#i don't think it matters but. y'know. if i was writing this story it's something i'd be keeping in mind

[marinsawakening]

I have lost 'don't be pedantic' fight once again, so: it annoys me when people straight up state fakiru is canon, because that's a gross oversimplification. There is certainly romantic subtext between Fakir and Ahiru, but unlike Rue and Mytho, they never textually get together, so how 'canon' it is depends on how you define 'canon' to begin with. Furthermore, it's also really easy to interpret the romantic subtext as platonic. This is because Princess Tutu, for the most part, distinguishes very little between romantic and platonic love. In this show the boundary between the romantic and the platonic is fluid. The exact nature of Fakir and Ahiru's relationship and feelings for each other is up to interpretation, and intentionally so. So talking about fakiru as if it's unambiguously canon without acknowledging the inherent ambiguity simplifies the show and is not an accurate representation of their relationship. Also it annoys me personally.

#my posts #ppl can do what they want and ultimately it doesn't matter #and yes it's absolutely fair to interpret the subtext as romantic and consider it canon #it just annoys me when people do so without acknowledging the ambiguity. like guys the ambiguity is why it's so good. please. #princess tutu #also not to make it weird but i'm pretty sure at least part of the reason they didn't make fakiru straight up canon #was bc ahiru does in fact turn back into a duck permanently in the ending. a completely normal duck in a now normal world #the extent of the anthropomorphization of animals in the 'normal' world in princess tutu is also ambiguous #and ahiru herself at least seems to maintain human level personality/memories/intelligence #but like. still. i'm just saying. #we're no longer in fairytale land. dating a duck might get a little weird #i don't think it matters but. y'know. if i was writing this story it's something i'd be keeping in mind

[moki-dokie]

been seeing some stuff on blue eye samurai and big yikes to nearly everyone pushing extremely western ideals onto these characters.

this is early edo period. 1600s. the japan you know now did not exist yet.

yall. please. there was NO concept of sexuality in pre-modern japan. that came with both the influx of christianity and western influence very very late in history. like, mid-1800s. (yes, there was christianity pre-1800s but it was not a widespread idea yet and wouldn't be until about the 1800s since, y'know, missionaries were routinely murdered before then)

"so and so is either bi and hasn't figured it out yet or..." no. that isn't how it worked then. nobody gave a shit what was between your legs. anyone could be attracted to anyone else. it was a little more common for male homosexual relationships to be between an adult and younger male - like many other places around the world - but two adult men could bang and love each other just as easily. relationships between women were quite common - especially since so many men were often away at war. there's tons of pornographic prints from the time depicting all manner of fun queer relationships. sex itself had absolutely no moral assignment to it. good sex was good health. it didn't matter who with. (well, social class/caste mattered more than anything else tbh but that didn't stop upper and lower class from fucking.) that isn't to say people didn't have preferences. of course they did. that is human nature. preferences arose more from physical appearance, caste, and circumstances with gender being about the last thing one would look for in a partner - romantic, casual, or otherwise. the only role in sex where gender actually mattered was for procreation.

there would be no queer awakening moment, no sudden switch flipped, no stigma to have internal conflicts about because it simply did not exist as a concept whatsoever. you were either attracted to a person or you weren't, it was that simple. gender played no role when it came to sex and sexual attraction. the japanese were lightyears ahead of western cultures in this particular area - like most cultures were before christianity came in and ruined everything with its backwards morals and strict good/evil dichotomy.

yall have got to realize queer rep will not and should not always adhere by modern western standards. there was no straight, gay, bi, or anything else of the sort. the closest they ever got was referring to roles during sex - as in who is giving and who is receiving.

i know this is mostly a made up story but it is still set within a very specific time period and culture, which should be honored and respected by not making it fit into our box. tons of research went into making this show historically accurate (albeit with some discrepancies but tbh they aren't really that huge) right down to the calligraphy writing. please please please don't whitewash the culture from these characters.

i say this mainly because without this knowledge, so many of you are going to build these characters up on a foundation they aren't meant to be on and then you'll rage about queerbaiting and bad queer rep if it isn't somehow super explicitly stated, if it doesn't match your very modern, very western ideal of what queer looks like. don't try to force this plot and narrative and characters into something they canonically and historically aren't. headcanons are a thing, AUs are a thing, fanfiction is a thing - leave your western thinking for those and let these characters simply exist as they should otherwise. this is one of those times where the queerness really does not need to be examined at all beyond what we get.

i know it can be hard to wrap your head around - sexuality is such a huge part of our identity in the western world and has slowly started to spread amongst other parts of the world in importance. but just keep in mind with these particular characters, that concept would be so very alien to them.

#blue eye samurai #i'm gonna bite people if i see complaints about queer anything in this show

[supersoakerfullofblood]

Conflict and Genre; Hurting Our Characters in Ways That Matter

If you've even only skimmed my blog, you may have noticed that I preach the importance of character and conflict above all other elements of narrative. The qualities of these dictate the qualities of the story, and by and large, every other narrative element will in part develop from these. I've written a bit about what makes strong characters here and on random other posts, but now it's time to talk conflict: what it is and how we write it.

You'll read everywhere that there are two types of conflict: internal and external. This is true but misaligned. That's kind of like saying the two types of planets are Earth and all the other planets. In reality, most conflicts are a mix of both with varying ratios of one to the other, and "internal" does a lot of heavy lifting in this dichotomy. Is it emotional? Mental? Religious? Interpersonal? A lot of stuff goes on in the human brain!

I've used conflict a bit already without defining it, so let's do so. Conflict is anything in a narrative that negatively affects a character and that character's reaction. It's a broad concept! A duel with a dragon and a tough breakup are equally valid conflicts. You might hear people advise to "hurt your MC." This is true albeit quirky and cliche. Hurt your characters, yes, but the other half of conflict, your character's reaction, is necessary to crafting a strong story. If the duel the dragon, win, and return home victorious, case closed, that's not a very interesting story; if your character goes through the breakup with healthy coping mechanisms and emotional maturity, who cares? What gives? Unless it's the end of the story, the reader doesn't want the conflict to resolve! (Or, they don't want every conflict to resolve. Some can, but always keep one fire lit.)

Your goal as a writer should be to lead your character's decisions deeper into their conflicts. Of course, this shouldn't be obvious--if characters make bad, stupid decisions, the reader will catch on. But you can use your character's flaws and vulnerabilities to make them make poor decisions or otherwise get them in binds without the reader noticing.

One example from my own work: In one of my novels, The Ghosts of Glass Lake, one character focuses on her acting career so she won't have to focus on her mother's suicide. The suicide affected the character negatively, and the focus on acting was her reaction. Obviously, this focus wasn't the healthy thing to do, which gives me as a writer room to play with and grow this conflict. While she's rehearsing, she sees her mother's ghost from time to time. When she does try to resolve this trauma, she goes about it wrong by attempting to speak with her mother via spirit box instead of, y'know, going to therapy. Other characters try to help her cope by dubiously legitimate methods. By the end of the novel, she hasn't reconciled her acting career with the effects of her mother's death, and this tension hurts the people around her.

One example from classic literature: In Virginia Woolf's To the Lighthouse, each character witnesses and thinks upon how other characters treat them and others. This novel has next to no external conflict. One character, Lily Briscoe, loves to paint and notices how the men around her talk about how women can't paint, and a second character mansplains some painting lingo to her. Most of her time in the novel is spent in these interactions or thinking about them and the greater societal shifts that caused them, and by the end of the novel, she accepts herself as a painter and completes the piece she'd been working on.

My and Woolf's examples have some commonalities and some differences. Woolf's is almost entirely internal where mine is almost entirely internal until late in the novel when it grows an external bent. In both cases, conflict is both something that negatively affects a character and that character's reaction to it. This reaction causes the conflict to deepen, which causes another reaction, and a cycle starts that will only resolve (if you want it to resolve) at the end of the narrative.

The type of conflict you write is a question of style, but certain genres historically lend themselves towards one or the other. You'll often hear "genre fiction" and "literary fiction" tossed around in literary discourse. These are two umbrella categories that if you ask me don't really exist anymore, but that's another topic for another time. So disclaimer, read below with a grain of salt, but not too big a grain, as there is truth here.

Genre fiction (fantasy, sci-fi, romance, mystery, thriller) trends towards external conflict: will they kill the dragon and save the princess? Will they win the space war? Find the culprit? Escape the killer? Literary fiction ("the classics," realistic fiction) trends towards internal conflict: how do we come of age? Recognize death? Understand love?

The dichotomy of genre/literary was created during a time when those labels weren't so liquid (here's a great article on the topic), but nowadays, great books blur these lines more than they ever had. Circe is a book with the popular conventions of Percy Jackson but is also a meditation on gender and family obligations. Station Eleven is a post-apocalyptic dystopia about how we find meaning in our everyday lives. American Gods has the trappings of any old adventure story but also questions past and present systems of belief.

