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cherry-interlude · 3 years

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Lana Del Rey Album Songs Ranking (Remade)

It’s been a few years since I ranked all of Lana’s (album) songs so I wanted to do it again. This is all my OPINION, which I’m sure some people might disagree with, but you don’t have to agree with it. This is also a very long post.

Don’t Let Me Be Misunderstood

This cover song is just a little too drab and uninteresting to me, and I never listen to it. After the brilliant, sprawling, sexy, heart-breaking tracks on Honeymoon, this feels like a tacked-on track just to plump up the album. It feels simply like a cover.

For Free

Though this is a well-made song, with three brilliant women owning the track, it again just feels like a cover. It fits in well with Chemtrails, but by the time I get to this song I’ve had my fill.

Breaking Up Slowly

It just feels repetitive and simple, something only to have on in the background while my attention is diverted. It’s a good song and a nice attempt at bringing Lana’s country music in, but it does little to keep me interested.

God Knows I Tried

This song is filler. Jammed between the jazzy softness of Terrence Loves You and the pop favourite High By The Beach, this track just feels like it was sort of shoved in. It doesn’t even feel completely right on Honeymoon, instead a throwaway song that bridges Ultraviolence and Honeymoon whilst not fitting in with either album.

Though perfect for the credits of a Hollywood movie, 24 has plenty of flair but nothing of substance. The lyrics aren’t as imaginative as most of Lana’s music and I’m not surprised this song found itself near the end of the album.

Lucky Ones

Personally, this song irritates me. It's sickly in its lyrics, sugary in the romance and classic Lana tropes of dangerous men and Lana starstruck by them no matter if they’re ‘careless cons and crazy liars’. The little flair of the verses and the overtly sweet chorus really irks me, especially following the brilliance that is Lana’s first ‘Del Rey’ album.

Coachella

It is a rushed track, sounding completely unfinished and hurried with an unconvincing track beat. Polished, it would be brilliant – but it sounds like Lana thought of the song (which sounds promising in the video where she sits in the forest and sings) and had to force it to ‘fit in’ with the trap-pop tracks on Lust For Life. The lyrics are thoughtful, if not cliché, but it could have been done better.

This Is What Makes Us Girls

It just doesn’t appeal to me. Maybe because I can’t connect to the lyrics in any way, I just don’t feel anything when I hear this song and choose to skip it. That being said, the demos are pretty fun.

God Bless America

As much as it’s a song honouring women during a period of time when feminism was being shaken, it doesn’t quite feel like Lana’s heart is in it. The patriotism is uneasy considering she was removing herself from the American flag and its associations, and the anthemic feel never lifts. It’s a sweet song, but never goes deeper than surface level.

Religion

Though fairly sexy and haunting – her unshaken faith to her man, her drawling voice – this delicate track is too simple and sombre for me to get completely into it. I always want to skip and get to my favourites.

In My Feelings

It’s great Lana has a bad-girl, bad-bitch, fuck-you pop track but this, like Coachella, feels unfinished. It has the vibe of work in progress, and the vocals are still messy (surely intentionally, though it doesn’t always come across that way) as well as trying slightly too hard. It doesn’t compare to Fucked My Way Up To The Top.

Beautiful People Beautiful Problems

The verses don’t match up to the choruses and I feel nothing – not empowered or emotional – when listening to this song, but it is a beautiful duet between Lana and Stevie. Their voices really are divine together and though I don’t listen to this song much, the demos are even better.

Change

Mostly because it freaks me out, this is a song I don’t often listen to. With a basic structure yet long, meandering lyrics, Lana broods over the state of America at the time, which can make for depressive listening. Though it’s a pretty enough song, it’s seriousness is too much to bear sometimes.

Blue Velvet

Sometimes too slow, Blue Velvet doesn’t inspire multiple listens in me, but it is a gorgeous cover and absolutely a showcase of Lana’s vocals.

Diet Mountain Dew

A cheeky little track that won many over, it still is hard for me to fully get into it. However, it ages like fine wine and is a wonderful step into the Lizzy Grant unreleased tracks (especially with the many, sometimes even better demos).

Burning Desire

It’s a messy song, with Lana’s vocals shaky and the instrumental not quite up to scratch, but this song is certainly a guilty pleasure and great for getting into the sexy mood. The car metaphors are a bit much, especially considering it’s for a car advert, but if you get past that it’s a song to add to your freaky playlist.

Money Power Glory

As powerful and dark as this song is, with incredible instrumentals and Lana at her most dynamic, I barely remember the lyrics of the verses, instead waiting for the rich choruses.

Swan Song

A gentle track that has a lot of untapped power behind it, this is a quiet stormer of a song that has a lot of heart and grace. It may be a filler track, but it is definitely better than some.

Bartender

Even more gentle is the confessional, piano-led Bartender, which is a sweet little love song stripped back much like Lana’s simple romance where she sneaks out to see her lover. The main (and probably ridiculous) thing that keeps me from falling in love with this song more – though I’m already pretty amazed by it – is the very quiet sound of feedback that comes and goes, a fuzzy noise that is very subtle but distracting enough for me.

The Next Best American Record

This song would be higher if it was Architecture – the gorgeous, well-thought stunner that wowed us all when it was leaked. The lyrics are less fractured relationship and more wishy washy, wiping away the gritty sadness that made Architecture so beloved (at least to me). Now it’s been made ‘happier’, it’s hard to tell what the song is – is Lana happy with her lover or is she sad like in the unreleased version? Is this a break up song or a celebration of the romance? What does it mean now that it is both of them that are obsessed with writing? It’s something for me to certainly explore more, but it is paled in comparison to the original.

When The World Was At War

This track grew on me, with the hidden lyrics, fun vocals and hopeful message. Lana knows how to make a song that lifts your mood and this is certainly one of them.

Guns and Roses

I used to despise this song – finding it boring and dull. However, after giving it a listen years later, it is in fact a beautiful song with a gritty feel that is perfect for Ultraviolence. It fits in perfectly with the album and the extended tracks, and though it isn’t the strongest lyrically, the vocals and dreamy feel is thrilling.

Lolita

I choose to listen to this song without the underage character – or romantic connotations of her – in mind, instead seeing this song as a grown woman trying to charm an older man. However, as I have grown older – and read (and loved) the book several times more – I feel more inclined to distance myself from this song. It’s a fun, perky pop track but it definitely feels dated.

Dance Till We Die

Lana sings of her connection to other famous female singers and her daughter’s chosen name, making this a very personal pop song that also reminds of When The World Was At War for its hopeful and ultimately positive edge. It is a little slow but incredible touching, and the bridge is so kickass you can’t help but dance along.

Not All Who Wander Are Lost

This is a very sweet little song that again showcases the more positive side of Lana’s music, rather than the heartbroken and distressed women she tends to play. Though it is a filler song it’s a very pretty one and so catchy.

Wild At Heart

Wild At Heart is similar to Not All Who Wander Are Lost in that it’s a departure from a tragic femme fatale, instead a love song that also mimics Swan Song in that she considers leaving fame for her lover. What makes it even better is how Lana samples How To Disappear, a much sadder track, and twists it into something happy with this ultimately more upbeat album.

Radio

Like Diet Mountain Dew, Radio is another perky tune that is more than just a catchy filler. It’s a little bit sassy and has an edge to it (with the expletives and how her life is sweet not like sugar but cinnamon) that keeps it from being too frothy. Speaking of Lana’s newfound fame, it’s a nice break from the love ballads and tragedies peppered throughout Born To Die.

Without You

Shockingly dramatic, Without You is the ultimate symbol of Lana’s older music – a woman who could only feel happy unless her man was in her life. She has definitely moved on for the most part from wailing her demise at losing her lover but Without You is still glamorous, catchy and perfect to singalong to.

The Other Woman

This is one of Lana’s best covers – Nina Simone’s song about being the other woman and how it is in fact lonely and heart-breaking. Lana makes the song her own, her vocals stunning and lo-fi with instrumentals that are perfect for Ultraviolence.

How To Disappear

I feel that the live version of How To Disappear, where she sung it on stage before it was released with its real instrumental, is the superior version. It’s stripped back and tender enough to feel the emotion thoroughly, but the album version doesn’t disappoint. It’s one of many great tracks from (what I think is) her best album, and has a great story within it.

Fucked My Way Up To The Top

Lana’s satirical, sexy and stirring Fucked My Way Up To The Top was just tongue-in-cheek enough to keep from being too much of a cliché. Perhaps based on her real experiences but definitely a fuck-you to anyone who critiques her for owning her sexuality, it’s a little bit controversial but an incredible song.

Tomorrow Never Came

This song, which is a gorgeous duet with Sean Ono Lennon and a nice nod to 20th century music, subverts expectations that it is a sad song by in fact including a happy ending. I love how it can make you cry with both sadness and happiness, and tells a sweet story that paints pictures of parks and country houses.

Yosemite

The long-awaited Yosemite didn’t disappoint, and though it took a while to grow on me it became a classic and somehow familiar track. It’s impossible to not sing or dance to it and wouldn’t be out of place in Lust For Life.

Hope Is A Dangerous Thing

It’s quite slow – the Change/24/Old Money of Norman Fucking Rockwell – but it is clearly a personal and well-thought song that references Lana’s great inspiration Sylvia Plath. Lana’s deft at getting her thoughts out in song and I think though it’s not a song I often listen to, it is beautiful.

Honeymoon

The sweeping violins, dramatic vocals and the dangerous undercurrent makes Honeymoon crackle with electricity. It’s an amazing introduction to an album that once again has dangerous men, bad girls who get hurt but are strong again and amazing instrumentals. Though it’s not the best song from the album, it sets the tone perfectly.

Million Dollar Man

Like Without You, it’s another song of complete devastation, which Lana has grown from in her music. Million Dollar Man shows some great vocals and lyrics, and gets the emotion out perfectly whilst honouring the music that inspired her.

Old Money

The verses are pretty enough but they don’t catch my attention the way the choruses do. The slow, steady song took a long time for me to really appreciate but it’s impossible not to feel some kind of emotion when Lana lets her lover know she will be with them whenever they need her.

Sad Girl

Like The Other Woman, Sad Girl shows how being the other woman has it’s downfalls but appreciates the sexy, exciting side of it – how alluring her man is and how much of a bad bitch she may be. Once again, it’s a pure Ultraviolence song that shows Lana’s vocals and music in the best way whilst showcasing the classic caricature of the femme fatale.

Dark Paradise

Strangely upbeat for such a sad song, Dark Paradise is great to dance to but also something that makes you want to cry. Lana’s vocalisations and dramatic lyrics don’t quite compare to some of her other songs but Dark Paradise is iconic.

Summertime Sadness

The slow-burn, emotional gut punch that is Summertime Sadness is always a classic and one of Lana’s best. Though it is far from my personal favourite it is absolutely an outstanding song and the perfect example of Lana’s most well-made and well-delivered songs.

Gods and Monsters

The strained Gods and Monsters is a great tale about the evil side of fame, which Lana never quite delves too deeply into but gives a metaphorical and mildly personal nod to. Gods and Monsters is one of those songs that has you singing along and feeling strong.

Carmen

Carmen is a beautiful, sad story that feels rich and luxurious despite its harrowing lyrics of an alcoholic star. The French bridge adds to the decadence and it feels like a dirty alcohol bottle wrapped in silk, from the tentative verses to the unnerving chorus.

Born To Die

One of Lana’s original pop chart tracks, this is a song that never grows old. It’s one of the blueprints of the Lana Del Rey era and deftly shows her vocals whilst setting the tone for the pessimistic, romantic star in the early 2010s.

Salvatore

Opening with laughing – or crying – Salvatore has an eerie feel to it, though it is completely erotic in feel (enough to ignore some of the simpler lyrics). It is a song that feels dreamy, much like the rest of Honeymoon, but passionate and reminding of some of her older music (from the vocals in the bridge that have a Lolita/Fucked My Way Up To The Top feel to them to the continued trope of bad boys and glamour).

Flipside

Dirty, gritty and quite contained, Flipside is a song that I wished had more attention. It’s not her most imaginative song but there’s something about it, from the gloomy guitars to the hushed vocals, that have me wanting to sing it over and over. It also is one of her great fuck-off songs, as sympathetic as it is resilient.

Doin’ Time

Lana really turns this song into her own with the summery instrumentals and the pop edge she is so good at. It’s surprisingly one of her best covers and a fresh-feeling track that isn’t bogged down by emotion or maudlin music.

Lust For Life

Breathless and oh-so-romantic, Lust For Life is one of those songs that was perfect for the charts, and a key piece in Lana’s turn into becoming more positive. However, as fun and lovely as this song is, the demos are a whole other ball game. A little more ethereal, they fit Lana much more perfectly and it’s sad she dismissed the witchy feel for a song that is brilliant but generic.

Love

One of Lana’s warmest and most refreshing songs, she looks at love with fondness and dedicates this track to her ‘kids’. She knows her fans well and to make a song that references them (much like Happiness Is A Butterfly’s nod to her ‘babies’) makes this song all the more pleasant.

The Greatest

Lana’s vocals are put to good use in this intimately-written song. She speaks her mind in her reminiscence of the past and the worries for the future, all with a storming chorus that is certainly one of her best.

Love Song

Tender and almost tentative, Love Song is one of those tracks that is romantic through-and-through. It’s stripped back enough to feel like it really is a private song for only her lover’s ears, just as confessional as Cinnamon Girl and Bartender.

White Mustang

Short but sweet, this song has all the makings of a Lana Del Rey song, harking back to the Born To Die days with her imagery and fallen love affair, but it is spiky enough to be part of her later music where she starts giving less shits. The whistling and race cars are a nice touch, displaying her play on words snugly.

Dark But Just A Game

Sort of jazzy, Dark But Just A Game is ever-shifting and never quite settles on a particular sound. It’s cohesive, however, and clearly states what Lana is thinking in a way that works with the rest of Chemtrails. It’s pretty sexy as well, which doesn’t hurt the enjoyability factor.

High By The Beach

The wooziness, the carelessness and the growth from a woman begging to be put in a movie to a woman who is able to do as she pleases. Lana stumbles and swears through the song but knows exactly what she wants – and it isn’t disappointing men or stalking paparazzi.

Let Me Love You Like A Woman

Some may think it much slower and more boring than a lot of her tracks, but I think it’s a tidy, sweet track. Lana plainly states her love, urges her man to run away with her and lets her emotions (and voice) do the talking.

Summer Bummer

Lana is as restless as a hot summer in this song and it works. Her brisk-paced yet soft-voiced lyrics and gorgeous imagery gets my pulse racing, and ASAP Rocky’s verse works well for it. Though it would have been interesting to get a full, solo Summer Bummer, Rocky adds an edge to this song and compliments his ‘lover’ well.

Groupie Love

Much more flowery and wide-eyed, Groupie Love is like a contradiction. Lana’s passionate dalliance with Rocky’s god-like star opposes the relationship in Summer Bummer (uncertain) but both are just as secret. Groupie Love has the edge of being ultra-dreamy and demonstrating pure love – and lust – without the messiness.

American

It’s a filler track that has potential for much more. It’s an adorable song, almost cautious in its lead-up to the satisfying chorus, and is filled with Lana tropes galore. Following Lana’s stressed Ride and coming before the darkly sensual Cola, American is a breath of fresh air.

National Anthem

What an anthem it is. It’s simply provocative and one of her most classic tracks. Mixing love, money and fame together with a bit of sex thrown in, National Anthem is precisely what Lana’s America seems to be.

Is This Happiness?

It’s muted, mournful and resentful, questioning a relationship that Lana wants to keep but at the same time doesn’t. This is one of Lana’s best sad songs, tearful as it is still adoring beneath the exasperation.

Art Deco

Art Deco is purely dreamy, a song to bathe in. The lyrics are a little bit simple but Lana’s vocals and the flowing, aquatic music is the perfect hook.

Terrence Loves You

Lana’s jazzy song is delicate, letting only her voice and the saxophone dominate. With references to David Bowie, Lana pines for someone who hurt her badly, but she soothes herself with music the way plenty of her fans do when listening to her records.

White Dress

The vocals were a surprise at first – high, strained whispers – but they definitely grew on me. Painting a picture of young Lana loving life and dreaming of bigger things, it’s nostalgic in lyrics but also reminds of some of Lana’s old work – her unreleased tracks where she would serve coke and fries.

Chemtrails

It gets better as it goes on, growing and twisting from a song to sunbathe to into a restless, darkening track. It has the best vibe for an idealised world with something a bit off, and the imagery of pools, jewels and schools grounds Lana into a (very, very rich) normality rather than the glamorous star she always liked to portray.

13 Beaches

Opening with a quote from Carnival of Souls, Lana takes High By The Beach to the next level. She goes from sticking her middle finger up to the paparazzi to simply wishing she would be allowed to live her life without them hounding her. It’s a matured approach that uses sound interestingly, with beeps and whines adding a strange texture to the song.

Cola

The controversial line was intended as humour, but strangely it works. Even if Cola is satire like Fucked My Way Up To The Top, Lana owns the ‘other woman’, the patriotic singer, the sexy and unashamed woman who says what she thinks without caring of the consequences. It’s an iconic song, even if you have to turn the volume down to not offend.

Black Beauty

The unreleased version is ten times more emotive, with its stripped back and lonesome feel, but the album version is just as good. The ultimately loving but unhappy lyrics are full of stunning imagery, and this is a song that would have been perfect with a music video.

Body Electric

Blasphemous as much as it honours icons, Lana sinfully owns Body Electric. The bridge is a bit out of place but Lana’s eyebrow-raising approach to religion and sexuality is genius.

Off To The Races

The best demonstration of Lana’s vocals, Lana plays the glam girl without a care just as well as the Lolita-type, needy lover in this ode to money and her man. The soaring bridge is stunning, and the swirling violins add an air of Hollywood to it.

Bel Air

Completely overlooked (in my opinion), Bel Air is an apologetic song of redemption, a shining and honest track that is as touching as much as it is hazy and tranquil. With soft piano and the sound of children opening and closing the song respectively, it’s set apart from Paradise with a pureness that Lana pulls off well.

Ultraviolence

Controversial at the time and still controversial now, Ultraviolence is about being weak, about giving in to love no matter how toxic. I don’t entirely support the lyrics but it’s a stunning song, lo-fi enough to feel uneasy and haunting. When you shut off from the lyrics, you get a simply beautiful track.

Pretty When You Cry

Lana’s imperfect, close-to-tears vocals are wonderful in this song, and she really lets her emotion shine through. The pained guitar and Lana’s increasingly distressed singing are enough to get you feeling exactly as she does.

Florida Kilos

Fun. Fresh. Freeing. Lana’s ode to drugs is simply something to dance to and sing, and she somehow manages to get the sunny feeling across even with the Ulraviolence-esque grunginess. It’s one of my favourite songs of Lana’s because it’s just so happy, which is a nice departure from some of her heavier tracks.

Cherry

Many people’s favourite – Cherry. It was my favourite of Lana’s for a long time, dripping with sex appeal and sadness but with a cute dance to compliment it. It had all the right stuff wrapped up in a tidy, compact box and the imagery is lush. I still love this song but since then we’ve had the ‘Cherries’ of her next few albums, Cinnamon Girl and Tulsa Jesus Freak. Like these, Cherry was a song that seemed set apart from the rest of the album and was a novel take on her typical music.

California

Simply for It's meaningful, raw lyrics – promising to be there as soon as he wants her, much like in Old Money – California is a sun-soaked dream with a very honest approach. Lana isn’t completely devastated, or begging for her lover to return. She is sad but realistic, and only wants the best for him. It’s beautiful and sad with a crazily addictive chorus.

West Coast

The shift from fast-paced, grungey, whispered verses to sprawling, drawling choruses – complete with weirdly sexy beeps towards the end of the song – shook us all, and it’s one of Lana’s most interesting songs. Lana honours the West Coast but also her man, in love with the music scene as much as she is with him.

Shades of Cool

The snide verses. The gradually growing music. The guitars. The explosive chorus. The nuclear bridge. The absolutely perfect timing and pacing. Shades of Cool is flawless, another Sad Girl but with much more power, emotion and music.

The Blackest Day

The Blackest Day needs more attention. Cold in places, almost lost, but then wounded in the chorus, The Blackest Day rolls with the emotions and is the kind of song that makes you want to fall apart and sob. Which is good, in a way, as it shows how brilliantly Lana conveys emotion.

Freak

Cult-like and haunting, this is the sexy predecessor of California. Lana swoons and tempts in this track, from her harmonising to her pouting “take it to the back if you really wanna talk” - not to mention the rest of the song in its entirely, all elements married together to create the perfect seductive track.

Music To Watch Boys To

Like Art Deco, Music To Watch Boys To is fairly aquatic and dreamy. Like Freak, it has that cult vibe (the chanting of the bridge). However, this song is perfectly its own, from the mix-up of vocal styles to the shifting tone (sad to smug to obsessively in love).

Norman Fucking Rockwell

What an opener. Norman Fucking Rockwell lets the actual singing and lyrics do the talking, the instrumentals pushed back enough to let Lana’s gut-punching first line (“God damn, man child, you fucked me so good that I almost said I love you”) and her blue yet annoyed insults to her Norman Rockwell do the talking.

Mariner’s Apartment Complex

It’s a song for yourself and for the people you love. Lana is strong enough to take care of herself, to be her own guidance – and to take on her lover’s problems too. It’s an empowering song, so distant from a lot of her discography, and I adore the nautical references and the hopeful message.

Brooklyn Baby

Satire again, but it still works. Lana plays a (fairly cringey) and somewhat self-absorbed, over-confident singer who is too cool for her own boyfriend, but she does it well. From saying how she wished people didn’t judge her, to the freedom the seventies gives her, to the warm guitars and upbeat tone, to the backup vocals of Seth Kaufman, Brooklyn Baby is a song to remember for all the right reasons.

Ride

Ride is one of Lana’s best, if not the best. With her devotion to America and her open thoughts about needing other people to make her feel good and happy, Lana knocks it out of the park with the superb step up from Born To Die.

Video Games

Video Games is just beautiful, plain and simple. Lana’s low voice, telling a flowing story of the simplicities of true love, are removed from her ‘famous singer’ image she constantly tried to portray and instead open up to the heart of what she has always sung about: love and its many forms, good or bad.

Get Free

The new take on Ride was a pleasant surprise. From changing the lyrics to show she wants to move on and be happy to (silently) name-dropping her influences, Lana’s manifesto was a personal song that we could all resonate with. The outro of the beach was the perfect closer to Lust For Life, and Get Free summarised the album which took her from sad girl to someone who could let herself move on.

