#but that's a can of worms i'll open later

[purplink8]

Can I be real for a second? I don't think L giving a foot massage to Light was very in-character of him. Like manga!L would've totally scoffed at how pathetic anime!L appeared when he did that.

I like the rain scene bc it's really pretty (also Light MOANS bc of L? *sighs* yeah i ship lawlight) but I'm always so ?? at anime!L's behavior? The anime made L way too melancholic and y'know self-deprecating kinda guy. In contrast, manga!L (whom I love to death) is so so confident in doing what he's doing and has the time of his life during the Kira case as he's intellectually challenged (by Light) as he figures out the case little by little.

I don't get where the anime creators got the idea that L is a very sad character who cares about justice so much so that he's actually Justice itself? Manga!L enjoys solving cases. I'm not saying that L doesn't care about justice at all- just that he cares more about winning.

So, the anime creators looked at a character who cares about winning (& his own ego) than everything else and decided to... make him give a foot massage to his nemesis (surprise surprise bible symbolism featuring L as Jesus *🤮* coming up) apparently due to accepting Light's (boy's first debut as Judas) 'betrayal' how can there be betrayal when there was no trust between them in the first place and saying "It is the least I can do to atone for my sins"...

The only way I could've made a little sense of this is if L was mocking Kira with that line but the anime just had to go above & beyond to make it (L's actions) seem too genuine for that to be true. which is. so. FRUSTRATING

Manga!L wouldn't have done anything like that. Not even ironically (he'd have thought it to be below him for pretending to be accepting his defeat mockingly to Kira). Even Manga!L's not enough of a bastard to try to compare himself with Jesus (and just after knowing (god knows how) that he's going to die)- like that's too stupid omg: even for a mockery.

Does he actually think that Light would pick up on the (him as Jesus) symbolism and be like 'oh no! L is too noble like Jesus to die by my betrayal i'm such a bad judas how come i NEVER NOTICED THIS BEFORE'... and decide to spare L's life? Or embrace his inner Judas like the bad bitch he is and finish L for that godawful mockery of Jesus?

Whenever I think about Anime!Light's in-character reaction I crack up as it would be smth like 'wow this guy who graduated summa cum laude from torture university is pretending to be Jesus? lol what a real piece of work. would've expected better from you L: so pathetic lmao i hope rem kills you soon i'm so done with you rn- rip 💀'

Manga!L (if he knew he were going to die (don't know how that's possible in the anime; still we're talking about how the anime creators seem to see L as Jesus so ~anything is possible~) that is) would never go 'guess i'll die' accept his defeat offering a foot massage to his enemy and inwardly throw a pity party being all "… It'll be lonely, won't it?" GIRL you were the one going on & about how you'd EXECUTE Kira once you catch him on live tv (also saying that you'd bring Kira's head to the task force) I REALLY doubt you'd feel lonely if either one of you were to die- that (killing each other) was the point!!

Manga!L is a selfish character: he values his victory above all else so the anime making him accept defeat that easily + gracefully doesn't sit well with me.

#death note #l lawliet #light yagami #manga vs anime #manga!L #anime!L #anime!Light #the rain scene #the foot massage scene #yes i ship lawlight; no i don't think the rain scene was very faithful to L's character in the manga; yes we exist #as you can see i rlly RLLY don't like anime's take on L: i prefer the og manga!L :) #anime!L just isn't my cup of tea #manga!L's confidence in his assholery is much rather appreciated #i keep thinking about how i don't like certain parts of dn anime: the first of which being this rain scene #the second being how the anime handles Sayu's kidnapping and Light's reaction to it #but that's a can of worms i'll open later #i can't shut up apparently so here's a teaser: Light wouldn't have MURDERED Sayu OH MY GOD READ THE GODDAMN MANGA #in which he bends over backwards to protect her! and succeeds!! (at the cost of losing the death note to Mello) would you look at that?? #yeah i'm aware anime!Light doesn't kill Sayu but the way he's shown seriously considering it #(and choosing to let her live only so as to not increase suspicion) #leaves me so ANGRY #SAYU MEANS A LOT TO LIGHT OK? #he would not fucking do that #aaaaand....end rant #p #my meta #sorta #100

[unopenablebox]

my boss sent out a thing last night like "does anyone want to write a review article for this journal" and i was like "on the one hand, yeah possibly, on the other hand i'm a wretched incompetent and presumably can't be trusted with such a task"

and then i met with her today and she was like "yeah i was just going to offer it to you directly but i figured i'd see if anyone else felt like it. really i think you should do it though because your project is the best suited for the subject and you're unusually good at reading papers and writing"

so you know. that's good

#i think it will be an exhausting process ultimately probably #but good for me to publish Something Somewhere i guess #i'll just write it about stuff i need to be researching anyway #posts i make so that i can later reconstruct past reasoning about why i sometimes think i'm okay at my job #box opener #doctor worm

[kazoosandfannypacks]

"Because then you're going to have to answer life's biggest question: What kind of man are you going to be?"

ONCE UPON A TIME: 3.5: GOOD FORM | 5.14: DEVIL'S DUE

#once upon a time #killian jones #peter pan ouat #rumplestiltskin #mr. gold #hades ouat #once upon a time season 3 #once upon a time season 5 #good form #devil's due #maybe later i'll make a further analysis hinging on these two deals alone #i just don't like spewing salt and it might end up being really salty and idk if i want to open that can of worms yet #david nolan #milah ouat #gifs from the fannypack

[tvrningout]

divine beings in dórverold | the chosen

it should be noted that there is a difference between a god gifting a mortal magic and a god selecting a mortal as their chosen. if one should be so lucky to be blessed with a god's magic, that magic will surely be more potent than the average mage's; it is new, not yet diluted by time and blood. a mage with such magic will be formidable and not easily felled.

yet a powerful mage does not walk with a god's favor. they had it for a moment, but a god does not continue to watch over them as they do their chosen. a mortal chosen by a god to be their champion not only gains incredible magic and attributes specific to the divine but a connection to the deity. there are few places the chosen could walk where the god could not hear their call.

some describe the connection as a constant presence in their mind whereas others feel nothing but always find themselves safe from harm in moments of tribulation. how the connection manifests appears to depend upon the deity.

the records we have of chosen mortals state that a deity's own physical attributes begin to manifest in their champions. sunna's chosen gain eyes and locks of gold; nott's chosen gain a silver gleam to their eyes and flowing, black tresses; and the list goes on. it must be noted that there are certain abilities unique to a chosen as well, such as resurrection upon death for sunna's chosen, which truly divide these champions from their mage counterparts.

a god's chosen is given a touch of divinity, a sliver of true divine magic, and no ordinary mage can replicate this.

#headcanons | dórverold #hmm i'm not the biggest fan of how this one turned out tbh #there's just something about it that i'm not feeling but!! now we have a difference between chosen vs magic users #and oh this actually opens a can of worms as far as the idea that magic is diluted by time and blood #like the mortals kinda got the idea?? but having children with another magic user won't help your magic remain strong #it's all up to endir and his guys whether or not the magic is weakened or not and maybe i'll have more thoughts on that later #but for now i just wanted to point out that someone like cyrillo actually is not necessarily chosen just bc nott gave him magic #i might change my mind but for now he's just a really strong mage with a personal connection to nott #whereas rin is capable of much more bc sunna /chose/ her #chiyo in her verse was chosen by mal so he connects their minds as well as gives her magic others might not be capable of #i gotta do a post about eyda too bc tbh i don't know if eyda has chosen so much as he just?? makes deals with people and #gives them magic and taints their souls #we'll see bc i'm still thinking ANYWAY here's your lore post for the night <3 #let's see if i can muster energy for other things oof

[fcthots]

i need to be cornered and told i’m a pathetic little crybaby who needs to be fucked until i’m nice and quiet and dumb

like…exams are too much. jason should shut my brain off and fuck me against a wall pls and thanks

-🍓

Jason was concerned. You've been staring at the same page of notes for 25 minutes. There was no possible way you were retaining the information. Your eyes appear shiny with unshed tears as you've been at it for hours. You refused to take a break because you were too stressed and he was worried about you, but he knew how important this was to you. He tried to help where he could, but this is where he draws the line. He will not ignore you and let you keep torturing yourself like this. He will not ignore your tears, but he knows you won't enjoy any break you take because you'll be stressed about not studying the entire time.

So he'll make sure you can't think.

"Okay. We're taking a break."

He watches your eyebrows predictably draw up together, puzzled. "What?"

"Mandatory break." You try to object, but the moment you open your mouth, he interrupts you. "Nuh uh. We're gonna let that pretty brain of yours have a break, ok?"

He smirks as you freeze, blood rushing to your cheeks.

"We don't have to do what you're thinking, but you are going to take a break regardless."

He finally looks into your eyes. Your pupils are blown wide and your eyes still contain the unshed tears from a moment ago's studying. You don't respond.

"D'you want me to turn your brain off pretty baby?" He chuckles when you nod enthusiastically, not a moment's hesitation. He pushes his weight up from the far side of the couch where he was sat and approaches you. His rough fingers gently hold onto your jaw in stark contrast to the words coming out of his mouth.

"Does my pathetic little crybaby need to be fucked until she's nice and quiet and dumb?" The pads of his thumbs trace your jawline and you're sure he can feel the heat under your skin. He laughs when you nod. "I think she does."

He removes his hand from your chin and uses both hands to move your legs together. He drags them up and sideways onto the couch, twisting you so your back rests against the arm. His hands move your thighs apart so that a moment later he can situate himself in between them. He uses his weight to his advantage in order to pin you to the sofa. One arm is used for support to hold some of his weight; the other worms its way into your hair. It tugs at the strands until your tilt your head up, exposing your neck, much to Jason's pleasure.

He adopts a rhythm. He grinds against you, works a hickey into your neck, and then teases you. It's intoxicating. "Gonna have to flip you over at some point, baby. Maybe I'll keep you worked up until you can't hold yourself up. Would you like that? Being all needy for me? Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll do all the work for you. Your pretty little brain won't have to do a thing. Probably for the best because the only thing you'll be able to think of is my name and how good you feel with me inside you. I'll take care of you. See if we can bring those tears back, yeah?"

God, you loved his mouth. That stupid fucking mouth.

#this is what i was thinking about while studying #dirty talk >>> the actual sex #i hope your exams go better than you'd hoped anon 🫶 #saph’s love letters #jason todd #jason todd x reader #saph’s thots #red hood #red hood x reader #jason todd imagine #jason todd x you #red hood imagine #red hood x you #jason todd smut #jason todd x reader smut #red hood smut #red hood x reader smut #smut #🍓 anon

[windvexer]

What counts as a spell? Is intent all you need or do you have to do something before to get it all juicy and stuff.

Hi Anon! What a fun question, because there is no answer except this CAN OF WORMS you just opened.

There is no consensus anywhere as to what constitutes a "spell."

There is even LESS consensus as to what makes a spell go.

Intent is a good starting place. It is probably where you should start for all acts of practical magic.

But I find that in it's common form, the idea of intent + willpower = magic has been diluted past the point of utility for most people.

Like if we're talking about "intent is everything" I'm reminded most closely of Chaos Magic. But Chaos Magic is not a school of "just set your intent and you've worked magic!". It's a very rigorously developed system.

In Hine's Condensed Chaos, he lists the third Core Principal of Chaos magic as technical excellence, and I quote:

One of the early misconceptions about Chaos Magic was that it gave practitioners carte blanche to do whatever they liked, and so become sloppy (or worse, soggy) in their attitudes to self-assessment, analysis, etc. Not so. The Chaos approach has always advocated rigorous self-assessment and analysis, emphasized practice at what techniques you're experimenting with until you get the results you desire. Learning to 'do' magic requires that you develop a set of skills and abilities and if you're going to get involved in all this weird stuff, why not do it to the best of your ability?

Later in the book, Hine likens "magical powers" to the concept of achievements, and goes on to say:

Something which is an achievement is the result of practice, discipline, and patience.

