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#can't stop thinking of his son
wearenotjustnumbers2 · 5 months
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Journalists in gaza are posting their last message.
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What are we waiting for, what have we allowed to happen?
Ismail and motaz are the same journalists in this video by the way. They're people who always find light in the dark. Praying for them and all Palestinians.
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one-time-i-dreamt · 1 year
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Marvel added a new superhero to the MCU called Flightless Bird Man. His power was turning into any flightless bird.
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REREADING TIME
I have some funfact
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I don't know if anyone remember this but I was rereading some of the chapter and I see this note
And yup like the note say is was quite ironic for them to be like this
I think other than the two fukus they really should put fukufuku too but it a note so meh
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omgahgase · 1 year
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din, to force ghost anikan: i'm sorry i took your son's virginity. it won't happen again
force ghost obi-wan: at least he apologized—
force ghost anakin: THAT'S NOT THE POINT, MASTER
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dirtytransmasc · 8 months
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me when I realize how willing Alicent was to die for her son (she stood between him and a dragon. what was she meant to do? she could do nothing against a dragon. even if she shielded him from the flames, it wouldn't be enough to save him. she stood there, knowing if Rhaenys was set out to kill her son she would go with him. she stood there accepting that if her son died she would go with him. she would protect her baby with her last breath. she would go out holding his hand, head held high, bathed in fire because there was nothing she wouldn't do for her children):
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willowser · 4 months
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regarding ex husband bag, i have an hc that might not be popular but: i think bakugo retires from prohero work kind of early, like late thirties/early forties. Hes done more in two years than most heroes do in their whole lives, he's gone all out, almost lost an eye or a limb more times than he can count. He's gone through that whole league if villains ordeal, it changes his perspective on his juvenile ambition. He has a son, and while that used to spur him to work more and protect him, now he realizes that's the very thing that split his world in two. So, he cuts down on the patrol hours, maybe starts teaching the next gen of heroes to feel less guilty, he finds purchase in combing down rowdy boys' hair as best jeanist did before him. But that doesn't quell his guilt, his sense of impotence and ptsd and maybe that's when you start slipping together again. He works more but still looks tired, cause he stays up all night, awake. He has more time to think, about you and your son and his perceived failure as an husband and a hero. And you, well you love him still, so you help him. He falls asleep easier in your arms, thinks less when he's with you, feels less guilty when he sees why he left in the first place, his wife and his son. And I think that's how you get back together, you slowly fall in love all over again (the love was always there) and give him solace and meaning, and he can finally protect his wittle family the way it deserves. 🥺🥺
this is so heartbreaking and mending all in one omg !! but no, no, i absolutely agree with you !! i really think about this a lot, like. how long do we think bakugou really does this hero business ??
i tend to have this personal hc that he does retire a little early, like maybe late 30's. idk, i think after everything that's happening now in the manga, i think his perception of 'victory' and 'success' will change a bit. i also think with all this coming out about endeavor, and then literally being at the forefront of it all in the worst way, i almost think he would be a little disillusioned ?? obviously he still loves his heroes, 100%, but i think he finally is able to see through the smoke and mirrors and realize this life isn't as grand as he thought it was. that it's a lie. so i definitely see him retiring early.
but oh boy !! that totally does take its toll on him mentally !! you are so right !!! because he may know what he was striving for doesn't really exist, but that doesn't change that it was his lifelong goal, and that has to be so hard !! he probably goes back and forth for a while and maybe even loses his sense of identity and aklhfakhfgka it's probably so conflicting for him 🥺 
and then fitting that into the plot about his lil son 🥺 you put it together with such heartache !! such comfort !! you are so so right. i don't even want to add more because it's perfect !! 
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How do you feel about Jack Drake?? What are your thoughts on him and Tim’s relationship?
Anon, I hope you were interested in a novel, because look, I am fascinated by Jack Drake.  He’s key to a whole lot of what I find compelling about Tim as a character, and if I were in charge of DC, I’d bring him back to life.  This would make Tim unhappy but would IMO make for good plotlines.
Jack and Tim’s relationship is Complicated (TM)...
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Jack and Tim hug in Nightwing 20 / Jack impulsively yanks a TV out of the wall in Robin 45 / Tim grieves in Identity Crisis
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“I could tell the truth.  But I don’t.” - Robin 66
...and it involves a whole lot of Tim lying, and feeling guilty about lying, and thinking about telling the truth, and choosing again and again to keep lying.
And I think that’s great.
