#but i cant imagine what my life would be like just growing up living with my parents and siblings and having to go to separate houses to

[silenthillbunni]

🐰🌧️

#so on my way home.. #i walked by a school and besides the fact that i felt so depressed bc just looking at these kids and adults i have NO hope for the future #i saw two boys on a bench as i walked by... and i just thought they were talking. and too late i realized that no one of the boys were #bullying the other boy. the bully walked away and the other boy just sat there looking so lifeless and dejected #a teacher came and sat down w that boy and i just kept walking. even if i wanted to say smth it's like what would i even do abt that situati #that made me so sad both bc that boy.. he looked so dejected and used to it. that anxiety going to school knowing you're bullied is awful #and like i imagined talking to him and saying heyyy if you're lucky you'll grow up to be 25yrs old #live like a parasite off your mom and be on wellfare and never have had a job :) #you'll have no education or highschool diploma :) you will still struggle to finish hs even at an easier level :) #you will also not have had friends in 10yrs and you'll be terrified of ppl and getting close to anyone and even going outside!! #you'll have no interests and hobbies and skills! you'll simply be a waste of space loser being a burden on everyone around u! #whoop whoop stay alive buddy it will only get worse ❤️ #god i just wanna cry. how did i let my life turn out this way??? i used to be full of dreams and life and passion and HOPE #i used to believe in things and in people. i had so many dreams and i wanted to try and do so many things #now all i can think is 'i wanna die i wanna die i wanna die'. im miserable wherever i go lmao #there's this bridge over the highway i have to cross when i walk to school and every time i look down at the trafic and when a truck drives #by i feel my entire body vibrate. i just wanna jump and get mauled by it. #or i dont *want* to but i feel so deeply and desperately that it's the only way for me #only way to make it stop hurting. and i am weak. i dont know how to just 'stop' or take control of my life. thats why i wanna die #bc i know that i wont be able to. that my life will never amount to anything #for fuck's sake my dream now is just to have my own 1bedroom apartment and have a shitty job - like in a grocery store or whatever!!!!! #not even that can i make happen! bc im so worthless i cant do anything. im also stupid so i wouldnt be able to do my job right #i dont know... i dont know... these feelings and thoughts are too much i just wanna relax #but i cant bc my ribs hurt and idk if it's heartburn or an ulcer 💀 why am i even alive???? what am i doing all this for? 😭 #my thoughts ran away but i meant like seeing that reminded me of how much of a failure i became #bc of my circumstances and all the shitty ppl around me thru out my life

[griffonsgrove]

Hiiii!!! See your doing writing requests for Hazbin, Its my hyperfixation so I am in need of more content 👀 so I'd like to request maybe Vox general or NSFW headcanon ( either one is good lol-) with a afab reader maybe? This is my first time requesting something like this so sorry if I'm a little nervous or bad at requesting. I think this is how people are supposed to request? XD

General Dating Headcanons | Vox

a/n: You're totally alright dear! You said everything just fine! As I've stated before, I got early access to the first two episodes, and it's been so interesting to analyze vox's character! I hope I can do him justice!! He's starting to grow on me now. I'm gonna stick with a gn!reader just because these are general headcanons and I want them to be suited for anyone!

fandom: Hazbin Hotel

wordcount: 1299

cw: SPOILERS FOR HAZBIN HOTEL, swearing, vulgar content, stalking, death and mentions of death/murder., toxic/absuive relationships.

(PLATONIC):

Vox’s got eyes EVERYWHERE in hell. There is no escaping his line of sight unless you go completely off the grid. Which is pretty difficult to do when the entirety of pentagram city is covered head to toe in VoxTech.

However, if you don't pose a threat to him, he really doesn't give a shit about you otherwise, and won’t pay that much attention to your life.

When you first fell into hell, you were mostly confused as to how you wound up here in the first place. That quickly subsided into fear as you noticed the large variety of demons and sinners casually walking down the sidewalk like it was an average tuesday. 

You’ll never forget the sight of seeing a demon gnaw off the arm of another and swallow it whole, like it was an all-you-can-eat buffet. 

You wander aimlessly down the streets, keeping to yourself and being very cautious of those around you. Your clothes were in tatters, and you didn't have any form of money whatsoever, what were you to do??

You had two options: Somehow find a job in this new horrific realm, or, die.

You didn't care too much for the latter.

This is how you stumble across one of the largest studios/clubs in hell, owned by probably the most feared overlords in pentagram city. The V’s. 

You get hired to be nothing more than a waiter/waitress, to serve the patrons of the club, mostly serving them their drinks.

You weren't too fond of the work uniform either. It left nothing to the imagination, and exposed alot of skin, far too much to your liking. The job actually paid somewhat decently though and it was enough to be able to sustain a living. You were quick to rent out the nearest apartment.

One day, while you’re out on the main floor, making your rounds, your eyes briefly lock with the TV demon across a sea of sinners. Call it cheesy, but it was almost like a spark went off the moment he laid eyes on you. Which is something that doesn't happen often with the tech-savvy overlord. Who were you??

He lazily beckons you over with a claw, to which you obediently follow, although it doesn't hide the sheer nervousness written all over your face, He gives you his drink order in that sultry, velvet voice of his, eyeing you up. You gulp slightly and are quick to bring him his order. He thought you were so cute trembling for him.

He begins to stalk observe you closer after that. If you have any electronic devices he’ll watch you through your screens, trying to get a glimpse into what your life was like outside of work. The things you enjoyed doing in your free time, favorite shows, foods etc.

He def goes through your search history.

He would start showing up more in the sections you worked at, oftentimes minding his business, but occasionally striking up a conversation with you.

You did have to admit he was quite the charmer, his smooth voice was hypnotic to you.

OBSESSIVE TENDENCIES. If he notices some creep won't leave you alone while you're working, he’ll take care of them personally, it’s never a pretty sight afterwards. He cant have anyone taking what's his.

You're oblivious to his stalking and possessiveness, you don't think much of it, maybe that's because he puts on a friendly face when you’re around him.

But after some time of getting to know you, He’s the one that eventually asks you out on a “date”. You’re skeptical at first, but decide to accept his offer. And also partially because you were afraid of what would happen if you said no.

(ROMANTIC):

Ngl it’s kind of a situationship in the beginning.

Vox is a busy man, it’s constant work maintaining the studios (especially valentinos temper) and managing the entirety of hell's technology. So, he may ghost you at first.

That being said, He will still keep an eye on you. He often watches through your phone while you sleep, just to make sure you’re safe. Hell is a dangerous place after all.

Speaking of, you’re now under the protection of the V’s, so that’s a plus! You never have to worry about another demon laying a finger on you. They usually never get close enough to anyways.

He very easily gets jealous. He won't show it on the outside because he has an image to uphold, but you can tell every time from that crazed look in his eyes.

Vox is a possessive lover; he wants to keep you all to himself. If he could, he’d keep you locked up by his side all day.

CONTROLLING. He HAS to know where you’re at, at all times, and who you’re going to be with (lest you face one of his tantrums). Also dictates what you wear, He likes to dress you up to his liking, like you’re his own personal doll.

Insecure much?

Say goodbye to privacy btw. He constantly has you in the back of his mind and a watchful eye on you. It can be kind of suffocating at times. The two of you have gotten into a few arguments because of this.

Valentino gets jealous of you too. How dare you take his boy-toy away from him? He’s often giving you the stink eye and will threaten you behind vox’s back. You’re too scared to tell Vox, because you don't want to face Val’s wrath.

You know briefly of his and Val’s “relationship” it all had seemed very one-sided and completely unhealthy.

You're often having to calm Vox down. The man has a very short temper and is easily provoked. 

Imagine you pressing little kisses to his screen after he found out about Alastor’s return. He remains stoic, but secretly enjoys your affection.

Some of the pet names he loves to call you include; Doll, Dear, Darling, Sweetheart, Babe.

Pretty old-fashioned ik, but he's a classy man alright?

He tends to be pretty touchy, always having a clawed hand on the small of your back, or an arm wrapped around your waist. It’s more of a possessive trait of his, to keep what's his close.

He loves having you sprawled on his lap while he’s in his screen room, you stay nuzzled into his side, often taking naps while he does broadcasts.

He TOTALLY spoils you btw. He’s one of the most powerful overlords in hell, ofc he has the money to show it. Whatever dingy apartment you had before, forget about it bc this man has you living in a penthouse suite in one of the most expensive apartment buildings. He sees you looking at something in a store or online?? Boom, it’s yours now.

He loves buying you clothes, as I’ve said before, you're his “doll” and he loves playing dress up with you.

And if you buy him something?? He’s taken by surprise at first, he’s never really been on the receiving end of that affection, so whatever it is you give him he’ll cherish it.