Heroin

Heroin is no doubt one of her best. It’s tense and dark, referencing Manson and (allegedly) a friend she lost years ago. Lana lets herself dive into her worst thoughts headfirst, not so much dreamy as it is nightmarish, but still comes out the other side dreaming of marzipan and ready to move on.

Tulsa Jesus Freak

The third of the ‘Cherries’, Tulsa Jesus Freak goes straight to a happy place. Where Cherry was angry and Cinnamon Girl was cautious, this track dives into being comfortable with her man. It was just as passionate as the other two songs but about religion, sex and self-satisfaction.

Blue Jeans

Plucking guitars, crying violins and Lana weaving a tale about a gangsta who left her, without explanation, and the hurt that follows. Similarly tied to Dark Paradise, Blue Jeans is the next level of that, her tough-girl spoken verses dismissed as the choruses open up and she pours her heart out.

Cruel World

Lana is on top-form on this song, furious, maddened, sad, taunting – she hits every emotion with style. Lana grows more and more unstable as the song goes on, invoking images of a woman scorned and no longer taking that shit, but she still has a fragility about her as she comes undone that is tied directly to her Ultraviolence era.

Happiness Is A Butterfly

This song goes through many stages. She is unsure, not knowing how her lover feels. She is optimistic, elated as she tries to capture the butterfly. She is dismissive, no longer caring if she might get hurt – she loves too much. She is pissed off, sick of being treated badly. She gives in, simply wanting to dance and just be happy. The flow of this song is constant, a little messy, but it has the beautiful message pinned to it: to keep trying to be happy and do what you love.

Fuck It I Love You

I love the music video version more than the album version, the latter being more stripped back. Fuck It I Love You just gives in to emotion, acknowledging Lana is hurt, her lover is hurt, but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t love him. She simply lets that feeling take over.

Cinnamon Girl

Cinnamon Girl touched me like no other Lana song has. Where Cherry was a mixture of emotions, good and bad, angry and loving, devastated and thrilled, Cinnamon Girl was about cautious optimism. Lana urges her lover to give in, and she knows – smiling as she sings it – she wins.

Venice Bitch

Venice Bitch just has that soothing, unhindered feel to it – and not just from the nine minutes of pure music and vibe. Lana dedicates this song to the kind of love that is just wholesome and homely, all whilst touching on her insanity, her ever-lasting love for America and the modern world (her live streams). It feels nostalgic yet contemporary, and adding the “fucks” and “bitch[es]” helps keep this song from being to sugary sweet but instead what it is – an honest love song rooted in the idealised and the realistic.

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nerianasims · 3 years

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Billboard #1s 1974

Under the cut.

Steve Miller Band – “The Joker” -- January 12, 1974

It always throws me when I remember how old this song is. Two years older than me, and yet I associate it with my own mid-20s partying. Okay, my "partying" was pretty mild. One of the things my friends and I often did was go to a dueling piano (really keyboard) bar, and they always played this song. I can taste the rum and Coke now. We had tipsy discussions about what "pompatus" meant. A guy tried to pick one of my friends up with "really love your peaches." Anyway, I love this song, but it's also so embedded into my life that I can't judge it fairly.

Al Wilson – “Show And Tell” -- January 19, 1974

1970s Philly R&B is great music. This is a pretty typical example of the genre; lots of strings, lots of horns, an adult with a voice he uses like an instrument to impart strong emotions. It's a love song, and the lyrics aren't anything spectacular, but they do the job. Very good.

Ringo Starr – “You’re Sixteen” -- January 26, 1974

GAH. Next!

Barbra Streisand – “The Way We Were” -- February 2, 1974

I was tempted to write, "GAH. Next!" here too, but I'm determined to save that kind of thing for songs that have elements to them that I don't want to discuss because of moral issues. That's not this. The problem is: I hate Barbra Streisand. Or I should say I hate her singing; though from what I've seen of her personality, I don't like that either. Every song she sings, she sounds like she's singing to the glory of the greatness of the only person who matters to her in the world: Barbra Streisand. I once read an article that called her singing "masturbatory," but that's not strong enough. It's full-on self-worship. I hate it.

The Love Unlimited Orchestra – “Love’s Theme” -- February 9, 1974

This is Barry White's orchestra, but sadly it's an instrumental, without his glorious voice. It reminds me so much of the Love Boat theme that now I'm wanting to watch it. Absolute kitsch, but as kitsch goes, there's worse.

Terry Jacks – “Seasons In The Sun” -- March 2, 1974

The singer is dying and saying goodbye to everyone. That kind of sentiment may be made to work in pop, I suppose, but I've never heard it done. It belongs in opera. This is schmaltz.

Cher – “Dark Lady” -- March 23, 1974

As one of only a couple dark-haired dark-eyed girls in my quite blonde high school graduating class, people used to call me "exotic." Apparently my high cheekbones had something to do with it too. I was asked where my family was from pretty regularly. I wasn't offended -- more bemused. The answer is "Europe," though I guess the dark hair and eyes are probably by way of France. It's rather tough to say, considering my mother's side of the family has been here since the 16th century (indentured servants), and were not the rich types who stuck to their own ethnicity. Anyway, this is to say that I feel some kinship with Cher, and how drawn she was to songs like "Dark Lady." Though in this case, the "dark lady" is someone Cher's character murders for cheating with her boyfriend. She kills the boyfriend too.

This song is dated ("gypsy music") Las Vegas cheese, and yet I like it. It's wildly melodramatic and fun.

John Denver – “Sunshine On My Shoulders” -- March 30, 1974

Bleeeeeh. I like big melodramatic songs. This is the opposite. Now, I do like small, sweet songs often too. But I just can't with this one. It's too slow, too simple, and feels aggressively, shallowly cheery.

Blue Swede – “Hooked On A Feeling” -- April 6, 1974

I learned from the Todd in the Shadows video about this song that its stupid "ooga chaka" thing was inspired by 1960's "Running Bear." Now I hate it even more! The original of this song is a nice, simple love song. Blue Swede made it shouty and dumb.

Elton John – “Bennie And The Jets” -- April 13, 1974

It's Elton John. Therefore I don't like it. I feel like it's too slow maybe? I feel like most of Elton John's songs are too slow maybe. I don't know. I'm bored.

MFSB & The Three Degrees’ “TSOP (The Sound Of Philadelphia)” -- April 20, 1974

An instrumental disco track. It is one I find danceable, so there's that. Not bad.

Grand Funk – “The Loco-Motion” -- May 4, 1974

A rock cover of The Loco-Motion. Sure, why not. Though this version is not very good. It feels like they slowed it down, and they definitely made it extremely loud. I don't really see a reason for this song to exist.

Ray Stevens – “The Streak” -- May 18, 1974

Streaking was a fad in 1974. This is a comedy song about it. I had never heard it before this, and I hope never to again. It's deeply dumb.

Paul McCartney & Wings – “Band On The Run” -- June 8, 1974

The wee-oo-wee-oo-wee-oo thing at the beginning of the song sounds neat, but then it goes on too long. That's my feeling about this entire song: It goes on too long. It does change up substantially multiple times throughout, but it's no Bohemian Rhapsody. Bohemian Rhapsody is, imo, perfect. The pacing of "Band on the Run," otoh, is a mess. The second section needs to be a lot longer and the final section needs to be a lot shorter. Paul McCartney needed an editor for this.

Bo Donaldson And The Heywoods – “Billy, Don’t Be A Hero” -- June 15, 1974

A young woman tells her boyfriend to not "be a hero" when he goes off to war (probably the Civil War.) Because she wants him to come home alive. As anyone who knows this kind of song can predict, he decides to be a hero and dies. Cliche and weirdly bouncy for the subject matter. Still, at least songs were acknowledging that dying in war was not a great thing. Unlike the putrescent "Ballad of the Green Berets."

Gordon Lightfoot – “Sundown” -- June 29, 1974

The singer is jealously obsessed with a woman. He knows this isn't a good thing, but he doesn't seem able to -- or be trying to -- move past it. This is about something real; Gordon Lightfoot was obsessively, violently jealous over Cathy Smith, the woman who was later convicted for injecting John Belushi with the heroin that killed him. The lyrics are mean, but the music doesn't go hard at all. Except, compared to the rest of the stuff I've looked at for 1974 so far, the music does sound a lot harder -- it's minor key and there's a distinct bassline. It still feels like a mismatch.

The Hues Corporation – “Rock The Boat” -- July 6, 1974

A disco song I can dance to some. Not entirely. It's a song asking you not to "rock the boat" of your perfect love with the singer. It's incredibly schmaltzy -- schmaltzy disco. Ugh.

George McCrae – “Rock Your Baby” -- July 13, 1974

The singer is telling you, "woman," to take him in your arms and rock him. I.e. fuck him. I have perfect pitch. George McCrae is no Ella Fitzgerald. When he goes to the high note, he does not hit it right, and it's like nails on a chalkboard. I can't listen to this song all the way through.

John Denver – “Annie’s Song” -- July 27, 1974

Ugh, 1974. This is a simplistic love song to John Denver's wife. Not just simple, which is fine, but simplistic, which is not. They divorced years later, and Denver became violent during it. (Denver's the one who brought that to light and he obviously felt terrible about it.) The Stereogum guy was shocked by this. I'm not. For one, celebrity is horrible for people. For another, I can't think of any of Denver's songs that have depth or complexity. Trying to live at the surface is also horrible for people. I do like a lot of simple love songs, but John Denver's songs have always made me go "ick," even when I was a child. I feel like there's nothing in them.

Roberta Flack – “Feel Like Makin’ Love” -- August 10, 1974

The music to this song, with the calm but interesting percussion and romantic guitar, combined with Roberta Flack's whispery vocals, is lovely. It gives me asmr feels and makes me want to lie down and drift off to sleep. So, uh. Not exactly what I consider a sexy song. I do like listening to it, as it's nice and calming, but I don't think that was the intent.

Paper Lace – “The Night Chicago Died” -- August 17, 1974

And I will definitely need some relaxation after this garbage. Okay so, this travesty was by Brits who: 1) Thought there was an East Side of Chicago. That's Lake Michigan. 2) Thought it would be cute to write a song in which Al Capone tried to literally take over Chicago by killing all the cops (he bribed cops, he didn't kill them, and he was a criminal, not an insurrectionary.) 3) Sing "glory be" because they obviously think that's a super American thing to do. "In the land of the dollar bill." WHAT? This song makes me want to punt Paper Lace into the East Side of Chicago.

Paul Anka – “(You’re) Having My Baby” -- August 24, 1974

Notoriously one of the worst pop songs ever. The singer thinks "you" (that makes it worse) are having his baby solely and only because you love him. Monumental narcissism, just completely heinous, plus it's musical glop.

Eric Clapton – “I Shot The Sheriff” -- September 14, 1974

This is not Bob Marley's version. Bob Marley's version is so much better, and it's the one I've heard a lot, so when I turned this one on I was confused for a second.

Barry White – “Can’t Get Enough Of Your Love, Babe” -- September 21, 1974

Oh thank god. Barry White is one of my favorite singers, and this is one of my favorite songs. This is a sexy love song by a great artist.

Andy Kim – “Rock Me Gently” -- September 28, 1974

Andy Kim's voice sounds incredibly mid-70s. What's with men asking their lovers to rock them this year? The chorus is pretty good, and has a real beat. He's asking his lover to be gentle, and "I have never been loved like this before." That's nice. It's cheese, but it's fine.

Olivia Newton-John – “I Honestly Love You” -- October 5, 1974

A lot of the time when someone says they "honestly" something without prompting, they're lying. So this song sounds weird to me. "I love you/ I honestly love you" -- um, you sure about that? Though the singer has no reason to pretend she loves the person she's singing to, and every reason not to, since they're both with someone else. She just wants to tell you she loves you and leave it at that. Yeah, that's likely. Olivia Newton-John is a good singer, and she's especially good at acting a song. I feel she should have been on Broadway. In any case, while this is a slow soft song in an era with way too many of those, it's one of the better ones. It's not overly slow or particularly goopy.

Billy Preston – “Nothing From Nothing” -- October 19, 1974

If there's such a thing as vaudeville rock, this is it. He doesn't want to be your hero or your highness, so it sounds like he wants an equal relationship. He also says "I'm a soldier in the war on poverty," which makes it sounds like he's saying you have to have money if you want to get with him, but maybe not. He sings "you gotta bring a little something, girl, if you want to be with me," which may or may not be monetary. It's bouncy and all, but Billy Preston's done better.

Dionne Warwick & The Spinners – “Then Came You” -- October 26, 1974

A song about finally finding love. Plenty of good orchestration, a good beat, and of course Dionne Warwick's voice. I like it.

Stevie Wonder – “You Haven’t Done Nothin'” -- November 2, 1974

The "you" in this song is Richard Nixon. Stevie Wonder is one of the most love everyone, let's all come together artists in existence. But here, he was angry. "We would not care to wake up to the nightmare/ That's becoming real life/ But when misled who knows a person's mind/ Can turn as cold as ice." The Republican Party is still Nixon's party -- they love him almost as much as they do Reagan. This song is funky and good and the only reason I don't feel it more is that it's not angry enough.

Bachman-Turner Overdrive – “You Ain’t Seen Nothing Yet” -- November 9, 1974

They were goofing around in the studio, and lead singer Randy Bachman wanted to make fun of his brother's stutter. When this song became a hit, Randy was mortified. But even with nasty, juvenile intentions behind it, this song is good. It also sounds happy and not mean at all. It's a rather silly song about first experiencing sex, and it's fun.

John Lennon – “Whatever Gets You Thru The Night” -- November 16, 1974

John Lennon's voice was always kinda nasal, but it's really nasal on this song. Anyway, this song may as well be called "you do you." It's a song that in theory I should not find boring, but in practice I do. I have finally found out why: Elton John helped him with it. It sounds very Elton John-ish. Which means I don't really have anything else to say.

Billy Swan – “I Can Help” -- November 23, 1974

Some old-fashioned rockability is a nice change. The singer sees that the woman needs some help, so "let me help." "I got two strong arms/ Let me help." I immediately think of a romance between a farmhand and a widow woman. "It would sure do me good to do you good." That's a pretty concise description of love. Billy Swain's voice is kinda thin; Elvis did a cover of this, and it's a lot better. Billy Swain's version is sweet and all, but Elvis' is irresistible.

Carl Douglas – “Kung Fu Fighting” -- December 7, 1974

This isn't a song about actual kung fu; it's about kung fu movies. It's a fanboy telling you all about the cool movie he just saw, though not telling you a thing about the plot. Just the "expert timing" and stuff. Trying to analyze "Kung Fu Fighting" feels really silly. It's a rare enjoyable novelty song by an actual musician.

Harry Chapin – “Cat’s In The Cradle” -- December 21, 1974

A cover of this song by Ugly Kid Joe became a hit in 1992. And it was massively overplayed, so I hate this song. This father/son stuff bores me anyway, speaking of overplayed.

Helen Reddy – “Angie Baby” -- December 28, 1974

This song is deeply strange, which is a mark in its favor. It's a story song about a girl who has no friends and had to be taken out of school because she's "a little touched." She lives in a world of make-believe, listening to the radio all the time. A neighbor boy comes along to rape her. But as soon as he walks into her room... "Toward the radio he's bound/ Never to be found." He becomes her "secret lover," trapped in the radio. "It's so nice to be insane/ No one asks you to explain." Is Angie really "insane," or is she a sorceress whose rock n' roll powers everyone looks away from? Both? I'm not sure what I think of this song, but it is interesting, and that's always good.

BEST OF 1974 -- "Can't Get Enough of Your Love, Babe" by Barry White WORST OF 1974 -- "(You're) Having My Baby" by Paul Anka

#billboard number ones

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taste-in-music · 4 years

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My Other Favorite Songs of 2019

This is a list for all of my favorite songs of the year that aren’t on my album of EP of the year list. (Read my top albums and EPs of the year lists if you want some context.) However, songs from albums that were on my rapid-fire review list are fare game. That’s enough preamble, this list is in no particular order (except, of course, for the final song.)

Listen along to the complete mix of all these songs HERE. Let’s talk about some great music!

affection by BETWEEN FRIENDS: This was my favorite song off of BETWEEN FRIENDS’s debut EP from this year, we just need some time together. This is the perfect swoony, dreamy pop song that was my relaxing Summer jam. I love the way the melody on the hook is ushered in with a churning bass in the pre-chorus and washes over me with each listen.

trevi fountain by Leo Kalyan: Leo Kalyan is one of my favorite, (and most underrated) dream pop artists, always able to capture a sense of otherwordly bliss in his music. If there was one word I had to use to describe this song, it would be romantic. This song feels purely, dizzyingly, head-over-heels in love, and it was on repeat for me all throughout Valentine’s Day.

Numb by Baker Grace: One of the most instantly catchy songs of the year. Chopped-up vocals don’t always work for me, but here they combine with the punchy production in such a way that they contribute to the “over-it” attitude of the song. God, what a bop.

Clumsy Love by Thelma Plum: This melancholy love song traipsed its way right into my heart as soon as I heard it. The light tambourines, bubbly guitar, and upbeat melody give this song a sunny feel that contrasts nicely with Thelma Plum’s heartbroken lyrics and delivery.

Love You For A Long Time by Maggie Rogers: If more people used that reverb-layered-vocal-chorus-of-angels effect in their music, then I would like that very much, because so far Miss Maggie Rogers has used it twice, (on this and “Retrograde”) and it has made those songs some of my favorites from her. This sweet, upbeat track was a surprising single after the album, and I swear I listened to it on a loop for a week straight. I’m going to love this song for a long time.

Karma by MARINA: This is probably my favorite song off of Love + Fear, or at least it was the song that I returned to the most as the year went on. The icy backing vocals and Spanish guitars give the track a cool and refreshing feel. MARINA’s performance is, as always, gorgeous, her rich vocals skating over the frosty soundscape with grace and a hint of sarcasm.

Gone by Charli XCX ft. Christine and the Queens: One word: BOP. I seriously considered ending the write-up there, but I’ll also mention that Charli and Chris have amazing vocal chemistry, the lyrics about being socially awkward are seriously relatable, and the bass is sick. Also, Chris’s lines in French? Iconic. Even the instrumental breakdown at the end has grown on me.

Death By A Thousand Cuts by Taylor Swift: This ended up being my favorite song off Lover, (with “Cruel Summer” taking a close second.) I am obsessed with the sparkly production, (my boy Jack Antanoff, once again, went antanOFF,) especially those flitting, echo-y vocal samples that start the track out and the glittering keys that dance under the verses. Along with that, Swift’s writing is sharp, recounting a breakup in a specific yet relatable way.

make up by Ariana Grande: This was the first non-single off of thank u, next that I really loved. I think it’s due to the fun, cheeky energy. The beat perfectly balances tense plucked bass, chimes, and vintage-leaning, pitch-shifted backing vocals, I especially love those “hey-hey-hey”s that pepper the chorus. This is a great song to get ready for a party to.

Don’t Say by Robinson: I didn’t realize how much I missed Robinson until she came back with this immaculate synthpop banger of a breakup song. The upbeat production on this make it fun and danceable, but Robinson’s delivery makes it a fireball of emotion as well. She’s supposedly dropping a new EP soon, and I can’t wait.

Live Forever by Nasty Cherry: Nasty Cherry were one of the most fascinating bands to emerge this year, backed by Charli XCX and a Netflix docuseries. Now I don’t care about all that so long as the music was good, and you know what? They’ve got some damn good songs, and I’m a sucker for all-women bands. This song edged out the band’s debut single “Win” for the list. The harmonies on the chorus, bright guitars, and all-around nostalgic feel of this song made this an instant pop-rock jam in my book.

Blinding Lights by The Weeknd: I’ve always found The Weeknd’s music to be most engaging when it sounds like he’s having fun, like in “Can’t Feel My Face.” This song is an absolute jam, with an instrumental that sounds like it was ripped right from the 80′s, (but it literally was though, it samples “Take on Me” by a-ha,”) and one of the most instantly likable choruses I’ve heard in a while.

Playing Games by Anna Of The North: This is just a total jam that I couldn’t stop playing at the end of the Summer. I love the light guitars on the verses and the smooth, relaxed-yet-upbeat feel. It’s probably my favorite song off of Dream Girl.

Sanctuary by Joji: Joji’s music has always been hit or miss for me, but this song is definitely a hit. The dreamy, spacey atmosphere built up by the spacious synths and Joji’s laid-back delivery instantly puts me at ease.

Soaked by BENEE: The song that introduced me to BENEE also ended up being my favorite from her. The jaunty, casual feel of this song make it the ultimate laid-back indie pop tune. Both of BENEE’s EPs from this year, FIRE ON MARZZ and STELLA & STEVE are quirky listens that are worth your time.

The King by Conan Gray: 2019 saw Conan Gray taking his lyricism into a more heartbroken and sarcastic direction, which was an interested evolution to witness. Out of all the singles that Conan Gray dropped throughout the course of the year, this one is my favorite. I love the way the chorus rushes through me with every new listen, Conan’s delivery is so dang breezy.

Twist by Dizzy: I swear Dizzy have nostalgic melancholy perfected into a science. This song has one of my favorite choruses of the year, featuring lyrics that are heart-twisting (ha, but no really,) and a gentle yet earnest delivery from frontwoman Katie Munshaw. Whenever I hear this I feel sad in a reflective, smiling-with-a-single-tear-rolling-down-my-cheek kind of way.

Joyride by SONIA: I came across this on a Spotify New Music Friday one week and clicked on it just for kicks and it has been one of my favorite finds of the year. SONIA has one of those smoky, sensual voices that I can’t help but love, and her performance paired with the yearning lyrics make for a song that is sorrowful yet romantic at the same time.

You Sexy Thing by Zella Day: And the award for comeback of the year goes to Zella Day, whose music I fell in love with back in 2016 and have been patiently awaiting for new content from since. She hinted at dropping new music last December, and boy was this worth the wait. This cover of the 1975 release by Hot Chocolate is retro, playful, and, what else? Sexy. I hope to hear more from Ms. Day in the near future, but until then, I will have this, Kicker, and the Man On The Moon/Hunnie Pie single on a continuous loop.

Red by Lucy Daydream: I found this song in my Spotify Discovery Weekly back in April, and what a fun find it was. This song is a relaxing indie pop bop with inexplicable replay value. I loved this so much that I even checked out Lucy Daydream’s album from this year, Awake & Dreaming, and while the rest of the album didn’t quite match this song in my opinion, I still thought it was a nice listen. I’m definitely keeping Lucy Daydream on my radar going into the future.