And was this genre/literary conflict dichotomy ever real? I would argue no and that the strongest genre fiction also incorporates internal conflict. The Lord of the Rings is a story about Sauron and the Nazgul just as it is about the nature of power and responsibility, advancing technology, and the environment; The Left Hand of Darkness is an adventure across an ice planet but only through the lenses of gender and religion; Dune is about drugs and worms but also religious conflict, imperialism, indigenous culture, and much much more; Earthsea is an adventure through magical archipelagos and also a meditation on grief, gender norms, and reconciliation. You can say similar things as these to any great piece of genre fiction, but I don't personally think this works in reverse. Not every story needs external conflict, as Virginia Woolf shows, though even the most literary of stories will use some, even if only on accident. This is because the best stories always say something deeper about their characters than simply "they can kill the dragon"; the best stories get at what it means to kill a dragon.

So in anything you write, try adding this internal axis! If you're not used to it, try this exercise. Ask yourself what the external conflict is. Then ask yourself how your character feels about it. When you have even 5% of an answer, start writing it! Then when those feelings get that character into more or deeper trouble, ask how they feel about that, then write again. Conflict is what happens to your character as much as what your character's reaction says about them.

Asks are always open if you have any questions!

#writeblr #writing #fanfic #writing resources #writing advice #writing tips #bookblr #booklr #creative writing #writers on tumblr #writing help #writer tips

[hollowtones]

in what ways would you say bionicle influenced you the most?

Some things that come to mind

It was the first sci-fi/fantasy blend I remember seeing as a kid that wasn't just NATURE VS TECHNOLOGY and I found that really compelling. High tech mysticism and ritualism can be fun. There's a lotta stories I really like that deal with this, now that I think about it.

There were a bunch of contests where kids (fans in general, but y'know, it was mostly a series targeted at kids) could submit their builds and character ideas and it would become canonized if they won. I very vividly remember seeing these happen & having this double whammy moment of, like, "oh, stories and art and stuff are made by a lot of people working together" and "oh my god, anyone in the world can make anything".

In a story or a setting about massive world-shaking forces and heroes and conflicts and adventure, concurrent stories about your average everyday person can feel just as impactful, if not more so. "Mata Nui Online Game" is one of the earliest examples in my life of a series doing something like that in such a prominent way. I don't think it's a direct correlation, necessarily, but some of my least favourite bits of the story are the ones that generally stray further away from that.

Making years-long interconnected massive long-running story sagas makes for very cool toys and very difficult, sometimes unwieldy writing, especially if you make something that makes people compelled to ask for very granular explanations about the world and its inconsistencies. Whether that's good or bad or something else is a matter of personal taste.

It's good when the All-American Rejects get kidnapped and imprisoned.

[sigmaleph]

the "sherlock holmes wasn't allowed to show emotions until yersterday" thing was never true except to the extent the meme of it made it true

by which i mean: sherlock holmes, the character, has been out of copyright for ages. some specific stories about him only came into the public domain in the past couple years, the last ones doing so in Public Domain Day 2023, i.e. yesterday, but the character has been in the public domain for much longer[1].

the doyle estate doesn't like this very much. they want to own the character of sherlock holmes and have everyone making a sherlock holmes adaptation pay them money for it, which many of them do[2]. so when someone doesn't pay them, they threaten to sue. presumably both for the money and because they don't want anyone else getting ideas.

there's two notable cases here. one is from 2013: someone writes some sherlock holmes stories without paying for licensing, the doyle estate says "nobody is going to sell your book because we work with all the big retailers to prevent unlicensed holmes stories from being sold", they go in front of a judge and say "hey can we get a declaratory judgement that they can't sue us over this because the character is in the public domain?"

the doyle estate's argument here is that the character isn't in the public domain. because there are later stories still under copyright, and those later stories continue to develop holmes' character, the whole thing is under copyright. judge says lol no. the later sherlock holmes stories are under copyright, the character itself is not. doyle estate appeals and loses.

the second notable case is the enola holmes one, the one from where 'sherlock holmes can't show emotions or respect women' comes from. someone writes a book series about sherlock holmes' kid sister called enola holmes, it gets popular, netflix makes a movie. doyle estate smells money in the water because they also didn't pay for licensing and they sue.

since the thing they tried last time didn't work, their new angle is: this sherlock holmes adaptation is using aspects of the character that only were developed in the later, still-under-copyright stories. like uh... [loud noises of scrambling to make up a justification] having... emotions...?

this is a terribly flimsy argument, it doesn't work either, and they lose[3]. again. it was never a real constraint unlicensed sherlock holmes adaptations had to work with. it never had any power, because it was nonsense. nothing changed yesterday regarding sherlock holmes' ability to show emotions.

but the doyle estate has been making money off people thinking being sued is a hassle for a while now. their real power is people thinking they need to ask permission, and it had been decisively proven that they don't. which, i guess is why the meme bothered me. by saying 'sherlock holmes isn't allowed to show emotions until the last stories enter the public domain' you give them power they want and don't really have.

yesterday, the last flimsy justifications the doyle estate was clinging onto for dear life finally vanished. you can even rewrite the adventure of the veiled lodger to have holmes and watson make out in between every sentence and nobody can stop you. they'll try something to continue to have a reason to exist, who knows what, but it'll have no legal force and hopefully everyone will know it. maybe they'll just keep the licensing page up and hope nobody actually checks that they don't need to pay, it's worked so far.

[1] this post will focus on the US law aspect of it, which matters most for various things (mostly: dealing with companies headquartered in the US to distribute your stuff). the laws in e.g. the UK are different and there even the last few stories have been in the public domain for over twenty years

[2] their licensing page proudly displays any number of recent holmes adaptations which didn't actually have to give them a cent, but, y'know, easier to just pay them than figure it out in court.

[3] suit is dismissed with prejudice by stipulation of both parties. there's no judge actually saying 'wow that is complete nonsense' but like. enola holmes didn't have to pay licensing, is the outcome.

[ddejavvu]

Hello have you heard about the problems with fanfiction and writing it? And how people have been stealing fanfic creators works and selling them on Etsy and stuff are you as an author worried about copyright infringement?

As an author myself I’ve been pulling my fics :(

it was actually just brought to my attention last night, yes. i don't think that I am at risk seeing as I don't write many long form stories, but i am letting the general public know right now that i absolutely do not consent to my work being sold. it doesn't matter if you're honest with me about it or not, i put these stories out for people to enjoy, not for someone else to profit off of them.

as for the people stealing/selling fanfictions on etsy, i think it's deplorable and speaks to a much larger problem of frantically monetizing everything and stepping on people in the process.

this is art. this is passion. this is a hobby. people do this for fun. sometimes people do charge something like a monthly fee on patreon, or a price for a commission, yes! but for you to take someone's art that they did for fun and turn it into your own sleazy little cash grab is ridiculously sinister, and it sucks all of the joy out of the craft, and the craft only exists because people are joyous enough to engage with it. no joy = no craft.

as of right now i will not pull my fanfictions as a preventative measure, but i do absolutely stand with those authors who are going through this, and if, god forbid, it happens to me, I will be taking action.

as a friendly reminder, not only is stealing others work and selling it deplorable, but selling work that includes other people's copyrighted characters, y'know, fanfiction? can be shut down by the owner of those copyrights. Ex. J.K Rowling would absolutely froth at the mouth for the chance to penalize someone for selling -> profiting off of a work that includes her characters. Not only are you going to get in trouble for taking someone's writing and selling it, you're putting the author at risk because now their content is being monetized and someone else has a legal claim to the characters.

don't be a douche. stop selling people's fanfictions.

#mei's mail

[bi-bard]

Taylor Swift Songs That Would Describe a Relationship with Joel Miller - Joel Miller Imagine [HBO's The Last of Us]

Title: Taylor Swift Songs That Would Describe a Relationship with Joel Miller

Pairing: Joel Miller X Reader

Word Count: 2,441 words

Warning(s): fear of commitment, argument, mention of fight

Author's Note: I'm think there's a pattern of me using "cowboy like me" for stories involving Pedro Pascal characters.

Also, just a quick reminder that I write for a gender-neutral reader, so no matter the plot line, anyone can enjoy this.

**Not intentionally written in chronological order**

----------------------

Daylight

I don't wanna look at anything else now that I saw you I don't wanna think of anything else now that I thought of you I've been sleeping so long in a twenty-year dark night And now I see daylight, I only see daylight

It had all been a bit of a blur.

One moment, I was walking with Joel. We were talking about the jobs we had been assigned. Relaxed and calm and as close to normal as we could get in the current world.

The next moment, my memories get lost in a huge jumble of yelling and fighting and fear. It was all such a mess. A terrifying mess.

My next clear moment was dragging Joel down the road with me. I didn't stop moving until we had gotten inside and the door was locked.

"I'm so sorry," I mumbled as Joel sat at my dining table.

It had been my fault. At least, partially.

It was all a long and very messy story.

Joel knew the whole thing. I think that's why he was so fast to entertain the whole fight.

