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star-anise · 5 months

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Everyone's got a take, and I've got a take too, about the current Internet Villain: James Somerton, a gay Youtuber who just got exposed (in the back half of a 4-hour video) as massively plagiarizing the work of LGBTQ+ media critics, historians, and memoirists, and then exposed in another 2-hour video as just making up the wildest nonsense about the topics he demonstrably had access to accurate information on.

He achieved a six-figure income on his work by squeezing money out of his audience with claims...

That only he was creating content that preserved queer history and elevated the voices and experiences of the LGBTQ+ community (a lie)

He was in serious financial distress and would have to go out of business if people didn't give him tons of money (a lie)

That he was going to use some of that cash to make definitely good and not-at-all-plagiarized independent movies, a thing he was definitely skilled and experienced enough to do (a lie), and

That those plagiarism allegations were incorrect,, and frankly,,,, hurtful and homophobic. (a GIANT lie)

Like, here's a visualization of the script of one of his videos, "Society and Queer Horror". The highlighted bits were lifted nearly verbatim from the works of others—the 18 authors identified at the time the exposé was posted—and presented as Somerton's own work.

So here's what drives me absolutely up the wall about this:

If he had just ADMITTED that it was the work of other people, THAT WOULD STILL BE COOL. If he had just said, up front, "We are going on a survey of thoughts and insights people have had about this topic", that would still be a good video with a real audience!

Like yes, he studied business in university, he might not have gotten the kinds of research skills and knowledge someone like Kaz Rowe uses to not just report on the history and analysis of others, but evaluate their relative validity and trustworthiness.

But honestly, since watching my niblings (oldest is 13) watch Youtube, I think you honestly can't underestimate the number of viewers who are really hungry for someone saying, "I don't understand this topic! Let's explore it together!"

But NOOOOOOO, Somerton didn't want to be just some schmuck waxing enthusiastic about homoeroticism on film and acknowledging the smartness of other people. He wanted to be HIM, MR. SMARTYBOY, very sophisticated and alluring and thoughtful and deep. Definitely an intellectual heavyweight who just happened to spout off his own personal ideas and analysis that put him at the forefront of all the scholarship on the topic he's come across.

I hate being wrong. Hate being wrong. But blogging for most of my life has forced me to confront constant textual evidence that two or ten or twenty years ago, I said some dumb-ass shit. Honestly, it'd probably keep me up at night sometimes even if I didn't have a written record. I absolutely understand the desire to scan the field, find the coolest people around, and quickly clothe yourself in as perfect an imitation of them as you can manage.

But if you want to be an artist or a scholar who produces something lasting, you can't prioritize coolness over truth all the time. To develop your true, independent voice, you need to find a time and place where it is just you and just the work you're doing, and you have pick up your tools and say, I don't know if I'm doing this right, but this is what feels right to me.

There are a lot of things in life to which we can only truly contribute our presence and our perspectives. Things we can only witness or hold space for. We cannot go back and bleed the pain out of history, or erase the complexity of another person's life. Not honestly, at least.

But those are the times that need our presence, our perspectives, our witness, and our space. When we gather round and tell sad tales about the death of kings, honesty can be the only thing you give that's worth a damn in the large scale of things.

If this dude had owned up to the truth and honestly showed the work of trying to piece together a queer understanding of the world, trying to draw the threads of culture together until he found a place he fit inside them, it would have been so much more valuable to our culture as a whole.

He probably made more money this way, though. While it lasted.

#staranise original #james somerton #plagiarism #lgbt discourse

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swindle-comic · 7 months

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Hi hello, I'm Lolly!! :D It's very nice to see you again. I say that because my posts on this blog have gone from semi-frequent to rare to nonexistent in the last year or so. That's because I haven't really touched Swindle in quite a while. Though the last page of chapter 4 was only posted a few days ago, I finished writing the script for it in late 2021 and have since stepped back to focus on other things that provide mental enrichment.

I love this comic very much. I am insanely proud of it. Of myself and of Artsy. We've created something that is so fun and ridiculous. I think it is one of the most well crafted projects I've ever gotten to participate in. On all levels except physical I am placing it on my fridge for everybody to look at.

In all honestly, I haven't really been paying that much attention to this comic since the chapter 4 pages started rolling out. So I haven't really noticed that there is still a large consistent amount of readers interacting with it. I was surprised by the likes, the comments, the follower count, the art, the fics, the investment in general. It's all so cool, it made me really happy!!!

Thank you for all the support and patience and engagement!!!

Anyway, this comic being my pride and joy is the exact reason that it will be taking a rest for a while. I'm a perfectionist when it comes to building scenes and writing engaging and flowing dialogue and consistent characterization and BLAH. I want those ducks jumping off the pages. That is my goal. As a result, this comic takes an explosive amount of energy and commitment to write. Energy and commitment that I simply do not have to spare during this time. And I have no idea when I will.

So. It is time for Swindle to sleep for a while. It is time for Tybernation.

But wow!!! 4 chapters and 100 pages!!! That is super impressive I think!!!! So even if it takes a while for the story to resume, there's always plenty to revisit.

Anyway, that's all. Thank you for reading, I really appreciate it. Mwah mwah mwah <333

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moyokeansimblr · 3 months

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Update

Not feeling so hot and I'm not going to do anything impulsive at 8PM on a Friday evening but

here is a link to a sfs folder with ALL of my content that's currently only hosted on patreon.

I want to add individual sfs links to the tumblr posts but that's a lot and I'm now regretting never adding alt dl links this whole time... and sorry I don't think the downloads in the sfs folder are in order... it also might be some other things, like fixed meshes or stuff. tbh I just added everything I've made after April 3rd 2023 since that was the last time I uploaded anything to sfs.

I guess while I'm here... I was going to wait until after I finish up the last of my active requests (probably by Monday, I'm almost done) but I desperately need a break from CC. I sent a group message on the 17th to my $4 and $6 patrons encouraging them to cancel, but I know not everybody knows patreon even has dms so maybe you'll see this post and I'll reach out again in the coming days so nobody is wasting their money. I am so immensely burnt out and I need to not create for a while. This is completely my own fault, nobody made me work on CC for 8-10 hours 5 days a week for the last several months and I fully knew it wasn't sustainable ages ago but I kept doing it because it made me feel good, until it didn't. Quite honestly, even before I sent the group message the instant wave of relief I felt just having made the decision to take a break... that caught me off guard but just confirmed I need this. I do feel really awful about it because I feel like I'm letting people down but at the same time I don't want to hate creating which was already happening. That being said, I don't know how long the lull in CC is going to be, and if you're only following me strictly for CC I apologize. As said I am still finishing up one request I still had, I'm about 75% done with that as of this post. But that's gonna be it for a while.

There is a part of me that wants to stop using patreon completely and unpublish my creator page (which is what I'm not going to impulsively do tonight without properly thinking it through...since there are positives like how easy it is to download files and whatnot) but I'd again encourage not only those who joined the $4 and $6 tiers but also the $2 tier to cancel so that you aren't wasting your money. If I did do this I would definitely do the individual sfs links on everything first. I'd not just leave you guys unable to download my stuff.