What About Love by BANKS: As I mentioned on my Rapid-Fire Reviews list, I wasn’t all that into III. However, there were some songs on it that I really latched onto, and this was one of them. This song conveys so much raw emotion, with one of BANKS’s most impassioned performances on the whole album. I love the use of autotune, quivering strings, sparse keys, and fluttering vocal samples to create an isolated yet overwhelming soundscape, (it’s amazing with headphones on.) Also, every lyric in this hits like a gut punch.

Harmony Hall by Vampire Weekend: I thought that I liked this song, but I guess I love this song, because it ended up being my fifth most listened to song of 2019? There’s definitely a reason for that, this song is so instantly likable, with a memorable guitar line, bright pianos, and one of the most anthemic choruses of the year.

Alligator by Of Monsters and Men: What a smash debut single this was, I was hooked from the very first chord. The energy in this song is unmatched, it has a sense of propulsive power that always hypes me up. The thin layers of distortion and reverb over the guitars and Nanna Bryndís Hilmarsdóttir’s voice give this song a sense of otherworldly eeriness that I really enjoy.

Blown to Bits by Charly Bliss: This song sounds like the jittery feeling I get after drinking caffeine in the best kind of way, if that makes any kind of sense. The buzzy guitars, vocal layering, and overall electric energy present on this track made it an instant favorite off of Charly Bliss’s album from this year Young Enough. Also the lyrics are weirdly relatable as they recount feelings of uncertainty and nostalgia, and Eva Hendricks delivers them with firepower.

House Of Glass by Cage The Elephant: This is just a banger through and through, and the fact that the opening riff is reminiscent of “Come A Little Closer” doesn’t hurt either. The verses maintain a nice sense of tension, with Matt Schultz delivering the lyrics in a near whisper. But once that chorus kicks in, it’s official, I have no choice but to become a swaggering badass.

still feel by half•alive: This was my first favorite song of the year, (and I know it was technically a single from last year, but the album dropped this year, so I’m counting it,) I remember playing this on a loop all throughout January. And you know what? It hasn’t faded on me in the slightest, this is still a banger through and through. The bass groove, the snaps, that little chime that comes at the end of the prechorus, it makes for one hell of a buildup. And once that chorus hits I have no choice but to groove off into the galaxy.

In the Afternoon by MGMT: Another comeback that made this year amazing! Not only are MGMT back with a new single, but they’re also independent now, which inspired my best pun of the year. This song slams, it’s filled with creepy atmosphere but by the end you’ll be dancing and singing along. Needless to say, I’m hyped to see what they bring into the new year.

My Favorite Fish by Gus Dapperton: The melody on this chorus is so catchy, once you hear it it will not leave your head. I also love the vibe of this song, it’s very relaxed and nonchalant in its delivery. I reckon it’d be a nice song to take a long, sunset walk on the beach to.

Little Trouble by Better Oblivion Community Center: Better Oblivion Community Center, the collaboration project of Phoebe Bridgers and Conor Oberst, put out a lot of great music this year. I was torn between this and “Dylan Thomas” to make the list, but ultimately picked this one because its energy, built up by squealing electric guitars and shuffling drums, is so upbeat, and over the course of the year it never failed to put a smile on my face.

Can’t Buy Happiness by Tash Sultana: Tash Sultana has always been a musician I’ve tended to admire for their talent from afar, never returning to their music all that often. This song, however, broke that pattern with its hypnotically beautiful simplicity. The gentle guitars that open this track blossom into a lush soundscape during each chorus, studded with grandiose synths, light cymbals, and Tash Sultana’s larger-than-life performance.

Fucking Money Man by ROSALÍA: I’m including both songs on this single release because they’re equally brilliant. “Milionària” is a lively, upbeat track that relishes in opulence, peppered with the playful refrain of “fucking money man” and snappy drums. The tone switches right after with the haunting ballad “Dio$ No$ Libre Del Dinero,” which warns of the dangers of greed.

Everybody Loves You by SOAK: The way the narrative on this song unfold as the track progresses is just beautiful. I don’t want to go too in depth, because I feel like it’s someone a person should experience without knowing anything prior. Let’s just say that this was a song I came back to whenever I was feeling emo, and the way it blossoms into brightness always has a way of making me feel better whenever I’m down.

Rylan by The National: So The National have been around for literal decades but I just discovered them this year, loving the song “I’ll Still Destroy You” off of Sleep Well Beast especially. However, I also really enjoyed this song, with its breezy rock sound and melancholy lyrical narrative. The ghostly backing vocals that inhabit the mix send shivers down my spine. Also, the bridge. Just, everything about the bridge.

Summer Girl by HAIM: This breezy, chill tune was perfect for those long, relaxed days in August where the afternoons drag on until 9:00pm. It reminds me of “Walk on the Wild Side” by Lou Reed, but a bit jazzier, with the saxophone and the playful “doo doo doo” refrain. I aspire to the levels of cool that HAIM have achieved. I know I’ll never reach it, but I still aspire to it.

cellophane by FKA Twigs: If there was any one quality that I would point to in order to describe why this song is so good, it would be its build in dynamics. This song starts out as sounding so fragile it could shatter at any second, which Twigs’s vocals barely rising above a whisper and backed in gentle murmurs and light pianos. However, as the sharper synths slither in and her voice gets more powerful, the sound builds to a gorgeous and jaw-dropping finale that never loses any of its emotion for a second.

Barefoot In The Park by James Blake ft. ROSALÍA: This song sounds like running through a forest while alien lights flash overhead. The ambiance is romantic and slightly chilling, made up of light marimbas, siren-like vocal samples, and whispering synths. I initially listened to this song because of ROSALÍA, but I ended up loving it so much that I checked out James Blake’s album from this year, Assume Form, too.

Bags by Clairo: Clairo’s debut album Immunity was a beautiful display of emotion and subtlety, and this was my favorite song off of that project. The production here is sweet and sorrowful, with flitting guitars and light drums, and Clairo’s lyrics and performance match perfectly. Everything about this communicates reserved, tender pining, (are y’all sensing a theme on this list?) It makes me go absolutely bananas every time I hear it.

Get Well by Donna Missal: Y’all know I’ll take any chance to talk about my queen Donna Missal. She released two singles this year, this and the excellent R&B slow-burner “You Burned Me,” but I had to pick this one for the list. Not only did this drop on Valentine’s Day, but I love how restrained and delicate this song is, both in its simple production and in Donna’s bordering-on-fragile delivery.

Falling by Harry Styles: This turned out to be my favorite song off of Fine Line. (My rapid-fire review for that album: pretty good, but a bit bland, and I missed the rock edge of Harry’s debut.) Still, this is a stunner if there ever was one. I’m just a sucker for a regretful love song with a bare yet effective instrumental and emotive vocals.

I Lost a Friend by FINNEAS: I’ve spoken multiple times about how I love the way this song builds throughout its runtime. This song starts out with a simple guitar line and slowly adds elements like distortion, flutes, and bass to communicate the emotional intensity in the lyrics. FINNEAS is a fascinating performer and producer, both in his work and with others, and I can’t wait to see what he does in the future.

Seventeen by Sharon Van Etten: This year I’ve been thinking a lot about the future, and one of the ways I would sate my anxieties about uncertainties to come would be through music, (I don’t know if that was apparent from many of my picks on this list.) No song better described the whirlwind of emotions ripping through me than this one. Sharon Van Etten’s take on giving advice to her younger self served as a comforting voice of reason to me throughout the year. Her performance here is assuring yet slightly concerned, nostalgic and yet tinged with regret. This almost sounds like a lost Stevie Nicks song, with a propulsive build of guitars, unrestrained synths dancing throughout the mix, and a chorus that I want to scream out the window of a car speeding down a highway. I absolutely adore it.

I Dare You by The Regrettes: If you aren’t surprised, then I’m not surprised. I’m pretty sure I’ve mentioned before that this is my song of the year, hands down. If “Seventeen” was the song that articulated all of my anxieties throughout the year, then “I Dare You” was the song that provided a reprieve from them. This song feels timeless, like it could’ve come out during a slew of decades, and yet it sounds modern as well. Every detail of the instrumental seems perfectly designed to form the most catchy and likable song ever created, from the light snares, to the “oohs” in the prechorus, to the colorful guitars. Also, can we talk about how adorable the lyrics are? They perfectly describe the flurry of feeling that come with a crush, from “you’re the one that brings the sun” to “there's a look that you give me, a switch / and my filter melts, and the words just slip.” Not only was this my most-listened to song this year, but I can’t think of a piece of music this year that made me happier every time I returned to it. Also, the music video was just as cute as the song was.

And that’s the list! What were your favorite songs of 2019? Any artists, albums, singles, etc. I should know about? Leave your thoughts and recommendations down below.

#favorites #songs #music #song of the year #song recommendation #not tagging every artist good lorde #taste in music #taste in music 2019 faves

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hanramm156 · 4 years

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Rammstein Family Game: Get to know me! (Warning: a long ramble)

I’m honored to be tagged by @cherrisplace and @momoredcrow. ^^ It’s been a pleasure to read other people’s Rammstein memories and opinions, so here comes mine as well. Writing is one of those rare things that keep me sane during this crazy season, so I apologize this being super long. More rambling is probably coming when everything’s cancelled and I have nothing else to do.

Rules: There are no rules. Tag whoever you want. Don’t tag yourself. Tag yourself. You don’t have to answer all the questions. Do what you please. Have fun.

Created by: @vapor-stein

1. I’m curious: when did you discover Rammstein?

2004 properly, but I might have heard Du hast or other popular songs even earlier.

2. Tell me your story. How did you discover them?

As said, it was 2004 and I was watching some random Finnish music show. Back in the days, I watched a lot of music videos from the tv and recorded my favorite ones to VHS. One evening Rammstein’s Amerika came from the show and I was like “??? What on earth is this??? Sounds interesting…”. I wasn’t into metal music back then (I mostly listened to indiepop and alternative rock), but for whatever reason, I got hooked instantly to this German band’s dark, eerie sound. It was refreshing to hear something else than English and the video was also thrilling.

Rammstein had intruded my mind already, but the final straw was when I saw the Mein Teil video. I liked both the song and the video A LOT - so much that I even felt kinda “dirty” for liking something this dark. A 14-year-old me was constantly asking from myself that: “am I even allowed to like this kind of stuff this much?”. The backstory for the song was creepy, but so mesmerizing – like I had been introduced to the darkest corners of human mind: yes, this kind of stuff happens, and we shouldn’t close our eyes from it. So next, the only thing I could do was to buy Reise, reise album, listen to it on loop and sketch my German notebook full of Rammstein lyrics. Here’s a proof:

I have so many stories about my relationship to Rammstein that I might have to write them all down now when there’s a lot of time.

3. Favourite song?

This topic would be worth a novel itself, but here are some of my favorites:

Asche zu Asche – So badass, gives me such an energy every time – plus, not to forget the burning microphones and SILVER REESH!

Bück dich – Yes, it’s a horrible story once again in this song, but I can’t help but to admit that the song is freaking catchy and in a weird way, hot. Also, there’s a funny backstory when I was in 9th grade and we almost performed this song in our official graduation party with my boyfriend and a bunch of our friends (maybe good that the idea was abandoned in the end…). We had a vague clue what the song was about, but we just thought it was funny – also, our German teacher dressed always in leather and loved Rammstein (she played us Bestrafe mich during one class and I’ll always remember the awkward atmosphere) so we were thinking to dedicate the song to her for as our goodbye. XDD Seriously, why I have been so weird for all my life…

Sehnsucht – In most of the pop songs, longing is described by tender words and soft lyrics, but not in Rammstein’s case. I’ve had this weird feeling of “longing” all my life that I can’t describe properly. It’s kind of an inner emptiness, only arts and music can help to deal with it when it hits. I think Sehnsucht describes so realistically what is longing about in reality: it’s this angry pressure in your heart which you want to get out of your chest but can’t. In the end, you just want to scream your lungs out.

Mein Herz brennt – Powerful song that always gives me goosebumps. I can’t even explain why. Maybe the fact that “tough” men being emotional is my soft spot and Rammstein hits that spot hard.

Links 2-3-4 – I have always been kind of a rebel and I feel like when everyone else is going to the “right” I have to go to the left, to the unknown. My heart is longing for adventure, for the paths the others are not going. I dunno, but this is such a powerful song for me. When I hear it, I always just want to jump around. In Tampere concert I went totally nuts when Links started as the second song, lol. From that moment I felt like I was back home with my boys.

Mein Teil – No need for further explanations anymore.

Los – The harmonica solo!!! The dropped c tuning and the acoustic sounds!! I love it.

Amour – My favorite R+ ballad. I confess that I listen to this and think about the lyrics when I’m in the mood for writing something painfully romantic.

Weit weg – There’s this painful longing once again that always resonates to me. I listened this to a lot after the “after blues” of Ratina concert.

Tattoo – A song that I didn’t care about so much at first, but for whatever reason, it’s almost my favorite from the new album nowadays. It’s catchy as hell and I like the “rattling” guitar riffs.

4. Least favourite song? Come on. I know you have one.

Feuer frei – Too much Vin Diesel vibes. I also get a picture of drunken, middle-aged Finnish guys on a R+ gig who don’t care about to band, but just want to have a party of their life and get drunk, far away from their wives. (No offense to anyone, but as music is almost like a religion to me, I can’t help but to have a bit of disrespect for kind of people who just “consume” music.)

Pussy – Both musically and lyrically, so bad, but I get the point the guys tried to give with this nonsense.

5. Favourite album? & 6. Least favourite album? aka. I ramble about all the albums.

Tough one… as the rules were vague, I decided to have a short opinion about each of the albums.

Herzeleid – Summary: a bunch of guys, born and raised in DDR, are tired of everything so they get together and play aggressive songs - you can almost smell the testosterone miles away while you are listening to this album. I have to admit that I love this album even though it’s not musically super creative. It’s just raw men with raw feelings – and I have to say, it works for me.

Sehnsucht – I was creeped out of the album art as a teenager, lol. But yeah, musically improved from the former one and there are some classic songs that make Rammstein as they are nowadays. I listen to this often when I’m driving.

Mutter – The album that they had the most struggles with if I have understood correctly. The pain can be heard through the songs and it’s so honest and raw. I lost my friend in 2004 tragically and this album was one of the things that kept me sane back then. Especially the beginning of the album (MHB, Links, Sonne) hits me hard in the guts.

Reise, reise – The album that started all this hype in me, so it has a special place in my heart. I also liked how they tried something different to their usual sounds in this one, like orchestral and acoustic songs.

Rosenrot – To be honest, this album has always left me a bit “cold”, so I cannot even make a real opinion of it. There are some good moments though, like Mann gegen Mann that really speaks to me.

Untitled: This has been on the loop since last August and I was honestly surprised how good the album was. I hadn’t listened to Rammstein for a while, but when I got this album to my hands after the concert, holy shit it hit me. I like hearing the path the guys have gone: their new music is much more mature than the first angry albums. Also, I love Till’s poetry in this one, like Was ich liebe and Weit weg.

I think I answered the question #7 already, so I’ll skip to #8.

8. Unpopular opinion about a member? A scandal? Anything?

Even though I appreciate Till as an artist and a poet, I don’t find his appearance attractive. You can throw rotten tomatoes at me now, but this is just my opinion, no means to offend anyone. Maybe the reason is that my taste for men tends to go for androgynous side, so I am not drawn towards very masculine men.

I’m not interested in Lindemann project and I don’t like their music so much, but the tour looked entertaining though. I bet all the people who attended had a lot of fun.

How Richard pronounces English is extremely sexy to my ear, even though it clearly sounds like a German guy trying to sound American - still, it’s like honey to my ears. Stupid man who makes my knees weak with everything he does.

I hate to admit that I don’t like Ohne dich so much. I don’t know why. :(

9. Have you ever seen them live? Tell me what you felt.

Three times this far! Oh man, I could talk about for hours how the concerts have made me feel, but I try to be reasonable now.

Ruisrock, Turku, 2005 – My first time seeing them live – and going to a festival without any adult supervision, so it was a special experience overall – and they blew my mind. It was raining and thundering and we were completely soaked with my friends, but it was worth it!

Bonus for everyone who managed to read this far: teenage me waiting for Rammstein to start playing, looking so badass with my denim jacket and R+ logo drawn with eyeliner. :D

Hartwall Arena, Helsinki, 2012: We went to the show together with my boyfriend to celebrate Valentine’s day and holy shiiiiit it was awesome. Hands down one of the best evenings of my life. I was so hooked to Rammstein afterward that when we were at my bf’s family’s cottage, his brother had to tell me to stop blasting Herzeleid all the time in the kitchen. :’D

Ratina Stadium, Tampere, 2019: Aka. byebye my life, say hello to fics, listening to the band all over again, stupid memes and all the content this fandom creates. I fell in love again with Rammstein during this concert.

I have tickets for Düsseldorf and Tallinn, but now I can only wait and stress that will Corona ruin everything. In that case, I’ll weep alone and write fics about the tour 2020 that ended up never happening.

10. Do you play any instruments? If you do can you play any song by them?

Yeah, I play guitar and piano but nowadays I mostly sing. Rammstein songs are super easy to play with guitar and I recently learnt to play Tattoo and Sex. Have been practicing Engle on piano as well. Some songs I like to sing are Deutschland, Tattoo and Engel. The “speaking” parts are difficult though. ^^;

I’m not sure who I could tag to this who hasn’t done it already, but I’ll try my luck: @ah-its-too-much @soronya @einemelodie @xiaolianhuax @so-darya-darya @maximaembra @kvidasjuklingur

#rammstein #tag game #get to know me #hanhan's rambles #I spent ridiculous amount of time doing this #whatever

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rexcaliburechoes · 4 years

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You know that game idea I was kicking around for a bit? And I ended up writing like. A bunch of paragraphs for it? Yeah, that one.

Well, I made some mock designs for it.

As it goes, I know 0 about character design and I am not very good at posing and proportions, as well as the fact that this is all a WIP and will probably never go anywhere. Good? Good.

Warning, this is pretty damn long because I discuss some potential character interactions and the designs because I need to talk about it lmao (obligatory readmore because I talk too much lmao)

Viola

Viola’s the odd one out of the three because I he just kind of popped into my brain one day and I went “sure let’s roll with that” simply because I was throwing around ideas for the rest of the String Quartet as it were (Violin, Viola, Cello, and Bass). The other two I sat myself down and said “I’m doing this today okay” and then I did it but he’s weird because he just naturally occurred as it were.

I’ve imagined him as something of a moody teen. He’s also kind of defensive and prickly and a bit angsty. He’s sweet under that outer shell of thorns, though. He has something of a inferiority complex to Violin, since as far as I am aware, violas don’t usually get solos in classical orchestra (though I could be 100% wrong and I’m admitting that bc I don’t remember much of symphony orchestra. Actually I remember a lot of symphony, but not enough, sadly).

Violin teases him a lot, but she makes it known that she doesn’t mean any of the joking barbs she throws at Viola. She knows he’s important in his own right, but still the jokes can hurt, so he’s distant from her. He wants the spotlight too, but he’s also a little afraid of it because what if he makes himself a laughingstock when he finally gets his solo? Poor thing.

Design-wise, I think he’d wear probably a dark red hoodie with white trim, or something. Idk. Yes, he wears skinny jeans (in black, probably), and no, I don’t know why I drew him with cuffed pant legs. He’s a Converse kind of guy, I think, and his hair is is a bleach blond. No clue if his hair has any other color in it.

He doesn’t wear his hood up all the time though. When he’s particularly moody, he’ll probably pull it over his head (I imagine his default sprite is him with his hood up because I think he won’t be that open to the player just yet) and close the strings, but otherwise, his hood is up enough because he wants to or it’s down because he wants to.

Imagine though, if the player gets enough “bond points” with him, his default will change to him having his hood down because he’s more comfy with the player, in general (and maybe the player like seeing his face idk) and that’s a barrier broken. Imagine Viola being a cuddlebug with the player because they’re so warm and it feels nice to be around them. Imagine Viola smiling more instead of looking grumpy. Imagine Viola finally opening up and learning that he is worthy of being a string instrument and he is loved and cherished for who he is and that he doesn’t need to be better than Violin to have worth because he is is own person, and that’s what matters.

Imagine him mending fences with Violin in a sidequest. Violin stops teasing him so much (but since she’s like a sister to him, of course she’s going to annoy him- it’s what siblings do) and Viola being more open to her and showing her that warmth he too has.

Gameplay-wise, since he’s a member of the Strings family, he would have a higher ATK stat with lower DEF and HP as a tradeoff. However, he’s more beefy than Violin, who probably is The Glass Tank to the entire String family. Maybe Stradivarius is the Most Glass Tankiest out of all of the Strings. I dunno.

Guitar

Okay, so I’m not gonna lie, Guitar is my favorite design out of the three here. I don’t know if I wanted him to be bishounen or ikemen but since I can’t draw ikemen at freaking all, I went the bishounen route. but I think he’s still more handsome than pretty, so maybe he’s already ikemen?

So, I imagine Guitar as more of a mellow guy. He’s nice, maybe unremarkable, but that’s what’s great about him. He’s definitely handsome though, and he knows it. He’s most definitely a flirt. He takes pride in his appearance, but isn’t vain. Out of the Guitar brothers, he’s probably the most “chill” one. He’s also “cool” because… yknow. Guitars are cool. I’m gonna be honest, I didn’t really didn’t know what else to put for his character, so I might add or change things as I see fit in the future.

Design-wise, I wanted him to be pretty. In fact, the first thing I had in my mind was a white button-down and a vest. What I did not foresee, however, was how much of a pain in the ass drawing a collar was. I forgot how much I hated drawing collared men’s shirts lol. I actually wanted one side to be untucked, giving him like… a roguish?? Sexy??? Vibe. But I decided against it because it didn’t look good At All.

The vest was also a “should I or should I not” thing. Maybe it was because I really liked how I drew the shirt. i was worried that he’d look too formal, but I don’t think he looks too formal after it was finished. The coat slung over his shoulder was a “cool” booster lol. He never wears it, just like he’ll never button the top button of his shirt.

His color palate would probably be tans. White shirt, tan vest. Probably black pants, and the jacket is a wildcard. No clue what color it would be. His hair is probably a sandy brown and shiny. It looks very soft and it very much is. Most of the guitar players I see have long hair and/or a beard, so maybe he’ll have a little stubble? Dunno.

Imagine the player getting enough “bond points” with Guitar and him actually meaning what he says because initially he wanted to tease the player a bit or that was just a way he jokes around but now… he cares for their well-being deeply. Imagine Guitar being goofy and an utter prankster like his brother Electric Guitar. Imagine him being a bad influence to the younger/more impressionable instruments and getting all of them in trouble with the player because he too is cheery and bright but he’s just more well known for being mellow and romantic and smooth and he just keeps up with that image because he’s worried that others view him as strange or they would abandon him because he’s a popular hobby instrument but sometimes hobbies don’t pan out well and he’s been left in some attic alone and unplayed and abandoned only to be sold again to another person.