Not that I ever wanted him involved. In all honesty, my life would have been so much easier without ever thinking about any of my life before the outbreak... as backwards as that sounds.

"Not your fault," he muttered, looking down at his knuckles.

"Except it is," I moved to sit in the chair next to him. "This wouldn't have happened if you never met me or if I just kept my fucking mouth shut. Now, you're hurt and fuck knows what we're gonna have to deal with now. Shit, I should've been smarter about this-"

"Stop it," he cut me off. "You did nothing wrong. Your ex having his head stuck up his ass is nowhere near your fault."

I let out a sigh as my eyes closed. I shook my head before pushing myself up. I grabbed my little first-aid kit and made my way back to the table.

I grabbed his hand.

"Why'd you do that," I asked. "Nothing good can come from shit like that."

"I doubt he would've let me walk away without getting a few blows in."

I did my best to clean the small cuts along his hand.

He didn't speak up again until I was wrapping the bandage around his hand.

"Y'know...," he started and trailed off. I looked back at him. "Never mind. It's nothing."

"Tell me," I pushed.

Maybe some part of me knew what he was going to say. Maybe I was desperate to hear it out loud. I would like to think that this is why I pushed him to say it out loud.

He let out a small sigh as he seemingly weighed the consequences of his actions.

"There's something else," I continued as I placed his bandaged hand on the table. "You just told me. Why did you do it?"

"Because I love you," he admitted.

I had to bite my lip to keep my smile from getting obnoxiously big.

We had been together for a while now. We had gotten through many days in the hell that was the modern world today. But in all that time, those words hadn't found a place in our lives.

I felt like a teenager again for a few moments.

"Did you get stuck like that-"

I reached forward and smacked his arm in response. He grinned at me.

"I love you too," I said after a pause.

He looked down at the table to hide his smile.

I reached over and placed my hand on his.

For just a moment, it felt like real peace was more than just a far-off dream.

The Way I Loved You

Breaking down and coming undone It's a roller coaster kind of rush And I never knew I could feel that much And that's the way I loved you

It was all such a mess of a situation.

I had never planned on interacting with Joel again after we had separated. I knew that it would've been unrealistic to try to never see him again, but I could always turn the other way and leave.

Now, I was being forced into a situation where the only person I could interact with was Joel.

It was like the universe was attempting to play some stupid practical joke on me and I was failing to see the punchline.

I followed Joel and Ellie back to Joel's place. The only thing we could do at the time was wait for the time to pass.

I dropped my bag on the floor next to the couch before plopping on the seat that pretty much used to be designated as mine. I tried to keep an eye on Ellie without making it seem like I was staring. She went to sit by the window while Joel sat right next to me.

"Kid," I spoke up. She looked at me. "You should get some rest now. You aren't gonna get much of it later."

"Where," she asked.

I pointed behind me. "Mattress in the back."

"She's not sleeping on my bed," Joel interjected.

"I don't wanna sleep on his bed," she replied, crossing her arms over her chest. "He probably stinks."

I rolled my eyes before grabbing the spare blanket and throwing it to her. "To prevent the spread of germs... and protect against the smell. Now go."

She walked into the back without another word.

I sighed and relaxed into the couch.

"You should take your own advice," Joel muttered after a minute or two. I shook my head. "I'm serious, (Y/n)."

"I am just fine," I looked at him. "Never needed much sleep to function anyway."

He ran his hand over his face. "Always so damn stubborn."

"Can we not start this," I asked. "We've got enough to worry about without biting each other's heads off."

He sighed and looked away.

"You used to appreciate my stubbornness, anyway," I added.

I heard him chuckle. I felt a small grin pulling at the corner of my lips.

"You think we can do this?"

"Don't know," he shrugged. "I doubt we have much of a choice. Just gotta be ready to go."

I nodded. "You're scared, aren't you?"

"Scared? No. Annoyed."

"It's okay if you are," I said. "That's not a bad thing. It's just human."

He looked over at me. "Don't assume that you know how my mind works."

"For fuck's sake," I mumbled. It was my turn to run my hand over my face. "I just asked if we could avoid doing this. I was trying to comfort you. Be helpful. You have no reason to snap at me like that."

"No reason?"

"Yeah, no reason."

"What about you leaving?"

My jaw clenched. "You told me to go."

"You made no attempt to stay."

"I made an attempt every fucking day," I snapped before quickly lowering my voice, glancing back to make sure Ellie wasn't shifting around. "I fucking loved you, Joel. I fought to hold onto you with everything I had. You got scared and threw me out. After everything you promised me, after everything we did."

He didn't reply as I deflated into the couch cushion.

"Don't try to claim that I didn't try to hold on. I still feel like I'm clinging onto any part of you that I can find."

I looked out the window to the sun. I wanted to focus on anything else.

I missed him. God knows that I had missed Joel. Every day. Waking up without him was awful. Having to turn around and walk away because it was all I could do to keep myself from crumbling was hell. I just wanted what we had back.

"(Y/n)," he muttered.

I closed my eyes for a moment, not turning my head.

I felt the couch shift as he moved.

His hand touched my leg. "Please, look at me."

I turned my head back to him.

There was a pause.

One where we were sitting in silence, watching each other's reactions.

Joel seemed to hesitate for a moment before he leaned forward.

I froze for a moment as he kissed me. It was such a soft moment, yet it completely overwhelmed me. I had missed him so much that it hurt. That wasn't new. I had known about that pain for a long time now.

But what I didn't know was the way that the pain could be numbed. It was like a warmth spread through my chest, pushing away any pain, even if it was just for a little while.

I slowly kissed him back, feeling muscle memory take over as my hands reached out to touch his sides. Too long. It had been far too long since I experienced something as monumental as this moment.

I leaned back slowly, only moving far enough away to speak, "I love you."

He paused for a moment. I watched his eyes scan every part of my face. I couldn't tell if he was trying to see if I was lying or if he was trying to confirm that I wasn't some illusion his mind had created.

"I love you too," he muttered after a bit. I smiled at him.

His forehead rested against mine. We just sat there for a little while.

Through all of the chaos and the bullshit, I knew that I would always want him.

I just needed to keep a hold of him.

cowboy like me

And the skeletons in both our closets Plotted hard to fuck this up And the old men that I've swindled Really did believe I was the one And the ladies lunching have their stories about When you passed through town But that was all before I locked it down

Neither one of us planned to have that conversation that night.

It was late. Really late.

It was one of the first times that I had stayed with him for the night.

It was nice. Being around him usually was. But no matter how nice it was, I could not get myself to fall asleep.

It wasn't a new thing for me to not feel comfortable falling asleep. I didn't expect lying next to Joel to change that.

I let out a sigh as I rolled over.

My head ended up on Joel's chest as I let one of my arms fall over his torso. I didn't even realize that I had brushed a scar until he flinched. I pulled my hand away, moving my head so I could look at him.

"You okay," I asked.

"Yeah," he muttered.

"Did I hit a fresh wound or something?"

"No," he shook his head. "You just have cold hands."

"Never bothered you before."

He chuckled.

I sat up and looked at him. "Are you sure that you're okay?"

He sighed. "(Y/n)..."

"I'm just worried about you."

He didn't respond.

He made no effort to stop me as I reached forward and moved the blanket off of him. I furrowed my eyebrows at him as I tried to figure out what I had bothered.

It took me a second, but I eventually moved my hand to lightly touch a scar on his side. He tensed.

"Sorry," I muttered. I pulled my hand away. "What... What's it from?"

I felt like I was watching the scales tip in his mind. Pros and cons changing the balance.

"I'll... I'll tell you my story if you tell me yours," I offered.

He reached out and touched my leg. I placed my hand on his.

"Deal?"

He nodded. "Deal."

I grinned and shifted to get comfortable.

That's when I first found out about Sarah. He told me everything about the day of the outbreak. The panic and the crash and the soldier. I held his hand through all of it. I felt a need to commit every sentence he spoke to memory. I needed to know this all because that was the only way I would be able to properly help him.

"Your turn," he muttered after a moment of silence.

I blinked at him a few times before slowly nodding. "Right."

I took a deep breath. I felt him tapping his fingers against my hand.

"You... are not gonna like this sentence," I started. His eyebrows furrowed. "Technically... I am... married."

"What-"

"Let me get through the story first," I stopped him. "It was a while ago now. I... I was convinced that we were in love. The day that the outbreak happened, we had been inside all day. Our neighbor had broken in... he was infected. I just remember the angry look on his face. It made me sick.

"My husband and I took off. We drove for a while. I can barely remember where we were even trying to get to. I just remember ditching the car in the traffic and taking off on foot.

"We... We got cornered by one of the infected. There was this hole in the ceiling of this building. He climbed up first and I couldn't get up there and instead of helping me up... he thanked me for saving him and took off."

There was a pause between us.

"He sounds like an ass," Joel commented. I chuckled. "How did you get out?"