Shortly after:

Chaos Magic is not about discarding all rules and restraints, but the process of discovering the most effective guidelines and disciplines which enable you to effect change in the world.

(In above quotes, all emphasis my own)

But these ideas get taken - and I'll give a big nod to the LOA which is just the worst kind of brainrot for encouraging the "intent is all that matters" mindset - and the ideas get diluted so much that people are literally out here saying, "so all those people who spend years studying magic in order to get results are buffoons? All I have to do is imagine what I want and it will be delivered to me? All humans since the start of history just have to decide they want something and it will happen in a miraculous manner?"

(Not you, Anon. I'm just in a mood)

In my mind, yes - something beyond intent must occur in order to make spells go.

But what?

Anon, have you ever heard that dumb belief floating around that all herbs in a spell can be replaced by rosemary, and all stones in a spell can be replaced by clear quartz, and these two things are "universal substitutes"?

I am 95% sure that this nonsense was based on two very popular dictionaries Cunningham wrote in the 80s, the Encyclopedia of Crystal, Gem & Metal Magic, and Encyclopedia of Magical Herbs.

In the very long entry for Clear Quartz:

Quartz crystal is used as a power amplifier during magic. It is worn or placed on the altar for this purpose.

And from Rosemary:

Rosemary is generally used as a substitute for frankincense.

And I believe that someone somewhere got the idea that since clear quartz amplifies all other powers, it therefore somehow magically Ditto-copies all other powers, and like a shapeshifter somehow becomes something it is not nor ever was.

And, you know. What's the difference between subbing out frankincense and blackthorn between friends?

These beliefs have become so popular that sometimes when unscrupulous blogs rip off entire Cunningham encyclopedia entries and paste them into tumblr posts (without credit), THEY INCLUDE THE EXTRA MADE-UP BIT ABOUT ROSEMARY BEING A UNIVERSAL SUBSTITUTE.

Anon, your question is "is it just intent or do we need other stuff to make it go," but sadly,

IMO common beliefs about the stuff that makes spells go have also been diluted past the point of utility for most people.

Because if I sat here and said, "hey Anon, it's not just intent, you also have to use correspondences ^-^/" then the very first thing you are likely to run into is absolute nonsense about correspondences. IMO, effective utilization of correspondences is a skillset based in research, theory, and technique.

Or if I said, "you also have to raise energy! 👍", this may be mistaken to mean, "set intent but also visualize white light inside of a candle," because the concept of raising energy and visualizing has been (IMO) diluted past the point of utility for most people. I believe that effective utilization of energy work is a song composed of many notes and chords, several of which you must practice before you can utilize it.

And to complicate all of this, which non-diluted things in which combinations you need to make the spell go depends on what paradigm you operate off of, because while there are approximately one billion ways to do magic that works, my currently very dim worldview is that most people who are talking about magic are doing magic that doesn't work,

and in my opinion the actual basis and reasoning, like the rationality behind the magical systems is really important. Because you need that shit to understand what it is within that system that makes the spell go.

And you need to understand what makes the spell go to make the system fit into your life without breaking it, and in order to troubleshoot problems without making things crumble further.

Because when people don't understand the basis and reasoning you end up with "rosemary is a universal substitute" and "imagining white light makes the spell go."

There are a few circumstances where you can totally strip technique from theory and be successful, but there are also a hell of a lot of people out here feeling shit about their practice because their spells never seem to work.

So.

I really just recommend choosing what school of magic you would like to learn about and participate in, and reading an introductory book on it.

This is because it is the job of introductory books to explain the principles and theories behind a system of magic, and most importantly, what makes the magic go, and a step-by-step primer on what you, the practitioner, are supposed to do to make that kind of magic go.

Despite above rambles I'm really not a Chaote, so I can't recommend a strong primer. As far as I'm aware, Liber Null & Psychonaut by Peter J. Carroll is a core text.

For Traditional Witchcraft, try The Crooked Path by Kelden.

For something more Wiccan, I can't recall having anything bad to say about Psychic Witch by Mat Auryn.

If either of these things are too Witchcrafty for you, try Six Ways by Aidan Wachter, which is still witchcraft, but it hits different.

For a general primer on helping your spells go, try Elements of Spellcrafting by Jason Miller.

#answered

[haruchi-slit]

A SOUVENIR FROM SATORU

warnings: pussy eating, soft dom! Gojo, use of toys, lots of cursing, office sex?, fucking on the floor

a/n: not my best work, but have fun!

Your boyfriend Satoru, always, as in always brings a souvenir, edible, keychains, expensive or not he will always bring you something, after his business trip or missions but this time..it was not what you expected.

"I have a souvenir for youu~!" Your boyfriend says as he runs to you with a bright aura, holding the gift bag from behind,

"It better not be expensive Gojo Satoru" you glared

"wwuu, scary as always! anyways, here just take it, you'll love it I promise~ hehe~!" he tries not to chuckle as he hands the gift bag to you.

"open it loveyy!" he said beaming with energy,

you once again glared at him as you opened the gift bag, and boy... it was a rampat bunny..you looked at it in shock, and with flustered cheeks as you looked back at him, you were confused, chuckling you asked him,

"What am i going to do with this?", he leans closer to you. "I'll be using that later" he response, and leans back out, and smiled like nothing ever happened.

"Is it for me or.." you asked, he laughs at your response, "See you later y/nieeee! the higher ups are looking f'me." he squishes your cheeks and left a peck on your lips, you watched him walk away, you looked down on the gift bag, making sure if it's really a rampat bunny,

"what the fuck.." you reached the item from the bag, and observed it, it's black, and you estimated that it was 5-7 inches long, out of curiosity, you pressed a button, with made the vibrator move,

"Oh my fucking-! what the fuck?" you screeched, when the item moved like a worm.

✧LATER THAT DAY✧

"nnn~ 'T-Toru, gahh- s'too much" you whined, as Satoru has you on his lap with spread legs, his left hand spreading your wet folds.

"Baby, it's only on level 2" he says chuckling at your pathetic aroused state, running his finger up and down to tease your abused clit, your brain was practically a mush with how much pleasure you were feeling, with the vibrator moving and hitting your g-spot you knew you'd cum in a minute, you knew you're close, so Satoru was quick to notice that, so he held the end of the vibrator using his right arm and shoved it deeper in your pulsating cunt hitting you g-spot, your body shivered and arched with the immeasurable pleasure you've received,

"Nghh~, so fucking gooodd 'Toru." you moaned as you released your orgasm, Satoru removes the vibrator from your gaping hole and set it aside, and had you limping and standing on the desk,

"Bend over baby," he says as he guides your waist to bend over

"Satoru- wh-what are you doin~" you babbled as for, Satoru he's already running his nose to your exposed pussy, overstimulating your delicate body,

"hwuu~ S'toru f-fuck, im still sensitive there, oh good god, baby-!" you tried to warn Satoru, who's inserting his middle and pointing finger in your hungry cunt,

"Try to keep still baby" he says, groaning in your pussy, sending a tingling sensation to your core.

All clothes on the office floor, pussy juices was dripping on the floor too, as Satoru messily eats your cunt like it's a five star meal,

"Satoru s'too much" you mewled trying to support your body, your knuckles was already white on how tight you were gripping on the desk, your nails leaving scratches on Gojo's desk too!

"Satoru, baby i'm s'closee!"you said, giving your warning, as you orgasm on his pretty face.

"So sweet, did you ate pineapple baby?" he jokes, as he pumps his cock on his palm, he then turns you around to face him, you saw his throbbing, angry, pink tip releasing beads of pre-cum he catches his breath trying to control it, as he gave you a passionate kiss, slowly entering your pussy,

you can feel him throbbing cause of the long neglecting, and finally he's in you, you pussy was quick to suck him in as soon as he enters his dick bulges on your tummy which means he's reaching your cervix, you're still high from your orgasm but Satoru seems to be enjoying to overstimulate and fuck you dumb,

"Satoru it's too much baby, ha-!" you broke the the kiss as you squirmed beneath him scratching his bare back and neck,

"Baby please I'll let agh- rest hmm s'good! when im done" he stutters bearly making a sentence cause of how you suck him in, he was having a hard time to go back and forth in your pussy causing him to whine even more.

A few minutes go by, when someone knocked on Satoru's Office,

"Gojo, Principal Yaga is looking for you." The voice was familiar, it was Shoko,

You heard it too despise being fucked dumb, you're not deaf, so to get back at Gojo you purposely clenched your walls tighter, causing him to stutter,

"O-oh ngh, Yeah be ha-! right there, S-Shoko hng" Satoru responds,

"Yeah, ok come quick" Shoko response, and walks away, "have a good fuck too" she mumbles on her way out.

"Oh- yeah be right there shoko nyenye" you laughed mocking him, in which he responded with a hard slap on your breast, "Hghh" you whined, as he slams you on the floor bucking your hips forward his cock pounding raw in your pussy, "You like that hm?" he grabs your hair, you couldn't respond cause of the pleasure, the stinging pain from the slap, and how hard he's grabbing your hair, you had your eyes crossed to the back of your head and tongue lolled out with saliva dripping out of your mouth,

"Satoru ah! ah! ah! hgh!" you screamed, with every scream it was punctuated, you swear you saw cloud nines with how good he's fucking you,

"Mmnh, 'bout to ohh god!- bout to cum, y/n baby" he says thrusting in you with no remorse.

"Fuck-!" he tries to hold his moans back as he shoots thick, creamy white threads in you.

"I'm so sorry baby ha- i just missed you sooo fucking much.." he says as he snaps his hips deeper in your pussy, making sure there were no cum spilling out, with his final thrust you came, you cum and his mixing together, you kissed him, "It's ok baby, i missed you too" you uttered, as you kissed him once again on his forehead.

"Okay that's enough you two, Gojo Sir Yaga is looking for you." Geto says behind Satoru's office door.

a/n: as promised 👻

#jjk smut #gojo #gojo smut #satorugojo #gojo satoru #jjk satoru #jjk

[crystallinemoonlight]

sometimes i'll think about how, at the start of episode four, pete offers to help porsche guess who he might have kissed at the pier the night before, and i imagine a crackfic where porsche goes on a quest to find out who it was by kissing his colleagues one by one - starting with pete of course that man was ready to sacrifice himself for the cause when porsche had questions about casual hookups later in the episode, offering himself up without hesitation

he visits them one by one; pol is confused... but intrigued, it's like one of tankhun's series! arm already knows it wasn't him but insists they check it anyway... just to be sure, right? you never know. ken says he'll break his face if he tries anything (very suspicious, porsche makes sure to highlight his name). big doesn't know whether to be angry or confused, he wasn't even there??? no he and ken didn't sneak in halfway through because of a secret crush, this isn't one of tankhun's series! tankhun asks what they're doing and if he can join but porsche isn't about to open that can of worms.

maybe at some point kinn catches on and realizes porsche doesn't remember but is rating the others based on if they kiss better or worse than the ~mystery person~, which is giving him an ego boost up until porsche declares that one of his friends is actually a better kisser and therefore can't possibly have been involved (said friend is very confused about why khun kinn is giving him death glares for the rest of the week)

you can even throw in some chan or vegas or anyone else if you want to, just go crazy with it, i think that'd be really funny especially if porsche just casually blasts vegas after they make out for a solid minute saying "no you're good but the other guy was just less desperate you feel me, sorry bro".

#it just sounds so funny in my head #crack 100 feel free to add whatever you want #i just wonder what porsche told pete when they were guessing who it could be?? #apo always says mile's lips are soft and his teeth are very clean so maybe that #i feel vegas would be the type of guy who wants to double triple check and just will not stop #and itd be so funny if porsche goes along just not even realizing whats happening; he just wants to figure out who he kissed #ESPECIALLY BC HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW KINNS GAY YET. HE DOESN'T KNOW. HE HAS NO GAYDAR. NONE #''vegas is such a nice guy he really wanted me to be sure in case it was him. hes so secure abt his sexuality'' #<- porsche assuming vegas is straight #double points if he never even considers the fact it might have been kinn at the pier. it just never occurs to him #kpts #kinnporsche #porsche kp #kinn kp #vegasporsche #peteporsche #kp the series #kpts ficlet #kinnporsche the series

[the-offside-rule]

Pedri Gonzalez (FCBarcelona) - Stuck With You

Requested: by anon

Prompts: 14) "It's too early."