So, what does that mean for this blog? I'll spare ye, impatient readers, who have already read a lot because I ramble⬇️

Well, as of posting this I still have THREE HUNDRED AND TWENTY FOUR Strangetown posts in my queue. And I'm not tired of playing that.

I'm looking forward to having an opportunity to do all of the things I've been neglecting. I'm finally going to go through the subfolder within my downloads of everything I'm downloaded the last few months and decide if I wanna keep it in my game or not. And finish default replacing everything. And all my other various little projects I haven't been doing.

Also, I want to start playing Veronaville 😮I've already started downloading lots from kattaty to replace the in-game ones, and I found a cool replacement for the neighborhood map. I am leaning towards making a new sub-blog for this so that you don't have to try and follow Strangetown/LFT posts and Veronaville/ALT posts at the same time. I've only ever played the Veronaville sims for like one day as part of a super failed megahood years ago so I'd like to get to know them.

So basically, I guess I'm a gameplay blog for now? Until I want to create anything again anyways, but I don't know when that will be.

I don't know how to end this post... I'm sorry for the disappointment, but thank you so much for enjoying my stuff 💛💛

#moyokean #sims 2 #ts2 #the sims 2 #thesims2

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choicesficwriterscreations · 5 months

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December Creator of the Month: Oh-So-Youre-a-Nerd

Each month, CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers or artists, and this month’s creator of the month is @oh-so-youre-a-nerd . We're very excited because Ascindio is our very first artist to be highlighted! We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Instagram

How do you want to be known on Tumblr?

Ascindio

More below...

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?

I started playing in 2016, I can't remember if I read Endless Summer or Rules of Engagement first, but I ended up deleting the app after like 2 weeks cause I couldn't stop buying diamonds 😅🤦

I re-downloaded it about, ohh idk 2 years ago?

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

I joined the Fandom specifically on Tumblr and specifically for It Lives Within, which happened to come out right after I read the first two books

3- How did you pick your blog name?

I always try to seem cool and mysterious when I meet people irl, and then as soon as I open my mouth, I ruin it with some niche trivia or something, and they say, “Oh, so you're a nerd.” 😂 Can't tell you how many times this exact phrase has been uttered to me.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!

This is the first Choices related post I made 😂 I was just thinking about the concept of what if characters make terrible decisions cause they're controlled by a player who is out of diamonds lol I was going to do a whole series of them (next was going to be lotr “fly on eagles to mordor?” *30 diamonds* or “simply walk”) but got lazy lol

5- Do you write fanfiction, create fan art, or are you one of those really gifted people who do both?

Only art. God, I WISH I wrote too. I've thought about trying cause I have so many ideas floating around in my head, but at the end of the day, I'd rather spend my free time drawing.

6- How long have you been creating for Choices and for any other fandoms?

For Choices, since early 2022

For other fandoms, since well, forever, but I only started posting around 2017/18

7- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to create for?

Favorite Choices book is probably It Lives in the Woods. All of the characters were so interesting, I never got bored reading it, and it had an incredible twist that made sense but I still didn't see coming.

Favorite to create for is probably Blades of Light and Shadow though because I am such a sucker for the fantasy aesthetic.

8- Share your first Choices fanfic or fan art that you posted with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were creating it today?.

This isn't the first Choices art I made, but it IS the first I actually shared

And honestly, I DO still like it because I still remember the way I felt absolutely POSSESSED while drawing it (I hadn't drawn anything for *months*). I would definitely change the background, though. Those trees look like shit, and they're not even the correct type for the kind of forest they're in.

9- What is your favorite piece of fiction or art that you created?

My favorite Choices art I've done is probably this piece.

10- Do you have a fic/art that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to do well but found it could use a little more love?

I definitely didn't expect this one to do well at all as it was so hastily drawn

And I was sad this piece didn't get more love, it was such a dope scene and I was so excited about how the sword turned out

11- If you could only draw one style or type of art for the rest of your life, what would it be and why?

I'm not sure if I'm interpreting the question right, but if I had to pick like a specific type of art, it would be digital, and I would want to do fan art. I have a hard time painting anything that I don't already have a deep connection with (so original art with no story behind it is usually a chore for me), and digital art is just so incredibly convenient and not messy and so so versatile.

12 - Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Because I use fiction as a way to safely process trauma/ grief/ other big emotions, each MC I make has a small part of me, whichever part I feel the need to explore at the time.

There's an amazing quote by Patrick Rothfuss that I feel explains it perfectly.

It's from Wise Man's Fear

“These folk knew all about death. They killed their own livestock. They died from fevers, falls, or broken bones gone sour. Death was like an unpleasant neighbor. You didn’t talk about him for fear he might hear you and decide to pay a visit.

Except for stories, of course. Tales of poisoned kings and duels and old wars were fine. They dressed death in foreign clothes and sent him far from your door. A chimney fire or the croup cough were terrifying. But Gibea’s trial or the siege of Enfast, those were different. They were like prayers, like charms muttered late at night when you were walking alone in the dark. Stories were like ha’penny amulets you bought from a peddler, just in case.”

13 - What element of writing/art do you struggle with most?

I have a very difficult time making the poses seem natural and flowing. My all time favorite art is Baroque/Renaissance style and how fluid the poses are, how soft the skin looks, how delicately it's all done. Obviously, I will always have my own style, but those are things that I so want to incorporate but never seem to get quite right, and it drives me crazy 😂

14 - Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

Not really. I mean, I have a ton of unfinished work, but as soon as the window of inspiration passes, I just can't get myself to care enough about it to finish it (insert Jake the Dog, “now it's gone, and I don't care about it anymore!” )

15 - If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to see your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you show them first?

I would, and have. I typically show them whatever most rendered recent picture from my Instagram because I don't post any nsfw there and usually try to post only my prettier work for this specific reason haha. (As opposed to here, I post everything here, ain't NO ONE from real life invited to see my tumblr 😂)

16 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing or art? Are there any artists that influence you?

Writers: Brandon Sanderson, for sure. He's the reason I got back into art back in 2017 ish. His stories are just so emotional they push me to create. Same with @saibug1022, there is always at least one scene from every story he shares that I desperately want to draw to try to capture the emotions.

Artists: God, sooo many, here are just like my top 3 favorites and their instagrams.

Audra Auclair

Obsessed with her unique style, and specifically the way she draws eyelids and noses

f3lc4t

The way they draw those dripping, glowing wisps. I stare at their pieces for hours (no lie) trying to dissect them stroke by stroke to figure out how they do it.

Miho Hirano

Their art has a delicate whimsy-ness I would SELL MY SOUL to achieve

17- Which one of your creations would you like to see a fiction written about?

JC, this is the shit I DREAM of.

Definitely this one.

So this is love.

This little comic means a lot to me.

18- Do you write original fiction or create non-fandom art?

Very rarely, but I do, every so often. This is my favorite original piece.

20- What other hobbies do you have?

Gaming, singing, walking through the Cemetary with my wee daughter, reading, that's about it 🤷

21 - What’s your favorite emoji?

