck mich im Arsch" ("Lick me in the arse"), K. 231 (K6 382c), for six voices. (Score). Composed some time in the 1780s. First published as "Lass froh uns sein" ("Let us be joyful").

"Leck mir den Arsch fein recht schön sauber" ("Lick my arse right well and clean"), K. 233 (K6 382d). (Score). First published as "Nichts labt mich mehr als Wein" ("Nothing pleases me more than wine"). The music of this canon was once thought to be by Mozart but was shown in 1988 by Wolfgang Plath to be by Wenzel Trnka, originally to the Italian words "Tu sei gelosa, è vero".[42] As the editors of the Neue Mozart-Ausgabe note, the work almost certainly should be considered a work of Mozart's, but as the author of the lyrics rather than as the composer.[43]

"Bei der Hitz im Sommer eß ich" ("In the heat of summer I eat"), K. 234 (K6 382e). (Score). As with K. 233, the music is not by Mozart; originally it was the canon "So che vanti un cor ingrato" by Wenzel Trnka.[citation needed]

"Gehn wir im Prater, gehn wir in d' Hetz", K. 558, for four voices. (Score). 1788 or earlier.

Difficile lectu mihi Mars, K. 559, for three voices. (Score). C. 1786–1787.

O du eselhafter Peierl, ("Oh, you asinine Peierl") for four voices, K. 560a. (Score). C. 1786–1787. A slightly revised version, "O du eselhafter Martin", is catalogued as K. 560b.

"Bona nox" ("Good night") K. 561, for four voices. (Score). 1788 or earlier.

#ask #kvtie-pie #lmao thanks Anna <3

[thschei]

I wrote a bunch of tags on that and then realized the post would show up in the tag unless I censored the ship name (& tbh I would love more mutuals for them <3) so I rewrote them here to not annoy anyone who's not following me:

I haven't had the editing bug in months but I'd love to use that song for an edit, but tbqh I'm undecided bc almost all of my ships have that "I'm hunting you and I'm not gonna give up so you should just give up hiding from me bc it's useless and I'll always find you and your life will be so much better and all of this was predetermined fate destiny we were made for each other and you're hurting my feelings but I'm being the bigger person :/" vibe

(well no the Master is not being the bigger person . Sometimes he deludes himself into acting like he is tho . He picks between acting like he's being a good sport about things and throwing a tantrum, whichever would be the most fun thing to do in the moment . Anyway . )

But if anyone wanted to do an edit to it, I wouldn't mind or claim that it was *~stealing~*

And how hard is it to get a lyric video for my album track from 7 yrs ago that isn't using stolen art or flashing lights or 10 pt font? 🤨 Do I have to do it myself? Slash lighthearted but like I might just fuck around and do it

I wasn't super into this track when the album came out but I was a different person back then . more restrained, living more by the status quo . more easily put-off by dark things . So like, a teenager . It's amazing what things will change about you/your mind when you're not in high school anymore

I do find sam/ifer to be hashtag romantic, I & overall ignore canon & believe it's reciprocated (tho ofc sometimes it's fun and sexy to read the most horrifyingly dark fic you've ever seen that's like 40 chapters of torture <3) but I also love that it's a horror story and there's no happy endings and it's an eldritch being hunting a person it was promised by god, in this patronizing tone: you don't see yet? Our joining was predetermined; you'll see eventually.

#erin talks #text #you see. you see why all that didn't need to show up in the tag 😭

[loversmore]

bts, favourite lyrics (3/?) ♡ butterfly. 내게 약속해줄래, will you promise me?

#bts #btsedit #btslyrics #butterfly #bangtan #btsdaily #*lyrics #*btslyrics #cr tr. lyricstranslate.com #back to useless lyrics edits <3 #emsigifs

[clarz-cc-archive]

answered May 15, 2020

Q: well, first of all what i can is that vmon good but also YOU good! other than that, life works in funny ways and i've watched bits and pieces by complete luck of namjoon's solo live earlier this year and of the new burn the stage thing (does anyone know its actual name or are we all pretending?) and i just want to add two anedoctes that are dear to my heart: 1) from namjoon's live, where he talks about tae and how he couldn't stop thinking about taehyung's honest reaction (in bv4) at the night sky. namjoon looked so delighted and surprised, it was so sweet. like, him still getting touched and surprised by someone who's known for almost a decade. i love how he's come to admire all of them, but in this case i love how namjoon admires taehyung specifically. 2) at one point during the new series there was taehyung trying to write his own song and i loved how he described namjoon's song writing as poetical (he was also not being super kind to himself maybe, but he was honest and i only wish him the best) ADDITIONS because while writing i remembered of something else, like during bv4 where namjoon decided to stay back and work on a song and he was having a hard time, when the other boys all came back, taehyung went inside the van and caressed namjoon's shoulder so softly. it's such a small thing, but i loved it so much?? namjoon was frowning and feeling sad [as he said later, in the last episode, he tried to compensate how "useless he is" with work, so he could feel useful and less bad. now this is a whole other thing that i'd like to talk about. i want to hug namjoon after that interview] and then he tried his best to hear about taehyung's day. i love how they also speak to each other through touches, which is a lot coming from namjoon (in response to, ask #2 in this thread)

A: (nobody knows the name, we're absolutely all pretending 😂) i just think of them all as burn the stage 1 2 and 3 in my head tbh. one of the things i do love about vmon is that i feel like namjoon has such a tendency to get inside his own head, whereas i feel like taehyung is very good at getting outside his own head, not that taehyung doesn't have deep thoughts or worries or whatever, but i think that when taehyung decides that he wants to engage he can be really good at being in the moment and going with the flow and just like, allowing the experience to exist as it is. and while i still haven't seen bv4, to see namjoon being amazed and touched by this ability of tae's is something very special i think! i also think it's so sweet how taehyung wrote 4 o'clock with namjoon and also had namjoon help him with the lyrics to winter bear and that it means a lot that he trusts namjoon to help him with something as weirdly vulnerable as a creative work-in-process can be. god, that shoulder touching story 😭 taehyung is SUCH a sweet considerate boy 😭 also wasn't there also a part of bv2 (EDIT: i meant bv1! brain bad!) where namjoon also stayed back to work on a song while everyone else was out doing stuff? that boy really cannot resist putting everything on his own shoulders. for them to have talked in the bangtan attic about how just after debut namjoon was even MORE stressed and took on even MORE responsibility, like, crazy to think that what we see of him in the past few years is a Chiller Version of anything!

threads in response to this one: #1

#bangtan #vmon #meta #taehyung #namjoon

[heyemmaaaa]

I can't think of anything I can give you this valentines' day so I edited the playlist I sent u 2 days ago of some of my on repeat songs and here's its part 2 : my fave lyrics and a short message.

Intentionally di ko nilagyan ng title kasi inassume ko na tinapos mo pakinggan

P.S- recommended to play the playlist while listening. 🤭

#1

"Mahiwaga, pipiliin ka sa araw-araw.

Mahiwaga, ang nadarama sayo'y malinaw"

I'll choose you everyday. Even if there will be times na you'll think hindi ka na kapili-pili, I would still choose you. 😌 cheesyyyyy.

#2

"There is nothing I can ask for

There is no one else but you

You are everything I hoped for."

It's not a secret I liked you for 8 years and within those years, I kept on praying for u that sometimes it gets so frustrating cos I know it's useless. But I kept on praying anyway (read previous entries). Love na love pa rin ako ni Lord (or nakulitan lang kaya pinagbigyan. Hahaha 😆) kaya there is nothing I can ask for pa talaga. 😌

#3

"Sometimes I run

Sometimes I hide

Sometimes I'm scared of you

But all I really want is to hold you tight. Treat you right"

Sorry for those times you felt i'm pushing you away pero thank you for being patient with me and for understanding me. It's not easy on your part kasi I've made you feel many times na ayaw ko sayo and alam kong aware ka na I have trust issues pero you still continued pero despite everything, what i really wanted lang talaga is to be clingy and sweet and caring and loving and etc to u. HAHAHA 🙊

#4

"So close yet still so far"

Trivia lang. Ikaw first dance ko nung 4th year hs grad ball tapos eto yung song na yun. 🙈

Kailan ba tayo magiging so close and so near? Char. I can't wait to see you. Sana mahintay mo pa ko. Kasi ako sure ako na mahihintay kita. 🥺

#5

"You lift my feet off the ground

You spin me around

You make me crazier"

This is how I feel everyday knowing yung long time crush ko, gusto rin ako. 🥰🙈

#6

"It's you they add up to.

I'm in love with you.

And all your little things"

Trivia again. Ikaw first dance ko 3rd year social night, ito yung song na nag p'play. 🙊

Di naman obvious na between the two of us , ako yung head over heels sayo no? 😕

#7

"This is falling in love in the cruelest way

This is falling for you and you are worlds away"

Yung first ever relationship ko if ever, LDR. pero okay lang basta ikaw. In fact, it's the person not the distance. 😌 i play this song whenver i miss u so much and it's getting so frustrating cos wala akong magawa to see u personally kasi im not mayaman like taylor swift. 😔 take note lang po, pag lumipad na ko pa US, umaga sayo, gabi sa akin. I'm scared baka bigla kang umayaw in the long run. Lol. 🥺

#8

"Nothing I wouldn't do

Go to the ends of the earth for you

To make you feel my love"

I'll do anything for u as long as i can. (Except lang sa pag change ng habit when it comes to eating. hehe mwaa)

#9

"And today I'm officially missing you"

Hindi lang today. everyday. 😔

# 10

"You are my favorite. Everything"

Favorite asarin. Favorite iPrank. Favorite kwentuhan. Favorite person. Favorite in general. 😘

# 11

"And I could list a million things i'd love to like about you"

Tho I don't know if you love me. Hahaha char 😳 pero i like the way you care, the way you remind me and get angry after but still reminds me anyway, the way your voice calms me down and make me smile, the way you say i miss u when u're tired and everything in between.

#12

"At ngayon, nandyan ka na

Di mapaliwanag ang nadarama"

Nanuod lang talaga ko hello love goodbye kaya nasama to. Charot. Niloloko ko ni mega one time, eto daw yung theme song. HAHAHAHA funneh.