37) "If I were a worm, would you still love me?"

Warnings: mentions of fvcking, cute stuff

As her boyfriend lay soundly beside her, Y/n sat scrolling through tik tok. It was nearing 3 in the morning at this stage and she still couldn't sleep. She hated sleepless nights, but she didn't have college for the week and no work until Saturday, so to hell with it. As she scrolled, she saw a common theme in her fyp; boyfriend stuff. She came across one tik tok user asking her boyfriend if he would still love her if she was a worm. She quietly laughed to herself as she watched them lightly bicker amongst themselves. She turned to her boyfriend and watched as he slept with a slight smile on his face. He was so peaceful....yet the voice in her head was telling her to wake him up and ask.....so of course she did.

"Babe?" Y/n shook her boyfriend gently. He stirred in his sleep, his eyes scrunching and his lips frowning with the sudden disturbance. "Baby?" She asked again. "Bebé, I have training at nine, what is it?" He asked groggily, his eyes still shut. "Nevermind, I'll go back to sleep." She muttered. "Well, I'm awake now. You may as well tell me." He said. "If I were a worm, would you still love me?" Pedri's eyes opened and gave her an unamused look. "What?" She asked. "Es demasiado pronto para esto." He mumbled. "I'm being serious! Would you?" He rubbed his face and groaned. "I'd love you even if you didn't exist." He said, turning around. "But what about if I were a worm? Worms are disgusting and gross and-

"Like you aren't already, Bebé." She slapped his arm as he laughed at his joke. "Listen, it's illegal to-" he paused, trying to word it correctly in English. "To do things?" He paused again, questioning if he was correct. "With animals." Y/n looked confused. "It's illegal to do things with animals?" She smiled. "Yes." He replied. "And what if a dog wants to go on a walk. Is it illegal to do that?" She asked. "Obviously not. You know what I mean. I can't put it to words." He said through broken English. "I wouldn't fuck animals, but it's you."

"So you would fuck animals for me?" She laughed. "No, just no. That's so weird! Why did you ruin my words?" He asked, getting a bit fed up. "Just you! I only love you and I probably only will love you!" She paused. Once again the voice in her head was telling her to keep going with the joke....so she did. "But a worm-"

"Listen! Whether you like it or not, I am stuck with you! Forever! Now please, sleep with me!"

"Sleep with you?!"

"Yes? Go to sleep with me? Is that not correct?" He asked, confused. "Babe, what you said means something different. I'll explain before training." He let out a sigh. "I love you, but can we go to sleep together?" Y/n snorted and nodded. "Alright, alright. We can go to sleep together."

Y/n was fast asleep when Pedri slowly opened the curtains to let the light in. He was dressed and ready to go to training, no thanks to the night before. He sat down on his girlfriends side of the bed and moved the hair from her face. She smiled, recognising the touch of the man. "Are you going?" She asked, rubbing her eyes. "Yes. And I googled what that thing meant. I'll be saving that phrase for a later time." Y/n chuckled and nodded. "But I thought I'd say goodbye before I left. I do have coffee in the pot for you if you want." He said. "Thank you." She yawned and looked up to him. "You look pretty." She said. Pedri laughed and pressed a kiss on her forehead. "I have to go but I'll see you later, okay?" She nodded and closed her eyes. "Okay, bye. I love you." She smiles. "I love you too, Bebé." And with that, Pedri stood up and left for training, where he walked around explaining what had happened, followed by a lot of players and coaching staff laughing at him.

#fcbarcelona #laliga #football #football blurbs #football imagines #pedri gonzalez #pedri gonzalez blurb #pedri gonzalez oneshot #pedri gonzalez imagine #pedri imagine #pedri #pedri x reader

[noowayybroo]

I saw you wanted to write something about this and ykw I’d love to see it!! Could you write some headcanons (or whatever your comfy w) abt calling leon/showing up late at his house after you got into a bad fight w ur abusive bf? Im thinking mainly he comforts you nd then deals w the bf later

TY FOR UR ASK AND IM SORRY IT TOOK SO LONG!! ok sooooo it's not like a full fic but it's a teeny bit more than a hc. I won't focus sm on the bf because I think it's a traumatic thing you know and people who might use this to cope might find it harder to relate or they might just be reminded of their issues so I'll keep it quite vague if it's ok with you. This is very vague so I think it's any Leon in mind! Enjoy!

Characters: GN!BestFriend!Leon x GN!Reader (Mentions of Reader's abusive partner)

Warnings: SFW BUT NOT A HAPPY FIC - Hurt / comfort. Mentions of abusive and just overall shitty partners. Mentions of Crying. One mention of being drunk. Mentions of abuse and victim self-blaming (the relationship really messed you up, sorry) Use of Y/N

Another horrible date ends with you storming out of what's meant to be your favourite restaurant, blaming yourself for everything you'll never be responsible for.

Your partner has a way of doing that: making you think it's you who's in the wrong, regardless of the fact that they were the one who was late and they were the one who wouldn't get off their phone and pay you back the attention you give them every day.

Again you'd been let down, and you stumble home in the rain, alone, because your excuse of a partner was staying behind to finish their meal. Your clothes are as drenched as your soul, heavy rain just about heard over pitiful sobs. You're in a world of your own, narrowly avoiding a trip or fall with each step, eyes too squinted to see more than a blur.

You're crying so hard you almost don't hear your phone buzz in your pocket.

It'll be that bastard, you think to yourself as rage seeps into your bubble of despair. What could they want now?

You've half the mind to ignore it. They're not used to you not answering instantly. They know they have you wrapped around their finger. Maybe they'll think something happened to you. And it'll be their fault.

Great.

..But then again, you don't really want that, do you? You're a good person. They've wormed their way into your head so well that you begin to feel guilty. You have to at least check... Maybe they're sorry-

Begrudgingly, almost ready to snap the phone in two the second you see that dreaded name, you pull it out to check. You're so numb you barely mind how the rain soaks the expensive screen in mere seconds. All you can bother to do is haphazardly wipe the screen across your clothing once before swiping your notifications down.

Between the gathering droplets, the message is, of course, not from your dickhead "soulmate" because really, they don't care about you. It's from Leon, your friend. And for a second, a smile almost comes to your lips. You slow down your pace and read the message, not noticing how your tears are already much less frequent. Leon's always been a sweetie. He's always there for you, and when he says he's got your back, oh boy do you believe it.

Leon never asks anything from you, he just loves you unconditionally... and you're sure it's just as platonic as you'd like it to be. He knows you care about him too, and he'd never give you any less than you give him. It must have been some kind of divine intervention that called upon him to message you now during one of your lowest moments. Or-

PLEASE don't tell me that was YOU crying outside just now.

Your jaw falls open in shock and your feet come to a still. You'd been steaming ahead on pure misery. You were on Leon's street already? Looking around confirms your suspicions as you wipe your screen again, shakily replying as tears continue to stain your cheeks. But before you can hit send, another message comes in:

THAT IS YOU OMG. Why the yelling?! Drunk again??

Just as you can finish typing out "Yeh, it was me, I'm going homes sorryyy", Leon comes bounding after you in the rain. He slows down as he gets to you, circling around to get a look at your face before draping his coat over your shoulders. He's smiling initially, glad to see you, but when his eyes meet your red, puffy ones, his face falls. His shoes are loose. One of his heels not even properly inside. He's wet from the rain, not even wearing a coat for himself. That's how quickly he left for you.

"Y-y/n..." His voice is small, dreading as he gently holds your shoulders, ducking to look into your downturned eyes "What happened?" Before you can even answer, his arms are around you, redirecting you towards his house and out of the rain. He practically pulls you along, trying to get you to shelter like a lifeguard escorting someone from the depths. You have no time to tell him anything before he's yanking you into his home.

Despite how wet and filthy you are from the hammering rain and muddy puddles, Leon barely lets you take any outside gear off. He leads you to his living-room - the sight both familiar and warming. You'd both shared many good memories here even though you hadn't been round many times. If Leon knew anything, it was how to take care of you and make you laugh. And that's why, no questions asked, he's covering you in blankets, holding you close and cooing gently about how you don't have to tell him what happened but that-

"If you want to tell me anything, I don't care what it is or how much there is, I'll listen."

After a while, you're able to come down from your panic. You're able to open up and tell Leon what happened this time. You can practically see his fists ball as he grips the blanket, pretending to only do so to pick it up and wrap it more tightly around you. He avoids eye contact. At times, it feels as though the news of your neglect affects Leon much worse than it does you.

He swallows thickly as you continue, and only when your voice cracks a little and you become teary once more does his gaze snap to you. He places a gentle hand on your cheek and once more ducks his head so he can be the one looking up at you. He respects the reason for your shy and defeated posture, not wanting to look up at him. He wouldn't have you go out of your way just to suit him. He's practically cuddled up to you, hands gently kneading you wherever it comforts you most through your blanket prison.

His eyes scream empathy and sorrow for your situation. The grimace of a scowl on his face tells you he's thinking about something, but you're not sure what. Maybe he's had a bad day. Maybe you're burdening him.

Here comes the guilt train again.

Your words falter and then you shake your head, sighing sadly. At least your tears are dry now.

"It's really nothing" You tell him, capping off a list of about a month's abuse and neglect since you'd last seen Leon. He shakes his head, almost offended.

"It's not nothing, Y/N, it's everything." His voice switches from a growl to a whisper after he catches himself on the first few words. He goes back to gently holding and petting you, sighing as he thinks very carefully about his next words. "You're a wonderful person. You're a good friend. I know you're the perfect soulmate too..." his face goes a little red. It seems he didn't think carefully enough about those words. "That sounded a little weird but what I mean is you can do better. Much better."

'Nails on a chalkboard' couldn't even come close to describing how Leon felt whenever you'd speak about how your partner treated you. For months now, it felt like within a few words, just describing your morning or text chat with the prick sent Leon to his own circle of hell.

It was tormentuous. Of course, it wasn't you. It could never be you. You were Leon's best friend. Hearing you open up to him was bitter sweet. He was grateful you were able to, but seeing you being weighed down and trodden over like this, it hurt him. You needed to leave that person, and so, Leon needed you to leave them.

He'd never told you really how he'd felt about that particular detail. He never wanted to be the bad guy, or to tell you what to do, in case it might draw you closer to your partner. Today, though, he couldn't take it any more. He wouldn't watch you suffer. Leon was going to do something about it, even if you didn't. Heck, he'd do it, even if you did first.

"You give this person everything. All your time, all your love, and I don't mean to rub it in at all, but to be honest... I want you to leave them. For yourself. You're strong and you might not need it, which is why you keep letting them do this, but you deserve someone who cares about you. Who wants you." He's looking into your eyes again, pleading for you to understand. He's begging you to just listen, just this once. Otherwise, you both know he'd let you walk all over him.

Truth be told, it didn't actually surprise you that Leon wanted you to leave your partner. You'd be lying if you'd said the realisation didn't gnaw away at you each time you looked into those eyes of his. You wanted to make Leon happy, and, contrary to his fears, you knew he was right. You'd take his side over any of your partners in a heartbeat, probably. You wanted to leave your partner, especially now those sobering words of Leon's had hit you. It was a rallying cry to stand up for yourself, and you so badly wanted to do it, but...

"It's hard." You whimper, shying away, hiding your face from Leon. Unlike your partner, he doesn't become enraged at your refusal, he doesn't lean in to catch your gaze or force you to look at him. He just stays quit for a bit before gently hushing you.