🙇

22: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I really wanted to say that I don't believe in “good” art and “bad” art (just ethical vs non-ethical). That being said, I know what it's like to hate your art, like soooo intimately. If you ever are feeling shit about your art, you can ABSOLUTELY message me (I don't care if we're mutuals or not, I don't care if we've never interacted before) and just say, “I am feeling shit about my art” and I will go through your art and tell you every specific thing I love about it and why it's wonderful. I am not joking; I am so so serious rn. 💗💗💗💗

#choices fic writers creations #playchoices #choices stories you play #cfwc creator of the month #oh-so-youre-a-nerd #choices fanart #playchoices fanart #december creator of the month

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gatheringfiki · 7 months

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PSA: GatheringFiKi is back!

Hello, my favourite people!

If you've been with us for some time, following the mis-adventures of this little, but mighty fandom, or perhaps even taking part in them from time to time, you'll be delighted to hear that we are now in a position to resume normal service.

If you're joining us just now and wondering what on earth is going on - welcome! We are a small community focussed around the Fili/Kili pairing (and other fictional pairings fortrayed by Dean and Aidan), which has always traditionally ran frequent events to generate new content and encourage fan interactions.

Our activity was kinda suspended a year ago when our admin, @linane-art scampered off to travel the world for a year.

I have no idea why I'm writing this in 3rd person. Ahem, anyway - I'm back. And here's what I'd like to do with GatheringFiKi:

Firstly, I'd like to figure out how many content creators we actually have at the moment, since these folks are my audience. So if you are currently actively writing / creating artwork or edits in the Fili/Kili fandom, or plan on doing so in the near future, please REPLY TO THIS POST. Please also feel free to forward it to anyone who might want to respond.

Whatever else happens, there will be a 12 Days of Christmas event happening in 2023! I have no idea how many photosets I will actually be able to make before mid-November, but I'm aiming for at least a couple. It's such a highlight of every Christmas for me, I can't wait!

There may or may not also be some little prompts posted for Halloween this year. This would be about a week before the 31st, a very informal little event.

Whatever else happens, from now on, I would like to see GF becaome an amplifier for any and all new Fili/Kili content. Updates to your existing fics, new fics, artwork, edits, photosets, and not just the things 'worthy of recs'. ANY new Fili/Kili content - please submit or send us a link and we will re-blog, so it reaches more folks.

If we still have a decent number of creators, we will go back to running events. The plan would be to run a survery before the end of 2023 for you to pick your favourite events and run 3-4 of those accross 2024.

If we don't have creators, I will focus on delivering only the 12 Days of Christmas event annually and promoting any new FiKi content as above, based on the assumption that we're all reverting to focussing on our own works and posting them unprompted.

If you have any ideas, comments, or concerns about how this community could/should be ran - please let us know!

It's lovely to be back!

~linane-art

#GatheringFiKi #Fili/Kili #FiKi #Durincest #the Hobbit #Mitchers #Britchell #DarkHawk #PSA

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the-trans-advice-blog · 2 months

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Welcome to The Trans Advice Blog!

I created this blog years ago to connect with the trans community and hopefully offer some advice or words of positive to those you can. I just wanted to make a post talking about what you might find here.

1. Asks! Please feel free to send them. Whether you’re just telling me about your day, asking for specific advice, telling me about your name, submitting photos of yourself or your pets, or pretty much anything else you can think of! As long as it’s appropriate feel free to say whatever you like.

2. Queer art! I really really want to use this blog to promote queer artists that post their work here so feel free to tag me in your posts if you’d like me to reblog them.

3. Signal boosts! If you have any sort of fundraiser, informational post, or anything you think needs to be spread around please submit a post or send and ask. I’d love to help anyone I’m able to.

4. Reblogs! I try to queue as much as I can so I’m able to have a consistent flow of posts. If there’s anything I reblog that poses a problem or comes from and problematic source please let me know.

5. Nsfw! I’m 20 years old and may from time to time post things that are a little more vulgar. It won’t be porn, it won’t be overly explicit, but sometimes I want to post about kissing fags or something. I’d say I’ll keep it relatively pg-13 but if you’re not comfortable with stuff like that this might not be the place for you. Also I reclaim a lot of slurs for myself, I never use them on people I don’t know without consent but if you’re not okay seeing this you shouldn’t follow me.

6. Overall I just want this to be a safe space for those who need it. I love posting educational things and positivity! I’m always happy to take requests for types of posts you’d like to see.

Link to my personal intro

Here are links to the art I used for my pfp and header!

#marshal talks #the trans experience #transgender #trans #transmasc #ftm #lgbt #trans guy #ftm trans #nb #mtf #transfem #queer

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softhoagierolls · 2 months

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Dylan Robert Jones ; Document direction

1. Name / location -Dylan Robert Jones / Queens NY

2. What inspires you - I’m going to answer this with a story. A few years ago, I had zero interest in making visual art. I hadn’t made anything since high school and I certainly didn’t see myself as a visual artist, but one day I did this exercise where you write a letter from your inner child to your current self. You use your non-dominant hand so as to more easily tap into your repressed feelings. The writing was an extremely cathartic experience, but what was more interesting was that immediately after I had finished the writing, I created a doodle with my left hand of this distressed robot character and colored it in (see first image). It was evident that that drawing was a reflection of my world at that current moment. I then had the revelation that I didn’t have to try to convey anything with my work, that anything I made would be a symbolic expression of my emotional landscape and would be good in and of itself because of this. So what inspires me really is this nonverbal process of excavating and releasing hidden emotions through art.

3. Favorite song right now -I love u in me by Prince I Love U in Me

youtube

4. Medium of choice -Pens and colored pencils

5. Goal with art -My goal is to eventually be able to make enough money through art and music that I don’t have to work full time at a draining job anymore.

6. Who does it right - Bonobos, Norwegians, transition skaters, country singers, old cars, penguins, dancers, lucid dreams, old people, ghouls, state parks, graffiti artists, herbal teas, free online movies, pens, my singing teacher, farmers, friends, sand tray therapists, trees, Neanderthals, William Wonka, the beach boys, glass, blue collar workers, sobriety, turtles, seashells, oats.

7. Is social media evil - No, but it can land anywhere on the spectrum between evil and good depending on the particular situation. Usually it’s pretty shitty but without it my life would have taken a totally different course. For instance, I met my fiance through social media 12 years ago when we were teenagers, so I’m grateful for it.

8. Opinion on time - It’s scary as fuck, but one thing that comforts me is thinking about how all our differences will inevitably be swallowed by the ocean of time. What I mean by this is that in several hundred years time me and the person I hate will be seen as virtually one and the same.

9. Favorite blog - All the blogs that just post photos of Lana Del Rey. Those are chill.

10. Thanks / shout outs -

Thanks Jacob for interviewing me!