#13

"And I've been in a daze

Ever since the day we met"

I'm still amazed at you in general. The way you smile and everything. I still can look at you entire day and still caught myself smiling. Will always be ur no. 1 fan. 😏 gotchu

# 14

"You calm me down

There's something bout the sound of your voice"

I really do not know how it happens anyway. But I like how u do it. Effortlessly. 🥰

#15

"I take one step away

Then I find myself coming back to you"

It's was, is and will always be u po. 😉

You make me really happy. Thank you for making me the happiest, thank you for making me trust again and know that i'll always be here for u in every possible way. whether u like it or not. Balakajan. Wala ka nang choice. U need to bear with me and my toyoin days (na di ko na dadalasan as u requested) Hahahaha 😌

Here's to more Vday with u. LDR man o hindi. Official man or not. 🥺 char not char

I added Have you ever and never had a dream come true (fave songs when cleaning 🤭) and some westlife songs and other songs that I've been listening to these past days.

#Spotify

[finishtheboat]

Tell Him (Colby x Reader)

Hey beautiful people! 

Here goes my first Colby fic. I have no idea if its cool or if its shit, but I’m happy with it. 

Pairing: Colby Brock x Reader

Warnings: A couple swear words, pink fluffy unicorns, Colby getting a little hurt (not much tho he okay).

Requested: Do I look like-

Notes: The first words are lyrics to It’s A Hard Life by Queen. It has nothing to do with the story but its dope af. Another thing, the reader has brown eyes and is referenced later on in the lyrics of Brown Eyed Girl by Van Morrison. 

Okay that’s it, hope you enjoy, for real!

So you are Sam and Colby’s video editor and obv, you are in love with Colby. This is the first time you go explore with the bois (Sam, Colby and Corey) and a spirit might end up being your wingman. 

Word count: 2240

“ You win, you lose, there’s a chance you have to take becau-“

An abrupt break of the car gets you out of your daydream. You hold on tight out of reflex to the car door as you quickly take off your headphones in the verge of screaming. After two seconds that went by in slow motion you hear Sam and Colby laughing their asses off while the car takes up to normal speed again. You were sitting on the left back seat and turn your head to see Corey, eyes extremely wide open, and both hands hanging on for dear life to the car door. You look back to the shotgun, Sam, still laughing his ass off, and understand that you are in no danger and that it was all a joke to scare Corey, who was asleep.

Y/N: Jesus fuck guys!

COREY: You jerks you almost gave me a freaking heart attack I swear to God.

Y/N: Did you even record it?

 COLBY: You know what Y/N? Sometimes the best pranks are meant just for us.

You start to mock Colby as he talks, you do that when you can’t come up with a comeback – which doesn’t happen often-, or when you want to make Colby laugh – which is a constant mood in your life-.

SAM: I think we are close now

Close to where? You might ask. Well this story starts about three months ago, when, after a couple months of living in LA unemployed, you went to a job interview to become a video editor for an “online video creator”, in other words, a youtuber. The pay was enough for you to get by, and you would be doing what you love. The story got really interesting for you when you got to the interview and realized that, if you got the job, you would be editing for Sam and Colby, as well as their separate channels. Even though you were freaking out inside you nailed the interview and long story short, you got the job.

Little by little you started to get along more and more with the boys, not only Sam and Colby, but also with the whole gang. After a month and a half, you started appearing in some of their videos. It became a running joke for them to address you as their editor, asking you to put crazy effects in the video, or just talking shit about you. You decided to add to the videos reactions of you while editing. The fans started to love you and wanted more of you in the videos. Today was gonna be the second time you were officially in a video, the first time being a basic-ass YouTube video absolutely irrelevant for the narrative. Of course, people had started to ship you with Colby, which wasn’t unexpected, all you had to do was:

1.  Be a girl.

2.  Address/talk to Colby somehow in a video.

3.  Look at him during said video.

Fans would ship a seaweed with Colby, you weren’t surprised that happened. What fans did not know – and you didn’t want them to – is that you actually liked him. Really liked him. Cantstopstaringatyou kinda like him. Maybe loved him. He obviously didn’t know this either, he is technically your boss, and your job was more needed than romance. Besides, you were kind of confused since you usually never liked babyfaced-hairless-fuckboylooking guys like Colby

So there you were, accompanying the dynamic duo and Corey to explore an abandoned psychiatric hospital. You had asked to come since you love exploring, especially paranormal places, and they thought that you would bring more views since people really liked you. The hospital was an hour and a half away from Sam and Colby’s place, which was kind of a long ride, Colby was driving.

 Y/N: So Sam, tell us a little bit about this hospital, what is up with it.

SAM: Oh well, the usual, psychiatric haunted hospital were people hear things and feel people observing them and all that, nothing particularly new.

Y/N: Please don’t make it sound any more exciting or my cranium will explode. (you say sarcastically)

SAM: Well, its juts the same thing over and over. It’s just that something different happens in every place we go to.

Y/N: Okay so I think it’s time for you guys to tell me… how real are your videos? Do I have to like, pretend I see shit or…

 They all chuckle

COLBY: Well we exaggerate everything, specially Corey. Like… we hear any sound and we are all like “omG WhAT wAs tHat” you know?

SAM: It also depends on the video, I have faked things in the 3AM challenges ‘cause nothing would happen otherwise and the video would be useless. But we usually don’t fake things in the exploring ones.

Y/N: You know I could expose you right now with this info right?

 Sam laughs and then looks dead serious at you

SAM: I would have to kill you then

COREY: Queen Mary was real tho… (says while staring blankly out the window)

Y/N: I know…

Everyone turns to look at you, even Colby through the rearview mirror.

COREY: How can you know?

Y/N: I don’t know I… It feels real I guess.

The car stops, you look out the windshield and see nothing but trees.

Y/N: Is this it?

COLBY: Yes, it’s about half a mile through the forest.

Before going out to explore, Sam and Colby shoot the intro, giving Corey and you facts about the hospital.  

We get to the main wing without much difficulty, there was a hole in the fence so in case of having to run away from cops we would be fine.

COREY: Omg it’s so cold tonight

Y/N: Actually I thought it was gonna be colder. This sweatshirt is super warm. (You say referring to the XPLR hoodie that Colby let you borrow for the video)

COLBY: Looks really good on you.

Your brain just short circuits and it takes you a full couple seconds to react. You decide that the best thing to do is to make funny gestures as if you were posing for a photoshoot. Surprisingly, it makes Colby laugh. Everything was being recorded but you weren’t worried about it since it was you who was gonna be editing it HEH.

You explore the ground floor, where nothing paranormal really happens, although everything looks creepy as fuck. When you get to the second floor you feel as if the air is getting thicker.

SAM: You okay Y/N? (Says pointing the camera at you)

Y/N: Yeah its just… the air feels heavier here

 COREY: Yeah I feel it too

 Y/N: Maybe we should try and contact something here

 The guys look slightly surprised about what you just said.

 COLBY: Yeah let’s do it (says kind of excited). Do you wanna do the honors Y/N?

 Colby takes the spirit box out of his bag. Corey obviously acts as if he was against it. You sigh, a little scared, and take it. You turn it on – it’s not the first one you have ever used -. You take a deep breath.

 Y/N: Hello?

 The only sound in the whole hospital is the static of the box going through the radio channels, but you feel like you can hear everyone’s hearts beating.

No answer.

Y/N: If there is any entity here with us, please make yourself known.

[?]: Tell him…

Everyone jumps and screams, your eyes wide open, there are some swears from Colby, while Corey does the classical tuning-around-and-pretending-to-walk-away. You glance at Colby for a split second without even realizing, getting the feeling that the entity is talking about him. You make a gesture for everyone to shut up.

Y/N: Tell who?

 No answer. You all look at each other in confusion

 COLBY: Tell who?

[?]: You (says a female voice) tell her (in a male voice right after) ”the brown eyed girl” (right after landing in that part of the song, the radio goes back to static)

The entity is talking about you. Colby freezes. Sam gasps deeply, he knows Colby is in love with you, and can tell that you love him back. Can this be it?

Colby looks up, your eyes meet.

 COLBY: (Looking at you dead in the eyes) What do I tell her?

Your blood freezes. A sudden loud thud makes all of your head’s turn

 SAM: We need to go NOW.

 You all start running towards the exit, you were really far from it, after a little while, you all stop to check if anyone is following you. There is not a sound around.

 SAM: What do we do?

COLBY: It doesn’t seem like anyone else is in here.

COREY: So what the hell was that thud?

Y/N: Maybe it’s just a fucking thud for once you know? (You say irritated)

Corey looks back at you surprised and a little hurt by your answer.

Y/N: Sorry… I’m just a little freaked out.

COREY: It’s okay… me too. 

SAM: Should we keep on exploring? Should we go?

Y/N: Let’s keep exploring, if we hear another inexplicable sound we take off.

SAM: Okay sounds good

 You keep exploring for another while, nothing weird happens, just the usual painted walls with satanic symbols and dirty walls that make it seem as if there are shadows behind you.

You all exit the room you were in, with less hope to find something each time, and not really wanting to try the spirit box again. After almost a minute you realize Colby is not there.

Y/N: Where’s Colb-

A loud noise interrupts you as if something really heavy has fallen. The loud thud is followed by Colby’s screams. You start sprinting towards the source of the screams, the last room you had gone into. Everyone follows right behind you. When you enter the room you see a wardrobe over one of Colby’s legs. You run towards him.

Y/N: Don’t move Colby stay still! (you yell)

Colby looks at you with terror in his eyes, begging for help.

SAM: (Frozen) What happened?

Y/N: Sam help me lift it up! Corey you pull him out on my sign. (You say almost screaming)

You and Sam lift the wardrobe on three, its really heavy and when it seems like you are about to lift it enough for Colby’s foot to get unstuck, your arms give out a bit. To your surprise, the wardrobe does not fall back on Colby’s leg. Thanks to Sam you manage to lift it enough for Corey to drag Colby out, who instantly helps him up. Colby is almost crying. Both Sam and you let go of the wardrobe, making a huge thud as it hits the floor.

SAM: Let’s get the fuck out of here.

