#i mean it’s similar to the one before but i expanded a bit so it’s up to you whether y you count it as a separate essay or not | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

loaksky · 9 months

Note

Hi I was wondering if you wrote or if you will write a part 2 to neighbour Ellie x reader, cause I would love to see how their relationship will progress and maybe there can be a bit of jealous Ellie and insecure reader, in like maybe they meet their exes or something like that

neighbor!ellie x sunshine!fem reader, hurt + comfort / fluff / smut MDNI!! or we’re beefing!! / established relationship, wc: 5.2k

synopsis: things between you and ellie seem to be going great! that is until you pay her a visit at work to drop off lunch and find that the threads that tie her and an overfriendly coworker tangle too much for your liking.

content warnings: language, slightly mean!ellie makes a return, reader isn’t necessarily insecure, but a little unsure of the circumstances, 18 + content / filthy make-up sex that consists of: brief shower-sex, scissoring, fingering / oral (reader & ellie!receiving), thigh-riding, so much kissing and mushy feelings.

author’s note: in love with this idea ! been mulling over how to expand on their relationship & i feel like this is a great segue ! hcs below; leave some more scenarios for existing couples (emt!abby, collegebff!ellie or others) and i’ll answer them ! (also not proofread well like usual lmao)

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jealous!ellie & jealous!reader are SO different, but i feel like the outcome would be so…YUM.

feel like you’d be more reserved about being jealous.

like lately, it seems like things between you and ellie seem like they can’t get any better.

the two of you spend so much time together, whether it’s having picnics in the park with some pastries you make, testing out recipes after close at your cafe or having sleepovers at one or the other’s apartment.

ellie’s lowkey obsessed with you and at times it makes you blush because after the initial stages of feeling your relationship out, you find that ellie’s extremely vocal and outright with her affection for you.

and for the longest time, you don’t question it. don’t really say much because ellie’s particularly good at reassuring you even if you don’t ask.

it’s why you think you’re overreacting when you decide to surprise her and bring her lunch on a random afternoon in the middle of the week.

the top half of her coveralls hangs around her hips, dirtied white tank exposing tanned, inked flesh and lean muscle when you enter the lobby.

she’s leaning against one of the tool carts with her arms crossed over her chest, gaze unwavering.

when you trace her eyeline, you realize there’s another girl nearby bent under the hood of a shiny red car.

she says something imperceptible and suddenly ellie’s throwing her head back with a laugh, sound muffled by the sliding plexiglass.

“hey, receptionist is on break, can i help you with something?” a mechanic is poking his head into the lobby from an adjoining office.

“uh, i’m here for ellie?” the mechanic’s glancing through the glass into the main garage before standing from his rolling chair to dust his hands on his coveralls.

“yeah, she’s supposed to be watching the front,” he laughs. “too busy flirting with her lil girlfriend to pay attention.”

he doesn’t notice the way your face falls or how you almost drop the little canvas bag altogether.

you chance another glance at the two, find that the girl has emerged from under the hood and you swallow hard because god, she’s so fucking pretty.

doesn’t help that seeing her and ellie side-by-side makes you wonder if the two of you look that good together.

they look like they were made for each other and they even share similar interests! you don’t know a damned thing about cars and ellie’s gaze nearly glazes over every time you’re talking about your recipes and coffee pairings.

“uh, actually,” you stop him. “i don’t think she was expecting me, so i’ll just drop this off.”

he pauses.

“you sure? i can get her real quick, she’s not busy.”

ellie still hasn’t clocked you, so you shake your head.

“it’s fine,” you assure him. “i’ll talk to her later.”

he merely shrugs, meets you halfway for the canvas bag, and you’re quickly ducking out of the garage.

“babe?”

ellie’s right on the dot, you realize, when you hear her through the cracked sliding door to the balcony.

you’ve just finished watering your plants and now you’re jotting down a quick brainstorm for the upcoming spring launch.

through the window, you see ellie kicking her shoes off at the entrance before assessing her surroundings and poking her head into your bedroom for good measure.

“babe?” she calls out.

you stand, tucking the little notebook under your arm before sliding back inside.

she seems to light up when she sees you, crossing the living room to meet you halfway.

“hey, els.”

you’re letting her engulf you in a hug, arms wrapping around your waist as she buries her face in the crook of your neck.

“missed you today,” she hums, rocking your weight from side to side.

“missed you too,” you say gently.

ellie’s pulling away a short distance, finger bumping under your chin so you’ll look up at her.

“why didn’t you say hi when you stopped in today?” she nearly pouts. “zack came in when we were slow and said that someone dropped something off for me.”

you shrug, unable to tell her that insecurity was rearing its ugly head and you didn’t know how to deal with it in that moment.

“my girl didn’t wanna eat with me?”

“sorry,” you mumble, burning up under the heat of her gaze. “i couldn’t stay long.”

her brows are furrowing, hands coming up to smooth your hair from your face and brush over your shoulders.

“everything okay, babe?”

you nod once, then twice.

“yeah, why wouldn’t i be?”

ellie’s watching you closely, fingers cupping your neck.

“talk to me,” she encourages softly. “did something happen?”

you swallow, shake your head, and put on your most convincing smile before leaning up to give her a peck on the lips.

“m’okay,” you tell her.

she doesn’t look convinced, but she also doesn’t wanna pry.

changes the subject instead.

“so does this mean, you’ll swing by and actually hang out with me soon?” she asks, body relaxing when you start smoothing over the wrinkles in her coveralls as a distraction.

you nod, smile widening when she starts peppering kisses all over your face.

for a little bit, you forget about ellie’s coworker and you forget about the comment that zack made, but then you’re popping in again almost two weeks later.

they’re shoulder to shoulder in the body shop, looking at something under the hood of a silver pick up truck. ellie’s engrossed, but the girl’s fullblown staring, paying no mind to whatever ellie’s explaining in the engine bed.

makes you sick to your stomach thinking that if ellie so much as chances a glance, their noses could brush.

“hey receptionist is— oh.”

it’s zack, the same mechanic from last time.

he’s wiping his hands on an old towel as he emerges from one of the bays.

“ellie!” he shouts past the propped open door.

she nearly jumps out of her skin, parting from her coworker as she throws a cross look over her shoulder.

“your girl’s here,” he announces.

ellie’s straightening up, craning her neck even more before her face splits into a bright smile.

she’s abandoning the girl by the truck, jogging across the body shop to duck into the lobby.

“hi, angel.”

your cheeks warm when she slides her arm around your waist to pull you into her.

“gonna go on lunch break, don’t wait up,” she calls & you’re sparing the girl near the truck a glance.

her name’s emma if the stitching on the right breast of her coveralls is anything to go by.

she makes a show of taking you in from head to toe before her gaze cuts to zack and they seemingly share a wordless exchange.

oh.

you have no clue what to make of that, but ellie’s steering you from the lobby and out into the crisp air.

it’s still a little chilly outside, but you’re wearing one of ellie’s favorite sweatshirts and she’s shrugging on a hoodie hanging from a coatrack by the door.

“my truck?” she offers when a chill rips down your spine.

you only hum.

when the two of you are settled, her in the driver’s seat and you in the passenger’s, she’s taking the little bag with lunch containers and setting it on her dash before pulling you towards her to eliminate every inch of space between the two of you.

“whaddya doing?” you sigh out a laugh.

“i missed you,” ellie says simply.

“ellie, you slept over last night,” you squeak out a breathy laugh when her ice cold hands slide under the warmth of the red fleece. “we saw each other this morning.”

“so?” she replies petulantly. “wanna be with you all the time.”

you’re wearing a turtleneck underneath the sweatshirt so she’s nosing along your jaw before pressing a few soft kisses there.

“you’re so clingy recently, els,” you giggle, arms winding around her neck.

“duh.” and your belly flips when she doesn’t even deny it. “you’re so fucking cute and i just wanna keep you in my pocket all the time.”

that earns her a full-hearted laugh and you really begin to wonder why you let that girl with her stupidly perfect blown out hair and stupidly rounded ass and the most stupidly pretty face ever make you question your ellie.

you live in bliss for the duration of her forty-five minute break where she does a whole lot of eating, but not necessarily the food you made for her.

the windows are equal parts fogged and frosted by the time she’s done with you and you’re shimmying your jeans back up in the back seat of her truck as she shrugging the top half of her discard coveralls and her hoodie back on again.

“you didn’t even touch to food i made you,” you whine.

“i’ll eat it on my ten,” she assures you, and your toes curl when she wipes her lips with the back of her hand.

“liked what i had for lunch better,” she says so casually, your cheeks are on fire.

“ellie!”

“definitely need dessert when i get home,” she insinuates, leaning her weight over your blissed out body.

she plants a kiss on your mouth before climbing back into the front seat.

but, in the lobby, when she’s bidding you a farewell with another peck on the lips, promising she’ll try to come home early, you notice emma’s eyes again. they’re searing, laced with obvious annoyance.

ellie’s returning to her duties and you’re ducking into their restroom for a moment to splash your face with cool water.

ellie’s never given you a reason to doubt her, has been a perfect girlfriend since the beginning, but you can’t help yourself.

especially not when you’re ducking out and you hear it.

“so i’m not the only one surprised that her girl looks like that?” you think it’s zack, but you can’t be so sure.

“i dunno, she’s hot, but they don’t really match,” another voice sounds. “especially since her last…thing was with emma.”

and, wow, fuck, you hadn’t been expecting that.

“damn, i forgot about that,” maybe zack says. “it was at the party mel and them threw, right? when they fucked?”

you’d wanted to give the benefit of the doubt. maybe they’d been a thing once upon a time, kissed on occasion, but hearing it put so crassly makes you feel like you’re gonna throw up.

the bell’s tinkling hard against the glass when you throw the door open.

and perhaps the situation with finding out about ellie and emma goes hand-in-hand with the way ellie experiences her jealousy.

maybe the fact that ellie still works closely with a previous situationship and is obviously on friendly terms with makes you withdraw a little.

you’re spending a lot more time at your cafe, readying for spring launch and brainstorming new recipes.

you don’t want to bore ellie, especially when you’ve been so in your head about everything lately, so you’re putting in more hours, coming home late at night.

truthfully, ellie’s devastated because she misses her girl :/ why are you always so busy suddenly?

so when a familiar face comes poking into the cafe a few weeks down the line, your eyes are as wide as saucers.

“wow, alex, is that you?”

she’s an ex who’d moved abroad for work a few years back. and the break up had been amicable enough, but she’d moved on and so had you.

the only contact the two of you keep is the occasional comment on social media and a text or two during the holidays.

she’s grinning ear-to-ear.

“what are you doing here?” you ask incredulously, setting the rag down on the bartop to round the counter.

you’d been in the middle of prepping to close up shop when the bells chimed against the glass.

“visiting my parents for a few weeks,” she answers. “thought i’d stop by and see how you’re doing.”

“great, i’m doing great,” you assure her with a warm smile. “what about you? how’s germany?”

“definitely miss the food here sometimes, but you know,” she shrugs and you’re letting out a laugh. “and...julia’s pregnant.”

and your brows are shooting up, arms wrapping around her middle.

“alex, that’s so exciting!” you cheer. “congratulations.”

her cheeks are red when you pull away.

“yeah,” she says softly, eyes gentle. “i’m so excited.”

and you’re glad to hear that things are working out for her, that she’s established herself well and she’s building the family she’s always dreamed of.

“and you?” she asks.

“what about me?”

“are you seeing anyone?”

it’s your turn to warm, fidgeting under her expectant gaze.

“i am,” you confirm.

her smile widens

“that’s great,” she says genuinely. “i’m glad. i hope they make you happy.”

and it really makes you draw into yourself for a moment because ellie does. she makes you so fucking happy, you don’t know what to do with yourself sometimes.

