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#it forced me to do things further in advance than i normally do and it forced me to make marketing building blocks to use in diff formats
sibyl-of-space · 2 months
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I actually finished everything, it's all sent off to Steam to review and all I need is their thumbs up and the demo goes live THIS FRIDAY.....
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anantaru · 1 year
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— rejecting his cuddles
rejecting his cuddles feat. al-haitham, cyno, diluc, scaramouche x gn! reader
a/n: i spontaneously wrote this after coming home from a night out while craving fluff and cute things
genre: fluff, we're a lil bad for messing with them but who cares, right
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— al-haitham
"no thanks!"
you couldn't possibly reject his attempt to cuddle you right now, or could you?
at first, al-haitham‘s smile will slowly drop, not at the reason you might think because he actually is sure this has a deeper meaning, right?
jokes aside, actually he had you figured out from the start but wanted to see how far you would go, putting on the best fake facade one could pull off, it's almost as if he was a natural at deceiving people.
"no.. thanks?" al-haitham was quite impressed on how you managed to reject him this smoothly, it even hurt a little if he was being honest.
He wasn't stupid though, he was aware you were clearly messing with him, his little angel could be a little brat sometimes, that's what he cherished and loved about you as well.
maybe.. he should just try again, right?
with that in mind, al-haitham opened his arms again to advance towards your body to close the distance only for you to wiggle yourself away before he could catch up to you.
"no thanks, i‘m good!"
okay, maybe you were quite cruel today, you honestly didn‘t think much of it and wanted to tease your boyfriend, it was mostly him who would triumph over you so it was natural for some payback here and there.
curiosity got the best of you and that‘s why you were pushing your little scheme a bit further than you actually anticipated to do in the first place, seeking a reaction from your boyfriend.
the second rejection was a literal whiplash right into his face, but then it went clear as day to him, the solution to all of this warmly greeting him.
"okay."
if you could play such game, he surely could do so as well, he deducted that if he was to ignore you now, your fake facade would fall within seconds.
how else were you supposed to keep playing this with him not giving you any attention anymore?
al-haitham was about to get up from his seat as you quickly grabbed his wrist, holding him down.
"okay i was joking don‘t go!"
the slight worry on your face was hilarious to him, how he knew you like the back of his hand was almost scary. In his eyes there wasn‘t anything easier than figuring you out.
"you should stop messing with me before i‘m thinking of a way to get back at you."
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— cyno
the general mahamatra had a busy life, cyno was on duty every day and once he got home after a long night, the least you could do is hug him!
today you felt like you should play a little trick on him, just for a quick giggle in your relationship. Contrary to popular belief, cyno was actually an overly humorous person, even though his jokes mostly didn‘t land as he intended them to.
with that you heard the front door open with cyno following suit. You decided to greet him as always and walked towards your boyfriend as he tiredly smiled into your direction, already opening his arms.
"how was your day?"
normally you would‘ve hugged him first and then ask him a question, but today you stood right in front of him without drawing yourself into his embrace.
"it was good, come here." once cyno noticed you weren‘t moving an inch, he thought he should be the one to just hug you instead, yet after attempting to do just that …
"no thanks."
there was an awkward silence followed by cyno looking at you in slight disbelief and irritation. His eyes were low lidded and his expression tired, he really just wanted a hug!
"okay, i understand and respect it, but i don't agree with it."
typical cyno, now that you think back at it you don't really know how you expected him to respond to you. He was a gentleman at heart and immensely respected you.
yet though he didn‘t let it on, this was truly the worst thing that happened to him, yet he obviously doesn‘t want to force you either.
with a flash of guilt throwing itself at you like a fierce force, you quickly stopped him with a big hug from behind, resting your head on his back with your arms tightly shut around him.
"i‘m just messing with you, i‘m sorry."
ending your little sentence with a tiny giggle to soothe the mood, cyno turned around to face you at last, looping his arms around your body in return.
"hah, funny."
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— diluc
in any other case diluc wouldn't think too much of it, but the way you were denying his physical affection did throw him off in an unnatural amount.
"no thank you, i'm satiated."
"satiated?" the word blurted out of his mouth in an irritated way, he became confused and unable to recall what the most alarming aspect of this situation was right now.
the fact you didn't want his cuddles, which you once stated were the absolute best, or the fact that you stated you were quote on quote, satiated.
satiated by who?
the urge to throw himself into your embrace was always there, but he didn't want to make you uncomfortable. Diluc was patient with you and so were you with him.
yet he would lie if he didn't feel worried about this, the poor guy having not a single chance of noticing that you were clearly messing with him out of sheer boredom.
as a matter of fact, you didn't intend to go this far, nor did you think diluc would grow this anxious now, making up your mind you decided to end your little play after all as he spoke again.
"is something wrong? if i did something you must speak to me."
noticing how he shifted his eyes around the room, the guilt consumed you from within with your hands quickly grabbing his waist to draw him towards your warm body.
"I'm so sorry, i was trying to mess with you don't worry please."
with a momentary silence and his body frozen, he sighed in relief upon snuggling close to you, feeling the fastened beat of his heart, or was it yours?
"hmpf, maybe i shouldn't hug you for a while."
your eyes widened at his overly cheeky, teasing wording, your lips carved into a pout as you searched for his face, placing your hands on his shoulders.
"it was kaeya's idea, not mine!"
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— scaramouche
it wasn't often for scaramouche to search for a hug, not that he didn't want to hug you but he still wasn't completely accustomed to it, to trust a person again and simply relax under their touch.
one might say you were cruel for even thinking of pranking him, because who knows how he would react?
you, will now, know, this sliding second, when he suddenly came back from a long boring day, wiggling himself out of his shoes before he came walking towards you.
it became a slight habit of yours to hug whenever one of you would meet the other so scaramouche didn't think too much of it, he was actually looking quite forward to cuddle with you, so when he finally reached his desired destination, you backed away.
"lets not."
his brow raised almost immediately with his eyes lightly scrunched together in irritation, "lets not .. what?"
his voice had an annoying edge, the one you knew far too well. Sometimes scaramouche involuntarily spoke like that, he didn't even mean to come off as rude but it was a natural thing laced in his tone.
"i don't want a hug, thank you for the kind offer though."
the dazed look of bewilderment on his face was adorable, you felt bad for even finding it cute in the first place as scaramouche continued to tilt his head to the side, rambling in a low murmur.
"i don't buy it, you're the one who can't get enough of my hugs so what are you planning this time?"
his arms crossed around his body, a smirk of his brought out a sense of mischief he was way too good at, a fleeting thought of innocent fun.
in that moment he closed the distance to you almost completely, his eyes piercing daggers into your soul when he spoke once again.
"can you hug me now or what, i don't have all day for this."
the click of his tongue was all it took you to understand that he had figured you out yet again. in all honesty, you didn't know what you expected in the first place.
with a giggle announcing itself out of your throat, you quickly gathered him in your arms, nuzzling him into your warm chest.
scaramouche returned your call and embraced you back with his arms tightly clamped around your body, the pressure applied behind it made it difficult for you to breathe, he was practically clamping onto you.
in that moment you noticed how his breathing was erratic and uneven as well, as if for one tiny second, he really did think he had done something to pain you, something to lose you.
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©2022 anantaru do not share, copy, translate
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miniwheat77 · 1 year
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Soft. (Protective!Ghost x Reader.)
!CW! Ghost comforting reader, Mentions of SA, violence, I wanted smut to be in this but smut felt wrong for the sweetness, (lemme know if I missed any.)
(Summary): Ghost notices the way reader resists his advances and gets frustrated
I'm combining a few of the asks I got for this, hope you enjoy :) you can find them here and here
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Ghost really didn’t mean to seem as persistent as he came across.
It took the both of you many months to begin dating, and many more to be so comfortable around each other and Ghost always tried his best to avoid the topic of sex. Not for any specific reason, but because he knew neither of you were ready for it. But after many months of dating, he’d made a couple advances. He was ready to take the next step with you, and neither of you had talked too much about it.
You either ignored him, or acted oblivious to what he was doing, it was on purpose and even he could tell. He assumed maybe you just weren’t ready but the insecurity got the best of him. Was there something wrong with him? Did you not find him attractive anymore? They got the best of him and before he knew it, he was losing sleep over it. He was a little more aggressive around you lately and you had a feeling why he was. You knew you’d eventually have to come clean about what was going on.
Ghost decided to give it one last try.
He approached as he normally had and was a little more aggressive than he meant to be. Pinning you against a wall and kissing you aggressively. “Simon-“ you tried pushing him off. “S-Simon stop.” You laugh, but he’s not stopping. Your smile falters at his persistence, flashes of what happened to you previously have you panicking slightly. “Simon enough!” You push him off. He groans out and the way he’s acting makes you uncomfortable. “Simon what the hell is going on?” You breathe. “Why won’t you have sex with me Hm? Is there something wrong?” He asks frustratedly. “Simon- what the hell?” You breathe. “Whatever Y/N.” He shakes his head, walking off. A sigh leaves your lips as he walks away.
You felt horrible afterward. You understood him wanting to take the next step with you, and understood him wanting to advance in your relationship this way.