Imagine him worrying over his brothers because they’re doing something dumb and he has to bail them out. Imagine in a sidequest, he loses his cool and goes absolutely feral because his brothers are in mortal danger when he initially had more of a distant relationship to them.

Gameplay-wise, I imagine him to be a little more like the Brass family (of which I have yet to actually do anything for)- more beef in exchange for ATK. But since he’s from the Strings, he naturally has higher ATK and has more skills associated with the Strings family.

Violin

Okay. I have played violin for over 7 years guys. I haven’t played in an orchestra for a while though so my inf might be outdated or something because I’ve not been in an orchestral environment for two years.

So I’ve imagined Violin to be something of a drama queen? That’s too strong of a word for it, but I can’t think of anything else. Dramatic, perhaps, suits her better. She’s certainly formal and definitely haughty and “cultured” but she’s as cultured my file directory (aka not at all). Well, that’s a lie. She certainly has class. She likes attention but she’s not an attention whore and also she doesn’t have that much of an ego. She takes her job very seriously, too, and is a perfectionist. Perhaps she’s more like Viola than she lets on…

She appreciates the “little guy” as it were and is not one of those “ohime-sama” characters. Yes, there’s a stylistic difference between a fiddle and a violin (bluegrass/country vs classical and jazz), but in the body and neck of the actual instrument, as well as the range, there is very little to no difference. The main differences are the strings (fiddles typically use steel strings for a brighter sound compared to violins which use synthetic or traditional gut strings) and the bridge (flatter for string crossing/chords and rounded for single note playing).

I’m getting ahead of myself. I imagine Violin parties hard in addition to simply being all wound up and “classy”. Like, she’s probably the one doing karaoke and shots and in general being Wild while also being her typical Responsible, Classic, Dramatic self. She’s also quite sweet and is a hopeless romantic, but she has something of a short fuse and can get really scary when she wants to be. She’s probably Disaster Bi.

Design-wise, my first thought was concert blacks. Seriously. Whenever you hear “violin”, please tell me that you, too, hear someone in an elegant black dress, absurdly beautiful and pristine? Just me? Okay. She has beautiful brown hair that’s wavy and silky and soft and maybe it’s magic but it changes color slightly in the light when you see it at a different angle.

Imagine the player getting enough “bond points” with her and she finally starts to let her hair down. Imagine she invites the player to a karaoke bar or simply to a small party/gathering she and a few other instruments have planned because she wants to have fun. Imagine she sets up a drinking game that includes Spin The Bottle or 7 Minutes In Heaven or something because she can be fun and she’s not just uptight and known for being for the nobility. Maybe she’s insecure about how others see her because she’s been seen always as a tightly wound person and she too can have fun and be wild and free and happy and not a stick in the mud. Maybe she’s a perfectionist because that’s what’s been drilled into her from her creation because she’s usually a sign of nobility and nobles have to be perfect and she must be perfect to charm crowds of people and she’s only beautiful because she’s perfect but she’s beautiful even with her imperfections and her quirks and she doesn’t need to be Wild to prove that she can be fun and that’s okay.

Imagine her and Viola making up in a sidequest. She knows that she teases him and pokes fun at him a lot but she really doesn’t mean it. She knows that he’s an important instrument in orchestras and she tells him that yes he is needed and is important and yes, she’ll stop poking fun at him because she realises that her comments actually do hurt and she doesn’t want him to feel unloved. But she’ll still annoy him because that’s what big sisters do but she’ll stay away from those kinds of jokes because she doesn’t mean it and it’s mean so she’ll stop.

Gameplay-wise, she’s definitely on the more glass canon side of things. She has excellent ATK, but her DEF and HP are kinda… shit. I’d pair her with other String instruments that have higher DEF and HP to help balance out her flaws or even put her on a team with Percussion or Brass or even have her with a Woodwind to help with healing and she’ll do the damage necessary.

#rex rambles #rex can't draw #rex can't write #that game that rex keeps developing #rip the readmore went away... Sorry;;;#violin #viola #guitar

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dontblamemebrucemademecrazy · 5 years

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L💘VER

Good morning Swifties! No one asked for my track by track thoughts on Lover but I want to share them anyway so here we go!

I Forgot That You Existed - what. a. great. opener. I love this song, it feels like Taylor shook off her reputation snakeskin and is ready to rock her Lover wings. I can feel the happiness in Taylor’s voice singing this.

Cruel Summer - A WHOLE BOP. I cannot wait to scream at the top of my lungs .~*HE LOOKS UP GRINNING LIKE A DEVIL AND ITS NEWWWWWWW*~. on tour with all my fellow Swifties. One of my absolute favorites on the album (it’s so hard to pick just one favorite so we just won’t go there). This bridge feels like the love child of out of the woods’ bridge and blank space.

Lover - another one of my favorites. This song is just so completely stunning. The only way to describe this song is romantic and timeless. Stunning visuals on the music video. We’ve spent years loving Taylor’s love songs but this song feels like the first song about being truly in love and I think it’s one of the best songs she’s ever written.

The Man - the production on this is fantastic. I would love to see a music video for this, I think the visuals could make such a statement. Love the Leo reference. As a woman who has experience with being treated differently than men in my career, this is 100% being added to my girl power playlist. It almost reminds me of the song in A Star is Born - Why Did You Do That? Which is iconic.

The Archer - this woman’s lyricism is on a different level than anyone else out there. The way she captures anxiety and imposter syndrome so perfectly combined with the instrumental build up makes this song such an emotional trip.

I Think He Knows - love this one! I want to do a flash mob to this song in the middle of Central Park. Can I make cheesy choreography to this and perform it in public and call it a flash mob? No? Ok I still love everything about this song. Fave line - he’s so obsessed with me and Boyyy I understanddddd 😉

Miss Americana and The Heartbreak Prince - this has rep vibes with a dash of I Knew You Were Trouble spice? I feel like such a moody queen breaking it down while singing “miss amer-i-can-a and the heart-break prince (OKAY)”. Love how different this sounds than the first set of songs.

Paper Rings - ok Taylor???? Take my money, my soul and dignity with this song. This one is soooooooo fun! I love the instruments (especially the drums) in this one. Stay Stay Stay’s older cooler pop punk sister is alive and well in this song.

Cornelia Street - wow, I feel like I am sitting in the back of the car with Taylor and experiencing the flash forwards of this relationship when I listen to this one. My heart aches when I listen to this song. The chorus makes me want to emotionally sway and scream the lyrics with my bestie while wine drunk. Love the reference to love being her religion (hi don’t blame me)

Death By A Thousand Cuts - brb spending the rest of my life trying to learn how to play this on guitar. Another one of my favorites, the lyricism is outstanding, production is beautiful. Fave lyric in this one - I ask the traffic lights if it’ll be alright, they say I.. don’t... know. Also love the “my”s echoing in the background of the bridge. Love love love this one.

London Boy - this one gives me big end game / king of my heart vibes for some reason. I just took a trip to London a few weeks ago and I feel like I can sing this song with so much more passion now that I know the places she’s referencing 😂 it’s a cute bop. Taylor if you ever wanna day drink in the afternoon in Soho, let me know!

Soon You’ll Get Better - this is going to be one of the Taylor songs that I can’t listen to often. The lyrics hit too close to home, I can only imagine how hard this was to write and record. Taylor, this song is so beautiful. Sending all my love to you and your family.

False God - ok, so this song is SEXY sexy. That sax. The accent voice (idk what this is called?). Dress is found rolled up in a ball in the back of Taylor’s closet. Phew, this song is such a mood.

You Need To Calm Down - a bop since it first came out. Music video is legendary. Big Swift Evergy in this song. I blame this song for me telling everyone who exists that they need to calm down.

Afterglow - I think this song really ties into the theme that Taylor is going for on Lover. This song is so important, there are moments like this in relationships and the lyrics really hit home. Love isn’t always the “Lover” and “I Think He Knows” moments. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a song from any other artist that’s captured this aspect of relationships so perfectly. Fave line - why’d I have to break what I love so much?

Me! - again another bop since day one. Love how it fits in with the rest of the album. Self love is so important everyone!!!! You have to love yourself and see your worth in a relationship! Catch me trying to hit the high heee heeee heeeeee notes for the rest of my life.

It’s Nice To Have A Friend - probably the most interesting song on the whole album. The way she maintains the same emotion while singing the entire song is very non-Taylor esque if that makes sense? I feel like we’re so used to hearing her pour emotion into her delivery. I would love to hear more on the background and songwriting process for this one. I can’t stop listening to this track.

Daylight - wow what a breath of fresh air. This feels so airy and I can feel the weight being lifted off of Taylor shoulders. Perfect song to walk to watch the sunrise in the morning with good headphones. Feels like a new beginning but it’s the closing track which is so cool. I love the way she sings “it’s brighter now”. Love the reference back to Red. Perfect closing track.

@taylorswift this record is an absolute masterpiece and I am SO proud to be your fan. This is some of your best work and you should be extremely proud of yourself - this is YOURS. No one can take that away from you. You deserve all the success in the world, can’t wait to watch how the rest of this era unfolds. I’ll be by your side until the very end 💘

Thanks for coming to my Taylor Talk. @taylornation

#lover #lover review #taylurking #taylornation

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hermioneisavirgo-blog · 5 years

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Lover Album Review

After listening to Taylor Swift’s 18-track album all the way through, my mind is blown. I grew up with Taylor’s music, as I first heard “Fearless” when I was 12 years old and have been an avid listener ever since. I just moved into my first apartment in Minneapolis, and I am so pleased that “Lover” can be the soundtrack to the beginning of the rest of my life.

“I Forgot That You Existed” is a banger for a first track. This song emulates a different emotion than we have heard from Taylor before. The upbeat background and snaps create a foundation of optimism, goofiness, and sheer “indifference”. The lyrics are words that anybody can relate to - who hasn’t experienced that blissful feeling when you recognize that you haven’t thought of that dreaded person who shall not be named for days, or even weeks? I was instantly pulled in with this opener.

“Cruel Summer” made me fall in love even more. The beat immediately made me feel like an August night of sitting in the back of an Uber with my friends on a Friday night, windows rolled down and hair going crazy. With this track, we get our first “blue” used in the album. If you’ve listened, you know that the word “blue” appears all over the place. Taylor exemplifies the poetess in her with lines like, “Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes, and if I bleed you’ll be the last to know.”

“Lover”...what can I even say? Not much - this is first dance wedding reception material. This gives me such flashbacks to some of Taylor’s older country-esque songs, with bright-eyed excitement. I get the same feeling here as I do when I listen to “Enchanted” or “Hey Stephen”. However, in contrast to those songs, here she is taking control and stands in a pool of her own confidence as she boldly professes that she has grown and made strides from her days of hopelessly pining for men who weren’t really worth her time.

“The Man”. Okay. Thank you so much for this, Taylor. Made me think of “If I Were a Boy” by Beyonce. This is infused with the feeling of being “tired and angry” like “somebody should be”, which is how Halsey describes similar feelings of being bothered how the lowly boys of this world seem to get whatever the heck they want. You really would be the man, Taylor. Think, for real, as she’s even said in interviews: if she were a man writing songs about even the shortest of flings, that would never be considered taboo and worthy of shaming. This is made evident by the thousands of male singer-songwriters who do just that and are widely accepted.

“The Archer” gave me “Red” album vibes, but that’s just me. “I hate my reflection for years and years...” really got me. From the very beginning of this song, the underlying line grows steadily. It almost feels like one of those never-ending videos where the tone appears to be increasing but never really does...gave me a sense of infinity. Very lush, injected with an emotional pen as she recalls different perspectives from different lovers and relationships.

“I Think He Knows” made me want to DANCE. And I did. A lot. The beat is almost hip-hop club-ish with the bass. It seemed like such an interesting song in contrast to “I Know Places”, from “1989″, which has a haunting sound and alludes to the idea that it’s hard for Taylor to ever feel like she has privacy with her private life. With this song, she isn’t focused on the people looking in at her life, but instead she delves into that private relationship. It makes me feel like she is caring less and less about what people see and what people know. She’s just LIVING her life.

And now, we have reached my favorite song of the album. Thanks for this one, Taylor. Seriously. “Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince” doesn’t even sound like any “type” of Taylor we’ve heard before. With the very beginning notes, I called it that I would cry by the end of this. The first verse immediately made me picture the “You Belong With Me” music video with the band uniform and prom dress. Taylor portrays two different sides of a coin in that video, and I feel a bit of that in this song. I really hope she does a music video of this song. I have always loved her more haunting melodies, particularly in the “Red” album (or in “Dancing With Our Hands Tied” - the most underrated song on "reputation”), but this took it to an entirely new level. I am OBSESSED.

“Paper Rings” is so playful, and a great mental break after processing the absurd depth in the previous song. Gave me “Stay, Stay, Stay” vibes. She sound so jovial and happy in this song, and I am so glad to hear her this way.

“Cornelia Street” is one of the fully Taylor Swift-composed songs on the album. This type of song I see myself rocking out to as I power walk down the street in autumn. In the lyrics, she talks about how losing this love would be devastating to the point of taking eternity to heal from. It is a familiar feeling, when you are in so deep with someone who you feel has become a part of you, impermeably and forever.

“Death By a Thousand Cuts” starts off by explaining just what she means. “Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts...” which is an interesting line to hear right after “Cornelia Street”, which invests in the narrative that saying goodbye would be an impossible feat after experiencing connection this strong. The instruments in this song are layered (clear guitar at the beginning with shuffling beats that come in and even something that sounds like a harpsichord??) and even though the message is a painful one, this baroque-poppy feel makes me want to DANCE MORE. But maybe with a lot of moves that make it look like I am in excruciating pain lol.

“London Boy”’s beat is fire flame. It’s a give-in that this song is about Joe Alwyn and as someone who has seen “The Favourite”, I can attest to the dimples and the accent. It’s clear her relationship is not only a a deep love, but also lots of fun, adventure, stepping outside her comfort zone, and recognizing that she can find home in someone who doesn’t live in her own backyard (*ahem* “White Horse”).

“Soon You’ll Get Better” (feat. Dixie Chicks) is simply beautiful. Reminiscent of her country days, as well. Reminds me of “Never Grow Up”. Since the speculation is that this song is about her mother, I find it poignant and very “Taylor” that it’s track 12. “The Best Day” is also track 12 on “Fearless” and was always one of my favorites. Underneath the main message of trying to find comfort in a super tough and scary time, I find that Taylor is enunciating the idea that she is growing up and things will change in her relationship to her parents no matter what. That’s just the way of life. Very moving.

“False God” begins with a sexy little saxophone riff. Shortly after, we get to hear that poetic line she teased on her Spotify playlist: “And I can’t talk to you when you’re like this...staring out the window like I’m not your favorite town - I’m New York City!” The message with this song gives me a “bigger picture” sense. Even though she is making references to heaven and hell within interactions with her lover, I can also view the “times like this” that “they warned us about” as the times we are living in now: terrifying and unclear with a leader who professes division and tearing down much more than love and building up.

“You Need To Calm Down” is by far the single that I listened to the most before the album dropped. As a queer woman who “passes” as a “straight” cis woman and who took a very long time to admit to herself and others the truth, this song greatly boosted my confidence in Taylor as she opens up about where she stands, loudly and proudly. And that beat is so VIBRANT and fun.

At the start of “Afterglow”, we get yet ANOTHER use of “blue”. (There are lots that I didn’t mention, but it just is so prominent here.) This is a beautiful, lush, apology song in which Taylor unveils how deeply she wants her lover to stay despite her shortcomings and miscommunications. I felt this one hard and wish I could play it for a lot of my ex-best friends.

“ME!” (feat. Brendon Urie of Panic! At The Disco) is colorful, glorious, confident, cheerful, and is something that I could see being played at a pep rally. The message is clear: being yourself will ultimately win you every prize that is yours to win. Whether that be a lover or whatever your heart desires!! This is a truth I have come to realize recently. It’s a hard, treacherous lesson, and I feel that Taylor is showing that she’s finally finding out what it means to be truly herself with this tune.

“It’s Nice To Have A Friend” is the cutest song Taylor has ever written and recorded, by far. I think I hear steel pan in the background, adding to the layered sound of playfulness. That trumpet in the middle is so triumphant and an interesting addition to the dynamic! It feels very innocent and loving, maybe she wrote this with her cats in mind :)

“Daylight” is a gorgeous closing track. As this wraps up the album, it is quite clear that Taylor feels like she can breathe more deeply now that she has met, known, and loved her lover. It appears that everything has changed, and she can see much more clearly. This song made me think of “Clean” from “1989″, due to the notion that she is leaving the darkness and fogginess and entering a world where she feels fresh and sees everything clearly. Her lover is obviously a wonderful match for her spunky, stoked, sensitive, Sagittarius self. “You are what you love.” What a precious way to close my favorite new album.

Overall - Taylor’s “Lover” incorporates many familiar Taylor sounds while also introducing lots of new things we’ve never heard. From the lush synths in “Cruel Summer” to Cautious Clay’s influence in “London Boy”, it is clear that Taylor has crafted something that signifies a new era for her. As she turns 30 at the end of this year, she has seven studio albums to be extremely proud of. Thank you, Taylor, for being such a strong beam of light as I navigated high school hallways, college parties, and the ups and downs of falling in love.

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colderpartz · 5 years

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from: @freedom-books-flowers-moon

zinc white; how are you really feeling today? no one-word answers please! im feeling sum type of way rn. very tiredt and burnt out from the school year.

cadmium yellow; when you think of the word “happy” what’s the first thing that comes to mind? that feeling when you’re laughing so hard with your best friends and you realize where you are and where you’re with.

lemon; what’s your comfort food? dumplings

hansa yellow; what’s your guilty pleasure song? do ya think im sexy by rod steward

yellow ochre; name an artist/band whom you just discovered & can’t get enough of!!! foxygen :)

naples yellow; where do you feel most at home? in my room, in my sister’s car, or at gigs

raw sienna; with whom do you feel most at home? my sister

golden ochre; describe the relationship you have with your closest friend: she makes me laugh until i cry, and when i cry she knows how to make me laugh. she takes care of me and i take care of her. she is my soulmate :)

golden deep; what’s your favorite season? summer

cadmium orange; what do you like to do on your days off? hang out with my friends or if im alone i create

orange lake; do you have anyone you can turn to when you’re sad? yes, but i mostly interalize things (my cap moon JUMPED out)

titans; do you prefer slow mornings or relaxing evenings? slow morning

shakhnazaryan red; are you currently binge-watching anything? fosse/verdon

red ochre; are you more right-brained (creative) or left-brained (analytical)? right brained but i just took a test and it was in the middle :/

burnt sienna; is there a painting that brings you peace when you look at it? nighthawks babey. i wanna be in the bar with no doors.

english red; what animal do you relate to most? a black cat that crawls out of the bushes while you’re walking home at midnight.

vermilion; what’s your favorite accent? i actually don’t rlly care for accents :/ i know it like turns a lot of ppl on but it just distracts me.

cadmium red; do you have a “type” when it comes to a significant other? yes i have a very specific type. taller than me, brown curly hair, nice prepy or glam clothing, dry sense of humor, scorpio or capricorn, plays some sort of instrument or is a creative type.

scarlet; describe your current crush/es: very beautiful, intelligent, and completely overly understanding. someone who even though they don’t have the same interests as you, will talk to you about whatever you’re passionate about. amazingly supportive. and a little pretentious but i like it :)

ruby; what does your ideal first date look like? very sponatious trip to the city at night where we see a gig and then kiss with the skyline behind us.

carmine; what does your ideal second date look like? lol sex

madder lake red; would you ever kiss someone (or accept a kiss) on a first date? yea duh

rose; what’s something really positive going on in your life right now? making my first real short film (even though its for school) and having so many great friends in my life

quinacridone rose; what’s something you’re really looking forward to? becoming a successful musician or filmmaker, but short term finishing up this year of school.

violet rose; what does your dream house look like? ok not to flex with this taurus materlism but a 1970s house or mid-century modern with an atrium, with velvet seating and silk sheets, a big living space for parties, an in-home movie theater, and a studio

violet; is there any place in particular you’d like to settle down? los angeles or new york city, wherever i can make my movies.

blue lake; what would you like to do/accomplish before you settle down? i hate the idea of settling down. I never want to retire and I want to love going to work every day. But I would like to go on tour with my band, graduate film school, become a famous filmmaker, win an oscar, and surround myself with people who inspire me and each other to be the best artists we can be.

cobalt blue spectral; what is the most beautiful place you have ever been to? San Fransisco.

ultramarine; when was the last time you were in a good mood? do you know/remember what sparked it? rn bc im on facetime with my baby <3

blue; what’s the most recent dream you remember? lol sex dream

bright blue; what does your dream family look like? any kids or pets? how many of each? me, my partner and our closest friends. it’s like friends but w/o ross. I’m Joey and I married Chandler.

blue cobalt; do you like your name? would you give yourself a different name if you could? i did give myself a different name lol and now its my legal name.

prussian azure; what’s your favorite scent? cinnamon, pine, or gardenia.

azure blue; what’s your favorite type of tea, if any? chai or matcha

turquoise blue; if you could start a garden, what would you plant? maybe Japanese flowers? or roses obviously, maybe succulents.

cerulean blue; if you were guaranteed to have a viewership, would you start a youtube vlog? nah im too dry to be a youtuber.

glauconite; describe your body without using any negative adjectives: leo rising

yellow green; picture yourself walking in a field. what do you see & hear in this scenario?: I hear the birds chirping, I see the wheat swaying and I hear tin man by america playing.

green light; are you in a comfortable place in life? if not, what do you think might make it better? I’m consistenly attempting to strive to be in a farther place than I am. I am young and there is way more life ahead of me and I can’t wait to expirence it.

green; name three countries you want to visit; do you have any actual plans in place to visit any of them? France, Italy, Japan ; no

emerald green; do you speak any languages besides english? are there any additional languages you want to learn? nope and i don’t really have an interest to learn any for fun.

oxide of chromium; what’s your favorite book? (mom im so sorry) the heart race of a mouse by anna green

olive green; are you currently reading anything? how do you like it so far? no i can’t read

mars brown; what’s a movie that always puts a smile on your face/makes you laugh? OH BOY I DO. Ratatouille or any disney movie, juno, scott pilgrim, dead poets society (also it will make me sob), baby driver, ferris buellers day off, little shop of horros, SCHOOL OF ROCK, napoleon dynamite

burnt umber; what’s something you plan to do before the day is over to take care of yourself? give myself alone time.

umber; have you drank enough water today? nah i have a headache

voronezhskaya black; what or who is your go-to outlet for when you need to vent? writing, deep self reflection, and talking to my sister.

sepia; name five things that always make you happy: astrology, film, music, my possessions, and my best friends

indigo; what’s the best/sweetest compliment you have ever received? a few of people have told me that i’m destined to do great things.

payne’s gray; describe your aesthetic? currently: velvet, candlesticks with wax dripping down it, vanity tables backstages with tons of makeup and clutter covering it, glitter on cheeks, men being comfortable with other men, reading a journal of someone 50 yrs ago and falling in love with them, the city at night, being in the crowd at a concert, an underground cabaret show

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kitesupportgroup · 5 years

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Be More Chill OBCR 💛💊

So the bmc obcr has been out for a bit now, (and I love it so very much) so I decided to write down all of my favourite things it- if not for other bmc fans but for myself. Enjoy reading through everything I love!!!