Below the cut:
Shorter version - key points about Jack
Really long version - my gentler take (vigilantism is choir and Jack loves sports) vs. my harsher take (Jack has some major flaws)
Final thoughts
Shorter version - key points about Jack:
He’s a bad parent.  He’s self-centered, he consistently prioritizes his own comfort and interests over his son’s, and when upset, he does things like order Tim off to boarding school.
But he’s never a bad parent in an actionable way.  He’s not like David Cain or Arthur Brown, who are abusive monsters.  Jack’s not a monster!  He just...kinda sucks.
He genuinely loves Tim. If Jack’s aware that Tim’s disappeared or is in trouble, he’s always worried and upset.  He periodically resolves to be a better dad, and IMO he’s always sincere.
And Tim loves him, a lot.  Tim’s protective of him and worries about him when he’s kidnapped or in danger, and when they’re reunited, Tim’s really relieved and usually hugs him (and Jack hugs back!). 
...But they have very little in common, and that’s a problem. Jack doesn’t value the things that Tim values, or respect the people that Tim admires, or care about the things that Tim’s interested in.  Tim lies to him a lot, but that’s partly because he correctly guesses Jack wouldn’t respond well if he knew the truth of what Tim’s up to.
The Batfamily is a surrogate family that Tim’s drawn to because of the ways his real family doesn’t meet his emotional needs…but also he feels guilty about that and disloyal. (And to the extent that his dad recognizes what’s going on, he's jealous and resentful!)
Very long version:
(LISTEN I HAVE SO MANY THOUGHTS ABOUT THIS)
Okay!  So first: Jack’s a character who IMO is pretty up for interpretation.  You can interpret him very charitably, and make excuses for the bad behavior, and fill in the blanks sympathetically when situations are ambiguous; or you can interpret him uncharitably, and emphasize the bad behavior. I don’t think either approach is invalid - it depends on what kind of story you’re interested in!  I have enjoyed Bad Dad stories and also stories that redeem Jack.
My personal take on canon is that Jack and Tim’s relationship is in a gray area.  Jack's definitely neglectful, and he does prioritize other things over Tim, but he’s never so bad that Tim can easily reject him, and he's never so bad that Bruce could justify taking Tim away.  He's just...not great.  Tim loves him, and feels loyal to him, but it’s a very mixed-up complicated love.
I have a gentler take and a harsher one which I switch between as the spirit moves me. xD
My Gentler Take (tl;dr: vigilantism is choir and Jack loves sports)
Here’s the core conflict: Jack and Tim are very different people with different values.  Tim idolizes Bruce and Dick and vigilantism, and secretly gets involved, knowing his dad will hate it. He gets increasingly wrapped up in his secret world and lies to his dad...because if his dad finds out, he’ll make Tim quit.
This is a great setup for an ongoing comic.  It’s practical, because it provides endless potential for plotlines, and it’s nicely thematic, because it maps closely onto relatable real-life situations with extracurricular activities:
Tim the drama nerd whose dad thinks he’s playing football and not in the school play; 
Tim the closeted-queer kid secretly getting involved in his school’s politically-active Gay-Straight Alliance; 
Tim the choir kid whose dad only values making money and wants him to go into the family business (and Tim keeps promising himself he'll give up choir soon, definitely soon, but maybe he'll stay in just a liiiittle longer, because they need him, you see, the last tenor left town, so...); 
Tim the computer geek with the sports-obsessed dad (this one’s just canon);
etc. etc.  
The extracurricular metaphor works pretty well for Tim’s relationship to vigilantism.  Tim's involved in his "extracurricular" because he genuinely thinks it's important and fulfilling, and he values it and wants to be good at it. He idolizes Bruce and Dick because they're good at it. He's been collecting information about it since he was a little kid, and hiding it from his parents because he knows they wouldn't approve. And mayyyybe there's also an element of low-key rebellion against his dad, and maybe that's secretly part of the appeal. And yet also as Tim gets more and more invested, he starts to daydream: maybe I could tell my dad and he'd be proud of me and supportive. But he doesn't, because actually he knows his dad would be upset and angry and make him quit.
And - again, just like with lonely kids and extracurricular hobbies - one of the things that happens is that Tim starts getting his unfilled emotional needs met ... by people he knows through this secret hobby. And people like Bruce and Dick start turning into a surrogate family. Which Tim feels guilty about. And also as Tim gets more and more wrapped up in their world, he has to lie to his dad even more, which means the distance between Tim and his dad gets bigger and bigger and more and more unfixable.