Simon felt horrible. He’d pushed himself onto you way more than he initially anticipated, his forceful side got the best of him and he had made you uncomfortable. He needed to seek you out and apologize for his actions, but another part of him was hurt that you wouldn’t show any kind of initiative to further your relationship in that regard. Or at least give him some kind of explanation as to why you didn’t want it. He deserves to know. You fight against your better judgment and decide to give him some time to calm down, maybe it's a bad idea, maybe it isn't even meant for him, maybe it's meant for you. Time to think about what to say, time to relax for what you're going to have to tell him.
The following day, first thing in the morning, you're sneaking out to his room like you had done so many times in the past, walking right into his room. He's still asleep, and you sit down on the edge of his bed near him. He flinches awake as he feels the weight of you sitting next to him. Relaxing when he realizes it's you. He decides against saying anything, and instead pulls you into him. You lay next to him, sighing. "I'm sorry for yesterday Y/N." He breathes. "I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable and I'm sorry for being so forceful. I just wanted to take that next step with you." He sighs. "It's okay Simon." You breathe. "Is it something with me?" He asks. "What do you mean?" You look at him confused. "Do.. you not trust me? Or... find me attractive in that way?" He asks. "No. No Simon. Jeez." You breathe. "It's not that at all. Just.. Give me a minute to explain myself and It'll make sense okay?" You say. He nods his head. "I think you're stunning Simon. I think you are absolutely perfect in every single way and I should have opened up to you about this beforehand." You sigh.
"When I was younger, I had this boyfriend and he wasn't too kind." You breathe.
You go into more detail, voice breaking slightly as you explain everything he had done to you. The physical, psychological, sexual abuse.
By the time you finish, Ghost wants to hunt him down personally and torture him for what he had done to you. You were so nice and caring and patient with him. Finding out what you had told him has him fuming. You didn't deserve that. "The reason I didn't want to tell you is because I know how much you have gone through and I didn't want to add anymore to your full plate. I didn't want you to look at me differently." You sigh. He shakes his head. "Y/N." He breathes. "I love you." He cups your face, forcing you to look at him. "I love you and no matter what you've been through, no matter what you have done, no matter what has happened, nothing will change that." He breathes. "You are my everything. I would die for you, I've killed for you. And that bastard that put his hands on you deserves nothing more than my face being the last thing he ever sees." He sighs. He presses his lips to yours, trying to stop the tears that are running down your cheeks. "I wish you would have told me sooner sweetheart. I'm so sorry for pushing you so much." You laugh, trying to conceal the sobs that so desperately want to come out. "Simon, I know you'd never hurt me like that. I'm sorry for not telling you." You breathe.
He takes a deep breath. "I've had some bad stuff happen to me too." He looks down. "On a couple of the missions I've been on, I've been tortured and abused in a lot of the same ways." He sighs. You look up at him, eyes watering even more. You pull him into a tight hug. "I love you so much Simon. You didn't deserve that." He laughs. "Nobody deserves that. But you have to work through it. You don't have any other choices."
You lay there next to him for the next couple of hours. Not caring if you get caught in his room. The both of you need this. Need to relax into each other. Finding out that Simon had gone through similar experiences, it hurts you. Despite all of that, he still trusted you enough to want that passion with you and you had resisted his advances. He would never force you. He didn't want you to feel obligated. He wanted you to be completely comfortable around him.
-
You notice after having that conversation, he becomes more protective of you. Pulling you behind him when men approach you, staring them down, the slightest interaction had him stepping in front of you. It intrigued you a lot.
When you bring Simon home with you to meet your family, it's hard for him. He doesn’t wear his mask and he’s skeptical. But it goes well. Your family loves him and welcome him into their home with open arms. Simon is awkward and nervous, but he loves it.
“This is where I grew up, this was one of my first jobs.” You smile. Pulling into the familiar bowling alley. He laughs. He has his mask on, and he’s more comfortable now. “You go inside, I’m going to smoke.” He smiles. “I want to stay with you.” You follow him. You both walk to the end of the sidewalk surrounding the building to the furthest side. There’s a lot of old leaves built up and it’s a common place for people to smoke. A car full of guys pulls up, blaring music. You roll your eyes. You see all of them pile out of the car, making their way up to the doors nearest to you and Simon. “Simon-“ you grasp his hand. He sees a man following the group inside, noticing you. He says something to them, before stepping back and making his way toward the both of you. Simon pushes you behind him, and you stare at the ground. Hoping he’ll go away. “Hey.” The guy smiles. Simon stays quiet. “Can I help you?” He asks. “Oh, no. But she can.” Simon blows a puff of smoke through his mask. “Yeah? Who are you?”
When he says his name, Simon clenches his free hand together. This was the guy who had put his hands on you. “Who are you?” He asks Simon. Simon laughs, ignoring him. “I asked you a question. What the hell are you doing with her anyways? Don’t you know she’s in a relationship?” He crosses his arms. Simon is trying to hold himself back for your sake and your sake only. But he’s pushing his buttons. Simon tosses the cigarette on the ground, stepping on it. “Yeah. She’s in a relationship with me.” The guy rolls his eyes. “You’ve got to be kidding. What’s with the stupid mask anyways?” Simon is fuming beneath it. “Just leave us alone.” You finally speak up. “I wasn’t talking to you, bitch.” He seethes, Simon takes a step forward quickly, grasping him by his throat and slamming him up against the concrete wall, making you flinch. Simon manhandles him like he weighs nothing. “Don’t talk to her like that.” He growls. “In the military they call me Lieutenant Ghost. I kill people like you for fun.” He breathes. He’s cutting off his air. “I’d kill you if she wasn’t watching me right now, because I respect her. If you come around her ever again, my face will be the last thing you ever fucking see. Am I understood?” He seethes. He nods his head. Simon draws back, knocking his fist into his face, one hard punch from the mountain of a man had him falling to the ground holding his face. Simon crouches down. “I pick my teeth with scum bags like you.”
He stands back up. “Come on sweetheart.” Ghost reaches a hand out to you, and you take it.
Simon doesn’t get to see the bowling alley, but he sees you pacing around inside of your apartment. You’re pacing back and fourth, something important clearly on your mind. He waits patiently for you to calm down, waiting for any sort of sign that you’re okay. “Y/N.. I’m sorry if I was too rough-“ you raise your hand, making him stop talking. He does immediately. Sitting down on your couch.
You wondered how the hell you managed to find someone like Simon. What on earth you had done to deserve him, the way he defends you. Seeing him put hands on that guy for you has your insides scrambling. You finally turn and look at him, and his eyes are full of remorse. Without thinking, you lean down, pressing your lips to his. He jumps a little but relaxes when he realizes what you were doing. You climb into his lap and he sighs into your lips, feeling you on him is some kind of relief he didn't know he needed to feel. "I can't believe you hit him." Are the first words out of your mouth when you pull apart. He laughs. "I wanted to do worse but.. didn't figure Price would appreciate that." He laughs. You relax into him. "I'd do anything for you." He brushes a hand through your hair. “I’d do anything for you too Simon. I just.. god. You’re so…” you think for a second.
“Hot.” The laugh that leaves Simons mouth is something you could listen to on repeat. “You’re hot too.” He breathes. Moving your chin to make you look at him. “Nobody touches you. Ever. Or they’ll deal with me.” He looks at you. “Am I understood?”
“Understood.”
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adrift-in-thyme · 5 months
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@skyward-floored and I both noticed Warriors looking less than comfortable in Jojo's latest art and thought 'wait is he afraid of heights??' As someone who is VERY afraid of heights I naturally had to latch onto the idea...and write something about it. Sorry, Wars
CW for blood/injury, mentions of vomit, and descriptions of panic and fear of heights
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In no universe is this enjoyable.
Warriors stares down, transfixed by the sky and clouds beneath him, (beneath him — by the golden three they should be above him, ABOVE HIM like normal). His limbs are leaden, his thoughts scrambling, panicked. His mouth is dry as the Gerudo Desert.
He swallows, forces saliva down a too-tight throat. He and heights never truly have gotten along. But this is a new extreme. 
He’s never been this high before. He’s never been atop an island in the sky. It’s something he was very much fine, never having done. In fact, he was much more fine before the Shadow had decided it would be wonderfully comical to dump them here. 
To Sky, it had been the best thing since pumpkin soup. He was home, after all. Warriors can’t blame the guy.
Still…
He drags his foot away from where it had crept worrying close to the edge. How exactly had that happened?
Still, why on Hylia’s green earth does the hero have to live IN THE SKY?
Warriors glances over to where Sky is eagerly showing off his loftwing to Wild and Hyrule. A short ways away, Time converses with Gaepora. Not far from him, Legend and Wind seem to be engaging in a game of some sort. 
Warriors squints. Are they…are they hurling those strange, little creatures off of Skyloft to see them fly back? Well, not anymore, because here comes Twilight to save the poor things. Not that they had seemed to mind much…
The rancher catches Warriors watching and shakes his head. 
Can you believe these two? His gaze seems to ask.
Warriors dredges up a dry smirk. 
Try dealing with that behavior 24/7, he mouths.
Twilight frowns. I do, is his silent response. Then, his brows dip further, expression losing its exasperated humor. He walks forward, a tiny creature cradled in his arms. Still very much paralyzed, Warriors watches helplessly as he advances.
“Rancher,” he says, cordially, once the hero is beside him – or more in front of him. (Why Twilight has chosen to stand with his toes off the edge of the island, Warriors has absolutely no idea. All he knows is that it makes his legs go numb. He forces himself to look forward instead.)