Both Corey and you put Colby’s arms around your neck and walk as fast as possible. You manage to get to the car in no time, with your hearts pounding, your lungs burning and your eyes watering.

SAM: I’m driving.

Corey helps you put Colby in the back seats.

COREY: You sit with him, I’ll go in the front.

You nod rapidly as you get in next to him. All the doors close within milliseconds appart as Sam starts the car and hits the gas.

You tear up a bit, waiting for your heart to stop racing. You wipe out your tears as they come out, trying to hide them.

COREY: We need to go to the hospital.

COLBY: I’m okay guys (with a shaky voice) It’s not broken.

SAM: You don’t know that!

COLBY: I’ve broken bones before and it is not fucking broken we are not going to the hospital.

SAM: What the hell happened?

COLBY: I don’t know... I just stayed behind cause I felt something in the room and next thing I know I am on the floor with a wardrobe crashing my leg.

A few seconds of silence go by until the guys notice you are upset, although you are not crying anymore.

COLBY: …Are you okay Y/N?

Y/N: ARE YOU STUPID WHY WOULD YOU WANDER OFF LIKE THAT? (voice shaking) YOU KNOW PERFECTLY WELL HOW DANGEROUS IT IS. (You start to tear up again) WHAT IF THE FLOOR GAVE OUT? DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA- I- (you stutter) FUCK’S SAKE.

 Colby takes your hand and caresses it softly trying to calm you down.

 COLBY: I’m sorry.

You wipe out the few tears and breathe deeply as you look away from him.

COLBY: Thank you Y/N, thank you guys… really. That was very scary.

Y/N: Thank Sam… if it hadn’t been for him the wardrobe would have fallen right back on your leg… My arms gave out on me.

SAM: What?

You look up at Sam, confused. He takes his eyes off of the road for a second to look at you. You demand an explanation with your eyes.

SAM: I… my arms gave out midway… I thought you lifted it…

Y/N: What? 

You all look at each other with your mouths half open, looking for an explanation from the others. No one says anything. 

COREY: We need to look back at the footage as soon as we get home.

You all nod in response.

After a deep sigh you look at Colby, he looks exhausted. You don’t really think it twice and you cuddle up next to him, holding onto his arm and laying your head on his shoulder. You feel his head resting on yours and you breathe deeply as the fear fades away.

#sam and colby #colby brock #sam golbach #corey scherer #jake webber #trap house #xplr #colbyxreader #colby imagine #colby fanfic #tfil #elton castee #overnight #paranormal

[rowankingsleyy]

Like this if you want to plot with Rowan (we know we’re not new but we could always use new connections) =)

NAME: ROWAN JESSAMINE KINGSLEY

NICKNAMES: Ro, Winnie (close friends only)

AGE: 28

PRONOUNS: She/Her

OCCUPATION: Published Author/Freelance Baker

HEIGHT: 5′1

BIRTHDAY: May 11th, 1992

ZODIAC SIGN: Taurus

PARENTS: Cassandra and Tony Kingsley

SIBLINGS: Rett Kahale (half sibling)

ALIGNMENT: Neutral Good

MBTI: ISFJ

MORE UNDER THE READ MORE =)

TW: domestic violence, sexual assault, anxiety, eating disorders, mention of death, illness, drugs

SEQUENCE OF EVENTS

Rowan was born to Cassandra and Tony Kingsley in the early summer of 1992, at which point things were already strained between the two-some because of Tony’s alcohol problem and Cassie’s generally meek personality.

Rowan’s half-brother took a leading role in her care from a very young age, not just because her dad was useless, but also because their mother was so distracted by her need to please Tony that she dropped the ball often.

Both her brother and her saw things they certainly shouldn’t have, were told things that no children should be told, and occasionally went without for no reason other than Tony liking control, but he never hurt them physically.  However, he did hurt their mother.  

Less than a year after her brother turned 18 and moved out of the house, their mother died of an aneurysm suddenly and unexpectedly.

Despite how Rowan’s father treated her mother, the loss of her broke him and send him on a 3 month bender that only ended because he was booked with vehicular manslaughter and his 3rd DWI.

Luckily, Rowan only spent a few weeks in foster care before the court allowed her brother to assume custody over her.

From the moment her brother joined, the club became her family.  The wives and daughters of the club were the people who taught her everything she knows about being a girl, doing make up, doing her hair, navigating boys.  (This is probably why she went through a blue eyeshadow phase at 17)

Rowan is a textbook overachiever and perfectionist, she always had all As, was always in 6 clubs, and held officer positions in every single one including the dance team.  While she did hold officer positions, she never really was one to take front and center--she prefers the positions of the people behind the scenes keeping things together.  (secretary, treasurer, anything that has to do with organizational skills.

While over her high school years she wrote a lot, and even published one of her short stories in a local newspaper, she didn’t write her first full novel until she went away to college at 18.  No one ever read that novel, it hit the trash during its 5th round of editing. 

At 18 she received a full scholarship to UC Berkley and left Charming for the first time to go to school first time.  She lived in the dorms all 4.5 years and graduated with a degree in English, minoring in Psychology.

If you ever ask Rowan what she’s afraid of, she’ll tell you losing control again.  She notes two prominent times of completely losing control over her life, one fairly recent, and the other while she was away at college.  While she was away, she went out fairly often with her friends and one night someone slipped something into her drink.  Nothing happened, she made it home without incident, but the way it made her feel, the way she felt victimized or the potential of being so set her off.  She had two drop three of her classes and extend her time in college an extra semester because of how hard she spun out, trying to control things that she wouldn’t typically even think about.  She started her senior year 20 pounds lighter with 0% of the friends she had started her Junior year with.

While she was away at college her brother became a father, which meant frequent trips home to visit and help out with her niece who quickly meant enough to her to be her own.    

She returned home from school at 23 and worked in a bakery until she could live off of her cookie business (at 25 her cookie business was self sufficient).  

While she was growing her cookie business, she began writing her first professional novel and completed it at 26.  She sold it that very same year, and published it at 27.

While it changed her life or the better and got her foot in the door with the publishing world, publishing her book also led to the the single most traumatizing thing she has ever experienced.  

While she was marketing her book, the marketing manager became very demanding of Rowan and her time, which often led to them being together very late at night.  One night, while out of town for a book reading, he pushed himself on Rowan.  This assault led to the second occurance of Rowan losing complete control and her life suffering because of it.

After the assault, Rowan threatened to blow the whistle, and in return he threatened her career so she is still with that publishing company with him as her marketing manager.  

As of now, Rowan is in the process of getting her second book published, filling in as mom as best she can for her niece, running her cookie business and holding cookie classes, and trying to make amends for the bonds she broke when she spun out last.

TENDENCIES

Because of how contentious Rowan’s early childhood was, she has a pretty anxious mind that is always running on 100.  Her thoughts come a mile a minute and they can be pretty difficult to stop.  Melatonin is her best friend.  

When she loses control over things in her life (hELLO we meet again control-less childhood) she controls everything she can, and that manifests differently every time.  Controlling what she eats to the point of malnourishment, controlling every single word of what she’s writing, putting herself on lockdown until whatever she’s working on is      p e r f e c t.  

She fixates on her mistakes, in high school if she answered to the wrong name during roll she would be thinking about it for the rest of the day.

She bakes in excess when she’s trying to think through something, the measurements and muscle memory movements help calm her brain into being able to process whatever is on her mind.

She’s always been a writer, from the very first time she had to write in her 4th grade ELA class.  That only grew through Middle and High School creative writing classes.  She’s always loved exploring the stories and that it was something that she could perfect through six or seven round of editing.

Sticky notes cover her bedroom walls because of how quickly her thoughts come and go, her ideas for books do NOT come in order and she can often be found starring at her walls with her little scribbles trying to figure out what order they should go in.

For someone who would be considered the ‘bright & shiny’ type, she has a thing for researching and watching shows about serial killers.  She can rattle off facts like its her day job.  

Because of how quiet she can be, sometimes folks assume she’s innocent or that she doesn’t know anything, but in reality the opposite is true.  She’s spent so much time watching and analyzing everyone and everything that she knows much more that she lets on or that any civilian should.

She learned how to play guitar in college (not very well) and is a pretty damn good singer, but she’d never be the type to want to be front and center in front of a crowd.  She mostly uses these talents as a means to an end in writing mini stories with lyrics.  It appeases her in the in between period of having finished a book and being able to start a new one.

All floral, all the time.  Enough said.

GENUINELY afraid of birds and giant frogs

I’ll probably add to this it’s 1am and I’m tired.

WANTED CONNECTIONS

high school friends/enemies

someone who delivers cookies for her

women who influenced her growing up within the club

club members who are like family

someone who mentored her in her baking

friends she lost when she spun out during college

literally anything

ESTABLISHED CONNECTIONS

wherever i go, you bring me home Rett Kahale// her brother.  her parent.  rowan is extremely close to her brother, as kids they were all each other had.  he’s done everything he could to give her a normal childhood, to make up for her parents’ lapses.  she would do just about anything for him or his daughter.  

can't stop staring, at those oceans eyes, burning cities, and napalm skies. fifteen flares inside those ocean eyes Lev Finnerty// no title.  but he’s the only man who has ever quieted her brain long enough for her to both lose her breath and catch it.  they’ve kissed a few times and have something comparable to a magnetic field between them, but lev broke it off out of respect for her brother.

i'll stand up with you forever, i'll be there for you through it all Natalie Cassadaga// her sister.  they may not have grown up together, but because of how her brother took Nat in the very same way he did her they bonded to an extent that would have been unfathomable had she not experienced it.  barring childhood, they’re sisters, no buts.

i’m a mess, i’m a loser, i’m a hater, i’m a user Freddie Dawson// her confidant.  this is the only person outside of nat who gets to see rowan admit to being a mess.  freddie gets the 100% honest version of rowan, usually with a little bit of liquid courage.

you can leave me in the dark if that's all I get from you Maximo Sanchez // her ex.  they dated in secret for 8 months before her assault.  when she spun out after the assault, she didn’t tell him and she pushed him away.  she fucked up the relationship, but she’s a little bitter about how easily he gave up on her.  

you're ripped at every edge but you're a masterpiece Angela Hunter // the best friend.  an unlikely pair given their age difference.  regardless of the time that’s passed since angie left, they picked right back up like no time had lapsed. they did so without judgement or awkward pauses.  they eat, they drink, they gossip.  they support each other when needed.  rowan is considered an aunt to Lily.  lots of cookies and weed cupcakes to be had.

