#empathy fatigue

[sizzlingsandwichperfection-blog]

I just read the article you posted a while back about TB (heads up- it said the gift article link has lapsed or some such). Did J&J ‘evergreen’ (be allowed to be evil) or was it allowed to become generic?

Relatedly, how do you manage empathy fatigue? I deal with OCD too and it screams at me that I have to care about and do all the things all at once. How do you choose where to put your time and energy?

(Also, when I get the coffee subscription for my husband’s birthday, which version should I get?)

For me empathy fatigue sets in when I careen my attention from this crisis to that one to the next one to the one after that, always feeling overwhelmed by each emerging problem but never having the time or attention to devote myself to one problem or another.

I'll give you an example. In 2014, a horrific ebola epidemic swept through Guinea, Liberia, and Sierra Leone. The world paid attention to it. Everyone was talking about it. And then .... it ended. At least in the global imagination. Money dried up. The world moved on to the next crisis.

That's not to say the next crisis wasn't important. It was important. But in Sierra Leone, the ebola crisis wasn't really over even after people stopped contracting ebola. 15% of Sierra Leone's healthcare workers had been killed by ebola, and the already fragile healthcare system plummeted into what one Sierra Leonean physician described to me as "a state of collapse."

And so the crisis remained a crisis even after the world's attention shifted. 1 in 17 women in Sierra Leone were dying in childbirth. Over 10% of kids born died before the age of five. Tuberculosis killed thousands every year despite curative treatment being available.

And this is when Hank and I finally, belatedly realized that responding to crises in the news was not adequate. Instead, we would need to commit the kind of long-term attention and long-term support that long-term crises demand. This means making difficult choices--there is also high maternal and child mortality in countries other than Sierra Leone, but we choose to focus on Sierra Leone because we see an opportunity to make a difference, because the government is serious if limited in its commitment to improving healthcare and educational opportunities, and because we had to make a choice or else we would be overwhelmed by the many causes.

What about the other causes? Well, we trust people to work on those causes. We believe in their importance. And we support their work by doing ours as well as we can, and trusting they are doing theirs as well as they can. I still get overwhelmed. I still get depressed. But I find that the deeper I go into my particular areas of interest--global healthcare delivery, health care accessibility, ending TB, fighting maternal mortality--the better I feel personally, and the more good I feel like I'm able to do.

2. Johnson & Johnson has not abandoned their secondary patents on bedaquiline but they have committed to allow generics to be available in most countries, even those where the secondary patents apply. Unfortunately this deal leaves out many countries that need generic bedaquiline, including Ukraine, which is absolutely unacceptable. So progress has been made, but the progress (as is so often the case) is inadequate. The fight goes on.

#tuberculosis #global health #partners in health #empathy fatigue

[whump-about-it]

Someone You Deserve

@whumpril Day 9: Self Doubt

CW: angst, empathy fatigue, conditioned whumpee

Whumpee was already asleep when Caretaker got home from work. Curled up on the couch in a nest of blankets and pillows and a tear stained face as they snored softly in contest with the low drone of the tv show they'd fallen asleep watching. They had a bed, but they preferred to sleep anywhere else. Too comfortable they had told Caretaker, I don't deserve it.

Caretaker sighed and took their shoes off quietly, so as not to disturb Whumpee's slumber. If they woke up they would be a mess of apologies for not being awake to greet Caretaker at the door, and Caretaker wasn't in the mood to talk them off another metaphorical ledge tonight. Anyway, Whumpee almost never slept this soundly.

A cold meal Caretaker had asked Whumpee not to make sat on the kitchen table. Caretaker realized with a pang that they had forgotten to tell Whumpee they would be home late tonight. No wonder they were on the couch. No wonder their face was tear streaked and splotchy from crying themselves to sleep.

Caretaker slumped in a kitchen chair and put their head in their hands. How could I be so stupid? They shivered at the thought of Whumpee cooking for them, cleaning, getting ready for the two of them to eat together once Caretaker had gotten home. Had they been excited? Did they hum to themselves as they cut the carrots? Dance around the kitchen while they waited for the oven to preheat? How long had they waited before they realized Caretaker wasn't coming home? Had their food gone cold too? Had they cried at the kitchen table? Wondering if it was something they had done that was keeping Caretaker away?

After a minute Caretaker stood up and went back to the living room, intending to wake Whumpee up and apologize, but they paused in the doorway realizing they didn't even know what they wanted to apologize for. Coming home late? Forgetting to call? For being the worst possible person for Whumpee to rely on?