"I know, I know" He hums, barely audible - his words are so soft and quiet, fanning you. "I know it's hard." There's heavy truth to his words. Leon has always understood you, and he's been through so much, you know you're preaching to a harrowed choir.

"We've been together for months... I've never had anyone like that before. I can't just..."

"It's okay to be alone, you know?" Leon asks softly "I know that might be worrying you too... Not finding someone? But I promise you... I'll never lie about how lovely you are. Hell if you just turned around you'd see a line of people waitin'." There's a desperate tone to his voice. He needs you to believe him. But it also kinda sounds like there IS a line of people swarming his home. It makes you giggle, and that makes him chuckle.

"You know I'm being honest, right? I mean I might even-" He cuts himself off quickly and looks away. There's a small silence before he looks back at you, gently wiping calloused thumbs over your cheeks, brushing away any remaining moisture. Then, he sighs deeply "Listen, I know it's hard, but you're better off alone than with... with them, alright?"

It's hard to accept defeat but you nod weakly. You sit there together in silence for a while. Mulling everything over. Leon's right. You have to get out of there. And then it hits you. What if your partner doesn't just... let you go...

"But what if they-"

"I won't let them." his voice is firm, knowing exactly what you were going to say. He seems to have been thinking the exact same thing, and looking over, you notice he has that thinking look again, fists gripping your sides gently, protectively. "I promise I won't let anything happen to you, okay? We get you out, and we get you out in one piece." He looks into your eyes, this time, determined. His stare captures yours. You can't look away. You know what he's silently demanding, and you can't bring yourself to say no.

Weakly, you nod. "I want... I don't want to be with them anymore."

Leon lets out a breath he didn't know he was holding, and then seems to have a sort of 'eureka moment', but decides not to celebrate just yet. "That's great, Y/N. I'm... I'm happy for you." He gently rubs your shoulders a few times before getting up "How about I get takeout, yeah? This causes for celebration" He shoots you a playful smirk as he rushes to the kitchen to retrieve about 5 different menus which he then throws to you.

By the time you've escaped the four blankets he coated you with and decided what you'd like, he's got his shoes on and is ready to go. You get to your feet but are knocked back by a disarmingly playful glare. He chuckles as you fall back into the couch, defeated. "You're not going anywhere, buddy. I'm gonna get you some food, and when I get back, we'll sort things out. Okay? Just trust me, please." His look is soft. You feel completely cared for. And so, accepting his offer, you allow Leon to go on his way.

A while passes as you scroll through the shows on Leon's TV, all boring you. You'd rather be bored, though, than reading whatever abusive messages your soon to be ex had been piling up for you. You're exhausted. Curling up on the couch, you wait for Leon to get back. You feel so comfortable, and so soothed, and it's all thanks to him.

Leon was fortunate to find you asleep by the time he got back to his house. It gave him time to get changed into something more comfortable. It gave him time to clean his knuckles, and to remove any unsavoury messages that had accumulated on your phone (best friend password perks.) And by the time you woke up to the smell of your favourite food, it was still warm. He'd already plated it up for you, and you enjoyed it with your favourite choice of film. (Leon would NOT have it any other way.)

For a while, Leon's magic had drawn you from your problems, and it was only when you were drifting off for the second time that night that you even thought to check your phone. You were ready to do it. You were ready to leave that relationship behind. There was only one unread message, not a barrage of abuse, as you'd imagined.

Y/N. I understand that I've treated you poorly and for that I'm very sorry. You never deserved any of it. I hope you can forgive me, and I know you want out, so I think it's best for us both if we went our separate ways. I'll drop your things off at your mate's house tomorrow. I won't message you again.

That was strange, but it was welcome. And unbeknownst to you, you weren't the only one having the most peaceful sleep in a long time that night. Leon slept better than he'd done in months, maybe even years, and your ex, well. Your ex slept.

Thank you for reading this uhm it's kinda sussy we have no idea what happened to the ex ooo spookyyy!! imo Leon just beat them up haha Idk. Again I'm sorry this took so long! It was actually much more emotional and special for me to write haha so I hope someone out there likes it. Especially you, anon, if you're still around! Thank you! Thank you all for being here I love you all like crazy. If Leon teaches you anything here I hope it's that you're valid and important and that you matter, and not just to me!! To loads of people! Please believe in yourself and chase your dreams! Try and make time for your hobbies and aspirations! We're here to have fun and to live our lives!! Take some time out for yourself please, and remember you deserve love and respect and if people don't give it to you (when youve done nothing wrong) then maybe those people are smelly, and maybe you should surround yourself with a more positively fragrant variety of human. Love you!!!

#resident evil #re leon #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #re4 leon #leon kennedy imagine #leon kennedy x reader #resident evil leon #resident evil x reader #leon kennedy fanfic #hurt/comfort #comfort #resident evil 6 #re4r #resident evil remake

[hazbinhazbinhazbinreblog]

There's a knock at the door and Vaggie is the closest one to it. She chances a glance back to the kitchen, where Alastor is busy preparing dinner for all of them.

She looks back at the door. If it's someone dangerous, it's best if it's her opening it instead of one of the others.

Before she can stop herself, Vaggie opens the door.

And immediately regrets it.

Standing at their doorstep is Vox, the Technology Overlord and nemesis of Alastor, who's currently inside the hotel.

He lifts a hand in greeting and smiles, "Hey—"

Vaggie slams the door, attempting to process what's going on. She opens it once more.

"—kid."

And slams it shut again. Vaggie wonders if God is punishing her. It's likely the only reason this is happening.

"Charlie!" she shouts.

Charlie peeks out from behind a corner. "What's up?"

Vaggie points to the door. "Charlie, the Technology Overlord is at the door!"

Charlie, much to Vaggie's consternation, brightens up. "Really? I haven't seen him in forever! Let him in!"

Vaggie, against her better judgement, cautiously opens the door for the third time.

Vox is still standing there, though he seems more amused than angered. "You gonna let me in?"

He doesn't wait for a response before he takes one step inside and gets tackled by an overexcited Charlie.

"OH MY GOD DAD IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU!"

Vox simply laughs and hugs her back. It's good to see you too, kid. I heard music on the radio today and thought I might drop by.

Vaggie stares at them. Huh?

Charlie nods and tugs the other demon further into the hotel. "I know, I know. It's been a really long time since there were any good songs on, but I'm so glad that my favorite station is back!"

Vaggie follows them to the kitchen.

They stop at the entrance, where Vaggie sees Angel do a double-take and drop his cup on the ground the moment he spots Vox.

Vaggie's more concerned about how Alastor will react. Everybody in Hell knows how the Radio Demon and CEO of VoxTek hate each other.

The second Alastor lays eyes on Vox, she's prepared to summon her spear.

But contrary to her expectations, Alastor merely shoots Vox a look of disappointment. "You're late."

What.

Vox shrugs. "Sorry babe, traffic was a bitch."

Alastor rolls his eyes. "Go set the table, darling. You're the last to arrive."

What?

"Fine, fine. But I want the second biggest serving."

What the fuck?

Charlie suddenly remembers Vaggie's lack of knowledge and laughs nervously. "Right. I also forgot to tell you that Vox is my other other dad. I'll tell you more after dinner."

Vaggie wonders what else her girlfriend has forgotten about telling her, but that's a whole other can of worms they'll get to later. Right now she just wants to enjoy Alastor's food. "Sure hon."

ALSO EQUALLY LOVE LOVE LOVE THIS ONE TOO

Slightly different alt version

#ask #staticradio #fanfiction #dadstaticradio au

[youvebeenlivingfictional]

if you are accepting suggestion for The Other Half, could you write something about them staying in bed in the morning? since it's been said that Bruce tries to cuddle the shop girl when she needs to get up 🤭 i love this fic sm

Previous Part | Masterlist | Next Part

Warnings: Fluff; explicit sexual content - grinding, oral sex, fingering, spit as lube, vaginal sex, unsafe sex

Minors interacting with 18+ content will be blocked

"Don't. Move."

"I have to," You mumble sleepily, squirming in his arms. "It's—" You yawn widely, "'m gonna be late for work."

"Work?" Bruce's chuckle is warm and rough. "It's Sunday, baby."

You frown, blinking against he sleep trying to drag you back under. Is it? You'd attended a work event on Thursday, a party at Liz's on Friday, and yesterday had been a full day of errands. It's just been so busy that you've completely lost track.

"...Oh," You mumble, sinking back against Bruce's chest. He hums contentedly, tightening his grip on your waist as he nuzzles into your neck. You smile a bit, resting your hand atop his.

"Still," You offer, "Should probably get up, 've gotta get my outfits for the week together—"

"Later."

"And do my meal prep."

"Alfred will do it."

"I don't mind doing it."

"Neither does he."

"You know what I mean."

"Baby."

You're almost teasing him for fun now. You used to think that Bruce was so difficult to shake up or irritate, and now you know exactly where his pressure points are.

"Maybe I'll just grab some coffee," You add, feigning getting up. Bruce groans loudly, and you shriek as he yanks you closer. Before you can even reach for the blackout blinds controls, Bruce pushes you onto your back, clambering on top of you. You giggle softly as he curls his arms under your shoulders, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.

"Go back to sleep," Bruce urges. You let your eyes slide closed, smoothing your fingers through his hair and honing in on the warmth and weight of Bruce's body, and the steadiness of his breathing.

--

You don't know how long you drifted off for. You can feel lips brushing against your neck, and hands smoothing tenderly over your bare thighs. You hum softly, shifting your thighs up to bracket his body between your hips. Bruce mimics your hum, hips shifting against you. It's a moment before you can hone in on the sensation, but you can feel—him.

Your lips part in sleepy surprise as Bruce's hips roll against you, his hardening cock brushing your thigh. You suck in a soft breath as Bruce's kisses drift lower.

"...Time is it?" You mumble.

"Who cares."

His hands shift up under your sleep shirt, hiking the fabric up. You raise your heavy, sluggish arms just enough to help him draw the shirt off and toss it away. Bruce's lips brush along the curve of your breast, his tongue flickering out and swiping across the hardening nipple. You shiver, hand curling more tightly in his hair as you tip your hips down against his. You grind against one another lazily as Bruce laps and teases your breasts. You can feel yourself growing slick as Bruce's cock slots against your cunt, the head catching against your clit every few thrusts.

You whine as Bruce's cock grazes your opening. You raise your hand, lapping broadly over it before you worm your hand down between the two of you, grasping his cock. Bruce's groan rattles through you as you take him in hand, stroking over his hardened length. You smooth your thumb over the head, smearing the swelling bead of precum, and grinning as Bruce's hips stutter against your grip. You pout when Bruce draws away, the covers dropping from your bodies as he scooches even further down, slipping from your hand.

Before you can even think to ask or complain, Bruce presses your thighs wide, lapping broadly across your pussy. Your mouth falls open, your moan stalling in your throat for a moment. It breaks loose the tip of his tongue teasing and circling your clit as he sinks his fore and middle fingers into you. You let your thighs splay, your body sinking back into the mattress as Bruce turns his head from side to side, smearing his lips and chin with your juices as his fingers scissor and curl.

For all of your sleepiness, you can't help your body from grasping desperately at him.

"Bruce," You mumble. He hums against you, making the growing sensation in the pit of your belly tighten.

"Please," You breathe. Bruce tips his chin up, lapping quickly across your clit as he plunges his fingers into you. Your orgasm swells sharply, and you cry out as you tighten around his fingers. Bruce's pace doesn't slow until you use your grip on his hair to yank him up. His jaw drops in turn, groaning loudly at the sharp sensation. Intrigue sparks in your belly as Bruce's fingers slow and ease back, smearing your juices over one of your nipples and dipping in to give it a lusty suck.

You reach down, swiping your hand over your slick skin before grasping Bruce's cock. He groans, tongue sweeping over your breast with the same lap speed as you stroke him. You guide his cock against your cunt again, shivering as you brush the head against your tender clit. You don't need to plead again, though it's ready on your lips. Bruce presses his hips forward, and your hand falls back as he eases into you. Bruce tips his head down, his forehead resting against your shoulder as your cunt throbs around him.