#queens new york #art #soft hoagie rolls #dylan robert james

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nerdygaymormon · 4 months

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I just found this blog and I got super excited because lately it’s been feeling like both my online and irl life surroundings have been trying to convince me that my faith and my sexuality (I realized about two years ago that I’m bi and I am also a very active member of the church) are two separate and sometimes even opposing sides to my identity even though I know that they’re just two ingredients in the Me Soup that don’t seem like they mix on paper but you can’t make Me Soup without both of those ingredients (sorry if that doesn’t make any sense). There are a few people that I’m out to and they get it but they don’t get it and even just skimming a few posts on this blog has helped me to feel a little better. I’ve never doubted that I’m loved and accepted by God and my family no matter what (thankfully) but it’s really hard to find other places that makes me feel totally accepted, whether we’re talking about my faith or my sexuality they have a hard time with. I also really appreciate that you seem to have an attitude of ‘what’s right for me won’t be right for other people’ instead of ‘there is a definitive right and wrong way to deal with this’ and I feel like that’s a really rare thing to find online. Thank you for creating this safe place to exist

Thank you for such a kind note!!!

As a queer person, I don't feel incompatible with God, but sometimes I have struggles with the LDS church and hope it will figure out that all are alike unto God.

Queer Mormons get each other in a way that few others do. Check the hashtag #queerstake and you'll find more of us. Also, we're on Discord at #queerward (DM me for more info)

There are some groups out there that may be of interest to you. I'll list a few of them:

Lift+Love has monthly zoom group meetings for people.

Affirmation is an organization for queer LDS people no matter where they are in their faith journey, and may have a local chapter near you where you can meet others (not all the chapters on the map are currently active, but worth a shot).

Last year was the first Gather Conference, and about 1400 people showed up to Provo for it. I'm not sure when it will be held in 2024, but if you're able to make it, I think you'll really get a lot from it. Meanwhile, you can check out videos of the presentations from the 2023 conference.

Beyond the Block podcast was maybe the first podcasts created to go with the Come, Follow Me study program. It is hosted by a gay man and a Black man. They aren't currently making new episodes, but they did weekly episodes for 4 years so there's likely an episode for nearly every week's Come, Follow Me lesson

Questions from the Closet is a podcast by two gay men in Provo. One recently married his husband and they still attend church, the other guy is also an active Latter-day Saint and just announced he's going to start dating.

Over the years I've written about a number of scripture verses from a queer perspective. One day I'll make a post which will contain links to all of them, but until then, you can do a search for the hashtags #queer faith & #queer scriptures.

I hope you find many resources and communities which affirm all that is part of your Me Soup.

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kraaico · 1 year

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Where/how do you get the ideas to make these super cute art? I love art but I basically copy others and I wanna have my own style.

What a nice question!! I could honestly write a book about this, but for now I'll keep it condensed. (maybe uhhhh a blog post later or smthn) ....Sorry it's long anyway lol

These are my thoughts as an independent illustrator/artist that has the time and freedom to create what I wish, keep that in mind. I can't vouch for what it takes to get through art school or build a portfolio for <specific thing X> cause I don't know shit about that, this is just for creating art that you love making.

✨️Developing a style ✨️

A lot of people talk about 'finding your style', but I'm personally an advocate of developing a style - and most importantly it being a process that never stops. Now I don't know how old/experienced you are, but especially when you are just getting into art (and with 'just' I mean years) it'll change a lot because you will be improving a lot!

Now for me personally, I've been busy ~finding a style~ since I was 10. And up to like 2 years ago (I'm now 28) I was frustrated I just wasn't able to find one. Every half year or so I'd try to get back into art "for real this time", stick to one medium and general style and/or subject, and within a matter of weeks become frustrated and then not draw for a good while. That style-mentality really took a toll on the fun I had in making art, but also stunted my own artistic development. I was restricting myself at a stage where I should be everything BUT. I told myself I wasn't good enough, not cut out to be a professional, wouldn't be able to sell myself if I couldn't stick to one thing, yada yada. Great mentality. I'm now in therapy!

Anyway, what broke me free of that was a promise I made to myself back in 2020. I told myself I would get back into making art, but this time, just do what feels fun *at any given moment*. Let go of the pressure. I didn't post to socials and just shared with my friends, and eventually started posting to my then very humble Twitter following. I liked Twitter, cause there wasn't the pressure that Instagram always gave me of having to have a perfect feed. So I drew digitally, I drew with pencils, did some painting, got oil pastels, tried collage. And those experiments all influenced one or another. That's been key for me. If I feel like I hit a creative wall, I just try another medium or another CSP brush or another app on my tablet. Just experiment with lines and colors and not worry about what ends up there. (it's usually cats) Creating like this kept the fun in it for me and I've created nearly every single day since then, and that too is key to style development: Create A LOT. Don't hyperfocus on one perfect piece when you can also create 4 good-enough pieces in the same time.

Now on the topic of copying: it's a natural thing to do. Just be responsible about it! (don't share on socials if you blatantly copy something. While it's a good method to learn certain techniques, it's something that should stay in your private sketchbook) Also be sure to study from many different places, don't fixate on just a couple of artists! Find what inspires you in real life: be it buildings or nature or animals or people or objects, and try to capture them in different ways: from realistic to just the basic shapes. You'll find out what kind of style and level of detail you're naturally drawn to soon enough. Creating your own visual library in your mind by drawing many different things is ultimately what will allow you to put your ideas to paper in a quick and intuitive way. Having a (cheap!) sketchbook that you don't show anyone but just goof around in and explore everything and anything is a very helpful tool.

✨️ Generating ideas ✨️

I get my ideas from SO many different places. Many of my cat paintings were actually created to deal with a strong emotion or feeling I was having at the time.

Now externally, I get a lot of inspiration from nature and from the place I live in. I used to live in a fairly urbanized area, but it wasn't until I moved to the country side with wide and far views that I saw daily that I started getting interested in drawing landscapes. I didn't draw a lot of cats until they were chilling in my garden everyday. When I lived at home I drew a lot of fish, cause my dad had an aquarium. What you see and observe everyday matters. Taking your camera or phone on a walk in the neighborhood and capturing small details is a great way to gather inspiration, even if the area is a bit boring. I have a Fujifilm X100F that I try to carry to most places I go, cause I can quickly photograph things and I like it better than phone photography.

I also draw a lot of ideas from the media I consume: shows, movies, games, comics, music... Sometimes it just hits that inspiration button and lights a lil flame that'll turn into an idea. I love the magical worlds Studio Ghibli creates for example and the soothing calmness that games like Animal Crossing and Stardew Valley have. Things like that just work their way into my art, often subconsiously.

I also draw what I yearn for: be it a doodle of a comforting hot bowl of soup when I crave it, or a beach scene cause I want to go for a beach walk. It's fun, and lets me daydream a little about things I maybe cannot have in that moment.

Another big thing is worldbuilding and storytelling: I have this fictional world in my mind that I desperately want to get out, and it will, piece by piece.

So yeah. There's many places to grab inspiration from. Writing down what inspired you is useful. Doing it every year or so is too, cause then you'll start to see trends and get a better understanding of what drives you. Cause in the end that's what's most important, I think: Find the things that ignite a flame in you and then let it out in a way that is fun and comforting to you. Don't worry about what other people are making or that you're not making what you 'should' make!