“yeah,” you hum. “she’s great.”

the two of you end up catching up a little as you close, and she even takes you up on your offer of visiting again for a tasting before she leaves!

and this is most likely what sends ellie over the edge.

at first she didn’t know why you were suddenly so distant, knew you were dedicated, but didn’t know why you were so invested as of late.

recently, it’s been her popping into your apartment, but being disappointed to find that you’re not even home.

and the days that she does catch you, you’re pecking her on the lips and rushing out the door.

makes ellie question if there’s something she should be paying closer attention to.

honestly, she’s just really worried that she did something wrong, so as she’s trekking up the sidewalk to approach your little cafe with a bundle of cute flowers around 10 in the evening, she’s feeling a weird sense of deja vu.

finds that the open sign has been flipped and that the lights are dim, but nearly trips over her steps when she peers inside and sees you behind the counter.

you’re not alone, a tall figure leaned up against the bartop, obviously deeply interested in whatever you’re animatedly talking about.

you’re still wearing your apron, hair falling from its hold and a lump is lodging its way into ellie’s throat.

tugs gently on the handle to see that it’s locked and the motion catches both you and your company’s attention.

god, whoever you’re with is an absolute stunner and ellie’s swallowing hard as you round the counter and flit through the tables to come let her in.

“els, what are you doing here?” you ask, smiling softly.

barely registers what you’re saying because the girl you’re with has straightened and there’s something so put together and elegant about the brunette that makes a pang of insecurity begin to coil in ellie’s stomach.

“wanted to see you,” she says simply.

“oh,” you reply. “we were just finishing up here, i would’ve been home in like an hour.”

and that leaves such a sour taste in her mouth because a lot can happen in an hour, in forty-five minutes even.

“great, i’ll walk you home,” ellie says, tone pinched.

your brows furrow and you’re opening your mouth to ask ellie if everything’s fine, but alex is placing a casual hand on your shoulder to remind you she’s there and ellie can’t help but zero in on the way her slender fingers curl.

“alex,” she introduces, offering her other hand.

“ellie,” your girlfriend bites back, glancing at alex’s outstretched palm before glancing back up at her.

there’s a twinkle of knowing in alex’s eye as she nods thoughtfully.

“heard a lot about you,” she says simply.

ellie merely hums.

and god, you’re mortified because you’d spent the entire night raving about ellie even though alex was supposed to be giving you feedback on launch ideas.

you’d told her how kind and great ellie was. instead, here she is, ice cold and glaring.

“well...” alex turns her attention to you. “i really appreciate tonight, everything was phenomenal.”

you preen under the praise and ellie’s rolling her eyes, fist tightening around the stems of the flowers.

“of course, anytime,” you assure her. “thank you for visiting me again.”

and seeing the two of you side-by-side, ellie feels so small. because you’ve always been so pretty, so out of her league and the two of you look like a match made in heaven.

“always,” alex replies, and ever the instigator, she adds, “text me when you get home?”

“i will,” you tell her, brushing past ellie to lock her out. “goodnight, alex, be safe!”

she says something in return that evades ellie’s hearing, but she’s far too livid to even tune in.

you’ve barely locked the door behind her when ellie’s voice cuts through the tense air.

“who the fuck was that?” she asks sharply.

you turn on your heel, brows dipping because ellie’s rarely let her anger get the best of her.

“ellie, what are—”

“i asked you a question,” she says firmly.

you roll your lips, gaze downcast because such a good moment has been obliterated by ellie’s fiery temper.

“we dated a few years ago,” you answer honestly. “she was back in town for the next few weeks and i wanted to do something nice.”

ellie lets out a humorless laugh.

“so i’ve been worried sick for weeks because you wanna ghost me when you’ve really been parading around with your ex?” ellie huffs.

and okay, wow, you hadn’t really expected that from her because your ellie is usually relatively level-headed.

“this is only the second time i’ve seen her, ellie,” you argue. “we were friends way before we even dated and it was a clean break up. we were just catching up.”

ellie’s tossing the bouquet of flowers, now crushed by her unrelenting fist, onto the nearest table top.

“just catching up, huh?” she mocks. “so a romantic set up, just the two of you, is just catching up? you said not to wait up for you because you’d be caught up with work. good to know that screwing your ex is—”

“this is work,” you bite back. “i’ve been trying to get my bearings for this upcoming launch and she was kind enough to put up with all my crazy ideas and all my rambling,” then quietly, “given ninety percent of it was about you.”

“what, you couldn’t ask me?” ellie huffs. “you know i’d help you if you wanted me to!”

“i didn’t ask because i know all this shit bores you,” you say weakly. “alex was just being nice.”

that shuts ellie up, douses her anger like a bucket of ice cold water on a fire. and now she feels like a piece of shit because she hadn’t known that you felt that way.

“and she’s engaged,” you add, pulling away from her when she takes a step towards you. instead you busy yourself with gathering your spread and all the silverware. “they’re expecting a child.”

and fuck, ellie wishes she’d slowed down. wishes that she hadn’t talked out of her ass.

“i didn't—”

“you’re one to talk, ellie,” you add coldly. “you work in close proximity with a girl you used to fuck regularly. you’re still friends with her, and it’s obvious to every single soul imaginable that i’m just an obstacle to her and that she’s still interested. but i didn’t say anything even if it fucking ate away at me because i know you. you’ve never given me a reason to doubt us.”

that knocks that wind from ellie’s lungs because she hadn’t realized that you knew. just wanted to sweep it under the rug because her and emma were never serious and she didn’t want you worrying.

“wait, angel, i’m sorry,” ellie says. “i—”

you shake your head.

“whatever, ellie,” you whisper. “i have to close up.”

“c’mon, babe, don’t—”

“i don’t wanna talk about this anymore,” you cut her off. “i’ll be home soon, but i wanna be alone right now.”

when you get home and see ellie’s sneakers by the door, you take in a deep breath and try to mentally prepare yourself for the inevitable conversation, but instead, you’re met with the smell of your favorite take out and a soft murmur from your vinyl player in the living room.

when you make it to the end of the corridor to peer into the kitchen, you see ellie taking down a few plates.

she’s glancing over her shoulder, body seemingly relaxing when she finds you standing in the archway of the kitchen.

“hey,” she greets softly, and you belatedly realize that her voice is hoarse.

“hi,” you reply.

“wanna eat first?” she asks you, but you don’t answer, too busy analyzing her.

you put two and two together; figure that she’s been crying if the red bags under her eyes and the dying flush on her cheeks is anything to go by.

she takes a step towards you and you seem to snap out of it.

“wanna shower first,” you tell her.

you hear her gulp.

“okay,” she says.

and you hate this. you hate being upset and you hate that she’s upset and knowing that ellie cried makes you wanna cry, so you’re taking a step towards her.

she’s glancing at you.

“shower with me?” you offer timidly.

ellie’s pushing off the counter, nodding eagerly.

and truthfully, ellie had every intention of keeping her hands to herself, but then you were asking her to help work the soap down your back.

then you were turning to face her to rinse under the stream of the showerhead. the sudsy water’s making its way down the column of your throat and the curves of your body and ellie’s tongue is so dry, she feels like it could crack in her mouth.

her hands settle on the narrow of your waist, right over the swell of your hips as she presses open-mouthed kisses on your shoulder.

“i’m so sorry, angel,” she whispers, hands sliding to rest against the small of your back.

you give in even though you’re still in your head, arms looping around her neck as she brushes your hair to one side and starts paying a lot more attention to the spot right behind your ear.

“s’okay, els,” you assure her softly. “i’m sorry, too. i was being a brat.”

your fingers tangle in the hair at the nape of her neck, breath hitching when she grabs a palmful of your ass and breaks away from your neck to catch your lips between her own.

“you don’t know how much i love you,” she murmurs between kisses, sighing brokenly when the plush of your tits presses against her sensitive nipples.

you moan when one of her hands slides down your front and gently brushes over your clit.

“ellie,” you whimper.

“let me show you?”

your head is lolling back when the pads of her calloused fingers circle your entrance to gather the slick that’s accumulating there.

you nod.

“yeah, yeah, ellie, please,” you choke.

she’s reaching behind you to turn the shower off, ducking outside of the tiled space to grab your towel.

and she’s slow, meticulous as she dries you off, mouth watering when the cool air of the bathroom makes gooseflesh ripple over your smooth skin.

“you’re so fucking perfect,” ellie whispers, standing behind you in the mirror. “so fucking perfect and all mine.”

your eyelids are drooping shut as she discards the towel, hands wandering as her teeth sink into your neck.

“oh, fuuu—”

ellie’s jostling you back into your bedroom. when she’s about to push you back against the mattress, you’re spinning so that she’s falling against the unmade duvet, taking you with her.

and ellie’s gaze is glazing over when you spread her legs to reveal a pussy slick with need and a clit so swollen, it makes you salivate.

“what are you doing?” she whispers, fingertips denting the fat of your thighs.

“wanna ride you, els,” you whimper, climbing to straddle her heat. “wanna take care of you.”

one of her legs stretches to settle over your shoulder and you’re kissing her calf as your clits bump.

“fuck,” ellie chokes when you start rolling your hips. “fuck, wait, angel, just—”

the slip is delicious, obscene sound of your combined arousal echoing through the room to mingle with ellie’s throaty moans.

ellie’s used to watching you ride her strap, used to fucking you and giving you everything because it’s one of the things that makes her the happiest, but, fuck, she could get used to this.

“you gonna cream all over my pussy, ellie?” you whine, pace relentless as you ride her.

she lets out a breathy laugh.

“you feel how wet i am?” ellie gasps, thumb coming to nestle between your heat. the friction feels so fucking good against your clit, has you throwing your head back as you fuck her. “god, you’re fucking delusional if you think i’m not a hundred and ten percent obsessed with you.”

“oh fuck, ellie, your pussy feels s’good,” you whine, eyes watering when her other hand settles on your hip to guide you.

“does it, angel?” she moans breathily. “only you can get me like this.”

“you’re so wet, els,” you marvel. “your cunt’s so soft and so...so—”

“it’s all yours,” she whispers shakily, hips jerking because she’s close. “all yours, angel.”

and she’s crying out when you slip off of her, hands grabbing for you desperately.

she’s throwing her head back against your pillows when your lips latch onto her clit.

“oh, shit,” she moans. “wait, wait.”

but you don’t wait, in fact, your ministrations quicken, tongue lapping at the slick that gushes from ellie’s cunt.

“fuck, angel, i’m gonna—”

the broken moan that leaves ellie’s lithe body has you clenching your thighs. and you think she’s gonna cum, but her palm is firm against your forehead to push you away gently.

her eyes nearly roll to the back of her head when a string of spit webs from your chin to her clit.

“m’not cumming before you do,” she swallows. “this was supposed to be about you.”

“it is,” you assure her. “all i care about right now is making you cum.”

“jesus, you’re actually something else,” ellie sighs shakily, combing a tattooed hand through her damp locks.

you’re making a move to close in on her pussy again, but she’s pushing you onto your back, settling her achey cunt over your thigh as she circles both of your wrists in one hand.

“let me take care of you and you can do whatever you want with me for the rest of the night,” ellie promises, sloppy kiss turning into her licking into your mouth.

her fingers waste no time finding your folds, pads eager against your bud before dipping lower to tease at your entrance.

“how could you think i’d want any other pussy other than yours, angel?” she whispers against your mouth as she stuffs you knuckles deep. “this is all mine, you hear me? all fuckin’ mine.”

you nod, squirming against where she’s still got you confined with a bruising grip around your wrists.

“s’all yours, els,” you whimper.

“just like this pussy’s all yours,” she husks, hips rolling over the swell of your thigh. “would never fucking dream of giving myself to anyone but you.”

and god, ellie knows all the right things to say to have you winding tight.

you’re arching into her, jaw slack and eyes crossing as she hits that spot inside you that has you feeling fucking boneless.

“c’mon, angel,” she encourages you. “just once all over my fingers, then you can do whatever you want to me.”

the squelch has ellie’s thighs shaking as she rolls her hips, knuckles curling hard inside the warm heat of your needy pussy.

“don’t stop, els,” you beg her. “i’m gonna—”

she’s freeing your wrists, climbing from your thigh to settle on her knees at the end of the bed.

“wait, els, i’m gonna—”

and the moan that leaves you can be heard by the entire apartment block, no doubt, because ellie’s sucking your clit past her lips and eating you out like it’s the last thing she’ll ever do.

the shit she’s murmuring against your folds is filthy, has you trying to squeeze your knees together because ellie’s that good.

“ohfuckohfuckohfuck,” you cry out when she adds a third finger.

it’s all it takes because a few moments later, your back’s arching all the way off the bed, thighs vibrating as she continues to toy with you through your orgasm.