"Fuck." He breathes it so quietly that you nearly miss it. You whimper, curling your arms around Bruce's shoulders and planting your heels against the mattress.

For the almost frantic way that he lapped as you, Bruce's hips roll with a controlled leisure. You know that he's holding back, but he seems determined to take his time, to draw out your pleasure. When you try to push back, to pick up the pace, Bruce pins your hips to the bed, murmuring, "Just—nnggh—Take it."

You whine at the order, at the feeling of Bruce's hands pressing against you so tightly, and his chest brushing against yours. You so rarely get to witness Bruce's strength, let alone experience it. You turn your head, searching blindly for Bruce's lips before catching them with your own. You trade slow, searching kisses as Bruce's hips roll tightly against yours. He winds you nearer and nearer to your orgasm, and you can't help but press up into his grip, against his cock. Bruce doesn't gripe, just nips and tugs your lower lip between his teeth as your nails bite into his shoulders.

"Bruce," You mumble once he's broken the kiss.

"I know," He murmurs, "I know, baby—Fuck, give it to me."

You moan, pressing your head back into the pillow and arching up into Bruce as your orgasm crests, as you feel Bruce bearing down and filling you. You sigh through the little tremors and aftershocks, as Bruce's hips finally still, and as he settles over you again. He grunts as your grip on him loosens, as he rests his hands on either side of you. You reach down, drawing the covers up around your bodies again.

"...We should get cleaned up," You murmur after a moment, grinning as Bruce groans.

"If I hear you trying to make plans one more time."

Next Part

#Bruce Wayne x Reader #Bruce Wayne x You #Bruce Wayne/Reader #Bruce Wayne/You #Bruce Wayne fic #Bruce Wayne imagine #asks #replies #anon #The Other Way

[mihai-florescu]

Putting a message i sent earlier under a read more, it has some thoughts ive expressed before tho. ES, of course

My thoughts as an EichiP... i view ! and !! as different stories in the way they're approached tbh, what i fell in love with enstars for was the character driven storytelling of one event seen through different perspectives, where you see the antagonist in one perspective become a protagonist in another story and can empathize with the entire cast like this. I fell in love with eichi's story of second chances, getting what you want and regretting your actions in the process, redemption, desperation, overcoming fate and asserting one's self into the story, saving a school in a dying industry that saved your life by giving you a dream; i consider it an arc fulfilling to the reader at the end of ! era. But we still had to continue... and it's not like we didnt get inklings of eichi's dreams of idol utopia, the idol soldier idea goes back to main story 1, but !! loses the charm of the original series through expanding the worldbuilding so much and shifting to a plot driven story that opens 10 cans of worms instead of offering resolutions. There's not really room to breathe if the stakes just keep getting higher and higher...

As for the colonisation plotline, it's been here since the beginning of ES2. The SS arc makes it obvious, but i remember even before, the talks about ES taking over from local businesses, trying to be seen as the standard, it was always the direction ensemble square as an institution would take. But the "antagonist in one story, protagonist in another" approach doesnt work anymore with such subjects. The guys responsible for this are your coworkers you share dorms with. I read the stories but cant empathize anymore, so i've been feeling disconnected from eichi for a while. I see enstars with eichi at its core but i didnt care for his center event, i read it, didnt like the ending, and overall felt off. Eichi becoming the villain of ! to attone for the war kind of loses significance if a year later he is a cartoon villain idol colonialist you can't even sympathize with anymore because of the magnitude of events. However i do think !! has done good things for some characters pushing them further or developing them in a way ! didnt. But for others...

I also have my issues with sci fi elements becoming the norm, even taken metaphorically or as hyperboles, when one of the central themes i love about enstars is humanity. Then again, i am a war era fan that relied on manipulating human desires and perceptions, and the fact that there were no monsters or gods, just humans framed as such, playing on people's fears and beliefs, it's a bit jarring to me to have them introduce AIs forming from escaped comatose brains (im minimizing the switch climax rn, i didnt even hate it as a whole, just this resolution im unhappy with)

It also feels like we've lost some of the meta aspects of the writing i liked, a certain awareness of being characters in a story and there being an audience. But im still struggling to word my thoughts on this matter. I felt it present in main story 2, even if it annoyed me at parts in its obviousness ("good thing we're not protagonists, no one would want to read about us" youre right aira you are not interesting to me. And yet i'll read your story to try and empathize nevertheless. I have other thoughts on aira too, perhaps for another time). I wish we explored a bit more what it means to no longer be the central protagonist, from trickstar's perspective...and brought back the successors topic. But i havent read every ts story yet so i'd be foolish to complain before really making sure i've checked everything. To me ! ended satisfyingly with room left for elaborations and imagination, but i dont feel like !!'s ending is really ending anything at all. Not necessarily bad since it's not like the game is shutting down, but overwhelming worldbuilding wise while underwhelming character wise...

Let's see... im not sure how to end this. Just a bit of a stream of consciousness as a ! fan who still loves enstars despite my critiques. Mainly, well, no one's gonna take away the stories that already exist that i do love and impacted my life greatly. And i do think !! had some really good things too it brought, or at least stories i hold dear too. Change is scary and i don't think it's always for the best, but it's also fun to see where it goes next...

#enstars

[shankss-magnificent-ass]

Imagine figuring out when King's birthday is

That Fall

You: *notices King has it noted in his planner that he had no plans on the afternoon of December 1st* sir, would you like to schedule the quarterly finance meeting on the December first?

King: no, keep that afternoon open please, I'll be taking time off that afternoon.

You: I've worked for you for almost a year, and you've never taken time off. Is there any particular reason why?

King: ... No reason

You: *suspicious* okay.

A week later

You: *has to pull the past three years worth of King's planners from the archive for actual work but checks December 1st in all the planners and deduces that it must be important to him*, so he always takes that afternoon off

Yamato: *sprawled on top of a desk, eating Cheetos and intentionally get dust on the floor of Kaido's office* hmm yeah, my father will usually give him some sort of gift, and they go out to lunch together. Although few times Father even tried to get him some of the girls from the brothels to entertain him for the night, but the last time was back when I was a kid. I'm pretty sure after his lunch with my father, he holes himself up in his room.

You: oh can't imagine that went over well.

Yamato: HaHa! No, one of the girls got pushy and King had to throw her out of his quarters.

You: it must be his birthday then, King is too much of a duty driven workaholic to take time off for himself for anything.

Yamato: oh my god, maybe, now that I think about it, I don't know his birthday.

You: in that case I need to move around a few of his appointments

Yamato: *crushes a handful of puffy Cheetos and sprinkles it across Kaido's chair* why would you do that?

You: because he works too much, so any chance I can get him to relax I'll take it.

December 1st

King: when's my appointment with Orochi?

You: Tomorrow

King: You're wrong, check again, I scheduled it for today.

You: I'm not wrong, I moved it two weeks ago to tomorrow. In fact, I moved most of today's appointments to different days. The only thing on your schedule today is Queen's annual service review, torturing a few prisoners, and your lunch with Kaido.

King: oh my, what did I do to deserve such pleasant day?

You: *shrugs* just lucky I guess, it's not like it's your birthday or something. *Squints at King*

King: How'd you know?

You: because only you would need need to wait until your birthday to be able to justify taking time off to yourself. Oh, and remind me which restaurant you are going to with Kaido?

King: His chiefs are making Spicy Udon for us, it's one of my favorites.

You: but not your favorite, which is why I had a crew go out and get a bunch of flying fish to make sashimi for your dinner. It'll be delivered to your rooms at six, and the servants have instructions to deliver it to your door, where they'll ring a bell to announce that it's there, so you don't have to talk to or interact with anyone.

King: I don't deserve you sometimes.

You: I know

King: *ruffles your hair and laughs* you're not supposed to agree with me.

That evening

You: *knocks on King's bedroom door* Sir, I apologize for interrupting your evening, but I've come to deliver something.

King: *currently doing some self-care, so he's not wearing his mask* ... come in

You: *drags in a bouquet of massive flowers you had the Tontatta's grow, and his present* Alrighty tidy, these are yours, happy birthday

King: If you keep this up you'll spoil me. What flowers are these? I've never seen them before, but they're somehow familiar.

You: That's because they're from atop the Red Line. They're called, Flame Daisies, they were once the symbol of the Lunarian Kingdom. They also remind me of you, and they're good for your skin.

King: *didn't anticipate flowers would open an emotional can of worms*, and what's in the box?

You: just a little something something,

King: *opens it to find boxes filled with paperwork and gives you a confused look*

You: those are the only remaining copies of your Punk Hazard records, to do with as you please.

King: you're kidding

You: nope, I destroyed the others, I even got Vega Punk to delete his mental records of them. Good night King, and happy birthday.

King: now wait a damn minute, you can't make me feel like a weepy little bitch, and then just dip. No, your ass is staying here and drinking with me. You're also getting a few face masks, because your'r skin looks awful, sit your ass down.

Support me on Kofi and Patreon

#one piece #one piece x reader #one piece imagine #king one piece #king the wildfire x reader #king the conflagration x reader #king the wildfire #king the conflagration #yamato one piece #beast pirates #animal kingdom pirates #from the depths of the dragon's hoard #tma original #12/1/22 #no beta we die like men

[aqours]

anyways if i'm going this deep in lemme share this teen mom Ashley fic idea i had i'd love feedback on the idea

this is completely unrelated to my other idea regarding this this is an entirely different can of worms i'm putting this under a readmore just bc it's a bit long and also filled with dead doves so only open and eat it at your own discretion

so basically the idea goes like this- when they were teenagers (her 14 and him 16) Andrew and Ashley got into some kind of big fight (still working on it) most likely due to him having a girlfriend in hs at the time. during this period, in an effort to make a point and piss him off, Ashley gets a boyfriend of her own (who just so happens to have messy black hair and green eyes wow what a coincidence) who was in a class with Andrew. some incident happens where Ashley "accidentally" leaves her phone with explicit texts on view (but also tis like the 90s so maybe i'll redo that) and Andrew talked with his classmate and then uh there was another second missing person, and after an intense argument Ashley and Andrew "slept in the same bed" and anyways a month later Ashley announces she's pregnant casually at the dinner table putting the pregnancy test she put right on it.

"Huh. Not the reaction I was hoping for."

"Forgive me for not being particularly fucking thrilled at the idea of being a grandmother at 32, Ashley."

"You know, if my kid has a kid at 15 and their kid ALSO has a kid at 15 you could be a great-great-grandma at only 75."

"Please shut the fuck up, Ashley."

and Andrew is in complete denial it is. it's been 6 years and every single person except Julia refuses to believe it isn't. at one point when Alexis "Alex" Graves is a baby she makes a comment she has her father's (green) eyes with a wink and grin at Andrew. during the Burial Route when Mrs. Graves is trying to plead with Andrew she finally says "... If you won't do it for yourself, do it for your ------------------" and it's like his brain physically blocks out any insinuation with he's the father with white noise. so he's been living as the kid's uncle officially and has no idea how to act around this kid most of the time.