I hope this was somewhat helpful - it was fun to write at least, I have many thoughts about this :')

#art #art process #art education #personal #ask #thoughts #learning artist #learn art #creativity #art style #illustration #infodump #tldr: have fun making what you wanna make #you're spending more time with your art than anyone else #better to make sure you're enjoying it #artists on tumblr #art resources

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duchessofostergotlands · 7 months

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sorry if you’ve answered this before but how come you run a monarchy blog if you’re anti monarchy? i’m genuinely curious, i’ve never seen that before

I have answered it before but Tumblr's search function isn't great and it's probably time for an update. It's not as unusual as you think. There are a ton of people from Republics in this fandom who would never want to live in a monarchy themselves (come visit the fandom on 4th July lol). They're politically anti-monarchy, but they like the individuals. So I'm really not in any way unusual. But basically it was an evolving journey:

I became interested in monarchies at age 4 or 5. So clearly pre any kind of political thinking. I was mostly interested in historical monarchies - I've been obsessed with Anne Boleyn most of my life, I have a tattoo dedicated to her!

I started blogging about royals about 12 years ago so I was around 18 or 19. I wasn't massively politically active so I didn't have a strong opinion on the monarchy. I was at St Andrews at the time of William and Kate's engagement so I became quite interested in that but nothing serious. Then I was on my non-royal Tumblr (don't use it anymore) and I stumbled across an account who was saying really nasty things about Kate. This particular account was one of the few British people in the fandom at the time - it was mostly young Americans - and so they had an air of authority about them and they would say "this is what most Brits think" but it was bollocks. And then I would research other things they'd said about things like finances and realise that they were wrong about those too. There were one or two people who questioned her narrative but they weren't British and so after a couple of years of this I just had had enough and decided to create an account. I wasn't really a monarchist or an anti-monarchist. I liked William and Kate but I dislike people talking rubbish more! I had really just stumbled into this world and realised there was a place for someone who was going to provide evidence, who was going to challenge, and who could offer a different perspective on life in a monarchy. And monarchy as a system was something that had interested me since I was little so it seemed natural.

After a little bit of time I became more politically active and at that point I became anti-monarchist. It was a gradual shift so there was no moment where my mind changed but I didn't feel the need to leave anyway. Partly because it was fun. I liked blogging and I knew a lot about royals by this point, I didn't want to start from scratch in a more crowded fandom. I realised I can separate the institution from the people. I can like Kate but not think monarchy is a perfect system of governance. There are so many things that we find fascinating but don't necessarily endorse. I mean, I listen to a fuck load of serial killer podcasts but I don't think Ted Bundy was a great guy! I just find it interesting. If you've ever heard our podcast you'll know I am obsessed with corruption scandals. They're not good but I find power fascinating as a concept. But also this is just my nature. If I'm going to take a stance about a political matter I want to know as much about that as possible, I want to have considered the opposing argument and what their objections might be so I can counter them. And I found it frustrating when I saw friends of mine who generally shared my political views say stupid, incorrect things about the monarchy. Like this came later but a friend of mine once complained that they spent money on Meghan's wedding dress instead of the cladding on Grenfell which is rubbish.

I'm now in my 30s, I am at a very different place from when I started. Anti-monarchist is probably too simplistic but I've had the same bio and photo for like 5 years so I'm not changing it lol. My political view now is more pragmatic than anything else. But I've also done so much more research into the constitutional side of things than I had 5 years ago. My view now is if I could click my fingers and change our system of governance to a functioning, elected head of state without any issues of course I would. Just taking a step back it makes no sense to have a monarchy and for our head of state to be a symbol of such glaring inequality. But we can't just click our fingers. Ending the monarchy won't actually solve any problems in society but it could cause new ones. There are positives to having a monarchy, it does work to protect democracy even though it shouldn't, and so I would have to be presented with a system that keeps those positive aspects if I was to vote to end the monarchy. On a theoretical level I don't support it, it makes no sense, but on a practical level I think there are more important things, it won't be the quick fix people say it will be, and I would need guarantees about what a Republic would look like first as Brexit has shown us that we can only trust the Tories to deliver the worst possible outcomes if we leave it to them (which is what would happen).

#ask #anon #personal #royal fandom #faq

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misssmeat · 2 years

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Hi, everyone!

I just wanted to share a short little post to commemorate the fact that I created my blog 5 years ago.

For those of you who don’t know, I originally made this blog with a partner as I was getting back into kink after a 4-year vanilla relationship. That partnership didn’t work out, but I’ll be forever grateful that it led me back to the kink community that has had my back since day one.

This blog has brought me some of my closest friends, greatest loves, and a sense of belonging that I simply cannot find anywhere else.

So, while this dumbass website continues to flounder, I’ll continue to be here. Sharing my stories, thoughts, tears, and sex adventures I never want to forget.

Thank you for joining me the last 5 years. I love you all.

#feelings!!!!#big long post coming up for my 30th bday #but for now #pls accept my gratitude

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behindthewox · 1 month

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Hello, Andrew here. This blog article was sent to me and I can assure you that this is not correct information but a reaction likely of those who were involved. This information likely stems from previous MoM or HM themselves, I guess, seeing that they have been banned properly recently (which I am only stating because you already stated it yourself, otherwise I would not give away who is or is not banned)

When I took over I made it very clear in an NB post that the harrassment of users, witch hunt on site, and generally toxic and disrespectful behaviour needs to stop. Everyone is more than welcome to share opinions, but this was not that, this was simply insanely rude behaviour that was based on wrong information given by the MoM/HM to the other leaders of WoP, who then compiled their letter. Which is also the reason why after all of this these other site leaders were put back into their positions after everything was cleared up.

I have banned a total of 4 people from 800-900 actives at the time for continuing their disrespectful behaviour and outright slandering (one of them later on) despite my very clear warning in the article (I was surprised that it was only so few, but almost everyone was just glad to be able to enjoy the website again). I also made an effort to respond to each single comment transparently and open minded. Many of the people who removed content or joined that group hype have talked to me, told me their opinions, and gave me the opportunity to work on their missing trust together. I am on good terms with almost all of the old staff with maybe 5 exceptions (MoM, HM for being the reason this went down and one old staff on bad terms; the other two people I am neutral towards as I never spoke with them and don't know their thoughts) Every old staff member who reached out to me has their own experiences and opinioms and don't always agree with me, but they are more than valued and often play important roles in our staff as well - whether student or grad. In fact, I really enjoyed every single talk with them and appreciate anyone who reached out despite their fear of rejection, as that takes a lot of courage

The old MoM and HM were banned later on, yes, you can feel free to ask them for the exact reason I put in. The previous behaviour of theirs is unwelcome on site, and they created a horrible environment for people at the time this happened, just because of a "money grabbing" feature that was completely changed back anyway for other reasons. One of them was still logging in on alt for reasons I don't really understand, because they made sure everyone knew their hate towards Dan and the site. So why log in almost regularly even after almost a year? I guess I know why ,but that is just an assumption, so I will not voice it here

Aside from that, if you paid attention to the site development, you would also see that since then (but not because of that), new users got free VIP, people with jobs get discount, linking accounts gets a whole 50% discount, and such

I am mostly replying to clear some things up because I don't enjoy reactions that are based on false facts. I wanted to stay on WoP US as a temporary solution, but the community has been loving and welcoming, which was really unexpected considering the circumstances they went through

This is something that happened almost a whole year ago now, I even unbanned one of the 4 bans that took place when I took over, so technically it is only 3

I hope that this could clear up confusion and misunderstanding. I would like to see this message public because I am mostly writing it for the very few that might end up seeing it. Considering the nature of this post, you already made up your mind about me and that is okay. But I want to give my insight first hand, as I don't enjoy someone trying to slander my name based on more accusations of those people who were banned for false accusations in the first place

Magical regards,

Andrew Sutherland (WoP US)

By the way, I am only asking this anonymously because of privacy concerns regarding this account (never use Tumblr anyway)

Added in a later message: "Andrew here again, please add this xD I saw that you have made clarifications regarding there possibly being more to these accusations, my response was mainly aimed towards the person asking the question, but I do admit that I thought that that message was originally from you, the blog writer, and only saw your response later on (I am not used to tumblr and on phone it doesnt show all on one screen, oops). Just wanted to clarify that as it may explain some wording of mine!"