If you ever have someone bothering you, or want to get rid of, you just say the word babe. He’ll be feeding them to his sharks >:)

The man is emotionally constipated, ok?? All he’s ever known from relationships is what he shared with Val (and trust me that was a train wreck). He’s rough around the edges, short-tempered and isn't always easy to get along with, and he’s incredibly possessive which can be suffocating to deal with at times. This probably stems from him not wanting to actually be alone, He doesn't want you to slip out of his grasp, so he keeps a tight leash on you. But underneath all these flaws, he really does love you and care about you. At the end of the day, He just wants someone that will stay.

#hazbinhotel #hazbinhotelxreader #xreader #gender neutral reader #vox x reader #vox #vox hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel vox #hazbin x reader #headcanons #dating headcanons #hazbin hotel vox x reader #hazbin

[hearts4chriss]

𝐁𝐚𝐛𝐲𝐬𝐚𝐭 𝐛𝐲 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐫𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐬 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝.

𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐄 𝐃𝐎𝐄'𝐒 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄 𝐒𝐈𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑

Brothers bestfriend! Chris + needy! Nate’s lil sis

prompt: Nate ( ur older brother ) wants to go out for a bit with some of his other friends and he doesn’t trust you enough to stay home by urself without mom and dad since they won’t be there either. So he asks one of his best friend Chris to stay over and watch you, Matt and nick know ur crush on Chris so they pretend they can’t come.

Part 01

contains: masturbation ( no actual sex ), use of y/n ( sorry I have to ) dirty fantasies ( pet names, rough! Chris, dirty talk, degrading, forced head etc just beyond FILTHLY imagination ), use of vibrator on reader, caught by Chris, FORESHADOWING, fantasy will be like this

Nate are you serious I’m not 12! I whine when said he was gonna find a baby sitter for me knowing how much it pisses me off

I’m Nate doe’s little sister I’m 18, we’ve Been close to his bestfriends the sturniolo triplets. So obviously him being my brother naturally I got to know them.

Nick

I clicked with him superrr fast, I love his energy and when I found out he was gay that just made it all the better because I’ve always wanted a gay bestfriend, and we always have sleepovers :)

Matt

Matt’s absolutely adorable I love him he always helps me calm down whenever I’m about to or am having a panic attack, I remember one time during a test I forgot everything and almost had one and he slid me the answers. Love that kid

now there’s a reason I saved Chris for last,

Chris

chris and I know each other just as well if not even more then I do his other two brothers, we haven’t done anything unfortunately. I’ve had a crush on him since middle school.

First I just wanted to kiss him and hold his hand.

Then go to his house and do some more.

Then now, as an 18 year old I wanted him to fuck my Brains out.

I’m around him all the time since we all live in LA and always hanging out, I always see him shirtless and fucking hell it turns me on, I always get lucky since nick and matt found of my attraction to his brother they always snap me or text me pictures of him.

What sucks is I cant have him. It would take my life 1000 times over for me to be able to fuck chris sturniolo, and it sucks because my brother nate does not play that shit.

He strictly said "your not allowed to date any of them" obviously referring to matt and Chris.

Which also doesn't help because my wants and desires a hormonal teenage-adult girl only grow more whenever he comes around, chris is always there.

Now today, nate had to run some errands and nick matt and chris used to watch me when I was younger if my parents couldn't

Buttt, nick and matt "could not come due to personal issues" so. Your guess is right, im gonna be alone with chris for hours.

That thought alone made me soak in my p-

“Y/n! are you listening to me kid?” My older brother chuckles leaning against my doorway of my room as im on my bed watching "The Vampire Diaries".

“Huh? oh yeah im listening matt and nick cant come so chris is because im fucking 11.” I roll my eyes hiding my excitement from him watching me.

“Don't think of any weird shit alright? He's just watching you so don't-“

“Ugh is he here yet? You're annoying me already.” I groan shifting in my sheets and taking a sip from my celsius hearin our door open, they have a key.

“Welp thats chris.” Nate says tilting his head for me to get up.

I get up from the sheets wearing some pink sleep shorts and a white t-shirt and he raises an eyebrow.

“Your wearing THAT? around chris?” Nate chuckles and I flip him off.

“Hey! I heard that!.” Chris yells coming up the stairs sounding offended.

He's now at the top of the steps. oh my fuck he looks so good.

Its around 6ish in LA right now and hes wearing a black tank top and grey fresh love sweats, slight stubble and his hair was a bit messy which I always liked and my eyes immediately drifted to his natural bulge in his pants as him and Nate were talking.

“Just make sure she doesn’t get into any trouble.” Nate puts his arm around me giving me a hug and Chris chuckles.

“Don’t worry bro she’s safe with me.” He says before dapping him up as Nate leaves the house. yeah safer if you were balls deep inside

Oh god Chris sh-shit so-d-deep inside me

Yeah? You feel me deep inside you baby?

bro she’s like zoning out today. Nate chuckled and I snap out of it

Whatever no I wasn’t! Just go!

Soon after it was just me and Chris so we made our way down to the living room

“Where are ur other two clones?” I chuckle getting situated on the couch before turning on a movie saltburn

“they have “personal issues”.” He said rolling his eyes causing a small laugh to fall from my lips.

“So it’s just you and me little one.” A smirk curving on his lips, just enough for my panties to be soaked.

Shut up Chris I’m 18.I mutter trying to watch the movie in peace and he chuckles

the movie went on and it was now, the bathtub scene where jacob elordi ( Felix ) is jerking off.

I peer over to Chris whose eyes are clearly fixated on the screen as my squeeze my thighs together under the blanket feeling all my hormonal thoughts leaking through my panties.

This had nothing to do with the movie, it’s the thought for Chris doing that to himself that had turned me on most. The tension so thick a knife couldn’t even cut through.

“Uhm I-i gotta go to the bathroom”. I nearly choke and I fix my shorts placing the blanket down where I was sitting.

“Don’t take to long I’ll miss you.” He chuckles and that didn’t help.

I go to my room and close the door squeezing my eyes shut.

I had maybe 5 minutes to relieve myself.

I quickly reach into my drawer grabbing my vibrating dildo and the remote for it.

I pull down my shorts and panties and spread my legs letting the tip of the toy get coated in my wetness and I bite my lip slightly feeling the thickness of it.

I turned it on letting out a soft moan slowly inserting it, wishing this was Chris’s dick instead.

I began thrusting the toy in and out of my pussy letting the squelching sounds of arousal grow letting it drip down curling my toes throwing my head on the pillows allowing my mind to drift

I was in Chris’s/my room my head smushed in the pillows as his cock rammed inside me whilst I was on my stomach. His hips slamming against my ass and his hand wrapped around my lower stomach as I cried out his name

Fuck fuckk so d-deep- I whimper into the pillows as he was bringing me to my 4th orgasm, we had switched numerous positions and my legs were quivering in front of him as he laid a hard snack to my ass chucking behind me.

such a fucking slut letting me fuck you like this, imagine if ur brother found out his little sister was getting her pussy pounded by his bestfriend. He laid another harsh smack to my ass and I jolted forward.

stretched this pussy out so good- he groans rubbing my clit to chase both our orgasms.

ngh- o-oh shit- fuck- I gripped the sheets tightly curses of Chris’s name flew out my mouth feeling my eyes water from the angle of his hips thrusting allowing his thick cock to hit every single spot inside me

come on sweetheart cum for me, you have another one in you yeah? He grunted lowly in my ear kissing me sloppily as a string of Saliva parts from our lips each time we kiss moaning into each others mouths.

“Oh fuck Chris I-“ I curl my toes and yell loudly as I’m about to release on the toy before I look up and see Chris. Was. Watching me.

“Were you playing with yourself?” Chris leans on the doorway of my room his eyes darting to between ny legs as I was thrusting the toy in and out of me and I quickly covered up my cheeks flush with embarrassment.

“Uhm…maybe. Sorry I-I’ll be down in a second-“

Maybe I can help. Chris says closing the door to my room approaching my bed

@mattsleftnipple03 @bernardsleftbootycheek @sturniolopowers @gdsvhtwa @rac00ns-are-c00l4 @worldlxvlys @chrisslut25 @princessbetsy123-blog @mattslolita @guccifrog @blahbel668 @mattsneezing @trickywritters @hearts4chris

@nonamegirlxsturniolo @luvmxtt @theyluv-meee @mattsnymphette @hoesformatt @luv4kozume @kikisturnioloo @pepsiimaxx @babyddolly @iiheartstef @junnniiieee07 @ast3ro1dzz @sturniolowhore @st7rnioioss @emma4eva @braindead4l @ihearttsyouu @blondiesjailer @kqyslyho3 @sturnsfav @sunsetsturniolos @sturniololoverr @stqrnstars @dlyansworld @soimightlikeoldmen69 @abbie13sworld @lacysturniolo @sturniol0s @chrissgirlsstuff @leah-loves-lilies @luhsexcbihh @nicksmainbitch

#chris sturniolo #matt sturniolo #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo smut #nick sturniolo #chris sturniolo smut #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #smut #nicolas sturniolo #hearts4chriss #babyddolly is my fucking girl #🩷 nate doe’s little sister series!