“Captain,” Twilight replies. He shifts and Warriors’ stomach somersaults. “Are you doin’ alright? You look a little pale.”
“Do I?” Warriors chuckles. It sounds too harsh, too loud. “Must not be spending enough time in the sun.”
Twilight gives him an unenthused look. Warriors grins. The expression feels as wrong as his laugh. Too wide, too brittle. 
Why does everything just seem off right now?
“Don’t worry about me, rancher. I’m alright.”
Twilight studies him for a moment, eyes narrowed. He opens his mouth, no doubt gearing up to pry further. But Four’s voice rings out before he can, beckoning him to come inspect one thing or another. Warriors can’t truly make out the words. Maybe that’s because his ears are filled with the sound of rushing wind.
Is it the wind? Or is it coming from inside of him, stealing away his remaining balance and setting his stomach churning?
“Well, take care of yourself,” Twilight says. He sets a hand on Warriors’ shoulder, with a small smile. “And be careful. Can’t have you fallin’ off the edge there.”
Warriors looks down and immediately regrets it. He hardly registers Twilight walking away, doesn’t hear his brother’s lively voices as they enjoy the wonders of Sky’s home. All he can see is the drop off he is certain that he is mere inches from plunging off of. His line of vision narrows, darkening at the edges, and he stumbles back, arms wrapped protectively around his middle. 
“Captain?” Time is suddenly holding him, keeping him from toppling. “Are you well?”
Warriors swallows hard. “Fine, Sprite. 
“Just fine.”
It’s only the lack of a substantial breakfast that morning that prevents him from getting sick all over the old man’s shoes. ----------------
The next few days are torture. Warriors does his best to keep his distance from the edges of the island. But it is nearly impossible in a place so compact as Skyloft. And the sparse fences constructed around hardly seem enough to keep him from plunging off. 
So, he spends most of his time indoors (praying to any goddess who may listen that there won’t be a sudden earthquake that sends the building careening down into nothingness). 
His excuses are few and paltry. 
“I don’t feel well.” “I’m tired after the journey.” “I need to think about an actual plan to track down the Shadow before he gets too far ahead.”
The heroes can see right through him – he is certain of it. And none more than Time.
“Tell me what I can do, captain,” he says one night when Warriors awakens screaming after a dream of plunging into a sky of flame. (And wow, does that commotion help him maintain his secrecy and uphold his reputation. He’s doing wonderfully.) “Please, I want to help.”
Warriors’ breath hitches as he slumps into his little brother’s arms. Here, with the two of them there is nothing to hide anyway. He couldn’t even if he tried.
“You can get me off this cursed island,” he says, with a dry chuckle. “That would be lovely.”
Time merely sighs and holds him closer. 
They both know he can’t do that.
…just as he cannot keep away the monsters the Shadow sends after them the next day.
Venturing outside of the academy to fight off a hoard of monsters is not exactly something Warriors had wanted to do. He is a hero, however, and he refuses to leave his brothers to battle them alone. So, out he comes into the light of the day, with his heart in his throat and his chest feeling like Ganondorf is sitting on top of it.
“I’m sorry that you have to do this,” Time murmurs as they head toward the tell tale screeches (in the plaza, of course).
Warriors shrugs, somewhat stiffly. “Who knows? I could get lucky.” He sends Time a grin and plunges his sword into the first of the monsters. “Maybe the Shadow will open another portal.”
Time smirks. “Perhaps, he will.”
-----------------
The fight drags on all morning. Warriors fares well enough through it. He remains in the center of the plaza as often as he can and his brothers take care of the stragglers around the edges. He does his best not to look at them when they toe the edge, heedless of certain death less than inches away.
And he fights on with the same ferocity as he always does.
…until about midmorning. Because that’s when the moblin shows up. 
It is one of Sky’s – hulking and corpulent and capable of taking at least ten bokoblins with one hefty swing of its spear. But he has fought this kind before. With a smirk, he rushes forward to engage it.
He hacks away at its shield easily, then readies himself to dodge as it roars in rage. It rears back, then bends its head, smoke puffing out of its nostrils. 
Warriors raises an eyebrow. He hefts his sword more firmly into his hand.
“You gonna come and get me?”
It roars again and breaks into a run. He steels himself, tensed for the strike. One second, two, three…
“Warriors look out!”
Something hits him from behind – something big and bulky and heavy. It slams into his side, breaking bones on impact. He gasps, vision going spotty. 
And suddenly he is flying. His feet leave the ground and he is tumbling, head over heels through the air. The world is a blur of color, up is down and left is right. He is almost certain that he’s going to be sick.
Then, it’s over. He hits the ground in a tangle of limbs and fabric. Blood fills his mouth and he chokes on it. 
“Captain!”
Running feet sound in his ears. He blinks, dazedly, trying to bring everything back into focus. It feels like the moblin has taken to tap dancing on his skull.
“Ugh…”
“Captain!”
There is panic in that voice, he realizes sluggishly. There must be a reason for that, there has to be…
His vision clears just enough that he can make out a gigantic something looming above him. He tries to push himself up for a better look, but his upper half seems to be on a slightly different level than his bottom half. When he allows himself to lay down fully he sees only sky.
Ah…that would explain it.
Panic pierces him far deeper than any spear ever could. He digs his fingernails into the grooves in the pavement, gritting his teeth against the pain and oncoming unconsciousness.
Don’t pass out. Don’t pass out…
“Captain!”
He tries once more to pull himself up and fails. 
Warriors lets out a grow of aggravation. He really wishes his brothers would exert more energy on fighting off this thing and getting him back on land than yelling his title repeatedly.
…though maybe he has heard it a few more times than they have really said it. 
The monster raises its weapon just as Twilight comes out of nowhere, leaping forward to skewer it. The rancher’s sword strikes home seconds before the monster’s can, piercing it through. And the next thing Warriors knows, he’s staring up at the concerned face of his brother.
“Are you alright?”
Twilight leans forward, grabbing his hand and supporting his back as he drags him away from the edge. Warriors slumps against him with a relieved sigh.
“Just great,” he slurs and Twilight chuckles. 
“Don’t worry. We’ll get you a potion and you’ll be just – ”
Warriors isn’t entirely certain what happens. He is too dazed to comprehend the events that occur in quick succession.
One moment he is held in Twilight’s arms and the next, the rancher is wrenched away from him with a grunt of pain and shock. Then, something collides with Warriors’ chest…
And he’s falling.
His stomach turns to lead, the wind rushes past at breakneck speeds, his scarf tangles about his limbs. Panic courses through his veins, beating in time with his pounding head and thumping heart. It encases him like a vice, paralyzing him, chasing away all other feelings, all other sensations save for icy, thick, undefeatable terror.
Warriors shuts his eyes and grits his teeth. He can’t breathe. He’s going to be sick, he’s sure of it.
…Or maybe he’ll die before that happens. Maybe he’ll collide with the hard ground and in a quiet, contained explosion of agony be gone. 
And after he had just gotten up the courage to propose to Arty too. Isn’t that just his luck.
“Hold on, Wars!”
An inhuman cry rings out, free and brave and strangely familiar. In the next moment Warriors’ lands with something blessedly solid. Arms wrap around him, warm and strong. A heart beats fast beneath the chest he collapses against. 
“I’ve got you, captain,” Sky breathes. “I’ve got you.”
He drapes his sail cloth over Warriors’ trembling shoulders. Warriors clutches it so tightly his fingers ache. 
“Get me somewhere low to the ground,” he whispers, in between haggard breaths. “Please.”
“Don’t worry.” Sky’s voice is kind. “I’m bringing you to the Surface.”
The Surface. That sounds promising. Warriors can only hope that it is as solidly on the ground as the name suggests.
He won’t see it if it is, though. He keeps his eyes stubbornly closed the entire trip.
---------------
The Surface, it turns out, is just plain, old Hyrule. Which, in Warriors’ book, is pure heaven. 
“I still can’t believe no one thought to tell me about this place,” he gripes as he limps out of Sky and Sun’s cozy, little cottage, two days later. “Why would anyone want to stay up in the sky when we could be down here, on the ground?”
Twilight smirks. The rancher has been cooped up with him for the last few days as they healed from the injuries they got on Skyloft. And Warriors has to admit that he has appreciated his company. 
“I still can’t believe you’re afraid of heights.” Twilight grins innocently at him. “The great Captain of the Hyrulean Army, scared of a little sky island.”
His tone is light and teasing and Warriors feels no pain from the jabs. But he scowls anyway.
“I’m scared of falling off a ‘little sky island.’ Which, coincidentally, I did and nearly died. Given that, I’d say the fear is warranted.”
Twilight hums. “So, what you’re saying is fear of heights is really a fear of falling.”
Warriors sighs. He looks out over the small town Sky and Sun are building, smiling slightly as he spots Time and Wind fishing in a nearby stream. It’s lovely, really, how he’ll be able to enjoy those activities with them now that he isn’t trapped in the grip of nauseating fear.
“I don’t know, rancher,” he says, shrugging. “Call it what you want. All I can say is that I want my feet firmly on the ground.”
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cosmohause · 1 year
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Assorted Doctor Iceberg Headcanons and Trivia Part 1.
Hi, this is my mega-list of headcanons, theories and general trivia for Iceberg part one! These are based on a mix pseudo-memories (IRL/DA shit dw abt it), dreams and general headcanons.