I love this dilemma. It's simple, it's recognizable, it provides endless sources for conflict, and there's no obvious solution! Tim can't tell Jack: he'll make Tim quit! And Tim doesn't want to quit, because he loves choir / art / theater / whatever.  Yeah, it’s difficult, and there are challenges, and sometimes he has doubts...but at the end of the day, he cares about it a lot.  And everything he values is there, and all the people he admires and cares about are there, and all he wants in the world is to feel like he's one of them and belongs there. So he has to lie, even though he doesn't want to lie, and he feels guilty about it...
...but also he ends up lying more and more.
(Sidenote: I think it's important that Tim chooses to keep lying - Tim's narration often glosses this as "I have to lie to my dad," and that's certainly how it feels to Tim, but this... isn't quite true. He has to lie to his dad, because if he doesn't, his dad will get mad at him and try to stop him, not because he literally has no choice about it.)
Other Reasons Why I Like The "Secret Extracurricular" Interpretation
(tl;dr it complicates not just Tim's relationship with his dad, but also all his other relationships)
Tim's problems have some obvious parallels to Steph and Cass, who both become vigilantes while rejecting their evil supervillain dads. But Jack isn't evil. And that means the Tim-and-Jack relationship is ambiguous and complicated in ways that I like. Steph and Cass can just leave their Bad Dads in prison, and say good riddance, and feel very righteous and triumphant about it! Tim’s more complicated. Tim gets into vigilantism ostensibly out of duty and altruism, but secretly, he's also involved for straight-up selfish self-fulfillment reasons. He's lonely, and bored, and his life feels pointless, but he thinks that Bruce and Dick are cool and amazing and he wants to be a part of the things that they do.  When his dad gets jealous of Tim’s relationship to Bruce, and feels like Tim’s looking for a surrogate family, he’s... not wrong.
And the ways in which Jack is not Actionably Bad complicate things from Bruce's POV.  If Jack was a straight-up villain, it’d be an easy call to keep in touch when Jack finds out and makes Tim quit...but he’s not a villain, not really.  So what do you do?  Do you try to surreptitiously stay in touch with Tim even though you’re ignoring his dad’s express wishes and thus forcing Tim to sneak around?  Do you respect his dad’s wishes and stay away from Tim even though you have a years-long relationship at this point?  
Again: a bit similar to the extracurricular analogy.  Say you’re the choir director and you’ve built this whole relationship with a kid in the choir, and you’re an important mentor to him and you care about him etc. etc. etc.... and then right before a big performance, his dad finds out he’s been secretly involved, and yanks him out.  How would you react?  Well, maybe kind of in some of the ways Bruce reacts.  You replace him. You’re annoyed with him. You miss him. You want him to come back. You’re also worried about him.  You’re upset with his dad.  But also... what should you do, exactly?
Bruce and Alfred and Dick care about Tim as if he were part of their family, but he’s not part of their family, and there’s a lot of interesting tension there.
My Harsher Take
Jack never hits his son.  But his temper is a big deal.
In his worst moments, he takes out his anger on Tim’s stuff - wrecking his room, or ripping his TV out of the wall and confiscating it.  When he’s worried about Tim, he usually expresses that fear by yelling at him / punishing him / sending him away - threatening to send him to boarding school in Metropolis in Robin III, or threatening to send him to military school abroad in Robin 92, or actually forcing him to go to an all-boys' boarding school post-NML.  
This is bad behavior!  It is Not Good!  
And you can easily connect the dots to a bunch of Tim’s terrible coping mechanisms, like the constant lying and or the fact that Tim’s go-to methods for dealing with interpersonal conflict are 1) repress it and pretend it never happened (most of his fights with Bruce), 2) withdraw from the relationship until he can pretend the conflict doesn’t exist (when his friends get mad at him in YJ, he quits the team for a while), or 3) literally run away from home.
Also, Jack is a Manly Man with firm opinions about how men behave vs. how women behave, and he thinks boys shouldn’t be scared and thinks Tim should date hot girls and pushes Tim to work out and wants him to play football and expresses period-typical sexism, etc. etc. etc. ... and though obviously this wasn’t what the writers had in mind at the time, all of that is certainly interesting to read backwards in the light of Tim as a queer character.