[scuderiadream]

in between

reader x oscar piastri

⊹ ࣪ ˖ summary : oscar and y/n has been friends ever since their childhood but as time grew their feelings grew too but they're too afraid of losing their friendship, eventually they take a leap of faith and risks everything

⊹ ࣪ ˖ faceclaim : sabrina carpenter

⊹ ࣪ ˖ author's note : sorry for not being active these days lolol i've been busy lately anyhow, happy reading this friends to lover au! <3

ᝰ 𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭

oscar piastri was regarded as one of the most gifted drivers on the circuit in the thrilling world of formula 1 racing, where emotion and speed meet. he lived a life of adrenaline and triumph, surrounded by the sound of roaring motors and the smell of burning rubber. but despite the fame and glamour, there was one person who saw oscar differently - y/n, an ordinary girl who had been his friend since childhood.

oscar and y/n had many adventures together while growing up in a tiny town, and their bond changed as time went on. over time, their friendship only got stronger as they helped one another through all of life's ups and downs. they encouraged one another through adversity and shared in each other's victories. they had an unshakable bond.

oscar soon had the chance to follow his goals of being an f1 driver as time passed quickly. he put in endless hours of training, giving it everything he had to become the best in motorsport. throughout the trip, y/n stood by his side throughout the journey, cheering him on from the sidelines.

as oscar's career took off, his life became a whirlwind of speed circuits, international races, and press conferences. he found himself becoming the center of attention, attracting the eyes of countless fans and the media. but amidst all the glamour, oscar always made time for y/n.

oscar had it all, trophy after trophy, sponsorships after sponsorship, and the love of fans everywhere. nevertheless, despite the successes, he felt an unsaid yearning in his heart. he yearned for something more—a love that transcended the confines of friendship.

many fans loved oscar and y/n's friendship, but they were unaware of what was going on behind the scenes. they would often catch themselves blushing and stealing glances at each other, late-night conversations turned from laughter to lingering gazes and held secrets. the tension between them became undeniable.

they both knew they were falling in love, but they were too scared to talk about it for fear of ruining their close friendship.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

after a grueling race in monaco, as oscar stood on the podium after winning the race, he looked into the crowd, his eyes locked with y/n's as her eyes starts to glimmer admiring him. in that moment, he realized that life was too short to hold back.

when the evening came, oscar and y/n found themselves alone on a terrace overlooking the shimmering harbor after their post-race party. the gentle sea breeze carried their whispers, as if the universe itself eavesdropped on their unspoken desires.

"the world sees us as just friend, y/n" oscar confessed as he fidgets with his hand as his eyes reflecting vulnerability, "but my heart yearns for more—i cant imagine my life without you by my side"

y/n smiled, the moonlight illuminating her face with a soft glow "oscar, you've always been the one constant in my life, i've loved you for as long as i can remember, i was just afraid—afraid of losing what we have, maybe its time we take that leap of faith"

with those words, oscar pulled her into a passionate kiss with his hands around her waist, embarking on a brave new chapter of their lives. they took the leap, their hearts intertwined, as they ventured into uncharted territory. the world held its breath as the news of their blossoming romance spread like wildfire.

oscarpiastri

liked by yourusername, landonorris, mclaren and 420.443 others

tagged: yourusername

oscarpiastri i'm happier winning over you than winning the race

view all 3.243 comments

yourusername not the cringy ass caption💀

⤷ oscarpiastri shut up and appreciate it.

mclaren cutest couple! ❤️

username NOT THE SUDDEN HARD LAUNCH LMAOO

username damn what took them so long to realize

landonorris FINALLY, after years

⤷ oscarpiastri you weren't helping mate

their newfound love took them on a whirlwind journey. y/n began joining oscar as he traveled from one race to another, the thrill of the speedway now shared between them. with every victory, oscar's eyes searched for y/n amidst the cheers of the crowd, finding solace in her unwavering support.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧✩₊˚.⋆

credits to pinterest for the pics .

#f1 #au #f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 x female reader #f1 x reader #f1 x y/n #f1 x you #fanfiction #formula one #formula 1 #f1 fic #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 x you #formula 1 x y/n #formula 1 x female reader #formula one x y/n #formula one x you #formula one x reader #formula one imagine #formula one fanfiction #oscar piastri #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri x you #f1 2023 #fanfic

[cupiohearts]

I WISH YOU LOVE ! - reminiscing with gun.

(cant catch me now series). GUN VER. dg ver. goo ver

they see you everywhere. james, jonggun, joongoo. they find bits and pieces of you lying around in their pockets, their houses and memories. it depends on which one it is which scene they see you in.

for GUN, he cant figure out for the life of anyone why they would wish someone that moved on in life the best of luck. he was a selfish man. when you disappeared from him, he mutters bitterly to himself wishing curses upon your name. the tear drops on the letter you wrote to him being the symbolism behind it all.

why would he want you to do well without him? why did you have to leave him?

did you not care as much as you said you did? he furrows his eyebrow. taking another drag out of his cigarette while he watches the stupid couple on the street pick out matching items for each other.

"jonggun! jonggun! look come here! hurry up!" you hiss at him as you press your face against the glass of a window. it was the pet adoption center. a calico cat taking a nap in the window as you cood at it.

that was the ugliest cat hes ever seen. it's eyes looked a bit too similar to the one you always give him when you want him to do something ridiculous for you.

"its cute" he gruffly says. you raise an eyebrow at him and made a face "youre a big fat liar. when we grow old with joongoo and james! we should all get a cat together!"

you giggle as you wiggled your finger at the cat. your breath fogging up the glass and when you pulled away he could see a slight bit of lipgloss- or lip tint- or whatever you were wearing on your lips that left it all glossy and shimmery left on the window.

he didnt say anything about it. he probably shouldve. you left the window dirty with your makeup. the same lips he imagined himself kissing from to time.

he thinks again. gun is a selfish man. when he read the letter you gave him, he thinks to himself for a far longer period of time than what he would appreciate.

he picks up the small camera you left behind in your apartment. he kept it with him for some reason. it was to keep videos and photos of yourself so he wont forget all of the times hes had with you.

"gun stop! stop! stop- what in the world happened here?!" your voice can be heard from behind the camera. the camera work a bit shaky as you walk closer to the restaurant.

there were a lot of bodies on the floor. a lot. "did you take them all down by yourself?" you ask him. you already knew the answer. he didnt need to respond but he did "yes"

you let out a deep sigh "this was supposed to be a cute video! you just ruined it. i wanted to send my mom and dad videos of me while im still here!"

you never sent it. he almost wished you did. so your parents knew what your friends were in korea. gangsters hanging out with the most.. sane one. sane is a strong word. hed think more like you were the glue.

you held everyone together, but at the same time. you were the one keeping them in the past.

that wasnt what he thought as he read your note though.

while he reading the shaky lines with splotchy text. the tears you left on the paper made it all crumbly and the words were hard to read.

he could only wish you the worst time without him. you better not be happier than you were with him. thats how you made him feel. he felt like the vines growing around the fence around you. his growth was hindered by the boundaries you had. if you werent there, he wouldve probably never grown in the first place, but you were also the reason he couldnt get better.

even as he read the lines 'jongun, you are the one who destroyed me the most.' he felt a small smile come to his face. he really is the most selfish person he knew.

sooooo... im here. I DID THE SECONDPARTY YIPPEE 😋😋 is it messy idk

i havent proof read so im assuming its ok. if its ooc mb brother.

their personalities are hard to capture anyways live laufh love the lookism blondes <3 the hottest in the game frl

#lookism scenarios #lookism #lookism x reader #lookism fluff #gun lookism #gun x reader #park jonggun #jonggun x reader

[xjulixred45x]

I see a lot of Kusakabe talk lately. Can I please ask for General relationship HCs for our resident lazy sorcerer <3

FINNALLY SOME NEW CHARACTERS!!! I don't like Kusabake that much, but Def His memes makes me laugh so considerate it done. Thanks for the Request❤️

Atsuya Kusakabe General Dating Headcanons

Genre: Headcanons

Reader: neutral

Warnings: typical canon violence, some spoilers of the manga.

Okay, for starters, YOU CANT TELL ME THAT HIS S/O IS NOT ONE OF THE REASONS THIS MAN VALUES HIS LIVE SO MUCH!

We all know that Kusakabe, although he is quite strong, does not really want to risk dying and prefers tasks that do not endanger his life, such as evacuating civilians and facing minor curses.

partly because he appreciates his life...and partly because I don't think he wants to cause pain to the few people he loves (reader included).

He wants to LIVE HIS LIFE with his s/o, he doesn't want to die prematurely and leave them alone!

I firmly believe that if he had a partner they would probably be a civilian, because 1- then he wouldn't have to worry about them dying because of sorcery work and 2- he can finally have some normality and peace of mind.