'cause they’re gonna tell you all the rules to break, to take away that light Leyla Aslan // her roommate.  the boldness to rowan’s softness.  how different they are makes them work, they bring balance to each other (and rationalize the one another when they go too far).  

If you’ve made it this far, you deserve a baby Rowan picture, here.

#this got insanely long wtf #about #the fucked up part is ill probably add more later #two month late intro yay me #charming.intro #{pretend I'm a shelter for your heartaches that don't have a home}

[jmgiovine]

I am Jack’s Review

SPOILER-review FOR THE FILM FIGHT CLUB (1999)

                                                                                      by: J.M. Giovine

There is beauty underneath the chaotic mayhem fest that David Fincher’s infamous 1999 adaptation of Chuck Palahniuk’s equally infamous book from 1996. At this point in his career, Fincher managed to achieve a well-deserved recognition towards his name, thanks to his immortally disturbing noir-90s jewel Se7en (1995) and The Game (1997) starring Michael Douglass in one of his highly acknowledged main roles. But what about a film that, on first screenings, was bashed out of the general positive opinions from audiences and critics that were baffled as well as disturbed by the amount of self-awareness and lighthearted take on extreme and visceral violence? Why did it manage to become one of this era pieces of reference and fascination? I admit, I never saw this until summer 2011 after a massive Blockbuster rent, taking advantage of a special Thursday’s sale I already became familiar with. By that time, I started an already educational process of watching classic films, as well as considerably well-reviewed flicks from the last 30 years, and of course, Fight Club resided on those lists. 

Of course, I never imagined my shock, excitement and, of course, surprise, at that specific watch. What did I have in my humble-still-neophyte hands? Several key-moments inside the 2 hours 19 minutes feature served as grappling hooks, but it was the final shot on the film... the finale presenting the Narrator and Marla, together, in a panoramic-perfectly symmetric frame bathed in dark-blue color pallets, with the crescendo guitar and lyrics of Pixies that made me realize... I just saw, officially, my new and definitive favorite movie, of all times. 

How I dared to pick a partially recent film (back in the day) as my epitome of filmmaking? The cornerstone of my affection for storytelling, the birth of the true nest of visuals, the reaching-point of directing and, well points given, the professorship of how to act a damn movie, for all that matters. Edward Norton is a downright perfect personification of the defeated conformist, who is subdued to the pleasures of an empty-consumer’s life in order to fulfill and existential vacuum, from a life that desperately wishes for more... a true revelation. Is funny how the film’s title customizes the story true intentions; a character micro-study throughout the elements in his life that’ll lead him onto an existential-madness, and the odyssey in his path to self-freedom.  

Because there’s much more in Fight Club than just, well, fights. There’s also, more than a message hidden in every single dialogue provided by Narrator, evolving until eventually turning into a constant emotional reminder of self-emotional dilemmas in every ‘Jack’s Something’, and considering the plenty of theories and interpretations about this particular script-element (Jack as another pseudonym of God is perhaps the most accurate and personal favorite), every character in the film serves a purpose, rather than being there. Example of this is, perhaps, the most important character in the whole film, and no, I’m not talking about Pitt’s sanctified Tyler Durden, no, I’m talking about Helena Bonham Carter’s Marla Singer. 

But why is she so important? Well, there’s the notorious plot-aspect that she basically quick-started Narrator into becoming (fully) Tyler. Noticed the several flashes in between frames of Tyler manifesting constantly in between important scenarios that are defining the Narrator’s demise and condition around his insomnia, and we’re understanding (after reaching the film’s memorable twist) that Tyler wasn’t fully presented as another character until Marla started “ruining everything”, as Narrator well stated the first time we’re introduced to her. It’s funny because people often believe ‘insomnia’ was what triggered Narrator’s alter ego, leading up to the real plot of the film, but this is part of what the magic behind Fight Club resides. Jim Uhls mastered the structure in which the film would be build, offering the essential elements and aspects from the novel, but adapted in benefit of movie format, also, to please Fincher’s aesthetics and development between characters. While Palahniuk’s take on his story is essentially similar to what Fincher accomplished in the film, the differences are notorious, one could even argue “more than needed”, in order to reach the final product we all enjoy and love, but here’s  the thing; adaptations shouldn’t be about maintain a copy-paste-like attachment to the original source material... which is considerably impossible for movie purposes. No. It’s all about transition. What works in the novel. What works in the potential script. What to leave just the way it is narrated, what to improve, or modify, or (apparent writers taboo) to ‘change’. 

But what about the film’s true ‘meaning’? Is not so complicated once digested, but it never hurts to explore it deeply. If you ever grabbed a single Nietzsche, Schopenhauer or Camus book, you’ll understand (in a way) what you’re getting into. Like mentioned above, an existential-madness, and the odyssey in his path to self-freedom. All in all, this could be the accurate take on the film’s story. Fincher is a master at exposing a story gradually until, eventually, the truth comes up, grabbing our backs not with fingernails, but claws. I’m still mesmerized, 8 years after seen this for the first time, how quotable the film is, considering Palahniuk’s book does have a similar quality, but never onto this degree; Uhls managed not just to comprehend the novel’s traits, but he basically embraced them and made them his own, worthy of Fincher’s direction. Every line in his script is memorable, every dialogue and conversation can be quotable and acknowledged, perhaps with not definite importance to advance the story, but these scenes feels as important as if they were heavily essential plot-points in order to reach the bigger heights. 

And, then, we have the lungs of the film; the true engine that makes this work above what it already was. Tyler Durden, performed by a ridiculously shaped Brad Pitt from the 90s. Tyler is the antithesis of what the Narrator represents. If we have to give Jack an identity, it’ll be Tyler, although the best representation of the reference is God, we’re talking about the complete opposite of God. As Tyler states: “ Fuck damnation, man! Fuck redemption! We are God's unwanted children? So be it! “, declaring war to the conception mankind has about God. Interpreting the shit out of it, maybe Tyler is the definitive XXth Century representation of Lucifer, but more in the way Milton conceived him; as a tragic-yet-freedom figure. Tyler frees Narrator by turning him into what He is, in all expressions of the word. Pitt really has a blast of a time interpreting the film’s anti-hero, and it is HIS performance what engages us into loving the film. We want to be Tyler, we need to become HIM, we need to follow his ideals, as radical as they grow, and we’re okay with it, because deep down inside, we know he’s right, we know he’s the TRUTH. As he declares once he’s revealed as the Narrator’s alter ego: “ All the ways you wish you could be, that's me. I look like you wanna look, I fuck like you wanna fuck, I am smart, capable, and most importantly, I am free in all the ways that you are not. “ We know that’s the assumption we’ll adopt if we were on the same situation, and perhaps unintentionally or purposely, but the film taught us this eventually will happen if we continue this meaningless path of self-improvement. In my book, that kind of character is a complete achievement.

If we come to compare the movie with the book, the difference its quite clear, although, like I aforementioned, a movie adaptation of anything should never be a direct attempt of a copy, that’s useless, pointless and downright impossible; while we can manage to preserve elements from the source material, there has to be changed made in order to accommodate formats and the media used, in this case, the novel-structure, narrative and progression will never mix with the whole production of a full-length feature film, even with movies 3 hours long such as, let’s say, The Lord of the Rings Extended Editions, there were still changes made and story elements that were left out. In the case of Fincher, he’s the perfect example of someone meant to preserve only the useful and adequate book-elements in each one of his films, since most of them have been film adaptations of books. Notice his structure and neat direction in films such as The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (2008) a short-novel originally written by F. Scott Fitzgerald, or The Social Network (2010), a book simply conceived as the chronicle of the birth of the most famous and relevant social media in the world. Notice the tendency of Fincher to own those properties, such as he did with the novel Gone Girl adapted in 2014 from author Gillian Flynn. Fincher has the ability to understand his source material, embrace the spirit within, and provide his own unique vision and talented direction to offer a new identity. Again, Fight Club is no exception, hell, it probably was the first time it happened inside Fincher’s filmography. 

However, and in spite of the film’s iconic title as modern-classic (this due to the DVD’s mouth to mouth spread), we should never remove the merits from the actual novel. Palahniuk’s prose and style are unique, and so are his stories, specially his magnum opus-debut from 96′, and while the film manages to truly be its own thing, the novel pretty much deserves the fame it has gathered throughout the years, specially since the third part in comic-book mini-series format is about to arrive. For the fans of the film, I highly recommend the novel and its sequel. For the really hardcore Tyler-space monkeys-fans, such as myself, I strongly recommend checking out the rest of Palahniuk’s work. Back in the day that was my personal Tyler-homework, and thanks to my devotion for this film I managed to know one of my favorite writers, along the complete filmography of Fincher. Yeah, it pretty much deviates from Tyler’s philosophy against possessions and material attachments (since I own the books and films), but hey! If it weren’t for the media, I wouldn’t have met this story.

I think, in the end, I could finish praising the film even more. There’s not much of a point in doing so, since almost everyone who had claim to be a film-goer have seen it. The best part of this movie is the pre-judgement; when you pop the disc into the console and start the ride without actually being aware of the twist and the general story line following the second and third act. Whether it is for its dark-comedic direction, the near-perfect script-adaptation value, the hilariously magnetic and hypnotizing performances by every single member of the cast, or its composition, it’s perfect editing, the mesmerizing color pallet, stylish soundtrack, beautiful camerawork... Fight Club is a mix, a mix between chaos, battery acid, adrenaline, blood and dirt inside a smart and fun container. It’s almost impossible not to fell for it, just as our Narrator and pretty much the entire fucking world fell for our Tyler’s ideals of destruction and self-liberation. In the end, we are all Tyler’s Space Monkeys, and we are Jack’s trapped audience members...