The doctors had said that it wouldn't be easy. Whumpee's recovery would be slow, and Caretaker needed to have patience, for both of them. But this couldn't have been what they meant. It had been months and Whumpee had barely made any progress. They still rarely spoke if not asked to. They jumped at the slightest moves. And had even called Caretaker "Master" a few times, which made Caretaker's blood run cold just to think about.

Surely Whumpee deserved better than this. Caretaker was falling woefully short of providing what Whumpee needed and they were so far behind they didn't even know what they were doing wrong. Apologizing wasn't going to solve any of that.

Caretaker sighed again and turned back into the kitchen. Tears pricking at their eyes from their anger about their own woeful inadequacy at caring for their friend. They were exhausted, and in a bad mood. It was probably best that Whumpee didn't see them like this. Instead Caretaker scrapped their cold meal into the trash and poured a glass of water, bringing it into the living room and placing it on the coffee table in front of Whumpee as a peace offering for when they woke up. Finally Caretaker placed a small kiss on the top of Whumpee's head before going to their own bedroom, resolving to call in sick tomorrow and spending the day trying to be the person Whumpee deserved.

#whump #whumpril #whumpril2024 #whumprilday9 #self doubt #whumpee x caretaker #whump drabble #tw angst #empathy fatigue #recovering whumpee #conditioned whumpee

[starlight-tav]

One of the things I really struggle with when it comes to being autistic is the rapid changes in my ability to empathize based on how dysregulated and/or overstimulated I am.

If I'm in a relatively neutral place, I over-empathize with the people and objects around me. But if I'm dysregulated or spiraling towards meltdown/shutdown, my ability to empathize is completely lost. I become hyper-critical and I cannot begin to fathom why people are doing things the way they're doing them.

I get so angry. Uncontrollably so. But my body shuts down completely. I go stone cold and lock up. But my thoughts are loud and vitriolic. I hate this. I hate it so much. It makes me feel like a monster. It makes me feel trapped.

#tw: internalized ableism #autistic adult #autism spectrum disorder #autistic #asd #autism #empathy #empathy fatigue

[lookingforabook]

#tumblarians #burnout #emotional labor #librarian #empathy fatigue

[mynameisakissi]

#comics #mini comic #art #my art #illustration #i love colors #ink #black ink #socializing #i am not a therapist #advice #empathy fatigue #energy drain #i have problems too #caregiver #oversharing #venting #empathy #understanding #trauma dumping

[allthenamesaretaken18]

mfs be all sad and shit and come to me but like, bro i cant convince you that life is worth living im too empathetic for that shit yk, ill just agree lol

#empathy fatigue #ha ha funny

[emberintayson]

Let’s see what posting a link from TikTok looks like. Maybe you are suffering from empathy fatigue. Maybe you’re feeling burned out. Maybe you’re feeling hopeless. Take a break and rekindle that inner flame. You have to tend your hearts flame. The world needs you, and you need you.

#self care #empathy fatigue #empathy #abandon biden #tiktok #texas #christianity #introvert activism #activism #introvert #Revolutionary hope #radical hope #save palestine #save rafah #words heal #cheng-tozun #social justice

[catocomet]

nobody is more tired of war than those living through it. shut the fuck up and hear them

#palestine #free palestine #gaza #free gaza #“empathy fatigue” SHUT UP #SHUT UPPPP do you HEAR yourself jesus lord #falastin #gaza strip #israel #genocide #expose israel #free falasteen #ofc also cannot forgot #congo genocide #dr congo #free congo #save congo #silent genocide #free sudan #sudan crisis #sudan #keep eyes on sudan #sudan genocide #eyes on sudan #ukraine #russia is a terrorist state #stand with ukraine

[weirdcheeks]

What if I said that the powers that be are weaponizing our empathy against us?

That we will deny the nature of science and reality, and actual, real life mercy and kindness, and all in the pursuit of being seen as "empathetic"?