More Disorganized Thoughts on Jack Drake
Tim’s our hero, so we’re naturally more sympathetic to him, but it’s also true that relationships are a two-way street, and Tim doesn’t value any of the things his dad values, either.  Jack at various points is shown to care about grades, business, money, boarding schools, archeology, football, a kind of macho bragging-about-dating-hot-women ethos, and a very public and performative kind of caring. Tim tends to respond with discomfort or disinterest or even disgust.  When Jack gets on TV to try to rally the government to save his son from No Man’s Land, Tim isn’t touched—he’s mortified.  When Jack makes some bad investments and loses money, Jack’s deeply upset and his self-image is majorly impacted, and far from being sympathetic, Tim’s annoyed and kind of contemptuous of the idea that this is a problem.  Jack thinks fishing in the early morning and going to tennis matches is a fun father-son activity; Tim finds it exhausting and tedious.  And so on.
This means that Tim often longs to be closer to his dad in theory, but this longing is more tied to fantasy than to reality. He rarely seems to enjoy spending time with His-Dad-The-Actual-Person.  So for example, when Tim’s deadly ill with the Clench, he has an extremely poignant fever dream about telling his dad the truth and getting hugged…even as he insists in real-life to Alfred and Dick that he does not want them to tell his dad what’s going on.
The same is true of Jack, who IMO genuinely wants to be closer to his son and is continually declaring that he’s going to turn over a new leaf and get closer to his son…and just as continually backs out of activities or loses his temper when faced with spending time with his actual son.
Tim and his dad sadly get along best—by far—in Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder situations.  When Jack gets kidnapped or is in danger, Tim worries for him (and Tim grieves him deeply when he dies).  When Tim disappears or runs away, Jack’s genuinely worried about him.  So e.g. they have a really moving emotional reunion and hug when the earthquake hits Gotham, and Tim panics about his dad’s safety and comes running home (and meanwhile Jack’s been panicked about Tim’s safety!).  It’s the day-to-day, regular life stuff where they don’t connect.
Jack's written quite differently by different writers. Mostly, Tim's parents are at their least likable in his early appearances and early miniseries (this is where you get, for example, Jack and Janet being nasty at each other while a pained employee looks on, and Tim disappointed to once again get news of where his parents are via postcard - "I guess that sums them up! Never know where they’re going to be–or when–or even how long!” - and Tim alone on school break, and Bruce and Alfred thinking there's something weird going on with Tim's parents, etc. etc.). Jack's more sympathetic but still often unlikable in most of Tim's Robin solo, and he's almost invisible (but positively treated if he does show up) in Tim's team books.
For obvious reasons, Jack's remembered way more sympathetically after his death. Tim's completely devastated by Jack's murder, which he arrives moments too late to prevent, and he basically never gets over it. We see him grieving Jack again and again in Robin, and also in Teen Titans, and also in Resurrection, and again in the Halloween Special, and again in Batman: Blackest Night, and all the way up to the end of Red Robin. Tim also grieves for an extended time over Janet - he hallucinates a happy reunion with her when he's feverish in Contagion, and hallucinates her in the final issue of Robin, and the reveal-your-buried-emotions song in Robin 102 brings up his grief for her too (meanwhile, other characters dance or laugh or otherwise get giddy).  Tim’s grief over his parents’ deaths is intense and long-lasting.
I'm not going to clip comic panels because this is long enough, but if you're curious, here's a nice and fairly lengthy compilation of comic panels with Tim and Jack.
If you're interested in a Jack-centric story with a softer-but-still-recognizably-canon take on Jack, I really like the way Jack’s narration is written in the one-shots Heart Humble (set shortly before Jack dies) and Never a Hero (Ra's resurrects him during Brucequest, and Jack's archeology skills turn out to be unexpectedly useful).
#tim drake#jack drake#ask tag#i wrote this ages ago and now i can't remember what i was going to add to it so oh well draft amnesty? sorry for the long wait anon!! <333#anyway i kept this carefully on topic and virtuously did not derail into talking about the other blorbo but tags are for disorganization SO#for me this kinda half-in half-out place where tim is with the batfamily is SUCH an interesting part of his relationship with dick#and i never stop turning it over in my head#he's kiiiinda replaced dick in that he's robin - but in a very real way he *hasn't* - he's NOT bruce's new son the way jason was#and early!tim makes a BIG POINT of how bruce is not his dad#and i think this relative distance from bruce is a huge factor in why dick is able to build a close relationship with tim at all#(because dick's still pretty estranged from bruce!)#and there's such interesting tension there when dick starts jokingly calling tim ''little brother'' or when villains call them brothers#because they're NOT. increasingly they would both LIKE to be brothers! but dick has zero official standing in tim's life#if tim got hit by a car in his civilian identity bruce and dick wouldn't even be able to visit him without his dad's permission#which jack would be pretty unlikely to give! jack doesn't like or trust bruce!#or like. this is morbid. but if tim died. dick wouldn't even be invited to the funeral you know?#and there's such interesting tension there for me in the contrast between this vigilante relationship that's very very close#but in their civilian lives no one would assume they're anything in particular to each other#anyway the 1st half of tim's robin solo has this thread of tension between tim's family life vs. his vigilante life (plus his mom's death)#and then the second half + red robin has the thread of struggling with grief in a world that's not fair + feeling lost/alone#and these two threads are a big part of my interest in tim as a character! jack's the backdrop that makes a lot of stories possible
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monty-glasses-roxy · 15 days
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BEHOLD!!!