#movies #film #review #davidfincher #bradpitt #edwardnorton #fightclub #chuck palahniuk

[athena-athena]

I’ll Never Leave, I’ll Always Stay (Yondu Story)

A/N So this story came out of nowhere last night, and it ended up being really hard to write.  The words flowed easily enough, but it was very emotional for me.  As someone who deals with anxiety attacks, writing this hit a little close to home, and I ended up crying through the last 1/3 of the story.  That being said, I didn’t do any editing (apart from looking for typos, though I may have missed some), so what you see is what came out last night, grammatical errors and all.  

The title came from one of my favorite songs, Tree to Grow, by The Lone Bellow, but the story itself was heavily influenced by another of my favorite songs by the same band, Take My Love.  On first listen, it doesn’t really sound like it would fit the story, but I’ve always found the song really emotional, and the moment right as it builds up and breaks into the last chorus always slays me.  Some of the lyrics are pretty fitting, too, and I listened to the song on repeat the entire time I was writing this.  I highly recommend the song, or any song by The Lone Bellow, actually; they’re fantastic.  

But, anyway, back to the story.  I hope y’all like it!  And to make up for putting Yondu through this tonight, I have a fluffy piece that I’m going to post later this week.  :)  

Tagged:  @animeaniseed @misfitgirlwrites

Warnings:  Anxiety attack; flashbacks to when he was a Kree battle slave

One minute everything was fine, and the next, Yondu could feel the familiar warning signs of an impending anxiety attack.  He had been standing in the hall, discussing the next mission with Kraglin, when he heard it – the metallic clinking of chains.  It was only Tullk walking past carrying a box of odds and ends, which just happened to contain a chain that was hanging out of the box, but that didn’t stop the sudden, overwhelming fear.  He broke out in a sweat.  He knew he had precious few moments before he would break down and the horrible memories would flood in, and he refused to show that weakness to the crew.  

He cut Kraglin off mid-sentence, “Fergot somethin’ I gotta do,” and walked off before Kraglin could respond.

“Aye, Cap’n,” Kraglin called after him, before turning and walking off in the opposite direction.

Yondu didn’t have time to worry about what Kraglin would think.  He hurried around a corner and found a storage room.  Slamming the door, he staggered to the middle of the room, just as the flashbacks hit him.  Pieces of memories flashed across his mind’s eye – rattling chains attached to his wrists, ankles, and neck; the quick whistle of a whip above his head, then the sharp sting as it hit his bare back, again and again.  He fell to his knees and cradled his head in his hands as he rocked back and forth, the memories still assaulting him.  He could smell the cramped cell he was kept locked in, could feel the cold floor beneath him.  

He was there. No.  No, he was on the Eclector.  But the memories felt so real, and he was losing his grip on reality.  He started to shake as the memories became clearer and his surroundings became hazier.  Gasping for breath, he gave in as the terrible memories crashed over him.

“Yondu!  Yondu!”

Vaguely, he heard someone calling his name, as if through a fog, as though from miles away.

“Yondu, are you okay?”

He felt a soft touch on his hand. This couldn’t be part of his nightmares.  There was no softness in those dark places.

Slowly, his surroundings started to come back to him.  It was still hazy, still gray, but he could make out the storage room.  Not in a cell. His breath was still ragged, and he was still besieged by nausea, but he became aware of someone holding his trembling hand.

“Yondu, what happened?”

Y/N.  He saw her sitting on the floor next to him.  

He shook his head slightly, but the resulting wave of dizziness had him regretting it at once.  

“I’m… I’m fine.”

“No, you’re not,” Y/N replied, her voice laced with concern.

He hated that she had to see him like this:  weak, pathetic, useless.  She should get up and walk away, leave him alone with his demons.  He didn’t deserve her kindness.  He deserved to be alone.  She was better off without him. He tried to remove his hand from her gentle grasp, but she tightened her grip.

As though she could read his mind, she told him, “I’m not leaving you.  I’m never leaving you, Yondu.  Whatever you’re going through, I’m staying.  I’ll always stay.”

She wrapped her other arm around his shoulder and gathered him to her, as he began to weep.  She gently rubbed his back as he took great shuddering breaths and let the tears flow freely.  She whispered reassurances as he fought back the darkness.  For once, he didn’t have to weather the storm on his own.  She was his anchor, and though he was still seeing and feeling the past, he could feel her warm presence beside him, as well.  He could feel her calling him back to the light, away from the nightmares – from the pain, the despair, the cold chains.  Her warmth was reassuring, and he could still hear her whispering, “It’s okay.  You’re okay.  I’m here.”  

Finally, the attack loosened its grip on him, and he felt the tightness in his chest ease.  Y/N was still gently rubbing his back as he rested his head on her chest. She seemed to notice the change in his breathing, from gasping to only slightly shaky.  In a quiet voice, she asked, “Is the worst over?”

He sat up and pressed the heels of his hands into his eyes, and, in a scratchy voice, said, “Yeah, think so.”  He felt her stop rubbing his back and felt a sudden pang of grief that she would be leaving him now.  She was probably ashamed of his breakdown, was probably already planning to leave the ship and go back home.  He felt the blackness creeping back with those thoughts, but then he felt her warm hand on his face, gently caressing his cheek with her thumb.  He opened his eyes and found her smiling softly at him.  

“You don’t have to be alone anymore, Yondu.”

He still felt the numbness that followed an attack, but this time there was something else too, something small, but he clung to it as a man lost at sea clings to a piece of driftwood.

Leaning forward, he enveloped her in his arms, and whispered, “Thank you.”

In answer, she returned his embrace, and he knew she hadn’t been lying.  She wouldn’t leave him alone.  

#yondu #yondu x reader #guardians of the galaxy #yondu udonta #gotg #my writing

[ofthemuses]

Massive Blue October Sentence Meme

Part 2/3 ( one, three)

 Feel free to edit pronouns and stuff. I may have changed a little to make the lyrics more conversational. Blue October is amazing and deserves more love! Triggers for self-harm and suicide! Also some sexual stuff.

Foiled (2006)

Once so hard to speak, now so easy to play around

I was hypnotized

You make me smile

And could you be the one that's not afraid to look me in the eye?

Hey, we can hide the bodies on the ride home 

I'll be reaching for the stars with you

Who cares if no one else believes

I'm your ride home

Cause we're going home

Yeah we won

I'm just a normal boy

Wish I was much more masculine

I'm cold as cold as cold can be

I wanna swim away but don't know how

Sometimes it feels just like I'm falling in the ocean

Let the rain of what I feel right now come down

I'm reaching for the life within me

How can one man stop his ending

I calculate what I had done

My will to quickly end it all set front row in my need to fall

Into the ocean, end it all

I would meet you

Would you meet me?

I'm glad to say that we've met, but I'm sad to say that the circumstances weren't on our side

It's like a last chance for a first dance

I have to block out thoughts of you so I don't lose my head

Playing movies in my head that make a porno feel like home

There's a burning in my pride, a nervous bleeding in my brain

An ounce of peace is all I want for you. Will you never call again?

And will you never say that you loved me, just to put it in my face?

And will you never try to reach me?

Hate me today. Hate me tomorrow

Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you

Hate me in ways... Yeah, ways hard to swallow

Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you

I'm sober now for three whole months it's one accomplishment that you helped me with

The one thing that always tore us apart is the one thing I won't touch again

In my sick way I want to thank you for holding my head up late at night

While I was busy waging wars on myself, you were trying to stop the fight

You never doubted my warped opinions on things like suicidal hate

You made me compliment myself when it was way too hard to take

So I'll drive so fucking far away that I never cross your mind and do whatever it takes in your heart to leave me behind

Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I had made

And like a baby boy I never was a man

Make it go away!

Just make a smile come back and shine just like it used to be

How can you do this to me?

Why do I feel this way?

How could I let it go?

How could I let her go?

Would you like to take a walk with me

My mind, it kind of goes fast. I try to slow it down for you

I want to give you something I've been wanting to give to you for years. My heart

My heart, my pain won't cover up

You left me

I came to see the light in my best friend

You seemed as happy as you'd ever been

My chance of being open was broken

And now you're Mrs. him.

And I can't change this

I can never take it back

But now I can't change your mind

Make it go away. Please.

I walk as far as they need to recover

I want to carry a piece of who I was before So when I hit the wall, I really hit the wall

I owned up, I've grown up, do you remember me?

I showed up and so what if I'm the used to be

But I'm happy that you're happy

This is no longer about me

I been a drunk disrespectful little street punk

There's a self-destructive meaning in the bleeding of a guy

Making sense of all mistakes and my stupidity

And when you're sick you seem to think you've failed eternally

I'm really sick of saying sorry but I will

I want to learn to walk with others as an equal

I want to treat the ones who love me with respect

I want to kiss a girl and know I'll never lie again

Still you try to control it

Could you imagine the phobia?

Your brain is faulty wiring

I'm sick of shaking, never waking from the hell I achieve

I never knew you till you left me with the crying disease

Yeah your memory that punches me has broken the bone

I'm admitting I'm wrong

And now you're pulling out the best of me

Its proof to show that I bleed for this and I'd cut myself the shame to get to know this masochist who has stolen my first name

I never knew a heart could live inside the rust from all your rain

I didn't think to bring a wash cloth and rub away the dirt

Myself and I we share this barely beating heart of hurt

I want to show you just how fascinating kissing is

I may be some sort of crazy

We may be some sort of crazy

I swear on everything I have and more

I am toasting to the way you put that smile upon my face

Please take the message that I'm picking up my chin at last

I said my confidence, It gets stronger when you're next to me

I might crumble, I might take a fall again

Still missing you

But you're my everlasting friend

Please take the message that you taught me how to live at last

Will you be coming home?

I just want to know that you'll be coming

Is this happening?

I can't believe this is happening to me

I'm so yours for the taking

These words to say and then you kissed me...

Approaching Normal (2009)

It's gone wrong again. Gone fucking wrong.

Well liars they leave a guilty trail.

I've been lying for fucking years.

Now you've seen what I've done

How did I get here?

Just fucking thump his head and he'll turn back to normal.

Now why is that what I see?

Don't bother trusting me

Don't bother waiting

Don't bother changing things that won't give into changing

Just let me go away

It's all about making the best out of everything

You'll know when you're fine

You get back up and you're doing fine

But I don't have the time for your distorted esteem

Why are you toying with my mind?