No hard feelings on my side, thanks for the clarification! If I can share both sides of the story, that is what I want to do and you've allowed me to share yours. It's greatly appreciated and I hope this clears the air a little bit.

NOTE: I can't verify if this person is who they say they are, the anonymous submissions are anonymous to me as well. I have no reason to doubt or suspect that it's someone else writing in their name, but I want to note that with anonymity there is a risk of abuse and impersonation. I don't think that's the case here though.

#wox #wox site

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haveaclock · 10 days

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Uhm...

Hi everyone?

Back from my little break I guess.

1 year is quite little

yea sure April 18 ,2023( the last time I posted) was a long time ago but,

"It's April 21st!! Of 2024!!"

oh wait I'm talking to myself again..

----------------------------------------------

Guess whose back, Back again, Shady's back..tell a friend.

yea

I have an excuse! I was going to take a break in observance of my little sister turning 10 (she's 11 she's growing up way too fast), boom one year later.

Genuinely forgot why I left Tumblr,for that matter social media after that..blame it on mental health and stress.

People should know that stuff happens in a year, things change. So guess what, this blog is changing..whoopi. Excluding my pfp I love it so much for absolutely no reason

-----------------------------------------------

Blog things.

When I created this blog, I was in my "Jeantonio era", Jeantonio hyperfixation, if you were a CS fan in late 2022 most likely I was in your screen yapping about them and what not. Literally that was all my blog was good for, for that reason alone.

Yea, no more of that. I'm guessing the light switch turned off. I don't know what happened genuinely speaking they just aren't like..you can say I've gotten mature, when I look back at my posts I want to cry, bawl and curl up into a ball fetus position by the pure cringe of it. I don't know.

Not all only Jeantonio, it's just CS in general, sure I'm in a discord server (hi @tiredguyswag) about La Femme Rouge but I really just don't feel the same way about the show I used to. Blame it on personal life I guess.

now that I say that all I say on discord is how I stopped having a Jeantonio hyperfixation 🙃

Anyways,

Don't get me wrong I still love the,but I'll barely post about them. Yea, mind blower.

Next segment

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Bio thing

It's funny how I haven't made this before but that's that I guess,

- I go by Cassandra,

(@r41nb0wzzz DO NOT CALL ME OUT, I KNOW WHAT MY NAME IS.)

-Minor (don't hit on me 😒)

-She/Her

Hobbies: Drawing, Animations, Running,..does talking count?

.. I'll just skip to the fandoms part.

- Avatar:The Last Airbender

- Carmen SanDiego (kinda obvious)

- Any kind of children's show

-Mandela Catalogue

- MLP

- Undertale, but just barely

- Steven Universe

- Genshin Impact

-Spiderverse

I've forgotten now

Now, this shall come as a Total shocker for you guys but,

- Total Drama Island

see what I did there

next segment

-------------------------------------------------

Everyone knows what a hyperfixation is,

A character(s) or show, or something you like so much you traumatize them or you draw them in class so much you have 3 full pages of that one character.

(Okay, funny thing is I've never drawn El Topo and Le Chèvre like, never in my life until like, January this year during Carmen week, crazy.)

Anyways, I'm pretty sure I was never one of those users that had a new hyperfixation like, by the day, "Jeantonio 4 life man"

Which is funny,

Okay I'll get on with it Rajbow (Raj and Bowie) is cool guys.

I love Rajbow so much man..

It's like ... it's like Terry McGurin watched Carmen SanDiego and then implemented Jeantonio onto Total Drama Island.

I will go on and on about them like..

Like look at them!!

Look.

Goofy Goobers times 2x man..

I didn't even mention Wayne man..Wayne!!!

I will put each of them in my pocket..each!

It's a brainrot.. man..

Will I be making remarks about my hating Bowie? No!

Le Chèvre got them because I hated him but now I don't because I forgot my reason,

or I just made him too fem queen in my head..

I love Bowie man..

And Raj..

And Wayne..

Platonic Raynebow 4 life man..

--------------------------------------------------

I forgot the majority of the stuff I came here to say, so I'll just say what I remember, and leave you guys to forget this,

-I'm going to delete a lot of my old posts most likely this weekend, they were very cringe man, understand where I'm coming from...

-Thetalkwithaveaclock isn't coming back, it's getting killed off. But then again nobody cared or knew what it was,

- Posting won't be something you'll be getting in every 56 seconds, it's more like every 56 days or something..I either just don't want to come back to Tumblr or its school man..

-----------------------------------------------

Yeah, that's pretty much it..I forgot a lot of what I was going to say to you guys, okay..uh..

Anyways,

Bye Bye..CS nation?.. I'm guessing the majority of this will be read by CS nation..

- cassandra

#i was not being serious with this man #carmen sandeigo netflix #total drama

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universeinthebox · 10 months

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Hey again

Shout-out to all the people who liked and commented on my last post. Glad to know that Squeak hasn’t been forgotten. =)

Comments:

winterstraystar said: For Sonic: Thank you for still looking out for his blog, it means a lot. For Squeak: Hope you are going better wherever life has taken you. I hope you live with no regrets

You’re welcome. I should mention that I’ve done a little writing, and one of my stories is about Squeak. Here it is: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/528407/thanks-for-the-memories

I can’t believe how long it took me to get a fimfiction account. It says something about all the trauma I’ve been through.

There were a lot of us in the Box with mental health struggles of one sort or another. It was really valuable to have that space to talk, and also create! It reminds me of that one Subnormality comic...

pinkusponkus said: Squeak did so much for so many people. I miss him!

Thank you! We miss him too!

kasamari said: I miss the care and love of the whole team you guys put together. I will keep following this and Squeak’s other spaces in the hopes that I get the chance to tell Squeak that the soldier who left his pregnant wife for training all those years ago is now a proud father of 4, still married to the same amazing woman. I will always be so grateful for the story of Good Night and for the wonderful Ponies in a Box that worked to share so many stories.