"I found this old bat. A solid one. I had never fought anything, really. I yelled when I hit the thing over the head. Screamed. I kept thinking about how that person had a family and friends and how many of them could be dead. After that, I hid away until I could safely get to a QZ."

Joel nodded. "Did you ever find out what happened to your husband?"

I shook my head. "And I don't want to. I hate to wish death on someone, but... he kinda did that to me... to my face, so... I hope he got his ass kicked."

"So, you're only married..."

"Because the government's been a little too busy to figure out divorce court right now," I shrugged. "And I have no desire to track the bastard down again."

"Good," he mumbled.

I furrowed my eyebrows.

"If you stuck with that guy, then we would've never happened," he explained.

"I see."

Joel pushed himself to sit up.

"I'm sorry that I didn't tell you any of this before," I said.

"Can't say that I'm too upset," he replied.

He slowly leaned over and pressed his lips to mine. I slowly kissed him back, grinning against his lips.

Maybe, just maybe, there was something that I could let myself hold onto in this shitty world.

---------------------

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Some Original Characters

#joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller imagine #the last of us x reader #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us imagine #pedro pascal x reader #pedro pascal imagine #pedro pascal fanfiction #imagine #fanfiction #x reader

[donnas-dollface]

requested by: (@mraes) Heyy i hope you’re doing good! I just found ur account and lemme just say…ur writing is so good. My two special interests rn are actually resident evil and rdr2 lol so this is perfect :)

I’d like to request your take on Donna with a s/o who is very sociable, gets along with everyone. Maybe they accompany Donna to a meeting for the first time and end up with a few new friends (as well as invitations to hang out) by the end?

a/n: i say this time and time again, that's a sweet thing to say thank you ejkaejklf and not a problem! apologies for the late publishing! i wasn't quite sure if you wanted a full little story or headcanons so i went with the latter. of course i'm able to do the other which way if you'd like! :)

characters; donna beneviento x reader

Meeting the Family;

Donna is a very private person. So her siblings finally piecing together that she has a lover takes awhile. An extra toothbrush? Oh, it's probably just a spare. Hm, this definitely looks like way too many dishes for a one person household. And once they do, they're just like "WHO?? WHAT THE HELL, THE DOLLMAKER PULLED BEFORE ME?" They're bombarding her with questions, some she'll quietly answer, and some that are more invasive Angie is snapping back. 

She was a little... hesitant about bringing you to meet her adoptive family. But she relented, because sooner or later they would've probably barged into her manor to meet you themselves the moment an opportunity came up. They were curious, and it soothed her soul just a little bit. 

"I would like to meet the person that's lucky enough to grace my little sister's eyes." "As would I!" 

"OH BUG OFF, ONLY DONNA'S ALLOWED TO SEE THEIR FACE!" - a certain homicidal doll. 

Very well then. So she arranged to bring you along to the next family meeting. Mother Miranda was aware, and truly she was intrigued about meeting Donna's little secret lover. Would you be quiet like the veiled lady? Or something entirely opposite?

When Donna quietly told you she'd made arrangements with her family for you to meet them, she couldn't believe how enthusiastic you were. You'd heard about them, y'know being the 4 lords and all, but it didn't terrify you. You just hoped Mother Miranda would approve of you dating one of her beloved daughters. Andddd that Lady Dimitrescu wouldn't slice you to ribbons if she found reason to disapprove of you.

Donna just squeezed your hand, sensing your slight nervousness. "... No matter what they think, I love you either way." It wasn't until you stood next to Donna, approaching the Dimitrescu Castle that you got cold feet. You were excited, but felt ready to yak. The doll noticed how you kinda faltered in your steps and tugged on your shirt sleeve. 

"Oh c'mon, don't tell me you've got the quakes now! You were so excited when you brought back that stupid pie!" "HEY I DIDN'T WANT TO SHOW UP EMPTY HANDED?!"

Meeting the Dimitrescus;

alcina is just quietly watching from behind the curtains of one of the higher level windows if I'm being honest. she's just studying you, like a cat does to a stranger. 

Donna again squeezes your hand, mumbling "I'd never make you do something you don't want to do. We can go back if you'd like.." but god you're determined. "No, it's alright, I'll be fine." 

mkay then. 

Alcina is already at the door when you're just about to use the giant knocker. Donna is definitely taken aback, because the Countess usually takes a while to open the door or one of the many maidens does it. 

Surprisingly, you don't recoil, instead giving a very chirpy "Good afternoon Ms. Dimitrescu'' with a slight head bow. Meanwhile Donna is very much holding her breath behind you with Angie being uncharacteristically quiet.

She looks you up and down, and responds. "Good afternoon…?"

"Y/N L/N. I hope it's alright I'm attending with Donna today?"

"If it's alright with Mother Miranda, I suppose it is. Come in, it's starting to get cold."

Donna is proud of you oh my god. She breathes finally and picks up her companion, going before you while you enter last. 

Ah, you're the gentleman type of person. Good. 

"Lord Moreau and Heisenberg haven't arrived yet. Typical, they're both morons. Anywho, please make yourselves at home."

She turns to look at you, but you're busy admiring the grand decor. Like seriously everything is so tidy and perfectly placed.

"Miss Dimitrescu, did you arrange all of this?" 

"The decor? Oh no, I designed how I wanted it to be, and had the maids arrange it."

And thus begins the rambling. You and Alcina are talking about little trinkets she has, their origins, the paintings? Donna and Angie are stunned. But she's pleased, Alci seems to enjoy your company.

Suddenly the swarm of flies appears. "MOTHER, CASSANDRA IS BEING A NUISANCE!"

"I AM NOT, I ONLY TOLD YOU- oh?"

you look at Donna, who is tilting her head. Her nieces (?), usually keep to themselves when there's a meeting. Perhaps Alcina had notified them of a newcomer. 

You look back and see 2 young women looking at you, one with blond hair, the other with brown(black?) hair. Their faces are messy, presumably dried blood around their mouths. You can see that their noses are inhaling… are they smelling you? 

"Ahem, girls, we have guests. This is Cassandra and Bela, my daughters. There's a third, Daniela, but I'm unsure of where she is."

"um… nice to meet you. I'm Y/n-"

"Ah, you're Donna's lover!"

"Speak up, it's not like we're gonna bite."

"..."

Angie was about to open her mouth at that remark but a nudge from Donna held her back. she wasn't ready to go back to her time out corner. 

After a bit of awkward glancing, you took note of a book in Bella's hand, internally debating whether it would be appropriate to make conversation with one of Dimitrescus ' daughters. 

"Do you like to read?" 

"..."

"..."

"Oh please, she's a bookworm. Goes into the library, she never comes out. Practically lives there."

"Better than being a barbarian and running around like a … what was that expression? something with a chicken with no head…"

"A headless chicken?"

"Yes! It's better than being a barbarian and running around like a headless chicken with a sickle in its hand!"

"Hey now!"

"Enough! You two bicker like wild dogs. Now go find Daniela, she's been awfully quiet."

"Hmph. Yes mother."

You were quietly giggling, making note to bring by a few novels for Bela. You stood next to Donna, and slipped your hand in her's. Alcina's eyes flickered to this motion, and thus her own interrogation began. 

"So tell me Y/N, how long have you been with my sister?"

"I presume you treat her right? If I ever get the notion that you've mistreated her we'll have a new wine on the market."

"Alcina."

"I'm just giving them a warning."

"Warning or are you jealous T-Rex?"

"Can it, firewood."

Whilst Alcina does like you, she's more so overprotective of her adoptive sister. She's got a fragile mind, and she doesn't want her to get hurt. But she's assured that you take good care of Donna, and Donna does the same. 

suddenly all heads jerk to the doors, where a booming voice calls out. "Ladies and gentlemen! We now have Karl Heisenberg!"

Meeting Heisenberg;

When the doors blew open, he saw you holding Donna and Alcina glaring him down.

"Stupid Man-thing! If you ruined my doors I'll have your goddamn head!"

"Try it you super-sized bitch!"

You puzzledly look at Donna, and Angie pipes up rather a little too gleefully.

"OOOO this is gonna be a good one! Fight fight fight!"

"Angie."

Donna silently shakes her head and replies to your confused and concerned reaction.

"There's nothing much to worry about, this happens nearly every meeting."

You give a quiet O, and turn to look back at the two, who seem to be in a staring match of sorts. Suddenly, he presumably glances in your direction, and clears his throat. 

"Ah! You must be the mysterious lover we've all been curious about. Tell me, what's your name?"

"Y/N."

"Y/N? Well Y/N, I'm assuming you've met the Big Woman. And I'm Karl Heisenberg."

With that, he stuck his hand out for you to shake. 

"Egh, I wouldn't dare to shake that thing's hand, you can't be sure of where it's been."

Okay that finally set off Karl. You simply blinked and the next moment, there was metal pointing to the back at Alcina, who had unsheathed some long claws. You gawk in amazement, while Donna is simply tugging you behind her. 