TELL ME THIS MAN IS NOT LOOKING FOR TRANQUILITY WHEN HE IS THE TEACHER OF A GROUP OF SUPER POWERFUL CHILDREN. OF WHICH *TOUDO* HIMSELF IS A PART

I imagine him in part as a boyfriend-father, who, although he is usually quite serious, usually shows that he cares in other ways, such as asking if you have eaten, buying food if you haven't, going for a walk to clear your head if you feel overwhelmed. . that kind of things.

As I said before, he is someone who appreciates tranquility a lot compared to his rather hectic life, so I think he would meet his s/o somewhere where he often lives as a civilian, perhaps (similar to Nanami with the girl at the bread) from some place where he goes to eat after his missions.

You could say that seeing his s/o gives him a hit of dopamine.

THERE IS DEFINITELY NO WAY YOU LET YOUR STUDENTS KNOW ABOUT YOUR S/O. he wants to save himself from Miwa's constant teasing and questions.

although maybe after a while (and only to Miwa) I show ONE (1) photo and brag a little about them.

There is also a possibility that he ends up talking a little about his s/o to Panda in Shibuya, just to calm down and not be so stressed, you could say that is the effect it has on him.

I can see him as a protective boyfriend, more than anything because just as he appreciates his life a lot, he appreciates his s/o's A LOT MORE, and will give him priority over that of others (he thinks it's appropriate, they are civilians after all).

There's not much chance that he'll end up running into his s/o during a mission, but that can either automatically lower his stress level considerably or raise it to unimaginable levels.

If it were a normal mission, it is most likely the first case, since there he can simply greet his s/o and have them go somewhere else for "safety issues" and be reassured that they are away from danger. even if it is a lesser grade curse.

Now, if his s/o were involved in a mission like SHIBUYA he's definitely losing his shit trying to protect them. and he is escorting them all the time with Panda to wherever it is safe and far from danger.

He grows green gray hair, as we say in my country.

It doesn't mean he's against his s/o going to see him at work! Quite the opposite, but he prefers that they go see him when he is a teacher.

I think he would especially like it if his s/o brings him food (whether made by them or bought) or something like that (more cigarettes/candy) and he is very grateful.

Although he doesn't like to share his love life with his students, he is DEFINITELY bragging to his workmates about how he DOES HAVE TIME for good things and that he doesn't regret anything >:)

He's like "that's what happens to you for not doing things the easy way, not like me, I even have an INCREDIBLE and very pretty partner😎" he's shameless.

I would say that his main language of affection would be compliments in a certain way, he knows what to say to get his way in situations where it is required, but with his partner that translates to what he knows what to say to cheer them up or make their day better. .

apart from the fact that he is much more attentive than one would think due to his vague nature.

He remembers his partner's main dislikes well, although he sometimes uses that against them to joke with them (for example, if they don't like bugs, he will chase them with a spider around the house) but he never takes it too far. It's just a little fun between the two.

Apart from that he knows very well when his partner really likes something or if he only says he likes it so as not to hurt his feelings, which is nice, but he prefers sincerity in those types of aspects.

very direct.

Let's say that just as he greatly appreciates his life and KNOWS that he could die at any moment, he doesn't want to waste time, so he is going to be as direct as possible with his s/o if what he wants is something lasting or something temporary, he will do it. which is very good for the relationship honestly.

I think his Achilles heel with the relationship would be PDA, I mean, he doesn't mind things like holding hands or kissing in public, but I don't think he does much more or at least with people around.

low key his s/o will be the one who initiates physical contact at the beginning.

The dates are usually either somewhere preferred by both (anywhere where salmon eyes don't work, please) or right at home watching ridiculous movies to disconnect a little from reality.

or even just be silent for a while with your s/o, at PEACE and let things flow in your head, this is what you do more than anything on a particularly bad day at work.

Sometimes he blurts out sudden thoughts about thoughts he's keeping from work to his partner, it's completely unintentional, but it helps him open up more honestly to his partner.

He's generally pretty open about almost everything, EXCEPT his job, so his s/o has to appreciate those kinds of moments of vulnerability.

As for issues of, for example, settling down, I think he wouldn't be against it at all.

His job already causes him enough stress, it is not unreasonable to think that one day he would like to retire and function alone as a teacher or some other common job (anything seems like baby play compared to cursing).

Along with that, I can see him in this case proposing to his s/o, wanting them to be in his life permanently and "officially" so to speak.

As for the children...I don't think he would want in the first place. He just doesn't see anyone he likes (he can barely stand his own students, my God), so he could be fine with an s/o who has that same opinion.

Did you see that Kusakabe has a sister named Usami? the one who was devastated by the death of her son so they gave her something similar to Panda.

I imagine that Kusakabe would take VERY much into account if his sister likes his s/o to continue the relationship, Usami is one of the few people he cares about and believes that it is appropriate to have his approval.

Can you imagine if Kusakabe had met his boyfriend through his sister? That would be nice

Probably his s/o is also one of the few people with whom he confides secrets like about his sister's son, I don't think he reveals important things about work, but he definitely lets his s/o know that it is for the greater good and especially for their safety.

I saw on the wiki that apparently he likes fishing, it would probably be a hobby that he normally likes to do alone, but if his s/o shows interest, he will try to teach them the basics in a decent way and have them form their own opinion about it.

He secretly hopes that they like it, but no pressure.

Kusakabe wants them to share the hobby because they both like it after all, he doesn't see the point in it being just to spend time together if they don't enjoy it :/

Now, going to the elephant in the room, a s/o sorcerer or part of the academy.

It would be more useful in the aspect of seeing each other often, since they would constantly see if their s/o is a teacher in Kyoto as well.

They could even do joint classes to teach their students an ear of tricks (and that way he doesn't have to give it all alone). ironically the students would respect the s/o more than their normal sensei.

Even if the s/o was from Tokyo, it's not that there would be a serious problem in seeing each other, they send him on missions nearby often, so they could take advantage and see each other after finishing work or better yet, go on missions together.

The problem would be that his more protective side comes to light, which is not necessarily bad, but it can be somewhat annoying.

always puts the s/o behind or does the work before the s/o can do his part, especially if it is a mid-grade curse.

which can be irritating because HELLO, they are of the SAME RANK, they are supposed to be able to do the same things.

Kusakabe should learn to stop being so scared when his sorcerer s/o goes on a mission with him and let them do their job.

Even if we're honest, after that phase, they make a good combo, especially if your s/o encourages you to get out of your comfort zone and not be so lazy.

It would be like the dynamics of "no energy" and "a lot of energy" in short.

He finds it adorable that they believe in him so much, but at the same time he thinks they should be less naïve before the world of Jujustu swallows them alive.

He still liked the idea of settling down, but in this situation it will have to be his s/o who takes the first step. It's a feeling.

In general, if you are one of the few people this man cares about, rest assured that he will not take your affection or your company for granted. He will appreciate it as much as he can and APPRECIATE you as much as he can.

He just wants to live another day. hopefully with you.

Shares, reglogs and comments are very welcome!

Thanks for the Request ❤️

#kusakabe atsuya #jjk kusakabe #Kusakabe #headcanons #neutral reader #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x y/n #jujutsu kaisen #jujustu kaisen #jujutsu no kaisen #kusakabe x reader

[crushedsweets]

Hey! I love your artwork! I think it’s beautiful!!!

I just wanted to ask, what would Toby and Natalie’s relationship be like if they were able to start dating? I’m genuinely curious.

P.S. LONG LIVE TICCIWORK AND NINAKATE!!!!!

HIIII OK I LIKE THIS OMG i cant believe i hadnt thought about it before. ok i spoke a lot more than i thought i would...all under the cut LOL omg..

okay so, like i mentioned, they would probably have some random drunk kiss one night. maybe a christmas party and nina brings in mistle toe and its stupid. maybe new years party and the clock strikes 12 and they were like 'fuck it why not'.

natalie would have to initiate a lot of the starting conversations and touches. toby grew up with people thinking he was some gross virus roaming around, with boys pushing him around and girls sneering at him, so he's really hesitant. and natalie does get upset pretty easily if toby tries doing things without her permission, even if its something like doing her laundry - he has to ask. and he always does

it would start off pretty awkward too... neither of them know what to say, and both of them are so stubborn with egos the size of the moon - their pride knows no bounds. but at times, toby's ego can morph into something more cocky and he'll say stupid shit. 'you wanna kiss me so bad i know it' 'oh should i get nina to buy some mistle toe again' 'if you wanted to spend the night you couldve just asked'. at first clocky would get mad and pissy, and toby would laugh at her, and they'd move on. but eventually instead of moving on, one of them would say something like 'well.... do you actually want to' and they would. awkwardly, of course. a kiss, laying in bed together, brushing eachothers hair, etc.

their most intimate moments probably happen in the kitchen. that's always been quite the place of love for toby, so to lean against a counter and bring natalie close and give her a kiss in the warmest room of the house while something good is cooking in the oven ... probably means a lot to him

i think they'd love hikes. theres a waterfall in my au that they'd go to often, strip down to their underwear, and sit under. they'd wrestle and splash water and laugh and eat some fruit they packed and fall asleep under the sun after hours of just fucking around. kisses constantly swap between sudden acts of passion and excitement, to a quiet, lazy, quick kiss while throwing a towel over their shoulder.