Ashley is not a good mom by any means and has had CPS called on her more than once but incompetence won't remove the child entirely and she does like. actually love this kid but her obsession with Andrew is clearly more important to her, the fact this kid keeps him tethered to her even if he won't admit, and also because she spoils the kid however she can to try to prove she's a better mother just because her daughter is happier than she was, when learning Alex hit another kid to get their candy she was outright like fuck YEAH if you want something take it!!! girlboss gatekeep gaslight to this four year old and Andrew at least tried to teach the kid right from wrong in response. during her first birthday Mrs. Graves asked Ashley if she was gonna do anything and Ashley didn't see a point the kid is 1 they won't remember the birthday there's nothing they'd want and she doesn't seem to process the point of a birthday for a baby isn't about toys and fun but to celebrate their life. when Ashley suggests they can get by on mugging people Alex says she can pose as a homeless sad kid and for the first time in a while at her Ashley lights up and says THAT'S why you're mama's favorite <3333

babies don't make everything better the co-dependent toxic satanic demonic summoning cannibal incest game's plot now also includes a 6 year old that has also eaten people now with two of the most awful parents imaginable around her and if anything Ashley might get colder once her mom is dead because now there's no way

thoughts? i really want to write this but i'd love feedback

#the coffin of andy and leyley #andy and leyley #andrew graves #ashley graves #gravecest #coffincest #ashley x andrew #i have. no idea how to tag this otherwise lmao #dead dove do not eat #there #starposts #long post

[formulinos]

HYPERFIXATION CORNER | NOW, THAT'S WHAT I CALL LATE STAGE FORMULA 1!

theydies and gentlemen of f1blr, i regret to inform you guys that the rumours are true: we live in a society. liberty media's tenure with FOM has opened a can of worms that ushered in what i've been calling lately "late stage formula 1". But the thing is, what the fuck would that be, exactly? so, as a good scholar, i took it to myself to study more about late stage capitalism in order to truly understand the term and see if my application made any sense. in today's hyperfixation corner, we'll get deeper than necessary on the microcosm of capitalism that f1 has become. and then we will get depressed. but maybe, just maybe, we can figure this out.

note: this has 7k words AND at times gets quite dense in terms of sociological theory, but i truly did my best to make it palatable. still, this is not going to be everyone's cup of tea and might get boring. if you still believe this is your thing, i just ask you to please hang on tight and see it through to the end as i truly feel everything ties up together rather logically.

PART I: THE DAWN OF LATE STAGE FORMULA 1

the basics of late stage capitalism

the application in late stage formula 1

PART II: YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY - FORMULA 1 AND CAPITALIST REALISM

mark fisher's capitalist realism

the indycar situation

was there ever class consciousness in f1?

the illusion of abu dhabi

THE DAWN OF LATE STAGE FORMULA 1

1. The Basics of Late Stage Capitalism

For a term we see being used daily on several outlets, you'd be surprised to find out that there isn't a rigid definition. In fact, depending on who you talk to, you'll get widely different explanations, since there's basically "academia" late capitalism and "normie" late capitalism. I'll brush up those two for you guys real quick because, at this point, might as well.

The term was coined by a German scholar Werner Sombart. At the time, just at the start of the XX century, he was a HUGE Marx/Engels stan. He had all of their photocards, but beyond that, he also took to himself to write his lifetime's defining work, which is basically an expanded universe fanfic to what Marx and Engels wrote, tbh. In 1902, Sombart started to publish "Der moderne Kapitalismus" (Modern Capitalism), comprised of three volumes in which he discussed four stages of capitalism: proto-capitalism, related to the appearance of capitalist-like tendencies in feudal society until it became proper capitalism + early capitalism, which was basically seen pre-industrial revolution; high capitalism, which came in with the industrial revolution and ended with WWI; and at last, late capitalism, which was what they were living at the time of the third book release (1927), that is, post world wars world. That's all very chill, but given that later on Sombart drank the kool aid and became a Nazi, he can fuck off.

Thank God, two other dudes came in to take the expression from Sombart. Ernest Mandel and Fredric Jameson are two scholars who, although published their works in different times, were responsible for widespreading the term. Mandel published Late Capitalism in 1975, marking it as the era of economic expansion post WWII that, in his view, would reach its peak in the 70s since the economy was starting to have frequent crises. Jameson, however, dropped his book, Postmodernism or, the Cultural Logic of Late Capitalism, 16 years later, talking about the then-current world marked by globalisation and the expansion of capitalism to culture (arts, lifestyle, etc.). 

All of this is to say that, today, if you ask an economist or a political scientist, they will most likely talk to you either about this time progression or straight out use Fredric Jameson's definition. Which, tbh, works, since in a way Jameson touches on the expansion of capitalism to daily life, something that goes in common with the contemporary POV on late capitalism.

We legit live in hell rn, no big deal

If you go on Reddit or watch corecore edits on tiktok, then there is a sense of dread and irony that's unique to the internet's definition of late capitalism. Since it's a relatively recent thing, there isn't a concrete way to define it, so I'll just use the one given by Ian Neves (Brazilian Historian) in his video about Capitalist Realism because I think it's the one that manages to summarise it the best: Late Stage Capitalism is the stage of capitalism in which the contradictions of capitalism are so evident that they become explicit to the population. That is, it is so in your face that it stops being campy. It's just tacky.

In the video, Neves further explains that one of the big deals about capitalism is that it sells itself as a contradiction-free system, but in our current time we aren't quite fooled anymore. A few examples of this would be multinationals like Amazon opening factories in underdeveloped places like Tijuana, under the guise of wanting to "help develop the country" but placing themselves close to a slum, clearly showing their intentions of exploitation; You can also think of the "art" market of NFTs, which are nothing more than numbers stored in a computer - capitalism touts itself as being a creator of value capable of meeting society's needs, yet there is no need met with NFTs besides value generation for the sake of value generation and pure speculation. Anyway, there are several examples and whatever you think is probably Late Stage Capitalism.

2. The Application in Late Stage Formula 1

Having done this deep dive, imagine my face when I realised that it turns out I didn't just pull "Late Stage F1" out of my ass. I was gooped! Gooped, I tell you. See, if late stage capitalism is now defined as the era in which capitalism's contradictions are explicit, then Late Stage F1 can be easily perceived as the stage of the sport in which its contradictions are no longer capable of being ignored by the fans either. In that sense, it does feel that this is the perfect way to synthesise the bitterness that a large part of the fandom tastes in their mouths. 

note: I'm not stating that pre-Liberty Media Formula 1 was perfect. God forbid I become one of the purist fans talking about the good ole days. Bernie Ecclestone wasn't shit and in a way, some of our issues nowadays are inherited from his tenure as the head of FOM. But, at the same time, the sport managed to sell itself as a luxury hobby while still being satisfying and accessible, in a way or another, to the non-wealthy fans. You couldn't see as many contradictions as now because the image of the sport was more or less aligned with what you actually saw, good and bad. 

The same, unfortunately, can't be said nowadays. To illustrate my point, let's take a look at FOM's Corporate Strategic plan, released in 2020. The idea, in their words, is "to deliver a more popular, more exciting, and sustainable sport, which pushes the boundaries whilst protecting our heritage.", supported by six axes:

Race – Increase competitiveness and unpredictability on track

Engage – Produce an amazing spectacle for fans on and off track

Perform – Generate value to our shareholders

Sustain – Deliver sustainable and efficient operations

Collaborate – Create win-win relationships with our partners

Empower – Build an engaged and high-performing workforce

Besides Perform and Collaborate, arguably the two most capitalistic inclined pillars, it's incredibly easy to find counter-arguments to illustrate how this is just corporate talk and doesn't actually reflect on the sport. [cracks fingers] So, let's get it:

✷ Increase competitiveness and unpredictability on track: Ok, sure, they try with this one as it is the core of the sport - after all, this is what the regulations' tweaks are for. But you just need a quick overview of the Andretti situation to see that competitiveness only serves the structure to a certain point. After all, although Andretti managed to get the backing of a manufacturer (General Motors, in the form of Cadillac) which, in theory is enough to make it a more legitimate entry less likely to Caterham levels of bankruptcy, the vibes are still somehow off from camp F1. 

Michael and Mario Andretti on a pit wall during something that WASN'T a Formula 1 race

This all boils down to the revenue split at the end of the season between the teams and FOM: once you remove the bonuses that are thrown around, roughly 50% of what's left goes to FOM, and the other 50% are the championship prize money (don't quote me on these percentages actually, I'm not sure if it's exactly 50/50) . If Andretti gets in, then either the teams' share gets diluted as a consequence of an extra mouth to be fed, either FOM needs to adjust its own reward to increase the total prize money and make sure that all teams still get the same liquid value for positions 1-10. 

Now, Andretti are willing to pay the 200 million dollars "anti-dillution" fee that's to be distributed to the already existing teams as a regulated "sorry we're gonna have to split the prize money in 11 from now on". Yet, instead of welcoming the bid, teams have lobbied for an increase to that fee to 600 millions, a cheap tactic to either get more money or to keep Andretti out. On one hand, Christian Horner has made it clear, from the teams' perspective it is about the money. On the other hand, Stefano Domenecali and FOM are hot and cold, stating that he's happy Andretti are interested but mad that they're calling out the bureaucracy of the process. 

The key aspect here is that F1 no longer needs an American team to reinforce their position in the United States market as they did back in 2014 when Haas formalised their entrance. In fact, they don't even need Haas to assert themselves as American anymore as they have three GPs lined up regardless of the team's national fanbase. This way, in FOM's optics, they have nothing to gain from Andretti. In a way, the teams are basically doing what's expected of them, but bottomline is the fact that FOM is fucking mental in adopting the same perspective instead of planning how an extra entry of such magnitude as Andretti-Cadillac could pay itself with time.

✷ Produce an amazing spectacle for fans on and off track: See, I guess you can call me a bit of an old school fan, because when it comes to Formula 1, I WANT TO SEE THE FUCKING CARS RUN ON THE FUCKING TRACK. I suppose many of you are aligned with me on that one.

Using the 2021 numbers as reference since we didn't get the 2022 report yet, the average global audience is around 70.3 million. Given that the biggest venues can only hold 400k attendants tops, the rest of those 70m fans are watching the GPs from home. They are also most likely having to pay for it, since F1TV's dominion keeps increasing. While, all credit is due, F1TV offers a much better pay-per-view experience than many other sports have, with a very rich archive and incredible coverage of each race weekend, some of these prices per country are a legit effort for a fan to make. 

From the Reddit post, an example of the price disparity between countries. F1TV is priced accordingly to the purchasing power that each country has.

Could be worse as many other fans are held hostage by Sky Sports, which is only available with a much more expensive £34.99 subscription to UK and Ireland fans, who don't even have F1TV as an alternative option. Given that Sky also has the airing rights in Germany and Italy, the fact is that F1's free to air presence has been lowering over the years (a problem that has been discussed in 2016 and represented a decrease in viewership at the time, mitigated by the Liberty Media efforts). But F1 really can't be arsed in considering a full return to free-to-air TV given the current times and so, the idea is to basically adapt to the pay TV market as much as possible and to retain free-to-air positions in specific markets. And if you, individually, don't have the money to pay for it and there is no free-to-air alternative for you, tough titties.

When it comes to actually attending a Grand Prix though, it's becoming equally harder to do it. The F1destinations 2023 rank shows that there has been an average 56% increase on the average 3-day ticket price in relation to 2019, costing roughly 508 dollars. In terms of affordability, these tickets can represent from under 10% to over 50% of the average monthly net wage for the countries hosting the GP. If it was just the tickets that would be easy peasy, but the fact is most of the times attendance includes the need for housing, transportation, food, etc. What this means is that it's fucking expensive, ok? 

The GPs are getting more and more packed, but for how long?

Again, the sport has always been elitist, but there was for a good while a relative balance between your average fan who managed to save up and get a GA ticket with the rich wealthy fans at the paddock drinking their champagne. Nowadays, even people who were regular attendees of their home gps have tapped out due to being priced out. Plus, even the new GPs added to the calendar already come with a big disclaimer "FOR MONEY ONLY" as, for instance, the cheapest tickets for Las Vegas cost 500 bucks but the real average price for the three days is $1,667.

So, if they are in fact producing a great spectacle for fans, it's becoming more and more hard for said fans to actually be able to see it. Whatever.

✷ Deliver sustainable and efficient operations: F1 made a pledge in 2020 to improve their relationship to Mother Nature by 2030, which includes: Net Zero carbon, sustainably-fuelled, hybrid power units, efficient and low/zero carbon logistics & travel, 100% renewably powered facilities and credible carbon sequestration. The whole pdf has a bunch of lovely lines about their grandiose plans, but these are somewhat easily dragged to filth by anyone who understands just a tiny bit of eco-sustainability. One of these people is David Bott, chief innovation officer for the Society of Chemical Industry*. 

