#i havent slept for weeks

[feathers-feathers]

Bug Fables' deep lore is engaging in open warfare with my mental helath i swear to GOD I CAnt figure this tHE FUCK OUT IM GOING INSANE

Context: I'm trying to make a timeline. Bug fables took this personally.

The big question here that got me to break is what the fuck is the deal with Flower Gods? So I was writing an essay of sorts to try and figure it out as I go, then clean it up and post it when I came to a few satisfying conclusions, and maybe make a poll to see what others would prefer.

I have now lost at least a decade of my lifespan, and will be seeking reparations in the court of law. I'll post what I wrote below the cut, just be aware that it's not finished, will not be finished if I have a gun to my head, and jumps places every now and then because that's just how I roll in the drafting stage.

I hope to all the gods above that some of you can find sense where I have failed.

Beware: Here be dragons. (Also, it's quite long.)

BEGIN

Currently doing timeline shenanigans with Bug Fables. I learned something in the lore that will have a major impact in how that timeline manifests. The problem is that this lore detail isn't exactly straight-forward, and has multiple interpretations. I'd like to see some other thoughts on this matter before I make a decision. The lore in question is regarding the creation of the Flower Gods.

A reminder: There is a secret room in Snakemouth Den that displays information regarding the 3 Flower Gods. Prior to seeing this room, most I think didn't even know there were 3 - only knowing of Venus at the time. The other two are Mars and Pluto. These displays tell us a few things. Some information on the gods themselves: Venus is

Guardian: M-001 "Mars" Age: 361 Status: Stable

Guardian: V-012 "Venus" Age: 358 Status: Stable

Guardian: P-183 "Pluto" Age: 34 Status: Stable

This secret asks a whole bunch of questions and answers exactly none of them.

The first thought I see many people go to is that this, of course, confirms that the Roaches created them. However, there is dialogue from Venus herself stating "Ah, it still feels like it was yesterday when they were scurrying around the land trying to get stuff together!" Which doesn't say much, but sort of implies that she was around while the Roaches were still figuring things out.

But what about those designations, what do they mean? For something like this - and considering they all start with the first letter of the Guardian's name - I think it's, like, a version number.

If they were all created by the Roaches, then… wtf? So with Mars, they got it right on their very first try - congratulations, a fucking GOD is born - but their next Guardian took 12 attempts? What? And then Pluto took 183 attempts. And the time discrepancy is just…. weird. Wtf does this mean? The Roaches started off as the best scientists ever, getting everything correct on their first go, then suddenly dropping the ball off the face of the Earth and getting nothing right? For centuries? And after all of that, they consider the Sapling to be their greatest creation. Not any of the Actual Deities they supposedly made. And then they place two of these gods in… just… entirely different territories. Mars is in the Eastern lands. Lord knows where Pluto is, but not Bugaria, that's for sure. I do find this rather unpalatable.

If they weren't created by the Roaches - they were just studying them, trying to replicate their power - I think that fits some of this better. Especially that above quote by Venus. If she was around before the Roaches developed what they have now - the Roaches being the first bugs to awaken - then did she awaken before even them? If she - and, perhaps, Mars - were the first to awaken, then was the Day of Awakening only around 370 years ago? That would probably be the best case scenario for developing a timeline. It'd be the only True Date that can be nailed down, and make it a lot easier to place other dates around it by comparison.

But still… what's the deal with the version numbers? Perhaps the Guardians do not have true immortality, but ressurrective immortality? That would sort imply that Pluto might in fact be the first, and he's on his 183'd life. It would also mean that Mars would actually be the youngest of the gods. Despite being the oldest current version, he is still only on his First version - no deaths, no resurrections. This would also mean that Pluto died around the time the Roaches vanished. But also - if Pluto died 182 times prior to his current iteration… what the fuck kind of life is this guy living? Is he stuck in a death loop, wtf?

This is honestly just another discrepancy, to me. Lets be as conservative as possible and say that most of Pluto's lives were all around 30 years in length. This is so conservative as to be ridiculous, but let's just ignore that. 183 x 30 = 5490. That's Fucking Old - and I'm gonna say, just as ridiculous. Why, then, would the other two gods only have a few years of an age gap? This feels like a strong point towards the idea that the Roaches created them??? that the designations are version numbers before deployment and not ressurrective iterations???

Oh My God. What the fuck am I supposed to believe?