Below the cut are the long winded list for easy view. Idm inspiration but please don't steal them since as said most of it is based on memories that are very real to me thank you! /gen.
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i. Iceberg's full name is Joshua-Ellis Tyler Gills, his name "deadname" being Ellis, but he still enjoyed being called it so he decided to add it apart of his newer name of Joshua, thus it becoming hyphenated. His middle name was something he gave too himself as he is a massive fan of Tyler. The Creator.
ii. He grew up in a small town in Florida, USA. But was born somewhere else during a trip his mother and father was on. He was born in a hospital in Chicago.
iii. Iceberg always had poor eyesight, this was made worse when his anomaly kept freezing his tears which would often stab him in the eyes- this rendered Iceberg to having poorer vision and only really being able to cry in showers, and learn how to bottle everything up. Do Not Cry. Thankfully the prescription he has no allows him to see, but due to factors his vision is considerably a lot worse than for example: Doctor Glass and/or Kondraki, etc.
iv. During his time in the military he was sent on the field a good few times, and Iceberg was great and experienced with both a gun and knowledge in explosives to the point where his behavior grew concerning, enjoying blowing shit up a little too much and very much excited when the enemy stepped on an explosive device he modified. This grew to a level where he was forced to stay the military base instead, which his efforts were put to use. He helped researched on a cryogenics stasis chamber, designing it and overall helped on the engineering of it. But one thing led to another, an argument broke out and Ice was pushed inside the untested chamber. And there he was frozen in time. Who knows how many days if not weeks passed by before the stasis chamber started to malfunction, waking Ice up and exploding. Of course, Iceberg survived, but wasn't left without being injured with burn scars and frostbite and of course earning his anomaly.
v. Iceberg's anomaly itself wasn't an instantaneous affair; rather it slowly became more and more apparent after the incident. It was first just that Iceberg feeling cold and stiff, those who touched his body felt coldness of someone whose been outside on a winters day with little to no protection. Over time this anomaly advanced further his once nominal body temperature of 37 would drop significantly to -7, where it remains today.
vi. To expand on his anomaly Iceberg cannot control it meaning yeah nah he doesn't have "Elsa powers" or anything like that - the most that can happy is when he's really sad and low it can seem like he's getting colder. While he can drink water he has to have it lukewarm, if not he sticks to coffee, varied flavors of soda and sadly has to have lukewarm showers to prevent burning and freezing. Ice does not enjoy it he wants to eat and drink normally like he used to but alas his anomaly is a massive hindrance.
vii. Speaking of Sodas: Iceberg's favorite soda is Pepsi Cola, Coke-Cola and Monster Energy drinks. He used to be a fan of sprite but now it just tastes too bubbly.
viii. Would it surprise anyone when I say Iceberg is a bit of a gamer? No? Okay! He is mostly a fan of the Grand Theft Auto series enjoying San Andreas, IV and V the most though. He has played a few of the Call of Duty, Assassins Creed, and RDR games. And you know what? He also enjoys the Sims and Animal Crossing but its a guilty pleasure since he is a manly man and can't be caught playing such!
ix. Now is there any mental soup stuff with Iceberg? Yes! Due to his childhood (explained more in part 2) which he honestly cannot remember Ice dissociates, has C-PTSD, schizophrenia (Hebephrenic type)*. As well as being hypersexual due to trauma.
x. Finally for part 1 of this so it isn't too long. Um. A list of theme songs, or songs that I think generally vibe with Iceberg but I don't consider themes. Some he probably listens to himself. (listen to it here! hyperlink to spotify) please be aware some songs describe sex, drugs/alcohol, suicide, some may contain swears and the like).
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dandylovesturtles · 1 year
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Hey, as a newbie to writing fic and to sharing things online/engaging in fandom spaces, I was wondering if you could share some insight regarding the best ways to make friends and get your work seen? There’s so much good content in the Rise fandom I can totally understand why things would get buried. So what’s the best way to make connections and to (I hate this word but idk what else to call it) promote your stuff? Thank you in advance! Hope things are well and I cannot wait to read your further updates/works. <3
Hi! Thanks for the well wishes!! And welcome to the world of fic writing!
So I'm going to start here by saying that I'm answering this question from the angle of trying to get your work seen and making friends more than getting popular, because getting popular is honestly a lot of luck and unless you want to be really cynical about it and game the system it's pretty much impossible to force it. BUT wanting people to read your fic is a normal and good thing to want; most of us want the things we create to be enjoyed by others, after all!
First things first, the easiest way to be part of a community is to participate in it! In fandom this means leaving comments on fanfic, reblogging art and fic and leaving tags or comments here on tumblr, etc. There are people in the fandom who have become familiar faces to me just because they're always commenting on my fics or tagging posts and they show up in my notifs all the time. Also, I can't speak for everyone here, but when people leave me nice comments on my fics, pretty often I'll click into their profile to see if they've written anything that I might like to read. I've found great fanfics that way!
I know some people are more social than others (I'm on the low end of the social spectrum), but even if direct messaging people is intimidating, just being an enthusiastic presence in the less direct ways I've suggested can go a long way towards making yourself known in the fandom, and you can gain friends over time that way!
Another way you can get some eyes on your work is through fandom events. I've mentioned on this blog that I'm participating in the Grab A Slice bang event (which is posting this month), which has been a fun way to meet other writers and artists in the TMNT fandom at large. There's other stuff like this happening all the time, like I know last month there was an April art challenge here on tumblr that had prompts for each day. And I wouldn't be surprised if we get some secret santa events happening around Christmas. Obviously not everyone has time for this kind of stuff, but if you do, participating is basically a free way to both get promotion of your work and be introduced to other creators in the fandom.
Finally, this is more technical advice that I have, but I assume since you're asking me you're posting work to AO3 or plan to, so I want to say that tagging your work appropriately is really important for getting it seen! Be sure you're tagging your major characters, any major relationships (as a side note, & tags on AO3 mean platonic relationships while / tags mean romantic ones), and any major tropes or themes that people might be hunting for (you should also put trigger warnings in the tags). Usually when I'm on AO3 I'm not just going through the Rise tag unfiltered, I'm searching up "Donatello (TMNT) & Leonardo (TMNT), hurt/comfort" or "Raphael (TMNT), angst" so if someone is leaving tags like that off their work I won't see it even if it's something I would devour in one sitting. Tags are super important on tumblr too but they are also... more of a mystery to me... definitely tag your main characters and the fandom though.
Also, don't be discouraged! Not everything is going to be a hit right away. I've had my ups and downs for sure; my least kudos'd fic has 3 kudos (not counting the ones I ported over from FFN because those had different post dates - my actual least kudos'd fic has no kudos). Remember that writing fic is ultimately for fun, and really as long as you write something you yourself have fun reading then I think that's a success!
I hope that this made sense and was not just useless rambling lol. Thanks for the ask!