Bott explains well the situation with the fuel. F1 cars currently use E10, which is a mix of gasoline (+ the likely additives that gasoline already has) with 10% ethanol, a sustainable fuel. The thing is, gasoline is more popular than ethanol for cars for a reason: if you take 1L of gasoline and 1L of ethanol, when you burn them, gasoline will give you way more energy. According to Bott, this means that the new E10 fuel is not as potent as gasoline would be, so you end up needing to use more of it anyway and in the grand scheme of emissions, that means fuck all.

F1's carbon footprint per sector. Does something feel funny to you?

Still, as F1 itself showed in their sustainability report back in 2020, the power unit emissions are less than 1% of the total emissions during a season. As you'd imagine, the thick of it really lies in logistics (45%, transportation of all equipment) and business travel (27,7%, transportation+hotels of f1 staff). Drivers and TPs carpooling with their private jets might help a little bit, but it's evident that F1 doesn't give a single shit about improving those numbers given that the calendar has expanded to 23 races, three of them in the same country but in completely different times of the year, which means that the back and forth of airplanes between continents will correspond to a 15% increase to emissions in relation to last year. According to Paolo Feser, If they were to at least organise the calendar in a sensible manner, they could cut these emissions by half, but such a calendar would go against their contracts with Bahrain and Abu Dhabi for the season's opener (till 2036) and finale (till 2030), respectively. When you consider the pledge's deadline of 2030, it's pretty evident that they'll say they made it because of the drop-in fuel in development, but logistics are far removed from the rest of it.

✷ Build an engaged, high-performing workforce: TALKING OF THE 23 RACE CALENDAR, the biggest impact is obviously on the workforce. Race weekends are gruelling enough for the drivers, who have stated through the GPDA their concerns of burnout. But then, you also have to consider the garage side, who are used to a minimum of 12-hour shifts during a race weekend, having to adapt to more frequent double and triple headers. As an anonymous mechanic said:

"Then, when you are coming home on a Monday morning or Monday evening, and you haven't slept properly in days, that then affects how you feel in your personal time. It means your relationships can suffer – either because you are agitated with your partners or you've got other things on your mind. And that's not fair on you nor them. You are not just mentally fatigued, you are physically drained as well. As the season wears on, there are a hell of a lot of injuries happening. The teams do have doctors and physios to help look after you, but the easiest solution is to pump you with painkillers to just keep you going. There is no way in a million years that a regular doctor would give you what we are given to keep us going."

The psychological strain adds to the anxiety of creating the perfect car and work culture has become increasingly tense. To add to the tension, the cost cap negatively reflected on the workforce as many teams, including RBR and Mercedes, had to fire people to adapt to it. Those who stay have to be reminded that they are "so lucky" to still have a job and if "they don't like it, they can go" (as Tost said in 2021) but the situation is overall so demotivating that yeah, people are quitting motorsports overall or changing categories. To sum up, the engagement and performance of the workforce isn't out of love for the sport, but fear and pressure.

To wrap this with a golden bow, I could never forget the #WeRaceAsOne initiative, still touted by F1 as a campaign that really wants to bring awareness and impact important problems in our society. When it was created in 2020, the main focuses were COVID-19 and social inequalities, but given that they banned T-shirts in podiums in 2020 after Lewis Hamilton protested the death of Breonna Taylor by the hands of US pigs, they clearly weren't comfortable in really tackling the inequality issue. Therefore, they changed the goals of the campaign for a very corporate "Sustainability, Diversity and Inclusion & Community" axis, whatever the hell they mean with that. It's good that they can focus on it all they want, as the FIA has banned drivers from political statements during race weekend procedures. Moreover, while the boycott of the Russian Grand Prix is completely justifiable, it still feels empty once you consider they raced in Saudi Arabia while a factory mere miles away from the track was bombed, also as an act of war.

To sum up, the fact is that late stage Formula 1 is here to stay and we have to deal with all of the sport's contradictions. The same way that late capitalism does not mean that the end of capitalism is near, late stage f1 means nothing as its popularity has been rising more and more, and at the current rate, the abandonment of the older fans means jackshit as more people show up on social media and are willing to pay what's necessary to either watch it or attend races. The question that might linger, in fact, is if F1 has reached the point of inevitability at last?

----

YOU CAN'T RUN AWAY - FORMULA 1 AND CAPITALIST REALISM

1. Mark Fisher's Capitalist Realism

Even when we're faced with the existence of a late stage Formula 1, whether when it's concretely laid down or just a feeling deep down, many of us still continue to engage with it. As much as we complain about it, the current panorama does show an expansion of the sport, which can only happen as well because a good chunk of the old school fans remain. The question is, why do we insist on watching a sport when we know shit is that bad? Is it solely because of affectionate ties to a team, a driver or even f1 itself? Sure, these factors contribute to it, but what if I told you that it is also because current F1 has finally managed to sink into our collective consciousnesses as inevitable?

To understand what I'm trying to say here, we need to look first at the big picture. That is, if we have been treating F1 as a microcosm of capitalism up to this point, it's now necessary to step back and face Capital itself. In order to do this, I want to introduce to you guys the concept of capitalist realism.

Say hello to Mark Fisher (1968-2017), an incredible mind gone too soon

While, just like late stage capitalism, "capitalist realism" was an umbrella term used for a myriad of different meanings, we don't have to contextualise its timeline. Rather than that, we can jump straight to Mark Fisher's defining work, "Capitalist Realism: Is There No Alternative?", published in 2009. In it, Fisher defines it as "the widespread sense that not only is capitalism the only viable political and economic system, but also that it is now impossible even to imagine a coherent alternative to it". Putting it in simpler terms, it's easier to imagine the end of the world than the end of capitalism. 

With capital realism, Fisher no longer talks just about the influence of capitalism at a socio-economic level, but also how it bled into the cultural and psychological spheres (scary!!!!!!!). All of this culminates in apolitical attitude towards capitalism: since we can't escape the system because things are like this, all we can do, realistically, is to adapt to it and try to minimise its effects instead of actually fighting them.

Having that in mind, I ask you guys: can you imagine the demise of F1? We often hear about it separating from the FIA, but similarly to capitalist realism, Formula 1 losing its world championship status (as close to its end of the world as it gets) feels more likely that a massive restructuring of the category or it shutting down for good. Similarly, fans have adopted an "it is what it is" point of view towards the sport as we all know what FOM and the FIA are like and we don't have, supposedly, the power to change anything, we just have to suck on whatever they propose to us.

Stefano Domenicali (FOM CEO) and Mohammed bin Sulayem (president of the FIA), joined in unholy matrimony

Now, capitalist realism didn't show up out of the blue. According to Fisher, neoliberalism was the mother of capitalist realism. This is because its campaign in the 80s and 90s with regan and maggie thatcher (names in lowercase because I don't respect them) was successful in gaslighting people into thinking that it wasn't necessarily perfect, but it was the only approach of government rooted in reality. Once it was implemented, the next step was to consolidate it, which happened thanks to two factors: the end of the soviet union and the transition to post-fordism. I know this seems crackheaded and with no relation to F1, but give me a chance pls!

Trigger warning: the many faces of neoliberalism

During the Cold War, there was a concrete antagonist to capitalism in the shape of the USSR*. With its demise, this role of a real opposition to it was completely obliterated, allowing for capitalism to expand however it pleased without anything to contest it. Similarly, maybe F1's biggest triumph in these last two decades - and this is why I said at the top that Bernie wasn't shit and the problem about late stage F1 had its roots further back - is that it successfully managed to free itself from the sole category that threatened its popularity: Indy Car.

*note: by stating this, there is absolutely no value judgement. the statement is not about the ussr being a problematic fave or a communist hell that needed to be abolished. it was just a physical entity that asserted itself as a possible alternative to capitalism. by its physical existence, it allowed for public consciousness to understand that, if the ussr was a possible alternative to capitalism, then there might as well be plenty of others. kindly remember that the ussr was quite oppressive and countless people and countries suffered on their hands, while also understanding that for this particular purpose, it did its job.

2. The IndyCar Situation

The IndyCar World Series as we know it was established in 1979, with CART (Championship Auto Racing Teams) as the governing body behind it. The similarities between F1 and IndyCar went beyond the cars (although the Indys were a tad less sophisticated than F1s): the creation of CART itself was based on Bernie's FOCA model (television rights, sponsorships, etc). 

IndyCar's Indianapolis 500, 1992. Not bad in terms of attendance!

From the 80s, its popularity grew in America, with them even inheriting venues that originally held grand prix, like Long Beach. Still, no one was really intimidated by them as F1's presence in the US, albeit messy with several different events attempted, was constant during that period. However, shit went down in the next decade, when Formula 1 was shut down by the organisers of the US Grand Prix at Phoenix right in 1991. From that point, it would take 9 years for F1 to get back, at the heart of American racing, Indianapolis. Hold this information.

Once F1 disappeared from 'Murica, IndyCar thrived, at least for a while. CART had managed to join ACCUS (Automobile Competition Committee for the United States), who are affiliated to the FIA, which made it possible for drivers to race in Indy without losing their super licenses. Soon, there was a migration from foreign drivers to IndyCar, and that included people from F1, such as Emerson Fittipaldi. Once that happened, the sky became the limit for Indy and they started to race outside of the US. By 1993, Nigel Mansell had dropped F1 after a rift with Williams and decided to go drive for Newman/Haas at IndyCar instead.

Nigel Mansell and teammate Mario Andretti. Oh how I want Nigel, ngl.

note: the motherfucker demolished his competition, won IndyCar and is still the only person to be, technically, F1 and IndyCar champion at the same time.

At this point, some people will say Bernie Ecclestone wasn't bothered, but he hadn't even gotten over losing the Long Beach GP to CART back in 84. You know Bernie, I know Bernie, we all know Bernie. HE WAS MAD!!!! At the same time, NASCAR was rising in popularity like never before, causing a certain rivalry between the categories over who would take over the hearts of all the petrol head americans.  

Enter Tony George, then head of the Indianapolis Motor Speedway and chairman at CART. Tony believed that CART was getting lost in the game and ignoring Motorsport Traditions by racing in venues that weren't ovals. Since Georgy was annoying as fuck, CART booted him from the board of directors, which was one of the most stupid decisions given that he owned the track that literally gave the name to their championship. IndyCar's whole thing was the Indianapolis 500, right? "So fuck you too," Tony George cried while being thrown away from the CART offices by security "You don't want me? Then you don't get to race the Indy 500 anymore!".

Well, it didn't happen exactly like that. Instead, Tony George created a separate category called Indy Racing League that would be dedicated exclusively to ovals and get to be the owner of the Indy 500 from 96 onwards. The original IndyCar series changed its name to CART and Indy racing in America became fractured. Just to be clear, IRL did allow an 8 CART car limit to compete at Indy 500, but CART decided to boycott the event instead. This worked for some time, and CART still managed to make do with their reserves (they even offered to buy F1 in 1998) but soon these started to dry out as sponsors dropped the series and teams started breaking the boycott to race in Indy 500, eventually by the 2000s completely defecting to IRL. In 2004, CART filed for bankruptcy and got bought out, living as a zombie series until 2008 when IRL bought it and reunified them. At this point, the damage was done as NASCAR had taken over in popularity and F1 was back since 2000, racing the IMS.

Tony and Bernie, BFFs 5eva

Oh yeah, haven't you heard? 1998 also marked the year where it was announced by Bernie that F1 would come back to the United States, racing at the holy land of Indianapolis herself. Sounds sketchy? You're not the one to think that, as both Jacques Villeneuve (1995 IndyCar champion 1995) and Gordon Kirby (journalist, US correspondent for Autosport 1973-2004) have stated that Bernald, alongside NASCAR boss Bill France, basically whispered sweet nothings in Tony George's ear to get him to act a fool. Although it took several more years for F1 to finally sink its teeth into the United States in an effective manner, the main competition was out before they could even expand further. 