BREAK

This is where I officially gave up. I hate all of these ideas none of them are satisfactory. Bug Fables why do you hate me so muchae dsafsafgfghrdsgrdfeignbreoiatghnbfrabgifrhdfhdfghdfsghdfizghsregtbdfsgfcuigh

#bug fables #dear god help me figure this out #i havent slept for weeks #i missed so many calls #what year is it? #is silksong out yet? #long post #unfinished essay

[rudeboimonster]

~help your local rat get stable housing~

edit post nov 2023: I GOT THE HELP I NEEDED THANK YOU SOSOOSO MUCH

dramatically sprawled out on the floor

so i gotta move for the third time in that many years. unfortunately between health problems and the General State of The Economy, I have been unable to find work to be able to save any money. i have no choice but to leave the entire state. i thankfully have somewhere to go, however I need help getting there. i've been trying to do the math to get what I need to its lowest amount possible, but even that is still at least $2.5k.

after this move, i should be able to get things more stable and I might even have a couple job prospects lined up in that area, but right now I'm really scraping the bottom of the barrel funds wise and desperately need help.

if you're able to spare anything, i've set up a goal through kofi so i can track it publicly. i have trouble asking for help but i really need what help i can get. thank you, so so so much.

#mutual aid #fundraiser #help #god i dont know what to tag this im just kinda ripping off the bandage bc ive been anxious about posting about this since i got asked to #leave. head in hands. please help by spreading the word if you cant spare any cash i completely understand. #i dont know what i can offer. my ability to do art has been really really low and with my sleeping/living arrangements my wrists shoulders #back have been in fucking wretches states so its hard for me to do much #if youre wonder about the other fundraiser i did a few years ago #the person i replaced in a renting situation ended up fucking me over and got basically evicted into the 2nd week of college and i had 3 da #to leave that situation or more people wouldve gotten fucked over. and ive been basically couch surfing since trying to find work #anyways i havent slept in a bed for more than a weekend since october 2021 my back is turbo fucked please help

[nolassolace]

Late to the party as always but at least we're partying!!!!

For the @nark-week prompts "Cigarette"

Doodler and demon ver below💕💕💕

#nark week 2024 #nark #dndads #god this took longer than it should #yall know me #cant resists adding in those horns and them tentacles #but look at themmmm #my boys #leave nice tags on my art i havent slept in +24 hours #lark oak #lark oak garcia #nick close #nicolas foster #nicky freeman #dungeons and daddies

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some (late) holiday photos of the boye~!

#cats #holiday #OUGHH....... barely could even get these edited and posted... my mysterious sickness flare up has been sooo bad the past few #days.. I didn't even go to the usual obligatory family christmas I was supposed to attend (!!! health issue/medical mention in tags below) #My stomach issues basically put me in a constant state of uncontrollable shivering/body shaking + nausea + sometimes rapid heart #rate. and when it happens at night that makes it like.. nearly impossible to sleep when you're violently shaking + you can feel your heart #so strong + you keep having to run to the bathroom every 5 minute to cough and gag #and throw up and so on and so forth. etc. So I went like 40 hours without any sleep almost for christmas eve and all of christmas day #last night I finally got maybe 2 hours of sleep in between the nausea and shaking and stuff. and then today I was able to get a few #hours of sleep in the afternoon. Today I tried taking an anxiety mediciation a doctor gave me in case it was anxiety related (it's apparent #ly used to relax people and works in the moment. rather than like Anxiety Mediciation that you have to take for weeks to see any effect #because I think this isn't actually acting on your brain chemistry it's judt like..a mild sedative or something.) but all that did was make #me dizzy and sweaty lol. I;m glad I slept a little but I'm just still frustrated that I don't feel normal. I started having these #'episodes' (with the stomach issues + shaking + heartrate + nausea etc.) like at the end of october. And usually it will happen for like a #few hours at a time. or i'll lose sleep one day and then be fine the next. but this has been like nearly 3 days of feeling weird. so is #getting kind of annoying... It's funny too because I was so so productive like.. literally the few days before. I was feeling much better #and I was working on my game and blah blah. But then.. random issue flare up out of nowhere of course.. yaayy.... happy holidays to meee lo #I did at least see two random ducks outside of my window in the yard area for christmas. and havent seen them since. So it's like.. hrmm.. #pacing around my room nauseous and shakings and etc. but at least... hello.. two little ducks placed there just for me :3c #Now I get anxiety every night which I'm sure doesn't help/could exacerbate whatever underlying genuinely physical issues exist. But after #like 2 nights of 'I spend the night sleepless and incredibly uncomfortable just sitting in the dark sick' then bedtime is like.. dread... #I even was trying slapping myself in the face in desperation to see if somehow that could shock my body out of whatever the hell it was #doing lol.. up at 3am holding ice cubes in my hand and hitting myself in the head and crying from exhaustion and thowing up.. literally #ridiculous cartoon character feeling... AAANYWAY!!! At least I have baby boy pictures. and I have lots of doctors appointments so hopefully #whatever the issue is can be sorted out at some point. I don't know much about ibs but hopefully maybe something like that that I could pos #ibly take medication for and not something more seirous or anything. Maybe there's a food I'm secretly intolerant to or whatever. #And I did at least post a sims holday video actually timed for the holidays so that's something. I havent been productive really latrely #though obviously.. I can't even play games or small tasks when in that state since I'm just SO physically uncomfortable. Nausea and heart #stuff are THE hardest physical sensations to ignore.. BUT yeah... hoping I shall sleep at all tonight. hopeing to get like 3 productive #things done.. at some point... at least SOMETHING... lol..... *** *** ***