****This is not finished, but I ran over the character limit so I’ll be constantly updating this on reblogs! Look out for the most recent ones!!!****

(Btw It’s not all new additions to the album but just everything)

Jeremy’s Theme:

I mean. I love the be more chill band so much.

With the universal Be More Chill sound?

How could I not love this!!!!

And the amazing theremin?

(That’s what that instrument is called)

(I looked up ‘electric stick instrument’ to figure out what it was)

It’s just terrific

100000000/10

More Than Survive:

Will Roland’s voice (and Will Roland in general)

How unenthusiastic ‘good morning, time to start the day’ is

The addition of the parts part between Jeremy and mr. heere on the recording

‘Dude!’ (Weight the options)

‘Oh god!’

Will Roland’s voice (and Will Roland in general)

When the whole cast comes in on the third ‘c-c-c-come on!’

The new hallway lines (I’ve literally never noticed him before)

The dramatic music when Rich writes on Jeremy’s backpack

‘Oh! It’s a sign up for the after school play!’ *pause* ‘It’s a sign up sheet for getting called gay’

‘End scene’

‘Christiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine’ (new harmonies+notes ahhhhh!!!!!!)

‘No need to wallow, no’

Will Roland’s voice (and Will Roland in general)

MICHAEL!!!!

Just George Salazar

Just Michael Mell

‘You look like ass, what’s wrong?’

‘My mothers would be thrilled!’

‘That’s... good?’

[I was gonna say] ‘Getting atoned in my basement’

THE CHRISTINE HARMONIES YALL HAVE MY HEART

The band is so incredible I can’t

The ooooooooooooooo harmonies when Jeremy is signing up for the play

‘Gayyyyyy!’

‘I like gay people’

THE WHOLE LEAD UP TO MORE THAN SURVIVE ITS SO SOFT AND GENUINE WILL YOU WONDERFUL HUMAN

‘Whyyyy’

‘And teach me how to thrive’

THE INSTRUMENTS COMING IN AT THAT PART THEN THE NANANANANA’S

I LITERALLY LOVE THIS SO MUCH THIS PART GIVES ME CHILLS

Will’s bits AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

‘SUR VIIIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIIII-IIIIIIIIII VEEE!’

‘GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GO GOOOOO GO!’

I Love Play Rehearsal

Stephanie Hsu. Just. She’s a queen. No- a goddess

The way she says ‘because it is fun.’

And the pause between ‘because it is fun’ and ‘...I love play rehearsal’

‘not depressed as in like’ bit

MAD GIGANTIC FEELINGS

‘I also have a touch of ADD

where was I?

Oh, right!’

‘The way it works out in the Pla-aa-y’

‘Centre of attention’

‘That was, really one of my best roles’ THAT VOICE💛

‘Do you find that? *pause that Jeremy clearly cant respond in time* Cause I totally find that!’

‘Why-y-y-y-y’

‘I *punch* LOVE *punch* PLAY REHEARSAL!’

‘Hives’

‘Why’m’

‘There’s also a part of me that wants to do this *adorable weird noises* yasss’

‘So I did it *giggles*’

‘My brain is like bzzz, my heart is like wow’

‘And it’s starrrrrting,

starrrrrting

it’s starrrrrrting,

sooooooooooooooon’

More Than Survive (Reprise)

I’m sorry. A NEW SONG?!

I LOVE IT AND THE TONE AND TUNE AND BAND AND WILL

the fact that ‘at least I didn’t have a breakdown, and have to go to the nurse’ suggest that this has happened to Jeremy before I NEED TO PROTECT HIM

Just the whole set up- it’s what touching my hand aimed to do but shorter and wonderful

The Squip Song:

I realise I’ve added this to everything but Gerard Canonico and his voice I love him

The start instrumental

The way he sings ‘girlfriend’ (idk why i just love)

‘Gross’

‘Futile quest’

‘I would trip!’

‘Then then, Then then, Then then, Then then, Then then, Then then, I got a SQUIP!’

‘You got quick?!!’ Jeremy is so excited aw

‘Not quick. SQUIP’

That entire conversation

Just the entire: It's from Japan

It's a gray, oblong pill

Quantum nano-technology CPU

The quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until

It implants in your brain and it tells you what to do’ part

And of course ‘so... it’s like drugs?’

*deep breath*

‘IT’S FROM JAPAAAAAAAAAAN!’

The techno ness on Rich’s voice

The band

THE HARMONIES

‘Almost hopeless’

‘Yeah, your whole life will flip’

‘Squi-I-I-p’

ALL OF THE SQUIIIIIP BITS WOAH rich GO OFF

Two-Player Game:

Can I just say- one of the cutest songs ever

The part where the intro is all slow after Jeremy and Michael are yelling so excitedly I laugh at it every time

The whole intro sequence basically

The band is amazing

Will and George’s voice’s sound so good together 💛

Michael YOU ARE SO DAMN CUTE

‘pac-man tattoo!’

‘Guys like us!’

‘Listen, bro’

Zombie! Watch out! Ah! Aoh! Awww’

Will’s voice ahhhhHH

‘Dude, I know, I get it!’

‘But we’re not in college’

‘All the same’

‘Ahh! Ohh... ZOMBIE! BLOOD! CLAWS! Pause’

YOU KNOW THAT YOU ARE NY FAVOURITE PERSON IS SO CUTE

‘I’m your favworite pwerson’

JEREMY’S CUTE LIL ‘yes! *giggle*’

‘Conquer it!’

‘Two... PLAYER GAME!!!’

THE BAND IS SO AMAZING

‘Two player gammmmmme!’

THE LAST FEW HARMONIES I LOVE

The Squip Enters:

Woah it’s so short but I have so much to say

STARTING OFF BY JUST SAYING HOW GREAT THE BAND AND SOUND DESIGN FOR THIS IS I MEAN WOW

Jason Tam’s Squip voice 💛

‘What the hell?!’

Will’s screaming and yelling and noises I love

Christine is so concerned!!!!!!!

‘Mild?!?!’

Jake. That’s all. 💛

‘Oh- wait. I’m fine. I jus-‘

‘Discomfort level may increase’ *yelling intensifies*

‘Welcome to your Super Quantum Unit Intel Processer. Your SQUIP.’

Jeremy is so awestruck and cute

‘You look like Keanu Reeves!’

‘But I can see you may prefer to take instructions from Batman, Beyoncé, a sexy anime cat girl with a tail’ ‘KEANU’S FINE’

‘Can everyone see you?’ ‘I exist only in your mind. All they see is you having an animated conversation with yourself- so don’t do that.’

‘Like in X-Men?’ ‘I can see this is going to be difficult’ OH BURN OH DAMN I LOVE IT WOAHH (really tho this makes me laugh so much every time)

‘You want to be more chill?’

‘Oh, you mean cool!’

‘I do not’

Be More Chill, Pt. 1:

Okay but the Squip enters moves so smoothly into be more chill pt.1 woah

NEW INTRODUCTION ITS AMAZING

The ‘c-c-c-Come on’

THE ENTIRE KEY THAT THE BEW INTRO IS IN THO

THE WAY JASON SINGS ‘outdated’ assffhfkglsherb

‘I’ve arrived now, this is not a drill’

‘Be. More. Chill’

‘wow’ (Jeremy you’re so cute)

‘Oh but I am a masturbator’ ‘we’ll fix that’

‘I thought I was more of a... geek?’

‘Wha- stammer? N- I I I. I don’t stamme-‘

‘Non existent’

‘Buh’ ‘Uh-’ ‘Buh?’ ‘Uh!-‘ ‘No.’ ‘UH!’ ‘Stop.’ ‘DOGH!’

‘Everything about you is so terrible’ ‘Terrible?’ ‘Teribble’ ‘oh’

Jeremy sounds so dejected and sad on that ‘oh’ I need to protect him

‘....makes me wanna die’ *hyperventilating*

‘So DONT freak out’

‘It says Eminem’

‘If you’re so astute, what’d’ya need me for?’

‘I envision a future in which you wear a Eminem shirt and things turn out well’ *foreshadowing*

When the whole cast starts singing ‘everything about you sucks’ you can hear individual voices in it and at one point I swear you can hear George doing some weird voice and I love it

‘Now you try picking a shirt’ ‘That’s a girls shirt’

‘Jerry?’

‘Jerry-me’ or ‘Jerry-my’ (I always think of Jeremy being shocked about Chloe talking to him so he’s just like ‘Jerry? Me!’

‘Oh- Hi, Brooke’

‘You look sexy.’ ‘I cant say that to a hot girl- AOWWW’

‘LOOKING-PRETTY-SEXY-BROOKAHH’

‘No! Yess (????!)’

The entire round part I LOVE IT

‘Just like this HAHA’ SO ADORABLE

‘So who was this mystery girl?’

‘Oh you’ve probably never heard of (SQUIP HELP ME OUT HERE)’

‘Madeline’

‘What.’

‘She’s Fre-e-e-e-e-ench!’

‘She is not French! She just pretends to be for attention’ *radiating disdain*

Brooke is SO CUTE

‘Yeah- I mean- (????!!!!!)’

‘Because she was cheating on me-E-eeee-E-eeee-Eeeeeeh’ (YES I LOVE)

‘Hey. Hamlet. Be. More. Chill’

Leading into do you wanna ride!!!!

Do You Wanna Ride?

Okay but Lauren Marcus is literally amazing

And Brooke is amazing

The way the Squip and Jeremy day ‘Yes!’ At the sane time

‘Mich-ael’

Brooke is trying so hard to be seductive and it’s so damn cute

‘Do you wanna get inside my mothers car?’

‘Ah, hah’

‘We gotta stop for frozen yogurt first!’

When the incredible Katlyn Carson comes in GO CHLOE

Harmonies 💛💛

The band 💛💛

And, of course:

‘PII-IIINNNIN-IN-IN-IN-INK berrrrryyyyy

*giggles* ‘Au revoir’

SHE’S BEING FRENCH TO IMPRESS JEREMY

SHE’S SO CUTE

Be More Chill, Pt. 2

‘Repeat after me’

‘Everything about me is just... terrible’

‘Good.’

THE SQUIP IS SO MANIPULATIVE

‘Everything about you makes me wanna die’

‘Everything about me makes me... wanna die?’

‘Now you’ve got it.’

THE WAY THE BAND COMES IN

‘ABout you’

THE CAST

JASON TAM

‘Cool’ ‘Cool!’ ‘And powerful’ ‘wow!’ ‘And popular’ ‘*giggles* ‘incredible’ ‘woah!’

The accordion thing in the aforementioned section? Amazing

‘You wi-i-i-i-i-i-ill’

‘Be More Chilll! *giggles*’ JEREMY YOU ARE SUCH A PRECIOUS BEAN

*squip, probably face-palming* ‘be more chill’

THE CAST

Sync Up

*ahem* SCREAMING

THIS NEW SONG

IS AMAZING

LITERALLY

CANNOT

I have so much to say

Let’s go

First of all, the original more than survive reprise starts us off. I love it

‘C-c-c-Cmon, c-c-c-cmon go g-AHHH!’

‘I’m inside your brain’

I can’t write all of the lyrics as highlights but just know that all of the lyrics are highlights

‘Let’s sync up!’

‘Those facts are not mutually exclusive’

I LOVE HOW THIS SONG SHOWS EVERYONES FLAWS AND FEARS

‘I’m shook, I’m blah, I’m just-’ ‘there-there’ ‘Brooke!’ ‘I’m sorry’ ‘it’s not fair’ ‘Yeah?’ ‘I know’ ‘oh we so sync up’

That entire bit I just

‘But as soon as she shares it, they ignore her’ ‘that’s sad. What should I do?’ *pause* ‘you should ignore her*

‘Up-Up-Down-Down-Left-Right-A’

‘The only controller you need is your mind!’

‘Looks like Jeremy’s killin’’

The electronic ‘lets sync up’ bits

THE BAND IS SO AMAZING THE ELECTRONIC COMPONENTS AND THE EVERYTHING

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preserving-ferretbrain · 5 years

Text

City of Celluloid

by Dan H

Sunday, 01 September 2013

Dan has seen the City of Bones movie.

Uh-oh! This is in the Axis of Awful...~

I first reviewed Cassandra Cla(i)re's City of Bones in the halcyon days of 2008.

Today, Kyra and I went to see the movie!

Umm...

Long time readers (or people who read the review I linked to above) may recall that I found the original book of City of Bones so blisteringly incoherent that I was barely able to write about it in any kind of sensible manner.

The movie is worse.

Kyra and I saw this film in the tiny, crappy screen at the Odeon on Magdalen Street, an experience we shared with about a dozen other people, all of whom seemed to be having a similarly terrible experience.

Just as with the original book, I really don't know where to start. Because this film is awful in nearly every conceivable way.

Let's start with the good bits:

Good Bit: The Cast are Actually Pretty Cool

Jamie Campbell-Bower is actually really good as Fanon Draco. In the book, I felt that his constant wisecracking revealed less about the character's emotional turmoil than about the author's desire to show off her ability to write one-liners. Campbell-Bower's delivery, though, actually manages to create the impression that I always felt the book was aiming for but failed to achieve – that Fanon Draco is hiding behind playful or dismissive language in order to avoid confronting his feelings.

Lily Collins is a bit generic as Clary but then, really, what does she have to work with. She's … a girl? She has special powers? She's hot for Fanon Draco?

Robert Sheehan (the guy that plays Immortal Kid in Misfits) does a reasonable turn as Simon, although again there isn't a huge amount to do with the character. He wears glasses (temporarily). He has a raging case of nice-guy-syndrome. Meh. I swear he's taller in this than he is in other stuff.

Perhaps most excitingly (even more excitingly than Jamie Campbell-Bower, and I love Jamie Campbell-Bower), Jonathan Rhys Meyers does a fabulously scenery-chewing turn as Valentine. And boy does he need it, because if he stopped raging around and roaring for ten seconds, you might have to ask yourself what the holy fucking hell is actually supposed to be happening, and then you'd probably have to go and cry.

Incidentally, I think it probably says something about the way things work in Hollywood that the teenage protagonists of this film are played by actors in their mid twenties, while their father is played by an actor in his mid thirties. Clearly Valentine was extraordinarily sexually precocious (even if we ignore the fact that Collins and Campbell-Bower are the best part of a decade older than the characters they portray, Rhys-Meyers' Valentine would still have to have started breeding at nineteen to have two seventeen-year-old kids).

Good Bit: It Is Quite Visually Interesting

Part of the fun of this kind of film is that it lends itself quite well to spectacle, and in the beginning the film-makers do a really good job of establishing a visual style, whether it's the Hogwarts-esque grandeur of the institute, the hundreds of Shadowhunter runes that Clary draws in her sleep, or the grotesque, body-splitting demons.

Some of these images might come from the book. I honestly don't remember. I'm pretty sure that the device of Clary drawing Shadowhunter runes is film-only, and I seem to recall that the entire concept of Demons being able to possess people is contrary to book-canon (where Demons are fairly specifically greebly monsters that eat you).

Having said the film is quite visually interesting, I should backtrack a little and say that the film is quite visually interesting in kind of its first half. After they get to the Institute things just get very, very lazy. Big generic flappy-winged monsters. Generic black-and-red demons who look weirdly like the dudes that the Zin send after you in Saints' Row IV

Although Valentine does make a pentagram out of swords. For which plus ten points for swords, minus six points because the pentagram is such an obvious symbol.

And now the rest:

Bad Bit: What The Fuck Is Going On?

So Clary is drawing runes. Then she meets a guy who only she can see. Then later other people can see him.

Then her mum gets attacked by dudes who are looking for the Mortal Cup, so she drinks some kind of magic coma potion because that is apparently the thing you do in that situation.

Then Clary gets attacked by a demon, and the guy rescues her.

Then they do a lot of running around, and the guy who we saw with her mum earlier said he was only hanging out with her to get the cup.

Then they go to this place called the institute. Some people are vaguely rude to Clary. Others aren't.

Clary works out that Damien from Gossip Girl is both gay and in love with Fanon Draco, despite the fact that he has said one sentence and been on screen for eight seconds.

Then Clary goes to see the Silent Brothers. This is one of the bits that are vaguely visually interesting. She has a vision where she sees the name Bane (well, actually she see a series of dots, but Fanon Draco realises that the dots are really, umm, the spaces around the letters in the word BANE witten in block caps. Because her brain stored the negative image. Apparently).

Then they go to see a Warlock. It is vitally important that before they do this that (a) Clary get dressed up in sexy clothes and (b) everybody including Clary take the time to observe that she looks like a hooker, because while it is important for women to dress sexily, it is also important to remember that women who dress sexily are gigantic whores.

The warlock agrees to help them because he is gay, and therefore fancies Damien from Gossip Girl, because all gay men are instantly attracted to all other gay men. The warlock is not wearing any trousers. I am not making this up.

The Immortal Kid from Misfits is captured by vampires for no clear reason.

Something something werewolves something something.

Then there is a scene in a garden where it is all romantic and you know it is romantic because they kiss, but also because there is an extraordinarily loud and intrusive love song played over the top.

Then I think Clary works out where the Mortal Cup is, because she is drinking tea while reading a book, and suddenly the teacup goes inside the page like a picture.

Then they fight a scary black woman.

Then Clary gets the Mortal Cup. Then the man with the grey hair opens the big water portal and Valentine comes through.

Then there is a really, really long fight scene.

No, I mean, like really, really long.

I mean, like half an hour in a two hour movie.

There is a flamethrower. Why is there a flamethrower?

Clary does magic with her glowing dildo pen to freeze some demons.

Did I mention flamethrower?

Grey hair man is a good guy again?

Valentine is everybody's father.

They win?

More glowing dildo magic?

Clary and Fanon Draco drive away on a motorcycle. At a slow walking pace.

Potentially Hilarious Bit: Deviations From Canon

The thing I find most uplifting about the Mortal Instruments movie is that now not only will there be fanfiction based on a novel series based on fanfiction of a different novel series, but there will now be schisms within that fandom between book fans and movie fans.

I read City of Bones five years ago, so I don't really remember it at all well, but I'm pretty sure there were some pretty big changes from book-canon. I'm almost certain that the final confrontation in the original book doesn't take place in the Institute, and Valentine's motivations in the movie are a lot less morally ambiguous, in that he's fairly explicitly trying to take over the world with an army of demons rather than just wipe out the downworlders (I might also point out that the word “downworlder” only appears once in the entire movie).

At the risk of sounding like a horrible nerd and closeted Cla(i)re fanboy, I was strangely irritated by the fact that Valentine, in the film, is able to summon an army of demons by using sort of generic magic, since in the book of City of Ashes a major plot-point is that he needs the Mortal Sword for exactly that purpose.

Other changes form canon just made sense. For example, in the film, Valentine more or less states outright that he used the same kind of memory magic that Marcus Bane used on Clary in order to make Fanon Draco forget that he was raised by the most famous and reviled person in the history of his people. Now actually I'm pretty sure that this isn't possible under book-canon. Shadowhunter magic is runes and only runes, you'd need a warlock for a memory-block, and there's no way that Valentine would have gone to one. But here the film-makers did basically the best they could with what they had. The alternative would be to just go with what it says in the book, which is that Fanon Draco just completley failed to realise that the man who raised him looked exactly like the man whose picture is all over the Institute.

The film also strongly implied that the man Fanon Draco remembered as his father wore an enormous hood at all times.

On the subject of Fanon Draco's heritage, the film inexplicably chose to keep the nonsensical “M turned upside down” plot point from the book, and translated to a visual medium it has exactly the problem I pointed out in my original article. During the climactic scene, when Fanon Draco is staring at his hand and realising to his horror that what he thought was a W is actually an M, the camera is showing us the ring from the other side as it has more or less consistently throughout the entire movie so we are only just seeing it as a W when for us it has been an M for the rest of the film.

Also, the scene with the ring is also pretty much the first time we learn the surnames of either Valentine or Fanon Draco.

The final change from book-canon is to do with the … umm … incest.

A major plot point in The Mortal Instruments is that Clary and Fanon Draco want to be together but can't because they're brother and sister. At the end of the final book, it turns out that Valentine actually isn't Fanon Draco's father at all, he just did weird angel-blood experiments on him while he was still in the womb.

Now I could be wrong, but I think the film-makers really didn't want two and a half movies in which their male and female leads spent half their time seriously contemplating incestuous sex, so they put the “not his real father” line in before any of the other revelations. So now after Valentine shows up in the Institute, he has a conversation with Hodge, where Hodge says “hey, if you really wanted to screw with those guys you could lie and tell them they were brother and sister.” This somewhat alters the context of everything that happens next, and everything that will happen in the next two films.

So umm, yeah. That's City of Bones: the Movie. It may actually be worse than the book.Themes:

TV & Movies

Cassandra Clare

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http://ronanwills.wordpress.com/

at 14:01 on 2013-09-01Robert Sheehan is in this? I'm really hoping he's destined for better things, so this better not end up derailing his career.

Anyway, I was hoping to see a review of the movie on here so now I can satisfy my curiosity without actually watching it myself. I have to admit some of the clips they released actually looked fairly entertaining, but I guess they're not indicative of the movie itself.

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Dan H

at 15:22 on 2013-09-01I think it depends on what you mean by "indicative". There are certainly a lot of entertaining clips, it's just that there's nothing stringing them together. It's like the film is a two hour long trailer.

This is more or less exactly the same problem that I had with the book. There are quite a lot of cool scenes, but they just sort of happen one after the other with no real throughline or sense of arc.

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Fishing in the Mud

at 15:44 on 2013-09-01I'm kind of morbidly curious about what keeps the Clare train going. It looks like she's making money off her work and everything, but I have to wonder how she feels about the terrible reviews her work gets even from critics who like and praise popular writers like Whedon and Rowling. Something tells me the poor woman isn't just in this for the money.