I don't wanna hear you say it

Now you're messing with my pride

You think you're smarter than me

Well everyone knows you will never be smarter than me

Well I confess, you were too much stress

Well, I'm sick of standing in your line

I will never let you fuck me over

Stop talking down to me your war is old

Your game is over

Something we don't talk about

I'm like a ghost

What a fucking sad way to go

Your mother raised you as a joke

You think you own me. You should have known me

You took the future and the food off my family's plate

You think you'll use me. I'm stronger than you

You take my money, but it's useless when you see what I do to you

Look what I do to you

I really think that this is fun for the money

I'll make it comfy for the time wasted making you rich

finally you're mine

I dreamt you seduced me just to walk away

I dreamt you inspired then rewired what I say

But then I woke up feeling nauseous

how long have I been down?

I dreamt you called me beautiful then asked to hear me sing

Why can't we work when we both try?

I meant to sympathize I meant to be a friend

I know apologizing wont erase the end

But I learned that moving on, is where I must begin

Because when our colors mixed we couldn't fix the way they wouldn't blend

And I wish that only greatness follow you around

I hope to God, you find a way to keep from down

Please try to understand, yeah to understand me

Will you think of me, in time?

It's never my luck, So never mind.

I had a dream that you were with me

it wasn't my fault

I've never been here before

And yeah I've lost a lot of what I never expect to ever return

I can try to be with you, but some how I'll end up just losing a friend

I'm losing my friend...

Where did she go?

Will you let me into your heaven?

Stop staring, you're the reason I feel so unhappy all the time

Look I'm sorry if you feel like I let you down

Can you tell me what have I done so wrong to you

Tell me what am I supposed to do

I should be loved by you, that I know is true

I can't breathe when you're around!

You're too scared, scared of all of it

I get that feeling I'm talking to the wall

Can you hear me at all? 

I got a feeling you're falling out of love with me

Tell me who am I supposed to be?

Here it is the day, I have to go

Here it is the day I have to go

I can't let this show, how sick I feel to leave you so alone

God, I'm terrified

The dust has blinded you, the dust has blinded me

Because we have to live

Tell me you've used all precautions known

Cause if I believe in you, will you believe in me

Keep hanging on

Start healing

I really need to talk with you

I don't feel perfect at all. Sad and insecure and flawed

I find it hard to hold conversations

I'm wondering will it ever go away...just go away

Sometimes I feel like weeping, Awake and when I'm sleeping

How long will I be picking up pieces?

It feels like my heart is made of pure steel. It's just so heavy all the time

Yeah I'm scared of death and I'm scared of living

I gave up on the past cause it's unforgiving

Be strong ! Don't give up hope

You have to hold your head up high and watch all the negative go by

Don't you ever be ashamed to cry! You go ahead!

I want to tell you that everything will be okay

Don't lose yourself or your hope

I'm asking help me

Time to shake these memories

It's time to leave the past in the past

How far will I go to make it feel right?

Come home

I have to fix this on my own

Replace my heart, cause I'm convinced mine broke the day I let us end

I don't wanna live by coping, I'm done with hoping.....

Any Man In America (2011)

Do you feel it fall or do you feel at all? I can.

I can't be anything but who I am

I wish you'd stay

No I would never have let go

You used to make me feel at home, you made me feel at home, you made me feel again

And you would say I wish you'd stay and I'd never go

So take this heart of mine. You've taken it a hundred thousand times

I wish you'd have stayed

You want a separation

I tried everything, I work so hard for you

I put my heart in a dream

You never learned one thing, no, you never believed in me...

I missed the tour where you told me not to come home again

You bury your intentions like motherfucking nuclear bomb

You promised change and I believed. I walked right back into the same .

So if you're gonna leave me ‒ go away

Just remember I've told you it's what I'm all about

Maybe we should run away

Maybe we should disappear

Through understanding, I tried forgiveness,

I faced the past, it's what I witnessed

Why do I only feel the chills when I'm with you?

Why does a heart always have to break

Now there will be nothing to talk about,

I only note the truth is spoken best when brutally so honestly.

You had meaning to me

I was losing custody

I never even saw that shit.

I should have hid that shit 

It took twenty years of working just to earn that shit

Like you don't know.

You act like you believe it. That you're in control.

They don't think about you

No, they don't care about you.

And I tried to focus all my anger in my work instead.

But inside my soul is dead.

Literally they took her from me.

Fuck the judge. Fuck that county. Fuck your family too.

I'm way too strong

I work my ass off all day long.

I hate you, hate you, god.

You won't understand, probably never will.

Did he really get to take you home?

I'm surprised that you chose him.

I'm not surprised I never saw you around.

So who does this separation work for?

It's not about the feelings that we shared before.

Gah, no more.

What did you want me for?

You'll be sorrier when I'm gone.

Look I give you credit for pathetically thinking that you could make this up.

I should have seen the end was coming sooner than I ever did.

I found things that I didn't wanna know were there

I don't wanna give you my heart

No one's ever told you "no"

Can't expect you to know how to love when it was somethin' you were never taught

Just be good to yourself and love goes unspoken

I'm gonna keep it up

But nothing helped at all

And you're not listening to what I say

Communication has not made its way to your agenda for today

We're gonna have some problems, though

Leave that shit at your door

You don't get the point

You can't have me tonight, tomorrow night, the next day

You're not my fucking problem

I'm gonna win this conversation

Yeah, I truly believe you fucking ruined us all

Don't be concerned, that's just the power of a breaking heart... How good am I hiding it?

How good am I hiding it?

Look, I've got some bad intentions. Guilty as fucking charged.

I know that God exists. I held her in my arms.

I never knew I was able to ever feel this strong.

Take me off your worry list, it'll be better that way.

I might've been gone but I never walked out.

what kind of man would take the trust you break... and still follow through.

I'm just sick of calling your bluff.

I'm trying hard to change the things I always screw up.

But I've got to make the best of it.

There's something wrong here... Nobody's at home.

This is what your story's about.

My pretty little girl, can you figure it out?

Just listen to the stories. Not everything is glorious.

I fought the world and I lost that bout

And you are what my album's about.

Pride. It leaves you hollow

You know you should accept it

You're everything I ever want to be

Yeah that's what I do

Yeah I follow through 

We never found the line between the real and pretend

We have to... follow through

That's what's best for us all

Let me help you live on 

#sentence memes #sentence meme #lyrics meme #askbox meme #inbox meme

[thesinglesjukebox]

LIZZO FT. MISSY ELLIOTT - TEMPO

[6.75]

I suppose this would be an Allegretto...

Alex Clifton: This is a dream combination -- not sure how these two hadn't worked together before. I now judge high-energy songs on whether or not they'd be good to run to (weird metric but it's been working so far) and the beat on "Tempo" is a winner -- easy to keep pace to, easy to dance to, easy to get stuck in your head. I'm also delighted that we have a song with the lyric "thick thighs save lives." I'm not as in love with this as I was with "Juice," but Lizzo continues to sound good as hell. [7]

Stephen Eisermann: At this point, I'm starting to wonder if Lizzo will ever release an objectively bad song; her track record is pretty flawless. I first heard "Tempo" in the car while dancing at my sister's wedding reception this past weekend. My sister has always been curvier, and it was a big concern for her on her wedding day, but she seemed as confident as I'd ever seen her Saturday -- that is, until this song came on. Gone was the quiet confidence of my sister dancing politely to "Suavemente," "El Sinaloense" and "La Negra Tiene Tumbao" and instead out came a whole new Liz, one who was twerking in the center of her dance floor while all of my Mexican Catholic family watched, shook, wondering what happened to the self-conscious girl of before. But that's what Lizzo does, constantly. She takes a hot beat and empowers you, either with some feel-good rap or, as is the case here, some good provocation. Even if Missy's verse feels incomplete, it doesn't matter, because Lizzo came to play and it's hard to hate on confidence that sounds, feels, and looks this good. [8]

Katherine St Asaph: I don't dance, and any confidence boost the lyrics might provide slams fatally against the fact that the external world views my body as a collection of misshapen, unsightly, useless parts, an awareness I can't just turn off. (Which is the case for every song like this.) This song isn't for me. It doesn't help that the "When Doves Cry" guitar squall and Missy's verse, where she turns into Chingy, completely overpower Lizzo's subdued verses, which isn't supposed to happen at all. [3]

David Moore: The way Missy Elliott finds a little flicker of an idea and kindles it into a blaze of inspired silliness is always a thrill, but here it serves the counter-productive purpose of revealing the weakness of the rest of the track -- Lizzo's enthusiasm and ebullience can't hold a candle to Missy's lark. [6]

Alfred Soto: It's not twenty seconds old before "Tempo" blasts us with a distorted funk riff and the too long gone Missy Elliott. Nothing's changed -- "twerk skills are legendary" you knew. The chorus flickers, disappears. Chorus? Who needs one when Lizzo and Missy compete for sound effect attention? [7]

Tobi Tella: This collaboration feels epic in the same way Christina Aguilera and Demi did, a symbolic torch passing from old-school to new-school from two similar artists. Lizzo has Missy's classic swagger and flair, and the fact that she hasn't lost any of her uniqueness as she becomes more and more mainstream is truly something to be commended. This bangs as hard as anything she's ever released, and hopefully it becomes our generation's body positivity anthem over some more questionable songs... [8]

Katie Gill: I am always here for a bonafide ass shaking song, especially when it starts off with such an amazingly fun guitar riff like this one. The song is a beautiful cacophony and plays with sound in such a fun way, shifting from that minimalist beat to air horns & sirens, only to almost IMMEDIATELY drop back to the beat. And it's clear that Missy is having a blast, making the most out of every 'r' she gets to roll. This song is pure unadulterated fun, an ass shaking song that knows exactly what it is and spends the right amount of time crafting everything to near perfection. [8]