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youregay · 1 year
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just finished fleabag and I ended up watching it with the lens of fleabag being a trans woman
it started because phoebe waller-bridge looks and sounds a bit like abigail thorn of philosophytube and from there it kind of stuck in my mind and things started coming together
she's a completely normal, beautiful woman who people treat like a freak: she's kind of tall (bridges is 5'10") and people act like she's giant, she's lanky and thin but people act like she doesn't have a feminine frame whatsoever, she's constantly being mistaken for a man or being described as manish, people who know her are constantly surprised when she looks nice and are often reticent to give her conpliments, her having small breasts is a huge focus, etc. in specific, a parter of hers doesn't understand/is surprised when she says she 'carries her vagina around with her everywhere', her father compliments her by calling her 'strong', multiple characters react to her saying she miscarried as if she was lying/that it wasn't possible, and a drunk woman thought she was a man when fleabag was helping her into a cab, among other things
none of these things reflect the reality of how she looks, but how people view her and reminds me of the experience of many trans women who—regardless of how they look—still deal with this kind of scrutiny over normal human variation
further, I think it gives more depth to several aspects of her life; for starters, her relationship with sex. sex is a place where she can consistently get validation that people find her attractive and see her as a woman. her motorcycle bf in particular was very focused on her having small breasts and having anal sex with her, this lends itself to a more sinister reading of him fetishizing her and plays into the theme that men want to fuck her, but don't ultimately want to be with her. it also gives depth the business woman monologue, which I've seen people call bioessentialist (rightly so but I don't think the audience is supposed to view it uncritically). the business woman talks to fleabag about women's inherent depth due to their built-in pain, she is relating to fleabag. reading fleabag as trans makes the rejection of fleabag's advances all the more painful; does the business woman not see her as a real woman after all? it puts the whole rant in a different light and gives more voice to fleabag's feelings of distance from other people throughout the series. this also adds to fleabag's trepidation of starting a relationship with boo despite obviosuly being in love with her: she's afraid of being veiwed as predatory and doesnt know how to approach women. it also explains why people find her overt sexuality so much grosser than her godmother's or martin's, despite both of those characters using their secuality as tools of harassment
this reading also gives an interesting perspective on her relationship with her family. her family treat her like she's doing everything for attention, even when she's literally not speaking, which is reminiscent of the ways families treat transitioning as a grab for attention. additionally, it lends a new angle to her relationship with her sister. her sister views her as stronger and ignores martin's sexual advances on fleabag because she doesn't see them as damaging, something that makes sense if she has unconscious transmisogyny she hasn't worked through fully
lastly, fleabag being trans adds an interesting look into the way she views herself. despite looking very similar to her sister she feels uglier, more manish, and fater than her. she wishes she could have the 'perfect body' and is highly focused on a sculpture of a woman's body throughout the series—completing it with her own head in one of the final shots. in addition, she consistently feels a sense of distance from those around her: she doesn't have friends, she struggles with romantic relationships, it seems like there's some invisible force that makes her different from other people that's making connections impossible, which is something I find relatable as a trans person. being trans can make you feel like an alien, like an outsider in society who's only being politely tolerated (which is sometimes true and sometimes self-afflicted)
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steamberrystudio · 2 years
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Hi! Ok so, I've never said/messaged anything before because I'm more of a lurker, so I'm sorry for not saying anything before now, but! I just want to start by saying I love your writing! Proof, on Steam I have 134+ hours for Changeling and 137+ hours for Gilded Shadows, and those numbers are only gonna grow because I come back to replay all the time (plus we haven't even gotten to Reuben and Yuu yet!). They're like, legit some of my fave games. Anyways, I do have a question/ask other than just showering you in praise. Sorry in advance for the wall of words but I am literally incapable of not typing a book no matter what it is. And that's paired with the fact that I've been wondering about this for a long time now and am dying to know now that Quill's route has been released. So without further rambling, my question is this: How does Neo Human/biosynth biology work as far as having children and just… reproducing and growth in general? I guess? Ok, like, I remember Quill said that they mature super quick where they're fully mature in like 5 years, and he also mentioned having parents and and sister. How does this work? Are biosynths "built" fully grown (and the parents are just the ones who built them? Or maybe where they got the bio DNA from or something?), or can they get pregnant/get others pregnant? If they can get pregnant, does the baby gestate for the same amount of time as "normal" humans, and then they give birth the same too? And once they're born, are they small like "normal" humans and then just rapidly grow into adulthood in like 5 years? Both mentally and physically? So something like looking and thinking like a infant/toddler when 1 or 2, like a child when 2 or 3, like an adolescent when 3 or 4, then a fully mature adult by 5? How does that work if they have a lot of sythetic parts? Like, their bones are zisiltan right? Can the non-biological components grow as they age like the bio parts can? Speaking of age, do they keep aging once they hit maturity? Can they grow old and die like "normal" humans? Can they get "upgrades" to keep themselves going longer, or do their bio parts force them to eventually expire like "normal" humans? If they do age, is it at the same rate as "normal" humans? On top of all that, if they can reproduce like "normal" humans, can they do so only with other biosynths or can they with a "normal" human? If so, how would that work? Would the child be half and half, or more one than the other? How does any of this work?? Ok. So I'm sorry for the question vomit up there, but I just have a lot of thoughts and feelings about this and am hyperfixating on the unknown details a bit, especially after Quill's route, and am just dying to know how that would all work, especially when imagining Quill's past, and his and Morgan's potential futures. I'm sorry if any of this made you uncomfortable or was inappropriate, or is just something you don't want to answer. If so, I understand. Just know that I love your writing! I get so invested and it makes me so curious to know everything about the beautiful worlds you create! <3
Some of the answers to your questions are undefined intentionally (I just didn't want to) but I'll answer what I did make up my mind on. One thing I decided early on is that it's really not comparable to the human experience because humans and Neo Humans aren't the same species.
When you look at something like a puppy and a fawn - puppies are helpless little sausages for weeks while fawns can stand and move around on their own in less than hour. They're just not comparable in terms of development. You'd never be able to understand a fawn's development in terms of a puppy's development. You have to look at it like its own thing.
It's kind of the same scenario. In many cases, there is not a 1:1 comparison between human children and Neo Human children because they're totally separate things.
To get to specific questions.
- Neo humans do not and cannot reproduce sexually, no. They do, indeed, have to be engineered. They have no mechanism for sexual reproduction and fertility. That said, they can "have offspring" with a normal human since genetically, their organic parts are human.
- I ultimately decided that Neos probably use a generic construct for the first few years of their life before being transferred into a permanent body. This gives time for their permanent bodies to be fully constructed. But means that the children probably are smaller than adults (for convenience) but are also kind of…all the same in appearance.
- They do get biological information from the parents' bio-parts which are used for the child's bio-parts (the only gene editing they do is for fatal genetic anomalies. They don't do any other gene editing/fixing) and are able to engineer the physical body by extrapolating the physical features of the parents into a child. So Quill, for example, does share DNA with his parents and there is a family resemblance.
Quill and Morgan could have a child together (you never asked but I felt like that's what you were getting at). They would be engineered like a typical NH child using Quill and Morgan's DNA as well as their physical appearances.
- Neo Human children are pretty self-sufficient incredibly fast. And because their brains develop quickly, they have no equivalent of infancy or, really even being a toddler. They grow and learn in a completely unique way that isn't really comparable directly to human childhood.
- Regarding ageing: One thing that I can't remember if I've ever stated openly is that humans on Arcalis naturally live much longer than our current life span. It's normally about 150 Earth years (so in Arcalian years, getting up into the 200s is really common even without medical intervention). Their "prime" is much longer, though they hit maturity at the same pace. So they essentially become an adult at the same pace we do but then stay in their "prime" for a much longer period.
An example I use is Keres who, I think, is 50 earth years. I actually made him look older in the game than he should because I didn't want to have to explain the age thing. But he's actually considered quite young still and would probably not look that much older than Caissa. He should probably look like someone in his early 30s (no grey hair for sure). But, I did make him look older to not confuse people.  If you think about life stages, Keres is only 1/3 of the way through, not middle aged like you'd assume.
So the reason I bring this up is because when we start talking about ageing - even for Neo Humans - in the first place you have to understand that everyone is reaching their geriatric stage much later than what you would think. And then, yes, there are medical interventions that can absolutely keep people alive even longer. But brains are organic and that is where the consciousness resides. You can only prolong life for as long as the brain can last; you can't just replace that with an upgrade like you can a heart or something like that.
So I don't have a set life span for Arcalians in general. Neo Humans probably live a little longer than most humans because their physical bodies are already mostly cybernetic. And due to restrictions most humans can't add enough cybernetics to prolong their lives that much. But it's not a situation where Neo Humans are basically immortal. I don't know how much longer their life expectancy is. Maybe a few decades but probably not as much as you'd expect - and humans could definitely live as long without the restrictions to use of extreme cybernetics.
Anyway, I hope that answers all your questions - I didn't touch on everything you asked but mostly because some answers are implied by other answers while some questions become moot for the same reasons.
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Let's Rewind! Toast watches Voltron: Defender of The Universe (1984)
Season 1, Episode 31: The Sincerest Form of Flattery Season 1, Episode 32: A Transplant For Blue Lion
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Episode 31: The Sincerest Form of Flattery
Lotor made the mistake of trying to boss Zarkon around and immediately was greeted with robeasts to "escort" him away from Zarkon's presence I'd ask if you even understood what you were doing, but the answer is a resounding no
The fight seemed so weird until I realized dotu cut out a handful of scenes because they were gory, Lotor definitely stabbed one robeast through the chest and maybe beheaded another
Oh shit! Zarkon v Lotor but for real this time! Lotor obviously is going to lose, but this should be fun to watch him fail at
AN ANIME FREEZE FRAME?? I KEEP FORGETTING THIS WAS ORIGINALLY AN ANIME AND HAS THAT KIND OF STUFF ZARKON JUST CUT LOTOR'S HELMET IN HALF AND MADE THE GUY BLEED
I'm so mad that the main antagonist for the team got switched to Lotor instead of being kept as Zarkon, he feels like a better villain than his overgrown pet sperm
Haggar to save Lotor's life, though she should've let Lotor get turned into a robeast like he himself suggested lol instead we get an ACTUAL mech for Voltron to fight this time, the rest have usually been cyborg type deals
Back on Arus, the team formed Voltron to help out with reconstruction after the last attack on the city that happened We really should see that more often tbh, nice to see the team doing humanitarian (Arusianarian?) work
HUNK I DON'T THINK BEING ABLE TO PUNCH THROUGH A TABLE AND THEN RIP YOUR HANDS OUT FROM IT ALONGSIDE A CHUNK OF WHATEVER THAT TABLE IS MADE OF IS NORMAL
Ooh new defense system, Ad EAS i think Coran said, stands for Advanced Early Alarm System which isn't a bad acronym Apparently the regular defense system detects when an enemy gets within 50 tyketes(?) of Arus but the new one detects and attacks enemies that enter 200 tyketes this definitely won't go wrong
And it immediately gets destroyed LMAO Lotor showed up and decided to mess with it before getting pissed and shooting one of the command ship's lasers right through the satellite maybe the castle should've deployed more than 4 of those things
Actually though, Ad EAS is a good early detection system to help stall for time while the teams gets up to space, Arus IS rebuilding after all so even if it doesn't do much time is precious
The team is NOT having a good time up there, again I know it's for the drama but c'mon guys if you were already freaked out by the legitimate giant robot you have to fight why not even it up with your own giant robot
HOLY SHIT A ROBEAST ACTUALLY ATTACKED THE TEAM MID TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE?? INCREDIBLE IT DIDN'T DO ANYTHING BECAUSE THERE'S A FORCE FIELD OR LIKE TOO MUCH ENERGY OUTPUT SO IT JUST SENT IT FLYING BACK
It's cool to know that voltron has more than one weapon at their disposal, but I wish they were used more sparingly just because I want Voltron to start throwing hands LMAO
OH SHIT THE ROBEAST ACTUALLY MANAGED TO KNOCK VOLTRON BACK INTO THE ATMOSPHERE It pierced through blue lion, getting real close to Allura, so she freaked out and lost control of blue's thruster so Voltron isn't doing so hot
aaand all that hard work for the city has gone to shit, Arus can't catch a fucking break huh, maybe the people should just move further away from the castle, so they don't get hit, assuming this is the nearest town
I'm sorry the joint above blue lion is where most of Voltron's energy is stored?? Absolute bullshit reasoning, the writers could've done better by literally reminding Lotor that blue's already weakened
DID VOLTRON JUST GET STABBED IN THE CHEST?? EXCUSE ME?? WHAT IS HAPPENING THIS EPISODE robeast defeated, hooray!