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Arthur B

at 22:24 on 2013-09-01

Isn't this part of the usual weirdness with American media wanting to cast teenagers in sexually provocative roles but not, for obvious reasons, wanting to show actual (or even simulated) underage action on screen? I literally just started watching

Vampire Diaries

and half my viewing time so far has been spent yelling at the screen WHY ARE YOU STILL IN SCHOOL GET A JOB YOU SLACKERS

(Though to be fair, the fact that all the high schoolers are grown-ass adults makes the whole thing less creepy in some ways.)

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Cressida

at 22:55 on 2013-09-01A video review from The Nostalgia Chick; I'm curious what Ferretbrainers think...

http://blip.tv/nostalgia-chick/the-next-whatever-the-mortal-instruments-and-ya-adaptations-6635563

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Arthur B

at 23:19 on 2013-09-01My thoughts are "Woah, holy shit, a TGWTG reviewer who offers interesting insights and doesn't rely heavily on gimmicks, fake rage and wAcKy ChArAcTeRs, how rare is that?"

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Michal

at 00:56 on 2013-09-02I was actually about to post that video. Needless to say, I find her points to be very good ones.

My thoughts are "Woah, holy shit, a TGWTG reviewer who offers interesting insights and doesn't rely heavily on gimmicks, fake rage and wAcKy ChArAcTeRs, how rare is that?"

The good ones gather at Chez Apocalypse. Kyle Kallgren of

Brows Held High

is also very erudite and worth watching, especially his more recent videos. (Even better, the crossover between Nostalgia Chick and Brows Held High in which they review

Freddy Got Fingered

is truly something to behold)

I'm kind of morbidly curious about what keeps the Clare train going.

There are very few writers who are purely in it for the money, even the bad ones. I can assure you E.L. James probably enjoyed writing

Fifty Shades of Grey

very much and did not think "my

Twilight

fanfic will make millions!" But if there is a sentiment towards material gain behind Clare's work and writing, it can probably be summed up by

this enormous tour bus

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Fishing in the Mud

at 17:04 on 2013-09-02

I can assure you E.L. James probably enjoyed writing Fifty Shades of Grey very much and did not think "my Twilight fanfic will make millions!"

No doubt. But with Clare, I get the sense she doesn't want to write dreck and doesn't want people to think she writes dreck, but may not fully understand how to get better.

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http://wrongquestions.blogspot.com/

at 09:10 on 2013-09-03

with Clare, I get the sense she doesn't want to write dreck and doesn't want people to think she writes dreck

Obviously there's a non-trivial number of people who don't think that she writes dreck. She was a massively successful fanfic author, after all, to the extent of getting a professional publishing contract off her fanfic (and despite her books' debt to Harry Potter, unlike E.L. James she hasn't sold her fanfic; she had to write something from scratch and sell that). And I have seen other YA authors rave about her, though it's not clear to me how much of this is liking the books and how much liking her. Either way, she's got a community (and readers) who give her validation, and if the film of her book has been panned it will be pretty easy for her and her fans to take this as the result of adaptation decay rather than a reflection on the source material.

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Dan H

at 13:11 on 2013-09-03To be fair to Cla(i)re, I do think she's improved over the years. City of Bones was a gigantic incoherent mess. City of Ashes was a slightly less incoherent mess, City of Glass and Clockwork Angel were sort of okay. I mean they still had all of the annoying stuff that I'd expected from Clare's writing, but they actually told a story that made some modicum of sense.

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Alice

at 13:52 on 2013-09-03Either way, she's got a community (and readers) who give her validation, and if the film of her book has been panned it will be pretty easy for her and her fans to take this as the result of adaptation decay rather than a reflection on the source material.

This should be taken with a massive pinch of salt and a [citation needed], but the impression I got was that during the film production process, Clare had talked a lot about how closely involved with the film she was, but once it became clear the film was a flop, she backpedalled and began downplaying her involvement.

Then again, she's not in the business of making films, she's in the business of selling books, and she's pretty good at that.

And I have seen other YA authors rave about her, though it's not clear to me how much of this is liking the books and how much liking her.

Wasn't Maureen Johnson accused of being part of a YA Mafia (including Johnson and Clare) who were somehow all in cahoots and conspiring to get each other published? Because there happened to be a bunch of (aspiring/new) YA authors living in NYC at the same time who were friends and liked to hang out and write together, and happened to all get published to varying degrees of success/popularity? It all seemed a bit storm-in-a-teacup-ish to me, because, well, they were all in the same business, in the same city, and about the same age. And once two or three people become friends they're likely to make friends with each other's friends, especially if you're all in the same boat like that. And sure, they might have been able to help each other with getting agents and that sort of thing, but that's not quite the same thing as getting your friend published & on the bestseller list...

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http://alula-auburn.livejournal.com/

at 19:51 on 2013-09-03I've found the commercials amazingly bad, even for the parameters "that type of thing." Like, it's possible I've blocked it out, but I don't recall the Twilight ads looking so badly put together, in terms of picking out lines to quote or images to use.

Of course, I don't quite see how all the people involved in making a film didn't get the difference between something like Harry Potter or Twilight, which for better or worse penetrated the wider culture (even my extremely pop-cultural illiterate dad could identify Harry Potter as something with a school of wizards, and Twilight as vampires) and this--I think if you didn't have at least some sense of what the books were about the commercials would look even more pointless. (Which was kind of how I felt about the other YA fantasy flop? Beautiful Creatures? Southern accents and witches or something? I still don't know.)

I've not read the TMI (lol) books, but I did read the somewhat-annotated Draco trilogy in an overwrought, sleep-deprived unmedicated-for-a-chronic-pain-condition haze, and I can vaguely see how her style could be sort of compelling for the right sort of pretentious youthful mindset. (I didn't know about the plagiarism stuff then--I barely had a sense of fandom; I was a total naif.) But how it's held up to much more than that I don't know. I also don't know anything about TMI fandom--if the books have much if any staying power outside either that brief, pretentious adolescent window (which can almost be endearing in its own way) or the somewhat incestuous-seeming YA reviews. But there are adults, I guess, who find the ponderous self-absorption of the Twilight books (at least, that's the tone I saw in the quoted lines I read) to be good and profound writing.

That said, I find John Green tiresome and the bit of Maureen Johnson I read didn't do much for me. I don't know if I've had bad luck lately in my YA choices (I read Thirteen Reasons Why because I got it for free), but I've seen a lot more of that faux-deep heavy tone, which to me does not indicate a "maturing" of YA. (But I have personal reasons to be snippy about "literary" YA, so.)

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Alice

at 20:44 on 2013-09-04I've found the commercials amazingly bad, even for the parameters "that type of thing."

I don't know that I thought they were that unusually terrible (within the parameters of "that type of thing", at least), but I was confused by the number of English accents on display, particularly Jace's. Is he meant to be/sound English*, or is it just that Jamie Campbell Bower can't do a US accent?

*I don't remember him being pegged as English in the book, but I read that years ago and don't remember the details.

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Cammalot

at 21:42 on 2013-09-04One odd thing -- virtually every review I've read of this film has complained that Jayce is "a thousand years old" or similar and either doesn't act it, or shouldn't be macking on Clary at his age. Is that something that the film made particularly confusing? I don't recall him or any other forefront character being anything like an immortal in the book -- I mainly remember Isabelle being 14 and acting a bit precociously vampy.

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Dan H

at 19:26 on 2013-09-05@Alice

That confused me as well. I don't think I've ever *heard* him do an American accent, but the guy is an actor, surely he can learn? Is it that Valentine has an English accent because he's the villain, and Jace has an English accent because he was raised by Valentine? Or am I giving the film too much credit.

@Cammalot

One odd thing -- virtually every review I've read of this film has complained that Jayce is "a thousand years old" or similar and either doesn't act it, or shouldn't be macking on Clary at his age. Is that something that the film made particularly confusing?

*Everything* in the film is particularly confusing. The film makes no real attempt to explain anything, and there's one line where Jace says something about his people having been doing something "for a thousand years" and the way he says it I can see why somebody who wasn't familiar with Cla(i)re's work might think he was talking from personal experience.

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Fishing in the Mud

at 00:04 on 2013-09-06Fanon Draco must retain his English accent to remain fuckworthy. This point is not negotiable.

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Dan H

at 01:14 on 2013-09-06A tiny part of me is *incredibly* sad that they didn't cast Tom Felton as Jace.

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Cheriola

at 04:31 on 2013-09-06

While I agree that the wish to sexualise teenagers is probably part of the practise of

Dawson Casting

, the reasons for it are also based in labour laws. It's much less of a hassle to work with adults who can work a full day and don't still have to get high school lessons on the side / won't suddenly leave the franchise in order to start college. And you don't run into problems like the Harry Potter movies with teen actors who age faster than their characters or suddenly look a lot different than their characters are supposed to. (e.g. the actor playing Neville became quite handsome.) Plus, even if there is the occasional prodigy, most actors really do need drama school before being anywhere close to good enough to portray actual characters, instead of just being 'cute'.

Clearly Valentine was extraordinarily sexually precocious (even if we ignore the fact that Collins and Campbell-Bower are the best part of a decade older than the characters they portray, Rhys-Meyers' Valentine would still have to have started breeding at nineteen to have two seventeen-year-old kids).

Really? It's considered "precocious" to be a horny 19-year-old egomaniac who doesn't use condoms? Seems in keeping with the power-high invincibility complex and the lack of care for other people's problems that usually characterise a stereotypical villain like that. I mean, it's not him that would have to care the baby, unless he wants to.

Also, the scene with the ring is also pretty much the first time we learn the surnames of either Valentine or Fanon Draco.

I've skim-read the book article to know what you're even talking about, and... Wait, his surname is Morgenstern?! She took a character who was a blatant Hitler metaphor and made him ethnically Jewish? That... Wow.

One can only hope that she simply wanted a German name (because all Germans are Nazis...) and thought it would be cute to use one that doubled as a Lucifer reference (it means "morning star"), and that she simply didn't do any research on German name origins. [It's one of those names that the Jewish population of the Holy Roman Empire chose when they were forced to adopt surnames in the 18th century. Usually it's pretty-sounding compound words not refering to a profession - like Goldblum(e) ("golden flower"), Bernstein ("amber") or Lilienthal ("valley of lilies").]

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Fishing in the Mud

at 11:55 on 2013-09-06I think some reviewer pointed out that the "Morgenstern" thing is one more reason the film won't work for anyone old enough to remember

Rhoda

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Alice

at 14:09 on 2013-09-06I've skim-read the book article to know what you're even talking about, and... Wait, his surname is Morgenstern?! She took a character who was a blatant Hitler metaphor and made him ethnically Jewish? That... Wow.

Well, Cassandra Clare is herself Jewish, so I imagine she was aware of what she was doing when she introduced the Morgenstern reference (along with its cultural/historical baggage). :-)

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Cheriola

at 15:37 on 2013-09-06Really? Huh. Well, it's her right then, I suppose. I just wonder what went through her mind that she thought saying "Yeah, our guys could be just as bad, given half a chance" and feeding into 'zionists want world domination' myths was a good idea.

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Arthur B

at 15:43 on 2013-09-06Is it not possible for Clare to be both Jewish

and

ignorant of the name's history, so she plucked a name which sounded German to her out of thin air without researching it?

I suspect she was going for the "Morgenstern = Morning Star = Lucifer" deal rather than the "Morgenstern = Jew" angle, after all.

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Alice

at 16:14 on 2013-09-06Is it not possible for Clare to be both Jewish and ignorant of the name's history, so she plucked a name which sounded German to her out of thin air without researching it?

I suppose it's possible, but I'd honestly be very surprised if she didn't read Morgenstern as sounding Jewish, even if she didn't know about the historical origins of the name.

I suspect she was going for the "Morgenstern = Morning Star = Lucifer" deal rather than the "Morgenstern = Jew" angle, after all.

Yeah, same. I suppose the thing with Morgenstern is that it's an obvious enough reference that her readers are fairly likely to catch it (and feel all clever and intellectual), while still being a recognisable surname. (She could have used the Greek form if she'd wanted to be more pretentious than usual, but "(h)eosphoros" doesn't really lend itself to turning into a surname that's easily pronounceable in English.)

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Dan H

at 17:53 on 2013-09-06

Really? It's considered "precocious" to be a horny 19-year-old egomaniac who doesn't use condoms?

I was thinking more of the scenario in which he'd started having kids at eleven rather than nineteen (and I'm using "precocious" here in the sense of "premature" rather than "talented"). Although even nineteen doesn't *really* make sense if we look at the way that the history is played up - it's never suggested that Valentine got Jocelyn pregnant accidentally, or that he had kids unusually young.

Valentine is clearly *supposed* to be in his early forties at least, it's just that then he wouldn't be in the narrow window during which Hollywood decrees actors the right age to be sexy.

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Alasdair Czyrnyj

at 23:07 on 2013-09-11

oh my what a shame who could have forseen rhubarb rhubarb

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Fishing in the Mud

at 02:03 on 2013-09-12Yeah, if it hasn't managed to turn a profit in a good three weeks, I don't blame anyone for backing off. The standards for bestselling books are a whole lot lower than for movie blockbusters.

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Dan H

at 16:02 on 2013-09-12

The standards for bestselling books are a whole lot lower than for movie blockbusters.

I assume you mean "the revenues expected from bestselling books are a whole lot lower than the revenues expected from movie blockbusters". Because for most other expectations (plot, characterization, that sort of thing), bestselling books and blockbuster movies are pretty much on par.

Also: I've been poking around the forums on Rotten Tomatoes and some of the discussions are hilarious. I particularly like the people complaining about Jace having a British accent, and the other people saying "No, that makes sense. They grew up in Idris, which is in Europe, so they'd naturally have picked up British accents."

Because all European people have British accents, you guys.

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Cammalot

at 20:11 on 2013-09-12

Because all European people have British accents, you guys.

I've long enjoyed listening to the variety of accents with which Swedish people speak English. (This is a tangent, but not a joke. There was a little honest-to-goodness rivalry in one of my classes between the ones who'd learned with a North American/U.S. accent and the ones who'd learned received pronunciation [capitalize?] -- two of these were siblings on opposite sides -- and they all ganged up on the lone Norwegian.)

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Dan H

at 22:37 on 2013-09-12

This is a tangent, but not a joke.

Three Swedes walk into a schwa?

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Shim

at 23:10 on 2013-09-12

Three Swedes walk into a schwa?

...and say "əw!"?

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Fishing in the Mud

at 01:16 on 2013-09-13

I assume you mean "the revenues expected from bestselling books are a whole lot lower than the revenues expected from movie blockbusters".

Right, sorry about the word salad. Yesterday was a long day.

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http://elsurian.livejournal.com/

at 05:24 on 2013-09-13In the halcyon days of 2008

Jesus Christ, has this franchise really been around for 5 years?

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Cammalot

at 18:13 on 2013-09-13

Three Swedes walk into a schwa?

Hee.

I want to make some sort of vegetable-based pun now, but I got nothin'.

Jesus Christ, has this franchise really been around for 5 years?

And going on what, nine books? (Gotta admire the productivity.)

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Dan H

at 19:05 on 2013-09-13Is anybody else feeling really freaking old right about now?

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Cammalot

at 19:55 on 2013-09-13Yes!

(Although that's partly because at today's freelance gig, I just met a coworker who was born my first year of college.)

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Dan H

at 21:58 on 2013-09-13Ouch.

I'm particularly looking forward to our next couple of GCSE intakes, which will be the point at which I start working with people who were born in the 21st century.

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Fishing in the Mud

at 00:44 on 2013-09-14Yeah, I just found out half the people I report to directly at work are younger than I am.

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#Ferretbrain #Cassandra Clare #The Mortal Instruments #Axis of Awful #Dan H

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neverisalongtime-ja-blog · 6 years

Text

Anastasia’s Interview!

I already told you all on Anastacia’s IG profile that this week things are going to be a little bit different. Instead of a full chapter I used my journalist skills to write an interview, the one we’ve been talking about on past chapters.

I thought it was a fun idea and many of you don’t know that I’m actually a journalist so it was a great oportunity for my to put my knowledge to the test.

I hope you all like it and don’t forget to give feedback!

Thank you all for reading this crazy thing that I’m writing!

“We want to step out of the Chili Peppers’ shadow”

A new album and the same old attitude give Dead Curse all the elements to finally reach the long way to the top of rock and roll

The music world these days is weird. It’s constantly changing and many – too many – styles adjoin at the same time. You have a huge variety to choose. Some musicians play safe finding a beat that works for them and stick to it forever, others are not afraid of change and keep renewing their sounds from time to time. I’m about to have a conversation with a musician that belongs to the second group, a girl who is always testing new ways to show her talent and creating new melodies. Maybe that’s the reason she is one of the most valued producers in the last 10 years, being responsible of creating massive hits for artists like Katy Perry, Justin Bieber, Imagine Dragons and even pop queens like Britney Spears and Madonna.

You would have thought that she takes the stage with over elaborated choreographies, but her personal music style is far from that. She leads a rock band, quite a famous one, a very original group that mixes sweet melodies with powerful lyrics and helps bring back the sensuality of old rock and roll acts.

She definitely exudes a sexy vibe. She takes a seat in front of me wearing a sports bra with the phrase “Not your babe” in the front and high-waisted leggings. You could think she’s coming right from the gym but her face tells a different story, no makeup and a smile after a yawn show her tiredness, “Sorry, I haven’t had a good night’s sleep in a while”, she says, her big blue eyes shine and everybody in the press room at the Meadows Festival turn their heads to her. I’m in the presence of a star.

It’s been a wild year…

“Tell me about it!” She laughs. “We’ve been doing a lot of things and this tour took forever”.

But I imagine it must’ve been fun.

“Oh it was. It definitely was. We are close to the end now and I’m gonna miss everyone, but we are ready to take the lead, do our own thing now and kind of step out of the Chili Peppers’ shadow”

The Chili Peppers are big shoes to fill.

“Yeah, but we are not trying to fill them. They are who they are and we are a completely different band”.

How did this happen? Who’s idea was it of touring together?

“I think it was Anthony’s. Last year we did our usual festival tour, we played on some of the same festivals and I have known Anthony, Flea and Chad practically since I moved to Los Angeles back when I was 12. Anthony was my sister Barbara’s neighbor – He still is – and they are very close friends, so, you know, they were always together and hanging out at our place and they are like family to me. I’ve known Josh for a long time too, almost seven years now so there was a precedent there for sure. We started hanging out – they were on the finishing stages of planning their own world tour, and it was probably Anthony the one that had the idea to put us as an opening act. I was shocked.”

Why?

“Because our styles are very different, our audiences couldn’t be any more different so I thought it was a crazy idea but, at the same time, it was an incredible opportunity for us to gain new fans.”

And you did.

“Yeah, it feels really good to know that although they don’t attend the shows to see our band, their fans still support us. At first we were just going to do the Europe leg, but people started to request us in other places. That was a great feeling.”

But here you are, tired of touring.

“Not like that,” she laughs again. “It’s just that the schedule is crazy. Two weeks on, two weeks off. We should do all the dates together and finish this shit in six months, you know? The say that it’s because they want to spend more time with their families but, if we shortened this huge amount of dates they would all have even more time to spend with their children. You start touring for two weeks, you get used to that tour routine but then you have to back home… you get used to your home routine and then you have to go back to tour, again and again, and you don’t know what to do. My sleeping schedule is fucked.”

You would think that touring with the Chili Peppers is a wild experience.

“But it’s not, at all! I imagined Flea would be running around naked at every venue, but they all act like responsible adults now. They are grounded men that demand veggies and a variety of teas in their dressing rooms; they are quite boring to be honest. Chad’s the man for us in the other hand; he was always up for a drink every day off. Overall, it has been more like a religious experience, they have taught us a lot about this side of the music business and we will be forever grateful for that.“

You have a new album that will be released soon and you have said before that it’s a new age for Dead Curse.

“I’m so happy and proud of this record. It’s totally different from everything we have done before and is heavily influenced by this whole touring experience. We never really planned to put out another record so soon. We wanted to finish the tour, get some rest and then go back to the studio but we, as a band, were having such an inspirational rush and making all this amazing songs that we didn’t want to put it on hold, we wanted everybody to hear the new material.”

What makes it different from your other work?

“Musically, it’s a ground we haven’t covered before. It’s an album that was made to be played live, it has a big stadium anthem vibe, and at the same time it’s the perfect record to blast on your car or in your bedroom. It’s powerful, it’s pure rock… We have never sounded as tight as a band before. We have finally found a way to highlight each one of our talents. Nick plays incredible guitar solos, Mandy came up with the catchiest bass lines and at the same time Eric has never played those drums as hard as he did on this album. I’m proud; I think we reached the place we always wanted to be at as a band. We always, well… I always liked to adorn our melodies with a lot of extra instruments like trumpets, harps, violins, mostly because I started as a classical musician and I thought that was what made us different from the rest, but in this one we ditched all of that. We kind of started that in our last album, but here it’s just us with our instruments; I may have included some piano notes or maybe a synthesizer or two, but it’s mostly us showing what we can do with the basics”.

The recording process was different too.

“Yes, because we would usually enter the studio and start from zero there, but in this case we were making songs since the beginning of the year while we were touring, we would record in bathrooms in hotel rooms, and then we had some free time so we decided to enter the studio just to organize what we already had. We kind of recorded this album live because we would play all the instruments in one take and then I would add the vocals, while before, we used to make each sound separately. We also went out of our comfort zone and recorded the album in the desert. We did some takes in an amazing place near Joshua Tree called Rancho de Luna, and we also recorded at the Battle Born Studios in Las Vegas. So all of that influenced the sound vibe for this record.”

Why Las Vegas?

“I went to Las Vegas for a while because it’s this big show city and I wanted to translate that vibe into the album. I wanted it to be a big show album.”

Lyrically, is it different?

“Yeah. The last album we made was sort of a cathartic experience for me. I turned the pen to my experience and it was a whole album about me. This time I went back to diversity and I shared my experiences, but I wrote about Mandy’s, Nick’s, and Eric’s experiences as well, and even experiences of some dude we met in Russia, you know? It’s different and I’m glad that I went back to that. I don’t really like to write about me and that made the last album so hard to make, so I’m more relaxed this time because it doesn’t feel like my album but a band’s album.”

Why did you pick Josh Klinghoffer to produce the album?

“I know how much Josh likes to be in a studio. We developed a big friendship over this tour and he was dying to do something different than the Peppers at that point, so we thought he was perfect for the job. It was a challenge for him too, because he wasn’t comfortable with the kind of music we wanted to project, and although the original plan was to produce the record on our own, we realized that we needed an outsider’s opinion. Josh is a close friend and someone we trust with our guts. He has an amazing music taste and he brought all these British band influences that can be heard on some songs. Each member of the band, as individuals, has very different tastes in music: Nick is more punk, Mandy is all about what’s new and the R&B scene, Eric likes the old rock and roll, I’m a fan of soft rock melodies so we definitely needed someone that glued all of that together, and that person was Josh.”