Iris Xie: Never thought I'd be so happy to hear "Truffle Butter" again, but I like "Tempo" and its version of that pinging synth more. "Tempo" takes that initial synth and layers it underneath with a heavy bass and a stop-start militaristic rhythm that makes the atmosphere simultaneously warm and domineering, and Lizzo's command is ice cold, casual, and driven. She's absolutely done with anyone telling her she can't command the dance floor, and whoops, she now is! The verse that starts with "pitty-pat" and ends with "cat" winds up your dance moves and is pretty much twerk material. But Missy, that sweet deliverer of unflinching vision, sonically grabs the theme of the song and busts out all the 'rrrs~'. But then she becomes very rude in the best way, and creates her own equivalent of a feature stage at 2:05 by changing it to a melted stadium band that sounds like the equivalent of lightning charging, with a brief drum clatter solo that sits with you long after it comes back to Lizzo dictating you to fuck it up to the tempo. But most importantly? The entire sentiment of the song is for any big girls (and anyone who identifies with those sentiments) who have ever felt really bad about moving on the dance floor -- it was never your problem, it was always the boring-ass "slow songs." And if that's really not one of the best ways I've ever heard about taking up space in clubs that can be hostile to those who don't have normative bodies, I don't know what else is. [9]

Jonathan Bradley: Eight bars of Missy rhyming tongue trills is worth the admission, but this beat isn't fucking anything up: the bass knocks but it doesn't move. A modulating arpeggio sounds like a placeholder waiting for the finished edit. Lizzo matches the effort; her last appearance round here underserved her personality, but here it's like she's waiting for a reason to show up. What she does offer are some very rote verses and a chorus that isn't sure it's not a verse. It's quite demure, even if you don't start to think on how unrestrained Missy could be in her heyday. [5]

Joshua Copperman: You know that old friend you had in high school that was into the same kind of music you were into? You said you'd stay in touch but grew apart from them because they were in a different, faster crowd than you? That's Lizzo. Her BJ Burton "artsy-fartsy phase" spawned some stellar, aggressive music, but her major-label music is more fun and positive to somewhat mixed results. Oak (of "Pop &" fame) made a manic beat more reminiscent of those early days, but the actual content is light enough to make room for cat puns including "prrr me a glass." It's a shame she won't go back to that earlier, more raw music when rappers like Cupcakke balance the high-concept antics with brutal honesty, but it's clear that's not what Lizzo feels like doing. That artsy phase increasingly feels like something she overcame than something she plans on revisiting. You occasionally hear back from that high school friend, but it's clear that they were never going to be the person you wanted them to be. But it's better to accept that because they're happier and freer the way they are now. They should really put away the guitar, though. [7]

Joshua Minsoo Kim: Two overrated artists release a song that sounds exactly like you'd expect? I find the fireworks and beat switch fake-outs more exciting than the vocals. When the song ends, I'm left with... nothing, really. Lizzo's recent singles have all been ordinary crowd pleasers, the sort of standard we should have for solid stock music. "Juice" felt like Facetuned Prince. "Tempo" is similarly watered down. [3]

Nortey Dowuona: *incoherent babbling* Lizzo going in *MORE INCOHERENT SHRIEKING* Missy going in *GLEEFUL HOWLS OF TORMENT AND JOY* A small Afro was found on top of the MSNBC offices yesterday. *sounds of confusion and slight annoyance* [10]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

#Lizzo #Missy Elliott #rap #hip hop #pop #music #music review #writing

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Yaaay!! Thank you Soraya's inbox, sorry i blamed you on eating the last ask😂😘. You did great. Nono, he wasnt a torero, he looked like a prince. (Which is not better bcs i dont like any of those  figures but... whatever). Ooh, talking about suits, did you see the ranking hsfashionarchive did of the suits he wore this tour? Bcn was winning, pink suit was second and Mdd was third!! (1)

[I hope this works 😜🙏🏻, bc this was TOO long, jajajaa.]

Ohhh. Your mom is the best. So supportive! Petition to give her that award. She is clearly the winner. (1D clinex? capitalism in its pure state 😂. Did they really made those? Glad i didnt find it on time bcs i would have definitely brought them as a joke to my sister or something). You are already playing Niall’s songs to her? Did she like them? Does she have anything similar to “pikachu get away” she had for SOTT?. (2)

JAJAJAJJA. Netflix always does that to me too. Dont know why. I started watching Black mirror backwards bcs of that. Did you understand anything of chapter 7 os ST? (Did you finish the show??). Yep. The 8th season is the last one, and i dont know hoe to feel about it. Dissapointed by the shows? As in with the ending?? Or how? (3)

You sound like a devoted cat lady, yes. Ooow, i have little cousins too, though they are reaching the age of “too cool to be seen with you, old girl” Of course they make me laugh. Honey is a menace and i appreciate it. JAJAJAJAJAJAJA. He ate the chorizo?? Honeeey!! 😂😂😂 that made me laugh at loud int the train and now my neighbour is looking at me weirdly. I see, you’ll never get bored with him. (4)

When i was younger and + close minded, i didnt like tattos. Considere also that the ones I had saw in real life were the tribal ones, so there’s tgat. But then i grew up and started liking them (you can partially blame larry for that). Nobody in my family (cousins and so) has one, and thats kind of a encouragement, I’d love to piss them, but my dad has threaten me to disinherit me (we dont heven have that, lol) and i dont have any tatto on mind, so i wont do it… maybe in the future, yes. (5)

I MISS LOUIS TOO! I hope he is fine. Resting and so. Im sure that creating the album that will destroy us all takes a lot of effort. (Seriously, where is heeeee?). Heeey!! I wont get bored. Or mad! I have such a great time talking to you. If i dont talk more its bcs of the character limit and bcs im always worried about pressuring or imposing. Dont be dumb. If i dont answer its bcs im busy with finals and so. Nothing more. Promise. (6)

THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING. i know i know. It makes sense and its a smart move, but… i cant stand raeggeton/latino, its not for me. Sad. I havent lost hope though. Maybe ill change my mind later Yeah, i have the same problem with my friends, they only listen to trap and raeggeton and i die everytime. We mostly agree to put something neutral like pop or the radio. (Disney songs never get old😂). (7)

Ay. I just saw that i wrote “heven” instead of “even” and now i want to delete myself. I was walking while writing the asks and i didnt proofread it. I feel so dumb. Anyway, sorry for sending so many asks (today i made a record xd) and, as always, good night!!————————————————————————-Hi!!!! Yes! I saw the ranking. But it isn’t exactly a ranking. It’s more to like chose wants your favorite suit. I did it and guess what? My first choice in the Madrid one, jajajaa. Second the kilt. And third the jumpsuit. Very accurate.

Oh, you’re telling me! My family bought me a bunch of 1D merch (unofficial all): the clinex, a hair brush, a bracelet, 2 books!, one perfume (this I love it, it smells so good), a make up box… I can’t even remember everything. Ah! A birthday card too!! Where they talk when you open it. I always use to wish happy birthday to people (the audio) 🤣🤣🤣🤣. I had to tell them to please stop wasting money on those things. I don’t even know where I have it. And if a can ask, I’d rather they give me the money so I can go to their concerts,jajajaja.EDIT: I can’t believe I forgot the poster!! I have it beside my head right now,jajaja, and I only realized it was there when I looked at the boys to ask for inspiration,😅😅)

Oh, my mom loves Niall’s album too. But I don’t think she “knows” any of the lyrics,jajaja. Though, she knows the hmmmm in This Town. But that’s all. She and my sister, both separately were like: “oh! who’s him??” When they heard Fire Away. And I was like: “ehhhhh, it’s Niall’s album, so guess who’s it?? What, you like it? See, Harry’s not the only one who can sing…” jajajajja. It’s because of comments like this, that they think I don’t like Harry. And I get so offended when they hint at it! Like, of course I like Harry. But I like all of them too!! God!! I love Niall’s album so much (I’m hearing it right now, bc I couldn’t remember what song was the one they liked it so much, and now I can’t stop 😅). Harry’s and Niall’s albums have been lining in my car since they were released. I had Harry’s playing in a loop till I got Niall’s one and I interchanged them. Then Harry’s came back a month or so before his concert. And now it’s time for Niall’s again. (You can’t imagine how hard it’s being writing this with honey laying on my arm!! Jajaja, I can’t barely move my fingers😅).

AND WHAT DID YOU DO WHEN YOU REALIZED YOU WERE WATCHING BLACK MIRROS BACKWARDS??? I’ve watched canter 1 and 2 of ST afterwards, but I hadn’t gotten to watch the whole thing yet. I can’t stand to be looking at a screen for 50minutes without doing anything. And don’t get me wrong, lol, I can be on tumblr for hours, jajaja, but a have to move my hand, and I can go from a blog to another… y'know, jajajajaja. And when I watched chapter 7 of ST i was like, okay… now they have to investigate what happened… or a guessed they would be doing flashbacks… jajajajajaja. Then I realized my mistake and thought I was stupid, 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣“I see you from a different point of view🎶🎶” ( sorry, that’s me singing,jajajaja, Seeing Blind. I LOVE that song)And shows have disappointed me in the sense that they turn out to have an awful ending (seriously, I know you do it for the audience, but end a show how it deserves it, don’t turn it into shit just for a handful of money); or bc they just end it bc they don’t have enough audience. It’s always a matter of audience,jajaja.if they have a lot, they want to explode it. And if they don’t have enough they finish it ASAP. 😒

Honey is a menace, yeh, I couldn’t love him more,jajajaja. He can’t see me petting Liam, he gets jealous and comes to me and headbutt my hand so I pet him too. And Liam is so patient with him. They’re totally like liam and Louis, jajja. Hey! did I tell you the story about when I got Liam? no!! Well, someone gave my dad 4 kitties (they were sooooo small). So, guess their names (it was post March 25, 2015…) yes!! They were named (by me) Louis, Niall, Harry and Liam, jajajajajja. But Harry died a couple of days later, because he was really really young. He couldn’t survive without his mom ☹️. And the other three, my dad took them to a place we have were he has a little garden (?) with vegetables and chickens and proper farm-y, jejeje. I wasn’t too (any) into cats back then, so… Then he brought home one of them, to have our home free of mice. AND IT WAS LIAM!! And I adopted him. I took care of him. We started loving each other. And he became useless with mice, jajaja. He’s totally domesticated now 😝. And that’s his story. The rest? Louis became a big alpha male at their new home. But s car ran him over last summer, and he died 😔. And Niall is a female, jajajajaa. And I hate her. Because she hasn’t been able to keep her kitties alive once!! (She’s pregame again, and we’re praying this time she knows who to be a mom🙏🏻) Ah!! And Honey had siblings the other day!! The guy who gave it to my dad is my brother’s friend and he show him a pic. There are two white cats!! I WANT THEM!!! But they don’t let me have anymore cats! Jajajajaja.