It was up to Formula 1 then to expand without anything to stop it, as we can see in the many calendar changes we've had over the years. Even further, since there is no antagonist, this has also allowed F1 to turn its sights to the feeder system, creating its own "preferred" path that, with the super license points system basically make it harder for drivers who are outside of the F1 feeder series bubble to make it to F1 (as we've even seen recently with Colton Herta). Same thing is happening to the W Series, which for lack of funds wasn't able to finish their 2022 season even though they were promoted to an F1 support championship, racing. While Formula 1 did not offer to help them or tried to integrate them properly in the feeder series ladder, they have just recently announced F1 Academy, their own initiative for female drivers, placed officially just under Formula 3 with a direct link. That's great for the female drivers, but incredibly fucked up at the same time.

3. Was There Ever Class Consciousness in F1?

Yeah, so the whole lack of opposition didn't help on an external basis, but there is also an internal factor that cannot be ignored and it's linked to post-Fordist work structure. In Capitalist Realism, Mark Fisher cites a study by Richard Sennett called "The Corrosion of Character: The Personal Consequences of Work in the New Capitalism". In it, Sennett states:

"Where formerly workers could acquire a single set of skills and expect to progress upwards through a rigid organizational hierarchy, now they are required to periodically re-skill as they move from institution to institution, from role to role. As the organization of work is decentralized, with lateral networks replacing pyramidal hierarchies, a premium is put on ‘flexibility’.[...] This flexibility was defined by a deregulation of Capital and labor, with the workforce being casualized (with an increasing number of workers employed on a temporary basis), and outsourced."

Translating this, instead of becoming a specialist on something, you become a jack of all trades without any job stability. In the F1 world, this is seen not only in drivers changing teams and getting sacked of the category altogether, but also in the poaching of talent between teams and the frequent internal restructurations. Ian Neves says that post-Fordism was key in the establishment of capital realism because its natural consequence is the individualisation of work, which leads to the weakening of trade unions and ultimately, the mining of class consciousness.

As one would expect, there isn't a trade union that looks after all F1 workers. Instead, most of the engineers, mechanics and other staff are subject to the unions of the countries the factories are located at (for instance, Alpine is protected by the "collective convention of metallurgical engineers and workers").Therefore, as much as the personnel is against work conditions and calendar expansion, it's much more difficult for them to unite and rally against it as they have been segmented. 

Ferrari team photo, 2022. Together, but divided nevertheless 

This is particularly fucky when you consider the existence of the GPDA. The Grand Prix Drivers' Association is a trade union that, historically, has made itself heard in delicate situations where drivers needed to claim their rights and fight for their safety. Unfortunately, this comes with a side effect that reinforces a difference between drivers from the rest of the F1 crew. While they are absolutely right and the GPDA should exist as a trade union regardless of the existence of a larger one encompassing all workers, the fact is that the illusion that drivers are in the status quo of the sport, and not subject to it, remains.

Look, as much as they are in a privileged spot and reap all its benefits, the fact is they do not own the cars they run - well, at least not most of the time [stares at the Strolls]. They still rely on the teams that own the structure and the backing of sponsors, that is, the means of production, to work. Most of the time, when they retire from F1, they still tend to race in other categories or find side quests. While I have no doubt that drivers are super passionate for racing and you can't completely quit it, how much are we sure that this is also not partially motivated by the desire to make sure they are still able to afford the lifestyle they had as Formula 1 drivers? Marx was clear, baby, the drivers are as much the proletariat as anyone else. By separating them from the rest of the structure and maintaining the post-fordist work structure for the rest of the teams, class consciousness inside the paddock is close to none and it helps to consolidate F1's status as an almighty being.

4. The Illusion of Abu Dhabi

Here's the thing: if "realism" is used as an argument for maintenance of the current state of affairs, by conforming to what's in theory "realistic", then the best way to threaten it, according to Fisher, is if you manage to expose the cracks of said "realism". This should be able to work because, get this, there is a difference between what's Real and what's reality. 

Again, sorry but I'm gonna get theoretical here. However, when you consider that so much of what we're talking about here directly relates to a psychological sphere, you can't not add some psychiatric theory into this. When you look at it from the point of view of Jacques Lacan (French psychiatrist who spit some bars), reality is constituted not of what's actually Real, but of social conventions and symbolism. The Real itself is unrepresentable and even traumatic at times, and you can only perceive it when you look at the inconsistencies of reality, that aims to suppress it! What the fuck!!!!

It's super easy, you just have to show that the whole framework is inconsistent!

Except it never works that way.

Going back AGAIN to capitalist realism, take a look at the 2008 Global Financial Crisis. I don't understand much about the mechanisms of the economy (and I am right not to, as this is all made up by weird people), but even I know that the Lehman Brothers collapse resulted in a worldwide clusterfuck that saw many lose their lifetime of savings. After that point, the ripple effect was so severe that companies were falling like flies and it was up to State interventions to halt things. Maybe the greatest example of late stage capitalism, this was the key point to explicit the greatest contradiction of neoliberalism: they sell themselves as a system above the State, however they needed the State to save it, which means they don't really want to abolish State, just to occupy it to their own desires.

The absurd numbers of the financial crisis in the US.

So, you have your reality cracked, you can look at the Real and see the inconsistencies of capitalism laid bare in front of all of us. This should have been enough for neoliberalism/capitalism to go out of style completely right? As you can see if you look out the window, however, we're still living in a capitalist society. Then what happened? The crises ended up reinforcing the status of capitalism precisely through the bank bail-outs as the States doubled down on the whole "realistic" thing because they had no alternative and saw these companies as "too big to fail". What we see today, then, is an economical model that clearly fallible, yet remains because it's perceived as a default. Mark's words, not mine. 

But this is in the field of Capital. It's not like, in the F1 bubble, anything of the genre has ever happened.

Yup.

I guess you could say there have been moments in Formula 1 that came close to exposing these inconsistencies but didn't, like crashgate, spygate or the whole 1989 championship debacle. Still, these didn't expose anything because:

1) F1 didn't sell itself at the time of those events the same way it does now

2) All of these could be easily pinned to individuals instead of the whole structure of F1 itself - even Senna put 1989 on the back of Balestre only, instead of the entire FIA.

Abu Dhabi, however, wasn't looked at the same way given that it's still such a controversial topic and was the point of rupture to many fans with the category.This is because the series of events that led to Abu Dhabi, touted as the biggest showdown since 1974 and followed it afterwards managed to create the circumstances to break the veil between the reality (F1 as the greatest, most spontaneous motorsport modality in the world) and showed the Real (the newfound need to push narratives, consequence of the transition from sport to entertainment encouraged by Liberty Media ran-FOM, enabled by the FIA and accelerated by Drive to Survive). 

The animosity between TeamLH and the Orange Army lingers to this day. However, regardless of its peak at the time, the controversy of the actions taken at the Grand Prix did not provoke just an outcry amongst Hamilton fans, but to a good chunk of neutral parties as well. We're still here though, so how did Formula 1 manage to escape from it? Simple, they also reinforced their position by the immediate actions of the FIA, as Jean Todt demanded a review of what happened. In its swiftness to respond, the World Motor Sport Council, that is, the one institution that could bail-out F1, states they would take action to understand what happened and avoid any problems in the next season. 

The bail-out, in this sense, isn't monetary, but institutional as they place their focus on the "relevant parties" instead of the major structure itself. From their side, FOM avoided taking responsibility for their role, as Domenecali said right after that "We have already spoken with the president [Mohammed bin Sulayem, who had just assumed his role] . We talked about the priorities he will have to face, and there are many.". This landed as well, as the common reaction was to demand the FIA changes and penalties, blaming Michael Masi for "trying to balance the need for spectacle with the rulebook" instead of addressing the root causes of the need for spectacle itself. 

Masi had it coming, but he sure made it easy from the FIA and FOM

In that sense, the reinforcement also comes in the sense of self-criticism, since it leads to something called "interpassivity", a concept developed by Robert Pfaller:  when the actors in Formula 1 take it to themselves to discuss and criticise the sport themselves, they are performing our opposite stance for the fans, who then are able to continue to consume it as they please. This is possible as well because we take a "cynical distance" from the sport and thus become passive spectators. This way, as long as we say to ourselves "oh, F1 is rotten nowadays", that's all we need as a cop-out to keep watching it. This is not just us being hypocrites, per se, but legit one of capitalist ideology as Zizek puts it that we overvalue our internal beliefs in detriment of our external actions - literally the "there is no ethical consumption in capitalism" of it all. It's inevitable we replicate this behaviour when it comes to watching Formula 1.

So, once we get all of the way, the question remains: is there anything that can be done to truly change Formula 1? It's not just a matter of direct action, as what we're talking about here is a result of a concealed mulit-layered internal organisation that acts on an abstract level. As much as we can bitch and moan, fan protests and team appeals are direct action and thus, easily countered by the FOM/FIA complex. Hell, these two fight all the time and yet any crisis is easily fixed, as just the mere possibility of F1 separating from the FIA was enough to get bin Sulayem to step away from day to day administration. On one hand, FOM doesn't want to truly separate from the FIA, they just want to occupy the FIA themselves. On the other hand, the FIA needs F1 to stay so that they can continue to assert themselves as the big dawgs in motorsports. This is how they manage to walk hand in hand and compromise over their own interests instead of the interests of the sport itself.

Maybe, this triumph of FOM is directly related to the biggest weapon of capital realism: the individualisation of the being, placing their responsibility and expectations solely on the self instead of the greater structure. This can be seen in situations such as the climate change approach, focused way more on our need to recycle than the large corporations' impact on the environment. Another example is the approach of mental health, that most of the times places on your brain alone the responsibility for your disorders instead of considering as well the influence of social conditions.

In the context of F1, the individualisation is exacerbated by the nature of the competition. Everyone is fighting for their own interests, and in a way, that has always been the goal. Still, the excessive encouragement of rivalries and toxicity - not only in the fandom, but in the paddock itself - serves the role of segmentation very well and helps FOM to continue pushing through F1 as they please. It all boils down to the lack of class consciousness between ALL the personnel, who could adopt strategic approaches that directly affect FOM's directives, turning what was abstract into a concrete issue and thus making it possible to take direct action. (tbh many of these issues can be addressed if capitalism itself is fought but then again, the impact of that on the vroom vrooms can be quite extreme and maybe that's asking too much of a sport dominated by car manufacturers and such).

In the role of fans, we both reflect the inner machinations of Formula 1 and feed it. Thus, the same way that all the staff should unite, so should we. While when it comes to track action many of us are rivals, and some of the drivers legit make it hard to stand with them, fact is the real enemy at the current date is FOM - even if Liberty Media sells it, the next administration will most likely double down on their approach. Our best hope isn't to boycott F1, but to encourage the union of its staff and show that while we welcome the technical evolutions, the main goal must be preserved. Food for thought, really. In the meantime, thank you for surviving till the end! As always, screw you guys, I'm going home!

In the role of fans, we both reflect the inner machinations of Formula 1 and feed it. Thus, the same way that all the staff should unite, so should we. While when it comes to track action many of us are rivals, and some of the drivers legit make it hard to stand with them, fact is the real enemy at the current date is FOM - even if Liberty Media sells it, the next administration will most likely double down on their approach. They were the ones that created the conditions for Abu Dhabi to happen, they are the ones that benefit the most from the rifts. Our best hope isn't to boycott F1, but to encourage the union of its staff and show that while we welcome the technical evolutions, the main goal must be preserved. Food for thought, really. In the meantime, thank you for surviving till the end! As always, screw you guys, I'm going home!

#hyperfixation corner #late stage capitalism #capitalist realism #cheers you guys good luck to those who read it #most normal ana formulinos write-up moment