#he doesn't have to!

[castiel-left-his-mark-on-me]

What I want to know is WHY?

Why'd you say it, Jensen? You didn't have to. You were talking about cooking for fuck's sake! COOKING!! You said you like spicy food-- and that your wife often makes you spicy food.

How great.

How wholesome.

Sure, you kinked it up a bit. You went on to say that she knows how to "spice things up in the kitchen."

Ha Ha

*wink wink * nudge nudge*

And Misha of course responded in his very Misha-like-way with -- "Oh yeah she does!"

So you go "Ayye!" in your trademarked Dean-ish, mock-grumpy tone.

And that was fine.

That was all good, Jensen. You could've left it there, son! You could've gone back to the fucking innocuous topic of cooking.

Go on and share Danneel's recipe. Maybe your favorite spice while you're at it. Or even just go back to saying Italian words in your very Mario & Luigi type accent ... any of that would've worked, my guy.

The world is filled with non-implicating topics!

But NOOOOO .... instead you take a fucking eon-long pause, rub your thigh in the universally known nervous-jackles way, and then you say:

"SHE DOES REFER TO MISHA AS HER BOYFRIEND"????

and then

AAANNDDD THEN

ANNNNDDD THEN YOU SAY

"WHICH IS FUNNY 'CAUSE SO DO I????"

YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT COOKING, SIR!!!

COOKING!

MOTHER FUCKING COOKING!

#Cockles #Jensen Ackles #Misha Collins #JIB11 #JIB2023 #This has been the inside of my brain all day #WHY DOES HE DO THESE THINGS?!!! #HE DOESN'T HAVE TO! #HE HAS 34000 LOGICAL ROUTES TO TAKE WITH ANY TRAIN OF THOUGHT #AND HE TAKES THE ONE DIRECTLY INTO MISHA'S ASSHOLE EVERY FUCKING TIME

[demigods-posts]

would love it if the last god/goddess percy has to do a quest for is hestia. and all she only asks of him a simple, easy-to-do, done in two minutes task. and then that's it. no tricks or double meanings. and he just sobs into her shoulder at the end of it. and she just holds him and tells him that he's all done. he can go live his life now.

#*percy sobbing profusely into hestia's shoulder* #*hestia giving him and annabeth a blessings that'll ensure he doesn't have to deal with her siblings bullshit ever again* #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo text post #pjo #pjo headcanon #percy jackson

[bunnieswithsunglasses]

When Lucifer is hanging out at his palace and can't get a moment's peace...

#lucifer hazbin hotel #cursed cat alastor #my art #this took way too long #he doesn't have a belly button because he was never a human change my mind

[icestorming]

- oh.

#hazbin hotel #angel dust #husker hazbin hotel #huskerdust #cherry bomb #my art #i will never again draw Husk doing cat things because he doesn't like it and I respected a furry #i did this 2 days ago I AM A CLOWN #I have so many ideas I am full of shit

[mrghostrat]

who am i to refuse a warmup crowley meme

#he lost his best friend </3 #twice </3 #yes i know his jacket doesn't have buttons but how else am i supposed to fit in excruciatingly subtle Fry & Laurie references without them #and yes those colours are intentional uwu thanks The Used #good omens #gomens #anthony j crowley #crowley #good omens art #rat draws #good omens meme

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone #yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post. #writeblr #ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person #and on this blog we support workers. #at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going. #when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens #have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists #and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like. #it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases - #at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory. #it was what i had seen. #and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference #we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol' #so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender #and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID. #he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different #i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.

[lazylittledragon]

dorian and astarion obtain a Son

#bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #astarion #tav #tavstarion #i think i'm getting the hang of his stupid face #too tired to colour today sorry #pet shops are Out letting your ranger bring home a feral goblin is in #he doesn't have a name yet so i'm taking suggestions

[moxley]

having halsin as a companion and party member is very funny because none of this shit is his problem he just likes you so much

#tal.png #halsin #baldur's gate 3 #HE DOESN'T HAVE A TADPOLE HE COULD JUST GO. HE COULD JUST MIND HIS OWN BUSINESS #ME MAKING HIM FIGHT A NETHERBRAIN: BABE ARE YOU HAVING A GOOD TIME?

[guardian-of-da-gay]

eventual Mama's boy

#knuckles the echidna #knuckles wachowski #my art #maddie wachowski #sonic fanart #sonic the movie 2 #scu #knuckles headcanons #the headcanon is that he takes a while to warm up to his new parents #boy doesn't know how to be parented #another hc: #he doesn't have a fight or flight response #it's just fight #so when he's freaked out you gotta be careful

[pineapple-frenzy]

Book 2 au: sparring sessions and short hair katara

They like to have sparring sessions in order to keep their bending skills sharp. They allow themselves to go all out and not hold back at all cause they know if anyone got hurt, Katara could just heal them

But anyways, wouldn't it be kinda funny if Zuko accidentally burned Katara's hair tho? Aofkqldkkajfjd

The "I think we can save the hairloops" line is from @linnoya-writes thank you for that!! :>>

#zutara #zuko #katara #atla #book 2 au #my art #i mentioned in my last book 2 au post that i wanted to include short hair katara into it and y'all were so supportive of it!! 😭😭😭 #so this is how i think it would go #it would happen as katara is trying to evade one of zuko's fire balls #she manages to avoid it but since her hair is long it still caught on fire #she'd be pissed so she water whips the hell out of zuko #and then promptly forgets about it akfhkakdkakdj #even after the sparring session she still hasn't remembered cause 'oh no zuko's in pain i have to help him!' #it isn't until zuko even mentions it that she remembers #zuko thinks she's more calm than i thought she would be after burning her hair so he mentions it to her #little did he know katara just forgor aldjlakdkaljd #n e ways zuko does feel bad so she offers to help fix it up for her #i think after the haircut katara would find herself looking in mirrors when there are any around cause 'zuko thinks i'm beautiful?? really? #zuko doesn't know this tho and he thinks katara is till sad about the unwanted haircut so he keeps telling her that she looks beautiful #and katara just keeps losing it aldjlakdlald #in conclusion they are idiots your honor

[bet-on-me-13]

Vampire Misunderstanding

So! Danny got adopted by Bruce Wayne, but he doesn't know that Bruce is the Batman. He is just supernaturally oblivious to all things Batman related going on in the House.