Hey, we might have in common the reason why we started liking tats, jajajjajaa. And, well, to piss off the family is as good a reason as any other,jajajaja. And why are dads like that?? When my sister and I got our lips pierced he went to pick up at the train station and as soon as he saw us he turned around and walked to the car without saying a word,jajajajja. I HAD TOLMY PARENTS WE WOULD BE DOING IT!! I asked my mom:hey mom, if a get a 10 in maths, can I get a piercing?? And she say okay. So I got a 10 (I might cheated or not on this, bc I already knew I had a 10, but wel…), and I got a piercing.my sister only got it, bc I was 16, she had to go with me as an adult, and giving she was already there, she got one too,jajajaja. (My granny almost kill us 😅)

Oh, louis has a BIG responsibility on his hands. He will be killing a lot of people when he puts out his album. He has to chose the proper songs to do it. It will be considered a massive destruction weapon, so he better be careful. But god, for real, when will Louis and Liam release their albums. At this pace, Harry and Niall will be releasing their second one before LiLo has finished their respective tours. And when they finish, Narry will have release their second one, and will be promoting them. So Lilo will start working in their seconds one. And… and… AND ONE DIRECTION WON’T COME BACK EVER BECAUSE THEY CAN FIX A DATE WHERE ALL OF THE BOYS HAVE NOTHING TO DO, AND WHAT WILL I DO??? 😭😭😭😭😭 (sorry, I panicked a bit there,oops).

Uggggg, I can’t stand raeggeton either. I can’t stand the music, argggg. Or the culture of it (the how it treats women, and glorifies sex). I can’t I can’t.and you can’t go out without hearing it. My friends and I went on road trip once. And it was my friend’s car. And she only listens to raeggeton. And after 10, 15, 40? minutes I had to ask her “will this song ever end???” And she told me it was already a different one. And I swear I almost jump out of the car,jajajajaja. We were crossing a bridge, and I wanted to jump out of the car!!!!! I couldn’t listen to that any more!!!!!  Ejkbvwirbfeuirnfrvoieefvnv The she caved and we switched to movie’s soundtracks,jajajaja.

Ha! Don’t worry about sending a lot of ask, I learn something, you’ll see,jajajajaa.Also, I forgot to ask early. Is your sister a 1d fan too, then? She goes to concerts and knows the song… how lucky! you have someone to talk about all the gossip!! (And they know what you’re talking about…) or is she a “casual” fan, and doesn’t get into fandom drama? She just likes the music and doesn’t care about their lives?are you both into drama?? God, I don’t discuss drama very much online, but if had someone face to face to talk about it… I would be the happiest person in the world,jajajajaa (what an exaggeration 🙊).

I think this is all. I LOVE ORPUR CONVERSATIONS!! Jajajaja( I hope I did it correctly and all this is under read more, jajaja)Byeeeeee!!!! 😚😚😚😚

#anon #iuubefvkjnevjknefv #it's the first time I put read more #I learnt how to do it yesterday (I had too google it #lol)

[pulledpurplecurtains]

Hi angel! Here: 6, 7, 32, 41, 47, 51, 55, 56, 57, 63, 68, 72, 74, 79, 87, 96, 98, 99 and 100! omg that's a lot, have fun listening to all those songs =D

hi love! these are indeed a lot of numbers, which only means more procrastination for me skdhfjkdsf i’m very excited, let’s see!

6: do you keep plants? ughhhh i wish i could but i’m useless and they all just wither away sooner or later skjdfjsdf i’ve tried it many times and the same thing kept happening smh

7: do you name your plants? kjsdhfjssk i love naming things, and i had named some of my plants through the years

32: tell us a story of something that happened to you after 3AM when you were with friends. answered!

41: what’s the last book you remember really, really loving? oof this is hard, i haven’t read an actual book in so damn long and i blame fanfiction for that kjdsskj so if i may, i’ll say my own book, which i’ve finished for some months now and which i should really edit and transfer to my computer (it’s handwritten) at some point soon

47: what food do you think should be banned from the universe? actually, none! there are a few foods i don’t eat and others that i eat very begrudgingly, but let the people have their food!! (it would be any and all kinds of oyster if i had to pick, though. nasty little asshats)

51: think of a person. what song do you associate with them? Stars are On Your Side by Ross Copperman <3

55: what’s the most dramatic thing you’ve ever done to prove a point? i can be a very dramatic person in how i speak and exist, but usually not when trying to prove a point kjdfhgkdk so nothing really comes to mind i’m sorry love!

56: what are some things you find endearing in people? awkwardness is very endearing always, especially when coupled up with shyness, softness, humor, or kind gestures. seeing people caring for others in unassuming ways. people’s cute lil quirks, like small everyday stuff, that give them joy and they get so excited about. on that note, people getting excited about things from 0-100 is always very endearing as well. people being passionate and ‘nerdy’ about things they love.

57: go listen to bohemian rhapsody. how did it make you feel? did you dramatically reenact the lyrics? omg which one, there’s two!!!! i’m taking the liberty to listen to the Queens one?? brb ---> OH BOY was that song a rollercoaster of journey! first, it made me think back to a very dark period in my life, then i was like sjdhfjsdf what is happening???, then it filled me with such a bright and soothing sense of hope, and by the end it felt like i was talking to my brain, telling the stupid thing to sit down and shut up. i did not dramatically reenact the lyrics though, no lmaoo

63: are you fussy about your books and music? do you keep them meticulously organized or kinda leave them be? oh i have a system about everything, nevermind that that system may seem to other people completely illogical and like utter chaos instead sdjhfhjsd so yes, i have a system abt books and my music and i always get fussy abt it, like with all of my systems 

68: what’s winter like where you live? it’s usually dry cold, humidity is quite rare here. it can get windy, but nothing too crazy, and many days are sunny which is just the loveliest thing. temperatures can go sub zero celsius, but a usual winter day is around 5 above zero? give or take? we don’t get heavy snow usually, but it will snow at least a few times through the winter. i do wish we had more snow, though, i love the snow 

72: are you a person who needs to note everything down or else you’ll forget it? depends on how many things i have to remember, and how far away they are. but generally if it’s more than one thing and more than a few days away i do have to write them down, yes skjdfhjsd my memory can be extremely poor and my brain despises multitasking even in thinking form

74: describe a good friend of yours without using their name or gendered pronouns. bright, brown eyes. curly, and many times frizzy, blonde hair. heart-warming smile. out-spoken. caring. thoughtful. encouraging. supportive. sensitive but you wouldn’t think so. hard-working. dedicated. a realist but generally positive

79: what’s one of the cutest things someone has ever done for you? hmm one of the cutest? i can think of so many heart-warming gestures, but i wouldn’t necessarily categorize them as cute. a certain someone indulging my love for snow and my daydreaming centered around it when i know they hate the cold is what comes to mind

87: what are some movies you think everyone should watch at least once in their lives? oh this is a hard one. Titanic and The 12 Jurors come to mind instantly, as does Miracle on 34th street. all the disney movies. and god i’m sure there are many more i’d be like OH this one too! but my brain is so bad with movies ksdjhfskj

96: do you install your computer updates really quickly or do you procrastinate on them a lot? lmao i procrastinate until my computer decides to install them itself and then i grumble the entire time it does so

98: when’s the last time you went hiking? did you enjoy it? i love suburban long walks, nature long walks are one of my most dreaded nightmares sjfjskdfk last time i did that last one was in summer of 2018 and i enjoyed it afterwards, when the experience settled in, because a friend and me reached a beautiful natural spring by the end of the hike (and then we had to hike all the way back, which i don’t even wanna think about)

99: list some songs that resonate to your soul whenever you hear them. It’s My Life by Bon Jovi, This is Me Trying by Taylor Swift, Perno Ena Podilato by Kostas Makedonas (it’s a greek one), Titanium by David Guetta ft. Sia, Stars are On Your Side by Ross Copperman

100: if you were presented with two buttons, one that allows you to go 5 years into the past, the other 5 years into the future, which one would you press? why?   neither. my past is part of me and it has made me who i am but going back to it, especially to 2015, is not something i would wanna do or that would be helpful to me in any way. and as for the future, i believe our actions every day shape and change what are future will look like. so even if i saw it, i don’t know that it would stay the same; so i wouldn’t have gained anything. if it did stay the same, i’m partly afraid to find out in case it turns out my dreams don’t come true. but also, no matter how much i don’t like the unknown, that’s how the future is supposed to be. that’s life. and i’m okay with that. so neither 

BOY were these a lot of questions! but i spent a wonderful one and half hours answering them all and doing no actual work sjdhfjsdhfjs so thank you love!

#aubreys-posen #ask #ask game #this took forever sjdkfhjksd love u my other spice half

[carousels-on-fire]

I’ll go months without listening to Cradle of Filth then every once in a while the love and nostalgia hits me like a freight train.  I still know (mostly) every word to every album from Darkly, Darkly, Venus Aversa back. I could tell you most of the band members names, and have been a lot of them. I could tell you anecdotes and random useless knowledge. Mostly because I grew up in a small town where no one really listened to metal, so I spent all my time just reading interviews and wikipedia, and memorizing lyrics. I spent most of my very very little money as a teenager on t-shirts, CDs, dvds, special editions, etc. I remember getting in trouble with a friend’s mom because I wanted us to watch the DVD with their music videos. Which is funny because I had no real concept of why they were considered inappropriate. (Lol!) I wish they weren’t seen as something of a joke, or something people look down on you for, they’re really such brilliant musicians, and the lyrics are so clever and dark and poetic. And their music videos are always so beautifully put together.  It also makes me sad because so few people I know irl like them or care. <3 <3 <3 Band of my heart since I was 13! 

#Cradle of Filth