but of course, they are still difficult. toby's reckless and natalie is picky, so theres a lot of arguments that spring up from nothing. this would be a constant thing until one of them eventually cries - something neither of them are used to. that would probably be a tipping point for them to start really looking into being a better person for eachother. but that is not easy by any means and neither of them are capable of being perfect. at fucking all

their biggest issue would be close to their canon shit.. toby wants to stay, clocky wants to leave. run away from all the bullshit she got trapped in. clocky is more likely to truly just fuck off and leave toby behind, and that scares the everliving shit out of toby every day - he'd swap between 'i have to be so good she'll never leave' and 'you fucking asshole just leave already its inevitable theres nothing i can do to change it'. but clocky just wants to live a normal normal normal life. she wants to grow old with kids and a career and a nice dog and to make dinner every night. she wants her biggest problem to be the dog tracking in mud.

eventually toby settles down, and while he cant just walk away from slenderman, they figure something out. a shared apartment, toby gets closer to the farm owners and he starts working more often. clocky gets into tattooing. toby is the first person she ever tattoos on. they both have to compromise a lot, but they can't imagine doing this for (or with) anybody else

#ticciwork #creepypasta #ticci toby #clockwork #im embarrassed anytime i get mushy about characters omfg

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

hii sex witch

im 19 afab and ive never had sex before, i masturbate sometimes but ive never had an orgasm and dont know how to "get it"?.. im generally scared of sex and identified as asexual for a long time but i dont think thats really my deal, im just scared of it. im scared of it being awkward, of my partner not finding me atractive or worse. i dont like how i look naked, and dont imagine anyone ever could. i think my vagina and my boobs look ugly and alien, i preach body positivity and being natural i think all bodies are good no matter how they look but when im faced with the reality of my own body im repulsed by these parts of it. i think something may be broken inside me because i just cant Be Normal about sex, the thought of me having it always makes me stressed and uncomfortable. i want a relationship and i love meeting new people and flirting etc. but when the person i talk to makes any sexual joke or innuendo i get super tense and scared and realise that if things get further they would probably want me to do it... and maybe i could and maybe i even want to but the thought makes me sick with the pressure. this isnt even a question, so i dont know how you could even respond but i dont have anyone i could openly talk about this in my life without feeling super weird or them just brushing it off as "you'll grow up to it" or something, and i just had to say it to someone or else i will eventually explode. hope this all makes sense ❤️‍🩹

hey anon,

come in, get cozy, grab a glass of lemonade, etc. we're gonna be here a minute.

so listen: I swear to GOD this isn't me trying to pull the "you'll grow into it" thing. I am going somewhere different with this I swear. bear with me.

first and foremost, I think the main problem you're experiencing right now is that being 19. I don't mean that in a condescending or belittling way, or to imply that you just don't want to have sex because you're 19. I'm saying that being 19 (and 18, and 20, and 21, and so on) is mostly for being worried about everything and having no idea what's going on. you have to get all that insane anxiety out of your system as early as possible in your adult years so that you can get down to business actually developing a perspective and figuring out what you want to do. I'm not even, like, a LOT older than you but trust me, by the time you're 26 you're going to feel SOOOOO different about things that you don't even realize you have an opinion about right now. when I was 19 I was made pretty much exclusively of anxiety and the cheapest bagels at the grocery store. (eating badly was not helping my anxiety.)

what I'm getting at here is that you're at like a very exciting and terrible formative age when it's the most normal thing in the world to feel like there's something uniquely awful and hideous and unlovable about yourself. when I was 19 the two most important things in the world to me were losing my virginity (lmao) and making sure I never experienced actual emotional intimacy ever because I was sure that if anyone got close enough to really know me they would realize that I was the worst person who ever lived and fundamentally undeserving of human connection. TERRIBLE place to be in; I had a lot of deeply bad and uncomfortable sex because of it.

there's a really easy solution to being terrified of sex, which I wish someone had told me when I was very scared of sex, and it's if having sex sounds like a horrific ordeal you can actually just Not Have Sex. just don't do it. it's actually REALLY easy to not have sex; millions of people do it every single day.

if you like meeting people and flirting, that's awesome! you should do that, having connections and relationships with other people is important. if you don't like sexual jokes and innuendos you can just tell people they make you uncomfortable and ask them not to do that; how they respond is actually a GREAT litmus test for whether or not those are people you should keep hanging out with. if someone isn't able to not make sexual comments about you after you've asked them not to, kick 'em to the curb!

there are tons of people in all kinds of romantic relationships who aren't having sex. that's a perfectly fine and reasonable boundary to set. it can make things a little more complicated, sure, but dating and romance and love are all complicated and messy anyway. again, great way to VERY EFFICIENTLY weed out who is and isn't a suitable potential partner. (it's also fine to not want a partner, either; there's nothing wrong with being a sociable extrovert who doesn't want to have sex.)

there's nothing broken about you for being nervous about the idea of having sex. whether you identify as asexual or not, it's perfectly fine to feel that way. it's completely fine if you change your mind tomorrow or if you feel this way for the rest of your life. and you might! maybe sex will never sound awesome for you, and that's fine! again, tons of people living very good and happy lives every day without having sex! sex isn't a measure of maturity, but knowing yourself well enough to honor your own boundaries and desires is.

I hope a kinder attitude towards your own body can come with time, and I think it will. be gentle with yourself, alright? being 19 is very silly but unfortunately very necessary, and I think you'll really like what comes after if you let yourself relax a little. whatever you feel like right now, you're actually a very normal person, by which I of course mean you have a rich and brilliant mind and will do many quietly wonderful things in your life and will be deserving of every bit of love and joy that comes your way.

also, hey - have you ever seen a therapist about anxiety? I also should have done that when I was 19.

#sex edventures 2023

[ganondoodle]

so, i have thought more about what we now know about botw2 and honestly, setting aside the smaller things i am not a fan of (like the building aspect) my biggest gripes about it are the plot looking like its gonna be very generic, especially regarding ganondorf, while i hoped it would perhaps finally give us a little more interesting take instead good vs evil; and the oh so mysterious figure you see in in the trailer very likely to be hylia, since shes mentioned constantly in the first game (among other things like her design being pretty much a carbon copy of zelda for the most boring reasons imaginable)

and no its not just bc of my stupid little fanworks (that i do bc i love the franchise, as much as i am critical of it, it comes from being very passionate about it, hence me working my fan lore around the canon so it doesnt disturb it much, its more meant to expand it on parts i think are a little lacking without me trying to sound superior, literally just as an act of love (and a little spite ill admit that) to add something to it)- BUT bc i have little hope they would do anything more than just going full blown "this monstrous beast is pure inherently evil, and this is the pure inherently good white little girl goddess whos just protecting her god given perfect and unshakable good tm monarchy" with no little to no nuance (theres also alot more to be critical of the general structure and implications like racism, orientalism, nationalism, that while i can see alot of wrong or questionable things in the games i lack the eloquence to talk about in its full range) yes i am personally biased bc i just .. hate that kind of story/worldbuilding structure, but i dont think im the only one who would think of it as boring and .. disappointing?

i dont need ganondorf to be redeemed, i dont need him to be the good himbo bf that some people think all ganondorf stans want, i just want him to be more than to shout "i will conquor this kingdom bc i am evil and want it" and send a horde of monsters after you, at the very least id want the game to just aknowledge that there must be a reason for it, why it turned out like this

the zelda series and its world has so much potential, which is probably a reason for its popularity in fanworks, but also keeps not using it, no i dont expect a company like nintendo to deliver on all my hopes, of course not, im not that delusional, but the further i think and learn about this universe and concepts they created i find myself asking "why" more and more where the games never elaborate, never question

i like a clear structure, i like when your choices dont have a big or any impact on the story bc i want to live the story, not worry about every decision like i already do every second of my life IRL, i want to partake in a movie, in a theater piece i can influence the pace of but not change the outcome, yet i feel kind of ... ignored? let down? asking why and how, how do they know this is right and this is wrong, how do they keep enacting this seeing it never works out, keep saying defeat this evil, but evil yet returns stronger than before over and over, how do they never ask "is this the right way?", they say "we need to kill it more next time"

i know they are fictional little characters made up to sell a game, with a convevient plot point to ever repeat the same structure, but it cant be wrong to say "i love this world, i want to see and know more, i want to see it grow and change, break the cycle and be better, show me characters not puppets"

theres very surely nuances and ideas i am sorely missing bc i lack the knowledge of japanese as a language, culture, and mythology, but i dont think it invalidates all that i feel for it ..

.. right?