“that’s it, angel,” ellie whispers. “ride it out.”

your chest heaves through the final waves, a sheen of sweat making your dewy skin look like it’s glistening under the lowlight of your bedside lamp.

“you did so fuckin’ good for me,” ellie says gently, standing naked between your parted legs as your arm drapes over your eyes in embarrassment.

“stop hiding,” she scolds, climbing to straddle you.

her hands are wandering, smoothing over every available expanse of skin as you cover your face and shy away from her.

she’s shocked when she pries your arm away and finds tears welling in your eyes.

“babe,” she calls incredulously. “why are you—”

“we wouldn’t have been in this situation if i wasn’t so immature and just talked to you about it,” you hiccup.

ellie’s face is falling, pulling you up to wrap you in her arms.

“babe, stop,” she whines softly, rocking you as a shudder rips down your spine. “i should’ve said something and i definitely shouldn’t have acted the way i did earlier. if anything i was immature.”

“you’re such a good girlfriend, ellie,” you whimper. “and i’m...i’m sorry, i—”

“hey, hey,” she stops you firmly, peeling away from you to thumb at your chin. “don’t do that.”

and you feel like such a big fucking baby as ellie repositions the two of you so that she’s leaning against your headboard and she’s pulling you against her sweaty chest.

“i’m sorry, ellie,” you choke again.

“stop apologizing,” ellie croaks, and you realize that the emotions are welling inside of her as well. “none of this was your fault, angel. i should’ve been honest and just told you, but i was scared.”

you’re still hiccuping, ear pressed over her heart.

“you’re my first real girlfriend in a really long time, and it doesn’t help that you’re so grossly out of my league, and—”

“ellie,” you chide.

“i don’t wanna mess things up with you,” she admits softly. “especially after the way we started.”

“i’d never hold that against you,” you swallow.

“and that’s what makes it worse. i know you wouldn’t even if you should,” ellie whispers. “and then today, i saw you with someone else and it made me so fucking mad because the two of you look so good together. it made me feel like i don’t deserve you.”

“els.” and you’re crying harder now, arms winding so tight around her waist, she feels like she’ll burst.

“i’m sorry,” ellie says gently. “you’ve always been so fucking good to me and—”

you’re leaning up, kissing her to shut her up before she starts crying and she’s cradling your face like you’re the most fragile thing.

“i love you so fucking much, ellie,” you tell her between kisses. “let’s just...let’s just put this behind us, okay?”

she nods, pulls from your lips to nestle her face in your neck.

“i love you more, angel,” she murmurs against your skin. “you don’t even know.”

#ellie williams x reader #ellie williams fic #ellie williams smut #ellie williams au #ellie williams tlou #ellie williams #the last of us

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brucewaynehater101 · 1 month

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Apologies if I'm remembering wrong but I recall you posting/reblogging a post of Tim being afraid for Damian after he became Robin, thinking Red Hood would redirect his ire to him

Let's expand on that, Damian finding out about all the horrible shit Tim went through and put himself through and beginning to dread being Robin more and more but not wanting to take it back because he doesn't want to add onto Tim's pain

((and also because giving up robin would make him look week, but that's just an excuse))

So Damian is wrecked with anxiety because when is the hammer gonna drop and he'll receive what Tim did?

And if Tim's inheritance is going to be his, that means inheriting all the labor he is endures when running Wayne Enterprises, and etc

And Damian—wrong as he is—thinking himself selfish for hoping Tim stays in the family just so the day he inherits his duties comes later

Damian bonding with Tim over pain the latter experienced and the former is certain he will as well

((and also imagine what will go through Damian's head if he were to find out Tim doesn't even consider himself an actual Wayne member and just a Placeholder to keep the family from crumbling to pieces like that other post, a Placeholder until Jason and Damian came))

((and suddenly his assassination attempts seem like all for nothing and even self-sabotage, woof))

Hello! It seems that there are two of my posts you're referring to here (which is super super cool). This is going to be a long post cause it inspired me to really look at their dynamic and explore it.

One post talks about how Tim became Red Robin and didn't choose another mantle. There's a few reasons for this (like not being able to step down from his role of helping Bruce), but the reason you're referring to is another theory of mine. Tim may be Red Robin to share the burden and pain being Robin entails. He doesn't want Damian to face it alone. By being Red Robin, he can shoulder some of the ire from Batman.

The other post has Tim, who signed himself up to being Jason's placeholder both in an out of the mask, seeing himself as worthless and temporary. Both of his roles, being Jason and being Robin, got filled by Jason and Damian later.

Now that we've got the background, I absolutely love your take on this. I will add a few fics that expand on this view, but I do want to talk about it more first.

Unfortunately, Damian is used to a lot of abuse before coming to live with the Waynes (I love good mom Talia, but training to be an assassin is still abuse. She could have good reasons, but it still hurt Damian). He probably felt that he needed to earn his place and fulfill his familial role as Robin. Even as he matures and heals a bit, he may be reluctant to let Robin go. That type of training and enforced dedication to family is not simple to let go (even from a purely emotional abuse standpoint without any of the physical abuse he likely endured [This can be another thing he shares with Tim and his reluctantance to let Red Robin go]).

Kids, like Damian, will see others in similar situations and try to avoid their fate.

What is more likely? Tim is just special in being a target of isolation and abuse, or that Damian could one day be treated the same?

There's a ton of interesting theories about roles within abusive families (my family was emotionally abusive fyi). The sad part is that some of the kids will follow the example of their parents and abuse their siblings. This is both because parents model behavior and as a survival technique to not become the scapegoat like that one sibling. Damian may have joined in on being verbally abusive for both of these reasons (as well as being an extremely traumatized kid lashing out).

As he grows older and gains perspective (as well as distance from his LoA days), he may reflect on his behavior and the treatment of Tim. Tim is also the closest in age to Damian. He might be around physically more than the other siblings (besides Duke). Perhaps Duke even points out the differential treatment. There's a lot of ways that the metaphorical ball could get rolling.

This could be where Damian starts to regret his actions toward Tim. It may start from a selfish place (which, survival is not selfish and being selfish isn't always bad) of Damian realizing the assassination attempts are self-sabotage (and I love this idea and reflection on Damian). This would then morph into a genuine relationship and reliance on Tim.

I imagine, with these circumstances, that Tim becomes an anchor and safe point for Damian. All of the siblings have varying effects on the others, but this would be separate from that. While Dick is Damian's harbor, Tim would be closer to a lighthouse protecting Damian from the rocky shoreline. Dick is a place to rest and heal. Tim is a warning and guide (feel free to reblog with how the other batkids would be with Damian or each other).

Continually, Damian wanting Tim to stick around the family for his own safety hurts like hell. This casts the older sibling guilt (of leaving your siblings behind in that damn house) in a younger sibling's shame. Depending on the age, the younger sibling might be angry the older left or ashamed they want to ask in the first place. As a middle child, that fucking hurts (my situation is a bit more nuanced than that, but fuck. Ow).

Anyways, tons of angst to explore there on both of their parts.

I sincerely hope that Damian gets a life outside of WE. I hope he at least has time to explore himself (and maybe get a different career) before ever taking up WE. Depending on Tim's role in WE, this may fuck him over. I would be down to read some fics that explore Tim struggling under WE (cause he was meant for the research labs and not meeting rooms) and his refusal to step down due to the pressure that would put on Damian's shoulders (I know Tim isn't actually CEO in canon, but it's good to explore how the expectation of taking up the family business affects sibling dynamics).

Fic rec time! All are on AO3

"Exit Strategy" by smilebackwards (Tim's plan to leave the Waynes creates the ability for Damian and Tim to bond [not that Damian knows this is the plan]. Hurt ensues).

"Taming a Baby Assassin" by nighttmr (Tim, after being notified that he's getting a younger sibling with Damian, decides he'll be a big brother regardless of the effort required).

"Some Common Ground" by Do_wa_diddy (Both Damian and Tim are used to cruel standards of training. The others do not understand this and try to limit how they train. This causes Tim and Damian to bond).

"Just Like the Movies" by faithms (Damian finds a flash drive of all the times Bruce has been horrible to Tim).

"The Study of Birds" by MaskoftheRay (Tim and Damian find a common interest in bird watching. It shows them slowly becoming closer despite the obstacles).

Last one:

"You'll Change Your Name or Change Your Mind (previous title: Tim Drake Learns to Set Boundaries)" series by samsamiam.

I wholeheartedly recommend this series. Basically, Tim sets boundaries for himself while offering Damian sanctuary (should the kid need). It becomes Tim protecting Damian even from Bruce. Very very very good.

#dc comics #dc universe #tim drake #damian wayne #damian wayne angst #tim and damian #tim drake angst #thank you for the ask!!!!

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ganondoodle · 13 days

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yeah no of course i cant stop trying still ...

currently trying to get out of the mindset -draw what could be popular- by designing some rough ideas for the weapons shops in the new totk rewrite (fuse isnt a thing here)

to explain; during the first part (before villain rauru reveal and change to shiekah arm) the way to repair or craft weapons is with a new type of NPCs; they are smiths that can repair your weapons, craft them, and have some avaible to buy (mostly for arrows but also small selection of weapons), it costs material and some money, or if you dont have the material/all material, it costs more money but is still doable, price depending on how valuable or hard to get the material is you dont want to spend on it

then after the switch to the sheikah arm and zelda taking on the role of your permanent companion, she can both repair and craft as well (might be limited but expandable with quests, as in that zelda learns more skills- so theres new quests after the switch and you cant just do everything before that) with the difference that you need to have the required materials but it costs no money

this would mean that while no giant change before and after the halfway point of the game, it is definitely different feeling, plus its a convenience that is good to have in the second half but shouldnt be sorely missed in the first, the difference between NPC smith and zelda gives you the option to spend material or money- so you arent forced to grind anything if you need either for something else, plus new quest rewards for the second half and new points of interest in general, similar to a stable but not too close so theres still an element of exploration; they arent super frequent but around the map of the surface enough that you can reasonably reach one in each region (perhaps after aquiring the yiga as allies/or before that in disguise they can do the same for you but are only found in the underground)

it would also allow for more diverse gameplay, if your favorite weapon is about to break (it might not fully disappear but if you use it up it would go into a condition like the master sword when its lost its power, not usable or doing tiny amount of damage, but not gone forever if you accidentally use it too much-) you can decide to throw it away or keep it until you find the next smith, depending on if you already found one and see you are close or havent yet, or spend the material if you have it to instantly repair it

(i havent decided yet if rauru might be willing to repair your weapons, but not to craft them since he lacks the skill (would never admit to it) and he only wants to give you just enough support to enable you to do what he wants you to do- i think that might work better bc its still a difference to zelda, since she can craft too, but not too much so that you would feel like the games forcing you to use the smiths in the first half ... possibly its unlocked with one of the enigma stones, when rauru can claim he is able to do that now bc it lets him recover some of his strength)

what im wondering now, which is a bit important i think, is .. should the smiths be wandering around a set path or have a lil stationary shop? if they wander around it would make it a bit more depending on situation of you wanna use them, but bears the risk of making it annoying if you dont know here they are or happen to be too far away and a lil weird bc should have something to work on there, like an anvil, which would be a lil strange to carry around; a lil shop could potentially turn into a location you keep teleporting back and forth though im leaning towards the shop; you could make helping them build it a quest too, or saving them from monsters? overall i think this idea is a rather nice balance

#ganondoodles talks #zelda #ganondoodles rewrites totk #the smiths are of different species too #one of them will be a hammerhead shark zora #bc i think thats funny

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reds-skull · 2 months

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Fanfic Recommendations: Writers

I thought of making this kind of list for a while now, since in my notes I save writers when I like most/all their fics (instead of saving each work individually)

This list is going to be very long, I'm gonna try to add to each writer a little description of the type of work they usually write.

Should leave this as a disclaimer for all my fic rec posts, but always look at the tags and CW on each fic before reading!

As always, if a link doesn't work, you're welcome to reach out!