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BRACHIOSAURUS FREDDY!!!
HE'S LIKE LONG CAT BUT UP!!
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kierancaz · 9 months
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what if elves were like super weird. can we make elves super weird? like yah they're still pretty and elegant all the things elves already are but what if they made weird noises to communicate like clicking and whistling and purring and what if there ears were like really long and could move and fluttered when they're happy and dropped when they were sad and you know how you can move your ears a little bit ?? yeah well elves can do that but just more bc there ears are longer and they have more movement control and stuff and what if they were also just like super weirdly flexible and can could turn there necks around like an owl and they were all double jointed in every joint and could just fold them selves in half and stuff
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Remember that time I mentioned that I needed to draw something other than Sgt Splosion?? (plus Guardener, my sona, and my ocs)
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varying quality doodles of mostly sgt splosion
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juliasgoodusername · 1 year
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Caught on the girlboss cam
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michaeljoncarter · 11 months
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i think a big part of the reason we're getting all these good characters turning into clones of their evil parents is that for some reason, everybody seems to hate just letting villains be villains. we've got all these fumbling attempts to soften/reframe/redeem some of the most iconic (& most of the time, deliberately irredeemably evil villains) to make them more palatable & likable & heroic
and that leaves this giant hole in the story where this iconic villain is supposed to be. so somebody's gotta fill that role, preferably somebody who's already got some sort of connection to the original, and oh, hey, if we randomly turn their kid whose entire character up to this point as been about refusing to follow in their footsteps into the new version of them, that would be, like, so unexpected! such a twist!
it's cheap and annoying and i hate it for sure, but at the same time, it might be my favorite trend ever just for how insanely funny it is to me that by making the ex-shitty parents (relatively) sympathetic and retroactively making their kids actually just evil incarnate, dc's unintentionally built a whole wave of "next gen" villains that are basically just the "what if the child had bad vibes" tweet but completely serious
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maellor · 1 year
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So i was rereading The Duel of Finrod and Sauron and i noticed something:
"... Then the gloom gathered: darkness growing
in Valinor, the red blood flowing
beside the sea, where the Gnomes slew
the Foamriders, and stealing drew
their white ships with their white sails
from lamplit havens..."
- Lay of Leithian
Calling the Falmari "foamriders" instead of "mariners" or something along those lines makes me think that, perhaps, they weren't only great shipwrights, mariners, fisherpeople etc.
They were surfers.
And then i can't help but imagine Finrod and his brothers surfing during their visits at Alqualonde. Perhaps the Arafinwians once dragged their cousins to Alqualonde to teach them how to surf (and to show off their own exquisite skills in it).
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bylertruther · 2 years
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i was doing my regular rewatch the other day and tbh... lonnie and will's relationship is so unsettling. lonnie literally did not give a single goddamn fuck that his own twelve year old son was missing and later "dead". he just... did not fucking care! at all. couldn't even pretend to. jonathan comes to tell him what happened and we see that...
lonnie got joyce's call and still didn't care to reach out,
when jonathan tells him this is serious and real, he mocks will by saying "he was never very good at taking care of himself" (which is already disturbing considering this is his son he's talking about, but especially so when you remember that lonnie abused will for being gay and tried to get him to like "masculine" things),
he's already talking to jonathan about seeing him more and reconnecting, like will isn't fucking missing, like he's already fucking dead and he's moved on, as if will is some stranger or worse someone that never existed at all,
instead of feeling any kind of shame about jonathan not believing him when he says will isn't there and him looking in the actual fucking trunk of his car, he just makes a joke out of it asking if jonathan's gonna check up his ass too,
his neglect is brought up again when jonathan slams one of the posters to his chest and tells him "in case you forgot what he looks like",
and that's not even touching on the fact that the very first thing we see lonnie do when jonathan enters the house is fucking shove and pin him to the wall, telling him "you got stronger".