CONGRATULATIONS! Hip Hip Hurray! I hope we can all be so fortunate. =)

You didn’t ask for advice, but I’m gonna provide some anyway. My favorite parenting book is Unconditional Parenting by Alfie Kohn. Also, conventional school sucks and kids would be much better off at Sudbury Schools: https://www.facebook.com/HudsonValleySudburySchool/videos/10155951019968804/ (The teachers are better off too!) Anyway, give your kids a hug from us. And maybe show them an old PIAB video or two =)

And hopefully, hopefully someday you’ll be able to tell Squeak the news directly. I’m sure he’d be happy for you. =)

warbalist said: I miss writing music for his stuff. 😭

Oh wow, you wrote music for him? (Sorry, I don’t recognize the username!) What did you write?

I miss working with him too. I miss the sheer sense of possibility we had in 2012, in the brony fandom generally and especially with Pony in a Box. I still remember how I was on vacation and Squeak came up with the idea for The Best and within 12 hours it was fully written, recorded and posted on Youtube. Or how about that time the other boxers and me secretly made a short for Squeak’s birthday?

I miss hearing our stuff premiere on Celestia Radio. I miss reading the comments as they came in. I miss the little ARG we did for Wrong Way Backwards. I miss the feeling that anything was possible.

I’m really sad that I didn’t go to BronyCon 2013. A lot of PIAB people were there, and in retrospect that was the best opportunity I ever had to see the boxers in person. But my mom had cancer and I had anxiety mixed with self-hatred and the flight seemed too much of a risk and it didn’t seem fair to mom so in the end I didn’t go. =(

I miss my box friends. Too many of us had IRL problems at the same time, and we gradually scattered to the winds. We’ve still got a discord server but it rarely gets any activity. It’s so sad. =(

Special shout-out to Togpie, who was a vital support to me during some extremely difficult times in my life. I think maybe she burnt out, caring for me all the time. If so, I don’t blame her. She worked really hard to help me when she was already busy with her own problems. I haven’t heard from her in over a year now. I hope she’s ok...

It’s strange how Life is so much grander and deeper than it seems. Do you know what I mean? There is so much meaning and passion and joy and opportunities taken and opportunities missed just in this one little group of people. There are so many things that shaped us, so many traumas that the Box helped us face, and then the Box itself drifted away because we still hadn’t found perfect solutions to Life’s problems.

And here I am, posting this little thing that a handful of people will see. How will it impact you? What’s your story?

A good life is possible, I’m sure. The solutions involve things like Children’s Rights and Sudbury Schools and Democracy and Universal Basic Income. The solutions involve things like ponies and fandoms and community for its own sake. The solutions involve knowing that you matter and your feelings matter, and it’s ok to cry when you’re hurt and it’s ok to get mad at abusive people and systems.

I think of the billionaires of the world and I wonder why they don’t just feed the poor. I’ve had a lot of friends who deserve money, good people tied down by bad circumstances. I’ve given a few thousand myself, trying to figure out how much I can afford considering I still can’t manage a full-time job (on account of my mental health). And I wonder why anyone thinks Elon Musk is a good person, seeing that he has so much money but he refuses to help people.

I think back to a time when guys openly liking ponies would have been impossible, when this fandom would have been impossible, where the formation of Pony in a Box would have been impossible. I wonder how many wonderful memories past generations never got to experience because of their stupid rules, and I’m glad for the progress we’ve made and the hope of more progress to come, and I’m also very sad that more progress hasn’t happened already.

Every so often I google anti-aging medicine (which is a legit field now) because I want to make up for all the time I’ve lost to trauma and abuse.

In the meantime, though, I’m glad we had Pony in a Box. And I’m glad that the fandom still exists. And I hope that the choices I make today will help future generations. Maybe new opportunities will come our way, like the TARDIS fading in from the Vortex.

Thank you, my friends.

Onwards and Upwards --Sonicsuns

#brony #SqueakAnon #pony in a box #sudbury schools #children's rights #universal basic income #progress #fandom #trauma #hope

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choicesficwriterscreations · 8 months

Text

September 2023 WOTM: lilyoffandoms

Each month CFWC highlights one of our talented fanfic writers, and this month’s writer of the month is @lilyoffandoms. We hope you will enjoy learning more about them and their work below! The writer is selected at random. More info can be found on the navigation page.

This month's Writer of the Month was selected a little differently than normal. We announced that we would be selecting the WOTM from the participants in last month's Writer Appreciation Event. But the eleven writers involved all agreed the honor belonged to Lily. Lily has been a staple in the Choices community for so long, and they continuously go out of their way to support creators and spread positivity while continuing to inspire and create themselves. We couldn't think of anyone better suited for the honor, so please join us in congratulating Lily... September's Writer of the Month!

Quick Links:

Tumblr Blog Name: lilyoffandoms Blog Masterlist

How do you want to be known on Tumblr? Lily is fine (they/them preferred)

1- When did you start playing Choices? What was the first book you played?

Best guess would be back in January of 2018. It was a joke at first since a friend saw one of their god-awful ads and said we should both try it. Next thing you know, we were both arguing over which books were better and regretting our decision to start. Though their opinions on what constitutes good books are almost as bad as the Choices ad that got us to jokingly play (and I say this most lovingly because they are awesome and I love them). I started with Most Wanted, and my friend started with The Freshman.

2- When and why did you join Choices fandom?

Oh gods! I joined back in March 2019. I know I’m a Tumblr baby by most everyone’s standards, but that feels like a really long time. I joined when Open Heart book one was released. I had lurked, reading fanfics, for a few months before biting the bullet and creating a blog and actually posting. Only joined because I was taking my editor’s advice and writing something entirely outside my norm to break a particularly bad case of writer’s block. Thought I might as well share those silly things if I was taking the time to write them. Maybe someone would enjoy them. Never did plan on sticking around, but found so many lovely people that I’ve come to call friends.

3- How did you pick your blog name?

It was lilyofchoices. My name + Choices because I am super creative like that with those sorts of naming things 😅 I changed it to lilyoffandoms when I left the Choices fandom for a bit. I’ve thought about changing it more times than I can count but I can’t bring myself to actually follow through on it. How do y’all’s change your blog name with each new book release? You are a crazy different breed of tumblr and you fascinate me.

4- Pull up the first post in your archive, and tell us about it!

I deleted the first one years ago. It was my first drabble. Currently, as it stands, the first thing in my archive is this post about Desire and Decorum, and it still makes me giggle.

5- How long have you been writing fanfiction?

I’ve only been writing fanfic since I joined Tumblr. I never really tried writing fanfic before that. Some nonfiction personal things before that but never anything like this world. It's been an adventure, to say the least haha

6- What is your favorite Choices book, and what is your favorite Choices book to write about?

My favorite book is probably Blades of Light and Shadow, book one, but there are plenty that are really close behind. This is also the book I’d say I enjoy writing for the most because it is my favorite book, contains my favorite LI, and has one of my favorite OCs (Maiele) in it.

Though recently, I’ve been writing more for Crimes of Passion because it's more of a challenge for me. It's a different vibe between the MC and the LI and it's one I don’t often explore so I’m here for that right now. But I have a sneaky suspicion once Blades 2 drops I’ll be back on my bullshit with that again.

7- Share the first fanfic you wrote with us. Do you still like it, or would you change it if you were writing it today?