#false empathy #empathy fatigue #empathy #things are backwards #amd social engineering is real #but trust that it isn't for our good

[bobsuxs]

I’m really exhausted of having hard conversations and deep talks

#shits draining #empathy fatigue #but I’m glad I’m helping #but tired #me #text #text post #personal #I feel extremely alone

[dcwellnessinc]

#Empathy Fatigue #Stress Disorder

[yutaholic]

Thank you for even making that post because I honestly feel like I’m going to explode!! Championing every issue is EXHAUSTING. I have such empathy fatigue. Bombardment of “rules”, behavioral guidelines, services, companies, networks + food brands & PEOPLE to boycott ALL THE TIME. Fandom is space many of us come to unplug from reality…it’s certainly my hyperfixation & ppl be like “well then get another one because you shouldn’t support–” IT DOESN’T WORK LIKE THAT. Fuck. I can’t take it anymore. Calls to action being in EVERY single place have weakened my mental state even more than it was before which was already on “pending disability” level of severe & now I’m just. burned t-absolute-f out….at everything!! I can literally FEEL myself unraveling. Kpop stans & their toxic activism can go to hell. They’re so worried about making sure to condemn others for “not doing enough” or being bad people, that they don’t even realize their actions are making them into bad people. This shit takes a toll on mental health, there is science behind this, it is real and what happens to human beings when inundated with constant terrible news, and it’s not just being ~too privileged to care~ but these performative mfs have no concept of blacklisting anymore and just want to assume the absolute worst about someone, call them names & wish harm on folks who are at the end of their ropes! It’s maddening! So even if compassion fatigue isn’t why you didn’t go out of your way to Denounce and Drag™️ him (bc you totally have the right to simply not want to do that on a fanfic blog!) I’m just glad someone else stated that this is supposed to be an ESCAPE. fuck.

Baby, burnout will fuck you up. Don't do that to yourself. Take the time you need and recoup. Life is a constant war and you can afford to lose a battle here and there to focus on your own health and well-being. Getting yourself back into a good place mentally will be a huge win. We both know the ppl obsessed with performative activism aren't doing anything from a place of compassion. The real ones are out there making change, not sending people death threats online from the comfort and safety of their mommy's basement.

When I posted the pic of NCT Dream and Big Time Rush, I wrote in the tags how BTR was something my sister and I loved and bonded over. We watched the show even though it was obviously a kids show and we were both adults. It was just something that gave us joy. My sister passed away years ago and anything BTR-related will make me teary because I think about how much we laughed together over it.

So the first thing I get are messages over how problematic BTR is, that I should delete the post or I'm pro-genocide if I don't dislike them. Ngl that made me so upset because I got a bunch of faceless people trying to taint some precious memories of me and my sister. If they came at me trying to educate me on things I didn't know that would be different, but it's straight to judgment and hatred toward me over something I posted that was totally innocent.

Meanwhile I get criticized for posting about a kpop group instead of reblogging every call to action post. I donate my money to these causes, but I don't post about it because I don't need my ass kissed for doing what I know to be right. I am 1000% sure the anons in my inbox that try to police me have never given a dime to anything, but are policing people's blogs for not reblogging posts or talking about it more.

I feel bad that I haven't been very active on here this year so I try to come on when I have some free time to interact with you guys. I make a silly post about Doyoung and get anons tearing into me for it like I'm his social media manager. Okay so because the world is going to shit we aren't allowed to enjoy anything?? Can't make jokes about anything. Can't show support for anything. Just wrong on every fucking count.

Believe me I am so goddamn aware of how lucky I am that I can sit here and say I'm very privileged that I live comfortably in the life I have. I know what's going on in the world and I do my part to help where I can, but I also have to keep functioning. I don't want every minute of my life to be seeped in anger, I did that for a long time and it not only eats away at you, it makes you ineffective in actually changing the things making you angry in the first place.

This was just supposed to be a blog where I posted my stories. One of the few places I could go and not constantly be reminded of how fucked up the world is. I've always said that people who told me reading a fic of mine made their day a little better or helped them escape for a bit were always my favorite. That was what I came here for and I loved being able to share the tiniest moments of peace and quiet with others through stories with guaranteed happy endings.

I'm frustrated because I have 4 drafts ready to go next year. I got the story posts done and made all the headers. But I don't want to post them. I have no problem admitting I'm selfish and spiteful. Even though I can turn off anon, I can't block these miserable people and I don't want them reading my stuff. They don't get to consume my content and then tell me to off myself right after.

A massive fuck you to those of you that ruined this blog for me.