With all those different styles you may think yours is a tough band to be part of.

“We are so different from each other. In the beginning, many people thought that we weren’t gonna make it. The age difference plays an important role too, but we managed to overcome it and the idea of doing what we love and expressing ourselves through music is what moves us. We know how lucky we are everyday for being able to do what we love and making a living out of it. Many fail on the way but we are keeping strong, even with our differences.”

Don’t you want to kill each other all of the time?

“Oh! Every day” She laughs.

Does it bother you when people say the success of Dead Curse is attached to your last name?

“It used to bother me, but not anymore. I came to terms with it. I won’t lie to you, I do think that being Nick Truman’s daughter helped us gain notoriety in a very short time, but if it wasn’t for our talent and passion for what we do we wouldn’t have come this far.”

In the past, you’ve said that being in this business while suffering from chronic depression could lead to suicide. Do you still think so?

“Yeah, every day. But luckily, I have an amazing support group around me that helps me when I’m down.”

How have you coped with such a long tour?

“Surprisingly, I haven’t had a panic attack or a full-on depression episode during this tour. I’m in my element, doing what I love and that helps a lot. I know it sounds cheesy but without music I wouldn’t be here today. I was having a lot of trouble keeping myself afloat back when I was 14, and entering a studio and starting to make music for such a big part of my life gave me the push and have a purpose to wake up every morning.”

Some can’t do that. Lady Gaga just canceled her tour because of her health issues.

“Mental issues, they aren’t just issues. I love what Lady Gaga is doing, erasing the stigma from mental illness. She is strong and we all need time to heal to give the audience the best version of ourselves.”

Do you give yourself to your audience? Do you care what other people think of your music or not, as long as you are happy with it?

“I think when you have talent and passion and you are so sure of the way you express yourself, it translates into what you offer to the public and they embrace things well done. I think that saying ‘I don’t give a shit about what other people think’ is such a strong statement. I just like to express myself, not thinking if people are going to like it or not, so… yeah, in a way I just don’t give a fuck” She laughs.

Dead Curse has been cataloged as a festival band, are you okay with that? Was that the road you all wanted to take?

“When we started the band we never had any goal of being as a certain thing, we just wanted to play music and to express ourselves through it. Everything that happened from there was organically done. I love to play at festivals. First you get to play to such huge crowds, you also get to see friends otherwise would never encounter and you get to discover new bands and artists, that is something I love to do. Festivals are all fun and games. We just had the best experience ever headlining Glastonbury which was something that never in a million years I would have thought we’d do.”

How did that feel? Do you think you reached a peak as a band after that?

“It’s all downhill from here”, She laughs. “As I told you, we never had any goals as a band to do things like that, but Glastonbury was definitely a dream come true for me. I attended so many editions of the festival and I always found myself watching a certain band play and thinking ‘One day it’s gonna be us up there’ so making that dream a reality stills feels so surreal. I still can’t believe we did that. I cried the day before, I cried during the set and I’m still crying today.”

Now let’s talk about style.

“My favorite subject besides music.”

You have a quite unique fashion sense with your stage outfits. How do you manage not to repeat a single one with so many shows?

She laughs “Anthony was always joking about that. About the fact that we don’t repeat outfits on stage while they are always wearing the same, but I don’t know, fashion sense is a extension of this express-yourself thing. I grew up in a very fashionable environment with my mother being a model and my sister Barbara being a huge clothes lover. I kind of adopted that taste for looking my best. It doesn’t happen all the time, look at me now, I’m a mess,” She laughs, “But with time, I’ve learned to wear what makes me feel comfortable. I ditched the heels long time ago unless I’m just performing one song. I don’t know how to answer to your question… if I like it I’m gonna wear it.”

What do you do with your stage outfits afterwards? Because I can’t see you doing grocery shopping in thigh-high Union Jack boots, encrusted with Swarovski crystals.

“You might be surprised! I have a room just for my stage outfits at home. It’s crazy and totally unnecessary.”

What’s the next step for Dead Curse? What can we expect?

We are going to release our record. ‘Live Action’ is going to be available on October 31, my favorite day of the year. We are going to be releasing our first single with the video next week, it’s called ‘Flesh and Bones’ and we’ll probably do a couple of promotional shows and maybe have our own headlining tour next year.

What’s the video about?

“Well, ‘Flesh and Bones’ is a powerful song about owning yourself, having confidence in your own skin and being able to kick any ass that gets on your way, so we wanted to take that and show it with the immigration issues in this country, showing that no matter where you come from you can have the life you’ve dreamed about here.”

Getting political…

“We have never gotten political before, but with everything that’s happening in this crazy country right now you must step out and have a voice.”

What are you going to do now? How do you see yourself in five years?

“I’m gonna get myself a husband!” She laughs.

“Live action” the new studio album by Dead Curse is out on October 31 and available for pre-sale on October 7.

#Josh Klinghoffer #fanfic #fanfiction #josh klinghoffer fanfiction #josh klinghoffer fanfic #Anastasia Truman #Interview #Music #never is a long time #JoshAn

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barbecuedphoenix · 7 years

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Hello! I just need to say I LOVE your writing, omg I read and re-read your stuff AT LEAST once a week, seriously, you're a genius *kisses your face*. This is not really a request, just an IDEA for you to think about, but have you thought of how would be the first time Nevra drank Guardienne's blood? Maybe during sex, or before their first time...? I'm just curious to know what you think of his drinking habits if he were in a relationship with her.

*She reaches forward togently cup your cheek, her thumb tracing feather-light crescents around thepoint of your cheekbone that sends sparks dancing, waves of fire rolling across your skin withevery sly, knowing stroke*

You flatter me too much,my dear. ;)

Ahem. To answer your question, Anon., I do have a few ideas on what blood-feedingentails for Nevra. Because it’s a pretty fascinating subject for an aspiringbiologist. And you can never skip out on blood-feeding with a vampire beau. ;)

But first, I’ll have toseparate what’s implied in canon with, well, my headcanon. Brace yourself for adouble-serving of analysis and imagination. Plus science. Because there’salways science involved when talking about vampires. ^_^

Warning: Not NSFW… but it still has a lot of innuendo. Don’t try reading thisout-loud if you’re babysitting. Not even if the kid in question likes Twilight.

What does blood-drinking mean to him? (CanonAnalysis)

Seeing that Nevra is quick to offer a bite (as a joke or agenuine pick-up line) in several episodes, and given that he does drink fromladies he isn’t dating (i.e. that awkward moment in Episode 10), my impressionis that blood-drinking is more a casual activity for Nevra than a seriouscommunion.

The impetus also seems to be more sexual than nutritive: hedefinitely seems to prefer drinking from young ladies, instead of—shall wesay—more robust sources of blood plasma. Like young men of Valkyon’s size. (Sorry,fans. But that’s why we have headcanons.) Furthermore, Nevra has alreadymentioned in Episode 8 that it’s ‘fun’, which lends more credence to him seeingblood-drinking as a form of foreplay.

He’s clearly unabashed about his appetite for blood, from theblasé way he shrugs off criticism, jokes, and put-downs in Episodes 10, 4, and 8 respectively. This can be due to his supreme confidence in himself… and/or his knowledge of how vampires are walkingsexual fantasies in human literature (see episode 6). But from the number ofdinner/pantry jokes he makes, I’m willing believe that– on some level– Nevrabelieves blood-drinking increases his mystique among non-vampires. Sorry,buddy… but vampires are still a niche fad in this world

It’s unknown how necessary blood-drinking is to his survival,or what benefits it gives him. But it definitely isn’t the sole component ofhis diet: Nevra can consume regularfood (see episode 8), and is partial towards certain treats like red wine andthe oh-so-appropriate blue steaks (i.e. extremely raw steaks). Personally, Isupport the idea of him having a varied, omnivorous diet (sacrilege for vampirefans, I know) because blood in itself—per volume—is not nutritious at all:mainly composed of water, protein, and salt, with some iron and trace lipidsfrom red blood cells, and a very light sprinkling of sugars and importantminerals dissolved throughout. In fact, all full-time sanguivores—i.e.blood-drinkers—in nature are on the tiny side by necessity, and still need toconsume huge quantities of blood relative to their body weight just to avoidstarvation; vampire bats, for instance, need to drink half their body weight inblood per meal. So biologically-speaking, it’s just more feasible for Nevra toeat solid meat and other concentrated sources of carbohydrates, fats, vitamins,etc. (Besides… can you imagine how many people each day have to ‘donate’ forhis most basic rations if blood is all he consumes? Between him and Karenn,they’ll drain El dry. That won’t look good for the Guard. >_>)

Consent is necessary in Nevra’s book (see Episode 10), and heaccepts refusals (and borderline insults) with aplomb. So my guess is thatblood-drinking is still considered an intimate act, despite Nevra’s ‘swinger’approach to it. And that he’s aware it isn’t the most mainstream/popular/politesexual kink in El (check Ezarel’s ire in Episode 10 on him ‘chewing on’ one ofhis alchemists). That doesn’t mean he won’t stop trying though…

Blood doesn’t turn him on every single time. In fact, Nevra compartmentalizeshis reactions to it depending on the situation. For instance, if blood isspilled as a field injury, he jumps straight into Shadow Dad! Mode (see episode6), and all sexy/food-related thoughts are forgotten. This ability to switchmindsets on a dime indicates excellent self-control… and could be an adaptationto working with non-vampires who may get uneasy at spilling blood in front ofhim. Nevra even makes a joke in episode 8 (if you take him to the kitchen) thathe’s offended that the MC thinks of him as a ‘bloodthirsty beast’.

The effects of blood-drinking? (Canon Analysis)

According to one discussion in Episode 10, you can ‘turn’ into a vampire, but having avampire feed from you isn’t what causes it (at least, not on its own). So untilmore information comes to light, blood-drinking mostly seems like a funindulgence for Nevra, with no real long term consequences.

Nevra is implied to have the capacity to drink quite a bit of blood day after day, ifValkyon’s deadpan remark in Episode 4 is anything to go by. So anemia and even shock would be the most common health risks involved inblood-drinking besides infection (unsurprisingly). How much Nevra can drink ina single sitting is still up to debate, but he does have his principles andisn’t likely to drain partners to the point of shock. How else did he gainsuch a wide net of… voluntary donors?

His vampiric skills involved withblood-drinking? (Headcanon)

Like allvampires, he’s gifted with an extremely nimble tongue… which he uses to drink andpurr like a cat, never wasting a drop of blood and being finicky in lickinghis lips and fingers clean. And his partner’s skin, of course. Wheneverpossible, Nevra also avoids staining the bedsheets and his or his partner’sclothes; only amateurs are thatsloppy.

His nose isn’tjust good for sniffing out blood and fear from a quarter-mile away: theskin on the underside of his nose is highly thermosensitive (just like avampire bat), which allows him track rich arteries under the skin forprecision-bites, even in pitch darkness. His lips and fingertips too are packedwith biological thermo-sensors (not quite like a vampire bat). You cancompletely blindfold him, and he stillwon’t miss your carotid artery.

Good news: his bites don’t hurt. This is because the razor-sharppoints of his fangs are the envy of swordsmiths and surgeons. Not to mentionthat they’re coated in a natural anesthetic compound found in his saliva. (Likevampire bats; how else do they sneak up on their prey and dine on them for half-an-hourwithout waking them up?) At most, if he’s really eager and/or careless thatnight, you’ll feel two tiny pricks where his mouth meets your skin. Rightbefore he distracts you with all the other things he’s doing.

The bad news: there are also natural anticoagulants in hissaliva that prevent blood from clotting easily. (How else can his people get a long drink?) So the only way to staunch thebleeding from his bite is to clean and bandage the wound, maybe tie atourniquet if it’s a deep one, then wait it out. Fortunately, he also offers thisservice as a courtesy.

Nevra has an uncanny way of estimating his partner’s bodyweight, and then approximating how much blood he can afford to drink from them withoutrisking shock. Sans instruments. Just try lying about your weight to him. Hehas an excellent eye for volumetric amounts and measurements, honed byexperience.

His sense oftaste is actually very poor—an adaptation among vampires to cope with theirpeculiar drink of choice–, so the bracing iron taste of fresh blood doesn’tmake a difference to him. As do many foods, though he won’t admit this toothers. (So if there’s any poison in his food or drink, he has to do his bestto sniff them out instead. And bet on his robust immune system to buy him enoughtime to reach his cache of antidotes.)

He has abody built for the bedroom, uh, I mean blood consumption: his liver cancope with very high concentrations of iron, and the lining of his stomachabsorbs excess water rapidly. His immune system also lends some credence to thelegends of ‘immortal’ vampires: allowing him to resist most common diseases,and rally quickly from pathogens in infected blood.

How does he generally treat his partners whendrinking from them? (Headcanon)

I see blood-drinking as a fringe kink, fetish, and longtime socialpractice that Nevra’s people have. It combines food-play with sex, formalizesan intimate bond between individuals, and is even used as a form oftreatment in traditional medicine. (Why pointed fangs and an appetite for bloodbecame hereditary traits suggests some strong evolutionary benefits…but that’s for another day.) But Nevra, being a modern young vampire, prefersto apply blood-drinking as a form of tasty foreplay, to be carried outinside or outside the bedroom, with casual or serious partners. Drinking during sex though is what automatically flipshis high-voltage switch and unleashes the fireworks. From that point, it’s aone-way ticket to a wild night. Expect soreness and a tactical scarf the nextmorning.

The mood to drink is never far from his mind once he startsgetting cozy with his partner, and Nevra is never shy about suggesting itthrough heavy innuendo, slow kisses that nibble lightly at their inner wrist orneck, or merely smiling and posing a two-word question that leaves no doubt onwhat he wants. Still, winning consent is a matter of honor for him, and henever tries to surprise partners with a bite, even if he has fed from them before.If they’re not keen on the idea at the moment, he may pout and try to cajolethem, but will ultimately accept their refusal.

Location is key: some arteries are in patently sexier placesthan others. Drinking from the wrist is the most chaste by far, whereasdrinking from the neck is getting pretty heavy (but still possible to dooutside the bedroom). And drinking from the inside of the thigh is savedstrictly for behind closed doors. Depending on Nevra’s mood, the state ofhis partner’s skin at that location (some places might still be healing fromprior bites), and/or the need to look halfway decent in public, he’ll switchbetween different areas.

No matter his partner’s species, Nevra aims to keepblood-drinking safe, health-wise, as a point of pride and courtesy. (He of allpeople knows the risks involved with infection, blood-transmitted diseases,tissue scarring, anemia, and shock from blood loss.) So he’ll limit himself ifhis partner is on the petite side, and always spaces out feedings until they’rein optimal health again. And he’ll never so much as nip at his partner if they’rerecovering from an injury, are sick, or are susceptible to the health risksinvolved in opening a vein. Hearing that his partner consulted a doctor right aftertheir bedroom shenanigans will embarrass Nevra to no end. He is looking after them, he swears!

He never goes anywhere without keeping one black silkhandkerchief in his pocket, just large enough to wrap around a neck or sveltethigh that’s been offered to him. Staunching the bleeding and covering up themarks of his teeth is what he considers his obligation, and he’ll be happy tolet partners keep the handkerchief afterwards; he’s a gentleman, after all.As a result, Nevra is on first-name basis with city tailors, mercers, andlaunderers from all the silk handkerchiefs he orders and washes—in bulk– everyfew months. Which he then keeps folded in one drawer of his bedside table. Forconvenient access.

Contrary to expectations, Nevra is automatically turned-offif partners tease him by flaunting fresh papercuts and knife-nicks, evenaccidental. In his book, it’s a crass way to snag his attention (not to mentionidiotic, from the infections they’re risking), so he’ll at most lecture themand bandage those cuts straightaway. Part of the allure in blood lies in itsmystery after all, flowing secret under the skin until he makes the firstpierce. He’s a bloodthirsty beast only some nights in the bedroom, thank you.

How does he behave if drinking from theGuardian for the first time? (Headcanon)

For all hisjokes, Nevra is very aware that this is a gesture of trust, especiallyfrom a non-vampire and a novice who isn’t fully familiar with the practice. Sohe makes a point to be reassuring, aiming to keep the experience comfortable,sensual, and enjoyable for both parties (even if he’s the only one who’ll befeeding). Because if he likes them enough… he’ll want them to return to offerhim a ‘second serving’.

A privatelocation is really all he needs because this is the closest thing to aquickie that he can offer. But if there’s someone he’s looking to impress,he’ll take them straight to his room (prepped beforehand) where they can both befully comfortable, and he’ll be able to wash clean the bites. And where they’ll be free to indulge themselves a little more, if there’s time…

As with allpartners, he is very sensual whenfeeding, clasping the Guardian full against him and letting his hands wander. Teasingtheir skin first with kisses that grow increasingly less chaste, warming up hispartner in his arms while he tests out the best places to make an ideal bite. Fora first-timer, he’ll double this ‘warm up’ period until he’s absolutely surethat his partner is comfortable. And as turned-on as he is.

Just like anydentist, surgeon, or physician armed with a needle, Nevra never warns partnerswhen it’s actually time for him to make that bite: anticipation will only makethem anxious (and kill the mood). So the Guardian will still be lolling aroundin his arms and under the prints of his mouth, oblivious to what’s happening, until they suddenly feel that warm welling of their blood right where his mouthis fused determinedly against their skin. And when they freeze up, he’ll workto reassure them with his hands, his embrace, the pressure of his lips, and oneor two tactical noises of satisfaction, encouraging them (wordlessly) to relaxand enjoy the feel of his body against theirs. And not think too hard aboutthis moment.

For thisoccasion, he’ll keep the feeding light and neat, drinking from wrist or neckonly. After he staunches the bleeding with his ever-ready handkerchief, he’llpress a teasing kiss against the fabric right where his bite is, determined tomake the Guardian blush. And he’ll insist that they ‘hold onto thehandkerchief’, to not worry about returning it to him; it’s a standard gestureof magnanimity on his part, but for a first-timer, it’s also a way to give thema memento of this moment. To let them mull over what they did enjoy, andhopefully, return to him for a reprise…

If theGuardian is particularly concerned, he’ll oblige to answer what questions they have about health and sanitary concerns… as well as rumors they mighthave heard about vampires. But frankly, only the last part is fun for Nevra;giving medical explanations is always a tedious chore for him, so what answershe does offer are kept simple and reassuring. All they really need to know isthat he knows what he’s doing; they can trust him. He’s been doing this fora long while.

How does he treat longtime partners whom hedrinks from? (Headcanon)

Although infamousknown for biting casually, Nevra will restrict himself to drinking only fromhis partner if seriously involved with them. Feeding from others at this pointis akin to getting frisky with them, and thus putting one foot on the line ofinfidelity. For all his bad jokes and playboy reputation, Nevra’spartner is his very first preference for sharing such an intimate moment. Andif they’re really not in the mood to be nibbled at, he feels put-out.

They’ll start receiving naughty gifts… and not the expected type either. He’ll buythem scarves. Ascots. Satin opera gloves. Plus a healthy supply of dark silkhandkerchiefs for them to keep in their room, chokers and thigh garters made ofsatin or black lace, and velvet wrist corsages each pinned with a singleblood-red rose. All to cover up the bite-marks he left on their skin as theyheal… and remind him pleasantly of ‘what he did’ at their last encounterwhenever he sees them. When they’re alone, Nevra likes to slip these tacticalgifts an inch or two lower just to peek at, stroke, or kiss the marks he left behindthe other night. What a horny bastard.

He’ll be more open to gentle, affectionate blood-feedings.And if he’s having a rotten day, and his partner is the one who offers him a drink,his mood is guaranteed to shoot up by several notches. For once, he won’t dropsly suggestions to continue to the bedroom immediately, instead being perfectlyhappy to cuddle or spoon them in silence wherever they are. A blood-feeding maybe a sexually-charged gesture, but it can become an act of solace and caring ifoffered by a partner he trusts. One he won’t forget for a while.

He certainly won’t say no to his partner bitinghim back, even if their teeth are flatter and can’t (or won’t) pierce his skin; it’s the sensation that counts. And he himself is very sensitive around the crook of his neck. Still, Nevra prefersto do most of the biting—to draw blood or simply to tease. He has the right teeth, and knows how to be the boss use them for maximal mutual pleasure.

For a darker take on how Nevra might react to blood spilled on the battlefield, check out this pure headcanon.

#reader response #character analysis #headcanon #Eldarya #Nevra

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fallenloverecords · 6 years

Text

Interview: Gentle Brontosaurus

Hi lovers! Here at Fallen Love headquarters we periodically interview people that we adore in order to shine a spotlight on our wonderful pop planet. We post all those interviews right here for your education and enjoyment.

Gentle Brontosaurus are an indiepop band from Madison, Wisconsin, USA. They are Huan-Hua Chye (ukulele & keyboard), Nick Davies (keyboard & trumpet), Cal Lamore (guitar), Paul Marcou (drums), and Anneliese Valdes (bass). Fallen Love head Harley interviewed the band through a computer. Fallen Love Records: How did Gentle Brontosaurus begin? Huan-Hua: Get ready for some band lineage in excruciating detail:

Nick and I used to be in a band called TL;DR that broke up after a couple of band members moved away, so we decided to start a new band.

We knew Paul and Jon from having played with their old band, Baristacide, and we recruited Michael to play bass for us through Craigslist.

Eventually Jon decided it was time to part ways with us and we asked Cal to play guitar. Nick and I had met Cal through a songwriting website called FAWM, February Album Writing Month.

Last year Michael moved to Milwaukee and decided to leave the band so we recruited Anneliese, whom I had met via a community ukulele club called MAUI and who had filled in on bass for us a while back for a Buffy The Vampire Slayer Musical Episode cover show we did with our friends Croaker.