"If you two are just going to bicker, i think Y/N and I will take our leave."

The two's heads crank as they look at her, back at each other, and finally they grumble and Karl settles to give Alcina the middle finger. 

"... So Lord Heisenberg, Lady Dimitrescu, Lady Beneviento, and isn't there one more?"

"Ah, you mean the moronic freak. Yes, Moreau. Fair bit of warning, he does have a strong stench, so don't let him hug you."

Angie presumably if she had face muscles, would've been wrinkling her nose. "And they never gave us that heads up."

"I'm pretty sure you can't smell jack shit."

"That doesn't matter!"

You were still standing behind Donna, who was seriously gripping your hand. The poor thing thought her siblings would've been more well behaved but now she's kinda antsy.

she doesn't want you getting hurt.

Karl goes quiet from his bickering with the doll for a bit and then huffs.

"I'll be on my best behavior from now till after the meeting."

"Ha, I'd like to see that."

"And you will!"

(I'm making this a two parter, hope that's alright!)

#requests #🧹sweep sweep #resident evil village #resident evil 8 #re 8 #re 8 village #resident evil 8 x reader #re 8 x reader #donna beneviento #donna beneviento x female reader #donna beneviento x reader #angie beneviento #donna re8 #donna and angie #angie resident evil 8 #angie re8 #alcina dimitrescu #re8 alcina #countess alcina #lady alcina #karl heisenberg resident evil village #karl heisenberg

[nerves-nebula]

so, my original question was this:

how do you go about writing topics like abuse, sa, etc., because i had thoughts about adding these sort of things in a storyline of mine, but i'm not sure how i would do it without being seen as somehow offensive. i want to do it mainly for awareness purposes, definitely not to romanticize it or justify it, as well as vent a bit personally (thats more with the abuse topic though)

so i was just wondering how you think of it, is all. thanks!

this is really long and meandering so. under the cut. also, might be a lot of typos, i'm not re-reading all of this to make sure :P

i mean well. yknow. ok so like. i'm not really an expert here, cause I mainly write stuff how I'd want to read it, and there's a lot of people who do NOT want to read abuse stories the way that I write them and that's fine. me personally? I like getting into the graphic bits. I remember what happened to me, for the most part. I also like getting into the complicated feelings (like for example the weird kinks you can get from trauma) but I mostly avoid posting that stuff here because. well. because of a lot of reasons, mainly that people actually do not enjoy when abuse survivors aren't chaste about the ICKY parts of their abuse heahfshaf.

BACK TO THE POINT THO: the main thing that i've usually seen other survivors get annoyed at is the sa & abuse being used for shock and nothing else. like, the victims of the abuse not mattering or being used as fodder. and also, victims not having much of a life outside of their abuse.

I know that's rich for me to say cuz I can't stop abusing my characters and I tend to not have much time to do things other than what I'm REALLY interested in- so to a lot of you guys my characters can seem like they're kind of just going through it 24/7, but that's not really how I see them since y'know, I see the whole thing in my head.

but I've noticed that myself and others like it when abused characters also have like, other shit going on. imagine that, I know. A lot of people want characters who's abuse is kind of tangential to them. (not my preference, but this is something I've seen a demand for)

in a way I have a similar thing going on, though I frame it more as "let them get silly with it" hah. As in, I like when characters who are abused or sexually assaulted get to also be silly (editing this to be more clear: It's nice when a character experiences a full range of emotions & experiences. or has a normal day, or does things completely unrelated to their abuse. it feels jarring to some people but the reality of living with abuse is often jarring, as i'm sure you're aware. because one moment you're having a normal ass day at school or something and the next you're at home experiencing things that people consider too horrific to even talk to you about. so a kid hanging out with their friends being a normal silly kid can go a long way to making what happens to them feel more real, at least to me)

I also like it when abuse victims don't react in pretty ways to their abuse. when they get messy with it, when it makes them mean and preemptively lash out at people, when they fight back and aren't innocent. and maybe they never were innocent (which doesn't mean they deserved abuse, but a lot of people subconsciously believe that if you are a bad enough person then your abuse doesn't count or it doesn't matter as much)

one of my favorite characters when I was younger was (and still kinda is) Yuudai from Sakana. for a lot of the comic Yuudai was a genuinely mean person. Sakana is a comedy comic tho, so of course things don't get too dark for too long and people mostly ignored or just scowled at his jabs, but the main character was genuinely scared of him. So if you think about it, you really wouldn't wanna be around Yuudai irl because he was NOT fun or nice haha. long story short Yuudai's got some personal stuff going on, including (spoilers) an emotionally abusive ex who tells him on screen that no one else can stand being around him because he's so mean.

AND THE THING IS,, that's not entirely a lie??? like, it's a lie that no one else could ever love Yuudai, but it's not entirely untrue that Yuudai is kind of mean. which is what makes it effective. it also makes it clear that not all people who are mean are abusive. which i like.

OK THAT WAS A HUGE TANGENT so let me try to actually give some advice.

FOR ME, writing about abuse is akin to writing about, for example, race. in that you really do need to know why it's wrong to be racist in order to make an anti-racism story. You need to go deeper than just "we're all people" and really understand the malicious and insidious history of race science. you need to internalize that race, as it's thought of in modern day america, is NOT REAL. it's completely constructed. there is no genetic difference between people that you can figure out based on the color of their skin and their facial features.

you need to understand that all of that was made up and pushed by a lot of people to justify a lot of things. and you need to understand, at least generally, the state of various races oppression, and the histories there too.

it's like that, to me. which isn't even to say that you need to understand the exact histories, just the general mechanisms, y'know? (unless you're making a story about a specific kind of racism in which case you kind of do need to look into stuff. like, at least listen to activists and the like)

but like, you don't have to study every case of abuse to write about abuse haha. you just have to understand a lot of the contemporary issues abuse victims have. yknow, the reasons people get abused, the reasons people can't LEAVE abusive situations. how abusers get away with it. which is easy enough to do cuz the internet means you can listen to abuse victims by like, category or something. and that's another thing, not every kind of abuse is the same.

for me, I like expressing the feelings of abuse victims. especially parental relationships. including stuff like how much they might love or have loved their abuser. rage, pain, pleasure, adoration, helplessness, denial, the addictiveness of being given a sliver of praise, or the horror of living with a monster who does nothing but hurt you :D! the slow realization that someone who was supposed to love you absolutely does not. or at least, they don't love you in a way that's good.

umm this has all been very meandering and i'm not sure if its been helpful, so here's a very meandering bullet point list of things i try to do (these are NOT requirements for a good story or anything, they're just rules i follow for myself so I don't lose to the plot. you can and absolutely should do things outside of this these are my personal thoughts I'm spewing over here)

at no point should the narrative imply that the abuse was justified or necessary (for example, imagine a narrative where a magical child is abused and that abuse is said to be the reason they can control their magic instead of hurting people. in the broken earth trilogy, multiple characters with magic-earth abilities have their hands broken as children to prove they can control themselves. we're told this is for their benefit, but we later on see a small island that raises their magic babies just fine without hurting them, so the idea that this systemic abuse is necessary is disproven by the narrative. this is cause that's how it is IRL, corporal punishment has never made someone more disciplined or emotionally regulated and that's just a fact)

Focus on the abuser can be extremely minimal to extremely extensive. it really depends on the story you're telling, but how much you focus on the abuser vs the victim can majorly shift the tone & what the story is about so it's important to consider this going in (in Switch by A. S. King, the abusive sister who's fucked up the entire family isn't even named. She's a hole in the narrative. Switch is largely about taking the time to heal from something bad once it's over, so this make sense. in the Broken Earth trilogy, one of the main POV characters is both a victim and perpetrator of some pretty extreme abuse. I'd say that abuse wise, the broken earth trilogy is more about trying to fix things the best you can, moving on, and trying to be better, even if it hurts)

There are a lot of different ways to react to abuse and it will change you (I would recommend looking into different people's experiences, or common ways people react to abuse. a lot of people aren't aware they were abused until it's long over. or, if you're lazy like me, you can mostly just draw from your own experiences hah. but if you're gonna like, for example, write an entire cast of people who've been abused, it can be good to get more variety in there. some people react in ways that are completely incompatible with other people. which can be fun in fiction, cause then it gets messy :D)

What are the other environmental factors? (race, gender, class, sexuality, species, etc. these can all play a fun role in how someone reacts to being abused)

What's the point/Why does this matter/Why am I even making this? (I ask this about all my stories, sometimes it's just "because I want to share it" and sometimes it's like, "because I would want to read it" but it can also be more high concept, like for example, there are a lot of stories out there about the cycle of abuse and how abuse victims can end up reenacting things that happened to them because they've just internalized it as normal behavior.

don't forget to have fun :) (fictional characters are toys and if you're not getting silly with it in a fulfilling way then whats the point. loosen up a bit! it doesn't have to be a PSA!)