[This list will include both SFW and NSFW writers, since a lot of them do both]

thirteenbullets - Writer of Anytime You Need Me, basically the ultimate hurt/comfort series. [fun fact, part 6 was the first fic I read in this fandom, and I partially blame how good it was for how fast I got obsessed with cod lol]

mothbeast - Writer of Pattern Breaker, one of the more well known fics for ghostsoap (for a good reason!). Love their other fics as well [some are NSFW]

glaciers (Hayfever_Street) - Non AU fics, where they put ghost and soap and various situations for angst! [some NSFW]

Red_Clegane - non AU and AU fics, some of the best non-military AUs I've read. All of their fics share a similar taste, but they're all equally good, so if you like that style you'll enjoy most of them [some NSFW]

sauceboss_yahoo - AUs with supernatural elements, and non-military AUs. Some a/b/o if that's your style [which obviously means there's some NSFW]

yourvaliants - AO3 account of valiants on Tumblr, I'll expand more when I get to Tumblr users, but this is just their place to post NSFW comics since Tumblr doesn't allow that.

wayfaredsoldier - non-military AUs, AUs with supernatural elements, and in canon universe [some NSFW]

MildLimerence - If you want smut with good plot, this is the writer for you haha. They have several soulmate AUs and fantasy/supernatural AUs, as well as canon universe [mostly NSFW]

Arodana - supernatural AUs and non-military AUs, very enjoyable long works [some NSFW]

crown_twist - a mix of NSFW and hurt/comfort oneshots, if you're in the mood for something short and good this is the writer for you [some NSFW]

ElizaStyx - mostly oneshots for a variety of pairings, a mix of NSFW and fluff [some NSFW]

Sillililli - Canon and non-military AUs, with just a pinch of NSFW [little NSFW]

Louffox - Canon and non-military AUs, a lot of angst and hurt/comfort. A few longer works and a good amount of oneshots [some NSFW]

kcisbroken [previously artbykc0001] - Historical AUs, sometimes MCD, some non AU oneshots and NSFW [some NSFW]

Hochseeperle - non AUs, angst and hurt/comfort, with NSFW [some NSFW]

eggtimelads - Supernatural AUs, non AUs, oneshots that literally changed my brain chemistry (not clickbait) [some NSFW]

blackbird_flyaway - supernatural and non AUs, recently started a zombie AU (that I just discovered and go read it after finishing this lmao) [Some NSFW]

TheLastTheosaurus - hurt/comfort oneshots. Good ol' reliable [no NSFW]

Nuria123 - absolutely amazing non AU, non-military AUs, and fics so emotional they made me full on sob. A mix of oneshots and longer works [some NSFW]

AvaLoren - non-military, non AU, and a little bit of fantasy, and medieval AUs, mostly oneshots with some longer fics [some NSFW]

WhisperedWords12 - non-military, non AU, and a little bit of fun shifter AU, many oneshots that are mostly NSFW [a lot of NSFW]

Wheezing_Joe - non AU, oneshots with some onehsot series, hurt/comfort and angst galore. Very nice stuff [no NSFW]

coderaven - non-military AUs and non AUs, emotional hurt/comfort, a little supernatural AUs [some NSFW]

oh_ellie - non AUs, hurt/comfort, and a whole lot of smut [mostly NSFW]

headlocket - author of all that's said in the low light. I don't need to say anything else, if you didn't read it yet, you really REALLY should! [little NSFW]

Grangers_apprentice - [note: majority of works locked for users with no AO3 accounts] non-AU, supernatural AUs, some oneshots and some longer works with series. A bit of a/b/o if that's your style [some NSFW]

DarkMoonMaiden - non AU, hurt/comfort and smut. Mostly oneshot, some series [mostly NSFW]

merikai - non AU and non-military AUs, hurt/comfort and angst oneshots [no NSFW]

simcoehole - supernatural but military and non AUs, mostly smut [mostly NSFW]

Epifauna - non AU oneshots, a lot of fluff with some angst [little NSFW]

prettyunhinged - non AU oneshots (some as long as multi chapter works though), angst, fluff and smut [some NSFW]

oshikiri_toru - non-military and non AUs, with some supernatural elements. Very long oneshots with angst and smut. Very underrated writer imo! [some NSFW]

xEclipse - non AU, fluff and smut oneshots that can get very sweet [some NSFW]

unravelledorfrayed - non AU, misunderstanding hurt/comfort (the good kind) [no NSFW]

lkst - very unique AUs, as well as non AUs. A bit of smut and a lot of angst [little NSFW]

now, there are some blogs here that write a lot of little drabbles that are always a treat to read, so I'm also gonna add some of them.

cod-dump - mostly non AU, with the exception of the Teen!Ghost AU.

forestshadow-wolf - AU and non-AU, also has many downloaded fics for you to read (they're a lifesaver when AO3 is down)

valiants - as mentioned above, comic artist and occasional writer, honestly a huge inspiration for me, it terms of storytelling and art style.

ghcstao3 - also has an AO3, wanted to put them here because they post a lot of drabbles here that don't get posted on AO3.

captain-mj - also has an AO3, like ghcst posts a lot of fics here that don't get posted on AO3. Many are NSFW, as a heads-up.

That's all for now, in the future if I make fic recs for longer works, you will probably see some from these writers.

#call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod mw2 #fic recs #not art #ghostsoap #soapghost #ghoap #i put links for blog bc i didnt want to tag everyone #doing this instead of uni work bc i really dont feel like doing it :DDD

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twstgarden · 6 months

Text

❀ ❝ 𝘁𝗼 𝗺𝘆 𝗱𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘁 𝗰𝗼-𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿 ❞

━ actor! dorm leaders (minus kalim) x fem! actor! reader (reader can either be yuu or an oc/twstsona) ━ as a well-known performer, you have worked with several actors and actresses in several movies and series, but your relationship with them was always professional and platonic. however, one actor made you feel butterflies while you were shooting a scene with them. (f/n means first name)

do not steal or translate without my permission.

— 𝙧𝙞𝙙𝙙𝙡𝙚 𝙧𝙤𝙨𝙚𝙝𝙚𝙖𝙧𝙩𝙨 —

today's news: riddle rosehearts and f/n l/n to star together in the newest lawyer romance film — will they be our new on-screen love interests?

co-starring with riddle rosehearts in this new legal drama film was not what you expected this year. yes, you have worked alongside this actor in several shows, one of them being a tv series inspired by a mobile game called twisted wonderland.

you weren't typically known as a performer in legal drama films, but it isn't so bad to expand your repertoire, no?

so here you were in the movie studio, seated politely as the hair and make-up artists started touching you up for your next scene. riddle was seated as well; his own hair and make-up artists were touching him up while he rehearsed his lines under his breath.

riddle rosehearts was the diligent, serious type of actor. come to think of it, he does have similarities with the character he plays in twisted wonderland, but he does know how to have fun from time to time.

like his role in twisted wonderland, riddle also loves hedgehogs, and he would sometimes scold another co-star, ace trappola, if he messes around the studio too much and disrupt the shooting sessions.

however, now, he was the only actor from twisted wonderland in this set — aside from you, of course.

"alright, picture is up!"

the voice of the assistant director caught both of your attention as you thanked the hair and make-up artists before approaching the movie set. you stood in your position and did some soft breathing exercises to help calm your nerves a little bit before the scene started.

you were playing the role of a lawyer fresh out of law school, while riddle also plays the role of a lawyer but is your character's senior. that said, riddle's character is the youngest top lawyer in the law firm and this specific scene you were shooting is when your character tries to take riddle's character out to relax after overworking so much in the firm.

"action!"

and with that, the two of you were in character. your character's desk was next to riddle's as you sat on your chair. you turned to face riddle as you spoke, "hey, mister rosehearts... do you always stay in the firm overtime?"

"yes."

what a curt answer, but ah, it was part of the script.

"do you ever leave the firm?" you asked with a raised brow, looking at the clock prop and seeing that there are 15 minutes before you could clock out. "it's not like i live here," responded riddle, "but yes, i do tend to stay late in the office especially when there are plenty of cases i need to handle."

"woah~ you're really amazing, mister rosehearts. no wonder you're the top lawyer in this firm," you responded, leaning back on your chair as you looked at your co-star while he typed random things on the computer before him to pretend his character was working.

"but..." you trailed off as you moved closer to him with the use of your rolling chair. once you were beside riddle, you spoke your next line, "being the best lawyer in this firm doesn't mean you have to overwork yourself. how about i take you to a patisserie so you could unwind and relax? take your mind off work, sir!"

riddle then looked at you with a serious expression, but you can tell that his character was conveying both disbelief at your character for suggesting such a thing and curiosity about your character's actions. this junior wish to make their senior live life outside of the four corners of the law firm?

"...miss l/n, don't you have any cases to work on?"

"i've revised them already, and we have..." you looked up at the clock prop, "10 minutes before we clock out. come onnn, it'll be fun!" riddle sighed and shrugged as he placed both arms on the armrest, "just this once."

"cut!"

the assistant director's voice made you and riddle sigh softly as you broke character for a bit. the director then held the megaphone as he spoke, "that was great, you two. however, i'd like for you to repeat the last portion, starting from the line, "don't you have any cases to work on?", alright?"

"yes, director," responded riddle as he let out a heavy breath to calm himself. you smiled at him and patted his shoulder, "you got this, riddle." the red-haired male smiled at you as he nodded, "yes, thank you, f/n."

"ready? action!"

"miss l/n, don't you have any cases to work on?" riddle asked in a stern tone as he looked at your character with a bored expression. you frowned a little as you spoke, "i've revised them already, mister rosehearts! and besides, we have around 10 minutes before we clock out... come on~ it'll be fun!"

riddle continued typing on the keyboard, but you could see the computer was turned off. luckily, that wasn't seen on camera. riddle sighed and leaned back on his office chair, placing his arms on the armrest as he looked at you with that same bored expression.

"fine. just this once."

"annnnd cut! that was perfect! alright, moving on!" spoke the director as you and riddle stood up, your hair and make-up artists approaching you and working on touching up your appearance while the crew worked on changing the scenery of the movie set.

during all these preparations for the next scene, you sat beside riddle and looked at the script on his hands while he kept rehearsing his lines under his breath. since it would take a while before your next shot, you spoke to him, "hey, how about i help you?"

riddle glanced at you and handed his script with a smile, "sure, no problem. thank you, f/n..." you nodded with a smile and held his script as you started rehearsing with him, "alright, i'll start with my line and we can go from there... ahem... mister rosehearts, isn't this patisserie wonderful? there are plenty of delicious treats in here!"

"indeed. you are quite fond of them, miss l/n," spoke riddle as you gave him a thumbs up to indicate he perfectly said his line.

"mhm! they're amazing...! then, our characters take a seat, drink on some beverages, though i'm quite sure they'll just hand us water with some food colouring..." you commented, which earned a chuckle from riddle, "then it'll be your line!"

"right, uh... miss l/n, how do you like being a lawyer so far?"

"mister rosehearts, we're here so we can relax, not think of work, you know? but i would say i enjoy it... it is quite stressful, yes, but the satisfaction we get at the end of the cases that went well feels rewarding..." you responded, holding the script and eyeing it intently.

"i see... that makes sense. if you ever feel overwhelmed, you can always ask me for a helping hand. you're a diligent and honest person and i see a lot of potential in you... you're making us proud."

ah.

it's just a line from the script. it's just a line from the script.

you're a professional performer. you shouldn't mix these lines up with reality.

but... the way riddle said it gave you butterflies. you cleared your throat to try and brush off your slightly flustered state, nodding to indicate that he said his line right.

due to your flustered state, you did not notice the way riddle smiled at you. there was a hint of adoration and fondness in his eyes that went unnoticed by you, it was as if he was speaking as both his character and himself.

"alright, uh... thank you, mister rosehearts."

you smiled at riddle and handed back the script to him as he thanked you. feeling his hand brush against yours as he grabbed the script made you feel butterflies again. what was going on?

well, whatever it was, you tried to best to ignore it.

and even if riddle had not noticed your flustered state, other people have.

"riddle rosehearts and f/n l/n to star in the newest lawyer romance film, on-screen love interests or off-screen sweethearts?" mumbled the production assistant to the executive producer as they both giggled amongst themselves.

— 𝙡𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙖 𝙠𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙖𝙧 —

distinguished guests of tonight's show! here we have one of the world-famous celebrity couples in set joining us today! let's welcome leona kingscholar and f/n l/n!

the production phase of the sports film that you and leona co-starred in had just finished and you two were now attending talk shows and interviews to talk about the movie, your lives, and so on. on this specific night, you and leona were invited as guests to the popular late-night talk show called the diamond night show.

the host? it's one of your co-stars in the mobile game-inspired series called twisted wonderland, cater diamond.