And here is a curated selection of a few of our other related current or recent projects you might want to check out - we are busy individuals: Square Bombs (Paul & Jon) The Werewolverine (Anneliese) The Ferns or C. H. Lamore solo (Cal) Vowl Sounds, Red Tape Diaries (Huan-Hua) Spiral Island (Nick)

FLR: All five of you sing. Was that something planned on from the early stages or did it just discover itself? HH: We used to only have three vocalists (max one lead and one backing at any given time) but decided that seven instruments and three vocals between five people wasn't making the sound guys' lives hard enough (not to mention ours) so we added some more. It has definitely been a voyage of self-discovery. I think we'll try to streamline a bit more in the future, though, since venues almost never have enough mics. FLR: Based on your social media some people might expect you to be a comedy or novelty band. Are new listeners ever caught off-guard? Nick: Is this regarding the Facebook account where we share dinosaur memes or the Twitter account where we post things like Baha Men trivia? Early on I had our genre listed as "brony rock" on Facebook just as a joke and it’s come back up occasionally. Like the time Jimmy K, a local radio personality, had both us and The Ferns (Cal's previous band) on an episode of his show and he got his intro cards mixed up and called The Ferns "brawny rock." HH: Also we got invited to put a song on an actual brony rock compilation, which was unfortunately vetoed by other band members. Anyway I aim to keep expectations at rock bottom so that new listeners can only be pleasantly surprised when we turn out to be (hopefully) honest and charming and good. I don't usually aim for funny when I'm writing songs (although sometimes it ends up there) but I usually aim to be entertaining on social media. (I usually man the Facebook account and Nick the Twitter account). I feel it's the least I can do. FLR: Who writes the lyrics? Each song carries a real depth, like a full short story condensed into four minutes. HH: Nick and I are about 50/50 on songwriting. On the first album our old guitarist wrote one and our old bassist wrote one but I think on the new album it's more or less evenly divided between me and Nick as far as lyrics go. I think the two of us share a love for possibly ill-advised wordiness and allusions so sometimes people have been surprised to find out who wrote which songs. I wrote poetry for years before ever turning to lyrics and a few songs, like "Rabbit Test", are remnants of poems or stories or concepts I could never quite make work on the written page. N: I don't intend to give every song a narrative but in addition to FAWM in February I participate in NaNoWriMo in November. Maybe some of that bleeds over into songwriting. Storytelling does provide a way to address topics without being tied to your own perspective. I'd be kind of uncomfortable writing songs all about Nick and how Nick feels right now, especially if we might decide to have someone else in the band sing it. HH: I, on the other hand, love writing songs all about HH and how HH feels right now. Maybe this is why we have so many songs about food.

FLR: Your debut album, Names Of Things And What They Do, came out in November 2015. What was the process to get there and how has the path shifted since then? HH: That album was very DIY like our new one will be. We recorded it over a period of months in our old practice space and our old guitarist Jon mixed it. Similar approach this time around, all home recordings. It's going to be an interesting mix as some of these songs, like "Kevin Bacon", we've played for years (it almost made it onto the first album) and others, like "A Shot" or "For Emma, Forever Ago", we'd only been playing for a few weeks and had never played live before starting to record. So for those newer songs we're kind of figuring out arrangements and parts as part of the recording process. We recorded all the drums and scratch tracks live, the way we're used to playing, and are now going along and re-recording individual parts to replace the scratch versions. One of the things that's pretty interesting about our piecemeal recording process is that we often can't hear/process the cool things everyone else is doing since we are distracted at the time with our own performances. Sound balance is also difficult to get right live with five people,so there have been a lot of moments where, once you're listening to a clear recording, you go "Oh, I had no idea you had this awesome part happening here." It makes you appreciate everyone and their contributions and musicianship just that much more. FLR: Do you think dinosaurs had feathers or scales? Anneliese: Yes, and some had neither. FLR: Why hasn't Netflix rebooted popular '90s sitcom Dinosaurs yet? A: This might be a question for the Jim Henson Workshop. Fun fact: Kevin Clash, who's the voice of Elmo, was also the voice of Baby Sinclair. And Jessica Walter (of Arrested Development) was the voice of the mother. HH: I'm sure it's on the horizon since we are apparently officially in the midst of a serious worldwide franchise shortage. I will officially volunteer us to provide the soundtrack for the inevitable gritty, sexy reboot. (I mean have you seen Riverdale, the gritty, sexy Archie reboot? Anything is possible.) The theme song will be called "Nobody's Baby" and will be in the style of Julee Cruise and everyone will wear black leather jackets and white undershirts in a very sexy James Dean kind of way. Also, if you don't have a physical copy of our album, Baby Sinclair fans should check out the art on the inner sleeve. FLR: Do you ever get tired of answering dinosaur questions? Will your choice of band name haunt you for the rest of time? HH: No and no. Since we are from the Land Before Time I'm not totally sure yet what this "time" thing is but I'm sure I'll figure it out one of these days. (Sorry to the random person on Tumblr I stole that joke from.)

FLR: What's your earliest musical memory? N: The first songs I wrote were entirely MIDI, written in a sheet music editor. Sadly they were lost forever in the mp3.com buyout of 2001. I thought I had a cassette copy but I went back to my parents' house in D.C. this past summer and the cassette is gone too. After that era I started recording angsty stuff with a beat-up acoustic guitar and some ill-conceived "rapping." Unfortunately there are surviving copies of that. A: Dancing around the living room to my dad's old boogie-woogie records when I was three or four. HH: They gave us recorders in grade school because the only thing better than one five year-old playing the recorder is fifteen of them all at once so I clearly recall making some really avant-garde noise rock as part of my early musical education. Also one of our music teachers was a grad student at the UC Berkeley School of Music and wrote an opera called The Nightingale that he made us learn, like a troupe of performing opera monkeys. FLR: What song have you listened to the most this year? HH: I went to look at my Spotify stats and some of my top tracks in recent months have been: Frankie Cosmos- "Fool", Big Thief - "Masterpiece", X - "The World's A Mess, It's In My Kiss", Eux Autres - "Other Girls", and Jens Lekman - "To Know Your Mission." N: I'm also enjoying the new Jens Lekman album! Crying's Beyond The Fleeting Gales has been the album that has hardly left my car stereo this year. FLR: What's one question you've never been asked in an interview that you would love to be asked someday? HH: You are standing in front of two doors. Behind one lies immeasurable riches, behind the other lies certain death. There are two guards guarding the doors, one sworn to always lie and one sworn to always tell the truth, but you don't know which is which. What is the best song ever written, and why is it "Africa" by Toto? N: If we're ever interviewed by Nardwuar [The Human Serviette] I hope he knows that I dressed as him for Halloween once. HH: Also I think Paul and Anneliese were hoping to do a Jerry Springer-style interview someday with paternity tests and chair fights in front of a studio audience. FLR: What does 2018 look like for Gentle Brontosaurus? I know you're working on your sophomore album. N: We've started recording out at Cal's parents' barn in Cambridge, WI. You must have seen the big chart on Facebook. Once we get that released I think we're hoping to go out on tour again. Maybe reconnect with some of the folks we met on the road in 2016 or maybe play some shows around the upper midwest where we actually haven't been yet. FLR: The first album came on CD with a piece of toast. Will the new album come as a download code in a jar of jam? N: If someone bought our toast in 2015 and is still hanging onto it in 2018, I don't think jam is going to make it edible. HH: I'm not really into jam bands. Gentle Brontosaurus on Bandcamp Gentle Brontosaurus on Facebook

#interviews #Gentle Brontosaurus #scouting report #indiepop #Madison #Wisconsin

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ificouldflytotheclouds · 6 years

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Youngblood Album First Impressions

These are my initial thought after listening to the album for the first time.

Youngblood

I was at work when the studio version of this song first dropped, I was standing in the foyer as I waited for campus transportation to arrive. I was familiar with the song because I had listened to live recordings to prepare me for my concert, which at the time was three days away. My jaw dropped. The live version was good, but the studio version was a killer. This song is a deserves to be danced to, HARD. In concert, I don’t feel like this song goes as hard, and for that reason, I prefer the studio version. It’s funny because I thought this song went hard, I WAS NOT PREPARED.

I think this was an excellent title track and song to start the album. It encapsulates the feel of the entire album from the production, singing, and the lyrics.

Favorite Lyrics:

“Surrender my everything/'Cause you made me believe you're mine“

This line is so vulnerable and it tugs at my heartstrings.

“When you looking at those strangers/Hope to God you see my face”

I am a sucker for these lyrics after making eye contact with Luke during the concert, but I also relate this to the crush that at had at the time, and the friends that are no longer friends.

Want You Back

When I first listened to this song I was like wHo iS tHiS bAnD?? I think this was a good lead single (had they known the success of youngblood that might’ve been better, but it might not have gotten as popular if it came out of nowhere) to introduce the new song. Compared to rest of the album this song is fairly tame, I’ve listened to it so many times that ofc this is 5sos. I just wow I’m so proud of them (imma try not to write this through the entire post bc thats basically what I did on twitter all night)

Favorite Lyrics:

Is it tears or just the fucking rain? (who am I liking explicit lines, I am a changed woman)

And the way that I used to make you laugh/'Cause you know every morning I wake up/Yeah, I still reach for you/I remember the roses on your shirt/When you told me this would never work

Lie to Me

Out of the non-singles performed on tour (+valentine, talk fast, moving along), this one is my favorite. I fell in love with it instantly. It makes me think of Come Back… Be Here which is my second favorite Taylor Swift song. Ngl, hearing the studio version was a tad disappointing because I was hoping that there would be piano in the song, even though why would there be? Lol. It’s not like there was piano in the live version. Listening to the studio version made me understand the boys when they talk about the contrast the sad lyrics with the happy beachy vibe instrumental. I still LOVE this song, it was just a bit of a shock because I had unrealistic expectations for the studio version (I think I was thinking closer to Ghost of You vibes), regardless, I will request they release a piano cover of the song. The short clips of Luke on the piano is not enough. The harmonies in this song are so good and my hear hurts over the lyrics.

There is violin in this song and that needs to be appreciated. There’s also a certain sound at the end of the chorus that sounds like something else but I can’t remember what.

Favorite Lyrics:

And I caught you looking too, but you didn't look twice

Valentine

This song took me a while to get into. 1) The rhythm is very different from anything else I have heard by them 2) The word choices in the chorus, there are some words that automatically turn me off of songs they just sound cringy to me. After listening to the song enough I have gotten us to it and enjoy the song.

I don’t know why it took me so long to realize, well I do, it’s because I had to get used to the lyrics, but this song is HOT. Another good song to perform on tour to introduce how SEXY this album is, literally. It’s funny because I normally am not a fan of albums when they’re too sexual but I am so in love with this album and they also address the topic in a classy, normalizing way, that doesn’t just focus on being horny, there’s an additional psychological dimension within their song.

Favorite Lyrics:

We know we're classic together like Egyptian gold/We love us

Talk Fast

This was the only song they sang on the tour that I hadn’t heard the studio version, my jaw was on the floor (I mean it was for most songs but lol). This was my second favorite non-single song they performed on tour, it has a fun ‘80′s inspired feel. The bass (and the drums) stand out in this song.

Favorite Lyrics:

Leave all of your indecisions with you at home/Don't see you're doing me a favor

lol me.

God dammit we look good together

Moving Along

This song also took me a little while to get into, besides the beat, I think it has to do with the more talk quality of the song. And again, the interesting lyrics. But now you see me bopping. I feel like they chose very unique songs to perform on tour and I appreciate that it also gave me the time to love them, so now I can properly enjoy them now that the album is out.

Favorite Lyrics:

For this song, my favorite lyrics has to do more with what part of the song is the most fun to sing along to.

I know I’m the stupid one who ended it/And now I'm the stupid one regretting it

I've been thinking about you lots, lately/Or are you moving along?

If Walls Could Talk

This is the first new song that I heard and it was so exciting. From the first listen I knew that this is going to be one of my favorite songs. Which makes me scream because this is a straight sex song. This song just makes me smile and makes me want to dance.

This is the first song that Ashton has a proper feature and it makes me so happy :) I love the drums and the piano in this song. Michael’s guitar part during most of the song brings a lightness during the song but then during the bridge it brings the gritty, we're getting down and dirty aspect to the song.

-Disclaimer- I will not talk about bass enough through this post bc I do not have the best ear for bass, I am just not as familiar with the instrument. I can tell in some songs, but in others, I have to listen very closely but even then I don’t necessarily hear it (I mean I’m pretty sure Cal will be playing the piano in this song so... it makes sense)

Favorite Lyrics:

Bodies are hoping to get addicted to sound

I love this line. This is a song that makes you want to put your head back, dance and get lost in the music. It is a perfect representation of the song.

If these walls could talk, I'd hope they wouldn't say anything/Because they've seen way too many things

This lines really brings perspective. I find this song to be very vulnerable. The line is saying that it’s seen everything you’ve done within these walls, the sex, the desire, but also you break down crying, the look of falling in love, anger, and frustration as you hit the wall… The walls know your everything.

Better Man

Another Taylor Swift reference? Lol. But actually, this song reminds me of Ed Sheeran. I even feel like how it’s sung gives me ed vibes, the guitar, down to the mhhh.

This song is so cute.

Favorite Lyrics:

New friends again and again, gone when the morning comes/Demons I try to defend, but I couldn't get enough

This line stood out right away it was sad and relatable.

Wrapped in your arms, I swear I'd die for you

im not emo.

Another fav. This song goes so hard. It reminds me a little bit of ONE OK ROCK. There is a heavy guitar part, Ashton kills the drums at the end, and there's a shaker?? in this song too.

I mean... this is about Luke. It can easily apply to the other boys, but there’s a reason why this is a Luke dominate album.

Favorite Lyrics:

Enemy lines are drawn, lines are drawn

I love how Calum sings this line

I like a lot of lines in the album, the first verse is a standout, idk, this is a very sad relatable song.

Why Won’t You Love Me

Lol the first few seconds makes me think of Chole by Emblem3

This was the first song where I was still and entranced while listening to it. This is a very cinematic song, which is very beautiful but also makes me think of someone (cough cough) staring out a rainy window.

While I have never been in a relationship I can relate to this song, specifically to friendship. Sometimes people change or need something better even if nothing actually went wrong. I think this is something important to remember with any relationship, sometimes “It’s not you, it’s me” is as true as it gets.

The ooh at the end is cute.

Favorite Lyrics:

You say you can't wait and need to make a change

I check my phone to see your face/Staring back as if to say/Don't worry, you won't be lonely

Woke Up In Japan

I can’t help but think about my time in Japan while I listen to this (Even though I am actually visualizing China bc we were in a hotel for a short time, while the dorm we were in Japan was more like an apartment). This song is good, they lyrics standout the most, but it defs doesn’t stand out as much as other songs. It’s an interesting contradiction that I am trying to wrap my head around. It’s all over the place. The song is about amazing sex, the ecstasy of a night out while being in a bad mental place in another country. (even though japans probs metaphorical in this context)

Favorite Lyrics:

It was more than just a neon weekend

Empty Wallets

This is another song that does stand out too much but it’s still GOOD.

Favorite Lyrics:

Dancing on empty wallets

I love the visual

Shoulda caught a break/The fluid ain't to blame/For the sugar causing pain

Ghost of You

I’m not dying, I am already dead. This song pulls at my heartstrings so much. I can’t. It also reminds me of songs that they play in ‘00 movies which makes me emo (closest I can think of I’ll be, but that’s not exactly the feel I’m going for).

This is a masterpiece.

Favorite Lyrics:

The verses. I can’t pick.

Monster Among Men

Michael starting of the song. Yes. This song is funky and fun. I really enjoy the instrumental arrangement in this song, Ashton’s drumming goes hard, mikey’s guitar solo, cal on the piano. It’s amazing. This isn’t my #1 but it’s defs up there (as with the next to songs)

Favorite Lyrics:

one, two, three, four

I love how this switches with the beat. The oh no’s in this song also go hard.

it's time for me to admit/That I'm an asshole, so here I go

boy…wyd? At least you’re being honest.

Meet You There

The chorus, the beat drop. YESSSS. I also love the attitude of whatever will be will be, the universe will choose our destiny.

Favorite Lyrics:

I would break in bed, if you wanted me to

I. AM. SCREAMING.

Babylon

Calum F it up. The intro to this song. I had heard that a song sounded like FOB, my friend made the direct reference last night, but not until this morning have I finally been able to hear it. Sounds similar to centuries which is one of FOB’s best songs (that I’ve heard).

Favorite Lyrics:

The entire second verse

I'm tired of the feud, your short fuse, my half-truths are not amused/I wish we had a clue to start new, a white moon, no residue/The color of our mood is so rude, a cold June, we're not immune/But if we're way too faded to fight, you can stay one more night.

And there we have it, folks. I am so incredibly proud of these boys. This album was life-changing for them, their excitement feed off to us, and it followed through. I don’t think I’ve enjoyed an album so much since Made in the AM and that was back in 2015. Well, this will all I will be talking about for a long time. So I am sorry in advance.

Ranking to hopefully come later in the week.

Album Review/Ranking Masterlist

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fadingfartconnoisseur · 7 years

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AK Monthly Recap: July 2017

There’s nothing like summer in the city, feeling droplets fall on you and wondering if it’s pee.

I kid, I kid. At least 10% of the time I’m certain someone’s spitting out their window.

I spent almost all of the month sleeping in my own bed in New York, only leaving to visit the Keys for five days. Here are the best and worst happenings of July 2017!

Destinations Visited

New York, Amagansett, Montauk, East Hampton, Sagaponack, and Bridgehampton, New York

Key Largo, Grassy Key, Marathon, Big Pine Key, Stock Island, and Key West, Florida

Favorite Destination

KEY WEST. Man, do I love that place. So much fun, so chilled out, so beautiful, and as wacky as ever with all the Hemingways.

Highlights

A fabulous trip to the Florida Keys. I just wrote about the trip in depth, so I won’t repeat myself here, but the biggest highlight was hanging out with all the Hemingways at the lookalike contest!

My first real Fourth of July barbecue in years. I’ve been traveling so often on the Fourth of July, and when I’m at home, I usually hang out in Boston or go to a Red Sox game, so this was unusual! But my friend and her husband bought a house with a yard in Brooklyn this year, so yeah, they were kind of contractually obligated to invite all their friends over.

At that barbecue I was introduced to Secret Hitler. Have you ever played that game? It’s an insanely fun party game made by the Cards Against Humanity people. Think Clue plus politics. There’s nothing like celebrating your country’s birthday by accusing everyone of being fascists!

Hanging with blogger friends — and Miss Marcella. I keep joking that New York is the new Chiang Mai because so many travel bloggers pass through! This month, Steph from Why Wait to See The World (formerly Twenty-Something Travel) and Mike from Art of Adventuring visited for a few days with their 11-month-old baby Marcella. We met up with Jodi of Legal Nomads and former blogger Joel. Fun fact: I have partied with all of them in Thailand.

Steph and Mike are two of the blogger friends I’ve known the longest, so it was amazing to meet their baby. She’s definitely a kid of the 2010s — she smiles big as soon as you aim a phone at her! I hope to hang with the three of them (but let’s be honest, mostly Marcella) once they move to Bologna this fall. Like I need an excuse to drop by my favorite Italian city…

Celebrating a special bachelorette. A travel blogger friend celebrated her bachelorette party in New York this month and I got to plan a lot of it! While she was open about it being her bachelorette on social media, I’ll let her tell the story on her blog when the time is right.

Drinking on the Staten Island Ferry. This is my new favorite thing to do in New York. Did you know that it’s totally fine to drink on the Staten Island Ferry? They sell beer in both terminals and you don’t even need to brown-bag them. My friend Matt loves to do this and he invited all his friends to join him on his birthday.

The result? Around 25 of us rode the ferry four times in total, drank a variety of beers and ciders, ate cookies, visited the Flagship Brewery in Staten Island, and had a grand time! Matt even made us cozies that read “I don’t start partying — I keep partying.” SO MUCH FUN.

A fun day trip to Montauk and the Hamptons. My friends Beth and Colleen and I drove all the way out to Montauk, which is a bit ambitious for a day trip from New York (you should really stay overnight), but we had a blast anyway! I’ve wanted to visit Montauk since I got into The Affair, and we visited several sites from the show, including the Lobster Roll, the restaurant where many key scenes take place.

I really liked Montauk, even though we didn’t have the best weather. It’s very casual and down-to-earth, albeit quite expensive. Also expensive but much fancier were East Hampton and Bridgehampton, which feel like New York transplanted to the beach — LOVED it. Also, there was a guy with four border collie puppies and I got to play with them.

Later the weather cleared up and we stopped at the gorgeous Wolffer Estate Vineyards for a tasting. The single best dish I ate this month was the lobster spaghetti at Almond in Bridgehampton — perfectly cooked pasta with lobster claw meat, red scallions, grilled cabbage, lemon, crushed red pepper, and parmesan. There’s one in Manhattan, too!

Visiting the Museum of Broken Relationships display in New York. I visited the actual museum in Zagreb years ago and loved it, so I was delighted to hear the exhibit was coming to Flatiron for two days. It featured artifacts from New Yorkers’ past relationships and the stories behind them.

Challenges

I went through the biggest tech headache of my 7.5-year blogging career this month. My site was attacked twice by a Russia-based operation that disguised their traffic to make it look like it was coming from all over the world.

Not only did this shut down and block a lot of you from the site, I also took a financial hit. My display ads stopped running due to the influx of poor quality traffic and I had to pay a lot out of pocket to get the issues fixed.

And not only that — it took several teams of tech professionals weeks to figure out how to block the attack. Finally, the team at Sucuri figured it out and shut it down. If you run a website for business, I highly recommend you get protection with Sucuri so you’re prepared in case an attack happens to you. Their basic plan is just $9.99 per month.

Anyway, I went through hell and back this July. I’m glad to now have my site in the hands of the team at Performance Foundry, who are making my life infinitely easier by handling the site, protecting it, as well as managing myriad tech issues I never dreamed existed.

We had a weird encounter in the Hamptons. While at dinner at Almond, we sat down next to a table of slightly intoxicated men around our age. One made a comment along the lines of, “Sorry our friends are drunk,” and Beth said something innocuous like, “Oh, that’s fine with us.”

Well. We think that they might have misheard her, because that’s the only explanation for what happened next! They started glaring at us, making snide comments to each other about us. Then one leaned over and said, “You’re in town for the weekend? Oh, that’s CUUUUUTE. I live here.”

What the fuck?! Seriously?

Colleen and Beth and I looked at each other with giant fake smiles on our faces, unsure of what to say to each other. The men were sitting so close to us that they would hear everything we said. Eventually I started telling stories about Scrooge McDuck and we started talking about…that. Every time we laughed, their table would swivel their heads toward us and glare. One even banged his head on our table and pretended it was an accident.

The men left when our entrees came and as soon as they were gone, we exploded. What was their problem? Why would you treat strangers like that? What did they think she had said? We had been afraid to move or say anything because we didn’t know what they would do next and it looked like they were friends with our waiter. Just such a bizarre experience.

The “summer of hell” on New York transit. A lot of construction is taking place this summer, especially at Penn Station, and the trains are running slow and less often. 1 trains aren’t running to my stop on the weekend this summer, and on two different weeknights it took me two hours to get home from Brooklyn. This reminded me of how grateful I am not to have to commute to work, though.