like, he is not a good man in the slightest—the complete antithesis of the byers we know.
and then afterward... lonnie finally decides to come back. he's being nice to joyce and pretending like he's the man of the house again. like he's finally come home to fix and save his family.
he goes to will's funeral and treats it like a schmoozing event, like that isn't his youngest son being buried right in front of him, showing less emotion than one of will's classmates that hasn't ever even talked to him.
but... he's not there because he's had a sudden change of heart.
no, he's there because he has something to gain out of this unimaginable tragedy. his own youngest son is dead and he comes back home to collect a fucking check for it. because he's never cared about will, hasn't ever even seen him as a human being, he just... sees his death as something he can benefit from.
it's just so fucked up and so sinister. lonnie isn't a man riddled with vices, beholden to some disease which makes him act in ways most unbecoming. no, he's... just a man. a small, manipulative, and cruel leech of a man that just doesn't fucking care and is in it only for himself.
it's just... it's really tragic to think that will really was dealing with monsters way before that first demogorgon ever came through the gate.
and even then... that demogorgon was an animal acting as animals do / possessed by vecna and you can't really blame it for that. but what's lonnie's excuse, huh?
#like. hashtag felt lmao#a lot of ppl write lonnie as an alcoholic and i feel like ... lonnie just being a bad person because he Is a bad person without the help of#any vices is just... so much more terrifying and painful.#because then it's just lonnie. just a man who doesn't care about his son. a man who views his baby boy as less than a bug. a man who#doesn't care or hold any affection in his heart because he just simply does not fucking want to or care to. he doesn't care if will is in#danger. he doesn't care if will is dead at the bottom of the quarry. he doesn't care not because he's drunk or high but just.. because.#he couldn't turn will into what he thinks is a proper man so in his mind he's thinking well.. if i can't get anything out of him like that#then i'm at least gonna get my money's worth with this wrongful death case.#a man making the choice to be evil. to inflict pain purposely. for no gain whatso-fucking-ever.#bc at least vecna does it to gain more power to achieve world domination. but lonnie is just a piece of shit that abuses kids.#water is wet lmao but... i feel like stranger things manages to be so fucking dark sometimes and yet it just... it's treated so normally#that you almost don't even notice it. bc ur just viewing this story from the perspective of a character and for them it IS normal#i just. yeah. idk. Thinking Thotz Over Here#it's so fucked up when u stop to think abt it lmao like. if will doesn't get his happy ending bro.......#abuse tw#byers#lonnie#mine
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earlgodwin · 7 months
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dysfunctional families, generational traumas and a self-loathing father who sees himself in his son and cannot forgive him for it. this show really went off with all the top-tier themes lol truly unmatched.
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that being said, what cesare doesn't realize is that despite his father 'favoring' juan, it's cesare whom his father truly trusts. sadly, it took cesare killing juan for rodrigo to set him free from being a cleric. if he only knew that his father plainly relies on him and has plans something ultimately much greater, cesare wouldn't have envied and hated his younger brother, and things wouldn't have led to juan's death.
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rodrigo made cesare believe that he wasn't truly loved by him when in reality, he does love cesare immensely and admires him for his drive and ambition. however, rodrigo chose to be self-deluded and ashamed of admitting it. he appointed juan a task that cesare has always wanted, despite knowing well that cesare is infinitely better suited for it. this resulted in cesare developing a strong hatred and envy toward juan.
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as for juan's case, he never asked for the position he was given, but he tried his best to fulfill his responsibilities. (like when he showed bravery by willingly risking his life against the french, even after his troops were torn apart, but only surrendered because the prospect of him dying would upset lucrezia) despite his father's love, juan felt deeply isolated because he never had a peer. he was good natured and had a deep love for his family, and all he wanted was to be included in their world. however, he struggled immensely in expressing his feelings, which led to him being shunned and his death going unmourned. it is tragic because ultimately he longed to feel like a 'true' borgia and have a close relationship with his family, especially with cesare. but the lack of moral guidance and the weight of expectations pushed him to behave inappropriately, resulting in everyone pushing him away.
in conclusion, rodrigo was too blinded by his own ambitions and dismissed his children's concerns it's why i can't bring myself to blame neither of them, they were all trapped by their father's ambitions and favoritism, he was the one who unintentionally pit them against each other by making both of his sons feel inadequate in the positions he bestowed upon them.
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egipci · 1 year
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