Voltron just became a cripple omg, blue lion still as a foot btw just DROPPED so confused as to how voltron still existed after that, but the boys disbanded anyway to protect Allura who's out cold after a crash-land
They're still fighting holy shit, usually the episode ends after the robeast gets fucked and the lions are getting beat up too, castle defenses had to chase away Lotors command ship what a wild turn of events
Into the hospital Allura goes, she had an injury on her shoulder, she's fine though as always
/episode end
Episode 32: A Transplant For Blue Lion
WOAH CONTINUITY?? They're picking up this episode with a bit of a time skip to remind viewers that Lotor actually did something right for once
Allura's still hurt, but that hasn't stopped her yet, what a good princess
GOD DAMN IT ALFOR WHY ARE YOU BACK
I always liked the idea that the boys didn't see Alfor as often as Allura did so they just think she's still grieving for him but every time this show uses Alfor as a crutch it hurts ME
Keith being a poetry nerd is such an on brand thing, I'm so sad they removed all this personality he had in preference for making him emo and solitary This man is goofy as hell! He's optimistic and happy-go-lucky, where did it all go
Keith getting angry out of nowhere is wild, he's never done that before especially towards Lance and yes it's out of nowhere because it's not like Lance was being a dick he was just being lazy AND THAT'S HIS NORMAL
Allurance moment though not super convincing to me because other Allurance versions have insane chemistry, dotu lance is for my mutual thank you
A militia! Good on the nearby townsfolk for choosing to fight against Lotor on their own grounds, I mean they will probably get DECIMATED, but they've got the spirit
Training time, the blue lion has been repaired fairly quick actually and Allura is having a tough time with keeping up I do like that this show shows her struggling and actively working to do better but like a little more continuity please? I say as it's a show aimed for children
NANNY I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU DON'T GET IT THROUGH YOUR HEAD THAT NOBODY CAN REPLACE ALLURA ANYMORE I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF, GOOD GOD I WOULDN'T BE SURPRISED IF IT CAME OUT THAT SHE WAS A DRULE SPY ALL ALONG BUT SHE'S NOT EVEN SMART ENOUGH FOR THAT ROLE NOW IS SHE
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Animation error? Is that Keith the blue pilot uniform
Some Hunk focus! I wonder if he has some kind of rejection sensitivity because he just started bawling when as the left leg of voltron got hit and fell off like allura's did last episode, very much doesn't like making mistakes
And the attack begins! As I thought the town is burnt to hell though the people did fight for a while so good for them EXCEPT HUNK IS STILL THINKING HE'S EXPENDABLE LIKE SIR THOSE ARE NOT GOOD THOUGHTS SUICIDE IS NOT THE WAY
Looks like the training actually helped! They blew up the robeast's head without forming Voltron, though they still formed up because they have to double tap the thing to make sure it isn't still kicking
ALFOR WHY ARE YOU EVEN BACK AGAIN, STAY DEAD ASSHOLE
Robeast defeated and a pregnant woman from earlier in the episode gave birth by the end! How cute, though using Voltron or Voltrisha as a name for an actual child is literally setting them up for bullying OSIDN
/episode end
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mint-yooxgi · 2 years
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hello there, hope you've been doing well! can I ask for a part 2 for the Test of Love (Yandere!Yuta) drabble if its ok? thanks!
Part One
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Two months into your relationship and Yuta swears he’s never been tested so much in his life. Normally, he prides himself on his patience. It took him two semesters to confront you about you brushing off his advances, after all. However, this is a brand new can of worms he never realized would be as trying as it is.
Never in his life has he wanted anyone as badly as he wants you. 
So far, your relationship has been going pretty smoothly. Some days he has to remind you about his affection, reassuring you that it’s really you he wants, and no one else. Yuta, of course, doesn’t mind at all, especially not when you reassure him right back, unprompted. He’s willing to be patient with you, that’s what he keeps telling himself. Only, you don’t seem to realize the power you hold over him.
How far can he push you until you crack?
Every time he’s able to fluster you, he can feel his heart racing in his chest. Seeing that adorably shy expression cross your features is everything to him, and flustering you has become one of his new favourite hobbies. Whether it’s out in public, around your friends, or even just home alone, Yuta never fails to make your own heart race from his words and actions alone.
Only, Yuta wants more.
He wants his hands roaming your body. He wants to hear those sweet little whimpers fall from your mouth while he kisses every inch of you. Yuta wants nothing more than to make you his in every meaning of the word, and show you just how much he loves and appreciates you.
The only problem is, he can’t. At least, not yet.
Respecting you and your boundaries is, of course, his number one priority. Never would he force you into something you’re uncomfortable with. He just wishes he could take things a little further during those private moments together, but you’re just so shy.
It’s adorable. It really is. Especially when you let him take control like this. He lives for it.
However, what he's not expecting is this specific turn of events.
The two of you are currently at your place, curled up together on the couch watching a movie. His hand is on your thigh, drawing small circles on your skin with his thumb, a smirk tugging at the corner of his lips as your head rests on his shoulder.
Shifting slightly, Yuta turns his head to look at you as you lift your head off of him. His heart flutters at the way your one hand comes to cup his cheek in our hand. A moment later and he feels your lips pressed to his.
Humming his content, his grip tightens on your thigh, lifting it so that you’re leg is now across his lap. He always wants to be as close to you as possible. No, he needs to be.
Slowly, his hand creeps up your thigh, and the small hitch in your breath he hears has him smiling into the kiss.
“So needy,” he hums against your lips, pulling back slightly to rest his forehead on yours as he looks into your eyes. The pout you give him in return is nothing short of adorable. “You have no idea what you do to me, do you?”
The way your lips part as his free hand slips beneath the material of your shirt has him smirking once more.
Only, what he doesn’t expect, is for you to smirk right back. “Oh, I think I do.”
In an instant, you’ve pulled yourself into his lap, pushing him back onto the couch. Yuta’s eyes are wide as your fingers tangle themselves in his hair, pulling his head back slightly and exposing his neck. Immediately, your lips are on him, and his breathing deepens, hands tightening their hold on your waist as he pulls you in closer.
“You little minx,” he sighs, eyes slipping closed in bliss as he feels you begin to grind down on him from above.
Your giggle has his eyes opening to meet your hooded gaze, a devious look shining behind your own, “you’re not the only one who knows how to tease.”
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citrus-cactus · 1 year
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On Hobbies: Productivity and Prioritization, Discipline and Dissatisfaction
This is going to be a topic that may feel like it's coming out of left field, but it's something I've been thinking about a lot recently and honestly I'm looking for a little feedback here, since I feel pretty stymied at this point and I think it would do me some good to talk it out.
I'm a hobby artist with a full-time job. And other hobbies. Who often gets ideas for her hobby art. A LOT of ideas. It is pretty much a guarantee that I will have a list of approximately 5 things I WANT to create at any given time... but because my rate of artistic output is so slow, what usually ends up happening is that of those 5 things, I'll create one, and gradually lose interest in the rest. But not to worry, because the reason I lost interest in the old things is I've had 4-5 NEW ideas in the meantime! So then I make a new list. Rinse and repeat: 5 more ideas. One piece of art that makes it through the gauntlet of creation. Etc.
The problem right now (one of them) is that I have a LOT of ideas I don't want to let go of right now. Things that have been in my brain (on my list) for MONTHS, in some cases a YEAR, because I think they are things that should exist in the world, and they are things that I (at least, in theory) still want to create. Some of these are still on my list because they are much larger projects than what I usually attempt. These things would be a good experience for me, get me outside my comfort zone, force me to experiment, etc. And yet, I'm not actively working on any of them. Most I haven't even started. And new ideas are (still, always) banging on the door, begging for attention. My desire to chase those new and shiny things is (still, always) high, but my ability to actualize any idea, old or new, in a manner that would allow my art-drawing brain to keep up with my idea-generating brain, is low. I simply cannot keep pace.
And the last part is normal, it's fine, and is theoretically where taking stock of priorities comes in. But right now I'm at the point where I almost find it impossible to prioritize these big, hefty projects. Every one of those that have been on my list for forever and that I don't want to let go of are hard. And I almost always end up prioritizing the quick, easy, shiny, new ideas over the long and difficult ones. Quick and easy gets you likes and reblogs now. Long and difficult (and not related to the fandom I'm currently known for, or any fandom, period!) may result in the same (or most likely less!!!) engagement, much, much further down the road. I hate that I've become this way-- chasing that dopamine hit of people liking/reblogging the things I post on this website (and feeling a little resentful when they don't). I really want to wean myself off of this unhealthy behavior. Which is another reason to work on the slow, difficult things... even if I go through all that effort and ultimately no one gives a hoot (...right???).