#ganondoodles talks #botw2 #tloz totk #rambling #long post #just to comment on the building aspect again #i think i dislike it so much bc it feels like the zelda world might be heading towards a too modern one #i dont like how alot of series of all entertainment treat industrialization as inevitable #that every world will have cars and planes and phones the way we have #botw took some modern concepts and very elegantly remade them into something that fits and doesnt feel out of place #maybe im just boring #maybe i just dont like alot about the world we live in and it pains me to see the escapist relief of it be turned into a copy of it #maybe im just autistic and think too much about stuff that doesnt matter #lmao #or something

[bowserssupermariopartylaugh]

rambles about my messy af bowuigi yoshi's island au thing, at the "behest" of @maxium-defense-luigi i have more bits and bobs but tried to "summarize" the vague major points and failed 😭

Basically, it's yoshi's island's premise where kamek kidnaps baby luigi, but ends up taking him in as his ward. So now bowser and luigi grow up together and become each other's best friend.

But remember, kid mario and the yoshies are still looking for luigi. When they finally manage to defeat kamek, they take luigi with them, to "rescue" him. But, for the most part, what they've done is tear luigi away from the only family he's ever known.

And taken away Bowser's only friend.

From here, the story can somewhat fall in line with the movie premise. In that, the yoshies hide the human children away, sending them to a world where they better blend in. A world no one else seems to know of.

But kamek doesn't know that. He wages a war against the yoshies, razing their island in search of luigi. To no avail. He extends his search to other kingdoms, and Bowser grows up knowing only that luigi was taken from him—

—and that he /despises/ the boy in the red cap.

Moving forward in time to when bowser ascends to the throne, you can only imagine how someone like bowser only doubles the search efforts. He tears through kingdom to kingdom in search of luigi, and leaves destruction in his wake. He gains a reputation as a war monger, the world fears him, and he intends to keep it that way.

Until the day bowser's troops capture a human fumbling through the kingdom. Because bowser's hopes and dreams of a happy reunion with his invaluable friend are instantly dashed when luigi /doesn't remember him./ All Luigi seems to do is cower from bowser as if he were a dangerous beast, who won't let luigi go back home, and luigi /doesn't want to stay./

But bowser has gone his whole life looking for luigi, to have him by his side /always,/ and he won't let go without a fight.

Luigi seems real preoccupied with running back to some "Mario" guy, and lo and behold, bowser's scouts discover that the stubborn mushroom kingdom has also received a visitor.

A man in a /red cap./

The main timeline difference here is that in yoshis island, you rescue luigi relatively quickly. But in order for the au to work, the yoshies cant find and rescue luigi until he's been missing for like a few years. Oof.

Theres so many tropes i wanna cram into this thing likeee. I love to imagine that bowser has basically gastby'd luigi, ykno? Where luigi, like daisy, has almost become more of a concept than an actual person in bowser's head. And that luigi would just conveniently not care about bowser having terrorized numerous kingdoms for "luigi's" sake, and that he'd just /agree/ to stay with bowser forever and ever etc. even tho its completely unrealistic and frankly ridiculous

Ive made a short post about this before, where i wanted to explain that i would want to do these different phases of their lives as separate parts, so that I could focus on the different stages and their different tones without it seeming too disjointed for one story. Like i rly wanna dedicate a whole story just to kid bowuigi bc guh theyre so precious 😭

And clearly i want to cram beauty and the beast in there. I love the idea of bowser instantly crushing on now-adult luigi, but he can't make any progress bc bowser has also let himself degrade into the monster the world views him as.

Its also fun to consider this like, thing of how /kamek/ was the one who started this thing of marking the yoshies as mortal enemies of the koopas, moreso than any other kingdom or race. And so bowser grows up in a kingdom at war, and just kinda absorbs that mentality and those practices. It's kinda all he knows.

(It also just doesn't help that kid bowser was HELLA traumatized by having luigi kidnapped from his own home /right in front of him,/ as kamek hid them both together in a saferoom. Likewise, luigi is def fucked up from being kidnapped but whereas bowser explodes from all of his issues, luigi is a perfect embodiment of repressed/suppressed trauma. 🥲)

And remember, mario was basically raised a la tarzan by the yoshies (hell yeah feral jungle boy mario), and luigi is mario's brother. So now there's these two heavily feuding groups, and bowser goes and falls for someone he shouldn't associate with. Yes, it's romeo and juliet, dammit.

I have yet to watch howl's moving castle but (excuse me if im butchering your special interest 😭), i feel like this plot is also vaguely similar to that movie.

Its just fun. Like. Luigi's kidnapped as a baby by the bad guys, the good guys rescue him after like five years but it's basically kidnapping at this point, so whos in the right and whos in the wrong, etc

Ugh this is why i dont write this story lmao, im trying too hard 💀💀💀 this idea has clearly been rotting in my head too long and getting out of hand 😵‍💫

#my brainrot #bowuigi #au #yoshis island #smw2 #hcs #my wiritng #fic ideas

[onlyjaeyun]

I have so much to say but I NEED to say this…

I saw you said that a lot of people wanted you to have Snowflake be strict with Hoon.

But… the scene you wrote…

It was perfect.

I never wanted that (the “strictness”) I’ll be honest. I never wanted her to be super hard on Hoon… And truly when you have been in relationships with real people…well. They aren’t perfect. They mess up. You mess up. And it’s not ideal sometimes.

The scene you wrote was literally so perfect. Flawless. It was absolutely excellent. It was real. Raw. Beautiful. Sometimes you just get too tired…sometimes you just don’t want to wait anymore to be happy.

Sometimes the person you love does something wrong. And you don’t need to make them wait for forgiveness. You don’t need to make them earn it. In a relationship YOU will inevitably do something wrong too… Can you imagine how terrible it would be to have your remorse and genuine apology met with a list of requirements—after you have both suffered…

No…that isn’t what anyone really wants in a relationship. And it certainly wouldn’t have fit Snowflake and Hoon because…at the end of the day there is real and abiding love between them…and doing all of that…it isn’t who they are. After spending so long pretending that they aren’t each other’s person… the punishment has already been delivered. They had to live without each other for 10 years. No one is promised tomorrow. Life changes and takes and gives without warning.

I wouldn’t waste another second away from my soulmate by having him atone… What purpose would it serve? She knows his heart already.

Life is its own atonement. It is already hard without us making it harder.

True love is such a gift and theirs was so strong that it survived 10 years of them trying to kill it.

No. I’m glad you chose to do it the way you did. Because real love isn’t about “being strict”…and “making sure he pays for what he did”… Forgive me but… such things are often petty and immature…

It’s about healing and restoration and moving forward and changing and growing for the better… and it was all there in that absolutely perfect scene you wrote.

Don’t bother with what people want from you Zadie—or what their expectations are of the story you want to tell. Those are you characters. You know them. You love them. And your instincts as a storyteller—as someone who understands people—are unparalleled. I’m so glad you followed your heart on this.

viola, my love, my partner in crime, my ride or die, my adoptive older tumblr sister ☹️🤍

you never fail to make me tear up with your asks and feedback and basically everything you text me and i cant evenr thank you enough for it. your support is literally everything to me and i hope you know you've helped me through some tough times on here 🥺🤍😭✨

it always feels like you know exactly what to say to esde all those worries in my head because i was definitely worrying about if i had made the right decisions, so reading this definitely made me feel even more secure in my decisions and choices.

i wholeheartedly agree with everytjing you've said and i honestly couldnt have said it better bc you always hit the nail on the head with your analysis. this is bery important to people who have doubted CH!hoonyn's reactions and the development in their relationship so thank you for putting it into words and tkaing that burden off of my shoulders.

i love and appreciate you so so much 🤍

#; mailbox 📬 #; cold hearts

[loafbud]

how naive i was to assume not having a job/no college for 7 years after highschool graduation would give me enough freedom to feel inspired, live life and pursue my creative endeavors

it's made me the complete opposite

lazy, uninspired to take action, sleepy, not mentally stimulated...

im here wondering why my life's been so stagnant, why i missed out on having "core experiences" in my early 20s (having irl friends/a job/house/etc, going out to travel, etc), feeling like the world's spinning and its leaving me behind, like its already too late for me to do anything to enjoy life

I have creative projects i just..... sat on, let them live in my head and imagination for years, that I haven't acted on yet because i..... idek the reason, its like this:

i have all the mental energy to get hyped about my projects, freely imagine them in my head, seeing a future for those ideas- but in terms of actually doing it??? im just unable to have the physical drive to pursue those.

so when ppl tell me to "get up and just do it already- dont think, just do or else you'll never make progress"..... it doesn't motivate me, neither does it actually get me excited to do it

if you were to tell me "hey vinyl, u graduated hs now time to go to college!!" in the years immediately after graduation, id fucking cringe and just lock myself in the room.. hs was a hellscape that socially negatively affected my mental health, so my introverted ass going thru another academia experience with social anxiety & being around the same kind of energy was the last thing on my mind

but now that I've wasted my early 20s doing nothing with my life, I finally realize what i need to do to make it out

and after 7 years missing out life, when i think about doing (online) college, i actually get fucking excited??? in a good way?????? i cant wait to fuckin flip thru textbooks and take notes bro, to (for the first time in my life) set myself a schedule and actually take academics seriously, to have fully online asynchronous courses so i could learn at my own pace

to finally give my life that work/play balance. because 7 years of my life's been nothing but 100% play (ex: doing hobbies, gaming, lazing around, sleeping, etc), and i have no one but myself to blame for that