I would worry less about being offensive and more about being genuine tbh. really, even if i don't like the way abuse is written about sometimes, it hurts way more to see an author just using Tragic Shit as fodder. abused characters as nothing but place holder NPC's to be saved with no thought put into how they feel about it. that shit sucks.

if anyone else wants to add something more concise or important, or like, ACTUAL writing advice, PLEASE do. I'm only one person and I'm not even that good of a writer. i only write because if i don't then I'll die.

#nnstuff #ask #asks are sweethearts #abuse tw #sa tw

[lazaruspiss]

i enjoy a lot of your metas and i'm curious, what is your opinion on writers who aren't familiar with or care about canon?

it depends on if you're asking about fan content or actual DC writers. with fan content i do think its fine for people to engage with content however they want to. i don't really like content that contradicts established canon, but i do defend its right to exist in the first place. OOC fanfic doesn't usually* effect already existing canon.

adding a read more bc i started to rant a bit. TLDR: fan content creators can do whatever they want. separately, i really wish DC held itself to a higher standard. both as a company and in terms of the actual comics that they publish.

(*i say usually, because a lot of newer canon content has felt... off. like DC took a short shallow look at how fandom simplifies characters and decided that must be what people actually want to see/what will sell more product. never forget that DC is a corporation, not an actual person who cares about the artistic integrity of what they're producing. and many of the actual creators of the comics they sell are mistreated and beholden to exec decisions based off of. y'know. marketing.)

in canon comics. it sucks. Talia is the most prevalent example of a character who was rewritten by someone who refused to read or engage with any of her preexisting canon. but it comes up a lot that sometimes a character is used by or given to a writer who doesn't care or might just straight up hate the character they're supposed to be writing. I have characters that I don't like and don't really care to learn about, but if i decide that i want to write something with them involved i consider it a matter of personal integrity to at least try to understand the characters already established personality and background.

it doesn't matter when it's independent fan content, or even a published AU series, but for mainline comics it is important to account for the fact that most of these characters have been around for decades and you shouldn't, nor do you need to, just make shit up about them.

also! an idea that i try and maintain for any kind of story is that every character is somebody's favorite. i think i got that from someone talking about how every pokemon is some kids favorite, but i think it can be a useful framing for a lot of fictional content. especially with something as widely known as DC, the chances are that much higher that every character you see is going to be someone's favorite. and i want to be kind to that. like, i don't care about Punchline in the slightest. i'm still putting off this fic with her involved because i want to learn her character a bit first to at the bare minimum acknowledge that there are people who might love her. i don't want to explicitly contradict some major trait of hers just bc i don't like her.

again, i don't really care if fans don't go through the trouble. but it's upsetting when DC itself doesn't seem to require any understanding of their characters in what they publish. in older comics, even when i think certain comics are poorly written, i can still see when the writer cares about the character they're writing. but so much of the newer stuff just feels hollow to me. i dunno, i stopped reading any n52 stuff bc of it so maybe it'll improve and i just won't notice.

#asks #anon

[not-poignant]

Hello! I read some of your reposts about importance of comments and that any can be usefull to self evaluation as author. My question - is it weird and uncomfortable if people bring too many personal problems commenting your fics? Like, do you distant yourself out from comments that bring a lot of person's drama, does it feel uplifting in the end, if comment is a lot about reader's not so happy history? Can you still feel joy from that kind of comment?Thanks for unswer if you do.Have a nice day!

Hi anon,

So, this is kind of complex. I would say the vast majority of people don't overshare at all, and when they are sharing from their lives, it's in a way that makes complete sense and is very 'contained.' I can tell they're not expecting emotional labour from me, and that they're sharing because they found a point of resonance between themselves, the story, the situation, or the character/s, or a combination of all of the above.

And like, that's a part of why I write, y'know? I want to strike up that sense of resonance in folks who relate to these characters, so when people share that it has resonated, that's like... purposeful and meaningful to me. I feel like I've made a connection. I also sometimes feel sorrowful - like when someone explains they relate to Efnisien because of abuse they've also experienced, or when someone explains that they relate to a character's chronic illness because of their own.

But I can also generally tell through tone and language that the commenter doesn't expect labour from me, they're speaking their pain into the world in a way that's like 'this is me, and here's this character, and we both share this thing in common.' In a perfect world, none of us would know what this kind of pain is like. In this world, a lot of us do, and we get to feel less alone when we read stories where we feel seen.

And that is, by and large, the general experience when readers share something personal that they resonated with in a comment.

That being said, I do also maintain very strong boundaries with people's personal matters, because I'm not someone who's 'healed and above all my own issues who is sharing what I've learned to people still going through it' I am someone who is still going through it. And often folks have no idea what kind of day I'm having or how I'm feeling when they comment, and so... on the very very rare occasion I do get a comment that feels like it's pushing for some kind of emotional labour that's beyond what I can give... I will not give that labour. I will acknowledge their comment, thank them for reading, and not...give energy I don't have to spare.

And like, honestly, 99 times out of 100, everyone is very respectful of that and even caring towards it.

I can probably count on like two hands, in ten years, the commenters who I felt had become very self-focused or what I felt was over-sharing in comments in a way that sort of...was no longer about me or the story, where they just treated the comment section as a diary instead. In those cases I tend to leave very brief acknowledgements, as a kind of 'I see this, I know this is painful, but this is not my lane, and I don't want this to be my lane.' But a more compassionate version of that.

If anything, the most personal stories, anon, come to me in Asks that are sent via Tumblr, off anonymous, so I can reply privately. These folks are usually very...aware that I might not be in the space to hear them, and are frankly the most 'if you don't have time or energy to reply please don't pressure yourself', so I feel no burden or obligation and that usually makes it easier to reply in my own time.

The ones that come to me via anon, I only reply to selectively, and that depends on a few factors. Some things are extremely personal and frankly I'm not comfortable replying because even if I did it would be to say 'I think a professional needs to handle this.' I've also - very rarely - had a few people do things that were not cool, to manipulate me into caretaking them, usually because they want the comfort feeling that one of my characters creates, and then from there thinks 'Pia made that character so they can give that to me instead.' This doesn't happen often, but it's very distinct when it does.

But that's rare! Super rare!

It might be that others read the comments of folks in fics and think 'I would never share those kinds of details about my life like that' and that's fine for them - but some folks do need to share, and want to feel seen because they felt seen during the fic, and I have no problems with that in general.

I have learned so so much about the human condition, about the fact that things that I thought literally no one would relate to are things that actually a lot of people relate to, etc. through the grace and vulnerability of the folks who comment on my fics with personal anecdotes or even just 'I've been through something like this, and I thought you showed it well / it's a painful thing to go through.'

I know a lot of authors wouldn't have much patience with that maybe? I don't know. I'm literally writing trauma recovery, mental illness and chronic illness, queerness and neurodivergence, and people going through tough times. I don't think an author ends up writing that stuff if they're generally not looking to make a connection with fellow folks who have also gone through some tough times! And even if I can't be those people's support systems, I think all of us having these ephemeral moments of effectively saying: 'Same bro' through the comments, is pretty powerful, and magical, actually.

Caveat: If a person brings personal problems into my fics with the expectation that I will then fix them, that's something I don't really do and don't enter into. That's where my boundaries are firm. Sometimes I won't even acknowledge those kinds of situations at all. If a person reads something for free and then seeks to obligate a complete stranger into being their support or therapist, there's a much bigger issue going on there that isn't my business, and I generally will maintain significant distance in those situations.

TL;DR - I don't think I'd write these stories if I didn't want to make connections with folks who have also gone through some hard times. The vast majority of people who bring up personal stuff aren't necessarily bringing me 'joy' - but I don't just look for joy in the comments, anon, I also look for connection, resonance, moments of feeling less alone, and sometimes that's not easy, but it's still very special. As for the very rare occasions where someone wants me to personally hold their hand, I step back, because a) that's not my job, and b) I don't think folks realise sometimes just how much proverbial hand-holding I need as well lol - I might sound like I have my shit together, but I do not.

#asks and answers #pia on writing #pia on fanfiction #honestly i think like #collectively my 'readers' are some of the best people in the whole fucking world #they're often insightful and deeply attuned to people's issues #they're usually dealing with some shit #they're often recovering people pleasers and/or people #trying to find value in themselves by following characters who are learning not to hate themselves #they're people who want to believe in hope amongst messy lives #while there's always exceptions #the folks i've met via my writing have been some of the best folks i've ever met in my whole life #and even if i only ever know them by their usernames #i'm grateful to have gotten to know them at all #if someone tells me they have a surgery and my fic is helping #i'm relieved and i hope they recover well #if someone tells me they've had a hard year in health #i'm sad on their behalf and hope they can find comfort #idk it's just dsalkfjdsa it's just what it is i guess

[good-wizard]

Hey guys I've decided to share one of my most favorite writing tips with you that I think can heavily apply to wizardblr!

This is something my mentor taught me that may seem a little basic, but it's still important to remember!