"hello, everyone! welcome to the diamond night show!"

as soon as cater spoke, the crowd went wild. he had a lively audience despite running this show at around midnight. cater always had this charm on him that just energizes people.

"we have two very special guests tonight, i'm sure you all would be totes hyped as i am to see them! let's welcome... the celebrity couple that made us believe love is still in the air tonight... leona kingscholar and f/n l/n!!!"

and again, the crowd went wild, but this was both of your cues to enter the scene. you and leona went up on the stage and waved to the crowd as you sat on the couch beside cater's desk. the orange-haired fellow smiled at the sight of you and leona as he spoke, "leona, f/n! hey, it's been a while!"

you greeted cater with a friendly smile, "cay-kun! how have you been? wow, a late-night talk show, huh?"

leona merely gave cater a nod as he spoke, "been a while."

you and cater chuckled as the orange-haired host replied, "it has been a while since twisted wonderland ended its series, so i found the time to start my own late-night talk show! it's been fun having the rest of our co-stars here from time to time. anyway, enough about that, how are things with you two?"

"uhh... well, well... we've been well..." you and leona replied in unison as the crowd laughed a bit.

"wow~ you two have this chemistry that is noticeable even when we were filming twisted wonderland way back then!" commented cater as the crowd went wild.

"if it was that obvious back then, i guess i can see why f/n and i are considered to be an on-screen couple," spoke leona as you laughed softly. "i remember when we had to retake a lot of scenes because i couldn't stop laughing at leona," you added, which made cater laugh.

"because i wasn't used to seeing him so grumpy all the time!" you spoke in a lighthearted tone while laughing, "but i can also see that his character in twisted wonderland has similarities to who he is as a person."

"you have similarities with your character, too," replied leona as he snickered.

"anyway, congratulations to you two for the success of your latest movie!" cheered cater as the crowd went wild again. you and leona smiled and thanked them as you spoke first, "ah, yes... it was fun to film this movie, everyone was so nice and they're all working hard. i'm happy to know that the movie was a success."

"i'd say that aside from twisted wonderland, shooting this movie was one of the best experiences i had," added leona as cater nodded. "i heard the crew and the cast were having a great time during the making of this movie, although it can be stressful at times."

"yes, yes, well... i'm sure every making of the movie has its stressful times, so that wouldn't be a surprise, but i'd say the lighthearted moments were really the most memorable ones," you replied.

"before we dig deeper into that, i, along with the rest of the crowd and the people watching back home, want to know... are you two actually a couple?" cater spoke as his voice went gradually a softer tone as he asked that question. the crowd yelled and cheered about how they were curious to know the truth, which made you and leona glance at one another with a smile.

you then looked at cater and nodded, responding nonchalantly as if it wasn't a big deal, "yeah, we are."

and again, the crowd went wild, but even louder than earlier.

"woah, since when?! what made you realize you liked each other?" asked cater as he now grew curious. "it realized i got a crush on leona during our filming session of twisted wonderland's second season... but i was too shy to admit it."

"and i realized i got a crush on them during the filming session of twisted wonderland's pilot episode..." added leona as you looked at him with a smile.

"ah, the pilot episode that was never released?" asked cater, which made you and leona nod.

...

"okay, picture's up! we're recording in 3..." spoke the assistant director as you and leona stood in your respective positions. once the camera and audio were recording, you started to get into character. grim, who was just a plushie edited by cgi, started his line.

"hey, take a look at this! it looks like there are tons of fruits in here! they smell so good!" spoke grim's voice actor as you started to walk down the botanical garden, intentionally stepping on what seemed to be leona's tail.

"ow!" shrieked leona as he hissed and glared at you and the grim plushie, "hey. you've got guts stepping on someone's tail without apologizing." grim then replied, "are you the guy tending to this place? you look scary..."

leona clicked his tongue in annoyance as he mumbled, "I went here thinking i can take a nice nap, but my tail gets stepped on. this is the worst." you scoffed to yourself and looked away, mumbling softly, "it's your fault for sticking your tail out on the path in the first place..."

leona raised a brow at your words, eyeing you up and down as he remarked, "ah, i saw you at the entrance ceremony." he then leaned out next to your ear as he sniffed your scent, making you freeze on the spot as instructed in the script.

however, the proximity was suddenly making your heart race. you could smell his perfume; his fragrant scent was pleasing, and you liked it. his eyes trailed all over your figure with that small smirk on his face that his character usually uses. you know it's just acting, but you can't deny how attractive he looks.

oh, surely, you weren't falling for your co-star.

"i don't smell a spark of magic in you. i'm not going to pick a fight with a weakling," spoke leona before he turned around and left, just as the script had instructed.

"━cut!"

suddenly, the assistant director's voice echoed loudly throughout the studio while the director sighed. "this doesn't seem right... we'll revise the script. the actors can take a rest for a moment."

once you sat on your chair, you let out a huge sigh which caught cater's attention. he looked at you and tilted his head, "you good, girl? you seem spooked."

you stayed silent for a moment, biting the inside of your cheek as you sighed heavily once more, "i just... feel weird lately." you then dismissed yourself with a smile as you told cater not to worry about it.

...

"ohh! i see, i remember that! haha, i really thought you were sick for a moment, n/n! but you just caught the feels," spoke cater as his words made the crowd laugh a little in response, "it's really a pleasure to see you two again, lovebirds! hehe, we all hope you guys will end up getting married and having adorable little babies!"

the crowd went wild.

and you? flustered. leona chuckled at your reaction as he placed an arm around your shoulder before looking at cater, "you all better look forward to it." once again, the crowd screamed with joy before they started chanting a combination of both your names - a ship name, you could say.

━ 𝙖𝙯𝙪𝙡 𝙖𝙨𝙝𝙚𝙣𝙜𝙧𝙤𝙩𝙩𝙤 ━

studio gossip says two certain performers have a chemistry that makes them so perfect for each other! everyone and their pets ship them~

another day of filming, another day of hearing giggles around the studio. you were in the hair and make-up area as the hair stylist started fixing your hair. your other co-stars were busy touching up as well, while the others were revising their lines or drinking some water and doing vocal exercises.

suddenly, the voices of the assistant director and the production assistant caught your attention as they gossiped amongst themselves by the door, which happened to be near where you were seated.

"don't you think our film's male and female lead have good chemistry?" spoke the assistant director as she chuckled while the production assistant nodded with a laugh.

"totally! i have worked in many films, but this year's movie actors totally have great chemistry on-screen or off-screen. i bet they'd be a couple soon," replied the production assistant as you blushed a little upon hearing their words.

you. you were the female lead.

your current project is a corporate-centred film about your character returning to the workforce for the first time after a long break. an adult woman from the lands of the east migrating to the west for career opportunities ends up becoming employed in one of the world's most known corporations, and she happens to land a job as the chief operating officer and works closely with the corporate's ceo.

from what you have read the brief, the film mostly focuses on the struggles of your character and how corporate jobs have the tendency to demand a lot from one person, but it can get rewarding at the end of the day. there were also implied hints of romance, so there's that.

now, it all seemed great until you have been partnered up with one of the industry's well-known businessman and actor, who also happens to be your co-star in a series long ago - azul ashengrotto.

you have been familiar with him. he was your co-star in twisted wonderland, but it has been a few years since you've worked with him after the end of twisted wonderland. though you felt excited at the thought of meeting with an old friend, you also felt nervous at the thought of acting those lovey-dovey scenes with him.

"anyway, we better head back and start filming scene 50." the voice of the assistant director brought you back to reality as the hair stylist smiled at you while looking at your reflection. "you're all set, ma'am!" exclaimed your hair stylist as you smiled and thanked her before heading to the set.

"okay! so, for scene fifty, i'm sure you all know what to do... let's adjust the camera... picture's up!" spoke the assistant director as the cameraman fixed the angle of the camera, "okay... action!"

the set was designed to look like your office as you sat on the executive chair, looking through the papers as if you were working, noticing that the papers on your desk were just random articles that were made for the sake of the prop.

the scene starts with you sighing as you go through the prop documents, supposedly analyzing the reports sent by each department's head and jotting down all the ideas that your character had in mind to set a new policy in the corporation.

the door then opened as azul walked in, making you stand up as you spoke in surprise, "sir, i wasn't expecting you to come to my office... you could have rung me up and i'll head to yours." azul shook his head and smiled at you, remembering all his lines as always. he walked towards you until you were both standing across one another, with only your executive table blocking his path, "how are you liking the job so far?"

your expression shifted to that of surprise as told by the script, "oh, i... like it a lot. i'm adjusting well. thank you for checking in..." azul still had that smile on his face before looking around the room, the glass walls were covered by the roller shades, not allowing anyone to look into your office as it gave you complete privacy.

"now, business is business. i'm sure you know that, l/n..." trailed azul as you nodded, "however, i am reaching out to you right now as an individual, not as your boss." you raised a brow in response before he grabbed an envelope from the inner pocket of his suit and handing it to you.

you then grabbed it and the first thing that caught your attention were the words, 'you are invited'. you looked up at him to see azul still smiling, "there's a party going on this friday, and it's rather for personal reasons. a family member of mine is hosting an engagement party and i was invited. i was told it is a... prom-themed engagement party, perhaps to recreate the first date or so."

"so... you're inviting me?" you asked.

"yes... the invitation indicated that each person could bring a plus one, and i thought of inviting you. i want to get to know you more, l/n, if you'd let me," spoke azul before he leaned forward to bow a little, making you surprised as you had never seen him like that before.

you grew flustered.

this was not part of the script, so you tried to calm yourself, but you knew your flustered state was seen on camera. azul was a little curious about your reaction since he knew your character was only supposed to smile and say yes, but you were full-on blushing.

unbeknownst to you and your co-star, the director and the assistant director looked at one another with knowing smiles.

due to your flustered state, you were a little delayed in your response as you accidentally stuttered your lines out, "i-i... um... s-sure! yes, i'll go with you, then... ah! i'm so sorry!"

you covered your red face as giggles erupted from the room as the cameraman paused the recording. azul laughed as well before looking at the director, "i think she's falling in love, director!"

"the way you say it really made me flustered!" you exclaimed with a smile and a dark blush as you grew embarrassed. the assistant director and the director looked at each other once more before the latter spoke, "i see a new relationship blooming~ they'd totally grab the headlines."

━ 𝙫𝙞𝙡 𝙨𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙚𝙣𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙩 ━

this just in, actor and model vil schoenheit to star in the upcoming romance film with twisted wonderland co-star and rumoured partner, f/n l/n.

the news of your new project with vil has been spreading like wildfire. of course, you remained professional and did not care about the circulating rumours about you two dating and whatnot, you had a career to focus on and so did he.

filming the romance film was as sensational as it has always been. it was pleasant to work with vil, his level of professionalism and his acting skills always made you admire him. how can a man so beautiful be so talented as well? he’s like a perfect package, at least, to you and to his fans.

you were currently taking interviews with vil at the red carpet right after the evening award show. you have been surrounded by paparazzi and newscasters, wanting to get even a slice of the news and report it to the public.

“f/n! vil! what can you say about your upcoming film?!” spoke one of the newscasters as they held the mic towards you two. you and vil gave them a smile as you spoke kindly, “all i can say is it is something to look forward to. vil and i have both expressed our enthusiasm in the release of ‘a love untold’, and… it will make you cry; it will make you swoon, and it will help you realise how lucky you are to have someone loving you unconditionally.”

“similar to miss f/n’s statement, i can attest that a love untold is something you all can look forward to. we have done our very best and gave our all in the filming and production of this movie,” added vil as the others in the crowd started screaming and swooning.

soon, the release of your movie was made public and you were in your home, reading to relax for the evening until you heard two of your property caretakers squealing in the kitchen. you stood up from the couch and walked towards the direction of your squealing caretakers and noticed they were watching your film through their device whilst chopping some vegetables for dinner.

the current scene playing on their device made you pause a bit as you watched by the door.