So anyway. This is my long-winded dilemma: wanting to create (certain) things but currently lacking the discipline to really put in the work for the lack of short-term reward, and feeling stuck and dissatisfied as a result. So my question to any creative-types still reading is this: Is this something you struggle with, currently or in the past? What steps have you taken to try to overcome it? How can I, as a hobby artist whose idea-brain is writing checks her artistic ability can't cash, break down what feels like an insurmountably large workload into something more manageable, and feel like I'm making progress toward my artistic-hobby goals again, especially given the success-is-tied-to-likes mind poison outlined above?
If you have any advice here, thanks in advance.
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maranull · 2 years
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"analyzing" a 6 month old trailer cause I have a very normal amount of feelings about a character:
(part 1/2 cause tumblr is a lil shit about using more than 10 images)
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First things first. Both combatants are respectful of each other. In the above shot, Radahn is waiting for her to readjust her arm and in the next she is the one waiting on him to ready his swords.
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From Malenia fixing her arm, we can assume that she has had trouble either reaching him or fighting him. Radahn's swords are driven to the ground and given his stance, I assume that he was either waiting for her to pass through his army, or that she was pushed so far back in their previous joust that he had time to pose for the camera.
Given his whole holding the stars deal, if feel it makes sense he held back from the fight and Malenia cut through his troops to reach him.
Malenia is worn down. Radahn seems like he just unsheathed his weapons for the first time in a while (given the amount of dirt he kicks up from around his feet and Leonard).
~~~
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Here we get the first close up of Malenia. Bunch of things to note.
She just looks so fucking cool and beautiful.
Her eyes are already bleeding, before she even starts fighting Radahn.
The Rot on her arm looks like a basket weave. Also very stiff and dry looking.
I like the manicure.
Her gold arm has some sort of mechanism to lock in her sword.
It looks like she always fought blind/ semi-blind. Her helmet almost fully restricts vision.
It looks like they fucked up the fabric physics at her left elbow.
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She initiates and covers the full distance with a single leap, using her body to cover the movement of the her sword. But then she just ends up parrying, edge to edge, and the shot cuts to black so I can't tell if it's supposed to be a nod to her swordsmanship or it just looked cool. Probably the later.
~~~
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Cut from black, they start at different positions so its sometime later in the fight.
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Malenia sacrifices her arm to advance closer, probably because even her long ass sword can't match the range Radahn's "swords" have.
Also, I'm pretty sure that she lacks the scarring around her eyes and above her cheeks here. Meaning this battle is the point where she looses her eyes.
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She fucking grabs her sword mid-run, mid-air —I'm telling you she's the coolest fucking character I've ever seen— and keeps going. The only change in her expression is that she takes a deeper breath (her mouth opens slightly).
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She then steps on Radahn's shoulder. Why shoulder? Cause his bloody heavy ass swords are still victims to momentum and he just swung with all his might to cut her arm. His posture is most likely leaning to the left, given that if you wanna swing downwards with force (if using a single arm), you do so at a slight angle that gives you more time to build momentum and therefore force (I think? HEMA people correct me pls).
He swung with his left and she stepped on his lowered shoulder is what I'm saying.
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And boom! Stabbed. I think it's a bit lower and to the right of his nape..? The position doesn't really matter.
Malenia is using her shoulder to stabilize the sword and drive it further down.
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She's also holding it from the blade with her other hand. This sword must had been made after she lost her right arm (the fleshy one, not the golden one) cause there is no proper handle for it. It's just a metal cast. Even when the Tarnished wields it, the handle is naked.
~~~
Reached the image limit. Adding a reblog, hol' up
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So, on August 26th I’m getting a bilateral salpingectomy. I’ve been wanting to get my tubes tied or taken out for years. But I’ve always been hesitant to ask because it’s normally hard for women to get approved when they have no kids or they’re under a certain age. I’m 29. I’ve always felt it was a weird thing to be able to be old enough to decide to have kids but not old enough to decide not to have them. With Roe being overturned and living in a red state, I finally decided to say “fuck it”. The childfree subreddit, for all its faults, was extremely helpful with their doctors list. My initial consult with a new OBGYN was all it took. I’m still stunned that I didn’t get any pushbacks or bingos. I only had to go over less permanent options first. My doctor said that I probably knew all of that and wasn’t there to judge, but had to say it.
Then something else incredible happened. I come from a long line of women with painful, and heavy periods. My grandmother had a hysterectomy in her early 30s for fibroids. My aunt in her 40s. My mom in her 50s. My mom fought for a long time to be listened to until she finally went to a new doctor and he took her seriously. It sucks that it also took her having period problems during menopause to push it further but at least she was finally listened to.
I have painful periods. They’re heavy the first three or so days. And I have horrible stomach symptoms. I was diagnosed with IBS years ago. It came out of the blue one day in 2016. I became intolerant to a lot of foods. Gluten being the main one. My periods started getting bad again around that time too. I had a previous surgery (hymenectomy because of a rigid, microperforate hymen) to help alleviate them in 2012. And it worked. For a while anyway. I’ve felt crazy because there’s nothing I can really do other than take Aleve before it gets completely out of control. And even then that doesn’t always help. Especially the pelvic pain that radiates down my thighs and my knees. I get nauseous from it. I was explaining this to my doctor during my appointment. She said that it sounds like endometriosis. Another moment I was stunned. I’ve read about it before. But not once has a doctor brought it up to me when I’ve been in for my periods. It’s always birth control being shoved in my face and a comment that period pain is normal. I’ve also kinda thought that my pain wasn’t bad enough because I can still force myself to function somewhat. I’ve read recently that everyones’ pain and symptoms vary. I may still function but when the pain is bad enough I can’t concentrate on the task at hand. I may be present and not in bed, but I’m not really functioning like I should be.
Anyway, I had a ultrasound and everything was normal. I’m pretty sure they were looking for ovarian cysts and fibroids (considering my family history) but nothing was found. Endometriosis can’t usually be seen on ultrasounds. Sometimes really advanced stages can be but even then that’s rare. I guess I’m scared to not have it. And scared to have it. I don’t want to feel crazy anymore. But endometriosis can’t be cured. At least not right now. My head is going to be a jungle of anxiety and worry until my surgery. I just want to know at this point. She seemed pretty confident when she said it but I guess it’s just one of those things where I don’t trust myself or my symptoms to totally believe it.
Then there’s trying to avoid getting sick before. Mainly trying to avoid Covid. I really have to stop Googling Covid and surgery and blood clots because it’s driving me crazy. Crazier. Lmao.
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thomine · 7 months
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AUTHOR'S COMMENTARY; sincere sins & serious schemes
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Index
basic stats
overall
world building note
title
pairing
deviation
final
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Basic stats
time: 6 days
total word count: definitely more than 2k. i deleted the document so i can't check. potentially 3.5k - 4k words. not much drafts but i restarted the beginning at least once.
deviation: 3.5/5...???
*deviation from original is on a scale of 1-5, 1 being there was no change and 5 being it was completely changed.
Overall
wikipedia says that noir is “centered on protagonists that are either victims, suspects, or perpetrators—often self-destructive. a typical protagonist of noir fiction is forced to deal with a corrupt legal, political or other system, through which the protagonist is either victimised and/or has victimised others, leading to a lose-lose situation.”
i think those who’ve read my story can sort of see how i tried to stay true to the genre of noir. i didn’t want it to be an ordinary crime!au because, after reading what noir was, i thought it was ironic for thoma—a wholesome character—to exist in such circumstances. it was something i wanted to explore.
because i was insistent that the nature of the story captured the signature of noir, it took me several days to brainstorm the plot of the fic. i started brainstorming for it since day 10 as i thought it would be thoma's day, only to realise his was on 13th august, and then proceeded to not write it on 13th august, breaking my writing streak. so much for "preparing in advance" lol. but i only had one chance, and i wanted to ensure the story would be something i would look back upon and think "i really did try", so it took a while. eventually, i just sat down and wrote what i had in mind—i did not expect that ending. more on that later.
World Building
heizou is part of inazuma detective agency! although he doesn't appear in the fic, i did consider where he'll be in this whole au.
the detective agency is large, and it is probably the largest in inazuma, split into the 3 commissions we are familiar in the game, and then divided further into divisions. those are the 'clans' in-game.
the entire detective agency is corrupted, with the "head" of the detective agency only being a puppet and scapegoat.
ayato's division is anti-corruption except he doesn't outright say he's against those currently in power. although he might despise their practices and makes it clear he's against it by working harder to reveal the truth of the cases, he works amiably with them. those in power, at most, see him as a thorn to their side rather than an actual threat.
this is also part of ayato's plan. due to him being on their low radar, it allows him to do things quietly. for example, the shuumatsuban exists in this au, except they don't have a name. they're simply people who are hired under ayato with no relation to the detective agency. their identities are kept as a secret.
they are considered "cleaner" than those under his division, so he uses them a lot more, actually.
ayato is stringent with who he works with. he does extensive background checks to ensure those assigned to him via the agency are not spies. he's subtle about his "layoffs" as well, and his plots to "split" with them normally take about 4-6 months. after that, he puts them in probation for another 6-months. if you've been under ayato's division for more than that, then it's proof that you've passed his tests.
ayaka is not part of the detective agency. she is aware of their malpractices, but ayato does not share beyond that. although she has requested, multiple times, for her brother to share his burdens, ayato proposed that one way she can help is to keep her innocence.
as the protective brother that he is, he does not let anyone, other than thoma and those working under his secret organisation, get close to ayaka. reader is no exception, and reader is aware of that. anyways, they have other things to worry about than ayato's private life. ayato is also aware of reader's attitude towards his life outside of the agency and hence speaks about his sister in front of them without worry. of course he doesn't share details, but he's not as lip-tight either.