Do not change your story or characters for anyone!

Your stories and characters should always follow the ideas you have for them, and you shouldn't allow others to make you change them for their comfort. No matter what.

It heavily impacts the uniqueness of your story and characters when you make yourself change it for others, when you do that it causes your brain to scramble to find something new and it most often isn't going to be as good as what you initially had.

I've fallen into this trap before where I think about how others feel before writing something I want to write, and it totally messes me up because I'm making myself hold me back!

The way this contributes to wizardblr is that sometimes people won't like the lore or the plot you have for your characters. In that moment you have to choose between doing something you want, and something someone else wants. The answer to this dilemma is to Do what you want! This online space is meant for expression and doing what you want. I personally often use my characters to deal with issues I'm dealing with IRL or to express things that I don't get to irl! That's why it's so important to stay true to what you want to do because it can help you express your creativity, heal from negative things irl and also just lets your brain brain a bit as an escape from reality, y'know?

So please stay true to your ideas for your characters and stories, it may make people unhappy but overall if it's best for you that is what matters!!

Anyways thank you for coming to my Ted talk!

#wizard posting #ooc #wizard #pondering the orb #wizardblr #writing #ooc posts #this isnt about anything #just repeating a thing i learned from my writing mentor

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Personality through quote

Thanks @willtheweaver here, @elsie-writes here, @somethingclevermahogony here, and @dyrewrites here.

Rules: write a quote from your character(s) following a given prompt

Tagging @mk-writes-stuff @little-peril-stories @ohnomybreadsticks @oh-no-another-idea @sarahlizziewrites @sleepywriter00 @mysticstarlightduck @emilynotfound @elsie-writes + OPEN

Your prompt: "What's a song/type of music that you can listen to when you need comfort?"

Due to these building up, they're under the cut

Will's prompt: Go-to meal when they are sick

Lexi: "When I'm in Ceteri, it's a classic grilled cheese. Alium though has this weird purple soup that's made of...I actually don't know what it is, but it's super good and totally effective."

Maddie: "Pia makes really good soup. I think that usually helps when I'm sick."

Ash: "Mary makes some good Texas toast. I'll take that, maybe dip it in some soup."

Gwen: "Does tea count as a meal? Because that's what I have when I'm sick."

Robbie: "My mom makes good stew and very healthy meals when we're sick. She knows exactly what to do whenever we don't feel well."

Akash: "Literally everything Mrs. Stafford makes. Everything."

Jedi: "I really enjoy hinoniku, which is like bulgogi from your side of the portal, but the meat is from the firefox. I would eat that when sick because of what it reminds me of."

Carmen: "I guess Atsila's family made good meals with unibison and bearfalo meat. They made a good stew."

Elsie's prompt: A quote about love

Lexi: "I guess love is... I guess grounding? Is that what it's called? It makes me feel good. Like things are normal. If I'm having some anxiety attack, if someone is just...there, I can usually calm down.

Maddie: "Hm. I guess the small things people do can be love. Like Kelsey making me Wilfredo. Wasn't for my birthday or anything. Or Lexi watching sci-fi with me, playing Mario Kart even though she always loses."

Ash: "Whenever someone doesn't put so much pressure on you to do something specific. Be something specific. Love is that, I think. When they like you for you."

Gwen: "Love is something that transcends time and space. It will never stop - not for anything. I love spending time with my friends, but I'd love them no matter what. Akash and I are in a long distance relationship, but we see each other over the weekends. That doesn't matter to me. We still are together."

Robbie: "There are people I can't stop thinking about. That are on my mind all the time, y'know? It's like they physically are there, in my mind. If my mind was, like, a building, they'd have rooms to themselves, completely dedicated to who they are. That's kinda how I see it. Does that make sense? I'm probably not making sense."

Akash: "I feel like love is knowing you can always go to them. For refuge, y'know? Knowing they'll accept you and protect you. And you right back at them."

Jedi: "Love is sinking into warmth. It feels warming to be with someone. No matter how horrible you feel, being with them is comforting."

Carmen: (we'll pretend you actually got her to answer this question) "It's not being afraid to let them see you at your worst."

C's prompt: A quote about a reoccurring dream

Lexi: "I have dreams about all of my friends. Often, we're at Main Event, bowling. Getting pizza. Laser tag. A lot of stuff like that. Sometimes it gets weird, like a character appears, or someone I haven't seen in years. Sometimes Shelby is there. Usually I... I feel like I'm giving too much information, but I always get so angry when I see her. I've thrown a bowling ball at her a few times. Every time I've woken up, completely shaken. Sometimes I'll get a nightmare in the middle of a dream where everyone suddenly vanished. [Pause] I've spoken way too much about this."

Maddie: "My dreams are usually weird and nonsensical. I don't think any of them reoccur. A lot of them are combinations of things I'm watching. A lot of superheroes or Star Trek."

Ash: "Sometimes I have this dream where I'm like...not physically there. Like I'm an observer from above. It's unsettling. Nothing too bad, but it's just weird, I guess."

Gwen: "I've had a recurring dream topic where I meet my evil twin, though none have been the same. I was actually a twin. Not identical, but my sister died in the womb. I always was scared of those episodes where there's an evil clone or twin, so I have dreams where she lived and became evil. Not sure if this is a nightmare or not. Sounds silly saying it out loud actually (laughs)."

Robbie: "Okay, I have this dream where I'm running through the city. I don't actually know what city. It looks like Metropolis from Superman: The Animated Series. Y'know, the 90s one? But like, I know it's not Metropolis. I think it's New York, but I've never been, so that doesn't make sense. Anyways, I'm running through the city, and there are cars pulled off to the side of the road while people are screaming and running. There's this destruction going on behind me. I turn around, and coming through the buildings is this giant inflatable duck floaty. Like one little kids would take to the pool. I dunno, man. I don't even have a fear of them."

Akash: "Bro, most of my dreams take place in Walmart. WALMART. What does that even mean?? It doesn't make any sense! There's never the same thing happening. I'm just constantly in Walmart."

Jedi: "My insomnia causes vivid dreams whenever I get to sleep. It is not always terrible, but at the worst, I do have dreams where I am responsible for my mother's death. I know that is not the case, but it appears I may have some guilt left over from it."

Carmen: [pause, pause, pause] "I am not going to answer a question about what goes on in my subconscious. What kind of sick person do you have to be to ask that?!"

Amber's prompt: A quote about someone they miss

Lexi: "Everyone I left behind in elementary school. Daniella, Laurie, Ryan, Amber. It sounds silly, since I wasn't particularly close to them, but they were my friends. I still follow them on social media, but I haven't exactly met up with them in a while. I need to change that."

Maddie: "I dunno. Brycen pre-bully? I was friends with him for a time. I don't miss him but I miss the person he was."

Ash: "Sometimes I find myself missing Shelby or even Frank. They were awful, but... Shelby did make me feel like I found someone I could talk to. And Frank was a second dad for a little bit until he turned out to be a jerk. I dunno. It's complicated."

Gwen: "My cat. Poor thing was suffering and we had to put her down. I miss her so, so much. And even if we get another one, it won't be the same. It won't be her."

Robbie: "I miss Lalika, Akash's mom. She was such a good lady, like another mother or maybe an aunt. I knew her most of my life. How could I not miss her?"

Akash: "More than anyone, I miss my mom. I didn't get enough time with my dad to know him, but... Mom I did. And... I just wish I got more time with her, y'know?"

Jedi: "I miss seeing my sister Kirstie all the time. We were very close as children. And my mother.... Eomma did everything to keep me safe. I will never be able to repay that."

Carmen: "Of course I miss Atsila. I knew her for a while." [She's holding back more]

TSP intro

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

#the secret portal #tsp #teaspoon #my ocs #oc tag game #writing tag game #personality through quote #lexi morgan #maddie morgan #ash hathaway #gwen amante #robbie stafford #akash singh #jedi moon #carmen asghar #writers on tumblr #writing community #writers of tumblr #writing on tumblr #writeblr #writeblr community

[certifiedmattl0ver]

Love Across the Miles

summary: University!Matt and University!y/n are high school sweethearts. Ever since they graduated and set sail for their different universities, they hadn't communicated as much as a healthy couple should.

warnings: none! just slight angst and fluff

a/n: this is my first story dont judge por favor

It had been a good week since Matt and y/n had spoken. Of course, both subjects in prestigious universities like theirs didn't have time to goof around. Especially since this is their first year. Matt had been accepted into Stanford University, and y/n at Cambridge.

The two lovers had previously tried to make up time to call each other, but because of the time zones and endless amounts of assignments, they couldn't make ends meet. The UK is 7 hours ahead of California wasn't something they had put much thought into.

They both knew that one or even both would have to sacrifice either their sleep or their work to make this relationship work out.

"y/n i don't think i can afford to miss another due date, I really need to finish this or I'm done for.''

''just finish it when we end the call. we're supposed to have a 15-minute talk and update each other on things every other day. but it's been a whole week Matt. We promised we wouldn't drift from each other.''