…

“if you’re tired, then rest and let me handle everything. if you’re tired of carrying the burdens, then lean on me for support. i’m always ready to support you with open arms and you know that,” spoke vil as he was in-character.

your teary expression flashed by the screen as it started raining. the setting was the streets on a rainy night right outside your character’s house. vil wrapped his arms around you as you continued to sob your lines out for dramatic effect.

“i’m sorry,” you sobbed, “it’s just that my parents– “

“your parents do not know how many nights you spent crying because you think you’re not good enough. it’s time to set boundaries … i can’t let you do this to yourself any longer,” whispered vil as he caressed your hair and held you in an embrace, not caring if he was drenched in the rain – which was actually regular water pouring through a garden watering pot.

you then looked up to meet his gaze as he wiped your tears away, smiling softly at you.

…

you smiled to yourself as you watched the scene. you had enjoyed filming that part, albeit there was a lot of giggles right after the scene was cut due to you and vil getting drenched, as well as a blooper scene where the water in the pot ran out in the middle of a dramatic scene.

that scene made you think about your relationship with vil. he was always there for you ever since you started your journey in show business, and he was always supportive of your goals and ambitions.

deciding to give him some appreciation, you walked away from the kitchen door and back into the lounge as you grabbed your phone and sent vil a quick text.

‘darling, if i have not said this enough, i love you and i appreciate you.’

it was true that you and vil were dating. none of you denied the allegations, after all.

━ 𝙞𝙙𝙞𝙖 𝙨𝙝𝙧𝙤𝙪𝙙 ━

this is your daily dose of celebrity gossip! idia shroud and f/n l/n have been spotted together in the game fest yesterday! dating rumours have spiked after photo evidence of the two together has been leaked to the media.

‘n/n’

‘f/n’

‘f/n l/n’

the continuous beeping notifications of your device woke you up from your slumber as you groaned and grabbed it, wondering what was so urgent at 6 in a saturday morning. you unlocked your phone to see several messages from idia, a fellow actor and your previous co-star in the series twisted wonderland.

all his messages were mostly your nickname and your name, as well as a few messages saying, ‘wake up’ and ‘we’re trending!!!’. you raised a brow and replied to his messages, asking him what was going on, that it was so early in the morning, and if he ever slept at all.

he then sent you a link to a social media post that had a video of the entertainment news featuring you and idia. what made your eyes widen was the picture shown. it was a photo of you and idia dressed in casualwear, smiling at one another with a bunch of giant plushies in hand.

it was a photo from yesterday. you two were completely unaware that people recognized you and took photos of you both.

…

“look! there’s a virtual reality corner over there!” you exclaimed, excitement laced in your tone as you tugged on idia’s arm and pointed at the vr gaming area. he quickly looked at the direction you’re pointing at. the sunglasses you both wore made everything seem tinted, but you did not mind as it is necessary to hide your identity.

the last thing you wanted was people to recognize you both and spread rumours.

you and idia were here as mere individuals, not as an actress and actor, not as superstars. you wanted to enjoy your night after shooting some scenes in the morning, and the game festival was the perfect place for you and idia to wind down and have fun.

you two had the night of your lives, enjoying yourselves to the fullest in the gaming festival.

perhaps, you two enjoyed too much that you did not realise someone snuck a picture of the two of you as soon as your hoods fell and revealed both of your hair tied into a ponytail, and idia was very recognizable with that blue hair of his.

…

“oh… my… god…” you mumbled under your breath in shock as you stared at the video playing on your screen. ‘once again, this is your daily dose of celebrity gossip! let’s hope and wait for either one of them to confirm that they are indeed dating!’

those were the last words you heard before the video ended. you still stared in disbelief, not knowing what to do or what to say and you knew your talent manager will immediately start asking you about it once they see this video.

you quickly replied to idia, ‘what do we do?’

‘i don’t know…’ replied idia.

‘should we go public?’ you asked, typing rapidly as you felt your heart beating loudly.

‘we’d get endless interviews,’ responded the man.

you sighed to yourself as you continued texting him until you both came to a conclusion to let the rumours be for a while as it will eventually die out. your managers said the same thing as well, to let the rumours be and it will eventually die out.

it did not.

days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and months turned into a year. surely, people aren’t that interested in your love life? you had expected it to die out and people would move on, but no matter how long you told yourself that, the rumours seemed to spike even more.

eventually, you and idia came out to the public and confirmed the dating rumours going around and, much to idia’s discomfort, several interviews have piled up one after the other, completely interested in knowing the timeline of your relationship and whatnot.

‘ladies and gentlemen, it has been confirmed by the couple themselves that they are indeed a pair! f/n l/n and idia shroud have made their confirmation to the public during the wonderland award show!’

━ 𝙢𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙪𝙨 𝙙𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙖 ━

sensational sparks: malleus draconia and f/n l/n set to ignite screens in anticipated romance film.

working with the renowned malleus draconia felt like an honour – to you, at least. he was well-known throughout the industry as a charmingly mysterious and talented actor, not uttering a lot about himself but is known to be respectful to everyone he meets.

starring with him in twisted wonderland was great. his character in the series is quite like his real personality that you couldn’t help but think he was not acting at all. years have passed since twisted wonderland ended and you two had pursued your own paths in acting, taking up different genres of projects to play in to discover yourself.

you had not expected your fates to cross again, and you were a little shy to establish a connection with him that runs deeper than an acquaintance or a co-worker, so you were left to accept that you’d probably just admire him from afar.

however, it seems fate was playing cards and luck was on your side. you had accepted a new project wherein you play the female lead in a historical romance movie. according to the script sent to you, the movie was set in the late 1800s and your character was a princess from another kingdom who was betrothed to the crown prince and the story tackles their romantic adventure and how they learn to love each other unconditionally.

pretty much like a regular romance movie with a twist of history, you did not mind, and you’d gladly play the part of a princess even if it was just for a movie.

you did not think much of it until you were told by the director that the leading man – the man playing the role of the prince – was malleus draconia himself. you could not respond for a few seconds due to shock, which worried the director, but you reassured him everything is alright, and you’d gladly work with him.

upon arriving at the set, you greeted malleus with a smile, and he gave you a polite one in return. filming the first scene was great and no mistakes were made. you had everything under control, or so you hoped.

once the first romance scene came, you tried to keep clam as you stood by the desk as malleus approached you, his tall figure towering over you as he spoke in a deep tone, “…if you have any qualms about marrying me, speak now.”

“what…?” you spoke, memorizing your lines.

“once you sign the marriage contract, there is no going back. i want to make sure both of our kingdoms will be in a stable condition, so i want to prevent any case of annulment or divorce. if you have any doubts, now is your chance to back out and we can both pretend this transaction never existed,” replied malleus as he spoke out his lines word for word all to a tee.

‘he’s so incredible… his eyes look lovely up close… his eyelashes are pretty long, too… ah, wait… my line!’

“u-um… i have no doubts. i’ll marry you.”

it was not your intention to stutter as you spoke your lines, but the director did not seem to mind it as he let the scene continue. you two continued to shoot the other scenes and you had one last scene to film for the day before you could go back to your home to rest then come back again the next day for the next filming session.

“okay, this is the last scene for the day. picture’s up! annnd… action!” spoke the assistant director as the camera started rolling and you and malleus immediately went into character.

malleus wrapped his arms around your waist as he held you close. your cheeks were red but you tried to tone down your flustered state as he whispered, “shall we?” you nodded as he held your hand and started dancing with you. the current setting of the scene was in a ballroom and you were dolled up in a ballgown, dancing around the set with malleus as music played through the speakers.

at the moment, it seemed like everything else did not matter. you forgot that you were acting out a scene, you forgot that you were an actress, you forgot that you were merely playing a role with malleus in this movie. all you could see was the way his eyes scanned your figure as he held your hand in a tight but not painful manner, as he settled his hand on your waist and eventually moved them across your back to pull you closer to him.

your feet moved on their own as you danced across the ballroom studio with malleus, looking deep into his eyes. time stood still and all you knew was the handsome man in front of you, dressed in a princely attire and holding you close to him.

it seemed even he noticed your trance and smirked a little as he whispered, “did i take your breath away?”

you snapped out of your thoughts, wondering why he said that when it wasn’t a part of the script, but you did not care. you gave him a bashful smile as your cheeks went rosy once more, “you could say that…”

once the music stopped, his touch immediately parted away from your skin, making you frown a little, but you did not want to make it obvious. you two gave each other a respectful bow and the director immediately cut the scene.

you sighed in relief and smiled at malleus, thanking him for the wonderful performance and complimenting his acting. “you did great today…” you spoke, albeit still a little bashful. malleus smiled and thanked you for your kindness before returning the same compliment, “thank you. you were as wonderful as you have always been, miss f/n.”

meanwhile, the director and the assistant director glanced at one another with knowing smiles before looking back at the cameraman, giving them a thumbs-up as if to confirm that the camera was still rolling and intended to include the tape in the behind-the-scenes.

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sexcromancy · 3 months

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young adult, new adult, and fantasy fiction: the audience of a book is who reads it

title clumsily based on the purpose of a system is what it does.

before we begin, I want to focus a bit on defining our terms. young adult, new adult, adult, science fiction/fantasy, speculative fiction, contemporary romance - all of the terms I will use in this post are created by marketing companies and readers, and all of them have fuzzy and subjective applicability to any given book. there is no objectivity in cataloging, which is the lens through which I approach knowledge organization projects like this. there is no definitive answer to what any given book or genre "is", because these categories are not fixed values. instead, their values are expanded and developed by what gets placed in which category, by whom, and what criteria they base that decision on. that's what I want to discuss.

to provide some context: debates over age categories and who is reading what books for which age ranges currently dominate discussions among publishers, authors, librarians, and readers. ages of characters in YA are skewing up, sales are slowing down. young adult as a category has existed for 50+ years, but it is currently undergoing some growing pains. here's one more article for good measure. new adult is a term created by the publishing industry in 2009, which developed in fits and starts despite multiple bestselling authors publishing under the category. oh well. in 2015, sarah j mass published her new book, a court of thorns and roses, which is widely regarded as a turning point for the popularity of new adult (more on the classification of ACOTAR itself in a moment). NA stalled out for many years, but has recently very quickly grown in popularity, especially for romance readers on booktok. some of the most popular books listed under new adult on goodreads are colleen hoover's it ends with us and it starts with us, ali hazelwood's check & mate, and rebecca yarros' fourth wing.

I want to look at two of these currently very popular authors as case studies to really dig into what new adult has come to mean.

in this 2014 interview, SJM discusses her currently running throne of glass series and the upcoming release of ACOTAR in 2015. she notes that the book is intended for "a slightly older YA crowd (aka steamy times ahead!)". earlier in the interview, she dodges a question about whether throne of glass will be YA or NA by saying she appreciates her teen and adult readers - if I had to guess, the label was still too new and publishers didn't want to alienate anyone. in 2023, I can't find anything on her website or bookseller sites that specifically identify the series (or any of her series) as YA, NA, or adult. however, Goodreads (which relies on user generated tags and is, to put it lightly, a mess wrt information organization) firmly classes ACOTAR as YA - almost 9k tags in young-adult and ya (lack of authority control is just one aspect of the mess), as opposed to about 3.5k new-adult. the thing is, though, ACOTAR comes up in essentially every blog post and article I read on the definition of new adult. it is a flashpoint in the discussion: it either did or didn't restart the term, it is or isn't too sexually explicit to be classed for teens, the writing is filled with young adult tropes and this does or does not matter. the answers to these questions aren't particularly important to me, but it's very interesting to see how people are attempting to draw those boundaries. I took a quick census of how SJM's series are classed in my library system. her throne of glass series is uniformly shelved in YA; ACOTAR is mostly YA with a few copies in adult, and her newer crescent city series is mostly adult with a few copies in YA. I do think that any discussion of ACOTAR is partially colored by this divisive relationship to the new adult category itself, so I'd also like to bring in a much newer book facing similar conversation.

if you follow this blog you might already know that I have an entirely non-neutral relationship to ali hazelwood; I love her books both as books and as cultural objects deserving of study. previously, she published three adult romance novels and a set of adult romance novellas, which all fall firmly and inarguably into those defined categories, based on age range and content (I have an argument for the love hypothesis being a horror story, but that's a different conversation). last year, she published her newest book, check & mate, as a young adult romance. it was widely marketed as such by the young readers imprint at putnam. however, on reading it, I (and many goodreads commenters) were surprised to find that it aligned more with some hallmarks of new adult. the characters are out of high school, and the challenges and growth moments are more focused on evolution, rather than coming of age. one blog post I read made the argument that YA is about high school firsts and NA is about adulthood firsts. this is amorphous, partially because there is no real one life path into adulthood by which to judge this, so let's switch focus to something more concrete: sex. in each of Ali's adult novels, there are a few explicit sex scenes. they're not as explicit as other romance novels, but they're definitely not fade-to-black. in check & mate, characters have sex, but it happens entirely off-screen and any discussion is fairly chaste or, at most, relying heavily on implied content. this is a real disconnect to me. much of NA lit (ACOTAR included) is quite sexually explicit. among those most popular NA books on goodreads, there are many books that get marketed specifically for their sexual content (spicy🌶️ to the tiktokers, smut to everyone else). to me, this cements check & mate as a YA novel - if she was going to write a book with explicit sex, like her others, she could've. she's mentioned in interviews that her chess novel concept originally featured older characters, and she aged them down once she realized what kind of story she wanted to tell. to me, it is telling that moving from adult to YA creates more clumsy caution around the handling of sex, as opposed to SJM, whose books "aged" upwards over time.

another interesting example I've noticed in the emerging NA space is how the age category intersects with genre. YA as a category has a pretty expansive genre playing field - we've all read YA fantasy, contemporary romance, historical fiction, action/adventure, issue novels, etc. NA so far seems pretty exclusively limited to romance as a main focus, especially in the most popular offerings as discussed above.