⠀⠀
the timeline of reader and thoma's partnership is like so:
reader joins the team and ayato is quick to point out how reader is a wildcard. they don't have relations to many people which might be to their advantage. however, they are close to their brother, but their brother might not be good company. thoma and ayato talk it out with ayato saying that he wants to observe reader for a few more months before concluding if they should be part of the team. thoma is therefore assigned as reader's partner.
reader passed the 1 year mark. throughout the year, reader has been extremely cautious of thoma, but only slowly got comfortable around him after they had to work together for tougher cases. reader thought the increased difficulty was simply because they got some kind of promotion, but it's really for ayato to push their limits and dig out more information on their brother.
ayato and thoma did have a talk about thoma "getting too carried away". i'll let your imagination fill up what happened, haha. thoma always reassures it's for the job, and ayato trust him, but that's also why when he wanted thoma to extract information, he planted the idea of thoma and reader going on a date.
reader's relationship with their family is... complicated. they're brother is the favoured child, but everyone in the family knew reader was the smarter one. they treated them unfairly because the family didn't want the unfavoured child to be more accomplished than their favoured. however, the brother accepted this, and used it for his own gain. as the fic said, he convinced reader to join the detective agency because he couldn't, and he hoped to pull strings such that reader could always bail him out of the situations he's in.
unfortunately, reader met thoma. the bubbly, friendly thoma. although thoma's intentions are questionable, reader truly believed he cared for them, which loosened the control the brother had on reader.
the worldbuilding for this fic feels rather immense... and as i was listing it down, i realised how central ayato was to this au, haha...
Title
sincere sins & serious schemes was my attempt at alliteration. the original title i was thinking of was sacrificial lamb, but i felt that was too... obvious and cliche.
i'm not going to explain it too much here since i believe the links i've made to the title and the scenes of this fic is rather.. ambiguious, and would need more time to think it through, but the only thing i can be sure of is that sincere sins is to describe's reader's pov while serious schemes is to describe thoma's.
i'm still not sure if sacrificial lamb, although cliche and lacking of alliteration, might have been a better title, but i did like my attempt.
Pairing
i will probably repeat this a million times but slash (/) is indicative of a romantic relationship with a cross (x) indicates a relationship that's ambiguous: you can read it as romantic or platonic. what brings a fic from (x) to (/) is often what the characters do, and in this fic, there is a kiss.
normally, i classify such stories as romantic, but i didn't want the implication of the kiss to be concrete. i wanted to leave room for a bit of interpretation, and leaving it as an act of uncertainty (i.e. we don't know if thoma likes reader that way) leaves the fic with a feeling of dread. we want to believe it's genuine, but there's possibility it's not. hence why even with a kiss scene, it's still marked as ambiguous (x).
Deviation
i didn't have a goal in mind when writing this story, but i knew i wanted it to end in a rather depressing state. however, when writing, it just felt wrong for reader to not stand up for themselves and leave the story with an opening of hope. that hope being they might return to the division and their relationship with thoma might be salvageable.
i remember how i said it was ironic for thoma to exist in such a dark genre. i guess in exploring the juxtaposition of his happy disposition with a grimmer reality, it just did not feel like thoma if he did not make an impact in this darker, corrupted world. even if his intentions are not as pure, i hope it is clear he does care for reader, and as that light of hope for reader, that knife that frays the tight strings of reader's brother, i'm sure reader would have been impacted by him. if thoma were to exist in noir, even if the situation might seem like a lose-lose situation, his presence will always squeeze in the possibility of a win-win situation. it's just who thoma is (to me anyways).
Final
i don't think i can perfectly summarise my thoughts about this fic, especially when that would require going in detail about some choices i made. there are some "parallels" or "symbolic actions" i would like to address, and i want to highlight a few scenes i think are significant.
because of that, i'll resort to my newer style of autcoms, and i hope reading those (not as long and more in-depth) commentaries can help this fic grow meaning.
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drabbleposter · 10 months
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## friendship
“What’s her name?”
A felt more than compelled to listen when C spoke. Oftentimes whatever left his mouth would be nonsense so much so that A never paid attention when he started speaking. So much so that him asking a question in a genuinely serious tone is shocking and has A’s worry stirring messily in his gut.
C doesn’t point but when A looked at him he finally tilted his head towards the person he was talking about. To the side of a populated room is a crying girl. Her face reddened with unbridled emotion and her eyes trained on the paper in front of her that’s shaking in her grip. It’s enough that she was crying but she appeared more haggard with her knees to her chest and her body seated on the ground, her arm hung over her knees and under her tinted nose.
“B,” A murmured his answer in surprise. He blatantly stared, looking around the room to see if he was observing the situation correctly. She was noticeably crying and visibly upset, so she stood out because of it. But why was there no one comforting her?
Unfortunately, A was seeing it right. In the midst of a crowded room, was a crying girl, desolate where she stayed. And A’s dudgeon could only reach an all time high by the time his features hardened into a wry expression.
C approached her after reaffirming that he heard the name right and A followed behind, dropping his resentment in exchange for the poignant sense of dejection.
“B,” C softly called as he squatted down to match her height.
She immediately looked up at A because he was crouched further in front of her, but she had turned her attention to C quickly to match the direction of which she heard the voice.
“Phew, that’s actually your name. I was worried I’d call you the wrong one,” C sighed but hoped he’d lighten the mood a little so he weakly smiled as well. Luckily, B wiped her nose and chuckled at the attempt. “What’s wrong?”
“I’m trying to get this piece down, but I keep messing up. I haven’t had enough time to memorize it yet and I’m the only one doing the instrumental,” She says with the volume of her words irregular.
“How long have you had to learn it?” A inquired, trying to find a way to start the topic. Despite coming to her to try to comfort her as well, he wasn’t the best with his words.
“She just gave it to me,” B answered, pertaining to the show director. She wiped her face to look more put together.
“That’s bullshit,” C curses instantly. He rolls his eyes and appears angered. “I’m sorry, but she always does this. She gives us music sheets to learn three days in advance and it’s obviously not enough time to learn it, but she pressures us to get it down as if it’s our fault.”
A agrees by nodding while listening to C’s minuscule spiel. “For us we just try to get down what we can, technically it isn’t our fault because we normally have weeks and maybe months to work on music for the show,” A explains. B eventually turns her attention to her.
“So we know how stressful it is. But don’t try to make it perfect, okay? Talk to her about it, but don’t put the blame on yourself. You were at the last show, right?”
B gingerly nods, looking over the sheet papers again.
“You did great. I know for you it may seem simple depending on the song but we don’t know much about piano so you really impressed us. So just know that however you do when the show comes up we’ll still love your performance and that you really completed the song with us,” A affirmed, lightening up his tone.
“Right. You did really good and so many of us thought that you were cool both while you practiced and performed. You’re going to do great this show no doubt. So just break things down the best you can. Take your time. Don’t try to learn everything at once, so just try to learn section by section. We’ll be rooting for you,” C reassured her.
“Don’t pressure yourself. The more you try to learn everything at once you’ll just stress yourself out. So just take things carefully. Take a break when you need it instead of force feeding yourself the material. We’ll be cheering for you,” A added on.
Finally after a while she smiled, wiping her eyes one more time. “Thank you,” she murmured.
“Of course,” C grinned cheerfully. “If you can, can you play a part that you know?”
She decided to agree and pulled herself up on the stool. B lifts the fallboard and sets the sheet of music on the stand. Though she was worried about her progress, she began to play courageously. B performed through the sheet of music, following each note.
C and A remained in their spots but fully stood as they watched the performance. The brooding atmosphere was gone when the tune attracted other people to approach the piano and listen.
B chuckled a bit but kept her cool while going through it.
Someone else jumped up immediately and sped towards the instrument. “Wait-Is this…?
B quickly finished the question for her and agreed. The newfound listener brightened with glee before mentioning that she really liked the song.
For a while everyone stayed listening to the performance and some briefly recording before it came to an end. B had gotten pretty far into the music so A had doubted she needed to learn much more than she already has.
A few compliments her way and then the next group was to go into the practice room, unfortunately that meant A and C had to go too.
C went in quickly, seeing as the show director was pretty uptight about being late on an evening of rehearsal. They weren’t supposed to be talking but practicing but obviously it didn’t turn out that way. A stayed back for a little bit.
“Seriously, you’ll be just fine. You did really great just then so don’t worry too much.”
B bashfully beamed, closing the music sheet to return to it later. “Thank you,” she said again. “You too. You all did great at the show, so I’m glad I get to work with you guys again on a performance.”
A snickered. “Thank you. We’re glad to work with you again as well, so let’s have a good performance, okay?”
B looked him in the eyes and nodded firmly.
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