[kisses4kaia]

omg i love ur writing sm<33 since there’s quite a few fics where charlie is a sub i was wondering if you could write some smut where he’s in control instead? also thank u for doing god’s work and writing abt charlie since there’s such a shortage in fics abt him :,)

omg thank you for the kind words and yes !! yk it’s hard work , carrying the entire charlie walker uprising on this app on my back😔 JK I LOVE IT AND YOU GUYS !! fem! reader , nsfw , pet names , etc , etc .

princess🎠- c, walker ,,

as you lie on your back, naked, tied up, on your bed, you begin to wonder how you even got yourself into this position.

well, it started as an innocent takeout dinner on the couch with your boyfriend. you settled on your favorite movie of all time '10 things i hate about you', and well, charlie hated it.

"see, heath ledger's great and all but, it's totally confusing," he claimed. you snorted at this. "oh yeah? how so?"

"i mean, joey, the popular guy, wants to take out bianca, the popular girl. however, bianca's dad won't let her date unless her freak sister, kat, does. and so popular guy joey goes and pays delinquent guy patrick to take out freak sister kat so he can take popular girl bianca out?"

and he's not done.

"plus, patrick serenades kat to what, gain her trust? i just don't get it," he spoke at the iconic scene.

"no, dummy. obviously, you haven't been paying attention. he serenades kat to apologize to her," you said. "i didn't hear the words 'i'm sorry' anywhere in those lyrics," he said, matter of factly.

"okay, party pooper. you win," you rolled your eyes in retort. "i'm sorry, i know you love this movie," he apologized.

you laughed. "no biggie. and plus, i still owe you something for making you watch this absolute masterpiece of a film, so? what's it gonna be?" you looked up at him expectantly.

he seemed to think for a second before his eyes darkened. oh, he had something absolutely wicked in mind and you knew it.

"i want... to be on top, in the bedroom, tonight," he admitted, looking down and playing with his hands as if he was scared you were going to say no.

you smiled. "that's what you want? even wanna tie me up and everything?" you said, your smile evident in your tone. he looked up and nodded.

"well, lead the way, sir." the name made his stomach flip and his dick twitch. he had never jumped off of the couch so fast.

you followed him into the bedroom and his lips immediately found yours. his hands roamed your body and grabbed everywhere. your breathing became heavier and suddenly it seemed like you just couldn't get close enough to him.

he broke the kiss to speak. "take off your clothes and lay down on the bed," his breath was still in the air.

"yes, sir." you grinned widely at him as you obeyed his instructions. you were slow and teasing in your movements.

he tolerated it once you finally finished and laid your back on the soft mattress.

his eyes wandered over your body seemingly a million times. his gaze pierced through your skin and made you slightly self-conscious.

he removed his belt first, walking up to you and taking your wrists in his hands. "is this okay?" he asked softly before you nodded. "words, baby," he spoke again.

"yes." you verified. "yes, what?" he continued. "yes, sir." you corrected yourself.

"good girl."

he used the belt to restrain your hands onto the headboard.

the clothes that once hugged his body were gone quickly as he hovered over you, pressing a sweet, passionate kiss to your lips. he kissed down your neck, leaving a few wet spots in their wake.

his lips soon found the sweet spot on your collarbone he had grown to know oh so well. the sweet sounds that pulled from your vocal cords hardened his cock impossibly so.