I've seen many a tiktok alleging that despite the drawn out fight scenes, extensive lore, and huge interconnected web of characters, the ACOTAR books are not "real fantasy." even more so for the fourth wing books. I've seen these books compared to Tolkien, as if to say, well, if you didn't invent a language, you're not really on the same level. that's entirely unfair, imo - plenty of fantasy doesn't engage at that level. but there is a wide array of contemporary fantasy I do think we can contrast with ACOTAR and other popular NA series.

we've discussed some of the hallmarks of YA and NA as categories: the age range of characters, coming of age, explicit sex for NA. i'd add fast-paced, immersive writing, especially in first person or close third, because so much of the appeal described on booktok is a book sucking you in completely. now, i want to bring up a few books that, on the surface, might check several of these boxes: dune by frank herbert has an 18yo protagonist, and the first book is very much a coming of age story. eragon (christopher paolini) and the name of the wind (patrick rothfuss) focus on a young person coming into their magical abilities through school/mentorship, a similar setting to many YA series. mistborn (brandon sanderson) and game of thrones (george r.r. martin) both have prominent protagonists that are 18 or younger when the story starts. of all these series, only eragon has young-adult as its most popular age-related tag on goodreads, and eragon was, at the time of release, very specifically marketed to and shelved in young adult in bookstores and libraries. some of these books have explicit or non-explicit sexual content, but only GOT has even close to as much as your average NA novel (to my knowledge).

i am not alleging that any of these books should be classed as YA, necessarily. but the glaring difference in their marketing and readership does point to one thing: these books are largely about men, and they are all written by men. i am not the first person to point out this gender gap in fantasy writing, and i don't have anything particularly new to say about it, except to bring it back around to my original point. none of these novels "are" adult fiction, and plenty (plenty!) of teenagers read them, in an interesting reversal of the trends in YA. who is making the decisions about where these books go, and why? what can we draw out about the books and their marketing? how is the future of "adult fantasy" shaped when these are the benchmarks by which we measure new entries?

i did also look into a few of my own favorite sci-fi series by women to see how they ranked by similar parameters. parable of the sower by octavia butler, featuring an 18yo protagonist and sexual content, has no age category at all in the top 20 most popular goodreads tags. it's in adult fiction in every library in my system that owns a copy. ive seen gideon the ninth (18yo protag, and yeah lets go ahead and say explicit sexual content) on YA shelves in bookstores, but its adult tag on goodreads is more popular, and almost every library in my system has it in adult. in my opinion, these books are important in rejecting the "women write YA, men write adult" narrative around speculative fiction, but they're not necessarily an exception to a different trend. it is not difficult for me to think of more adult scifi/fantasy books by women, because i actively seek them out. however, almost every single one of them has a protagonist under 25, as is the case with so much of the adult fantasy written by men listed above. last year, i read the adventures of amina al-sirafi, by s.a. chakrabotry, which was (i believe) the first non-contemporary/realistic fiction book ive ever read with a middle aged mother as the main protagonist. the book club at my library branch, mainly composed of middle aged and older women, read it, and expressed such genuine joy and excitement over a fantastic, adventurous book featuring a woman they saw themselves in. representation really does matter, and it matters to everyone, not just young people. but that's a different soapbox.

young readers are extremely picky. i've watched many a teenager (or younger) browse the YA section and turn up their noses at books with a cringey cover, an overly dramatic blurb, or just because. marketing books to teens is hard. booktok is an incredibly powerful marketing tool and divisive social force. it skyrockets an author one day and by the next week, other accounts are tearing that same author to shreds. in this environment, its no surprise that the sensationalized books - extremely good or extremely bad, blatantly sexual, shocking, consumable - become flashpoints of discussion. who should be reading ya? who is it for? what is inappropriate for young teenagers to read? what is inappropriate for adults to read? i think about these topics a lot, especially as what the publishing industry terms a "gatekeeper" - i'm a children's librarian; i control the access teenagers in my community have to these books. i take that role seriously, and i want to be thinking deeply about the books i put in my YA section and who will read them. our decisions, about where we class books, how we label and present them, how we discuss them: that is part of what dictates what genre and age classification a book "is", in addition to marketing.

#okay.... been working on this on and off for months but im finally fucking finishing and posting an essaY!!!!#2k words on genre classification lfggggg #please let me know what you think.... very open to thoughts esp from people who read these areas !!!!#ok to reblog btw :>#frames

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stackslip · 3 months

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CAN YOU ELABORATE ON TLT BEING A HOMESTUCK FANFIC‽‽‽‽‽

i'm exaggerating a bit, but taz muir was a well known homestuck writer who wrote under the username urbanAnchorite. her fic the serendipity gospels is one of my fave fics ever, but was never finished and it's only by book 2 of tlt that i figured that the clear allusions to it in book 1 weren't just cute little nods but that she'd expanded on some of the ideas/concepts and worldbuilding of the serendipity gospels. to name a few:

the ninth house cult is heavily based on the juggalo church muir wrote/expanded upon in TSG, from face paint to the rituals and a lot of the accompanying prose

act 2 of TSG takes place mainly in a spaceship that serves as "cathedral" of the juggalo cult, and is described to be covered in bones that have been painted in many colors--which is close to the description of the mithraeum

act 2 also features the two main characters being much younger people mentored/manipulated into horrible acts by an old man who is thousands of years old and bickering with his other thousand year old friends/enemies, who seem to share knowledge and understanding that neither the two protagonists do but also deeply resent one another. hard to not read a parallel to john and the lyctors here!

to elaborate on this bc i just realized it: it is heavily implied in TSG that the dancestors (older people thousands of years old) went through a universe reset and built the empire in the image of their own trauma and anger, which would v much parallel what happens to john on earth and how he "reset" humanity

less of a homestuck thing and more of a taz muir thing: said old man is v much grooming the main female character and making her life miserable during the entirety of act 2

a lot of the story takes place in the background of the trolls' empire being a horrific imperialist force that the main characters were originally very excited to join and become a part of, with one of these characters in particular daydreaming about becoming ground troop for invasion while also holding a terrible secret that would have precluded him of doing so anyway. p neat parallel to gideon's own thing here

act 1 and act 2 of TSG are from two different pov characters, with a drastic shift in prose style and understanding of the situation/world when the pov shifts. which v much echoes how tlt has worked so far. part 3 was barely started before it went on hiatus, but it followed the same pattern.

speaking of, the prose of act 2 of TSG definitely feels very close to harrow the ninth's prose. you can just open the fic and check the first chapter of act 2 and how it's written, and you'll see what i mean. there are differences--the prose of TSG act 2 is more inflected with southern usamerican evangelical speak, i think? i'm not american so i can't quite 200% tell

there is an external armed resistance to the empire's violent imperialism and resistance that was supposed to be the focus in act 3 of TSG, which never happened. nona the ninth did, though, and it follows that structure.

there are also eldritch horrors that threaten the entire universe--homestuck's own horrorterrors--that are in the background of TSG and implied to be an important part of the future plot that we never saw. tlt has the ressurrection beasts

taz muir's worldbuilding around the blood castes in og homestuck that she elaborates on in TSG also somewhat parallels the way the houses function in tlt

iirc there's also worldbuilding around space travel in tlt (such as the obelisks? i think that's the name? and the use of necromancy to power them) that parallels taz muir's own take on how space travel works in the troll empire, using psionics and draining them dry in a similar way

i think the necro-cav relationship 'ideal' is based around how taz also interpreted moirallegiance in not just TSG but all her homestuck fics, down to how its legal implementation and the idealization of it vs its role in troll/houses imperialism and the reality of blurred lines in "expected" relationships. i'd love to hear taz's discourse on troll romance

i also think the necro-cav relationship parallels the other legal pairing explored in TSG--legislacerator and subjugglator.

there are probably more parallels i am missing--i need to reread TSG soon, as i haven't in a while. there are elements i'd say are more like, how taz herself elaborated on the bones of the worldbuilding of homestuck and then made it her own thing, which is rad as hell. other elements are more fun nods, such as gideon's aviator glasses being shamelessly stolen from dave homestuck, and a lot of gtn's prose feeling very homestuckey. it's def not like, just a little rewrite and boom, you get the locked tomb! imo it's more elements of plot and worldbuilding that were interesting enough to develop into something of its own and that taz made into something new, along with other elements of other stories (such as lolita and umineko) being woven into it. part of why i enjoy tlt so much is its "collage" aspect, taking elements taz thought interesting in other stories, or using these elements to purposefully evoke specific feelings/moods to construct or obsfucate certain ideas.

#eli talks #tlt #homestuck

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sh0tanzz · 3 months

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hii can u do sohee as bf?

SOHEE AS YOUR BF based on astrology ~

reminder: this is for fun and astrology is smth I study for a hobby, these are all inferences based off of observations and not exact fact unless I knew him myself !!

Scorpio Sun: The stereotype that scorpios suns are secretive is so played out they're just technically shy imo im sorry LMFAOOO. Once a scorpio fully trusts you or has something they genuinely want to tell you they just keep GOING. And the same probably applies to him especially since his Mercury is in Sag. In the beginning he might seem hard to crack or not one to spare many details but once he's sure of you and you two are officially together and solidified oh he's a plain open book. Ofc he's not gonna pour every aspect of his heart out but being secretive really won't be an issue. He has an aspect of sun and uranus so he won't really act in ways that aren't true to him, his freedom, or expression so he'd practice authenticity even within the relationship so you better be in it for the real him !!

Libra Moon: Similar to Wonbin he'd be pretty considerate and would weigh pros and cons before doing anything to ensure fairness. His chart makes up of placements centered around truth, fairness and morals so ngl being equal+in balance is something he'd want for the relationship. Sometimes there's a tendency for Libra moons to end up complacent or non argumentative to keep the peace but I think it wouldn't be as severe considering his sag placements. Rather than being complacent he'd be pretty passive, he'd be willing to engage in trivial debates and significant convos but wouldn't break his neck to prove his point or show that he's right unless it was absolutely necessary. His moon is sextile his venus so emotional balance is crucial so he'd avoid constant disturbances in the relationship so you two remain in harmony; downside he might become TOO passive and too invested in harmony to where needed conflicts are dismissed or he doesn't express himself fully.

Sagittarius Mercury: So...blunt LMFAOO. Honestly Sohee probably says crazy stuff or is more sassy behind closed doors he has sm mercury aspects even some with pluto and mars. He might be conflicted sometimes, has moments of being super blunt and even saying stuff without thinking and then his libra moon brings him back into peaceful mode and he's like "uuuhm my bad". Probably likes fake arguing or small debates. Makes fun of you most definitely but compared to Eunseok it'd be easy for him to apologize if he realized it was too far or hurt you. Instead of yelling he might talk pretty fast and "word vomit" whenever he's dealing with big emotions or anger (especially with his mercury square mars) and due to this he might go quiet during arguments (if they ever even happen) because he knows when dealing with his outbursts he could say the wrong thing or be hurtful when not meaning to. Likes to be playful and even a bit nonserious and childish in convos and tries to make things lighthearted.