''So you want me to fail? is that what you're saying right now?''

''no matt i-''

''because it seems to me that you don't care whether I fail or not. and why is it always e that has to stay awake past 12 am to be talking to you? I have a life too y'know. I've got shit to do and my professor will not take any bullshit from me.''

A tear rolled down your cheek. Matt had never acted like this before. was he really always staying up that late for you? how had you not realized the bags around his eyes and the constant stress he displayed?

''r-right...sorry I wasn't thinking. I should've realized earlier. I just didn't want us to fall apart. but I do care Matt. I care a lot whether you wanna believe it or not. goodbye.'' you say with a shaky voice.

''y/n no wai-''

you end the call before anything else can be said. you put your phone down beside your pillow and start sobbing, thinking back to high school when you and Matt would sneak out and have fun with each other. 'what happened to us' you think to yourself. after a while, you get a message from Matt.

It's an apology. the message read:

''Baby I'm so so sorry. I've just been so stressed out lately. my professor's been on my ass for days and I'm just really frustrated about all of it. I didn't mean to take it out on you. I know you care for me, you always have. I didn't mean any of the words I said. I love you''

as you read the message, you wiped off your tears and replied:

''its okay Matty. i love you too. but try something like that again and imma beat yo ass. good night baby''

Matt smiled at the message and texted ''goodnight😭''

you went to bed glad that the matter had been resolved as quick as it had been.

THE END HOE

WHAT DO WE THINK??? AM I BLESSED AT WRITING???

I would also like to say thank you to my 4 followers😭you 4 are always gonna be remembered in my stories love you lots!!

#matt sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo x reader #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo fluff #matt sturniolo fanfic #university au #first fic

[midnight-in-town]

Predicting Cordelia's last resolve

I wish I could write something more sensible and optimistic, but this chapter almost tore my heart out...

For obvious reasons, Gudrid has a lot of plot armor and so does Karli. It makes no sense, considering last month's chapter, to have Thorfinn losing them right now, so it seems the story is rather heading towards Cordelia finding the strength to protect them, no matter what.

After all, even if Thorfinn & Gudrid were the only ones who ever told her "it was okay not to fight", they are also the ones who welcomed her without fear and who worked things through with Halfdan so that Cordelia would finally know freedom.

Cordelia is a kind soul, someone who dislikes fighting and war, but she loves Thorfinn and his family way more. She definitely won't kill, but she will probably die to protect Gudrid, Karli and his newborn brother with that strength of hers.

TBH as much as I really really absolutely love her character, I unfortunately don't think Thorfinn, Hild & co will make it in time. T_T Not with them currently being chased too. Last hope I kinda have is Ivar and Styrk finally becoming useful and saving them (instead of, y'know, triggering more conflict)...

But unfortunately again, Cordelia dying might also be the only way, narratively speaking, for characters like Einar, Ivar, Hild and Styrk to realize that staying in Vinland will cost them everything they've achieved so far (and that Thorfinn is actually not such a bad leader).

If anything though, as a dim ray of light deep within the storm that war brings, this chapter proved Thorfinn was right.

Even amongst the Lnu themselves, "desiring swords" simply translates as a way to control others: they pretend to be righteous and to act as leaders, because "violence" is the most effective way for them to keep their power over others.

Honestly I'm devastated. ;_; It's not Cordelia's first death flag, Sensei left hints here and there that she would probably sacrifice herself to save the place in which "she finally could live as herself" but, after this chapter, I've next to no hope of seeing her survive. T_T

Please prove me wrong, Yukimura-sensei...!

#vinland saga #cordelia #thorfinn karlsefni #gudrid #einar #karli #vs206 #vs theory #my analysis #no chapter next month that cliffhanger is awful #godddd i want to cry #ohhh no what if Karli becomes so very mad about Cordelia's death #that he gets himself in danger triggering that one parallel moment about 'fighting to save their son' between Thorfinn and Thors #T_T sensei why #i mean i get why #but she is so nice and kind #and also Gudrid is going to have a boy so she won't be able to name him after Cordelia like she hinted she would T_T #also i love how Sensei portrays how good old friends who went through a lot can heavily disagree when things get way too emotional #a while back no one would have even bet on a Thorfinn / Einar falling out #i have confidence that they'll make up but at what cost? Cordelia's death surely waaaaaaahhhhhhhhh T_T

[vaguely-concerned]

I binged through all of Dragon Age: Absolution today and honestly I really really liked it! I was allowing myself only some very cautious optimism after watching the twitch premiere of the first episode, but freed from the need for infodumps and setting up the characters the rest of the show actually rapidly gets better from there (some pacing issues here and there excepted but hey they were given 6 episodes, I think they did pretty well considering those constraints)! If like me you HUNGER for, you YEARN for, you CRAVE more Dragon Age right the fuck now, this is not at all a bad thing to help keep some of that hunger down while we wait for the next game, and has a few loveable new characters to get into and some great action animation to boot.

More idle thoughts/reactions under the cut!

first and foremost I love Roland and Lacklon so much haha, a surprisingly well paced romance considering it mainly happens in quick background-ish moments! I'm especially interested in Roland's backstory, since he's very chill and openminded for what seems to be a decently well-trained/educated Orlesian? Lacklon being like 'I want to hold his hand and suck his dick 😔 fml' every time Roland did something cool in battle was just *chef's kiss* too, it was kind of smart to have their fight scenes double as foreplay as well on a writing level since they're arguably the least plot-important characters overall (though they and Qwydion are definitely the heart of the story as far as I'm concerned)

I understand why Miriam clung to Hira so much since she just lost literally everything in her life, good or bad, moments before and that relationship was the only time she had tasted anything like real love since her brother died, but girl... girl when people show you who they are, believe them. marry Qwydion instead you deserve so much better (Hira gave me the Bad Vibes right away from how she didn't respect anything Miriam said or expressed and kept pushing in ways that made me really uncomfortable, so I won't say I was shocked or anything lol.) There is the (??deliberate??) mirror of Hira hugging Miriam from behind in the blood magic dream and Qwydion coming up behind her in very much the same way to rest her hand on her shoulder in the real world afterwards, so I have hope maybe?

can you imagine Dorian watching shitshows like this go down every other week all around Tevinter and tearing at his perfectly sculpted hair because Andraste's tits if you motherfuckers would stop acting stereotypically for FIVE MINUTES! could any of you go take a PISS without resorting to blood magic! Dorian's job is a shit job and he's probably been doing it for a while by the time of Dreadwolf so y'know. get my son a drink

speaking of Qwydion, I am so glad for further support for my theory that vashoth born away from the Qun are actually some of the most well-adjusted people in all of Thedas. they've dodged the Qun from birth by definition, they don't seem terribly interested in the Chantry or grand politics of any kind, they don't have a caste system hanging over them, they can step on anyone who tries to mess with them even if they don't have magic... truly the only sane people running around out here

so you're telling me the Inquisition screws Fairbanks over no matter what you do, b/c either he dies or he's forced into Orlesian politics. Oh buddy I'm sorry we should've just let you frolic around in the Emerald Graves on your own you didn't deserve this

Poor Tessa. she is probably better off without him in the long run but that's a rough week

I was so excited to see Kirkwall again, I saw the horrific chain statues and went 'OH HELLHOLE MORE LIKE HELLHOME'. it's so grim and awful I miss it so much lol

meredith, huh. so uh. hawke really has failed at everything, pretty much, then. even the few people they did manage to kill to protect everyone didn't stay dead. I'm just waiting for the dragon they killed in the Bone Pit to come back and ravage the city as well now, just to top it off. celestial punching bag of thedas hawke. babyyyyyyyyy if it helps I still love you the most and so does your collection of bi weirdos found family

rezaren wasn't even that good a mage, as far as we can tell, so you have to wonder what the FUCK dorian's ancestor was pulling to have created this thing that he could barely control with half a dragon's worth of blood (and what someone like Dorian, who helped crack time like an egg in his student days sort of just to see if he could, it seems, could do with it if they didn't have like scruples or other pesky things like that. everything we see about tevinter magisters makes me more impressed with how comparatively not fundamentally shitty Dorian has managed to turn out (no wonder Bull is kind of impressed with him for having actual integrity, if this is the competition he's up against). can you tell I miss him lol)

I found it genuniely interesting how much rezaren and hira are thematic mirrors to each other and mutually cannot see it, right down to treating miriam ultimately as an object. same self-centered idiot, different hairstyles. what a scathing indictment of Tevinter high society that even Hira, who's family was notoriously progressive and trying to enact change, still treats people exactly the same way as the other magisters when push comes to shove.

thank u to Lacklon for pessimistic cynical bastard representation, he is right that that dragon is going to ravage the countryside and someone on the crew has to keep clear eyes for that sort of thing even when it's a downer

#dragon age #dragon age absolution #dragon age absolution spoilers #dragon age: absolution spoilers #dragon age: absolution