"oh my god, char," you breathed out as one of his large hands found your breast. he twisted and pulled at the sensitive peak, loving the squirm of your body beneath him.

you felt so hot, like you couldn't get enough air in your lungs when charlie began kissing down your body, stopping at where you needed him the most.

his middle finger dragged down your torso to your slit, running it up and down, teasing your entrance multiple times. you tugged on the restraints.

"please," you quietly whined. "hm? what was that, princess?" you moaned at the name. "fuck, please, charlie." you begged, lifting your head off of the pillow slightly to lock eyes with him.

"since you asked so nicely," he said before pushing the digit inside of you.

little choked whines and whimpers escaped your lips as he curled the finger and pumped it in and out of you. "so good, please don't stop," you moaned as your eyes shut in ecstasy.

he continued his work on you until your moans increased more and more in volume. "fuck, i'm almost there!" you almost shouted before he sped up his abuse on your cunt.

he was unrelenting in his need to make you cum. he even added his thumb, circling it around your clit. you threw your head back onto the pillow behind you as your mouth fell open in pleasure.

your orgasm approached faster than you'd expected. "go ahead, doll. cum for me," he permitted. it took nothing else to make you unravel. he spoke you through it.

"shh, you're doing so well for me. my good, good, girl."

he goes to remove the belt from your wrists, and you actually begin to think the nights through. you try to sit up before he pushes right back down.

"oh, sweetheart. you thought tonight was over? we've only just begun, pretty girl."

tags; @themostintellectualblonde @dreamtofus @wannabe-indie-sleaze @insanelycrazyanddelusional

#nonnieees💗 #kai's got mail <3📑 #charlie walker #rory culkin #charlie walker smut #sorry if this has mistakes im finishing this at 5 am i havent slept #scream #scream 4 #🧸 anon #kaiaaa where the hell you been loca ??? (i disappeared for like a week so sorry I've just been flooded with uni) #charlie walker fanfic #kaia writes charlie

[obsob]

yes i am getting emails 

#dracula daily #mine #lov that this means absolutely nothing to people not reading ksjfksl #i love jonathan hes gay and autistic cant wait to see him get eaten or smth #im back from a 2 week work break now! i was very burnt out i feel a lot better >:) drawing time #these images came to me in a vision yesterday evening but i was too tired to draw them #im sleepy now....sleepy baby...... #i slept so bad last night my tummy hurt so bad!!! idk why!!! i had a lot of carbs w dinner so maybe that was it #i still havent figured out what it is my stomach doesnt like. durham wheat i think is oneof them but ??? dfdsfj #whatever. my fault for not drinking more peppermint tea #i didnt like wake up wake up last night but i kept like. coming to a little bit n shifting abt until i found a more comfy position #utmmy ouchy.......hopefully will be less so tonight heh!! #i idid yoga this morning i forgot how much i lov it #also ive been reading captive prince again. is this series a lil problematic? yes. thats why the gods gave us critical thinking #i need a break from stone earth trilogy im on to the last book now....ouhghg...... #have a new book arriving tomorrow yes yes yes yes

[hexcodesims]

i'm waiting for mods to get updated for the new patch/EP so you get a sims4studio screenshot for my cc wip :P bagged fruit earrings!!

#cc wip #i havent tested these in game yet so im very excited to see how invisible those fruits are at any distance 😭 #i've had a Bad Health Week and slept for 16 hours and then got a second wind at 6 pm yesterday to make this lmfao

[pawsomelestat]

i need someone to stop me.

#gay #the crow 1994 #eric draven #the crow #it happened again #i keep blacking out and making weird edits of eric draven #edit #kpop moodboard #gothic #vampire #please help i havent slept in weeks

[drizzlefin]

The Joxter

#the joxter #joxter #the moomins #oshun oxtra #exploits of moominpappa #art #my art #moomin #mumrik #i discovered moomin like a week ago and havent slept since #i had to draw him asap #moomin fanart #clip studio paint

[bodynbeats]

you guys remember that picture of john cena

#as i told my friend: he has a dead look in his eyes that says i have a newborn daughter and my wife and i havent slept in 2 weeks #and as my dear friend replied: the wash was full from a catastrophe mess that comes with kids and his dress shirt simply wasn't done in time #thats really just an excuse for me wanting to draw jowd in the princess celestia shirt tho #tag : ghost trick #tag : my art #probably should have waited to post this with some other sketches but like who give a hoot

[valerieofavonlea]

The Sanderson/Cosmere subreddit spoiler policies are absolutely ridiculous and discussion stifling, a mini rant

Exhibit the first: on r/brandonsanderson a poster put up a picture of a Bridge 4 onesie, and it got spoiler tagged by a mod. The reasoning? The Bridge 4 logo with Kholin blue is a WoR spoiler. I'm of the opinion that that is one of those things that is a spoiler only if you already know, and is imo overly cautious

Exhibit the second: any kinds of spoilers are banned from post titles, resulting in a sub full of titles like this:

Idk about you guys, but as someone who has read all of these books, I would have no way of knowing what any these are about without looking at them individually. How is this good for facilitating discussion?