(i know i mentioned me finally choosing to go to a community college weeks ago, i still haven't applied yet but i will before the year ends lmao- i just dont wanna rush into it, i wanna prepare)

....but then idk,, to say 7 years of my life was a complete and utter joke/huge waste isn't entirely true... im constantly learning about myself and those years definitely played a big part in my self-discovery and just see how my beliefs have changed thru time

uhhh yeah

tl;dr- as a 25-year-old artist with 7+ years of a no work/no school life + living w/ my parents my whole life, I've gotten absolutely zero shit done on creative projects and no forward progress in my life in general, so im going into my college/work era

the position I've been in for those years helped me grow as a person internally, but this era i was in has already served its purpose so its time for me to start a new chapter or smthn

#rant #ramble

[shock]

I was looking at the comments on that one post i added onto dying at how sketchy people think it is for a young person to be in a field where young people are necessary and vital to bridging the gap between young students and older staff. for change to happen in places of learning you need people who understand the role technology has on students and culture and is able to translate and engage in a way that betters a community 🤣

I don't even have a teaching degree, im a BA social worker and im pursuing a masters degree in education with a concentration in diversity and equity. it is beyond heartbreaking and disgusting that the immediate assumption people who are too online for their own good and are so wrapped up in online community age politics have when I talk about how much I care about and respect my students and children in general, and how being a part of my local community means caring about and seeing how they contribute. I do plenty of stuff with just adults, I have my own gatherings and events and my own social life outside of my students, but I spend a significant amount of my waking hours with them, they are people I have to know how to communicate with and see their perspectives and model for them how to use what they already know and try to do it better.

My position is mobile. I go into a lot of classes, im in the hallways, im in detention spaces, im in the lunch rooms, i run groups, i have students in my office. I tell yo mama jokes with kids to model how a good joke should disarm and add joy, not be told to our students with dead mothers to hurt them, and because it's fun. I play basketball with them to model how an adult can be worse than they are at something and not make it a power struggle, and because its fun. I walk the mile with them if they're having a rough day to support them, to show them its possible, and because its fun. I bring in my own rock collection to give them an experience, to teach them responsibility, and because its fun. I sit in classes for lectures and raise my hand to ask questions to model behavior, and because it's fun to learn. I spend 9 hours a day with them, why should I spend that not engaging with them as fully as I can? They have things to teach me, im always learning, that's how a community works. Everyone teaches everyone.

I go to the grocery store and am excited to see my kids and their families. I have relationships with parents, community leaders (both children and adults, because yes, children can be community leaders and they need adults to help them learn to do well and do safely what they're passionate about), and a lot of my coworkers are the age where they have their own children who come over to my house, from the youngest being an 8 month old baby, all the way up to 18 who needs to see adults closer to her age being happy and successful, not even including the adult children of my colleagues. I'm the same age as many of them.

I live in a community and I worked hard to get here. Young people work in communities and it's not unusual. I have many coworkers who are 20-22, and they're great teachers with great mentors.

It's not weirdly young, it's not unusual to play games with and be involved with the lives of my students while also setting appropriate boundaries, and comments like this so often scream "I hate kids/don't want to be around kids/don't see kids as people and cant imagine why anyone would without a sick ulterior motive" more than they scream "I want to protect kids". If you want to live in a community that is healthy, productive, vibrant, ever-growing, and healing, how can you do that if you don't put time and energy into the future of your community? I spend a significant amount of time protecting kids from abuse, helping them process abuse, helping them heal from trauma, and teaching them how to know their worth and I help them have a voice the times a teacher DOES treat them unfairly. I am their voice at staff meetings because they can't be there.

Kids used to annoy me, scare me, freak me out, and I never wanted to interact with them. For me, healing that mindset involved examining my trauma on my own, and understanding that all of that hatred came from jealousy at the ability to have a normal childhood and a fear that I would hurt kids around me by existing near them because of how much my mother hurt me so deeply. I thought I could never be a parent because I would hurt the way she hurt me. I thought I would ruin joy and love. I healed that hurt, saw the positive impacts I made, and I don't need to feel jealous when childhood actually doesn't end when you are able to be invited into the games they play, have inside jokes, get pranked, prank the kids, prank staff, and experience it authentically. The work is hard and you have to learn when to be serious and when to speak their language, but it's not an either/or. It's both. Same goes for older people, if you care about community you should learn to engage with people who arent your own age.

Change isn't done by someone who wakes up one day at 30 and decides to do that, it starts by telling kids that they matter and that there are things about being a kid that are special and important for everyone so that they don't lose that and become jaded, miserable adults who feel like they have nothing to live for like I was for too long.

#yes this is okay to reblog

[lasarcasticpanda]

so on an adjacent side to the "villain" motivation for this movie, there's the motivation for the many Spiders and why they expect Miles to allow his "canon-event" to play out. because my friend mentioned how peter wouldn't just allow or expect that.

but i think peter would. peter b parker is the one we've gotten the most exposure to in this setting, so:

like, this dude has been a hero for so long, alone. experienced love, hero-worship (from both others and himself, worshipping his job), burn out, burying his aunt, divorcing his love, and the loss of that drive for this hero thing, all alone.

and he did the peter parker thing and he kept going and he kept to himself and he kept on keeping on. even as his world shattered and he seemingly lost all control on it. like, IMAGINE. you constantly put the good of others before anything for yourself, you are constantly trying to do right by the one person you couldn't save who helped you on this path, you still cant save everyone but you try, and you're still alone.

and then Miles happens and the whole elite squad happens and he learns about canon events.

and he learns that uncle ben was always going to die, he was apparently necessary to die for spiderman to happen.

his greatest failure was always inevitable. can you imagine the weight of that guilt lifting, even only slightly, from someone who experienced all of this? there was nothing to do to save ben, because his death gave birth to spiderman, and in turn saved countless more.

it's the first loss of control that allows him to breathe. and all peter parkers most likely feel this lift, feels this touch their deepest grief, because of course they all carry this like a second skin.

it's incorrect of course - not completely, not in the metaphorical sense that "terrible things happen but you learn and grow" kinda way, but in the concept that spiderman wouldn't exist without uncle ben way. (Terrible things happening and having to move on despite those things is not a spiderman thing, it's not even a hero thing, it's a life thing).

spiderman exists because the people who get the power choose to do so. peter parker, when bitten, will always choose that path, regardless of how he figures that out- uncle ben dying is not needed for that, its just one way.

in the one universe where gwen gets bitten instead, when she lives and gets the powers, she chooses to do so, even before her peter dies.

in the anomaly situation, one outside of the canon events and expectations, miles gets bitten and chooses to be spiderman. he chose that before his uncle's death, he actively chose this against his fear.

that is what makes spiderman. the choice.

the question Miles lobs at peter, "you're saying you wouldn't save uncle ben if you knew", is exactly it, it knocks that quiet complacency on its ass.

of course peter would've tried to save uncle ben if he knew, he tried to save him when he didn't. all Peter's did, across all universes. its what defines spiderman, not because uncle ben died, but because peter still tried.

loss shapes us, it does - it changes us, it can strip us bare and force us to move. but it doesn't create a new us, we have to do that part.

assigning the existence of spiderman solely to uncle bens death is a disservice to the person who actually wears the mask. which, again, very peter parker, sanding down the good you do and the good you are to punish yourself silently.

there is no reward for silent suffering.

Miles' refusal to do so, his refusal to accept this status quo simply because someone told him it's what must happen, is the most spiderman thing done the entire film. because spiderman might not be able to save everyone, but he will never stop trying.

but man, the appeal of accepting that "these awful things are supposed to happen, so i could never have saved them" idea after so long going at it alone would be hard to resist, especially when good things start creeping up again (because peter CHOSE to chase them, because he chose to try is a quiet thing, acknowledged only between miles and peter "i wanted her to be like you, i met you and chose to try for happiness again").

and so much of this is quiet context! this is just my perspective, one way to take that in and call bullshit on the whole thing but find immense sympathy in wanting to fall in line, but it makes such brilliant use of the casual and die-hards knowledge of peter parker as a character.

spiderman is such a sympathetic hero and character and this movie does a brilliant job of painting everyone with a level of sympathy, of understanding, even when we don't agree, even when they're wrong.