#empathy fatigue is real #and the reason these shitheads arent getting tired #is because theyre not doing any of it from empathy

[spurgie-cousin]

i've felt a lot of guilt lately for feeling the impulse to skip any content i see about the absolutely horrifying things happening to Palestinians (i don't, but lately i can't deny that i have the urge to) and the guilt i think originally came from assuming that i was feeling that way bc of empathy fatigue or whatever that fucking buzzword is that sometimes gets people off the hook for caring

but upon reflection i think it has more to do with the fact that as far as the limits of what I can do to help people, i've reached it, and i will keep giving as much as i can, but every time i hear another story knowing i am doing all i can but that it's not going to make anything stop, i start to think about all the people who COULD be helping. like the people with millions of dollars in spare change who could even charter a plane if they wanted to, or who could buy 20 million Sim cards without it affecting them in any way, or the people with so much influence on Western society that they could make one tweet and probably shift the popular political opinion in multiple countries.

and i will never stop paying attention to Palestinians and i will never not do what i can to help them but if i do have any kind of fatigue, it's a direct result of knowing so many people who could make a difference just won't because it might lose them some followers or cut their bottom line by 10% when they already have more money than God and like that is just........ that is a very infuriating and depressing reality to have to live with on a day to day basis. it is a literal genocide and people are thinking about the "optics" of saying a genocide is bad like........ oh.....my fucking GOD

#palestine #genocide cw #rereading this back im not denying empathy fatigue is a thing i was a little harsh there but i so believe some people use it as an excuse to #hide their heads in the sand

[grenade-cephalopod]

Palestine is being massacred, and it's important to condemn the companies that are funding the suffering through boycotts and action. That being said, you are not a failure if you are experiencing boycott fatigue or you have to purchase a boycotted product for whatever reason. We live in consumerist societies, and unfortunately it is very hard to fully separate yourself from major corporations. You should shop local and sustainable when you can, but there are things, like medication (Pfizer is on the list) that you have to bite the bullet on. Remember, any positive action counts. Boycotts do work. They can't use your money to warmonger if you don't give it to them. Divided we beg for peace, but together we bargain for a better tomorrow.

#Palestine #boycott israel #Boycott Fatigue #pfizer #boycott disney #boycott starbucks #boycott mcdonalds #empathy #free palestine

[no-empathy-culture-is]

hi! this isn’t a low empathy culture is ask, I’m just hoping you’d be able to help me out. I think one of my friends is low empathy, this is the first time I’m really hearing of this term but reading through your blog it does seem similar to what they experience. is there anything that you would recommend me doing/researching for learning how to be a better friend to someone with low empathy?

don’t feel pressured to answer this. ik how exhausting it can be for ppl to expect you to explain everything related to groups you’re apart of/disabilities you have but I thought this blog might be a good place to start :)

the biggest thing, off the top of my head, is that people with low/no empathy often desire to comfort their friends, but don't know how. someone with low/no empathy won't be feeling what you're feeling, so might not understand that you're angry and not sad, etc. additionally, we're not likely to approach something emotively because we're not experiencing emotion related to it. the fastest way to stop feeling bad over a situation is to remove yourself from the situation, which usually results in low/no empathy people suggesting logical ways to deal with a situation, when you 1. wanted to be comforted emotionally, 2. can't/don't want to leave the situation (for any reason) and/or 3. don't consider it a big deal, and are just complaining about something small.

ways to circumvent this are to clarify what you want, and what's comforting for you - you might want a hug, or to be reminded that it's okay to feel upset over things, or just for them to acknowledge the situation sucks. when venting or complaining, it's good to clarify if you want comfort, a solution or just to be listened to.

another thing is that low/no empathy people might put in an effort to be empathetic towards you, but not towards people they don't know/don't care about. this often isn't because they don't believe these people are deserving of empathy, but rather that performing empathy is a thing that we need to consciously think about, rather than something we do automatically.

additionally, if a low/no empathy person performs empathy towards you, this isn't them lying to or manipulating you (although you definitely don't seem to believe this, it might feel like it sometimes). imo it's honestly a compliment, that they're taking the energy and brainspace to do something that they don't normally do.

there's not much else that i can think of - followers, if you have anything to add feel free to do so!

#mod gabriel #not culture #i promise ill get around to posting the culture asks soon-ish #fatigue's been hellish lately #also anon i dont mind taking questions from people who have standard relation modes! (i.e 'normal' empathy/sympathy/compassion) #even if the question is super rude ill still answer it

[youareallowedchips]

how do you know if you're Actually Being Nice or if you're just Being Nice So People Think You're A Nice Person

think abt this all the time

like how much of my niceness is being Performative and how much of it is just being Genuinely Kind And Decent

Autism Thoughts

#actually autistic #autism #vent post? #i guess #rubyposting #autism tag #i am confused #ive also had a lot of empathy fatigue recently so its like #shit #lol #lmaooo #love it