But he does notice that Bruce leaves home a lot at night, that he doesn't like to go out in the day and often has his parties at night, and once or twice he's caught Bruce with a bit if blood still splattered on his cheek.

So he comes to the only plausible conclusion. Bruce is a Vampire.

He starts trying to hint at the fact that he knows, but doesn't want to just go out and say it. What if Bruce reacts negatively to him knowing? He's dealt with enough Supernatural Beings to know that they don't like other people (and especially other supernatural beings) intruding on their lives.

So Danny decided to subtly hint at it.

He started asking questions like "So hypothetically, how would you deal with having a Garlic Allergy in Gotham?" Or "So if you had very sensitive skin that could sunburn extremely easily, how much cloud cover would you need to go outside?" And "So what's your opinion on a High-Iron Diet?"

Basically just tossing out questions and trying to Guage Bruce's reaction.

He thinks he's doing a good job!

...

Bruce is certain that he has adopted a Vampire.

Danny is a good kid, but he has a few oddities that are hard to ignore.

For one, his skin is constantly Ice Cold, but he never seens to be bothered by it. As if he was an Undead that didn't require Body Heat anymore.

He also seems to like Hanging out in the Graveyard outside, and when asked about it he says that he is comforted by the place. Just like the Vampires he has met in the past, who feel comfortable when surrounded by Death.

And of course the biggest reason for suspicion is the fact that Danny seems to be hinting at it to him.

He keeps asking stuff like "How would you deal with a Garlic Allergy in Gotham?", probably trying to hint that he is a Vampire who can't eat Garlic, or asking about easy to sunburn skin, saying that he is probably not a Daywalker.

Bruce hopes Danny will just come clean about it soon, he doesn't want to intrude upon the kid when he is so obviously nervous about how he will react.

#Dpxdc #Dp x dc #Dcxdp #Dc x dp #Danny Phantom #Dc #Dcu #Danny thinks Bruce is a Vampire #Bruce thinks Danny is a Vampire #Misunderstandings #Danny is nervous about it because he has a bad experience with Vampires (vlad) #Bruce is nervous because he doesn't want to push Danny away #The Fenton Parents are still alive #They just lost custody of Danny after a CPS worker stumbled upon Amity and had an aneurysm #Jazz is off to college #Though idk if she went to Gotham U or some other College in a safer part of the country #Coincidentally neither Danny or Bruce actually like Garlic #And they both like to stay indoors #And both of them have caught the other with drops of blood on their faces and/or clothes #Idk where the other Batkids are #Maybe Danny was the first kid adopted by Bruce in this timeline? #Or the others are just coincidentally not in thr house at the moment

[seldompathic]

I really shouldn't listen to Snapcube when I draw

#sonic the hedgehog #sth #sonic art #shadow the hedgehog #remember- he doesn't want his highlights called gay in a derogatory way #so now hes gonna have to disappear Sonic AND the US president #that oughtta teach em a lesson #(((I'm gay and its a Dub joke please dont flame me LMFAO)))

[clementineskesh]

the best thing about benoit blanc's clearly established emotional intelligence is knowing with 100% certainty that he did everything in his power to hurt miles bron's feelings on purpose

#like. icon #glass onion #making fun of the puzzle box? solving the mystery? having a wide-eyed condescension like he doesn't know what he's doing? #not to mention blatanlty insulting him and also baiting him into big speeches where he'd embarrass himself. #blanc knows what he's doing and what he's doing is making this little bitch cry

[bumbleboa]

today's stream was just comfort zone sketching, so here's a bunch of busts!

#one piece #cat burglar nami #nico robin #roronoa zoro #monkey d luffy #trafalgar law #usopp #if we ignore the clearly self indulgent reasons for Law not wearing a shirt #chat and I agreed that the strawhats stole his shirts #and that's why he doesn't have one #my art

[aloeverified]

for anyone who loved hobie/spiderpunk in the new movie, please know that his best friend is an indigenous gay man who goes by captain anarchy (the person he's kissing is that universe's rick jones).

and that he's also friends/allies with his universe's ironheart, ms marvel, and daredevil.

also his symbiote is his dog.

anyways, stan spiderpunk. hobart brown you will always be famous to me.

#i like how they have him call himself spiderpunk in the movie because in the comics he doesn't like it #but i always thought it was fun when all the heroes have their own little names #across the spiderverse #spiderverse #hobart brown #hobbie brown #spiderpunk #spider punk #aloeverants

[wasyago]

various tango doodles

#hermitcraft #tangotek #my art #sketch #i love drawing human tango so much you guys have no idea.... he's just. he's so... but the creature one is still the most favorite. #also the 3rd sketch of him with glasses..... don't think im gonna draw him with glasses anymore it just doesn't look right #idk why. maybe the forehead being covered or the fact that he doesn't have ears or something. it's just... no #in other news. im really enjoying drawing him with a bit of facial hair! it just adds that little bit of character and maturity #he looks less like a baby and i think that's a good thing #all my previous fanarts now look bald tho 😭