#spiderverse spoilers #spoilers #across the spiderverse #ITS ALL ABOUT CHOICE IT ALWAYS HAS BEEN #peter has always chosen to be kind! and sympathetic! and spiderman! #he has not always succeeded because its HARD and hes such an angry dude and we get it and he TRIES ALWAYS #idek if this makes sense its 3am and i was thinking about character motivations again

[bentosandbox]

More sporadic Lone Trail ramblings/TLs

prev one here this time more about the saria/kirsten/mumu trio and fanservice and the CGs in general spoiler warning etc etc

1

(From 4-END) Silence asks Saria if she's incapable of standing against Rhine Lab because deep inside she's the same as them and when she finally answers she's like

......I'm sorry, Silence. I did think about it thoroughly, but I can't give you a definitive answer. If Kirsten's experiment does touch a law that should not have been, then I will stop her, just like all the mistakes Rhine Lab has committed over the years-- they ought to be corrected, for I have always believed, the more power one holds, the less they should act recklessly. But if I were to go back in time, to the moment where Kirsten and I first met, when everything had yet to transpire...I would not have stopped her then, nor the birth of Rhine Lab. Yes, even if I knew that Rhine Lab would create this many Catastrophes, even if I could have predicted that Kirsten, Parvis and Ferdinand would eventually grow out of control-- I would still have stood together with them as I did.

(From 5-END) Mumu:

Did you know? Back then, Saria and I even picked out Kirsten's clothes. Yup, Saria cares about fashion more than she does! (Control truly only has 1[or 2 lol] things in her brain)

Yara (HR and the one responsible for Silence2's outfit) is basically kind of a parent figure to Kirsten 🥹 (so I guess they're a parallel to Silence and Iffy...)

uhm what else. the 3 of them used to go stargazing together and in a flashback mumu picks up a (shiny) rock

Mumu: Kirsten, see that rock on the ground? What does it look like? Kirsten: ...... Mumu: It's like Saria, right? It's so hard(like, firm) and yet it shines so 'perfectly'! Kirsten: ...Like the stars.

idk how global is going to do this part but in CN (and in JP?) Rhine Lab is literally 'Rhine Life' and mumu asks if Kirsten really wants to name it that instead of something like 'Rhine Physics' since she 'just wants to fly to the sky' and she says no, RL is good, because

I want to know what exactly are the stars we see. I want to know what lies beyond the barrier wrapping around us. I want to know...to see just what kind of land do we live in, if I can really take a look while standing among the stars.......Most of the answers I want are about 'us'.

oh one last one quote out of context for you fic writers Saria (to mumu): You're the same as always. The moment you get a little nervous, you forget just how frail your body is.

2

Love the idea of mumu being doc's bestie/oomfie but her and hol's lines/whatever else have irreparably damaged the AK ecosystem fr tbqhwyf and i thought skadol was bad lol. Now we'll have triple the NTR jokes great amazing wonderful (i launch myself into space)

'But its rationalized they're all the last of their kind!!!!' Justification doesn't fucking matter the damage has been done to their (perceived) characters i want my insane morally fucked up scientists not some generic lonely gf that steals the mc from other girls or some harem bullshit forgot what the term was and i dont want to know

Imagine getting a generic ass cg of 'pov mumu is so sad and helpless and needs your help to rescue her!!' (this happens after and not getting one for the extremely kino saria and mumu fight where you find out more about just how inter-connected the 3 of them were (are…?) and saria is first overwhelmed by all the water and she remarks how shes has never seen water(from mm) this turbulent before but within the waves she cant find the elf and all she finds is are sad eyes and tears…I can only feel pity for Mumu fans who don't give a damn about shipping themselves for her. speaking of CGs...

3

AK is clearly inspired and references a lot of IRL media and it shows with their graphic design work (UI, motion graphics etc) here's a link to a Lone Trail analysis but....for some reason the story CGs are quite bereft of the same energy (dare i say passion even lol) imo

ofc CGs are to immerse you in the story etc etc and they're really pretty but

how immersive is a fucking practically copypasted photobashed kirsten (the CG is very beautiful otherwise I love aZling4's rendering style sm.. probably my second favourite CG after the depressing 2nd lobby one you get post-ST4 where......shes also in the same pose.........motherfuckers)

Like man could you not have posed him any other way than hand in pocket with average cosplayer photoshoot lighting

this CG of hol almost getting rekt by saria is pretty weak imo that grip is non-existent nothing much to say (atm) about hol but that i love fanart where she looks/acts like a freak instead of (90% of fanart)

saria literally just fell from almost space back to earth and she looks almost unscathed lol mumu's water can't possibly be that rejuvenating

Maybe it's meant to be kind of incomprehensible but uh when the story went tonight the truth is finally glimpsed by humans for the first time or something I was like ....what is even happening in this picture lol

idk like doing partitioned CGs like how limbus does it would be so good tbh sometimes all they just show is a face and its like ? all that space? I'm guessing the artists have to do the concept/compositions themselves and some just have fresher ideas than others or time constraints etc basically i would just love to see CGs that are references to kino movie shots or something, they love movies so much right??? what about some good cinematography????

Dont want to sound like im flexing my useless veterans card or whatever but like. im a day 0 fan, i played their OBT, i started my acc on day 1, i remember being so excited about this game being so different from the other mobages, i didn't like how GFL was becoming way way more fanservicey then so AK was like a literal noah's ark with a whole bunch of artists ive revered from my touhou days, and now seeing it (inevitably!) slide towards GFL and the average mobage has me like 'well im glad limbus exists they let their women wear pants and be irredeemably insane(looking at you talulah 🥲)'

regardless of all that complaining this might beat italiano perros for favourite event because i was one of those kids with a space phase and something about the trio's dynamic.... (brain chugging) something about water unable to move unshakeable earth (but it can soften though...) that in turn can never reach the sky you know you know just like how a tiger can never be on the same level as a dragon 'real' animal vs mythical

#arknights #bentotexto #Lone Trail

[sketching-shark]

Man, zhu bajie n tang sanzang had to b up there w swk about their mischaracterization n hated in lmk fandom

I have never seen so much mishandling as i seen with those three characters 😭😭(like bro i get that the most noticeable arc that ppl retain is the white bone spirit arc bc of OSP BUT THEY DIDNT STUCK TO THAT CHARACTERISTICS IN THE LATER ARCS LIKE CMON NOW—bajie couldn’t even lie about the dragon piss medicine in a later arc, what makes yall think he’s always a fantastic liar. Theres some benefit to his lying but they also backfire. BAJIE DO END UP LIKING EVERYONE LIKE HE REFER TO SWK AS ELDER BROTHER!<- no man could ever live up to the wonder of zhu wuneng. He just sweet n he does get a fantastic arc in the novel!

Tang sanzang does have some(albeit rare moments where hes nice but his asshoole moments sometimes intertwined) where hes like “yea my disciples r greats but theyre mad ugly.” Or that he gets better at having more trust in his disciples besides zhu wuneng. Even if its followed by hella traumatizing moments that no human person would remain sane like that. <hes just barely holding on by his faith, his mission and his disciples. Not his horse bc he cant hold on to save his life but that character arc where he DIDNT FELL OFF THOO!>

Monkie Kid spoilers below

Hmmm I know about the Sun Wukong & Tang Sanzang dunking but is that happening with Zhu Bajie too? Have to say I find that a little surprising given that (if memory serves correctly) Monkie Kid did say Zhu Bajie's main fault (well besides the whole being a man-eating yaoguai thing) was being stubborn, but then lego Patriarch Subodhi said he became one of the hardest workers of the pilgrimage. I guess I was under the impression that people were more light on their criticisms and thoughts about Zhu Bajie, but maybe that's just because he doesn't seem to be a point of great interest in the lego show fandom lol.

Kind of funny story anon but I've been vicariously growing in awareness on how much Zhu Bajie is loved in China through @antidotefortheawkward's posts about the pigman. And yeah, I can see that being in large part because Xiyouji in its totality does give a very different impression of who these characters are and where they end up than a cartoony summary can provide. As a number of people on this site have noted for example, the White Bone Demon Arc can be understood in a much more complex light than "Tang Sanzang & Zhu Bajie hurt poor monkey for nothing" when placed in the context of it being more near the beginning of the journey when the pilgrims were still grating against each other a lot & it happening very soon after the whole debacle with the Ginseng fruit tree. Here after all you can see how the monk has a recent history of getting into serious trouble from the monkey lying and being quick to destruction, so he would be primed to not believe SWK, not to mention he does hesitate to use the headband against SWK more than many give him credit for here. And YEAH given all the things they go through together I am more willing to accept a Sun Wukong and Zhu Bajie enemies to friends arc than that put on many another character.

Also LMAOOOOO Tang Sanzang DOES seem to have quite a few lines where he tries to comfort terrified individuals by telling them that the pilgrims are good people even with their rancid looks (ugly pilgrim rights <3). And oh dang anon you are so right about how even if Tang Sanzang is much more of a static character in comparison to SWK it's kind of a shame more attention isn't given to the series of horrifying events he goes through and what effect that would have on him so that he gets a little more depth than "weepy monk who's mean to the Monkey King & falls off his dragon horse" in the popular western imagination. But then again I can understand why the monk's trauma is largely downplayed in western cartoony retellings, given that said lighthearted cartoony retellings probably wouldn't be the best medium to even touch on stuff like human butchery, death threats, sexual assault, and the consequences thereof.

#anon answered #monkey critical #journey to the west #sa mention