Sagittarius Venus: Sigh omg a bestfriend and boyfriend in one quite LITERALLY. Sag Venus has a hard time settling down because they value their freedom and life path so much and they don't really get into -serious- relationships unless they're genuinely enamored with you and can see you fitting into their expanding life. So once he's with you and realizes he's actually in love with you and it's beyond just flirting and pining he's essentially all in. Freedom will be evident in the relationship and there may not be a super specific power dynamic laid out outside of the cheesy "look at how my gf takes care of me.”. He wouldn't abandon his career for the relationship but wouldn't completely abandon the relationship as a whole either but just know there'd be an attempt to split both. He'd be loving and wouldn't be too restricting, flirts via jokes quite literally he would end up being the funniest man you know especially with that sag mercury on top. He values optimism and change and would implement that into the relationship as well.

Pisces Mars: His Sag Venus paired with his mars could show that he'd be ok with someone being the initiator or taking the lead but would still be ok with wanting your attention and doing things to get it (not in a toxic way ofc) . Like he'd want to impress you with unconventionally/casual romantic things or "best friend dates" that soon lead to more. Aw man he's probably a friends to lovers trope type of man like anton :((. Tbh him having a Sag Venus + Pisces Mars such a chill relationship like I said earlier it'd be just like dating your friend.

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barblaz-arts · 7 months

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One of my favourite pieces of your art is the collage of Young Vega, where she’s using make up to put similar scars on her face like Enid’s, etc. simply because of rhe moment where Wednesday asks Vega if she can have a kiss and she gets really upset when Vega rejects her, telling Enid ‘I should call my mother’.

Is there any chance you’d expand on that? We know Enid’s the most affectionate of the two but maybe Wednesday’s usual attitude has caused a severe lack of closeness between the two that Wednesday wants to rectify but is struggling.

I've talked about this before, actually! But okay let me elaborate a bit more.

So, I've mentioned before that who Vega is closest to depended on what period of her life we're talking here. When she was a kid, she was a lot closer to Enid. This because this was a time when Vega was her most hyperactive. Wednesday spent time with Vega of course, but Enid was the one who had the energy to play and entertain a hyperactive child werewolf. Wednesday was always her mother, but Enid was Vega's mom and bestest friend. This distinction doesn't mean one is less than the other, it's just how it is and how relationship compatability works.

Which is also why Wednesday was also so dang heartbroken in that collage lol She tries to bridge that gap with the physical affection that she doesn't usually favor, but because Vega is also Wednesday's daughter, it doesn't always work. Vega isn't always up for it, but when she is, Wednesday is very grateful.

As Vega grows older and becomes a lot more like Wednesday when it comes to her interests tho, Vega starts to become more distant with Enid. She doesn't hate her mom of course, they just don't have a lot in common, and Vega just isn't a child who wants to play around with her mommy anymore. The distance gets worse when Vega gets sent to Nevermore, and Enid is quite bummed to realize she's no longer her daughter's best friend(she's very happy Vega has an actual best friend outside of family tho. It's a very complicated thing)

This is also why the comic with Vega's first wolf out and the Meet the Addamses AU turned out the way they did. Wednesday was the one to comfort child!Vega with a hug because it's not something she often got to do. This was a very special moment for them, and for Wednesday, a privilege. Then in the time travel AU Teen!Vega bonds with a younger Enid and becomes best friends with her all over again, realizing how distant she has become with her mom and getting the necessary push to amend that when adult!Enid comes back.

This is the problem when I make comics that aren't necessarily posted in order lol. I highkey wish I'm able to show all this in a more coherent medium fit for a character and relationship driven story, but I'm grateful for your interest regardless of how disorganized this all is.

So, In a way, I supposed I've expanded on it, but I'm not sure if I'll ever make something that will be transparent about it. For now, just now that these little comics have been and will be made with all this in mind

#asks #next gen nevermore au

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grapejuicegay · 5 months

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Feels wrong to be talking about this instead of @dribs-and-drabbles but Lin is still watching and I needed to scream about the tshirts

The Progress t-shirt with "enthusiasm" and "Los Angeles" as the smaller texts and a a gas station graphic.

"Progress" as Day and Mhok get ready to travel a longer distance than they ever have before, also as Day's sickness progresses. Also progress as Night attempts to improve/progress his and Day's relationship, standing up to their mother for him.

Los Angeles is a beach city similar to the one they're headed to.

The gas station as the first stop from where their journey changes entirely. The gas station after which Day leaves his home and his bubble, spending far more time on public transport and in big open public spaces than ever before.

Followed by this great on-the-nose tshirt. But this scene is incomplete without Mhok's tshirt too

This is the clearest image I could get of the details on Mhok's tshirt but it is a bus with a sunset and some mountains reflected in the windows and bags and surfboards hoisted to the top. Day's tshirt also has mountains on it.

We got the beach this time but we know they're visiting the mountains next week. And we know it's so they can experience the sunset on the cover of the Last Twilight book. So really these two sets of shirts cover essentially their entire trip

But my favourite set of tshirts?

Objet plate, translated from french, means flat object. Standing right next to Mhok in a shirt featuring a globe. With the colours of their tshirts inverted (Day's purple is very similar to the purple on Mhok's collar and the Mhok's grey is very similar to the text on Day's tshirt).

Yes, they're polar opposites of each other. But I'm really hung up on the globe vs the flat object. A flat earth is a very limited amount of space and getting too close to the edge is a bad idea. So, Day's world is rather limited. Except Mhok comes along, expanding Day's world bit by bit. Is it a stretch? Maybe. But do I care? NAH. LOOK AT THE INVERTED COLOURS!!

#the clothes are screaming at me and i'm just listening #lin this is for you <3 #last twilight #last twilight series

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my-little-safe-corner · 3 months

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What could have been?

This time I'm going to discuss deleted script and ideas from Wish, however by that I don't mean major plot points such as "evil Amaya" or "humanoid Star", but rather (at least mostly) minor things that have been scrapped from the general plot as we know it.

I'll be using the (digital) graphic novel adaptation for my observations, which I assume is supposed to be similar to the Junior Novelization, albeit maybe a little shortened.

Disclaimer: Any haters in the comments / responses will be blocked!

When it happens: Just after "Welcome to Rosas". The tourists do get food in the movie, but Asha never explains where it comes from.

Why it was deleted: Not sure, maybe because Dahlia is the one whose wish is to be the greatest baker according to what I read (though it's never mentioned in the movie itself and even if it were, no one says multiple people couldn't have the same wish). Then again, it could be just to shorten the movie since it's not significant to the overall plot, only expands upon the idea of granted wishes a bit.

When it happens: Pretty clear from the image, since Gabo does say something similar in the movie. However, the rest of the conversation is not there.

Why it was changed: In this version, it seems no one takes Gabo seriously when he tries to warn about Simon. While it could serve to explain why and how everyone is content with their family / friends losing a part of themselves all around the kingdom (they either make up some excuse for it or simply don't notice at all), it was flipped in the final version so that everyone actually agrees with Gabo. It was probably done to get the audience to better understand Simon's condition and what happens to people after giving their wishes.

(BTW, in the Junior Novelization, Gabo even says that most people become boring following their wish ceremony, maybe it was changed to focus on Simon)

When it happens: Asha does blow flour at Gabo, but Safi's text is not in the movie.

Why it was deleted: In this version, Dahlia can be seen getting the batch of cookies out of the oven, but the teens don't take them. In the final version, this sentence would cause a contradiction, since if Safi can't have Gluten, why was he even going to eat a cookie? Instead, Dahlia warns him it has lemon.

When it happens: Read the scroll's text. In the movie, Asha sees only one reflection.

Why it was changed: I really don't know. It's supposed to hint at Magnifico's fascination with mirrors even before we meet him in order to establish his character, so why change it?

And now there's a big skip, and I'm moving to Act 2:

When it happens: Amaya trying to convince Magnifico to not use the dark magic book.

Why it was deleted: Maybe to make the dialogue consist of shorter sentences for each character in order for the scene to be more flowing and dramatic, and also to show again Magnifico's tragic past and his motives.

When it happens: Asha and Valentino entering the observatory to find her family's wishes.

Why it was deleted: Because it's just a joke that doesn't affect the plot. There's also another joke he says earlier ("Chaos! I love it!") that I didn't include.

When it happens: It's clear from Magnifico's text, but what Simon says is not in the movie.

Why it was deleted: In the movie, he just says "What?" and there's a bit of a focus on his face. I think it's actually enough to hint that he's going to betray Asha, so no need to keep this text. Plus, it actually paints Simon as more loyal to the king from the beginning ("he must really be worried"), as opposed to only after his wish was granted, whereas in the final version he acts purely for selfish reasons.

When it happens: Just after "This is the Thanks I Get".

Why it was deleted: Maybe to finish the song ominously, and for Amaya to not catch him reading the book.

When it happens: Just after Sabino absorbs back his wish, before Magnifico breaks into the house.

Why it was deleted: I'm sure everyone has already seen this deleted scene, and I really don't understand why it was cut at the last minute. Maybe because they didn't have another song for the credits? Also, notice what Sakina says, Sabino completely forgot his talent after giving his wish, I think it's good there's another example of what it does to people in addition to that of Simon, and again, shouldn't have been cut.

When it happens: Just after Magnifico creates his staff. He does have a very similar text in the movie, but doesn't see Amaya's reflection, just notices her behind him.

Why it was changed: Another reference to Magnifico's love for mirrors, we do see his own reflection in the staff, and I'm really not sure why not Amaya's, since that raises the question how he noticed her (his new powers?).

When it happens: Just before Magnifico's second assembly.

Why it was changed: Maybe to save on animation and just show the teens near the stage.

And now I'm reaching the climax of the movie. This was originally a much longer scene that has been changed a lot to get what we have in the final version.

When it happens: After Magnifico traps Star and Asha.

Why it was deleted: I really can't think of any reason for this other than to shorten the movie, which is already very short. It gives us another peek to Magnifico's tragic past, and shows he wanted to capture Star to not only have its power and get rid of what he perceived as a threat to his kingdom, but also because he envied Asha for getting the help he desperately needed when he worked hard for his own wish, which is very understandable, at least for me. It's a real pity this text was cut, I don't get you, Disney!

When it happens: After Magnifico asks Asha how taking her wish into her own hands is working out for her.

Why it was changed: In the movie he just says he doesn't actually care. Maybe they didn't want to show kids how he enjoys torturing and mocking her.

When it happens: After Magnifico sucks Star into his staff.

Why it was deleted: Again, maybe to not show him savoring over Asha's pain. It's a pity because it shows Star was a representation of her wish, so when it was lost, she felt the same pain in her heart as all the other people who got their wishes crushed.

When it happens: Just after the last image.

Why it was deleted: I guess to shorten the movie, making the reference to the "At All Costs" song at the beginning lost...

When it happens: That's Magnifico's response to what Asha says in the last image.

Why it was deleted: For the same reason, though this text seems to be somewhat unrelated. In the Junior Novelization, however, his answer is longer, stating he needed the wishes to feel happiness, which is also a reference to "At All Costs", and now he doesn't need them and the citizens of Rosas anymore, making it a sensible response.

When it happens: Quite clear from the images, but they don't mention Amaya's wish to serve Rosas.

Why it was deleted: According to Disney Wiki and Heroes Wiki, she was formerly a ballerina, i.e the same one we see in the beginning of the movie with Magnifico granting her wish, so it makes sense to remove that.

When it happens: Everyone celebrating their victory.

Why it was deleted: Because that implies Sakina gave her wish only after Asha had been born, which also means the family moved to Rosas not that long ago, but then Sabino wouldn't have waited "decades" for his wish to be granted...

And that's all! There are some other differences I didn't include, but they are not really meaningful in my opinion, just small adaptation changes. Also, since I had started this long post, I finally got the Junior Novelization, and there are more changes there, which I may write another post on.

#disney wish #wish analysis #wish observation #wish books

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