I don’t think it exists on this site anymore. Maybe in someone’s reblog? I still have it in my files. It was an Ethan x MC drabble featuring my MC, Merida. I still like it. I’d not change it cuz I’m a firm believer in writing it and don’t look back haha.

This is it:

He swallowed the lump forming in his throat, trying to hold back the tears that were threatening to form in his eyes. There it was. He had told her. Dr. Banerji was dying and Ethan was at a loss as to what was ailing his mentor and friend. Ethan stared at the young woman in front of him and then to the floor. He cleared his throat and made a small motion to turn back into Naveen’s room but froze instantly the moment he noticed her take a step towards him.

She threw her arms around him and hugged him, wishing to take away all of his pain, all of his loneliness. Silently willing him to understand that she cared for him. Cared deeply for him and much more than she should. “Ethan. I’m so sorry,” she whispered, one hand stroked through his hair while the other grasped his neck and slowly bent his head toward her shoulders as she raised herself to her tiptoes to meet him halfway.

He tensed upon feeling her arms around him. Arms, he thought to himself, that he had imagined holding him for a number of weeks now. Ever since that night spent sitting up with her watching little baby Ethan. “Merida,” he sighed as he gradually relaxed into the embrace.

She didn’t let up on the hug, squeezing him to her just a bit more tightly. God, she had wanted to comfort him when Dolores died but she didn’t know how he would respond. Now, he was facing the possibility of another friend dying and she couldn’t help herself.

He responded to the increased pressure of her hug and tightened his own hold upon her. Finding himself tracing circles up her spine and imagining what it would feel like to move his hands to tease along the skin of her back where her pants met her shirt.

Her breath caught when she felt his hands move lower. No longer making gentle movements along her spine but increasing their pressure upon her body, nearly massaging their way lower. She brought one of her own hands around to his chest, lightly bunching his white coat in her fist to try and pull him closer to her.

A loud crash echoed down the hall. “Shit!” a construction worker cursed. The two doctors jumped back from each other both staring into each other’s eyes seeming to question if they had both felt the same in the other’s arms. She blushed slightly. “I should see to my other patients. Dr. Banerji’s condition stays between us. Understand, Rookie?” he stated, his eyes narrowing. She nodded and he turned and marched down the hall.

8- What is your favorite fic that you’ve written?

I love asking this question of others but don’t like it asked of me. I’m so bad at self-rep and advertising my wares 😂 But if I had to pick one, I’d say this one. It was so far outside my comfort zone when it came to writing that I almost abandoned it two paragraphs in. But I’m a stubborn person, and I refused to let it beat me. Plus, I had been wanting to write a noir fic for this book since it was released. Furthermore, I adore Hayden’s work too much not to gift a little something back for all the art he shares with us, so I knew I just had to make it work.

9- Do you have a fic that you didn’t expect to be well received, but it was? What about one you expected to be but found could use a little more love?

I didn’t expect last year’s Luck of the Draw fic to garner much love. Attention? Maybe. But not love and definitely not the response I got. I really enjoyed writing that one.

10- If you could write only angst, fluff, or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?

Fluff. I’m a sucker for happy-ever-afters and an endless hopeless romantic. Give me the fluff. All the fluff.

I pull a lot of what I toss into my silly drabbles from real life. Always been a believer in writing, most often what you know, and sprinkle that all with a dash of the stuff you don’t as a treat. And my life is pretty fluffy thanks to my incredible partner.

However, I do so adore angst I’m just not able to write it often because it hurts more to write. But I’ll always always read it. That pain is *chef’s kisses*

11- Do you ever recognize yourself in any of your MCs or in your writing?

Maiele, my Blades MC, is most definitely me coded. His whole personality, his choice of partner when it comes to personality, his constant flirting with said partner, his sense of humor, his lack of a filter most times, it’s all pretty much me. Gabriel, my CoP MC, is me when it comes to romantic gestures and Valentine’s Day. I may be a romantic, but I get weird when it’s aimed at me 😂

12- What element of writing do you struggle with most?

Editing. I refuse to do it. I hate it with the burning light of a thousand suns. Those of you that manage to edit your fics have all my admiration. I honestly don’t know how y’all do it. Doesn’t it just bore you to no end?

13- Do you have any neglected work you really want to finish?

I have more drafts than I care to admit. I would like to complete a series I started long ago for Ethan x Merida, but I don’t know if I’ll ever do that. I’d settle for finishing one of my drafts 😅

14- If someone you know in real life (who isn’t involved in fandoms) asked to read your work, would you let them? If yes, what would you recommend they read first?

Nope, haha, I’d not be able to do that. If I were that brave, I’d recommend this one maybe. I do so love Flynn. Or this one, mostly because I do so love the idea of Gabriel just pouting on the couch.

15 - Are there any writers (published authors and/or fanfic writers) who influenced your writing?

Not really. I mean all of em probably. I read a lot of books in a lot of genres. Mostly I use my drabbles as morning warm ups for my day job.

There are definitely fanfic writers I admire around here that encourage me to share my silly things everyday. Especially all those queer writers out there that have a rather thankless existence sometimes around here but keep sharing their stories! They are all my heroes!!

16- Which one of your stories would you most like to see as a movie/series?

Any and all of my Maiele and Tyril stories. I just love them sooooo much!!

17- Do you write original fiction?

Yes, but until recently, I wrote mostly nonfiction.

I do have a fic I began a few years back when I was still teaching. I had a student who hated their writing class, so I promised to write a short story alongside them and read it to the class like all the students had to if they gave it an honest go.

They did and so I did too, and I was asked the following year to do it again by more students and so I continued the same story. I’ve since continued that same fic, and maybe someday I’ll actually go looking to publish it.

18 - What other hobbies do you have?

I love the outdoors. Hiking, spelunking, kayaking, gardening, camping, anything and everything outdoors. My other favorite hobby, which I've done for years and years, is fencing. I still am part of a club and teach a few levels.

19 - What’s your favorite emoji?

😅 because it’s legit my state of existence at this point in life.

20: BONUS - tell us anything you’d like (if you want to).

I want to send a special shout-out to all the absolutely lovely participants of August’s writer appreciation event I hosted. I still cannot believe y’all did this for me. 😘 These are each of my favorite fics you’ve written. Thank you for making our fandom a little brighter each and every day!

@aallotarenunelma Bathed in Sunlight @coffeeheartaddict2 Moths to a Flame @karahalloway A Leviathan Surprise @jerzwriter A Mother's Journal @ladylamrian Ma Cherie @mydemonsdrivealimo Run, Run @peonyblossom We're Gonna Get Married @petiteboheme Familia @storyofmychoices Passing Shower @tessa-liam All is Fair in Love and War @trappedinfanfiction What's In a Name? Lily's Top Three Commissions can be found here:

Crimes of Passion by @javsarts

A Year of Kisses by various artists: @lethendralis-paints @cashweasel @kundool @deheerkonijn @javsarts @weetlebeetle @kollapsar @mooreaux @rosefuckinggenius @/ArtbyAinna (IG) @littlestpersimmon @callmebeem

Trystan x Noel by @rosefuckinggenius

#cfwc writer of the month #playchoices #choices the stories you play #lilyoffandoms #choices fic writers creations #choices fanfiction #choices fanart

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