Exhibit the third, the actual spoiler policy:

Exhibit the fourth, just this attitude:

It's a shame it's so arduous to talk about the cosmere in r/cosmere

I am actually a big fan of spoiler tagging stuff, and I have in fact yelled at people in this fandom before for not spoiler tagging, but this is too much. This is clearly catering to new readers, and idk about you guys, but I think that there's a lot of responsibility re: avoiding spoilers, that has to be put on the person who doesn't want to be spoiled. There's some common courtesy stuff like tagging any pre-release content, or brand new books for a reasonable amount of time, but for the most part, avoiding spoilers should be on the person who doesn't want to see them. If I were currently reading or planning on reading a series I sure as f wouldn't be wandering into the subreddit dedicated to that series. I get tagging stuff for the secret projects right now, but everything? Some of these books are approaching 20 years since publication. If someone has waited this long to read the book, then they can wait a bit longer to participate in the fandom. 🤷‍♀️

There are always going to be new readers, but it should really be their responsibility to avoid spoilers if it matters to them. Or at least do the bare minimum. Honestly I think that the mods over there should just throw a general spoiler warning up top in a pinned post and let people live

#I don't even go in the subs that often #but every time i do i get annoyed about this #especially because they spoiler tag everything and remove tons of comments #but still posted tress's full title two days before it released??? #anyway i do in fact want to gatekeep #sam says stuff #sorry if this doesnt make much sense i havent slept well this week #crawling out of my hole and choosing a little bit of violence as a treat #this does seem to be a reddit wide problem but it's particularly a problem in these subs #this is another reason why tumblr is superior #cosmere #brandon sanderson #cfsbf #rant over. i do feel slightly better now 😂

[zaine-the-cat-meme-generator]

#corn #me @ 4.33 am hungry for a snack #cat #funny #memes #meme #cat memes #cats #funny memes #haha #me like food #funny cats #CORN #corncat #corn on the cat #:) #im sorry #i havent slept well @ all this week #i hate being sick #but im still awesome dw

[toastyblackcat]

I don't struggle w autism I suffer w it (its 6am I can't sleep bcs I can't stop thinking abt haikyuu)

#haikyuu #autism #let me sleep #i havent slept well in days bro #falling asleep at like 4am every night for the past like week is not good

[pinkmoondoll9shihtzu]

O _ O

#no one in this house is willing to do the bare minimum to help me get more than 4 hrs sleep a night #like simply just closing the dog gate behind them so the dogs dont burst in my room at 7am #ive asked so many times like #slimbo used to help w this stuff but now she works mornings and isnt home #and the rest ofnthe family just like. does not care at all i guess #at this point i just hope i die i havent slept all week and my cold isnt going away ):

[thewickerking]

back 2 college fit :] ignore that ive pulled an all nighter and still am not fully packed. also ignore the dirty mirror and bra strap i do not give enough of a fuck to fix either 💀💀

#the drawings are what i drew for my sister when she was in the er for her broken arm the other day. busy week #also. i would accessorize more but. packing it all idk where 80% of my stuff is rn #no id #<- sorry. i wouldnnormally but i havent slept and i have to continue packing i shouldnt even be in here rn 💀💀💀💀💀💀 #.ares

[theundeadmetalheadapolagia]

I'm just saying, I think these two should've met, for reasons beyond weed & being my faves of all time.

Also I'm using gay here just as a general community thing. I know it's more complex with Argyle definitely & Eddie possibly.

Text ID in alt

#''but nick!'' you say ''the subcultures each character belong to might have entirely different contexts for those costume #decisions! don't you think its reductive to assign queerness where it might not be intended?" #to which i say ''sure.'' but listen honey if youre engaging with this post you gotta play in my sandbox #jargyle #steddie #argyle stranger things #eddie munson #forgive how shitty this is i havent slept a full night in over a week & its hitting